Trevor Bauer | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #481

I want to let you know that we have a. second show added in Atlanta Georgia. that's on April 5th that's right we also. have uh shows at Amherst and Brisbane in. the Australia all those are available. now theovon. docomo and only get tickets through. theo. comom if tickets are overpriced uh via a. second site or something don't buy them.

from scalpers just wait we'll come back. around sometime um yeah that's the best. way to do it and thank you guys for the. support and if we're not coming to your. city or country yet then just give it. time we will do our best and uh we love. you guys and thank you so much for the. support amen today's guest is a. professional pitcher for more than 10. years in Major League Baseball um he was. the winner of the golden spikes award in. college for the best collegiate baseball.

player of the year um he's won the Sai. Young he's been an Allstar uh he's. recently played in Japan because of some. interesting. circumstances um I'm really grateful to. learn about what the past few years of. his life have been like and to get to. know him today's guest is Mr Trevor. Bower. [Music]. me I'll sit and tell you my.

stories. shine on. me and I will find a song I. [Applause]. sing these are. sm7 sm7 yeah okay I know these. mics yeah you know a lot about this this. uh these stuff you know more than I do.

okay yeah I got into photography back in. 2017 started learning about it and then. started the media company momentum in. 2019 so I had to you know Buy cameras. and lenses and figure all the stuff out. so I learned about it your tripods are. in a lot nicer condition than ours we. put them in the cage where like. baseballs are flying so the legs are all. bent and broken oh. yeah um yeah thanks dude yeah I I could. probably learn from I could literally.

probably go watch uh one of your YouTube. videos and learn more about our own. equipment so maybe I should do that um. do you like to know everything about. stuff kind of like. like well I guess if you're starting. your own Media company if you because. you have your own YouTube channel yeah. yeah you like it it's good I enjoy it um. started it to try to entertain Baseball. fans um so that's what we try to do I. think we do a pretty good job we can do. better always trying to get better but. yeah it's fun that's what I enjoy doing. so yeah going to work every day and try.

to make some some sort of fun content to. entertain people yeah I saw some videos. on there you were having fun with some. of the Japanese players because yeah. yeah yeah they were uh it's it's kind of. interesting because they don't speak the. same language so the same the type of. you know banter back and forth that you. normally have you can't really have so. the banter becomes a little bit more. like body language and facial expression. so it was a challenge to like get that. but it's also fun you know it's like a.

new experience and like baseball is kind. of a universal language so they kind of. understood and I understood it was it. was a cool experience yeah it's fun when. you don't speak the same because even. you just have to make a look or do. something with your hands like everybody. everybody's like a mime all a sudden. yeah the uh the kind of subtle cues of. human behavior become more important the. the facial expressions the body language. the like you know pauses you know stuff. like that and the I love the moment when. you and another person who speak a.

different language realize neither one. of you knows how to say what you want to. say yeah so the side they just like yeah. you get to that moment you're like oh. okay uh just kind of maybe I should. thank you for your time try somewhere. else um and you were playing in Japan. right yeah yeah hajim M have you ever. heard that what is it haimi haimi how'. you mean. muste I'm sure I heard it I don't I. think it I think it means our friendship. begin can you look it up Nick if you get.

a chance I one time got to go to Japan I. was a student on the sinkhole semester. at C and so we you would go on a cruise. ship and um it was in college and you. would go to different countries around. the world that's cool um our friendship. begins. Watashi no yum. Y how you marim masu okay so a little. off little off right um but we got to go.

um and I worked like in the bookstore on. this cruise ship or this school is a. floating university called semester at. Sea that cool yeah it was pretty. exceptional and um we got to go on we. went to coob or Osaka yeah and then we. got to go on a home stay where you would. go and stay with a family for a couple. nights was that down in Osaka too yeah. okay Osaka's cool area is it yeah there. uh the beef there is incredible yeah. like uh it's just we played there a. couple different times throughout the. year and um there's a hotel that like.

all the npb teams stay at because they. serve like the dinner and stuff there is. like coob beef and like specialized to. aaka area it's so good it's so good and. uh yeah because that wagu beef that came. out of there right in Japan where's that. from bring it up Nick um yeah that wagu. beef and everybody's like wag they're. like three years ago people started. going crazy what is wagu beef a Japanese. beef. cattle derived from native Asian cattle.

wagu refers to all Japanese beef cattle. where why means Japanese and Goo means. cow wow wagu were originally draft. animals used in agriculture and were. selected for their physical endurance. wow so they pick some real gangster meat. you know it's the fatty it's the. intermuscular fat cells marbling so it's. uh you get that um really. rich texture God I want that you know.

it's delicious yeah maybe not be the. best thing for you for like an athlete. but it's uh taste-wise it's really hard. to beat and uh when you say npb what is. the teams in J in Japan called so. there's 12 teams um nione professional. baseball um that so npb just like major. league baseball um there's two leagues. there's Pacific League Central league. six teams in each um you got different. team names like the you know the bay. Stars Giants.

uh Tigers stuff like that so everyone. it's kind of similar to them it'll be. just smaller uh you know not as many. teams and how uh how was your team we. were good we made playoffs um. unfortunately we lost our first two game. of playoffs and got eliminated um but uh. no we had a good we had a good team a. lot of talented guys um a lot of funny. guys they they were super welcoming too. which was which was great um I mean the. organization as a whole making sure that.

foreign players have translators around. even down to like hey what kind of food. do you guys like um trying to have that. in the meal. spreads um just welcoming housing yeah. and Japan I mean if you've been there. you know like it's super clean the. people are super polite super nice like. it culturally it's very different than. the United States in a lot of different. ways and that was one of the things that. really stood out is like how nice the. people are oh yeah on the home stay that.

I went on so you you got to go stay with. a family for a couple nights yeah so I. show up over there uh I they speak. Japanese I'm I barely speak English. right and so we're just like dude it so. it's like real quiet and they made like. a little meal for me and uh we just sat. around this little table on the floor. and ate did you so did you have to sit. on the floor yeah I think they might. have put some Wick like a thin mat yeah. and we sat there and then um I guess. when I walked in I gave the lady just a. and a kiss just on the cheek just kind.

of how I am um and throughout the next. couple days she would have her friends. come over just so I would hug and kiss. him on the cheek she like Linda Linda. and and like the doorbell would ring in. and and she'd be like do it you know and. so I have to and she just kept having. friends come so I would give up I think. they just thought it was interesting and. then they let me sleep in their room I. think like and I think they slept in the. wall or something I swear they were like. they stood up and like in the wall all.

night and just didn't sleep CRA so I. could sleep like it's just a lot of um I. don't know if it's like sacrifice or. just extreme. respect I what do you feel like it is. you don't you don't trying to explain. respect deference um. they so they they what I've what I. learned and I I could be wrong about. this this is just what I've been told. and explained cuz obviously I didn't. grow up there and all that stuff but um. they care a lot about the good of like.

the group as opposed like over the good. of the individual yeah so if the. individual needs to sacrifice something. to make the group environment better the. individual is expected or or used to. offering to sacrifice so it makes sense. like if you have a guest in your house. and they could be more comfortable. sleeping on the bed and you can spend a. couple nights not sleeping on the bed I. can totally see how that would be how. that would be a thing yeah it was. baffling man I was just it was like I. felt so respected yeah it it was it was.

pretty fascinating I had a similar. experience I you know they were so. respectful that I was like no no I'm I'm. no better than you guys like I'm just. another like we can just be person to. person here and it's not that I'm like. above you or something I almost felt. like I was viewed as being above other. people and I don't like that I just like. I just like to like I'm not better than. you or anyone else I'm just another. normal person let's just like interact. on a fair playing field Level Playing. Field here yeah um I don't like being. like looked down on by people and I. don't like being put on a pedestal by.

people and I know they didn't do it. intentionally but it almost felt like. half the time the interactions I did. have with people even just you know fans. out in in the. community taxi drivers uh waitresses um. hosts stuff like that I almost felt like. I was on a pedestal and it was a little. uncomfortable for me yeah yeah but it's. cool like that. they there is that respect and there is. that like deference to the other person. um excited they're almost so excited to.

like respect you or to show you how. respectful they can be like that's a. good way putting it yeah um wow what a. what a what a uh interesting experience. just to get to go and and and be there. and like how was it overall it was great. um I've always wanted to do that um so I. had an experience in 2009. um played on Collegiate Team USA and we. had a five game series against the. Collegiate Japan team. and so we played over in Japan played at.

like five different stadiums we there. for I think 12 days they were packing. stadiums like 40,000 people for a. college baseball game now I'm coming. from West Coast baseball which doesn't. have the type of fan following as like. the SEC does we we draw like some nights. 50 people to a game some nights like. couple hundred people at UCLA and I'm. going to this Stadium this professional. Stadium the Tokyo Dome and there's. 40,000 people or something in the Tokyo. dome for a college baseball game it was. crazy and I remember in 2009 saying like.

I got to before my career's done I'm. going to play baseball in Japan I'm. going to experience this cuz the fan. culture is so crazy there it's like. European soccer there's like packed and. chanting in the passion everything like. that wow look at these images for a. baseball game bands playing nonstop like. and that was college ball that was. college ball it was you know the. Japanese style they had a band for the. Japanese team but they also provided a. band for the American team so we had a. band playing for us even though we were.

the visiting team which is the most. Japanese thing ever it was it was. awesome um so yeah I've always wanted to. do it I you know was happy to have the. opportunity to do that um the travel is. different the the baseball even like the. technical little details of the game. like the way it's played what's. emphasized is different fan culture like. it's it was such a great experience um. the food I'm a huge Sushi fan so like. the first time I went 2009 I didn't have.

sushi and it was cuz I didn't have a. translator with me and I didn't know. what I was ordering and I had heard back. then that if there's certain types of. fish that if you eat it and it's not cut. right you can die like puffer fish or. something oh yeah I heard that rumor. going around too people were saying that. in our neighborhood and I'm like. dude none of us are going to eat any. puffer fish we can't you know what I'm. saying but I couldn't tell what it was. on the menu cuz I didn't read you know. Google translate didn't exist back then. in 2009 so I didn't have sushi and that. was one of my regrets so I ate a lot of. sushi this past year to make up for it. yeah yeah dude I remember people like.

bro can't have any puffer fish man if it. ain't cut right you could die I'm like. dude we could we're we're lucky. to split a Jimmy John tomorrow like. let's be real like nobody's bringing. puffer fish into our neighborhood dude. like some people are just obtuse man um. so I want to know like how you kind of. started in baseball cuz like like I. think everybody kind of like there's. this like Ambiance in the universe like. there's a lot of information in the. world about how you ended up up like. having to go to Japan or one of the you.

know like the some of the overall. reasons because you weren't allowed back. in Major League Baseball yeah but how. did you like get into baseball like like. when you were like who brought it to you. first like what brought it what brought. baseball to you I. think like my earliest memory of. baseball is I had this little plastic. bat called fatbat it was maybe a foot. and a half long had a you know big old. barrel of plastic bat whiffle ball bat. and I remember being out in the front. yard at my house and my dad would toss.

me a whiffle ball and I would you know I. would hit the ball and run around the. yard and um we had this little like uh. brick wall that was maybe like you know. one cinder block or two cinder blocks. high so I'd always try to hit the ball. over that for a home run so I must have. been two years old or something at that. point um I think I was always just drawn. to it I always wanted. to yeah like when I was growing up what. I wanted to go do was play baseball. practice baseball I was always out in.

the front yard playing pickle or three. flies you're up with some of the. neighborhood kids you know some people. go out and play basketball or football. or whatever like we played baseball on. my block so and where was that at where. were you guys living I was up in. Valencia uh yeah in California um what's. it like there what's Valencia like dude. there's tumble weeds when we moved out. there like open plots and um now it's. all malls and shopping centers and stuff. like that but really nice Community lots. of trees but like planned like. neighborhoods and stuff. so we actually lived uh maybe like a 5.

minute bike ride from uh one of the. public parks up there so when I was. growing up I just ride my bike with a. bucket of baseballs up to the park Safe. Community everyone you you just run. around it was a different world back. then I'm 33 now so I'm talking you know. 30 years ago I'd be up and down the poos. and out all day and um yeah I I love. Valencia um parents still live there I. still go back all the time oh nice man. yeah so you get out there and ball you. so and that was just a sport that you.

kind of took to yeah I played soccer um. I guess or football depending on where. you are in the world um but uh played. that until High School um but when I got. to high school I was in like AP classes. and playing baseball and I didn't have. time for soccer and I was always just. much more drawn to baseball anyway so. yeah never really played any other. sports just been baseball pretty much my. whole life did you collect the cards too. uh I collected baseballs and autographs. more than cards so my dad and I would go. to Spring training every year we'd make. the drive it's like six hours from LA to.

to Arizona for oh for the Diamondbacks. uh Diamond there's a bunch of people out. there Diamondbacks um I mean I I. remember when they just put the Royals. and the Rangers facility out there and. they started moving in but the Oakland. A's Cubs have been out there forever. Brewers like a whole bunch of teams I. think there's 15 or 16 teams out in. spring training in Arizona now here we. go right here you have white socks a. Giants wow some great teams um did you. ever get to see Mark Grace out there um. no I don't remember if I saw Mark Grace.

but u i remember when Ichiro came over I. guess kind of drawing the Japanese. connection but I remember when like icho. first came to the Mariners and we're. like oh there's this like new guy from. Japan that's supposed to be really good. and this just kind of sensation and then. uh I remember standing there with a ball. outside of the fence at spring training. like ich icho trying to get a an. autograph um and then he went on to be. like just the best hitter that's ever. lived or something you know we had no. idea that he was going to be that. successful but I remember being a little.

