Unhealthy Relationships?! Ft. Atsuko Okatsuka || Reddit Stories || Two Hot Takes Podcast
I don't think I've ever watched. someone's stuff and like been more. excited to meet them and just be like, "Can we be friends?". >> Genuinely, I think you might be the. coolest person on earth right now. >> Wow. >> Right now. You know, cuz like some. people could, you know, >> surpass. >> be born soon. >> Today, right now. >> Right now. They could surpass you. But. >> isn't like a baby born every you know. something seconds and then everything. happens every few seconds, right? >> Yeah. No, it's a scary thought.
>> Yeah, right now somewhere. [laughter]. And also meow. But that's the good news. Kitten kittens are being born, too. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> No, I'm I'm so excited. I don't think. I've laughed so hard as when I watched. your father special. >> Oh my gosh, thank you so much. >> And like the big sun and your colorful. outfit. >> and your mannerisms. I'm just like I. >> I was dying. >> Thank you. >> I'm so excited. color. >> Welcome back to another episode of Two.
Out Takes, you guys. I'm your host, Morgan, and today I've got Otsco in the. house. >> Wow. Proud. No, I'm not going to I won't. start it with proud Disney adult. >> But I mean, cuz we were talking about. it, but maybe. >> How do you want to brand yourself? >> Oh, colorful, fun, son. Yeah. >> Yeah. Almost like Teletubby vibe, but. not really. Just like. >> a little bit. Well, just like and then I. saw your other one and you had like some. other like rolling looking sunset thing. >> Yeah. More colors. >> You bring the props to your show.
>> Oh gosh. I just want Yeah. You know, I. just want you to be brought into my. world. When you meet me in a standup. special because a lot of theaters, you. know, they have their own aesthetic, but. it was like built by a man like a long. time ago. They weren't thinking of me. You know what I mean? So, I just want, you know, the audience to kind of be. like, "Oh, who is Otsco?" You know, and. so even if I'm in a space that is. already decorated, I want to put my. flare on it. >> I say you love that.
>> Yeah. >> Have you ever met a ghost at any of the. theaters? >> No. I'm really afraid of meeting ghosts. And I often wonder if that's why they. leave me alone or I've never met one. Have you had a ghost encounter? >> Not at a theater, but yeah, >> you have. Okay. [clears throat] I I. stayed the night in a paranormal house. Don't recommend it. >> Oh, so this is you seeking it, >> you know. >> You went towards it. >> I didn't. I was trying to avoid it. >> Oh. >> But it just found me. And so now when I. go to the theaters, cuz some of them are. so old. >> Yeah. >> I I ask just so I can, you know, be on.
alert and know who to look out for. >> So this paranormal house you stay at, did you know it was before? >> Oh, I see. >> Yeah, that's a that's a that's an issue. >> I didn't sign up for it. >> That's a problem. >> They found me. But let's get into you. because I I have a feeling you are going. to become a lot of my audience's new. favorite. [laughter]. >> You just have such lore to you. Like. when people meet you, >> how do you even know what lore to start. with? >> Oh gosh. Yeah. I mean that's why I start. light with like you're like is that a.
Loungefly backpack? I'm like yes. Yes. I'm unwell and I go to Disneyland and I. think about it a lot. >> And you came in here like buttering me. up with seized candy. Like genuinely the. sweetest guest I've ever had. You know. what I was going to say is actually I. was going to I I said I I even told my. husband was home and my assistant was. home and um my other friend was there. before I came here. I was like I'm going. to bring the seized candy to Morgan, but. I'm also hungry so I'm going to be like. >> do you think we can open it now? >> Do you want one right now?
>> Well, I ate a protein bar in the car. But yeah, if you if you want if you're. down to open it. >> I need to share. I [clears throat] can't. take this whole thing home. >> Because you also just opened up about. how, you know, seas candy was your. grandma's favorite. >> Well, I wanted to connect with you. >> Yeah. And I'm a grandma's girl. >> Not make you feel guilty so you don't. eat it. >> And I'm a grandma's girl. >> So when you ask about lore, it just, you. know, whatever happens naturally like. that. Like now you know, you know about. me being a grandma's girl. Wow. I snuck. it [clears throat] in. >> You did. I love on your set how open and.
vulnerable you are, too. and like you've. gone through some crazy stuff and you. just tell it in such a light-hearted way. while also like really connecting with. people, but your your shows, too. I've. been watching a bunch of your standup. clips. >> You're just you're so smart. You're so. witty. I love all your bits. I also love. how healthy of a relationship you seem. to have with your husband. >> Oh my gosh, it is. we we work together. and so it's important for us to like you. know communicate and uh have like.
husband and wife time but also you know. work time and when are we being that. [laughter] yeah coworker time you know. when people are like this is my work. husband I'm like he really is and so uh. yeah it's a balance that we're still. learning but yeah it's it's cool I've. always wanted siblings. And uh I feel like I also have a sister. in him [laughter]. sometimes. You know what I mean? >> I am so glad you said sister and not.
brother [laughter]. >> cuz we match a lot of times. Sometimes. we wear I wear his clothes now. He. dresses more like me too. More brighter. colors. >> I teach him choreograph dances. >> I I was like really impressed with your. moves too. >> Oh, thank you. >> I'm like you can actually You were a. cheerleader for three years. >> The lore. Yes. >> This is what I'm saying you guys. Like. you're going to [gasps] hear all about. this Lord today and you're be like, "What hasn't she done?". >> Depending on where you meet me, I guess. that's where, you know, I would start.
But yeah, I was a cheerleader, too. So, I loved choreograph dances with other. people. I don't love going to a dance. club and like doing your own thing in a. corner. >> No, no, no. We should all be doing the. same telling the same story. >> So, you want flash mobs? >> I like flash mobs. I love like uh like a. line dance situation, >> you know? Oh, you know, like. >> I've always wanted to learn. >> Yeah. When everyone's doing the same. coro, so it's just like we're the same. heartbeat. >> Yeah. You know, >> did you ever learn how to square dance?
>> No. Is that different than line dancing? It's like whatever that is. >> I'm not sure. In Minnesota growing up in. gym class, they made us square dance. >> Okay. In in gym class, we learned one. one kind of square dance. >> Okay. >> It wasn't to country music, though. Maybe that's the difference. So, it was. uh What did we do it to? Jeez. Uh oh, everybody. I think it's Everybody likes. kung fu fighting. I think we did it to. that.
>> Um how about you? It was all country. songs. >> It was square dance and then like the. electric slide in one of my one of my. friends parents' garage. >> That was that was the rave back then, >> right? Slide to the left, slide to the. right. >> Cupid shuffle. >> Yeah. Down. Get around. Get around. >> Down. There's nothing more powerful than. a bunch of strangers in a room doing the. same coro. >> You feel like you can move mountains. when everyone's going to the left at the. same time. Nobody bumping into each.
other. >> Bring it back. Bring it back. I mean, you've got so much good energy. You've. got tandem bike energy. You've got. marinating tummy rub energy. >> Yeah. >> Um, you used to sing opera in your. little canada canata. You do toe grips. with your husband? >> Yes. Yeah. Unhinged. >> You You are unhinged. But at the core of. it, I think you can tell a healthy. relationship versus an unhealthy. relationship. And the stories I have for. you today, you're going to let me know.
what you think of them. >> Oh, yay. [laughter]. Let's do it. >> Okay, let's dive in. >> Okay. >> [music]. >> Okay, so this first one we have here is. coming from our very own Two Hot Takes. subreddit. It's titled, "My husband. bought another woman a refrigerator.".
>> Okay. Is this woman his mom? [laughter]. >> We're going to see. >> his coworker, you know. >> Hi, Morgan and longtime listener. first. time poster to Reddit. I am a 33 female. married to a 35 male. We met in 2021 and. have been married since 2023. I'm. writing to see how I should react to the. situation and I always enjoy the. dialogue your podcast produces. My. husband became friends with a female. coworker over a year ago and they would.
send Tik Toks and messages. M. >> this woman, let's call her Kate, lives. in California as the company they work. for is remote and they have offices in. multiple locations. I have no issues. with my husband being friends with. anyone male or female as long as there. are clear boundaries, good communication. and expectations as that is what I do. for him as well. Well, he has friends. that live in California and he scheduled. a visit and unbeknownsted to me had.
planned to have Kate pick him up from. the airport to meet. >> Mhm. >> My gut told me something was off and I'm. not proud of this, but I checked his. phone and that is where I discovered. this plan. >> Oh. I talked to him and explained that. his hiding this meetup made it look. sketchy as hell and that I would not be. comfortable with this. This was over a. year ago. >> Is this when I do this? >> I'd say,
>> oh, for the people just listening, it's. a red flag being waved. Okay, go ahead. This was over a year. ago. And in the time between then and. now, there has been more issues with. this friendship to the point where I. have set a firm boundary that since this. friendship crossed a line, it needs to. discontinue. He was upset but. understanding. Flash forward to this. morning. I just graduated from college.
with my bachelor's in speech language. pathology and I wanted to see if anyone. sent him some good photos and I saw a. text from an unsaved number. >> Oh, >> with the notifications turned off. >> Oh, weird. Oh, no. Yeah, another another. wave. >> That text said, quote, "Why are you. sorry?" Again, not proud, but I looked. Guess who it was? Yep, Kate. But there. were three messages with zero context as.
to why he was sorry. So I looked at his. recently deleted messages. Tell me why. this girl was talking about loving her. brand new refrigerator. Oh. >> And having sent the last month and. upcoming month to him. He is not only. friends with her, but he purchased her a. brand new fridge and has been having her. pay him back. >> I'm so lost on how to bring this up or. how to even go about a conversation. I. feel like this is emotional and. financial infidelity. Please help.
