Round Italian | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #317

you know it baby you know it and you. don't isn't that fascinating. um you know i remember when i was young. they had a fella in my neighborhood this. little boy named little allen. and god damn he was small brother he. couldn't even he he he couldn't even put. a large grape in his mouth. i mean he yeah yeah he had to shove it. in.

and he was on every prayer list my god. he was just. a young fellow just monopolized. prayerless around every day every prayer. list allen allen. allen hugging and alan times too. just man so many prayers went up for. small island man and. you know i'm thinking about him i know. uh that actually today is his birthday. and that is january 14.

in the year 2021 that's where we are. i don't know i i don't know if you're. bill or ted. but we're in the future i don't know if. your tamara. i don't know hell i don't know who you. are because i don't know you. i do not know you. but it's a wild one out there man they. need to start making underpants thicker. because. [ __ ] is getting real.

let's get into it. [Music]. come on thinking oh there's no way he's. going to play it again huh. well. i'm just sitting on your front post. wondering how could i be so far. from mine oh come on. tell them travis and my mind is.

somewhere else but when i. find it i'll patch up where it's been. come on baby. now i'm just floating on the breeze. [Music].

come. [Music]. a little on. for me to set that parking brake and. let myself unwind shine that light on. me. [Music]. i'll sit and tell you my stories.

[Music]. and that you know that's bishop gun. shine. and you want to put somebody in your. prayer let's put that band on it right. there. you know they got so close to uh real. stardom they really got close to it. and it really and and it fell apart.

you know it's hard to it's hard to you. know they really had it for a moment i. mean they had it them boys they were. opening up for the rolling stones there. and that's not a geometric deal that is. a famous musical. act or you know group talent quadrant. and um and um. and they were opening up for them and. damn dallas. one of the probably 15 20 biggest cities.

opening up for the roast toes baby. and they let it all fall through the. fingers man. but for a moment for a moment they had. it. you know it's interesting to think. sometimes how small a moment is. you know there's moments in my life. where i want to. [Music].

you know i just want to hold on to it i. want to you know want to capture the mo. i want to. it could be a birthday party. and you blowing out a candle when you. seeing that flame go out and you catch. the eye of a real fine. match in the d stunts. and you want that moment to last you. want to know hey baby. i'm [ __ ] cutting the flame off these. [ __ ]. off these confectioners right here off. these sugar [ __ ] squadrons baby i.

you know i got us you want to look her. in the eyes and say look. there's more sweet where this came from. yeah. you know and you want to hold that. moment. remember when i was young when i was a. child they had um. a little area by us it was a little. preschool. and my mom said point blank you want to. go to preschool and i said do i have to. go she said no.

and i said well let me up in that [ __ ]. let me see what they doing in that [ __ ]. now let me see what they doing in that. [ __ ]. damn mom. and i went in and they wasn't doing much. they let anybody in preschool. now college is different you got a test. to get into it. but for preschool you just gotta have. some mfr drop you off before 7 a.m. that was the only you know.

that was the act that was it could you. get out of a station wagon. before 7 a.m. then you qualify. and we we'd get in there we sit on the. carpet. they had a square carpet and it had all. the numbers and letters on it. or at least most of them i didn't know. all of them. i probably knew to about l. and they had definitely one through zero.

on it going up to nine and then. zero and people would sit there and add. one television they played different. cartoons on it they played uh. um gummy bears on it. and gum now it's a damn sugar treat when. i was young gummy bears was a damn. hell it was a [ __ ] it was a program. these were you know these were. as a child you thought maybe you might. meet them one day in the woods.

and now it's a damn you know it's. something they sell you know it looks. like a damn bait. they sell it you know they sell it at. the checkout but. you know it's a basic snack it's barely. a damn sugar snack. [ __ ] looks japanese really. but we enjoyed that man gummy bear. but we would sit there and some kids. would piss themselves some kid didn't. even know how to work their bladder. their parents would bring them there and. they'd just piss out.

unbelievable. and i remember outside in the schoolyard. there they had a little somebody cut. down a tree. and about three feet of it left up out. of the ground. and i remember one kid ran and jumped. over it. this little fella named mikey and they. called him roger but. his name was mikey but they called him. roger. but um he ran and jumped over it and i.

thought i can do that. i could run and jump over that. but i didn't really have the same. gymnetics. i'd never seen gymnetics as mikey roger. baby and i. you know you know my my father was in. his 70s my mother was delivered cookies. at the time. and uh you know that's not the real. makeup of a damn. preschool gayle sayers. so i ran i jumped and.

