Season's Greetings w/ Santa | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #313
and we are here. we are here it is um friday december 1. 8 in the year 20. 20. and you know it's wild some people. thought we'd never make it to 2020 some. people. they call naysayers and that's a. naysayer. and you say it and they say nay. and that's a nice hair bruh but here we.
are. you know when we are just rambling. through time. it's kind of interesting even if i just. sit down and do nothing i'm still. traveling at the speed. of time. it's really interesting when you think. about you could lay in a bed you could. be in a damn. coma bruh you could be in a food coma. and a real coma you could have been in a.
car accident after thanksgiving and so. you double comb it. lay in there i mean just still as a damn. frozen orphan. and uh and you're still. traveling through time. you still clocking miles you know i. think it was maybe episode. 60 or something they had tiny sand who.
came through with a very with just um. [Music]. just that ear tickler that seasonal ear. tickler. from the great tiny sand who let's hear. it a little bit right now. remember that remember tiny come on. let's jingle bells.
[Music]. there he is buddy. [Music].
who could forget that man who could. forget that man and that was almost that. was probably. you know 140 episodes like 240 episodes. ago or something. jesus what have we been talking about in. here. i mean what have we been talking about. um i'm grateful to still be here with. you i'm stay i'm grateful. and i hope that you are uh i hope you're. leaning into the holidays you know i. didn't realize it was the holidays. suddenly.
and then bam bro you know. like a brother with a freaking uh you. know like a brother with a ski mask this. [ __ ] just rolls up on you. you know bam the holidays is right there. and um and suddenly here we are and it. is that time of year man. it is that time of year when you get to. feel it a little bit. and especially in such a wild year let. me play a couple of sounds that remind.
me of christmas. [Music]. that's the sound of like maybe somebody. you know somebody's just like on a. second date and they decide that they. actually like.
each other or something and they just. kind of like. you know start to they're having whipped. cream or something they put on each. other's face or something. you know and then she kind of smirks and. he kind of like maybe he hides behind a. tree or something. and then she uh you know um. spills her eggnog in the park and he's. like oh i didn't do it you know.
[Music]. so that's a little bit of christmas. right there euphoria right there that's. called a. christmas dance by arthur benson. and let's see if we get another sound. right here. oh damn this one you high as hell bro.
this one you high as hell bro that's. when you believe in um. that's when you believe you drive a. reindeer that's when you believe that. um dude the other night so i went to. this deal over here. oh a couple things happened to me so one. people's getting soft man people. is getting soft dude they not fully. baking people anymore.
some people they seem like like i was. when i was born i was baked at probably. about 450 degrees. for nine months you know i'm saying. that's how to. that that's how i rolled out of mama. but you got mfr's out here some soft. batch. cotton boys out here just. dude here's what happened so i went to. this town called. bowling green kentucky. and it is the home of a fruit of the.
loom drawers. uh so if you ever been wearing in fruit. of the looms baby you know if you ever. got your fruit all loomed up. then you know them them [ __ ] came. straight out of kentucky. that's basically kentucky that's holding. you nuts bruh. kentucky just holding your ivories bruh. gotcha. um you know it is just supporting your. low batch daddy but um. what i'm telling you is this so i went. there. to look at some different vehicles i've.
been vehicle shopping. so i decided to get me a hotel stay over. there for the for the evening. dude the guy behind i go knock on the. door of the hotel. and i understand it's core of at times. brother disease is out. so first the guy comes to the window of. the hotel the door glass door. and looks at me like i'm covered like oh. who's here is covet here like [ __ ] i'm. not covet. you know what i'm saying i'm regular. baby.
so anyway the guy it was just so. ridiculous. like looking at me like he was going to. be able to judge if i had the disease. through the glass. so anyway he left me inside and um. i was like say hey man do you guys have. a room here like yeah we got a room uh. let me go see if it's clean or not i was. like all right you know when he goes. upstairs. literally he's upstairs for probably. about 15 minutes obviously he should. have cleaned it earlier.
that's in his job description. and he didn't and how do i know that. because i've been. a lazy [ __ ] like this dude. that's why that's why i know cause i've. been that dude. i've been the dude that shows up to work. and doesn't work. and i look i did i was really good at. that. so anyway man finally he comes down.
and uh at this point i'm thinking i. might as well just i might just want to. drive back. um you know it's only like an hour and a. half to where i'm going to. back home to my place here so anyway so. whatever he's looking on the computer. and stuff and. and at a certain point i'm kind of get. i'm getting antsy you know it's been a. while and it's getting late i want to go. get something to eat and i know. restaurants are kind of closing a lot of. things closing out like eight o'clock. nine o'clock. so i'm giving him a little bit of.
pressure you know like um. you know can you can you run my card or. you know. is there anything i can do to help. saying stuff like that like a passive. aggressive. that's what they call it um. when you pretend like you are um a teddy. bear but you really a bad [ __ ] kind of. you know um. so anyway he sorry finally he goes look. i'm sorry sir. okay but i just need you to relax a. little bit i used to be in a wheelchair.
like what bro. you used to be in a wheelchair you used. to be. that's what we're doing now. people are just saying you know look hey. man. look i i used to weigh 11 pounds. nine ounces when i was born okay huh. calm down cut me some slack here.
that guy said i used to be in a. wheelchair when [ __ ] you broke your leg. once. you know you did some [ __ ] dirty. karate somewhere bruh. i just don't know it just man. don't make me hit you with that rat. jitsu bruh. tighten this white dude up. sorry man i'm sorry getting out of line. but it just man i don't know man that.
[ __ ]. i i i it just like hey. hey buddy look i had acne when i was 14. if you could give me a little bit of. room here. okay hey hey guy. you know i vomited uh in the middle of. the school play. when i was nine okay if you could just. step back and show some respect. it's just like what are we doing man. hey man i used to be in a wheelchair.
well [ __ ] then get in a wheelchair now. if you in it. you know i'm sorry man that [ __ ] just. got me heated up. like somebody just threw some damn warm. briquettes in my ass bro. you know that's where i'm at with this. [ __ ] just. hey hey man look you know i uh. i was a i was i used to be four years. old okay i was only three and a half. feet tall at one time. if you could give me a little bit of.
room here. it's just like now we're like using. whatever our weakest moment was as our. front. and i don't mind us sharing our weakest. moment man i think there's a level. of connection there there's an. opportunity you know. you know it's like we're trading. vulnerability you know. you know uh we're trading um. baseball cards there you know i'll give. you. you know i feel uncomfortable outfielder.
and you give me a um look man sometimes. i'm insecure. shortstop and you know we we recognize. each other from those spaces. but i don't know if saying like look man. you know. somebody burned my hair off once okay. could you give me a little bit of give. me some give me a moment. should just lit me up a little bit. anyway that's where i'm at man but. anyway. what i meant to say is.
we're alive for another week and this is. the surprise that god gave. us man this is it. whatever it is the good the bad the. nasty. whatever this is the this is it this is. this is the hey guess what's in my hand. and they show you this is what's behind. door number one through a jillion this. is it baby this is life.
and you know what i think we're do i. think we're doing okay with it. thank you for being here. [Music]. come on baby. i'm just sitting on your front porch. wondering how could i be. so far from my home.
come on. [Music]. [Music]. [Music].
i can feel it in my bones. but it's gonna take. a little time for me to set that parking. brake. and let myself. i'll sit and tell you my story.
