Dane Cook | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #178

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slash Theo von today's episode is with a. gentleman male comedian who has who has. certainly been. through it all he has a new tour that's. actually gonna be in st. Louis this. Friday night tomorrow you can get. tickets to see him and and I'm happy. he's here in studio today it is mr. Dane. Cook.

[Music]. [Music]. what was was Danny ak what was like a. name that fans cuz fans pick up my kind. of name sometime yeah and I feel like. that what they called himself I feel. like it never turns out well yeah I had. Danny Danny acts actually they tried to.

do that and I'd killed that oh yeah no. no and then the Dame train yeah it's. what I joined one day and I was like. okay that sounds kind of cool get on the. Dane train get off the danger like a. [ __ ] Doobie Brothers song or. something like that I was that was and. I'm glad that [ __ ] for a little bit but. and a train it gives a fan something to. get off of like our your support or. something you know right we're gonna. bring it into the station yeah you go. home you have yourself a nice meal yeah. and then get back on the damn train and. we'll head to the next destination yeah. at least it's open till like if people.

are like hey you know I've been on here. for a couple years I'm ready to step off. and then you know I'm ready to get on. you know it like gives the opportunity. because otherwise yeah what if somebody. gets a tattoo that they're a day niak. and then six years later they're like. people have gotten tattoos I mean I've. seen people with my face on their inner. thigh Wow like such a weird if I was. gonna get your face anywhere on my body. I don't know if I'd go Phi yeah you know. maybe just go back and you kind of make. it like you know just a presentation if. you're you know down by the local pool.

but yeah a little bit of the past then. or then it's like yeah something in the. front thigh right in here man or woman. it was uh it was a dude yeah yeah it was. a guy he he actually had a lot of. comedians on his body was it was like a. tribute to all things comedy oh that's. pretty cool yeah man it was awesome Wow. what are your fans call you or call. themselves do they are they trying to. come up with like do we have anything. Nick I got one okay what about this. ready the crispy wontons hey what's up.

all the crispy wontons out there your. chinese fans would really really play. into that exactly pretty good we only. have I think one Chinese fan all right. yeah well you know what you're the. crispy Vaughn. you're the start yeah cuz that seems. kind of yelling it gets kind of crazy. when you start having like fans and. supporters you know yeah I really when I. turned a corner of being absolutely you.

know out of any kind of conversation to. having people you know wanted like know. more about me beyond comedy that's when. it got a little funky because I was like. oh I'm really different from you know. the persona so that's the only part that. was tricky I love the correspondence. with fans when we were talking shop. talking comedy talking bits talking you. know whatever is coming up next when. they were like what makes you sad yeah. like I don't know if I could share that.

information. oh that's all what our whole podcast is. based on my whole podcast is based on. like you know just things that I've. thought or felt or yeah yeah well now. like now I'm like the opposite now I can. dig super deep and I've kind of been. through every incarnation of a career so. it's like now this is perfect because. I've 29 years later grown into the idea. of like being introspective is actually. way more exciting than just being. observant of behavior yeah yeah yeah.

because I was reading like some people. cuz you're definitely like a performer. you know and I've always been big on. I've never been a like I respect joke. writers but I like Wow I personally. enjoy watching a performer right you. know it's why I love like Sebastian. Maniscalco yes you know it's like it's. one of the reasons why i like watching. crystal yeah like i like watching. something her yeah you know and it. seemed like but performers it seems like. don't get as much credit from the media.

at all yeah it's similar to like how. most of the time like bombastic movies. that are like action-oriented. doesn't get the same kind of critical. acclaim as something that's just you. know a little dour and yeah when in. dramatic it's bonkers it's like the same. amount of effort energy creativity. impact all that stuff needs to come. together in order to make an act like. that and I'm the same way I grew up. Jerry you know Jerry Lewis.

Steve Martin dice. you know PIPA Martin Short I just like. people that went for it ya know and but. as I got a little bit older started to. realize odd if you can if you can work. this craft and try to build yourself up. there's a way to actually have that and. then bring something that's written or. more introspective to it which is kind. of cool now and you feel like so chief. like you're doing that more with your. new tour with this new tour that you're. going on now yeah it's different between.

it like if you're a fan coming out you. know that came out you know that was on. the Dane train in the beginning you know. that was on because it was really like a. rock it was that like a rocket ship when. you cuz I mean it really wasn't because. it was a slow burn it probably felt that. way for a lot of people that you know or. suddenly were like smacked in the face. of like who's this named Dane Cook I. keep hearing the college market I had. for all of the 90s been just like chip. and went out and you know just like.

party and after with everybody and just. trying to ingratiate myself and and and. also it was just fun you know cuz I was. a kid you know you know making a little. money having some fun but I always. understood the the campaign element of. it which is if I want to you know be. elected comedian of the year until my. service is over like I'm gonna have to. get as many people on board without a TV. show without I didn't have a lot of. supply k-- the just for all I was. talking to Bruce Hills at just for.

laughs I said you never had me on one. new faces I just didn't have any of the. industries of course s support early and. it's probably good because it just made. me have to cultivate my own means they. don't get it seems like yes I can wonder. why they don't I think a lot of them yet. like scares them or something to believe. that it makes it feel like it's not. about the entertainment anymore it's. just about what the industry kind of. wants to push sometimes right right it's. it's what's relevant right now today and. it and I I'm probably I'm not going to.

be a hypocrite I've been guilty of it. myself where it's like you just glom on. to something because everybody's so. enthusiastic about it but with time and. you're gonna learn this as well and I've. talked to people before me that. in this corner there's a there's a. moment there's a process during your. career where you start to earn a. pedigree while you start to you're. seasoned and that's actually when a. performer I think is more interesting.

you know the trajectory it's great shiny. new exciting what they do with that and. how we evolve and how we communicate. with each other and then to the crowd I. feel like a 30 years in almost that I'm. just getting good I'm just using all the. tools in the arsenal to tell the kind of. stories that I've always hoped to tell. and we to answer your question directly. what's different about the tour now is. yeah there's more introspection because. I have more hindsight to play off. observational II but it's my height size. it's it's my story my UPS my downs and.

the thing that was the probably the. trickiest about this tour and this time. was I just didn't want it to be a. one-man show I love one-man shows but I. didn't want my show to be something less. than what people had seen before I. wanted the same LPM s laughs per minute. with all the new tools that I had in my. arsenal which took a little it'll took a. little time to get around that that that. turn so but it seems like oh I mean like. Divina comedies a one-man show when you.

sue when you say you don't want it to be. a one-man show like what do you mean. though yeah like I didn't want it to be. introspective to the point where it. wasn't very entertaining yeah you know I. wondered if you saw me 20 years ago the. greatest compliment I've gotten this. last weekend might or just recently. started is people saying seen you eight. times was at Madison Square Garden was. at this was out that this is my favorite. show I've seen you do and people saying. honestly I didn't know you could do that. I wasn't sure if you could exceed my.

expectations again but the show is as. good if not better than other shows I've. seen you do in the past and that that's. the greatest as a comedian except for. people quote in your [ __ ] and saying it. back to you which is fun you feel like. Mark Twain for a little bit right it's. it's really it's it's kind of one of the. coolest aspects of still being able to. do it at the level that I. been doing it yeah it's cool do you feel. you've always seemed to me like kind of.

abhi like a lone wolf kind of do you. feel that I think that in I don't feel. that in life I feel like if anything I. it's an embarrassment of riches with how. many great mentors and friends that I. have in in and out of comedy but when. you're 28 years old and you hit the. stratosphere nobody can talk to you. about that nobody understands it and. perception takes over because then.

people start to believe that maybe. you're not accessible and in who is. accessible to you you don't find out two. years later bullshitters people want to. make a little scratch right people that. see something to gain scoundrels [ __ ]. it's like most Eisley cantina from Star. Wars like all the scum and villainy. wants to seek you out because they want. they want a piece of a sparkle man yeah. everybody wants some of the sparkle you. see somebody with sparkle it's like oh.