kid and just standing there at spring. training watching the guys did he sign. the ball I don't think I think he was um. I think he was off to another field or. something I don't remember we had to. know we had to know that's why I yeah um. yeah so that was your world and so you. and then you just became good at it like. like did you love did you just love. practicing it so much like how did it. yeah I love practicing I love I just. like doing anything baseball related so. I was always thinking about it I was. always out playing it so I think I. developed some skills that way and I was.

always like goodish but I was never the. best guy I never made like the best. tournament team or the best All-Star. team oh wow even in my freshman year of. high school I was like not the the ace. pitcher um but I also love like math and. physics and I took a class in ninth. grade with a guy Martin Kirby was in a. physics class new Kirby Martin Kirby's a. British guy okay so he had this accent. and like he made class really really fun. Kirby. yeah yeah the Brits dude you just.

believe them you know you know. they go home and drink but still he had. a he had a picture um so he used to be a. smoker actually and he quit cold turkey. one day but he put two packs of. cigarettes in his mouth lit them all at. the same time so he had that picture on. the wall like just him with two packs of. cigarettes in his mouth and he said he. like got so sick after that that he just. never wanted to smoke again damn but. yeah he's a he's it was such a fun class. and I started learning about like. physics and how leverage works and.

velocity and energy transfer and. momentum and all that and I started. trying to take class and apply it to. baseball and at the same time I went. down to a training facility in Texas. actually for the first time it's a Texas. baseball Ranch and uh they were talking. about some of the same Concepts momentum. and um energy transfer and whip and all. this different stuff and so I that was. really when I started my like my true. devoted like baseball development where. I was trying to take academic. and apply it to baseball and use a.

scientific method to like get myself. better oh damn so you brought some real. homeschool energy today deal man I mean. that's but so so that was something that. like that took a once that got added in. like this other kind of world of it that. you could start to see while you were. doing it and stuff and equate yeah then. you really I really kind of lit you up. that's when it took that's how my brain. works too cuz I like I need to have. something that I'm chasing some like I'm. here I want to go there I need to plot a. course and like am I getting closer to.

my target or not like that's how my. brain works so as soon as I had like I. knew I always wanted to play in college. that was my goal I never well my goal. growing up was just to play on the high. school team then once I made my freshman. team I was like okay I want to play in. college and that was really when my. development was starting so I was like. okay I want to get to College I'm. currently a freshman in high school I'm. throw this hard I have this pitch I have. this command whatever like I need to. improve these skill sets and so then I. would wake up in the morning at like. 5:30 three times a week and go to the.

YMCA and do like pool workouts I love YC. don't you yeah yeah we had a membership. there I used to lift there and spent a. lot of time there as a kid I always love. it it just makes me feel like just part. of the universe yeah yeah um I sorry I. interrupted you so you would go there. and you would uh you would just train. practice get ready I'd do that yeah. prior to school then I'd go do school go. straight to practice after school we'd. get done at 4:30 5:00 go home do some. homework and eat and then usually like 7. or 8:00 I'd go up to local park and I'd. be there for an extra 3 hours doing.

whatever workout I was doing or throwing. or videoing myself or whatever you know. trying to trying to find some way to get. better and that's just what I I didn't. really like do anything else I didn't. have interest in anything else did you. give a lot of friends like did you have. a social world or you just really did. you and was that kind of a choice you. think you made or you just kind of get. locked in on something and and you. because a lot of people that become. great at something there's there's. sacrifices to it people don't realize. that yeah um I think uh it was partially.

that what I wanted to do was baseball so. given the choice of going to the mall to. hang out on a Friday afternoon or going. and doing baseball like I was naturally. gravitated towards baseball also. like. I I'm not really the most like social. person like a lot of my social. interactions I learned a little later in. life starting in college and pro ball. and stuff I just didn't I I viewed. things differently as a kid I was kind. of different I dressed differently I. thought about different stuff my sense. of humor was different than the normal.

kids so I struggled I struggled socially. um in high school all you know Junior. High all the way up into high school I. didn't have a a large peer group um you. know I was kind of I was part of two. different groups I was like part of the. athlete group right but I didn't fit in. with them because I was also a nerd oh. yeah and I didn't really fit in with the. Nerds because I was a jock and so I kind. of got pickled between both of those. where I didn't really have a group that. I fit in with like Clark K almost in a. way you know I mean not not quite as uh. as super but yeah but well you would.

turn out to be oh here you are right. there go Trevor in this throwback to. when the Astros didn't have to cheat to. win that's it that's tweet oh that's. cool dude does that does that kid look. like uh someone that would fit in so. that's actually a uniform like I would. wear my baseball like pants and uniform. and stuff to school in school so I got I. got picked on a lot yeah but also dude. if you slid in the fourth period you. were a Legend I'll tell you that. you know if the only person that slides. head first in the social studies you.

win as far as I'm concerned. today's episode is brought to you by. prize picks if you like firing on Sports. then prize picks is the app for you. instead of choosing teams you choose. individual players that's what I like. about it it's Unique each player has a. set projection and you either choose. more or less than that set projection. for example Le you could choose Isaiah.

Pacho more than 51 yards or Brock perie. more than two touchdowns that's right. prize picks is America's number one. fantasy sports app and my favorite place. to fire on Sports if you're smart with. sports and know what players are going. to perform on what nights then prize. picks is the best app for you download. the app and use code Theo. prize picks will match your deposit up.

to. $100 keeps baby you want to keep your. hair don't you yeah you do even animals. want to keep their hair everybody wants. it and if you're a husband or just a man. or even a woman you might want to keep. your hair and I don't blame you I like. keep in mine that's for sure get expert. care for hair loss from the comfort of. your home without ever visiting a. doctor's office or Pharmacy keeps helped. me they can help you all treatment plans.

are personalized to address your unique. needs and recommended by a licensed. medical provider that's true keeps. offers both of the FDA approved hair. loss treatment options as well as a. 2inone gel that combines both treatments. to date keeps has helped nearly 1. million men keep their hair hair loss. stops with keeps for a special offer to. get started go to keeps. . Theo or click the link in the.

description that's ke ps.com. EO um wow so you just loved it that much. it kind of became almost or it seems. like I'm just being judgmental but um. like it became like a sense of Pride. that you had then yeah or like you ident. you really identified as like I think it. was my back stop like anything anytime. something would happen in life if it was. you know I was picked on or bullied or. whatever in school like I go to the park. and I would do baseball you know if.

something was going good in my life I. was like okay like I'm excited like I'm. going to go do baseball I bonded with my. family over you know on the weekends. growing up we'd have tournaments all the. time so you'd travel on Friday evening. or Saturday morning two or three hours. away you'd play four or five games in a. couple days I was out there with my mom. and my dad my sister my you know whoever. was going sometimes most most of the. time it was my dad sometimes my mom. sister would come along so I have really. good family relationships because of. baseball I have like. baseball's always kind of been my coping. mechanism when something's going wrong I.

just go do baseball because that's what. I know and like I'm good at it and I. feel a sense of uh like accomplishment. or progress towards a goal or something. like that and it's fluid to you it. becomes part of your makeup and so you. I'm going to go get back to a good. homeostasis no matter what's going on. highs or lows yeah I think I exercise. helps tends to help with that in general. so because baseball is an active thing. um I think I got kind of the benefits of. both the exercise but also that like. centering of myself um a lot of people.

have like video games that they go play. or they go watch a Netflix show or. something like that not saying those. things are wrong but I also think that. baseball some it's because it was. something active I got the physiological. benefits of exercising too which I think. helps stabilize yeah and why the. pitching was the pitching because you. have a lot you have some cool pitches. man uh I stayed up last night I mean. actually really late and then I couldn't. sleep I'm like eight days off nicotine. right now soow I didn't know it was. going to fect bro it like will not let.

me sleep are you on like you doing like. patches or what's the I'm on nothing. dude straight up I'm on just light. prayer and just doing my best yeah yeah. you know and it's like but I didn't I. thought it was like three days it's out. of your system dude it is like haunting. at night until you're awake and you're. like what should I do and then your. brain's like maybe you should do some. VAP like what the it like won't let you. it's gone but it won't let you sleep and. then it just starts to be like what. about maybe a puff or two you know you.

think that's a you think that's like a. physiological thing or do you think it's. a mental thing like your mind wants it. or you think your body's craving it man. it's a good question um some of it is a. little bit of a bore it's a it habitual. like it become a. boredom thing I I don't have anything I. can't do anything else right now I might. as well do this so maybe a little bit. habitual uh and I think my mind yeah my. mind is like oh I'm frustrated I want to. be sleeping I can't what can I do uh in.

frustration cuz a lot of times I if. things were going good or bad Vape. became like a little bit of a habit I. would use interesting um it's. interesting to think about though yeah. because sometimes people just do things. they don't even start to think about why. am I doing it you know like what inside. of me is like beckoning me to this I'll. find myself walking down the. street nothing happens I like think that. my phone vibrated so I reach in my. pocket and check in I'm like oh no no no. ification put it back in my pocket no.

more than 30 seconds later I'm like oh. someone just text me but like it's not. vibrating there's nothing there and it's. just I'm so used to reaching for my. phone because of text call social media. notification like whatever you get. programmed over the years to to reach. for your phone so much yeah um so I I. have the same type of experience with. the habitual side of things yeah I think. a lot yeah I've had some I made some. poor I mean I had like pornography I got. into pretty badly when I was like in my. 20s and that was was a uh that was a bad.

habit um vaping has been the tougher one. as I have gotten older but I don't drink. or do drugs so it's like sometimes I. give myself a little bit of a leeway. yeah but I just like my own energy. better I'm able to sit and have a more. comfortable conversation with people and. so at a certain point it's like I have. to give it up just because I'm missing. out on I'll be short with people you. know I won't want to stay in a moment. because I want to go Vape you know just. like that you you self-reflect a. lot on things do you look at your own. like behaviors and stuff and like.

analyze yourself or like how do you get. that feedback yeah I started doing that. more yeah you know I've done like some. IAS over the few years and I bring that. up a lot but that plant medicine that. stuff is really interesting for exactly. that it helps me learn um it's not as. much time that I spend learning. something like say I'll read or write. something or or or be in a class but. it's the time I go sit back with what. I've written yeah and be and and have um. a relation have like a integration. that's what I'm learning is so much more.

crucial it's like cuz for so long I was. like kind of learning and getting some. getting information but a lot of things. weren't sticking because the big part I. was missing out on was integration. interesting you know and so I think. that's where some of that comes from and. um being in conversations with getting. be in conversations with some neat. people over the years and makes me start. to think more yeah um and leads me into. like wanting to be more introspective. and and wonder why I do things you know. um I have a brother that helps me think. about that kind of stuff a lot and make.

me kind of question you know so I start. to not only be myself but also uh see. myself a little bit that makes any sense. yeah no for sure the the studies on the. iasa and the uh mushrooms and stuff like. that for brain function like uh treating. ptsds and you know past experiences and. stuff like that is pretty interesting. I'm like I follow it decently closely. just because I'm very interested in the. effects of of like the brain and how you. how do you learn something how do you. get over something how do you change.

behaviors stuff like that so yeah it's. uh the last couple years there's been a. lot of cool stuff that's come out about. that stuff that was like 10 years ago. kind of demonized and looked at like. this really bad thing now we're starting. to learn a little bit more like oh this. could be useful in like these certain. areas yeah there's like Shades of Gray. in there right it's not just like it's. good or it's bad it's like could be a. useful tool in certain cases it could be. abused in certain cases um yeah yeah. it's interesting yeah I love that I love. that it's that kind of stuffs becoming.

like a new modality or whatever whatever. term people use for people to try and. get well you know yeah because it almost. goes really back to Our Roots like. literally back to like it's like Native. American root medicine yeah that they. would use to like really have a better. look at themselves kind of um but I I I. recommend it I think it helps it's. helped me a lot in just having different. ways to think about things yeah um when. did you start being good at B like when. did it start to add up cuz if you're. doing all those unique pitches like some. of the P like you just have such a cool.

like assortment of pitches I almost feel. like yeah somebody's rolling up to the. mound this is from your channel right. here yeah oh this is back in uh 11 years. ago yeah W you've had your channel for a. long time yeah I started I think. 2011 um to do like you know try to. connect with Baseball fans and like give. some information and then I actually. stopped it for like six or seven years. there from 2013 through maybe 2019 or. 2020 I should have kept it going I'd.

have a lot more subscribers you got a. great amount of subscribers D 690,000 is. amazing yeah um and did what made you. stop what was the break was you were you. getting busy with baseball no so I. actually got in trouble uh so I when I. was growing up I in high school and. college I watched a guy named Tim linum. and I like studied everything about him. wait did he play for the Giants yeah. yeah and I his college film his Giants. film minor league film like I can still. close my eyes and picture.

like the exact delivery from a time from. a video from University of Washington he. was throwing it was like 40 degrees that. night half long sleeve per like I can. see the video in my head um but I. studied him Non-Stop and one of my most. fun things to do in college was every. time he pitched I would go on mlb.com. and I would see the highlights and I. would just watch them over and over and. over and i' got a lot of enjoyment out. of it so I started putting a segment up. on my channel when I signed I was in the. minor leagues there was no way for fans.

to watch me pitch in the minor leagues. and have that same experience of. highlights so I would take video clips. from the games make a little highlight. reel I called it weekly whiffs and I. would put it up on YouTube channel and I. did two episodes of it and then the. organization at the time that I was with. at the time was like hey you can't do. that because it was just different no. one was doing that it was right you know. it can be looked at as like you're. trying to embarrass the other hitters or. whatever it had nothing to do with the. hitters I was just trying to entertain. the fans yeah um and so I made a couple.

more videos after that like the pitch. grips video in 2013 and a couple slow. motion videos here there but um it kind. of in a way it took a little bit of the. fun of like trying to entertain fans out. uh and so I just I was off of it I went. more towards uh Twitter at the time. which is now X but um trying to just. have that like back and forth connection. with fans and grow it that way um and. that ended up getting me in a lot of. trouble as well unfortunately people. don't like you to have your own voice a. lot of times yeah you know which is we.

you know if you're involved in something. that's biger like when you have to go. into organizations like major league. sports college sports where there's a. lot of big business interests on the. back end of things they really don't. like a lot of guys to have their own. voices it seems like they don't you're. not really you're allowed to but are you. really allowed to yeah it's a it's an. interesting my perspective on that has. has changed a good amount recently like. so coming up I was like like okay I'm my. own person I'm going to have my voice.

like you as my employeer don't control. me I'm going to say what I want whatever. and that was very kind of bullheaded on. that and then I started a business and I. have employees and I deal with employees. who remind me very much of myself and. they have their own voice and they. express stuff in certain ways and I'm. like okay like I got to handle this a. little bit differently as a business. owner than I with as employee and now I. can understand the different perspective. like I'm still very like I'm very. protective of trying to tell my. employees you can't say this or you can.

say this or like putting guidelines on. it but I do see how someone like me. coming up that has these opinions. especially when I would be like critical. of the league like here's an employee of. the league who's being critical of their. boss publicly and like at the time I was. like well this isn't right and this. isn't right and I disagree with this and. blah blah blah and so I would just say. it and then without considering the. opposite perspective and I think I was a. lot more like I canident identify this. problem and I'm just going to say that. there's a problem and blame instead of.

now what I really try to do is look and. say okay I identify a problem but what. are some potential Solutions let me. present the solutions that I think and. have a discussion about it instead of. just like hey you're wrong you're wrong. do this this way and whatever so some of. that like Evolution over time growing up. and getting older and learning from past. mistakes starting a business seeing. other perspectives um in your business. you're talking about your YouTube. channel your Trevor bow Channel yeah. it's a cool Channel man yeah we have. Trevor Boward Channel we have also. momentum uh Channel and ER and Eric Sims.

