Trevor Wallace | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #633

If you missed out on any of the holiday. merch, um, which I get it for sure, uh, it's a busy time. We still have stuff. available if you're interested. Uh, we've got the Bobby collab and the Gang. Gang collegiate hoodies and the gang. totes. Uh, you can check it all out and. see what speaks to you, if anything, at. the vonstore.com. And, uh, thank you so much for your. support. Today's guest is a stand-up comedian. He's a content creator. He has his own.

podcast called Stiff Socks and his new. tour is happening right now called Alpha. Beta Male. You can go check that out. I'm grateful for his return. Today's. guest is Trevor Wallace. [music]. That's like. >> That's crazy. I'm going start poaching.

I don't give a [ __ ] dude. >> I've had people poach me. Mr. Beast has. taken some of my guys. >> Has he really? >> Yeah, dude. >> No way. >> I'm poaching. I don't give a [ __ ]. >> Mr. Beast took some of your guys. Let's. start right there. That's wild. >> Mr. Beast. Well, I mean, he hires just. the best of the best. And what he does. is he'll like kind of like It's not him. It's like people who work under him just. finding all the best people in the. industry. And honestly, I I don't blame. him because I've worked with some people. that like the the line on the resume is. so strong because you get them in you're. like this is a very simple thing, the.

simple edit. You can do this, right? Mock mock this edit and this edit and. they're like, yeah, yeah, yeah. And you. get it back and you just want to be. like, you know what, [ __ ] it. Color in the. lines first. Let me see that. Spell your. name alphabetically first. >> Yeah. People will put trap beats and. [ __ ] to edit. >> But he just takes the best of the best. and um like the people in that town. Where's Greenville? >> Greensboro. >> maybe. It's it's near ECU wherever that. one is. >> Okay. >> And that's a they got a pirate as a. mascot which 2026 I don't know if you.

can do that anymore. >> Greenville, North Australia. >> Everybody. Yeah. Pirate. >> Shirley will show up and bust all your. mascots. >> And honestly, after losing a leg, why. would you still want to be on a ship? That doesn't seem like a very like. steady place to be. There a lot of lot. of wobbles going on there. And I love. Mr. Beast. I'll say that. He's a good. guy, but he's smart for just taking the. best of. >> Well, I think at a certain point you. realize like. >> it's almost good. It's like It's like if. you have a hot girlfriend and she gets. hit on at a bar, I'm not mad. >> Yeah. >> I'm mad if nobody hits on my girlfriend. >> Yeah, dude. If somebody just comes up. and talks to you and you introduce me.

your girlfriend and they don't even look. at her again. >> Oh yeah, dude. I think the most. disrespectful thing you can say to a guy. after they you like show them your their. girlfriend, be like, "Oh man, as long as. you're happy. >> stuff. As long as you're happy. Not. anymore. I'm going to take my own life. [laughter]. >> She's She's free now. >> Yeah, bro. I'm going to definitely go. get her hair braided or something or. like get her rode up or something. You. have to do something then. >> But then if somebody looks at your. girlfriend three times, dude, you're. like, "Whoa, dude.". >> You get two free glimpses. It's like. Monopoly. You get two free out of jails.

You get two free glimpses. >> and they better be up top glimpses. They. better I mean looking at her hairline, >> clavicles up. >> Yeah. But it is funny that like if. you're and I don't think this happens. the older you get in life but like when. you are tell go on [laughter]. >> sciatica as you get older it's not as. much but like when you start dating. somebody it's almost like your boys are. like yo check her out she's hot right. look at her tits. >> Yeah. >> And then those people get married. eventually and you're like I've seen. your wife's tits. >> Yeah. Why am I even at the wedding? I've.

se I've seen them. >> Yeah. I think it's wild. Like that's one. of the things that I think could be wild. sometimes about if if somebody marries. like somebody that has like a lot of. Only fan stuff out there and stuff like. that. If that can be cuz I don't look at. Only Fans, but I don't know. And some of. the stuff might just be photos. I know. some of it sex, but um but. >> it's all. >> it's all SCX. It's It's crazy. You're. like surely they don't go all the way. And you do one Reddit search and they're. they're in the dark webs. >> They're going all the way. >> All the way. >> Oh my god. >> It's crazy. Well, I think they do it. because it's like behind so many pay.

walls. are like nobody's going to see. this. But. >> do they even have a shirt on or anything. or nothing? >> No, I don't even know if they have the. AC on. It's like a sweaty place. I don't. know, man. It's There's always music in. the background. It's always like Whiz. Khalifa like Young, Wild, and Free, and. you're like, I don't know if this is the. most I feel like this is a song for like. a high school graduation. [laughter]. >> Yeah, dude. If you're getting kind of. shanked down somewhere, I think you got. to have the AC on. I feel like. >> AC on and windows down or like the the. blinds down. It's too bright in there.

Oh, yeah. But then if some of the dark I. will say this, having been a user of. pornography, >> you're still off. >> Uh I've had some setbacks. >> Yeah. And what sparked that setback? >> Oh, [snorts] I'll tell you. >> Not to trigger anything. >> No, dude. >> Did you trigger something that night? >> Frustrated, lonesome, >> uh laying there like reading and then. being like, "Oh, this book isn't. enough." You know, like and it's just a. book. It's like a good. >> You have photos or no? >> It's like All's Quiet on the Western. Front or something. It's like, "Oh, this. book isn't enough to make. you know.

>> Oh yeah. You talking about the dust. bowl? >> Yeah. >> Um I mean there are a couple scenes in. uh Grapes of Wrath that kind of like. >> Really? >> Well, there is a very like there's a. scene where the mom at the end or a. woman who's breastfeeding at the end has. to breastfeed a person because like an. adult because they just don't have. anything to eat. Yes. >> I've been hungry before [clears throat]. though. >> But that's like I mean that's uh Oh, we're already on Reddit. It's about to. happen. We're two clicks away from some. tits. >> We Yeah. Well, let's back out of here.

because I'm already. >> Well, I'm already I'm looking at the. Louis CK book behind you and something. about that cover like that that feels. like a little. >> Oh, this is um. >> But yeah, dude. I think that's the kind. of thing that gets me, you know, and if. I haven't been meditating, I have a. little like a moment of peace before. like. >> I like reactental masturbation. Yeah. >> Where it's like I'm just not as. reactive. It's like I have a moment of. like, okay, well, what do I really want. to do here? You know, because then I'll. jerk off, then I feel bad. That type of. thing. But overall, it's got. >> I mean, it's instant. The second it.

leaves a body, it's like come out, regret in and it's like a baton. Like. there, it's like a handoff. It's like. goodbye, good night, and then you're. just sitting there with shame. >> How are you in hotel rooms? Are you like. after shows, are you like, okay, I can. just go straight to sleep or you're just. kind of sitting there pacing a little. bit? >> Oh, man. I mean, I think it's a variety. of stuff, you know? I think I don't know. if hotel rooms do it for me anymore, which is kind of sad because that used. to be the thing. Like you get in a nice. room, you got to jerk off right when you. get in there.

>> Just. >> That's the key card. [laughter]. Yes. Like, oh, I thought this thing runs. on DNA. You're just spraying on the. freaking on the on the on the swipe out. front. >> Exactly. And then you stick the do not. disturb sign on the nut. But I just feel. like any room I just it's just not home. So, it's always going to feel awkward. It's just like the the AC the AC needs. to pick a lane. It's on then it's off. >> Yeah. >> It's on then and and you're like why you. edging me with with AC? >> The AC does feel like it's edging all. the time. >> And it's a crazy time of year I think.

too in the winter you can never get the. heat right in your house or your room, whatever it is. The heat is the worst. cuz it's like it's blazing hot for a. second and then it kind of disappears. really fast. It's like I don't know. >> All that stuff's kind of hectic, dude. I. mean getting through the winter, getting. through these days, I kind of I never. want the year to start. That's what I. realize. I do not. Yes. It's like I'm. still like trying to relax and chill and. the year just starts back so fast. >> You've been taking a break though. Yeah. How you feeling? Good. >> Yeah. I'm feeling better for sure.

>> But I want to just keep doing that. And. that's fine. But I think the calendar is. just like here we're going again. >> You know, it's. >> I feel that it takes me a while to like. calm down and then the second I start to. calm down, that's when it starts ramping. back up. >> Yeah. It's like to if you really need to. enjoy a vacation, you let's say you want. a week off, you almost need like two or. three days before and two or three days. after to like build in and then to like. build up to get out. >> Do you think like um do you think it's. tougher for people to find like spouses. and stuff these days because there's so.

much like data like so many people that. like you've dated your friends and all. that kind of stuff. Does that ever. affect you think at all? >> What's the question? Like if you wanted. to find like a girlfriend or something, is it tough? Cuz it's like, "Oh man, my. buddies date her." It's like there's. just so much. >> Oh. Uh, in the same town, I guess it. just depends on like the the town. capacity. I mean, like. >> where my dad grew up, it's like 5,000. people. Yeah. I mean, at that point, it's like you might have to run it back. once or twice. >> You might have to date somebody you. dated years back just to be like, "We've.

hit the cycle." You know, at a strip. club on like a Tuesday when it's slow. and then like the same dancers come out. >> Yeah. >> Every like three songs or like. >> with a new hat or whatever. >> Yeah. Exactly. And they just put like L. in front of their name. There's Diamond. Now there's L Diamond. >> You're like, "Is this Spanish Diamond?". >> Yeah, Lina. >> L Diamond. That's And she's next. >> I think it just depends on the town. >> Yeah, dude. >> I think that's why guys randomly just. move, though. >> [ __ ] I'm going to Oregon. >> Yeah. [laughter]. >> And dudes will be like, "Hey, is there. just some dude will send out like a. tweet like, "Hey, is there some good.

puss out in Oregon?" or whatever. >> The crazy [ __ ] to me. >> And some dudes will reply like, "Bro, no. puss in Oregon, dude.". >> Yeah, bro. and they're with a girl right. there. They're with a wife. The craziest. [ __ ] is the people that like, and I'm. sure you've had people like this on your. tour. I I have a girlfriend now, so I. don't do this, but like I don't like. there'll be guys on your tour who are. like swiping in the next city. >> They're like meal prepping swipes. >> Yes. >> They're like, "Oh, I'm I'm already in. Chattanooga. >> Yeah, >> we're in San Diego, brother. What the. hell you want?". >> Yeah. I've had some openers that are. like that. They're already in the next. city and they're like, "Oh, I got a girl.

maybe coming through and I'm like, "How'd you meet her?" And like I met her. on Hinge or whatever. We're we're we're. together now. It's crazy. [gasps]. >> Yeah. The the pre- swipes. I don't know, man. It's I guess I don't know. I guess. it's like kind of like ordering an Uber. for the next day or something. I like. there's some smart strategy behind it. >> That's Uber Eats, dude. >> Yes, [laughter] sir. >> Yes, sir. Uber Eats out, >> dude. A lot of crazy stuff. What did I. see that there was a one girl um Trish. Trisha Pis is running for office. Did.

you see that? >> Do you know her kids' names? >> Uh-uh. >> I don't know why you would. Um, I don't. know why I do, but her kids' names are. something. Can Can you pull that up. somewhere? Someone. It's fun. Yeah, it's. uh Elvis and Aquaman, who should be in. the new Jason Mamoa movie. >> And Malibu Barbie. >> Malibu Barbie. Yeah, Malibu Barbie. Elvis and Aquaman Moses. And they're. kids, so I don't want to talk [ __ ] but. >> their names follow a theme of pop. culture and iconic figures with Aquaman. being a nod to his cancer, water sign, birth month, and the movie. Wow.

>> And their fourth kid is is Charlie Kirk. >> No. re reincarnated, [laughter]. >> but this is her right here. So, I never. thought of Is this is this real? >> She's running for president. >> She's running for office, I believe, for. Congress. >> I never thought of myself as a political. person until I started having kids and. realizing like the world could be just. so. dystopian for real. By the time they. >> Is she doing a mukbang while running for. office? >> That [laughter] is crazy. That's a good. way to keep attention though. >> Why the [ __ ] wasn't Biden eating goddamn.

overnight oats [laughter] while doing. his campaigns? Fine was [ __ ] eating. ideas from years ago, bro. That guy was. [ __ ] eating his words, bro. Can you. even imagine the pain that Biden had to. go through each day when they put him. back up there and they're like, "Okay, you're going back up there.". >> Yeah. I feel like. >> And he didn't have any clue what he was. doing. He was like, you've seen people. >> He's like Aaron Rogers. He's like, he's. still playing, but he just wants to be. on a beach on Iawaska. >> Yeah. >> He just wants to be away. I I I I every. day I think who would want to be.

president? Oh, every day you have people. yelling at you. >> It seems like the worst. But I just when. he went out there and they put him on. that bike, they knew he couldn't do it. It's all crazy. >> That was the first hit from. another country was the bike. >> Yeah. When he fell off that bike or when. that bike went. >> That was somebody That was somebody in. like North Dakota being like, "Let's. take him out. Deflate the tires.". >> Yeah. Let's wait one of these pedals. It. would only take a little bit. What did.

What did she say? What else did she say? Let's see. Is this series that she's. running? And for those you don't know, Trisha Pis is a um she's. >> she's done everything. She's uh really. just culturally well known online on. YouTube and Tik Tok and everything. And. I I believe at one point she did uh. YouTuber and influencer. >> PN. um announced play expressed a desire to. make a difference amid horrible stuff in. California, the world, calling the idea. crazy but vivid from a dream she had. She plans to run as a right-in candidate. initially and then self-fund her p.

campaign. Her potential slogan potential. slogan is California could be good. Hey, that's a moderate a kind of that's a. moderate step. >> Could be good. >> Yeah, [laughter] it's fair. >> Could be all right. Not bad. >> Could be good. >> It's a fair thing to take with you. >> Yeah. It's like I feel like that's like. uh two levels, you know, when you go to. like a hot chicken place and they have. all the different levels and like Make. America Great Again is the number one. Could be good is like the starting. point. Like California could be good. >> and then it's like Texas will [ __ ] your. ass and then it's like make America. great again.

>> Yeah. >> Wow. That's wild. And what is some of. Does she have a like a a policy? What is. she kind of running on? Does she have um. any priorities? Is she saying? Does she. say it in that speech? What is going on? >> How do you even run for president? Like. where do you sign up? >> Well, this is Congress and Congress. There's a lot of Congress people. So, >> is Congress like the farm league for. baseball? >> Total of 535 members of Congress, dude. That's like the Brea improv. >> Yeah. Yeah. That felt imagine a That. fills the improv. >> Odd bomb so hard. 100 serve in the US.

