Bumpers Off | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #334

what's up what's up you little knuckle. huffers. how you guys doing out there out there. probably been sniffing your daddy's. gasket i know it. and you've been out there crumbing. around on your grandmother's freaking. skirt. praise god baby good to be here with you. i am um what am i doing i. am well i tell you a damn branch fell in. my yard.

a damn branch man uh. you know you know one of mother nature's. damn knuckles bro that [ __ ] just fell. in my yard man it just um. i mean a branch is basically it's like a. tree just taking a [ __ ] in your yard. let's be honest you know and so that. thing hit you know it hit down in the. yard and the man came. and uh you know the branch man up there.

from richard's branch company or. something. richard's forest or d forestry or. something i don't know what they were. doing some kind of. i mean it's probably you know people. using drugs and trying to get better and. but working with branches in the. meantime and stuff but um. the man came and he said eleven hundred. dollars. to get the branch out of the yard. and that shook me a little.

you know that really twisted my dick man. honestly. you know it felt like somebody just. wrapped my nuts around my dick. because 1100 that's all you know dude i. had a felony mold building. offered to kill someone that we both. knew that we didn't. you know i guess think. should be alive he offered to kill him.

for a thousand so you telling me richard. that i can get a bra a man a human. removed from the earth for a thousand. but eleven hundred out here on this dead. wood. [Music]. so i'll tell you what i did i'll tell. you like what i did i got me a fiskars. saw. i brought it.

i got me that fiskars 18 inch right. there. with that antelope front. you know that anteater that gripper baby. and as he's telling me. as he's telling me eleven i'm cutting. that bastard off and throwing chunks. over the fence. there goes two hundred dollars worth. right there now we down to 900. richards. and he's still rattling on about the.

price and then she had said we gotta. have our guys insured. i said [ __ ] put on some cleats you know. what i'm saying protect your ankles. daddy. and i sawed off another chunk and threw. that bastard over the fence. now two-fifths of it's gone richards. we're down a damn uh. seven eight hundred dollars worth of. branch left according to you. so you just gotta be careful though gal. jam.

they will gouge ya. here we go robert randolph and the. family. band. baptized me. [Music]. dirty.

i'm.

dip me in the water baby. [Music].

what else. he baptized me baby boy. and there you go with the awkward fade. out per usual. and you know that that's how i do that.

oh i'm begging you please baptize me and. that's. robert randolph and the family band. i mean i remember seeing him. at a hotel somewhere and. was it atlanta maybe or. somewhere i just remember seeing him at. a at a hotel. and man i was just fired up. i saw him in the lobby he wouldn't. remember this is a decade ago.

you know back when i was young and my. chunk was thick back then. and my body was strong. but baptize me that's what they say. dipped me in the water. take me to the real wow. but. and we back from easter you know i'm. saying all these eggs have been hunted.

and it's spring time is in the air. and you'll see it a lot of lady be. flashing that that bottom. trying to get sprayed in trying to get. um. affection. and it's that time of year it's it's. interesting that mother nature built in. a time. where the spunk starts to fly baby you. know it.

where the titties starts to perk. mother nature built that time into the. clock. it's pretty fascinating but happy. belated easter everyone. you know jesus is back hide and go seek. that i'll tell you this. hide and go seek champion brother. yes christo you know what i'm saying. that mexican-american bad boy jesus.

christ. i mean the fact that they couldn't find. him for a couple days he's dead he's not. dead he's back he's ghosting. and now all these [ __ ] want him to be. honest with you praise god. um i hope you had a nice easter man i. went to. louisiana spent time with my family. uh what did we do we had we had some. you know we did a crawfish boil down.

there. and you know the crawfish boil everybody. comes out people come out whether. they've been. hiding for the winter whatever you know. your cousin little andrew come out he. got a new mole on his face. say he's talking to a girl or something. he ain't talking to no girl everybody. knows that [ __ ]. you know your friend come out he's. handicapped your brother buddy come out. he was in a fire. maybe big tiffany was in a uh in a fire.

she got burnt out. you know and she got some sav on her. back or something. but but yeah happy easter man uh. baptize me. that's what he's saying robert randolph. baptize me. put me in the water. you know it's fascinating about. baptizing it's just getting that wash.

you know that's the. that's the freaking lord's car wash. right there. and they dip you through that plane of. water and air. it's really fascinating because you. could take a fish in one hand. and you could take a bird an air bird in. the other. and you could switch them at the same. time put one under water one out of the. water. and they both can't handle they can't. handle less smoke baby on the lungs.

it's just interesting what a what a what. a line of pressure. what a what a horizon of existence that. plane is between water and air. it's pretty fascinating. and we used to be in water when you're. born when you're an infantile. a baby you're in your mother's body you. in there about you.

you backstroking in that vag gravy dog. you bet you. backstroking. in the lord's butternut squash baby you. bet you know what i'm saying you're in. there. you in that hot tub baby up in the. ovaries. you hot tubbing. and you breathing water you're breathing. liquid let me look it up to make sure. cause i'm. i don't want to lie to you do we.