[ __ ] I want to I want to glimmer with. that person but now what happens like. but Dee it's always seem like you do you. have this thing really it's like you you. have to I have to do this myself because. it always seems like you are this. different kind of like you're like Pluto. kind of a little bit not that you're out. pushed to the outside yeah but that you. choose to kind of be in this you know. like yeah you don't know if I'm a planet. or a ball of ice yeah I'm a thing or. just like a rumor that science made up. you know yes yeah you don't really know.

like is this guy a planet is this guy a. ball of ice I like you see you see him. like that you seem so just a regular. comedian coming up yeah it's like who is. just like everybody else seems a little. bit more accessible a little bit more. you feel bad I don't feel about with a. lot of comedians. yeah maybe and that could is but your. graduating my profession your graduating. class in my in my graduating class I. wouldn't feel that way about the comics. I came up with him around but I think it.

maybe it's generational when I met. people ahead of me I was intimidated to. go up and talk to them you know what I. did I did the same thing people. to put on me which is they don't want to. talk to me why would that person care. about me why would I'd see David Spade. or Chris Rock when I was young in New. York why would they care about talking. to me so what did I do I projected. they're probably too cool for school. yeah until finally you're at the comic. table with somebody or we're John like. this and you're like oh [ __ ] no that's. it's not that crazy yeah no it's.

definitely I don't feel like the warden. of the north. like some Game of Thrones thing where. I'm I'm on Pluto or something on the far. outside I do like that that's part of. the interpretation of what I am because. it's a whole hell of a lot more. interesting to be somebody who where. people want to put their hand on their. chin and go let's go then somebody was. like yeah yeah yeah we got it we got it. I never wanted to be that I thought I. was that I actually thought I was like. yo yo we get it you move around a lot on. stage and trying to write some stuff we.

get it and dismissed but if anything the. polarizing was like oh good yeah I'm not. milquetoast I'm not [ __ ] boring right. I'm interesting I'm almost like a little. bit of a good guy bad guy you don't know. how I'm Lance what I feel like with you. it seemed like the antihero yeah I mean. you know what it was fun it's been fun. has that been a goal it seems like. because you I feel like you you. definitely seem like obviously super. aware especially comedians or hyper. aware yes who we are and what's going on.

I think anyway a lot of in super. sensitive and super sensitive yeah which. is one of the reasons you have to be. hyper aware because you have to know are. those things kind of go together because. it's like you're so aware that it makes. you overly sensitive because you're. taking in so much that there's so many. ways that you could feel that we could. feel offended yeah easily so we're so. you know aware and then so sensitive at. the same time yeah I think that we're a. lot of comics I think what we do is we. you know we ruminate and we are we're. seeing 10 different incarnations of what.

could be and what does that do that that. that then makes you start preparing for. what if a happens what if B happens we. exert a lot of energy even in our stuff. dude it is exhausting yeah and hyper. where yes Austin having to constantly. like protect yourself from like seven. different ways of feeling uncomfortable. right you know you ever hear those. stories about Jim Carrey early on in his. career when he would. he had this and did you ever work with. him no I never had the opportunity to. work with him but I've I've worked with.

people that have collaborated with him. and I I usually don't just on hearsay. I need like a few different people to. validate and I started hearing from a. few different folks that like back in. the day when he would go to a party if. he thought people were gonna [ __ ] with. him doing what we're doing thinking up. so and so is gonna be there what if she. says this what if he says that that he. would sit and pre-plan some stuff to you. know roast you or haze you right so you. couldn't hurt him some eight-mile [ __ ]. man he had like it already on tap he'd.

practice you know imagine the energy. that that took because what if you had. eleven people yeah your [ __ ] neck. right he yeah he that's the neck you. wore yeah I could see him yeah here we. go. he would go deep cuts yeah on that [ __ ]. and and I understand a little bit of. that I think that I think that the you. know if you're thinking about a career. in comedy what you got to realize is.

it's it's an amazing community it's a. brotherhood I mean that guys and girls. but it's also really cutthroat and it's. also sometimes it's very participatory. and sometimes it's very isolating you. know and you got to know what you need. to be at what point right. and that's hard to know and I had to. learn the hard way which was pretty much. on my own but then meeting mentors along. the years that were the knowledge that. they passed on to me helped me to figure.

out what a career really is and there's. gonna be a crest and you're gonna dip. and it's gonna come up and then it. there's so many more elements than just. what we do on stage right you know when. you so when your career like blew up you. know cuz I mean you had what I mean and. I've talked about this even in. discussions about you when you weren't. around that you were like kind of the. Steve Martin of our time in the way that. well some of you know that somebody no. one has that I mean that's such a rare.

thing that somebody has you know has. that trajectory yeah yeah it's just a. rare thing it happens to someone. you know and it happened to you and not. saying that you're you know obviously. you did the work but what happens like. with your ego in that part that's. something we always talk about it. because that one of my scariest things. to me is my own ego right because it's. such a it's me and I know that I'm. crafty and then I'm cunning yeah and so. I know that my ego is that as well right. like what happened like with the like. did you find for yourself what I found. was maybe a little different because I.

had grown up so as an introvert I had. grown up with a lot of fear I grew up as. a self-loathing. manok I was in an environment of there. was alcoholism in my family yeah there's. a lot heaviness and I felt like I grew. up fast so the years that I spent doing. stand-up leading up to what would. seemingly be an overnight sensation 15.

years later the ego stuff really wasn't. like a bravado or some kind of cockiness. it was really more of oh I'm finally. starting to feel like I can love myself. because I obtained something in life. where I didn't really know what I would. get to you know I pipe dreamed a lot of. stuff Steve Martin and dice and seeing. these guys definitely always have those. in your head especially if you're in.

this business and you're seeing other. people have those things yeah and so I. think that too if I'm if I'm. understanding correctly it's like to me. like ego was like I'd be at the cellar. when I was still new and Chris Rock. would come in he bumped me he bump. anybody and that was that was like that. was part of it that was kind of like a. rite of passage as a comedian like okay. some big star bigger stars gonna come in. and so when I made it I was like oh I. can do that too. you know I can walk into the Laugh. Factory which is primarily where I would. just go and feel like I can do what I. want this is I've arrived so that was.

something I needed to get through the. rotating door about to realize like no. they're still actually like it's still. procedural and you can still have. respect for your peers and there's a way. to do that that's more appropriate than. just a barnstorming a club and then. right you know so I. I got my knocks I learned some lessons. learned earlier yeah yeah yeah and only. because certain names and some odd names. you know would reach out and I can't do. that man you know you don't want you.

don't want to do that you want to try to. play it like this or and so I you know I. learned as I went and now I try to kind. of what we're doing here pass on to. whoever the next girl or guy is coming. up to say like you know when people say. stay humble that's no [ __ ] you know. really try to you know keep yourself as. modest and you know it's nice to be self. affirming but you got a you got a you. got to be able to like if you're gonna. get a a huge level of of power in in any.

industry really like how you manage that. in how it it reverberates off you to. others that impacts you years later when. that person says hey thanks for being. cool to me yeah you know thanks for. being I'm a more time like Tosh he got. really mad at me we were I didn't never. was really close to him and we were in. the Laugh Factory Lobby once and I. usually talk out of school but like this. is one of those stories that and I think. I had put my hand out to him and he was.

like no man no I need you in my life he. said something that was really kind of. harsh and I was like Daniel what I'm. just you know Congrats on the success. and all that and he was not interested. in having that conversation because I. had not been I had not been cordial to. him coming up I probably didn't take the. time on many nights at the factory to to. hobnob or just yeah just to I had not. realized that the level of influence.

that I had that that younger comedians. at that moment not now but at that. moment like that would hurt them if I. were to walk by and not acknowledge them. but I wasn't doing it to hurt anybody I. was just still an introvert in many ways. right you know it's it's a man it's. [ __ ] it's perplexing in a paradox. sometimes even you know for me we had a. very deep conversation off pod and you. know we're we're we're complex you know.

we're complex means you and I have never. been like clothes. but we just seen each other clubs talk. to a few times and and yeah and then I. came up to your house and and we hung. out that time yeah it was definitely. interesting because I didn't know yeah. it's like I feel like other comedians. are you kind of get a vibe from and you. kind of get an understanding of and you. just kind of seem like that like that. rare element that's kind of like well. what's going on with this guy like this. guy this guy's out this guy's kind of. seems like a lone wolf to me yeah I. guess that in terms of how I came up in.

comedy that's a fair assessment because. I wasn't in a pack that was all doing. arenas and and Billboard charts and. top-selling platinum albums I I was. alone yeah I was really alone there. wasn't another person dice was 25 years. ahead of me having done Madison Square. Garden 1990 and I bumped him to omit. Mulberry Street pizza when I was like it. was like oh 506 and everything I was by. myself just having a slice just [ __ ].

sitting there you know napkins on my. face he sat right in front of me and I. got to you know have this conversation. with an icon somebody I looked up to and. and I felt like finally I was talking. with somebody who really understood what. I was talking about the hardships that. within the loneliness you know there. there was some loneliness I was like I. got here because I wanted to be in the. community and share but I didn't know I. was gonna seemingly skyrocket to where. people felt like a disappointment I.

wanted to I thought that was good for. the business of all comedy right you. know because in the 90s comedy albums. were dead. everybody was telling me comedy was kind. of like you know after the boom of the. 80s everybody told me they're like. comedy isn't like you know it was. oversaturated Comedy Central wasn't. putting on people that were really. seasoned and Yeti and so there was a. period of time where comedy was a little. bit bottom of the totem pole and I felt. like hey I'm I think I'm helping to shed. light on a new generation of comedy fans.