Senate and 435 serve in the House of. Representatives. But can you go back to. what her priority was? Can we get to. that? >> Really dark and depressing things. But. getting a hold of my mental health means. being able to not only deal with my. emotions and spirals and triggers, I. need to start dealing with like the. world. I'm going to start my state. And. I really think my slogan for my name. will just be like California could be. good. [laughter]. >> Okay, this is wild. But good for her.

>> What would your slogan be for Nashville? >> Uh, Nashville could be quieter. >> Let's get this [ __ ] hype. Whies. >> Hey, >> I [laughter] think that could be it. [ __ ]. >> And others. >> And others. >> Yeah. Type [ __ ]. >> Yeah. Who's ready for some Tennessee. type [ __ ] No. >> Tennessee type [ __ ] is way better than. Titans. >> Tennessee type [ __ ] Tennessee type I I. mean that's the first improvement. You. should be a head coach somewhere. >> The Tennessee type. >> You're at a lot of games like you know. ball. >> We've had a great deal of games, man. >> Well, the the college is great. The.

university I mean Cam Ward, shout it to. him. He seems like a great kid. He's. he's going to go far. >> He seems like a nice guy over there for. sure. I I mean I only met him one time, but he seems nice. Uh yeah, they've had. a rough season over there. They're. looking for a new coach right now. So I. think they're in a lot of rebuilding. going on over at the Titans. >> Totally. Well, they should hire Trisha. Pis. >> because the Titans could be good. >> Could be good. >> Could be good. >> Dude, I You're right. It's kind of the. perfect motto. If she were to win. office, the freaky singer, it says here, um, and this is The Hill, uh, said her. primary goal would be to raise the age.

requirement for participating in adult. entertainment to 25. I think that's probably a good idea. >> Is that because that's when like the. brain is fully developed to be like, "Hey, should I be throwing my posts. online?" Yeah, I think well I guess. that's I mean I think it's up it's. obviously up to the women but I think. having a better understanding of what. you want to do before you kind of lock. yourself into a video or something is. probably is probably a good idea. >> It is crazy. You can get fully nude on. the internet before you can get a bush. light. You can show Bush before getting. a bush light. >> Yeah, 18 pop it out but you can't go to.

a bar. >> That is kind of wild. >> But that was like the original stance. with like the war. for us. Like we can. fire for this country at 18, but it. can't get a goddamn course latte. >> Yeah, >> that's now we've just rotated. Women can. show puss, but they can't get a. Pacificico. >> Well, that's what I'm running for. >> Yeah, dude. Yeah, you could you could. storm the beaches of Pacificico, but. [laughter] but you can't get one, you. know? That's kind of the crazy part, dude. The wildest uh maybe they'll do. like a like a mashup like the army and.

only fan. It'll be like army fans. >> Maybe they'll do like a mashup. There's. kind of an army going. There's like a. war going on in the O of world right. now. Like I don't know if it's like. fascinating or I don't think we should. draw any more attention to it, but like. there's some girl like selling a course. and everyone's kind of yelling at her. who's. >> selling settling a course. >> She's selling a course on like how to be. like an o, but she's doing like Andrew. Tate but for like popping it online like. like how to like. >> how to do it and do it. Well, >> I guess maybe it's about like different. positions or something. I think it's.

like how to like market like like if you. want to be an OF girl, this is how you. would run it. And she it's a course like. like with any of these guys like Andrew. Elliot. Andrew Elliot. No, Andy Elliot. It's just a course that they're selling. for $6,000. And now other girls who do. that are like, "Hey, why don't you just. give this out for free? Like why don't. why you stop being a piece of [ __ ] Like. this course is not good." Like the. course is just getting the. >> I don't know. Um. >> I don't know. I mean it's girl it's up. to girls, right? It's their bodies. It's. their choices about it. Like, but I do. think 18 is kind of young.

>> It's very young. >> We had a lady on named Leila Mechawe and. she talked about a lot of pornography. that's online. It's not consensual. So, a lot there was like a lot of um. lawsuits that made uh that made like. Pornhub and some of these other sites. take down non-consensual sex. So, it was. sex that had been recorded, but nobody. had ever signed off and said, "Okay, yes, I'm okay with you putting that up.". Right. So, Only Fans Chameleia Arajoual um.

faces backlash for $5,000 course. People. saying it's a scam. >> I mean, people make courses for. everything. It's like if you go and buy. this, then that's your choice. Do I. think it's probably the best thing to be. kind of marketing? I don't know. I. >> I'm not a woman. I don't know if But I. think. >> I don't know. Would I want my daughter. probably doing that if she's like eight? I don't know. I I I'll tell you this. It'd be nicer if somebody's 25 and. they're able to make that choice. probably. >> Yeah. I think it's just anytime people.

spend money on something, there's a. sense of entitlement where it's like if. you pay a premium, you're expecting a. premium return and then if you log on to. it or you buy it and it's just a [ __ ]. course, then you're instantly mad. So, >> a lot of those courses are pretty mid, though. Remember all those ones during. co on Facebook? They were like it was. like the like everybody was putting a. course up. It felt like. >> Yeah. I mean, I did one at one point, too. I just you did what? Early early. early early on social media during the. pandemic. It was just like. >> you had to vape [clears throat] and. drive by somebody. >> Blow O's and blow loads. That's what it.

was called. Um O's and Loads. No, it was. just like during the pandemic and I was. literally like I'm just such a workhorse. and I like if I'm not doing anything I. like I just feel guilt. I feel like I. need to be doing something. And during. the pandemic I was like what if I did. like a just here's everything I do start. to finish video ideas when it comes to. creating ideas, editing it. And um. >> did you feel good about it? I felt like. I felt like it was true to me. I don't. know. I don't know. Uh which is cool. because now I have multiple friends who. I watch admire online and like years.

later we're like, "Yo, low key, we took. your class. Like, thank you for teaching. us the game." What the [ __ ]. >> dude? Actually, I took. >> Now I'm hanging out with students. >> I took a comedy class when I started. >> Yeah. >> So I Yeah, you're right. It's like. what's the real difference? It's it's. it's it's not up anymore or I don't. think you can buy it anymore, but like. it was just um at the time it was a. onetime purchase, $125, which. >> that's fair. >> Yeah. I mean, it's like. >> Well, you're a workhorse, though, dude. You love your work. You're locked in, you know. Um.

>> Yeah. I haven't done those in a while, but yeah. Well, it was it was it was. broken down into chapters. It was like 5. hours totals of stuff, and it was just. me saying I mean, I'm sure parts of it. were like maybe boring, but I think if. you watch the whole thing, I really. break it down. Like that's what's been. the hardest thing for me is like hiring. additional help is like I am so locked. in on like exactly what I want, what I'm. looking for and then I tell it to. somebody and then they don't do it. I'm. like no it was this like mock this. example here and it just. >> and then you have to do it yourself in. the end. >> and that takes a ton of time. That's the.

same way I'm with edits. It's like I got. to stay up and go watch through the. edits. It's like I just got to make sure. I'm very meticulous. It's hard for. somebody to get your like exact ways. down, you know? It's just tough. which. is hard because it's like if you do it. then they don't learn but sometimes just. whether it's a deadline or something. I'll be like here just let me over the. shoulder I'm like move this do this I'll. do it myself and be like you get it and. they're like yeah but but I'm not like. teaching them so I don't knowbody told. you that like getting into comedy now. you have to be like an employer like you. have to be like a boss. >> oh that's the worst. >> yeah you guys hear that back there it's. the [ __ ] worst make his life better.

>> no they do I I I'm the problem I feel. like usually it's like you know cuz. nobody knows what you want and you don't. even know like it's so hard to expl. explain yourself, [clears throat]. you know. H Yeah, but it is crazy from. going to somebody who just wanted to. kind of rest all day and like barely. made it to the show sometimes. Dude, I. remember one time I was drunk. I peed on. my phone or whatever and I couldn't even. [ __ ] get a hold of like the people to. come and get me for the show. Just like. >> nightmare [ __ ] And then to go from that. to being like, "Oh, dang. I'm in I like.

people are waiting to hear back from me. about stuff." It's like that kind of. stuff's a lot. I think evolving in a. place um especially if you find out that. you like to work a lot um and then. becoming a boss is super hard and and. learning to communicate like a like I'm. trying to learn to communicate better. It's been a slow climb man. >> The hardest part for me is like if I'm. not working then nobody's working it. feels like which isn't true but like it. feels like I need to be there to like. run ship but if I'm not then people are.

kind of like what do we who do I how do. I and that's why touring makes it hard. So, in a perfect world, I just want to. bring everybody. [ __ ] it. Bring your. Dell. Bring your PC. You're editing on. this flight and we can just all be. there, which is just not realistic. But. I feel like comedians now work harder. than they've ever worked. When you first. started, like I remember you were on. Last Comic Standing, right? >> Like in those days, what was kind of. like your dayto-day in comedy? Like was. is just you wake up and you just had. spots at night or were you doing other. [ __ ] or or. >> Yeah, you had spots at night. Go to the. gym. probably just try to take care of. yourself like you know stay like you.

know I liked going to the gym at the. time so do that. I mean I started doing. like this like crank texting thing and. some weird stuff like making some. websites. >> Oh oh oh yeah like trying to look for. some other. >> Yeah. Finding something on the internet. that could like be like another like. force for me or like another thing that. I could do. >> Um. >> who are like the big dogs in LA when. when you were uh. >> Oh Nick Thun Owen Benjamin. >> Yeah. Uh Dane Cook was like the biggest. guy right when I got there. >> Um I never saw him much, but sometimes.

he would come by some of the rooms. Um. who else? Um oh uh Steve Burn, Adam. Hunter. Those were like the guys that. were like um real popular at the rooms. that I went to. [clears throat] Um and. every now and then like a somebody. magical would come through, like a Jim. Norton would come through or like. Chelsea Handler I think came in one. time. >> But those weren't in the clubs. Those. were just like in the like tertiary. rooms, you know, some of those guys, I. guess, and girls that started getting. into clubs. >> So, what have you been up to in your. time off, your break? You you taking a.

couple months off now. >> Yeah. I mean, stand up. >> Yeah. Right. Right. >> We're still doing a ton of podcasting. >> In my head, I go like, "Oh, I have a. week off, but that just means from. touring." Right. The week off. Now, I'm. just doing the same [ __ ] at home. >> Yeah. Oh, it's nice having a break from. uh. >> travel. >> From travel. Yeah. From that kind of. thing. Um I mean, I got to go to a lot. of football games. That was fun. I. haven't been able to do that. Like I. mean I probably done 26 weeks a year for. probably 15 years. >> Yeah. >> So it's like. >> you know it's hard to kind of plan it. Well it's hard to go out of town. whenever you just went we're out of town.

even for work. >> Mhm. >> So that was fun getting to go to a lot. of uh SEC football games. That was. great. I got to redo my comedy special. So we're going to retape that at some. point. >> Oh nice. Have you announced that yet? >> Nope. >> Breaking news. >> I haven't heard it here live. So. >> uh do you know where you're shooting it. yet? >> I don't yet. We're going to start I got. to start figuring that out. just wanted. to wait till I felt like kind of excited. about uh. just kind of getting back on stage and I. just like I just wanted to have some. like space like just the tour. It was. just a last year was just a long year. totally. So.

>> totally. >> Um but it was great. I mean you know it. was good and it was just a lot. You're. just learning and life's changing and. you're like man this is like. >> you take a second to like pause like. what's the real priority here? >> Yeah. And you had to get security for. some stuff. You know you started. realizing you're kind of freaking out. when you're by yourself a little bit. like things like that. Um, >> I mean like. >> and that makes it kind of spooky, you. know. >> So I I think if you took a what a sample. size of like one in seven Americans, I. would say six of them know you. >> Oh no, I.

>> but but like seven people just any like. Santa Fe, New Mexico. Uh, you know, Dayton, Ohio. I mean those two defin but. like if you like. >> couple twinks maybe like you know. >> Yeah. But like I think you're just so. you're [clears throat] just so known. that there sometimes that you don't when. you just show you're just so you though. that it like I I don't know if you see. it. I mean obviously you see it but like. how the world sees you. That's something. that is always an interesting thing is. like you don't know how the world sees. you because you only see the world but.

like you're so well known. Yeah. >> That you just show up like solo. like. this [ __ ] just interviewed the. the Ukrainian missile crisis and. [laughter] now he's just at the comedy. store walking up by himself like. >> but you want to feel like just your own. space in the world you know and so I. think that was like kind of a conflict a. lot for me last year and like just. knowing that okay well sometimes you. just need to have somebody with you and. then I started really just feeling kind. of paranoid when I was by myself um but. some of it was just people filming you.

just people doing stuff that started to. make you kind of crazy like you'll just. go to eat or you'll go to do something. simple and it'll be like little things. and it's okay. I'm not complaining about. it. I'm just saying there's some. adjustment to it and there's some. psychological adjustment to it as well. And then I think like. >> yeah, things got scary last year when. they shot Charlie Kirk. That probably. scared everybody who even gets on a. stage, I think, was probably scared, you. know. >> Oh, dude. I was at the Comedy Store. I. have a clip of this. I might post it. I'll show it to you if it's good or not. But a balloon popped on New Year's. I. was at the store and my first words, I.

thought I just got kked. And uh it got a. it got a big pop, but it's one of those. things. It's like, do I post it? And. then the internet's like, "Oh, what? Well, now here we go with it, you now.". And I'm like, >> "No, I think it's fine, bro.". >> Oh, okay. Yeah. >> I think it's like I mean, >> but then I talk about Erica and her. eyesight and like that that's when it. goes like a little like. >> I think you have to joke about it. Like. I start thinking of things to talk about. about stuff like that. I mean, it's just. But yeah, I think all that made people. kind of spooked. It was like what's. going on? And then it doesn't seem like. the investigation like what's really.

happening here? And there's like they. show the kid at a Dairy Queen or. something and it's like he's wearing. different stuff. >> The biggest thing is like I think this. might have been put on by Dairy Queen. [laughter]. >> Like there there's no way that they. didn't put a bid in to some bigger. picture to be like listen Blizzards. aren't doing the numbers they used to. do. >> Like but but think about that. Any Okay, now I'm getting real conspiracy in here, but any fast food place he goes to their. sales are going to go up. People watch. this and are like, "Yo, I lowkey want a. Blizzard right now.". >> Yeah. Yeah, for sure. >> Bro, if [ __ ] Jack in the Box did this.

