Tim Dillon & Logan Paul | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #228

strike me as a person who found it. offensive. No, I I mean me and my friends played. with dead people, alive people, people. that were in the middle, but we just. didn't we couldn't get, you know, we. just couldn't get any we couldn't. monetize it cuz we were we were from the. generation that can't monetize. the sociopathy. But. shine. on me. I'll sit and tell you my story. Shine that light on me.

I'll sit and tell you my story. Honestly, your fa your face looks leaner. than the last time I saw you. I lost 5 lbs, dude. I I got a sinus. infection, though. Not a good 5 lb loss, though. I got a sin. You Can you hear my. my nose? I'm like congested. A sinus infection will make you lose 5. lbs. I've been sick for weeks. Literally. nothing. You've been sick? Well, no. I I've said I've been I've had.

sinus infections. I've never lost any. weight. I have no appetite. Wow. You don't look 100% well, honestly. Like you don't. Well, it's a key, though. You know, it's. I'm I'm transforming into something. else. Yeah. Takes a while. What are you transforming into? The next person I'll be. I don't know. That that remains to be. seen. I hope it's a cop. I don't know. It. could be somebody who sells insurance. I hope his name is Garrett. Yeah. I hope so too. I hope so too. Garrett, bro, dude, first of all, honestly, number one. name that I cannot It's just built into.

my system somehow. I can't react well. with it. People named Terry. Yeah. And especially if it's a man. I was going to say I I can get away with. the female Terry's. Guy Terry's I don't. know. Not so much. Yeah. It's just like it's a name you. give a kid when you want them to have a. hard life. Yeah. Hey, Terry. Little Terry. Yeah. We had a little guy named Terry by us. this little black fell, he would always. drink milk at the park, dude. And you. had no idea how he got it. And he was. always there. Dude, how's he doing now? I never seen him. It's a great question.

That's something to be said. Right. Yeah. This is 26 years ago, dude. And. we're always like, "Where are your. parents?" You know, and he didn't even. know. No. Yeah. It's almost like he was just born like. in a bird bath or something, but who. knows? New Orleans legend. Uh, what are you training for? So, you're train are you actually training. for this fight? I know you So, you just. you just did a fight, Logan. Yeah, I had a fight last year, August. 25th. And then uh yeah, another another. one this year, November 9th. Same same. kid. It's the rematch round two. So uh. professional fight, no headgear, Staple. Center. It's going to be sick, man. And you guys think you'll sell it out?

I think so. Wow. I think so. That's crazy. It's a big fight. The whole the whole. undercard is professional fights. Yeah, it's the first It's like your. first professional fight. Yeah. Oh, really? Yeah. I'm undefeated. I'm undefeated so. far. I'm 0 and one, bro. And you probably beat your brother's ass. for years, too, didn't you? Uh we stopped because we both got Have. you met him? Yeah, man. He's big, dude. Like the. kid's a thick little Oreo. Yeah. So So. we we had to stop fighting cuz we. destroy everything, you know, in the. house. When both the brothers get so big. that they'll destroy everything in the.

house. Yeah. Chairs, tables, glass. Uh so we stopped. So it's been a minute. since I was. And he's got a little bit of flint stone. in him, too. A little more than. He really does, man. You know, he's got that I noticed. And. you I couldn't tell if he was like 19 or. like 38, you know. It could go either way. Yeah. The hair. doesn't give it away. Well, I mean, it's. just kind of like. just like the high and tight for years. now, but I think he I don't know what it was. He just has he reminds me of every guy. who owns like a nice boat in Florida. That's what he reminded me of. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wasn't there a thing where he was going. to fight someone, too? You were going to.

do it. And wasn't your dad going to. fight somebody? So, we [ __ ] yeah, dude. Dude, the whole. family was going to fight. Dude, I hope. your dad fights that older black guy. He's like a uh he's a politician, but. he's like from He can't even talk. And. everybody's like, "He's the best." And. he's like, exactly who his dad was going to fight. Very. It's a good guess. I want my dad to fight Jesse Smlet. I. think that'd be a good fight. That would be great. You know what I'm. saying? That would be great. Me and GP and Jesse Smlet just. Dude, that would be phenomenal.

Your dad would probably take care of. that. He would be I mean, dude, who knows? Go on his Instagram. You'll see. All. this man does is is chop wood and tie. tomahawks to his motorcycle. Yeah, that's all. Does he smlet? No, not. my dad. He flips tires. He chops wood. and he ties tomahawks to his beam. Here's the thing, though. If Jesse. Smalllet beat your dad, you'd have to. kill your father. I Oh, yeah. Oh, you couldn't ever look at your. father. No, I know that. it couldn't. You know, there's no. Christmas is over. Everything's done if. Jesse wins.

Yeah, that's wild. It's uh that Jesse. Smalllet. I can't believe if he fought. your dad. Yeah, I think uh. Well, like historically, he's not so. good at defending himself. Right. Right. That's true. Right. Yeah. Oh, yeah. your dad would I think I honestly. dude I have no idea what your dad even. look like. and I think he would beat him. Yeah, I agree. Yeah, but a lot of I'm afraid of his dad. I. don't know his dad, but I'm afraid. most people are dude. I'm afraid a guy that would raise you. and your brother I think has got to be. insane who will kill someone, you know,

and I appreciate that. It's definitely a property owner. Yeah, it's a real deal guy. Yes. You know, that's a real deal guy. That's. not a guy That's not a music teacher. didn't bring up these two boys. You know. what I mean? This is a guy that like. smacked you around a little bit, made you go out and light the world on. fire. Yeah. This ain't a guy that owns a bunch. of cologne. No. No. This guy's not. There was No. He. didn't read poetry before dinner, you. know. This is a guy that got into it, you know. Yeah. This guy who I. And mom is probably also somewhat. taught, right? No. Mom's a sweet hug.

Oh, mom's sweet. Mom's the exact. opposite. So, mom goes the other way. She's like a. sweet Okay. If you even look at his mom, you hear an. oven door opening. Cuz they also could have been raised by. like a Long Island mom. That's I could. also see that like a tough Long Island. [ __ ]. Sweetheart. And you guys are from where? Ohio. Ohio. Yeah. Um Ohio. Did you Were you friends with uh Roman. Atwood? I was. I I am. Yeah. Yeah. I still am. Yeah. Yeah. Roman. Have you met him? Yeah. Yeah. Roman's awesome. Yeah. Super cool guy. Down to earth. He's a special dude, man. He's really. cool. Um, dude, actually think speaking.

of fight, they had a thing when I was. young called, and this is, you know, [ __ ]. fist fights was a thing. And it would. come to colleges when I was in college. and they would, it would be two gay men. and this lesbian lady and you'd go watch. them and they would fist fight. See, college used to be so much fun. Yeah. You know, before now, all this PC [ __ ]. now everything's soft. Yeah. That used. to be great. Imagine trying to do that. now. It's called [ __ ] fighting. And uh, we. have two gay guys and it's the first. blood. So, the first first AIDS blood.

splatter, we're done. Then we're done. with the fight. That would be rough now. to get away. Yo yo, I'm going to get cancelled just. from being on this. Yeah. Yeah, you will be cancelled. That's what we're trying. Watch me say no words and I'm I'm the. one that gets bad. Well, you can't be you're above. cancellation. So, apparently it doesn't ex exist. Cancellation doesn't exist. Yeah, it's. over. Well, here's the thing, though. That's. the thing. They've been trying to cancel Trump. Yeah. How'd that work out for you? He's about to get picked up for four. more years. Four more seasons. But isn't it crazy though when you think.

like the one of the the president was a. real I mean also he was a businessman. right and a shady businessman I think. like I'm not I'm not anti-Trump like a. lot of crazy people are like I don't. give a [ __ ] that you know I live my life. I don't the government doesn't determine. everything you know but he's a reality. star was a reality star president and. she's like the biggest pop sensation. it's just it's all starting to kind of. blend together. yeah I think a Kardashian will be the. governor of California. I'm not even. kidding, though. I mean, I think I think.

you you see what Kim is doing right now, right, with the prison reform and stuff. I. think it's going in that direction. And. I got to be honest with you, I don't I'm. not mad at it. Yeah. I'm I'm ready for the new world. You know who would be a sick governor is. Chris. Chris Jenner. Yeah. She a bad [ __ ]. Oh, that's. We got 50 years left on the planet. Why. not have fun? Yeah. Yeah. Why not have fun? Oh, wait. Hold up. That's it? Probably. It's going to get rough after. 50. Yeah. It's going to get hot. We're. saying literally, we're saying literally. Chris Jenner as a good option. And I. agree with you. It's going to get rough.

for Christmas. People are are going to. be getting shields. Yeah, it's going to be tough. I mean, there's a lot of tents. There's a lot of tents. A lot of tents, you know, but also I. think in California, like you go to the. rest of America, everybody's really kind. of just enjoy, you know, things are. going pretty cool. I feel like out here. there's this spiderweb, like. everything's falling apart. Like like. Yeah. Yeah. You do a fist fighting like. that, a gay fist fighting at bars, dude. I'm from people would go see it, have a. blast. Yahoo would make an article about. it, but nobody really [ __ ] I don't.

think is wa is watching that [ __ ]. anymore. Certainly not Yahoo or reading. Yes, but I don't think anybody's even reading. these websites. Do you got you feel like. nobody cares. the mainstream stuff? Nobody cared about Chappelle where. there's three people mad at Chappelle's. and then everybody's debating it. It's. like no, nobody cared. No, it's the it's Yeah. The minority. becomes the majority somehow. Somehow. because of like the amplification of. social media. Yeah, it sucks. But I. don't think it's Do you feel like it's. that effect? I I feel like it it really. kind of falls on deaf ears. It's like. I think it's the worst thing now is if. people aren't mad at you,

right? Like the worst thing now is if people if. you're not controversial, it's almost. like you're done. The opposite of love is not hate. It's. indifference. Yeah. Which is which is it? That's a great quote. Apathy. Apathy, dude. Like, yo, imagine. imagine like truly no one gave a [ __ ]. about you. 100%. At least you make them feel something. They don't. I try to get attention all the time. I. tweet everything. And you I just tweet. out. Are you are you that. all all Well, I mean I I tweet out. things hoping to, you know, you know, to. get something and no one cares. It's. like that's okay. You ever rile anyone up? Sometimes people get mad.

People are caring more now though. Getting bigger. Yeah. It's It's been better now. Last. six months, you know. I had to really. turn it up, you know, say Megan McCain. [ __ ] her dad. I had to take it to the. next level. Oh yeah. Yeah. And then people were like, "Oh, okay. We'll listen to this.". And incest will get people to move. Yeah. I I had to say she had sex with. her father's corpse. And then people. like, "Oh, okay." But in here's the. thing about incest, dude. Everybody's. like, "Ah, no." No. Right. Yeah. But what I'm thinking about is um dude, back in the day, you didn't have the. only people that lived around you were. kind of family or somebody that was, you.

know, Yeah. close. And you didn't have everyone didn't have. a bicycle or like if you had a bicycle, then yeah, maybe you'd [ __ ] somebody. that wasn't distantly related to you. But if you didn't, you could only have. sex with as far as you could walk or as. far as you could. Yeah. You know, so you would people would have. sex more locally. Yeah. You didn't have a choice. I think. that still goes on. I think that's still. probably happening. Oh, yeah. There's some areas and stuff. you go and you're like, "Oh, everybody.". I think people are using that exact. rationale, too, when they're in court. They're like, "Listen, I I have sex as. far as I walk." And then there's a judge.

going, "Okay, sounds great.". Bet. Yeah. Yeah. I only have one bike. I can't get anywhere. I don't have Uber. Yeah. I got a skateboard. I got a skateboard. But I just think back in the day and. then at a certain point they're like, "Look, you got to get some exercise. You're going to have to. you have to walk. Well, now because of. Uber, because of birds, like I don't. want to hear any excuses about you not. being able to travel, you know, five. plus miles. They got birds in lime, scooters lying around every corner. You should be You should be able to [ __ ]. like, you know, not your siblings. Yeah. Yeah. Or not like unless you want.

to. I feel like that's a whole another. problem. That's a whole another problem. But it. shouldn't be transportation. I would never want to, man. I thought. maybe my sister was cute for like a 6. months, you know, but. it's a both children. a decent amount of. time. What age? What age were you? We were kids. Yeah. No, she was like. nine and I think I was like 13 or. something, but I didn't think she was. like hot and such. Oh, that's a cute kid. that lives at our house, you know? Right. Um, which is good. That's. But anyway, what about the So, the fight.