Channel we all we're kind of like a. Content group um so M momentum is the. company and it's started in 2019 to grow. baseball entertain Baseball fans and so. we bring people in um D wow you have a. lot of sub subscri Subs the kids call. them you got a lot of Subs on there man. yeah Eric just passed I think he's at. like 520 now as well so I'm at 690. momentum's at 6 or 567 Eric's over 500. as as well we got a couple other. creators that come in the idea is.

basically you bring guys in that love. baseball that have a good personality. you have a group Channel where they can. get exposure to a lot of people. entertain a lot of people and then they. end up growing their brands and can go. in their own different directions you. have someone that does gaming you have. someone that does Action you have. someone that does you know card reviews. you have someone that does whatever and. so you start branching out and. entertaining all factions of Baseball. fans and growing the game organically. where the audience is you know one of. the things that I think NBA was probably. the first sport to really adopt it is. the social media push like delivering.

content to fans where the fans are M um. I mean you go on NBA or you go on. Twitter X or whatever social media. platform when the playoffs are going on. in NBA it's like the second Steph Curry. hits a three like it's everywhere yeah. right you have the same opportunities in. baseball where was like hard to find. content and so I was like okay this is a. problem but instead of just like blaming. I'm gonna like try to actually do. something about the problem so momentum. is kind of my attempt to like help.

impact the marketability of players help. impact the growth of the game you know. young people aren't playing baseball. nearly as much anymore there's so many. other opportunities um you got streaming. services so they can watch on their iPad. you got gaming that's huge Esports um. people aren't outside as much playing so. the game is like shrinking a little bit. at the Youth Level so trying to trying. to grow it in in ways where kids will. consume the content get interested in it. yeah man dude that's so Kudos bro just.

to be a be be a part be doing something. uh your job but then also create wanting. to create this other more of your job. kind of you know like um this is's not a. lot of guys that have that have their. own channels like that yeah baseball's. given me a lot oh yeah this chart's uh. this chart's sad this is Sheriff. children aged 6 to 12 who participate in. baseball on a regular basis in the. United States from 2008 to 2020. yeah and in 2008 it says 16.5% and now.

we're down to 12.6% yeah it's down like. 25% in the last 15 years I'm kind of. shocked because I know we have a like a. larger growing Latino culture you know. and I know baseball's big in Latino. cultures you know why do you think that. is why do you think there's been like a. tail off like that well I think. uh basball has gotten. expensive um the equipment's very. expensive the travel team very. expensive um also baseball isn't doesn't.

have the cool factor that NBA has NBA. has sneakers and and like rap culture. pop culture they've Blended the two. together in a very cool way that's a. good point and so when you're going. through high school and you're trying to. figure out who you are like you want the. you want to be part of the cool crowd. and it's the sneakers it's the the new. rapper the new album It's the entertain. it's and that's synonymous with NBA yeah.

uh baseball hasn't had the same like uh. success in blending and getting the cool. factor for young kids yeah baseball. always was like the it was the kids. would go off and do it in high school. but you didn't really know you didn't. and a lot of times you. wouldn't it wouldn't be a part of the. pep rallies a lot of times and stuff so. yeah there was always missing a little. bit of that football you have the. crossover you have like the cheerleaders. and you have the football players and. these are you know there's like. integration of like the whole school. right and it's one game and the school. shows up and it's our school versus your.

school and so there's a lot of. involvement around football NBA has the. pop culture. integration baseball's struggled to get. that their thing. um and you. know it's uh there's a lot of games so. it's not like if you miss out on this. game there's not going to be a game. tomorrow right so good point uh and it's. always been that baseball has like an. older demographic it's a slower game I. think his attention spans are shrinking.

Tik toks around Shorts YouTube shorts. Instagram reels all this stuff attention. is. shrinking the Cadence of baseball is. slow right um where NBA it's like 20. seconds and then there's a new play and. then this and then that football it's. like there's always something going on. baseball it's like well there's you know. four minutes in between Innings and then. there's 30 seconds in between a pitch. like one of the things they tried this. year is like a pitch clock so shrink the. time in between pitches which has. seemingly made the game more popular.

yeah I feel that I felt that energy when. I went to some games this year it felt. faster it felt a little bit more and it. kept you a little bit involved because. it was just enough time where you didn't. kind of zone out and go get on your. phone of that extra five or six seconds. yeah like even when we're saying that. extra habitual moment where you kind of. start to check out I would stay involved. you know we went to see Zach gallon. pitch a couple times which was really. cool um who else did we go oh going to a. Padre's game is so much fun man that. Park is so much fun you go in San Diego. yeah yeah dude that Park is so much fun.

they do a good job down there um when so. padr and Dodgers were oh yeah a lot of. lot of rivalry going back there Dodgers. players won't say it's rivalry but it's. a rivalry right um and so we' you know I. in 2021 I was with the Dodgers we'd go. down play in Padres and it was like so. loud and so cool the Stadium's like. pretty compact you you got the you got. the industrial building out there that. kind of squeezes things together and. they pack it full it's really energetic.

and uh yeah we played some really fun. games down there is such a fun place to. uh to be a part of it's cool it's right. downtown the backdrops really cool. you're right by the ocean the weather's. always great like you literally you. leave the stadium and you're there's. bars right there just right downtown the. best area they got some great players. down there too man um no no Joe is one. of my buddies who pitches over there. he's he's he's awesome um yeah but uh.

you darish. Machado uh tatis yeah they're just it's. fun that's that's a fun place to see a. game um so how did so when did you start. to like when did you like be like okay. I've got the mechanics uh I've been. working on this so much myself I have my. own interest in it when did you start to. be like good and what was that like so I. was I was good my freshman year I was. good my sophomore year in high school. cool I made I made varsity team towards. the end of my sophomore year but then I.

really like I really exploded my junior. year of um of high school my velocity. jumped a lot I was throwing in the 90s I. struck a lot of people out I had like a. sub one ER for the year started getting. a lot of uh yeah I think it was like 79. ra or something I don't remember the. exact number but um gosh yeah struck out. like uh 106 people I think in 72 Innings. or something along those lines so I had. a really good year I went 12-0 that year. our team was really good um actually the.

there's a senior pitcher I was a junior. Mike Montgomery was a senior um he was. getting a lot of looks he ended up. getting drafted in the first round by. the Royals that year so we had a lot of. scouts out at our games wow so you had a. lot of influence to see that this could. really happen right I mean he's right. there ahead of you and this happens in. front of you so baseball is such a small. world too that like in the 2016 World. Series the last person to throw a pitch. for the Cubs Michael Montgomery the last. person to throw a pitch for the Indians. me wow high school teammates we're the. last ones to throw pitches in that for.

our respective teams in that World. Series but uh yeah and so he was good. and I don't like losing to people on my. own team I don't like losing period like. I'm a super intense competitor so like. he would go have a start and I'm like. okay I gotta be better than that and. then that really drove me to be better. and so actually I ended up graduating. high school half a year early and so I I. never played my senior season in high. school I just went to. UCLA to go went start yeah so I. graduated December I think 18th and I.

started UCLA January 4th and then I. played what would have been my senior. season of high school as my freshman. year in college you must been one of the. younger pitchers that year yeah younger. P one of the younger pitchers I was. actually the Freshman pitcher of the. year in all of NCAA that year and that's. after that year is when I made Team USA. and went played in Japan in 2009 as. basically a high school senior so so. what happens in that space cuz like um. and pitching is so perfect for you it. sounds like cuz it's your own little war. that you're in you're like this this.

Orchestra you're the you're this guy but. you're also the guy playing the you know. it's like um it's you versus them it's. very clearcut how things go um what uh. oh dang I had a great question um it. probably wasn't that great but I thought. it was pretty decent um this is my brain. checks out every now and then but hold. on I'm stay with this what uh what about. did your ego did Ego start to build up. cuz that's one thing I always talk about. a lot in here just like our ego and what. that's like you know cuz what was it.

like when you start to get like a claim. for that if you're kind of have this. social uncomfortability yeah I um I've. always tried to separate ego on and off. the field um I haven't been great at it. but I think having an ego on the field. is super important like when you walk. out there you got to know that you're. the best you have to believe that you're. better than him and him and him. and you got to feel like you're the best. guy out there to be like the true like.

competitor you know off the field like. going around telling everybody that. you're better than them and acting like. that's not great right so uh I'm not. naturally like inclined to be. egotistical I because the way I view. things it's never like a static Point. everything is I'm improving or I'm. getting worse it's a it's a fluid. situation and so if I'm either getting. better or getting worse I'm on a a. journey just like you're on a journey. you have your struggles and your your. successes I have my struggles and.

successes I view myself as like even. with every other person but on the field. like when it's competition time like I. am the best person on the field and if. I'm not that day it's. because like I didn't work hard enough. or I need a better process but like. every time I step on the field I have to. believe that I'm the best person there. and I've had times in my career where I. lost that belief and it was there those.

were very dark times performance wise I. was terrible on the field and I had to. like trick myself and like fake like. fake it in my own mind that I was still. good and then when I started doing that. the results came back but wow um yeah. it's interesting at levels of success. how you have to sometimes trick yourself. to stay there how you have to use little. manipulations life hacks all those.

there's so many different things that so. many different people who are top. performers in their in their world or. sport or whatever it is line of work uh. do I think I'm a little predisposed to. uh depression for whatever reason I. don't know if it's something chemical or. or what it is I'm a very like kind of. flat personality I don't have like a ton. of highs and lows so when baseball would. go bad like my mood would go. really bad and I had to find a way to. kind of pull those two things apart and.

be regardless of baseball is up or down. I needed to be able to like be okay in. my life um and what you do to go did you. like would you like if when things got. bad how would you would you booze a. little like how would your world know so. I've never I've never been drunk I've. never done drugs. um wow bro you are you are riding the. world like yeah that's in that's. int it's incredible man it's I didn't.

have friends to invite me to the parties. in high. school I never got started but um yeah I. would like when I would have it early in. my career let's say prior to uh let's. say July. 2017 um I would have a bad outing and I. would go home and I would study it for. hours and hours and I would be up till. 4: or 5 in the morning and then I. wouldn't sleep well and then I'd be Mis. the next day cuz I'm like okay I should. have done all these things that I didn't. do and now my results are bad and we.

lost the game and I'm this and that and. whatever um and then I was just 20 the. the start of 2017 was like the worst. half of baseball that I've had and I had. like a seven or eight erra gosh that's a. lot I could have that probably no I mean. it probably couldn't any anyone any. number of people yeah some people could. let's just say some people could have it. yeah and uh sorry man that was kind of. offensive but no no I mean it's true. it's just a fact I was bad and I had to.

trick myself into believing that I was. good wow because I'm so analytical that. I was like I am the worst pitcher in. Major League Baseball right now. factually and I had to pull myself out. of that and somehow trick myself on the. field to thinking that I was good and. then I also had to pull myself a split. myself from baseball so I could find a. way to be okay personally in. life and um so I had to start developing. some other interests some stuff that. when I went home I would get interested.

in that thing instead of studying. baseball so much and then from 2017 on. outside of two months at the end of 2019. I was probably like a top 10 pitcher in. baseball and but that that split of like. being okay personally and finding a way. to kind of like level out that. depression and um some of those you know. really down moments um made me better. and more stable at doing my job on the. field as well and would you go spend. time with the guys after the games or. would you still kind of Do Your Own.