at the time i barely had a real. i mean i barely had an earl grey of a. nut sack. and it caught on to the damn you know. whatever tree that was and somebody had. undeniably cut the tree down for. christmas it was. this was right after christmas and. somebody cut that [ __ ] down and got it. home and realized it was like a damn. hickory or a baby maple. and said f it and just put it in the.

yard but um. but damn boy if i didn't snag. the lord's eyelid baby in my nutsack on. that thing and. and that hurt man um. but yeah you know that's preschool and. it's. uh it's hit or miss baby it's hit or. miss. what's going on with you guys oh i gotta. tell you we have the.

and i'm excited thank you guys for being. here today um. fresh off that dust emporia episode. i think i realized i i've just i turned. into too much of a dustin. fan to maybe talk with him sometimes i. just such a. you know i'm just a fan of so much of. who he is as a person. and uh and as a friend he's been a good. friend to me and. um you know we've we've kind of we've. developed a friendship over the years.

some and. i'm not going to say we're best friends. or nothing like dad do because you know. uh. i'm an adult and we don't really have. best friends at this age but um. but he you know obviously i'm a fan. undeniably. and i'm just excited for him and it was. just i was just so. excited to have him on and just like you. know i was just grateful that he gave me. that time this guy's about to. this man's in abu dhabi you man. this man's in the desert baby he's out. there about to sand wrestling that sand.

casa. he's about to castle roll you feel me. um and i just you know he's got to get. counter to the ground i think but well. you know and i want to sit there and. sell it but i don't know. i don't know some bit some bad [ __ ]. over there the uh. nashville mma put me into a damn figure. nine last week. so what you know i can't even answer the.

phone in one of my one of my hands is. all. stagnant because of whatever she did to. me damn hexed me. so i you know i'm all i can do is just. we cheer. and but win or lose the man's a champion. and i was just honored to be in his. presence. that's honestly how i feel. what's going on um what was i thinking. about. oh we have the show and it is.

friday night january 15th 8 p.m. you know i i'm so i'm just excited to be. able to do this with chelsea. and uh and we're just gonna try to make. it fun and to try something new. you know i realize um. i realize that sometimes i you know i. get it's hard to try something. new sometimes as life gets going oh well. i know what it's gonna be like well uh.

you know what if people don't like me. after it what if. you know what if um it's not what i'm. used to. um and i have some thoughts like that. but i'm just trying to lean into it. and i'm trying to embrace it. you know just grab the mole by the damn. mole skin. and just shake that and yeah.

but yeah we have sketches you can get a. ticket and a ticket means you just you. can watch it. it's a 10 ticket you can sit there eight. p.m central standard time january 15th. and watch it at home and it's going to. be live we are. going live um. we got trey lewis will be performing uh. larry fleet you heard him on here where. i find god he will be performing live. uh we have some sketches that are gonna. be live we have some sketches. uh that we've already put together we.

have a talent show. with some real illegitimate talents. and legitimate and illegitimate. i mean orphans of talents like i'm. talking talents that have never met. their parents. i'm talking to them kind of talented. redheaded talents and uh. it's just gonna be something so. um what else is going on man.

oh i had a damn dome my god i had a. donut. you know i had a oh man i had it done. you ever had a doughnut where you just. were your eat i mean the whole time i'm. eating it all i could hear my. head i could hear that song uh i bet. they can't i bet you can't do it like me. i bet you can't do it like me. oh i bet you can't do it like me.

i think it's like a rap song of you know. it's an urban real that buddhist checker. but you can do it like me you know i. mean this thing. man i put a. look and i cut this thing into quarters. because i knew out the gate this was a. bad [ __ ] this little donut. this little sugar cinderella this [ __ ]. about to [ __ ].

turn into a damn taste gasm at midnight. at the stroke of 12 in my mouth this. thing. i could i cut it into quarters. and that's how old i am if somebody asks. you how old you are you say well i'm at. the age where i. will cut a doughnut in the quarters. and that's a that's an interesting age. baby. that's an interesting age out there and. i cut this back i mean this [ __ ] was. from atlanta. you know what i'm saying this was about.

that life but you can't do it like me. this [ __ ] was about that life uh. you know i mean this [ __ ] had a couple. gunshots on her you know a couple. gun uh gun shots and her thigh she was. about that life. and i cut that thing into quarters and i. had it man it's from five daughters. bakery it was in uh. out here in the central east and it was. oh. oh my god. this thing made me wanna damn.