So, this is going to be a real So, will. this fight go on to some like W like. like sanctioned card or what is that. like? Yeah, man. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, yeah. It's it's legit, man. Eddie. Hearn's promoting it. He's the He's the. He's one of the biggest boxing promoters. in the world, if not the biggest. It's going to be on the Done app. Um. D Azn, right? Yeah. Shameless plug. The Zone app. Uh. but yeah, bro, it's going to be [ __ ]. crazy. A little throw a little one, two, one, two action. Three, four action. What'll be different about this fight. than the first one that you did? And I. didn't see the first one. I know it was.

like it had a million streams. I know. that. A million stream two two million. pirated, by the way. Crazy. Like lost $20 million in one night. 20. million plus in one night. Isn't that crazy? [ __ ] sucks, dude. Sucks. Uh, and were. you getting paid on buys and stuff or is. that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We were getting paid. on buys. No flat fee because we did it. through YouTube and now the zone we have. the zone bought the fight. They bought. the rights to the fight. Um, the. difference this time is like, yo, last. time I I went in as a YouTuber who had. to learn how to box in like three or. four months. That's Boxing is hard. Boxing is not a sport you can just walk.

into and rely on your athleticism to to. make you do well, which I which I did. and I did okay. But um for the whole the. past year I've been training like. uh pretty rig rigorously. So and so this. time I'm I'm actually I would consider. myself a fully fed vetted boxer. Well yeah cuz your energy even felt. different even when you came in here and. when I went on uh Impulsive. Oh yeah. I was it just seemed like you had I was. like oh wow this guy looks a little bit. leaner a little more you just seemed a. little bit like more of an athlete I.

think in a way. Oh really? For real. I thought you had a. serious energy. You weren't goof I. thought you'd be goofier. Yes. until you walk in with like a goofy. energy. wild energy. You went in and like looked. down like like Rocky like you're ready. I'm I mean I'm focused right now. Also, boys, I'm I'm [ __ ] sick. I am on the. cusp of death. Okay. No, like I'm I'm I'm ill right. now. Fine, though. You sure? Cuz my face feels red and my. like. But also, yeah, he's I've been on the bus. I've Yeah, I've seen some real corpses. But you He.

looks good. He seems fine. You wouldn't. think he's sick. I I mean I think I would I've seen you. know I people I I think you don't look. sick. Yeah. I think you look like a guy. who maybe you know I think if you didn't. sleep for a maybe a night or two you'd. look like a guy who is probably doing a. lot of drugs probably. What's the training regimen like? What. are you doing every day? I want to get. inspired. I want a training regimen that. I can. Are you working out by the way or just. Well, it depends. Uh it depend. You tell. me what working out is. You tell me what. working out is and then I'll tell you.

what I'm doing. You mean using a CPAP machine? Yeah. What do you mean by working out? Do you mean going to the doctor? Um, yes. But no. Uh, so what do you do? What's your regimen? And I'll tell you. my regimen. We train twice a day. Okay. So already I'm not doing that. I. don't do that. I don't believe in twice. a day. But that's the way you want to do. it is fine. It's a bit above average. So. yeah, twice a day to me is a little. much. So yeah, you you just took the. lead. Yeah, you just took the lead. Oh, but what about you? I see you got. you got. I went to I went Yeah, I'm going some. training this morning. I just I see a. trainer now. So, three days a week. And.

I just hired a yoga trainer as well. Are you Are you [ __ ] with yoga? So, I'm gonna do that. Yeah. A yoga. trainer. What the What is that? Somebody who. motivates you to do yoga. It's basically like a sculptor, basically. But like insane. You get into a bad position or they just. sculpt you into a better just some. middle-aged lonely woman who's like. Theo, it's time. I hope so. Yeah, it's time. Oh. Oh, you haven't Oh, you haven't. trained with a yoga trainer yet? No, no, no. She's going to come next. week. So, cuz they're normally yoga instructors. Yeah, I've never heard of a yoga trainer. like a hype woman to get you really into. it. Well, dude, if I flip my dog well,

she gives me like a little bacon or. something like that. So, I think that's a thing. Just make sure you roll out of bed. excited, too. Uh, but no, I go, but I just don't do it. as much as I used to, but I know that. when I do, I feel better. So, I'm trying. to get it more into my life. Do you meditate? Yeah, people around. I got to start. doing that. Hey. Hey, where you from again? I'm from Louisiana. What do What do your parents think about. the meditation? Um, my mother really believes in it and. my father's deceased, so he probably. tries to contact me through it, I guess. Yeah. But I don't know. or he still thinks. it's gay. He probably still could,

you know? He's like, I I still don't. support this, dude. When I was young, a lot of stuff. was pretty gay, bro. You know what I. mean? Even Jingle Bell, he's like, "What is Are you sitting on a. dick, Theo?" He's just upset somewhere. in heaven. He wouldn't think all of that, dude. Oh, what is the regimen? I want to I want to. hear this. You wake up. Yeah, we wake up. We run. We box. How long do you hold on a second? Hold. on, Tim. Who is we? Me and my bro. Oh, your brother's So, your brother's right there with you the. whole time. sometimes. He wasn't He wasn't today, but most of the time. Yeah.

And is that did Is that just a. commitment you guys made? Is it. Um I think he's going to fight on the. undercard. I think he's going to fight. on the undercard and he he uh he he. enjoys boxing just like me. Like. you you hired a yoga trainer and a. personal trainer, right? To me, boxing is just as effective. workoutwise and it's a practical skill. Like I don't I don't like picking up. weights. I haven't picked up a weight in. two two three years. Uh just like yeah, you look good, you sculpt yourself, you. feel good, but boxing, not only does all. that happen, but like you know like but.

also good skill, you can beat someone's. ass. You might have to attack someone. Well, I mean, who knows? Somebody might say something you don't. like. You might have to attack them in a. club or a restaurant. I'll never attack. I'll never attack. I'll antagonize. Hey, hey, listen. You. know, who knows? Whatever happens. happens. I'm just saying good skill to. have. Okay. So, you might get traffic. Do you have a trainer, too, or not? I do. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. His name is. Milton. Uh yeah. And so you guys go out with him. and you guys are doing. and then you guys hit the ring. Are you. hitting the ring? I know you have a. boxing ring at home. Boxing ring in my backyard. You seen. that? I saw that. Seen it. So you're hitting that every.

day. Every day. Wow. So five mile run. We out here. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We do we. do about three three four right now. But. we'll get up to the five mile. We're two. months out. You know, so if you if you. peak now, we're [ __ ]. Yeah. You know, you got to like you got to. train it. Get the uh get the spurts of. uh exerting yourself. And are you guys blowing a lot of gas at. each other? talking a lot of [ __ ] you. and the other guy. It just got anni dude. It just got. announced uh yesterday. Oh, wow. So, we hadn't we haven't really had a. chance to like. to do it, man. I wish I could I wish I. could use your wit. Like, I'm going to.

I'm going to actually channel you, Theo, because I feel like I' I'd be able to. hurl a lot of good insults. Just like, do you guys not like each other? Is it. like one of those things? No, I hate the kid. Really? Yeah. Yeah, it's. And he's he's a black kid from England. That's not why I hate him. No, no, no. I know. I'm not saying. I see No, I see what you're doing. Yeah. So, you're fighting for the white. race. trickery for this. Okay. Well, what's his name? He's a He's like. the biggest YouTube guy in England, right? Is he? He's Yeah. Oh, he is. Yeah, he's Yeah, I think so. Oh, okay. I didn't know. I never seen. him. I know his name's KR1.

That's right. Yeah. No one No, I mean, I'm going to be. honest. If you're in America, like you. don't know who the kid is. We don't. Well, here's the thing. First of all, if. we like if we wanted to be in Britain so. bad, we'd have stayed over there, dude. I'm saying we our our ancestors made. here's how bad it was going. We got into. a boat, left there. People were like, "Where are you going?" And we're like, "We don't even [ __ ] know, bro. But we're leaving. We're out.". That's Imagine it being that bad. It's gone. You don't have enough gas to get there. And you like, "Yeah, we'll [ __ ] We'll. see what the Lord wants. We'll figure it.

out. We got this. We got this barrel of. pepper. That's all we need. We got some spices. and we're good to go.". Man, those pilgrims were nutty, huh? So, this is So, this is uh was the first. bout here in in the US as well? No, it was in it was in Manchester. Oh, so now now LA Staple Center home. advantage. That's what I'm saying. Do you feel like the first one it was a. draw? It was a draw. It was a tie, man. Yeah, it sucked. Do you feel like it was a. tie? Nah, I feel like I won. Looks like a tough dude. He looks like a. guy. He looks a formidable opponent.

Is it his picture behind me? Yeah, I think so. Yeah, unless that's. just another guy. What the [ __ ] You I mean, bro, KS1, look at his face. Logan, how you how you going to take that. serious? Yeah, I would if I saw him in an alley, I. would take it seriously. You know what I. mean? And that's just because if I saw. him in an alley, I would be somewhat. threatened. But how many men have you met in alleys? A lot. But it's usually it's a lot. It's. usually a text first, you know? So to. just from out of nowhere, if I just saw. those dreadlocks, it looks like a. tarantula. And.

dude, I think. it does. It does. Those locks don't have that much dread. in them. I think this is the toughest. this guy looks. Is this. kind of look like white girl dreadlocks? to mess to me that this is what that. picture the photographer was like, "Okay, now scrunch your face and look. tough." And that's what happened. I've seen tougher black women at a bus. stop in Baltimore. That's what I'm saying. Yeah, absolutely. That's the next fight. You just fight. black women at a bus stop in Baltimore. Dude, I saw this lady one time. Sponsored by Popeye's new chicken. sandwich. I saw this lady drinking a whole. six-pack of baby formula.

Oh, yeah. There's got to be some sort of. nutritional benefits that we don't know. about. But where's the baby dog? I don't know, man. That's crazy. But by. the way, that makes me think, how good. is formula? That's what I'm saying. That's the other thing. Is that just. like Nestle Quick? Yeah. Yeah. Potential in the formula. So that's the guy right there, KS1, man. And so do you feel like he's going to be. training as hard as you? Do you feel. like he's taking it as serious? Oh, yeah. You do? Oh, yeah. This is This is a huge I'm not. I'm not going to lie, man's a dog. Man's. a dog. Give it to him. Like, yeah, man's.

got heart. He works hard. I work It's. It's sick. It's sick. I want to fight somebody now. Do you though? Cuz this [ __ ] is. rigorous, man. And it's violent. You know how many times, like how many. times you get hit in the head before you. realize, oh [ __ ] this is going to have some. long-term repercussions. Wow. So, you're saying you even noticed. that just from that fight? I spell two. Sometimes like, oh, you. two. I spell it sometimes. T O WO. How did you spell it before you got hit. correctly? T O2. Right. Like two people.

like I notice that my my my little my. text sometimes I misspell a word and I'm. like [ __ ] it's got to be boxing. Damn. I'm 24, bro. I'm I'mma be I'm gonna come. back here in 6 years. Yeah. I'm going to be in a wheelchair. Do you. be wheelchair racing? They give like. chance. It's called punch drunk. I I'll be punch. drunk. Yeah. I don't want to be in a wheelchair. And they do have that, man. Yeah. Sometimes uh. sometimes you see some of these guys and. they're not all there a little bit. Of course. Of course. So, you're saying. you really noticed that just from from. that one from that bout?