Thing a lot so baseball is uh because. night because games are played at night. like when you get out of the field it's. 11:15 11:30 yeah so if you're going to. go spend time with the guys it's like. what bar are you going to what club are. you going to there's not a whole lot of. other options on the road sometimes you. go back to the hotel room go play cards. have a glass of wine or something in. someone's room and hang out with the. guys um but it's not like you're just. going to dinner at 7:00 and having a. nice night so um I would typically just. go from the field back home most of the.

time you do you spend with guys during. season is like prior to the game so you. get there at noon or 1 play cards in the. Clubhouse play some video games joke. around whatever or Day games when you. get done at 4: and you can go to dinner. those are usually like Sundays if you're. not traveling um do you find yourself in. Social atmospheres do you feel pretty. uncomfortable like how do you how do you. feel like in Social atmospheres do you. feel pretty has it changed over time. yeah it's uh it's definitely changed I'm. very very uncomfortable around large. groups of people that I don't know um. I'm not very good at like starting a.

conversation um you know I just I think. too much and so when I look at another. person I'm like well they don't want to. talk to me and like what am I going to. say and well how do I not come off I. don't want to come off awkward and. disturb him but I also like kind of want. to talk to him but I and I just I just. don't do I just think too much where I. watch some guys they just like go up hey. how's it going and they like have a. great conversation I'm like damn yeah. and then they're married to him you're. like God that. guy doing great man that's awesome yeah.

dude sometimes I would always Marvel at. people that just had that disposition to. be able to be comfortable yeah man I. remember there's a WWE wrestler The Miz. is his name and um he was just he was. always so comfortable wherever he was. and it was the I I never saw anybody. like it the guy just and he just it was. just effortless you know and that was. one thing I was always so envious of. certain people that had they didn't have.

to fight inside of themselves to be. comfortable and you know and that that. was always like something I really uh I. just noticed a lot yeah I'm comfortable. with myself right but I'm not. comfortable like going into like unknown. groups and like just somehow integrating. myself now if I know a couple people and. were out like I'm fine like meeting one. of their friends and having a. conversation like talk to someone all. night but I'm not the one that's like I.

don't know how to go start those. conversations you might have a freaking. hit of the tism I got it you know what. I'm saying no judgment dude some of the. greatest like people of our time now. have I think a low-key dose you know you. know 7even eight% I think I wouldn't I. wouldn't be surprised yeah it's awesome. man yeah I mean Elon Musk definitely is. riding you know he's riding some Bezos. has it for sure um a lot of the greats. have it some people think that Mike. Tomlin is that his name the football.

coach right yeah he you know you don't. see a lot of dark tism going on but I. bet he's got a dose um but yeah I think. there's a lot of it out there it's. creeping up on all of us but I think. it's helping in some ways it's because I. think we some of us are having to evolve. we've gotten into such a uh digital and. like a world that is uh that if you have. are able to conceptual I. things almost a little more. electronically sometimes it's a light.

word I'm using but that you have more. success because we're just becoming more. like hypothetically like robots as. people so it just kind of makes sense. make any sense to you yeah yeah for sure. I mean prior to social media if you're. going to get information you're going to. read a book you're going to ask people. around you're going to be in the. community and like learn from people. around you so your habits of uh. ingesting information were reliant on. being able to have those interactions. you're outside more there was less to do.

on your phone personally like less. connection digitally there was no. connection digitally for a long time. yeah your grandpa was like shitty Google. remember you go to your grandpa yeah. remember thesaurus yeah yeah dud got to. go look up into thesaurus now you just. chat GPT or Google it or whatever yeah. you can now you can just you don't even. have to you can like go to my fake. family.com and just pick out a family on. there and they'll send you a picture of. you in a family and you frame it and put. you're like who the are these.

people just yeah it's a different. universe but it's kind of fascinating if. we don't look at it that kind of stuff. as a negative I think sometimes we look. at it as we're part of evolution you. know in a way so sometimes that's kind. of interesting to me this episode is. sponsored by better help you know if. you're struggling with something if. something there's a specific thing maybe. you can't handle it anymore or maybe. it's just a general feeling of. depression or. uncertainty some of that's normal but.

some of it isn't and if you feel like. you need help then better help is a. great place to try that's for sure I've. used better help it's entirely online. designed to be convenient flexible and. suited to your schedule just fill out a. brief questionnaire to get matched with. the license therapist and switch. therapists anytime for no additional. charge become your own soulmate whether. you're looking for one or not visit. betterhelp.com theot today to get 10%.

off your first month that's better. HP. help.com Theo betterhelp. hp.com Theo you know that little guy. with the uh hat and glasses when you. open up incognito mode for a little late. night research well that guy is seen. some things hasn't he good thing to know. he can keep a secret uh nah he can't he.

doesn't even with Mr incognito on duty. every single thing you've ever clicked. on is fully visible to anyone who owns. your Wi-Fi who's that you ask uh I don't. know your work your school's it. Department your parents sounds like you. need. expressvpn that's what we're using. expressvpn is an app that sends 100% of. your traffic through their encrypted. servers so your eclectic taste in cinema.

cannot be seen by anyone it's like a. super incognito mode that actually works. I love expressvpn so much I even got. them to give you an incredible deal if. you use my special link. expressvpn.com. Theo you'll get three extra mons. completely free that's ex P SS VP vn.com. Theo to help support the podcast and get. three extra months of expressvpn.

absolutely free this episode is. sponsored by Blue chew Let's Talk About. Sex yeah fellas remember the days when. you were already ready to get going and. you were just ready to do some sex but. maybe something's changed who knows well. now you can increase your performance. and get that extra confidence in bed. bluechew.com that's right bluechew is a.

unique online service that delivers the. same active ingredients as Viagra Calis. and Levitra but in chewable tablets and. at a fraction of the cost that's right. blue choose tablets are made in the USA. and prepared and Shi direct to your door. in a discrete package chew your way to. that freaking wonderful Wier bab you can. do it we got a special deal for our. listeners try blue free when use our.

promo code Theo at checkout just pay $5. shipping that's. bluechew.com promo code Theo to receive. your first month free visit. blue.com for more details and important. safety information and we thank blueo. for sponsoring the podcast it must be. interesting to be you though because you. it's I feel like when there's more going. on in your head as much as it is a curse. it's also kind of there's enough of a.

world going on where you're kind of. you're dealing with that yeah you know. there's a lot of stimulation yeah um I. don't do well when I'm bored like my. mind needs something to be working on so. there's never a shortage of that um but. I think that's why getting into business. has been very beneficial for me. because I don't have those like blank. moments or blank hours where I yeah I I. would I would fill those early in my. career I'd fill them going on Twitter. for three hours and tter so much fun it.

was so much fun and I I had fun with it. yeah but I think me having fun with. people is usually like playful banter. like I'll kind of like throw a little. like jab your way and you throw on back. my way and it's like because it's. jousting match and I like that because. it's witty and it forces me to think and. like it's and I'm having these. conversations with people and I'm like. laughing and joking with them in person. and you get a sense of like I'm not. being serious you can tell very clearly.

that I'm not being serious but on. Twitter doesn't come across that way and. especially not even though the person. that you're doing it with may feel that. way may not other people reading it. might get really confused and so I would. banter with a lot of people and I think. it got construed negatively by the media. I know it got construed negatively by. the media the larger media as a whole. and then I get this reputation of being. combative and stuff and I was never. doing it from a compatitive standpoint I. understand how it looks that way and how. it came off that way and so those blank.

hours where I was just had nothing to do. and I was just like joking with people. on Twitter firing stuff off got you know. got me in trouble um Trump has a great. Dave port I interviewed Donald Trump and. he goes you ever just like he like would. you s was he asking Nick about. proofreading some of his tweets or. something Trump's like yeah you ever. just fire something off and just go to. bed and just hope it's okay and Trump. was like get all all the time you know. you're like what the hell is going on. yeah but you do that if you think about.

Twitter being a parallel to like real. life like you someone says something to. you and you just fire away because if. you pause for 5 seconds to think about. what you're going to say it almost like. gives you the Yips like you almost don't. know how to respond then CU we're so. conditioned like you say something and. I'm I'm like I have a response right but. if have you ever thought about what. proof reading like in real life would. look like like you would ask me. something and I would think of my. response and then I would pause for five.

or six seconds and really think through. my response and then I might say. something slightly differently can you. imagine a conversation like that if it. was like you say something and I pause. for like 10 seconds and then say. something back to you and then you pause. for like 10 seconds and like really. actually think through it like that we'd. be like processing our answer and then. it be printed out for the person kind of. it'd be so bizarre be so bizarre it'd be. almost like a script then yeah probably. it would be a very awkward conversation.

it's not like a normal human tendency to. have an interaction like that so when. some when you read something it's like. oh someone just said something and I'm. going to say it now it takes longer to. type it but you're still having the. thought and so you never have the option. in person to like okay I just said this. now let me proofread it let me read it. again let me check for this my friend is. this okay is this weird yeah but on on. Twitter then it's like the expectation. now for you know people in the public. eye um is that you would proof read it.

and then you would check with the. publicist or you would check with you. know someone or whatever you make sure. it was and just not the normal flow of. conversation now it might be in the. future as the as Humanity moves more. towards a digital presence like maybe. that's what happens it's going to be sad. it's not uh it's not normal yeah it's. certainly abnormal what was that thing. did you bring it up Nick what Trump. had oh por I asked the president if he. ever regrets any of the content he posts. often too often Trump said it used to be.

in the old days you'd write a letter and. you'd say this is this letter is really. big you put it on your desk and you go. back tomorrow you say oh I'm glad I. didn't send it right we don't do that. with Twitter right we put it on. instantaneously we feel great and then. you start getting phone calls did you. really say. this half the time it's like damn I. didn't I never and I never would have. thought that that would be interpreted. that way thought twice about it yeah oh. it's ridiculous now and then people like. take it down people say it's like it's. definitely it's weird it's weird the way.

that we communicate now how foreign it. is and I think also how like as humans. we're not supposed to adapt to the way. we communic like it's so abnormal to. Nature our nature I think that a lot of. it ends up making us feel sick or. confused sometimes I'll send stuff to. Nick and I'll be like is this okay you. know do I seem chill does it seem crazy. am I Gay's like dude this is fine bro. you're just you're doing fine but it's.

like I think yeah and as you have some. notoriety especially for your sport um. I'm sure like the the microscope gets. even even tougher um okay so you get. through so you're going through the. major leagues yeah you have some there's. some great videos of you out there like. impersonating like other players and. stuff dude so funny man so when when do. you start to get the entertainment. aspect how did that kind of come into. you do you feel like I think when I got. comfortable that I was good and that.

I had largely like established myself. where I was going to be able to have a. career like early in your career you're. just fighting to stay there and it's. like if you have a bad outing you might. not be there the next day but once you. get to a certain level it's like okay I. have some leeway here I can't be bad. forever but if I have a bad start or two. it's not going to be like I'm gone and. so that gives you a little becomes. manageable yeah and it gives you a. little sense of. like settle in you can take a breath you.

can be a little bit more comfortable and. then you start having some of these. longer standing relationships with guys. on your team because now you've been. teammates for two three four years um. and you have some of those jokes and. like each game and moment becomes a. little bit less serious because because. of that comfortability and then you have. you can start joking around and you can. start having fun um so really like 2018. I had a really good second half of the. Year 2017 really good start to 2018 and.

I started like. feeling more like comfortable and like. settled with the team and I started you. know entertaining I'm. pretty like I'm I like the banter like. we talked about I like the kind of witty. interactions and so I like figuring out. the puzzle of how do I like take this. normally mundane thing and just put a. little twist on it like make it more. entertaining for people and then yeah.

starting in like. 2020 really after I started the media. company um momentum in 2019 it was like. okay this is an attention economy so in. order for baseball to grow there have to. be clips that are viral enough to get to. the youth that they see it like oh. baseball's fun right and then I'm like. okay how do I start making some of these. viral Clips well let me study NBA what. goes viral in NBA uh when people do. something like they dunk on someone and. they celebrate it like when LeBron's.

flexing on someone like that's. everywhere right when Curry hits a three. but before he the ball's in the bucket. he's already running down the court like. celebrating it because he knows it's in. like that's everywhere so like okay how. do you apply some of that to baseball. it's like all right what can you do in. baseball like are you going to celebrate. a strikeout that'd be comparable to like. flexing on someone when you dunk on them. right are you going to call your shot on. you know the day before the game I'm. going to do this with this person are. you going to have some sort of you know. what does that look like in baseball. it's a good point yeah and so I started.

getting the entertainment aspect of it. because I was settled with the. performance like I can entertain or and. compete at the same time right so I can. compete and just not do any. entertainment and you're going to get. the same level of performance out of me. that you'll get if I'm also doing a. little bit of entertainment um because. I've it's like my base operating level. is intense compet ition D you're an. interesting dude bro I'm all messed up. my mind's my mind's it's cool it's just.

neat to get a look at how you operate. man it's it's really interesting I. appreciate you talking with me man um. yeah because you're you're but you're. right though if you're trying to build. this sport that's what you have those. are the you need some of those moments. yeah you know like the um there's a. video out there and it's a bunch it's. it's of you just impersonating some of. the other players on your team I think. when you're with the um yeah the Indians. we're in Pittsburgh with the Indians it. was uh shout out Sunshine Clevenger over. there too dude yeah you know Mike yeah. yeah definitely uh been around Mike man.

he's he's such an entertaining guy yeah. um so this is uh this is a funny story a. lot of people don't know like the. followup to this story so you can see. the guys in the background of this video. have rain uh like tarps on or whatever. so it's raining right so you're in a. raining game and this is here Cleveland. versus Pittsburgh what year is this this. is. 2018 maybe I don't. and as you come up to bat here you keep. kind of impersonating I guess different. players on your team their batting. stances yeah yeah so we had a lot of.

unique batting stances this year um and. so always like we get four days off in. between starts as a starting pitcher so. we're in The Dugout just messing around. like we don't have anything to do and so. I was always grabbing something and. trying to impersonate you know mik AIS. Jason Kipnis Raburn brandle like some of. these guys that had really unique. characteristics and so um at one point. think it was M was like hey when are you. going to do that for real like you won't. and I was like I'll do it so I go and I. have this at bat where I you know do.

rurn and kipness and were they all. shocked they were all if you look at the. dug I don't know if there's a view of it. they're all like laughing yeah there. that's Mike right there he just it yeah. seems like such a neat guy huh Kip's. awesome yeah so the followup to this. though is I get I walk in this bat and. so I'm on first base and I'm just this. stupid pitcher like you know running the. bases and whatever and so the catcher. you know obviously the you Pittsburgh. wasn't super like oh they're applauding. again cool Pittsburgh wasn't super like.

pleased with that oh CU they're like you. guys are joking around out here yeah so. right after that the next pitch like I. take my lead off first and the catcher. catches the ball and like fakes like. he's going to throw it down first base. was nowhere close but I'm not used to. being on base because I suck as a hitter. I'm never on base right so he goes to. throw it down to first and I freak out. and I like dive back and there's no. first baseman there it's muddy and I. stick in the mud and I don't even make. like my hand sticks I don't even make it. back to the base I'm just laying there.

by the base looking around there's no. one there the catcher never threw the. ball and I'm covered in mud yeah and he. just like pointed at me and like threw. the ball back to the pitcher I'm like. all right all right that's good you got. me that's good I respect. that yeah that's classic that's such a. neat thing about life too how it works. it's like the second you start to get on. your high horse even just a little like. knock you down here you go there there's. another really good example that we're. playing the Padres 2021 we're at Dodger.