i had to check with the lord and make. sure we was good after that thing. because it was good man. but that show is friday uh it's gonna. have sketches live music. um a talent show you know it's just it's. a live show and that's what's. interesting about these days. that you can do a show and to put it. straight into people. you know i i i don't have to go to some. big fancy man up there. or some fancy woman wishing she was a.

man. at a company somewhere and and saying. hey hey hey. hey hey hey mr andy hey hey. mr yavil mr barbara. can i do the show no you can't. that's gone and now you can go direct. and so it's just going to be a nice time. if you can't be there for uh. 8 p.m on friday. central standard time you will be able. to get the show for a week or 10 days.

after you still be able to go online. and uh and watch it but i'm excited it's. going to be a new adventure i'm trying. something. new and we've been working really really. hard uh. to put on something good so i'm really. grateful to um. i'm just grateful to everybody that's. been helping me. support for the podcast is brought to. you by. manscaped and it look. you're if you're a man you better be. scaped out.

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you know i uh. i was singing when i was young they had. we used to go to this place bj's. and um some people think it means blow. jobs but we don't know what it meant. but they sold uh pizza. you know round italian. and we would go over there and mom would. take us over there.

and they had a lot of little teams in. there you know the bobcats a little. softball or something. or they have a little handicap little. you know uh. you know hot wheels little handicapped. uh. kickball team or something they'd be in. there them [ __ ] you know we come and. we. and we never played [ __ ] we'd just be in. there our family. and they had bad pizza over there in. covington louisiana they had bad pizza. then the middle was real wet.

and the middle was real wet. and on some things you want a wet middle. but uh pete's saying but uh pete's ain't. one of them. so we'd be in there and you know. we had our allowance and we'd earned it. mom usually kept more than. my we usually earned more than we got. my mom had this allowance system where.

you never got it all. and um and shout out to my voice uh. patrick out there and he uh he one time. won a family. football pool it was his whole family 40. 50 members. when we were in like third grade he won. it. and he won like twelve hundred dollars. this is a long time ago. and his mother convinced him to buy a. christmas village. and so he didn't know any better you.

know he's damn nine. and so he bought it he picked all the. team's stand for texas tech. old dominion he'd picked it all michigan. and by the by after he'd wanted them. twelve hundred dollars. which is like four thousand dollars. today and his mother. he said my mom want that money she said. well we should invest it. and she made him buy a damn christmas. village.

that you put out on the table. and if you think their relationship is. booming today then. you don't know big business. um but i remember we go over there bj's. pizza and that video games in there and. you had to get the manager sometimes the. pinball wouldn't work well. you had to get the manager over there. this fella to come and put the ball. if you know the ball would disappear and.

he this guy always had a couple extra on. him. and the guy honestly homosexual i'll be. honest bro. and i didn't know at the time i was like. oh he's just friendly he likes to touch. my neck and back a lot and he's you know. oh a lot older and. you know uh and he wears deodorant on. his arms. full arm but now i know what i'm saying. basically i'm a sex. or home they call them homeowners and i. don't but they do but i.

sometimes i do. and um we're talking about uh. i don't even know um. oh mom would take us over there and we'd. get us a little bit of allowance we'd. have our allowance and then mom they had. a little uh venomous. uh video gaming machine legalized video. gambling you know slots little.

and it was the one the early ones that. just had the cards it was just the. five cards you hold a couple and we'd be. dude i'd be damned ten years old. up against they had those you know those. double those western doors. and in there they had three little. setups. and somebody there's always somebody. been had pissed back behind a couple of. the machines or whatever but that was. nothing we didn't see it. but you knew it'd happen it was that. kind of place. and um and my mom would go in and we'd.

give her her. her our allowance and tell her what to. bet on pick three pick nine pick the. queen. and uh and we lost it all. we lost it all as a family though. and you know there's ways to the. there's a difference losing it all alone. and there's a difference losing it all. together.

it just it just uh it hits different. but but yeah that was bj's pizza man and. then we'd have a little mom we go. next door that had a place called. mackenzie's a bakery. famous bakery and they ended up having a. family ended up having a damn fire and. somebody burned to death with all the uh. best rest. recipes you know but that's that's. louisiana man. and um we go over there and get a little. sugar treat man. little confection or treat you know we'd.

each have a quarter and we could get you. a little something bro. you know get your little baby eclair. nighttime eclair they call them. full of chocolate on it i'll get you a. little one of those. so now every now and then we'd [ __ ] up. and get a meringue bro. oh nothing sadder than seeing some. healthy little kids some dirty little. hey little dirty hands. eating a damn [ __ ] little french. man look like a damn look like. napoleon's uh.