I don't know what else it could be from. Man, I love I was in the spelling bee. Like, why am I misspelling simple words? What? How far did you get in the. spelling? I was eliminated the first round. Okay. So, hold on. So, technically, we. were all in the spelling. We had It was. mandatory. We had to do it. You know what word I misspelled? It was. kettle. Oh, give it a shot. Uh. K E T L E. [ __ ] you, bro. Yeah. Yeah. I. I I said I sell E e L. Oh, that's crazy. Well, there was this kid named It was. this kid in my in my grade.

I would still rather have your life, but. I did spell kettle. You know what I. mean? I'd still rather leave as you if. that means anything. Shout out to this girl, bro, named Big. Helina, dude. We had this girl fifth. grade spelling me. I lost a girl named. Big Helina who honestly No, I'm not. joking, Tim. Think you're handsome, but. she looked just like you, bro. First of all, she was pregnant. Good for her. Wo. In in fifth grade? No. At 10. 100% pregnant. Dude, you grew up in the. best place. They checked as much as possible. 100%. pregnant and I lost on the word. inconvenience and she won the [ __ ]. spelling be. Yeah, cuz she knows all about an.

inconvenience and she knows all about. that. And quit school the year after. When you give birth to your uncle's baby. in sixth grade in Hington, wherever. Louisiana, it's an inconvenience. I mean, yeah, she definitely So, she had. insider trading, I think, when it came. to. But that's crazy though that she beat. me. I remember losing and this [ __ ] hurt. me a little bit, but I was a good. speller too, man. Good speller. Yeah. You said you like words on our. podcast. You see, you love words. How often you find yourself just reading. the good old dictionary? I got a actually a really cool rhyming. dictionary. A friend of mine gave me. He.

died, but he gave it to me. Like a like a dictionary that one word. will rhyme with the other word. Yeah. It's like every word that'll rhyme. like that, you know? But it was written. about maybe 20 years ago, so they don't. have like a lot of new words in there. But you're not doing hip-hop. Nuh-uh. It's not for hip-hop. just like. making your brain think like where you. could connect stuff, you know, that you. might not know. That's interesting. Yeah. Um, so is there something different. you'll do for this second fight? I'm. really curious about this because it's. uh. I just can't imagine getting to a.

a beef space and com I would love to see. it though where it's like. are there beefs? Are there real I know. there are beefs behind the scenes, but. do we have are there like public beefs. that ever get to the level of. I think Mana Scalco and Andrew Dice Clay. that was getting wild. Yeah, Dice was. talking. Oh, that'd be cool. That'd be cool. It'd be great to see that fight. I'm. trying to think. I think more I think more celebrities. should fight. Yeah. Like, how cool is that? Well, that but I think it's all starting. to merge, man. It's all starting to come. together. Like, you know, it's like like reality stars.

are. presidents. are presidents. Reality stars are the. number one pop star in America, in the. world. She was on, you know, hip-hop. Love and hip-hop. And no disrespect to. her at all, but I'm just saying it's. like it's all it's all merging into that. one very somewhat scary thing. Yeah. So it's like you could be fighting. Vladimir Putin in four years. I heard that man's a dog, dude. Yo, you know he like he like rides he. rides bears. He does cold plunges. He. does a lot of cold. He's the biggest guy.

on YouTube in Russia. Yeah. Vladimir Putin number one. That's unbelievable. Number one YouTube guy. So yeah. So if it makes sense that you. guys went at it. Yeah. Who knows? You know how you fight. the top YouTube store in every country. Like you go to Pakistan, whoever it is, you [ __ ] them up. Whoop their ass. There's. probably some chick. smacker. Move on. Fight the next person. I want to fight I want to fight. McGregor, dude. Do you? I want to get I want to get my face. [ __ ] by McGregor. You know what I. mean? I bet in two years you could beat him.

He's only getting older and his whiskey. is only getting shittier. Yeah. And I'm. young and sprry. And he also I think it seemed like he. might be on a little bit of that dust. You feel me? Yeah. That's why he's punching old men. You see that? Yeah. Yeah. Just punching old men in there. Everybody wants to [ __ ] hit an old. man. Everybody wants to hit an elderly. person. I've always said that. Irish. Hello, dude. Walking into a pub, punching a senior citizen cuz they're. wise. Cuz they think they're not going. to get hit. Elderly people are always. popping off, saying [ __ ] cuz you can't. hit them. Taking their teeth out and setting them. on the counter. Bro,

they know what they're doing. If that ain't a sign of disrespect, I'm. going to take part of my body off and. set it in front. Put it on the table while you're having. a sandwich. Disgusting. They're asking. for it. Yeah. I just I just fear their egos are maybe. too big. Like their egos are like what. it what it was at 20. Yeah. You know, and then they never escaped it. and then their body doesn't move as fast. and they think. you're getting you're getting hit in the. head by an MMA champ. That's it. Yeah. Just getting attacked. But yeah, I wonder like if in if in a. couple years you'll have like if it's. all just starting to merge together like.

Yeah. You'll be you'll be fighting. whoever. I love the idea of having you. two stars from around the globe fight. each I think so, too. It's like a death. match. Yeah. Well, dude, if Trump and Biden are the. nomine, like obviously Trump is, but if. Biden's the nominee, they have talked so. much [ __ ] about fighting each other. and they're going to be on. Oh, I did see that. Yeah. So, you wonder they're going to be. standing at podiums debating. So, could this be the first [ __ ]. presidential throwdown? Did y'all see um.

Did y'all see the Bernie Sanders and Joe. Rogan? Did you guys see a little bit? Yeah, dude. How it was like the greatest I. mean it just like you learned so much. about Bernie in like a in a heartbeat. I think it changed I think it really. changed the whole landscape of what. podcast can be now. That that one interview for me I was. like holy [ __ ]. Joe does that a lot though. Yeah. But to I just never I don't know for. some reason that one really landed for. me. Yeah. I was like what? Well yeah cuz Bernie's a guy that you. got to listen to for a while. right. And everybody usually is, unless.

they're just like a just some flapjack. that's out there just right, you know, slinging dope little. oneliners. Yeah, his Tulsi interview was good, too. Who told Yeah. Tls story came on? Uh. Tulsi Gabbard from Hawaii. She was good. You didn't like it? Not for you, dude. I look man, she's from Hawaii, so I don't think she. should be the president. Yeah, I say look, man. Nobody's Why not? Cuz Hawaii's a barbecue pit and we're. not going to elect somebody who knows. nothing about the world. Wait, but hold up. Hold up. sitting on. is from Hawaii. And he he talked about.

being the president. That's true. But I I don't if you're. living in Hawaii, you're escaping. You. don't know what to do with Detroit. You're living in Hawaii. You're watching. surfers all day. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. You don't know what the hell's. going on in Chicago. You don't have a clean look. Let's get a. question came in here right now from uh. from someone. Let's get this hitter. It's Kyrie from Rhode Island. And my. question is for Theo, and it's after. having both Crystal Leia and Logan Paul. in the pod. I know there's some beef. between the two. Who do you think takes. it in a fist fight here? Gang gang.

What do I think there's beef? I think. there's probably, you know, soy chorizo. Um, no. I think. I think you would beat him. I think if. if it's fist fighting, I think that. Logan would win. I think if it's. tickling somebody from far away with. their feet, then Chris would win. Yeah. He's lengthy. Both worthwhile things, bro. He can literally, no joke, from. right here, [ __ ] put his foot out, bro. Yeah. And [ __ ] wait, but saying, dude. Yeah, I wouldn't give it to Chris.

Hold on. I wouldn't give it to Chris right away, bro. No endangered species on the table, bro. But that hit her down. No, no, it's [ __ ]. A grizzly bear was killed to make those. two shoes. Two bears, a mother and a. father. Him and Jake strangled them both. to death and then made those shoes. Don't come after me. Go after Gucci. Right. Go after Gucci. Gucci's fault. It's unbelievable the animals that they. must have. Are you and Chris Cool now? Uh, yeah, we are. Yeah, we are. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, yo, I would that that whole. period of my life was just like just. pure [ __ ] Like I I've watched some.

footage of myself like at that time when. I do you remember the tweet when I. tweeted at Chris and I was like. I was like uh like now I know why your. comedy career is dying and he said like. uh at least when my career dies you can. film it and put it on YouTube like like. grand slam, bro. [ __ ] that. I mean. he's really. I walked into it. What am I I'm a [ __ ]. Yeah. But that whole life like man I hated. myself. Did you though? I hated myself.

Wow. I hate I hated myself that like looking. back now. Looking back now. Yeah. At the time I was like this is. dope. Yeah. I'm a YouTube star. And now I'm just like [ __ ]. You just acting out. I don't Yeah, I think so. I think I was. just lashing. I was I was pissed that. everyone hated me. Everyone was pissed. at me. Yeah. You doing the crazy pranks. Have you ever done one of those where. you regretted it? Like a crazy prank? Well, obviously the one that we all know. about. The one in the forest. Yeah, right. That one. Which I didn't. even think was offensive. I was like, whatever. I don't think. you strike me as a person who found it.

offensive. No, I I mean, me and my friends played. with dead people, alive people, people. that were in the middle, but we just. didn't we couldn't get, you know, we. just couldn't get any. We couldn't. monetize it because we were we were from. the generation that can't monetize. the sociopathy. I I wish we No, but that. wasn't that wasn't But have you ever. done something where you're like, "Oh, I. shouldn't have.". Yeah, man. I I poured gasoline on my brother. Uh I. tried to pour gasoline on my brother. He. ran away and I slipped in it and almost. broke my shoulder. Dude, my boy Todd one time at Halloween,

drank a [ __ ] half gallon of gasoline, dude. And no joke, we never [ __ ] saw. him again. Yeah. And guess what? He's probably fine. Oh, I think he's fine, but I think he's. never going to be fully fine, you know? Interesting. Like I think he can get a. job, but I don't think he can get like. uh promoted. Yeah. No, he's not going to get to the. manager of Perkins. Let's say this, dude. Uh. he's going to be. He ain't going out on Halloween anymore, I don't think. He's staying at home and passing out.

candy, probably. So, dude, was he dared to do it or was. he one of those kids? We've been doing some mushrooms, dude. And we [ __ ] hit the gas station. You. if you're on mushrooms and you there's. nowhere to go, do you go to a gas. station, bro? And that place is [ __ ]. like. that seems like the least appealing. place to be on mushrooms. And they had a bunch of roaches. A whole. [ __ ] swarm of roaches had just hit. our area. And so there was like probably. 600 roaches at this gas station. I love how in your area you take. mushrooms, but you realize life is. worse. Like you don't have you don't. have that enlightened experience. Like. let's go to the gas station where we're.

all going to work in 3 years. Let's It's. like what a nightmare. Hey, let's go to. the beach and realize we're all one. consciousness. No, let's go to the. mobile and see where exactly we're. headed. So, let's see how many uh Tootsie Rolls we. can put in our mouths. What a nightmare. It was amazing, man. But it was amazing. But he he didn't seem like kind of guy. was going to do super great overall. Anyway, you So, in this podcast so far, you've. mentioned three friends that have kind. of just disappeared. Why is that a thing in Louisiana? Like, where are your friends going? It's easy place. I mean, it's a place.

there's a lot of, you know, not Goldman Sachs. That's not where. they're going, bro. They're going into the ether, man. They're part of the mystery, you know. The falling off the face of the earth. It's a flat earth. It has a place that has just a lot of. mystery. They all become Netflix documentaries. Yeah. You know, dude, what do you think? Uh what did you. ask him a second ago? There was. something I wanted to talk more about. that. It was a good question. I forgot. Yeah. He was talking about Crystalia beef. Oh, yeah. Crystalia beef. Do you uh. Yeah, but Crystal Lee, I think, is more of an. online beef person than he is a real. human in life beef person.

