Cristina Mariani | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #668

Just a reminder that Bus Boys the Movie. is available to stream at home on Apple. TV, Prime Video, YouTube. You can see. all the options uh at busboysmov.com. Uh make sure to go ahead and check that. out. We've also got some DVDs available. if you're into that. Uh and thank you uh. to anyone and everyone uh who helped. support uh our movie. Amen. Today's guest is a stand-up comedian out. of Austin, Texas. Uh you may know her.

from Kill Tony and from her tour. currently in America and in a Europe as. well next year. Uh, I had a great time. getting to know the hilarious Miss. Christina Mariani. >> and I will [music]. find a song.

[music]. >> Thank you for coming and thanks for. adjusting your time or whatever was. going on in your life. >> Thanks for having me. Um, you know, for. a second I thought you meant you were. going to do my podcast and then I was. like, why would he? He didn't know about. that. I click later. That's why I asked. if you could do it in the evening. >> Oh, [laughter] really? >> Yeah. >> I'm glad that you would would think. about me being on there. I don't know. what hat to wear here. >> What do you think, Christina? What do. you think if you had to pick a hat for a. guy that's sitting in here? >> Um,

>> that's one. >> Okay. Uh, >> I think I like that one more. >> You like this one more? >> Yeah. You look tan. >> Uh, what you say? I look handsome. >> The tan. >> Oh, okay. >> Yeah. Like you've been in the sun. >> Oh, I thought you mean like I I honestly. I thought it gave me a little streak. I. was like you look closer to being like a. BG black guy. >> Oh, no. Not with a mullet. >> That's true. >> Never see a black guy with a mullet. >> But you know what? You know, you know.

what's I think is something that should. come back is the Jerry curly. >> That's what he was saying. >> You and Zach were just mentioning that. >> Well, she was talking about mullets and. I said she was like if he was That's a. long story. We're talking if he were. black and he had a mullet. I said I. think that's a Jerry curl. >> Oh, that's what a Jerry curl is. I. didn't know. >> Oh, that's a Jerry curl, baby. >> Okay. >> Sorry. And it's hard to call you baby, too. Also, that's insane. And that's. very unprofessional and it's not cool. >> I felt like you were being a narrator. Not you, Theo. Just the narrator of the. >> Thank you. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. I wasn't trying to be offensive to. you or like.

>> you you said I was aloof. That was. worse. >> Okay. That was [laughter] before we were. rolling. I don't. >> Yeah. Yeah. But now everyone knows if. I'm being weird, it's cuz you called me. aloof and now I'm in my head about it. [laughter]. >> Okay. >> Um Oh, sorry. >> Uh your hair looks nice. How about that? Can I say that? >> Yes. >> You're very funny, too. Let me say that. first. >> Okay, cool. >> Yeah. And your hair looks really nice. It looks different than the last time I. saw it. >> Yeah, I got banged. Um just yeah I just. wanted to try it. >> And how does Yeah. How does a bang.

choice come on? I know that's. >> how um you know every once in a while. something happens during the month for. girls and you just get more testosterone. and then you start making decisions. >> Oh really? >> Yeah. I feel like that's when I make all. my important decisions is around my. period. >> You mean something ovular? Oh, it just. like cuz you get way more testosterone. in your body when you're about to That's. why we get so angry because we're closer. to you guys. Um when we're about to get. our periods, we're the closest to guys. So then.

>> is that is that is that really what. happens? >> I'm pretty sure. I don't want to like We. can fact check it. >> No, bring it up. But so so you get more. testosterone right out of there because. why is it because you have to hatch an. egg kind of deal or like is is does the. body need more power or need more That's. not a good way to say it. Somebody's. going to get upset no matter what I say. here. about uh power. >> or just like you know what is the what. do they need more testosterone for? Do. you feel like. >> um I don't know. I have no idea. I feel. like it was just your body punishing you.

for not having a baby. That's what a. period is. That's what the It's like now. you get to be a man for a week. But then. if you. >> And what branch of Christianity says. that? >> I don't know. I. I don't know. Are you religious? You're. a little religious. Yeah. >> I believe in God, you know, right? And I. uh Yeah. And I like Jesus, dude. So. that's where I'm at. But no. Yeah. Yeah. I have faith for sure. >> Yeah. That's cool. >> And you're part you're part-time. religious. Are you. >> I uh grew up really religious. I grew up.

really Catholic. So but then you know in. high school I was like I don't know. I. don't know if I believe in this. And. then now I'm like kind of into crystals. and stuff. >> Oh yeah. >> And like but I I'm spiritual I guess. >> But you can't spell crystal without. >> cre like me. Oh no. >> Christ. >> Christ. Yeah. Okay. I was thinking also. Christ. Christina is close. >> Wow. So you Yeah. No matter what. >> I was thinking about myself. >> Yeah. [laughter]. Um what was I even asking about? Oh, no.

But tell me more about the um the ovular. like the energy the ovular energy. >> Oh, okay. Um. >> and how it led to the bangs kind of. >> Oh, okay. Well, I think I just um you. know, I was. I think I always have these um things in. subcon like in the back of my mind, these things that bug me, but I'm able. to ignore it for most of the month. And. then when I'm about to get my period, they all kind of come to light and they. really aggravate me, you know, and then. I'd get like more insecure and stuff and. then I just, you know, I'm like, you. know what, I will get bangs. Why not?

Because you get that testosterone and. that confidence to just go for things, you know? >> Okay. So, some of it feels like a. confidence that comes in. >> kind of like when you're angry, I feel. like you don't you don't have time to. overthink things if you're feeling angry. about something. That's what's nice. about feeling angry sometimes is that. you're not overthinking. >> That's a great point actually. Anger. usually kind of leads to some sort of. action. >> Yes. And not always good. Most of the. time not good. >> Yeah. [laughter]. >> But you're not overthinking when you're. doing it, you know.

>> Yeah, that's true. Like, oh, look at. these definitive people who are making a. bad choice. Yeah, exactly. I don't get. really that angry, though. >> Yeah. Well, I think they look nice. I. think they look great. Or those are. bangs, huh? >> Thank you. I like yours, too. >> Oh, thanks. >> Yeah, I feel like we're kind of. matching. >> Yeah, we're kind of the same. >> Yeah, >> we're like two different versions of. Britney kind of. >> Yeah, it's Britney, [ __ ]. >> Yeah. And I'm t Well, every girl always. wants to be toxic Britney. I'm okay. I'm. with being I'm okay with being dancing. in the foyer with the knife Britney or.

whatever. Like the one of the newer. ones. >> Okay. Like. >> like the second like the New Testament, >> a new generation Britney. >> Yeah. I'm. >> Oh, this this is you. >> I'm this one. Yeah, I'm Halloween. Britney. >> I bet she got those bangs, too. It was a. period decision. >> I'm Michael Myers Brittney. This is Michael Jackson Myers Britney. right here. This [ __ ] is legit. And you. think those dogs, how do they feel? Take. me through this, Christina. >> How do I think the three dogs staring at. her feel? I don't Do you think those are. employees? The dogs are they emotional.

support dogs, do you think? Or. recreational ones? >> I'm not sure. One of them had cornrows, I think, along its back. >> I don't know. I always feel like. emotional support dogs look sad. >> Oh, >> you know, they're just like, imagine. your friend is just like always making. bad decisions and you can't say. anything, but you have to stare at them. like, >> "Yeah, >> come on, stop doing that. Don't [ __ ]. your ex again.". >> Yeah, dude. I never thought about that.

And like, yeah, you don't do anything in. the emotional support. You just feed. them. It's like, oh, they're like, you're [ __ ] your life up, you know, like you're doing heroin over and I'm. just laying over here with this vest on, you know, and people think I was in like. the military or whatever. And then. they're like, uh, you want me to forget. about it, so you'll just feed me. >> Yeah. And and dogs are good at that, at. forgetting about things if you feed. them. >> That's a good point. Huh. >> I feel like cats would keep you more. accountable, and that's why people don't. like them as much. A cat would be judgy. Every time you do something wrong, it. would like go away and show you its.

butthole and then you'd be like, "I. [ __ ] up and the cat wouldn't." Like, >> you know, >> that is quite a move. What ethnicity. move is that to walk off about 11 ft. away, show you their [ __ ]. >> Mhm. >> And then just wander over behind a. curtain. >> What ethnicity? >> Yeah. I like to I like to relate things. to ethnicities, like behaviors to to. different ethnicities. >> Okay. So, what ethnicity would like walk. away, show you their butthole, and hide. behind a curtain? I'm thinking I'm going. to get a little flag for this, but I'm.

going to go. I'm going to go Vietnamese. Gay. Vietnamese. Probably. >> gay Vietnamese. I don't think they would. hide behind a curtain. >> Oh, you think it would just kind. >> I think they would be proud. >> Mill around. Maybe pass a hat around. >> Yeah. Yeah. They would shave their. butthole and then freeze. Freeze frame. I bet you're wondering how I got here. [laughter]. And that's how I met your mother. [laughter]. Christina Mariani, is that how you say.

your last name? Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. I'm good. >> Uh, thanks for hanging out today. >> No problem. Theodore, is that your full. name? Theodore. >> Uh, the adorable, my grandmother said, but she was a. >> [ __ ]. >> Okay. Yeah, I [laughter] was going to. say uh she was. >> No, no, I'm sorry. I don't know. >> No, I was going to say she was uh just. like kind of a brave woman who did a lot. in her community, but yeah, we'll go. with that version of it. >> Horrible. [laughter]. She was a different type of lady. Um, yeah. Theodore. That's my name right. there. >> I like it. It's like Alvin and the.

Chipmunks. >> Yeah. >> So, you'd be the fat one. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, dude. Yeah. I. think I feel kind of like I don't know. I don't think you can say I think I feel. fat because people that are thicker. would be like upset. Like, you can't. take the feeling of being fat, but not. the the smorgusborg of it or whatever. >> You could be like, I feel full. >> That's it, >> right? >> I feel like a full male. I feel like. I've been full for a few years. >> Well, no. That seems gay. I feel like. >> Yeah, [laughter] I guess. So, it's the. Mi guy, too.

>> Yeah. Like you haven't eaten anything in. a couple days. You're like, I'm full. >> Some dude saying that is definitely. been being gay. Um, >> have you ever been gay? >> Have I ever been gay? >> Yeah. Just like for fun. >> No. No. I remember one time some guy was. like. he was saying he was like a soothsayer. or whatever. >> What's that? A soothsayer. >> Soothsayer. Bring up an image of one. Let me get a JPEG of a soothsayer. >> That kind of sounds like a.

>> like that. >> That doesn't look soothing at all. >> Well, all of these are options, right? The man talking to the horse. The other Britney, Susay or Britney. right there. >> That's your grandpa. The man talking to. the horse. >> But it was like it was just like some. guy and he's like he apparently there. was a guy in our town who could read. your ribs by rubbing his fingers on. them. he could read them. >> like it was almost like reading on a. crystal ball or something. >> Okay. >> And so he was like a rib reader, right? Like a mystic. >> Okay. >> And so I remember they would take us. there like during the carnival or. whatever the fair. They would take us. there.

