Fifty Cent Sniffs | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #224

yeah I'm on the way to work I stopped. okay and I get me a coffee one of them. cafe cups you know and I've been pining. for it all morning I mean I've been. pining like a damn forest you know and I. hadn't had any cafe all morning and then. I'm wish you know I know okay when I. head into the studio almost stop I'm. gonna get me that frothy Brown hitter.

that that you know that sipper full of. just brackish and I like that coffee. dirty bread you know I'm saying I like I. just a little bit like I just a scoop of. the dang like somebody just scooped some. some of the Mississippi River into a. cafe cup and presented it at me that's. how I like it I like my [ __ ] got a. little bit of sweat in it you know I. like that dirty cup you know I like that.

cup of coffee that it might test. positive for a little something bright. you know the kind of stuff if you if you. mailed a couple drops in the ancestries. internet thing or whatever they come. back at you like damn this [ __ ] you know. this shit's got tomato base in it this. stuff got a little bit of caffeine you. know this just 9% Savannah Herron.

African I like that coffee I like that. dirty cup but I'm at the place a park I. get out of my vehicle and write as open. the door actually I'm opening the door. and car hits my hits my door boom just. lit it up I mean I didn't know what it. was at first I thought it was like a dam. just like a rhinoceros bro it was loud. and I thought damn where dot Park you.

know in Jumanji because I thought oh. just a rhino just knows that door down. but I get out and it is a it's a Toyota. it's a Toyota Camry and a Toyota Camry. that's a popular car usually for a. stepmother a lot of strippers drive on -. you know you'll see a lot of dancers net. night time you know ladies who got those.

legs working at night they drive a Camry. sometimes and a lot of the logos have. been stolen off of the back of it and. anyway the guy hit me it was a childís. beautiful [ __ ] hit me dude I mean. this guy and when I saw him but first of. all he comes up give me a hug - arm hug. and I'll say this it did defuse the. situation because I was a little man I. just got a vehicle I've been in an uber.

for four months sitting in the just in. little I mean it sitting and usually. there's a couple little chips you know a. little sour cream and onion residue on. the backseat and I've been just sitting. in that in other people's cars for four. months and then finally I got this. vehicle and BAM his beautiful [ __ ]. runs up both arms those already sorry. that's what he said out of the gate he.

double-double so sorry me and it. softened my heart a little you know and. this guy we shop we swap names and he. was look I'm all about different. ethnicities and everything I'm all about. beige power but this guy was extremely. Chinese okay this guy was I don't even.

know and I look we've all got different. things about us you know I got them. dirty hips I got that des booty you know. if you see me getting onto a short. school bus from the rear. you wouldn't think anything of it and. that's how much DSi got in these sweet. cheeks back here but um but this man.

should not have been driving this man. this man was probably seven hundred. percent Chinese he's uh he did not his. eyes were not open and I don't mean that. he also could have been on you don't. want to him antihistamines he would have. tested positive I think for definitely. some heavy claritin because his eyes. were not open and he was and his car had. looked like it had hit maybe hundred. cars I mean everywhere there could be a.

little ding or a bumper thing there was. one and his rear view mirror that's what. caught my door and put like a dent in. like the edge of it and everything is. fine it's all good but man that thing it. just kind of rattled my day and here's. what I'm saying is not everybody should. be doing everything. this guy is should not be driving this.

guy's not driving this guy is basically. just bouncing around Los Angeles I mean. there's no way he could see stuff I. think he hugged me in hindsight because. he was just trying to get a notion of. where I was at physically so that way he. could direct his voice in my direction. enough of my ranting um I've got a big. announcement to make. and I thank you guys for being here with.

me today and let's start off just with. something to make me a little bit. comfortable you know. [Music]. I'm just fill it in my bones.

[Music]. little town for me to sell that parking. brake and let myself. [Music]. and tell you.

just yet and honesty I don't even know. honestly that man but that Chinese. gentleman might not even have had he.

might not even have had eyes I mean he. was he may have been the bravest blind. person in the world he may have just. been the damn American ninja site. warrior but uh anyway good to be here. with you today it is Monday August 29th. 2019 and we are burrowing into the. future at the same rate we always have.

been one second at a time what's going. on a thank you to everybody came out. this weekend Atlanta was so wild in. Atlanta Memphis Louisville and. Birmingham and we got to stop in and see. the King Elvis Presley the house he was. born in and Elvis was born I mean the. house is tiny.

I'm not joking if you really if I had if. I had been maybe smoked about half a. pack of Winston's and if you opened up. the back door and the front door out of. his house and I had a little bit of a. cold and I cleared my throat and you. gave me three steps of running momentum. I think I could spit from the through. the front door out the back door of.

