Red Rover | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #352

what shirt do you wear brother small. yeah and how does that feel on you does. it feel. tight feels good what a little tight but. good. amen brother all right today's episode. is brought to you by. grey block pizza gray block pizza 1811. pico boulevard. on the way to the beach grey block get. that hitter baby. you know i really i live between them i.

live kind of between uh. i live in a lot i kind of go with a. large shirt and. sometimes i want to be in an xl. you know i want to just be in an xl i. want people to see me and be like oh. yeah he wears an xl. you know i want the ladies to see me and. say oh yeah that's an xl fella that's a. real. you know that's a stallion or something. because i feel sometimes like a little.

you know. i mean i was so excited when i got from. a medium to an l i was. i remember i bought myself a damn can of. beer when i. when i did it you know when i got from. that medium to that l i remember getting. myself a damn cold kind of beer and. god i just felt like i had made it. you know and and some people you know. your size you run out of size you know.

god only gives you so much size and you. run out of. you know you know he doesn't give you. enough yarn to keep sewing yourself. bigger and bigger. and so you run out and you kind of uh. you know you're stuck with the quilt. that you are and. and you're always i feel like as a man. you're always kind of hoping to get to. those other levels you know the. to the s to the m to the l to that xl. and the double xl that's true that's. really.

that feels like tricky territory. to me riley what do you think about that. yeah i think you're totally right. and did you ever go from an xs to an s. i have and what was that like for you. ah it was a change yeah did you feel. do you remember when it was i think it. was around sixth grade. six seventh god it's beautiful man.

and what happened your bones grew out or. something they did. and did you remember people noticing did. you notice did you feel any different. yeah i i felt a lot different i felt a. lot better. and do you think will you ever get to an. m do you think you're headed there you. feel it coming on. so sometimes i wear m's um oh really i. do depends what type. of shirt okay so big dog. getting out and about huh yeah seems so. things things are changing for you bucko.

i love that i love hearing that i love. hearing people get. to new levels all right let's see what. we can do here. welcome to this past weekend. a long time ago. i was in love with the girl. and i think i took that love a little. too far.

[Music]. you can see the cigarette buttons on the. wall come on. and all the empty bottles in the hall. [Music]. if the water gets too rough you know who. to call. you baby. [Music]. and i can see the way it looks in your. eyes i can see it baby. i'm so so lost with his foolish life.

if you ever have to ask baby i'm. surprised. i'm so surprised. [Music].

[Music]. little black flies. and that is 89 volt and that's a new hit. they got there that new raw. that new soul ringer right there 89 volt. coming in hard. coming in hard like an erect garbage man. baby.

and doing what he do collecting things. baby that's it right there. man little black little. black flies that'll get you get. that that'll get it for you right there. and that's off that album i think little. black flies i believe is the name of. their album that's 89 volt. good to be here with you today um. you know i've been watching uh the. olympics i just went out of town.

you know i tend to travel and i remember. when i was young uh. the first place i ever went a friend of. mine a neighbor. and this fella was haunted man. this fella was haunted brother and his. uh little gerald was this boy. and he was he had a deficiency or. something when he would. say something he would say it again. under his breath real quick you know. um he would be like yeah i'm going uh.

i'm going to get me a lime soda i'm. going to get me a lime soda. he would say things twice and people. thought that he was. twins that had never separated. you know people said oh he got another. one in there and. god never divvied him up at birth and. so he's doubled up in there and other. people said it's just an echo you know. he gots a big. he gets a wide throat so when he says.

something one time then you just hear it. another time hear it another. time so there's all these different. rumors and speculations you know. but i i you know when i see gerald he he. would just say you know he would say. something to you and then he would say. something. he'd be like man i got to go home it's. lunch time i got to go home. you know he just had that double up on. him he had that reverb that heavy. he had that heavy uh ver that audio. bounce inside of him.

you know just just double dribbling all. of his syllables and consonants and. every word. you know god was just double dribbling. on it. and the first time i ever went anywhere. i remember his his mom was. uh and mama was fat. and i hate to say it like that and she. was. she wasn't like she didn't have like a. beer belly and look. we all come in different sizes. and i think there's advantages and.

disadvantages to all of them. and his mama was just warm like a damn i. mean she just. i think she worked at a hospital or at a. either that or she just wore she might. have just worn men's clothing i don't. know what she did she just. she always had matching pant suit top. and bottom. so she could have been a nurse or she. could have been a damn. you know she kind of dressed like a. black guy you know matching pants and.

shirt. you know what i'm talking about riley i. do. and anyway she was so warm she was a big. lady she kind of. you know and i i i shouldn't have said. she's fat i mean and i don't mean it. like that like. degrading or i just mean she's a you. know she was just she had extra. and that's the kind of woman she was she. had a little extra hug for you she had a. little extra. love she had an extra you know whisper. in your ear if you needed she had a. little extra sandwich.

if you needed a meat on a bread she had. it for you. i don't remember her name i don't. remember her name when she and she died. she did die. eventually i'm not sure what happened. but. she really uh she wore like a gold chain. as well she dressed honestly like a. brother. she dressed like you know kind of like a. crayola crayon with a gold chain on. you know a lot of time you'll see a. black gentleman have orange pants. orange shirt orange orange leggings.

orange. shirt orange sunglasses of a full. dichotomy of one color. you know um anyway they took me one time. to. i guess it was a campground i thought it. was in mississippi. mississippi america and if you haven't. been there. you're it's very much like uh. it's like reading tom sawyer but. with your time with your lot with your. body and. and your time it's like basically.