[Music]. [Music]. and there you go awkward fade out begins.
upstairs um excuse me. look i used to be in a wheelchair and he. didn't even say when he was. at least tell me when when you were six. or last week. oh it's like some people was baked at. you know for 10 minutes at 100 degrees. bro. and they got all these ingredients but. they ain't got no they nothing's. holding them together you know and they.
got these soft batch out there bruh. these soft batches and that ain't us. baby. now i'm okay if we a little bit of a. toll house marshal. i'm okay if we have that element of toll. house more solidity in us. where we a little soft but we gripping. on the edges baby gang [ __ ]. um yeah so that was wild dude i and then. oh. also i went looked at a cave look bro i.
win. i gotta tell you this man oh santa's. gonna be here at the end of the episode. we got damn santa and we got a beautiful. santa man it's a. this this man has been a liaison. uh to the north pole and of. you know just the vibe of giving. and we got a natural beard santa not one. of these fake ass. you know clip-on [ __ ] we got a real.
real real man right here. we got freaking chris krangle bruh. pg baby ptl baby you know what it is. praise god praise the lord. um oh so i went to this cave right. so there's this thing if you go to. kentucky. and there is a cave there because i've. been trying to be more. outgoing when i don't want to do.
something i go do it. um the other day i didn't want to go to. jiu jitsu. went over to nashville mma. left out of there feeling like a champ. you know some. this lady put me in a sugar lock once. you know and i can't i still can't feel. two of my toes and i can't wink out of. one of my eyes but. god's plan bro um.
what else am i talking about here uh. what are we saying. man my mind gets all readily um. oh i went in a cave they got caves over. there. and a cave is just basically like a um. it's kind of like a mountain but like i. made out of air. and so i went over when i was trying to. just uh do some touristing. in this area so i go hit this cave i'm. caving.
and um well first of all at one point. they take you it's a boat you go. under this part of the ground. or or whatever it is earth rock and they. they you basically have to duck down. inside of the boat so you go first you. walk into the cave then you get in this. boat then you go down this little river. and. they uh you get down you have to go. under the rock. and you literally have to lay in the. boat like if you put your head up at all. you.
will die like there is a like. it's like 40 yards just straight right. like you can't even. i can't even believe they'll let us do. it as just a customer. you know because once i'm a customer bro. i kind of. you know i once i'm a customer dog. once i give you five or six dollars or. twelve dollars for an experience. i put my life in your hands.
i kind of check out i just assume look i. gave them nine dollars bruh. i'm gonna be safe whatever i'm doing you. know and it's a pretty sad. it's a pretty unfortunate and not very. you know it's kind of the opposite i. feel like of being like a navy seal or a. marine. it's like being like a um like a navy. skunk or something you know just. it's like i'm not really looking out for.
myself anymore you know. it's like oh look i trust you look i. gave you seven dollars here. you know you taking me into the bat. caves i'm a. trust you're gonna take care of me so. i'm like on my phone and [ __ ] i'm not. even painting and. literally almost died like so the boat. goes under the rock. we go through the cave it's nice it's. fun it's you know it's it's. it's you're kind of pretending that it's. more fun than it is. the guy's like hey here's a hole right.
here that uh. you know this hole's from 1904 you're. like holy [ __ ]. my grandfather could have seen this hole. you know just things like that you. and you you know i find myself asking. questions like. oh really that's not a question but you. know what i'm saying like. like saying things that i don't even. really want to say you know like oh wow. huh never would have thought of that.
but anyway just [ __ ] like that you know. i'm upstairs. but this this episode's really gone off. the rails man. um anyway bruh what i'm telling you is. oh at the end of the thing here's what. happened. at the end of the thing the guy says. and i want to thank you guys for coming. today and i want to also let you know. that um.
only like 30 years ago this entire cave. was filled. with trash right he this whole tour he'd. been telling us. how beautiful the cave was and the. temperature and. how there's only one fish that comes. this little fish named anna. or something lil anna show up and she's. the only one that come in the cave and. they you know where's hannah tonight. he's like shining a flashlight in the. water and all of this.
cutesy stuff you know and i'm just in. the back like you know oh really. you know just you know i'm being i'm. being a customer. i'm being a customer that's what you do. i give you seven dollars you walk me. through the thing i. say no way and we and we. and you know and i don't die and you get. me back to where we started. and we go our separate ways. maybe i buy a gift at the gift store. usually i do.
oh yeah at the very end he's like and. also i just want to thank everybody for. buying a ticket today. you know the caves used to be only 20. years ago these caves were filled. entirely to the top. with and then he started just rattling. off. just complete [ __ ] just like washers. and dryers petroleum. uh trash he's like people came from all. around to throw their trash in these. caves. he's like they even found half of a. mobile home in here. now where was the other half i don't.
know. but uh and i'm like oh really. anyway bro it was just crazy that. basically what i toured was like a. hollowed out. landfill like basically somebody tricked. me. into touring out a hollowed-out landfill. in kentucky for about 13. so anybody out there that says you can't. start a small business. man get you a shovel. and get you some [ __ ] and get you a.
square reader for your phone. and i bet you're gonna be good man. um merry christmas to you merry. christmas to you i want to let you know. that. we are celebrating this is not an ad i. mean it is but it's not but it's like. on january 15th 8 p.m. i'm gonna try and do some different. sketches and unique stuff. we're doing a live show.
myself and this woman named. chelsea lynn and she was on the podcast. and she um. plays trailer trash tammy. and i'm excited about it you know it's. going to be. live so you buy a ticket the tickets are. 10 that's a reasonable ticket. i thought about a ticket i said what's a. ticket that's reasonable i said well. look. you spin that he'll do a raffle. you know i remember when i was young um.
my grandfather won a damn wheelbarrow. and he was fired up man he pushed me. around in that [ __ ] and. and then he got to drinking really and i. never really saw him again after that. but uh but before that man uh but i'm. just saying look ten dollars is a decent. amount. but it's not a crazy amount and you can. be able to sit on your couch and watch a. live show we're putting on a show this.