Stadium um and I facing I'm facing uh. Eric Hosmer now I knew hos from he was. in Kansas City when I was with Cleveland. so we played each other a lot so we have. a little bit of a you know a history. like playing each other so the first at. bat I throw him a curveball he like half. swings at it and strikes out and I like. hit him with my sword celebration and uh. the next the batty comes up I throw him. a curveball instead of missing it he. hits a rocket right back at my face like. it would have it would have killed me if. I didn't get out of the way I end up.

like laying on my back and I'm like. laying that on the M like what just. happened fortunately didn't hit me and. he's over at first base and I start to. sit up and there's actually a picture of. me yeah this is probably it is this yeah. that right and I don't know if this. video clip goes long enough but uh see. if I laugh right here yeah yeah right. there so he's at first base he like hey. and I look over at him and he uh he gave. me the sword back back so I got him the.

I got him the pit that the had bat. before and then he just like got me back. and then let me know about it tatis had. a great one he had a home run off me. like put one one hand over his eye cuz. in spring training I had like thrown in. a bat with one eye closed and then. against the padr and then they waited. and then when he got me back he put his. eye his hand over do you mind this stuff. you think it's fun I love it yeah it's. cool actually dude if people if people. would like celebrate on me all the time. I don't care like that's good for the.

game yeah dude and it would be so kind. of there's one thing like Savannah. bananas you know you see them yeah there. sh some of their shit's gotten crazy. they're like doing the Newsies the. musical between second and third. inning you're like Jesus Christ. 90 minute musical like let's get the. game going you know uh but it's also. there's something that's just fun about. um just a little bit of the of the. adding more to it and I think you're. right I think if you you know there's a. little bit.

more Ambiance between some of the. players MH it definitely right there. you're like oh he's GNA it's almost. like when you you know that um like Gary. pton was gonna guard uh Michael Jordan. or something like oh I want to I want to. tune in because I know that four times. they're going to face each other let's. see how this shakes out I mean. Strickland and dupi just fought right. yeah that fight was not really. interesting until they had the little. Skirmish in the crowd and Strickland. like through the elbow and they fought.

and then everyone's like oh we got to. watch this fight and the fight it was a. great fight like I thought Shawn won. personally but what you think about it I. thought it was 3-2 I thought he. outstruck he outstruck him um didn't. think that dupi got much out of the. takedowns a lot of takedowns but not a. whole lot came from them um I don't hate. the decision like very close fight could. have gone either way I had it I had it. 3-2 Strickland judges had it 3-2 dupy. you like the fights yeah I'm a big UFC.

fan yeah oh cool bro me too yeah I feel. like do I feel like there should be a. little more gravity if you're going to. give the belt away that's what it felt. like to me I was like it's this close. and you're going to give the belt away. like if you're going to beat somebody. for the belt there should be a little. more gravity to it yeah should be like. definitive you beat them yes yeah like. if it's a regular match I get it yeah. but and maybe that's I'm just a somebody. who sits in the crowd and and wishes. they could be tough enough to be out. there but um yeah I wouldn't want to be.

in the ring but you know one of the. things you said earlier made me think. what I've heard a lot of guys say. they're like they can be great guys neat. guys but they have to believe when they. go in there that they are the baddest. in the world because if. they don't believe that yeah the the. what can happen is just they don't stand. they're not giving themselves any sort. of a chance yeah you know yeah God and. that's just got to be I can't imagine. like what that what the walk must be.

like like it's you and another human. like in a death match yeah like it's got. to be a crazy adrenaline rush but it's. also got to be super scary like. I walking out to play a baseball game. like you win you lose it sucks if you. lose but like there's not that visceral. consequence yeah like you out there you. I don't think they've ever had a death. in UFC but like you get seriously hurt. like bad yeah and some of the guys they.

seem already hurt before they ever. fought you're like damn this guy he. needs to keep whatever he's got still in. the tank he's got a he can't lose. anymore yeah you know oh but yeah the. fact that they and they love it that's. the crazy thing some of them yeah they. love it like you could see sometimes. like gaii or pory just how like just. that's that's their thing yeah. that lights them up imagine only getting. to perform like twice a year too that's.

the toughest part I hate I hate baseball. Cadence where I only get to play once. every fifth or sixth day I can't imagine. twice a year once a year yeah yeah. imagine once a year Trevor bow gets to. come out and throw some and and pitch a. game for like 20 minutes God can you. imagine training for a. year and then you get 20 minutes and it. like it could be over in 30. seconds I can't it's almost like I think. penguins are only fertile for like 11. minutes out of the Year oh really yeah.

that's a crazy stat I never heard that. before so it's almost like. that. um but yeah if you find anything on that. Nick let me know i' almost I got a buddy. said he had some shouldn't say this but. he had the option if I wanted to get a. little bit of penguin meat which would. be crazy to eat but I've had puffing. have you really in Iceland yeah oh my. God Trevor Puffin kangaroo Puffin. Icelandic. horse shark shark was terrible oh yeah.

the fermented shark so like ferment the. shark and they freeze it and they serve. it in these like little cubes it's like. a delicacy in Iceland and they love it I. it tastes like gasoline I couldn't D it. was I don't know had a acquired taste. for sure oh yeah yeah especially yeah. and if you've had real gasoline dude. it's like you don't want anit. yeah you want the real thing but yeah. I've had reindeer somewhere I've had. owl had uh what else if I wanted to have.

I wouldn't I don't know if you want to. have penguin though you know people just. love him to I just yeah they're kind of. like the French Bulldog of the north I. feel like yeah like you couldn't imagine. eating french bulldog no you Frenchies. are way too cute yeah that's the thing. people people would be pissed I now it. would taste good I bet ah I'm not even. go down that route I know some Frenchies. and I know people that love their. Frenchies I can't even imagine but yeah. yeah let's don't even say anything else.

about. it um so you get to your career's going. you a Sai Young winner y that had to be. unbelievable are you chasing that at a. certain point of the season does it get. like where you're almost like the. drivers in NASCAR where it's like you're. I chased that for 10 years wow so I went. to college and like I said earlier I I. studied Tim linicum mhm and he won a. golden spikes award which is basically. the Heisman Trophy of baseball goes to. like the best college baseball player.

and I went to college and my only goal. not my only personal goal like I wanted. to win the College World Series and. everything like that with my team but my. personal goal was to win the golden. spikes award and I won that my junior. year of college so like check that box. off did you really I didn't know that. dud congratul that's you were the best. player in college baseball yeah the one. one yeah wow bro yeah was pretty cool um. mainly because like I set a goal and I. spent literally all of my time I like.

should have gone to class more like. didn't I just did not go to school but. it was like baseball and just my. thoughts my like training everything was. just like on that and I accomplished it. and it's like a sense of Pride that I. could set a goal and like accomplish it. it wasn't the ego of being the best guy. it was the fact that I set a goal wow. and like worked my way and actually. accomplished that go goal and so after. that I was like okay what's next I'm. like well Tim won two sa young Awards I. think he has he might have had three I. think he has I know he has two and I was.

like okay that's the new goal and so. from 2011 when I won the golden spikes. for the next 10 years I was chasing the. sa Young Award and everything I did was. like okay who's the best pitcher in. baseball what do they do better than I. do and like let me go work on that and. it's did he get uh oh yeah three-time. World Series champion two time S Young. Award yeah back to back 08 and 09 dude. he was you're halfway there those two. years. [Music]. were guess I remember that something.

different like it was just. so so unique what Tim was able to do um. Tim linicum yeah yeah and so I yeah from. 2011 he had the long hair too remember. yeah God to be able to do so well with. long hair too you know Randy Johnson did. that or eckerle did that there just it's. a special yeah just be like yeah my hair. and then go out there and throw. total gas on people that's crazy yeah.

what were you saying he won oh so he won. he won two of them I won it in so I won. the golden spikes 2011 I was like I I I. want the sa young and so everything I. did for the next 10 years was centered. around like what does the best pitcher. do that's better than am and like let me. develop that skill set what pitch does. he throw how hard does he throw is he. durable what's his command how's his. nutrition like all this stuff and so I. just worked at it and then 2020 I won. the sa young um which is like.

a the the pitching coach at with the. Reds um Derek Johnson I've been I've. known Derek for he's like one of my guys. I've known him since 2000 since I was. getting recruited to college I wanted to. go to Vanderbilt and play for music. Vanderbilt at the time but he's like in. the baseball circles that I kind of run. in Caleb cam was the assistant pitching. coach he was uh I trained with him for. years in off dog he guys your dogs uh. Eric Jaggers was there like he was um I.

trained with him and like one of my guy. like all my people Sunny gray was there. like all my all my people were there and. like to have that year it was super. special um do they get also a copy of. the no so they give outward they give. out one award um but for my catchers I. got them uh they're both kind of like. watch guys so I got got uh we all got. like rolex's I let them pick their their. watch and it all has like 2020 NL sa. young engraved wow dude look how happy.

look man yeah yeah and actually this was. um we were playing the Reds uh this day. so uh sunny and Lou Castillo and DJ. actually came over for the ceremony I. have some pictures with them so you w it. with the Reds but you didn't get the. award till the next season yeah when you. were playing with the Dodgers wow and. then for you were playing against the. Reds when you got it I think they. scheduled the ceremony for that day for. that for that crossover dude that must. have been so crazy yeah I you go on for.

10 years on my phone I had a picture of. a sa Young Award um I think it was I. don't remember exactly whose sa Young. Award it was I used to see the name. every day and then every time I opened. my phone that was the background picture. of my phone like every time I was. looking at it I just would see it in my. mind and then I replaced that picture. with now the background on my phone is. my sa Young Award um because I want. another one but yeah I chased it for 10.

years and finally like finally. accomplished it which is a a pretty. crazy um to chase something for 10 years. uh and finally get it is like such a. cool feeling I didn't even know like how. to feel it was like I can't believe this. actually. happened yeah are you able to feel proud. Pride like kind of well do. you not in not in the moment um and by. the time I win something I've already. like set the next Target yeah and I was.

like I wanton it and I was like okay but. anyone can win one like wow you can't. win who who can how many guys have won. two how many have won three and like so. I just it's one of my struggles I need. to get better at it is like actually. enjoying the fact that I did this really. cool thing what a trickster your brain. is and cuz sometimes our brain is like a. trickster it's like oh well it's like. and what about this you know it's like. sometimes if I can look at that.

almost like yeah and try and enjoy it. not be too hard on myself not you know. constantly be pushing the goal line but. sometimes if I can just look at myself. and be like what a trickster you. are brain you're gonna go and make. you're gonna we just did it you're yeah. like let me let me like hang out here. for a little bit I enjoy this but if I. can at least laugh at that part of me. that does it instead of look at it like. man it just keeps moving and I'm never. able to have any fun that can help me. have a little bit of a different like. space there like I get like uh long-term.

enjoyment out of it like little little. hits of it here and there so the award. is actually up in my room at my parents. house like where I grew up and I this is. where I you I still have artwork that I. made in high school that's on the walls. and like hats that I had signed by. people that are hanging there like it's. it's like my room um and so the award is. like hang hanging up like in my. childhood room um because I feel like. that's where it belong like most people. put it in like a case and like that's.

where the journey started got it and. like that's where it I feel like it just. belongs. like the young kid that like never. thought he'd play Big League Baseball. because big league baseball players are. they're Superstars they're like. different than me and all of a sudden I. end up being of those people and have. this thing that like only the best of. the best get and it's like still when I. see it up there I'm like this is crazy.

like yeah I have a note from my high. school coach threatening to kick me off. the team next to like the sa Young Award. like the the the the disparity between. those things is like such a such an. interesting contrast you know bro it's. that oh that's so many feelings that's. so much at once dude what was what was. he threatening to kick you off for do. you remember dude I. was I have like four or five of them uh. I got thrown out of a game one time I. was hitting and uh umpire made a b what.