[ __ ] and he ate two tacos, >> bro. That's a Well, dude, I'm [ __ ]. sick of this planet. Get me off this. [ __ ] Dude, if BaskinRobins did this, they would have 32 flavors. >> Oh, they'd have Oh, I'd. >> bring the Choco Taco back to Taco Bell. >> I'd make a new flavor for him in the. back, homie. That's what [laughter] I. want, dude. That's what that twink. [ __ ]. >> Dude, if that would happen out of Ben. and Jerry's, they would have had it. They would have that flavor quick. >> Dude, how do they not have Twink. shooter? Twinkle, twinkle, little star. [laughter] How do they not have Twink.

shooter? Uh, Ben and Jerry's ice cream. flavor. Dude, that's the thing. Some of. these some of these food companies have. got to start to come out with foods that. people can relate to. It's like, how do. they not have that um the the rooftop. gunner McNugget or something, you know, like or like and it's like a little guy. >> Yeah. Maybe they serve them on a roof. Like you open up the thing and there's a. little roof in there and they're all. placed on there and one of them has a. little pistol or something. >> Dude, the Can we pull up a happy thing?

>> Oh, it's insane. But can we pull up a. McDonald's Happy Meal? It has a kind of. a roof in it. >> That's what I'm talking about. >> You know what I mean? And they put a. toy. But the [ __ ]. >> bro. In Pizza Hut, you don't even want. to see a Pizza Hut with the old with the. old [ __ ] sombrero on it. >> Yes, bro. Put a sniper on there. >> And when Papa John said that word, they. should have done a different specialty. Ah, and Papa John's. You should when you. open one of the boxes every day, this is. how they do it. One magical box. It has. one of those voice things in it that.

when you open Yes. [laughter] It says. the N word. And if you get that pizza, you get it free. >> Isn't that interesting? With no reward, it's so [ __ ] up. It's so bad. But then. you get a reward. You're like, "This is. Loki Willy Wonka.". >> Yeah. All people want is a little bit of. something extra. They want a little bit. of prize, you know. Um, >> I I I'm, you know, the Epstein files are. out, but I'm excited for the Wonka. files. >> Oh, >> I think some weird [ __ ] was going down. at Willy Wonka. >> with Goloris Glunt or whatever that kids. >> turning [ __ ] into blueberries. It's. literally all children and little people.

running around. Like, I feel like we're. getting into some weird files that are. going to drop soon. The Wonka The Wonka. tapes. >> What? >> The Wonka tapes. >> Trevor Wonka. It's full knowledge now. that Prize Picks is America's number one. sports pick app. It's undeniable. The. app is really easy to use. And it's got. everything. Player picks, team picks, and culture picks. That's right. On top. of picking player lineups, you can now. pick teams on prize picks. Pick the.

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look that up? Was there any sexual. accusations or allegations during Willy. Wonka? Let's look that up. >> You but do the OG one, not the Shadow. one. >> I'm just wondering uh investigating. sexual accusations during the taping of. any Willy Wonka film. Um. >> child labor laws. Yeah, for sure. They're throwing [ __ ] in a in a. fondue pot. >> Mentioned rejecting Michael Jackson for. Wonka due to power. Oh, will Michael. Jackson was going to be in Wonka.

>> Charlie and Chocolate Factory. >> All right, that was the worst joke I've. ever said. >> We'll take it out. [laughter]. Um, but dude, I I guess like Yeah. Going. back to what do you think? Do you think. there should be a age law for sex work? >> Yeah. Um, I I do think 25 kind of makes. sense. You like. I think about what I was doing from 18. to 22. I mean, I was just in college and. I was making the worst decisions of my. entire life. Like, at one point, I.

smoked weed out of a light bulb. Like, literally the base of a light bulb and. like that same guy could have been like, "Fuck it. Here's my dick, >> right?" Cuz that has tungsten in it, too. It could be real dangerous probably. inhaling tungsten. >> Yeah. I mean, you might as well just. smoke meth at that point, but I broke a. light bulb and use the bottom of it to. as a bowl for weed. So, um. >> That's I didn't even use the glass. Like, that's crack neighbor behavior, dude. Yeah, it is. >> That's crack neighbor behavior. Yeah, that's parallel of of crack right there. >> That's meth adjacent, bro. >> Methad Jason sounds like a great podcast.

that could come out. Methad Jason. Holy. [ __ ]. >> Oh, what about Freddy verse meth. adjacent, dude? >> Oo, I like that. Um, >> but um or what if the I'm trying to. think if like cuz yeah, if you had to be. 25 to do that and you had to be 18 to be. in the army, but what if they came out. with like an Army fans, dude? That's the. thing. Like I start to see like weird. business mergers happening. Like we've. had like Long John Silvers and Baskin. Robbins, didn't they merger? >> No. >> Who merged? [laughter].

>> Pizza Hut and um. >> and Long John Silvers. >> I thought it was the the [ __ ] that. can't pull their own on their own. You. know what I mean? >> But first of all, Long John Silvers, shut it down. >> Yeah. I mean that I mean investigate. their taxes. That's a drug fraud. >> You thought [ __ ] was going on weird in. Minnesota with the Somali. Let's. investigate Long John Silvers. Bro, there's no catch of the day out in. [ __ ] Midland, Texas. >> The catch of the day is the felon that. was working behind the fry the fry. counter. That's the catch is when he. leaves and the ankle monitor goes off.

Type in Long John Silver CEO if you. don't mind. >> Oh, Long John Silver is right here. Um, under companies like Yum Brands, that's. what they're called now. Creating. combined locations with KFC, Pizza, or. Taco Bell. >> Yeah, that's a cra I just don't like. that, dude. Cuz I don't like somebody, you know, they're cooking fish on one on. the grill and they're also cooking a. burger. Taco Bell does it with a bunch. It might be Taco Bell and Pizza Hut. You'll see those like randomly like at. like a. >> and then they stuff them in a gas. station and it's [ __ ]. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> It's not the same. >> None of that shit's the same. But dude, I could see an army fans, dude.

>> Can you see the Army fans? >> I could definitely see it. But who are. they like taking down? Like. >> they're not fighting. It's just military. people to showing their junk. >> Oh. Oh. >> To make an extra buck, I feel like. Or. probably to fund our military. I feel. like. I could just see that, you know? >> I think it's a good idea to fund the. military. Yeah, hold on. Why don't we do All these guys are. jacked. They work out 24/7. They might. have like a little bit of like dirt or. dust on their face from being at combat. There's so many like lonely women in in. the Midwest. Well, globally, who are.

like that's hot. >> Yeah. And the chance they could do like. uh I don't know what uh I'm trying to. think what their. >> but this for$6 more dollars you can see. this whole Yeah, something like that. This busy's getting sold. >> Yeah, >> that's what we need, dude. It's like. left, right, left, right. But it's just. somebody showing their different tits. Yes, >> it's somebody's a great way to fund the. military. I I I think. >> because everything's going bankrupt. So,

you're going to have to find ways to. fund things. >> This is what I've been hearing is like, yeah, everywhere is bankrupt, which. blows my mind because it's like, so what. what's h like what? We're not getting. enough money and and neither the. businesses. So, who. >> I know. >> I can't even think about it. It hurts my. head. >> It's getting weird, dude. >> I Yeah, I mean, >> everything's getting weird, bro. The. current CEO of Long John Silvers is Nate. Fowler, who took over in February 2025, succeeding Blaine Short Reed, who had. served as CEO since early 2021. >> Can I see a photo of this guy? >> Yeah, that's Nate Fowler. He's a baller.

Oh, he hoops. Oh, he looks like a nice guy. He He looks like a nice guy. He also. looks like he's never had long John. Silvers in his entire life. Yeah. [laughter]. >> He's like, "What are we serving here?". Oh, hell no. Hell no. >> Well, dude, they have that carp or. whatever. I'm like, I'm not [ __ ]. parking and getting out of my car. >> Park to carp. >> Yeah. I I don't know. There's something. about I'm not getting carp through a. drive-thru. I'm just not I'm not going.

in there to get any carp. >> Drive-thru is the I think the downfall. of America. I I saw a Skyline Chile in. Ohio with a drive-thru. I said, "If. you're getting chili on the road, you. might as well start drinking. you you. you have a better chance to survive. getting a DUI than eating hot. spaghettiios [laughter] in the back of a. tundra. And we start to we sometimes we. think like, oh, we're Americans. We. deserve so much. But then when you look. at what we what we are willing to accept. just on a daily level for ourselves and. I know some people they can't afford. certain things and I get that. But when.

you're willing to just pull up with your. kids and just sit there and eat chili in. the car and just just do gas on each. other and do body gas on each other, it's. >> what are you doing? >> It's just come to a place. >> just cuz you're a Bengals fan or. whatever. You know what [laughter] I'm. saying? What are we doing? [ __ ] Joe. Burrow playing like [ __ ] his ear. >> Hey, sack this. >> [ __ ]. >> Yeah. It's so funny how Americanized my. brain. Obviously T. Higgins and your dad. just farts again. You're like, come on, dad. probably how it all starts. That's.

the warm up in the locker room. But it's. so like this format is so normal to me. that if I see a place that doesn't have. a drive-thru, I'll be like, "Ah, let me. look." Like if I'm going to Starbucks, I'm like, "Oh, this Starbucks doesn't. have a drive-thru. Let me find a. drive-through Starbucks.". >> Yeah, that's a good point. All you got. to do is add a road and you up your. sales. >> Oh, dude. A Starbucks on some places. would be so good on a nice steakhouse, but you could wait like 40 minutes in. line once you put your order at the sign. if it's like a busy place. >> Oh, yeah. >> Um, yeah. Yeah, the McRib. They just.

said this. Black folks are going to be. pissed. What's inside a McRib? McDonald's hit with class action lawsuit. claiming the sandwich doesn't contain. rib meat. Well, TBD on that, brother. I'm going to leave. that up. >> to my more chocolatey associates in the. world because that's out of my. jurisdiction, brother. According to the. complaint, the McRib is actually made. from restructured pork, which combines. cuts as such as shoulder heart, tripe, and scalded stomach. None of which.

qualify as ri meat. That's fair. >> At least it's from a pig. I thought for. sure that they were just like painting. some some cow different color. >> But to just do that, to lie to a culture. for so long saying it's ri. I knew it. wasn't ri. One of my friends lives and. dies by this thing. My buddy Scotty, I'm. like, he's always sending me pictures of. him getting the McRib whenever it's back. or whatever. I'm like, where did it go? It didn't [ __ ]. >> Yeah. What did they do? And they used to. like I mean Bird always used to talk. about that. Bert Chrysler would always. talk about uh how like crime would go up.

when the McRib was gone or whatever. >> I think it did. Yeah. I think this is. like a real Americans like uh Groundhog. Day. >> Yeah. >> Like the McRib is back. Fine, honey. You're getting a ring this year. >> Why don't more people bet on prize picks. with [ __ ] the Mc Rib? IS IT COMING. BACK IN JANUARY? >> YEAH. I don't know. I mean, um, what. blows my mind about fast food, I feel. like I've talked about it on this. podcast before. I don't know why, but, um, what [ __ ] me up is, you know, the. grill marks on chicken, >> not real grill. It's just little, it's.

tattooed on. >> What do you mean on chicken? You mean on. just regular chicken you buy? >> Yeah. Not Not at like at a If you get a. grilled chicken from McDonald's, not. breaded, but grilled. They have like. grill marks on it. That's fake. That's. It's like literally It's like a henna. tattoo. >> Grill marks on It's like a Hannah. [laughter] tattoo. Grill marks on fast. food chicken are often fake. created by. industrial branding machines. Yeah. Oh. god. So they do that for the illusion. that you're like this was on a grill. >> Oh yeah. >> But I'm a suck. I mean like if I see I'm. not questioning it. >> Well this scene they but I don't think.

it's that. >> they're not doing that. That's some guy. >> that's more work. >> That's Nicholas Tesla making a chicken. [laughter]. >> But if you if type in like a McDonald's. >> No, I think it says it right there. It's. obvious, man. >> But I'm sure there's a video where you. like erase it. Like I'm pretty sure. >> Have you ever wondered how frozen food. companies No get grill marks on chicken. that clearly wasn't cooked on a grill. because it came out of a factory? Well, this is how they do it. There are wheels.

that are very hot. >> that roll directly over the chicken and. leave them. continuously branded with grill marks. >> Now, for $6 more dollars, she would show. you a breast or something at the end of. that. >> Go to the military. >> Welcome to the military. Welcome to the. Air Force, dude. >> I mean, that's where the hotties are, too. In the military, is in the Air. Force, bro. >> What? The hotties are in there? >> Yeah. >> Really? >> Are are people in the military allowed. to have an Only Fans? >> Cuz I could see a merger there. I could. just see like everything's so weird now.

I could easily see a merger there. >> Well, everybody's doing collabs. Like, if Long John Silvers and Dairy Queen are. going to do something, you think the. military would at least take on one of. these websites. >> And this is a perplexity. Thank you. No. members of the US military are not. allowed to operate Only Fans accounts, particularly those involving adult. content due to strict regulations on. outside employment and conduct. These. activities often violate ethics rules. requiring prior approval. Now, I if you. are losing your life or risking your. life for our country, I don't know if I.

believe that that's fair. >> Yeah, get the pop a little pee or. something. I'll tell you what, if I was. in jail, the first thing I'm doing is. buying one of those phones out of. another dude's ass, which might be the. worst convenience store ever. I'm buying. a phone out of. >> Well, here the thing. You put your money. in his hand and whatever comes out of. his ass is yours. I think that's usually. how those kind of like. >> That is very true. >> Oh, dude. >> Isn't that funny? >> And it's usually the first thing out. because you kind of have to give a like. you don't usually have a ton of money. like he's got one item in there. If he's. got two, then that boy is into a.

different place. >> No, I think you can tickle each guy to. kind of see if you can guess. >> Holy [ __ ] That's how you rob a human. vending machine. >> Yeah, >> they got androids. But I think the first. thing I would do if I was in jail. because some I don't know how they get. internet or Wi-Fi but like I'll see like. live Tik Toks in jail somehow sometimes. >> Yeah, Drewus has all those guys doing. that always looped in with like a lot of. like um it looks kind of like boys to. men sort of like it looks like a ac. capella group that went to jail, right? >> You know, and they're all wearing shyies. and [ __ ] and they're all in there. >> Yeah, you don't need the shy. You're. already in jail. [laughter].