He's a nice guy. Sweet guy. Yeah. I feel. like I'd like to believe that most. people are. I mean, I can't I don't know. how many people. I got I got real beef with other than. that one kid, right? You know, the British guy. Yeah, the British guy. Yeah. I mean, where does that come from that beef? Is. that just talking [ __ ] You guys are. both online. Yeah. So, it was it started off cool and. then it during the press conferences and. [ __ ] it just it just he crossed the. line, I crossed the line, and it just. got super toxic and unhealthy and now. here we are. We want to [ __ ] rip each. other's heads off. It's dope. It's. great. And some of it's kind of healthy, man.

You know, like one of my friends is. fighting this weekend in the um which in. the UFC Porier. against Kabib the Eagle. Oh [ __ ] Fight, dude. Your boy might get rocked, dude. But yeah, but he's a diamond, bro. So, you know, um he already is, I think, legally a rock. Um but. but yeah, I mean, anybody could win, you. know? They got to fight, right? I mean, Khabib is is a is a rare specimen. No, he's not even a human. It's really crazy watching him. It's. almost like watching one of those things. that they put into a scary movie that.

just goes up the wall. That's him, dude. Yeah. And his arms go behind like this. It's very cross back, bro. He can put, bro, he [ __ ] can put. both of He can take his arms off, dude, and swallow him in [ __ ] arm. wrestling. He's terrifying. Yeah, he's a terrifying. dude. He's uh But anyway, but yeah, you see. these guys like, "Yeah, I want to beat. the [ __ ] out of that guy." And it's like. it's playful, but it's also like this is. what we're doing now. Do you feel like. this is so this is something you're. doing now? As far as like fighting. people, I think so. I mean, yeah.

Are you gonna do you think you're gonna. continue this? And. I think so. Wow. I think it's just. Do you think you become a boxer? Like a. legit. No, I'm going to do MMA. I I wrestled in. high school and I was good. I I placed a. fifth in Ohio. So, like I So, that a lot. of that is there. Yeah. Right. Yeah. I boxing is is a little limiting. for me. Are any of the other YouTube guys or. social media guys doing stuff like this? No. And I'll tell you why. Well, they're [ __ ] They're 100 times. smarter than me. Yo, think about it. I. mean, [ __ ] Combat sports are dangerous.

This is not healthy. Getting hit in the. head over and over again, right? What am I some kind of [ __ ] The answer. is yes. Like I I I'd like to believe. that everyone else is it's a combination. of they're they're smarter and it's not. worth it and they probably don't want to. work that hard cuz it is hard work, right? You know, I got like something's. some screws are missing. It's a legit sport. It's not just. beating somebody up. It's a legit sport. We have to train. Yeah. And you're going to lo like um do. you feel like you're going to kind of. create a new fan base with some of this. too? Like. Oh, for sure. Oh, for sure. That's why. some stuff will change.

Yeah, that's why I do I noticed in the. last fight, the last fight after we did. it, uh I I was instantly elevated from. YouTube star to like whatever the the. level right right below like traditional. celebrity and YouTube star, like. whatever's in between that. You're you're a boldfaced name. People. know who you are. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. cuz like you know you. walk in somewhere it's not like oh. that's a guy that makes YouTube videos. like oh [ __ ] this [ __ ] knows how. to fight and it's it's a different level. of respect and the fight game is huge. I. love fighting. I've been watching UFC. forever.

It's huge and it's growing. I mean it's. huge and it's growing and it's like. what's going to be next like uh and this. could be it you know seeing people. actually get to you know talk [ __ ] but. also back it up if they want to in the. ring. May maybe because the online shitalking. is there's never really been a place for. it to culminate. Yeah. Nobody goes and organizes a fight. between Rose and Washington Post with. blue hair and Chappelle. They should be. fighting each other in the ring. Yeah, that's big business. Someone's got. to do it. 100%. When you say like looking back on. yourself like uh and you can watch like.

videos when you're younger, it's kind of. crazy that most people don't have that. experience though. It's like you're like. one of the few people that can have that. experience cuz so much of you is. documented. So then so much of who I was. right was pretending to be at the time. Yeah. But we all were. It's like that's just a. phase a lot of us go through in life. But did did you did you like when you. look back at footage from like 5 years. ago, do you do you feel like you were a. lesser version of yourself or. Oh, yeah. And I loved it, dude. Okay. I loved being a lesser version of.

myself. I've had to be like more, you. know, you got to get do stuff, you got. to call Nick, you know, you got to do. all kinds of stuff. Now it's more. responsibility. I feel you. So, I like the lesser version when I. didn't have to do that much, you know? Um, but I but that's also me a little bit. older. Like if I'm looking back on my n. teen years and stuff, dude. I who the [ __ ] knows what would be. on there, bro. Crazy [ __ ]. Yeah, bro. Anything involving fire? Uh. that you can legally discuss,

dude. We used to do this thing vipping. where girls would put a LSD in their. vagina, dude. Yeah. And how'd that work out? This was a fun school to go. This was a. fun high school. I just This high school. people are pregnant at fifth grade. This is a real interesting prop, dude. You got no heart. People are drinking gasoline, acid in. the vagina. You got no heart. These are like problems I didn't even. know could be problems. I'm like, I. didn't even know these things could. happen. This is Americana, bro. You have a gip. and it was an old school thing, but I.

think it's coming back. Bring it back. Bring it back. Is you get. [ __ ] up faster? Well, I mean, you get [ __ ] up almost. before you can even open your mouth and. close it back. Interesting. That's quick. That's way. think about that. Yeah, you put it in and then. Wow, that's quick, bro. Vipping. Who named it FIP? That's fast. acting. Vagina tripping, dude. Yeah. A couple of these broads that went. hard. So, let's go VIP. And then, what was that? [ __ ] boxing. What do you call it? [ __ ]. fighting. It was, first of all, it was some of. your people who brought the business to.

town. People got to make money. I agree. People got to make money. If. you're gay in Louisiana, in rural. Louisiana, you're going to have to beat. the [ __ ] out of another gay guy. You're. not designing houses. You're not an. interior designer. You're going to have. to fight and you hope that some fans. come in who are vipping. Some fan gags. that are all vipping who think it's. great. I [ __ ] bet $100 on this dude Enrique. one time. This very small [ __ ] guy. I. love that's how you It's amazing. Beautiful small guy. Did you Did Enrique lose or did he lose?

He [ __ ] lost, bro. But it was all. kind of set up and I didn't realize it. I was at the age where it was all a. show. I didn't realize it. Oh, this was like professional. wrestling. This was all choreographed. Yes, it was all choreographed. This is. poor gay dudes who couldn't become. dancers who had to just beat the [ __ ]. out of each other in Louisiana. I mean it was kind of like I mean it was. like you could you could you could. probably promote it one day. Yeah, there should be a movie. I want to see the movie about that. Yeah, bro. A gay a gay traveling. circuit, bro. They had these two dudes.

you could get you could you should be. able to wrestle with a bear at a a bar. You used to be able to do that. everywhere. that that had that had bears. Yeah. You can't do that now. You can't. do that now. It's dangerous. Yeah. Yeah. But it was just like people were more. You would go into a bar and wrestle a. bear. You got to give me. pay $10. and then you could just wrestle a bear. You could wrestle him for a little bit. In New York City, there was a really. rich guy in the late 1800s. He kept a. bear chained to a steak in his lawn. because that was a way to show everyone. he was really rich. I like that. Cuz he had a bear. That's gangster. Had. a big bear chain to a steak and just.

would The thing would hang out on the. lawn and people would be like, "That. guy's no joke.". There's not a better way to flex. You. think? There's not a better way to flex than. just having a bear like that. Yeah. Yeah, I'm trying to. I still think I still think that's. something you should consider. You've. done it all. Have the nice car in the. house. Who gives a [ __ ]. I trusted the bear, too. Get a bear. Get a grizzly to just hang. out. A grizzly. I have I have a mastiff. Tibetan. mastiff. Those are great. Do you have a Tibetan. mastiff? She's biting people, though. Well, they're vicious animals. Yeah, I didn't know. Yeah, I mean, they're vicious. I think it's sexy when a dog bites. somebody. I like to watch someone get bit, too. A little bit. Look, I hate to interrupt.

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promo code past today's um but yeah, it's just crazy that you can look back. on your life like nobody else says that. same thing where they have to look back. cuz then you're you're just more likely. to judge yourself. Dude, if 22year-old. me showed up right now, bro, what would. I think? You know, I'd be like, "Damn, dude. Tighten up, dude." You know? Really? Yeah. I think so. Yeah. What do you. think? You you think you're too loose? I just don't know. I just don't know. what I would open. You're too. I don't know what I would think. Yeah.

What did you guys think about the um. the Justin Bieber post? You see his post. about the. Tom Cruz. About the No, not Tom Cruz. Wants to fight. Well, he wanted to fight Tom Cruz. Can. you talk about the mental health one? Well, yeah. But first, let's talk about. Tom Cruz. Then that would be a good. fight on that same card. That would be a good fight. Cruz Bieber. I think I may not think be I think. Bieber would wipe the floor with the if. I'm being honest, man. I mean, I think so, too. Tommy's just too old, dude. Too old and. too. But you got that old man strength, though. And science, bro. If you got. Scientology, dude, you could do anything.

you want. You could do magic almost. Yeah, I don't know about that. Their whole thing is based on magic. I think the whole thing is based on. blackmailing gay dudes. I think that's. what it's really based on. It's going, "Here's a picture of you kissing a dude. What's that cost? 25 grand a month for. the rest of your life." You go, "Okay, cool. Whatever. I'm Batman." Or whatever. it is. I think that's what it is. I. don't think it's magic. I think it's I. think it's cameras. I feel like Logan gets nervous every. time Tim brings up gay people, but he he. is gay, so he's allowed to say all. Oh, yeah. I'm allowed to say everything.

I want. I can say the N word. I can say. I'm kidding. I can't say the N word. I. can say uh I'm. You can say look at this gay. Wait. Hey, are you gay? Yeah. Yeah. Oh, really? So, I can say. gay. Yeah. Logan's very nervous. No, I mean, look, I've had some. controversy. What' you do, man? [ __ ] You. [ __ ] those [ __ ] Don't worry about. it. Well, we are [ __ ] them. And it's not. going that well. They sound something cuz they always go. to the They always find something. homophobic that like a vi like. you didn't hear this.

I don't not I didn't hear. [ __ ] man. What happened? He's like I killed three. gay guys. He's like I hate to bring it. up. It's like I hate to bring it up. right now in Ohio. Me and Jacob was. funny to tie up three gay guys and light. them on fire. Uh sorry. Uh he's like you. didn't hear this? It was a guy named. Matthew Shepard and. it was the first viral video. Uh, we. tied him to a Anyway, no, I'm What did. you say? [ __ ]. Uh, no, no, dude. Um, I said we were. going we were going to uh hook up with. dudes in March. Male only March. You got. it?