breathe liquid when we are baby. uh do we breathe liquor baby the. mother's placenta helps the baby. breathe while it is growing in the womb. oxygen and carbon dioxide flow through. the blood. in the placenta most of it goes to the. heart and flows through the. baby's body at birth the baby's lungs. are filled with fluid.

it's just pretty it's just wild how that. baptism that dip. they're really they're almost taking you. back to whenever you were made when you. were. you know before you were after market. before the devil got to you and before. you were after market. and before you got you know when they. when they baptized you they're almost. just dipping you in that water. just saying hey remember this remember. when the lord had you all. fished out when you was gilled out.

it's interesting man i think it's. interesting what the hell do i know. um but you had a good time man i slept. in a child's bed. you know with no child in there because. you know i'm. i'm happy to not be a pedophile or to be. um. doing anything like that. and i want to thank god right now that. i'm not a pedophile man because.

it just seems unrewarding. it seems. it just seems like there's no. you know it's the one sport you can't. really tell anybody you play. if you do it and it's uh i miss the. devil's backgammon and i'm glad i'm not. doing it today. or ever ever also i want to say that i. want to say ever. as well and i'm going to say it loud um.

what else is going on. um oh i'm in a new studio anything about. that here i am. we've got a new fake plant. dude i'll tell you this a fake plant. costs 119 dollars. 119. for this [ __ ] front yard toupee right. here baby boy.

119. dollars for this [ __ ] chlorophyll. skin graft dog. 119 dollars. for this fern baby to fit this [ __ ]. now fascinating that's the market we. need to be in the fake plant market. you know when i was young we grew up. next to um.

a place where they was doing uh. what is it called not projectiles but um. uh. what's it called when you need something. to reach something um. but you don't have it something happened. fire hatchet. you know accident something like a. prosthetic. we grew up na over near a prosthetic.

place and sometimes we'd go in there. after hours and the men would be in. there and they would hold it and uh. they'd get you a beer or something if. you wanted. if you was of age they would you know. they kind of had the. arm and the leg kind of where you could. drink you know use it to have some beer. for the adults but. yeah and early prosthetics man them. [ __ ] was really. uh it was bottom shelf you know some. were rubber i remember.

um someone had like a little thing you. could pot a cigarette or something just. like [ __ ] that was kind of vague you. know. uh but we grew up not far from a place. that did that. um what was i talking about i don't even. know. but yeah i got that fisker 18 inch blade. and that's what i use to solve my. problem right now. in my own yard.

but yeah being a homeowner is really. jarring. you know i'm out here in the central. east and i got a locale now and. it is it's just like every time i. leave it's like ah do i leave the lights. on what's on. is the oven on is the garbage disposal. on is the um. porch light on is the back porch light. on. you know there's just so many little. things to think about. and before i never had a i would leave.

the house with everything on garbage. disposal. lights uh thermostat. um everything [ __ ] cut it all. on you know let this [ __ ] vibrate while. i'm out let it shake a little. but now it's like everything's just like. okay. i guess everything's fine so it's just a. tricky time man. uh i want to uh thank uh liquid death.

for supporting us. they're a beautiful supporter. and it's good water if you like canned. water from the mountains you will. enjoy it and if you want to die die wet. i say that's the only way to do it i was. thinking about water and. ah and that song had me thinking about. it that baptized me by robert randolph. had me really thinking about that water. that agua baby that spanish water. and uh i got some shades right here i.

threw these bastards back on. you know i was thinking that. you know water was one of god's apps. originally. you know people are shocked that god god. have some good apps when you think about. it. water fire gravity. um smoke wolves. what else maybe.

lightning maybe i guess i mean lightning. is good but. yeah lightning and. that's probably one of the some of the. top four or seven. and the thing is is that uh. those are the those are the original. apps people nowadays think oh i got this. i got. go puff i got you know big girl or. whatever some of the apps are. [ __ ] that is that's nothing cause the i.

mean god had those apps baby fire. water dude he pressed that water button. atlantis dog you know what i'm saying. the bus stop was suddenly freaking 400. feet under water. you know he he he uh pressed the fire. button. and bam son san bernardino was born. you know it's just we got to think about. the power. mother nature really has the ultimate. apps even though we get caught up in our.

own we start to. get further and further from nature. you know i get further and f it's kind. of remarkable because i'll see a drone. and i'll be fascinated but i'll see one. of those. fat bumblebees one of those freaking. lemony. thickets you know and i won't think i. won't. be like oh whatever you know. i'm kind of scared or i'm not scared i. can't really decide but.

wasps i know i'm scared fat bumblebees. like. by the time i decide if i'm scared or. not i've kind of left wherever. it was at and they didn't have them when. i was young they didn't have those fat. bumblebees. these [ __ ] are new these bit they're. from mexico or somewhere. where you know there's been a lot of. incoming traffic you feel me.