appendix these little things you know. just. piece of [ __ ] man but uh. what else dude what else is even going. on now we we. we've been working all day on the on the. show for friday so that's really the big. thing that's going on. um got some exciting guests. so that's good uh. yeah that's it you guys sent in some. calls. um i'm feeling happy to be alive i want.

to share that you know i think sometimes. i don't share. that i am excited to be living in god's. world bro. i'm excited to be living in whoever. created this. i'm happy to be in here right now and um. i gotta remember to say that on the days. when i'm feeling it because. i don't always feel it as you well know. and so i have to remember to share that.

out loud. so i hope you're doing well um. and yeah and i really do i hope you're. just. rolling with the punches there's a lot. going on right. now out there. but when i make my world small. and connect with the people that i care. about there's. nothing too different going on.

you know if anything in some ways these. times have been have helped me to make. my life kind of smaller. um and so i have two options then. i can enjoy that or i cannot enjoy that. and for today i'm trying to enjoy that. and i feel like i. am so that's good man amen bro.

praise god bam ptl baby. all right let's take a couple couple. calls you guys couple calls have hit the. hotline 985-664-9503. as always is the hotline here on the. 371st. episode of this past weekend man that's. crazy. um that's really crazy oh i want to tell. i want to uh. if there's a memory you know and my. family would go to bj's pizza over there.

and years later i would work there my. brother would work there. you know we got him but there was a. class action suit there was a fire we. were. we went through all of that i you know i. saw some good. i you know i saw some. you know i saw some things i shouldn't. have seen over there i saw some things i. should have seen. you know i ended up getting i got a job. there years later i got fired. you know i've told the story i was me. and the other uh dishwasher had a.

contest who could hold our head under. the dishwater. the longest you know basic. you know mono imano type deal. and i was down there i'm on down there. 40 seconds 42. 43 and the seconds get hot bro. when you ride in dish water brother [ __ ]. get i mean it's not only you can feel. the grease building on your shirt but. you feel the ability you're almost a. champion. you know this little [ __ ] ass jason. only has about 39 seconds so i'm riding.

dirty now. so i keep going at 43 seconds i rip my. head up out of the water and i yell. straight up. champion and the boss had come in at the. time wild wayne they called him. and i'll say this every wayne somehow. gets called wild wayne which is [ __ ]. they need to definitely see how much of. these wanes. is wild because many are not.

and this man was not wild. you know he banged kind of a thick gal. and he uh. and he smoked an rip also but um. i can't remember oh but i yelled. champion the bosses right there fired me. on the spot. but anyway what was your favorite place. to eat growing up if you had a favorite. meal time you went. you know uh before that when my father.

still lived with us we went to pizza hut. and it was a it was a damn four star. four and a quarter. four and a quarters ours it was a four. and a quarter star establishment when i. was young. and if you go sit in there the thick red. plastic cups. with the crushed ice nobody was doing. crushed ice. nobody was doing crushed ice. and pizza did it man and people forget. that [ __ ].

a lot of people nowadays they see p you. know they just think it's baskin robbins. freaking little pervy uncle bro. but they was more than that. and we would go and have the salad bar. that pudding on a salad bar. do people would pay for the salad bar. just. fun of pudding. that's my sebastian maniscalco people. would pay for. a salad bar.

yes. i love you sebastian man um. but yeah what was a restaurant that you. hit that you loved give me a tell me a. little bit about it. maybe you and your father would hit.

hardee's in the morning. maybe i'll hit a tim horton. maybe you guys would hit a kfc in. shanghai because everything over there. is a real. [ __ ] but uh. but what would you hit tell me let me in. on it 985-664-9503. um you know there was a death at the. comedy store this week uh.

a man died. a man died and a man died. you know a man died and. and he died. he died and the man named jeff. and jeff was a pianist at the comedy. store and he was probably. i mean he was human furniture really he. was a.

he was like a water fountain of that. place. and i meant that because he would really. he would he kind of spit a lot when he. talked but also because he was a fixture. you know he was he was just a beloved. man he was the pianist. and when you brought up on stage when he. broke when you came up on stage he would. play you up. and you know as comedians we're so much. in our head we're in our own ego a lot. of times so once they call your name.

it's just. you feel your body walking up there and. then you feel your body grabbing the mic. i would always say you guys give it up. for jeff over here. you know he's blind i would say. and um and he wasn't blind you know. but he would pretend he was blind you. know he would just kind of blind out. and uh and he did it every time every. time i got on stage there it was just. this little moment that he and i had.