>> Um but I think I would immediately try. to start an OAF account. I would be like. I'm already in jail. Like like I would. just J I would just beat my [ __ ] every. night in my cell. >> Oh, I don't know. I think you get tired. of that. You want to start reading, dude. Trust me. Let me just tell you. after a couple nights, you're going to. want to. >> if I was in jail, >> you're going to want to tap into a good. book. >> But ju just if I wanted to raise enough. money to pay for my bail. >> Oh, for sure. >> If I'm in jail and I want to get out. Yeah. No, no, no. I hear you. I I I. think that's always the answer. But if. I'm in jail and I'm trying to meet my.

bail, uh, and I need like 50k, I don't. know what the crime would be. uh. >> type [ __ ]. >> Yeah, I'm showing meat to get some. bread. >> And are you jerking off uh semi-regular. or what? >> Not really. >> Wow. >> I. >> Have you jerked off this year? And. >> uh [laughter] I thought you were going. to say it today. >> Wait, dude. I'm not gay, dude. Have you. jerked off this year? >> Uh yeah, but it's only when I'm like uh. in hotels. This is the first time I've. been in hotels. Yeah. >> Well, there hasn't been that much of.

this year. I'm just saying. >> So you're still days in are we? >> Huh? Not enough for you to win this argument. >> If I'm I'm like a one a week guy, you. know, like I'm I'm. >> I want to be. >> I'm like a trash can. I got to take the. load out to the front yard every once in. a while. >> Well, here's the thing, dude. I'll. sometimes jerk off so I don't go do. something else that's going to get me in. trouble. >> Yeah, that's what I'll do. It's like if. I'm feeling like, man, I want to go out. and meet up like some go to a bar, meet. up with some people, or do something. that, you know, could be more risky for. me. Sometimes I'll jerk off so I don't. go do that.

>> because it'll be like, oh, you ain't. doing [ __ ] Whitey. after I jerk off. That's kind of the voice that's in my. head. You ain't doing [ __ ] you little. wigger. >> What's funny? I had the same thought one. time on tour. I was single, but I've. never been a guy who's wanted to be like. if somebody DMs me after a show, I'm. like, "What's up?" You know, like, >> yeah. >> Yeah. I stay away from. >> You don't want some of that. I mean, I'll engage sometimes, but I'm not I'm. never like, "Hey, send me that uh crazy. >> Send me a drawing of that cooter or. whatever, you know?". >> Yeah. Draw it on an IG story. Make it a. boomerang. Make that [ __ ] breathe for.

me. But. >> oh my god, [laughter] you're out there, bro. >> I'm never that guy. I don't even say. that in real life. Like, >> but you know the lingo, dog. You're in. there. >> Let it breathe. Yeah, I've been I've. been watching I've been watching Drewki. videos. But I remember this exact. moment. It was in like I want to say. Atlanta. This was like a a year or two. ago, but this this girl DM was like. trying to meet up and I'm like, I don't. really [clears throat] do this. But she. was really attractive. And. >> she had them bangers and front acorns on. her. >> I don't know. She's pride on. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. She could have been a. dude for all I know. But. >> shorty had that yard work on her. Huh? >> Front. Yeah. She had that reverse mullet. all topheavy. Nothing in the back. >> But I remember I was like, "No, Trevor, don't do that." But cuz there was a few. messages back and forth. And then I went. to the bathroom, beat my [ __ ] and then. I was like, "All right, we're good.". >> Yeah. >> About an hour goes by and I fill back up. testosterone. I go, "Fuck it. What are. you doing?". >> Uh-uh. [clears throat]. >> And Yeah. Then she come over. >> No, she's too late. >> Yeah. But like you getting the seat out.

only buys you about an hour of time. >> So So I was like, "You know what? You. don't need this. Go jerk your [ __ ] and. you're have the rest of your night and. go to sleep.". >> Oh, for sure. >> But then I was up for another hour. All. of a sudden, back to the brim. >> Well, I would You got to You got to. employ other forces, bro. A lot of times. I would jerk off and then if I had to I. would go eat like um I would go eat like. a bag of bread or something or like half. a bag of bread just because I'm not. gonna go. >> I feel like it's better to [laughter]. have sex than eat a bag of bread. >> Well, for sure. But I mean also you're.

creating just like somebody's coming. over. You don't know what's going to go. on, how late you got to be up. But I. would eat a bunch of bread or order a. bunch of rolls up to my room and eat. like six or seven rolls or some toasted. or some toasted bread. >> It's almost like you'd give yourself. >> just to be like I'm not going to eat a. ton of bread and then go have sex like. >> Oh, interesting. It's almost like you. give yourself postnet regret without. doing it. >> Oh, why do you like two or three burger. patties? Just something that would like. be like, oh, I'm so glutton like I'm not. going to be all fat trying to have sex. >> Chicken wings are a big one. >> Or I'm I'm just not going to be all like. I don't want to be having sex and. hearing the food like bang around as my.

>> What's the funniest thing you've ever. eaten before uh having a night with uh. somebody you've dated or a lady? >> Do you ever you ever have like a meal. that comes your mind? >> No. >> Really? Dude, >> like I remember one time I went to a. >> I had some probably good like maybe. small like like unique little cookies or. something. Maybe something nice. But you. never had one of those like like I have. a very specific memory. I went to a um. God there's like [clears throat] three. really good guitarist right now. What is. his name? He He's like the big He's.

probably been on the show. Strings. Billy Strings. >> Billy Strings. >> I was I was out day drinking all day and. I was eating hot dogs day drinking with. my friends which is uh the straightest. thing you can do. Then I went to a bill. met up with my dad. I went to a Billy. Strings concert. >> Oh, he's playing next month at. Bridgestone. Wow, >> dude. He's iconic. He was great. He's so. good live. But I remember eating a bunch. of hot dogs and chicken wings. And then. I went to Billy Strings with with my. dad. I had an edible and I went back to. my place before his girl came over and I. [ __ ]. so hard like liquid and and and I was.

like, "All right, I'm about to shower.". And then I get a text, "Hey, I'm here.". >> Not good. I I really had to wipe down. I. I had to uh you know. >> the craziest. >> I should take my ass to a car wash or. something. >> Yeah. The craziest sometimes you're. almost amazed your ass can do all of. that. >> Yeah. >> You're like, "Wow." All right. >> But that's growing up, man. That really. is. Yeah. I was just trying to think. like I feel like uh. >> But no, I've never had a crazy meal. >> But you never like had like chicken. wings and then like indulged in some. some love making.

>> Oh, for sure. >> Yeah. But even that's a little. >> But nothing that stood out crazy. I've. never had like any like, you know, like. a something from India or something that. came [laughter] through the through the. mail and then I just like, oh, let me. finish off a quart and a half of this. before I try and make love. >> Never had like clam chowder then been in. someone else's clam with some chatter. Come on, Theo. You know, had like a. crazy, >> bro. I have a funny ass story about you. Um, we did a a festival together and. >> Oh, yeah. Where were we? >> Somewhere in Canada and you you were in.

your trailer. were hanging out and uh it. was me, you, and a couple people and. we're all in conversation. In the middle. of the conversation, we're in your. trailer. You walk to the bathroom. Blow. it up. Did I. >> blow it up? You sure, >> buddy? You can cut this if you want, but. the It was like in a It was like in a. The green room was a motor home trailer. and the doors were thin and we heard we. I mean, it sounded like you were. kickstarting an F350. I mean, it was. loud and then you walk right back out.

and you're like, "All right, so what are. we doing tonight? Uh-huh. >> Wow. >> And I don't know, you can cut that if. you want, but. >> No, I might had a long flight or. something or who knows. Sometimes the. exchange rate on your. >> Oh, yeah. I mean, all the travel all the. travel is. >> the travel is just like your It's like. your things are small and big and you. don't even know. You eat two like small. things on a plane and when you land they. weigh more because of gravity. >> It was that one. It was Vancouver, which. Vancouver does have a lot of Indian. food. So maybe you got spiked with a. little bit of Indies. >> I don't even know what happened, dude. >> It was just It was just funny moment.

That's That's life. That's That's all of. us. What are we all going to pretend? Like, dude, the [ __ ] three of those. people back there, guarantee one person. back there blew a bathroom up this. morning. >> Yeah. Well, people get some. confirmation. >> Guilty. >> That's what the [ __ ] I'm talking about. >> People are [ __ ] all the time. That's. the craziest thing. I can't believe that. there's not a report each day [snorts]. that tells you about it more. Well, there's toilets now that can remember. when you've gone to the bathroom and. everything like that. There's a there's. that new cat thing that if your cat when. your cat goes to the bathroom, it'll let. you know. They'll send you a thing at.

work. Are your cat [ __ ]. >> I This is stupid. I hate it. It's called. Litter Little Robot. It's probably the. worst app I've ever had. My problem is. these everything. >> Do you have cats? >> I've won. But he'd be [ __ ] But the. my the thing with. >> Are you getting updates about it? >> Oh, dude. I get his his his bowel. movements every day. It's like when. Spotify rap dropped, I'm like, I don't. care who Drake is. Like, I don't care. who your top artist is. It's like, you. want to know what week day of the week. my cat shit's the hardest? It's. Wednesdays, brother. >> It's it's it's Wow. But the problem is. every. >> they catch [ __ ] every day.

>> Uh I I want to say so. I think they're. like uh I don't know when they do. [snorts] Maybe like night time or. something. >> But my problem with all these apps is. like they uh they everything has an app. now, but but they're not being made by. good like web developers. Yeah. >> He's like why why do I got to have a why. do I have an undercase uppercase. lowerase password for my cat to [ __ ]. >> I know. >> [ __ ] fires me up. Well, I think it's. hard because now with AI, like you could. just set an AI thing to just try and.

scramble to figure out somebody's. password and it could just do it. infinitely, you know? That's why that's. why there's a lot of fear these days. Um, >> but yeah, dude, some of that stuff. What. was that thing you was just showing with. that cat? >> The litter robot. Yeah, it shows. I can. pull it up right now. >> Oh, I believe you, dude. I'm sorry. you're having to go through all that. It's just crazy that that's kind of. where we are. >> What's the newest thing you bought. recently that that fired you up? Not much. I haven't really bought. anything. I've been kind of looking for. a house, but it's been like a slow look.

>> Same area or like same like city. >> Yeah, I want to live in the same area, same city, but it's just been kind of. tough. There's been some that have come. by, but it's just like And then it's. hard to go look. Sometimes you get. caught up with work and stuff like that, but it's been good. >> What uh. >> what do you what what what kind of space. you want like a new house? >> I just want a little more space, a. little bit more like property. Kind of a. little bit just a little bit more land. Not even a ton, but just a little bit. more. >> Would you have a farm? >> I wouldn't mind maybe getting a couple. animals or something. Like if my I know. my mom would like to have some animals, so maybe I could keep some if she wanted.

to come out and see them sometimes. That's cool. >> I wouldn't I mean it would be nice to. have some a couple horses and a dog. >> Couple editors out there. >> Yeah, [laughter] a couple editors in the. barn. >> Roosters, donkeys, some guys cutting. clips in the back. >> Feeding them hay. >> Um. >> feeding them prime the animals, dude. Dude, what did I just see of uh what was. that thing at Rogan's? I saw this thing. Do you see this thing at Rogan's Club. where the furries showed up and were. protesting him? >> Really? No. Furries? >> Yeah. See if you can find that. >> Is this real? >> Protesters gather outside Joe Rogan's.

comedy mothership in Austin. [music]. >> Rogan is diet. Alec Jones. Never again. is now. What does that even mean? Does. it. >> That was Trisha Pa's backup slogan. [laughter]. Never again. >> What were they there for? Does it say if. you look in the comments or anything? >> This looks like a silent disco. This is. the worst protest I've ever seen. [laughter] Also looks fun.

>> It does look fun. I mean, they have a. cartman out there. >> Yeah. What was that? Uh discover the. protest at Joe Rogan's County Motion in. Austin where critics gathered to voice. their opinions on the podcaster. Um. >> Well, first of all, this was on New. Year's Eve, so these [ __ ] are. lonely. [laughter]. >> Yeah, that is so. >> Hey, what are you guys doing? when the. ball drops, we're going to go protest. the mothership. >> Is that even real? I wonder then. >> I don't know. >> It looks like it could have just been a. party outside of there. >> Yeah. I don't There's two people with a. How many people do you need for it to be. a protest? You know, cuz at one point is.

like I I'm curious about the guys who. preach the gospel out front of like, you. know, you go down a PPG arena and and. they're preaching the gospel with a. sign, but it's one guy. Like, is that a. protest or is he just schizophrenic? >> That's a good point. Sometimes that's a. guy just pre just like soapbox kind of. >> Yeah. >> This says here, let me see. It says, "Protesters gathered outside comedy. mothership in Austin on New Year's Eve. 2025 to criticize Joe Rogan, the club's. owner and podcaster. They labeled him as. a diet Alex Jones, comparing his views. to one of the far-right figure, Alex. Jones, also based in Austin. Critics.

blame Rogan for dominating Austin's. comedy scene since opening the club in. 2023, sidelining local video venues like. Coldtown Theater and Capitol City Comedy. Club.". Um, yeah. I don't know. Oh, some of the. demonstrators wore inflatable costumes. like unicorns, dinosaurs, and cows, >> which is also Rogan's diet. [laughter]. >> Plus, an Eric Kartman impersonator from. South Park. Why holding up signs such as. never again is now.

>> Why is he talking about Yoda? I don't. get the never again is now thing. >> I don't know. But I think you're right. when you said that it's Trisha Bis'. second slogan. It's a great idea. Um, >> I know, man. That's bizarre. >> Fellas, you already know what time it. is. Look at your watch. Time to knock on. wood. Blue Chew. Blue Chew just dropped something crazy. I'm talking next level championship. belt. Goldplated energy. Blue Chew. Gold.

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hard. What uh what Oh, I saw your you went to. the Rams game. You did you get. >> Dude, I I I got big in football. I I'm. I'm I'm locked in. I used to be a guy. like three years ago that was like, "Oh, you like sports? Get a real personality, bud. Get a hobby. Do do open nights. Do. But like I got invited to a Rams game a. couple years ago, maybe like two years. ago. And I just it clicked and I just. started, you know, it started by me just. going to games. >> and then it started by me like, you. know, like watching the game on your.

phone. Oh yeah. >> And you're like at D'Vor and you're like. just kind of watching it. But um over. time you just kind of get locked in and. it's just like now I'm all about it. Like I I don't I don't miss a game. I. was just at the Rams game on uh Sunday. against the Cardinals and like like now. it's to the point where it affects my. day. I'm fully in. I was I was like in. denial, but like it's kind of like with. like nicotine or something where you're. like I'm not gonna get addicted to not. me. Not me. I'm built different and then. it's you know [ __ ] you have one. [clears throat] before breakfast but. yeah I did the chant at the Rams game. like the who's house chant they. >> Was that scary? What was that vibes.

like? >> You know it was a lot of fun. I think um. I was definitely more amped up. Uh. >> let's see it. Pull it up. >> But I think just performance and. standing is just this is just another. gig, >> right? You're kind of used to that part. So the nerves aren't there but I guess. off the the acoustics all that would be. kind of scary to me. I I will say it's. like EDM and sports like they they just. cheered anything like I did a gig. opening opening lightly I say for Dylan. Francis you know Dylan. >> years ago at hard summer I went up as.

like a fake DJ before he his set the. headlining set so when I went up there. was like a character and was like what. the [ __ ] is up Coachella and it was at a. different music venue and like they just. cheered like they were just happy like. they they don't even care they hear. somebody making noise in a micro I could. have went up and went apa and they're. like yeah. >> So like that same kind of energy that I. got from that crowd was the the same I. got at the Rams when I'm just like you. yell who's house Rams like you're just. going to get good feedback. So. >> um.