so that's a new thing man. but it's just funny that i'll see a. drone and be fascinated but i'll see a. bumblebee. and be like uh and it's like damn that. thing's working without batteries baby. boy. that's you know. that's the lord's drone right there. so that's a lot of what's going on um.

what else i want to let you know that i. got a tour i'm going to do a new tour at. the end of uh. not the end but a little bit later in. this year. i don't really know what to name it yet. but i'll be thinking about it. if you have suggestions for a name as. always you can hit the hotline. 985-664-9503. um also let you know that gang gang the. slides are back in stock. there's footy for those footy fashion. pieces baby.

and um to be good to yourself hoodies. are back in stock as well. so a lot of nice stuff going on. uh what else let's hit a little bit of. news here bad. baby join only fans and if she's the. cash me outside girl. and she definitely you could tell she's. probably been banging a lot of brothers. and that's. let's be honest dude. you know you ain't getting near her. unless you really.

that cafe de calor with a little neck. tat fam you feel me. like i bet an ankle brace it makes you. know really makes her feel erect. probably. and i can say that she's not a child. anymore also is this is this a crime. um but anyway she's on only fans now. and they said she made a ton of money on. only fans the most ever like a million. dollars let me read it actually. uh she turned 18 and made one million. dollars in six.

hours pretty crazy. you know what scares me about apps is. that. just how they can quickly share whatever. information. and just the freedoms we allow them to. have. you know when i was growing up and i was. a child. if you say you bought something from. somewhere. you know you bought your little don or a. little crawler from the bakery.

and they'd have a big lady working over. there look. if it wasn't if it wasn't a big lady. working at the bakery. i'm leaving okay okay boss i ain't. buying a [ __ ] donut. from some little cr you know some skinny. little biscuit. you know some little uh. purulene you know or whatever those are. called those skinny sweet sticks. p rulings and sometimes i'll be honest.

somebody break out a thing of pure. orleans they probably it's a gay man. and that's factual man but in no shade. bro. but what i'm trying to say is um. the bait if. you want a fat you want a thicky thicky. thick. you know you want that. you want you know you want captain. thickeopodomus working at the bakery you.

want a dude who's putting butter on his. own arm and about to [ __ ] slice it up. and eat it. you know you want that big [ __ ]. who's in there just frosting up them. front tats bro. you want somebody thick at a bakery. because you know it's going to be good. but what i'm saying is in the old days. if you walked into a bakery you bought. something. they didn't run out the back door of the. bakery and tell everybody what you. bought.

there wasn't somebody running out the. back door saying oh you know theo loves. uh. chocolate rum raisin uh doughnut. holes so then now for the rest of your. life. you have some chocolate run rum rum. raisin hitman. looming around at every turn. because that's what it's like now you. get on any app you buy something. for the rest of your life they haunt you.

with the [ __ ] you want asics. you want asics bruh you'll be getting. your mom a damn. casket and you'll be like damn. nothing go with that casket like some. dark ass asics. you want these wood grain asics like. [ __ ] i don't want any a6. that was years ago. but you know so you didn't have that. back in the day but. now you buy anything you have it.

and so it's a little alarming to me in. the sense of an 18 year old. gets on to the sex world and is selling. sexuality selling that kind of stuff. it's not wrong. and and everybody's opinion is is valid. but what worries me is then. whoever buys it is going to be getting. baited throughout the rest of their life. with. that dirty bait that young bait.

that cusp bait. that line between air and water. where you breathing and you drown him. and that's what scares me is that you. can't just make a purchase one day or. make a. honeymoon [ __ ] i might call it a mistake. if you buy and looks at looks at a. children.

at an 18 year old that's a mistake. but it's a legal i mean look it's in. your loins i feel it but. at my age it's a little risque. but what i worry about then is the. algorithms the. the ability of apps to then haunt you to. chase you. to say hey about this young titty you. know. oh we got a girl she was a senior.

volleyball captain. and she bout them tits now she's 18. you. know it's like. that kind of stuff because the algorithm. is going to haunt you now. whereas back in the day it was a little. different you buy something at a bakery. that everything stopped at the counter. and the only person that knew your. secret was. thick tiff back or. fat allen or whoever you know no no. shame bro no shame no shame.

so anyway i don't know exactly what i'm. saying but that's the kind of stuff that. worries me is the is the ability of. these apps to keep tabs and the ability. of that. because how many times before they keep. haunting somebody with an 18 year old. 18 year old and then you're just making. a pervert. i don't know i don't know anything man.

so but anyway that's what's going on man. um we got a lot of great calls that came. in man some special stuff and. i want to be a part of that and. and i thank you guys for being a part of. uh of just. continuing to be a part of my life over. these years. and i'm excited to get back on tour man. and uh. we had a show in dallas the other night. just a little show and man it was fun.

i went and looked at some theaters uh to. maybe shoot a netflix special over there. some beautiful places and just to be. working in a. you know in a state they're about to be. at full capacity over there and so. that's a blessing man it's exciting. and it needs to happen i think that. whatever's. in the air whatever core is out there. the disease needs to run. through us. it needs to run through us man.

that's what i think what do i know i. don't know [ __ ] i mean look at me. so i'm dressed like this i'ma tell you. this man i've been losing my hair and. you know it and i do everything i can to. reposition my hair to restructure. i will recall hair. you know i'll frickin i'll stay up all. night writing notes to my mustache. trying to convince it to move up north. two out of three men will experience. some form of hair loss by the time they. are 35 that's unbelievable. but not really it's pretty obvious if.

you look at people. someone's doing bad with their hair but. i'm here to tell you it's okay. you know more than 50 million men in the. us suffer from male pattern baldness. it's not like something you did. you know it's just that topography. you know it's that farming. but i'm going to tell you right now. there are only two fda approved. medications that can prevent hair loss. and keeps offers both that's right.