>> and this guy would just kind of like, >> you know, he would kind of. >> like read like the, you know, that's. just your body braille right there, your. ribs. And he would kind of feel it like. that and then give you a message. >> Okay. >> You like a message of hope or like a. message of uh um concern. >> Okay. I feel like the ribs is a funny. thing to pick because you could only. feel um skinny people's ribs and so that. was a way to like filter out who he. would touch. >> I think he think.

>> the soothsayer was like I'm not touching. fatties, [laughter]. >> right? Like. >> but I don't know. I think look Britney I. think money doesn't have I don't know if. money cares about how like which you. know like but maybe yeah he maybe he. maybe he had a type he had like a very. like a starving type but yeah I guess. it's like yeah let me just. >> picture an obese person you know and you. go to like look for the ribs and you. really got to like. >> oh I would love that.

>> get in there. >> it's like an Easter egg hunt kind of. >> yeah I think I would dig that um You are. from just so audience can learn about. you cuz you you and I toured together. some. >> Yeah. >> Yep. >> And you're on tour right now. >> Yes, I am. >> Mhm. Yep. >> Where you have coming up just so we. know. >> Um I man just [ __ ] I should have looked. that up, right? Right. >> Okay. >> Skyline Appleton, Wisconsin. I love. Wisconsin. Chicago at Zanies. That's. great. Congrats, dude. The comedy store.

La Hoya. >> Oh, yeah. That's the first time me doing. that. I'm excited. That's the best. >> Okay, cool. >> That's where Mitch McConnell lives, somebody said, I think. >> Okay, >> that's what anyway. Or lives is a unique. term to use with Mitch McConnell. But um. didn't he just fall asleep the other. day? Did you see that? >> He was found unconscious. >> Why? >> He's a senator. Oh, >> okay. >> So, he's just up to those like It's like. those sleeping senator tricks, you know, like those what's those animals that. play dead or whatever? >> Possums.

>> Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. Oh, so he's just being a possum. >> Yeah. Yeah, he's just the oasum of the. uh what is it? Senator Mitch McConnell. was found unconscious at his Washington. DC home on June 14th, 2026 and. reportedly received CPR for a suspected. cardiac arrest. Sure. Probably trying to. get insurance money. While his office. confirmed he was hospitalized, they have. provided few details on his current. condition. >> I don't know. I kind of believe that he. had a cardiac arrest. >> You do? >> I think that's Yeah. Well, he's the guy.

that they keep like pressing the button. like they keep shutting him down. A lot. of people think that he's controlled, right? And so he's the guy that they. keep pressing the button on him and. shutting, you know, he's the guy that. kind of shorts out. >> Oh, so he's a robot. You think. >> people have said that he is? He's more. of like Yeah, he's kind of a Yeah, >> that would be great to make all robots. old. So that's the excuse for them. glitching out. Oh, they're just old. >> Oh, you got a 1996? Yes. What do you. What do you expect? You know, >> maybe Michael J. Fox is also a robot. You think. >> he's just like glitching?

>> I think he's definitely uh he's testing. the matrix. How is Michael J. Fox what's. his health condition right now? Cuz I. know he's made a he's What does he have? MS, right? >> Oh, he's got Parkinson's, dude. >> Oh, I feel bad making a joke. >> Oh, no. It's okay. I mean, he he's a. comedic actor. I'm sure he's okay with. joking around. U Michael J. Fox in the. advanced stages of Parkinson's disease. and also this is what you get for. traveling through time. >> Uh is in the advanced stages of.

Parkinson's disease which he was. diagnosed with in 1991. While he deals. with severe symptoms and mobility. challenges, he remains mentally sharp. and active making high-profile. appearances like his surprise attendance. at the 2026 SAG Awards. Um, dude, it. would be interesting to talk to someone. that has that, just to learn about what. it's like, you know, just to learn about. Parkinson's and like just I always. wonder what it's like to have certain. like a certain ailment or a thing that's. going on with your body or mind, but. while you're like, can you still.

experience it? Like, does it feel like. you're in like a Halloween costume? Like. you know when you're in a Halloween. costume, you put it on in the mask and. you're still looking out of it like it's. you inside but outside people think. you're like a ghost or like a a like a. wookie or whatever you know. >> You mean like if you're self-aware about. how you're coming off to other people? >> Yeah. Like does it feel like you're like. just trapped inside of something that's. having a problem or does it feel like. you are having the problem? I guess. that's what I mean. >> I mean um. >> and sorry there's bugs in here.

>> Oh, it's okay. >> This place is not bugging me. >> It's just has a lot of bugs. It's not. No, it's fine. Okay. Sorry. >> No, no, it's all. >> I'm sorry. I'm taking on anger for. somebody else. You're fine with it. That's fine. You're from Stockton. >> It's okay. You're a guy. You always have. anger. >> That's true. And you get it every once. in a while. >> Every once in a while. And that's when I. get stuff done. [laughter]. >> I wait. I write down the things that, okay, I'll do that when I'm about to get. my period cuz I'm about to get angry. >> That's a good idea. Like a period to-do. list. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So then I'm like, I'll. get to this. I know when I'm going to So. that way I remember. It's like, all. right, time to, you know, um, yell at my.

mom today. [laughter]. No, I wouldn't. I love my mom. >> Well, who knows if you do, but time to. like dig up that body or time to like, you know, go look for treasure. Time to. do something. >> that's productive. Yeah. Yeah. >> Yes. Put those 2x4s up. >> Yeah. Yeah. Cuz then if not, I'm just. sitting with all that anger. I need to. use that energy. Um. >> which is why do you work out? >> I like that. Yeah. I like to work out. >> Yeah. Cuz of all the anger. >> Yeah. >> You got to let it out somehow. >> It does kind of It makes me just I don't. know. It makes me here's what it does.

for me is I realize I need to let myself. know that I'm in control of myself, right? >> Because if not, I'll be more at the. whims of just like what my what my. thoughts are. So going to the gym, making myself go puts me a little bit. more in control of myself. Like it gives. me a little bit more hope that like, okay, somebody's got my back and it's. me. >> Okay. Yeah, that makes sense. >> A little bit of that. Does it make. sense? >> It it completely makes sense. >> I appreciate that. If you complete. tasks, if you do things you tell. yourself you're going to do, that builds. your confidence and then you trust.

yourself because you're like, "I'm not a. liar. I said I was going to do it and I. did it.". >> You hate yourself when you're lying. Yeah. >> To yourself. Yeah. >> Oh, dude. Yeah. I And that's I've spent. I got to the point where I didn't even. believe myself anymore. I wouldn't even. listen to myself. I realize I would know. I was saying something like I'm never. that's not going to h you know, like you. start to lose like integrity with. yourself. It gets kind of like. >> I don't know. It can get it can you can. get in like kind of a rough spot. >> Yeah. Because then you don't like. yourself. I mean, think about somebody. in your life that you know is a.

compulsive liar. You don't respect them. You don't want to be around them. It. makes you feel bad. And then that thing. is inside your head. It's you. Then. you're like, I you can't escape. Kind of. like Britney's dogs, you know, and then. that's you in your head. You're just. like, [laughter]. >> you know, >> somebody cornrow my back. >> Like enough. Just that's why I never say. uh. >> one of the dogs had lipstick on too. That's the part that shook me a little. >> He was just he was like I need to feel. better somehow. I need to [laughter]. like do I look pretty?

>> And he was a man too. I think he was a. Vietnamese dog. >> That one. >> Yeah. And this is a new advertisement. for Hollywood. Uh this is insane. [laughter]. Yeah. >> Hollywood the musical. >> Hollywood the musical. [laughter] Dude, that's exactly what this is. You know, there's some things you couldn't make. musicals. It would be inappropriate, right? You can make movies about. everything, but you can't make musicals. about everything. >> I don't know if that's true. I've been. thinking one thing we do need more of is. like Wiggers the Musical.

>> Okay. But see, that's funny. That's. funny. You could do that. That's What. about 911 the musical? >> What would you call it, though? >> 911 the musical. >> Yeah. >> I don't know. That doesn't seem. appropriate. It seems like. >> No. Well, I think you Yeah, you need a. softer pitch. the the title of the mu. the title of it. I think it's an. interesting idea and I think if you had. fundraising in it then it would be I. could see it but 911 the musical. >> No fundraising.

>> Who would be in it? You need like kind. of like a gay hero that survives the. rubble. >> A gay hero that survives the. >> Well, you have to have somebody that. first of all likes being in a musical. >> Okay. Right. So that's why you said gay. >> I'm just I'm not saying it has to be. Would you not be in a musical? You don't. think? >> I don't know. I'd be in I'd be in it for. 10 minutes. >> Can you sing? >> I can sing. All right. I'm pretty good. I'm not that great. Uh I'm I'm getting. better. I'm actually not that good. >> Well, can you sing something?

>> No. >> Really? >> Yeah. I'm not singing also. And it's. Yeah. I don't sing during the daytime. also. >> Oh, okay. It's a nighttime activity. >> Yeah. You know, >> like being gay. >> Yeah. Yeah. Being [laughter] gay is a. >> It's for the night time. >> For some people, I think it's night. time. I was just talking to my friend. earlier about having a hot air like they. had this guy in our town and he would. meet a friend. They both were hot air. balloon enthusiasts and they would go up. in the sky and that's where they would. hang out and just like I think they had. a gay. a gay energy and they would take it up.

there because there was just so much. embarrassment here at uh sea level. >> Okay. So you're saying two gay guys went. in separate hot air balloons and then. they. >> Yeah. >> And that's but they're in separate hot. air balloons, >> but they met up. Oh, so they did it so. people on the ground thought they. weren't gay. They went their separate. >> ways and then they. >> But people knew they're like there's no. what are they doing up like you know. what I'm saying? People started started. to kind of put two and two together. >> It's like up but also their penis is up.

[laughter]. >> Yeah. >> It's a new Disney movie. >> I [laughter] guess it is. Um Christina. Mariani, good to see you today. Um can. you tell me again about so did you can. you bring that up about um if a woman is. going through ovulation do they have is. there more testosterone in the. bloodstream that. >> I think it's like around their period. not ovulation. >> okay. >> yes. >> yes on average women's testosterone. rises around the time of ovulation. >> I guess it is ovulation. >> and then stays somewhat higher through.

the lutil phase. >> okay yeah that's when you get your. period and stuff. >> okay but it is not highest during the. actual period. huh Yeah, it's usually the week before. that I find is the most productive. Then. I start to mellow out again. Once I. start bleeding, it's like. >> So that pre- period, that pre-drip kind. of. >> Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. The. >> And is that that is that a crazy term to. use? >> Pre-drip. I feel like that that makes. sense. >> cuz I don't want to be like. unprofessional or whatever. >> Have you ever seen Under the Tuskin Sun?

