Biggest Opp Reddit Stories! || Two Hot Takes Podcast

I will tell you right now, if we get to. a million subscribers on YouTube before. we hit 300 episodes, >> I will do a 10hour episode for episode. 300. >> Oh my god. >> You get me to a million subscribers on. YouTube before we hit episode 300. >> When is that? >> It's coming up. >> How many? >> So, the countdown begins, guys. this. episode, this biggest op. I know you're.

going to do it with like multiple people. and like chop it all up and stuff, but I. just got the vision of just us locking. ourselves in a room for like 10 hours. and just going delirious. I could give. you 5 hours. Okay, so episode 300. is pretty soon actually. I think it'll. be before the end of 2026 because this. episode will be 289. Okay, >> so you have 11 episodes to get it to a. million on YouTube.

>> You'll get 10 hours. >> This is great gamification. I like this. is like tell all of your friends. >> Tell your friends. >> Yeah, >> tell your friends. Tell your mom. Tell. your grandma. Whoever's got a YouTube. channel. >> Wait, you're brilliant. >> I just want my plaque. Like I've worked. really hard. >> I just want my plaque. I want my. present. >> I just want my present. So yeah, that's. that. This is going to be a really good. episode. I'm really excited. We've got. Lauren here. Welcome to the pumpkin. patch, Lauren. >> It is pretty wild and with this. This is. You were You were not joking around.

>> I was not messing around. I said this. spooky Halloween September October vibe. I'm I'm hitting it hard. Do you like. keep this stuff in a storage or how do. you handle this or did you buy all this. recently? This guy looks familiar. We. know this guy. >> He's brand new. >> He's brand new. >> Yeah. For those listening, it is a. ginormous pumpkin figure. He is, I. believe, 46 or 48 in tall and he like. comes out of the ground and has arms.

that extend everywhere. >> Did you not have someone just like him. like last year? >> I had a skeleton dog. Oh, that's that. was it. Skeleton dog. >> Yeah, pumpkin patch is a new theme this. year. >> Okay. >> I really wanted to mix it up. Go big, not home. And um yeah, here we are. >> I love that. I know. I really like it. I'm excited to to show you guys cuz this. might be the first episode you guys see. the spooky the spooky patch. >> Yay. >> I know, Morgan. I don't think I've ever.

heard anyone say go big, not home, which. is so shocking to me, but I love it. >> It's go big or go home, but like I'm not. going home. I'm going big. It's not an. option. >> But that's why I'm like, why have I not. heard that before? >> Might have happened for the first time. just here. >> Just now. >> Would love that. >> Right here. Right now. That is like a. stem in my head constantly. But I'm just. really excited to get into this episode. This is a concept I've been toying with. for a while. And have you heard the.

phrase biggest op? Yeah. Yeah. What What. do you feel like it is to you? What does. it mean to you? Honestly, we have a. friend who says it about things that are. always funny, like a dog that's like. barking at another dog. So, that's what. I think of, but I know that it's uh it's. much bigger than that. a lot more um angst to it. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> So, for those that haven't heard the. term before, biggest op is like your. greatest rival, an enemy, a primary.

source of opposition. And there's so. many times in these Reddit stories where. this person is friends with their. biggest OP. >> That's Yeah. >> And you're just like, "Girl, like you. got to run. This this girl hates you or. you're dating your biggest op. >> This guy does not like you." I literally. I don't know how I ended up on this side. of videos, but I keep getting the most. disturbing videos of like people doing. pranks and being like there was this one. prank going around where you would. introduce your boyfriend to the camera. I was like, "This is my friend.". >> Mhm. >> And these guys, it was like a.

compilation video. And all of these guys. were like, "Your friend?" And they'd. like hit the girl with a pillow or like. like hit her in the face. And I'm like, "This is [ __ ] deranged." Like do not. date, do not be friends with, do not. associate with, don't breathe air in the. same room as your biggest op. >> If you feel someone's your op, you got. to go. >> You got to be done. >> No matter what it is. >> So, we're getting into stories today. >> I'm I'm sorry. I'm I I'm I'm trying to. think if I would be upset if I was hit. with a pillow. I think I'd be okay.

Depends on how hard the hit was. >> I'm going to show you the video. >> I'm going to show you the video. It was. disturbing. But yeah, these stories all have an op. And we get to determine who is who. Is. it a big op or am I making small peanuts. out of nothing? >> Big peanuts out of nothing. >> Ooh, that mountains out of mole hills. for sure. >> That's above my pay grade. >> Yeah. But I'm super excited. We've got. wine. We've got pumpkins. We've got good. vibes. It's a Friday.

Friday. I love a weekend. It's been a stressful. past few weeks. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's been a. stressful year. >> I'm fostering a dog right now, and this. dog is being my biggest op. I I love. him, but he's just. a little goofy. He's so cute though. Inside though, he's good inside the. house. He's great. Yeah. The minute you. walk out the front door, though. >> Yeah. >> Bad news bears. But it's all good. I'm.

going to help him find his next amazing. home. >> Yeah. Okay. Are you ready? >> Mhm. >> Let's dive in. >> Let's do it.

Heat. Heat.

This episode is presented by State Farm. There's impressive, like instantly. winning over your boyfriend's parents. And then there's impressive, like being. smart about saving money for your dream. home or a sweet new ride. And a great. way to do that is to bundle home and. auto with the State Farm personal Price. Plan. Bundling just another way to save. with the personal price plan. Like a. good neighbor, State Farm is there. Prices are based on ratings plans that. vary by state. Coverage options are. selected by the customer. Availability,

amount of discounts and savings, and. eligibility vary by state. Let's kick. this off. Okay, so this first one coming. from Am I the [ __ ] titled, "Am I the. [ __ ] for telling my friend that her. baby looks like an alien?". >> Ooh! O and how soon after, too? Oh gosh. My best friend of 15 years recently had. a newborn baby boy. I went to visit her. at the hospital. Her whole family was. there, including her husband or baby. daddy because they're not actually.

married. Side note, we had a fling in. high school. Anyways, she asked me. whether her baby was cute or not and. told me to be as honest as possible. because she couldn't tell since, of. course, it's her own baby. Honesty has. always been a policy in our friendship. In the past, I've always been honest. with her, like whether an outfit was. ugly or a haircut was bad. And she. always admired that quality about me. So, I thought, why not be honest about.

this, too? She did it to herself. I told her that at first he looked kind. of alienish and that his head was a bit. oversized. She laughed. Then my neurode. divergent brain kind of got off track. and I went into detail about his bulging. eyes, long arms, and double chin among. other things. >> Bro, I kind of lost it a bit. And by the end, she was in tears. just like couldn't.

stop. I realized as she was holding him. that she had really taken it to heart. and now I feel bad. She was pretty quiet. at first and then later told me to leave. the room. I felt so bad. She was. literally sobbing at this point. Later. that day, I got a paragraph long text. from her telling me that she's never. going to talk to me again and that I. went too far this time. She said she. thinks her baby is adorable and that I. was way too brutal about her newborn. blessing. Sure, I kind of feel bad, but.

she literally told me to be honest and I. was. I gave my two cents because she. asked. And I don't think I should be. blasted for telling the truth. Am I the. [ __ ]. You know, here's the thing. I've I've come across. people where again she laughed at first. when whenever OP said alienish. >> That's a normal thing like Right. I. heard a lot of people talk about that. Right. So then I was I'm thinking that.

is not that big of a deal. A lot of a. lot of little babies are like and it's. cute. It's a little like squishy. I. don't know whatever. So sometimes people. talk in that type of language but. bulging eyes and scraggly arms like calm. down. Like reel it in. What are you doing? I don't know. I just. kind of think like yeah, like you are. you are the [ __ ] you can still be. honest and be tasteful about it. I mean, if that's your your relationship and you.

guys are like honesty is best policy and. she's expecting you like to not lie to. her face, you could still give like feel. like you're not lying to her and then. and still chill out, you know? I mean, especially have a little bit of common. sense. This is somebody who just gave. birth. There's a lot of hormones. involved. There's a lot of love. involved. Like, chill out. What are you. doing? What do you think? >> I'm completely on board with you. I'm a. bit baffled that. >> Well, we've always had an honest. relationship.

>> Have you? Or do you just say you're. honest when in reality you're kind of. actually a jackass? Because I've always. been honest with her. Whether it's a bad. haircut or her outfit sucks. Like, I. don't know. Like I get you want your. friends to kind of help you if you. really look hideous, but at the same. time like you you're kind of coming. across like your opinion is so high and. mighty. >> Yeah. >> And I'm like this is her baby. Like. what? What's the point of dragging this. baby? Like you dragged the [ __ ] out of. this baby.

>> She can't send it back. >> Like so you just traumatized her. Said. her baby is really really ugly. Like why. not just lie? or why not just end at. alien? They they say that there there's. a phrase I'm not going to know it. You. probably will botch it. But um there's a phrase that's some that. goes along the lines of um don't tell. someone something unless it's something. they can fix in a few seconds. Oh, we've. talked about this. Yeah, I love that. It's just like if you want like a.

haircut, okay, let's fix this a little. bit. Let's push your bangs to the side. because this is accentuating XYZ. and. then next time ask them for this type of. cut. Cool. Whatever. If that's what. works for your relationship, great. But. like if you were to like go in and be. like, "I hate your chin." Or like. something like that. That's You don't do. that. Just don't do that. It's just not. There's no reason that that helps anyone. unless they're literally like going into. like a cosmetic surgery and they're. showing you like these like pictures and.

they're like, "Do you like chin one or. chin two?" Like then then fine. >> But like otherwise, shut up. Don't do. it. I'm very very confused how they've. lasted 15 years. I also think like just. in this post too, there's so many subtle. digs where she's even like I went to. visit her at the hospital. Her whole. family was there including her husband. parenthesis or baby daddy because. they're not actually married. Side note, we had a fling in high school.

>> Yeah. >> So basically like I had him first. I. didn't want him. We had a fling in high. school. Also, they're not even married. >> So, >> yeah. >> What? >> Mhm. >> Why is that relevant to this story at. all? >> Yeah. >> Again, do you like your friend? >> Mhm. >> They're not even married, so it's just. baby daddy. >> Yeah. Know, that's. >> that that baby was born out of wedlock. Ew. The fact that you would mention this. actually in this post is so odd and it's.

really making it seem like. a lot of jealousy. >> So much jealousy. She got the life that. you wanted. >> or something. I don't know. But. >> something's off. >> Yeah. I do not blame her for being like, I don't want to talk to you anymore. I. mean clearly again as you mentioned like. hormones just had this baby maybe had 30. hours of labor and then you went through. all that and someone says your kid looks. like [ __ ]. >> Yeah.