Elvis Presley to the launch pad and. right when you go in the door there. there's an old lady sitting there and. she's rest and I think I thought she. might have been deceased but she woke up. and she's right there sitting by the bed. where Elvis was Cohn saved a baby. man I tell you almost want to get into. bed and just you know hope for a little. bit of that magic but it was a beautiful. little home you get to see his high. chair he sat in as a little fella and uh.

and we had a nice time and that was over. there in Tupelo Mississippi where we. stopped and saw the birthplace of Elvis. Elvis Presley we went to Sun Studios in. Memphis and um just saw where Johnny. Cash had recorded Carl pic Orton. Pinkerton Pinkerton one of them hot. Carla some people call him hot Karl. andand Elvis himself and it was a great. time and so I got an announcement to.

make. it's no no no no I mean I guess I don't. if it's an announcement I just so I just. want to tell you what happened so about. a month ago I got a message on social. media from an actor and this man named. Chris Pratt and he is an actor and he. does you know fancy roles and he also.

does comedy roles. he's a very you know he's distinguished. in his industry and from everything I'd. heard he had always heard only that he. was a kind man I got a very nice message. from him and it said you know hey man. I'm paraphrasing hey man I think you're. a funny guy I've been a fan for a while. I'm doing a project coming up and I. would like for you to be in it and you.

know me with Hollywood I have different. types of thoughts and and you know I've. passed up on some pilots and different. you know sitcom ideas and things that. people have tried to get me into. there's even an animated series coming. out on Netflix that I did that I got. offered a role in I just there's. different things that I just didn't. really tickle my fancy really or even.

even rub my fancy at all and um but this. kind of hit me a little bit different. and it was just a direct it was a direct. message from a man who's funny and who. who I've I've found for myself that I. admire even outside of their work and. even though I don't know him I just I. guess it doesn't make any sense then I. guess I just felt like I've always felt. like he was one of the good guys now.

next thing you know they had me come in. and meet with a producer and just go. over one of the roles and Jionni who. works here the beautiful little guy you. know that little Christmas ornament I. mean definitely the kind of guy you he. seemed he seemed like the kind of guy. that would hang out of the he just be. kind of laying around the soap dish in a.

male bathhouse you know Jionni well he. helped me go over the lines and work on. it and and when I met with one of the. producers and then they offered me the. opportunity to be in the film and so. that's what I'm gonna do I decided that. I'm gonna go do to go do the film you. know I spoke with a lot of other people. that have been in this situation or you.

know had this type of offer you know. Sebastian Maniscalco I spoke with him. about it. Coco Diaz we chatted Bryan Callen even. helped me work on the lines to go read. with the producer and and even Chris. D'Elia almost helped me work on the. lines but he had to go do something but. um but yeah so you know I guess I'm. nervous but I'm excited you know I'm.

definitely excited and it's like it's. gonna be a movie that people can see and. look I'm really you know I'm excited. about it. but with everything there is a cost and. one of the reasons you know that I'm. you know something that's hurting me. about it that's really getting me inside. of me right now is that I have to. reschedule some tour dates and and I'm. bummed about that you know I'm really. bummed about it.

so those dates that I'm gonna have to. reschedule and I'll talk more about it. after our Glasgow Dublin Oslo Stockholm. London Manchester Amsterdam Sayreville. Bethlehem PA Grand Rapids Detroit. Milwaukee and Madison and that's most of. the fall touring you know and it just.

it's it really you know I feel sad about. it I mean I'm bummed out you know I've. really been looking forward to doing the. European tour like and I guess I'm just. you know I you know I guess I don't I. don't want you to think that I don't. care you know I thought a lot about this.

you know it's been you know the past. month it's been kind of like in limbo. and I've thought a lot about it and and. and I think it also has been presented. to me at a time where where I needed. some break from what's been going on I.

haven't been feeling that good to be. honest with you you know I've been. feeling very a lot of stress and I've. been feeling like I've been able to. connect very much what myself I felt. like I haven't been able to connect. sometimes when I've been on some tour. dates and I think some of us just been. exhaustion in and just the fact that. this came about like that that uh mr.