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get the plan shipped to your door for. free. go to mintmobile.com t-h-e-o. that's m-i-n-t m-o-b-i-l-e dot com slash. theo. cut your wireless bill to 15 bucks a. month at mintmobile.com. theo we got a lot of great calls that. came. in what else is new going on in my life. you know uh i got a lot to do at home. man. geez gee got a lot to do brother.

you know this is just. there's just so many you know. you need towels you need soaps you need. silverware. i got plastic plates and unfortunately i. got three things of plastic plates. because. the picture on the website looked like.

bowls but it was plates. and i think it's said bowls i think they. spelled plates with a b-o-w-l-e-s. so i'll fold the freaking plate in like. a little bowl and get my cereal in the. morning. and then they got some red robins doing. a nest outside. with eggs in it and so i don't want to. go out there and cause any harm i don't. want to affect mother nature. i got enough [ __ ] on my [ __ ] docket. at the moment so. so that's where i am with that um.

what else had some people come move. refrigerator in and they broke one of. the front steps. had the limb fall in the backyard. um you know so just regular life man. regular life [ __ ] don't have a hamper. yet so it's just. you know when you don't have a hamper. everywhere is a hamper. you know the drill boy everywhere's a. hamper. so i'm just doing that i'm living that.

life right now. and i think some of it feels a little. sad. you know it's a little sad to be uh. not sad but it's like you know it makes. you it's one of those moments where you. get in a new place and you're like okay. it's it's almost like walking up a. staircase not really up but even. sideways on a on a.

platform or something you and you the. the view is different. like okay well here i am now i'm in a. home. how do i feel what's it feel like you. know. [Music]. what other responsibilities do i need a. dog do i need. you know one of those freezers for like. catfish and beef and stuff that you keep. in the refrigerator in the in the uh. uh garage you know you just start. thinking what other adult [ __ ] do i need.

do i need a wreath on my door at. christmas you know. it's just you start thinking about a lot. of stuff like that. um adulthood you know it's a little. scary. a little scary uh but it's good it's. just a little scary. let's get the news one more time man uh. an article justice. clarence thomas and i didn't i didn't. even know his first name was justice but.

that's pretty dope justice clarence. thomas said on monday. that congress should suggest whether. laws should be updated to regulate. social media platforms. he claims social media platforms have. come to have unbridled control over. unprecedented amounts of speech. suggested the platform should be used as. common carriers such as trains and. telephone companies. both having large amounts of government. regulations.

you know i think about this a lot. because it does. seem to me that. what used to be people just talking now. the the place where you talk. is now social media that has become the. the communication environment. and i guess people could debate and say. well no you could just talk to your. neighbors or talk to some. but you can but that's not really what.

goes on anymore. you know most talking or communicating. is done now. online whereas it used to be. you had to go and see. something live there's now so much more. accessibility to. communication online most accessibility. to communication is online. um. and i i guess.

i feel like people should be able to say. whatever they want. because it's almost like. the companies have become like the. microphone so everybody has a microphone. now and the companies have owned the. microphone. where they can't own your actual voice. but they own. the thing your voice goes through to. reach others you know. that spigot. and and yeah.

it i feel like it should be regulated. somehow. you hate to have the government involved. but. at the same time because you want like. free speech but. if the way we speak is now goes through. a filter. and that filter has judgment or. jurisdiction over what is okay to say. then that seems. very dangerous.

because now speech doesn't feel free it. feels very specific. like you're allowed to say things but. not these things. and i'd love to know what some of you. guys think on that you know. if you could hit the hotline. 985-664-9503. um yeah you know i. i just because i feel like a lot of.

things yeah they're just not allowed to. be shared and. uh not allowed to be said online things. get labeled. um things get labeled and then taken. down. so that just feels alarming at least let. people decide. what they want to hear or believe. but everyone should have the ability to. share i feel like. i feel like and i'm open to uh.

to hear different people's thoughts on. that. because maybe also it's just our. responsibility. to be like oh well this platform isn't. uh. doesn't allow everything to be shared. and i think most people know that. but i don't know. just a lot there man there's a lot in. that little cauldron. so if you want to stir that thing hit. the hotline 985-664-9503. um what else do we have here we got a.