>> Like she was sobbing to the point of. just tears and I understand why you. would need to at least take a break from. the friendship. If not end it for good. Top comment on this one. Obviously. you're the [ __ ] Laughing my ass off. Why did you even waste your time posting. this? >> Next one down, the I'm not mean. I'm. just honest and I didn't mean to be. mean. I'm just neurode divergent clubs. need to be annihilated. Mhm.

>> And I will say a lot of people start. picking up on that where it's like. having anything whether it's autism, ADHD, neurode diverency, mental health. issues, whatever it is, like that's not. an excuse to be mean or XYZ to other. people there. Yeah. There's like you. could like if if they were to mention it. and be like I can't really tell because. I'm wondering if this is a part like. maybe something that's missing me. But.

I'm just I feel like it came off very. much as like an excuse. Like why would I. like I'm I'm in the clear. I didn't do. anything wrong because I'm just being. honest. >> Yeah. So that's what's annoying. Next. top comment. You're the [ __ ] She. asked for honesty, not a full roast of. her newborn. >> So true. Most babies look a little weird. at first, but listing every feature. after she was already laughing crossed. into being hurtful. Being honest doesn't. mean saying everything you think,

especially to someone who's just given. birth. the full roast comment like just. actually makes me laugh cuz truly like. it it feels like one of those things. that you see on TV where they're just. when they like go and like roast the. celebrities just is like that's not what. I don't think that's what she asked for. >> No. >> Yeah. Reel it in. >> Someone does point out the we had a. fling comment. >> I knew you were the [ __ ] after the we. had a fling comment. Ugly baby or not, honey, she won. Let him go.

>> Oh god. I love I love that. I mean. honestly I think it's so disrespectful. to. >> why mention. >> bring that up in like any context unless. like the person who is married brings it. up. I just I think it's really. >> not tasteful. >> It's not. >> No, that would bother that bother me. like. >> that's in the past. It's not Let's not. do that. >> I know. I feel like we had a story. It. might have been on Patreon where the. friend had introduced them and was like.

talking about giving a speech at their. wedding or something and was just like, I need everyone to know. Like basically, I introduced you. I'm the reason you. guys are together. >> So weird. >> Or gave that speech at the engagement. party. >> Yeah, >> it's sounding super familiar. If anyone. knows, please let me know in the. comments. >> Well, we do get an edit from OP. >> Let's hear it. >> Okay, everyone. I know everyone thinks. I'm the [ __ ] but if everyone knew. what she said when I got my first. husband, you would know why I thought it.

was okay to be so honest. I still don't. think I'm the [ __ ]. >> Oh, okay. >> Edit. >> 10 toes down. >> Yeah. Edit two. Y'all are so [ __ ]. rude. Yes, I'm autistic and ADHD. Yes, it. makes me say cruel things, but I don't. mean it. If anything, I have good. intentions with what I say. Y'all should. read a [ __ ] book about neurode. divergent minds instead of ridiculing. us. I'm not using it as an excuse, but.

rather an explanation. Go touch grass. and stop bullying those of us in the. world who care about authenticity. You You came here and asked for people's. opinion. They're giving you their. opinion. Like and that's what that's what gets me. is that like if if the neurode divergent. was as just like an explanation that I. think that there'd be a little bit more. like being receptive to people's. feedback and sure if people are being. really mean about it then like. acknowledging that. But I do think the.

tento's down I didn't do anything wrong. and like you guys just need to accept. that like I'm going to say mean things. and I I I deserve to do that. I think it. would be way better if OP responded and. said, "Hey, calm down. Maybe you guys. are not familiar with this, but these. things do happen. I don't mean harm." At. the end of the day, if it hurt my. friend, it hurt my friend, and that's. what I need to focus on. >> I didn't realize there was going to be. so much harshness. I was just looking.

for But that wasn't what was happening. And I think that that would be a really. good like, >> well, and here's the thing. And maybe. maybe I'm misunderstanding what she's. saying. M. >> but for her to say I'm autistic and. ADHD. Yes. It makes me say cruel things. I'm autistic and have ADHD. You have. ADHD. It doesn't make us say cruel. things. So I'm like, are you trying to. imply that autism and ADHD is the reason. you say cruel things because other. people have those same diagnoses and it.

doesn't make them say cruel things. So. maybe you just need better coping. strategies to keep those things in. >> Yeah. >> You know what I mean? Like I know what. you mean. I do I do think Maybe I'm. maybe I am totally misunderstanding what. she is saying though. >> Well, and it's hard for me to say too. cuz I think that everything is so. unique, right? Like I feel like every. aspect of like neurode diverency is like. there's it's like a personality along. with it. So it's like for some people. like it might. >> look way different than another person. >> It it does look different from person to.

person. >> Yeah. So, I don't want to like speak on. behalf. But I do I do think that at the. end of the day, like if you feel that. you're saying cruel things, then you. should be like, I am so sorry, and then. own it and be like, I am so sorry. That. is not my intention. Like, I just. thought that's how my brain was. processing. I meant no harm instead of. being like, I didn't do anything wrong. >> I'm just being honest. >> Yeah. like be own it and be like I I. said a cruel thing but it was out of.

love and I'm so sorry it it came from a. >> a place of love. >> Yeah. >> And then you but like instead that's. what's making OP's story just not really. you know. >> it's not lining up. >> It's not that great. >> Yeah. No, definitely definitely an op. Okay, moving on to number two here. >> Oh, I was hoping for another update. >> I wish OP did delete their account. >> Bye [ __ ] Bye. So, number two is coming from r/. relationships. My boyfriend, 19 male, got the job.

instead of me, 19 female. He's. unintentionally rubbing it in my face, but won't stop. My boyfriend and I both. applied for an open position for. undergrads at a local engineering. company. The position was very. appealing. It offered good pay, flexible. hours, and was a great resume addition. since they're a pretty big company. The. application process was long and arduous. and extremely competitive, and they. ended up only accepting three undergrads.

out of a final pool of 10. Boyfriend and. I both go to the same school, top five. in the US. So, education wise, we were. both qualified, and he majors in CS, while I major in bio with a minor in CS. I hate to turn this into a competition, but my boyfriend is smarter than me in a. lot of areas. He has a more analytical. brain, whereas I'm more creative. I have. a heftier resume than him, and I'm. better at communication. I would have. loved for us to both get the job, but if.

not, I was fairly sure that I would get. it. Also, he only decided to apply after. I told him that I was applying, >> but that's a whole other issue that I. don't want to delve into. >> Mhm. >> Anyways, we both make it to the final. pool of 10, but he ends up getting the. job and I don't. I was upset but hid my. sadness in order to be happy for him. I. really, really wanted that job. When he. got the email, he was ecstatic and he. was running all over his dorm excited.

and screaming. I was still in the room. at the time. He already knew I didn't. get it, so it kind of hurt that he acted. in such a dramatic way. He did apologize. afterwards. Anyways, now he's been. working there for about 2 months and. it's going great for him, but he. unintentionally rubs it in my face a. lot. I'm currently working as an intern. at a CS lab at our school, and of. course, I get paid less than him, and I.

have less benefits, but I quite like the. job. My boyfriend will say stuff like, quote, "Aw, you only get paid $1,5.50 an. hour. >> That's so little. I get paid $20 an. hour. Or he'll say something like, quote, "Hey, we had a sushi buffet today. and there was so much sushimi. Did you. guys get any?" Like, no, we didn't, obviously. Thanks for asking. Other. examples are, quote, "Look at all the.

free stuff I got. You get any free stuff. this week?" I can't believe I'm getting. paid this much to do basically intro. stuff. I love my job so much. I definitely. understand that half of this is because. he actually likes his job and can't. contain his excitement, but the other. half kind of comes across as. insensitive. Yeah, though he might not. realize it. If I didn't apply for the. job and not get it, then of course I.

wouldn't mind, but he knows that I tried. super hard to get the job and didn't end. up getting it. Shouldn't he know to tone. it down a bit? Or am I being too. sensitive? I want to tell him it makes. me sad, but don't want to come across as. selfish. Just because I didn't get the. job doesn't mean he can't be happy about. it. Different things. OP, this is like. to me this is deeper than what you think. it is. Thank you. That's so messed up. I.

mean, I think that if they were like. really sarcastic people and, you know, that's the way that they communicated. with each other like and he thought that. like they could be funny, then maybe. But like I don't see really any anywhere. way way that he could possibly. think that what he's saying is okay. Unless she had just done that to him. about a previous situation and so he. thought he was being playful. But like.

even then it still wouldn't be okay. because the reality is is like a job is. such a sensitive thing for everybody. like if you're doing good at your job, if you're not, if you're happy, if. you're not, like it's just like it's a. it's something that people put a lot of. effort and focus and their heart goes. into a lot of it. And so to mess around. like that is just so cruel. Yeah. I. can't I'm like I'm trying to see if. there's any way to like devil's advocate.

this one and I I can't. I just I can't. I think it's He's a big [ __ ]. I'm a little confused. by the whole scenario, too, of like you. telling him, "I'm applying for this job. I'm really excited about it," and then. he goes and applies. >> Oh, yeah. >> Was it to knock you down a peg? Was it. because this is truly just a once-. ina-lifetime. internship job opportunity and he needed.

to do it? I'm kind of weirded out by it. because it's like, why couldn't you let. her have this? And then add on the fact. that he continuously is rubbing your. face in it. It's so messed up. We had a. sushi buffet at lunch today. Did you get. any? There was so much sushimi. >> Yeah. No, I didn't have sushi today. I'm. working at the school. I I'm not even. there. Honest. And like the thing is is. like I think that if he wasn't trying to. be a complete [ __ ] he would have.

just left it at like we got sashimi. today. I was so excited. But did you did. did you get any like knowing knowing. that she didn't? It's so. >> it's pointed. It's very very. purposeful and feels malicious. Again, just these jabs. Did you get any? >> Right. >> You only get paid $1,450. I get $20 an. hour. >> I know. If if if she would have just. been like he kept saying how much he. loves his job. I love my job so much. Then I'd be like, "Okay, you know what?