yeah so outside perspective very. different about what people felt of me. to what I was hoping that I was. emulating out there for others you know. yeah. and jealousy probably was huge I mean I. can only imagine that like Jeff. cuz everybody was a little bit jealous. the Dane Cook I think. you know I think that what happened was. a lot of comics would say to me man I'm. so sick of DJs and people that are. interviewing me for my show I'm trying. to build saying literally saying why. don't you do what Dane does yeah why.

aren't you and it was frustrating. why heard you say on stage one time this. one of the most interesting things I've. ever heard someone say on stage. you said yeah I've been going to therapy. a lot recently and it's interesting that. I'll sit down i sat down in the. therapists office for the first time and. they're like oh Dane Cook I've heard a. lot I've heard your name a lot in here. from other comedians yeah and that was. like such an interesting I just remember. hearing that man and that was such an. interesting thing yeah it was it was. weird. you know I remember that moment and.

being like because he had worked with a. lot of comedians I was recommended by it. right yeah yeah the kimete comedy. community like you should talk to him. because he he gets it he knows the world. of comedy his opening line literally was. your name comes up a lot in here man. yeah it's like the vulnerability in that. moment of being like been wanting to. know what are they source of course that. would be so bizarre because then it's. like there's so much of you going on. outside of you right lots of you and.

such a conversation of you outside of. you right and it wasn't till sometime. that certain comics had you know come to. me and said one comedian she was shoe so. I I don't want a name-dropper if she. wants to come forward and say Bobby. Whitney Cummings but it was not winning. but I love Whitney but this comedian. came to me and just said you know I it. took me a while and I was one of the. people that bashed you I misjudged you I. and she's like a lot of that was my own.

feeling of not getting to you know what. I was hoping the fear you know it's. really like everything comes back to. love and fear man what drives us oh yeah. and what we you know what we want to. hold on to and and what we want to pass. up on why do you think you were like. easy to hate okay question well look I. was like young and wearing [ __ ] cool. junior it's like did you ever be honest. dude yeah I never wore fur okay faux fur.

whoa is that first hopefully I would. assume being from su jugo it's real fur. dude that's Paul Revere country you guys. have earned the real fur but did you. ever wear fur no I did not no no we. didn't but my mom and some fur so I. probably did throw one of my mom's but. not once you got it popular no once I. once I made it I was it was like you. know tight shirts and you know the image. that I was trying to create Steve Martin. the white suit the the the dichotomy of.

being like hey I'm dressed up really. nice but I'm being like wacky and and. then dice of course the element of of. like badass and cool Eddie Murphy in the. you know leather outfit I was figuring. out hey you know what my thing is like. I'm I'm coming up with this next. generation in dudes or more fashionista. in many ways then you know in the past. so I just found my niche and I played up. on that and then I I could understand. years later looking back like oh my god.

I wouldn't have liked that guy. you know it's it's you know hindsight is. an incredible incredibly prolific thing. and you don't know at the time you just. think you're you know I don't know just. you're doing the best you can to try to. create an image that that resonates yeah. you know and you did a great job so at. certain points because when you say like. you know the gel Waseem did it a feel I. wasn't I wasn't looking at that I was. looking at 20,000 people I wasn't.

looking at the one guy in the comment. section who was right of course yeah you. know so looking the messer. square garden you're looking at the the. proof that was in front of you yeah was. that everything I'm doing is right yeah. it was like I was just looking at the. love from the fans that I had found or. who found me so it really didn't hit me. until many many years later of like oh. wow there's really some genuine. animosity and it's just up to me to have. conversations like this with my peers. with the Brotherhood of Comedy to say.

I'm accessible and you know you know if. you're a fan I'm accessible you could. DME I right everybody back so yeah. people write me and say hey man I'm. having a shitty day and I go here's what. you need to do. yes I'm super sensitive and I'm. empathetic to. that so the perception of me very. different than who I am when I'm just. you know at home kicking it yeah yeah. it's interesting yeah cuz that's what I. mean yeah if I'm real candid it was just. like yeah what is daint like Dane seems. like this I don't know yeah like this.

kind of like this Pluto kind of like. this thing where people don't know but. for some reason people have felt rubbed. the wrong way you know. yeah then also has probably had the. ability to gain garner a huge amount of. jealousy over time as well so yeah. there's a lot of factors in there I bet. it was probably hard to sift through. some of that if you even wanted to look. at it yeah it was it was like because it. it didn't it wasn't even though it. wasn't affecting me directly in terms of. like business it affected like my fans.

didn't like feeling like they were yeah. then if you were a Dane fan then it was. like weird. right there was a period where it's like. people were like hey am i I say I like. you and then I get attacked by other. people yeah but we use I'm in a. wheelchair because yeah Madison Square. Garden 20,000 see what you start to. realize what's going on here's the. here's the breakthrough breaking news in. what everybody learns when you become. successful and what you're learning you. know you right now you're in the UH pink.

cloud phase everything's you know. everybody's fighting in discovering and. passing around everything is mediocre. everything every single thing is. mediocre Arrowsmith I love them there's. somebody going and I don't it's not my. thing. you can't name a book a magician nobody. athlete a name a magician a magician's. you know can we just omit images are. comedians arch-nemesis that should be. Wells is it yeah it should be a movie.

dude and it definitely should be a movie. who else could our arch-nemesis be no. that's it and have you win that's it. that run right there but I interrupted. but I don't know everything is you find. out success introduces you to mediocrity. because then everybody outside of your. realm is gonna tell you why you're not. that great in what. talks about you you know you can we're. watching careers right now of people.

let's just say in the last five years. and what do they do they get white-hot. and then you know and then it's like the. spanking machine everybody's gonna get. tagged and we're gonna find things out. that we don't like about them and then. what happens is your your fan base the. bottom of the V right here there's still. you know pretty much rock-solid in place. most of them and then everybody out here. is in the business of telling you yeah. we don't care all right and they wanted. to tell you and they're gonna reach out. to tell you all we can do just come up.

with the next set next joke get up on. stage try to have a few more laughs with. our friends family and then do one more. show and that's that's what I'm doing. yeah we definitely seem to be really. fearless you know that's for sure like. just because I grew up in fear to. continue to keep your head down and keep. going grew up in fear grow when you grew. up in a fear-based. which I was then man just you know once. I once I found this conduit comedy once.

I had that it was like the dilithium. crystal I had [ __ ] superpowers I had. this ability to actually be present and. important to people when I didn't even. feel important to myself right it took a. long time for all those things to equate. a well-rounded healthy lifestyle. on and off stage you know to be able to. have great conversations like this yeah. you know do you um did you have an idea.

what you thought it like being a star. was there something like that before you. like hit like a level of stardom. popularity oh what a great question man. that that I remember Rob you know seeing. guys like Robin Williams playing like. GARP and like a Warlick arena guard yeah. that's one of my favorite books of all. time love it book amazing the film you. know awesome he was awesome and I was. looking at a lot of comedic actors and.

admiring that they could tell different. kinds of story they could make you laugh. maybe they could make you cry. to me that was like an interesting route. for a career so what I did and where it. plays into the question is like I I took. my foot off the gas of what I knew. people had discovered me as and was like. I'm gonna downshift and try to go in.

that direction so I can have some more. credibility and outside of comedy. deconstructed myself really in the mid. you know 2000 hear me like with films. and stuff like that with me at work. because then I started getting some. opportunity to do things that were very. different from stand-up based on my. stand-up and Kevin Costner was a fan of. my stand-up and then said do you want to. play a serial killer in this movie with. me and it was like suddenly that was. when I felt a certain level of stardom. when I was not so much from the comedy.

ever but from the being received in a. this all comes back to inclusion and. feeling isolated as a kid you know Kevin. Costner's and Demi Moore's and Juliette. Binoche and Steve Carell people that I. love to watch them do things that were. so drastically different we're now. saying hey you you know right yeah you. ever then you're gonna marry one of us. so that's when I started to feel a bit. of oh wow I I'm in a I'm in a different. circle right an inner circle and do you.

do you feel like then you start treating. people different like like was it was. over point you felt like like looking. back like oh I was an [ __ ] you know I. never felt like I was an [ __ ] I never. felt like I had never gotten to a place. where I like I had seen some other. comedians in some other behaviors you. know there was any Griffin is who. there's there are some magicians out. there I'd [ __ ]. Siegfried and Tiger face whatever that. guy's name was about uh I saw some.

behavior and other not even just. comedians but just in other celebrities. you know having been in LA for bed and I. thought it was really deplorable and I. wanted to be a person that if you could. approach me if you felt like I was. approachable that you know there was. something to be gleaned from both my. success and failure so I I never felt. like an [ __ ] I. I would listen to people talk about you. know Joan Rivers I'd never met and she. called me an [ __ ] on Stern I'd never. met her I never made her Joan Rivers. joke I respected that woman yeah she you.