and um and i know that sounds crazy but. it was just this thing that was. a constant and we would have some nice. chats you know he would always tell me. nice things you know hey man this thing. this bit you're doing is really. it's good yeah you're doing a good job. just keep doing what you're doing. nobody's doing. what you're doing and he made me feel.

hopeful. you know he gave me a lot of hope. and he also gave me he gave me a rape. whistle also. but um. but yeah he died you know he died. and uh. and he died and he died and um.

he died like three four days ago. and it really breaks my heart man. because part of me wonders. did he die from. just the separation you know i think he. was 60 or 70 years old he might have. been 75 years. old and part of me wonders how much of a. man how much can a man's.

you know with no connection. like how many more people are we losing. from code because of. disconnection. and i don't know if we'll know the. repercussions of some of that. you know especially a lot of people that. struggle with addiction and struggle. with. um those sorts of you know in all types. of addiction you know it's like. when we isolate it can be really not.

good. and so i wonder how many. how many people just stuck in their own. little worlds without some reflection in. the universe to let them know that. they're good or they're okay. you know as much as jeff played us on. his keys and brought us up there every. night. uh we everybody looked over at him and. smiled. everybody acknowledged him he'd go blow.

a joint you know. he was gassed up so on that dude he. missed half of his work. you'd get off stage and and be ready to. bring up the next person he went even. there. he literally had to work like 12. one minute spots throughout the night. and he would probably make about eight. of them. um. but it was just he came there and he. just everybody loved him he was this.

weird. like you know sometimes he throw one of. those little rubber balls and it just. goes it just goes. and it's bouncing off thin this and it's. bouncing. and he was like that he just touched. everybody. um. and and he had crazy stories man he he. he got aids bro he got aids and he.

you know and i would even joke from. stage you know jeff right here y'all. give it up for jeffy's terminally ill. you know and uh. and he got a's man and i think that's. brave as hell people say you know. you know say this and that about aids. but i think that's that's brave as hell. man and um. he has a great episode with brian. scalaro that is out and he had recorded. it five days before his death and. you can go listen to that we'll put the.

link as that as that as well. in in below. and man he you know. and he just he used to tell me about. being young and being in a place called. provincetown and it was. real gay you know real like kind of gay. hit men. dude come up and just stab you six or. seven times with that peter bro. with that wayner that kind of place you. know. you trying to buy a soda and they give. you half a cup of cop.

you know when he said he got taken. advantage some and. and then he ended up out in los angeles. and uh. and he thought his life was going to end. but his life really began when he got. out there. and i didn't really know that i would. care as much. not to say that meaningless you just. don't know when some people leave the. earth how much it's going to hit you and. it just you know it didn't.

it just made me realize how different. things are going to be and how much. a lot of people might be struggling. um. [Music]. you know and i didn't i didn't ever know. you know he really i mean i just for him. just wake up and be positive every day. and having gay aids man.

and to just be to show up every day. you know and uh. and that's you know. and that's really the that blood ghost. baby aids. and um. yeah i just want to say thank you jeff.

man you know we love. you bro. and you were nice and you were warm and. you were kind and. [Music]. you didn't ever be wild or try to [ __ ]. or do anything wild like that you just. you know you gave homestead to people. that needed it. um. and i i felt like you would have shared. with anybody you would have shared your. time. and i wish i had spent more time with.

you brother. you know i wish i got to know you a. little bit better man uh. you know and we love you jeff jeff scott. i want to let you know that. oh man um yeah sorry i didn't mean to. get off like that but. uh you know life is just this.

it's like. life is just like this. life's like this it's like a like an. outfit or a costume or a coat.

and the second i start to kind of feel. like i know what it feels like. it it turns into like a. just a different. and i can never. i can never wear it right i can never. know how i look in it i can never.

i can never know if it fits really it's. just brief. moments of know of of life feeling. tailored. um before it completely readjust man. and god bless you jeff scott man and uh. yeah we love you bro. you know i don't know if you know and i. don't know what you were going through. when you were at home and you were by. you know. for you know what was going on you know.

and i'm sorry that uh you and i weren't. closer. but i just didn't realize how big of a. part you were in my life and of a lot of. other people's lives man. and i'm happy that i got to um cross. paths with you. on this realm brother gang. um i want to let you know if you've ever. had acne baby. adult acne or whatever middle age acne. that um. and you're looking to get clear skin. that you can do it now. become a proactive subscriber.