is gonna be. uh theo and tammy's belated christmas. talent. extravaganza i'm producing this thing. it's going to be lights out i hope so on. hopefully the actual lights don't go out. because the one thing we need to pull it. off is electricity so you can buy a. ticket now in advance. and just remember to tune in uh. that friday evening there's nothing. going on that evening i checked. there's no big football dustin poirier. and conor mcgregor is going to fight the.
week. uh later uh so you're good. you can tune it's gonna be fun we got. some dope sketches uh we have live. talent show. um we're gonna be hosting the whole. evening uh we got some live musical. performers um. it should be similar to that show hee. haw there's an old show on youtube if. you get to check it out. h-e-e-h-a-w. um and you know what i'm looking forward. to it man. i really wanted to make it a special.
night. so i hope that you will be there uh with. me and support. um there'll be a live chat where people. can chat during it if they want to. uh and you'll also be able to watch it. for like um i think a few days. afterwards online. so um. i want to let you know right now that. 2020 was rocky. it was rocky like you nuts daddy. but it's new year new balls with our. sponsor manscaped.
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happy new year to you and your balls do. you have a hard time taking pills. i do you know i remember somebody gave. me a pill once. and uh and honestly it was my friend. billy conforto r.i.p. and he's probably was one of the. i bet he's one of the 60 or 70 greatest. uh. homosexual prize fighters that never.
fought for money honestly. and i miss him every day man and we. actually we gotta. you know we we need to we're gonna build. a bench over there in his honor. near where he lived over there in. laplace louisiana. but um he gave me a pill one time and i. drove off the road. not long after he gave it to me and. honestly i thought the dude might have. tried to give me a bj while i was passed. out but i don't think he did.
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five dollars shipping that's. b-l-u-e-c-h-e-w-dot-com. promo code theo. that's all i really know at the moment. let me thank um we had a lot of great. calls that came in we got santa's coming. santa santa's coming. dude i remember growing up in louisiana. they had a they did an event. every year and an event is like. something where you don't.
you know it's like regular time but it's. more special than that. and um they used somebody would fly. in a plane through the air around town. and they would play christmas music out. the plane. this was a small plane a crop duster. so they'd put on these jovial tunes and. they would hit the air.
and so moms they would bring us outside. on the porch about maybe 6. 40. and say do you hear it do you hear. it. and they would just be like dashing. through this you know it would be this. something you hear and it would just be. it would blow your mind. and it lifted you up with that christmas. spirit. and i thought that that was so special. that a town did that that they invested. in that sort of thing.
and i think that that's important that. kind of stuff. because that you know who knows if that. moment right there might have. you know kept the magic alive in me. and made me believe in things because. you know. santa is something you believe in but. it's something that's just your it's. just your first kind of. it's kind of like your first romance in. a weird way. you know you're hopeful and you're.
excited and there's. possibility and there's a date there's. december 25th. and it's just. you know it has all the elements of. romance but no sex. nobody getting sex. and there's something that you know. there's something special about that. because i think if you can make that. time romantic enough to a child. in an and you know or you know you know.
romance but non-sexual. you know if you can make it entertaining. enough to a child in that way then it. can um. they'll carry that same ambiance. and the same belief of possibility into. the world. in other aspects man um. i want to thank you guys for supporting. the podcast i want to thank you guys for. being a part of my life this year. and i know i say that a lot but i think. sometimes it's just hard for me to get. across um.
you know i haven't been feeling good. this year you know i have not been. feeling i say that a lot i think i might. have a pinched nerve in my neck or my. back. finally got an mri today um. but i j you know this [ __ ] sounds. freaking gay bro but it's been in pain a. lot. or not gay bro you know what i'm saying. um. painful but just kind of like. you know i sound like that dude like hey. man. i you know i used to have baby teeth if.
you don't mind look if you don't mind. bro i used to be in the third grade. okay um we had some great calls that. came in. and uh i want to thank kenny again last. week from portland who. um gave away a nice gift and promoted. others. uh to do the same thing here's a call. that came in. hello theo this is bert from the dirty. south. dirty birdie.
let's hear it baby um i was just calling. to let you know i just finished your. third place babies episode. and man that thing just blew my mind. with all the calls about the. donations for the ps5 and people were. just. reaching out to you man it really it. touched my heart really. and made my heart like blow up like you. know. like the grinch really like oh hell yeah. that's like god taking a big puff off.
that love joint and blowing that [ __ ]. right into your [ __ ]. third lung baby that love long the heart. gang. [ __ ] homework it just it warmed my chest. it's 709 in the am. down here in austin texas. and um that's joe rogan country down. there. and that wild that's joe rogan country. down there onward. i just wanted to call to let you know. how that how that made me feel. um i guess.
i kind of i guess it kind of makes me. you know it like rejuvenates my my uh. my uh my spirit like my christmas spirit. and uh i just wanted to call you and. thank you for that. and uh that's it i guess. appreciate everything you do man gang. brother. and that's not it man that's a lot you.
know you saying that is a lot. and uh you know being a man that's brave. enough to make that call and just say. hey man thank you this made me feel a. certain way. you know that means a lot that's hard to. do sometimes. um. you know as men we get so we don't get. acclimated to. letting our feelings also be a badge of. courage. or a sword or a shield you know. you know i can tell you something made.
me feel a certain way but also at the. same time. be powerful with it. you know when i think in the future. we're really going to learn and really. start to acclimate. to what these other powers we have are. even our in our own vulnerability. because i think there's a way to be. powerful and be vulnerable. but not be weak. um but thank you man that means a lot to. me that at 709 am man that.
look it all started man that guy kenny. called him wanted to be nice. dude my friend dan laganna called in the. other day he created a show called. american. vandal on um on netflix he's. uh working on this new um. the tiger king series and he's just a. talented and just a heart just a man. that's all heart bro. he must have 40 aortas bro and he called. and i didn't even know he listened to. the podcast.
and he called and he said hey man i just. want to say i listen to your episode. and if there's anything i can do to give. if there's another mom out there i can. give to let me know. and first of all it just touched me so. much that because he said hey man it. really touched me. and it just man that was you know that. was cool man first of all here's a guy. that i really admire. who's like saying man i listen to your. podcast i'm like that's so cool bro. thank you that's crazy um.
and then that he care you know just that. it made him. feel um. and i and it was just night it was just. and meant. so many people called wanting to then. give and do. something in like i don't know. there was honestly just not there was no. way to facilitate it all. there was just no way to facilitate it. all in such a last minute way. um but maybe next year we'll do like a.
platform or something. to see you know what's possible but. thank you to everybody that called i. mean. so many people called in offering to be. of help. pretty powerful man um. let's take another call right came in. right here. hey theo this is melissa from houston. and um.