I thought was a bad call so I flipped my. bat and I like drew a line in the sand. of like where the ball acrossed the. plate didn't say a word I got tossed and. then of course like you're getting. thrown out of a game not good look for. the high school program there's times. where like the park that I mentioned. earlier where i' go up and do practice. like I would go up there and throw B. there's a tennis court with like a. really high fence next to a big open. grass field and so I would throw long. toss on the open grass field and the. ball would hit the fence and like there.

and I had to throw by myself so I'd have. two buckets of balls and I would throw. them all and then go pick them up and. keep throwing and then one of the local. tennis instructors didn't like the noise. of the ball hitting the fence and so he. would go and like we had this years long. like Feud and he would come out in the. middle of his tennis lessons and like. grab my buckets of baseballs and steal. them so I couldn't throw and then he. would like call the cops on me and like. all this stuff but the thing is there. was no signs it's public park no signs.

on the fence saying that I couldn't. throw against it we'd gone to city. council and like cleared it and made. sure it was okay he just didn't like it. so a lot. of lot of just technical back and forth. yeah but you like to make sure that you. you're kind of like me I think it seems. in some ways I think I like I always. wanted to make sure how I felt was known. I always wanted to have my say in things. so or be able to have my say that's what. I felt like and it's sometimes it's a. blessing and sometimes it's a curse for. sure um I.

had I had I I remember the the morning. um that that kind of like changed for me. I was 17 was in high school I had gotten. up in the morning to go to the YMCA did. my pre preschool workout came back. showered was looking in the mirror I was. like you know why what what is it about. me that like I don't have friends that. people like like don't like me that they. bully me that they pick on me like all. this stuff and I just made the decision. that day I was like I like myself like.

I'm good in school I treat people well. I'm hardworking I'm whatever like I like. what I see looking back at me so I'm. going to be okay with that and I'm not g. to I'm going to stop chasing like. approval from other people and as long. as I can be proud of myself like I'm. cool with it and so that gave me the. freedom internally to like have a voice. and when someone would say something to. me I'd fire back and I would feel better. about myself because I felt like I was. defending myself and standing up for. myself and my life got a lot.

better uh through the rest of high. school and into college because of that. because I felt like I had a voice and I. was being heard instead of just being. like swatted down all the time and then. as my life situation changed you know. something that can be good at one point. can be bad at other points um as my life. situation changed as people stopped. picking on me as much as you I got into. professional baseball and my profile in. baseball grew I was still very quick to. just like fire back at people and you.

know fans normally in like the Bantry. like good-natured way but media people. you know uh onair personalities writers. and stuff like that um they would write. something about me that I didn't like or. that I disagreed with or I felt was UN. true that's one thing that really bugs. me is when someone writes something that. is not true about about anyone like I. don't think you should because it. affects the person's uh reputation and. stuff you know um so I would just fire. back at them and I was like okay I'm.

justifying this to myself because they. attacked me first and they said this. stuff that isn't true they set the terms. where they're going to just come out of. they're going to go out of their way to. like I wouldn't pick on them they're. going to come after me well okay unleash. it like fire back yeah I think makes. good sense yeah I would just unload on. on people though like said some pretty. hurt ful things and then you know I get. the reputation of being this like. combative person which I'm not but.

that's how I appeared on online and I. don't think I updated. my like how. I uh behaved and interpreted the world. like I don't think I updated that as. quickly as like my life situation. changed I see and so I got to a point. where like I didn't need to be doing. that stuff and there's a much more. mature way to handle those things like. just have a conversation with a person. instead of just like online like firing. back um so that's one thing over the.

last couple years I've really tried to. like update evolve in update my my how I. perceived the world like how I operate. in the world to match like my life. situation well sometimes it makes sense. that that takes like um sometimes the. world doesn't take into account that we. have to get to certain places where we. have enough space to look around at our. environment. and update our own software right and. and and sometimes it takes time it's. like and and that's just what it is you.

know but um the media is also gross I. want to I'll say that you don't have to. say that and um uh I think the media is. very gross these days there's countless. things that are printed all the time and. said that have no. uh jurist Prudence is that a word Nick. why am I saying. that sounds right jurist Prudence I. don't know what oh it just means a legal. system oh yeah yeah I just I don't know. no merit I don't know I think I remember.

just reading uh Scarlet Letter and that. popped into my head for some reason but. I'm forever stuck on whatever books I. read in like ninth grade bro. forever dude people like you you have a. good vocabulary I'm like dude if it. wasn't in uh The Scarlet Letter. dude I don't know it um but no it's. interesting man and especially I think. learning more about you you see like oh. well this is this guy has had to kind of. like create his own operating software. to fit what's works with him in his. world you know and that's um a lot of.

people you don't get to know that about. him you know um I think Society there. should be. more uh the way Society is right now is. everything's like very short attention. span and very final yeah it is this or. it is that and then that's true for the. rest of time um where in reality it's. like this might have been the case at. this specific moment in time with these. circumstances this person feeling one. way on that day because of this other.

thing this other person feeling this. other way on and then like that. situation changes so the people change. the next day the next week the next year. but you look at you look back at. something someone said five years ago. and you're like oh well he's a terrible. person because of this or oh I love him. because of this one thing when like it's. a tiny snapshot of a brief moment that. doesn't describe. the whole of the situation the person. the intent the anything but Society I.

think is like so short with forming an. opinion well especially with athletes. you only get to see certain amounts of. them yeah like um and when they go on a. lot of long form conversations a lot of. times they um there's someone you know. there's a lot of fear about you know. saying certain they don't want to say. too you know they don't want to get in. trouble you only see certain like uh. snapshots of them on the Seline you see. a guy get upset two times yeah you have. no idea what's happened or what's going. on but suddenly you're like oh that.

guy's the problem dude I saw the best. example of that um it's NBA game I think. it was Durant it might have been someone. else but um I'm just gonna say it was. Durant because I that's what that's. what's in my head but he's doing an. interview right on the court right after. the game right and the reporter asked. him a question he's got a microphone in. his face oh yeah the team this and that. and the other whatever and he's got this. like polished like you can tell like. it's. a he's been trained like how to talk to.

the media like say words without saying. anything at all like not a whole don't. say anything at all basically but say. something so in the middle of one of his. answers one of his teammates or I think. someone from the other team comes up to. like hey good game and he steps away. from the microphone for like 3 seconds. and completely changes just like oh. what's up brother hey great is like. going into this whole thing with someone. that he's comfortable with in a. different way yeah and he comes back to. the interview right back into like the.

media mode and I'm like if that's not. the perfect example of how like what you. see is not always what is true right um. I don't know what is yeah there's a. certain protecting of the realm in a lot. of ways you know which part of it makes. sense too especially I think with. baseball because baseball has this um I. have to pee so bad man is that okay sure. do you have to pee or you okay I'm good. wow that's amazing when people don't. have to pee to me um what um so. everything was going so your so your.

career was going great yeah and then you. had this you had the instance that. happened with the uh allegations right. is that the best way to say it how do. people yeah I mean there's allegations. against me stuff I didn't do but dick. gets out in social media the media. writes about it and uh to be fair like. they were very serious allegations like. what was alleged was very you know. should be investigated and should be. taken very seriously um just you know.

the way the system works it's like those. get those allegations get made there's. an open investigation you know I'm. advised not to say anything so it's only. it's a very one-sided discussion for a. long period of time right and then that. influences public perception over it and. then when the facts start coming out. when the truth starts coming out it's a. much smaller. uh there's there's a lot less Buzz. around it and so the public perception's. already been influenced in a certain way. it must have been harrowing to go.

through yeah it. sucked it sucked um it still. sucks um. but um so and it doesn't even sound like. it was that CRA it sounds like there was. just you message with a woman online you. guys both agree to spend time together. you spend time together um it's later. revealed that she had the idea that she. wanted. to she had a plan or a strategy to.

um did it say like. to take from you I'm trying to think. what the strategy was there's there was. yeah texts about you know taking my. money um gosh getting in yeah stuff like. that yeah next star picture for the. Dodgers um and what's so crazy is Trev. is I was like 3 months ago I'm looking. at some stuff online am I okay talking.

with you about this do you feel okay for. sure all right um I'm looking at some. stuff online I see pictures of the girl. and I'm like how do I know this girl I. had she had connected with me over. social media at some point um and we met. up she came to a comedy show and then. she came afterwards we went to my hotel. we just sat in the lobby and chatted. yeah and uh she like knew some friend we. had some mutual friends and stuff and um. but we just sat there and chatted and. then I got her an Uber home yeah um.

thank goodness I guess you know but but. that it just blew I'm like looking at. I'm like how do I but even that to me. cuz I knew she I felt like she wanted to. stay over and spend time you know it. just blew my mind I'm like is this is. this like a thing like was this person. like doing this kind of stuff regularly. or was it it just happen stance that you. know anyway it just that and that got me. even more into your world kind of and uh. and I really started to look back at. what had gone on and and man it was just.

I think a lot of people felt like it was. just a really raw deal yeah I mean I. certainly feel that way um I can't. change it obviously at this point like. it it is what it is like the situation. happened. um I've had to. I I've had to do like two like two main. things one I've had to like self-reflect. okay how did I get into this situation.

where like something like this is even. possible yeah and then two I've had to. look towards the future and try to have. something that I'm moving towards or. something that I'm trying to accomplish. because if I don't and I would just get. mired in this really negative stuff um. and that's you know it's not good for. mental Health it's not good for. productivity or the people that I'm. around or you know wow stuff like that. so I've done a lot of reflecting and. like looking at mistakes that I made.

and. um a lot of like there's a lot of. components to this whole situation like. number one like my interactions. with uh females like in general like I. paid very little attention to my. personal life cuz I was so focused on. baseball and then when I started my. businesses it was baseball and business. and I just didn't pay attention to. anything else so I just like I didn't.

think anything of it someone would hit. me up on Instagram and like oh. yeah you do whatever I I didn't think. anything of it and I think it at the. time it was like well I I treat people. well and I'm respectful and like I don't. I'm not doing anything improper and so. like that's fine I'm yeah that's a way. to live I'm living the way you're. supposed to be living yeah and it never. even crossed my mind that something like. this could happen um but you know I was. associating with people that were not. that didn't.

see yeah people were like hitting me up. on Instagram because they knew me. somehow but I didn't know them you know. I would just meet up with them I knew. very little about them um that was. dangerous in my position part of like. what discussed about the software update. like I see myself as just this guy. that's like even with everybody else. that just you know and then I get into a. position in life where that's not the. case and I become a Target and I just. didn't see like the signs of being a. Target or whatever and so I didn't.

update my software early enough and it's. a bummer yeah it's a bummer because you. also you want to be able to meet people. on even terms that's the toughest thing. about sometimes having some popularity I. think and something it's sometimes kind. of like I don't want to say sad because. nobody's like hey look man you get to. have a lot of neat do a lot of neat. things yeah I I don't ever want to come. off like a victim like it was like I was. treated no I don't think it sound way or. whatever it's just like there are. realities to the certain situations and. definitely very very positive like being. a professional athlete and like having.

that opportunity like there's so many. positives to it um I don't ever want to. come off like I'm complaining yeah but. there are certain realities that go. along with it that you have to be. cognizant of and um yeah I just I didn't. update quick enough to be cognizant of. them before it happened I've updated now. like I've changed. a lot of how I do things in my personal. life like I'm very careful of who I meet. and how I meet them um you know I'm not. having the same type of just casual.

sexual relationships and I'm not. agreeing to do the same types of like. sexual things um I'm not like dating a. bunch of people I've like really locked. down my personal life and gone back to. the to the square one like what do I. care about in a personal relationship. okay I want someone that's a b c d what. whatever okay let me go try to find. those things actively instead of just. being okay with anybody that's. approaching me just.

to have someone around in those blank. moments where like oh I have two hours. at night and I have nothing to do so. like I'll just have someone I'll meet up. with somebody exactly yeah oh dude it's. saying look I can relate I'm not trying. to take your conversation here but just. young man can relate to that just the. same type of thing it's like and even. young women it's like it just becomes a. habitual thing yeah you know people. think they're you know but it's like. yeah sometimes the reason why maybe I. haven't landed exactly where I would. like to be um it's yeah it's like have I.

if well I just if I just kind of take. whatever like shooting star passes. through the sky yeah as opposed to going. out and looking for like somebody that's. the real sunshine you know it's. like and not you might Clevenger but uh. like a preferably female but um but yeah. I feel you man it's like I can all day. because people just kind of come and go. all the time and that's fine you can do. that but if you really want to go out. and you and like emulate what you want.

into the world and then hopefully get. that back you know yeah I think longterm. wise like it's just a much more. healthy uh situation for me personally. um to be surrounded by people that are. interested in the same things that push. me in a positive way to get better to. learn more. to achieve more whatever that support in. moments one of the biggest things is. like getting through the last couple. years I even today like it's still a.

struggle today with you know there's. still ongoing like ramifications of. everything um but just having the. support group around you that like you. know these people care about you and not. the attributes that you like not the. bank account or the fame or the. notoriety or whatever the lifestyle like. having that support group you know. weeding out some of the people that were. around that like didn't feel that way. and really locking down the people that. you Vibe with and that like you know.

have your back and are going to give you. some of those free spaces to mess up and. like as long as you learn and continue. getting better they're not just like. gone when one bad thing happens right. that's been so important um and I'm so. thankful for those people my family like. my business partner my agent Rachel like. there's a lot of other people friends I. can't name everybody of course but yeah. those people the support group that are. there it's so important yeah like when.

hit the fan right was it like did. it kind of was it totally a shock to you. it was it was pretty bad yeah um I went. from focusing on my next start to then. like this article came out and then I'm. having all these conversations and then. I'm not allowed at the field and I'm. still going to pitch in two days but. then I'm not going to pitch in two days. and then I can't take the team flight. back uh because I'm not allowed to be.

with the team right now and then I can't. take a commercial flight back home. because I'm my name's everywhere and. it's such a big story that like it's. going to be a disaster at you know. taking commercial flight to renting a. car and driving from DC like back across. the United States in the middle of. season not knowing when I'm going to. rejoin the like it was a who drove with. you um I drove with my agent Rachel oh. um yeah she was in DC and then we were. there for two or three days and then.