He probably doesn't mean it. He probably. just can't contain his excitement. But I. can't from these quotes, I can't. >> I can't believe that he's doing anything. else besides trying to put her down and. feel bigger. Like I just don't I. >> I can't see it otherwise. And I'm try I. tried. >> No, I just And I get being so overly. excited and like this is a big. opportunity. Cool. But. >> you still in your head have to realize. my girlfriend was up for the same.

position. >> She didn't get it. I did the typical. response I think for something like this. which maybe isn't necessarily the right. response but would to be more reserved. because you feel bad rubbing it in the. other person's face. Exactly. >> That's more typical than this. >> And it's again again and again very. consistent. >> There's not anyone I could imagine. speaking to in this way. So to do it to. like your the person that you're. supposed to like really be looking out. for and be a team and be partners with. is just like what? Like I wouldn't even.

do this to a stranger. >> Like I wouldn't even do this to someone. I don't like. >> Like imagine talking to a coworker like. this that you're going out for the same. promotion. >> Yeah. No, >> you wouldn't. >> It's unprofessional. >> It's mean. >> It's very cruel. Top comment on the. post. They quote the 1550 an hour. I get. paid 20. They say that's an [ __ ] move. by your boyfriend. Regardless of all of. the other insensitive crap he's doing, this one is the worst. That's not. unintentional either. He's doing this on. purpose. Exactly. Someone responds to.

that and says, "Even if I generously. assume the boyfriend is just terminally. clueless, there's a clear vibe of sucks. to be you going on here.". >> Exactly. >> It may help ease the sting a little if. next time you can work in a I'm. delighted that you're well paid. When. are you taking me out to a nice dinner. to celebrate? It would probably hurt a. lot less if he was making any sort of. attempt to have his success also be your. success in a rising tide lifts all boats. kind of way. I get that he can't like.

bring home lunch, sushi, and a takeout. box for you, but he can at least use a. little of his extra $5 an hour to take. you on a nice date. Kind of a side note, but I'm also really sideeying his I. can't believe I'm getting paid this much. to do basically intro stuff. I'm a CS. major. Yeah. And especially with. internships, you actually don't really. want to be doing intro stuff. You want. to be doing work that will prepare you. for the real working world. It may be. easy now, but when he has to explain his. summer intern work when job searching,

he's either going to have to be real. good at bullshitting and then learning. real fast, or he's going to end up in a. mediocre job. This comment is not making. his work ethic look real good. OP. responds, "I actually love this. I will. definitely try that line about dinner. Thanks. I'm probably going to have an. actual sedone conversation with him, though. After that, if he slips again, I'll use that. Trust me, it's probably. not actually intro stuff. He's probably. bragging to make himself seem smarter. Yes, I said it. My boyfriend has quite. the ego. He thinks very highly of.

himself because he just knows he's smart. and that he doesn't really have. competition. I mean, cool, intelligence. is attractive, but when you flaunt it. too much, it gets really tiring. That's. I I was going to say it's just like it's. not attractive when people act like a. complete fill in the blank about it. It's like well go be smart by yourself. Bye bye. Well, and it's just like the. comment here. It's like I mean he does. this about sometimes other things like a.

really high test score even though I got. a bad one. Again, just looking back at. their ages, they're 19. >> Yeah. >> He's clearly got an ego. >> Mhm. He's been, you know, maybe the. smartest kid in his class for a while. and people do on him and tell him how. good he is. But I don't think that means. you should stick around and. >> be belittled. Like this is someone that. if you do stick with them, it's always. going to be I'm better than you. I'm. smarter than you. >> I don't know. I I think that there's a.

chance he grows out of this type of. thing. Like you said, he's really. >> I think he could I think he could grow. out of it, >> but I don't think that OP should have to. wait for it. No, he needs to be knocked. down a couple pegs and it's not going to. come from you because I don't think. >> he respects you enough in that way. And. that's exactly why I don't think that. >> OP should stay cuz I'm just like there's. just I think the core thing of a. relationship respect doesn't feel like. it's there. Respect and consideration. And you know maybe if if like he's so. wonderful in every other way then like.

yeah then stay and figure it out with. him. But like if you're feeling this is. a theme in a lot of areas, then it's. really something to make scadaddle. >> Yeah. Um. >> bye. >> But if you stay, you should definitely. be like, great. I'm not paying for. anything anymore. You make so much more. than me. You're like, "Daddy, daddy's. credit. >> You're going to treat me.". >> Yeah. >> Thank you, babe. >> Just tell everyone. >> So nice. You're making more money than. me. >> Yeah. I am.

>> I am dating just the servers. I am. dating the smartest guy who makes so. much money, so it's on him tonight. Thank you, babe. >> Oh, yeah. Play into it. OP does start. reading all these comments cuz. everyone's like, "This isn't. unintentional. This isn't normal. This. isn't okay.". >> And he goes, "All of these comments have. made me realize how he's being. incredibly insensitive." And half of. these might even be slightly. intentional. >> I will be having a very serious. conversation about this with him.

Thanks. And just some other details of. like thank you for that comment. I am. going to use that. Yep. Using that line. this that. And then we get an update. Let's hear it. You were not as excited. as I wanted you to be. Let's hear it. Thank you. Thank you. That was nice. A. massive thanks to everyone who gave me. advice and also opened my eyes to how. big of a douchebag my boyfriend of 8. months was being. Woo. Special thanks to.

those who eloquently put what I've been. wanting to say for the past few months. into words for me so I could say it to. him. A day after I made the post, we. were hanging out in his dorm when he. began talking about his work. He wasn't. necessarily bragging this time. It was. more like talking about some projects. that they're having him do. After a. pause in the conversation, I decided to. bring up my feelings about him rubbing. his job in my face and constantly. comparing our positions. I said. something along the lines of quote, "I'm.

really, really happy for your job, and I. can tell that you really love it and. have a great time there. I'm not sure if. you remember, but I was actually really. disappointed that I didn't get that job, but I've been trying to move on from my. disappointment. However, I feel that you. are making it harder for me to move on. by constantly comparing our two. positions. Sometimes it seems like. you're trying to rub the benefits of. your job in my face." I then listed a. couple of examples. I've been feeling a. bit hurt over this and I would really. love it if you could stop comparing our. positions because that's very.

inconsiderate and maybe instead we can. both share a bit about our day at work. without turning it into a contest. End. quote. After that, my boyfriend squinted. at me and said, quote, "Are you. serious?". >> Classic. He then proceeded to tell me. that I was, some of you guys called it, being way too sensitive. He also asked, quote, "Why can't I be happy about my. job?" And quote, "Do you just want me to.

never talk about anything that you don't. have because it makes you feel shitty?". This is so infuriating. >> He also said to my utmost astonishment, quote, I mean, I don't see the problem. with comparing the two positions. It is. obvious that my job has better benefits. and perks than yours, and I'm just. pointing them out. You don't need to see. that in a negative light. What an Oh my. god, you're such an idiot. Go. Just. stop. Stop. Stop interacting with.

humanity. There was much more [ __ ]. that came out of his mouth. But after. like 2 minutes of hearing him rant about. how I was being too sensitive and. restricting his happiness, I said his. name, "You are an absolute piece of. [ __ ] Everything you just said was not. only extremely inconsiderate, but very. selfish. I really, really wanted to just. yell at him and list off the hundreds of. things that was wrong with what he said, but instead I refrained and just said, "Dude, we're over." Hell yeah. This is.

so satisfying. He said, "What?" Yeah. And I got up from his bed and bolted. straight out of the door. I've been. ignoring his text calls and Facebook. messages for the past few days. I. actually feel like a huge weight has. been lifted off my shoulders. I'm. enjoying my job more and overall I just. feel free as [ __ ] On a side note, there's this cute guy who sits two. computers away from me at the lab I. currently work at. Winky face.

>> Love it. What a beautiful, beautiful. ending. Also, just want to point out. that response. I'm not even surprised. And I do think that all of us should be. aware because that is such gaslighting. behavior. And I think that it can if. like we didn't have this village, if OP. didn't have this village behind her, like cheering her on, rooting for her. and just, you know, all of the support. that's come from this. OP might be like,

crap, am I being too sensitive? and and. really start secondguessing herself. Especially the way that OP explained it. was very kind, she just expressed like. really her feelings and instead of her. partner coming and meeting her there and. being like that was not my intention. I'm so sorry that you're feeling that. way. I'm so sorry that I made you feel. that way. Like goes into this attack. mode. And it's common for people to get. defensive when someone calls them out on.

their behavior. But like if that if they. can't come down to earth with you when. you're expressing yourself like in such. a effective way then the like your. relationship will always be so miserable. because anytime you guys hit a bump in. the road you're going to feel so unheard. and like nothing's going to get solved. And so I do think it's really important. for us to like hear the way that he. responded and then when you're in. conversations.

with somebody that you might be. questioning, realize what they're doing. is not is not okay. And you know, be. able to be confident in that and not. fall for what they're trying to do, which is gaslight the f out of you. >> Sorry, was that too long? >> Sorry, that was a lot. I really like it. and I I No, I do think it's something. people need to hear because it's so easy. to just like. >> obviously we want to hope for the best. in people and think that they don't have. ill intentions or whatever. And you.

know, maybe they don't. Maybe that's. just their twisted way of thinking and. they're. >> I don't know, maybe like they have a. victim complex and it's like no, like. you don't want me to talk about my job. like you're not happy for me. And it's. like I don't know maybe the reframing. and gaslighting or whatever it is like. is coming from a not evil place but. >> most of it's not. >> I and I I do think that is the case. But. >> hey like that person needs to work on. it. You were just trying to explain your. feelings and if your feelings are met. with. >> contempt and disdain and reframing it so.

you're the bad guy. Like that's not. okay. Like. >> you went into this being like he's. unintentionally rubbing it into my face. You weren't even assuming bad motives. But he can't even take you saying like, "Hey, you're hurting my feelings." Yeah. He flips it on you, >> right? >> Regardless of the situation, you want a. partner that's going to meet you with. like, "I'm so sorry. Like, I made you. feel that way. I hear you. Let's work on. it going forward because obviously I'm. excited about my job and I know you, you. know, you're excited for me, too, just. in the same way I'm excited for you.". So, yeah, I'd love to talk about our.

jobs in constructive great ways. >> We should be able to do that. But. instead, it's like, well, clearly my job. is better than yours, so I'm going to. talk about the benefits. >> What. mismatch and goodbye? And honestly, if. you're listening to this and you feel. like I actually feel like I do that, then I I think that it's like something. to recognize cuz to your point, a lot of. these toxic qual I'm saying toxic, but. like just an umbrella of ways of. reacting in relationships that are not.

necessarily helping or positive for the. relationship. A lot of them don't come. from like trying to be evil. No, a lot. of them come from like being like so. wrapped up in your own defenses that you. don't even see or realize what you're. doing is harmful and not helping the. relationship. And so. >> no one's perfect. Just recognizing. you're doing it is how you work through. it. >> Exactly. And I've done this. I'm sure. we've all done some extent. >> It's human to be defensive and try to. reframe it because it's it's literally.

like a psychological thing to defend. yourself. It's so normal, but doesn't mean you. have to deal with it. >> And if it is you, then work on it. >> Yeah, absolutely. >> This next one needs a little work. >> Okay, maybe a lot of work. >> Okay, this episode is brought to you by. Chrysler. Parenting asks you to be a. chauffeur, referee, snack distributor, and somehow keep an eye on everything. all at once. The newly designed Chrysler. Pacifica is designed to make that. juggling act a little easier. With.

features like stowandgo seating and. storage, the fam cam and rear seat. entertainment, and hands-free power. sliding doors and liftgate, it's. stylish, practical, and thoughtfully. designed around the beautifully. unpredictable reality of family life. So, check out the newly designed. Chrysler Pacifica. Visit chrysler.com to. learn more. Chrysler is a registered. trademark of SCA US LLC. Okay, number. three for us here coming from Am I the.