>> Whoa. Emotional and financial. infidelity. Yeah, I've never heard. financial infidelity before. >> It usually comes up in the context of. like paying for Only Fans girls or like. if a guy is being like a pay pig to. someone else or like a sugar daddy. >> Okay. Yeah. But it's not like physical. >> No. >> Necessarily. Maybe. >> buying someone a fridge. I mean, >> but but then she's paying him back. slowly. There's also a payment plan that. he set up.
>> That's kind of the context I think she's. getting. Yeah. >> Is his kink just like wanting to. roleplay being a a Sears? [laughter]. Like he's just trying to be Macy's and. you know, come buy a refrigerator from. me. There's a payment plan. You know. what I mean? I don't [laughter] know. >> He's getting off on the interest. Sorry. to refer to a almost non-existent store. as of today. I think. >> I know it's pretty defunct. There's one. here in Burbank. >> There is. Okay. >> Just like one last Sears left.
>> I named it because that's where me and. my husband went to buy a refrigerator. like a mini one like a couple years ago. >> and we accidentally didn't pay for it. and left. >> Um. >> but you took the fridge. >> We took the No. And then we realized. when we got home that we we didn't pay. for it. But here's the thing. Nobody. If. Have you been to the one in Burbank? This Sears you speak of. >> like probably six months ago. >> Okay. >> There's not many people in there. >> That's what I'm saying when I say nobody. works at Sears. >> Nobody is working there.
>> So he might like this man her husband. might I was just you know he maybe he. has a thing where he's like you know. roleplaying like you know being at a. store that's almost going to be bankrupt. soon. But anyway yeah no one no one. worked there. We looked for people, a. cashier. Nobody was there. So, >> so you tried to pay. >> So, then we put the fridge in the uh car. first and then we're like, "We'll come. back." But then we forgot to come back. and pay. Anyway, um [laughter]. that's what happened. You got to you got.
to have someone work in there, sweetie. [laughter]. >> That's why they went bankrupt. >> Yes. Because people kept being like, "Oh, wait. I didn't pay." But I you know. Yeah. Because we were literally like, "Anybody?" That was us. Anybody here? You know, like a scene in The Walking. Dead. Hello, anybody in this building? You know, and then a zombie comes out. It was like that. I don't know where. you're at. You know, I'll catch you or. zombie. >> It was insane going in there. >> It felt like just a ghost town. >> Yeah. >> And I'm surprised they're still offering.
warranties and stuff because like what. if you close tomorrow? >> Warranties on like goods that you buy. >> Yeah. >> Oh, sweetie. I don't know if we got a. warranty on this refrigerator. >> No, >> we almost got it for free, but we were. honest. We went back. >> So, you did go back and pay. >> You're welcome, Mr. Sears Burbank. Um, but this man, >> yeah, >> it's interesting because it's not. financial. infidelity in that he's getting the. money back into their bank account,
their joint bank account, presumably him. and his wife. >> I know. >> You know, and so that's weird. Maybe. he's just trying to be on this girl's. good side. Why? >> Because they're cheating or something. I think that's what's happening. >> I mean, [sighs]. >> he's deleting messages. >> That like deleting messages. You've set. a clear boundary. He already lied to you. that she was picking him up from the. airport. >> Yeah. >> Like they had a secret rendevous.
>> Yes. >> If they're friends, why the secrets? >> So, I'm just like, I don't want to. assume the worst. >> Mhm. But. >> yeah, >> there's a lot going on here that you. don't know about and he's not being very. honest, >> right? The secrets, the deleted. messages. And then so the fridge is not. the suspicious part. The fridge is just. like he's just getting his, you know, his the girl he's cheating with a. fridge. And so she's like, I got a girl.
Like I I'll pay you back, but I think I. think there's other worse things. happening. I'm And I'm so sorry to hear. that. And I I hope I hope that fridge. breaks down. If I know Sears it she has. eight months. Not to I don't want to get. in trouble from. >> from Sears. Yeah. >> Yes. But we had a fridge from there. Like I said in the story, >> you're speaking from experience. >> Yes. It was a mini fridge. It was cute. But like a lot of things, cute ain't.
enough. That's the message for this guy. >> Cute ain't enough. >> It's not enough. Top comment also kind. of jumps to cheating. He is cheating. Your move. >> Oh yeah. Yeah. >> Next comment down 100%. That trip to. California was for her, not friends. >> Yes, that's right. Yeah. Yeah. Your gut. instinct is correct. And that's the good. thing is that you are asking questions.
and you you got this girl. >> because you are smart to even be. questioning this. Yeah, >> I know. Someone says, quote, "You can. have a long-distance girlfriend or you. can have a wife in your bed, but I. refuse to share this relationship any. longer. Choose.". >> Basically being like, "Here's what you. should say to him.". >> Oh, yeah. Great. Yeah. >> Everyone's given scripts. [sighs]. I'm very curious. We don't. I just refreshed.
>> Oh, >> we do have an update. >> What? >> We have an update from her. >> We do. >> We have an update. After our. conversation, I can confirm he does have. a white knight complex. >> Oh. >> So, he and I are going to do couples. counseling for him. He never understood. my hang-up on the issue because the. friendship was always platonic. >> Oh. He had a moment of getting defensive. and saying, "So, I'm not allowed to have. female friends." To which I calmly. explained that I would have had no.
issues with this friendship if there had. been a level of transparency. I. explained that the optics are saying. something different than what he is. saying. He said the fridge was not a big. deal because it was a zerocost situation. since she is paying him back and it was. purchased with 0% interest. I asked if. she were to stop paying him, would he. just be out of the money or do they have. some type of contractual agreement? He. said it would be a loss, but there's no.
risk because she wouldn't do that. His. big issue with this was he saw a friend. that needed help and helped, so he's. frustrated by me being upset. I pointed. out that I plainly explained my. discomfort with his friendship, and I'm. frustrated by the fact that my comfort. is coming second to Kate. >> Yeah. I said at this point his choice is. that he keeps talking to Kate or he can. talk to me but he cannot do both because. I refuse to continue to be hurt by the. situation. He signed us up for couples. counseling and also suggested that we.
both need individual counseling for me. to address my anxiety for him addressing. his white knight complex. >> Okay. Yeah. I mean I don't know. There's. some gaslighting happening where he's. like and you need therapy. [laughter] He's like I'll get therapy. You get therapy. Hey, you I [ __ ] up. You [ __ ] up. [laughter]. >> Excuse me. >> It's not just on me. >> He got Yeah, he's still trying to like. be the savior, right? Like, okay, see, I. got us into couples therapy. I'm getting.
into therapy. You're getting into. therapy. You're like, hold on. Looks like you're still like running the. itinerary around here. If I you know, >> he's a cruise ship director for sure. I. mean, >> that's what he should do. Apply for. what? I don't know what job he has, but. sounds like this kind of stuff can be. fixed if you, you know, be a cruise ship. director. Uh, consider volunteering at. the local Boys and Girls Club. You have. a white knight complex. Go pick up trash. by the beach. Hello.