call that came in from. skyler what's up theo this is uh my. name's skyler i'm out of the deep north. up here in. california humboldt county hey. scholar thank you for calling up there. from humboldt county you know my friend. went to school up there and he actually. died but. uh beautiful fella and his uh birth date. has passed my friend ryan thomas and. i hope he knows that i love him in. heaven baby uh gang baby onward. uh thank you for calling brother uh.

i had a question for you my girlfriend. she's. we've been going on three years now just. about and she's. got this opportunity to do 80 days. backpacking food kayaking out in new. zealand. uh just been kind of thinking about it a. lot it's kind of a long time away. uh just wondering what's your thoughts. on how i can handle that. and yeah man i love your podcast looking. through it every day.

doing drywall and painting and you get. me through that [ __ ] so. appreciate you thank you a lot later. gang brother yen i mean drywall is. really. everybody knows you're halfway to doing. drugs. and so i wish you well brother and um. you know your girlfriend got the. opportunity to have an experience. and uh i appreciate you karen for even.

what i think about it. i just i would suggest that you just let. her do it and try to find ways to just. be as supportive as you can. you know let her go have an experience. now you hope she doesn't really get real. indigenous out there. you know and she's you know out there. making you know. meets a sherpa or something like that. and they're. you know starting a little swiss family. robinson or something but that's.

probably not going to happen man. people's hiking is dangerous people die. and uh you know it's hard to get erect. when everybody when people have fever. when their people are hungry and uh. altitude all of that there's a lot of. factors that are gonna really. probably keep the man off of her but i. think the biggest thing man is just to. love her and just do you would do what. you can to love her and just. yeah send her out on the wall send her. out on the wall on the way and be. supportive. you know get her a nice compass or get. her a nice uh.

you know something that when she looks. for direction or thinks about direction. that she thinks about you. you know because that's gonna i think. really then you're gonna get into the. entrails of her thoughts and of her. feelings like oh man. the real direction i need in my life is. that fella right there. um but yeah it's tough because you don't. want to hold somebody back from an. opportunity but. at the same time you want to hold. somebody.

and that's a real tricky biscuit man. that's air in water man that's aaron. water. um let's hear right here aaron rodgers. speaking of air. uh aaron rodgers on jeopardy. a question came in on aaron rodgers. somebody asked him. this was interesting over to our two-day. champion on the end. scott did you come up the correct.

response who wanted to kick that field. goal. that is a great question should be. should be correct. but uh unfortunately for this uh this. game today that's incorrect. and you're going to lose and a man asked. him on there aaron rodgers famously. they didn't make the the super bowl. because they uh well who knows if. that's why but they they chose to kick a. figal instead of go for it.

um and so a guy asked him that on. jeopardy when he was hosting jeopardy. aaron rodgers has the most punchable. face i think i've ever seen really. there's just it's just so punchable. um but yeah i think that was great man. i love it when somebody hit somebody. with the surprise with that rare element. you know you hit him with that plutonium. or that egregious bro when you shocked.

the table bro and hit him with that. periodic [ __ ] uniqueness dog gang. so that's a good question who wanted to. kick that field goal who knows man. ah what else do we have man. we got a lot of uh. calls that came in let's do one right. here that came in. hey theo what's going on bro my name is. brad i'm coming to you from. gaylord michigan big bread.

and that's a rare name man that's the. carbohydrate hitter baby big bread let's. hear it. um i just got two questions for you here. the first one is so i'm going to stop. i'm 22 years old and i'm going to. stop smoking weed on monday here sure. you are bread let's hear more bud. um i know you used to be addicted to. them cigarettes. so i'm just curious on what you would do. to kind of keep your mind off that.

and to like not reach for one oh yeah. man stay away from that weed because. that weed is a nice. it's like a pillow but you put it's like. a it's like putting your head on a. pillow but the pillow's inside your head. i think i would probably do some fitness. too i think doing fitness it's like it's. hard to go for a jog i feel like and. then want to get stoned. i feel like if you activate the other. side of. you um that physical side maybe it'll uh.

it'll just keep your pump up and you'll. feel so good off them endorphins you. won't want to get. playing it out but those are my thoughts. you know i don't know. you might want to smoke weed forever. also. you might want to do it and just not. tell your friends you might want to. you know you could try dmt you know that. could help you quit. that's what it got me to quit cigarettes. you know when i still. actually i don't man i it took the real.

desire to have that. that hit out of me. because that's the thing about smoking. weed i want us i want to suck on that. thing bro. i want to suck on that grassy grassy. knob. daddy you know what i'm saying that. giant. i want to [ __ ] tickle my lungs with. that [ __ ] soft little field stick. baby that junk. so.

i wasn't good at them johns man a lot of. brothers are better at smoking weed i. think than whites. praise god man and. you know i seen a mailman the other day. smoke or male woman i'm not sure. it was a man or woman and they were. urban you know and they was smoking a. giant. and i didn't [ __ ] say nothing you. know what i'm saying bro like. you know what i'm saying you can't you. can't say anything anymore so you just. kind of pray for him and just don't use.