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skin you want somebody taking care of. you. look we all have stresses in life. from little to big stresses i had so. much acne when i was young. i was afraid to smile at people. because my skin would tighten it would. pop a zit. that crazy afraid to raise my eyebrows. because it would pop a zit them all and. i'm afraid the. white you know the white in my skin is. gonna you know a chunk of white will. shoot off at abroad. or a teacher or somebody acne is.

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let's take a call uh. hey theo how you doing this is ali out. in dubai uh hope you're doing. what's up ally in dubai my brother and. i'm. i'm envious of you and take care of uh. michael chandler and dustin poirier when. they're over there. and take care of dan hooker and conor. mcgregor. and take care of all them boys and over. there knuckle tussling man gang praise.

god brother onward. well i wanted to get your thoughts on. hamster healthcare. uh you're the resident hamster expert as. we all know. and i wanted to give you a quick uh call. to. get your thoughts about how we should be. treating hamsters when they're sick. so amen brother and um. this ought to be interesting let's go. brother onward long story short. my wife bought my kids a couple of dwarf. hamsters about a year ago. so okay yeah and that's roborovskies man.

dwarf dwarf hamsters are roborovskies. and they're small and they're real cute. they look uh. almost like somebody just you know. tickled a uh. marshmallow and put eyes in it onward. they're like hamsters but. smaller uh hence the name dwarf and. one of them got sick a couple weeks ago. a few weeks ago. his eyes swelled up and my kids thought. he was blind in one eye and i said okay. just give him a patch. uh give him a little cane he'll be okay.

uh. or send them outside and let the. neighborhood cats have their way and let. nature take its course. but my wife thought no we gotta take him. to the vet so. we got into a little bit and then she. took him to the vet the vet hit us with. some. uh dwarf hamster health care which cost. me about a hundred dollars. yeah well look and ollie and i and i. love it and. uh and i'm glad y'all out there loving. animals and loving the essays baby them. small animals. you know when they had a guy used to.

live by me his boy named chucky and he. used to. you know he'd smoke cigarettes and. you know used to [ __ ] supposed to be. putting the shopping carts away at dell. champs and he damn lied. and he was doing drugs but um. uh what i'm telling you look. a hamster is not a vettable animal. you know a hamster that's a damn look. it's not i mean it's. i mean it's that's a you know a ham.

a hamster is not a vettable animal. brother it's a that's a to-go lunch for. a wolf. you know i really think you should just. let the lord work on him there brother. uh he took his blood pressure he checked. his heart rate this kind of stuff. a little bit strange to me any case they. also hit him with some antibiotics so we. were giving him antibiotics for a couple. weeks. and then uh he died he had they didn't. work. and so now we buried them in the. backyard.

god is the number one veterinarian. okay god is the number one veterinarian. especially. for a hamster okay your hamster got to. cataract. that means it's looking for the lord. baby. your pony needs a hip replacement that. don't mean. spend 20 dollars to get little daisy a. new piss hinge. okay let the lord work that means the. lord got his. tool belt on and he ready to go.

your frog has a lisp that'll mean it. needs a. speech therapy it needs a grave. a grave is the lord's lost and found let. the lord. collect them and refurb them you feel me. your hyena needs a chin bone well let. the lord. your kitten got a cleft palate well. let the lord your guinea pig.

got a arthritis well ltl baby. let the lord y'all out here. tinkering with the man's work somebody. out in beverly hills got a. pet mosquito in a back brace [ __ ]. let the lord you trying to teach his. turtle spanish. [Applause]. y'all need to quit acting like god don't. do the work. and el hey.

okay that's what i'm telling you right. there baby. and thank you for calling ali man you. got to be good over there brother gang. i got to tell you right now we'll get to. a few more calls then we have a guest. coming in. athletic greens the reason i take it is. because i don't like eating celery all. day. i don't like eating vegetables all day. i like to get me some and get me some. and go i like to give me a little agua.

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theo and get your free year supply of. vitamin d. and five free travel packs today. look i've got my mother on athletic. greens that's how much i trust. is your mother on it let's go. um let's take another call right here. we'll take one more and then we will get. to our guest. today hey theo my name is aaron. hightower. and hey aaron and thank you for calling.

i like aaron man it's a name a mixed. name. could be p male or female pet anything. bro. mystery ghost even gang brother praise. god. i've been a video game programmer for a. couple of years worked with a lot of. folks. and i wanted to get your take on what's. called the simulation. hypothesis i think there was a. story that went around december 30th or. so. i hit fox news and it's been doing the.