[ __ ] It is titled Am I the [ __ ]. for calling my sister useless and. telling her she has to start pulling her. weight. >> I don't know about the second one, but. the first one, yes. >> I, 33 female, have a sister, 23 female, named Hannah. I am a stay-at-home mom. and I have three kids. I am in charge of. 100% of the household duties while my. husband takes care of the bills. Hannah. met her husband, 30 male, when she was.

in college. They got married shortly. after she graduated. Hannah is on the. spectrum, gets overwhelmed very easily, and is a little slow. Because of this, her husband told her that if she doesn't. want to work, she doesn't have to work, and he will take care of everything. Hannah has never worked a day in her. life. Her husband is a high earnner and. comes from a wealthy family, so money. isn't a problem for them. She also. rarely cooks or cleans. The most she. will do is load the dishwasher and put. dirty clothes in the washing machine.

The only thing Hannah does during the. day is play with her four cats or read. She likes to knit, too. Recently, we. were at our parents house for dinner. During the dinner, my mom would not stop. gushing over how good my brother-in-law. treats my sister. She almost started. crying because of how happy she was that. my sister found someone who loves her. and takes care of her. My mom even gave. my brother-in-law a hug and thanked him. for taking such good care of her. At the.

end of the dinner, my mom picked up my. dad's plate. I picked up my husband's. plate. And I was expecting my sister to. pick up her husband's plate, but no. My. brother-in-law picked up my sister's. plate and told her to go relax and when. he's ready, they can head back home. She. asked him to hurry, but don't rush. because she is tired. He gave her a kiss. and told her that he would be back in a. minute. That didn't sit right with me. When I got done doing mine and my. husband's dishes, I went to the living.

room and I saw my sister laying down on. the couch. I went over to her and I told. her that she should start contributing. more to her household or her husband. will get tired of her. Oh my god. >> She seemed confused at first and I said. to her that no man wants a useless wife. Wow. Not true, by the way. There's lots. of people out there that want to just. princess treatment. My brother-in-law.

walked in on me saying this and got very. mad. Yeah. He yelled at me that my. sister isn't useless and worth isn't. measured and how often she does the. dishes. >> He called me bitter and told me that I. was pathetic for talking to my sister. that way. >> I love this guy. I love this guy. >> He thanked my parents for the lovely. night and barged out of the house. My. parents agreed with him and told me that. I was being harsh and shouldn't. intervene with my sister's marriage. They said that I should apologize to my.

sister and that I sound jealous of her. >> You are. >> My husband told me I was right and that. nobody but my brother-in-law would want. to marry my sister and that she doesn't. contribute anything to her household. >> Of course, he's like, "Keep working, bitch.". Am I the [ __ ] for trying to give my. sister marriage advice? >> Such a big [ __ ] Yes. >> Yeah, you're the [ __ ]. >> If you actually cared, if you were. actually like genuinely worried about. her well-being and her like long-term.

happiness, this is not how you would. have approached it. It is full speed. jealousy. So obvious. Don't even try to. pretend it's not. Get in the kitchen and. wash those dishes, [ __ ] Also, are you. in their house every day? Are you. watching what she does every day? Maybe. she is being a home maker. Maybe she is. doing more than just throwing laundry in. the washing machine and loading the. dishwasher. It's also just so funny.

It's like every relationship is going to. work a little bit differently. Surprise. It's like, you know, like if if they're. happy, they're happy. Why are you trying. to intervene? It's so weird. >> Yeah. If that's working for them, leave. it. Are you unhappy with your dynamic? Clearly, like what? Like why feel the need? Who. cares? It is jealousy. It is jealousy that she. can get by. >> knitting and other cats. She has a great.

life, >> playing with her four cats and reading. I'm like, sign me the [ __ ] up for what. Hannah's got. >> Okay, let's go. Like, >> it is interesting that you feel the need. to intervene and say something. No one. likes a useless wife. so messed up. >> Clearly not useless. Clearly their. dynamic is working. >> I mean, even as the husband said, like. your worth isn't measured by how many. dishes you do. >> No, >> you don't know their dynamic. And maybe. he really values that he can come home. and. >> vent about his day and that is his.

sounding board and she's supportive and. they have this amazing emotional mental. relationship and maybe maybe it's just. physical. I don't know. But it doesn't. matter because it's working for them. >> Yeah. And my Okay, to build off of that, I actually um my brother was dating. someone once who made us breakfast. I. thought it was so nice. So, I wanted to. I started doing the dishes without even. her like without even asking. And she. was like, "Oh, no, no, no, please, please." And I was like, "No, let me.". And she goes, "No, you don't understand.

Like, it's it's therapeutic to me. Like, I feel like it's meditative to me to be. able to do the dishes. Like, I zone out. and it I I really like it." And I'm. like, "Oh, okay. Well, then go off, sis. You know, so it's just like if they if. you see people that are happy, then why. are why are you trying to intervene? It's because you're jealous. Like you're. just jealous, you know? >> No, it's totally what it is. >> Yeah. And and and you know, it's. jealousy because if you were really. worried, you would never call anybody. useless. I've like had somebody say this.

to me as a joke before and I got very. serless. And and I got very serious because we. had a playful relationship where like. her and I would like, you know, mess. with each other, but I was like, "Don't. ever call me that." I just think to ever. >> Yes. >> to ever call somebody worthless or. useless, >> I just think that those words are so. that's. >> those are not. >> those are not words that you should be. using towards a person. I'm sorry. >> So completely and utterly degrading and.

in it's almost like inhumane. It's. worthless. >> Yeah. So, I just Yeah. So, again, I am. like very opposed to. >> everything that OP's throwing down right. now. >> Can we give um a little round of. applause for the brother-in-law? >> Yes. >> Yes. >> God bless. >> I love that energy. >> We honestly just side in a very similar. sounding way.

It's so It's just so refreshing. Obviously, the comments, they agree. Love to hear it. Overall vote on the. post was [ __ ]. >> Top comment based on ordering in the. default way. Top. Her husband cleared. her plate from the table once. So, she. is useless and unworthy. >> Obviously, you're the [ __ ] Your. brother-in-law and parents are right. and your husband either just doesn't. want to argue with you or is also an.

[ __ ] But I think you were on the. money where you're like, "Oh my god, yeah, she sucks. Keep doing what you're. doing, babe. You're doing great.". >> Like. even even relationships where there's a. stay-at-home parent and one person that. goes to work, >> even in most. >> a lot of those dynamics, the person that. works full-time still comes home and. contributes and helps in some way. >> Yeah. Mhm. So, >> definitely. >> Yeah. I think I think the guy's got it. made. >> Yeah.

>> And he's like, "Let's not let's not rock. the boat." Uh-uh. You're doing great, sweetie. >> Yeah. Exactly. >> So, someone does respond to that, too. And basically agrees and is like, "Her. husband pretty much seems to consider. her a servant. From the sound of it, he. makes messes and expects her to pick it. up after him and has implied she's only. worth marrying because she does the. menial work taking care of him when he. lounges about." Her sister might have. been a person she could count on if she. wishes to up and leave her husband. But. I bet that bridge is now well and truly.

toast. In most households, once he's. home from work and she has been working. all day, evening chores are split. Literally what I was saying. But nope, he gets to put in his 8 hours a day and. she works 24 and much harder, too. And. then picks up after him at her own. parents house. Sheesh. Next comment. You're the [ __ ] You and your husband. both. Jealousy isn't a good look on. anyone. Their relationship isn't any of. your business. And how dare you try to. speak for her husband and stir up. trouble. >> Yeah. Wild. >> Quote, "That didn't sit right with me.".

Yeah. How dare her husband treat her so. well? Everyone knows it's a woman's job. to pick up the dishes. I roll. >> Yeah. >> She maybe could convince me that she had. good intentions as she approached it and. was like, "Okay, I don't I don't want to. intervene, but I've heard of my. girlfriend. her husband ended up leaving. her because she didn't contribute and I. just I just wanted to I just want to. make sure you stay happy then like maybe. I could be like okay maybe she had good.

intentions to still stay the [ __ ] out of. their business and still absolutely like. not but like but there's no chance you. can't convince me any like no no good. intentions all jealousy. >> even if you were concerned that maybe. you want her to have a little financial. independence. >> right. >> hey just want to make sure you're good. like get a job part time, you know, you. don't have kids. Maybe put some money. away just in case. >> Yeah. >> But like, no, you're you're clearly not.

concerned. >> if you're calling her useless. I took. problem with that. >> I do too. >> Why? Cuz she's just. >> Sorry. >> What? Huh? I No, I meant I took problem. with her calling her useless, too, is. what I thought. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, cool. Cool. >> Oh my god. Oh, Pete. Grow up, my girl. Grow up. Moving along to this next one. This person also has a lot of growing up. to do. I do have a trigger warning on.

this story. It does contain mentions of. EDS, so please listen with care or if. you can't handle that today, just skip. to the next one. So, this is coming from. r/am overreacting. It's titled, "Am I overreacting? My mom. wants to wear my prom dress to my. wedding. My mom has lost a lot of weight and I'm. very proud of her. That said, she is. trying to fit into my prom dress, which. I wore when I was my skinniest. My mom.

has always been very negative about my. weight and her own. Every time I'm. around her, she makes me either weigh. myself or tell her how much I weigh. She. tells me I need to lose weight and. always talks about how beautiful I used. to be when I could fit into that prom. dress. I'm planning my wedding and of. course she has to be in charge of every. detail, but she mainly wants me to lose. weight. My fiance and I made a pact to. lose weight before the wedding because.

of photos and we want to look and feel. our best. Thankfully, my fiance makes me. feel good when he talks about weight. loss and actually motivates me. So, that's a bit of the backstory for you. My mom called me the other day and said, "I'm going to lose enough weight to wear. your prom dress to your wedding." Now, this prom dress is very special to me. It represents when I was my skinniest, but I also had an eating disorder and. was very depressed. I love this prom. dress and have always been compared to.

the photos of me in this dress. The part. where I ask if I'm overreacting is when. I freaked out when she told me she. wanted to wear the dress and I told her. she wouldn't be allowed at the wedding. if she wore my dress. That dress. represents my past and I don't want it. brought into my future. I told her she. couldn't wear the dress and now she. doesn't want to help to pay for the. wedding. She said I'm not going to look good in a.