>> These are great solutions for him. >> Traveling to California to buy a fridge. that you're going to get money back. from. That's [laughter]. okay. It's like you did nothing. >> No. And he also I'm just realizing. >> just cheat. >> He put it on his credit card. He said 0%. interest. But did you apply for a Best. Buy credit card to buy some other woman. a fridge? Like did you potentially hurt. our credit score, your credit score, our. spending power in order to buy someone.
else a fridge? >> Yeah, it's very it's very confusing. Yeah, it's still bad sitch. This is like. Yeah, it actually it got even weirder. I. don't like this at all. I also really. don't like this next one. >> Okay, >> this next story is coming from Am I the. [ __ ] It's titled Am I the [ __ ]. for sitting on public toilet seats and. not telling my boyfriend? >> M interesting. >> When I, 27 female, need to pee in.
public, for example, at a restaurant or. a gas station, if the toilet seat is. clean, I will sit down on the toilet. seat to pee. >> Okay? If it has a little bit of pee on. it, I will wipe it with a tissue before. I sit down. >> My boyfriend of 3 years recently learned. this. >> when I made a passing comment about. sitting in a porta potty and he is. absolutely horrified. He is really grossed out that I have sex.
with him after sitting on a public. toilet seat. >> And he likens it to him wiping his dick. on the lid of a toilet seat or that he. is putting his mouth on people's poop. particles when he goes down on me. >> Wow. >> I asked a couple of friends and so far. the consensus is that I'm definitely the. gross one and I should always hover to. pee. >> Mhm. I feel like I'm going crazy. Am I. the [ __ ] for sitting on public. toilets? [laughter].
>> I appreciate the honesty. I never want. to shame anyone for being honest. You. know, >> I'm a messy girl myself. Okay. >> I didn't know I hadn't been doing the. laundry, for example, for the past seven. years and that it had been my husband. >> How did you get away with that? Like, can you please teach me? I don't know if. I got away with it because we had a big. conversation afterwards [laughter] and I. did get caught. >> Did he call Did he um call you up for. some like weaponized incompetence?
>> Um yeah, it was a de Look, it was a. devastating day for me too. Trust cuz I. thought I had been helping out this. whole time. >> Really? >> I thought I had been doing it too. >> Okay. >> Uh he and I found out because literally. I really thought I had been doing it. too. [laughter] But it was more like um. when you've seen you know when you've. seen someone do something so you think. oh that was me too. >> I also did that. >> only to realize like. >> like I asked him I went to the washing.
machine I looked at the buns and I. realized huh like I think I've I've. never touched these buns before and. that's how and but so I said Ryan Ryan. and I was like hey um I was like for a. load like this for like underweares what. would you say I should like put the. settings on. >> Uhhuh. >> And he was like and he he started. explaining cuz he's a he's a nice guy. So he was like, "Oh yeah." So uh I would. and then he goes, "Wait, [laughter].
have you not been doing he I saw him. doing the math. Have you not been doing. the laundry this whole time?" And it hit. me too. I was like, "Oh my god, I it has. been you this whole time." Anyway, so. I'm a messy girl. That's how we found. out. >> to my core. I'm the same. And I've, you. know, done like gross things before, too. In my 20s, I, you know, hooked up. with someone in a nightclub bathroom and. we rolled around on the ground on the. dirty ground. You know, >> on the ground, >> making out, going down on each other, too. >> See, I'm like, this is the lore.
>> Yeah. >> What? What? >> But I will say for like a whole year. after that, >> I never got sick. And so I will say that. you know this girl so this this is a. twisted twisted way if if I wanted to. >> Mhm. >> see things from her side. >> Yeah. >> Okay. Her immunity might be very strong. She may not have STDs or whatever. You. know I mean I don't think that's how you. get it is from uh toilet seat STDs.
>> Common myth. >> Okay. Common myth. But poop. Yes. But. she might be strong and um so at least. he's not getting at least he's not. getting ICDs from her. Maybe she's. showering before sex too. Like is she. she's not going straight from the. portaotty to is she getting horny right. after and then being like hey babe let's. have sex. You know I have questions. This fe this whatever you call it Reddit. story. >> Mhm.
>> has opened up more questions than. answers. >> What would you ask her if you could? Are. you having sex immediately with your. boyfriend after these toilets? You know. what I mean? >> Yeah. >> Then yeah, think about him. You know, then let's think about him a little bit. You know, have some compassion, empathy, wash your butt. But if you're just this. is how you want to live and then you're. showering before you have sex with him, I mean, I think he might be okay. See, I.
don't know if I've done this in a while, but I think back in the early days of. Two Hot Takes, we did a poll. >> Yeah. >> And we asked people like, "Are you a. sitter or are you a hovererer?". >> Oh, yeah. >> I'm a sitter. >> I'm a sitter, too. I put toilet paper. down at least. Yeah. >> You have like the little liners you can. put down. >> But it's actually really bad for you to. hover. >> Oh, it is? >> Yeah. It hurts your pelvic floor. It can. weaken your pelvic floor muscles. So, no. more super grip. >> Oh, yeah.
>> That's a problem. >> And allegedly coming from uh an Ohio. State medical center. >> Okay. >> Hovering over the toilet seat can lead. to UTI. >> Wow. >> You give yourself a UTI from hovering. >> Huh. Interesting. Yeah. I mean, I don't. know how long you're hovering for. Usually, I'll hover just to like. urinate. >> That's pretty fast. Yeah. Yeah, but when. you hover, you also push. >> to avoid the dribble.
>> Oh, is that right? >> Mhm. >> Oh, I guess that's true. Yeah. I haven't. hovered in a while. You know, there's in. Asia there's um a lot of restrooms too. that like you do squat for on the like. to the ground. >> Yeah. >> Is that hovering? Yeah. >> I feel like when you're doing that low. squat, it's more so like your body mechanics. Like I feel like when I did it different. than sitting. >> Yeah. You're kind of like. >> like standing. Yeah. >> Sitting upon your own legs in a squat. position. >> That's true. So that's still a seat.
>> You're somewhat relaxed. >> Yeah, that's true. Okay. Yeah. >> Yeah. >> So Okay. So, yes. Thank you. Hovering is. bad for you. So, you do want to at least. sit. >> Mhm. >> If you can, girl, try try the toilet. paper on the on the toilet seat. >> That's what I'm saying. Also, if he's. weird about this and he's going to be. like, I'm essentially eating people's. poop particles, take a shower. Just take a shower. >> Yeah. I would say like Yeah. shower. before you, you know, have sex. >> You'll be less spontaneous. Yeah. >> But as you said, you know, clean your.
ass, >> be good. >> Yeah. Don't go from the portaotty to. sex. >> Some people have sex in those things, too, though. >> Yeah. And you know, I there are people. where it's like, hey, you know, I I. can't help you. I can't. You know, you're going to live. What am I going to. Who am I? Your mom? I've tried. Okay. This is this is where where the advice. stops. You shower after you use the. ported party and then have sex. Okay? If. you have sex in a porta party, sweetie,
there's nothing more to say. You live, okay? Life is hard. >> Very. >> We have I don't know. The earth is how. many more years we have? >> I don't know. Some people think it's. flat, too. So, >> and I can't help them either. >> No. >> Maybe. So, keep at it, girl, and stay safe. That's. all I can say. Don't fall in. [laughter]. >> The tough comment on this one, not the. [ __ ] Hovering ladies are the ones.
who make the toilets dirty and. disgusting for the rest of us. >> Wow. Interesting. Yeah, >> that is true. >> Yeah, cuz like when you say, I guess it. is just your skin touching. >> I hate going into a public toilet though. and feeling that it's hot. >> Everything's so hard. Why does going to. the restroom a part of having to be a. human? >> I know, >> you know. >> I just I think about that all the time. Like why? >> I want to be like that's that that. part's gone. But I get to still eat.
somehow. That still works. >> We do have it better than some animals. though cuz like birds it's just like an. allin-one. >> Oh, what do you mean all in one? Oh, like they Oh, they urinate and um number. two at the same time. >> Just Is that what it is? >> Oh wow. >> I know. >> A bird pooped on me um a couple days. ago. Okay. So, that was two in one. >> It's good luck. >> They say that, but I didn't feel that. while it was happening to me and I had. to run to the hotel and then shower. again before I went back out. >> I Yeah. >> No.
>> While I was like getting it out and it. was like on my neck and back, I was. like, "Yeah, I don't feel like the good. luck part yet. >> It'll come. It'll come.". >> Yeah. Yeah. >> It'll come. Oh, man. Well, I hope we get. an update from this one. just like how. they solved this issue. I mean, worst. case, you're just not going to have sex. and then that's a lot less work for you. >> Yeah, totally. Yes. But thank you for. your honesty. >> I appreciate that. >> We need more of that in this world. >> This episode is brought to you by Billy.
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your razor stays dry on the wall instead. of sitting in a shower puddle. Been. guilty of that before. Grab a Billy. razor in your favorite color in store or. at mybilly.com. Okay, this next story is coming from Am. I the [ __ ]. >> again? >> Again. Wow, we love this sub. >> Yeah. Am I the [ __ ] Is it also like. something to do with the restroom? She's. like, it's not a pun. It was all pun. Am. I the [ __ ] I sit on my butt.