know he was cool build it in and cool. and funny and always funny she used all. the racial slurs once on TMZ until one. of my favorite clips I'll watch it at. nights and that's for bed put on some. creams and then your top he's like some. buddies of this and some buddies of this. and some buddies of this and some. buddies of this and people's need to get. used to it well Joan you know called me. an [ __ ] and I remember I was you. never met her never met her never met. her and I was man I was like mortified. why did you think that.

oh I either a I'm such an [ __ ] that. it's reached Joan Rivers like the rumor. of it know that what is going on that. people think this or just that I become. a name that people for some reason. associate with it you know what if I was. gonna get really if I was gonna go deep. into like the the the human element did. the it'd super it'd what's going on with. this I would say I the one thing I. didn't realize how to do was reach out. early in my career when I broke through.

to to celebrate some of the comedian's. that came before me if I met you I would. I would I met dice at the pizza pies and. and I can only I'm guess I'm guessing. but maybe it maybe it hurt her that I. had arrived and maybe didn't shout her. out right you know cuz we're all so. [ __ ] sensitive yeah and what I've. learned about her from other people as. hey man she was she was very sensitive. to see where were all that and so the. having people call you an [ __ ] from. time to time is it was actually kind of.

it was confusing. was it uplifting in a weird way though. was a party or ego or part of you I mean. it part of any of our ego or like at. least they're talking about me. well the the part that you because. you've had and I ask you this because. you've had some I mean you know there's. not anybody else that I could think of. that's had the same story that you've. had that's being considered you know. being ostracized in a way where people.

think you're like the bad guy or an. [ __ ] or whatever is for me I can only. talk about my experience but for me it. was. like good this is an armor to keep the. people that have hurt me my whole life. away because they're a little scare to. me because they think I'm something. beyond just a regular guy which I'm just. a regular dude I'm just funny yeah an. hour and a half on stage and otherwise. I'm pretty basic you know I'm jeans and. t-shirt kind of guy and you know so that.

to that extent I didn't mind I didn't. mind everybody having an opinion on me. and I didn't really mind if it was harsh. it just started to hurt when my fans. were really including my family you know. even my family like why this tabloid say. this about you were that's when it. started get a little confusing yeah cuz. I was like oh I'm just here to make. people laugh and you know I get it you. know buddy loves everything right people. don't love you but it was a weird you. know even looking back and talking about.

it now it's still like what did I ever. do to anybody except just try to get. laughs the greatest thing that we can do. is try to get laughs you know yeah I'm. trying to it wasn't like I'd get laughs. and people would be withering and dying. and it's like give me all the power of. laughs right where it's like you would. leave an empty [ __ ] theater of just. corpses and you're like I'm an [ __ ]. I steal Souls it was just like no I just. want to make you forget about your. [ __ ] hardship for a little bit and if. people take issue with that then that's.

what other people think of you is none. of your business. yeah you know what I try to I try to. implement that yeah I don't know why I. wonder why that thing why that thing. surrounded you so much then that it was. like armor the first time yeah I just. wonder why that surrounded you so but it. doesn't now it's just kind of funny. because if you talk to people now or. even somebody talks to you it's like no. once you talk to me and once you hang. with me be like oh maze he's pretty. level-headed you know I'm not a person.

that has a lot of foibles otherwise man. I'm right I'm pretty uh you know I'm a. I'm a Boston kid and we say it like it. is and wear our heart on our sleeves and. I'm not into playing a character I'm. into my journey for the next many years. my life is like. be more present how can I be more real. how can I be more authentic yeah you. know organic that's that's my journey. now Wow. yeah it's interesting man it's such a.

yeah cuz after we hung out I was like I. was like I don't know what I don't know. if you know I didn't know what thing I. was like Dane seemed so like normal and. and a knitted I had never and I told you. my preconceived notion to you yeah I was. very honest with you about saying hey. man I prejudged you as well I thought. like oh this is a guy that's like trying. to make it out of some other career and. yeah is he really a purist and and I was. you know I I wrongly did the same thing. yeah I took that card you left my house.

that day and I was like I could grab a. lunch with that guy yeah I like him you. know you're really you're deep you're a. deep guy and you're [ __ ] funny. you know you're you're you're funny you. deliver on stage everybody knows that. everybody at about it so I admire that. but I like that you can do this right. you know I wish in some ways I had more. of this maybe around that time right. where the [ __ ] were you Theal you could. have helped come on crispy Vaughn tongs. let's go hashtag crispy Vaughn tons.

let's go to we have fans of submitted. questions they love this okay so and I. actually had one too you okay you talked. about or you've never drank or smoked or. done a drug at all fact it's like when. you were at your darkest did that even. cross your mind is like a something to. turn to no plus he did why not no I just. never it was not it truly was not. something that was on my radar and. growing up as a you know I'm an adult. child I'm an alcoholic yeah so I would.

be an alcoholic I would definitely be an. alcohol you might be just a dry one be. I'm not but I'm not addicted I don't. have an addictive personality outside so. I don't know if I would that's a good. but I'm intense. yeah I'm intense you know competitive. with myself I think I say years ago if I. did drink I'd probably need to be the. drunkest person in the room because it's. like I know I just have to you want to. win I want to win I want to show myself. that I can do more but it never it never.

was very interesting to me. it wasn't my thing you could even. sometimes people with alcoholic parents. they end up repeating the same patterns. I think it's like impressive well my mom. said to me one day your dad was really. brilliant he was a brilliant guy he was. a BC graduate in the business man she. said just and she goes and he [ __ ] up. because he gets in his own way and he he. breaks everything down that he was. building up and so I was like if I don't. imbibe maybe I can build up and not have. the breakdown right portion so you know.

but I might start doing heroin man I've. been thinking about it oh dude Ivan do. you know what I'm at that age Roger will. probably help oh yeah. I could see it a little here I mean you. take a little weight off though I don't. know if your face but I wouldn't mind. that that would be but do you find you. have it do you have like an obsessive. given addiction you think with working. out or like an obsessive like cuz you. always are like you definitely seem. jacked no I don't I mean I don't have. some I don't have like a regiment. I do love working out because it's good.

for my brain yeah I think a lot of when. I'm like doing cardio and coming up with. ideas you know I do have a lot of energy. I'm you know the energy people see on. stage it's not put on right that that's. love of the game energy when I get up. there I have to temper it sometimes I'm. so excited yeah I think maybe that's one. thing that makes you like confuse or has. made you confusing to people I think. your energy is just different it's very. frenetic you have this like you know. it's very different than a guy you would. think maybe see a guy doing comedy it's.

like an anomaly in a way yeah I don't. know i guess i watch other comics that. you know have energy and I guess maybe. because how I came up I can look at. somebody else and go this is this is uh. this is organic this is like the they. love the movement and stuff not as a not. as a character or a lair right but. they're just so enthused to be you know. and then the whole you know ego of. having people around you love you and.

care about what you're saying on top of. the artistry of performing man it's it's. it can be very um it could be elusive. and it could also be very addictive yeah. you know yeah let's hear this cool. vo dang what's going on guys had a quick. question for you what is your most proud. moment as a comedian well just a moment. that might stand out to you or give you.

the most joy that's it Thank You. gang hey gang man you've had a lot to. pick from we'll let you choose first you. me go first okay um I think it would. probably have to no I know it would be. the I posted twice but the first time I. hosted Saturday Night Live yeah because. isn't that what happened was that I'm. gonna give you the the abridged version. cuz it's actually more convoluted but I.

wanted to be on the show for years saw. when I was a kid and was like that's. where I belong this circus of freaks and. whatever these weird characters and wigs. even weird wigs. yeah who does want to wear a [ __ ]. weird wig and go to work and like to. avoid right I was like I love that now. whatever that outlet is I need to plug. into that so that's a lunch lady live. too I would I would watch the show and I.

would dream about doing the show and. then years later Lauren Michaels came. and saw me at the comic strip in New. York City my career was already starting. to really roll we were talking about. maybe potentially doing like a Billy. Crystal one season thing right come in. and just be like a comic for one year on. there and do skits and stuff but that. kind of fell through and so then I said. to Lauren that night after we talked at. the comic strip I said Lauren I yeah I'd.

love to host and he said to me he's like. yeah that's not gonna happen and I was. like why and he goes cuz that's not. that's not how we do it anymore I go. yeah but Carlin in in Pryor and all. these guys like they would do the. monologue and it was different cause it. was stand-up not a skit and he's like. yeah that's it's it's passe we're not. doing it and then four months later. retaliation came out number four on the. Billboard charts I'm in a hotel in Vegas. for the Comedy Festival Lorne Michaels. he called me up hello hey man you're. hosting gonna give me a date right.