And I used I used the verbiage I said we. were going to go gay. Right. Okay. That's funny. On a on an on our podcast. It's the. verbiage I use. And instead of saying, "Yo, we're going to hook up with dudes. for March." Mail Only March. It was a. joke. We did We did uh Sober vegan. January, Fatal February. We were The. joke was we're going to do Mail Only. March. And. I just it was uh just an out of touch. joke. You know, people got mad. Yeah, people got mad. Online people did. Online people. I mean, nobody in the real world cares. But and that's the truth. That's the. thing. If there's an online thing and. there's a real world thing, did it.

affect you think the long-term way that. people are interacting with you? Me? Yeah. Oh, it didn't. Like nobody at 7-Eleven turned around to. me were like, you hear about that. [ __ ] Mail Only March, they're going. to go gay. That's ridiculous. Yeah. Nobody. Nobody's cares. That's the crazy thing. People are just trying to get their kids. medicine. Like really, that's really the. real world. I know we're all in LA. Nobody cares. People just want to give. their kids medicine when they're sick. That's literally what people are worried. about. Dude, I don't know if I'd go gay for a. whole month, bro. Dude, I'd do a week. first. You guys seem brave. A month is a lot.

Yeah, it's heavy. Is there Would you do. straight for a month? You think? Yeah, absolutely. I would do straight. for a a a decent size starter house. Yeah. For the rest of my life. Like not even. like a mil to little Mediterranean style. on a busy corner. Doesn't even have to be no backyard. Partially rented out. Yeah. Oh my god. Bro, I mean, listen, you sound like an easy I. I would uh I would try it for months. I. mean, I've tried it before. I tried it a. bunch. It didn't work. Oh, really?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Cuz you know, I remember one time I. thought I was maybe gay for a little. while, but I was just really lonely, I. think, and I'd just been masturbating. too much. Yeah. And uh. you're attracted to yourself. essentially. Is that what you're saying? I don't know what was going on, dude. But it was just like I don't know, dude. Oh, I wasn't meeting any girls and I was. like, "Oh, [ __ ] man. If I'm not meeting. any girls, maybe I'm gay and I'm just. don't know what's going on, you know?". Right. So, no, never shut it off. Never. Like, who. knows? Oh, I'll 70 or 80, dude. I don't [ __ ]. care, dude. I'll [ __ ] anybody in here,

bro. For sure. I'll [ __ ] any of you creeps. That's a That's a That's a Let's all. hope, you know? That's all. That's that Richard Dixon right there, bro. You know. Um, but yeah, who knows, dude. I mean, who knows? Who know? But yo, also like who cares? I'll just say it like I've kissed dudes. before. I mean, it was an acting class, you know? Not like it it was over. recreational, but like I it was not. nothing against it. Do you remember the guy's name or not? Sean. I feel like it was Tyler. Oh, yeah. That's crazy. You know, is it by the beach? Dude, I.

would never kiss a guy named Tyler. Finland. He's an acting guy. I'm talking about Tyler from AMAW, the. big guy. I know exactly who you're talking about. Tyler, he's a famous actor. No, he's not. Oh, he's not? I know another Tyler. That's like a. What's Tyler? Is he in. Did you Did you go there? Yeah, I do. I used to be in Tony's class. for like years. So, that's what I'm saying. You do you. do scenes. Sometimes you get handed a. guy on guy scene and like let's be. honest, like I'm not a [ __ ] [ __ ]. bro. Relax him. I know you got excited when I. said I kiss this [ __ ] guy when his. arms fall off. When can I join the class? So, I want to.

be I want to be in your whole life. I want to be in power, you know. Can I. be in power? Will we [ __ ] if I'm in power? How does. it work? Can I be a prison guard? I. don't even know what power is about. It's about prison, right? No. All right. Sorry. Is Tyler just milling around these. classes waiting for this scene? He did. it to Giani. No. No. No. He has a girlfriend, too. Yeah. No, it's. Everybody has a girlfriend. It's And in any acting or movie, like. I've I've kissed dudes in in movies I've. been too. Like, yo, dude. The way it is worked, the way. Hollywood was going. Oh, I some dude kissed. Some dude. actually ejaculated on my arm when I was.

at um. What class was that? No, it wasn't a class. I was in a movie. theater. Very interesting. How did So, what happened then? His girlfriend gave him a hand job and I. was too close to him to him, you know. Louisiana was I was going to say that's. Was this in Louisiana, too? That's wild. Yeah. I mean, it's by kind of by the. interstate a little bit, but there by. the interstate. That's where the good. stuff you out, dude. 200 yards off the [ __ ]. interstate and you're in a film, bro. Do you remember? Can you name a better. town? Do you remember the movie? Huh? Yeah, I remember it. It's called. Punkin Head. It was a scary movie.

Those are the best movies to get hand. jobs in, though. Bro, I wasn't getting it, dude. I was a. [ __ ] victim. No, I know. But the guy, he like he. clearly he knew something. Oh, yeah, dude. It was second, bro. Second hand. Like second. What do you do? What do you do after you. just got come on in the movie? I didn't know what was going on, dude. I. thought I was gay for about 2 months, bro. Yeah. Interesting. Because you have to. at that age somebody comes on you in a. theater, bro. Makes you think. Well, it just makes you scared. I. thought. you're like, was I chosen? Is this the.

way it happens? Is this the way they. recruit people? Do I have a choice? Can I even look at a. woman now? I have to explain to her what. happened. Oh, it was a tough [ __ ] [ __ ]. affecting me, bro. Do you ever you how often you go back to. your home town now? I go back a lot, man. Yeah, I go back a lot. I was just in the. coast. I was just in Beluxy this weekend. doing a show and everybody. came. You did that Stardome that I saw. you were at. Yeah. Pretty cool. Yeah. Yeah. It was wild. It was wild. Did you ever do a tour? Did you ever. tour looking? No, I want to. I want to. Is it crazy? Uh, yeah. It's crazy. I mean, with.

standup, it's like I feel like it'd be. tougher for you for guys that are, you. know, kind of YouTube stars. I don't. know what the best term is, but with. boxing now, I mean, you could go and. sell and you could fight, but but I'm. just saying with YouTube, I think it's. different. Or, you know, at least I have. a thing to do. I was going to say, what the [ __ ] do I. do? You do Q&A. You suck my dick. No. Like, you know what I'm saying? Like, did you see that? Did you ever watch the. thing Chasing Cameron on Netflix where. they they like would. He didn't watch that. Nobody watched. all those Vine stars who go out and like. they would like throw water bottles in. the crowd. That's what they did. They.

they did what? I did. I did see that actually. Yeah, they they jumped around. They like. lip sync to songs. They like throw water. in the crowd. So, me personally probably would rather. uh dive than do than do that. Yeah. Looks good. I'm like a cash grab kind of. Um. What about the uh Yeah, the Bieber. posted. What do you think about that? Talking about the mental health one. Thought it was dope, man. Anytime a se. celebrity opens up about vulner. vulnerable [ __ ] like it's cool. Yeah. You know, and and and. pretty cool, I thought. Yeah. It's cool. A lot of a lot of. people relate to it. And so when when an.

icon can be open, you know, and truthful. about himself, it's it's cool. Yeah. 100%. Pretty wild to think. Yeah. I I just. couldn't imagine. because, you know, it shows people you. could have all this stuff, you could. have all the money, you could have all. the fame, you could be very talented, you could still not be happy, you could. still have a lot of those problems. Yeah, you know, it helps me perspective. real like perspect like. whenever I'm having just a [ __ ] day and. I'm like one of the wor, you know, sued. for like hundreds of thousands of. dollars like hurt myself in boxing in.

the morning and like sick and I'm just. like [ __ ] nothing's going right. I'm. always like someone someone somewhere. has it so much worse. Yeah. You know, yeah, lots of people lots of like I have. it continents have it worse. I'm right here. entire hemisphere is. having worked. I love how you're like. someone like he wakes up wherever he is. in Beverly Hills, he's like there's got. to be someone out there who's having a. bad day today like I'm having a bad day. and there's got to be some other person.

out there. Let's Let's go to a guy right here. We. got a guy right here who has a. This guy's having a worse day. This guy, he's driving a prison bus. He. is actually. Let's go to Michael. guys. Hey, just wondering, you know, with the. level of success that you guys have, is it hard to kind of smell the roses. sometimes and be actually proud of what. you've done and, you know, be uh really. grateful and happy with where you're at, or do you think it's like always going. to be a constant battle of wanting the. next best thing and not really taking. the time to really think about how cool.

it is to be in the position you're at? Feels like sometimes a constant battle. of always wanting the next thing. Um, but yeah, would love to know, guys. Thanks, Gang Gang. Gang gang, bro. That's a great question, man. That's a great question. Um, you always want to do more stuff, right? Well, I think that that is something. that happens to people. I think there's. certain types of people that you there's. a drive to I don't know if it's success.

or achievement or conquering the next. thing where it's just a thing in your. brain that turns over where it's like. okay what next do I try and accomplish. and it's never changed you happen to. accomplish things along the way. but it's what do what am I going to do. next? Yeah. Um. what gets you excited? That's what I. feel. It's like whatever excites you. like you're excited by this fight. Yeah. you want to do. This is what. you're into right now. Whatever you're into, it might not be. what you're into in six months or a. year, but then you got to go find that. thing. Yeah. And then keep getting excited.

But your brain also, I think some. people's brains, some people's the way. they are is going to find that no matter. what. It's like it's just in you to find. whatever that thing is. It's the same. reason why you found whatever the first. thing was that kind of got you going. Well, it's fear that keeps you from. that, right? I think a lot of people. want to do things, they don't do them. they're afraid or of doing them or their. circumstances prevent them from doing. them. But I think if you get rid of the. fear of like maybe I'll fail at that or. maybe that's not going to be what I. think it's going to be. If you get rid. of that fear, then you're just open to.

what is the next thing. What is the next. thing? Yeah, it it is hard to look back. I. think it's definitely hard to like stop. and kind of smell the roses kind of. I I make myself sometimes like I'll I'll. force myself to go on vacation or like I. I take Sundays off now no matter what. Wow. Cuz otherwise it just you get. caught up in this cycle of just trying. to go go go and then you [ __ ] yourself. You shoot yourself in the foot. Oh yeah. Both my feet are [ __ ]. That's what I'm saying. Too hard. Too too much yoga. Yeah, you got to chill. You got to chill. That's what I'm.

saying. But no yoga trainer. It can burn. I feel like definitely. burnout is a real thing. But a lot a lot of successful people. that I know uh weren't chasing the thing. that they have now. they were they they. loved what they did and then they get. the win and that's where their dopamine. spike comes in and that's what makes. them happy that's what excites them and. then you know it gets old on to the next. what else can I do what else can I. conquer. uh so I think it's just you got to find. that that thing that makes you happy and. then it it's like a compound effect if. you keep going and going and going next. thing you know you have all this success.

but this success didn't come didn't come. overnight I've been doing this [ __ ] for. you know 15 [ __ ] years as all of us. have. and there's a price for it I mean his. success is really you're just You're. starting to get more popular right now. Tim, would you say that? Yeah, a little bit. Yeah. Yeah. It's. start over the last year has been good. It's been a good year. Do comedy like. eight and a half, nine years. Last year. has been really good. And what do you kind of attribute that. to? I think just having opportunity, more. people knowing about you, coming out. here more. I was in New York and I love. New York, but coming out here, meeting. more people, you know, getting the.

chance to go and do different things and. then just being funny. So, getting a. chance and being funny, getting funny, and then going and getting a chance to. be funny in front of people. Like Burke. Chryser is like if you just build houses. in a neighborhood and nobody sees them. but then you get a chance to build a a. house in neighborhood and people are. looking at it and they're like oh I like. that I want build my house. So I think. that's what it is. It's just sticking. with something and then till it matters. Yeah. Once people see that you can do. Yeah. It's sometimes it comes too early. for people too. It's like you haven't. really you don't really have your art. down and then you get an opportunity and.

and then everybody sees your art as not. I mean we know a ton of dudes that. audition for SNL when they were 19 or. they had a huge opportunity when they're. super young and or they got an. opportunity and it just didn't work. They were on a hot show for a year or. whatever and you know now those people. you know live in their cars and they're. suicidal and you know it's all over for. them. But you know but they're good to call. and be like God I'm not them. Huh? You. know that that's important to keep them. around. Somewhere someone somewhere. somewhere. That's what I'm saying. You. got to keep them in your phone and be.

like, "God, you're around. You're still. alive." All right. Well, when I first moved here, me and my. buddy Paul, uh, we didn't have an. apartment yet, so we slept in the ball. pit on the McDonald's ball pit over off. of Wilshire. Yeah. We jump in there at. night. You're lying. No, we jump in there at night. Get in. the ball pit cuz it was safe. That was. the biggest thing. We tried to stay in a. park, but. Was it though? Was it though? That was. like the lowest level of Jeffrey. Epstein's Island. sleeping in a. McDonald's ball pit. That's like the. poorest pedophile move. But here's. sleep in the ball pit. Uh, you know, we.

take a public bus there. The third night, bro, me and my buddy. Paul are in there just laying. You would. get like under the balls. The worst part. was there's like a lot of hair and loose. change under. You're dead serious right now. Dead serious. This is amazing. And the third night we're in there, we're talking just like we have been the. past few nights. Some Asian guy is. sleeping on the slide and we didn't even. go. Yo, that's what I was saying. Like, would you buy it down? Let me ask you a question. Did was there. no security? Did no one in the McDonald's care?