>> dude and it's nice to it is nice to be a. fan of something like I became a fan of. Vanderbilt. I've been a fan of LSU and. um and I cheer for the Valls but it's. like it's just nice to be a fan of. something. It makes you gives you. something to be kind of invested in. Let's see this. Let's see this house. part. Is it in here? >> I can throw 40 yards. >> Who's house? [screaming]. It's. >> so awkward just seeing it. They got to. cut to. >> I look like the Seahawks logo. >> Yeah. Try to sneak a quick joke in. there.

>> Of respect. Oh, you do look like. Seahawks logo from the side right there. >> Um uh. >> and you had your own celebration, too. I. saw the uh what was the. >> Did I. >> What was that S that he had? >> Oh, this is this is dumb. This is. insane, [laughter]. dude. >> Sometimes I just pose something and I'm. like, man, [ __ ] it. Cuz those are the. ones that like that'll either hilarious. >> That'll either flop or do like whatever. But. >> I saw this as an insane touchdown. celebration. >> Yeah, it's crazy. Dude, John Morant, can. we pull up his his buckets? You know. John Mar? >> Yeah. >> For the Grizzlies. Oh yeah, we're in uh.

Tennessee. His celebrations. I can't. stop talking about how, Dude, they're. the funniest things in the world. >> The grenade. >> I haven't even noticed a lot of them. >> Have you seen them, dude? When he makes. like a three, he does the grenade, throws it, and then covers his ears. I. mean, you have to get him on the pod. The grenade covers the ears. >> That is pretty clutch, bro. >> And then he started doing one that's. like a rocket launcher, but then he got. He gets fined for every single one of. these. He did a rocket launcher. So now.

his new one is he'll pull out a gun and. then put it down like this. He holsters. it and goes like, "No fines here, >> dude." It's I like it's so funny to me. >> He doesn't give a [ __ ] huh? >> No. And he's going to find like probably. like 10 or 30k like for this, but when. you're making that much, I just don't. know. He puts a gun away, holsters it, puts [laughter] it down. >> There we go. And and that's and that's. protecting gun. >> legendary dude. >> It's funny, man. I think that even the. players are getting scared of being over.

there. So, he may need that weapon when. he when he leaves the facility. It's. kind of crazy. The one place they should. be allowed to actually have weapons in. the sies is there, I think. >> Right. Right. Right. Yeah. It depends on. the team. If if you're on the Warriors, okay, that's enough. >> Yeah. >> What you just tweet about it, you know, just hit up Zuck and be like, "This gu. bullying me online." But if you're in. Memphis, yeah, you need at least like a. bow and arrow or the RPG. I've never. been What is Memphis like? I'm going. there my tour. >> Memphis is awesome, dude. It has so much. history. It's just gotten this kind of. [clears throat] it's gotten like a lot. of it's got a lot of danger downtown at.

night and in just different areas and it. makes it kind of a bummer because you. can't go enjoy. >> like the vibes that are there. Graceand. is really great if you get to go see. Elvis's house. >> Okay. >> It's great. >> I've heard about that. >> It's great. It's worth going to see. >> and that's where Wait, hold on. I'm. really dumb. Elvis lived in Memphis or. Graceand is on the outskirts of Memphis. >> Elvis is it's in Memphis and Elvis lived. there. >> Elvis in Memphis. >> Oh, he was probably clapping BBWs. >> I mean, I don't know what it was like. back then, man. But I bet it was a great. mix of music and sound and culture and. everything. I mean, Memphis used to be.

so great, dude. If you get to stay at. the a hotel downtown where they have the. ducks and the ducks come in like every. day at like I think 400 p.m. the duck. master brings in the ducks and uh. >> a military thing. >> No, it's like these ducks that come in. and they swim in the uh pond up there. The famous Peabody ducks at the Peabody. >> Yeah. >> The Peabody ducks are the resident. malards at the Peabody Memphis Hotel. known for their daily march down a red. carpet into the lobby fountain at 11:00. a.m. and back to their rooftop duck.

palace at 5:00 pm. The tradition began. in 1933 when the hotel's general manager. and a friend after some whiskey put. their live duck decoys in the lobby. fountain, delighting guests. H Okay. What's crazy is ducks are called ducks. cuz they literally duck. >> Yeah. Oh, [laughter] it could be just a. couple. It could be a couple brothers. named Duck. But these are the actual. ducks. Yeah. People come in and the Duck. Master walks them in. And the Duck. Master live in the hotel up top.

>> Is he really? >> Yeah. It's a beautiful place. And they. got a great place there where they sell. like uh replica suits that Elvis used to. wear. I got one last time that I was. over last time I was over there. >> Oh, wow. >> It's pretty cool. >> Yeah, I'm excited, man. I'm going to do. a lot of places I've never been on my. tour. Um and and Memphis is definitely. one of them. >> Oh, it's going to be good. Yeah, there's. great people there. It's great shows. It's just they got this they got like I. don't know. It just gets a little bit. tragic over there and kind of shooty. That's the thing. >> It gets shooty at night. But there's a. >> chance of precipitation. >> Yeah. >> From a Luger. >> People popping off anymore. Yeah. That's.

>> um. >> Well, that's that's. >> But yeah, that bus nut Sy, dude. That. shit's nice, man. >> Yeah, that's crazy. >> When do you think the first person that. ever busted a nut actually was, do you. think? Can you pull that up? >> Wasn't it Adam? >> Huh? >> Was it Adam? >> No. Adam Lambert? No. >> Like an Eve? Or were they even real? >> Yeah. >> Adam and Eve. >> They had to have been. somebody at this. time. >> I mean, I don't think we should go down. that road right now, but we can, but it. just might take a long time. The. earliest recorded references to. ejaculation in human history appear in.

ancient Sumerian and Egyptian myths from. around 2500 to 24,400. >> The Somali, >> these texts describe. these texts describe God creating. rivers, deities, and the world through. acts of masturbation and seinal. emission. I wonder how many people called out of. work the next day once they found out. about masturbation. >> Oh, the this. >> It's like in middle school when like a. new video game would drop and you'd be. like be home sick the next day and like. COD dropped. >> Oh, if a good game drop,

>> man. I miss it, >> dude. That [ __ ] was so nice. >> You play any video games? >> Not right now. I haven't been playing. them, man. I wouldn't mind. Oh, I do. play uh I played Breath of the Wild and. I played whatever the the second one. was. >> I'm not sure I know that. >> What was the second one? It was on. Switch. Oh yeah. You a Switch guy? >> Yeah, I like Switch just because I can. kind of keep with me on the go. Oh, uh, Tears of the Kingdom. >> The second one was not good. It was just too invol. It was like, bro, I don't have time for all. You had to.

like heat everything. It was like too. many things. Like the first one you have. to warm up your food. It's like, okay, I'll spend a little bit of time doing. that. >> But this one you had to like heat up. your um. >> like if you wanted your thing to fly, you warm up these. It just was way too. like, dude, what the [ __ ] I have a job, you know. >> Yeah. >> And shouldn't you want me to have a job? Like, how much time would should you. want me to spend here? It felt like they. wanted you to spend so much time there. It felt kind of unfair. >> Okay. I I'll I'll avoid it. >> So, that's what I kind of felt like. >> Does look kind of chill though, the.

flying. >> When does it When does someone's nut. actually bust? What is that about? [laughter]. >> You know what I'm saying? You hear about. it, but what's like the exact like what. is the actual like what's like the. NASCAR? They wave the flag to go. >> Yeah. When is that? When is that when is. the nut when is the nut actually bust? If you can look that up. >> Is it fast? >> Without us being on a list also. >> Oh yeah. But is it like you know like. the speed of light? Like do you think. there's something called like the speed. of nut? >> I mean it's right there. It has to be.

something because it's really how. creation started. I mean they're saying. right there that it's like in ancient. texts that that's how like the creation. of rivers and lands and. >> and even people started. >> What how how many miles per hour is it? I think that'd be something. >> Let's learn. A nut bust is slang for. ejaculation during masturbation or sex. It refers to the moment of orgasm when. semen is released. The phrase emerged in. the 1930s with nuts meaning testicles. since the 1800s. It evolved to.

describing climaxing explosively. People use it interchangeably. and this is via perplexity. Thank you. People use it interchangeably with bust. a nut, often in casual or explicit talk. about male orgasms. It applies. specifically to masturbation in context. like solo sessions. >> What do you do you call it bust a nut or. you got something fun like release the. hounds? >> Um I do that like that. Uh one, two, one, two, three. Release them.

>> I do that. >> Yeah, that. >> five, six, seven, eight. >> I do that chocolate stud. That lady that. sings at the funerals, you know. >> No. Who's this? >> You didn't see her? >> Maybe. >> Oh, this is someone I love right here. This is the. >> Oh, I do know this. >> I bet the other dead bodies [crying] are. like type [ __ ] This kind of good.

>> A truck going by. That's a [laughter]. funeral, bro. That's how it is. >> That is like. That's a Hall of Fame stud suit right. there. They need to hang that up. somewhere in a bowling alley. Some. people thought this was Nate Robinson. Dude, >> there you go. [laughter] Right there. Yo, >> she gets hired everywhere now. Shout out. to her. What's her name as well? >> She really She gets hired everywhere.

now. She's blown up. >> She's about to get [ __ ] triple. bookings after this podcast drops. >> She's blown up. She sings. What did she. charge for this? The release him was. hard. That was That was literally like. the smoke at like a DJ set. >> Oh yeah, >> that was sick, man. >> Ni Robinson. >> Release him. >> She really popped off. One, two, three, release them. I wish that heaven had a. phone to call you up, man. That's the. truth, bro. I've always said once I die, I want my body to be shot out of a. cannon into a schoolyard of kids that. are playing. They don't know I'm coming. >> Really? >> Right. Shot over the fence or whatever.

Right. >> Oh, your body or cremated? >> My body? No. >> Oh, nice. Yeah. Yeah. And the first kid. to come up and touch my body gets. everything that I have. >> That's like a Mr. Beast games. >> Yeah. >> Or you should be like a field goal like. for Vanderbilt. Like your body gets shot. through the t-shirt cannon through it. >> Crazy. >> I think. >> it would be cool if you got put into a. special thing in a t-shirt cannon and. they shot you out or something. They. should do [ __ ] like that. It's like. >> um. >> I've been preaching this for a minute. Like there's so many cool like Jenna. reveals where they do like all this. stuff, but you never seen like a viral. cremation. Like I'm sick and tired. Like.

I I I've been writing a bit about it, but like I want my ashes to get blown. out of the exhaust of like a Ford F350. And I want to do half and half. >> Top part cremated, bottom half open. casket. Like I want to do half and half. See that junk? >> Yes, sir. >> I love that. >> But like nobody's doing fun stuff with. like the Ashes. It's always like, "Oh, let's go to Mount Rushmore." Well, so. she can be close to an old president. >> Yeah. >> And I've been there and it's not that. great. They do have good ice cream, but. Yeah. It's not worth going all the way. to the to drop your ashes. I agree. Do. something. Do something great. surprise.

people at a party. There you go. Do this. Civil War type [ __ ] straight out of a. cannon. >> Here we go. Yeah. Where where are you. getting your ashes blown out? >> I don't know. It's a good question. It's. like. >> honestly like a strip club would be far. Just like doing it with ashes. >> Let John Morant throw them out. [laughter]. >> He would do it, dude. He's He has all. those famous like strip club scenes. >> Uh go back to the other thing though. This is good. Ejaculation speed varies, but sources site average speeds around. 27 to 28 miles per hour.

>> That's like two bird scooters. >> Or up to 45 km/h, while sperm itself can. move faster, sometimes reaching 70 km an. hour, though it slows significantly. inside the female reproductive tract. Women will slow anything down. >> Speeds are measured in bursts during. contractions. >> Do the damn makeup. I always think about this like. >> but average ejaculation around 27 to 28. miles per hour, bro. >> I think I like if it was a baseball, I. feel like I could hit it. How fast is. that? I feel like I could hit that.

>> Yeah, cuz. >> 27 miles an hour. Yeah, you could hit. it. If somebody threw a bunch of sperm. at you, you could hit it. >> Cuz MLB complete gay weirdo, you could. [ __ ]. >> But I'm thinking if it was a fast ball. >> Oh, I just say ball and just catch it. I. think you can pause. >> [laughter]. >> I was just thinking, well, this [ __ ] is. already really gay. >> Like, I low-key want to like drive a car. 27 miles an hour down the street right. now just so I can comprehend how fast. that is. >> Well, I will say this. If you got on the. very hood, say somebody drove it 20.

miles an hour, you get on the hood and. you get your wiener just above the front. of the hood and you bust for. >> like a Buick. >> or say you go about 25 miles an hour. Yeah. If you bust, it should kind of. stay in front of you guys just a little. bit. Now, that would be pretty awesome. to see. That's something you guys should. start doing, man. You could use that to. raise money for the for the military. >> Doing that for like Dude Perfect. >> Yeah. Yeah, dude. [laughter]. Cuz dude, you're already perfect. You're. [ __ ] shooting these [ __ ] off of. the mall. You're shooting them off of. like a burning shopping mall into like.

into like a children's dayare. >> They speed up and it gets all over you. >> No, but you're dude, you're already. perfect. Those guys are already perfect. Somebody tell them they're doing hook. shots from like the from like. >> hook [laughter] shot from Ukraine. Yeah. From Ukraine and landing them like in. Russia. Like you're doing great, dude. Like. >> Yeah. It should just be called dudes. done it. They've done it. >> Yeah. You've done it. So start doing. other cool [ __ ] What is this? Ma'am. flips over Corvette driving at 30 m per. hour. Okay, let's watch it. >> We got people on the bus and Matt.

Oh. >> wow. That sound like it hit his legs. It. >> some hit. >> If that's even real. He did a flip. Yeah, that regardless is. pretty cool. >> Is there an exact moment that the nut. actually busts? >> And does it take longer to come out with. a bigger hog cuz it's got more travel. space or does that propel it like a. slide? >> Shouldn't you already know that?