wandering around inside of tom sawyer. you know you see people that don't even. don't even believe don't even know about. certain things you tell people. you know about the 21st century i don't. even believe you. you know people too busy you know. drinking. sweet tea and just kind of. you know putting teeth under their. pillow hoping for the best kind of vibe. but anyway so we went there and that was. the first place i'd ever traveled to the. first my first experience getting out.

and they took me over there to. mississippi and. and uh we went swimming in some type of. hell i don't know what it was it could. have been that they i think it was some. type of a river or something. and uh and they had a snake in there and. i was so scared. and and we stayed in these trailer homes. and we ate bologna sandwiches. and if you haven't had bologna i mean. it's like uh it's like a damn.

have you had it riley now bologna meat i. have and what was your experience with. it like how would you describe it. um it's more like a type of ham. i would say okay. you look that up for us tell us a little. bit more about it if you can. and i remember we had it and we had just. american cheese on these buns and. some type of condiment on there could. have been mayonnaise could have been. white.

mustard i think they came out briefly. with a white mustard that never took. off because i think people were. squirting it on each other and saying it. was. you know ejac or semen or whatever you. know all kids will be. but uh anyway what do you got riley any. intel on it. yeah it's a meat batter so beef pork. turkey chicken. or all of the above damn so that's a. damn charlotte's web gang bang right. there you know what i'm saying baby. that's everything i mean if you. i mean that's really just like taking a.

damn farm and putting it in a blender. and then pouring it right into your body. or into your buddy's body. but anyway that was the first time that. ever traveled and that's where i went. and. since then i've continued to travel i've. been a traveling man and. you know this past weekend i went up to. um. [Music]. minogue mynonk. minnesota can you look at it for me. minok. ming naan i think ming naan like.

for like filet mignon mingnon minnesota. what does it say. there's a top 10 best filet mignon in. minnesota. all righty man but this place was called. i think um. i think mignon minnesota i'm not sure it. could have been called mignon but. i went up there and man i went up there. jimmy john invited me. and you guys know jimmy john the. sandwich monarch he's that turkey tom.

kingpin. you know that's who he is and he invited. me up there and he does a summer camp. with. all of his friends he invites all type. of friends and humans. and um. and we and and i got to go and man flew. up there on a private plane. fancy plane beautiful i mean god even. the air smelled like. you you'd inhale and just you knew a. couple stock tips. you know you just i mean damn you clear.

your throat and find. some cryptocurrency in it you know just. living high on the hog. baby like somebody put a ladder on a. damn pig's back. and i went up that man i was living high. on the hog. so we took that did the jimmy john jet. up there. oh sorry man i got got a little bit of. bitcoin i think they're still stuck in. my throat from the experience. um but we went up there and it was. awesome he literally.

he literally treats his friends to a. summer camp in the summer. and it's adults and children and. childish adults and adulterous kids. you know autism and everything man. there's people up there and. uh you know the of. travis tritt came and played the. american country music icon who. really has a voice like somebody stuffed. three black dudes right into his.

esophagus. you know and one black woman i mean he. gots all the. you know he he hits the notes baby. um a band called jj gray. uh who else zach brown band came up and. played and man. they got so many hits dude you could. have a concussion. just from listening to them but it was. awesome they had sea dues and jet skis i. went. fishing caught a uh sturgeon or a little.

baby sturgeon or something. caught me a little carp a little bit of. lake carp. or sunfish or brim or uh. sockalay speckle tr there's so many. names for this one. fish that comes out of a lake that it's. just. you know it's one little fish and. there's so many names for it you know. white fish soccer perch brim. sunfish um. uh you know white koi.

uh and white koi was also. also the name of every wigger dude in in. any community any kind of white dude. that wanted to be black wig uh. they would his name was coy usually and. he wore north carolina jersey baby. praise god no. but what are we talking about man i went. fishing we went see uh. c doing jet skiing watched fireworks. had a nice little cabin they had some. brand new cabins they had a gym.

man it was it just made me. one of the things that was cool it was. like if you have some extra currency. one great way to spend it is doing. something fun with your friends. instead of saving that money just saving. it all or. for what you know. so anyway it was i got to i met clint. boyer.

and he is a um he drove nascar. you know who that is riley mao i don't. you watch a lot of nascar. or not they allow that in your you. guys's deal. uh a little bit yeah. i guess it's all bumper to bumper in and. y'all's culture huh. it is have you um what was your first. car raleigh. it was a honda accord oh yeah i had one. they're good huh yeah they're reliable. they are reliable god.

my first car was a ford escort i don't. know if they still have they might have. discontinued them because of. fire hazards and a couple other small. issues they had but. uh they um. one of them you could put a motorcycle. tire on the. on it if you ran out of regular tires or. the ability to get to a tire. to tire up.

so you could do that baby and then i. remember we could you know sometimes. we wouldn't be able to sleep anywhere we. we so we popped a couple of uh. we chiseled a couple holes into the. back of the hatch back and put some uh. plastic tubing out of them and you could. just you know you have to kind of keep. your mouth on the tube but you could. sleep in the back then and just breathe. out. through in and out of the outside. interesting so pretty cool. stuff but anyway i had a great time went. up there caught some fish. caught some uh just caught some joy.

i mean just staying up laughing i mean. they had some. rednecks up there and white necks and. black necks and. uh they had one dude had no neck on him. you know a necklace dude just straight. up shoulders to brain you know. just dude i mean he just wore his. thoughts on his sleeve you know that. kind of felon. um and if you're watching on youtube we. got a lot of i'll put a lot of. you know edits in of uh we'll put some. photos in different times from the.