>> No. Is that a Is that like a a euphemism. for a period or whatever? >> No. No. No. It's a movie, but um the. whole movie she's trying to open a. faucet and it doesn't work and then at. the end it just flows and she's happy. That's kind of what it's like. >> Ah. Oh, like Mad Max or whatever when. they finally get the water. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's actually. when it's like ah it's uphill from here, you know? That's kind of like we go. through a movie every month. >> Okay. Can you can you let me know how. much testosterone Trevon? Like what is. the actual increase? That's so cool. I.

didn't know that. >> Probably varies from person to person. amount. Like if you're lightweight about. testosterone, then you just get [ __ ]. up on it. Just one shot. That's all it. takes. >> But you don't start like like I'm trying. to think. You don't just start like. buying a Corvette or whatever, do you? Like what do you let me see the myths? >> No. >> In healthy women, the midcycle rising. testosterone is small in absolute terms. roughly 10 to 30% higher. Wow. So take. me on. Is this crazy to even ask you. about? >> No, I don't think so. >> Okay. You're from Stockton, right?

>> Mhm. >> Okay. I just want to get a little bit. about your life and then we'll go and. we'll come back and forth. >> So, take me through like how do you. [clears throat] know if you're getting. your period? Are you just like cuz is it. almost like you get deja vu like you're. walking and then you feel like is does. is it feel like getting deja vu kind of? >> Um it feels like I'm start I I get. obsessive anyway. I'm kind of an. obsessive person, but then when I'm. about to get my period, I get really. obsessive. Like almost I can't get out. of my thought loops. Whereas I can snap. myself out, >> but then when I'm on my period, it makes. me fixate on certain things or certain.

things I thought I resolved. Then it. brings it up again and then I just get. real like obsessive. I don't know how. But that it's different for everybody. I'm already obsessive, so I think it. enhances it, you know. >> Okay. >> Um what was the question? >> How do Oh [ __ ] The question was like, say I get a period, right? Say I'm. walking around town or whatever and I'm. gonna get a period or whatever. How do I. know I'm gonna get it? Like do I like do. you start to feel like your leg like. does it feel like your legs sweat or do.

you feel like So you said you start to. feel a little um more fixated on stuff. and you can notice it. >> Oh yeah, it's super different than. >> Dude, that's crazy, bro. Yeah, I get. like two weeks where I'm like pretty. happy, like feeling good, and then two. weeks of just a steady decline and. obsessive and then, you know, like um do. you always see how people perceive you. the same way? Is it pretty constant for. you? >> That's a good question. So, like do I.

always think like. >> Yes, I think I do. Yes, I think I do. I. think I always kind of think people sort. of perceive me the same way. I don't. know what it is. I haven't specified it, but I do believe that. Yeah. >> Like for me, I feel like sometimes. people perceive me better and then when. I'm on about to get my period, I'm like, "Ah, everybody hates me.". >> It kind of gets like more darker. that. like it's just kind of like real life. but with like a cloud, you know, like a. mean dark cloud that just like.

>> and you have to like think, no, this. isn't it's kind of like being on drugs. but a really bad one, you know, like and. it's a bad trip for two weeks, but it's. like it's not super intense. I don't. know. I don't know how to describe it. It's just. >> No, it's cool. It's the most I ever even. talked about it with somebody. And it's. interesting. because it's just crazy to think that. like maybe that's why women are so. resilient and tough, you know, because they have to like, you. know what I'm saying? They got like. an interior thing that's go they got.

like a they're going through like a. moon. They're going through like a. I don't even call it like almost like. going through the four seasons. >> Mhm. in their body and in their like. like. >> so true. >> in their mind and heart and everything. They're going through all that. So. they're like they're constantly sort of. having to monitor and see what's going. on with themselves and and kind of uh. come back a new kind of. >> except it's kind of like uh summer and. winter is what I feel like. It's like. summer and then winter just hits you.

just out of nowhere. >> We had a neighbor lady and something had. happened to her. I'm trying to think of. what happened to her. She fell out of a. boat or something. >> Mhm. >> And it didn't and it was going too fast. and she uh so after that something was. on kind of unwell with her with her. brain, right? She had a brain is issue, >> an overall brain issue. And whenever she. would get her uh period, she would put. uh like pot like hand warmers or.

something on. >> Okay. and she would stand out in their. yard down the street from us and she. would always sing like deaf leopard or. she would sing like uh lock up the. wolves. It's like it's like an old song. but it's kind of crazy that she would. that she was basically going through a. menstrual cycle and she would sing lock. up the wolves. like so you think her about to get. that's what made her do it? Did it help. her feel better? >> I think it probably did. It was some. sort of coping mechanism. She would. stand out on the like on the in the. porch in the yard and kind of vibrate a. little bit and she would sing like a.

couple of different songs and one of. them was Lock Up the Wolves. >> Dear God, >> how does that go? >> Uh, bring up the lyrics to it. Lock up. the wolves. >> Okay. It was like a metal song. >> Yes, >> that makes sense. >> Bring up that Lock of the Wolves, Rodney. James. Uh, that's Dio right there. Uh, in the house of the holy to the middle. of the mystic sea, at the cradle of the. world, there's a black cat screaming. And it's not even midnight. No. At the. cradle of the world, they're screaming. for sanctuary. They're screaming at you.

Lock up the wolves. Lock up the wolves. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Does that seem. [clears throat] like a period? >> Mhm. Totally. Yeah. Except you want the. wolves to get out of you. Get away, wolves. Get out. I'm tired of these. demons, you know. >> [laughter]. >> Enough wolves. Enough. You know. >> get out of my cat, you know. Speaking of. cats. [laughter]. >> Um. >> Meow. Cuz it hurts, too.

>> Oh, dang. Yeah. I got to think I got to. I sometimes got to remember that. Is it. crazy if you approach a woman and asked. her where she's at in that sort of cycle. pattern? Is that Do women feel like they. don't or I'm sorry. I should Some of. this stuff feels like I'm just like. >> cuz I'm a girl. You're asked me about. periods. Is that what you feel like? >> Yeah. I just feel like it seems kind of. cheesy and I don't mean to do it like. that. I just don't ever get to talk. about it. And somehow we ended up. talking about it. >> It's okay. I wouldn't overthink it. See, it's like this is what I would be like. if I was about to get my period. I would. get in my head about Oh my god. Is he I.

would still be thinking about the mullet. comment earlier. >> Oh yeah. >> And I wouldn't be able to be present. >> I think my whole life I've been about to. get my period probably. >> Well, you're a guy so Yeah. Exactly. >> Dude, think about it. If you're a guy, you never even get to have your period. You just have to do all the other [ __ ]. the whole time. >> You're on your period the whole time if. you're a guy. >> Oh, you are? >> Yeah. That's like us on our periods is. the closest to a guy just baseline. >> Well, what if a guy hugs you while. you're on your like when you're writing. that baseline? Is that like almost like. a gay moment? I wonder. >> Maybe. Maybe that's why it's like, you.

know, if you're straight, you're just. like, "No, >> get away from me, buddy.". >> Yeah. You only kind of want to be around. like I don't know if you actually I. don't really want to be around anyone. >> Huh. >> When around my period time. [snorts]. Yeah. I just wonder if we all should be. wearing some sort of thing that tells. how we're doing so people would know. when we get approached. Not even. ovularly. >> Yeah. You can't tell though, like. people's vibe right away, like, oh, they're not having a good day today. >> Yeah. I think sometimes you can, but. sometimes I think there's a little of.

you don't know. I met a girl at the gym. today and she um I could tell she was. something was a little bit. uncomfortable, but I didn't know what it. was. But then I just said, "Yeah, what's. what's going on? You know, you seem like. you're just maybe having like a you're. thinking about something. >> maybe like cuz she was like at the gym. trying to work out and you went up and. hit on her. I don't know. Like what's. going on? It can't be that I'm. interrupting you working out. [laughter]. I don't know. I mean, >> bro, >> like that can't be it. [laughter].

>> That could have been that could have. been a small part of it. >> You know what I mean? She's there trying. to like meet her goal and you're like, "So, so baby, which hat? [laughter]. What chat do you think? What? You're not. enjoying this? Hey, can I ask you about your period? [laughter]. Are you on it? >> Oh my god, dude. Why didn't somebody. tell me that there's something this. wrong with me? >> I don't know. >> Hey, you like my [laughter] hat? >> Hey, which one? She's like, I'm trying.

to bench 20s or whatever. I don't know. [laughter]. Please. [gasps] But I don't know. Maybe not. Maybe that wasn't it. Could have been. something else. >> It could have [laughter] It could have. been anything. >> It could have been anything. >> This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Yeah, we we we talk about mental health. more openly now. Hell, heck, sometimes. it's all anybody talks about. You'll you. know, you'll be like, "Hey, how how was. the game?" And people be like, "I'm not.

doing good.". But asking, actually asking for help can. still feel hard. And BetterHelp's latest. research confirms it. BetterHelp's 2026. state of stigma report surveyed 2,000. Americans and revealed that 85% of. Americans believe getting support is. wise. Yet 74% say society discourages. people from doing so. Cut out the noise. and do what's right for your own. well-being. BetterHelp can help. With.

over 30,000 therapists, BetterHelp is. the world's largest online therapy. platform, having served over six million. people globally. [clears throat] And they do the initial. matching work for you so you can focus. on your therapy goals. Don't let stigma. stand in the way of support. Start. therapy with BetterHelp. Sign up and get. 10% off at betterhelp.com/theo. That's betterhp.com/theo.

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We've all done it. Enjoy a full meal. plus premium chicken bites for just $7. only at Sonic. Live free. Eat Sonic. Um Christina Mariani, good to see you. today. >> Nice to see you, too. >> Uh you're so funny. Thanks for coming. by. >> Yes. >> Um, >> thanks for having me. >> You grew up in Stockton. Take me just. just so our audience knows because some. of our audience knows you. A lot of it. does, but some of them might not. Okay.

Right. And so, uh, take me through a. little bit of that if you don't mind. >> Okay. So, I was born in Loi, California, but just born there. Then I lived in. Stockton till I was like four or five, and then I moved to Italy. Um, and then. I moved back after a few years when I. moved back when I was 11. >> And do you remember being Italian over. there? >> Oh, yeah. Totally. I uh. >> really Yeah. Yeah. I mean, 6 through 11, you remember things, you know. >> Oh, wow. Yeah. Um,

>> and the the Romans, they're very Are. they Romans? >> Some of them. Uh, not all of them. The. ones in Rome are Romans and then the. ones in Tuscany just Italians, you know. And how was it like being around being. an Italian child? >> Um, you know, the kids are a lot more. brutal in Italy. They're like wild. animals. They'll just like beat you up, you know. Really? >> Here in America, they're like mean with. their words, you know, and like they're. more psychological about it. But in. Italy, they just are mean or they just.

beat the [ __ ] out of you. >> Really? >> Yeah. I remember when I first moved. there, me and my sister went to a. birthday party and I think cuz we, you. know, were new. Um, yeah. All the kids. started chasing us around and trying to. beat the [ __ ] out of us. And at first we. thought it was like hideand-seek or like. >> tag like a kid game. Yeah. And then we. were just hiding like we were like. really got really good at hide-and-seek. We were hiding under the table. We were. calling our mom like please come get us. but like in Italian cuz it was in Italy, you know. Dang. >> Yeah. But um.

>> so there was a level of like so they got. the Italians. Well, they're very handsy. Well, that's the thing. So I guess it. goes like even if it's violence or love. or something like that. >> That's true. Yeah, I guess so. >> They're very gesticular. You know, they. use their hands when they talk. >> Yeah, totally. >> You know, and when they I guess do. violence or whatever. >> Yeah, the Yeah, I Yeah. >> Does it Did it feel romantic? Do you. think people romanticize. like do you ever romanticize like. >> getting beat up all the time?