Pratt reached out to me directly and I. didn't have to go through like a lot of. Hollywood hoopla you know I've just put. myself out there and I mean you honestly. man it felt like like I did it my way. and that you know and to get to then go. and be in like a movie where I mean it. sounds really interesting it's supposed. to be about like fighting for the future.

and and like kind of like this powerful. sort of I don't know what I can say. about it I don't even know what all the. rules are I don't even know if I'm. really supposed to be talking about it. but I just needed to tell you that that. those dates that are that you have. tickets for you can get a refund or they. will be to be decided they're gonna be. rescheduled soon I just don't know. exactly when yet but I'll be there as.

soon as I can I'll find some way to make. it up to the people who are who are. coming out and I don't know what that'll. be yet but I'll find a way and. yeah I don't know man I've honestly just. been scare I've been like I've been a. little stressed about just talking about. that you know because I love Tornai you. know worked so hard to build up people. to come out to see the shows and then.

and the now I'm canceling on you you. know we're not cancelling but now I'm. rescheduling on you and and I'm sorry. you know I really am sorry I don't want. you to feel like I'm trading like. Hollywood for you I don't feel that way. there's been a lot of things that would. have taken my time away from my tour. dates or from my podcast that I've said. no to but this just feels like it's. coming at a moment where I need honestly.

I need a little bit of a of a break I. have been feeling that good and. sometimes nobody wants to hear about it. when you have you know future tour dates. or this on the docket or this you know. people don't they don't want to hear. that and as an artist or as a. entertainer you get scared to say that. because you don't want people to not. come and support you you know you work. so hard to get people to come be part of. a group and and then now I'm you know.

you're letting them down but that's the. choice that I made and and I feel like. that's what you know I just need I just. think having a different experience you. know it's gonna be eight weeks at least. that we're gonna be shooting this thing. and and it's just gonna be crazy like I. can't even imagine what that's gonna be. like but I will make the show up to you.

I will be back to do the shows and um. and I hope you forgive me. you know I hope that you forgive me and. uh. in that and then you don't give up on me. yeah you know you know and I plan to. still bring the dark art store I don't. want to I still want people to see this. show you know this might be I think.

maybe my the best show I've ever put. together and so I still want people to. see that specifically and you know the. the place you reached out to for your. tickets they will be the place that will. reach out to you for reimbursement or to. reschedule they'll send you information. however they send it and if you have. other questions then you can email. producer at-at Theo von comm or you can.

hit the hotline and we'll do our best to. answer whatever we can as well but your. best bet is gonna be to go through the. ticket people so man I'm sorry. I feel really bad but but I feel I mean. I just I came to explain to you fully. how I've been feeling like it in the. past two weeks especially like I feel. like I've just been hit a little bit of. burnout and I haven't felt like myself.

even on the even on the podcast episodes. you know I've just felt disconnected I. noticed when my family was visiting that. I felt like I couldn't really relate. with them and I couldn't be the person. that I wanted to be you know I've missed. like being like a little bit more joyous. and stuff my brain feels like it's. always you know how when you're taking a. test sometimes and you have to like you.

know you know you know how normally you. go into class right if you were in high. school or few was in remedial you know. whatever or if you [ __ ] just were. born and then got a job when you were. about 18 whatever maybe you didn't do. school but remember school you would. kind of goof around it was relaxing you. could live your life and then on test. day. the thing I hated the most about test. day in school. you said you couldn't have a regular day. of class where you could have fun and.

enjoy each other's vibe and feel you. know shoot a thing at [ __ ] little. Rodney brah shoot a little Wang spit. ball dude hit him you know ball him once. ball him twice and then surprise him. with a little nail you know one of those. little long. one-inch little picture nails and just. hit that bastard boy he knows saying. teach him who his stepdad he is and I. missed that was fun the thing about but. on test day you're like damn man we got.

to be quiet. you know everybody leaves class right. when they're done with it it just was a. different vibe and that's what things. have felt like for me a little bit the. past few weeks is just like test day so. I think that this opportunity is coming. at at a um at a time when I'm looking. forward to just being able to have. recharge in some ways I really am. and also it's still something that. everybody will get to see you know so.

it's like you know I feel like there. will be a neat way to at least see that. I could do that I could be in a movie. screen and then I did it my way man that. we did it our way you know that we just. put ourselves out there and that we. didn't need a bunch of [ __ ] we. didn't need a bunch of you know like. fake PRBS and that I don't know and.

here's the crazy thing is man a couple. of weeks before uh mr. Christopher Pratt. before you sent me a message I had a. thought in my head that he might I was. like what if that man sent me a message. about doing up project with. and that's kind of crazy you know so. anyway I'm gonna quit talking about it. I'm really sorry you know it really. really breaks my heart that I'm not. gonna be able to come to some of these. shows right now I will come to them soon.

we will have the dates on the books ASAP. and and some people you know some people. said well look just wait till you know. what the dates are before you announce. that I said nos I want to know I want. people to know what's going on so I. still maybe embraer this weekend I will. definitely be in Biloxi. on the 31st but but those other dates. will be TBD and I'll let you know.