weekend. um but i got to go on this little can-am. car. it's like this uh can you pull up a. picture of that do you mind really. can-am. c-a-n-a-m. this it's like a four-wheeler. looks like a big cricket kind of but. with wheels instead of legs. and it's a fierce deal and i got to go. racing on that with clint boyer's. and if you for not familiar with clint.

boyer's he's a. and i wasn't either i never met the man. or. knew about him i believed he could exist. but i never knew actually i'd heard his. name but i'd never met him. so i didn't know he existed i just heard. his name. and he took me out on that you see it i. do. interesting how would you describe it i. think it's an atv. atv there you go or it used to be atv i. don't know what it is now i mean they. remodeled it i mean it's a vehicle now.

right but at one time yeah i guess it. could have been a damn tv but. i mean this [ __ ] had all the bells and. whistles you know and. and we got out there and we went on. these off-road trails and when you're. riding with a real man who is a nascar. man. you know a guy who i mean this dude. probably he'll drink gas and then just. regurgitate it into his tank if he needs. to get that extra lap. you know what i'm saying he will uh. siphon out of his own body for that. extra. you know that last leader um.

yeah it was just a whirlwind so. but it's just it was cool man it was. cool and. uh kid rock was up there the freaking. the methadone mascot of america. basically. and he's up there and he got a beautiful. brother that only got. one leg beautiful fella named billy. one-legged guy. and beautiful and i swear to god if i. had a brother if i had as much money as. kid rock does and i had a brother with. one leg.

i'll tell you this i'd get him another. leg but. that ain't how uh. that ain't no k rock spends his cash i. guess he does things different so praise. god baby. um what else is going on uh. but yeah i was just thankful man i you. know it's just interesting you meet you. meet a guy jimmy john through the. podcast and then. he invites you on a fun weekend and just. reminds you. it was just a nice to be around people.

you know i'm not around people very much. you know i'm. my job is very solitude very solitudish. you know it's solamente that's spanish. for. just me and so to get to be around. people and laugh. and you know some kid try to buy drugs. off me and. and you know just that's you know that's. america baby. you know that's america man.

and the best part was i said to the kid. i said look man i can't sell drugs to. you. you know if you're not you know if. you're in my family and you're a child. i'll consider it more but. you know this is a child that's not in. my family and. and he said well look man they're not. for me they're i'm gonna i'm gonna. resell them. and and that's america man. that's america baby you gotta respect. that. but that was a beautiful time maybe a. little bit of prime rib.

it's a couple hot cake in the morning. and it was good man he was smooth got me. a little smooching on. you know touching face with some other. with some feminine deal you know a. little baby out there little baby dragon. sucking face with a little bit with a. little baby dragon. out there raleigh mal how's the update. with you with the ladies. uh not going that well damn.

yeah well we got a lot of calls that. have come in today about. you know last episode you weren't here. we talked about the first time i. that i'd ever ejaculated out of my body. you know. and just lost that tug of war with the. devil you know and uh. so we got a lot of beautiful young men. or i don't know if they're beautiful but. i assume that they are on the inside. who have called in who will be sharing. some of their stories.

and uh so we'll get into that you. remember your first time bucko. uh no no never happened really you've. never masturbated. no oh my gosh brother. wow man what is that called is that what. do you guys call that. nothing really there's got to be a. special nickname i think in. gay culture if it's a man in gay culture.

a guy that's never kissed a woman is. called a golden oreo. i wonder what that is my god brother. damn you just have just baby's breath. inside of your. nuts right now that is damn beautiful. brother congratulations man. thank you you think you'll be able to. hold the line are you trying to hold the. line until marriage you think or just. until a relationship. yeah until marriage wow.

good for you brother and do you feel. like you have more of an inner strength. going on. i do yeah. you know i had breakfast with a guy a. couple weeks ago and he'd never. masturbated and i. i was just so jealous. because the rest are because i. masturbated honestly less than. probably 11 hours ago or 12 hours ago. i couldn't get to sleep and i just felt. the devil just climbing up and down my. penis and i just had to do something.

when you get that feeling what do you do. just chill out put your hands on ice or. what. um i don't really get the feeling damn. now what if you get erection in your. body what do you do. can't say i get that either what really. oh my god. oh and do you think you have you might. have an iron deficiency or something or. do you think it's just. no i think i just contain it damn.

you like damn chun li bruh. god god. dude how far can you jump i bet you. could jump down 11 feet huh. i wish i bet if you tried hard you could. man. unbelievable the unjackable riley mao. ladies and gentlemen. thank you for being here today brother.

thanks for having me i didn't know that. man. i did not know i was sitting here. with just a man that was riding that. paste baby all the way to the finish. line. because yeah i struggle with it man i. just. i do good and then i just struggle you. know. but i hate just jerking out i hate it. but what do you say to people out there. who are considering it or on the fence.

about masturbation. um i mean i would say do as you please. but. i wouldn't recommend it i'm one of those. few guys that wouldn't recommend it wow. and do you know other people who are. like you just like a damn human. christmas carol. i do you do wow. and do you all meet up somewhere or. something do you are you guys in a group. chat. um not really group chat but you guys. know who each other are. right damn.

you know i've always it's like a super. power. it is a super everybody wants to be iron. man. you know but iron man. you know he ain't nutting out at night. he ain't and they're making macadamians. in his bedroom. you know so there is a lot of power and. cheering up. cheese up hoes down baby you know what. i'm saying. i do you do dang so do you ever think.

about the long. road you have to hoe before you're gonna. get to some uh. you know some you know skeet that's what. they call it in the urban community. yeah it comes across my mind a few times. damn. i almost want to be there when it. happens brother no homo you know. i'll invite you well come on now that. might be a bit. you know but maybe i'll be outside if. there's a window or something i want to. be right up front.