wedding dress anyways if I don't get. down to the size where I can wear that. dress again. Evil. I feel like she told. me she wanted to wear the dress in order. to get some reaction. So, Reddit, am I. overreacting? Also, everybody coming to my wedding has. seen those photos of me in the dress and. has compared me then to now. Pictures of. the dress attached. Yeah. No, this is awful. Oh my gosh. Yeah. No, you picked a This is a good.

story for this theme. This is This is. This is an op. This is a big big op. Big. OP. >> We want so bad it'll be little, but. she's a big op. >> Big OP. >> Sorry, that's a bad joke. >> No, I I sorry big op. I. would be distraught. And I think it's. really hard like I grew up with this in. high school where my mom was very very. very. concerned with weight always talking.

about weight and I think there's. something maybe it's a generational. thing because my mom you know I think. you know maybe Justin's mom and other. people I know in that generation there. is a lot of talk of weight. there was a. lot of pressure to be this model or. whatever. Like I think the media and. even now, I mean, we're getting back to. a point now where it's like there's a. lot of people that struggle with eating. disorders and these things. And so it's. like it's very very hard. But when you.

have your mom who's who's like. >> weighing you as an adult woman, there's. no mention of age, but like you're not. in high school anymore. You're getting. married. So, like you're an adult woman. and your mom is like, "You need to step. on this scale or tell me how much you. weigh.". >> It's really awful. >> This is a very, very, very unhealthy. relationship and you don't deserve this. >> No. >> And your mom being like, "I'm going to. wear your prom dress.". >> What the [ __ ] Well, and it's also, you. know, what what my brain was thinking. this entire time is that like mom would.

flaunt around the wedding and try to I. don't want to say steal the show and be. really dramatic. It feels like that's. what she's trying to do though, >> would definitely like take some of the. thunder away from the bride being like, "Look at me. I'm in her old prom dress, the one that she can't fit in anymore. Look how small I am. Aren't you?". >> That's 100% what this is about. And then. it's like it's also stealing the. spotlight, but also being like, "Fuck. you, daughter. >> [ __ ] you. See this dress? You can't fit.

in it, but I can." Like, it's bringing. the issue or just the concept because. it's not really an issue for OP. OP's. like, "I'm motivated to work out with my. fiance. >> because we just want to be healthier or. whatever." Like, he motivates me. That's. amazing. do it for you because it makes. you feel good, not anyone else, not. because you've been shamed, not because. your mom is giving you a complex. No, >> but the way in which this mom is. handling this and then. >> the manipulation of it where it's like,

I'm not paying for your wedding. And. [ __ ] you. You're not going to be able to. fit in that dress and you won't look. good in a wedding dress if you're not. that size. Like, it's so bad. I just it. makes me want to call my mom and say. thank you for never doing like my mom. >> has never done like anything remotely I. don't know and I'm just like all of our. parents like we they all. >> but it's like I just think like I. >> I don't know I just have like a lot of.

gratitude around that because I can't. imagine like growing up having to. experience that and again a lot of it. too is like you know people like to say. like it's our parents' first time living. too and XYZ. But like this is such a. clear case of the mom having these. issues that are being so deeply. projected onto her child in a way that. is so harmful and so unsupportive and so. mean. And I just think it just it it. pains me to hear stuff like this. And I. will say my mom has.

>> stopped. No, it was it was definitely it. was definitely like a high school. college thing and then I really like. enough was enough. I was like. >> I laid down the hammer and like set the. boundary and I was like you cannot bring. this up with me anymore. It is not. healthy. It is not okay. >> And she has never mentioned it since. Did not mention it with wedding dress. shopping. >> This mom for sure would and probably. did. Like every single dress she was. like, "You look beautiful." Yeah. >> Like, and I I think it's hard for me.

because like I think a lot of people go. through wedding stuff where they're. like, I'm going to be my my thinnest and. it's like why do we do that to. ourselves? Like that was not me. I. literally didn't I never did a wedding. dress diet. I never did that [ __ ] I was. like, I'm just going to be me and. >> it is what it is. Yeah, but I just I. don't know why we put that pressure on. ourselves and we don't need to like do. what makes you feel good on your day and. >> it's your day. That's like just be happy.

and have fun. That's all that matters. >> But let's get into these pictures. Okay, so this is OP. >> in her prom dress. It is a super cute. pink floral dress where like the top is. a floral lace with like a nude under and. the skirt is just a solid pink skirt. >> A cute prom dress. Very prom. >> Yeah, >> I would say this is not even a mother of.

the bride dress. >> No. Like this is very clearly a prom. dress to the point where like I feel. like mom was just trying to egg her on. and [ __ ] with her. >> Yeah. >> I almost wonder, not that I'd think OP. should take the risk given the mom, but. I almost wonder if OP was like, "Okay, you can wear it. Wear it." I wonder if she actually would. because it's. >> I think she would cuz I think that would. be Yeah. I think that OP's mom wants has.

this vision in her head of all the. guests coming and seeing her and being. like, "Oh my god, you are like, "You. look great." Or and then her being like, "Yeah, believe it or not, this is her. prom dress from 10 years ago." But what. she she herself has to change her body. to fit in the dress still. I don't know. It's interesting. And I'm like, I kind. of want to call her on the bluff, but I. wouldn't take the risk because I also. think. >> no, >> there's bigger issues that this is.

highlighting where I think this is a. great opportunity to. >> set boundaries with your mom. And it's. clear the mom is projecting insecurities. onto the daughter, >> creating issues. >> Absolutely. >> But this is your chance to set the. boundary. And if it's not received, then. you do have to make the tough choice of. going low contact, maybe going no. contact, maybe not getting financial. support for your wedding. And that. sucks. >> Absolutely sucks. >> But you've kind of proven by this. situation that it's not healthy.

>> And why give your mom any. satisfaction? Like it's not This is so. toxic. Yeah. I also just think like. unless somebody is asking something. inappropriate on their wedding, you. should just overall respect what. somebody the the attire that somebody. requests on their wedding day. I just. think that's a really simple one that's. just kind of like don't wear white, don't wear my prom dress, like add to.

the list. You know, some people ask. people, you know, like things like, you. know, uh get a professional makeup. artist to like cover up any tattoo. because you're at my wedding party and. like that can be a little that can be a. little aggressive, dye your hair. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. Like I think that. there's, you know, obviously requests. for weddings that get out of hand and. are asking to someone to curate them. that who they are to your aesthetic, which is weird. But I think when it.

comes to things like clothes, for the. mom to not have respect there, that. would really piss me off no matter what. it was. It's also insane. Like, you're. trying to wear a dress that she wore as. a child. Yeah. She was a teenager going. to prom. Like, you're trying to wear a. dress for a child. Like, prom. That's. why I'm saying like I do think the prom. dress is inappropriate because it's it's. not mature for a mother of the bride. This is a prom dress. A teenager wore. this. It would only be cool if they both. like were like.

both down, you know? >> It's so goofy. It's the weirdest thing. to like to die on that hill. >> What? It's the weirdest thing. >> Clearly not overreacting. And the top. comment says that not overreacting. I'd. rather have the cheapest wedding in the. world than let my mother do this. Make. it very clear. Take the dress and hide. it. And for God's sake, don't listen to. her comments about your weight. It. sounds like you found a decent man. Listen to him. In fact, tell her that if.

she mentions your weight for the wedding. one more time, she's going to be seated. at the furthest table from yours. Maybe. she'll check her attitude. Next comment. down. Literally rent a tiny storage. locker just for the dress so you know. where it is. OP [ __ ] unhinged. You also might want to just uninvite. her. Sounds like she would cause drama. and make you feel fat. No matter how. much weight you lose, choose you. >> Yeah, someone responds to that. If it. were me, I would just sell it or burn it.

or something. Break the cycle. >> Definitely. Definitely. Honestly. Next comment down, 8K up votes. First comment had 4.2K up. votes. This comment has almost 8K up. votes. 47 this awards. not overreacting. Your wedding is about you and your. husband, not anyone's hang-ups about. their body. Yeah, there's someone that. responds to that and says, "OP's quote,

I'm planning my wedding and of course. she has to be in charge of every. detail." No, she [ __ ] does not. >> Like, >> yeah, >> you can choose. I know it doesn't feel. like it, but you can choose how your. life plays out. Is it gonna be hard to. cut a family member off? Yeah. >> Yeah. >> But it's your life. >> Yeah. >> Like what's gonna feel better? Cutting a. family member off or being tormented by. them every day forever? You know,

there's something that I had this late. night thought. I'm sure there's probably. like a forum about this already, but for. me it was an original thought. Um, but I. was having a really hard time making a. decision and it it it was about. relationships and relationships in your. life and people that you love and care. about and everything. But ultimately, it. had been it had been something in my I. was thinking about for so long that I I.

kind of made this decision where I was. like, "This is a mistake that I need to. make." And that gave myself this. permission to. do what I was really really scared to. do, which setting boundaries with a. parent is very scary. >> And I think that we are always trying to. make the best decision, the right. decision. And a lot of us can get hung. up on that. And for me to just say like. this is a mistake that I need to make.

gave me this this type of freedom that I. hadn't I didn't I didn't really I have. before when making decisions. I gave. myself the grace that like maybe this. isn't the best decision but it's. something I need to try because this. isn't working right now and I don't feel. good. And it was really really really. helpful. It was really helpful. >> Yeah. That's beautiful. And I think that. um I don't know who else needs to hear. it, but if you do, just I think that. really helped me telling myself that.

it's okay if you make a decision that. might be a mistake, but like if you know. that you are constantly dealing with. something like this in a relationship. where you know your mom is traumatizing. you, then it's like it's okay to set a. boundary with her and it not go the way. that you might think it will go. It's. and it's okay to figure it out from. there. But if you you have to kind of. push yourself outside of your comfort. zone to make decisions that are very, very scary in order to find the best.

version of yourself and find the best. life for yourself. So, that's just what. I'll leave you all with. I appreciate. that. Yeah. So, we do get a little bit. of an edit from OP in the comments. Hey. guys, OP here. I forgot to mention some. things. First, the reason she's quote. paying for my wedding is because it's my. money. She charged me rent because I. lived with my parents for 6 years while.

dealing with mental health issues. They. have over $20,000. from me paying them and they said it. will be used for my wedding. >> Wow. >> That is why I want her to pay for it. >> Because I want her to stop having the. money and holding it over my head. Yeah. >> Second, I'm scared to go no contact. I. don't even know how to go about it. I'm. scared of my mom and she has a lot of. control over me. I also don't want to. lose my dad in the process. He's the.