drove back across country um yeah. it was it was uh it happened pretty. quick and then obviously like you have. the legal stuff that plays out you have. you know investigation and um you know. was never never arrested for anything. was never charged with anything there. was never any that drug out for. uh drug out is a wrong word because like. the allegations are serious and they. should have you know they looked into. them thoroughly and I respect the hell. out of the police for doing that like I. think all allegations like this should.

be looked into with that amount of. thorough uh thoroughness yeah but it it. lasted for nine months before the. decision was made that there was going. to be no no charges whatever the whole. time I was like not able to be with a. team there was no resolution there's no. I didn't know when any of those. decisions were going to come out so I'm. just in this holding pattern and then. there was MLB suspended me and then. there was you know. we um appealed the suspension and then.

that took another I don't even remember. how long that took another period of. time um things move slowly in the you. know as they go through courts and as. they go through uh unb arbitrations and. stuff like that so and who was there who. was like really there for you while you. like yeah um parents have been parents. have been great. um uh Rachel I've mentioned um she was. there business partner Tosh uh a lot of. my uh employees that I consider close.

friends Kevin Eric um you know we've. hired more people along the way as well. that have been like there um whole time. um yeah friends I mean there's people. that I just know that for you know since. school or whatever that like would check. in with me coaches um I don't want to. name names because I don't whatever but. a lot of coaches and and that I've known.

through baseball a lot of players. teammates you had some good support yeah. um and I think it's because people that. I've played with people that I've been. in the clubhouse with people that I've. known personally looked at their. experience with who I am and what they. know of me and like what's being said. and they just just like nope there's no. way that there's no way that happened. and um yeah so I think you know publicly.

it's been seen as like I'm this you know. there's reports that I you know Dodgers. organization doesn't want me around and. teammates don't this and I'm not welcome. here and all that stuff but like what's. been seen publicly and my experience of. what's been going on kind of behind the. scenes and and my interactions with. people and stuff like that have been. completely different wow um so it's. actually been it's been good like. knowing. that you know the the people that I know. that have been around me have. that uh amount of I guess trust or that.

have had a good experience with me and. like believe yeah I saw mie best said. some nice things there was in that um or. that that's what they they put out in. the Articles you just don't know with a. lot of these articles man and the. lawyers too that's the shadiest part. sometimes is like um it seemed like in. your since the. lawyers uh use the media to make you. look worse. yeah that's crazy exactly that's.

like why wouldn't you just do what the. rule like it just man that made. me it just was sick it was sickening I. don't know enough about the legal system. to Warrant having an opinion so I don't. want this to come off as like I am. advocating for one thing or another but. it seems like there's this Loop poll. having been through it where like you. can make a domestic violence uh. restraining order request you can file. for for one of those and you can write a.

whole bunch of stuff and that's fine. because you have to be able to write. what happened and make your claim and. then that is. filed that becomes a public document you. don't have to attach your name to it but. you can attach the other person's name. to it wow and then it takes time for. that to go through to get scheduled to. get heard to get decided. upon but the damage in today's society. is already been done as soon as that. becomes.

public that like you know we we went to. the domestic violence restraining order. Court which is like the lowest standard. of proof that you have to to in order to. get that to to win a a domestic violence. restraining order like it's the lowest. standard ofof we went to that and won. like there was no restraining order. granted but in the month or I think it. was actually like a month I think it was. like 6 weeks in between when the initial. filing and articles came out and when. that happened that's six weeks of one.

side of the story being out there and. like damage is done I can't you not to. say anything yeah and I've had great. legal representation and they've advised. me well along the way and the advice is. don't say anything and it kills me. because like I want to defend myself I. want to get the truth out there and then. it's like okay well what is the what's. the reparation for the damage that's. been done here and it doesn't seem like. there's any sort of yeah yeah and Fu. maybe there's maybe there's some sort of. update that can be made to the to that.

process like I also see the other side. of it where you know for people that are. in those situations that need a place to. be able to go and like get help and to. get out of a bad situation and to. protect themselves like we never want to. discourage that from happening either so. I don't know what the solution is here. but just like. having talked to people in professional. sports and like a lot of people have. reached out and like hey man I went. through something similar this is what. they did to me or this is what happened. in my case or this what was seemingly.

was helpful or whatever like this is a. thing that happens a lot again for I. don't I just know what happened with me. just from what I've been told right this. is your instance yeah it's um you know. the the general way is like you make. these allegations and then tell the. person you're going to file this thing. and in order and they you know the. implications it's going to be very bad. for you and so then money exchanges. hands and I've talked to multiple people. where that's been the case right so it's.

just like uh people can do that and. threat make and then you have to pay to. get rid of it yeah yeah yeah you know I. don't know how they update and it's. tough that they don't have to attach. their name to it because then there's no. real repercussions for them you know. yeah um I'm sorry you had to go through. that man yeah you know I know that. doesn't help or anything but I think a. lot of people probably feel that way we. all have our struggles and I don't like. I'm very fortunate to be in the position. I am even with all this stuff like I'm. not blind to that and so again I don't.

want to I never want to come off as like. oh wo is me and like I was victim here. or anything like that I mean I believe. that you were a victim there and I'll. just say that for myself but um I don't. think you sound like that at all yeah um. it was a tough situation we all have. tough situations in life and like. hopefully something that I say about how. I got through it or how I am trying to. like learn from past mistakes and be. better is helpful to the next person. yeah that that goes through it so it. makes their time a little bit easier. than my time was that's it's thoughtful.

of you it's kind of a powerful to get to. that place I'm sure it's been an. interesting Journey you. know it's been interesting I think in. like 10 years when I look back on it. I'll be um I think there'll be a lot of. things in my life that have. happened because of changes that I made. during this time period that I'll be. very happy with yeah um it's just very. hard to like see off into the future. when you're so in it and when you feel.

like you know you're what everything you. knew about your world is completely like. gone like you're basically just torn. down to zero like where do I go from. here what am I. doing um but as far as like updating the. software and stuff I think I'll be happy. in in five or 10 years that like changes. that I've made because of this. experience um have helped me like grow. as a person you know dude you're. in it's a it is a high road.

attitude um to hear from you for me like. I can't I can't go any other road. because it'll just it's poisonous yeah. um yeah so what's next then what's next. how do we get to see you cuz I want to. see you go for that second side young. I'm going to be really really honest. with you yeah I'd love to I mean that's. the goal like I'd like to play uh in MLB.

um you know looking for looking for a. contract. and um yeah I mean I still I've been. training the whole time like we talked. earlier about how baseball's like my. backdrop like when things go bad I go. back to this and this has been one of. the most difficult things is like when. baseball's taken away like what do I. fall back on so I just fell back on. training so I'm in you know I I I've. improved like since last people last saw. me like I I'm throwing harder I've.

developed new pitches my command's. better I'm still one of the best. pitchers in the world um I'd love to. prove that obviously I realize there's a. lot of uh you know other considerations. besides just Talent um at this point so. I'm hopeful that I get a job and I get. an opportunity to go out and and prove. that I'm good and I have a lot to offer. I think I got lot to offer the baseball. Community as a whole with content. entertainment and and all that I have a. lot to offer a team like one of the.

things I'm really passionate about is. helping young baseball players have. their journey be easier than mine so we. actually train I think we got like 20. guys that we train for free at my. facility in in Arizona in the offseason. Pro guys that come in uh I've been. working with all the pitchers there and. developing pitches and feel and mindset. and all that stuff I love that stuff so. I have a lot to offer from that. perspective I think to a team and a. clubhouse that I'm with um obviously. like performance like you got to win. games I know I can do that that's not. even a question in my mind so what was.

like the financial cuz you were making. good money yeah right yeah I signed um. so I won the sa young 2020 and then that. was your contract year I was a free. agent after that yeah wow bro that is a. dream and look I love it when dudes get. paid what George KD told me he goes. everybody's happy when somebody gets. paid man yeah for sure so you had three. years 102 million yeah so that it was a. kind of a unique structure the plan I.

had opt outs after every year the plan. was always to the first play the first. two years and then opt out and be a free. agent after the third and I would have. been two years for 85 million the way. the contract worked out so an average. value of 42 and a. half million a year. wow um which was the highest annual. average value at that time for any. baseball player I think sh just crushed. no way so you were like the top of the. heat yeah wow and did they still have to. pay you a certain amount of that yeah um. I got some of it I also lost some of it.

in the you know I think. um I don't remember exactly what the. numbers shook out to be but I lost a. significant amount of it with the. suspension and stuff like that so and. was it expensive like the law attorney. fees and all that yeah man lawyers are. uh very much needed like very special Iz. and like you know you need you need them. but um very expensive yeah so it's. been um obviously baseball's giving me a. lot financially um I'm doing fine I.

don't want to come off like I'm you know. not fine but uh it's been a heavy a. heavy hit for sure um and how do your. agents like do you try to go back at the. same rate like how does that even work. is that fair to ask you about to ask you. about yeah yeah that's fine um I don't. like I just want to play like that's. that's where I'm at um like I I'll play. for league minimum and like earn my. money based in incentives like I I don't. care whatever whatever the structure for.

the team is like that makes them most. comfortable like I it's fine with me I. just want to go play yeah you know yeah. incentive based right yeah you want to. you I'll show you if yeah if you sign me. and like something's not going right and. you don't like the reaction or you don't. whatever like you can cut me and then. you don't have to bear the um you know. the brunt of signing this let's say it's. a $10 million contract and you know.

something's not going right and you. still have to pay the 10 million I don't. I don't need that like I just want to I. want a job I want to go play and like. let me just prove that I'm still one of. the best pitchers let me prove that I. have a lot to offer the organization. yeah and then I'll get paid in. incentives I'll earn based on what I. perform I'm happy with that um I've. never like I've always wanted to be that. way too like it's I've I've only wanted. to sign one-year contracts because I. never want to be the guy that signs a.

long-term deal and then is like okay. well I'm getting paid regardless so. performance doesn't matter and I'm just. going to like play out my years or. whatever I'm just going to get massages. or whatever paint my nails or whatever. yeah like shout out to the guys that. paint their nails no problem with it but. like yeah no judgment yeah but uh like I. I'm an intense competitor and I just. want to go compete and like I would like. to be compensated fairly for what I. produce so if I produce nothing I don't. feel like I should be compensated.

anything if I'm the best pitcher in the. league I feel like I should be. compensated for being the best pitcher. in the league and the easiest way to do. that is just like minimum risk for the. team I'll play for the minimum and then. if I pitch really well then have. incentives that reward me for pitching. really well and the value that I give to. the team is equally shared and both. sides feel like they won um wow I'm I'm. happy to have any sort of. like like yeah I want to work together. with the team I want to be a positive in.

the community in the clubhouse on the. field like overall for the game of. baseball um I know that I can be that I. have no questions about it which is why. I have no problem taking like a. incentive based contract because I know. that I can go out there and deliver um I. know the type of person that I am I know. the type of results that I'm be able to. produce and I'm willing to bet on myself. in that way but at the at the end of the. day like I just I just want to compete. like I just want a chance to go compete.

and like do the thing that I've spent 30. years becoming one of the best in the. world at and the thing that I love to do. um bro I would if I had a team if I had. even if we had a spot here I'd hire you. right now I'd hire you to pit what would. you what would you call it what what. your what your team name be oh that's a. great question huh put you on the. spot what's a good team name probably. maybe uh the Reverb or the lisps the. lisps yeah one of my best friends.

growing up Douglas had a lisp and I. would always um I would impersonate him. because I was in it was like the he had. the unique voice and one of the teachers. one time thought I was making fun of him. I'm like what do you mean I'm not he's. like he God put that remix in him like. he's doing something different like I. just thought it was so cool you know so. the lists could be kind of cool cuz it's. like taking something that can be. considered kind of like maybe not the. best but making it positive you that. could be pretty dope what else the. Nashville lisps o dude it's got a ring.

yeah might be the list dude yeah. thri I sounded like hoe Mandell saying. that joke um but dude well if we could. if we could afford you even at basic. mene we'd pay you a pitch here but we. don't have a team we don't have we don't. have a field. but God dude that yeah we just got to. see you back out there there's no valid. reason why you shouldn't be back out. there yeah I appreciate you saying that. like I there's no valid it doesn't even.

make nothing if the universe doesn't. make this happen it doesn't even make. any sense anymore yeah yeah I uh I'm. hopeful that it will I'm hopeful it will. I I just I would like to entertain. people i' like to to pitch I'd like to. win when does spring training start uh. usually like second week around. Valentine's Day second week of February. some teams are like February 12th some. teams are like February 16th it's like. they all kind of report at different. dates but yeah middle of February bro. date with the diamond huh yeah and.

that's not Dustin pory I'm talking about. uh baseball diamond yeah yeah we could. see it bro yeah just looking for an. opportunity uh I want to play an MLB I. love Japan I I have absolutely nothing. negative to say about Japan um and at. some point like being separated from the. culture that I'm comfortable with and. I'm used to to like it was tough and. being away from friends and family and. stuff like that everyone made everyone. there made it so much better than it. could have been and I'm very. appreciative but yeah I would like I. would like to play an MLB I would like.

to chase the second sa young I'd like to. you know try to win a World Series I. finished second you know oh yeah you. guys came in second place with the. Dodgers uh no with uh with Cleveland in. 2016 and I finished second in college uh. we lost to TCU in the national champion. or not TCU to South Carolina in National. Championship so I finished I finished. second twice I'd like to actually win. one wow um but yeah yeah dude it would. be so cool what if you got to play with. the Padres but if you got to play with. the Dodgers Walker buer plays over there.