the postal system anymore. you know it's almost getting back to. days you just take a letter to somebody. if you need to get it to them. but uh but anyway what else you got bub. also i got me and four buddies coming to. uh. making a road trip down to nashville. tennessee. and i'm just curious if you have any. input on what we should do we're staying. right on broadway there. i don't know we don't know if we should. pull up with some cowboy boots and a. cowboy.

hat just curious if you could tell me. how it's looking down there. well look it's open it's open carry as. well i think it's an open carry states. you could glock up. i think they just opened that up and um. you know it's the central east man so. it's all types of people broadway does. have a real country vibe to it. but there's all types around here. there's all types around here and it's. um you know it's a tourist destination. uh i think find some things to do that.

are outside of just right in the city i. mean unless you guys are just looking to. rage. if that's the case if y'all was looking. to shed some skin bruh. and just dick out or whatever they call. it you know. or just touch titty or whatever then. you'll be fine but. if you want more than that then you'll. probably need to talk to a concierge or. look at a um. you know like a family or something and. find other stuff to do. my favorite thing to do is just drive.

out to the countryside you know just. take a cruise out somewhere but. that's not always the thing you're. looking to do when you and your buddies. are just trying to get bent out. you know and try and try to make sure. everybody's straight that's the thing as. you get older and you go get wasted with. a bunch of friends it's really. you just got you know that's how you. find that's how you just make sure that. everybody's straight in the cl. so what else man i know that this story. came in right here. and this is a news story.

man dies in. taco eating contest. family file suit a california man choked. and died during an amateur taco eating. contest at a minor league baseball game. the son of the man is suing the events. organizers for negligence. the president of the league declined to. give a statement. you know.

there's a lot worse ways to go man. there's a lot worse ways to go than with. half a taco in you. and these days nobody wants to have any. accountability no matter what it is. you know everyone everybody wants to. hashtag taco tuesday and. you know nom nom nom nom. but they can't back it up in the streets. they get out there. on them taquitos or them beef.

quesadillas. and they can't back it up bye. so i think in this case you almost got. to let bygones be bygones man. unless they use that t-shirt cannon and. shot it down your boy's gullet. i mean it's highly unfortunate. you know it's first of all it's. extremely unfortunate to even have. people. know that you were at a minor league. baseball game.

and then that you never left. because you're with the lord now and you. got taco'd out. i mean it's heartbreaking man and uh. and i feel for the family and i feel for. the fella that went down. on that uh on that entree. but i don't know if a lawsuit helps. it's just gonna you know it's gonna. [ __ ] the team the team will be done.

so. maybe see if you could sue to have to. change the name. you know sue to see if you could change. the name to something in memoriam of. your son. that might be kind of nice uh. at least that way there's going to be a. piece of him still alive you know. in a special way that will because other. people are going to go to the games and. find joy.

but but i'm sorry man r.i.p bro praise. god bro. so oh. man i'm tired today it's been a long. couple of uh. you know i was out of town for like a. week. went to l.a then went to easter and um. and it's good man you know it's good man. uh what else we got. a a video that came in right here.

let's take a peek it's a young fellow. down syndrome. and you know i beat it and this. beautiful fellow right here this toddler. he's playing football.

oh. beautiful man this fella for the wild. cats. and he has down syndrome and he played. for the wildcats and uh. and they let them run in for the score. you know and that kind of stuff is sweet. man it's beautiful to see it's beautiful. to see the little fella.

getting out there getting into the end. zone feeling that just that. fire you know because so many people. don't get to feel like camaraderie. i do think though that somebody towards. the end of the thing should have lit him. up a little bit. you know have a brother at least a mixed. dude. fly in and just right as he crosses the. goal line crack him a little. just to really.

because that's how you learn man going. through the fire. you could let anybody just run across. the track you get a good. feeling i'm sure it's uplifting. but knowing that you got laid down by a. mix dude right at the end. i think that that makes it even doper if. he shows it to his friends or. when he watches it back you know.

it gives it that vit troll. so i know the fellas already got that ds. on them and i wish they you know. you know i feel like they just should. have. had a brother crack him down at the end. or. just somebody and not like hurt him. you're not trying to hurt the guy. you know he's already got his thing. going on but. you want i just feel like you want him. to feel feel the whole vibe of the game.

but i don't know you know and that's. just my take on it man. and i probably shouldn't be allowed to. have takes on things but. what else do we have here man uh. let's do one or two more. and first i want to let you know also. that um. you should know that the dick pills are. good. they're good man you know your penis is.