>> You mean like the mu getting beat up the. musical? Okay. [laughter]. >> Getting beat up the musical. my. childhood in Italy, the musical. It's. just me getting beat up for four years. [laughter]. >> But do you ever kind of like Yeah. Do. you ever like I don't know. I guess I. wondered if I cuz I like I'll like. romanticize or like kind of like make. something seem greater that was a long. time ago just because, right? >> Like what, for example, >> like the past was better, you know? >> But what's in something? It could be. just like um like when I was a kid, if.

you wanted to know if somebody was at. home, you had to go over there and see. if they were at home, right? Okay. >> Like now you could have your mom text or. you could text or send a uh. >> uh just hit them in the chat or. whatever. But now, but then you had to. walk over there. >> and you kind of get a clue. Sometimes. their cars would be there, car wouldn't. be there. Sometimes maybe one of the. parents would be home and they'd be home. sick or whatever. You'd even just try to. go in and play anyway. Like. >> Yeah. But you know, but you had to go. over there and so you had to create this. like, you know, it was kind of like a.

little bit of sometimes you'd be too. nervous to go ask. You just go stand in. there. Like I remember standing by my. friend's door for like 10 or 15 minutes. until one of his parents or somebody. just came out or came by like what are. you doing here? >> You just stand there. You're committed. >> Yeah. I'm like I'm waiting. Is is. William home? You know, and like he's. not home. He's out of town or whatever. But you know, so I think something like. that. Does that make sense? You think? >> Yeah. So like you romanticize it. it was. tougher for, you know, kids had to do. this sort of thing. That's kind of a bad. example, I guess. >> So, that's not romanticizing if you're.

thinking it was worse or you think it. was better. >> I thought it was better cuz it. challenged you a little bit more. You. had to actually go kind of It was just. like I don't know. Things seemed a. little bit more like you had to go and. have an actual human experience. >> to get a little bit of information. >> Yeah. I mean, >> that's what I mean, I guess. >> No. Yeah, I get what you're saying. I. feel like everybody says like social. media and like just how much access we. have to the internet is killing human. connection and I was thinking about it. and I think it's killing like the small.

talk of human connection you know now. you can't like. >> you already know what they did like. superficially now when you see them you. have to like talk about mental problems. you know like okay so I saw that you had. a salad for lunch and you're going. through a divorce tell me how you're. feeling. >> yeah like show me your croutons kind. Yeah, exactly. It's like now I know all. the boring stuff. >> Yeah. I'm trying to think of some things. maybe that I romanticize. >> But is romanticizing um healthy do you. think? >> Is that the word? Am I using the right. word? >> Yeah. I mean, I feel like if you.

romanticize something, you're painting. it with rosecolored glasses, >> right? That's what I'm saying. It's not. exactly like romantic, but it just means. you're looking back on something fondly. even though that may not have been the. way it was. >> But what was the way it was? Isn't it. better to romanticize everything then? So that way you're like looking back at. your life all romantical cuz like you. know last week or something you mean? >> Yeah. Even yesterday even this morning. at the gym you know with the girl you. could romantic. >> with the harassment you mean? >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You could romanticize. that. You could be like it was. unrequited love you know. [laughter].

>> Yeah it was. >> Yeah it was. And uh eventually the. universe will bring you guys together in. a more appropriate setting. >> You know you know what those videos that. are the wildest to see. Uh those reels. bro some reels it's like it's too much. It's like um 90% of your shower water is. chemicals. Have you seen those reels? It's like. >> Oh, yeah. The ones that try to sell you. the filters. Yes. >> Yeah. I've gotten one. >> Oh, you got one. >> I [laughter] got one. I believe them. I'm really gullible. I'm a sucker for. marketing. Do you know how many best. Bloody Marys in the world? I've had so.

many because they always say they're the. best and I'm like, I got to see this for. myself, you know? [laughter] And I. believe them. Why are they lying? You. know, they're never the best. They're. not even close. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Anyway, sorry. Keep going. No, that's good. But all of those things are. like that. It's like, uh, did you know. that your grandmother has forever. chemicals in her? You know, it's like. hugging your grandmother in the summer. again. That's a no no. It's like it's. just like [ __ ] That's like what? Like. we can't even hug our grandmothers now. It's like, oh, the forever chemicals. that na that nana has, you'll never get.

out of your arms, you know? >> Well, if it was your nana, it was still. phillis. That's what the chemical. [laughter]. >> cuz she's a [ __ ] I'm sorry. A call. back from earlier. That's [laughter] fair. Um. >> but I haven't heard that about um. hugging your grandma. Is that actually. something that's like a. >> No, but it's just these things that you. see. It's like nosebleleeds must be a. fat or whatever, you know? It's like it. every real is just something. It's. almost like it's just this bot that's.

making up two things and putting them. together. >> I feel like it is a lot of them. It is. bots that are doing stuff like that, >> you know, and then it's just like you. hope and then it attaches some sort of. thing. >> like that's a product. >> You know what I'm saying? It's like. nosebleleeds must be a huh time to get. some roller skates, you know? Or, you. know, time to get this new uh time to. get this new set of ice trays or. whatever, you know? >> Yeah. So, it's like two things that. aren't related at all, but they somehow. make it work for the marketing. >> Yeah. Yeah. And they just and it it it.

makes so many of them that that it. doesn't even care, dude. Like it all it. cares in the end is is if you buy. something, right? Um one of the craziest. things that I see on AI all the time or. I don't know if it's AI, but that I see. on uh that's reals a lot is the um have. you seen the one? It's like if your. husband is in. Wilmington, Kentucky, and you think he's. here on a business trip, think again, baby girl. Have you seen those? Mm-m. >> Damn. >> No.

>> See if you can pull up one of those for. me, guys. >> It sounds like they pray on people's. fears most of the time. Like, >> yes, this is a fear thing. >> Well, yeah, that's cuz like people. respond to fear. That's like So, if they. make it seem urgent, like, oh, this is. going to happen. You know, your. grandma's going to get cancer if you. don't. >> buy I don't know, Splenda, right? >> Yeah. [laughter]. >> Something like that where it's like, oh. man, I don't want grandma to die. I. don't want it to be my fault. >> Yeah. I feel like they use that. There's. >> Here's one. Yeah. What is this one?

>> Your name is Meredith and you live in. Nashville, Tennessee and you're dating. Kevin and he works at a car dealership. Run. He's not just test driving cars, baby. Run. >> But there's like I see these all the. time. >> Well, that's not even trying to sell. something. Do you think they're just. being nice or do you think they're being. shitsters? >> I that's what I just No, there's just so. much everything out there. I just think. it is it's about fear like you just. said. It's like everything out there. It's like it's just creating like oh my. god, you know, I mean this guy's a.

snitch or whatever, which is fine, I. guess. But I guess it maybe he's a good. snitch. >> Or maybe it's not even true. Maybe he. was just like people are going to find, you know, that he just fabricated it. I. always believe them though. I'm always. like, "Oh [ __ ] poor Meredith." You. know, I always I'm like, >> I'll comment sometimes. I'm like, "Prayers for mayor." [laughter]. >> You know, I'll put that in there a lot, dude. But yeah, I don't know. There's. just so much [ __ ] that's out there I. feel like. >> and it's I don't know. Sometimes it's. fun to figure out if it's entertaining. to me or if it's just kind of like I.

need to stay away from it. Um. >> so so okay. So you grew up you grew up. until 11 in Italy and then you moved to. where? >> And then I [clears throat] I moved to. Stockton again. >> Wow. >> You moved back? Yeah. >> Did you ever see Nate Diaz over there? >> No. You know that I feel like every time. I've been on Kill Tony, Tony always asks. me that and I No, no, no. It's okay. It's that's the only thing Stockton's. really known for. You think? I don't. think it's really nobody. There's. nothing else going on there. No, I ne I. never have. >> Well, how would you describe Stockton. then as like what would you say about.

it? Cuz there's probably a lot of great. things about it. I know there's a lot of. missing people up there. >> Mhm. Yeah. Crime is a big What else they. have? I know there's cigarettes. I know. >> Yeah. Yeah. Cigarettes. >> The Kings. >> The Kings. Yeah. No, that's in. Sacramento. >> Oh, Sacramento. >> Wait, is there a Kings in Stockton? No. Basketball. Sacramento. >> Oh, >> yeah. Yeah. Right. >> Yeah. Yeah. So, tell me a little bit. more about Dr. Nan. >> Um, I mean, you kind of nailed it. I. think that was pretty much it. I'm liked. it though. I think when you grow up. somewhere, you think that's your.

baseline. I think it's better to grow up. somewhere that's not that great cuz then. >> as I've moved around places, everywhere. else has been way better, you know. >> That's interesting. >> Yeah. So, um, my baseline is low for. where I lived cuz if you live somewhere. like really pretty like, um, I don't. know, Aspen, then everywhere else you're. going to be like or Australia, like can. you imagine? And then you move to. Stockton. But I guess I went from Italy. to Stockton, but. >> I don't know. >> That's a crazy push though. Italy to. >> Stockton. Different for sure. I lived in. the mountains. It was like in an.

isolated town. >> in Italy. >> In Italy. Yeah. There's like 300 people. Corfino. >> In Corfino. >> Nobody even knows about it. I feel like. uh when you look it up on Google, it. used to say human settlement. It didn't. even say like town or village. >> Wow, that's it. >> Yep. >> Oh my gosh. >> Nope, it's not. See, they always think. it's in a brutal. No, it's in. Tuscanyany. >> It's in Tuskanyany, man. >> Yeah, this is wrong. See, there's an I. man. >> Yeah, but that's how tiny it is. It. always brings up that one.