through social media or here on the. podcast or the place you bought them. from originally we'll send you a link or. code so that you have the first option. to get the new date oh let's go into. some some calls that came in on the. hotline as always the hotline is nine. eight five six six four nine five zero. three and if there's something that. you're struggling with or scared about. or something that's going on in your. life as a young man because we get left.

in the cold sometimes fellas we don't. you know a lot of times Society and. stuff just wants to look at young women. right now or animals I mean you see I. saw a video the other day 17 pets were. going to summer camp on a bus well what. the [ __ ] man if you're a pet dude every. day summer camp isn't it you get a treat. you get to you know you run around maybe. you go to a little park and you know.

bang another pet you never met her at. least get to smell somebody's mud loot. if fighting is something if any the. definition of summer camp boy we should. have this girl Tiffany bronzed she had. us I don't know how she got tits but she. got him you feel me boy. dude she had tits and this is before. people had tits and TIFF had them tits. okay and she I don't know how she got it.

into her head but she thought that. that young fellas men you know future. men boys growing boys what we'd love to. get a little whiff off them tease you. feel me. little frickin get a little just uh nose. Huff off them off them little nipple. Tatars boy you know what I'm saying. nem tits and so for 50 Cent's money.

going there smelling tits brush you let. you [ __ ] smelling [ __ ] and look I. was so keyed up at the time on tit that. I couldn't tell you what she looked like. I could I don't know if I ever saw her. face or shoulders or legs or arms or. even her lower torso man all I saw TIFF. was them tenth boy and it was 50 cents.

to to take a freaking big snout hey boy. get that snout hit off them just them. happy chest huh furs boy grown gang. and if sales were low boy for $0.25. she'd let you smell one bro but I always. saved up 50 cents and got that double. you feel but God dang it was a good time. and we're even talking about oh yeah.

pets are getting everything now man. let's take a hot let's take a call from. the hotline nine eight five six six four. nine five zero three. what's up Nasher over in West Virginia. WV in West Virginia I remember here and. uh I was there years ago and they had. some of the largest people and America. in the world I think even the world. largest body people you know obesity.

that was a sip of coffee let's go more. brother Nasir call you last night a. little reveal throw about six hours. Wow man thank you brother thank you so. much man I appreciate that all the way. out there and you thought I could get a. bit dated you a funny [ __ ]. really this was really impressed with. your energy man when you came out just. it's like you're all over the [ __ ]. stage didn't they just over but like you.

did a little bump or something out there. man. that's the Lord boy I put a couple grams. at a lord in me onward had a quick. question I went to the Early Show in. Louisville to be specific first comedy. show there have been two so I was kind. of curious to know how that show stacked. up against other shows if that makes any. sense like was that a good crowd bad. crowd what makes a good crab what makes. a bad crowd yeah I was just curious to. know everybody seems fairly well behaved.

sometimes already a little hell but him. look like a GE dude but yeah man just. curious to know what makes a good and. bad comedy crowd and how that night was. for you gang brother thank you for. coming through man and thanks for. driving that six hours while you know. what makes a good crowd for me it used. to just be that things were gonna be. fine and then at some points this year. it started to be like if you know I've.

talked about it on here a few times if. people got outrageous or real you know. people yelling in the audience too much. or somebody just drunk and cat calling. you know one guy threw up his underpants. on stage what oh boy dude if I'm chasing. something out of somebody's Underpants. brother it ain't gonna be no wiener. brother you feel me.

I'm chasing something else boy you know. I'm saying a little bit of cool time. when we so that dude that was wild but I. think just a crowd that's ready to enjoy. themselves. you know a crowd it's not like a. football game I mean dude I did a show. in you know when I take my Netflix. special the one that's not there now. there was some lady in Louisiana in New. Orleans yelling defense the whole game. you know people didn't what the [ __ ] was.

going on some people had never been to a. comedy show so this lady mad never even. been out the basement you know she may. have been locked up in the UM you know. she might have been off of that damn I. don't even know Elizabeth Smart dance. team or whatever she yeah you know I. this lady seemed like she'd never even. have to show she was facing the other. direction from the show and she was. yelling defense so but what makes a good. show for me is if people like I know. what I'm trying to do you know and I.

want the show to go good and I guess. it's just put their trust in me you know. that that I'm gonna that I'm gonna have. that the show is gonna be good but yeah. I think a little bit of engagement is. fine man you know it people having fun. but when people start to just make it. about themselves at a certain point. that's too much for me. dude Ari threw some guy out that [ __ ]. was hilarious yeah I was sitting in my.

backstage and his hair I turned they got. a little volume thing on the wall and I. cranked that thing up I said I'm about. to enjoy it here and all he was like. well I think you can leave then but you. know good for him. dude it's tossing somebody out of a. comedy show is a hard thing to learn to. do you know for years you just if. somebody starts yelling you just. sometimes let them go sometimes you lose. the audience um but I like the.