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all right. here's a call that came in right here. what's up dio my name is nate i'm. from new york i'm 26 years old and i. suffer from pretty severe anxiety. okay nate anxious nate baby. that rattler dog you got that rattle in. you. yes sir let's hear more.

and i know you take antidepressants and. and. you're quite open about it and i'm. really nervous to um. inquire about it i'm nervous that i'll. lose my edge i'll lose my personality. i'm uh i'm an artist and i'm nervous. that'll zap my creativity. but uh i most certainly see that it has. not exactly yours. um so i was just wondering if you could. give me any advice. i appreciate your honesty man thank you. for everything.

peace out gang gang gang nathaniel and. thank you. thank you for reaching out man and just. checking in with us and and for sharing. that you got your own anxiety meds. i mean they're pushing meds dude if you. look at commercials. one out of three commercials is for meds. there's only like nine companies anymore. and one out of three commercials is for. meds man it's intense out there and so. you. everybody's on something or hell the.

other day i unzipped my pants my penis. was taking a pill i didn't. i didn't have anything to do with it. everything's pilling out. you know you'll find a dang pill in yeah. you know it's like that people's peeled. out. everybody's on something but um. you know the anti-anxiety me yeah i've. taken them all man. zoloft but i would call zoloft. no loft because i couldn't get that. erect. you know they really have i was really.

sponged out in that wing baby you know. it. so the hard part is keeping your penis. full. because the crazy part is your brain i. feel like will get happier. on the anti-anxiety meds your brain will. get better off. you just don't care about things as much. you see a squirrel gets shot or. something. you do you you feel bad but you don't. feel bad you just.

know you feel bad. something sad happens you you get. sad but you don't get that sad you just. kind of know. that you feel sad. so it kind of you know like when you. went bowling as a child. and they had them bumper bowlings on. it's like that. but for feelings just puts the bumpers. on man.

and sometimes i want the bumpers off i. want the full throttle. i want that dirty monty you know. i want that nast and ass damn i want all. the feelings. so that's the trade-off you don't get. the highs and you don't get the lows you. get a whole lot of harsh. mediums good and bad. so sometimes i wish i could quit and now.

i can't quit. i quit for a few days and i spiral a. little. and i don't even know if it's placebo or. if it's real. but i quit for a few days and i then i. get real scared. one bad thing happens and i think you. know i start feeling some type of way. and. then i feel like everything's going to. be bad and i have to get right back on. it. and it's crazy to me that a you know. something that i went in for 20 years. ago.

they gave me this pill and i'm still. taking it that's. that's wild it feels not right like if. you. broke your arm and they put a cast on it. 20 years ago if you still had the cast. on. it seems like they'd have some way to. get you off the cast. and that's the thing about it it's more. like getting. i don't know it's like an eternal thing. but don't feel bad about it a lot of.

people are on it. i would just kind of monitor how you are. on it. and then make an educated guess for. yourself. you know these are unique times and. these are metted up times. and uh just know you're not alone man. and and and people love talking about it. hell you flash a fluoxetine or a damn. um what is that other one called it's uh. wellbutrin at a bar.

i mean look [ __ ] love butrin i've. seen those shirts before. so so it's possible to really find joy. even on. on the pills and everything so. um. oh man my back hurts something always. hurts jesus man. getting old your [ __ ] body [ __ ]. was hard it's hard man.

and i gotta pee all the time i start to. feel like i'm just carrying pee around i. feel like a camel. more than a person like oh here's some. more p here's some p. here's some peepee. matter of fact i'm a pee before this. last uh call. all right you know i'm.

lucky to have a job i gotta remember. that i've been making a lot of gratitude. lists recently and that's been. helping me keep my mind in a good spot. you know because the world is weird the. world is always gonna be weird. and really our world is better than a. lot of people have ever had it. and uh and i believe that. and um i gotta take care of.

my space and my brain space you know. i be be careful where i set my brain and. where i set my attention and where i set. my. sponge. because you'll absorb man. let's take another call that came in. here man uh. here we go. hey this is jordan not in denver.

colorado. hey jordan thank you for the call man. you sound like my friend uh. john who's a friend of mine that used to. work for uh. j.p picone i think they did construction. or something. i think he's still alive but not. definite let's hear more brother thank. you for calling jordan sorry. uh been a long time listening to your. podcast. i work by myself every day so i. have you in my ear most days and you.

help me. get through and make me laugh and uh to. make the workday that much. easier um well thank you man i. appreciate that. you know uh you make my work day easier. by being. on the phone here and just uh chiming in. so thank you for. um for checking in man gang homework. i was just calling my uh my little. brother. a couple years younger than me he just. graduated from uh. physical therapy school and he's.

supposed to get his. license and you know go start off on. that career and. uh lately you know alcohol has gotten. the better of him and. you know his addiction is is winning out. over. over that you know potentially new. exciting career and. um you know he just he had about six. weeks over. um and relapsed this past thursday. and he's just been deep in it and uh.

you know you can he just he doesn't want. to live you know he wants to drink. himself to death. and be left alone to do it and uh. i don't know how to reach him man so. any advice you might have for me uh. you know i i know you know so much about. this kind of thing and. you know listen you talk to other. callers on the podcast and. so if you have anything you can give me. if you have time to. shout out to him um and just let him.

know that. you know he's worthy that he's okay. i appreciate it gang bro thank you man. thank you for calling. uh you know thank you for caring about. your brother you know thank you for. putting that into the world. um. man it's hard it's hard to watch. somebody we care about struggle bro it's. hard.