>> I don't study hogs. >> That's true. >> But like if if. >> I'll tell you it doesn't. >> No, it's the same speed. >> I think so. I've never seen a small hog. do it. But wouldn't it have to travel. more? >> Penis size doesn't directly dictate. ejaculation time. Some studies link. larger glands volume to faster. ejaculation while while others Nothing. to see here, Trevor. While others. findings like those are. >> Yeah, I don't think it matters that. much, man. >> I'mma tell that to a woman. >> But you Hey, you want to see something.

travel at 27 to 28 miles an hour in a. minute? That's not a bad line. It's. >> not bad at all. What do you think we get. to 30? >> Hey, come over. You want to see this? You got a speed gun? You ever meet somebody use this cop gun. on this. >> [ __ ] gun? You ever meet somebody and and. wonder like how are you the sperm that. made it? >> Yeah. >> You know what I mean? >> Oh, you realize there was a slim group. of racers. >> Oh, yeah. They were racing on an off. day. >> Yeah. Or there there must have been like. some bad weather that day. But like. sometimes I'm like, how are you that the.

sperm cell that beat everyone else? >> Oh yeah, there's some people that. shouldn't be people. >> Yeah, >> there's some people that shouldn't be. people for sure. Who's top three people. you would like to take out? Or that. don't need to be people. >> It can be a type of person or not like a. race, but like a like somebody who works. at like a. >> let me think. >> like a barista or something. >> Probably. this gay dude that gave my friend uh a. himlic maneuver when we were high on LSD.

at a Wolf house when we were kids. He did too much. He wasn't even choking. He just. >> We don't know if he was. >> clocking him from the back. >> I mean, he did a lot. It was a lot. >> Really? Tell me about that. Like, he was. choking. And. >> Yeah. We were We were on LSD. We went. there and we saw a black gay guy. We'd. never seen it before. So, we didn't even. know what to do, right? We were like, >> "This is in Coington.". >> Yeah. And we're like, "No way." or. whatever. You know, we're freaking out. And we're already freaking out. We're. like, you know, we're probably. >> LSD. >> 15 LSD Waffle House just sitting there.

rattling. How'd you know he was uh a. little. >> He seemed Yeah. He was wearing like. flare and [ __ ] Didn't even have flare. really. Like he was wearing like a lot. of like like exciting flares. >> Light up shoes. >> Yeah. Just [ __ ] that was like Yeah. Like. his whole [ __ ] like his dick was. probably glow-in-the-dark or whatever, you know? So you could just feel like it. felt like something warm was coming out. of his p like if he got close to you. like it's warm in the front of his. pants. >> Okay, I hear you. [snorts]. >> But anyway, yeah, my friend started. choking, I think. And also we were.

laughing so hard cuz we're just so high. and he started him licking him and he. just kept doing it. It was crazy, dude. And I was laughing so hard I was like. [snorts] tears were flying out of my I. couldn't even I I couldn't even try to. save my friend. I was like laughing to. me and my friend was kind of small and. he just kept doing it to him. >> But anyway, >> but you take him out. >> I think we should have a talk. >> Okay. >> I think things, you know, that was kind. of a lot. Um I saw you just went to. Africa, dude. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That was uh that.

was pretty. >> Were you touring over there? No, no. >> You go with your girl? >> No. I was with my family. I was. literally just It was one of those. things where like a year ago my mom. texts a family group chat, which is a. pretty boring chat. Someone's got to. spice it up. Uh my mom just texted and. goes, "Uh, hey, would you guys want to. go to Africa as a family?" Like, uh I. was like, "Yeah, you know, I'm down.". And then it comes like nine months later. like, "Hey, you got to get these shots. Like you're going like this is a thing.". I'm like, "Oh, [ __ ] This is actually. happening." Um, and yeah, I got like. five shots and then went with family,

just did a bunch of safari stuff and it. was pretty cool. I mean, like, >> are you glad you did? >> Yeah, definitely. It I I think it was. fun just being because I haven't done. like a family trip in like over a. decade. So, it was fun to just be with. my parents and my sister for the first. time, like actually doing something in a. while. But, it's so funny that it's like. my brain is so brain rod. There's like. literally a lion eating a zebra in front. of me and I'm like, "Yeah, yeah, yeah.". But like you could see this on reals, >> right? >> Like it it was definitely cool. It was. very surreal seeing cuz the the safaris.

are all at um I don't even know. >> Were you guys in Kenya? Where'd you go? >> Yeah, Kenya. >> Savo and Belli. Which one you guys want. to go to? One of those. >> Uh I'm not sure which one, but we were. in uh kind of like all around the like. like outskirts of Nairobi. And it's like. each one would be like three hours. So. all these are like kind of in like. sanctuaries where the hotel is and then. you travel around the hotel. But. traveling from kind of hotel to hotel. that's really where you see like the. real real side of Africa and that was. like very I want to say like probably. the best sense of community I've ever.

seen. Like everybody's just outside. doing something. Oh, I went on a hot air. balloon. That was the Have you ever been. on a hot air balloon? >> No, I don't know if I have. >> It's Oh, you No, it's it's it was. honestly the coolest thing I've ever. done. It was like, what's crazy is when. the fire is going to propel you, it's. loud as hell, but when it's not, it's. dead silent. And this was at like 7 a.m. >> So, you're just sitting there in the sky. in silence. But, uh, yeah. Seeing the. [clears throat] communities were was so. interesting because, >> dude, that's sick. >> Everybody's outside. Everybody's like.

like nobody's really like hanging on. their phones, which. >> Well, some people might have phones and. they don't have air conditioning, too. >> Yeah. I but like just. >> it's also part of the culture just being. alive and like seeing what's going on. >> Everybody was either like no matter. where you were going there was just. people just like walking. There's always. some that I don't know man. It it's just. it was really a cool perspective to see. like like that lit like I'm seeing. elephants like this close in front of me. and I'm like acting like this is normal. >> Yeah dude that's beautiful man. >> It was actually really beautiful and I I. had a great time. Um I'm trying to think.

about funny stuff that happened out. there if any. Um. >> that's amazing. And do they have a lot. of the like wiggas over there or. anything like that or is it not. >> just me but not that I No, I mean. >> cuz that's where they would really be at. cuz otherwise that's kind of an American. thing then I guess. I don't know if I saw like any like. >> that's where they. >> local white people. >> but I'm just saying they got to have. some and if they do are some of them you. know. >> well I think they go there in disguise.

taking notes and then bring it back over. here Yeah, they're like a secret spy for. back home. >> What about MGK? You think he's one or. No, >> I think graduated. >> He Yeah, once you put like a paper clip. in as an earring, I think you've you've. graduated. >> Zimmerman is one. >> Is he? >> Yeah. >> I don't know. I'm not super familiar. with his music, but I know he's very. popular. >> Yeah. >> Um, who else out there is? >> I don't know. But I'm just saying if. they don't have them there, then it's an. American thing or it's a British thing.

>> What are we talking about? >> Wigas. What are you talking about? >> I don't know. I was trying to think. about other artists who might get. allegations. >> Oh, no. I'm just saying. I mean, Elton. John was kind of one even though he. never. >> Was he really? >> I think he was kind of just from his. style for sure. John was a wiggle. things. >> Huh. >> I think he's more on like the wiggle. side of thing. >> Well, I mean, I think it's very close. >> Yeah. >> If you wiggle enough, a brother will. show up, you know? So, I think like you. wiggle enough, somebody's going to. cornrow your hair and light a [ __ ].

blunt for you. You know [laughter]. >> who's who's the OG, would you say? >> Oh, the OG's. I mean, there's. >> Would it would it be Elvis? >> Oh, that's a good call. Michael Rapaort. was kind of one, I think, in his day, >> for sure. >> Who's that guy? Giani. >> Johnny Paulo. >> He's the front runner. He's He's He's. Heisman. He's for sure. >> We go to the UFC fights all the time. He. is Heisman. >> Every time I see a photo of him, his. chains get bigger and bigger. Either. >> get stolener and stolener. That's the. Oh, yeah. >> He gets them stolen. Yeah, this [ __ ] has.

been [ __ ]. >> dude. I like we're boys on Instagram. I've never met him in real life, but. every time I see him, he's flexing more. and more money. I'm like, how many. episodes of Power were you on? >> The best, bro. He's going to need some. power to [ __ ] it. He's going to need. some power to keep people off his. chains, bro. >> Did he get snatched like that? >> I think it happens a lot within the. culture. It's part of the culture. It's. kind of like hot. It's like uh. >> he almost seems like a sting operation. >> It's like capture the flag kind of. Some. people say he's a fed. Some people say. he snitched on Diddy. >> Did he? >> I don't know. But I've just heard a lot. of that [ __ ] Some people say he's a.

fed. I mean, look at him. >> But he's got to be like the Heisman for. that community. >> I think if you had Every year they. should Heisman up a wig, I think. >> Yeah. And I think. >> Who do they got for 2025? I think this. guy is a candidate. >> Him. I think you put MGK in there, though. I don't think I I MGK is kind of. his own thing, though. >> I would say. >> he's just multifaceted. I think he's, you know, >> I think Refe's up there a little bit. Fresh off of Wild and Out. >> Oh, Matt Refe definitely. He definitely. >> Wild Out days with the abs. You can't. have great abs and not be wigan.

>> Now he's more kind of like. >> I think Rife has Wiga in him. >> Yeah. >> Or Hdub. Hidden Wiga they call it. >> Uh I'm trying to think of who else. Oh, maybe that um Oh, Dan Bongino. >> Tim Walls. Tim Dylan. Maybe Tony the. Tiger probably. Uh that guy that was in. uh. Salt Saltburn. Saltburn but not the main. guy. Barry Ky Hogan. >> Barry Ky Hogan. >> Is he?

>> I could see it. He's Irish. Almost all. Irish people are. >> All right. Yeah, I feel like there's. some obvious ones that I'm missing. >> Oh, I thought that was a picture of damn. uh. >> I think Shalamé is a little bit. >> He could low-key have some in him. I. thought this was a picture of uh who are. those lion tamers in Vegas. >> Pen and Teller. >> No. >> [ __ ] Uh. >> I thought that was Sig Freedom Roy. That's. >> Oh, I thought that was like Sigman. Freud. >> I don't [laughter] even know, dude. But. no, it's h I'm just glad to know what's. happening out there. Dude, did you see.

in uh when speed uh I show speed raced. that cheetah? >> Dude, he did he beat it? >> Pull it up. See if. >> the cheetah's running cuz the real speed. is what can go faster, a cheetah or nut. >> We'll find out right now. Let's see. that. >> We about to race. >> Come on, baby. >> What the You see that? This scratched him.

What the [ __ ]. >> Wait, I'm lost. >> I am speed. >> Dang. >> Wait, so how fast was he? It said 110. mph. That's just not real. >> It said the cheetah hit up to 92 mph at. some point. I don't know if that was I. mean, this is these are all edits, but. still the fact that he raced a cheetah. is wild. What's an animal you could race. and beat? You think? >> Rooster. >> But if they're not flying, >> like if they're only running,

>> they can't fly. >> But they can like kind of jump start a. little bit. >> They go 9 miles an hour. >> Yeah, I could beat it. >> I don't know. Nine miles, dude. Could. you run 9 miles in an hour? >> Throughout the day. Yeah. [laughter]. >> It's not throughout the day, bro. It's. in one hour. You only get one hour. You. only get one part of a day. >> 9 miles in an hour. >> And they can briefly reach up to 15. miles an hour when they're flapping. their wangs. Me, too. I could beat a. [laughter]. crazy. >> I could beat a rooster off like a 40. yard dash if he's not using his wings. What about you?

>> I don't know. I'm trying to think of an. animal that I could really like uh. >> I think anything at Petco. That's not. true. Anything that's caged at a Petco. pony I could beat. >> Pony. >> Oh, I don't know. Small ponies are. quick. >> No, ponies are fast. [snorts]. >> That's a good question. What's a good. animal I could beat? Probably something. that's been using. >> Yeah. What what animals can we see what. animals run beneath 10 miles per hour. >> because I think I can run 10 miles an. hour for a minute 30. So I don't know.

what that math is but I could do that. >> Many animals run blow to miles sloths. giant tortoises. Koalas, banana slugs, snails. Oh, these all suck. >> First of all, what the hell is under the. manatees? What the hell is a woodcock? >> Yeah, I'll fight a woodcock. >> What is that? I don't know. It's a good question. Um, >> you should be starting the O of in the. military. >> American Woodcock, homie. Oh, yeah. I'll. I'll race I'll race [laughter] that. thing. Look at the [ __ ] beer belly on. that thing. >> Oh yeah. The loggers.

>> I'll race the balls off of that little. [ __ ] [laughter]. >> I'll race the balls off that little air. twink. Look at that thing. [ __ ]. >> Bro, I'll serve some seed right out of. my [ __ ] wiener to that thing, boy. Dude, would you let that thing [ __ ]. reach into your wiener to get a piece of. seed? Look at that. >> Look at that spout on him. >> I feel like that would hurt. But if I. was if I was under anesthesia, I guess. >> what? [laughter]. >> Like I like if like like if they were. already like like if I had to get a.

colonoscopy and they're already like. doing that, you're like. >> I'd let him [ __ ] just sniff in there. for a second and see what's going on, [laughter] bro. Like it's like the can. it's like the canary in the coal mine, you know? >> Yes, sir. Well, I think he should be. doing more kind of the gyno stuff. Like. the contraptions they have to use to. check out the insides of a woman. I. mean, they they seem so industrial. They. seem like they found it in a warehouse. in like a GMC in like 1960s. Like it's. like a clamp. Like for It also feels. like disrespectful to the woman where. like, "Yeah, we just got to go and open.

up in there. >> This is a Trans Am.". >> Yeah. Like they use one of those things. that they used to use to like lift your. car up. >> Yeah. >> But like that that's to keep a fire. going, [laughter] you know? Like sometimes they'll use like an. accordion, you know, like. >> I know, dude. It's tough. >> It's definitely ridiculous. Oh, we don't. need to look at all that. That's crazy. >> Well, it's also Yeah, that bird is kind. of what it's replicating. I feel like. that bird does the gynos of the nest. >> That bird's a party bird. >> Um, did you see the uh you saw 6ix9ine.

is going to the same prison as Maduro? Did you see that? >> He's in there with uh Luigi, Diddy, Maduro. I don't know if that's true, but. I saw it on a meme. >> That's crazy. But I guess it makes sense. they keep ming in prison. Let me see. what this 6ix9. >> arrested President Maduro and his wife. >> That's crazy, right? Um, all right. So, it's mad thing. So, I got. the call. >> I love how he's doing PR for jail. He's. like doing a podcast run to promote. jail. >> Somebody text me saying that they think.

that when they send me to um. when they sent me to uh prison on. Tuesday, me and Maduro is going to be in. the same unit. But do you think he's. going to prison for PR? Like why is he. even What is he going What charges is he. there for? >> That's a great question. What charges is. he there for? I wonder if he'd be a good. guest whenever he gets out, you think? >> Yeah. Have you ever met him? >> I never met him. >> Rapper Tekashi69. uh has faced various charges primary. stemming from his association with the.