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don't forget to use our url to let them. know we sent you. loan amounts will be determined based on. your credit income and certain other. information. provided in your loan application go to. upstart.com. t-h-e-o. yeah you've been watching the olympics. rally. uh just a little bit okay and you have a. favorite sport what are you guys. in your culture is there a favorite. sport over there. i like hockey oh really.

what is it about it uh i don't know it's. just more engaging. and fun in my opinion yeah. so and it's this is summer olympics so. they don't have it right right. so you're just watching and looking for. but they don't have it i've done that. yeah i've done that before someone will. watch basketball and just wish it was. football the whole time. but i'll keep watching um. a couple of news stories out of the. olympics a belarusian sprinter.

christina simeone. simanuskaya was granted a polish. humanitarian. visa while seeking political asylum. after she refused to board a flight. back to her home country from the tokyo. games this is pretty wild man her home. country. wanted her to wanted to pull her out of. the olympic games. and so she asked for help on instagram. uh and here she is right here here's her.

statement. and she asked the olympic internation. the international olympic committee to. get involved and help her out. you know her own country didn't like. some of the ways she was representing. them. and they they said this is a no-go. we're gonna pull you out of here and uh. and she didn't want that so she asked. for help while she was away from belarus.

she asked for help. and so now poland came along polish. power. and they're letting her drop over there. into warsaw. and you know this is the type of thing. this to me. is an act of. like speaking out against types of. oppression. you know this to me is you know you have. a. we've had a different american um.

olympians you know they have some new. lady the other day. she got it looks like a piece of king. cake her hair is kind of died up and. she you know just talking about. oppression from the metal stand i don't. even think she won first place either i. think she was silver. first of all i think you should be you. should have to get first place to. to talk about the oppression and also if. you're in america. there's no there's not oppression. i don't feel like there's oppression you.

know i've met people from every race and. every. gender and even animals look at air bud. dude in some countries you know no. offense for you know riley mal but in. some countries dude that. you know you go to some of these more. like kennel snacking continents and. things would be different that thing's a. movie star over here. you know so when a lot of these people. are just talking about oppression. but they're literally standing in a.

place where they're able to say whatever. they want. and can still go back to their own. country. i think it's a perfect example of uh. seeing her. this is a real example of what like. oppression. and control uh by our country really. looks like. what do you think riley on any of this. have you seen any of this you don't know. about it. i haven't okay. um but yeah i think i'm just over the.

you know the look at me when you're. living in an amazing life it's really. hard. to uh to say that the. place you're living it in the platform. you're living it in is oppressing you. i mean i think we all feel somewhat. pressured. and struggle through society. but there needs to be struggle. for everyone there needs to be some.

pressure. [Music]. but yeah uh this is this is. something that is real when now you. can't even go back home. because you spoke freely i bet if that. was the case. for some of the american athletes uh i. bet that they. would have a different a understanding. of oppression and then be a different. tone. i think but what do i know you know what.

i'm saying i'm just one human. who's ejaculated less than 11 hours ago. so and not really proud of it. you know um. what else man what else is going on uh. lobuci. he's been on the pod you know that and. he had a he had a little. speech he gave about homosexuality being. pushed. he said how y'all trying to force this.

this gay stuff on the world bro. it's sad how y'all trying to ban artists. y'all sad bro it's sad bro. you know in 10 years it ain't gonna be. normal for a kid to be straight. you know it's sad bro y'all trying to. force it on. on on these kids bro you know. you pushing it on the artist push it on. all the biggest artists you know why.

because the kids love those artists. you're attacking these kids the kids. love these artists. so we're gonna make all of them promote. this [ __ ] we're gonna make all them. promoted. and who gonna follow the kids. it's sad bro. it's sad bro little boosie speaking out. of one thing i love about laboose he's. always a. he's always willing to share what his. real thoughts are. you know and it's something i i struggle. to do man i think a lot of us struggle.

to do that in today's. society with a for a fear of retaliation. you know and most of my fear of. retaliation. you know comes sometimes from. uh you know just that i won't be able to. have opportunities on certain platforms. i'll be de-platformed it's pretty. it's pretty scary you know that. here we are you know.

america like uh how it even got started. people wanted to think their own way. and think something that was against the. norm and say stuff that was against. the norm so they left. in a boat but now there's no new place. to go to. um. there's no you can't just get in a boat. and go to a new america.

canada's not even letting people in. right now they're still dealing with the. first covet or whatever i don't know. what they're doing. you know and i wish somebody would go. help them out because they're you know i. get so many dms from people in canada. like jesus christ. come help us out you know they found. five. people with covid in a snow bank. somewhere. up near you know up in saskatchewan. and so now the rest of us can't go see. our grandparents for another year. but lobuci look man they definitely.

it feels like there is a lot of times an. agenda. this bigger picture agenda. you know like being straight is. definitely. feels like it's. like it is frowned upon. or it is it's not right. um i i agree in all. in some of the sense that a lot of times.

they want to create a lot of uncertainty. and kids. and that's who who who consumes a lot of. stuff and who really believes a lot of. things that they see through media. you know you got eight-year-old children. now saying that they're. they may be gay or or they are gay and. you're like well. you might be but i wouldn't it might be. a little early to call the horse race. and it's wild man the media is wild on. all fronts.