It was shut down. They they they. How did you get in? This one closed. You just jump right. over the fence and you're in the ball. pit and you're in the play area. Oh, outdoor ball. Outdoor ball pit. Yeah. Not indoors. You [ __ ] Dude, I. never saw an outdoor ball pit in my. life. Yeah. And also, how the [ __ ] is that. safe? You a couple of Rothschilds, huh? Indoors. [ __ ] animals. Well, cuz. you're First of all, you're in a place. you. No one's going in there. At what point did you say to yourself, "This is not a sustainable course of. action.". Oh, dude. Like, at what point when. you're under when you're under the balls. and you're sleeping in some hair of. whatever, you keep your head out of the.

balls. That's a real moment. That's a. real moment in your like one of those. moments for me. I was Santa Claus in. like Harlem. and I was getting [ __ ] on all day by. like four-year-old kids. And you can say black kids. Yeah. They were they well some of them. were Dominican but uh they were just. roasting me just shamelessly be none of. them were happy to see Santa these are. hardened little kids like [ __ ] you you. fat [ __ ] I'm like I'm Santa you know and. I would jing the jingle the bell and. then every now and then some drunk would. like dance with me and I was like this. is a rough I hope comedy works out.

you know so that had to be the ball pit. moment when your your head's out of the. balls you're like god I hope this works. out I just hated the fact that we were I. just didn't like there was a traffic it. was right on Wilshire So it was like a. lot of traffic. That was the biggest problem was the. traffic. I was still a little I was. younger so I could handle the pressure. of it. But it it was just wasn't my. favorite thing. But um [ __ ] What were. we talking about, dude? Everything since you slept in a ball pit. is going to been erased from my mind. Oh, speaking of Asians, bro, we got a.

[ __ ] Asian right here. Let's hear. this beautiful Viet. Hey, what's up guys? So my question is. for both you guys. So, if you guys had. the chance to have an interview or a. podcast with anyone dead or alive, who. would that be? [ __ ] man. That question always sucks. I. feel like. Yeah, no offense, man. Sorry. I shouldn't have said that. It's a basic [ __ ] question. It's just Yeah, man. It's a very basic [ __ ] question. Abraham Lincoln.

I want to know, you know, Wesley Snipes. Yeah. Um, you know, somebody else. I would say either in both of them. Either Christopher Hitchens or Patrice. O'Neal. I would say Prince or [ __ ] I would. say actually probably Michael Jackson or. Michael Landon. What would you what would you talk to. Michael about? I would go in on him real hard about. just seeing you know what, you know, what what his sexual preferences were. Probably trying to really just chat. about it. And what about Michael Landon? That's. where I'm more I'm more perplexed about. that.

I love Michael Landon, man. Okay, interesting. I'd do Nicola Tesla. Oh wow. I mean, dude, damn. He's he's Do you know because I don't. even Do you know enough to even. interview a guy like that? I wouldn't. even. You might be right. He's very tough. How much do I know about Tesla coils? You know, I don't know. Are you going to bring Nicola Tesla back. and be like, "Dude, the cars dope." I. would be like, "Hey, I wouldn't know. what to say to him.". Yeah. Hey, won't you fight Elon Musk on. the undercar? That's. Oh, that's a night. That's. Oh, you know what? They said he died a. virgin. I think I'd probably just ask. him straight up if if he like needed.

some some things. But virgin power is so strong, bro. Virgin Oh, dude. That's crazy. Oh, a uh somebody parked a Volkswagen. rabbit on this guy's leg one time. outside of our schoolhouse, and I saw a. virgin [ __ ] lift it right off his. leg. Wild. Yo, what? And this was in [ __ ] who knows when. it was. Every scene is from like the movie. Powder. Every scene. It's amazing. What are you talking about? Every scene of your life stories like. that. I've never seen a virgin pick up a. car. Yeah, they pick up AK-47s now. That's the.

problem, bro. Virgins now are picking up. AR-15s. Hopefully, they start picking up. cars again. That would be nice. They need to start passing out some. [ __ ] then, bro. I agree with you. Cuz they're shutting down all the [ __ ]. bro. That's who's doing it. That's right. We got a version right. here. Let's hear this young woman. This is the furthest thing from a basic. [ __ ] question. What's up, Theo? This question's for all. three of you guys. You can't leave the. room until you form a human centipede. What's the order going to be? Oh my god. [ __ ]. What are you What are you on, man?

These are our fans. Yeah, these are people coming in from. 8chan. to discuss. It's 4chan now, dude. Right. They took four away. [Music]. Or you're eating cleanest. So, I would. probably say you up top, man. Yeah. Tight. Tight. You're up front. I gotta go in the back. because I have the least amount of going. on in my career. That's true of the caboose, dude. Yeah, I have the least amount going on. My manager would be like, "You're lucky. to be there. You eat who's ever asked.

They tell you to eat. Don't start any. problems. You don't You're not eating. the ass, bro. You're just being there as. a receptacle. It's a human centipede, right?". Yeah, but don't get sexual. We're there. to [ __ ] survive, dude. You know what I'm trying to get out of. the room. It's like an escape room. This. guy obviously works at the mall. The the middle guy works at the mall. Where do you think he even come up with. a question? Like. she sit at the mall all day smelling. churros thinking about what to ask. The middle person dies quick though, Theo. I think. But I'll sacrifice myself just to get. out of the [ __ ] situation.

Did you see that movie? I never saw that. movie. Oh, cuz they're Why? Cuz they're. Oh, wait. One one of them dies quick. Just like you know, like biology. Oh, interesting. You get infected. Yeah. You get a lot of UTI. By the way, I saw the movie. Did you? I didn't see the movie. I see it. Is it. brutal? Great flick. I want to watch. Let's watch. I don't. want to watch I might watch No, not now, but like tonight or go to our own. respective places. Back to our neutral corners. I'm not saying let's just watch a movie. for two hours right now. Back to our neutral corners. Yeah.

Wow. That's crazy, man. Hey guys, this is the. last interruption, I promise, but I got. a I got to sweeten the deal for you. And. I'm talking about honey. Nine times out. of 10, shopping online beats going to. the store. It's true. You go to the. store, who knows what could happen. You. might fall down. Oh, what's happening. here? The lettuce is bad. Where are all. the televisions I want? So online, you know what you want. You.

get it. They bring it to you. You at. home, you were already ready to enjoy. it. Nine out of 10en times though, you're overpaying online for whatever. you're buying. That's why you need. Honey. Honey is a free browser extension. that saves you money everywhere you shop. online. That's right. You just download. Honey on your computer. It's there. When. you're right before you're buying. something, Honey lets you know if. there's a better place and a better rate.

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question. It's a great question from a. smart guy. You called him a woman before one of you. did. He looks He looks That guy has that. look. People don't want to be a man. Yeah. Some people actually, dude, a lot. of guys just want to be men. They're. trying their best, man. And they're. really [ __ ]. But what is a man? Huh? Like, what's a man? I think a man is a guy that's trying to. just look nice when he leaves the house. and. do. Does he use Does he use hand sanit. sanitizer? Do his best. He can.

He can. If he has it in his truck. and if he doesn't have a truck, he's not. a man. Got to have a truck. Not saying. that, dude. But. I think it helps. You can't be on a [ __ ] bird scooter. for [ __ ] months out of the year. 100%. Yeah, I agree with you. You gota have a. cool job. You can't be like a teacher or. something dumb. No, you could have a man teacher, but. you got to [ __ ] dress still like a. man and wear cologne. I agree with you. Okay. If you wear cologne around children, dude, you're a [ __ ] man. You're the guy. If you walk through that.

hallway and it just suffocates people, you're cologne. The kids are like, you're [ __ ] the Spanish teacher and. everybody knows it. Yeah, I agree. I'm I. agree. Did you guys ever have any teachers hit. on you? Um, even after you were out of school, especially probably with your success, did you have any teachers that kind of. reached out? Uh, I I had it I hit on the teachers. That was that was risky, though. Cuz were you successful and in high. school at the same time? No. No. I I was like a good football. player, you know, so I kind I kind of I. semi got the pass so I could like.

say some things like, "Oh, like you look. I like your hair today." And and she'd. be like, "Yeah, take your seat." eat and. I'll be like, "All right, all right.". But we know what's up. Yeah, we know what's happening. But yo, I mean, who doesn't have that. weird fetish where it's like, I would. love to hook up with one of my teachers. Like, my biology teacher smoke show. Yeah, she was she was bad. I I did cocaine with a substitute and. that's all that's as far as I got. We. just did. How old were you? I was maybe 18, maybe like the year I.

graduated high school. We're doing coke. with the the sub one of our substitutes. And was he a homosexual or no? She No, it was a chick. A woman. Yeah. She was just um. sub subs are the end, dude. What class? She was an English sub. So she was an. idiot. Yeah. So she wasn't smart. She was probably. trying to go out and sniff some coke. and, you know, [ __ ] her way into the. lower middle class. She was [ __ ] her way. into a little levit house in Long. Island. Good woman. Good woman. Oh my god, bro. You got to play Santa. more often, dude. I would love to watch.

the small black kids attack you. They just roasted me. They they were. brutal. And here's the other thing. I. wasn't just Santa. I was selling. Obamacare. Because the thing was that. you was a healthcare truck. Santa's got. a [ __ ]. And you would have to like get them with. the they'd be like, "Oh, there's Santa.". And then you you get the kids in then. you grab their parents and be like, "That's called a bait and switch. It's a bait and switch big time." Then. you grab their parents, you be like, "Listen, you're going to have a high. deductible, but it doesn't matter. Just. declare bankruptcy. You don't have to. give them a fake name anymore." Um, you.

know, and you'd have to explain to the. kids, you know, like this is this is a. present that you're not going to realize. the importance of now. Yeah. So, it was it was a dark time. I had fun with it, though. You had fun. with it. I was younger. I was doing. comedy. My life's shitty. Your life's. been a real piece of [ __ ]. It's been It's been something. Okay. You know, I never slept in a ball pit, but I I'm not against it. Like, I'm not. opposed to sleeping in a ball. But still, man, they were they were brutal little kids. Yeah. Oh, I could see that. Dude, I was. in Vietnam once and I let a couple of. kids cut my hair, right? I thought it'd. be like a fun thing to do, something. different for them.