i just got through listening to um the. latest podcast. um third place babies and wow. just um man that one really hit me. uh such what a great podcast. and you have the the best fans the best. audience they're so generous. um and uh just thank you for. that episode um. and i it made me think of what i could. um.
what i could give to you and. well i can't you know literally i guess. really give you anything but. um i just thought if i could give to you. for. i would give you the ability to feel. okay. and to really really feel how much. you're loved. because you are um. that's my wish for you for this. christmas holidays and it'll be in my. prayers for you. and um just thank you thank you for that.
episode it really touched me. and um and that's it. well thank you uh melissa that's sweet. of you. yeah that's that you know that's very. sweet of you and i um. and just a lot of calls came in like. that of people that just felt. just felt something man just felt. something.
you know so much so so so many times in. life man i just want to feel something. man. i just want to feel something and. life can get mundane it can get. monotonous it can get where we focused. on the. the excel spreadsheet instead of the xl. lens. that can happen between humans and. and from moments and uh.
you know thank you yeah you know i wish. i had a bottle of okay pills. that i could take in the morning. you know i've never really felt okay man. woman sorry melissa i've never. i just. you know it's funny and uh in working. with sponsors over the years and and.
working in some 12-step stuff and. a lot of times i find i would call my. sponsor and i'd say hey is everything. okay. and they're like yeah man what do you. mean. i was like it's just just tell me. everything's okay please just tell me. everything's okay. [Music]. and and they're like yeah everything's. fine man. everything is fine. and i think i just never you know i. never heard that i never heard that. growing up nobody was around i said hey. man everything's okay. everything is okay so i always was just.
frenetic it was like. i was always this loose wire that had. come down in a storm and no one ever. addressed it really and it's nobody's. fault it's just. it's just you know that's how i was and. i'm not sad about it or anything i'm. just. you know being okay was never something. that. i was uh so that's sweet of you. you know and maybe that's a night that'd. be a nice new year's resolution for me.
to just think about. everything's okay. and if you need to hear that. you know my friend bill morris man he's. a white guy. and uh which is easily to be expected. from the name bill morris. but he texted me um this is probably a. year ago. and it just said hey it just said. everything is okay. and i talked to him few days later i.
said hey man why did you send that what. was going on. he just said hey i just i had a feeling. maybe you were. in a space where you didn't know if. everything was okay and so i just wanted. you to know it was and so i just that's. what i sent. and i was like man it's so funny because. right when i read it i was like. all right bro all right and everything. is gonna be okay. and so i'm telling you that you know if. you years been choppy or if you. you know you don't know if you're doing.
okay raising your kid or if you. um. if you don't know if you're loved or if. you don't know if. man i don't know [ __ ] got me feeling. some type of way now. yeah if you don't know if everything's. gonna be okay i'm just. i'm sending you this audio text right. now and just saying hey bro.
you know everything everything is going. to be okay. you're doing good. you know you're okay as you are. damn bro i'm gonna get. i'm gonna hear about this at jiu-jitsu. bro but. but uh but no for real man you you know. you're doing good if you don't know if. you're a good brother you don't know if.
you're a good boyfriend you don't know. if you're a good husband. you don't know if you're a good wife you. don't know if you're a good human. you don't know if you really have any. relationship with god but you know he's. looking for you any of that. like like i'm not here to give you any. message i'm just letting you know that. you know wherever you are is you're okay. you know and that everything is going to. be fine.
um and i don't even know why i'm saying. that right now i just but i feel. some type of way bro and i feel really. compelled. to say that so praise god man. but thank you melissa. yeah i i i. i think my whole life i've just had to. try to be. something because i never knew what i. was.
and i you know and and and. there and and i used to feel sad about. that sometimes but now it's like look. that's. that's how you get different things. that's how you get art. that's how you get things. perspectives um. but thank you for those warm wishes. melissa that's really sweet of you. uh let's hear what else we got here um.
we got a couple of other honestly some. of these are just nice messages. that came in and so i'm gonna play some. of them and then we got santa's gonna be. in here in about 10 minutes bruh. freaking santa. can you believe it. hi fear um my name is renee i'm from. brisbane australia. hello renee and thank you for calling. here from brisbane. and god i love australia man.
sorry i was just imagining me just. really [ __ ] australia bro because i. just. love it onward um i was just calling to. say um. in your last episode you gave away that. ps5 and it prompted you to. give to some other single moms like the. gift card and. the xbox maybe um yeah we did we. followed up with those moms and carried. through with those things. um and i know you're not taking me to.
task i just wanted listeners to know. uh and you know what i'm gonna hit up a. few more some other people some other. people did submit people i'm gonna i'm. gonna hit up a few more tomorrow and. just see what else we can do um. you know and and i wish i i wish i had. known how much outreach there was going. to be an offers for help because i would. have. planned ahead and had somebody you know. on staff to help more maybe nick can. help out and. we can get sean help out here onward i'm.
sorry to interrupt you renee. and i just wanted to let you know it's. really. inspired me to put in a bit more effort. this christmas. help a few more people out like i think. we all. sometimes get stuck in our own bubble. and we just want to help ourselves. um but yeah you've. made me realize. there's more out there and it's. been great it's yeah.
seeing people smile makes me smile. you know um i do know. you know i i i really can relate to that. it's so funny. uh so often like i just never. i've never been a big. you know i've always been an envious. when i'm doing uh. stand-up which seems like doesn't even.
exist anymore but. i've always been envious of the crowd. i've always been envious i just want you. know i want to sit there and i want to. man they're having fun they're laughing. you know i just always i think i think. what i wanted to be the most i wanted to. be that person in the crowd. but i just have never been really good. i've just never been good at having that. much.
joy. um i'm always so concerned i'm always. scared. you know my best friend uh growing up. this fellow will teague man and he's a. you know if they ever if they ever make. a space shuttle that's taking people. directly to heaven and they put two. people in and he should damn be one of. them but. um. you know he i grew up always at his. house and i got to see his mother years. later and she said you were always such.
a scared. kid and i said dang man was i. um but anyway uh. going back to what you said there renee. um yeah i always i've always admired the. people in the crowd that were having a. good time i always wanted to be them. but the only way i could get to even. close was to be the person. saying stuff to get people to laugh. you know it was like the closest i could. get was man maybe if i create enough of.
that i'll i'll become it. um and there's probably more in there. but look that all started with kenny. from portland. so you pinning the tail on the wrong. donkey. hey theo this is kenny calling from. portland uh. i had an idea here i have a playstation. 5 that i got from my work. uh i'm not really a big gamer right. there. but i can relate to you renee when you.