[laughter]. >> A very normal natural thing. [gasps]. Uh, it's titled, "Am I the [ __ ] for. taking a coloring book back from my. niece after she got attached to it? I, 27, female, live with my husband, 31, male. We've been married for about a. year and a half. Overall, things are. good, but we're still figuring out. boundaries, especially around our stuff. I collect Hello Kitty and Sonreo items. Nothing extreme, but I have a small.
display shelf in the living room and a. few related things on the bookshelf. Most of it is stuff that I've picked up. over the years. I fell in love with. Hello Kitty as a kid when I lived in. Japan. And after my family moved to the. US, I stopped seeing it around. So. collecting it now feels a little. nostalgic. Last year, I went back to. Japan to visit my grandparents and I. found these really nice Sono coloring. books. They're not like cheap kids ones. at the store. The paper is thicker, the. art is really detailed, and I bought.
them more as a nostalgic collectible. than something for random kids to use. This past weekend, we babysat his niece, six female, while his sister was out of. town. I was working from my home office, so he handled most of the child care. during the daytime. >> Uh-oh. >> Yesterday, on my lunch break, I saw her. looking at my shelf. She asked if she. could touch some of the figures. I said. yes, as long as she was very careful and.
put them back. I assumed she meant the. ones she could already reach, just the. figures she was asking about at that. exact moment. Later, I came out to grab. a snack and saw her coloring at the. table. >> Oh. >> At first, I thought it was a normal. coloring book, but then I realized it. was one of the ones I brought back from. Japan from my Hello Kitty shelf. M mm-. >> I didn't want to upset her, but I. thought I set pretty clear guidelines. and six seems old enough to understand.
that to me. I could be wrong, so I just. said, quote, "Maybe we find another book. for you to color in." She was really. into it, and my husband laughed and said. we should just let her keep it since she. already started coloring in it. I. quietly told him I'd rather not, and. that we could easily buy her a different. book. He brushed it off and said I was. overthinking it. I don't want to argue. in front of her, so I dropped it. That. night, after she went to sleep, I saw he. had packed the coloring book into her.
backpack. >> Oh. >> That bothered me because it felt like he. had decided to give it away something of. mine without even asking. >> Mhm. >> So, I took it out and shoved it under a. couch cushion. Lol. I know it seems. dramatic, but I don't know. I just knew. if I put it back on the shelf, it would. wind up back in her bag. The next. morning, she had a meltdown looking for. it. Crying, screaming meltdown. We.
explained when her mother came that she. had lost a coloring book we gave her. >> After they left, I put it back on the. shelf. He said that he was really. disappointed in me. M. >> said I was being petty and childish and. should have just let her keep it. I told. him it wasn't about the price. It was. about the fact that it was something I. brought back from Japan and it was a. part of my collection and he gave it. away without even asking. Now things are.
tense and I'm wondering if I overreacted. by taking it back. Am I the [ __ ]. Wow. This is 100% I'm on her side. [laughter]. >> Same. >> Yeah. I mean, boundaries were set, they. were broken. Like, if anyone is into. collectibles or there's like nostalgia, you know, you know, your belongings and. the things that mean something to you is. a big deal. I don't know if the husband. if the husband collects like Pokemon.
cards or like baseball cards, same. thing. >> Mhm. >> He would be upset. >> It really is the same thing. Do you. collect anything? I don't, but I get. nostalgia, especially since, you know, I. lived in Japan and I also was born in. Taiwan, but you know, I moved to the US. without wanting to move here and then I. got stuck here. So, I never got to say. goodbye to my friends there or my dad. and my stuff, my school. So, I know what. it's like to, you know, every time I'm. in Japan, I, you know, for me that.
connection is big cuz it's like now I. don't even have a Japanese passport. because when I became an American. citizen, I had to give up give that up. because Japan doesn't allow dual. citizenship. So, it's like slowly bits. of my Japanese identity got taken. >> Yeah. Really stripped from you. >> Yeah. And my Japanese language is not as. good too. So, it's like when I'm there, the things I get from there, the things. I'm able to salvage, my dad has found. some like childhood photos of mine that. I I really cherish those things, you.
know? It's not just a silly. >> silly Pokémon card or whatever. >> But I think that's similar with people. in collectibles, right? It's just. something that I don't know, they're. drawn to for a reason. >> I mean, they can bring you so much. happiness. It's like I don't know some. people they get a good collectible, a. good Lego set and like their depression. is cured. Like genuinely, it can really. make life meaningful and worth living. And so something like this when you have. a deep personal connection, I mean,
similar to what you're saying, it's like. you get these little bits and it's like. you're getting a part of yourself or a. part of your culture back. And. >> I would be really really upset with my. husband if he one he didn't ask me or if. he just like looked at something that. was so special to me. Mhm. >> as just like it's a coloring book. It's. like it it doesn't matter what that item. is, it's important to me. >> So therefore, by not caring about it, you're not respecting or caring about. me. >> Yeah. [clears throat] No. And. >> like I would take it personal.
>> Yeah. And it's like the six-year-old, they grow up and they get over things. I. mean, you know, I I'm a little a lot of. people probably won't agree with me, but. I'm I'm actually us I'm always on the. adult side when there's a kid in the. story. Is that That's so [ __ ] up to. say, but like. >> why. >> I don't I feel a lot for adults. >> I feel a lot for adults, >> senior citizens, kids. It's, you know,
I'm child-free and my husband also got a. vasectomy recently. We just knew from. the beginning. I just knew I just never. wanted kids. >> and that's fine. Kids are great for. other people. I like other kids people's. kids. I like the idea of kids, but you. know, I just feel like adults have had. to endure more. And so if they're like, you know, that's I was talking about. being a Disney adult, you know, and. people are like h so lame. It's like, "Of course I'm an adult at Disneyland. I.
couldn't come as a kid. I couldn't. afford it. I didn't have a job." Okay. Of course I'm an adult at Disney. I. finally have my brain is finally f fully. formed where I can [gasps] remember the. memories that I just made that I paid. for. You know what I mean? In a way, like going to Disneyland as an adult. makes more sense. And so, um, so that's. that's sort of my unhinged take with. it's like, you know, This is very. pessimistic.
>> Okay, >> last thing. >> I'm ready. >> A kid at six, he's like, you know, trying to make her feel good, and. >> she might hate him when she's 18. [laughter]. >> I mean, is she. >> and he's going to be like, "Oh, great. I. broke up with my wife over this coloring. book.". >> Yeah. >> You know, that's your life partner. This. girl might hate you tomorrow. >> She's six. >> Yes. >> She's not going to remember this. coloring book. She literally might hate. Hello Kitty in 2 days. >> I know. She's She's not going to respect.
the quality of this paper. >> She might grow up to be Marjgerie Taylor. Green. I don't know. >> You really don't know. >> These are literally literally things I. think when I meet an adult. When I meet. an adult, I'm like, "Well, you didn't. turn out to be Marjgerie Taylor Green.". So, yeah. Like, I want you to have this. coloring book. Is that messed up? >> No. I mean, she's six. very unlikely. This is this isn't going to be her. villain villain origin story. >> You never know, man. [laughter]. >> That's true.
>> You know, but yeah, it could be. It. could be. >> It could be. But unlikely. And again, it's not hers. It's not her [ __ ] It's. not a souvenir. She wants a little. coloring book. Go to. >> This isn't going to be her villain. story. You're right, though, cuz this is. not a hardship. >> that she went through. >> No. And the the screaming, the meltdown. Mhm. >> I think this is a good lesson that she. might need to learn. >> Yeah. >> This is actually a great opportunity. that she provided her. >> Listen, when someone goes, "Oh, only. touch these things." Listen.
>> Yeah. Keep your Grammy paws off. Top. comment. You should be really. disappointed in him. >> He gave away something that was. important to you without a single. thought. Someone else says, "I would be. locking up my collection after that.". That's the type of blatant disregard. that leads me to believe he would get. rid of her stuff. He knew she didn't. want him to give it away and tried to do. it anyways. What will he do after this. now that she had the gull to take it.
back? >> Yeah. Well, >> that's kind of a dark thought though. Like he's going to start retaliating and. just like burning the coloring books. >> Oh, you never know. Some [gasps] that. Yeah. >> Dark. >> Dark. >> What would you do if your husband gave. something of yours away? I mean, you're. you're a fashionista. >> Like, what if you just started giving. your clothes away? Like something that. you cherish, >> right? Yeah. I mean, yeah, that would be. I would be like confused like, you know, there's you're out to get me. [laughter]. You're mad or Yeah. What happened? You.
turned. You changed as a person. overnight. What happened? Is someone. else under there? [laughter]. >> I would try to peel his skin off. Be. like, "Oh, see, I knew it." You know, Scooby-Doo style. Uh-huh. >> Yeah. Another man, different man. >> Who [clears throat] replaced you? >> My former manager. I knew it. You know, whatever it is. >> OP does say that this is a very special. collector's edition. It was an $80. coloring book.