only person who seems to care about me. and he's actually been a good person in. my life. Everyone on my mom's side is. just like her, though, so I don't think. I would mind going no contact with them. Third, sadly, my future mother-in-law. passed away when my fianceé was young, so I have no motherly figure to look up. to. Fourth, I honestly didn't know she. had my prom dress, and I don't know. where it is. I could find it if I was. alone in her house to look around. Honestly, I don't know what to do. There.

is a there's always going to be a lot of. fear with these type of things and with. with your dad. That is a that's a real. concern and that is a real possibility. But I think that you have to have also. faith in in the world and the universe. that one, your dad is still going to. make it work because he loves you. And. two, if he can't figure it out, then. there's other people in this world that. will give you more love, that will make. you feel more safe and more whole. And.

to, you know, try to. uh balance on this tight rope in order. to just continue to receive and give. love is going to burn you out so bad. And at some point, like you just won't. be able to keep it up. And so it almost. is like if you attempt this now and do. it and try to do it in a way that is, you know, not like scorched earth, but I. I think that, you know, it it will fall.

into place in the way that it should. And I think that dad, if you guys have a. strong relationship, he'll pull through. And then if not, he shows his true. colors. And it's like, damn, >> I don't need you either. >> I know. Sorry, that might have summed it. up and be a little too. >> simp. I genuinely think that's like kind. of the only way forward. And I know. $20,000 is a lot of money. That is that. is lifechanging money. Life-changing. money. But. >> honestly, >> I don't even know if they have that.

money anymore. But it's also just like a. it's a it's a mind it's a mind trick. >> No, it is. It's manipulation. I would. look at it like as you you paid rent in. a certain place and we a lot of us are. paying rent and I don't get my rent. money back and I would just look at that. and try try to like take away from cuz. they are pulling the strings. They are. holding this over you. >> No. And they will forever until you say. hey I see those strings snip snip. they're cut. >> Yeah. >> Keep the 20k.

>> I'm going to keep it. >> Yeah. Because I I think I can't imagine. It's like, okay, 20K is a lot of money. A lot of money. I don't even know if. they have it. They could have spent it. And this is her reason to sabotage. because she doesn't want to pay for your. wedding because guess what? She doesn't. even have that money anymore. And maybe. they do, but I just think that OP should. really reframe it and like and and think. about it as like I paid rent. And think. of that just as an entity that you pay. rent to like if you were to lease from.

somewhere else. and just be like that. was money that you know I was planning. on paying cuz I was paying rent and and. think about it that way because I do. think there's this like mental trick. where it's just like that's my money. that was promised to me but like. >> they're manipul they're using it as a. manipulation and this happens all the. time especially in like families that. are really wealthy like there's a lot of. strings being pulled in order to keep. the children the way you want them to be. and so I think it is this mind game and. it's just helpful for people if they can. really detach from that I I know it's.

hard. I can only imagine how hard it. would be. >> All of this emotionally, mentally, financially, maybe physically. I don't I. don't know. It's just like it's so hard. to pull away. But. >> I think you can and you deserve to and. you deserve to be happy and not reminded. about your weight all the time and you. deserve an amazing wedding. So, hey, if. your wedding looks a little different. because that 20K doesn't exist, that's. okay because it is going to feel lighter. and better and more fun. >> Yeah. This post is only 3 days old.

>> You don't have an update yet. >> Go and send OP some messages. I link all. of these stories on the YouTube version. Go and send her a message if you have a. Reddit account. Because I think as we've. seen so much in a lot of these Reddit. stories, when you get uplifted by a. community being like, "You don't deserve. that. That's okay. I had a mom like. that. I did this." If you get those. responses and that support, it becomes.

exponentially easier to then make the. change. So. >> go and send OP a message. >> Give that village. Give it up town. Yeah. >> Yeah. Exactly. So I will make sure the. link is in the description. >> But moving on to this next one. Let's get back into. domestic bliss. This is coming from r/. relationship advice titled, "My husband, 36, male, poops too much for me, 36, female, to feel comfortable having.

another baby with him." I'm sorry, what? I didn't think I would hear those words. all in one sentence. Okay, let's let's. go. >> My husband and I have been married for 7. years and together for 11. We have a 3. and 1/ halfyear-old. We're having. marriage issues for more reasons than I. have character limit or time to write. all down. In short, I feel he lacks a. sense of responsibility and proactivity. in our relationship. I've been harboring.

so much resentment, especially after our. first baby. I'm in therapy to work. through it myself. He has a bathroom. habit where he poops every morning. during our toddler's wake up, breakfast, and drop off time. Oh, okay. This is different. Every afternoon. after lunch and every evening during. bath and bedtime, which precludes him. from the hardest and most demanding.

times of everything every day. >> Whoa, whoa, whoa. What a piece of [ __ ]. Each bathroom session is an hour long. Edit: Maybe half pooping, half shower. time. I know he can change his timing. apparently on command because when we. need to be out and about, he somehow. finds a way to do it earlier or later or. just not go at all. Though I don't know. how much that affects him. >> I'm so annoyed. I'm so annoyed.

>> We both work full-time. I am 99% the one. who wakes up with the baby and gets him. ready for preschool. He may drive kiddo. to school after I've readied him. and. I'm the one to get baby bathed and ready. for bed most of the time unless I wait. for husband and baby goes to sleep. usually later than what I'd prefer. He. knows I've been delaying family planning. because of his uncertainties around work. looking to change jobs for the last 2. years now he's finally stabilized in his.

new role and when I bring up the topic. of another baby he always says it. depends on me. My son asks for a baby. sister because all of his friends have. baby sisters. His response is, "It. depends on mommy." But it doesn't. The. issues lack of awareness and proactivity. and needing me to tell him to do. everything or else he just doesn't feel. he needs to be involved or present. I. have with him from our first baby is. still unresolved. And I don't see how I.

can manage two kids while he's gone for. the most busy times of each day. Yes, I. also think about if I should even think. about having another baby with him. I. want to have two kids because we have. limited family in the US and I want to. make sure my son has someone who is. family when he gets older. Let's assume. I want to keep this relationship dot dot. dot. >> No. >> I asked him to go to the dock and talk. about his frequent bowel movements and. he said he did before and it's normal.

>> Okay. Okay. I feel like he prioritizes. himself and his needs before our. families because he seems to be able to. adjust when he goes, but as a default, he seemingly chooses the busiest times. of the day to do it. When I asked him. point blank how we're supposed to have a. newborn when he's gone for 3 hours every. day at the most critical times, he said. that his parents can take care of the. baby. His parents live 2 hours away.

It's not a come over and help once in a. while situation. This is a multi-year, if not lifelong, daily need that I. require from him. And his first response. is, "Someone else can do it. >> I'm so uncomfortable.". >> But I wanted him to see that this. unavailability is a concern of mine and. to actually put in some thought. I can't. stop him from pooping. It's not like we. have room or I have the will to house. his mom for 3 years to make up for my.

husband's need to poop. It's not like. she wants to live with us for 3 years. either. And this is just one specific. concern. There are plenty of other. concerns. >> Oh god. >> I don't know how to talk about this. concern without feeling dismissed, but. also not making him feel like I won't. let him poop. >> No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Okay. Uh, just I'm so uncomfortable right now.

cuz this is just so not Okay. Okay. First of all, let's try this. Take out any form of entertainment and. including his phone. Goes in with no. phone, no Apple Watch, nothing. See how. long it takes him to poop. >> Oh, he's probably got an iPad in there. for sure. And I would check under the. sink. I would check behind the toilet. I. would check in the toilet and make sure. there's not an iPad in a plastic bag in. the back of the toilet hiding. >> Good call. >> This man is choosing to be in the.

bathroom for 3 hours a day because he. doesn't want to be a parent. >> Yes. Exactly. He doesn't have to poop. for 3 hours a day. And if he does, he. needs a colonoscopy. This is not normal. >> Exactly. And that's the thing is that. like I maybe would have given a little. bit of grace if he wouldn't have gone to. the doctor. Him going to the doctor and. being like they said it's normal. Not. >> normal. Lies. Not normal. >> Lies. Any doctor would be like, "Colleonoscopy stat, bro.". >> Yeah, dude. >> Colonoscopy stat. Or it would have been. like, "Yeah, I went to the doctor and. I've got hemorrhoids. I've got this.

I've got that.". >> There would have been an answer, right? >> It's normal. No, it's not. >> No chance. >> You're a literal piece of poop. >> Oh my gosh. >> 3 hours every day and conveniently. during bedtime. Wake up. Drop off. He. doesn't want to be a parent. >> Why give him another reason. >> to not be a parent? Why give him. another? He wants to be a fun. >> My parents will do it.

>> Yeah. >> Your parents already raised you. They. don't want to raise your kid, too. Get. real. >> Yeah. >> Oh my gosh. That's brutal. >> And this is only one issue. The poop is. only one issue. >> There's so many other issues. >> That's And that's This poop thing is. enough. Give your kid a sibling from. another dude. Get divorced. Get. remarried to someone that actually. participates in your life and have a kid. with them. That's what I was going to. say. I was going to say, "Here's the. plan." The plan. Okay. I love the plan. Let's lock in. >> Let's lock in. Okay. Lock in.

>> First lawyer, divorce. Boom. Love it. Get them out of there. >> Bye. >> Second, date. Have fun. Explore. Get to. know yourself. And then. >> new man, supportive, loving, changes. diapers all the time. You know why? You. know what? And this is a true story. I. know. I I have a friend who got a new. man and he was like, "You did all the. heavy lifting and I'm going to change. every single diaper. I will not let you. change a single diaper.". >> There's multiple people I know that.

never had to change their baby's diaper. cuz the husband was like, "You're. breastfeeding. You're doing so much. I. got diapers.". >> And obviously like maybe one or two when. they the husband or partner or whatever. was gone. I literally think she's like. maybe I changed a month. of. >> diapers. Yeah, they're they're out. there. So, you're going to find one of. those. You're going to bring them in and. like she said, you're going to have. another kid, more family with a. supportive and then guess what? Every. other week in custody, you get to drop. your kid off and you get to go on a fun. little date night with your man who's.

actually great and everything's going to. be wonderful. >> What happens if you had a work trip? Because she also says she works and is. still doing 99% of the things. >> Did I read that right? Yeah. We both. work full-time. I am 99% the one that. does all the kids stuff. >> Like what happens if you need to go on a. work trip? What happens if you want to. take a vacation with your girls? Like. what happens then? >> Yeah. >> Is he still this incapable and is hiding. from your toddler in the bathroom for 3. hours while he gives the kid an iPad and. hopes he doesn't choke on a Cheerio?