you know i think anyway the media has. just gotten out of control. i think the media has created a lot of. problems with the covid thing a lot of. you know nobody knows if they can trust. a news source anymore. and i believe it's just because you. can't. the news wins if we're all fighting if. we're all sitting there in. fear of covid watching the news to get. the next dose of whatever they want to. say then that's how they win.

especially now when there's like. different news channels and. some of them don't even feel a merit. like it feels like. some of them just i don't know like they. just look so down upon america where. it which is the country you're allowed. to even have the freedom of speech in it. it's all kind of baffling to me am i am. i losing you here riley no. i'm here what do you think on some of. this do you think sometimes the media. kind of. or that like a lot of stuff is.

anti-straight or do you think there's. any of that going on what do you what. what are you guys hearing on your end of. it of the horn. honestly i don't really listen to the. news that much anymore just because a. lot of it's fake. yeah and i don't either i think i just. get fearful when i see people who do. sometimes you know that's almost real. scary to me is meeting somebody who. believes the news but then also. if you don't have the news all you have.

is that inner news your instincts. and and they're not really letting. people live by those anymore. it feels like it's getting real dicey. out there but i applaud a little boosie. for speaking his mind. you know a lot of a lot of media a lot. of television and. movies these days mostly movies have. gotten really bad because everything's. so woke. it's the most it's just like every. character is.

gay or trans or has you know they have a. ghost now they have two gay ghosts i saw. the other day somewhere. doing something they're not scaring. people because it's wrong it's like. you're a [ __ ]. ghost you're a ghost. your job is to do scaring. okay i don't need a ghost. two ghosts you know to. open up a you know a cat rescue.

you know what i'm saying that's not your. job is to be ghosting. so it's just getting different out there. it's getting a little dicey out there. uh let's get to a little more news and. then we'll get to uh. get to what else is going on the wuhan. lab you know that's coming out that they. say that they've. you know a uh a. federal committee has determined that. there's a lot of evidence that.

believes the mainstream media was silent. on alarming findings from the house. foreign affairs committee. uh a probe into the possible ordinances. of covet 19 on monday. despite one lawmaker calling it the. greatest cover-up in human history. look a lot of people have thought that. that's where the disease came from. so i don't think i think this is just an. example of. the news puts out what it wants to put. out.

and so they're now shaping what you. believe which you know. and that's what's scary. that's what's scary is that the media. can shape what we. what we know. and what we believe they always have i. feel like there used to be a sense that. you could trust. them but now there's not that sense so. of course you're gonna have every. you're gonna have people believing. things you're gonna have people. uncertain what to believe. you can have people trust in their.

instincts. that's kind of where i'm at man. that's kind of where i'm at one other. thing i noticed the if you look at the. olympic medals. the three leading countries are uh. china america and russia. which i think is just kind of. fascinating because those kind are kind. of like the countries that have. that keep getting like spit around as. um like at each other's throats kind of.

or influencing each other's policies or. having an effect on each other's. policies or. tariffing each other or boycotting each. other um. so i just it's almost like. it's just it makes it's like if there's. some sort of bigger power. some new world order that's moving. things around. then it makes sense that now in the. olympics. these are the three countries that are.

uh. the metal leaders that are kind of. against each other it's almost like. it's just building the plot more and. more. you know just the accusation of russia. infecting american politics and. uh the issues with the the virus coming. from china. and the denial of it uh by. by um some american media and american. politics. it's just interesting that these are the. three that are in the olympics and it's.

neck and neck and. i don't know you know get a glock and a. little bit of property i think if you. can. i feel like because it seems like it's. spooky sometimes. like you don't know when they're gonna. turn this this switch up even higher. and the grill under all of our feet is. gonna get a little bit. gonna get a little bit wicked. but maybe that's all crazy what do you. think riley mao do you think i'm making. any sense or nothing. yeah no you make perfect sense dang.

and now this is coming from an oracle. this is coming from the beautiful little. filipino oracle right here. the undaunted the un br. the unbustable riley mao will call you. man. we gotta find you a decent girlfriend. don't we yeah we do. now can you date legally and everything. yeah yeah. we'll have to see if we can find a. decent lady for you what's your. instagram handle riley. it is at rileymouthfilms at riley mao.

films so ladies if you're a decent lady. who is willing to you know. be that bust hunter that filipino bust. hunter then you can go after this young. fella right there and. and i don't you feel like i'm auctioning. you off i don't want to be doing that no. please do. okay there you go and there you go. speaking is real mine. the lobusi of our uh studio right here. actually you know what real quick we got. a video of somebody losing it in a.

waffle house let's see that. hey get over this counter you're going. to jail. and this is a couple of cute white girls.

actually enjoying. some what looks to be let me rewind that. i think that was. uh potato. potato. and while a couple of aggressive you're. not enough aggressive but a couple of. urban women. and one of the women wearing complete. lime outfit. lime coloring so that is kind of a thing. in the urban community you'll see a lot.

of full. color lime while. these people enjoy a bit of potato here. a couple dimes here patotting up. while uh a couple. other people not handling society very. well at that moment. and there you go and somebody just. trying to work and. somebody to know how to be a societal.

person right there and that's. it's always tough you ever been in a. place where they had a fight in the. establishment riley. actually yeah just recently where were. you at. um i was at one of the bars in downtown. nashville oh wow so you go out to the. bars though i do. okay and what type of places do you. enjoy when you go out do you enjoy a bit. of music do you enjoy a bit of just uh. people sitting around telling tales or. what um yeah either like you know live. shows that. artists in nashville go to and perform. or. like edm raves oh okay damn.