>> Mhm. >> So, it's like I'm not giving $80. coloring book to a six-year-old. >> No, no, no, no. >> There's no way. >> Six-year-old is happy playing with their. imagination. They. >> They should be. >> Yes. Kids need to learn how to be bored. again. >> Yes. >> I remember growing up and sitting at a. table without a tablet. >> and just being bored and like being okay. with being bored. >> Yeah. >> Going on car rides, looking out the. window. >> Like teach kids to be bored again. And. they need to learn how to self soothe a.
little better. >> Yeah. >> I'm not a parent. That's me talking out. of my ass. >> Hot take for the day. >> Oh, I think this Yes, I totally agree. >> But the tablets have gotten out of. control. The kids need to, you know, I I. used to just hang out with adults cuz I. was bored, you know. I learned how a. divorce works at three. What? Just. watch, you know, listening to other. people. My parents had already divorced, but like, you know, just being around. like another couple that was divorcing. I shouldn't have to I shouldn't know.
those terms. >> No, not at three. >> But I did cuz I didn't have a tablet. But. >> I turned out okay. >> Yeah. >> You grew up quick though. >> You're like, "Yes, you're okay." Yes, you did. Yes. Yes. >> Yes. Yes. Meanwhile, cut to I'm just at. California Disneyland Park every week. >> eating those beignetes. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> What's your go-to snack there? >> I uh So, my husband has celiac, so we do. um eat specific like But they do have a. gluten-free cookie that's um God, I know.
too much. Jack Jack's uh Jack Jack from. The Incredibles. >> He has a cookie uh collection there. One. of them is gluten-free. Anyway, we eat. that. >> That sounds good. So, no beignetes for. you. >> No, no, no. But that's fine. Oh, and the. turkey leg. >> Turkey leg's good. >> Turkey leg. Corn of the cob. >> Corn of the cob. Gluten-free. >> Yes. Yeah. >> Yeah, that's good. >> Mhm. >> Yeah. The chicken teriyak. They have a. gluten-free, too. >> Dole whip. >> uh as well. Yeah. Also gluten-free. Thank you. Yes. Yeah.
>> Okay. Yeah. You're you're still having a. good time. >> See how I lit up? It's because Yeah. I. was negotiating other people's divorces. at three, but. [snorts] you know, I can appreciate the. finer things in life. >> Hey, it gave you, you know, maybe a. little bit too quick of a childhood, but. it led to you being able to. >> to being stunted. >> No, no, [laughter]. you are just like. >> the joys in life. >> You're just an old soul. Well, and like. I was trying to think of ways to like. explain you and I feel like maybe this. isn't how you feel, but you feel to me.
like you've just lived like 10 different. lives already in like such a short time. >> based on everything that you've gone. through and all of your experiences and. stuff. >> Right. Right. Yeah. Yeah. >> So, I'm like I don't know. Life, you. know, it's just I don't know. It's not. easy for everybody. And so people come. out with these stories and then come out. the other end and I feel like you've. come out the other end and like it's. really just enabled you to be this. amazing comedian because of it. >> Oh, thank you. >> You're so good. I'm like everyone needs.
to go watch. >> But children are suspectful of me and. suspectful. Is that a word? >> Yeah. [gasps]. >> Children don't trust me. >> Really? They're a little apprehensive of. you. >> because they know I'm trying to give. their coloring book back to the adult. Or maybe they just like can sense that. you like you clock them like you know. what I mean? >> I clock them also. I think some of them. think I am a baby too. Like some babies. are like what? Cuz of my haircut. They're like is she our leader? You know.
I they look at me like that when at the. airport they're like hold on wait. Uh. why does she get to walk around without. her parents? They look at me like that. >> Oh my gosh. Are you kind of a baby. whisperer? >> A little bit. I'm not trying to be. They. think I'm a Teletubby for real. Yeah, for sure. Like you you're like they're. like they you know they're like what is. this? Is that Dora the Explorer? Cuz I. wear a backpack too. >> They're like what what is happening? >> They're drawn to you. >> Yeah. >> You're a baby baby magnet. >> Yes. And I'm like be careful. I will.
give your coloring book back to the. rightful owner. >> Speaking of stealing things. >> Yes. >> This story is confusing me. >> Oh, okay. This is coming from our two. hot takes subreddit. It's titled, "My. husband is stealing my clothes and I. don't know why.". >> Oh, okay. All right. I have some ideas. >> I, 28, female, have been married to my. husband, 26, male, for almost 4 years.
now. I have a metabolic disorder that I. was born with that causes me to have. severe depression. Even though I try to. be very health consscious, it is very. hard for me to care about my life at. times and in turn causes me to not care. about my appearance. So when I like. clothing, it's a really big deal for me. I recently got a shirt that I really. love. It's kind of an oversized, which. is how I like it. And it is in that. style that I like. I showed it to my. husband and he claimed to like it, too.
>> It's a very casual shirt, but I really. like it and I wear it often. About a. month ago, I went to put it on, but I. couldn't find it anywhere. I knew I had. just done laundry, so it couldn't have. gone far. I tore the house apart looking. for that shirt. Nothing. >> The following morning, I was driving. with my husband and I saw the shirt I. was looking for in the back of his car. >> Oh. >> When I asked him why it was in there, he. said he didn't know and was confused,
but I just let it go. A couple of weeks. ago, I had gotten another shirt that I. fell in love with. This one also casual. and oversized, but I loved it so much I. bought another one in a different color. I again showed them to my husband and he. claimed he liked them. >> Same thing happened. I went to go put. one on and realized that both of them. were missing. >> Oh. >> I again tore the house apart looking for. them, but nothing. I had remembered the.
other one being in my husband's car. So, when he got off of work, I went to see. if they were in there. >> What? >> And I found them in the trunk. >> So, they're all in the trunk. He's just. collecting them in the trunk. >> Like little victims. He's just kidnapping shirts. But hers. >> along with several other clothing items. I had that went missing. >> Oh. I got back inside and asked him why. he had a bag of my clothes in his car.
>> He denied knowing what I was even. talking about. So, I showed him the. footage of our Ring camera with him. holding the bag of clothes. >> and walking to his car. He then said, quote, "Oh, yeah. I'm pretty sure you. told me you wanted to donate that. stuff." which I then proceeded to tell. him, "I've never asked him to donate any. of my stuff. If I have clothes to. donate, I always sort and take them. myself." He then just said, quote,
"Yeah, I don't know then.". >> Oh, every time I bring it up, he just. says he just thought he was supposed to. take them to the donation center, which. I'm 100% certain I never asked him to. do, especially because he was taking all. of my favorite things. How do I proceed. with this if he won't even tell me the. real reason he's taking my clothes? >> That's really wild. >> I'm scared. I'm actually kind of scared. >> Yeah, it's like kind of serial killer. activity because, you know, it's like.
he's practicing on shirts, you know, what could be humans. I mean, he's. putting them in bags and lying, you. know, and it's in the trunk. >> in You're right. >> That's where you put victims. You are. you're so right. I mean, next step is, you know, take them, you know, and uh I mean, he is taking. them, I guess, and then and then being. like, I don't know what you're talking. about. Yeah. It's wild. And, you know,
but and it's weirder because it's stuff. he knows she likes because she's showing. them being like, I love these. >> I know. Which is so sad. Unless he. doesn't like them and he's trying to get. rid of them so that what? She has to. wear different kinds of clothes or what? You know, that's my guess. None of it's. good. >> None of it's good. My first thought was. he's taking them to wear them himself. >> That was my first thought, too. And I. was going to be like, you know, maybe. Yeah, exactly. >> But then why are they in the trunk in a.
bag? You know, you hear the stories. about people coming home and finding. their husband in their underwear and. stuff like that. So, it's like if he was. going to take them and wear them, you. think they'd be in the house where he. could actually get them on? >> Yeah. I think he's literally trying to. get rid of them. I feel like you need to. start if you have two cars. If you have. a car each, I would start doing it with. his clothes, too. But you got to you got. to. >> retaliate. >> Yes, you got to beat him, though. You. have to It has to be like a lot at a. time. He's he's got three shirts so far.
in this story. Take his whole closet, put it in your trunk. >> I like this. And then don't get rid of them yet, but. like have him, you know, question where. they went. You know, >> I donated them. I thought I thought you. wanted them donated. >> Yes. When he says, "No, no, no. I I like. these clothes. Donate them anyway.". >> Yeah, I liked my clothes, too. >> That's That's my thought. And then. probably break up with him still, too. >> That's my thought. >> Well, they're married, too. It's like.