Nine Trey Bloods. Uh. what's he going to jail for right now? Oh, um and jail sentence in early 2026. uh received another three-month sentence. for new violations, including having. cocaine and ecstasy in his Miami home. and punching a man who taunted him. Well, sometimes you got to do that. But. damn. Yeah, I think it could be. interesting just to see what his life is. like and stuff. >> They should give him like a Twitch. stream from jail. >> Yeah. >> If he's on a run here, >> that'd be wild. Well, I just feel like.

everything is going to start merging. They're going to have to start funding. like if if the government can't keep. things going, they're going to. everything is going to have to be. started be funded kind of privately or. by people or by like, you know, so I. wouldn't be surprised if you start to. see like Twitch streams from jail. I. wouldn't be surprised if you start to. see like um the army uh or the military. start to like have stream or have um. >> content, right? I just think that that. stuff's going to kind of grow a lot, you. know? Like I'll be on Tik Tok live just. and it'll just pop up and there's like. always and if you're chronically online,

you've seen this on Tik Tok, they'll. just show like a bar like it's just like. behind the bartender and he's just. working and there's just a bar. >> Yeah. >> For what? And they're like monetizing. that. They're just showing security. camera of places. >> Yeah. >> And just getting money from it. >> Oh, dude. But I used to watch like uh. these like in like different funerals. from different countries like you could. watch like Indian funerals and stuff and. they'd have streams of it and like on. YouTube or like just long clips of it. Yeah. You can just watch like it's it's. it's neat to have kind of like um just.

like a thing you can just watch. It. >> just blows my mind like the effect of. live. Like if somebody was like, "Hey, here's a 20-minute video." I'd be like, "I don't want to watch that." But. they're like, "Here's a stream." You'll. end up watching 20 minutes like in the. blink of an eye. >> Well, let's go a little bit more to that. prison. Who else was in there? Who else. has been in there? Is there any articles. on it in there? >> Hall of Fame. >> Is he in or out of jail? He's He's got. those Rico charges. >> Hezbollah? >> Yeah. Doesn't he? >> He has a twin sister. You know that? >> No. I didn't know this. >> Hasboul has a twin sister. >> Yes. Hazbulah Magomeov was arrested in.

his native Dagistan in May 2023 for. traffic violations. Of course. >> Any. >> He couldn't reach the pedal. >> Yeah. [laughter] What are we even. talking about? Including blocking a road. and doing donuts with friends. while. celebrating a wedding. Bro, put him in a. Whimo and call it a day. >> First of all, you have to know that if. he gets into a car, [laughter]. just shut the road down for a couple. minutes. >> Unless it's a Fisher Price. What car was. he whipping in? >> He was released under house arrest after.

being granted bail and had to wear an. ankle monitor around his neck. No way. >> They just turned him into a Rottweiler. [laughter]. >> Do you think being on house. >> made that part up? He later apologized. for the incident, stating. [clears throat] he wasn't driving and. promised it wouldn't happen again. I. love that in their country there's such. a code of honor you can just at least. promise that it won't happen again. >> That's awesome. I mean, do you think. being on a house arrest as a smaller. person is like nice? >> I bet it's kind of nice, especially for. a busy guy like him because he gets, you.

know, he just gets a little bit of time. to himself. >> Al Sharpton's locked up. >> Notable inmates that have been held at. MDC Brooklyn. >> Oh. Oh. Oh. Metropolitan Detention Center in. Brooklyn has gained significant. notoriety for housing and an unusually. high concentration of high-profile. federal defendants including uh Maduro, Luigi Manion, uh Diddy R. Kelly, Sam. Bankman Freed, uh Chap El Chapo, Michael. Cohen, Gilain Maxwell, Martin Skrey, and.

Al Sharpton. Wow. >> If you care, it's Sam Bankman Freed. >> Sam Bankman Freed. I just thought it was. funny that he named him like his two. last names were the two things that he. was. He was like this bank man and then. he was also fried all the time right. there. >> So to me it was like the most perfect. like. >> he's in jail for what what did he do. again? >> He might be out now. Sam. >> was convicted and sentenced to 25 years. in prison while for orchestrating. massive fraud at his crypto exchange. FTC. Found guilty of seven counts. including wire fraud, conspiracy to.

commit fraud. Yep, he's in there. So. he'll be in there for a I feel like the. NFT people are kind of like NFTs got so. swept under the rug, but there were so. many people who pulled massive money. from that and just kind of they made. like NFT like clubs and NFT like. >> and then that all just disappeared. [clears throat]. >> Yeah. And nobody talks about it. >> Um, did you see the new uh this is the. new way that they're thinking that. incarceration could happen? This is with. AI and technology. This is fascinating. See if you can find that story of the. pods. >> What is this? >> Yes. The future of incarceration.

>> This is no longer about us. Honestly, I. think it's too late, but it's about our. generations to come, your children, your. grandchildren, your great-grandchildren. There is a company called Cognify. If. you Google it and watch their video, and. it's the future of incarceration is what. it's titled. With this Cognify system, let's say you do a crime or maybe you. act out against the government or you. have a belief system that is not. consistent with the country that you. live in and you are prosecuted for a. crime by their definition. You will then. get an opportunity to choose. Let's just.

use this for hypothetical. A measly. petty theft. You can spend 50 years in. prison or you can go through the cognify. process which in 3 minutes they will. imprint memory set. So let's say there. was someone who was even harmed by the. crime that you did. You will be able to. feel the emotions of your victim. The. emotions that the family members went. through all of that. You will you will. be forced to have the empathy and you. will feel like you've been imprisoned. for 25 years or whatever it may be but. it's only 3 minutes. >> [ __ ] that. They need that. They need. that [ __ ] for when my girlfriend comes.

up to me after she had her period the. next day and goes, "I'm so sorry about. last night. I'm on my period." Okay. Well, you need to feel what I was. feeling last night for getting yelled. at. >> Get into the Cognify machine. But dude, eventually if they have an at home one, that'd be crazy. But this is saying this. is like reverse ice bathing. Like sit in. this and feel awful about yourself. >> But this is saying that if you did a. crime and if you could I'm I'm guessing. it's probably something you'd have to. afford. If you could afford Cognify, then you'd be able to go and serve your. sentence in Cognify. You would have all. the things that would really feel like.

in your brain had happened and the and. in five minutes you could do 20 20. years. >> Fascinating because like one you could. pay off the guy who who hits the buttons. and then he's like, "All right, here we. go." Then you're like, "Oh, ow. It's. hurting.". >> Well, I I mean I think here it says, "Cognify is a futuristic prison concept. proposed by scientist Hasham al Ga G.". >> He's the newest member of FaZe Clan, by. the way. [laughter]. >> Yeah. that uses AI and brain implants to. replace long sentences with brief. intense rehabilitation. So, it's almost.

like an EMDR but extremely deep into. your brain. AI generated memories. Artificial vivid memories are created by. AI to simulate the impact of a crime on. victims. Dude, this should be crazy. Inmates experience years of remorse and. understanding in a short time, allowing. for quicker release and reintegration. I. mean, it kind of makes sense cuz that's. what you're supposed to be there for. I. just wonder how long would that stay, you know? Well, what if you just go into. prison for like a little while and it's. just a bunch of you don't learn. anything. It's just a bunch of dudes.

that's run a train on you or whatever. That'd be my. >> That's what I'm saying. Like you you use. up for 3 minutes and now you're just. limping, >> man. Dude, what if you get out and. you're like and then your wife lies. She's like, "Yeah, I left while you were. gone. You were gone so long." You're. like, >> "I was gone for two songs on Spotify.". >> Yeah, dude. >> Well, that's the interesting part. It's. like, >> what the [ __ ] And your son's like, "Yeah, we have a new stepdad." And. you're like, "What?" [laughter]. Bro, that would be the scary thing is. what if they just bring you back and. like, "Oh, yeah, man. You just got a. couple of uh MS13 guys got a hold of you. and now you're like el gay or whatever,

[laughter] you know?" And that would be. the scariest part to me, bro. >> The crazy part is like if they're doing. this in 3 minutes, it's like you leave. your house at 10:00 a.m., you're like, "Oh, I committed this crime. I'm so. sorry." You come back, you're back at. noon, and all of a sudden you have all. the remorse for, you know, burning down. an Arby's. And now you're like, "I. didn't I didn't think the fry cook was. is still in there." And I like now now. you just have this feeling of regret the. rest of your life, but you still have. the rest of your life to live like. >> Yeah. But I think it's a shortcut. >> It'll be a shortcut and I think it'll be. for people that can afford it because.

here's what you'll be able to do. People. will the Arby's family, they'll have. some sort of like other part of it. that's like an an attorney part of it. where it's like, okay, you can make do. right now. You can pay restitution. You. burn down the Arby's. you killed two, you know, a fry cook and um someone in. the drive-thru who refused to leave. without their order even though the. place was burning down. >> and one other counterperson. You can. settle out of court with them all right. now for $300,000. >> and then it's just going to be like this. fasttrack thing. It's like yeah, you're. off the hook and you feel the remorse.

and you you you keep living. >> So. if you shoot someone, you only you would. you feel that person's pain? I think. they just want you to feel the So you. would feel the pain of their family. members and stuff like that. They would. have ways that they could embed that. into you. >> Yeah, that would [ __ ] you up. I mean, both those would [ __ ] you up for life. But what if you do like tax fraud killed. some people at an Arby's? You should. >> Absolutely. Right. Right. Right. Right. It should [ __ ] you up. >> Yeah. You can't be Scott off scot-free. >> What? So how would that work with like. tax fraud? Like like who.

the government's No, >> that's a good point. Maybe they wouldn't. allow it for certain crimes. Mhm. >> Or if they would able to get the money. back from you. I'm not sure. That's a. good question. >> How fast would they do this? I feel like. >> I don't That's crazy. >> Yeah. >> But they probably are finding ways to. speed up prison sentences but still have. the same effects. >> Well, it seems kind of archaic the way. that we do it. Kind of. It's like this. guy's in there for 50 years. Nothing. ever h it's like. >> it goes through all these boards and.

it's never, you know, >> so long. >> And it's just like such a drain on the. system. It's just I'd love to find out. more about that. Like I cuz I know a lot. of it is just like some kind of money. laundering thing, you know. >> Yeah. Have you ever been to a prison? >> I don't think I have. I've been in a. jail. >> What's the difference? >> I never been to a prison. A jail is just. like a little gay ass prison. Nobody's. even getting gayed out or whatever in. it. It's just people waiting for lunch. and [ __ ] and like. >> people waiting for dick. >> Jails are local short-term facilities. for those awaiting trial or serving.

sentences. You can't even find a gang in. a jail, you know? You can find like one. dude that'll like. >> like like. >> like a pen pal to another gang. [laughter]. >> Yeah, you can find one dude who might. [ __ ] slip half a Hershey's under your. door at night or whatever. But there's. no long-term institution there. Those. are more uh for prisons. >> Yeah, cuz they do like somebody like. tours like when you go to different. cities, you want to see like where Elvis. live or something like I think they. should tour jails for income. Like I'm. just curious what's going on in there. Like I want to do a episode of Scared. Straight, but like.

I but I just want to see what's going. on. Like I'm just curious. Like if there. was a jail live stream on Twitch, I. would watch every day. >> It's just like it's you never hear about. anything there. So to watch it, it. almost feels illegal. >> Well, there's a lot of shows about it. now that people I mean people are into. those types of into that type of. viewing, I think, for sure. Dude, I. don't know if I'd be good in jail, dude. I wouldn't. >> No, >> I'd [ __ ] hate it. Unless my cellmate. like had an we could start a little band. or something. I don't think I would be. that good in there if I had something to. look forward to as like a group or. whatever. >> Yeah. What would you do if you got.

approached by gang members? >> I'd have to join. >> Yeah. >> What you going to say? You could say, "Let me think about it for a day or. two." But they're only going to probably. give you two days. >> Yeah. I would treat it like I was a. record label like and I was a rapper. I. be I'm just seeing what other offers I. get. >> I think I would blind myself or. something. So nobody's going to hurt a. blind guy. I think. >> Dude, I feel like unfortunately that's. the number one target because you can't. snitch. So like what did he feel like? Knuckles. >> Yeah. Huh. >> I don't know. I I don't know. I That'd.

be scary to me cuz. I don't I don't know, man. [sighs and gasps] I guess yeah, you'd. have to join a gang. I would probably go. Mexican gang. I feel like it might be. the food might be better. I don't know. I don't know if black gangs are making. food in there. >> I don't know. >> What's the worst gang to join in there? >> Prison gangs in the United States. Aryan. Brotherhood, Black Gorilla Mafia, Mexican Mafia, Luestra Familia, Texas. Syndicate. That sounds kind of like new. and novel. >> All these sound like a really good like.

NFL league. >> And the net. >> for the XFL. >> Oh yeah. All. >> they bring the XFL back. Start with. these teams. >> The Tennessee type [ __ ] dude. Put them. in [laughter] there. >> Tennessee fightings. >> Dude, they should have more. They got to. start putting these people into teams. doing something. >> There's got to be a better way. >> It's all going to happen, man. Everything's merging. Everything's. getting weird. Yes. It's all becoming. Long John Silvers and Baskin Robbins, dude. There's no It's all becoming the. Army fans. It's all starting to merge. We're going to start to see this kind of. stuff a lot, you know.

>> But I think they should take all the. inmates and like give them some athletic. thing to look forward to and then they. can stream it. It's like I would. absolutely watch the Texas uh syndicate. versus the Puerto Ricans. >> Oh yeah. If you had a basketball game. tonight, >> that's what I'm saying. Like. >> it was Lou Familia versus Aryan. Brotherhood at 900 p.m. First one to 11. No three-pointers. Dude, I would [ __ ]. watch that. I feel like the ABA is only. hitting threes. They're not they're not. doing the work in the paint. >> The it beats the big three [ __ ]. league in a heartbeat. I would But you.

should put one of these leagues into the. big three league. They got to start to. just diversify. >> But I'm saying like if these guys even. just play like that might bring some. unity. It's like UFC. They talk [ __ ]. before the fight then after the game. they like dap up. They're like I have. nothing more respect for this guy. I. love this guy. Maybe there could be some. of that where like if they're playing. each other they're [ __ ] talking. Sure. But afterwards like hey type [ __ ] type. [ __ ]. >> type [ __ ] And then they could stream it. and you could watch it on like Rumble or. wherever the Paramount Plus or. something. But like I feel like. >> Oh yeah, Nick Foes would host it. probably. I mean, I think he [laughter]. would probably do it.