>> Got it. >> It's the wrong It's an imposttor. [gasps]. >> 300 people live there. Mhm. Yeah. >> Oh my god. >> Oh my. But as a kid that was awesome. >> It's a perfect amount. >> Yeah. We The whole town was basically. like we could play hide and seek in. which was good for me. [laughter]. >> Yeah. >> With the violence. >> Do you remember leaving it? >> Uh not really. Um it was really sudden. Our house is still like when I go visit.

it's still my h my room when I was like. nine or 10. They're still my toys. Yeah. My parents still have. >> the house we grew up in. Um but it's. still like untouched. It's like a time. capsule. >> Wow. >> Yeah. So it's crazy. I go back and I was. still playing with like Barbies and. they're still out and it's just there. and it's crazy kind of. >> That's Wow. That's Stranger Things. >> Mhm. >> Dang. And so uh why did your family. move? >> Um I think my dad, he's a really.

ambitious. He's always been a real like. project starter and it's just a tiny. town and he got stir crazy I think and. so he was like I can't do this anymore. Um then he wanted to move back. >> Yeah. I think also um just. [clears throat] in those tiny towns you. know people are in each other's business. all the time and I think he got sick of. that. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> It makes sense to me. >> It makes sense to me too. I don't think. I would want to live there now. I think. if I were to live there it would be when. I'm like you know retired. It's really. pretty, you know, like I could write up.

there a book or something, you know? >> Oh, yeah. I always romanticize about. writing a book somewhere. >> Oh, I'll write a book. >> What would you write a book about? >> I would probably write a book just about. I don't know. I thought about two guys. that aren't married that just keep. giving each other shitty advice about. like like they keep being each other's. like I'm going to help you find somebody. type of thing. I thought that that'd be. a funny thing to write about. I would. write about growing up, just people that. I knew, stories from home, things like.

that, things that I thought about, things that I think about now. Um, I would write a book, maybe a cook. And. so, some of it would be words, some of. it would be recipes. >> Okay. >> A little bit of that. Maybe. >> words and recipes. >> Yeah. >> A book is kind of like a bunch of words. >> Well, because sometimes I'm reading, I. get hungry. >> That's a recipe, huh? >> Sometimes I'm reading a book and I get. hungry and I'm like, "Oh, >> yeah. Yeah. No, I get that. It's kind of. like watching a movie, then you get. hungry. It's because your brain's. preoccupied and it's nice to do.

something while you're. >> right. I want to do two things at once. Yeah. You know? Yeah. But also if you're. reading or get hungry or you're and a. recipes right there. or a movie had a recipe right in the. middle of it. >> So you're saying like if um. >> like a recipe movie. >> like Oh, so it's not like Die Hard and. then in the middle there's just a recipe. for some reason like he stops to like. >> Yeah, it is that. >> Okay. Like that. So he stops and he's. just like, "Okay, let me make some food. or like just read the recipe." Or does.

he go through with it? Then he goes back. to killing German terrorists. >> Oh, does now if you could get that would. be cool if the person in the movie. >> Yeah. >> like Daniel de Lewis is suddenly. >> Yeah. Yeah. That's what I mean. >> Yeah. Helping you make like a tuna. tartar or something. I think something. like that would be pretty wild, you. know. Or he's helping you make like a. booya base or some kind of, you know, like a nice soup or something or koi. spot or gpatia or something. Yeah. >> Yeah. or like on Taken, you know, he's. looking for his daughter, but he has to. eat still. >> Yeah. Now he's looking for ingredients.

in his cupboard for all the ingredients. [laughter] Be cool, >> dude. See, I I used to think of like a. bunch of TV shows. I don't know if I. think of that many anymore. Have you. ever had Did you try to pitch television. and stuff like once you got into. Hollywood, did you try to pitch like or. once you got into like entertainment? >> Oh, I've just been working on some like. things, but I nothing that I'm like. comfortable pitching or anything yet, you know? Um but yeah, I mean just been. creative. It's fun to like explore. different. >> Did you have a dream for like a sitcom. type of thing? Like or did like what was. kind of your motivation towards like.

getting into comedy? Like there was a. time probably before my generation where. a lot of people were like I want to get. a sitcom, you know? And then now I think. it's been a it's been a little bit more. like I want to get a special and I want. to get like my generation probably like. uh I want to get a special or I want to. get a podcast, right? Maybe those. things. >> Oh, >> but I wonder like. >> Yeah. Yeah. Was there like what was some. of the reason like that like that you. kind of got into like being creative. like in this way? >> Well, I guess I've always really liked.

writing and um being artsy ever since I. was a kid and then for a while I kind of. neglected that part and you know like. when you become a teenager and then. college and then I was just kind of. lost. And. >> how'd you neglect it? What do you mean. like drugs? You went into nursing? >> No. No. I I think just um you start. other things seem to matter more than. just being creative, you know, cuz like. kids start bullying you and then you. start worrying about what people think. about you. And. >> I remember I used to never a lot of.

things that then I got insecure about I. never knew. I was just focused on like. creating or like drawing or writing and. then something like is like oh this. matters now like all the social like. aspect and then you know you kind of get. lost and you got get sidetracked and. then when I figured out what I wanted to. do after I graduated college I was in. insurance and I after a year I wanted to. kill myself and I was like how did I end. up being in an insurance job and then I. started thinking what did I do as a kid. that I made me like enjoy life so much.

and And then I kind of started doing. that stuff again. And then I that plus. things that scared me. And so then I got. into like trying to do comedy cuz that's. something I always like wanted to do, but I always was like scared and I. thought it wasn't like something you. could really do, you know? >> Um, >> did you see a certain comedian it made. you be like that or did you see like. it made you think like. >> Yeah, cuz sometimes I don't remember if. there was a certain comedian. I mean. maybe Chris Rock probably or.

I mean, Eddie Murphy was like the. biggest that people would pass when I. was young, you know, but then it was. like uh. yeah, I don't know. I'm trying to think. of other ones. I mean, there was like. John Caparulo. There was like um. I'm trying to think. It was like a. certain comedian that really got me into. it. One time I just went to a comedy. club. They gave you free tickets. They. would call all the time and get free. tickets. And I'd never been to a comedy. club. I never even se I'd seen comedy. like uh on television and stuff like. that, but I'd never seen it live. Yeah.

>> And so I went to a live show and I was. like, "Oh my god, so this is how it. works." And like somebody gets up there. and they do this and then people laugh. and everybody's just like in a room. having a good time. I was like, "This is. so fascinating." I needed that like. exact direct proof of like seeing it, you know? >> Interesting. >> What about you? >> I never had like a comedian that I saw. I just always liked to make people laugh. for some reason when I was a kid to the. point where my mom would get annoyed. with me because I wasn't that funny when.

I was like yeah I would try to make. people laugh because for some reason I. loved when they laughed at something I. say and then I would repeat it over and. over again and then my mom would be like. you got to shut up. That's just [ __ ]. annoying. And um I would always want to. make my dad laugh cuz I felt like I got. his approval when he laughed. He was. pretty strict dad you know. So then when. I could make him laugh he wouldn't laugh. at anything I would feel like. So then. that was something too like um. >> like making a black guy laugh kind of. >> kind of. Yeah, absolutely. That was my. dad. He was um. >> he's the black guy of the family. >> Yeah, he's the black present father.

though. He very much. >> Oh yeah. >> Yeah. Like he was he was there, you. know, >> different. >> Yeah, he was very [laughter]. um but uh I I forgot what I wasn't. saying. I'm sorry. Um. >> Oh, no. >> No. Yeah. So, I was I just like to make. people laugh always and I like to. create. And so, even when I got into. comedy, I didn't have like, oh, I want. to get on a TV show or anything. I just. really liked doing it and I just knew it.

felt right. And so, then I just like. like to write and get on stage and. perform it. And so, I've just been kind. of like, oh, this I just love to do. this. And um I like exploring other. avenues, too, but this is like the thing. I really like to do. Has touring been tougher than you. thought? Has it been a good time? Are. you enjoying more when you just get to. be at home? >> Um because you seem to be out there a. bit. >> Yeah, I really like it. I like uh going. to the airport. I like being on a plane.

I like being in hotels. I like the whole. experience. >> Really? >> Yeah. It's like relaxing. I don't know. uh why. Like being on a plane is. relaxing. All I got to do is think. I. like to just like close my eyes and just. think. >> Will you sleep on the plane sometimes? I. can't I can't sleep, but I'll like get. like relaxed, kind of daydream, you. know, like and just think about things. >> Oh, that's probably a good That's a good. call. >> Yeah, it's it's nice, you know? Um. >> Yeah. Oh, yeah, dude. The other day I. was on a plane and my friend that was. with me, he had to freaking do uh CPR on.

somebody. >> on the plane. >> Yeah. >> What? What airline? >> And I was like, it was on Delta and I. was like, "Dude, do not go do CPR.". They're like, "Does anybody know CPR?". And he [ __ ] raises his hand. I'm. like, "Dude, do not go do CPR right now, dude.". >> Cuz he couldn't do it. Did he like. >> I didn't know if he could do it. He's. like, "Dude, I can do it." I was like, "Dude, can I You cannot do it." He had a. couple drinks. I was like, "You cannot. be have a couple drinks and do CPR on. somebody.". >> But I mean, yeah. What if he threw up in.

his mouth? [laughter] Be crazy. [gasps]. >> What if that then brings the guy back, you know? >> Yeah. Yeah. And then he throws up and. they keep throwing up in each other's. mouth, but they're both alive. >> Yeah. At least. >> Oh, yeah. Oh, that's romantic. >> Yeah. >> Um, >> so did he did he do it? Did he give him? >> He did it, man. And they got the guy. going again. They got him back up. They. puffed him up to almost 200 PSI. Filled. him up. >> That sounds good. >> Um, dude, one time I told this story.

before, but one time I was at a. restaurant. It was like a breakfast. breakfast buffet. >> Mhm. and Magic Johnson was there and. somebody started they needed CPR or. whatever. So this guy like it was at a. table. It's like a kind of a nice place. and so they just kind of bring out one. of those like you know those folding. walls those Chinese folding walls or. whatever that they bring out like a. section like a section. >> like origami. >> Yeah. It's like a sectional that.

>> Oh okay. Yeah. >> Yeah. Uh uh. >> I think origami is Japanese anyways. >> Yeah. like a panel thing just to make a. make like a little area for something. >> Okay. Okay. >> They bring they bring one or two of. those out and they're just doing CPR. behind this these like little sectionals. while we're all the rest of us are. supposed to be eating. And you can hear. him like hammering away on this dude. Like they're doing like baritone [ __ ] on. him. >> And we're all like when do we eat? Like. cuz it's like cuz it's buffet and it's.

nice. And it was like. >> on the plane. No, this was awful plane. >> Oh, okay. I was picturing this was all. on a plane. I was like, there's a buffet. on the plane. [laughter]. >> No, this this was at a hotel. >> Really stepped up. >> This is at a hotel. >> Okay. >> And uh so everybody starts looking at. Magic Johnson to know when to eat cuz he. just became like it's weird like in a. tribe like somebody kind of becomes the. leader and everybody just looks over at. Magic Johnson. We're like all waiting. for him to eat and he had like a plate.

of little sausages I remember and. everybody's just waiting for him to have. a little sausage so we can all eat. It. was kind of crazy just like. and then they got the guy going. They. got him popping, you know, you could. hear him kind of gurgling a little bit. and popping or something and uh and then. he went down again. And so we all. started eating and then everybody like. gh everybody had to like set their. silverware down again and like okay. >> Oh man, >> you know. >> that's that's crazy because um what that. story tells me is that no one really.

cared about how the guy was doing. Everybody just was wanted to eat and. then they had to pretend because if not. you look like a horrible person but. everybody really just wanted to eat cuz. it's like who is this guy and who sent. him to ruin our meal? Yeah, >> that's kind of the vibe that I'm picking. up on [laughter] cuz if you're worried. about, "Hey, can we eat?" You're not. caring about the guy dying, nobody gave. a [ __ ] That sucks, >> dude. Oh, here was the worst part, though. We kept seeing the dude that had. saved cuz somebody saved him the first. time and then that guy had been like.

pumping too hard. He'd been like, and I. think his tries had worn out or. whatever. And he said his tries locked. up because he had like a he'd been. overdoing creatine or whatever. I guess. your arms can lock up if you have too. much creatine. >> What? It's like the opposite of oiling. your joints. Yeah, I think he just cuz. he was over there. I mean, seven or. eight minutes they were over there just. looking for oil in this guy, dude. They. were over there pumping him and you. could hear him, you know, and like. everybody's just like it was almost like. everybody's like Yeah. And everybody's. just waiting to finish their food, which. was getting cold,