circuits i haven't seen. everywhere it's been but yeah. there's a guy michio kaku k-a-k-u. and he's got some comments on it but. yeah i wanted to get your take i thought. you would. give us an entertaining insight from. your perspective what it might all be. about. thanks for everything you're doing theo. huge fan take care. thank you very much aaron assimilation. hypothesis. by kakach all right this says. do we live in assimilation gauging.

whether or not we dwell inside someone. else's computer may come down to. advanced ai research. or measurements at the frontiers of. cosmology. i have to pee okay i'm back um. you know do we live in assimilation do. we live in a computer. man it really a lot of it really starts. to. feel like it you know and i think for me.

some of it is because of how much time i. spend on a computer. or next to electronics. you know it's gonna feel like it. it's gonna feel. i'm gonna feel like i'm locked into a. database of course i'm gonna feel like. i'm. probably being controlled by one i'm a. computer sends me an email it tells me. that email usually a lot of times tell. me what i need to do next where am i.

going. i put it into a calendar so i go check. on a calendar. and the calendar tells me okay this we. have to be tomorrow two. three seven pm hear who hears who else. is coming. so it starts to be really that i'm. following. and storing things that are important to. me in an electronic world. so much so that.

that i could easily see why if enough. people suggested. that we were living in assimilation. it wouldn't be hard for me to maybe feel. that way. that somebody was you know nintendo. switching me. especially a lot of people switching sex. as they get older.

like somebody just you know. you know did l2 smash the right. uh l2 and then smash the r and then damn. you know larry's got a cop now. you know or bridgette wants some tits. now. and that's that could be something. that's happening. um. do i feel like it.

i think if i start to give into that. idea. then that's not going to be good for me. i wonder how i would feel say if i cut. off all electronics for myself for six. months would i still feel like i'm in. assimilation. or would i just start to notice that a. lot of people are addicted to. electronics and electronica and digi and. digitalia.

um. is also i don't understand sometimes if. we are say we're an assimilation. sometimes you know i remember sometimes. i would just leave the game on. i'd be playing playstation playstation. or something i would just leave the game. on i would go. that's what i worry about sometimes that. somebody started assimilation and then. maybe they got attacked or maybe they.

went outside to get something and. somebody cut them. you know you know or really disembowel. them. and they're never coming back to the. machine. so it's kind of like in like war of uh. what is that thing called sim not. sims but um. bat it's like a battle thing where you. have crops and you know.

hey donny get the wood you know hey. cheryl huh. won't you farm farm. so let you know it has that whole thing. going on and i wonder if sometimes that. is just. on that screen where they went outside. to get the mail somebody popped them off. and now they're never coming back to the. controls again so now we're just stuck. here on this one page where nothing ever. kind of happens.

and we're starting to lose our minds a. little. but also i think we're just one little. ice age. or not even an ice age just like a real. you know kind of a it's gonna be chilly. out there today. age and. away from us having to get back to. ourselves and what.

and what it feels like to just be. to connect with a different source we. spent so much time connecting to this. to this source that of course we've. start to feel like part of it. you know if i have seven pickles i'm. gonna feel like a list like you know. i'm gonna feel a little green baby you. feel me. and i'm gonna start believing in green. [ __ ].

so i think that's where i am with it i. never felt that the rest of my life so. it's interesting that suddenly now. within the past five years when we're. getting so. i mean my device is always with me it's. never more than 10 minutes before i. respond to a text usually unless i don't. want to. so or let's have to think about it. and that's scared that's crazy. so for me that evidence seems more.

realistic. you know and i worry about the long-term. effects of us not having an imagination. anymore. and things like that. but i think if i start if now do i. believe that one day we won't turn you. know get into a.i where we just lay on a. floor with our mouths open. and somebody you know we go clock in at. work and we're just laying there all day. watching our avatar work.

and that becomes another world yeah i. could see that happening. i could see a huge transition of wealth. in that way too because. then you only can earn money in the. avatar world. you know in this brainscape. so suddenly all the money whatever you. have on the outside doesn't matter. anymore. you know i think it is interesting. everything you know i don't know if it. always happens but it'd be interesting. if a great equalizer comes across.

and it sets it all at zero again. and then you find out what's in you. oh am i doing am i just gonna cry am i. just gonna. am i just gonna think am i just gonna. judge am i just gonna blame. or am i is some little part of me that. still has a pilot light of damn. manhood and bravado and womanhood gonna. [ __ ]. flicker.

and pick up a [ __ ] hard stick. and say let's go i don't know you know i. don't know. i do not. know riley mao is here. riley mao how you doing brother good. all right man um you know it's been a. while and people been asking about you.