>> Like genuinely, what does he do? >> Yeah. I would disappear. Like I would. make it so he has to participate. And. >> it's hard because at this point it's. like do you even trust him to watch your. kid? >> Yeah. >> Like this is not a functional. partnership. >> No. No. This sucks. >> When was this written? Is this recent? >> So it's from March 2026. I've had it in. a folder for ages. I have wanted to. >> talk about it and I was saving it for a.

parenting theme, but then I had this. theme pop up and I go, "Oh my god, the. poop guy. He's an OP. >> OP is still active on Reddit posting in. r/nails three months ago. >> OP is no updates. Is OP still with Let. me see pooper. So, we do get a bit of an update. I. mean, OP is commenting so so much. Like, I truly would not be able to get through. all these comments unless we had a. 5-hour episode. Like, there's a lot of. comments. Um,

>> so someone asks here, "What many things. does he do when he is working full-time. and gone 3 hours a day dodging parenting. and partner duties?" Genuine question. OP goes, "It's not amazing to be honest. Read to his son because before bedtime. was 100% me. Take him to bed and give. him a bath, which was 100% me at one. point. Come downstairs on weekends. before noon. Take kiddo to school. sometimes and feed him in the mornings. because I was doing 100% of that before. I snapped. Play with kiddo while I cook.

Don't call me to ask when I'd be back. when I'm gone for an hour. >> Okay. >> He waters my plants. That wasn't asked. He thought I'd appreciate that. And I. kind of do, except he barely wet the. soil. He does laundry more now, but I. probably do half of the washing and. drying. And I'm the one who puts. everything away. His own accord. He. feeds and litter box pets, does dishes, take out trash, does taxes, plan. vacations, pay portion of the bills, in. charge of finance portfolios.

That sounds like borderline nothing. still. >> That's I mean it's just not it's not it. We know we know that. Oh Opino said too. >> No, I know. So we do get like a kind of. an update in the comments. I spoke to. him again yesterday about how hurtful it. was when I brought up my concerns and. asked him for a plan and commitment and. how his first instinct is someone else. can do it. He insists he's in the right. because other people's parents help out. Why can't I take help from other people? I can't seem to convince him that this.

is not a helping out situation. It is a. lifelong everyday issue of seemingly. lack of awareness or willingness or. accountability on his part. >> But he doesn't see it that way. I'm also. certain it's not because he's. maliciously doing it. Like, he actually. 100% believes that this is a reasonable. response and a great solution to my. concern. Yes, his bowel movements are at. these critical times, but to him, it's. just whatever time is convenient for. him, waking up, after lunch, and.

settling down after dinner and clean up. at night. It just doesn't register to. him that these times are more important. than other times. He thinks he can still. help after, or if I needed him, I'd ask. To me, this is clearly weaponized. incompetence. There's no way. And OP said another. comment. He's not pooping in public. So, you tell me you had your morning coffee. or you went to work and you didn't have. to poop all day. >> Yeah. >> You're conveniently waiting for after. dinner, not even right when you walk in. that house door. >> This is weaponized incompetence cuz he.

doesn't want to parent. And honestly, even if it's not, it's like some of the. most dangerous people are people that. really do feel that really genuinely do. think and feel in a way that is toxic, not positive, not healthy, not not. contributing, like it it's just it. doesn't really matter. And I know I we. talk about this a lot and I I like to. like dig in to try to figure out like. what the intention is and where where. it's coming from because I do think. sometimes I can help people like deal. with it and move on or or maybe.

potentially be able to make a change. But I think in this case this feels like. like so ingrained that it doesn't even. matter whether he genuinely thinks it or. he's being like the incompetence like. and it it doesn't matter. It's just like. this is this is not you want another. kid. We we can hear that. And this is. not someone that you trust to have. another kid with. And so to to do so, I. think you're just going going to be. locking into even more.

>> turmoil. >> pain. pain. So it's so much turmoil. >> You shouldn't have to beg your partner. to to show up. No. OP goes on to say. like people ask why I stayed or how I. didn't know. Was it different before? I'm an independent and capable person in. my opinion. His lackings didn't bother. me as much before because I had my own. life that's completely separated from. him when we were dating. And I know I. can do stuff even if he doesn't know. how. But marriage, having to manage a. home together, make large decisions.

together, having kids, and sleep. deprivation, it's just too much, no. matter how capable I am. I realized over. time I do need his care and attention. along with his help. But I've already. built up resentment because I honestly. didn't understand why it didn't come. naturally to him as it did to me. And. it's not going to. He's also been. enabled now this long. >> Yeah. >> You have a three and a half-year-old and. he hasn't had to be a parent. >> He's not going to change. >> No. >> Unless you [ __ ] leave him. >> and even then it's it's a long shot.

>> Goes on to say like we both have. abandonment issues as children. Parents. left us in relatives care for a few. years, etc. Interesting that he'd then. recommend his parents helping. I'm just. tired and confused. I know him. He's not. a bad guy, as in he's not actively. malicious, but the end result is the. same. >> I'm sad, alone, disappointed, and hurt. >> I don't know how much longer I can last. under this type of environment. On his. side, I understand that he's feeling. attacked, ashamed, unappreciated, like.

he's trying the best he can, and I don't. see his efforts. I do. But the ROI of. all of his efforts is too low. Enough to. get him to a baseline of common sense, and it took a decade to do even that. I'm exhausted. If anyone has additional. thoughts outside of the extreme, I'd. love to hear it. For my kiddo, I want to. see it work out. Obviously, for my sake, I want it to work out, too. But why does. my relationship have to be so much. harder? like we are two waves who are.

crashing into each other and never in. tune and never synced up. Like we share. two languages and I still can't get him. to understand me. Yeah. I think I mean realistically this. is going to be a trap that you find. yourself in your brain continuously. unless you do make a change. And I do. mean a drastic change. And I'm sorry cuz. I know that you don't want I know you. don't want that. I know it just is hard. and scary and just so I I get it. But I.

do think too there's there's always a. chance you guys can get back together. >> Separate at the very least. >> Yeah. >> Separate, move out, >> co-parent, >> and see if he can be a willing. participant in your life. >> Yeah. >> Like he's not even a participant in your. son's life. And it's like you saying. like, I obviously don't want to separate. because of our kiddo. your kid might. have a more active and involved and. amazing dad if you do separate, right?

>> And you deserve a partner. Like, you're. working full-time and doing all the. house stuff and parenting. Like, you. deserve a partner who's going to split. it with you 50/50. >> And he could potentially move on, remarry, and find someone who doesn't. work and wants to be a stay-at-home. parent. And then there isn't this. balance. Yeah. He's which which again. not saying that OP did anything wrong at. all but like some people do like they. just they lean so hard and they they. once once they're enabled it's like.

they're they have a hard time kind of. like fending for themselves. >> And so I I agree with you like it it's. like there's all the whatifs right now. You're thinking of all of the possible. >> bad things but what about all the good. things? >> And if you and if you feel like this now. >> it's going to grow. And if he's not. willing to really really really really. work on this and change, then your. resentment's just going to grow and you. got and you're just going to like maybe.

it'll be better for like a little bit, but you'll probably be right here down. the road and and asking yourself the. same question. And so I again back to. that like just like a mistake that you. need to make comment that I made, which. maybe won't resonate with people, but. did for me, but I think that it's just. something where it's like separate. Try. that. Try it. >> And if you really think that it was a. mistake, then you can deal with that and. and try to make it work. >> Yeah. >> And he would be very okay if you were.

like, "I made a mistake. Let me move. back in." Like, I'm pretty sure he'd be. okay with that given that this is his. life, >> right? He's getting very pampered. >> Yeah. This post is now 7 months old. I. do think it is very real. OP is involved. in r/nails subreddits talking about. different shapes. Um, r/ hoya talking. about plants and telling someone that. it's just aphids on their plant and. giving them tips to rinse it with soap.

and water. It'll eradicate the pests. So, it is giving real account. I do see. us getting an update. I hope for OP's. sake, whatever path happens is just a. more balanced, healthy, enjoyable one. Yeah, >> cuz this doesn't sound fun. >> No, wishing you out there listening. >> The best, OP. >> Yeah, absolutely. We love you. >> We love you. >> You deserve better.

>> Okay, on to this next one. Are you ready. to wrap up with a doozy? >> A doozy. >> A doozy. >> What? What is a doozy? >> This is coming from our SL. relationships. It's titled, "My 25 female boyfriend, 24. male, got a fake number pretending to be. my ex just so he could talk to his. ex-girlfriend.". Okay, hold on. Hold on. I'm not good at. math. One more. What? What? Sorry if the.

title is confusing. I will explain best. I can. >> I feel heard. My boyfriend Max. My. ex-boyfriend James. my boyfriend Max's. ex-girlfriend, Brooke. Two weeks ago, I. received a text from an unknown number. claiming that they were my ex-boyfriend, James. I believed it was James as he did. write a status on Facebook saying that. he had a new number. It was just casual. talk. How are things? How's your new.

boyfriend? I replied platonically and. friendly as we did end on good terms. My. current boyfriend Max said if I am. talking to my ex then he should be. allowed to speak to his ex. Brooke stop. I said that's fine. You can speak to who. you want. Although you know I won't like. that. I wasn't happy because the only. reason I ever stopped him talking to. Brooke is because their messages were. always flirty and she still sent him.

nudes. Oh my. Okay, doozy. Now I understand. So, I. asked my boyfriend to block her and he. did, but he said that he would talk to. her anyways because I'm now speaking to. James, my ex. >> This is insane. >> That was that. A few days later, Max. went to make dinner and I was in the. bedroom. I was looking for some socks. from Max's drawer and I found a cheap.

mobile phone that I had never seen. before. I looked on it and it was the. text that I sent to James. I was livid. >> This is insane, you guys. Okay. He was pretending to be my. exboyfriend. Yeah. I confronted Max straight away and. he admitted that he wanted to get back. in touch with Brooke. And he thought if. I spoke to my ex, James, he could use. that as an excuse to then be able to.

talk to Brooke. Just go back to Brooke, dude. Don't make this so complicated. I. am pissed off. >> Jiminy Crickets. >> I'm really angry that he had to do this. behind my back. I asked to see his. messages between Brooke and they are all. flirty and just borderline. inappropriate. How old are these people again? 25. 24. Boyfriend. X is 25. Brooke is 20. >> It's all we got.

>> Okay. >> TLDDR. My boyfriend pretended to be my. ex so he could speak to his ex. We live. together and own a dog. Is this. salvageable? Where do I go from here? >> Not salvageable. You move out. You take. the damn dog. Did you say that in your head when you. read this one? Cuz that that Oh, that. was great. Then you just thought that on. the fly. >> Yeah. >> I love that. >> Thank you. Okay. That was great. Like,

>> damn. >> That was such a That was wonderful. I. always I'm a big fan of like calling. back like '9s or early 2000 um movies. and just Oh, yeah. That was that was. >> I wish I could do a Jennifer Kulage. voice. Like. >> that was pretty good. Oh, I wasn't. trying to do her. But like I did. envision her in my head like taking the. dog or whatever she like her voice is so. iconic. I still need to watch White. Lotus, but we're not going to because we. really do need to. >> unpack this. >> Yeah. Um he's a bit of a nut.