Especially if it's on Rumble. He's like. their lead guy over there. >> Yeah. I I I like there's got to be a way. because they would also probably feel. like imagine being in jail, but like. every day you're training for a game on. Saturday. Like you have something to. look forward to. >> I agree. That's the kind of stuff you. need in there. >> Even though you're a murderer, you still. like Yeah. But. >> them threes, [ __ ] Boom. from downtown. because shots went in downtown. >> He's a killer. Yeah. Shots fired. That's. one of his name. >> Shots, dude. They'd have cool ass names, too. >> Stabby for three. >> Yeah.

>> Like Bobby Lee always makes that sound. >> Um uh uh before we get out of here, how. >> you have a special coming up? >> Uh I'm shooting one in March. I'm. shooting a special March 13th, the 14th. in Arizona. >> In Phoenix? >> Yeah, in Phoenix. >> Nice. >> Super excited. Um. >> it's going to be sick. >> Phoenix is just a great comedy town. I'm. really excited. Uh, >> I might go shoot my special there. Maybe. it's not a bad idea. >> It's a great city. It's a great city. It's I mean, you're out here now, but. like it's so close to LA and I've just. never Some states like uh I'll say Ohio. is a hit or miss state for me. Sometimes.

you're like, "This is the best show of. my life special." Or you're like, "Cool, get me to the top of Lita uh with Cement. Shoes." So, you're like always in. between. Uh I am on tour right now. I'm. doing the Rhyman tomorrow. If you want. to do a spot, I would love to have you. on there. That'd be sick as [ __ ]. >> Yeah, man. Maybe I'll pop out. I haven't. been on stage in a while. >> Really? Yeah, >> dude. I mean, the the crowd would just. literally nut 28 miles per hour to see. you do 5 minutes. Um, >> but I'll come out. I'll come out. >> Yeah. And then I'm doing the Wheel Turn, which I opened for you at the Wheelturn. a couple years ago. That's a great great.

spot. Um, >> yeah, I'm doing a bunch. I have like. >> Ventura, Cleveland. You got a lot of. good spots. >> Yeah. All California. I'm doing Reno. I'm doing I'm doing a lot of places I've. never done before. Like Oakland, Reno, uh, Memphis, Fresno, Bakersfield, St. Abyspo Sacramento. >> You guys got to go see it, man. It's a. great It's just entertaining. It's great. energy the whole set. Um Yeah, dude. You're so great up there, bro. Make sure. to send me this, too, so I can share it. on socials, too, whenever uh after today. or after this episode goes up. >> Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Please.

>> And your tour is called Trevor Wallace. Presents Alpha Beta Male. >> Alpha Beta Male. Yeah. Just because I. feel like that my brain is split in. between like being this like alpha male. versus like this beta male. It's like I. find just more kind of unity between. both of them. And I feel like every. decision I make has like an alpha side. versus a beta side in me. It's not like. one of those like red pill, blue pill. type shows. But it is just like a funny. thing to be like. >> people are you this, you that. I'm like. I feel like I'm kind of in between. >> Yeah. A lot of fun. >> Yeah, dude. I think it also happens as. you get as you grow up a little bit too. It's like you kind of get two sides of.

it, you know? >> It's like, you know, there's days you're. like, you know, >> Yeah. It's always It used to be like. I'll bust a nut wherever, you know what. I'm saying? I'll bust a nut at this. [ __ ] party or whatever. I like. [laughter] the [ __ ] you know, you know, dude, I remember I went to a. one-year-old's birthday party. This is. at a time when like, you know, when I. was dealing with sobering and relapsing. >> I went to a one-year-old's birthday. party and ended up buying cocaine there. somehow. >> from the one-year-old. >> No, from an adult. >> They're like, "Blow out the candles.".

And you heard the word blow and you're. like, "Where?" [laughter]. >> Yeah. Goes to show you anything can. happen out there, man. >> Yeah. I just feel like my brain has like. it's more so like all there's there's a. second guessing element to almost. everything that I do where it's like the. example I I say on stage is like I've. had this thought before like I wanted to. like spit in a girl's mouth but then. another thought was like but what if I. miss. >> Yeah. But but like that's not how dirty. talk works. That's not like how being. hot in the bed works is like you just do. it. >> Yes. You have to be that Yeah. You have. to be present. But but you know, it's.

like or I'm like scared to like slap a. girl's ass in the bed because I'm like. sometimes you don't get the the pop and. you get the you get the dud. >> Yeah. >> Sounds like you're just trying to get. the dog on the couch. Like and for me. I'm trying to like So I overthink. everything. >> It's so embarrassing too when you get. the dud. >> They hear it. >> They hear it too. >> Then they a good person you're dating. won't address it. A [ __ ] will be like, >> "Yeah, [laughter]. >> the [ __ ] are you?" Yeah. Or that's when. you have to yell out, "That was loud, huh?" Yeah. Yeah. Or that's when you. yell out be like, "Yeah, but you.

probably need some lotion. It's a little. dry back here.". >> Yeah. Damn. >> Or that or you do what like dads do when. they're like moving into a house and. they just start checking like, "How's. this the structure?" [laughter]. >> Yeah. The getting a dud is is But like. But literally that's all my thought. process is is like there's a part of my. brain that's like slap ass. But then the. other parts it's like what if you get a. dud? >> Yeah. What if you miss a little? You get. a little fire. You hit that bone. That's. a crazy. >> That's assault. >> Yeah. >> That's literally assault. Yeah, [laughter] dude. And then now you're. like, how am I going to bust at 27 miles.

an hour now? >> And then it comes out like 12 miles an. hour. It's dude, I'm like I'm probably. the most one of the most in my head guys. I can be. And I I just like once I start. thinking about that like and I This is. more graphic, but we're like pretty deep. into the podcast. If I start thinking, oh no, I'm not going to be able to bust, then I can't. >> It's all mental for me. >> Like like if a girl even says like, "Are. you going to be able to?" Then it's out. the window. >> cuz now it's all I'm thinking about. Or. if I get too hot, I got to run to the. [ __ ] sink like a little gopher and. >> Oh, if the AC comes on or whatever.

>> Oh, yeah. Well, the AC is a little gay. blown on your back. That's. >> Well, the fan on it. People who could. come with the fan on. I thought those. are Navy Seals, dude. [laughter] Anybody. who can have probably Air Force. >> Yeah, I said I said this on stage like. anybody who can have sex with a fan on. is a [ __ ] Yeah, that's Air Force, dude. Bro, you deserve to have an Only. Fans and support our country. Why would. you want to make the room colder to now? Like that's going to make things uh. probably smaller, I'm guessing. >> Oh, but it's just crazy to have just. anybody who could have sex with a fan on.

is insane. >> It's literally like a cuck situation cuz. you're like, "Who's this other man in. the room?" Oh, yeah. It's a ceiling fan. >> Yeah. I couldn't do it. Not. >> a lot of pressure, dude. >> I just But but I do that with everything. career-wise. I overthink everything. I I. >> But it helps you do your meticulous. That's what it is. It is. >> And it keeps you where you are. And it's. like, you know, you started, your career. started off so hot. And a lot of times. you see guys like that and it's hard for. them to figure it out, you know. How. long were you doing content before you. got into standup? >> I was doing stand up first. But but but. >> Oh, you were? >> Yeah. But but like maybe.

>> But you've still only been doing it now. like what? Seven years. >> 10. >> Oh, have you really? Oh, [ __ ] I'm. losing every. >> No, no, you're good, man. You're good. I. I don't know why uh you'd know that. Um. um uh how is everything going with Buzz. Boys? >> Bus Boys is good, dude. We're going to. It's going to come out in a couple of. weeks. Uh oh, no. It's gonna come out in. a couple of months. >> Really? >> So, I think we're going to go into. theaters. >> Oh, [ __ ] it. >> And then, uh, it looks like And we're. figuring that out right now. And then. we'll probably go direct to consumer to. direct to people. >> Any streamer? Oh, I guess that probably. happens after you go theaters and then a.

buyer. >> We'll see. I think it's also you have to. present to them when it's fully done and. show them what it looks like, you know? So, it's been a long it's been a. learning curve. It's been a lot. It's. been a lot of stuff. you realize it's. like, oh, this is a big undertaking. But. it I I I realized it could be a lot. easier next time. >> Yeah. >> And um we had a lot of things that were. like in the way and made things tough, too. Like the fires, moved everything at. the last minute by a week and just all. these little things that change. everything. >> Um but learned a ton. Self- financed it.

We made it ourselves, you know, and like. wrote it ourselves and completely like. >> So that that part I think I feel really. excited about and I think it should be I. think it's good. I'm just, you know, you've seen it so many times, you're. like, I don't even know what's going on. here. But you're in it. >> I'm in it. I'm Dude, I'm. >> forget it's been so long. >> I'm so happy that I got tapped for that. I I I watched the full thing and it's. like I think the storyline is so there. It's like it it it's it's dumb to say, but you're like, "Yeah, this is a. movie." It's not like somebody who tried. to make a movie. It's like this is a.

movie. Like this is a start to finish. movie. Yeah. And the story line was I. was impressed. It was it's. >> Yeah. It's not groundbreaking, but also. was our first time doing it. It was like. we had to make sure that this piece. matches with this piece, but I do think. it moves quick and it was funny. It was. a lot of great cameos and stuff. >> I love the cameos. The cameos are great, man. And it's uh but yeah, it's like. even when I saw the trailer, Spade. showed me at the uh the improv between. all of his Riot matches, but he showed. me uh [laughter]. >> he does. >> No. Uh. >> no, he does. He's got him. >> Uh but even the trailer, like as dumb as.

this sounds, I'm like, dude, this is a. this is a movie trailer. Yeah. Like like. even if I had I don't even know like I. could just be a random guy or at the. radio shack and I watch I'm like dude. this [ __ ] movie looks sick, right? >> Like it it it it feels everything like a. movie. So any doubt you have. >> just cuz I know you you very. >> I feel I think a lot. >> Yeah. >> I almost slap the bone, you know? >> Right. But as an outsider perspective, like dude, this is a [ __ ] movie. movie. So like the fact it's going into. theaters and then direct like I'm I'm.

fired up. >> You guys should feel confident about. that. >> Yeah, absolutely. >> Yeah, dude. There it is. There it is. Yeah, >> it was fun. I can't even believe it all. happened, >> right? >> I mean, it was a crazy time in the year. and it just all happened so fast. It was. like 23 days in a row we shot and it was. just a [ __ ] It was a lot, dude. But. you crushed it. We got to do something. again. >> Please, man. >> Let's get this out so we can make a new. one, huh? Type [ __ ]. >> I know. And And that's the thing, like, you know, it's just I I have so many. ideas that I hold on to and I shoot it. for so long by the time I go to like. pose, I'm like, "What the [ __ ] even is. this?". >> So art has like an expiration date. It.

feels like for the artist, but it's like. once you put it out there, it's like. like how you felt making it, that's. that's how it should be perceived a. little bit. That that that um what what. is that book? I'm blanking on his name. >> It's great book with the circles on it. Rick Rubin. >> Have you read that book? >> What's it called? >> He's great though, huh? >> He has a book and it's all about just uh. yeah, the creative act. Dude, I really. love this book. It's um. >> the creative act, a way of being. >> I would check it out. Have you had him. on the pod? >> I haven't. >> He would be a great guest. >> I would like to see some great clips of. him. He's just his whole perception on.

art is like put it out and once it's out. like you at one point you love the. project. Don't let the outcome. >> dictate how it is. Like when you when. you started writing it, you loved it. When you were when you were creating. with your friends, you loved it. So if. it I I apply it to a lot of videos. because at one point when filming it or. writing it or editing or all that, I. loved it. And then if I post it and it. doesn't do well, I go, "Ah, [ __ ] The. video sucked." They go, "No, no, no.". But like I I had the care for it at one. point. >> And it's sometimes you sit on projects. for so long that you lose that care. So,

it's it's it's important to kind of put. those things out before and it's not. that you lose that care, but your life. just changes. >> Yeah. >> And what you find funny in 2024 versus. 2025 is different. So, >> yeah. Sometimes it's tough to keep. something going, but also, you're right, to remember like, man, at one time I had. so much faith in this and believed in. this and I knew it was good, right? Um. >> and and I still think you should. >> I really do. >> Thanks, bro. No, I think I needed to. hear something like that, too. We're. looking at some last like coloring. scenes right now.

>> Man, you should do a small screening in. Nashville and just like not anybody who. will just glaze who's like [ __ ] Theo. like just like literally like like 30. people and just show it and just be like. what were your takeaways? >> Yeah. >> Would you like what felt good? What. felt? >> We probably need to do that soon. Maybe. we'll do one out in LA too, man. >> Yeah, absolutely, man. >> You know when we do. Um yeah, super. excited for that to come out. >> You got the tour right now. Uh we'll. share those uh on our socials as well. Um, yeah. I'll come out to tomorrow. night and do a set, dude. Great. Yeah. >> [ __ ] yeah.

>> Who else is on the show? Blasting. >> Uh, Zack Townson. You know him? Zack. Townson. And I think John Chris is doing. set. >> Yeah, >> dude. It's going to be Nashville's. finest. >> It's going to be like They're going to. take a screenshot of this and put it up. next to that New York City prison post. and be like, [laughter] "Dude, >> they had mom dammy in that [ __ ]. >> I don't know who's up in there.". >> Thanks so much for coming, bro. Yeah. Congrats on everything. Thanks for the. inspiration, dude. Yeah, you just always. keep on going, dude. You keep staying. creative and it's it's great to see. I'm. glad we get to catch up, >> dude. It means a lot coming from you. Like, holy [ __ ] Um, yeah, you got no. choice not to,

>> you know, get a gift, so use it. >> This is it. >> God bless. Thank you for having me. And. gang gang. >> Gang gang. >> Sign off. >> Nardwire. >> That was like a nardwire sign off. Gang. gang. >> Good night, Nardo. I'm Nard. We're. Nardoir. >> I'm falling like these [music] leaves. I. must be corner stone. Oh, but when I [music] reach that. ground, I'll share this piece of mind I.

found. I can feel it in my bones, but it's going to take.