And this one [ __ ] [ __ ] kid, bro, instead of trying to make it look nice, just [ __ ] cut a bunch. Yeah, they're they're demon little kids. Yeah. So, that hit me hard. Nick, let's throw. a topic out there. You got a couple. topics, man, and we'll get through this. Yeah. Uh, let's see. Prince Harry. responded to criticism. Uh, he took a. private plane four times in 11 days with. his family. uh and people took umbrage. with it because he's considered an. ambassador for climate change awareness. He uh responded back said, "I came here.

by commercial. I spent 99% of my life. traveling the world by commercial. Occasionally, there needs to be an. opportunity based on a unique. circumstance to ensure my family are. safe." And it's genuinely as simple as. that. I mean, I think you're Prince Harry, man. You could do whatever you want. I. think while you're still ambassador for. climate change awareness, even me, I. don't know what that mean. Somebody that's hoping it's actually. real. something about you show up somewhere. and you're like, "By the way, we got to, you know, we got to get these. glaciers back in order and then get out.

of there." What are you even doing? To be honest, the the article said. ambassador for climate change, which. sounds like you're trying to make. climate change happen. So, I added the. uh. This is a thing that people elites have. to do now that they have no interest in. Like, if somebody goes to him and goes, "You got to get out. You're dude, the. planet is falling apart. You got to. You're the ambassador for climate. change. Look at these six seagulls I got. on my phone. Go over there and take a few pictures in. Greenland and, you know, let everybody. know we're doing the right thing. You. know, that's crazy. Tell the poor people to.

Plus Michigan, they're hoping for a. little climate change. You telling me we get eight extra. degrees in the winter, bro? [ __ ] sign me up, dude. [ __ ] a. penguin, bro. You know what I'm saying? [ __ ] a polar bear. Who cares? Yeah. I want to be able to go outside in. the yard on Christmas. Like, that's the. thing. Climate change is going to it's. definitely going to really hurt probably. millions, but it's also going to. it's going to help the 48,000 people. that live in Michigan. It's going to restructure the value of. um. real estate.

around the Great Lakes. So suddenly the people that have all the. in inland real estate there people like, "Oh, you live in a [ __ ] hole, man. You. live in cuz Manhattan and Miami are. underwater.". Yeah. Frozen are underwater. You're. [ __ ] now. Who's [ __ ] Yeah. Every. now look how rich you are. Yeah. You. can't swim. They're buying in Montana. A lot of. wealthy people buying stuff in Montana. right now. Yeah. Huge. So, I'm just saying it's go what goes. around comes around. Dude, you can't win. them all. So, it's like, you know, you. get ice, sometimes you don't. That's the way to that's that's probably. our official policy on climate change.

now with Trump. Like, I think Trump. would be like, "Sometimes you get iced, sometimes you don't." Next question. But first of all, then you have [ __ ]. like the ice age. Those [ __ ] little. animals are having a blast. Dude, you. see that? They made a second one. So, fun as hell. They made a second one. Yeah. Yeah. Everyone's fine. How [ __ ] bad was it? How bad could it be? Yeah. It's a big snow day for a whole H. Yeah. Giving Dennis Liry a job. Yeah. No [ __ ] huh? Climate change is keeping a lot of. [ __ ] people in business, man. I'm with you, dude. Or nonclimate change. I don't even know.

which is which anymore. What else we. got, man? Over the weekend, the Boston straight. straight pride parade actually happened. Uh about 200 people marched and 600. protesters showed up. Three dozen people. were arrested on various charges, including disorderly conduct. Dude, this is just fun. People need. something to do. People need stuff to. do. People get mad at these skirmishes. in Portland and stuff. People need to. dress up and beat each other up with. batons and shields. This is what it is. Not everybody's going to build a.

business or have a family. Some people need to just let it out. Let. it out. It is what it is. I'm not even I. mean just have fun. Televise it. Yeah. Just write. Oh, that'd be like a sick pay-per-view. Yeah. And by the way, this is what I would be. doing. Like I'd be I'd be fighting. people in the streets like like laring. like like real laring. That's what I'd. be doing if I wasn't doing this. There's nothing to do in Ohio. Oh, you got Well, there's more to do. than LAR and fight people in the street. I'm sure. Not that I remember. Not that I.

remember. A few businesses. You can sell cars. You have a car. dealership in Columbus, Ohio. Be. killing. Alcoholics Anonymous was. started in Akran, dude. Tons of [ __ ] to. do. There's the Rock on the Range music. festival where all those families go. vape together and watch Machine Gun. Kelly, you know, Yellow Wolf. There's a. lot going on. Saw MGK at your house. That's true. Yeah, we love MGK. We can watch them at. MGK. Yeah, it was great. I watched I I did. comedy there. No one wanted that. Really? They didn't want that. It's Well, I. mean, it's Nobody's there for that. I. mean, we were in a tent. We were in like. the comedy tent and then MGK and those.

guys were in the other thing and we we. didn't even want to do our like, can we. just go watch. Yeah. the show and obviously we had to. we were a tent for people that were like. coming like they would go vomit in the. portaotti and then come back to our tent. to just get their bearings and then and. then go back. You were like an ancillary thing. Yeah. To get back to the main show. So. it wasn't it wasn't my best. like a bathroom. You guys were almost. like a bathroom. We were absolutely a bathroom. Yeah. And I would do it this year. But it was. a fun the concert was great. Yeah.

Um straight pride parade. I don't know. if I really. Why Why are the Why are the straight. people marching? Like. I think Well, I definitely think that. straight men feel kind of attacked. I. think there's a lot of men that feel. really attacked probably especially by. like the news and stuff like that. Like. if you're a straight white, if you're a. straight white Christian man, you're. definitely you're a complete piece of. [ __ ] You have no value anymore. You. ruined the world. Um I think there's a. lot of that kind of just loose energy. kind of milling around. It's not like it's not like an oppressed. group. So like politely like [ __ ].

right suck a dick. It's not an oppressed group, but I think. it's still so right. So most people. aren't doing it. But then you. That's why only 200 people showed up and. and 600 protesters, by the way. Like. Yeah. Oh yeah. And the protesters are. the ones that make the whole event. Like. if they didn't show up, no one would. care. Definitely. Literally no one would care. They have. these big marches where four Nazis show. up and then 30,000 protesters show up. and they're like, "We're defending. civilization from these four." And it's. just like four fat guys with helmets. they taped onto their head with like,

you know, like weird white supremacist. signs and they're and they're being. guarded by like 20 police officers to. protect their free speech and they're. like they just have the signs up and. then there's like 30,000 lesbians with. green hair just throwing rocks at these. four guys and it's like but also trying. to steal their outfit. Yeah. Right. They're also it's just like. oh this is civiliz and they're throwing. milkshakes at each other. Yo, I heard I. heard they fill those milkshakes with. quick cement, quick dry, but it's like. heard that. they look like milkshakes and they're.

really just like hard little cylindrical. cement. Milkshake brings all the boys. What a. fat country that we're having a dessert. themed revolution. People chucking. brownies at each other. Dude, my cousin [ __ ] took a creme. brulee to the [ __ ] sternum the other. day. Really? What happened? The same this [ __ ] got out of hand. Yeah, it's [ __ ] great though. Bro, it's definitely brulets are so good, bro. It's entertaining. It Now, who who. got them? Can you say. it's entertaining? Huh? Can you say. a black woman?

Interesting. Great. Was it? That's what I was picturing. before you vocalized it. I wanted to. make sure I wasn't racist. No, you're not right, bro. It's not. racist. Just if if a black person's. involved in something, it's not racist. I agree with you. Otherwise, the whole NFL would be racist. or the whole everything would be. I agree. Why did he So, he just It. popped off. [ __ ] popped off, dude. There was two. restaurants near each other. at Dishto. Yeah. So he got hit with. ramkin. that see that hurts. Took a ramkin to the sternum. Sternum, bro. And that hurts. You ever hurt hitting the sternum real.

hard? It [ __ ] hurts, bro. Reminds you of. your [ __ ] who your parents are. suddenly. Yeah, it's true. Both of my parents flashed before my. eyes every time I get [ __ ] punched. and [ __ ]. You ever you ever forget in general like. who your parents are? Yeah. My dad's. been dead a long time. The other day my. people was like, "Oh, what's up with. your dad?" And I was like, "Where's my. dad been?" And then I was like, "Oh, he's he deceased. Oh, here is he." So sometimes, yeah, I get. I'll miss a frame or two. Um, what else. we got, Nick? Well, I think we'd be remiss if we did. we let Tim get out of here without. letting us know what really happened. with Jeffrey Epstein. You seem to be.

encyclopedic. Yeah, I mean, you know, and you're rich enough where you could. get involved in this [ __ ] So, yeah, let's hear what's going on. We'll ne we'll never know. I mean, that's I mean, he was clearly either. murdered or allowed to kill himself. I. mean, that you have narcoleptic prison. guards. You have malfunctioning cameras. You have him making a will the day. before he died. You have him being taken. off suicide watch 48 hours before he. died. You I mean to if you don't believe. there's something going on, you're in on. it. Yeah. That's the way I feel like. If you don't. believe him buying a Sorry, I'm dead.

shirt on Amazon two days before. Yeah. I mean, him having dinner last. night in West Hollywood. Uh that was a. little suspicious. Having a dinner party. called Welcome Jeffrey to the Hood, that. was odd. His new job at the Disney. Channel, questionable. questionable. Uh, but that's what h you'll never know what. happened. Football season's coming. No. one cares. People want to watch the. Bachelor. They don't care. Politicians. are having sex with kids on islands. That's a fact. And now no one cares. It's like, doesn't matter anymore. You.

talk to somebody in the supermarket. They're like, "That was last week.". I'm like, "Yo, so politicians are like. banging kids on an island. They're like, "Get out of it. Was last week. I'm over. that." So, it's just a spectrum, man. It's a. spectrum, dude. It is what it is, man. These people. aren't getting so rich so that they can. just keep eating steaks. They want to. get involved in [ __ ]. It is true. They're starting to they, you know, they want to fight people from. other countries. Yeah. You know, that's right. That's how it starts and it escalates. Man, it's crazy. I'm just I I'm just I to me. it makes me happy thinking of Bill and. Hillary Clinton sitting in their home.

the day he was killed, whether they. knew. Are you pro-choice or pro- life when it. comes to young children having to have. sex with rich people? Here's the thing. I don't think young. children should uh have to have sex with. rich people, but I don't want any more. comics, right? You know what I mean? So, those kids got. to do something. I think you bring back. the workhouses, you know? I think what. China's doing right now is very positive. with the kids, getting them in working. young. Teach them the value of the. Oh, do the balancing on each other. Yeah, I like all that. Get the kids in. gymnast. No, they shouldn't have to [ __ ].

Bill Clinton and Alan Dersitz. Yeah, well, you [ __ ] ruined it. You ruined. the episode. I'm. sorry. I may feel differently when I get. successful, though. That might be that. might be one of those things where when. I get really successful, I'm like, "What. was I thinking? I was such a loser.". Yeah. Who knows? Who would be in the undercard of your of. your belts? I want him on now. You know, who would he fight, though? I don't. know. It's a good question. Let's have it be a.

woman. Let's start small. It needs to be. another gay man cuz we can bring back. the the gay boxing. What about a trans. What about a a woman who's now a man? Can I fight a woman a a woman who's now. identifies as a man? I think you guys can. If you wear. matching, I let me tell you right now, I will do. that. Please speak to your people. I. will do that. Uh if everyone's good with. it, I'm in. My m my Asian will be so. excited. It's a They'll be like, "How. was that podcast?" I'm like, "You're. never going to believe it. I'm fighting. a trans person at the Staple Center.".