so Wow what did you do after young with. the phone be honest a jerk-off or not. [ __ ] four times in a row I didn't. even have anything inning at the end my. phone just air game oh dude yeah and. Fetty came out of my [ __ ] hole oh yeah. that's called Apollo 17 and it went this. [ __ ] there's nothing at the end. that's one that blew I like that where. you got the Apollo 17 Pluto there's kind. of a whole astrological and astronomy. the honestly do you think you jerked off. or not on oh I died I will I flipped out. man. if you ever jerk off you see my god.

maybe I'm not a big guy you know III you. know I pick my moment and then it's like. when I do it's it's a party you know but. some guys are like I got a buddy he's. like dude got a jerk-off every day. sometimes two three times yeah that's. too much man SFO or listeners and I'm. like 80 days off of pornography right. now so huh. who died this past weekend I had the. first weekend on the road where I didn't. jerk off or didn't think about it Wow. the first weekend yeah in 15 years of.

doing stand-up so that's how I know that. there's positive stuff and not watching. pornography oh my yeah I think that's. smart man that's an interesting you. talking about that in your stand-up - no. I just oh no not yet and when we talk. about it on the podcast a lot we have a. lot of guys you jerk off and are trying. not to so no it's never been my prime. directive that would be like most of my. life goal is try not to jerk off I was. more like no I actually want to meet a. beautiful woman in like try to you know. actually have sex with a woman now for. many years that was my honey I don't.

touch myself oh I had that goal and you. know a jerk off in this ruin that goal. you know I was sitting there ruin him. own goal you ever just get with the girl. and then jerk off and just have it like. you know a twofer my thing now is I. don't if I have sex with a girl I'm not. coming that's fur I do that by myself so. um you know okay. because women one who does your playing. hardball you know that's how I feel dude. I'm not doing that you're not getting. that baby girl oh my god this is where. you would go to a commercial break that. would be the perfect so Lord Michaels. call yeah man you have that conversation.

in Vegas you must have got off the phone. and felt pretty I was emotional you know. yeah motional because it was really you. know the kids are great yeah yeah yeah. the kid. from seventh grade that dreamt the whole. thing it was like validation boom that. day I've had a few moments in my career. where I felt like really embraced but. that standing backstage at SNL hearing. the band play being in that dark back. area looking through the beveled glass.

and seeing the crowd a little bit warped. and then opening that door up and. knowing I'm I'm here cuz I did it I did. it all myself I'm not on a hit show I'm. not on a hit anything yeah I'm just a. dude it gets up there and sling some. haha for a little bit and I made it all. the way to SNL you know it shows you. anything is possible really anything is. possible man it's like just you know. whatever you want to come to fruition. it's all hard work any any time you fail. any time people don't make it to where. they they feel like they want to get to.

I feel like a lot of that is. self-imposed really I think we put the. obstacles in front of ourselves yeah. yeah yeah I think that sometimes we it's. just the human condition is like we want. to you know human beings were not. exactly programmed to be just love. support and caring or else we wouldn't. have money we just be like making things. for each other all that I built a hut. feeling it it'd be dream catchers things. like this somebody sent me this neck. brace for somebody who's you know. because I always want to have a little.

bit of a longer neck I got a limit it. looks like my grandma's tampon well. she's been through some tough times yeah. yeah yeah she had a huge huge honor she. must have hit her yeah there's a unique. flow she had somebody had going Wow did. you still feel then even when you're. getting on stage that these people. aren't gonna like me because I came I. did it my way or I took my own path. really I mean around that time then like. then it was you know a hundred arenas in.

a row over many years so that was just. like all that like portion of my career. was just like the parade you know it was. it was just everyday waking up and. literally going who called today and. what do they want me to do and how can i. you know how can i play in the sandbox. for one more day of you know. entertainment it wasn't until you know. everything finally hit that upper upper. crest right around like 2010 and then as.

it started to come down the other side I. remember feeling like okay so I had my. moment and now I it's literally going. like like our act after a certain amount. of time its passe and we're a new comic. again and I was a new comic again I was. ready for the next chapter and I didn't. mind that it wasn't gonna be as. white-hot for a little bit did you have. a moment at the top at when he started. to come down the other side we were like. did you feel like you had friends did. you feel like you had people around you.

like ya used to feel like you still had. like comedians that were on your side or. yeah the point was it I mean I had the. guys that I you know Eddie Murphy came. to see good luck Chuck he came to. support my movie and I felt like maybe. not again my graduating class yeah very. tight very you made I made it with a lot. of guys you know fortunately like a lot. of guys in our group has had and. continue to have really wonderful. success and yet the guys that were in. front of me you know Richard Lewis and.

Jerry Lewis and you know dice and all. these people that I had wanted to. emulate made me feel like a man so okay. this part of it to write this is. actually the part of the career that. gets interesting because then all that I. was just talking to dice last night or. text him back and forth I said you know. this is the stuff that makes rolls like. when he was in blue jasmine or star was. born the vulnerability comes from these. years comes from the stuff that happens. on the in-between you know if I wanted. to go back and play Madison Square.

Garden I I know I can do it I know. exactly how to put myself right back in. that but where I'm at now and these. beautiful theatres and connecting with. people in a really unique way 29 years. in is is more I'm more enthusiastic. about that than thinking about what I. what I did you know ten years ago or. years ago you know now when you say that. you can when you say that like so you. just said like doing those roles and. being vulnerable was there was there a. moment like on the calm down part like.

on that you know when it because you can. only get so high ya know there's only so. many stay there perseus yes right. was there a moment on the comedown part. where it was like because it became like. people would say like like you it became. like yeah it wasn't just like oh what. where's Dane Cook been or that sort of. thing or what's going on with Dane Cook. it was like people kind of turned. against you well it was the exact.

opposite of how much of a spectacle it. was when I arrived it the pendulum. always swings exactly huh yeah so it was. like I'm not gonna be just called like. oh he's done it's gonna be like he never. was yeah he doesn't exist in the in in. the annals of stand-up comedy it's like. you know or the annals the annals or the. anals either either when trust me you. get [ __ ] a lot well there is a. necessity there is some fucked-up stuff.

in this industry where it's like if. you're not just like a joke writer and. you don't fit into this certain formula. that you know that a lot of people who. run the industry think is like this is. what's funny then you're not funny right. and I hate that [ __ ] yeah me because the. funniest guys are the people that make. people laugh the most that's what I. think and that's what the ruling always. should be and now it's gotten even worse. now it's like you have to be not funny. and politically correct right which has. just led to basically people just. reading thorough onstage codes because.

comedy is in one way so corporate you. know it's because it's a Philly it used. to be a dark thing in a basement where. everybody would go and sneak into and it. was like here's where you're gonna hear. the things that we're all thinking and. somebody needs to say it and now it's. it's sponsored and it's Viacom and it's. it's a business it's a whole different. thing. I'm a purist I'd like the idea of coming. into the club you know no phones you. know I like to Chapelle does nothing no. phone yeah the bags you know - Ian it's. good I love that man it's like this. should be a place where we can all come.

in and hang out and air some stuff out. doesn't mean that it's a place to go in. and be racist or be [ __ ] you know. well maybe you I mean look bro I'm not. racist unless you are you know what I'm. saying brother what do you got you save. that for later. um but wasn't it fun. used to be able to be a little bit. racist and even if you knew as a. communion as entertaining you were gonna. be able to get people of that race on. board if people still listen there is.

still is room for that the whole thing. is not everybody can do a joke that's so. beyond the the line of what decency not. everybody's gonna get away with that but. there are people out there because they. don't have malice in their heart and you. know they're not coming at it from a. place of being derogatory they're coming. at a place of being expressing something. we're all kind of feeling something. that's running through all of us I let. that's a great comedian you know yeah.

but I don't I don't that's [ __ ]. hogwash all this stuff about and I had. it so much growing up all the alt comics. you know for a period of time they I was. mainstream and then I'm moving around. I'm not David Cross and everybody had. something to say about it and then when. I would try to do something different of. course it was like an outrage who was he. to think he could do a dramatic role and. people smashes and you look with a. sweater in it what are you doing now. he's an alt comic it's every all joke as. a sweater and a beard yeah so I don't.

know man all that stuff comes at you and. you just go hey the only thing that. really matters is how you're being. received by that crowd I've said a. couple times recently people ask about. my career and the good or bad there's. only one thing that keeps you relevant. in comedy one word keeps you around and. if you're not that word we're not gonna. see in a little bit funny funny fills. rooms nobody's coming to go and I'm. gonna go see Dayne show again cuz it's. not funny and it wasn't funny but this.

time I want to see if it's still not. funny yeah nobody is doing that people. are gonna support you people are gonna. smash you I think that a gifted. performer can can move around. Carlin nanka every comic should be going. we're all Carlin political irreverent. physical voices sound effects. farting smart that's a comedian he's the. architect he's one of the architects.