>> you know, and it's not like save the guy. fast, but it's like. >> save him or don't save him. You know. what I'm saying? [laughter] Like, dude, I will say this. At a certain point, you. started to kind of feel like, hey, this. guy's had enough. You know what I'm. saying? Like, hey guys, we all kind of. feel like that's enough. Like, >> we gave it our best shot, the musical. [laughter]. >> It's just it's 40 minutes of CPR. >> Yeah. >> So, Dan, they get him popping and then. he goes down again. It's like, [ __ ]. [ __ ] [ __ ] You know, and I'm like, Magic Johnson, help out. Like, you you.

know, go over there and [ __ ] cuz he's. he's so good at like dribbling. It's. like, just go dribble the guy's [ __ ]. You know what I'm saying? You would. think if he just would go over there and. just double dribble the guy's heartbeat, you know, till it get I don't know. But. that's just. >> he just becomes black. [laughter]. >> Yeah. >> He's like, "Oh shit." And then he gets a. heart attack. Bad hearts. >> Oh, do blah blah bl. >> I think. So, right. Isn't it like high. cholesterol? >> I think they get sugar in their heart. >> The sugar just goes right to their. heart. >> I'm not sure that that sounds insane. I.

think they get sugar in their heart cuz. they have a lot of some black people. have too much sugar. >> cuz there's even people stopping. You'll. see people don't have any more sugar. I've seen a couple of black guys in my. area. They'll have a shirt on says, "I. can't have sugar. Don't give me sugar.". >> Really? >> Yeah. Black adults are about 30 to 50%. more likely to die from cardiovascular. disease than non-Hispanic white adults. >> I wonder why. >> I don't know. >> Does it say? >> Yeah, it say. Can you just ask why at. the bottom? And this is on perplexity right here.

Um, social determinance of health. Let me. see. Lower income unemployment and. poverty. Increased stress. That makes. sense. Unequal access to health care. So, some uh internal and external. Higher rates of high blood pressure. Dude, you know what was I thinking about. the other day? What was I thinking about? Oh, do you. see there was like Oh, I was thinking. about AI and just like the truckers that. are like like they won't even have any. more like they would have some. autonomous trucks out there.

>> So, like self-driving. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> And the self-driving stuff kind of gets. me a little bit. Have you seen the first. time a Whimo sees a gay guy? Have you. seen that? >> No. >> Oh, that's good. I'm trying to think. See if you guys can find that. But dude, an autonomous truck. And what if some. what if like some lot lizard is parked. behind like a you know a Flying Jay's or. whatever? like it's parked behind like a. Bies or whatever and some loter just. climbs in the cab, you know, like one of. those like kind of parking lot escorts. or whatever. She climbs in the cab and. she's like, "What do they even do then?".

>> Yeah. Um I I would think they would have. the doors locked so you wouldn't. specifically for lot lizards that like. like to pleasure trucks. >> I think you got to let them in though. You got to give the truck the full. experience. >> That's true. The truck is probably. pissed. >> Driverless semi. Driverless semi-truckss. have started running regular longdeed. routes in Texas. The semiis from the. autonomous truck Aurora [laughter] have. computers and sensors that can see for. more than four football fields. The.

company is starting out with a single. self-driving truck and plans to add more. by the end of the year. >> [ __ ] that, dude. That's too much for me. Um, what was. your journey kind of when you got into. comedy in the beginning? >> Um, so. >> you said you kind of got to be creative. Did you end up feeling like did you try. other outlets first? Like did you was. there like music or was there. >> Well, I used to um one thing I was. scared of was leaving uh home because I. feel like I'd just always been just, you.

know, my family's really Italian, really. close. They don't really like it when. you leave, you know? So, I was really. nervous to like leave. So, that was the. first thing I did that made me scared. was leave. And I knew they were going to. get mad at me, but I did it anyway. and. I drove from California to Texas. And. then once I was um and before that, I. would do things like go to the Grand. Canyon by myself, for example, and like. um. >> like to practice being out on your own. >> Yeah. Or to like practice just um Yeah.

Just being by myself and doing things. that like I used to feel self-conscious. about eating by myself in a restaurant, you know? So then I started just doing. that to get over that feeling. embarrassed like oh like just feeling a. lot of shame. I did a lot of things to. get over all these dumb things I feel. shame about because I had a lot of guilt. and shame I get from growing up I think. Catholic. And so I would just I started. doing a bunch of stuff to get me over. that and um just not not care about what.

people thought anymore because that was. I realized that that was keeping me. prisoner in my own life and I wasn't. able to like live it how I wanted and if. I kept doing it I was just going to wake. up one day and be old and be like where. the [ __ ] did my life go? I didn't even. do what I wanted because I was so. worried about what everybody else was. thinking about me. >> Do you know how you kind of got through. that moment? I can relate to that a lot. Like recently I start I like took a like. I finished touring for like a long time. and I've been touring for like. [sighs and gasps] I don't even know I've.

probably done half the weekends every. year or you know four days a week for 20. years maybe. >> uh every other week. So not all the time. but I've been touring for a long time. and now there's just like I have no. comedy dates on the books. I don't even. have to do it if I don't want to. It's. like you know I do want to I'm feeling. but it's like but for the first time I. was like a little bit of me was like who. am I? you know, like I don't. >> like I didn't have I always kind of. define myself, I think, by like. achievements. >> Mhm. >> Like some sort of achievement. >> Mhm. >> And I don't even feel much reward from.

achievements, but it's just the only way. I knew to like have like to define. myself for some reason. >> It's like a measure at least. >> Yeah. It was just something like am I. okay? Like am I like I guess I guess. this means I'm okay, right? If I'm. achieving something then I must be okay, >> right? Um, so that that's just been like. such a spot where I'm at. Um, >> right now, you mean like too? >> Yeah, just recently I've been there. I'm. just recently been there. And I went. into this plant medicine and. uh, and I like But they record you while.

you do it, like while you're under it. So then you can go back and listen to. the recording after. >> Most of the stuff, most of the stuff I. was saying was just like, "Am I okay? Am. I okay? Am I okay?" It was like this. like. >> this voice inside of me was asking this. all the time. So, do you feel like when. you achieve things, you can you're like, "Okay, well, I must be doing fine. because I did this and this and this, but then you feel kind of empty inside. because it's more like, oh, this is just. something that everybody gets to see. that you did, but it's not really about.

you. It's not really necessarily like do. you know your like the things you value? Do you live with like um doing things. like oh I'm nurturing this thing that I. value and this thing or is it more like. oh this is the goal I need to achieve. and then you kind of ignore what you. value to get to it. >> No I don't ignore what I value to get to. it but I do I don't I I think I haven't. had like a lot of like strong list of. what my values are. I think I have them. >> Mhm. >> I know I have them but I've never really. kind of listed them out. So funny you.

say that. That's kind of like what I'm. working on with this therapist right now. is like well what are your values? What. are your beliefs? um and um and and actually being able to. see, okay, well, what I'm doing, does. this go towards does this like honor. those or is this something that doesn't. honor those? Right. >> Um. >> so at least to give me more of like a uh. a map, like kind of a chart of what's. going on. Yeah. >> No, I just think I didn't know any way. Um.

I didn't it I I never felt like look at. me. I just felt like, well, what's a way. that. you can know you're okay? And it's like, okay, well, if I I have to achieve. something, right? Like, if I do. something then and we get it done and. everybody and and and it seems like. everybody thinks it's fine, then it must. be fine, you know? I just didn't have. any I didn't have any other I'd never. had a pattern built inside of me that's. like, well, this is really what means. something to you and this, you know. Um,

does that make any sense even? >> It makes I think so if I'm understanding. it correctly. Um, so it's kind of like. you it doesn't it feel almost though. like then you're not super present in. your life when you're focusing on like. okay this is what I got to do and then. you're not really like. >> really absorbing every moment and then. that gives you so much anxiety because. then you get to it and it's like oh well. where did all that time go that I got to. this but I didn't even live and now more. time has passed and now I got it but to.

what cost? I didn't even like really. spend the time enjoying it. >> Yeah. Oh, dude, that's so crazy. It's. like you're reading what I was writing. out yesterday. Yeah. That's what this. therapist was saying. It's like, well, you have to take time when you have. certain things that you're proud of that. you recognize that with yourself. Like, hey, man, I'm proud of you. You did a. good job and or we did a good job or. this is neat. Um. >> uh and so yeah, I just I never. >> I don't know. I never I didn't have a. strong other value system. Like.

thankfully I didn't have like a strong. immoral value system where I thought. like crime or murder or stuff like that. was okay. I knew those things but I. didn't have a much other sense of like. um. yeah I don't know. I guess I just the. only way I knew how to be seen like like. I guess if it was some sort of. achievement then I was being seen I. guess or something and and then that. made things kind of okay. But yet at a. certain point, you're just like, I I. wasn't even.

>> there. >> I wasn't even there. That's what it felt. like. I got I feel like I got to the end. of this touring and I was like, >> yeah, >> where am I? Who am I? >> It's like and you and then you're. thinking, but I should have been like. really enjoying this the whole time, but. I was just in my head thinking about. like either being hard on myself or like. that's what it was. >> That's what it is. And then you're not. like being really immersed in it. And. then it passes you by and it's like this. is a cool thing. everyone thinks it's a. cool thing, but I wasn't even really. there. Like, if I'm really being honest. >> Yeah. >> And it's hard to separate that like.

wanting to do something just right and. being present and just letting yourself. exist without worrying about doing it. bad, you know, cuz it's like you still. want to be like well represented, but. then that's still caring about what. other people think and it's not making. you be in the I think about this stuff a. lot too cuz I struggle with this stuff. too. Yeah. Yeah. That's how I can. >> that's how I can read it. >> Yeah. I know as you're saying this I'm. like damn that's so crazy. >> I've had these thoughts too before cuz. you get really in your head. You beat. yourself up all the time.

>> Yeah. People are like, "Dude, you're so. hard on yourself.". >> And it's like I I don't know. I I feel. that some. But it's like it's the only. way I know how. It's like. >> it doesn't even feel like you're being. hard on yourself when you do it. It just. feels like you're being realistic and. you're being like, "Well, I'm just not. an idiot." And you see people all the. time that are like not hard on. themselves and then you're like, well, I. don't want to be delusional like that. because that's not helping them, you. know? So, if anything, I air on the side. of caution and I'm a little bit I see. myself in a little bit worse than what. probably is true just in case so I can.

improve from that. Does that make sense? >> That's fair. Yeah. >> Um. >> Yeah. >> You know, but then but then you get to. these milestones and you're like, why. was I stressed out for so long? You. know, and then somebody will ask you on. a podcast like, "What was your favorite. part about touring?" And you're like, "Fuck, I was stressed out the whole. time. I don't even I can't even remember. something like I obviously I was doing. exactly what I want to be doing, but I. was so stressed out. I didn't even like. enjoy so much of it." And then you're. like, "Fuck." [laughter].