You're like my Asian will be like, "Thank God." You're like me and. Thank God this is a good year. This is a. good year. Me and Chelsea Handler are about to. [ __ ] go toe. Dude, I would love to hit Chelsea hand. Bro, she's two arguments away from. dropping a set of nuts. Dude, I saw her on a plane the other day. and she just she looks mean. She looks so mean. But why do some rich people get so mean? I don't know, but she looks super mean, dude. She looks like somebody would kick. a service dog. Yeah. Yeah. She's got that energy. People get lonely and mean, man.

That's what happens, dude. Money doesn't. make everything. It really just doesn't. make everything great, you know. No, it doesn't. It helps sometimes. It helps things. Yeah. What they say? Somebody said, "It help me make you warm. in the winter and cool in the summer.". That's what somebody said, right? That's a poor person saying that. That's a homeless person's idea of what. money is. You get cool and warm. It's. like, no, there's many other things you. get. That's an insane. That's like the. lowest level of what money can do. Do. you think. you get water when you're thirsty and.

food when you're hungry? Oh, money. Oh, man. You get mittens. in December. What about uh fame? Let's talk for a. minute about fame and then we'll get out. of here. Popularity. What do you think. about it, Logan? Man, it's it's I mean, do you worry. about it? Do you are there things you. see that where it could get out of hand? For sure. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I mean we. you you know, we've all seen it like. fame gets to your head and then all of a. sudden like these young child actors are.

doing drugs and partying at way too. early and they grow up way too fast and. then they don't know who they are when. they're like 22 23 when you're like. supposed to be discovering yourself. So. yeah, I mean it. um it it depends on the person. Obviously it's all circumstantial to me, you know. I mean, but is there a difference between like. what you do in working in a in a in an. environment where it's a little bit more. people get an idea of who you are. than just an idea just a a a like a J. like just a worshshiping of.

an image of someone? Does that make any. sense? Yeah. Yeah. I'm So, so my [ __ ] my shit's. like relatable. I'm approachable. You. what you see on the screen is pretty. much what you get in real life, you. know? So people, oh yo, Logan, what's. good? I dab him up. I say what's up. We. joke about whatever. And that's the new. fame. Like the old fame is almost. creepy. Like the old actors who you. don't know anything about. It's kind of creepy, right? Cuz it's. like it's you're so used to like guys. like him or or you or anybody that has a. platform being very open and public. So. when those like when you have actors.

that aren't like that, it's kind of. strange like that type like. you remember you remember you remember. seeing I everyone's had this experience. in LA where you you know this actor. who's got the most the bubbliest. personality on screen and then you say. hi to him in real life and they're they. suck. Yeah. The kid from Young suck the life. out of you. [ __ ] Literal piece of [ __ ]. and I hate his guts. I was like yo what. up Sheldon? He just stared at me and I. was like I'll kick you in the in the. neck. You know what I mean? Hey, can you can you kick people in the. neck?

I could try. I would have to get a. train. Dude, a gay guy, you can do a lot more. stuff. And I know I'm not just saying. you're a gay guy. I know you're a lot of. different stuff, but you can, as a gay. man, you can kick somebody in the. [ __ ] neck and you're kind of okay. with it. I don't think a straight man or. you know, I'm not the type of gay guy to get away. with that. Like if if if the Jesse. Smlette hate crime people happened to. me, people would be like, "Oh, good.". Like if they showed my face, they'd be. like, "Two guys hit him." They'd be. like, "Good." No news story. Well, good. I'm glad he got hit and that and next. So, it's like certain gay guys get away.

with it. Certain gay guys are like, "Yeah, oh, good." You know, we need more. gay bank robbers and stuff. Why aren't. you guys. I always wanted more gay gang leaders. Like, that's what I wanted. Gay. criminals, gay gangsters. That's real. equality, dude. That's what I'm saying, man. A lot. of gay guys are just kind of milling. around the outskirts of like real estate. and [ __ ]. I know. They're trying to live these. like posh lives. I'm like, get in the. game. Yeah. Where these real [ __ ] I. don't want a gay dude [ __ ] milking. animals. I I want putting a Glock in someone's. mouth money. It's going to happen. It's. going to come. Good. Yeah. I think they're already there, man.

Yeah, they're already there. We probably. just don't know. Yeah, we don't. You don't know. Oh, that's true. That's true. Don't know. There's a lot of dudes in the closet. Those are the the you know, a lot of. closeted guys. Yeah. Yeah. Well, Tim, you [ __ ] on Power. Uh. the lead of the Mexican cartel is gay in. the show. I didn't say I don't [ __ ] on it. I said. it's for people with 75 IQ's. And that. is a fact. It's for a simpler group of. people. It is not for people that demand. a lot from entertainment. It's from. people that are like, "Oo, that's a. gangster and that's a gangster and then. the gangsters fight." And there's. nothing wrong with that. Um, but it's a. show for [ __ ] people.

It's dumb. A lot of adults that drink. juice boxes. It's a very dumb show. It's very dumb. And the people who write. it are. very simple. Hey. Hey. Yeah. I'm a gangster. We're going to. build empire. Okay. Black History Month. Here's it. Here we go. What is it about? What's it even about? Literally, it's it's just about uh these two kids. who grow up together. It's just about. immediately. It's just about you're. lowering our expectations. We already. have none. It's actually about two guys who grew up.

together and they sell drugs. Um. Oh my god. No. I had no idea. But the guy who he grew up with, his um. the girl that he was in love with when. he was younger, she works for the FBI. and they um start dating again. So it's like Homeland. and Homeland and every. Yeah. But before they did it, it was. this was like 2011 when it started. Sounds good. I'll start watching that. Um. I just want. I'll start watching that in the break. room at Arby's with the rest of the. crew.

I want to say this, man. Um. one of the uh. Sorry. Who is it though? It's my manager. I think he heard I was. fighting a trans person. He's very. excited. He already know it's your manager. He's. doesn't even have the number saved, by. the way. No, it's just a New York City. I'm not. going to I'm going to fire him soon. He's not getting his numbers in. Yeah, dude. If you're married does. nothing. If he has time to call you during the. day, dude, he's obviously [ __ ] not. that busy. No, he does nothing. Yeah. He'll call me and he's crazy, man. He'll call me for a vacation and start. talking about his vacation. I'm like, "Can you get me a [ __ ] job, please?".

Yeah. He just goes, "It's great." That's all. he goes. He goes, "It's great. It's. great. I'll talk to him." I go, "It's. great." I go, "What isn't like Comedy. Central think?" He goes, "They don't. want anything to do with it." He goes, "It's great. I think it's great." And. it's like, "All right, thanks.". Why is he talking like he playing hide. and go sequence? He just talk He's the last manager from. the '9s. He wears like white pants. He. He has like me, Colin Quinn. He has good. people. He's just out of it. Like he has no He didn't know Rogan was. like a popular podcast. He's like done. He's like out of it. He's checked out. Do you think going back to like the uh. the fame and the um that like it's Yeah.

There's something different about like. Hollywood fame and about fame popularity. from YouTube. It's almost like they're. two different things a little bit. For sure. Yeah. For sure. Yeah. YouTube. is is weird cuz uh the drug that you get. from from getting views and likes and. subscribers and followers is it it. reaffirms everything that you're doing. and so you know whether you're on the. right path or not you're going to keep. doing the same [ __ ] as long as people. are following. Whereas Hollywood, technically you're employed, you know.

So. take Tom Holland for example. Before he. became Spider-Man, there was a team. around him. watching everything he did, monitor. monitoring every move that he'd made. just to make sure he didn't have any. missteps because because now he's in the. Marvel universe and you can't you cannot. [ __ ] up, right? You have to be Yeah. You have to. be pristine. You can't at that point. probably have opinions. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, you can't have any. opinions. Your opinions have to be very. like bland. They have to be like, "Climate change is bad." And they shove.

you in a limo. Ham and cheese. Yeah. Peanut butter and kids should be. able to breathe. Good night. You're. like, "Okay, this guy is great.". But it's got that kind of stuff feels. like it's gotten so cornered that it's. just like it can't survive anymore. I. feel like people want There's some. people that still watch it. Trump ruined that because Trump came out. and he said whatever the hell he wanted. and there was something paradigm. shifting about that. It was. intoxicating. you're watching him and. you're like, "Here's a guy saying. whatever he wants on the national stage. in front of everybody. How can we go.

back to scripted fake crap?" How can you. go back to an interview show where a. host is like, "So, what are you doing?". And the celebrity is like, "Well, I'm. the host is like, tell us about that. time when you were in a school play and. you fell down." It's like, "No, talk. about something real." Because the. president is going off the dome, so you. need to do that, too. Yeah. Yeah. It almost has challenged entertainment. in a way. And I think entertainment. hasn't really respond like mainstream. entertainment hasn't really responded. that well. Um because they just seem to. keep playing some of the same old.

[ __ ] like I don't know. Yeah, they're doubling down. They're. remaking old shows. Comedy Central's. like we're remaking Bonanza. It's like. this is not the move, guys. It's not the. move, you know. Um, yeah, it's hard. because he can do something in his house. that gets more views and and and more. attention and more engagement than than. things that they're putting millions and. millions of dollars into. It must. terrify them, dude. It's got to be. terrifying. to them. Yeah. To them. But then also there's a.

but yeah, there's a relatability. Like I. like the fact that people that come out. to my shows and stuff, they I feel like. I they're the type of people that I. would like to meet anyway, probably be. okay with meeting because. they tune in for some reason because. they're into the same kind of stuff I'm. in or or think. It's a much better connection, man. Yeah. Much deep. You have a much deeper. connection with your fans than a movie. star does. Except for that black guy from Britain, dude. What's that guy's name? A KR1. [ __ ]. Yeah. [ __ ]. [ __ ] this [ __ ] guy. Jesus Christ. be a crazy Staple Center.

What date? November 9th. Can you jump off the ropes. so it's only punching? I can do whatever I want. Yeah, I can do whatever I want. He hit me. after the bell last time. Did he? Oh, I'm going to get [ __ ] dirty. Oh, get a louder bell. Crazy. Louder bell. Get a louder bell. So, everybody's Yeah, cuz he might have been confused. He was. probably watching Power. He got. confused. Oh, yeah. Definitely. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Um Nick, you got anything? That's it for me. Yeah. Check out Tim's podcast. Yeah. Tim Dylan show. Thanks. So funny. Tim, thank you for coming.

Thanks for having me, dude. I appreciate. it. Good to meet you, dude. Good luck, man. I know you were sick, man. And. dude, I'll fight somebody sometime, maybe on not on this underc car, but a. future one. Yeah, you could do it. Yeah, I'm I want to train and fight. someone now. I feel like we all need to. fight people. I really believe that's the only way to. really That's it. I love it. I think it's a good idea. I'm going to start training. Who should. I fight? You think. Chris? Crystalia? Yeah, maybe Chris. I could fight I I could be Crystalia if. I'm allowed to jump up and and also. punch at the same time. be allowed,

dude. Super fun. Do MMA. I'll do some good. Yeah, you're allowed, dude. And you could fight somebody, too. Dorothy. I know this lady. Um. I'll [ __ ] her up. I don't know, dude. I'll take some. pictures of her as soon as we get off. I'll fight I'll fight that. Who's the. guy? Uh the guy Frederick Douglas. Cryp. Daddy. He's in a wheelchair on Twitter. I'll fight him. I like him. He's very. funny. Is he? Yeah, he's great. I'll. fight him. All right. Here you go. All right. Now I'm just floating on the. breeze and I feel I'm falling like these.

leaves. I must be corner stone. Oh, but when I reach that ground, I'll. share this piece of mind I found. I can. feel it in my bones, but it's going to take. a little time. for me to set that parking brake. and. let myself. shine that light on me.

I'll sit and tell you my story. Shine. on me. and I will find a song. I will sing it. just for me. [Music]. Now I' been moving fast. train with a heavy load.