say you know i i'm not like you know i. feel so sad. a couple of months ago this company sent. me a sweatshirt. same company that sent me this switch or. feet it's called and they got nice. sweatshirts and. they're pricey though it's a pricey. piece man i mean it's cheaper to. probably buy a damn lamb and hang it off. your arms you know. or carry it around your damn neck or you. know get a [ __ ] thick sheep and carry. that [ __ ] on you. but um but they sent me some sweaters. and one of them i knew it wasn't my. style. and i knew i didn't want to wear it and.
i thought maybe i you know you know who. would really look good in this i thought. was. there's a woman who cleans my apartment. she comes once a week. and that's okay and she's awesome she's. honestly so awesome. and i look forward to her coming she. speaks spanish i get to practice spanish. with her. and she brings her kids sometimes and. they're beautiful kids and they're funny. and. it's like this little connection i have. to like um. they're from central america it's like. this little connection i have like to my. father sometimes and.
um and i knew. immediately i knew man i should just. give that to her i'm never gonna where i. should just get and i didn't. you know and that's fine it's okay i'm. not crying about this whatever but it's. like. i i just i want to get to the place in. my life where i trust. every little instinct that says give. this give this do this. to give this i want to be able to. be that. whatever that is.
you know whatever that is i just that's. what i want to be. man um. but thank you man i look all of us have. been affected by kenny's generosity. and that's pretty dope insurance can be. complicated. and that's why the zebra was created. when you use the zebra.com insurance. finally feels like it's in black and. white. no more confusion just honest rates from.
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call what's up theo this is shane from. california. um sugar shane baby. and i know a couple shanes was gay men. that i knew. and i'll be honest with you brother and. i'm not saying anything and it doesn't. matter. doesn't matter who you love shane but a. lot of times a gay man will have the. name. shane and they call him sugar shane.
onward i was just calling to uh. talk to you about something my son. wanted to talk to me about last night he. comes in from the cul-de-sac. playing with all the kids and he says. dad i need to talk to you. can you come back to my room and i said. yeah cause he's got younger brothers. and he said dad is uh santa claus real. now he's a fifth grader so.
maybe he should already know maybe not i. don't remember when i found out. but he heard through the word. of the cul-de-sac that that's sackchat. they call it. gang bro santa claus wasn't real. so he told me he wanted me to be real. with him. and i was real with him and i damn is he. a little brother dog he wants you to be. real with him. praise god baby onward laid it down and.
he i could see a little bit. of the little boy. kind of seep out of him a little bit. you know with that santa magic. disappearing. um damn you hit him with the damn truth. huh. it was kind of a. uh it was a real it was a real.
conversation. and um anyways with christmas coming. uh i thought there might be a lot of uh. conversations like the one i had with. uh other people's kids um. anyways i hope you have a good christmas. out there in. nashville tennessee. thanks brother amen man i appreciate it. and thanks for the call and. you know uh.
i remember somebody told us santa died. when i was young. and god. god it was hell man and i remember our. neighbors even at one point tried to do. a thing where they buried a fake santa. like they. did a damn fake funeral and had a little. bit of like a santa a little. you know like a fat sleeve hanging out. that [ __ ] or whatever. you know half a gift you know quarter of. a uh. you know teddy ruxman.
um you know or you know one you know. they have you know some damn voltron or. something hanging out that [ __ ] and. they say santa's dead you know. or something so yeah there was a lot of. staged things going on people trying to. save money parents. you know somebody a parent would spend. all the money on dope. and then they'd do a fake fire and throw. a half a santa suit in it. see how damn santa [ __ ] you know.
cooked himself off doing. you know doing dope or whatever um. but we talking about man uh. oh yeah it's hard to tell them i think. it's hard to tell because i don't have. any kids you know. i need to have a damn kid soon but what. i am telling you is this man um. that. i think a way to tell them is. say look santa's alive as long as you.
want him to be alive. and the second you quit believing in him. he doesn't exist anymore. because that because then i feel like. you might be setting them up for a good. metaphor in the in their growing lives. now whatever you put your faith in. whatever you really. practice and you put your energy into. it could be meditation it could be. loving your spouse.
it could be you know aiming to be a. better parent. it could be um learning art. it could be stand-up comedy it could be. anything. if you keep believing in it. then it has a life. if you keep practicing it. then it has an existence.
things aren't just alive out there. we have to make them happen whether they. be dreams. whether they be visions whether they be. businesses whether they be love. whether they be. whether they be anything. you know whatever you focus on grows. baby and.
and i'm not preaching at you i'm not i. mean it's some of this stuff i'm just. you know. it's the stuff we kind of always talk. about in here and i don't even know why. we do sometimes but that's okay. and and this is our world. and uh but look i i applaud you for. being there in that moment and staying. in the moment. some dads would throw a beer at the kid. you know or go piss and never come back. say i'ma tell you when i go. i'm gonna go piss i'm gonna tell you. when i get back you know.
but you being honest you're being honest. dad. but yeah the second that you whatever it. is in the world if you keep the magic. alive the magic stays alive. so we can take that out into the world. man. look there's some other great calls that. came in and i want to get to some of. them um. but santa claus is coming to town. and uh you know i'm excited man.
i'm excited they did that in my small. town somebody went out of their way to. do something special to make me feel as. a kid for. probably extra years that santa was. reeling who knows. would hearing that sleigh go by in this. in the sky made me. do or made me feel or made me believe. who knows. who knows the residual effect of taking. a little bit of time out. and making somebody feel good or doing.
something extra. who knows baby. you better watch out you better not cry. you better watch out i'm telling you now. santa claus is coming. to town. he sees you when you're sleepy. he knows when you're out late.
he knows if you've been bad or. good so you better give him a break. oh jingle bells jingle bells. jingle all the way. oh what fun it is to ride in a one-horse. open sleigh. shorty work work work. damn sorry that song just obviously took. a detour into.
atlanta today's episode is brought to. you by. magic mind you know it's the alternative. it's the alternative to uh. energy uh to five hour energy. you want a flow state it's it's the flow. state you want. it's the ability to create flow state in. your life. you know take having coffee in the. morning having a a. you know a monster energies and that's. crazy pouring [ __ ] frankenstein right. now you throw you pouring dracula right.
down your throat. try magic mind it's the alternative. it's the organic five-hour energy it is. you can create your own flow state help. yourself be your best self magic mind. dot co use promo code theo for 10. off all right let's get to the guest now. uh today's guest. needs no introduction um. and you know i don't even know how we. get introduced to this man in our lives.
but we're so very grateful that he. exists. and he's here today with us this is the. man himself the stepson of father time. mr k kringle they call him up in the. hood baby. kris kringle santa claus. i'll sit and tell you my stories.
