"Funny, Funny" - Trevor Noah - (It's My Culture)

I go down to the Pharmacy one day. I have to buy pain medication for my mother. so I get there with the script, the woman's behind the counter. She's like, "Hi Sir, can I help you with anything?". I said yes, I need to fill this prescription please. she goes, "Okay, let me just check here, that's for Mrs Noah?". I said yes, yes. "Okay, hold on. Oh, I am sorry Sir. We don’t have any stock there.". I said what do you mean no stock? She said, "Yeah, we got nothing of that medicine". I said well, when are you getting more? "Oh, we are not gonna get for a few months hey. there's a back-order problem".

Okay, so what do you. My mom needs the pain medication. She's like, "Yeah, I'm sorry.". Oh, well. "Just joking! you should have seen your face, hey. I've also got jokes there Trevor, I've also got jokes.". I'm like, you got jokes? my mom's in pain, she got shot. you got jokes? this is not the time for jokes, what the hell. It's not funny lady! It's too soon, it's just too soon!

it's too soon. Ah, Hospitals. I’m not a fan. I had to go back for my surgery, voice surgery. One of the most stressful days of my life. I am there 5 o’clock in the morning, I’m sitting in the waiting area. There’s this woman that checks you in for you surgery.

She’s not friendly at all, she’s not even trying to make people feel good. She’s like, “next!”. And you will come up, “next!”. It’s my turn and she’s like, “Name!”. Trevor. “Trevor”. “Surname!”. I said: “Noah”. “Noah”. “Noah?”. “Trevor Noah?”. I said: “yes”. “Trevor Noah?”. I said: “yes”. “The comedian?”. “The one who’s making the jokes, he?”.

“Yes”. “The jokes about us when we are on strike, he?”. “No, not that one. This one.”. “It’s another one, it’s not me.”. She’s like, “Yea!”. “Yea, you are here now, he?”. “Hmm, it’s not funny now, hey?”. “No, it’s not funny.”. She’s like, “Yea, where’s your jokes now?”. “They’re in the car”. “What?” “No, nothing. Nothing.”. “Hmm, funny guy. So what you doing here? You going to surgery?”.

I said: “yes”. “Why you talking like that, what’s wrong?”. “I have got a thing.”. “Oh, the voice is broken, he?”. “Did you break something, what’s wrong is it sore?”. I said: “yes”. “Oh, I’m sorry. It’s sore?”. I said: “yes”. “You want the medicine?”. I said: “yes”. “okay, let me just check.”. “Oh, they say laughter is the best medicine.”. “Yea, so why don’t you just make a joke and fix it?”. “Just make a joke on the inside funny guy.”. “Even me, I can do it for you.”.

I can make a joke, I can fix that. Knock, knock. Who’s there?”. “Nobody, yeah!”. “Funny, funny.”. “Funny, Next!”. It's not funny. it's my life. oh, welcome guys. Welcome. just in time. just started the show. did he just ask you what did I miss, what did I miss?

why are you guys so late, what happened? Eish! Eish, see patience, patience. "Eish, late, Eish". go away, go away. Luckily the voice surgery was a success. you know, I had a great doctor. I was blessed enough to be able to heal.

and I can do the shows again. most important thing though, is the tea. and as weird as it sounds, I have to drink it. it's a mixture of Rooibos. lemon, honey, ginger, sea salt and bicarb. disgusting, but it works. but it's great, I can do my shows in South Africa. I can do my shows in Southern Africa. which is fantastic, so I'm doing that. going out into Africa, have you ever been into Africa Sir?

No, what's your name if you don’t mind me asking? Gerhard, Gerhard. Never been out into Africa. No, the reason I said out into Africa. is because this is not Africa. No, South Africa is not. This is Africa Lite guys. this is. don’t get it twisted, when I say Africa. I mean Africa, like Africa, Africa. No jokes. No white people, nothing nothing. it's just you in the streets Gerhard, just you. just you, if you see like one other white person. you're happy, yay! it's your reflection.

I've started doing shows out there Gerhard, you know. Places like Namibia, fantastic. Botswana as well, beautiful. Wanted to go to Zimbabwe, but I skipped it. No, because I don't want to die. That's the only reason. You laugh but I mean this, you cant make jokes. about Robert Mugabe in Zimbabwe. if you do this, you get arrested. and get sent to prison for mocking the president, right. so I know I would go there, and I wouldn’t be able to resist.

I would be like, "Hey, Mustache hey". and then, I'm in jail. which normally wouldn’t be such a bad thing. because what would happen normally in an international incident like that. is normally your president would just come there. he would ask you to be released and taken back to your country. but now, I don’t know. if that guy. will come and fetch me.

I can see him sending Mugabe the e-mail now. "It's fine, Rob". "keep him". so I am not taking any chances.