>> I'm going to eat one of these. chocolates. This is stressing me out. >> I know. Say. >> this man just lives in this world. We. breathe the same air. >> It's scary, isn't it? >> He's 28. >> 26. >> 26. >> Kind of a diabolical age for a dude. >> He needs to go back in the womb, cook a. little more. More diabolical. >> Diabolical. >> What does that word mean? I actually. don't know. >> I'm going to give us the formal. definition. >> Oo, fun. Thank you. >> Diabolical refers to something highly. devious, extremely cruel, or.
characteristic of the devil. 26 is that? Yeah, because that's still. very young. So, his metabolism is going. He's got a lot of energy. 26 year olds. heal fast. He's already thinking this. way. Next step is like mutilating. squirrels. You know what I mean? I don't know the solution, but my thing. is do his clothes too. First step at.
least. Sorry, I'm trying not to chew in. the mic. No, [laughter] everyone's going. to appreciate that. Oscar, you just like. you're just taking it to the level that. like I usually would and I'm just I'm so. happy you're here that I'm just like not. alone in this. The top comment, he's. taking what makes you feel good about. yourself. If it makes you happy, he. can't stand it. >> That's a good point. He can't stand it. Yeah, >> that's like. >> that's not a good husband though or a. person. No, that's not someone I would.
trust to be my person. Like, you tell. him you like a shirt. I like this shirt. It makes me feel good. And his next step. is to take it not once, not twice, more. than three times cuz he's got the three. shirts and a bag of other stuff you've. been missing. Like, he is he's insane. >> Jail. Yeah. Prison jail now. >> Yeah. >> Mhm. So, we do get an update.
>> Oh my god. Okay. I hope it's good. >> I am pleased to say this was not the. update I was expecting to make. >> Oh. >> I gathered the footage again and I. showed my husband the video recording of. him carrying my clothes in the bag to. his car. He looked at the footage and. said, quote, "Okay, I'll just tell you. I don't want you to think I'm a horrible. husband." Oh, >> it turns out that he was taking my. clothes to surprise me with a photo. shoot, wearing all of my favorite.
clothing items. >> What? >> So then I would feel good and. comfortable in the photo shoot. >> What? Where? Okay. He said, quote, "I. know you are battling a lot mentally, and I wanted you to have these photos to. look at when you are feeling down about. yourself and to remember how beautiful. you are." That made me tear up. I then. asked why he gaslit me when I saw the. clothes in his car and why he didn't.
just tell me. He said he really wanted. it to be a surprise because he knows. it's hard for mentally most days to get. out of the house. He said he was just. bad at hiding the clothes and didn't. know where else to put them but in his. car. >> Wow. >> He also apologized multiple times for. gaslighting me and said he should have. handled that part in a different way, but couldn't think of anything else in. the moment when he was put on the spot. I told him I forgave him, but if this. ever happens again, I won't be so.
forgiving next time. And he completely. understood and said there will be no. next time. I then asked him why he took. the clothes ahead of time and not just. take them right before the photo shoot. He said his memory is so bad, >> which is true. He has the memory of a. goldfish. Oh, >> okay. >> And a lot of my clothes look so similar, so he wasn't sure he would remember. which ones were my favorite. So, he took. them periodically when I would tell him. how much I liked them so he wouldn't.
forget. M. >> I then proceeded to hug him and tell him. that that was the sweetest thing anyone. has ever done for me. And I apologized. for thinking he was being cruel to me on. purpose. I honestly should have known it. would be something like this because he. has always been such a good man, but I. started to question because of my. relationships in my past. But he clearly. is not like all the boys in my past. I'm. so thankful to have a good man. The. photo shoot appointment is tomorrow and. I'm actually really excited. I've never. had a professional photo shoot before.
Thank you to everyone who commented with. their support. I know that every comment. comes from a place of love and concern, and it was healing to read how much. people care. I hope you all have a. wonderful week. Take some cute photos of. yourself. We all deserve to be reminded. of our beauty. >> Wow, that's it's not fair how much acts. of kindness is just just borderline. Just a fine line before you're looking. like a mass shooter. It's just [ __ ].
up. It's so messed up. [sighs and snorts]. Like, you know what I mean? >> Like, when a stranger hugs you, it's. like, oh, it's like a act of kindness or. like he's about to, you know, stab you. It's It's messed up. >> I see. >> I got tricked. I got tricked. I was two. seconds ago. I was telling her, you. know, steal his clothes, burn it down, get rid of them, break up with him. I. mean, I don't know if I'm convinced.
>> that there's a photo shoot happening. tomorrow. >> Uhuh. >> I want to see these photos. >> I would like to see photos, OP. This is. on our own subreddit. Like, this is. likely one of our listeners. >> Yeah. >> So, >> we would love an update. I'm glad you. feel beautiful. I want you to feel. beautiful. >> As you should. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> As you absolutely should. Yeah, >> I'm going to need documentation that. this photo shoot was booked before you. confronted him. >> Yeah, cuz Yeah. Yeah, that's a great.
idea. >> Was this a cover up? >> Yeah, I do. >> Was this a cover up? >> Yeah, because you got us cuz cuz if this. is for a photo shoot, his tactic is a. little wild. He's acting like a dog. covering like stealing a piece of bone. from the dinner table. Yeah. you know, and hiding in a hole in the backyard one. at a time. You know, you're you're. acting like like a like a squirrel. before hibernation. He has a brain of a goldfish suddenly. I.
don't know. >> I'm not convinced. But what does that. say about me? Am I just being. pessimistic? Am I. >> No, it's the the way of the world. >> Am I something broken within me? Do I. have trust issues? I just find this no. >> I find something's still a little off. here. >> I'm going to need another update. OP, >> nothing's broken with you. Ted Bundy. used to lure his victims into his car by. being pretending he he was on crutches.
and that he needed he had like a broken. arm and he needed help putting something. in his car and out of the goodness of. people, you know, and that's how he. would take advantage of them. So, no, you're not broken. >> Thank you. Thank you. I needed that. confirmation. [sighs and gasps]. top comment. They quote OP, "I'm so. thankful to have a good man." And they. share the meme of Pete Davidson kind of. like, >> "Oh, kind of tearing up. >> Tearing up." Like, >> I can't tell what that emotion is.
supposed to convey, though. >> I'm not really sure either. >> Oh, maybe that's like Pete Davidson. saying that like I'm so thankful to have. a good man. I don't know. Like he like. she's literally I have no idea. >> I know. Is it like like girl we don't. believe that or like is that like oh. that's so sweet like I'm choking up it. that's a very difficult face to. interpret. >> Yeah. Yeah. In this case and this is one. of the few cases where I would say girl. use your words. Use your words because.
you know right now I can't use more. abstractness. I'm confused. Same people are sharing. >> Shaken that she is still with him and. now she's just doing a photo shoot. >> I need pictures. You can send I won't. share them. >> Send them to me. >> I just want proof of life. >> Thank you. >> That's all. >> Proof of life. Um a lot of people share. memes like the Britney Spears meme. That. one's a little more easy to understand. >> Yeah, totally. Right.
>> Yep. Someone says, "My and my husband's. reaction when we read this, like I don't. want to be mean, but girl, come on.". >> Mhm. Mhm. >> Someone says, "Oh, honey." So, I think I. think I'm not in the solo boat of still. skeptical. >> Yeah. I think, you know, the lesson is. that, you know, boys weren't always. taught to communicate and um. we need to make sure they learn from an.
early age. >> Yeah, I think so. How you doing? How you hanging over. there? >> Good. >> Doing okay. >> Yeah, I'm just being whipped around by, you know, these um these men. [laughter]. >> Wow. [sighs]. >> Well, do you have a dog? Do you have any. pets? >> I don't. Uh, we tried fostering for a. month. Yeah, we had a dog for a month. >> How'd it go? >> We were not prepared. We were confused.
We didn't do uh research. We didn't, you. know, read anything. We just thought. >> we thought like having a dog was like a. vibe. Like you just kind of. >> you feed it, give it water, it'll poop. We didn't know. We were surprised. We. didn't know. Didn't We were like, "Why. did it poo again?" You know, we were It. poos every day. like. >> multiple. Do they d I think multiple. like twice a day? >> More and more than its body size. I.
don't know [laughter] if it was. something was wrong with this dog. >> What were you feeding it? >> Do all dogs poop more than its body. size? Cuz we would wake up and the back. >> What kind of dog was this? >> It was a like a pitbull lab mix. >> Okay. >> Bigger dog. But we would wake up to the. backyard just filled with poop. And we. were like, "Did did you have friends. over?" We were so confused. >> Oh my god. >> And uh and it was getting bigger and. bigger by the minute. >> The dog or the.