[Applause]. yeah cause i'm just like do you even get. cell service like if you're in. the sky uh i do. my sleigh and reindeer are all fully. equipped with. all the latest technology really you. guys got like the technology package oh. absolutely. we were retrofitted about uh four years.
ago. wow that's wild um has there been like. um. like this year has it been a lot scarier. for kids to like request. gifts has there been like a lot less. interaction like what's it been like for. you like interacting with the kids. well for me where i'm at four days a. week. it's same business as usual however. there are some parents that. want their children to steal socially. distance so we put them on the bench. seat that i normally would sit on.
and then behind it we have a little. fireplace and a christmas tree. and i hide behind the christmas tree and. then i peek out and. i do a sh or a surprise face look. type of thing i love that so that works. out fine and some of them they'll do. the first picture while they're sitting. on my lap with their mask on and then. they'll take the mask off after that. that way they want to. i guess chronologically capture the 20. 20 moment you know. are some kids more special than others.
santa do you think. well there are special needs children. yeah and they come and see me all the. time too. and they're the they're very around me. pardon me you mean like year-round. year-round see because i am santa. and i am naturally fat and i have white. hair and a white beard. uh children come up to me all the time. during the year well. if i'm out grocery shopping or we're out. at a restaurant or someplace like. sometimes even when i'm in the gas. station.
yeah filling up the vehicles uh oh yeah. if i've been sniffing gas i'll accuse. somebody of being santa that's for sure. so i always uh have little coins or. trinkets or things of that sort i'll. spend a moment or two talking with them. and then i'll give them something. um how did the spirit of christmas kind. of start like in your heart and stuff. like that. yeah i've always loved children okay and. that's the main reason that i do this. is to uh so the children who will have. the best experience with santa's. possible each year.
one of the early macy's uh. new york city santas his name was. charles w howard. and he's famous for having quoted the or. creating the quote he airs. who thinks santa enters through the. chimney. santa enters through the heart and. that's very very true. yeah i guess there's a there's an. element of just keeping that alive in. children huh keeping that. that that ability for anything to be. possible. sure everything's possible yeah yeah do.
you feel like a responsibility whenever. you see the kids like um. do you feel some like uh is it hard to. gear up and just show up every day and. be. santa uh the season does get long. uh and mrs claus is always ready for it. to end cause she does a lot to help me. get ready every day oh does she really. oh yeah. she curls my hair and my beard with. little mini hot rollers ooh. damn and uh from the time i get into the. shower.
till the time i walk out the front door. it's. about a two-hour process 45 minutes of. which i'm sitting there with these. curlers everywhere. and where'd you meet your mrs claus at i. met mrs claus in virginia beach. oh yes and it's been 33 years. since then we've been married and will. um. will mrs claus kind of uh does she have. like a favorite meal that she prepares. for you kind of. yes cookies all the time cookies really.
so that's not just a myth right no. that's not a myth. i love every kind of cookie there is so. when a children ask me what's my. favorite cookie. i say i love all the cookies i've never. met a cookie i didn't like. now was there um was there ever a time. where there was i heard like. rumors and stuff that there was a time. where some of the reindeer wasn't. you know there was like some of them was. kind of struggling doing.
you know not drugs but like just. struggling with stuff that they were. going through was there ever a time. where they were going to replace some of. the reindeer. well we're always have reindeer in. training okay. for example this year i've got two. reindeer. that are hoping to make santa's reindeer. team next year and their names are holly. and jolly. oh really oh yeah okay they're working. hard. a couple max preps out there i like that. so they're kind of on the uh junior. varsity right there on the junior. varsity that's right.
and so what kind of training and stuff. do they have to do for reindeer because. i imagine like at some point part of the. element is you grant them the ability to. fly. well that's through waffle dust you. don't know what waffle dust is. well let me tell you i think it's. probably the reason i've lived as long. as i live. a lot of people think that i go to. deliver all the toys in 24 hours. they think that i go around the world. this way. east to west east to west east to west.
but i don't i go. north to south north to south and every. time. i get back to the north i land at the. north pole. people don't realize it there's so many. good children. in the world now and it takes so many. toys to take care of them. i can't have a sleigh large enough to. haul all those so you got to make all. those trips so we make all those trips. there's in. in the world there's 24 time zones and. we do. one time zone every hour that's how we.
can do the whole world in 24 hours. and when we land at the north pole. here's what happens. three things they always come out and. put all kinds of more toys in the slate. mrs claus meets me at the sleigh uh. and gives me some coffee or a hot. chocolate or cider or something like. that. she'll prep you up she'll kind of keep. your morale up and. this special elf that we have who. has the formula to make waffle dust she. comes out. and one of the things that she does.
before we take take off again. is she hovers and she sprinkles waffle. dust all over the reindeer. oh yeah and all over the sleigh and then. right there. beside me on the sleigh is a giant bag. of waffle ducks. damn right okay because i'll tell you. what. i traveled some of the places in the. world and the. weather's just terrible i mean it's. really really bad. yeah and you don't want santa and the. sleigh sliding off these. icy roofs so what we do is we circle the.
house sprinkle a little waffle dust on. it. and that way the reindeer have sure. footing whenever they land. i like that yeah it's great here's a. question that came in for you right here. santa here's a question from one of our. listeners what's up theo what's up maul. santa. just taking a dump right now oh one to. ash. mall santa sir what is the rowdiest. uh kid you ever had on what did they ask. for what did they do. and uh in general how do you deal with.
the situation like that. um especially with parents there uh. what are you doing so gang gang take. dumps. jesus well the rowdy children uh. i talk with them a little bit about not. being as rough and tumble as they are. that that's just a big show that they're. trying to put on. okay and as far as the children that ask. for everything because i have some. children. they bring the whole toys r us book or.
whatever whatever are they getting their. toys out of. and they're being greedy oh yeah they're. being greedy and so what i tell them i. said. now if the last little boy or girl that. had come to see me. who asked for everything if i said okay. i'll bring you everything. then you wouldn't get anything because. it'll all be gone so we all have to. share in this world. and what do kids want over the years. what have you noticed that children. really want them. is there a couple of common gifts that.
really stand out. well over the breadth of time i know. each year there's kind of a novel gift. believe it or not every year i get a. bunch of requests. for pogo sticks are you serious oh yeah. i do wow and sometimes i get i don't get. so much anymore hula hoops. yeah but i get even this year i probably. had 20 or 30 children come and ask me. for. pogo sticks and is there do you go ahead. sir and of course there's a lot of. children that want the. the uh nerf guns okay and that's fine.