and uh i just wanted to know. what um the last we heard from you. you had a love in your life and you had. come across some love. and do you remember that i do okay good. and um and tell me about that the girl. madison was her name. and you guys uh and it kind of fizzled. quickly i remember is that something i'm. recollecting well or no. you're right yeah okay and uh take me. through a little bit of that you guys. had. how many dates did you go on uh just one.

okay okay and it uh and then after that. what happened uh things just didn't work. out. between us so we just we just uh she. went back to. a different state and we just never saw. each other again. and when you say that things didn't work. out what does it mean because you really. felt. i felt like you were into this gal i was. indeed. um but you know hey things happen.

like what i mean. i mean i don't want to get into too much. detail obviously um. but i mean it just i mean she basically. just. saw another guy she was interested in. another guy really. and did you ever meet this guy no no. he's he's in a. in the her state as well so. oh it's easy yeah so she's taking the. easy way out kind of. hitting on some a local guy yep. yeah i hate when chicks do that oh he's.

in he lives in my state i'm gonna i'm. gonna hook up with him you know. um what um. what how what else been going on how and. has how has love treated you since then. has there been. anything new on the love horizon not yet. but. um but i you will be the first to know. what what when something happens oh okay. nothing has happened no not yet. okay and how uh how were your holidays. did you enjoy it did you do something. what did you guys do.

you go to hawaii no my parents did. they're they're there right now. oh wow yeah they they left me there and. they actually left me in california. um went to hawaii and um. now i'm here and do you guys celebrate. christmas yes. that's awesome man good i'm glad you got. to adapt man. um what else man what else can uh. what else do we need to know i know it's. been a while and i'm glad that you're. here now and i'm glad to be able to. check in with you.

um do you do you. have you been alive what have you been. what is going on. have i been alive yeah yeah i've been. alive. okay and what else man give me a little. bit more than that give me. have you been outdoors you've been. indoors um i've kind of been staying a. little endorsed just. because of uh covid okay um and is that. fear hitting your community a lot are a. lot of people going down. no everyone's like just saying screw it. let's go outside. do vietnamese people get covered a lot.

or no. i have no idea. okay keeping it close to the vest. um riley mao you'll be uh you're. you'll be in uh the um christmas town. extravaganza. i will be exciting. exciting i'm excited to see that man and. i'm grateful that um. that you pop back in and i'm grateful. that you know hopefully we'll hear from. hear more from you what kind of ladies.

if there's a lady out there. that really fancies a man like yourself. you know a small. you know not small but a still-growing. maturing uh. malleable you know uh eastern kind of. you know western kind of eastern man. what what type of woman do you think. does would deserve a man like you or is. a good woman. um i'm not i'm not a guy. to be too picky um.

i mean just someone that you know treats. a guy right. simple as that do you feel like there's. did madison leave you feeling like there. aren't good women out there or did you. did it leave you hopeful or hope less. did you feel like. it it made me hopeful definitely really. that's awesome man and what um. what do you uh do you envision like uh. any future moves or women because that. was your first kiss right. right and do you envision like i'm sure. you started to fantasize oh this is.

gonna go to another place like i've done. this with women you know it's like you. get the kiss and you think you're gonna. get. you know a double up you know and things. are going to go crazy and you get all. these crazy you know ideas and you get. sensuality creeps into your body. and next thing you know you're just. disgusted with yourself or touching. yourself. but do you uh how did you get. like how did you stop the fantasies and. stuff how did you get away from that. um i mean honestly i just. said or i just thought in my head you.

know hey she wasn't the one. move on there's plenty of people out. there. there you go there's plenty of koi in. the pond right there. maybe we'll find you a love out there. riley you never know true. never know what happens and do you have. any other uh. any other words of wisdom. no. riley mao ladies and gentlemen man thank.

you thank you so much for being here and. we hope you'll come back soon we'll see. you at the um. belated christmas talent extravaganza on. january 15th. 8 p.m central standard time um. i don't even know let me think uh if. there was. a song oh i know what this. is i wanted to play this on the way out. um you guys thank you for supporting uh. this past weekend thank you for. supporting our sponsors.

um you know we got some new get that. hitter merch that's out there. and uh a lot of stuff. but we don't have to get all to it all. today uh take care of yourselves. stay confident go saints go bills. and i'll see you guys on friday nights.

[Music]. celebrate living. celebrate misery. you hold that soon we're gonna die. let's have some fun while we all die. celebrate dark days. celebrate all y'all bang.

this is spencer jacob growl. [Music]. with never home. let's have some fun while we all died. [Music].

you guys be good to yourselves man you. guys deserve it love you see you next. time.