D they just went and signed uh uh sh and. Yamamoto too oh that's right I talked to. I talked to Yamamoto when I was in Japan. uh through an interpreter like he's he's. a he's a pretty special pitcher I'm. excited to see how he does um would love. to would love to play there sh's a. pitcher of there too right sh showy. Yamamoto ber uh Kershaw is a free agent. still I don't know if he's going to sign. but I'm not sure his spine's going to. hold it pieced but I mean he's he's.

pieced up in the spine he's amazing yeah. but he's just yeah he's like uh you got. a massage that yeah you got to get him. into that wagu shape you because he's. just you know his body's turn so much. he's got so much so many innings under. his belt it's such a high level that. like no one's body can take it for. forever right um but I mean even so with. all the with all the years and the. mileage like he put up a fantastic. season last year it's incredible seeing. what he's the longevity he's had and. like the consistency of results just.

like it's crazy and their head coach. who's the Dodgers head coach Dave. Roberts yeah dude that guy's cool man. bring up a picture of Dave Roberts dude. UCLA yeah bro oh do you play with him at. UCL too I didn't play with him but he. was a he's a brewing yeah wow dude yeah. he's cool man. he's funny yeah they got some funny guys. over there it's a cool organization it. it would be cool to it' be cool to play. you I'd obviously love to to play for. them it'd be cool to play against them.

too because of the the big like they. just went and spent like 1.2 billion. dollars in free agency yeah like okay. this is the Juggernaut like let's go see. if we can take him down type of thing so. I could get up for either one of them. you. know mainly like I just I just want to I. want to play man I haven't. I I miss competing I'm yeah was it tough. to was there certain parts of the Season. that are tougher to watch like when it. gets in the playoffs or it's all just. kind of tough it's been tough to watch. baseball um because like I know I'm good.

enough to be out there and I I want to. be out there and I haven't I haven't had. the opportunity to to be out there um. when I was in Japan last year I watched. a lot of games because I was like okay. I'm I'm here I'm playing I'm like in it. I can respect what the other people are. doing I can learn from it I'm like. figuring things out and that was nice to. have some of that back where I just. haven't I don't think it's been healthy. for me to like consume MLB content the.

last couple years um which is sad. because like everything that I've tried. to build is like grow that entity and. like help build it and then um I'm still. involved in in doing that I'm still but. I'm just pursuing it a slightly. different way where I'm not even like. I'm not really watching games and. um I'd like to get back to a place where. like I can like watch and like be. interested in like appreciate the great. things that other people in the league. are doing I just had to like be a little.

bit protective of my of my uh Mental. Health on on that front but yeah because. would it just kind of it would just. break your heart probably yeah it was. tough man like seeing what other guys. are doing and not being able to be happy. for them feeling that resentment of like. well I should be out there being able to. compete too God um I don't like I. never I don't you should have been. there's no reason yeah I can't even.

imagine I don't like being negative. towards other people and like feeling. envious of other people's. accomplishments I like to look at things. and be like wow this person is really. really good and I can appreciate it. because I do it in all other sports like. I watch Brady play and I'm like I'm. going to watch as much of this as. possible because he's going to be gone. at some point and like you got to appre. apprciate what's what this is yeah same. with. s yeah um and and momes right now I do. that with and Kaylin Clark I want me and. Caleb Presley want to come to your um.

game at again uh so if we if you can. help us sorry I just had to say that out. loud dude love it m Pete that's what I. call it she's a I love watching her yeah. um but yeah man yeah it's I think. because if you if there was no there was. no criminal wrong there was nothing. wrong yeah there was nothing wrong yeah. um you can find things that if you look. at yourself yes I could adjust some of. these behaviors and stuff but as a human. being behaving in the world to not have.

done anything wrong yeah and to have. it's really just a trial that you've. been through it's almost like a. Scarlet Letter you know it was like a. Scarlet Letter in a way you know yeah. you get branded with something and then. you carry it I'll carry it the rest of. my life like I'll always be known for. this in some way and hopefully over time. it'll be less and I'll the positive. things that I do will get more attention. and be more synonymous with my brand but. like this will always be there um which.

is which is tough it's tough to I can't. even imagine I can't think about it too. much you know yeah yeah because it's. just such a it's such an anomaly yeah. you know um yeah so we got to get you we. gota we don't have to do anything I. can't do but it'd be awesome yeah. dude this come just like the I would. love to see you get to play with the. Padres too dude they got Benny Snell. over there don't they uh he's a free. agent right now I think they got darish. darish I love I love Musgrove yeah um.

they got a great team yeah and they just. got a new head coach on football too who. was it they got uh who the har the. Chargers got Harbaugh yeah from Michigan. they got har he might come out to a game. that would be cool go Blue got some I. got some friends that are big Michigan. fans so yeah oh they were all those. people were so geeked. recently they had a crazy season all the. adversity they went through as a team. like it's crazy when you watch that and. you're like okay like adversity either.

tears you apart or makes you so much. stronger like they really came together. and they put a they put together a hell. of a run what do you say like what do. you what are your thoughts cuz you're. almost relatable to like I mean it's. very scary like any somebody being like. in any sort of like. a public Persona or something or. popularity it's very scary right um man. God it's just but there's probably guys. who are imprisoned right now for things.

that they didn't do for sure like and. that's I try to keep that perspective. and. like yeah I'm noty this has sucked I'm. not trying to belittle what you went. through it could be way worse what what. but you're a person who was able to set. goals and set and really get through. like some of the tougher parts of Life. by your. own manifestations. and game planning yeah right it seems. like in your life how do you like what.

did you. do and because I'm sure there are guys. sitting in a Cell right now who can. might be able to learn some stuff yeah I. think one of the biggest things is. talking about it and that was one of the. toughest things I couldn't talk about it. publicly so having a having some someone. privately that you could just talk to. about it to at least hear yourself. vocalize what you're feeling like I if I. didn't have someone to talk to I would.

not have I would not have made it. through this um that's a huge thing like. it's scary to talk about things a lot of. times and like be viewed as vulnerable. or to be viewed you know you don't know. how the other person's going to view. your perspective but it's so important. uh so I'd say first thing like find. someone to talk to whether it's a. therapist whether it's a friend a family. member you know a lot of people aren't. fortunate enough to have family members. around to talk to or they don't have. those relationships but find someone. that you can talk to um and be honest.

with yeah like be able to just tell it. how you're feeling it yeah be honest. about you how you're feeling yes um. that's that's the biggest thing I'd say. and then having something some goal like. humans need a purpose like we don't do. well when we're like just existing for. and we don't have anything to do and if. you can find some purpose that's. controllable that like you know for me.

it was business like I had a business so. I woke up in the morning I'm like okay. how do we get this thing firing or how. do we get uh make a better video or how. do we edit this way or okay I got to. figure out the you know what higher do. we need to make so there was something. that I was in control of that I was. actively doing that I could distract. myself in a way from the negative stuff. and like focus on something that was. like aspirational like okay in the. future when all this stuff is done.

because it's going to be done at some. point it may be a day it might be a year. it might be 10 years it's not going to. last forever so at some point in the. future when it's done what is it that I. have that I've been building that I can. like Aspire what position do I want to. be when this is done like and can I make. progress towards that like that's how I. is like talking about it and having some. sort of aspirational goal that I was. chasing um but yeah like the support. group is is so big man yeah like just.

being able to vocalize your feelings is. important yeah oh yeah yeah I'm in a lot. of support groups dude yeah I mean. fortunately and unfortunately but some. of those moments are the best moments of. my life you know dealing with addiction. and learning about recovery and stuff um. it's given me some of the greatest Gifts. of my life which are great conversations. with people and learning how to be. around people and and feel and have and. and stuff like that I think the humans.

learn by failing first and then. adjusting behavior and then growing and. it's a sense of Pride to be able to feel. like you've gotten better at something. or you're a in a better place or a. better person because of something. but the moments where you're failing. you're when you're in that like those. are tough but being able to have that. comeback is so important because that's.

where you. feel that sense of accomplishment or. that sense of purpose or that you know. whatever it is you get something from. that if you never fail at anything like. life's just like there there's no. richness to it yeah you know um so I can. defin I can understand how some of those. moments like you fail at something you. end up in a bad place and you find a way. to like pull yourself back up and it. like feels a sense of Pride right yeah. yeah man it's interesting how much you. work with your own integrity and your. own like setting goals for yourself and.

it must be it seem like you have. probably a knowledge of yourself on a. unique level that that some people don't. get to have man and I think that's I. think being an introvert like I don't I. don't do well in the social situations. like we talked about so I spend a lot of. time thinking. and a lot of it's about external stuff. but I try to think internally too. and um try to figure out why a lot of. time like okay I did this thing like why. did I do that what prompted me to react.

this way emotionally to this situation. or what prompted me to go want to do. like why do I like cars or what what is. it right yeah and I'm trying to figure. out that puzzle because I'm a puzzle. yeah you're the puzzle and you're the. guy doing the puzzle that's what's kind. of cool once you realize that CU it can. make your life kind of richer in a way. yeah when you start to like not only am. I me but I'm. also um I can look at me yeah yeah and. it's a challenge because like you want. to look at.

yourself like very surface level like oh. yeah I'm good like I look good today I'm. in good shape like oh things are good. but when you start like digging. down like maybe I'm not good in this. area like how could it be better or like. I don't know if I like this part about. me is it bad is it good I don't know. know like how do I actually feel about. this maybe I want to like try to do this. a little bit better like those are those. are conversations I have with myself all. the time like interesting dude. bro you a strange dude I dig it though I.

dick it man I'm aware that I'm a. little different and I mean that. lovingly bro yeah I appreciate I really. read that respectfully we got to order. us a Trevor bow um bobblehead dude we. got to get one in here on the Shelf man. we want to dude I got I got some sitting. somewhere yeah yeah we're going to make. sure to hit up your um Rachel and make. sure she sends us over one even if she. has to drive it across country to get it. here we want it over here um we just. want to yeah we want to yeah man we just.

yeah I got some uh I think I have a. couple unreleased bobbleheads that uh so. I I was supposed to have a bobblehead. day with the Dodgers um and so they had. sent me some samples as we were like. designing it and then I got put on. administrative leave before it happened. and so they never ended up like. releasing the bobbleheads wow but they. had ordered like some stock cuz they. were going to do an in inst stadium. giveaway so I got my hands on a couple. of those that never actually been. released which uh I think will be a cool.

cool collector item so if you happen to. have one you want to part with or even. let us host in here for a while yeah. we're also willing to get one that has a. blank Jersey on and when you get your. new deal all right we're happy to uh to. get um to put that one Ino let me let me. see I got I got I got something for you. guys I just got a I haven't looked at. the inventory in a in a couple years but. I got something that'd be sweet man um. yeah dude yeah bro I wonder yeah dude. there's so many team how many teams are. there you could play for so many teams.

yeah we got 30 30 teams out there um bro. some of them are bad dude they need you. I'm not I mean some of these teams are. ding bad or they could be doing they. could you could maybe help yeah I think. I could I mean I don't think there's a. team out there that I wouldn't help in. some way right um. but I also you know seeing the other. side of things like there's a lot of uh. you know potential uh distractions PR. concerns um I don't think they're I.

don't think they would be as much as. people think they would be I think it'd. be like a couple days story and then. it'd be gone personally I I could be. wrong but um you think there would be. some Publications out there that would. feel like hey the best the least a way. that we could be supportive after you. know maybe lead the charge with not. being as supportive trying to even the. score you know yeah but I don't know. that's my thoughts yeah I mean it'd be. nice of course but um I'm not. gonna it's out of your control yeah if.

it happens it happens like mooki coming. out and saying some stuff publicly was. like a I would never ask him to do that. but it. so like it meant a lot to me M's my guy. I love that guy yeah dude he built a. house in Nashville yeah that's what I. heard anyway somebody somebody might Li. but I text him the other day he's like. I'm like what have you been up to Moo. he's like ah just out here bowling man. he likes to bowl I was like yeah he dude. he's a he like bowls 300s he like bowls. professionally in the offseason God some.

people get all the luck dude yeah have. you seen like he's he like he can dunk. he's like good basketball player great. baseball player bowler I'm like I think. he golfs like oh my god dude he's just. like he's one of those guys that just. like you put him in anything athletic. and he's just going to be one of the. best guys look at that wow look at him. look at him he's got the walk he's got. the SL he really does go back and look. at that walk look at mie Bing on this. strut this bro you see that little fist.

pump before before the like it's that. Curry like he knows when he let it go. that that's the one it's just built into. him it's built into him yeah dude he's. got it's a little bit of Tiger Woods. esque too almost kind of hey the fist. pump right there you could probably. overlay those and be that's did you guys. ever like have some games like uh is. mooki a card player would you guys do. stuff like uh D we had this debate one. day if you took the Dodgers position. players and they had to pitch and the.

Dodgers pitchers and they had to hit who. would win this should be a spring. training thing dude it should be always. thinking about this kind of stuff I was. I was like poking at him a little bit. I'm like dude we would dominate you guys. for sure you throw like 72 he's like. well you guys wouldn't be able to play. defense if we got one hit and we had. this like 40 45 minute discussion in the. clubhouse it was just like back and like. half the clubhouse was involved in it. it's like big argument it was great I I. hope at some point we get to we get to. test that out because it'd be a it'd be. fantastic content dude you're right yeah.

it's a great idea man uh I like the way. you think man I really do and I I just. I'm grateful to get to spend time with. you today man and um and we wish you the. best of luck man we're going to get that. bble hit in here and uh and we'll be. we'll be cheering you on bro I. appreciate that thanks for having me on. it's been great yeah that second S Young. baby that's right get in there Trevor. Bower guys thank you. [Music]. Trevor like these leaves I must be.

Cornerstone oh but when I reach that. ground I'll share this piece of mind I. found I can feel it in my. [Music]. bones.