now that feels like it'd be risking that. you know risking that body nut taking. your body an. unexploded body out to an edm ray. because there's a lot of sexy outfits. out there. uh not for me damn what do you just. drink cold water the other time. do you hold ice in your hands what do. you do um. sometimes water but beer as well oh. really you'll have some beer. dang and that's really man that's right. that's getting on the bull said how do.

you have beer and not. masturbate your body off um i just drink. beer to have a good time. damn god i need god. i need god man. [Music]. oh i just can't stay off that bus stick. recently but uh. anyway speaking of that man we had. i'm gonna let you know uh i gotta i. actually have some show a show in. nashville tomorrow.

no thursday night i'm gonna be running. my. uh the hour um. it's gonna be over there at zany's there. may still be tickets available actually. i don't even know if there will be when. this goes up but. just letting you know and then other. places i'm coming to soon huntsville. st louis cincinnati wilkes-barre. minneapolis charleston richmond. baltimore portland burlington. albany buffalo columbus we will be. putting some florida.

on the schedule in this for the spring. that'll go up probably in about a month. i think. as well i want to get there to canada if. you guys ever open your country up. so i'll be looking forward to getting up. there and seeing you guys um. what else oh before we get to a lot of. men called in about that first bus they. had. laurel hubbard an openly trans. female weight lifter failed to complete. any of her three lifts at the women's. 87 kilogram olympic weightlifting.

competition. she's become the first out trans woman. to compete at the olympics. hubbard met all the requirements set by. the iwf but her participation came with. controversy yup. what i think it should i would love to. see and this is just. an idealistic thing. an idea i'll call it. i wish that it was a trade program. you get one we get one we'll send you.

ronnie. you send us no. we don't want elizabeth okay we want. diana. you know you send us jacob we'll take. rhondisha like i feel like that. it would be better if there was a. kind of a commission where you got the. trade. where you got the trade and you had to. go all the way through.

and live like say if the man that's. coming over he was a postman. and now he wants to work if he switches. at the same time as somebody else to a. different gender that red rover. then they got to be in that person's job. so if you come over. you got to do whatever that you know. that lady was doing. if she's an esthetician now ronnie. is doing nails and feet. you know and sin yum is doing.

selling cutco knives or whatever ronnie. was doing i just think i would love to. see. you know red rover red rover send. sharif right over and we will give you. melissa jane. i would love to see that a little bit. more so that you could keep tabs on what. how it's fully working out then you get. the full transition. can you go all the way over can you then.

now your uncle is a woman. but can she do the uncle roll does that. make sense riley. it does do you have any trans in your. family. i don't at least. not that i know of right and it's a lot. of hide and go seek out there. you know i thought i've seen somebody. with kind of a long posse before and i. didn't know what it was. but.

you know you know you know. you're in your 20s and you just hope god. has a bigger plan for you but. anyway man um yeah that's what's going. on out there. i do feel like the wim. the feminine gender is benefiting more. from this because men we're sending over. some decent men. we've sent over uh. the olympian the decathlete kardashian.

uh i don't know what that man's name is. you know his name. i don't we sent that man so you got him. now he's woman out you got him. but who are we getting you know i'd love. us if they would send us somebody. you know send us uh. um oh that lady that played in friday. night lights you know her name. i don't jesus christ man.

not you jesus a different guy but. uh never mind i wish that they would. send her over. okay we did it we said a lot um. let's get into these calls man a couple. of calls uh that came in. people that this is we had men calling. and hit the hotline 985-664-9503. talking about the first time they ever. just really jacked out of their body. i want to tell you right now that dinner. time can be. chaotic that's right but with freshly.

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for free that's six months for the price. of. three just go to babb el.com and use. promo code theo for an extra three. months free. that's b a b b e l dot com slash theo. it's good to learn new languages huh. yeah. do you find yourself learning more as. you get older or did you feel like you. did a lot of your learning as a youth. um hey i'm learning every day. amen amen man.

i want to thank our callers that called. in and offered up some of their stories. let's get into a couple of them. right now these are men in their first. experiences with that first. bust and rather this will all be kind of. new to you but this will be a little bit. of learning experience for you. so listen up yo what up theo this is. your boy beasley god bless man. i'm down here in fayetteville arkansas. beasley. welcome to the show beasley and thank. you for calling from over there in.

fayetteville i've been there that's. where bill clinton and his wife started. doing that deal. and uh and it's a beautiful college town. onward about first time we uh. we let that love potion flow well i grew. up in spring i. saw my buddy his name was chris he's a. bird watcher. uh i bet he is dude i bet he is if this. is a. if he's in this story onward uh but. anyway they had an in-ground pool across.

the street. so i was probably like sixth or seventh. grade and. i was by the uh by the side of the pool. and that jet. was sitting that winky and uh you know. i didn't even really know what was going. on and so. finally you know. i just did that thing and i didn't even. know what it was. and so uh every day. every day after that i want to go and. swim you know with the.

across the street at the neighbor's pool. and. i would just sit there and sit there and. sit there. and finally the mother caught on to what. was going on. and uh i never they never let me back. over there. again and i mean she didn't tell anybody. else what was going on but she. definitely knew what was going on. so that was the first time that that. ever happened. so that's just my story. all right man love you guys gang gang. buzz buzz.