Louisville Lucy I mean just good people. man so many nice people came out and I. know I say that a lot about the shows. but that's who it is. you know that's who's a part of this. group and uh. and yeah I'm just it was a blast man we. had a great time we had a great time. what else makes a good show I think me. feeling okay. you know the second show in Louisville. man and the second show in Atlanta.

honestly man I didn't want to go back. out you know we did it and it was good. but you know that's why we didn't do any. meet and greets after those two shows I. just can't there's something uh my. stress level has just been through the. roof I think I've just done put too much. on my plate. and so I'm starting to scale back on. some things I'm gonna start doing some. less guest episodes because honestly I.

started to get worried about my own. health and well-being and certainly also. my mental health you know I've been you. know a couple weeks ago I was trying to. figure out what was going on with him. while I was feeling so exhausted I. thought maybe my medicine was wrong so I. tried to adjust my medicine and then. that kind of backfired because I started. just having like real scary thoughts and. stuff and and you know I think I've just.

been working so much that I haven't been. able to enjoy the fruits of my labor at. all and I also haven't been able to. focus on the things that make me want to. do this in the first place. you know like doing the single mom stuff. finding ways to focus on help another. young men who struggle you know it gets. to the point where you're doing two. episodes a week he throwing king of the.

sting and it's and look it's all good. it's all great problems to have but you. know you start to become part of a part. of a syst part of your own system even. if it's a system you start you you made. for yourself so I think just you. learning some time management for myself. will help me be able to get on stage and. give a fond show because the thing that. makes any show the best is when I'm. having a good time too. and that's what I want to Britt be able.

to bring to the shows no matter what and. that's another one of the reasons why. with this movie opportunity that came. along that I said yes to it. look financially isn't it's a big loss. for me financially to take this film and. to do this film opportunity I don't even. know how much I'll be in the deal. yeah look they may cut me and put me on. the floor that's the risk I have to take. but I do feel like a higher power and my.

life presented this opportunity to me at. a time when personally I had been. struggling and I used to feel more more. I used to be able to share my struggle. and stuff on the podcast and I just I. think it's been so hard for me to even. access my feelings I've just been so. busy you know and it's been hard to. access them in in all walks of life like.

when I meet people it's been hard like I. feel like people don't can't tell if I. care or not sometimes and I hate that. you know I used to know when I met. people and I was like trying to express. you know that I care that they knew and. recently I've been really I've just felt. I don't know if you ever put if you put. a little bit of electricity in an animal. you can still pet that animal but damn. it's that softness has a [ __ ] real.

bite to it you know and that's what I. feel like I feel like I've had a lot of. electricity in in my fur and uh and I've. been suffering also at a spiritual level. you know I've been suffering at a. spiritual level for myself. so when you know when the guardian of. the galaxy reached out and said just I.

mean through the ether and said hey look. I think you are a funny guy like what. you do and I've been a supporter for a. long time and I think there's a neat. opportunity for you it just seemed like. something that almost was like the. healthiest choice that I had to make for. myself so I know it's selfish but I.

think I just there's something that I. need right now to have a just I just. needed a little bit of regrouping and. and a little bit of recharging and so. you know it made me look at everything. that I'm doing and made me realize I'll. just have to make some adjustments. because I want to be able to do things. in my life for the long haul you know I. love going out on the stage man I'm glad. you had fun in Louisville and I'm glad.

that I surprised you. because I love to get out there and make. people laugh and when you see couples. sitting there and they're laughs and you. know you see somebody come up this guy. came up to me the other night he said. hey man I just got one year sober you. know him and you inspired me man and I. was looking at him and I felt like so. like hat like not happy but just felt. like I just felt so purposeful and I. couldn't even express that to him and I.

didn't need to it you know it's it. wasn't about me but I just wanted him to. let him know look man you know if. something makes you feel good man and. then man that makes me feel good you. know and uh and I just I've just had a. lot of electricity in my fur man it's. been hard for me to connect with others. so you know when I'm learning as I go. and I didn't want to like.

you know and maybe this will be a lesson. where I just I don't know I mean there's. a cost to everything you know when some. people may want to not come and see the. shows anymore some people may [ __ ] this. guy or you know I don't know but but I. feel like I'm I feel like I'm making a. good choice for myself for my emotional. well-being at this moment and then. secondarily I know that this will be a.

project that people will get to see you. know it's and it's going to be something. that's I mean it sounds crazy I don't. know what if I can talk about it or not. but I mean it's just going to be. seemingly bonkers and to think that that. that I would get to do this you know and. I'd have to be out there it's you know. like and it's not a money thing man did. I it's not it's not that at all but but.