and uh and if somebody wants a regular. gun did you help them with that or is. that you. tell them i cannot legally bring them. a real gun because they're not old. enough i see okay. i see and uh what's the oldest person. that's ever sat on your lap probably 102. years old. no way oh yeah i've had them all the way. from. three days old to 102 102 how long was. that line to see i wonder huh. well you know in the malls there's a lot.
of long lines. okay so i try to move along fairly. quickly. and um what did the 102 year old want. for kristen do you remember. she just wants to be able to see 103. so she just wants a little bit of time. she wants a little bit of time. what's some of the cuter answers that. little children have given you over the. years you think has it been. well i've had some uh. come and pull on my beard and then. realize it's real and run off.
sometimes they may have a sudden. expletive or two on the way out. oh yeah yeah uh i had one little girl. who uh she was probably. maybe six years old and i asked her what. she wanted for christmas. and she said cole and i looked at her i. said you want cole. and i looked at her mother who was. standing there beside her. i said to her why do you want coal.
and she says diamonds she made the. connection that if you crush cold. you'll get diamonds out of it she's that. long-term thinker and her mama. clapped her hand and said that's what. i'm talking about girl okay. so she think he'd drop her off a bag of. briquettes huh yeah. dang man some of these women starting to. think long term. you know they are that's one way to do. it um. do you remember me when i was a kid or. no oh i do you were quite a handful in. was i yeah.
but you had fun you turned out pretty. good thank you i would imagine in the. north pole there can be a lot of like. things get to seclusion. and even you know in cold temperatures. people suffer from depression sometimes. in isolation. you know and eventually even sometimes. alcoholism drug use do you guys see any. of that up there we don't have any. alcoholism and drug use but what we do. is we have one of them blue light things. that's supposed to help raise your mood. all the time so we have that. oh dang bring me one of those i'll tie. it around my neck.
that's what i need now do some kids some. kids freak out when they see you santa. some kids can't handle it. a lot of time you'll see uh you know. mothers will put a picture of their. child crying on santa's lap what's going. on there. what is it well some of them cry a lot. some of them will cry a little bit and. some of them will just have a. total meltdown how do you handle that. though like what do you do at that. moment. well here's what i do i if they put them. on my lap and they start to cry. i'll hold them as close as i can so they.
won't hurt themselves trying to get off. and that type of thing. and then at the very end before i let. the child down. i'll also cry too. because that makes a good picture for. for the parents yeah. and then i'll put the child down and. sometimes the photographer will take a. picture of the. child leaving yeah with fear on their. face sometimes. now there's a lot there's like uh. there's over the years you see a lot of. uh santas that get. you know they show them like on bad.
santa drinking alcohol and stuff like. that do you. ever have you have you ever had to use. uppers or downers or side splitters or. whatever to really. uh get through the work week no not at. all amen brother. amen and is it ever do you see it in the. industry though. no i don't i haven't seen it uh not in. the real bearded santas that i see. is there a lot of kind of not beef on. the streets but is there like a lot of. like discrepancy between fake bearded. and real bearded sanders to me there is.
well there's something not real there's. just. there's a difference in the professional. now professionality of them. now there are people men who have. well there's called designer beards okay. these are made out of either real human. hair. or sometimes yak hair and once they're. put on properly you can't tell that it's. not. a real beard really okay and there's. some people that it's called designer. beards. okay now those sandals are just as.
professional as. the rest of us that have real beards uh. it is the this is the sands that have. the fake bellies and the fake beards and. the fake wigs. that are uh. of poor quality that tend to be the ones. that you have problems with. yeah yeah i think people that aren't in. it for the real. that aren't in it that aren't fully in. the heart got to be in the heart if you. don't have it in the heart. the children will see right through you.
wow yeah. yeah if you somebody's getting all. yacked out on that yak i think that. would be. uh that's interesting how nice is yak. here is it pretty nice. oh yeah and it's expensive too it's like. uh. uh two to four thousand dollars. for a good beard and. wig set um. dang that's very expensive that's pricey. man. i don't know where you would get a yeah. i don't even know if they still make. yaks anymore i don't know it's like oh.
yeah they are. and there are people who service. the santa industry with suits. all kinds of other stuff that santa's. need as well as. beards and wigs if they need those um. where are some of the places you've been. stationed at over the years santa like i. know in since. in santa's line of work there's a lot of. places you get called on to serve. basically. it's almost like the military in a weird. way it's almost like the um. it's like the military of the heart you.
know uh especially around the holiday. times. where are some places you got called on. to to survey well i've been. in orlando florida i've been in wichita. falls texas. i've been in baton rouge louisiana. i've been in novi michigan which is. north and east of detroit a little bit. i've been in modesto california wow. it's a lot actually been in nashville. yeah at cool springs galleria mall on.
07.08. how was that was that fun it was a lot. of fun i bet that was a. big time too that was before too much. technology when people were still really. i think there's a little bit more. christmas spirit out there sometimes one. of the people that came to see me and i. did not realize who she was at the time. and one of the elves working on the set. said do you know who that was. and i said no that was hannah montana no. way. miley cyrus wow and i did not realize it.
at the time. would she ask for do you remember no i. don't i'm sorry. well whatever it was it seemed like she. got it because she's been having yeah. she's had everything she's had. everything here's a question right here. from a young lady. hey theo hey mall santa hello my. question is what's the nastiest thing. that. has ever happened to you as a mall santa. baby barf you know dog poop what is it. what's the nastiest thing that's ever. happened. yeah do you ever is there ever accidents. with like children if they i'm sure huh.
i've been fortunate over the years i've. not had too many. accidents happen while they're in my lap. but uh. from time to time a child will well. especially the really small ones not the. not the older the not the two or three. year old who's. who is uh scared they never vomit or. anything at least not. that's not been my experience sometimes. the little bitty ones that i hold yeah. the one with the head. a little bit okay ah.
i've had a few children pee on me. oh wow uh especially if they get excited. now that's sometimes. we're out on your chest or where no. right here on your lap. and what'll happen is uh they'll get. excited. and then they just it just cuts loose. that's all there is. i guess the other if you want to call it. a nasty thing from time to time. especially. when you're towards the end of the. season and the lines are long.
and people have had to wait in line a. long time and their children. will end up wetting themselves. what upsets me is when the parent. knows it but doesn't tell me they just. plop the child down because i have what. i call. pee pads that i could put on my lap to. keep my. suit from getting wet and as well as to. keep other children who sit there. afterwards from getting wet. safe yeah if they would just say. something wow. yeah i was wondering what you would do. so i guess you'd put a pad out or put.
some flour out or something. you no what i do i have little red p. pads so it matches my. oh you guys think of everything santa i. have to. what's up all santa and theo gang gang. what's up. here's a question from all santa what's. the um. the worst gift that a child's ever asked. for where you thought to yourself. there's no way i'm getting you that. all right thanks for taking the time. today thank you merry christmas man. that's interesting yeah what.