prior same thing who are we to like put. each other in boxes. when it's really all about just getting. a message across using every facet of. what we are as people yeah you know wow. I got really like I felt myself get. really uh interesting man nah emotions. right no it's true let's take another. question that came in your Nicholas. school you know what's up fear what's up. Dane this is Sai from Minneapolis. Minnesota what is uh you guys have.

thoughts on you know that whole Robert. Kraft you know dark arts witchcraft. whatever you want to call it what him. doing that what do you guys think of. that anyway I love the podcast gang gang. gang man he's talked about that suck off. of it here before to the Chiefs game Oh. his name was sigh yeah was its I like s. AI or sigh like like a sad you this. parents named him after a she gave birth. and she went oh I thought he was gonna. be and it's named him sigh anyway thanks.

for the question side listen if you're. seventy seventy you want to get a little. rub and tug III think that should be. your prerogative. yeah the mistake he made is he shouldn't. gone to Florida should have gone to. Europe where they don't give a [ __ ] yeah. yeah in the Europe man you as part as an. appetizer dude you know that come with. the water but yeah look everybody's been. jerked off somewhere by somebody they. didn't know if they wanted them to or. not well I have I miss most my child. here probably German the first time ever.

you know first time it ever happened to. me into a stream like a little kind of. still water by our house and the fish. came up and ate it right in front of me. dude and I had these crazy dreams after. that for probably maybe four years so. your semen became chump oh dude you know. what I'm saying what if I thought there. was gonna be like what happens now is so. scared I was afraid to tell anybody like. what if like like fish Vaughn's came out. of the water right just a little fish. with your [ __ ] head on them yeah same.

little jokes he couldn't stop coming but. yeah so everybody goes through a tough. time I think yeah look Robert Kraft is a. champion if those ladies as long as they. weren't you know being held against. their will or. something and they want to you know. perform do that type of business I don't. see anything wrong with those women. doing that type of business if they need. if they're doing it to survive and they. want to do it yeah yeah yeah the whole. human trafficking element that's not.

we're talking about that's that's pretty. [ __ ] up [ __ ] yeah somebody's locked in. a yeah somebody's under the influence of. drugs to be kept in an alley or. something like that like if somebody. chooses like if Theo and I said hey you. know what for a buck you can suck our. [ __ ] you know that that should be like. we're grown men we can we should be able. to make that offer yeah I mean that's a. [ __ ] yeah I would say 99 cents because. that always it's more enticing like it. ended its a businessman a marketing. right yeah and I would probably raise it. to about 20 bucks you know it comes with.

a hoodie yeah it's a merge with you yeah. now we're going to Chris D'Elia cuz what. this doesn't make it easy so what he. doesn't do so yeah I saw a guy with it. doesn't make a dent hoodie on the other. day at the airport I love that man. and I was like wow it's very very cool I. saw a homeless guy wearing one of my. shirts that I always donate like extra. merch at the end of Tours and I have a. picture with this the grimy estamos dude. and he's wearing a Dane Cook sure and I. was like that's me that's my shirt and.

he was like look we took a picture. that's awesome what was the question. oh the Robert Kraft yeah yeah yeah look. I mean the guy's a champion you know and. sometimes you have to relax before the. big game right and sometimes you burned. yeah that's true and his wife I think is. 78 what do you bother that woman. you're gonna bother a 78 year old woman. she passed away like six years ago oh. she did yeah yeah then way [ __ ] up I. imagine you have him masturbating in a.

graveyard instead because that's the. alternative man masturbating in a. graveyard should be the name of your. book someday I don't know why I could. just see you on the cover and maybe have. some fish and a little cream that are. also like watching us on the edge of the. graveyard but still you got to think. about that if that's the alternative. then look man I say we started go a go. [ __ ] me campaign for [ __ ] Robert. Kraft all right and get him what do you. need [ __ ] me that's a great idea man you. are entrepreneurial man [ __ ] what I can.

I'm doing what I can man what else do we. have my god I feel hi Dean. my name is Alex Jin Lai I'm from Port. Perry Ontario and my question today is. pertaining to age in getting older I. recently just had a birthday at the. beginning of February and this was the. first year where I was dreading it and I. googled it and I saw that you guys. actually have birthday's coming up in.

there back to back if Google is correct. so I'm just curious as your thoughts or. as to your thoughts on getting older and. aging and if it's something you enjoy if. it excites you if it gives you anxiety. like it gave me anxiety this year um I'm. just curious as to what you think my. favorite part of that question was when. she said if Google was correct yeah that. spoke to me more than anything else a. lot as Google is is the actor I would.

keep edia yeah don't believe everything. you read on the Internet. yeah now I believe everything I read on. the internet but you're right I agree. with you both right um you got a. birthday coming up yeah March 19th 18th. really yeah fellow pisces merry z dude. very old are you gonna be I'm gonna be. 39 do you look great. really yeah I don't feel great really. not really yeah I know you're good my. blood off the internet I've had some.

work I had to get a good quality I had a. hair taken out of the back of here and. get into here oh okay. Oh looks great a lot of people do that. man that's really that's that's not. uncommon looks awesome yeah I've seen. other people that have and then I've. also now seen other comics ask me about. it right yeah why not right it's like if. that's that's available then hell yeah. would you ever do that would you ever do. anything you think I would do that yeah. I mean I you know for me it's like. getting older. I think it's we're lucky as men because. you know we can be distinguished and it. also adds to like okay this is I'm 46.

this is the roles that I want to play. now in the kind of parts that I you know. hope to you know you know inhibit it's. like or in habit is it's it's good age. actually helps I've never been concerned. about aging. but at the same time it's like yeah I. feel like if I used to have a huge acne. scar right here and I would go and I. would get filler I'd have him do some. collagen in it cuz it was like I hated. it I didn't like my face get I had a. breeze you know what I mean yeah so I.

was like and it took years to finally be. like [ __ ] it you know what I mean it's. part of me it's part of character so I'm. I'm in the I'm in I'm fully behind doing. whatever it is that you feel like you. need to do to to better health and. wellness. you know whenever that is somebody said. you got calf implants was a rumor that. went around did you ever hear that dude. I don't but look at these accounts bro. oh my god bro it looks like my friend. Ben look at that I'm like a Clydesdale. yeah I never had calf implants but I've.

always had huge cab in fact I'm holding. up all that stress a bit my mom I. remember years you know years and years. ago I said what was it like when you. gave birth to me she goes your calf. ripped the [ __ ] out of my [ __ ] dude you. probably had f1 come out person-one come. out after huh there's no way you were. breech dude nobody could have [ __ ]. handled that I actually I think it was. one of those things where she she she. want to do like a c-section.

yeah but they were like your cat either. way these things are gonna [ __ ] hurt. something's gonna get stressed take for. your ribs out lady you're gonna be the. next Marilyn Manson up people yeah. people ask me did you ever hear that did. that you guys have implants yeah man. I've heard a lot of crazy [ __ ] you know. people think [ __ ] everybody has like. that thing where they'll write you'd be. like hey the rumor going around that you. tweeze your eyebrows and you you get. them like whatever they call that you. know oh I would baby I mean yeah I mean. I guess at some point I would look into. some of that I laid it I got some long. ones.

yeah it's threading or yeah yeah what. what people don't realize is like when. you're 46 is the stuff you learn as you. get older the hair on the they call this. the crown part like starts to diminish. yeah so it's not that like I'm so it's. like I'm [ __ ] aging yeah I'm 46 hey. guess what someday [ __ ] I might not. have any I'd be like Whoopi Goldberg. yeah. right do you um yeah I guess AG I get a.

little bit scared I realized I need to. do like I want to get in shape before I. do a special now because I just want to. be able to move a little bit better on. stage and be at my most fluid sure so I. can you know like physically do things. better I noticed my body will do more. for me and will take me to new places. like sometimes I'll do something if I'm. in really feeling good then I'll do. something then we'll create some of my. brain or rings like oh you can do this. idea right. and so I'm learning that a little bit. new yoga that they help each other out. up try to do a lot of yoga. Yoga is great yeah keeps keeps you so. limber and you know cuz I've always been. very physical I don't throw my body.

around I'm not doing like [ __ ] drop. kicks in houma Pilates anymore on stage. and some of that insanity because it. would hurt but but just you know going. to the gym keeping yourself healthy man. that's yeah that's another tool to your. performance ya know if you can do that. some people go the other way game. [ __ ] 150 pounds and that's funny too. yeah you know greatest part about aging. is that as a comedian it's all funny. right it's all funny if you're if you. embrace it. yeah if you don't mind being like got. the little punch go and it's all it's.

all funny well I got that limited build. I'm built like a kind of stoke a wagon. and people and we've talked about this. before you know I don't have that really. I wish I had kind of wider shoulders. have limited neck range so I've always. you know had different things I wanted. to do I used to wear a neck brace at. night all the time try and get my neck. longer you know get longer yeah I try to. hold on get yourself yeah a little not. much I'm not trying to [ __ ] wait was. it like much I have to hold my [ __ ]. head up or I was gonna say you put it on.

and was there like a winch that would. turn and it was like no it would just. kind of you know it make you really be a. taut right you're more rigid I like to. get a little bit taught to let it know. that I'm in business that was kind of my. goal I noticed that about you kind of a. terminator thing that's that's happening. yeah why does have limited family comes. from you know people weren't really. looking around staying [ __ ] Santa. local they were just looking straight. ahead all the time yeah there's no. [ __ ] hindsight there's no before that.