I hope to be able to make it up to each. person that I'm going to that we'll have. to reschedule the shows I hope that you. know that and with all that said right. now let's go into this advertisement. Dollar Shave Club and I'll tell you this. man people have sold a lot of [ __ ]. but Dollar Shave Club when I first got. it I said huh huh and now dude I used it. today boy I'm freaking that the SC's got. me tight Dollar Shave Club I can't.

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another call here Austin and Logan Ted. Theodore Logan Alston and Logan calling. you from Colorado thank you for calling. boys out there in Colorado and you're. probably on them mom I'm guessing them. them little bears them gummy bears they. got that DSB or whatever homework from.

California Florida. and we will listen to your show to pass. the time the long hours on the road and. you have a lot of things going on and. your your shows but what are the ones. that we're really we're really noticing. is living and gratitude and we're just. super grateful to be able to share this. experience with each other and enjoy. across the country and see these amazing. places and all different types of people. and all walks of life and you're right.

there with us you know the whole way so. so we just want to say thanks and you're. making us realize you know you're. putting on the forefront of our heads to. live in gratitude to be grateful for. everything that we have and everything. we're able to do gang man I appreciate. that I appreciate that call um thank you. guys man I hope you're traveling safe. out there hope he's wearing your. seatbelts too because that'll get you a. lot of people think you could just not.

wear a seatbelt and you know have you at. 36 ounce : that'll stop you if you're in. an accident nah I'm brah. that way if that's the case but you just. gonna die and and you gonna smell like. dr. pepper dog you feel me. which actually ain't that bad dude if. somebody's at your wake or something. they walk by the coffin and they get. that hit and they're like damn what is. that boy Mountain don't bro wear your. seatbelt or but also also drink a drink.

you know. because I'll be damned if y'all if you. if you are at a funeral and you walk by. that dead body you get that hit of mr. Pibb bruh you know that'll make some. money just really grant a little you. know one thing that's funny man I've. been struggling with living and. gratitude man and man it's been paint. that's been really painful for me. [Music].

yes um it's one of the things I've. realized that that some just that work. was big too that I just had was doing. too much work man you know I felt. exhausted I felt like the things that I. was doing didn't even matter to me even. though they were exactly what I wanted. to be doing and it was just I was I. don't know man uh I was just uh and and. it was hard for me to be grateful for.

things and I quit doing some of my. gratitude lists in the morning and um. and so thank you man for reminding me. because this morning I woke up and did. it you know this morning I woke up and. did one and I woke up and did a. meditation and I woke up and did a. little bit of um you know just hitting. my knees and just the Serenity Prayer. you know because I've just been feeling. even though it's funny even though I've.

had more people in my life than ever. I've been feeling almost a little bit. more alone and so but I'm keen on. getting back into things man and thank. you guys for the call and I know. whatever I focus my energy on will grow. bigger in my life but that makes me feel. good that that was it that that that. that that that's been a theme in the. past man gratitude you know that makes. me feel like at one point I was really. really on a good path and I'm okay.

everything's fine I just I just got to. read I just got to calibrate a little so. but gang bro you got to be safe out. there dude and get them mr. pip bruh put. that belt on and get them mr. pip dog. you know think about others you don't. want somebody walking past your funeral. and all they get is a head of uh you. know Old Spice your honor ins so gang. brah let's take another call right here.

actually you know what let's hit this uh. this patreon right here thank you for. our patreon supporters. this patreon question comes in Jay. Tito Leibowitz which is better the. original Willy Wonka and the Chocolate. Factory or the remake Charlie and the. Chocolate Factory I don't even need to. finish that one the original dude when. you have little Charlie rolls up and.

they got for senior citizens Grandpa Joe. in his little harem bra and they all. wearing dirty nightgowns sleeping in one. bed come on boy that's like I mean that. thing is the closest thing we've seen to. Noah's Ark do when all four of them God. look at all Grandpa Joe's nightgown a. [ __ ] is dirty bruh. dude he's off anybody. there'd be more chocolate in a factory.