is it what's what's one of the gifts. you're like that's impossible or that's. not. even i always am careful about when. children are asking. for gifts i never promise that. i'll bring them ex gifts. i'll tell them i'll see what i can do. and i always. am looking to make sure that. what they're asking for is age. appropriate yeah. because sometimes they're wanting the. same thing that. an older sibling has but they're not.
ready for that. gift yet do kids ever ask for are like. teenagers ever asked for anything that's. like perverse kind of like and you're. kind of like. you can't have that no teenagers. actually are. are mostly pretty good when they come to. see santa. the reason they're there is mom wants. that picture with santa. every year i've had some people. that have been coming to see me 40 and. 50 years. wow they really coming every year.
to get that picture so they can give it. to their mom one year i was at. uh when i was at cool springs there was. a ups. guy who delivered to the mall on the. very last day of the season. he and his son who also works for ups. would come and get that picture so they. could give it to his mom. and his son's grandmom oh that's cool. yeah. so there's a lot of people a lot of. there's a lot of tradition people come. through. to have a part of this same tradition. and stuff like that um have there ever.
been a proposal in front of you. i probably had a half a dozen of them. over the years. yeah and now how does that usually go. down when it happens do they let you. know in advance. is it kind of uh does the is it a man. always proposing. uh all the ones i've had have been men. proposing to women. uh we've done it a bunch of different. ways. when i was in novi michigan. i was in kind of the center part of the. mall.
and up above on the second floor was a. caged jeweler. and this young lady was sitting on my. lap. and her soon-to-be husband was up at. cage jeweler. and he came out to the to the uh. edge there and hot looked down. and hollered to us will you marry me. [Laughter]. and then he came on down the stairs in a. hurry and came to the set. and gave her the ring oh that's cool.
another thing i've had was. they would come to the set ahead of time. and they would give me the ring and i. would have it in my pocket. and then they would be sitting on my lap. and. and i would always ask the woman what. she wanted for christmas and then i. would ask the guy what. he wanted for christmas and a lot of. times the guy would say this woman here. is the love of my life and i'd really. like to marry her. but things are really hard right now and.
so i can't get her a ring. so then i'll reach in my best pocket and. i'll say well just a second. i think i may have something that'll. help you out and. of course give it to him and he opens it. up and. she's all a gas you know uh wow that's. the magic right there huh. and i'll tell you another thing that's. happened is uh birth announcements. okay i've had several people bring. with them uh to see me and they will. bring the sonogram. of the ultrasound that they had taken.
and get you to autograph it or something. no i would hold it up they would be. sitting here and i would hold it up and. we'd be smiling and i would kind of. point at it yeah. yeah and people think you're the dad no. no no no. they don't i don't think they think that. but anyway would look. dude if santa was my dad you know. excited. if you would be like what does your dad. do like uh he works at the bank i'm like. oh my dad. santa my dad santa wow that's pretty. magical so. there's really an element too of your. job where it's just people where you.
there's moments where you're really. involved in the magic of life. yes that's awesome man it's a lot of fun. i bet that's really awesome has there. been anybody that's come to see you. that's kind of been on their way out of. the world you know that's leaving life. and they wanted to come see santa one. more time. yes it's not so much. older people but it is. parents who bring their child who has a. terminal illness.
and i always have a special bell. that i give to children like that and. about eight years ago i had given one to. this little. girl she had spina bifida and some other. problems going on in about uh. this was early in the season and. probably about a. week or 10 days later.
the mom comes back and she's just. bawling in tears and then i realize who. she was. and she came back to tell me that her. child had died. and she buried her child with that bell. that i had given her. yeah it's interesting uh i think people. you you know they look to santa. i think as like a symbol of like hope. and. oh yeah love you know a symbol of magic. you know a symbol of what else uh could.
be out there that we don't know. from time to time usually five or six. times a year. i will have a child come to me and tell. me santa. i don't want you to bring me anything. this year. i want my friend or my cousin or my mom. or my dad to get. a special christmas is that pretty. remarkable when you see that when a kid. asks yeah. and here's what i do first of all. if you think about children most. children are takers.
they take stuff they want stuff given to. them oh yeah. they're very very few children that are. what i call. giver children they want to give to. other people. they don't want something for themselves. so when i when. that child when i see that child. and we're done with the visit i bring. the parents in. or the parent if there's only one that. came with them and i'll say do you know. what your child your little girl your. little boy asked me for.
and they'll say no and i said. i'll then tell them the story of what. the child asked me for. and about half the time the parents will. know that they have. that that child's a giver child wow. about the other half of the time. the parents had no idea but they're. thrilled. that their child is that way. and i said i said and that's when i make. the. the gift of the bell to the child i have. the parent and the child there and i'm. explaining to them what's.
what's transpired and i'll tell the. child that every time you ring that bell. i'll be thinking about you oh i love. that yeah. you know there's something special about. just being that uh it's almost to get. like you're like a middle man for um. yeah it's like you're like a middle man. for some of the joy that's out in the. world. right it must feel pretty interesting. sometimes it is it's it's a. it's a lot of responsibility but. it's uh gratefully accepted.
responsibility. amen yeah yeah i bet to just to have to. be able to be like at work and have a. few moments like that. some people don't have moments like that. in their job their entire lives you know. so to be able to have that and then also. uh not only just like take it and. be like this is what i'm doing but take. it and just act the part. of being kind of just part of the. current right of whatever that good. energy is and i've had children as well. as adults. that asked me to pray with them and i. will pray with them.
right there right there on the set. before they leave amen. are there a lot of good kids out there. you think oh yeah there are a lot of. great children out there. i like your attitude anything else we. got for santa sean. man santa we know you're so busy you. know. and we just thank you so much for. stopping by um. is there any other messages you have for. the kids out there i just want you all. to be happy with everything i bring you. and love what the elves have made you. take really good care of it because it.
takes them a long time to make that. stuff. merry christmas let's uh. finish out this episode and i want to. wish everybody a merry christmas. and uh and i mean that from the bottom. of my heart and. um thank you for helping me be a part of. this and being a part of my life. and i mean that and um and i love you. and be good to yourself because you. deserve it. and i'm gonna try to do the same thing.
and may we all. just have a be headed towards a. wonderful new year amen. all right let's go out um. on this lovely special by dusty. dex. um that ain't doing it for me so let's. go out on this special by timothy.
in finite joy to the world. [Music]. okay none of this that's awesome let's. go out. um by. uh oh come all ye faithful. by grigori david. and there you go that's trappy right. [Music].
there. in the background. [Music]. i hope your new year is a remix i really.
do. you guys be good man.