I good man side sights yeah like that. zero peripheral vision and like past my. family my whole legacy was they were. looking into a. in glass ale for most of it and you know. just can't wait to get that in their. belly instead of [ __ ] looking out. let's take one more up do this is a. question for Dane I wanted to ask you. why you got kicked out of the Laugh. Factory in Los Angeles and Theo if you.

had any close calls to getting booted. out of the Laugh Factory I know as a big. comedian area for comedians in Los. Angeles gang gang yeah amen and I don't. know is that true do you get that's. where Google is you know Google gets it. wrong a lot because I don't know if. people realize this breaking news. anybody that posts anything on Google. that says they're their reporter so. these days yeah fine it's a place and it. stays up there and if a lot of people. click on it the algorithm goes that must.

be reality yeah you know he says on my. [ __ ] Wikipedia that my my father was. a potato farmer was he no never but if. people kept voting it up or you know I. think there was like a mob of people. that was like let's put some. misinformation in there yeah and they. valid live in vain Dane's life of the. some veggies laugh factory thing it's I. wish it was an exciting story it was not. all the hullabaloo of getting banned for. life and all that I known the owner for. 17 years we had a falling-out it.

literally was like it was what men do. kind of moment it was just like guys the. way guys sometimes fight and then our. relationship is actually enhanced by the. fact that we both allowed each other to. vent and [ __ ] you know have the. swagger two years went by talked to. Jamie. the owner gene Mossad him he's like I. love you buddy I'm like I love you too. I was there that Saturday night and you. know it was just two guys that after. many years of business together. successful business together had a.

difference of opinion yeah and our. philosophies man that's the thing that. people don't realize philosophies change. your Constitution is different from mine. what we're trying to do is find a place. that we're you know where we are both. being received and understood you know. for what we're trying to put into say. our career is that something a common. ground but away from that you know it's. our differences that that. or actually I think even more. interesting so yeah you know you're very. vastly different from me and good that. should be the way it is right yeah what.

are you uh what are you most excited. about with the upcoming tour I mean you. said that obviously you know like people. are coming out on the saying oh wow I. didn't think that I would have a new. experience with you right but I had that. yeah I think that well first of all what. feels entirely you know I haven't I. haven't people say like I was gonna come. back I never stopped I was still touring. but I just wasn't doing like a live. nation you know that put a name on it. shoot a special during it I hadn't had. one of those years since troublemaker. which was four years ago.

and so being out there now the thing. that's the most that I'm most enthused. about the show is an amazing show the. show is one of the best shows that I. feel like I've put together in terms of. you know what the the bullet points I. want to hit his comedy but I'm so. present Theo you know it took a long. time to not be a person who was. encumbered by the past and the things. about my youth that made me feel so.

maligned and outside and different you. know and bad about myself yeah we talk a. lot about that stuff yeah I did that a. lot of years man you know even in with. success looking back why do people hate. me why did it why did that this. situation happened to me and then there. were years where it was like all I'm. doing is looking ahead I'm not even. enjoying the now the here and now what. do I got to do next why because the. expectations when you make it in this. business is like now you're paying my. mortgage kid so get out there and. [ __ ] do more of whatever it is that. you're doing you feel that. responsibility you know I had a company.

with 25 people working for me I want to. make sure everybody is winning that's a. lot that's a lot more than just being a. joke slinger yeah so it's different when. it starts to become a business is play. difference yeah and then finally it you. know it's settled into about ten years. ago at being you know something where I. felt very present but this tour in. particular because of the content you. know it's really about the content. because now I can celebrate all of it I. talked about some pretty dark moments in. my life I think in the funniest way.

possible I talked about some of the. high-water marks in a way that's. self-effacing take the piss out of. myself. yeah I can [ __ ] with my success and I. can tell you why that wasn't a failure. yeah and I can do that in a funny way. yeah tell it like it is tor you know and. that's the name of the tour tel like it. is because that's that's what I'm doing. yeah do you feel um. what do you think is helping you get. more introspective over the time therapy. you know did some great therapy EMDR.

anything like that mmm no I just did. like you know guilt one on one yeah yeah. after my parents died I didn't know how. to grieve I didn't know what that was I. ignored it I just did more shows and. just like kept truckin I was just like. Forrest Gump when he just ran for two. [ __ ] years yeah I just didn't stop. and then one day I was really sad and I. was like I was uh I was I remember I was. like real broken and it just hit me it. was almost just like the flu the way it. just it like entered my body and I was.

like I miss my parents. mm-hmm I lost him too soon they're not. here I couldn't call him anymore to be. like what do I deal with you know all. this backlash or all this adulation I. couldn't call him anymore right and that. really hurt me deeply. yeah that's heartbreaking yeah well it. really was and I lost my brother you. know essentially my brother died because. of all that you know you know all that. craziness so it was like I went through. this period of my life where I needed. help I need somebody help me connect the. dots so I actually found a therapist who.

was an agent many years ago he got it he. understood the business he's not that. not the comedy guy right I didn't go. back to him yeah. what about did what did you feel like. you had like out of time on your career. got so busy that did you feel like did. like disappointing yourself that you. hadn't spent more time with your family. there in that well I still had an. amazing connection with my mom and even. if I couldn't you know physically be. with her out we talked all the time.

right. you know and she came to a lot of shows. if I had seven shows in New England she. was at all seven alone drinking Kahlua. sombreros man and [ __ ] heckling me. I'm honest too heckled me from the back. of the room literally yell things out. like talk about the night you walked in. what. I was having sex with your father and. then another person would go hey shut up. and then I'd go no you shut the [ __ ] up. that's my mom she can say whatever she. wants it was like an act of this this.

whole thing so that was that was brutal. but the the gift of therapy you know. some people think like ah no it's it's. hooey it's hokey it's it is not as a. person who sat in that seat week after. week after week or on the phone if I was. on the road to be able to purge yourself. of some of those negative thoughts yeah. mmm man it was a life changer oh yeah I. got there every day at 5:00 I'll go with. you and I'm excited like oh we've heard.

a lot about you in here like oh this. really is runs place-to-place you I. won't say a word but everyone so all you. just hear me go like this mm-hmm yep did. um and had a question for you were just. talking about your mom you're talking. about therapy yeah just getting getting. present you know being in the moment. being being you know in that on stage. and off yeah you know where it didn't.

who I was off stage who didn't matter it. who I was on stage didn't dictate my. importance in life offstage and my. insignificance in life didn't I didn't. take that onstage to impede on my act. mhm a healthy balance of both you know. it takes a while yeah. takes it takes it takes a good long it's. you were on this road for a long time. man and look at Garry Shandling you know. that that documentary was so funny yeah. I need to watch it should watch it man.

yeah wait watch the other one you talked. about the documentary not interrupt you. I don't wanna forget you talked about. the documentary about the dude that saw. the UFOs mm-hmm yeah it's on Netflix. right now no iTunes so I on iTunes UFOs. and I got to get the exact name of it. but blew my mind. what greatest documentary about UFOs. that I've ever seen all that stuff yeah. and this like I already believed it and. now I super believe it that's even a.

turn. you there yeah you really he seemed like. a reliable source this man yeah cuz the. documentary isn't that's it. wait no is that it nope no no this guy's. name is I think it had his name in it. yeah it did it was it's on iTunes it's. like the number one documentary right. now the aliens arrived UFO TV that's. right see all these other things are. kind of like both the narrator's like. this they were tall and they had eyes.

that were like onyx stones and you're. like oh this is this is about Egypt oak. just hokey no this is like a real guy. who did all the research talk to the. right people and Mullins or something. was his name I can't remember you're so. [ __ ] amped about it when I saw you to. come be still I was like I skipped lunch. that is me hot Ram. I can't memory sorry no it's alright. they'll find him let's play one more. question and then we'll wrap it up hey.