>> It's kind of like in you get in like. kind of this like paddle ball match with. or like this you get in like this uh. >> padell p what do they call it? >> Ping pong. >> Yeah. Yeah. you get in like this. ping-pong match with yourself. But yeah, I think in the end it's like I don't. know it takes focus to like do certain. things and it does take like um a lot of. self-monitoring and stuff like I grew up. with like a lot of self-monitoring like. always kind of monitoring myself like is. this okay? Is this okay? Do I seem okay? How do I seem? Am I okay?

>> How did where do you think you got that. from? >> I think I just didn't have anybody. telling me that everything anything was. okay. guess kind of. >> so constantly guessing like I used to do. like things like to soo myself when I. was growing up like I would rock on my. bed all the time as a kid. Um like my. brother and I's bed were on wheels and. they would wake in the morning they'd be. across the room like we would both have. like rocked and sometimes they would be. like kind of like over by like they were. both trying to get out of the room like. it was like cars trying to leave. Um. like there traffic jam. >> Yeah, traffic jam. Um I used to walk.

like step on certain things like monitor. where I was walking. I used to swallow. on both sides of my mouth like uh. >> like bite your cheek kind of. Yeah. >> Do certain things. >> cuz just to create patterns so some so. things would make sense to me in my life. like cuz I think I just didn't I had no. idea if anything made sense. >> Yes. >> And it was harrowing I think as a kid. cuz then you're so inter you're just. everything's internal. You're like this. sort of like a fish that [ __ ]. somebody put on some land. >> No, I feel like. >> and let you be alive. I feel like I um I. had most of my existential crisises as a.

kid. I feel like people have them as. adults. >> Existentially crisis. Will you guys. bring it up just so we can say it. because I know people we say it all the. time. >> But also maybe that's not the right word. for this cuz I was a kid, but um I just. I was just had so many questions as a. kid and I I was one of those kids that. asked questions to my mom all the time. and I'd freak out. I get like I throw up. sometimes because things didn't make. sense. Like, do you know? >> It sounds like a cartoon character.

Sorry. >> No, no, no. But it but it didn't like um. like being in space and then black holes. and then I'd worry about a black hole. forming right next to the Earth and my. mom wouldn't have the answers. I'm like, "But how do you know?" But how do you. know? Like that that can't happen. And. just stuff like that. Yeah. So. >> Oh, yeah. When I heard I was worried a. black hole that the music would be so. loud in there. >> In a black hole. >> Yeah. And I'm like, "I'm going to. [ __ ] hate that shit." That's why I. did not want to be an astronaut. >> That's so funny. That's so autistic. You. didn't want to do it for the loud.

noises. >> Well, just the loud music. I'm like, I'm. going to [ __ ] call the cops. They're. going to come over. Everybody's going to. get pissed. They're going to make a It's. going to be a world star video or. whatever. Um, what an existential crisis. is, an existential crisis isn't a formal. mental health diagnosis. It's a pattern. of thoughts and feelings centered on big. questions like, "Who am I? What's my. purpose? Does anything really matter? How should I live given that life is. fine?". >> Yeah. That's literally what I would. think about as a 5-year-old. And I. remember just seeing other kids playing. and stuff and I would just be like,

"Mom, what's you know, is the world. going to end?" You know, like just stuff. like that. Like uh. >> Yeah. I had to worry too early. I think. >> I Yeah. Yeah. I think Yeah. Worried all. the time. >> Why do you think you had to do it, though? >> I didn't I don't know. I think I just. was curious. I think it comes from. curiosity. Isn't curiosity cool? Like. it's like so double-edged sword because. curiosity makes us want to create and. ask things, but then also curiosity is. the reason for like I don't know. beastiality for example,

>> right? Cuz it's like it's all coming. from like a wonder. What if? >> Oh yeah, that's true. Beastiality. I mean. >> that's why the cat got killed. [laughter] It's because of that. Cuz. curiosity. >> Yeah. And I want to see that if they do. like a mural of that. I don't want to. see it. >> of a cat. If a cat got killed through. beastiality, I'm out. >> Um, but. >> sorry, I don't know how I got down that. train of thought. I uh, >> no worries. I don't think. >> we're talking about being curious and I.

don't know why I. >> No worries. I don't think we even know. what we're talking about, but it's good. >> No, no, we're talking about like. >> Do you think we're making any sense at. all? >> I I think so. >> I'm following you and I think I know. what you're saying. Do you know what I'm. saying? >> I think so. >> Are you thinking about the girl in the. gym? >> No. [laughter]. >> Okay. What if this whole time when we. were talking that's just what you were. thinking about? Oh, no, no, no, no. I. wouldn't let my brain just like I don't. let my brain just do that anymore. Like. I I'll try to stay locked. I'm happy to. be here with you. >> Sometimes I do that and I catch myself. It's like tabs and then I'm like, "Okay,

don't leave that tab open. Just close. that one out so that way I can. >> come back.". >> Yeah. I control the tabs. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> You know, every now and then the one of. them will get out of hand and I have to. chase it around the screen and [ __ ]. >> Yeah. It's like you get a virus. Yeah. Every once in a while, >> but I control the tabs. >> Yeah. It's like a porn popup and you're. like, "Fuck." [laughter]. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Um. >> but no, what were we talking about? >> We were talking about like um as kids. just being worriers too soon. >> Oh yeah. >> I think that's it. You just find for. some reason concern comes in too soon. for a kid.

>> and I don't know why sometimes why that. happens. >> I think um when you're a sensitive kid, that's part of it. Like you're. sensitive. So like but you don't know. when you're a kid that you're sensitive. Everybody else tells you you're. sensitive, but you don't know what. somebody else's experience is and how. they're perceiving the world. So, you. only know like, "Oh, that really hurt.". And everybody seems to not feel that, but to me, it hurt really bad and now. I'm being dramatic and I feel it so. much. Or like. >> And then you worry something's wrong. with you after. >> Yeah. Yeah. 100%. I always thought I was.

so weird and I always felt like, >> dude. >> Yeah. Did you feel it like that, too? >> Oh, I felt like my life was kind of a. nightmare when I was a kid. I'm not. getting in like I'm not in like any woe. is me [ __ ] but [ __ ] was kind of a. nightmare. And so I thought that. >> that the outside is just a reflection of. me, so I must be a nightmare. Like, oh, if this cuz the world just centers. around you. You're a kid. That's all you. know. So it's like, [ __ ] if. everything's so [ __ ] up out here, then. >> it must be it's a reflection of me. I. must be [ __ ] up, you know? And that.

like I think when you for me realizing. that well, I think it it just like I. don't know. It makes it makes a lot of. things. You're going uphill a lot. It's. up. It's a battle a lot. >> Yeah. And um I think it's kind of like, you know, when you get older, your taste. buds decline. I think um when you get. older also, like you get maybe less. sensitive because you're you get more. data and you get more used to like um. certain experiences. So then things. don't feel as intense. So you're still. sensitive now, but probably less than. when you were like brand new, you know?

>> Yeah. You start to get the hang no. matter what horse you're on, you kind of. get the hang of how it rides a little. bit. Yeah. So, I feel like a lot less. stressed out now than I did as a kid, to. be honest. I feel like as a kid, I was. like peak, like just everything was. overwhelming and too much, you know? >> Yeah. >> And then I felt like, how come everybody. else seems to be getting along and I'm. so weird and I'm trying to be like them, but I'm not. They're on to me, you know? >> I don't always feel like I was trying to. have to like I didn't always feel that. A lot of times I feel like I was having. to try to posture to fit in and I didn't.

really know where I fit in. And also. sometimes I was kind of glad that I. didn't fit into just one place though. Like I think there was bits of all of. that, you know. Um but I do start to. recently I start to like uh say thank. you God for these things that happened, right? Even if some of them are painful, I can say thank you. Even if something. was painful, I can say thank you God, you know, because um that's the only. way, right? like even if my like family. stuff like I can still be very grateful. to my mother for having me, you know, I.

can be very grateful to my father for. having me. like um instead of sometimes. being generally like I sometimes I get. in this space where I'm generally upset. but I I can still find a lot of specific. things that I'm have gratitude for and. that gives me like a different position. to operate from you know so it's I can. sit there and think like oh I'm upset at. my mom about this or this thing happened. or my brother or my boss whatever but if. I can find some oh thank them for this.

right and then that's kind of where I. can hang my hat on with them you And if. my thoughts start to go down some of. these other spaces, I can put up some. boundaries and say, "I'm not going down. those spaces anymore just because it's. not the best place for me to be." Does. that make any sense? >> Yeah, 100%. And um it's it comes from. selfrust and open-mindedness. And it's a. fine line. That's what I've been. thinking about, too, cuz I've been like, is it that I don't trust myself or I'm. open-minded? I tell myself I'm. open-minded, but is that an excuse to. not trust myself? Do you know what I. mean? like like um sometimes you want to.

be open-minded and not think oh I know. all the answers because most of the time. you don't know all the answers so you. look for like you you're open to what. people have to say and feedback which is. good but then it can go too much to. where you don't even listen to what you. think and you're you know the gut. feeling because with the excuse of oh. I'm just being open-minded I don't want. to be like I know everything you know. >> does that make any sense so so then. sometimes it's like Oh, the measure is.

if people are liking it. But then if. that's the only measure and you're not. thinking like in your gut, I'm not proud. of that. That's when you end up feeling. like cuz I've done things where people. have liked. But then I've been like but. you know that doesn't really reflect my. values very much and I don't feel good. about it even though it went viral. I. don't know if I really feel good about. that. Oh yeah. It's almost like you sold. out a little bit because you didn't. listen to the voice that was like but is. that something you value even if. everyone else likes it? >> Yes. That's something I still value. There's things that I've put out there. like or that are out in the world that I.

wish sometimes uh I hadn't put in. certain like could be a special or this. or that. But then some of it is I won't. even be fair to myself. I will hold. myself to my older myself when I taped a. certain special or something to a. certain special. I only have two. specials. I will hold myself to when I. taped the special or when I put a. certain joke out there. I'll hold my. current self to those to the time at. that time. You know what I'm saying? >> Yep. like I'll hold the the person at. that time to my current like way of. looking at the world. So that's when I.

start to realize, man, you're too hard. on yourself. You're holding a past self. >> to a current belief. >> That is like if you watch somebody do. that, that would be it would be insane. to watch somebody do that. >> So that's when it's bad to romanticize. something is when it holds you trapped. into it. >> You'd think romanticizing is good, but. then it's just making a story that's. better than the current one, and that's. not good. Well, sometimes romanticizing. I I think this is interesting because. we're kind of bringing it back to that. Sometimes romanticizing is uh.

it's almost a savior way of like if you. really. had those moments from the past or those. feelings like sometimes maybe you're. grateful that your brain romanticizes. them, you know? >> Mhm. Like maybe if you were trapped in a. you know if you were like imprisoned for. like as a prisoner of war and but. there's you the thing you remember the. most is like chats with the guards on a. Sunday right you know it's like um or. being able to sit there in peace and. meditators you know I don't know.