gang gang baby love you too man and i. want to say this i would love it beasley. if maybe we could even get that woman's. number and see if you could give her a. call and just clear the air. you know uh i feel like sometimes there. needs to be some air cleared. i got a a man saw me masturbating myself. in a little pool house. in atlanta one time when i was young and. i'll never forget that man and really.

what his face looked like. real quickly as he opened the door and. saw me and then closed it back up. that still hurts my heart a little bit. if i'd love to see him if i could. you know if i had time to search you. know show people a picture of this man. until we found him but. but yeah if you can get that lady's. number man we'd love to get her and you. on the line together and see if you. can't. just bring all that to a close brother. you know because i'm sure part of you. still feels bad. you know masturbating into a into their. pool. and and then not even.

and then never seeing each other again. that's. that's dicey dude that's almost deadbeat. dad kind of [ __ ] so. let's hear more brother here's another. one that came in thank you beasley. what do you think about what beasley had. to say there riley yeah i mean. i think he feels a little bad. i can just hear it in his voice yep. thank you i can too actually. i like that about you man you're alert. you're right on the cusp baby.

hey theo uh you know i just i just. wanted to share with you a story about. the first time. that i ever you know experimented with. uh. you know getting that old semen out of. me ejaculation brother. yes sir tell me more you know what i do. agree with you that should be on the. periodic table of elements. and uh well i was home alone and i was. exploring. you know it was around christmas time i. was looking in the closet. um in my parents closet looking for some.

you know christmas presents maybe some. wrapping paper just to get a clue and uh. see this little bottle and it said. something about. hot and cold on it and i squeezed some. in my hand and it smelled good and it. was slippery. and i said you know what i'm gonna go. out in the driveway and sit in that old. saturn that's been sitting there for. about. you know three years so started uh. started rubbing on myself and uh you. know something came out of me. and you know i was probably about 13.

years old and uh. you know it felt good i did feel ashamed. though because i knew i wasn't supposed. to be doing. that but i didn't know that was gonna. happen you know it just felt good so i. did. and you know uh i got that hitter. as you told me to i got that hitter gang. baby yeah. the fella right there found a little. special lotion in his folks room and. he's out there pleasuring himself in a. saturn doing hell. doing hand pleasure in a saturn and i'm. sure a lot of people have combed out in.

a saturn before i'm not shocked by that. because they even had a discontinuum at. some point. so. what about school dances and stuff riley. when you went to that sort of thing was. there any pressure to be sexually. active or creative in those environments. um not really then again i only went to. a couple of school dances. was it any with like an actual. girlfriend it was more like a setup date. neither it was just with friends oh. really just with the amigos stag huh. man we got to get you out there.

all right let's hear another one that. came in right here thank you guys for. these calls and for sharing this part of. your life you know i know it's a unique. time in a man's life. you know when you really when you just. start making those orphans let's hear it. hey theo it's rigged man i'm calling uh. listening. to your latest episode and you're. talking about uh wanting stories. about the first time you spilled the. dumplings. amen rich thank you for calling ridge.

amen uh. my first time diddling lord's middle man. and it was in the bathtub. and i was laying in there i'd take long. baths i was about 12 years old and. oh yeah as a pervert baby onward my. little sister. you know we only had two kids in our. house so it was none of that but. she had some barbies and uh. she had the barbies laying out and they. had the smooth pelvis region but. you know my imagination got the best of. me i spilled the dumplings.

and uh and then from there on out it was. every night. i was thinking about the neighbors black. sisters and i felt guilty about that but. i've gotten past it and uh but yeah it. was the barbies in the bathtub man. all right gang gang gang baby yeah i. mean look. that's one thing too it can promote. diversity one thing that's neat about. jerk and all for jerking yourself. or spilling your body outside of. yourself is that uh.

is that you can fantasize about anyone. and so it can create a lot of uh. diversity in your brain. you know you can really i mean you could. really. pleasure yourself to someone from the. 1800s 1600s. you know you could pleasure yourself to. someone from. damn you know 1960s whatever you want. they could be black they could be viet. chinese white. asian german you know.

they could be anything bro so there you. go. all right let's hear one or two more. that came in onward. ceo the first time i uh this is david. from baltimore calling it first time i. pleasured myself. i uh i actually didn't do it with my. hands this is a little weird. but there was a hole in the back of this. teddy bear. sure there just happened to be one huh. that old trick that i had that i when i.

was a kid there was a. like a hole in the back of it and i kind. of you know. pressed inside it and kept going and. then. when suddenly i got to the point that i. ejaculated. i um i definitely was scared i didn't. know i grew up in a very christian. family no one ever. you know explained to me what semen was. really and so. i really was scared that maybe i had. hurt myself because it was the first. fluid to come out of my body besides. your inner feces or blood.

that just really kind of caught me off. guard yeah baby that trick. shot you know that fourth fluid maybe. more. and i definitely uh was nervous. yeah i love you man love you too brother. and yeah. oh what do you think when you hear these. guys rather do you think it's okay do. you think they're wrong or do you feel. like it's just what they're doing what. do you what's going on. um i mean like i said it's. it's what they do if they want to do it.

they want to do it yep. can't stop them yep wish we could. sometimes let's hear one more that came. in here here we go. hey theo it's uh xander from indiana. zander thank you for calling and xander. definitely sounds like somebody that's. willing to. jack themselves out a little you know. get all the. jacked up let's hear more bubby just. giving you a call listen to the podcast. you said you want to hear about that. first time ejac story. anyway uh i was in the eighth grade so.