Theo hey Jane I have a question for both. of you when was the moment that you two. found out about each other and then also. maybe the moment that you two met I want. to hear your first stories and first. impressions thanks King gang hey real. quick before we answer that we never you. never got to respond to I told you no. SNL what about you and your comedy. career at this point what's been a.

moment that was will impact you for the. rest of your life somewhere you felt you. turned a corner okay let's just take. this you know I don't know actually. that's a good question I I think for me. it had a lot to do with starting to get. accepted by other comedians and it. wasn't something that happened on stage. it was probably more stuff that happened. like offstage and what do you think. ingratiated you with people what was it. about you that you felt like you were. connecting in terms of like was it just.

conversations you were having with. comics or were you spending time like. bowling with them like what was I think. it was just doing comedy you know and uh. earning their respect is a consistent. performer yeah yeah because I'd ever. always. didn't like it when guys like there's a. lot of guys who seem like they were glad. hand and like leeching on people and. stuff and that was never my way I never. I in fact I wanted to I would not. communicate with comedians that were. doing well because I didn't want to be. that person and because I felt like I. couldn't hide the fact that that's what.

I was trying to do if I was trying to do. it so I just kind of naturally would. meet people you know actually start. getting into some podcast and really. helped like getting on the fighter and. the kid and being able to be a guest on. their podcast for me made me feel like. oh well I get to you know joke around. with these in these fun groups right and. then one night Rogan texted me or sent. me a DM in his podcast is you know. probably the biggest one and yeah and he. just said hey man I'd love to have you. on the podcast and I remember that night.

just feeling like [ __ ] man this is crazy. dude we're doing write him back to. writing back now I'm like texting like. my friends what it was like say thanks. and then say something or they might not. say something it did you say thanks dude. got jerked off bro and I was like I'm. waiting it's in the morning of course. into it into a creek yeah I know you man. I know your style defeat of that's a. huge moment you know that because you. know what that is that's that's but I. felt accepted the community saying you.

know you're and I had moments like that. very early in Boston where I finally. felt like oh they know that I'm really. here to work I'm you know I love this. the art of stand-up comedy I'm a student. of it you know it takes a long time for. your peers to because we're all a little. suspicious well yeah you know who's the. who's the new guy or girl coming in. especially if they come from any other. background a little weird about it. yeah and that's nature something that's. just nature the person of a different. background you think that oh how could. they be funny they're not from the same. ilk. like what time David Arquette came in.

and was like I'm a stand-up now and he. was doing all these spots of the factory. and we're all like watching going like. yeah we love scream man but what the. [ __ ] are you doing you know that's a. spot that somebody who really wants to. do this cover you know so what if did. you ever have did you was in my. impression just I can answer yeah. quickly I heard about the offer. you know quite some time yeah I think I. saw you one night performing at one of. the clubs and I remember feeling like oh. this guy really I've heard. a lot of bottom and I remember thinking.

to myself oh this guy he gets it he. really gets it like I cuz I'm always see. the the gears turning with calm I can. watch and I you know I kind of like. we're a little bit soothsayer because we. know that I see what he's trying to get. to her what he's trying to and instill I. had that preconceived notion until we. finally actually chatted for a little. bit in a couple of clubs and then really. got to know each other at my house to. where I could go okay this is a. well-rounded guy who's trying to you. know figure it all out and then put it. all back into his comedy so that's I.

think we started off a friendship I'm no. Rogan yeah don't text me in the middle. of the night you know he's never texting. and saying what do I say to Dane it's. lighter but that's okay that's okay. I think yet for me I would see you at. the clubs and like I always got it I. always feel like too nervous to talk to. some guys or I feel nervous around I'm. just insecurities about myself to even. just be myself so you know I probably. felt like that sometimes you were. friends with other guys that I knew. pretty well and and so you know we.

bumped into each other we would talk a. little bit at the improv here and there. had a couple of conversations and then. and but that was it but the first time I. saw you that dublin's actually I mean. years ago where the first night I ever. came out watch comedy in LA oh wow. that's a great question it there yeah. and it was cool it was that was a whole. that was where everything was starting. to change me yeah that's where I was. really like oh man okay that was a world. that was a place in its own yeah yeah. yeah that when people still talk about. that yeah but Bluma Dublin's man yeah. dude that was crazy right great memories.

um was there ever a chance since you're. from Boston and Wahlberg is from Boston. that there was a chance for you and Mark. Wahlberg to do a movie um no I've never. I mean I've met him several times the. closest I ever came to ever performing. those he was in the New Kids on the. Block back when I was starting stand-up. in a comedy group and we did shows. together Wow. so we would open for new kids on the. block at like sober clubs yeah who play. sober closer you're too young so we play. you know these non alcohol then use and.

so Joey McIntyre was like [ __ ] 11 or. whatever he was and probably [ __ ] I got. to know [ __ ] man chicks were lining. up for those guys I was lining up in a. wig we just wanted. we just wanted to uh you know whatever. whatever fell off the side of the stage. for them we were like you know hoping. that maybe one girl would would like us. and want to touch her peen what did you. ever you ever offended that they didn't. reach out to you cuz you get both from. the same place no I mean I'd the first. film I ever did was in a movie with Ben. Affleck and Matt Damon it was called.

school ties I didn't have a significant. role in it but those guys were like I. knew I knew in an armed Boston they were. emerging you know I didn't hear in that. me neither. I mean I mean it literally for like that. much dude Kurt Fox's in the patriot did. you know that yeah yeah I see he's in. one of my favorite movies wider he's in. Wyatt Earp a lot he's really great in. he's really great man but no I never. felt I've worked with many Boston guys. that you know I I've admired and come up.

like him so if they called you go great. and if not then you know it's okay I'm. still a Fame yeah yeah cool stuff man. anything else guys are you shooting a. special I'm gonna film a couple of. things this year I think that I got two. two specials that I want to do and if I. can do it back-to-back then I'm gonna do. that but I don't want to give up where. I'm gonna do it yet I'm talking to. directors now and it's getting exciting. and I'm planning on doing one and doing.

it myself with a with as a director and. maybe even doing it at the main room at. the comedy store because I feel so. comfortable there of course do you think. it matters like venue size and that sort. of thing I mean for me some of it seems. of it to be about comfort like the last. one I did was in a place it was in a. theater and it was okay but it wasn't. really that comfortable I'd never even. been on the stage right so it didn't. feel I was very nervous yeah but uh yeah. I know I don't think it matters. whatsoever I mean honestly I feel like. comedy is as long as it's you know got.

great sound you know even more than. lights or anything as long as it sounds. great you know if you're at a place that. you're comfortable hometown of course. that's a legendary room in an amazing. room just a room that embraces comedy so. I think that's a smart moving your part. playing it there but I don't I don't. think that you know it's not like saying. hey because you played a five thousand. cedar that that. you should have more of a validation or. less it's like know if you're funny that.

should be wherever that you want to do. that is gonna work out. funny wins funny wins tell it how like. it is don't like it is tell it like it. is you're yeah we're out there man did. I'm gonna med for it actually in two. weeks are you serious yeah oh [ __ ] I'm. so excited I'm nervous or bought you. know Boston I'm just yeah I'm excited. and nervous right next to my my town. that I grew up in really yeah yeah born. and raised in Arlington Massachusetts. and used to hang out at the Medford Mall. really yeah look for chicks they were. coming out of [ __ ] parade of shoes.

yes they're on a bench eating Brigham's. ice cream going like girls they wouldn't. look at me for another 10 years but you. already know we used to camp out at the. mall we should drop to Slidell Louisiana. and we'd go stay at the mall you had a. tent camp out outside and go to the mall. again the next day. was you have a store that was like your. spot that you always had to go like I. got to go to the sharper image or oh. yeah yeah we went to the place that have. like panties but also have like lava. lamps what is a oh yeah yeah we steal a.

bunch of stuff and then get arrested. even sometimes it arrest you then let go. and they good end alike Electronics. Boutique yeah and look at what the new. [ __ ] Nintendo 64 games just imagine. everybody cared about you to have one. was [ __ ] good to us. Dane Cook best to look on your new tour. man it's the oh thanks for having me man. yeah really I was excited for this so. would you ever do a podcast of your own. you think have you considered it or does. that seem like something that everybody. else is doing so you're going the other. direction of this I love being a guest.

and coming in and having come up and. created my own early version of app I. wasn't even called a podcast I had. something called the voice of doom and. the voice of doom was a little jukebox. that I would upload mp3 and I would do. like a rant every couple days I just put. on like some stuff that I knew wouldn't. be funny as much on stage but like I. could kind of riff on yeah and I felt. like for me I I I'm enjoying watching so. many people embrace the entrepreneurial.

side of getting their voice out there. way more than even if I was doing it at. this point because I'm like I did that. was not cool when it was not in vogue. and you're a big lot of [ __ ] and now. it's the template right now it's a must. the calling card so I'm just I'm. grateful that you know I could come in. here and hang out hopefully you'll have. me back yeah we'd love to you man thanks. for coming in Coleman. [Music].

little town for me to sell that parking. brake and let myself.

[Music].