>> totally well it's like if all the. stories in your head are not quite right. why not make them good so that way you. have like a good like story because if. it's all made up anyway why not make up. something fun, you know, instead of like. making up something bad. It's all made. up. Like I think. >> Yeah, dude. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. You're so true. Yeah. I think. real. I started I think I'm I'm so. funny. I'm like just like in the past 10. days like in this place where it's like. I'm realizing a little bit more of the. control that uh I have over how to frame.

some of my thoughts and frame some of. the ways that I'm looking at things and. how kind of off some of it has been, you. know. And yeah, I guess I'm grateful. that I can still kind of learn and it's. definitely a slow process. I don't like. to I don't I don't know every it's like. I like to be I don't know. I like the. comfort of the old thoughts and ways but. it's just after a certain point it. doesn't it's not serving you anymore. >> Yeah. I feel like it's like um it's like. going on a diet or eating healthy but. with your brain. So like when you're.

like reframing things, expressing. gratitude, being present, that's you. eating healthy. But every once in a. while you want to dip into the junk. food. And that's the, you know, going. back and thinking about things that. don't even make you feel that good, but. for some reason you do it anyway even. though it's not helpful because because. why? Like it must be doing something to. do that, >> right? >> Yeah. Oh, well, I think for me, Christina, I real there was a time where. I was like, man, sometimes I don't want. to leave these old feelings of being. sorry for myself or feeling bad or.

thinking about the sad things. Sometimes. I don't want to leave those feelings. Sometimes I would. >> cuz they're the only for at a certain. point for years they were the only. friends that I felt like even had like. somewhere deep inside of me. Mh. >> It was like those are the realest things. I knew was like how much pain I was in. or how I felt or like this level like a. certain level of discomfort. >> They were like my closest friends. Does. that make any sense? >> Like they were the things I felt the. most. So to leave them. >> it almost feels like you're abandoning a.

a big part of yourself which for in some. ways sometimes you are you know. >> and I feel like sometimes it's. comfortable to be in that mindset of. like um pain because if you start. feeling too good that kind of sets off. alarms it's like uh oh now I have. something to lose but if I can like. retreat in the safe place of like not. misery but like pain then it's like well. I was already there and I didn't expect. much more you know and it's almost like. a protective mechanism Cuz it's scary to. feel completely good. >> It's scary to feel like you deserve.

something. >> Yeah, that too. Like you But yeah, >> it's not it. But that's a lie. But that. was a lie that I think was stuck in me. for a long time. It's scary to feel like. I deserve something or if I feel like I. deserve something, what are other people. going to think of that? >> Yeah. Or like, oh, am I going to jinx it. if I feel I don't know. That's kind of. like. >> I think there's some karma in there. >> Something like that. Yeah. Too. It's. like all these like, oh, I need to like. keep putting my making myself smaller so. that way I don't lose everything almost. or I don't like [ __ ] it up because I'm. being like I'm giving myself too much.

That's not good. Like I don't know why. we feel. >> I think there's a there is a nice. balance with that though because I think. the world like you do want to watch your. ego because your ego will also trick you. right. >> into thinking that you know you deserve. like everything's like you know that. there's something more special about. you. you know, it's okay to think that. there's something special about you, but. to think that there's something more. like I don't know. Yeah. I don't know. Um, >> it would Yeah. But it wouldn't be like. that. It's like a fine line between ego. and like loving yourself the way you.

love like your sibling or your mom or. somebody, you know, like cuz like when I. see my sister for example, I'm like. she's amazing. She's great. She can do. whatever she wants. And that's not me. being like thinking that like some. ego-driven thing. It's just love, you. know, but if you look at it towards. yourself, >> it feels like ego when you do it towards. yourself, you know, when it's like, no, but I do that for other people. Why do I. feel guilty doing it for myself? It's. not like from a place of superiority. It. should be just love. And I think that's.

the struggle. It's loving yourself, >> but like keeping yourself in check, like. not. >> It's the difference. It's the difference. being like egotistical and loving. yourself. But it's a hard difference to. distinguish, I guess. But I think. thinking about it and seeing it a little. bit and having a conversation with it, you know, like, well, why do I act this. way for like what what do I get out of. acting this way or what am I afraid of. if I do behave this way? And like but. but having those some of that self-. conversation. >> I think it's like that's pretty key and. some of it can be fun to have some of.

that conversation um before you go cuz. we got to stop in a few minutes cuz they. have to they're going to this is a. restaurant and a nightclub and here in. Austin, Texas. >> It's cute. I've never been here. >> You haven't? >> No. But I liked it. It's a good area. >> Yeah, it's great. We're glad that you're. here. >> Yeah. Thank you. >> Um. what uh when when was the first time. your parents came to see you perform? And what did they think? Cuz obviously. if you got. >> see me perform, they've never came to. see me perform. >> Really? >> Yeah. They uh Oh man, they were they. were not happy with me doing comedy for.

a long time. They're okay with it now, but they haven't seen me perform yet. And um part of it was me, too. I don't. know if I really want my parents to see. me perform, you know. Why do you feel. like it's your own thing or something? >> I I just I feel like um I can I really. care a lot about hurting my parents'. feelings and like um making. disappointing them or doing if I say. something that they don't think is quite. right. I don't want to get censored. because I know it's going to get in my. head like whatever they think. And I.

want to be like when I do comedy, I want. to be as honest and real with people and. connect with them in the most genuine. way I can without feeling like I can't. talk about this because my dad's going. to get mad at me. You know what I mean? >> Cuz then I'm not doing what I'm supposed. to be doing. I'm thinking about what. somebody else wants me to do and then. I'm not being myself and then I'm not. even doing a good job at that point. >> Yeah. Then you're wasting everybody's. time. >> Yeah. It's like that's then that defeats. the purpose of uh But that's something. I'm trying to get over too. That's where. I don't care about not in a bad way. I.

don't care what my parents think, but. more in a like I'm my own person and I'm. going to trust that they love me anyways. if I you know. >> like no matter what here. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. That's it. [snorts] Wow. Yeah. I. forget I didn't have much of a. relationship with like at my parents at. that time really. So there wasn't like I. didn't have to worry about any of that. But I forget that some people have to. worry about like Yeah. when your mom. first sees you're doing your some of the. stuff and like how that feels. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. It's interesting to see like to. put that in front of them. >> Yeah. Yeah. And I had like you know my.

they were very involved in my life and. very like you know not passive parenting. at all. They were very so and they. raised me a certain way. Very strict. parents you know. >> Oh that's tough. >> Yeah. Yeah. So it was very like so it. was even hard for me to like move out. comfortably without feeling like oh I'm. doing something they don't want me to be. doing. That gave me a lot of anxiety. And I know it's like sounds kind of. dumb, I guess, cuz it's not that big of. a deal, but to me it was. >> No, it's a huge deal. Disappointing your.

someone that loves you, disappointing. your parents. I don't have tattoos. because I know that we're hurt that. would make them feel bad if I got. tattoos, you know, and I don't I guess I. don't want them that badly. But. >> I think when your parents are really. involved and were really strict and it. and it's from the best. They love me, you know, >> but sometimes it makes you like not feel. like your own person until you leave for. a while and then you're like, what do I. actually like? What do I want to do? What do I think? >> Yeah. >> You know, I don't know. I don't want I. don't mean to keep going because I know. you got to go, but.

>> it's okay. Yeah. Well, it's okay. Yeah, the time limit just happened. We didn't. know. Yeah. >> And we've been having a nice time. chatting and I think it's like um Yeah, it's been cool. And yeah, and that's. important stuff. And sometimes we talk. about or like that's unique things, but. that's real stuff that happens for. people. It's like yeah, I don't want to. disappoint. What am I am I being too. this and how do I grow and like how do I. you know, it's like we're all kind of. examining the walls um to see like, >> you know, what the space looks like. Um, >> but yeah, I just appreciate your time.

And yeah, we'll have we'll just have to. do it again soon so we can have a. >> we have to talk about some more of this. stuff. >> Yeah, I love talking about I think about. this stuff all the time. Me too. Oh my. god. Constantly. And then the more I. think about it, I feel insane sometimes. I'm like, I got nothing figured out. It's like they think I figured something. out and then I'm like, I didn't really. though. There's like. >> there's so much more. And then it's. like, is any of my thoughts even my own? Sometimes I just go crazy. I go down. rabbit holes. Yeah. And then I'm like, I. got to stop like cuz I'm just I need to. be present. Then um sometimes I smoke. weed so I can get present. That helps.

quiet down the. >> the all the voices that are constantly. like just getting high and watching a. movie and not trying to predict what. happens because that's what I'll do. I'm. just like, "Nope, just go scene by scene. and don't try to figure it out. Just. experience it how it's supposed to be. experienced, you know?". >> Yeah. No, experience it how it's. supposed to be experienced. Yeah. I. mean, I think it's what we're all trying. to do with life, you know. Um, Christina. Mariani, thanks so much for hanging out. Thanks for touring with me some and. doing some shows. Fun.

>> Yeah, super fun. Thank you for having me. on the road with you. I did that when I. was 2 years in. That was insane. experience. >> Oh, wow. That's crazy. I forget about. that. >> Yeah. Then it went from like doing. little rooms to [ __ ] arenas and. theaters. That was crazy. >> Did we do somewhere really cool? My. brain's bad. >> Yeah. No, we did. For me, it was really. cool. It was like a 8,000 person. Um. >> Oh, that's awesome. >> Yeah. You tripped on the stool. I. remember it was there. >> Oh yeah, was Oh, no. Uh and uh. >> Ari. >> Ari was there. >> Yeah, Ari was there. Yeah. Yeah, that.

was the biggest place that I've done so. far, I think. >> Well, um yeah, we'll have to do some. shows here when I'm in town, too, because I'm going to be spending more. time here because I got to start. practicing comedy again. Um coming up, you're in Apple, Wisconsin, Chicago, Illinois, La Hoya, uh comedy store. there, Sunnyale, CA, at Rooster Te. Feathers. Tell them I said hello over. there. That's a beautiful place. um at. the Bend Comedy Festival, Rochester, New. York. Um I love there Garbage Plate. Central Pittsburgh Comedy Bar. >> I'm go to Europe next um in January too.

later. >> And you're doing shows in Europe in. January. >> Yeah, in January and February. Yeah. And. I have a podcast too. I almost forgot to. >> say that I have a podcast. So I on my. YouTube it'll. >> And what is it called? >> I don't know. I think I was thinking um. this upcoming weekend. >> This upcoming weekend. >> What do you think? [laughter]. Yeah, dude. I think. >> What do you think of that name? >> You think that's good? >> Yeah, I think it's one of the better. names [laughter] here. >> Yeah. Should I call it that for real?

>> I think it's not a bad idea. >> I have no idea what to call it. So, >> um, how about this? I'm going to think. of subtitles and if you haven't started. by the next time we talk, uh, by the. next time that we podcast, >> I'm going to call it this upcoming. weekend. I swear to God, I will do it. [laughter]. >> if if there's nothing else. >> Well, look, don't second guess it then. Don't think too much about it. I think. that's a great choice. >> [laughter]. >> U Christina Mariani, thank you so much. >> Thank you. Thank you. [music and singing]. >> I must be corner stone.

Oh, but when I reach that ground, I'll. share this piece of mind I [music]. found. I can feel it in my bones, but it's going to take.