>> It's so funny cuz he's he's like such a. [ __ ] but like in he like his [ __ ]. little mastermind. It's like it's slightly impressive for a. [ __ ]. Oh my gosh. Oh my god. >> But no, no, I'm sorry. I usually do try. really hard to like find the benefit of. the doubt. >> Yeah, >> I can't. No, it's a no. It's a no. I.

think what you said, perfect. Take the. dog, leave. There's just no. The. disrespect is so loud in so many ways. and it's just like, you know, you know. you don't want to do that. You know. that's not the love of your life. You. know that is not your husband. That's. not your future husband. Your future. husband would never do that. Okay? You. know that your future husband would not. be dying to unblock his ex and text her. flirty [ __ ] and get nudes. >> and and and be willing to deceive you, lie to you, like pull a fast one on you.

Like stalk your ex cuz clearly he's out. there watching his Facebook too. >> Like like a that's No, no, no, no. Your. future husband's not doing that. Also, what's crazy is he texted her and was. like, "How's your new boyfriend?". Basically like wanting to know what she. thinks of him. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> What's the tea, girl? How's that new. boy? >> You packing? Is it good? Like, are you. having fun? Like, what? What? Yeah. He's. very.

>> not confident. Has a wandering. eye. And this just not This ain't good. There's just too many betrayals that are. just screaming. >> Why is he trying so hard to talk to his. ex? There's so many red flags. I hid the. red flags cuz I'm like red flags aren't. spooky, but they might they might be the. spookiest of all. I need a bouquet of. them. >> You're good. You're good these days. Look at you. You're quick. >> You're very complimentative of me today. And I'm like I'm not doing that much.

though. >> You're doing great. I'm a big fan. >> You're doing great, sweetie. >> Oh, that was funny though. I I was. thinking that too because I genuinely. like I feel like I always forget about. the red flags and now they're not here. and I keep thinking like where do I grab. the flag and I normally don't anyway so. I'm like now that it's gone. >> you want what you can't have sometimes. you know gets the best of us. >> There is uh one of the top comments here. you have separate problems here a. partner who is willing to tell really. huge lies impersonating someone else is. a huge lie and who tests you covertly.

Yeah. Two, a partner who bean counts. What I'm allowed and what you're allowed. must be exactly equal regardless of. context. And three, a partner who has. flirty conversations with others. I also. like just back to this whole thing with. the bean counting. What I'm allowed and. what you're allowed must be exactly. equal. It's not equal because he's. pretending to be your ex. You're not. actually talking to your ex. You had to.

manipulate the situation and create a. false narrative. >> and lie to me just so you could talk to. your ex. >> Wild. >> If you want to talk to her so bad, talk. to her or just like break up with me and. go be with her. >> Yeah, he's a freak for sure. They go on. to say deliberate premeditated planned. lies is beyond the pale. Bean counting. isn't going to age well. The wanting. attention from others is kind of gross,

but you could choose to overlook it and. live with it or give him an outlet for. it. Some version of opening up the. relationship. Up to you what you think. However, the bean counting doesn't bode. well for a negotiated solution. Someone. else. What the [ __ ] That's so crazy. He's obviously super invested in getting. those nudes from his ex. So, WE DO GET. AN UPDATE. Thank you to all of those who answered. and helped me think clearly about the. situation. I broke up with him the same. day I posted on Reddit. Oh, that's my.

girl. I posted on Reddit and 2 hours. after I ended it. He didn't take it too. well, but I followed through and I left. him. He didn't seem that bothered to be. honest. I bought my dog and all of the. vet bills are under my name, so I. legally own the dog. If he wants to take. me to court for him, he can. But I've. looked into it and he won't win. >> About all of this situation, I'll never. understand why he did what he did. Surely, it would have been easier to. just message Brooke behind my back to. begin with. Instead, he went to extreme.

lengths. He wanted to be a free man. Freely freely messenger. My only guess. is because he felt guilty for talking to. his ex and wanted to make himself feel. better. >> Yeah. No. Yeah. It's It's a hilarious um. equation. I don't know. None of it makes. sense to me. I moved out of our home. straight away and I lived with my. parents while I looked for a property. I. found a place and I'm moving in 2 weeks, so that's something. Anyways, thank you. all for the support and advice. I must.

have looked crazy for posting first and. not dumping, but I finally came to my. senses. No, >> thanks again, Reddit. >> No, girlfriend. You did not look crazy. The thing is is that when we're wrapped. up in someone and something and living. with them, it's like sometimes we really. we really do just got to. >> blinders. You got blinders on. >> We do need a little bit of like. reassurance and we got to like pull. ourselves out. And that's why it's like, okay, we sit over here and we're not. like cheering for every breakup, but at.

the same time, we're cheering for people. finding the best version of themselves. Yeah. You also have to realize with. these Reddit stories, like you're. typically hearing some of the worst of. the worst. Like no one not typically. people don't go to Reddit saying, "Oh my. god, my boyfriend's amazing." I was. talking to one of my friends who like. had like a couple of complaints about. her partner and and I was like, "You. should go to Reddit." Well, I was just. like I was like, "Okay, given given the. bars in hell on Reddit," I was like, "He's doing pretty good.

He's doing pretty good in comparison to. the things I've heard." Um, but no, I. know it's it's. >> No one's perfect. No, but they're. usually not this level of that's that's. bad. That's bad. Yeah. And I do think. that like I totally understand people. posting because it's like we do get. wrapped up in things and that becomes. our life and our familiarity and it's. it's really freaking hard to like leave. and it's really scary to consider a. different option. And I think sometimes. again we just need that village of. support. And if it comes from Reddit,

there's there's a lot of good people. there that are on the two take. subreddit. Like there's a lot of people. that are like are are there that are. >> willing to help, looking to help, and. like have your best interest, which is. just like. >> these all anonymous people, but I mean. mostly, but at the same time, it's like. you could kind of like feel more comfort. in that. And the fact that there's these. people who don't know you or or anything. about you to like have preconceived. notions, they just no stake in the game,

unbiased, just trying to be a good. person and help advice. >> No, I love it. I will say something. that's like been sneaky amazing for me. lately is the community on Patreon. Like. I've always said the community on. Patreon is so nice and supportive and. yay, yay, yay. But we have a couple. different chats on Patreon and there's. so many people that don't want to share. their stuff on Reddit or like they post. on Reddit and it gets taken down right. away and they'll post in the chat being. like, "You guys, am I overthinking this?

Like, did I [ __ ] up? Like, am I wrong. here?" And everyone replies to them in. the chat being like, "No, girl. That's. crazy." Like, and so supportive. And it. feels it feels really cool too because. like a lot of people on Patreon have. their profiles, you see pictures and. it's it really is this like. >> special community and there's people. that have been like, "Wait, you're in. blank? I'm in blank. Let's meet up.". >> So we have people making actual friends. on Patreon, too. We have people falling. in love over this podcast.

>> I know. >> Like the live shows, which we should. probably do one soon. I know. I know. Oh, the for you fest or whatever it was. got cancelled. >> It did. >> It got cancelled. They Why? >> They never made like a formal. announcement and they said they would. >> Oh, no. >> I know. >> I know. I'm working with our Spotify. family right now. We're definitely. trying to put together something special. for the holidays for you guys. Maybe a. show sometime soon. I do want to go back.

on tour. I think just with life though. and how busy, I don't know if I can do a. nationwide tour. So, yeah, >> it might be like major cities to start. and then see how how things go. But I do. want to see you guys. I love love love. meeting and seeing you guys in person. It it really like revitalizes me and. like. >> makes me have a passion again for like. the show. Not that I I don't on the. daily, but it it really just like makes. it all feel so real and special. >> I've been meeting a lot of you in person.

lately, and I actually took like I keep. a notes sheet now. I just started it. where I've met people like I met Olivia. at the Hollywood Bowl. I met Quinn at. Northwoods Tap, Natalie, Miriam, Ryland, James, Ivy, Susan, and Abe at the State. Fair. I met Allison and Courtney at the. MSP airport. I just met Faith. We met. Faith at HomeGoods. >> Faith. So, I love when you guys say hi. in person. And it really again makes it. feel real and just.

>> special and like we have this community. like we're we're all in this together. >> Yeah. It's just so it's so special. So. >> say hi to us if you see us. I know you. love it too. >> You will always find me when I'm looking. my worst. >> I know. I afterwards like when me and. were at HomeGoods I was like I've really. got to start dressing better when I go I. was wearing like a white sports bra and. a white tank top that like I was I can't. remember what I was doing but I rubbed. against something like black so it just. looked so dirty.

the day before that was like that was. like our second time at HomeGoods in. like two days the day before we ran into. someone we knew from college and I'm. like I look like a [ __ ] wreck like. what are we doing? So yeah, you it's. it's kind of like a a calling beacon. If. I look my worst, I will see you guys. >> You will find me. You will find us. You. probably do a double take cuz you're. like, is that her? >> Oh my gosh. >> But say hi to us. We love you guys. >> It makes us really happy for sure. >> Yeah. And hey, if you want that 10hour.

episode. 1 million subscribers on YouTube before. episode, I would say it has to be before. episode like. >> 298. So I have at least 2 weeks to put. together 10 hours. I'm like obsessed. with this. I just think that this is. going to be so fun. Like they're. genuinely going to do it because why? Like that's soared. It's so fun. No, they're going to do it. They're going to. make it happen. I believe in you guys. I. thought editing the updates episode was. bad. 10 hours of two outakes. It's going.

to be incredible. It's going to be. incredible. And I will say I'll tell you. right now, I'll even give you this. 1. million before episode 298. I will give. you 10 hours of tht and every single. story will have an update. >> Oh my god. Are you sure you're Are you. Are you're okay? >> Uh-huh. >> Okay. >> Better get cracking, guys. follow, subscribe, and also get on it. Also, plan your cross country trip because you. have now a podcast that you can listen. to the entire way.

>> Yeah, I do think I think we mapped it. out and I think it would release around. like Christmas or New Year's, so it's. like perfect for holiday travel. >> Oh my god. Yeah, you were just killing. it. >> I'm trying real hard. I'm trying. >> Thank you guys. Head over to Patreon. We. will be doing another theme of biggest. op over there. I have a lot more of. these stories. A lot of big haters. Big. big big capital B. Pumpkin head. All. cavs. B I G haters.

>> Thank you. And until next time. >> Until next time. >> Bye. >> bye guys.