if Grandpa Joe hadn't been snacking on a. couple dude n is crazy we've seen four. senior citizens and dirty Knight gals. all laying there together that [ __ ] is. everything it's erotic in its you know. it's like early UFC almost kind of. there's something wild about it but. right there Tito which is also one of. the best names ever Tito Leibowitz is. that is that one right there the. original dude the original what they did.

in the original without all the CGI and. all the magical effects. now that was creativity and here's one. from jammy star would you upload your. consciousness to live on after you die. gang hmm. that's a good question. I don't know my consciousness because.

then you just be sitting alive somewhere. in a tank I would let my consciousness. be alive if it could be in like a. wishing well you know like a tank or. people could throw money and in wish I. think that'd be cool because then you. can see their wishes go by and you can. know that people are still hopeful I. think that made me feel pretty excited. but if you just put my consciousness out. like a dam footlocker or something then. I don't care about all that I have you. not want to be in there people just. trying on you know you know the new.

Steph Curry the Third's or whatever I. don't give a dang let's take another. call here do this is iam from Chicago. what's up being over there in Chicago. baby Illinois and man that's a beautiful. law beautiful state man dude if you. think about states Brian you think man. we're the good ones that is hard not to. stop thinking whenever you get to.

Illinois. oh we just want to thank you for all you. do for single moms and dads but I want. to make sure you know that you've been a. positive force for us married fathers to. I married my college sweetheart and we. have six kids who are 10 years apart so. [Music]. dude and is continued sexual that's what. that's called when you have six kids 10. years apart that means you guys.

continued to have sex boy that's. continued sexual and that's brave I feel. like. a lot of couples they have sex you know. for two years three years get the kids. and then they retreat to their neutral. corners you know and you know masturbate. in a shower or something or sneak off. every now and then to rush or something. but if you're doing continued sexual.

bullying over ten years let me give you. that and you think that's clapping no. that's you still smacking her let the. let my neighbor loose brother let him. hang outside of your window get let's. hear more having teenagers and young. adults is really hard in today's world. it's oh hell yeah dude. I've been to 7-eleven there's always.

teenagers and young adults hanging. outside of that [ __ ] vaping and just. look you know doing [ __ ] gang. homework. full social media and Instagram and. snapchat and there isn't a whole lot. that my kids want to talk to me about. what I've come to really enjoy is the. common bond that your podcast allows us. to talk and laugh about during the week. they all listen to it we all enjoy it. and it really is a common bond for us.

growing up in the 70s the common bond. with my dad with sports and my kids. aren't into sports there's oh man it's. got to be a little hectic sometimes that. the kids aren't into sports and you are. that's got to be tough and then you got. to adapt to if you're the father you. have to adapt you know let's hear a. little more you call thanks their. interests are all over the place. Computers music photography art so I.

feel very fortunate to have your weekly. podcast to talk to them about around the. dinner table I also love all the. positive messages that you weave into. your funny stories I think that. sometimes gets lost in everybody. laughing around the table but we all. come to recognize it and love the very. positive messages that you have around. gratitude and life in generals so thank. you and just to make my kids cringe if.

they hear this gang gang thank dang boy. dad hit him with that good that's what. I'm talking about Papa daddy sneaking in. Brian that's examen move wrong dude if. you hitting your kids with a gay guy. that's like when your son's about to get. a little better night you know that. significant other you feel me and you.

sneak in and put you know massaged his. shoulders right before he puts on that. condom you're filming that's beautiful. brother man Wow Wow bro your pal do you. should be in a museum if you've been. doing continued sexual with your lady. over a decade right you're probably in. the one you're probably in the two. percent of Americans that are doing that. most guys they bother wife that machine. even someone get that cheap when the. gas-powered one with that you know with.

that electric hitter on the front and. that's it. they never you know they Bay they see. their wife at mealtime and that's it and. like the kids graduations otherwise. every now and then she just puts an. empty gas can outside of a room door and. let you know that uh that she is doing. okay um no look I'm glad that uh. I'm glad did you guys listen man I think. it's interesting because I get little.

pieces of like family and I get little. pieces of you know one of the reasons. why I even let the voicemail go all the. way when I was listening was because I. wanted to just hear a dad's voice you. know I made that thought in my head real. fast my I said okay well I appreciate. the guy's message and I can talk about. it now and then my head said well you. know this is a father's voice so why. don't you just listen to it because you. don't get that all the time and and so.

thanks man I get to live vicariously. through you know images of you guys's. lives that I don't get him own life and. so you know thinking about what my. father how he would describe me or what. my interests were you know when hearing. somebody that cares this you know that. much about their kids you know you try. to describe a couple other different. interests and not just say you know that. they're all over the place you you know. you cared enough to a extrapolate on.