you know it's hard when we can't see. uh when we can't feel how much people. care. i think that's a common problem with. people that struggle. is they can't feel the care for some. reason they just can't feel it they just. don't. their antennas their and heart antennas. are not very long. and they have a short memory their heart.

has a short memory. that's literally what it feels it feels. like sometimes like my heart just has. such a short memory. and i don't want it to it's not a choice. it's a defect. um but man. thank you for just reminding me of what. it's like to care about a brother. uh thank you for just sharing like you. know um. for sharing that it just hearing you you. know.

just call you care about your brother. you want him to be okay. you know um. [Music]. yeah and if i had a message for him i. would just say hey man you know uh. i wish you didn't feel so bad. you know i really really wish you didn't. feel so bad. and i bet you're probably hurt in a. place that you can't even access.

and i bet you want people to see how. much you hurt but you just. no matter you feel like maybe no matter. what you do it's not going to show them. and yeah i just want you to know that uh. that.

that there's a possibility for things to. get better there there. there's ways for you to feel better and. i know it may not feel like that's. possible. um but but there really are. this year has been hard this life has. been hard in some ways in. in emotional ways. you know living is a hard thing to do. it's an un it's a job that you never. signed up for.

it's like suddenly you're like nine. years old you're like holy [ __ ] i. work at fedex like i don't know. it's a shock a lot of times um. but i'm sorry that your brother's having. such a tough time man and i'm sorry that. you're having a tough time too. you know i've had siblings that have. struggled and uh. and i've gotten message from people who. know that i struggle and it's just it's. you know i know it's so hard for people. to watch other people have go through.

a tough time and you know i wish your. brother knew how much so that we wanted. him here. because if he's deep enough to feel all. that pain bro if there's that much depth. in him. then there's that much depth in him for. joy as well. you know there's not many people in the. world that god kind of lets walk through. that. that depth of pain man.

so for him to if for him if he could get. through it and to be able to then. help others dang it's like talking to. christopher columbus bro. it's like talking to that emotional. magellan you know they've been on those. high seas. it's just a lot of uh. it's almost like going outer space man. but like inside yourself you know it's. um.

that discomfort. that pain and wanting to detach from it. and wanting to detach from the world. i used to think so i was like that oh. i'm gonna hurt i'm gonna do you know. you're gonna watch me. suffer world you know. because you did this to me world you're. gonna watch what i'm gonna do now. i'm not even gonna take care of myself. you know that kind of thing.

and um. yes i don't know man. i've been having a tough time recently. kind of connecting with some of my own. feelings but. um but i'll hit you up man i'll i'll say. hey to you off the show and uh. and see what's going on but. we love you dog and we love your brother. and. you know it's uh we.

i just commend you for taking different. avenues to try and show him that you. care. man it's so hard if if somebody really. is an alcoholic it's so hard for them to. know that people care it's just. it's just hard man. they just you know we can be in such. denial sometimes i'll be standing in. cotton.

and i just won't believe it soft man. you know i just want to have such. control over everything it's just. anyway i'm kind of rambling man and i. don't mean to be separating from uh. from your call uh but. it's been a long week for me and uh. and i'll reach out to you man and say. hello but uh but thank you for calling.

just even putting. your brother on our on our minds and. hearts for a minute bro. you know we need it in the world we need. to be thinking about one another. you know. because it's [ __ ] cool it feels good. man. you know somebody cares god that feels. good. when that arrow of love comes from. somebody and it goes. it somehow makes its way through that uh. kaleidoscope of [ __ ] and it just. and it man.

and it's getting rarer and rare baby we. out here [ __ ] firing. in matches so gang man thank you for. calling in man. and uh be good to yourself dude. you deserve it um yeah if you have any. suggestions too for uh. for jordan right there that could um you. know. i mean i know we can you know we could. suggest 12 step which is stuff we know.

it works but if you have any other. suggestions feel free to hit the hotline. i want to say happy belated birthday to. uh sean dugan. who helps out here in the central east. and he's a young fella and. you know he's always battling the dark. arts but he. he carries a strong sword and what else. man. that's it really that's it. um did i see it. you know uh you guys be good to.

yourselves man take care of yourself. and um and take care of each other. you know we got this [ __ ] man i hate to. be preachy i feel like i sound so. preachy right now. my [ __ ] back hurts dog i feel like. somebody wish somebody would [ __ ]. shoot me in the back with a damn. ibuprofen gun. oh that feels so good wouldn't it feel. so good if somebody just came up on the. street. and just pop up but it was like tore it. all i'm like oh.

let's go out the way that we came in man. we all need that dip we all need that. restart. we all need that man gang. just baptize me by robert randolph and. the family bank.

i need redemption. i'm lost in the blood.

thank you please.

[Music]. what else can i see yo baby. damn got it wrong with him baby let's go.

[Applause]. though.

i'm a brand new man baby. [Music]. and there he is right there robert. randolph and the family band.

baptize me. grateful to listen to that tune today. you guys be good to yourselves man you. deserve it. you.