it must have been about 12. 13. oh yeah and i went on a ski trip for. the class trip and i went off a big jump. and i. landed on my back and i messed it up but. uh. when i got home my mom was telling me to. ice it what not. and she brought out this uh back. massager. you know i was in my bedroom with that. back massager and uh. you know i put it on my penis and a few. seconds later you know i. i creamed out brother did that admission.

anyway i didn't know what happened so i. went to my older brother who was about. two years older than me and i showed him. and i was like dude what is this. this came out of me oh he looked at me. go throw those in the garbage and don't. ever tell anyone. that you did that again so i was scared. i was like man. what was that anyway i spent the next. couple months. scared to death to lose any and i. thought that uh if i. if i did it too much that i would run. out and uh i didn't figure out that your.

body just keeps pumping that [ __ ] out. until i was about. 16 17. so i'm that uh. that private school late learner bro. anyway have a blessed rest of your week. gang gang baby. gang baby huh that he would run out. that's interesting huh. that he would run out that he'd that. there wouldn't be more his brother said. don't tell anybody. go hide it the other kid's making love.

to a bear i mean. this is why we are the society we are i. think this is why. we don't know no one knows it there's no. education people are. making love to hold out bears um. people are screwing pool jets uh. you know it there's just. for all the information we have the fact. that we don't. share it to one another blows.

my damn nuts out. oh well that's some of them right there. man i remember. i'll share a few with you riley a couple. of my own experiences. you know i remember i was in love with. this gal and. she was pretty good-looking you know she. was probably six out of ten which was. good for me. you know it was good for me she was a. real little thicky bear. and she had real soft titty i remember.

that. and i was over at their house one time. and we were sitting back by this. river they had like a river out back or. like a creek or something. and she uh jailed me out into this. stream you know she gave me a handy. or whatever they call it you know just a. wrist just wristing me out into this. little stream and i didn't know i'd. never. like. i'd never just you know pervade semen.

out of my body near a uh. anybody else no one had ever else had. seen me do this kind of magic this body. magic. and so next thing you know i e-jacked. out into the stream. and uh these fish swim up. and literally just start consuming it. and so i'm like having dreams. that i'm gonna have like fish that look. like me.

in our area you know so i was always. embarrassed to go fishing after that. because i think i always felt like. somehow they would know. like somebody would pull a fish out of. the water and they would hear it you. know like. then the idea would come into their head. because the i the the truth would be in. the fish. so [ __ ] like that will really can really. mess a child up dude. you know it can really. it can really mess a child up but. riley what else man anything else we.

want to tell people or talk about. i got a free hot dog from daddy's dogs. oh you did i did. oh wow and how they how how how'd you. get that uh. i was just walking around with a few. friends and uh. someone who was working on working out. the. cart was like riley mao and i was like. hey man what's up he was like dude love. you on the podcast. so he gave me free hot dogs really yeah. shout out to daddy's dogs.

damn daddy's dog's hooking people up. with uh. hooking riley up at that nice treat was. it a good dog it was. yeah i love a good dog man. i love them some places i can't eat them. some places i can't eat them. were you guys just walking down the. street yeah amen brother. yeah i love a good dog man. what do you put on yours um. anything onions mushrooms.

wash up mustard relish real quinoas yeah. anything damn yeah i like mine i think. i like first i get the dog and the bun. then i like to make a little space. between the dog and the bun. i like to put ketchup on one side. mustard on the other. then i'll go with a relish out that. packet doesn't taste great but. i like what it does.

and that's how i'll do mine you know and. i really like to have a diet coke with. if i can. i really like having that diet coke. feeling hit my face after i have the dog. after i have that dog hit my face i like. having that diet coke. you prefer a certain beverage with them. um. either lemonade or dr pepper oh lemonade. okay. i like that. hey pio it's uh cole of san diego man.

i've been uh. appreciating the kind of guests we have. on recently on this past weekend. especially the one with. mario gutierrez the jockey went down to. del mar racetrack today and actually got. to see him walk off the. track and call them by name and said i. appreciated the podcast. and i i really enjoyed hearing what he. had to say and. he actually said thank you and. recognized that i. shouted him out so i appreciate it man. it was it was a good podcast and.

i bet the money on him will won about 60. bucks so i appreciate it still keep. doing what you're doing i know we all. appreciate it man. gang baby thank you yeah if you haven't. seen that episode. uh it's the jockey episode one of the. job episodes and it's mario gutierrez. and man that was one of my favorite. conversations just. learning about everything about what. it's like to be a jockey. and learning about his trials and coming. from another country.

um into into this oppressed horrible. place of america. and being able to live out his dreams. you know i mean how does anybody even do. it. you know how does anybody even do it. um i just there but uh. but no it's a great story and he and. he's just uh. man you just you love him you know and. you love the way that he communicates. and then yeah it gives us somebody to. vent on next time you go to the horse. track. if you're over there santa needed a uh.

or i'm not sure some of the other ones. he's at. but yeah down towards san diego i'm. about to get out there and go see him. i'm gonna hit him up soon and get out. there and go see him. but that's the jockey episode mario. gutierrez. and check that one out and i want to. thank everybody just for supporting the. podcast man. and being a part of things here riley i. want to thank you. thank you for being on the uh a part of. the episode today and. and for sharing part of your life with. us and. yeah man it's interesting dude yeah.

thanks for having me on. you betcha all right this is a song. every night. by jameson flood. and this song is with us early in the. pod and it's with us here. today you guys be good to yourselves uh. you deserve it. [Music]. gang. [Music]. [Applause].