what they what they like to do you know. it's cool it makes me wonder how my dad. would be or what he would say or what he. would do or you know or if he and I. would bond over listening to some you. know some some guy some some Muppet. who's just rattling on every week but. thank you man I appreciate that sweet of. you to call and uh and it's nice that.

you still care enough I think that. that's a challenge these days probably. is just continuing to find ways to. relate to your kids and not be. disappointed if you can't and not give. up if you can't oh I saw this guy last. night feeding his kids food and the kids. were dressed like they're at this fancy. sushi place they're not even paying. attention he's got two kids both I'm. wearing white shirts they looked kind of. like a little bit of like maybe Latino. or Latino Hebrew but like fancy fancy.

Latino not like me Connell I'm talking. about like you know like Pablo Escobar's. little boys you know they're both. wearing collared shirts they the. as over there picking his teeth with. something probably the bone of a poor. person you know and and the kids remind. me of the Menendez boys I said aw damn. you know sashimi today you know such see. me today but uh and probably murder.

tomorrow this boy yeah I could just see. in 15 years that these boys was he. probably to be doing crime against their. own family they had that Menendez. brothers vibe to them so but yeah that's. beautiful man you got a nice family you. got spend time together and do stuff I. could imagine that people's junk is all. over and probably you got six kids dude. that's 12 chances to slip on a roller. skate bro when you just in the middle of. the night trying to go get a little.

glass of milk or something wrong you. know maybe a little pop-tart or. something without the frosting on it I. like I'm plain people look at me weird I. do so you know and I guess I'm just. happy that I'm not tearing families. apart you know I guess I have I'm glad I. haven't had to testify in like one of. those judge Judy's or something you know. or or anything like that but but thanks. for calling me and I really appreciate. it and and at some point you and your.

family will be able to go see this movie. man you know I guess I mean I'm really. scared about it you know it's a lot of. risk like just not knowing like what. exactly is gonna happen or you know how. it will all go down but I'm just trying. to be confident about it and hopeful. about it but that would be something. funny though that you guys could go see. me and laugh at that. I hope I'm gonna try to best my best to.

make you know make the the guy that I'm. you know uh you know being in the movie. just like a good guy and make him you. know and just represent us as good as I. can man and represent tpw I got this new. Rat King hitter actually as well we got. some new merchandise coming out this. weekend. but thank you guys man I'm getting my. brains getting a little bit of shook. right now you know and I want to. apologize again for having to adjust the.

dates and those are to be decided and. and you'll be emailed about a mom but. you know I hope that you know you'd be. patient with me and let me get back to. you and and bring you a good show and. the best show you know I think there's I. think that I think that if I can just. get some of the stress out of my system. then I'll be back into a better place I.

mean my life's changed so much in the. past year it's been hard man it's been. beautiful and awesome but uh but there's. a cost like for everything it's like you. know I didn't realize that I was just. stacking a lot I just uh just you know. just been a lot of stress and not even. realizing it man I didn't realize what. uh how intense it is and how much just. how much electricity's gotten in my fur. really I know I keep saying that but.

that's just how I feel I feel like if I. was at a petting zoo man I would say. look we this animals got to be in the. back for a couple weeks because he uh. we've been getting complaints you know. we been getting complaints but I want to. go longer but but I just feel I don't. guess I feel a little bit ashamed of. myself too that I'm cancelling the dates.

or that I'm rescheduling them so um but. but I'll be back I'll be there we'll. figure it out. you know we figured out a lot bigger. things than this after you and thank you. guys for your patience thank you guys. for your for calling in and and and for. the calls as always on the hotline nine. eight five six six four nine five zero. three we'll get into some deeper stuff. next time when I just have my wits a.

little bit thicker and. and that's it I'll tell you guys more as. I know more and and that's it man. you guys be good to yourselves and. thanks for being good to me over over. these past few weeks man I've just been. a man I just been like a just like a. rattle. you know just no snake and all rattle. baby. [Music].

I'm just sitting on your front porch. wondering how could I be so far from my. home and my mind is somewhere else but. when I founded our patch up where it's.

been grown now I'm just floating on the. breeze and I feel hopeful and like these. leaves that must be cornerstone oh but. when I reach that round I'll share this. peace of mind I can defeat it in my. thought it's gonna take. a little town for me to set that parking.

brake myself. me. [Music]. found of strong I was.

[Music]. moving way too fast on the runaway train. with the handle of matter in these wills. that are been robbed no they want so. this template damn there. [Music]. to make sense a word I came.

if you call my name. [Music].

ah.

[Music]. [Applause].