>> the dog and the poop. >> Oh my god. All of our stuff was wet all. the time. We were just [gasps]. Everything was like day one on Earth. We. We were not ready. We were so confused. [laughter] We were like, "I thought a. dog's supposed to help you. what you know. Yeah. We were getting. weaker and the dog was getting stronger. >> Yeah. And when they learn that they're. smarter than you, >> that's when things get really scary. >> Oh my god. At one point we we just be. hiding in a corner like the dogs.
outsmarted us. This is the dog's house. now. And uh [laughter] so yeah, we we're. not Yeah. >> Okay. >> Mhm. >> So you do have a little experience on on. a dog that you know kind of takes over. Yeah. Yeah. Also, no one told me I'd be. thinking about the dog all the time, too. Like when I'd be out at a bar, I. was like, "Oh, I I didn't know this was. No one told me. It's too easy to adopt. or foster." This next one coming from. relationship advice. It's titled, "My.
girlfriend, 25 female, is ruining years. of my dog's training and thinks I, 27. male, am being a dictator.". I have a 5-year-old German Shepherd. named Max. I got him as a pup and spent. literally hundreds of hours and a lot of. money on professional training because I. wanted a dog that actually listens. He. used to be perfect, heal, stay, no.
begging at the table, the whole deal. We've been living together for about 7. months now, and things are starting to. fall apart because she refuses to follow. the rules I set for him. It started. small, like her letting him on the couch. when I'm not in the room. I told her. multiple times that Max has his own bed. for a reason, and it is better for his. joints and my sanity because of the fur. She just rolls her eyes and says that he.
looks sad. Now he won't even go on his. bed when I tell him to because he just. looks at her for permission to stay on. the sofa. >> Then there is the food. I have a very. strict no scraps rule. She thinks it's. cute to give him bits of her pizza crust. or bacon under the table. Oh, >> now Max has started whining and pawing. at people while they eat, which is. something he never did before. Yesterday.
was the breaking point. I caught her. feeding him directly from her plate. And. when I told her to stop, she got. defensive and called me a dog dictator. She says I am sucking the joy out of his. life and that he is just a dog, not a. soldier. I tried explaining that. consistency is the only way training. works and that she's basically undoing 3. years of hard work, but she didn't care. She just walked away. Now the dog is. confused and honestly starting to ignore.
my commands if she's around. How do I. make her understand that this is about. respect for my effort and the dog's. safety without turning it into a massive. fight every single night? M dang, that's. a Yeah, [sighs]. that's a hard one because Yeah, I I get. needing to train a dog since we didn't. know how to train a dog. It was messy. We couldn't do it. We couldn't figure it. out. So, like if someone did the hard. work of figuring it out, Yeah. I would.
want that to be kept, too. You know, >> what did what did this dog do to your. house and stuff? We would like I would. start running and she would chase me and. then jump up and like bite me playfully. And I thought that was cute. And so I. would put it on Instagram and people. would be like, you know, you're supposed. to stop her from doing that, [laughter]. you know. I'm like, oh, I didn't know. Right. But it's messy. You know, it's. she would like run around the house. My. husband, you know, my husband has ADHD. and like I think I do too. I haven't. like gone to like get diagnosed. my fans.
have diagnosed me. But, you know, it's. hard for us to like get stay organized. and already on top of things. So, yeah, just seeing that the dog was just being. a dog because of the way we are. >> Yeah. I get if you were able to. discipline and it's I know it's. expensive to get a trainer and stuff. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. I would want someone to respect. that too, for sure. >> I'd be pissed. >> Yeah. >> I'd be upset. Like it's it's it's going. to be even more difficult too down the.
road because like this is the dog. What. happens if we progress further and. >> I don't know what if they want kids and. they have a kid. >> and she's like I don't care. I'm an a. gentle parent and that kid can climb all. over everyone in a store or. >> right ultimately the the thing behind. her attitude is I don't care about like. your feelings and your hard work and. what matters to you. Right? That's what. she's saying. I don't care what matters. to you. It's not about the dog. necessarily. I mean, it is right now,
but below the surface, right? That's. what's happening. She's going, I don't. respect you. >> You can't be with someone who doesn't. respect you. >> Yeah. So, yeah, cuz then she's It sounds. like they live together, right? Yeah. >> Yeah. 7 months. >> She's really, you know, done some. serious damage in that time. Top. comment. Your girlfriend is being. disrespectful. Imagine what it would be. like to have kids with her. Do yourself. a favor and find someone who respects. you and your dog.
>> OP, the the person who wrote the post. comments back, "The kid thing is. actually a scary thought if we can't. even agree on a dog. Parenting would be. a disaster.". >> Mhm. Right. >> We do have a bunch of dog trainers that. chime in in the chat. >> Oh, yeah. >> Yeah. They say it might be worth setting. an ultimatum and strict corrective. action in front of your dog where the. dog can see the rules are being set. For. example, the next time she feeds your. dog scraps from the plate, you. intervene. If you have other issues in.
your relationship, worth a mend. I don't. know, maybe just call it quits, >> right? Yeah, that's that's all about. that. That's kind of what I I would say, too. >> I think so, >> cuz I don't know. I mean, pizza crust is. like bad for the dog, too. know. >> that's it can hurt their stomachs. >> Yeah. Yeah. I think I've. >> then they're really going to be pooping. big poops. >> I heard German Shepherds have like very. sensitive stomachs too or like they get. like they have I don't know. >> My German Shepherd was like really prone.
to allergies from Oh, okay. >> Yeah. And like he had sensitive skin. >> Oh, yeah. >> He was kind of a high maintenance boy. >> Yeah. Well, I mean, but I'm pretty sure. they do have like stomach issues and. either way, you don't want to mess with. that. That's That's so Yeah. >> No, >> that's not right. >> Mm-m. Okay. This next one for us is. coming from my friend Direct Caterpillar. 77. >> Oo. >> My Reddit besty who finds all the best. stories. >> It's titled, "My boyfriend blames me for.
a business deal gone wrong because he. was rude to me. My boyfriend Derek owns. a bunch of businesses. A few days ago, he wanted me to meet with a. representative of a restaurant chain in. order to acquire one of the stores. Derek invited Alex, the representative, to have dinner with us at a fancy. restaurant. Things were going well, and. when Derek left for the bathroom, Alex. and I began to talk. Alex told me his. family was originally from Russia, and I.
told him that my father trained in the. Russian army. When Derek came, I was. talking to Alex about a good borched. recipe. Derek, for some reason, thought. I was annoying Alex and told me, quote, "Alex came here to talk about business, not some dumb Russian soup.". [clears throat]. >> And then said, "Sorry about that, Alex. She talks a lot about useless. antidotes.". >> Oh, yeah. I got red in the face and Alex.
said, quote, "Well, Derek, I care about. dumb Russian soup because I'm Russian. Things were awkward." And long story. short, Derek didn't get approved for the. franchise and now he's blaming me for. it. >> I feel guilty and I don't know what to. do. >> Whoa. Yeah. I don't know. I feel like um. you just brought messiness to a business.
meeting. He's the one that kind of made. it weird and messy and personal and. attacky. >> Attacky indeed. >> For no reason. >> All he had to do is be like, "Oh, you're. into the soup." Sometimes I get confused. about why people. will date or be friends with their. biggest hater. M that is hard. Sometimes. we date, you know, what we know, right? And sometimes what we know is like our.
upbringing, whether it's like our. parents or whoever we wanted to please, and so we just do that again, right? >> Oh, I was a fixer for a long time. I. tried to fix them. >> Mhm. >> And I think, you know, my mom had a. really rough track record. >> of that. >> Yeah. Yeah. And like still like she has. not found the love that she deserves for. how amazing she is. >> And so growing up it was like I didn't. have a lot of great relationship. examples.
>> Yeah. >> So I fell into that. >> Right. Yeah. >> But like you get to a point where you're. like I'm really tired of my partner. making me feel like [ __ ]. >> Yeah. >> And hating on me. >> and being attacky. >> like [laughter]. >> Yeah. And this is my fault again, you. know. >> Yeah. Yeah. Totally. And so I mean she. doesn't have to feel guilty I would say. >> Um that's something she could get rid. of, you know, that that that feeling and. know that.
Yeah. know that that was definitely not. her fault. >> No. >> Um. >> what would your advice be for her going. forward? >> Oh gosh. And so like he's the one that. owns all these businesses. I mean, yeah, if he continues like this, if this is. like something that's behavior that's. common for him, yeah, I would, you know, think about you and whatever that means. If it's like leaving, then you know, you. just put yourself number one. It feels. like you even going her going to the.
meeting with him, right? It's like she's. so on his a supportive figure to him. >> Yeah, >> absolutely. >> Who's the supportive figure for her? So, you know, she should be that for her if. just think of you right now. Yeah, >> it's a really good point. You're showing. up for him. >> Yeah. >> Helping him smoo and. >> totally. >> try to lock up this deal. >> Mhm. >> What is he doing for you? >> Totally. Yeah. Yeah. >> Top comment. Nah. This is all on him for.
assuming that the conversation wasn't. going well and that it was your fault. If he was smart, he should have just. joined the convo and found a more. natural and less douchy way to move it. back to business. Your boyfriend sounds. like a dick. >> Yeah, totally. >> OP responds, he has a habit of thinking. that whenever I'm talking to someone, they're annoyed by me. >> Oh, yeah. That's not good. Yeah. So, this is a common thing. So, no, she. needs to think of you. You think of you,
girl, and maybe leave if you need to. M. Have you ever been with someone or like. been friends with someone that you just. can tell that they think you're stupid? >> Yeah, 100%. Yeah, >> those are bullies actually. >> That feeling or like they're constantly. just trying to like you'll say something. >> and it feels like you're talking in a. different language where they're like, "What do you mean?" And you have to like. overly explain yourself or like they. just don't give you the benefit of the. doubt.
>> Life is too short to deal with that. [ __ ]. >> Yeah. Oh, yeah. 100%. >> Hell no. >> My mom has schizophrenia. It's already. solving a puzzle every single day when. she calls me at 3:00 in the morning, 4. in the morning. When I have 50 missed. calls from her, I don't have time for. someone being like, "Why are you smiling. like that? Why' you say that? What. question does that mean?" No, I don't. Yeah, truly don't have time. >> It makes me nauseous. Like, let me live. my [ __ ] life. >> Yeah, totally. >> Just let me live. >> Yeah. Huh? Why are you.
>> Also, you don't like me, so you know. >> that I'm just You actually kind of hate. me. >> You hate me? >> Yeah. Yeah. So, okay. We don't need to. Let's not hang out. >> Mm-m. >> Let's [clears throat] not be with each. other. >> We do get an update. >> Oh my gosh. From her. >> From her. >> Oh, let me guess. He was trying to set. up a nice photo shoot [laughter] because. he's actually truly madly in love with. her. And this was not a restaurant guy. It was actually a photographer they were. meeting. What was it? [laughter]. >> After what happened, I started to.
reflect on our relationship as a whole. >> Oh, >> I noticed the trend that whenever I. talked to someone, Derek would always be. hovering over me. Not just business. partners, but his family, too. And. during events, also him insulting me for. what I would say was a trend that I. didn't really notice until now. Mhm. I. told Dererick about this in a last. attempt to salvage our relationship. because he still had some redeeming. qualities. I told Dererick I was. thinking of breaking up with him because.
he didn't respect me. Derek claimed that. I wouldn't break up with him because I. needed his money. M. >> and I pointed out that I come from an. upper middle class family and that I'm. studying to become an RN, so I don't. need anything from him but his respect. That's all I want. >> Derek then broke down and told me that. he grew up seeing his father putting his. mother down all the time. Derek said, "If I don't have any of my own opinions,
and I rely on him for everything, then I. won't leave." Apparently, that's what. his father taught him. I don't know. M. >> I broke up with Derek. >> Yay. Here you go, girl. >> And I blocked him and I changed my phone. number after he threatened to ruin my. life and tell the university awful. things about me. >> Oh, good. Good for you, girl. Yes. No. one's going to believe him. >> That guy they met with didn't believe. him. That's why he didn't work for him. with him. >> He saw his true color.
>> None of us believe him. >> Mm-. >> No. >> No. Icky icky icky icky. >> Yes. Oh my gosh, >> I don't like it. >> So glad it wasn't a photo shoot, though. I would have literally lost my mind. Like, I don't know anything anymore. >> He was secretly writing me poetry. >> He actually loves me. >> What? Yeah. >> No. >> Yeah. Oh, thank goodness. >> I'm going to give you a choice on our. last one here. >> Okay. >> You can either choose a feelgood happy. story titled My Husband Made Me Cry.
Tonight. >> Mhm. Or is it unreasonable to treat. masturbation as cheating? >> Oh. Um gosh, let's try feel good. Yeah. Everything's been so insane. >> I know. >> Where it's like he he was he wasn't. They're all Riddler. They're they're all. dating the Riddler. So maybe this this. one. >> This will be nice. >> Okay. >> This is coming from True Off my chest. It's titled My Husband made me cry.
tonight. I was cooking our dinner, which. I do every night because I love cooking. and I accidentally burned the pork. burgers. >> I didn't mean to, but I got distracted. trying to make the sides. I felt so. defeated trying to open windows to get. the smoke out, and my husband walked in. the kitchen and just stared at me. >> I just looked at him like, I don't know. what to do. He walked over, kissed me on. the forehead, and told me he appreciates. me cooking dinner for him every night. >> Oh. He told me we can scrape the burned.
part off. No harm, no fowl. And he was. so excited to eat the dinner that I. made. I burst into tears. >> What? >> He's the most loving, caring, and kind. human I know. And the little things like. tonight just make me so happy to have. him. I grew up with a mom that blew up. about everything. And my husband heals. that part of me that feels like I can't. do anything right. >> He's truly my favorite person. That's. all. Nothing major, but I wanted to get.
it out there. >> Oh my gosh, that's very sweet. And I was. gonna I was curious what happened to her. that made her like burst into tears like. that, right? Like. >> this reminds me of like when I was in So. when I was in Montreal, I performed in. Montreal as part of my tour and uh I got. a video um of my fan filming like his. partner uh who was crying. this Asian.
this Asian guy, he's crying. He's. crying. He's like, and his partner's. like, "Why are you crying?" And he's. like, "Why are you crying?" He's like, he goes, "Is it because I got you. tickets to go see your favorite?" And. he's like, and he goes, "She's Asian.". And he's crying, right? It was so sweet. And they were, and I was talking about. it at my show. I said it's very sweet, but also I was like, "What is wrong with. Montreal. [laughter]. that this boy is crying?" He's like,
"She's Asian." Like, representation. should not hit that hard. >> It does though. >> But not that hard. One one [ __ ] is one. Asian person is coming. He's like, "She's Asian." But I was like, "Some I. was like, "White people of Montreal, I'm. going to need you to walk a little. softer tonight. [laughter]. whatever you did this to this to this. poor Asian kid that he's just just one. Asian girl is coming and you're just. like ah I can't believe it you know I. mean and yes representation does get.
hard but. >> you know for her to burst into tears. after she cooks every night. >> and just like just barely a little. something gets burnt for her to react. that way my next question was going to. be like okay who the [ __ ] [ __ ] you up. >> because. >> I know the bar is is low or. >> you know what I Yeah. >> Who did this to you? >> Yeah. >> Right. And Yeah. The mom being like. forcing her to be a perfectionist. I. totally Yeah. So, it's great she has a.
partner that like offsets that. >> Sees her. >> Yeah. >> And like finding someone that like. finally sees you. Oh, such a good. feeling. I remember when I first started. dating my husband, >> I like was telling a friend something. And I was like, "Damn, is this what it. feels when someone actually likes you?". >> I'm like, "The effort they put in, the. amount they care about you.". >> Mhm. >> Just like really hits different, but. >> that's really that's really really cute. that that person surprised their partner.
with the tickets. >> Oh, yeah. >> Cuz like you you're like one of only two. female Asian comedians really to like. make it big, right? I saw some stat on. something. We have like uh oh um the. second Asian American uh female standups. to have a HBO special. >> Yes. Which is a huge deal. >> Yeah. Yeah. The first one was Margaret. Cho and it was 27 years between. >> between us. Yeah. >> Absolutely insane.
>> Yeah. But there's a lot, you know, there's there's more of us now. But. before, you know, like Margaret Tro was. the first one for and the only one for. so long, you know, meeting her, you. know, I I like super freaked out, too. And I was like, wait, it shouldn't be. this way. You know what I mean? Like, it's good. It's like, of course, because. it does matter to feel seen, but it's. like, man, I'm freaking out too much. Like, [laughter]. >> you know, there should be more of us. >> Yeah. It shouldn't be this. hit that.
hard. Yeah, >> exactly. >> Well, I feel like you're breaking a lot. of glass ceilings. >> Oh my gosh. >> Your work is absolutely incredible. >> Thank you. >> Really appreciate you coming on. >> Thank you for having me. And um I ate. one of the chocolates, but you can have. the rest back. >> I'm really excited for the caramel. I'm. like I'm just I'm. >> And that one I saved for you cuz I just. ate the almonds. >> I'm going to attack it right after this. Where can people find you? Where can. they watch? I mean, you've got your HBO. special. You've got your Hulu special.
You're on tour. >> Yes. Yes. Yes. >> The Big Bowl tour. >> Mhm. Yeah. So, people can find me on. oatskcomdy.com orco comedy on all my. socials. Yeah. And find me in your city. >> All of links will be in the description. Super easy to find. I know. I'm going to. find a show that I can make because I'm. I just need to see you live. Thank you. guys for being here another episode. Until next time. >> Bye. >> bye.
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