Albuquerque | This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #396

all right. if it is it is baby that's what they say. sometimes. you know. i used to go to the water park by my. house growing up. and it wasn't real close to us but it. was. you know close enough. you couldn't go barefoot over there you. had to put on shoes that's how far away. it was. and we go to the water park and uh.

wasn't i mean it wasn't much of a place. you know the biggest attractions out. there they had um. a water slide. and they had uh. allegedly they had the coldest root beer. in the area. you'd go in there and people be like it. ain't that cold i can handle it you know. you know people drive down from the. north you know from canada and. saskatchewan.

you know michigan. they drive down i can handle this i can. handle it. and they drive down there and i remember. you go in the general store over there. at that water park. it's called lando pines. and um you'd go in the general store. there and man it was when you even. opened the door to that general store it. was frosty in there. you see the polar express go by in the.

distance. [Music]. and you get in there and you'd be. barefoot cause you just come from the um. you just come from the water slide in. the pool. and you'd be barefoot rocking around in. there and it's so cold. i remember as a child trying to get back. close to the uh cooler where that root. beer was. and i remember hugging that you'd hug.

anybody was in here help me. i remember there was an old woman by the. baked beans one time and i just damn got. right up in between her legs for a. minute honestly. just trying to get to that root bear. and you'd get finally you get back near. the thing and you'd have you. two or three of us kids pulling on that. root beer on the. uh. the cage it was in it was in like a big. cage. big glass cage a big aquarium.

you know because it was just you were so. powerful and so cold. and you'd have to pull on that door and. get your little buddy help me terrence. help. help terrence. and a little daniel be over there on the. other he'd be pushing against the damn. door he thought he was helping and he's. over there just you know. he's leaning on that bat like that come. on man. and finally you get it open you get that. door open.

santa come walking out that [ __ ] i mean. it had been. you know. it was cold in there. santa come out you'd have a damn uh. um. you know a little uh. a damn penguin come walking out that. [ __ ]. and he'd been in there looking at. pornography and you're like damn how do. you know. how can he even touch himself he just. got them two rudders on him he don't.

even have he can't grip nothing but he. was doing it anyway you could see the. shame on his face. but he'd get that the. glass door open and all these root beers. would be sitting there. you could barely see it was so cold. just fiercely coldness is coming at you. and the lady at the counter was like. close the door. and you grabbed one dude he took all the. energy you had inside just to grab one.

and lock onto that. can. and you da at that moment you damned the. makers of the root beer. because why they put it in this cold the. can is cold. and you got and then you bounce that. thing all the way up to the register you. and your friend. tossing it to each other. you set it on the desk. on the counter.

and that lady would be like you know. 65 cents. and mommy giving you a little bit of. money. and you put your money up there and you. get it. and you walk out of there man and. just out into the distance. out into that just they're back into the. world the warm world. and you'd gone on an adventure you've.

gone and you'd read you've gotten. something. you've gotten a piece of dang you've. gotten you a thing you'd gotten uh. you'd had a journey. getting that and then just so cold. and then you couldn't take your hands. off the can armor one time my hands got. stuck to the can. damn all day just. you know i look like a you know like one. of those guys outside of. a uh. of a macy's or something at christmas. you know trying to you know beg for. money shaking that can.

you know i couldn't he just couldn't get. my hands off of the can i couldn't un. can my hands sure. those are the days man that's what i. miss about summer i miss going over. there orlando pines. and you'd want and sometimes they had. red root beer it was this barks root. beer and it was red red and you'd sip. that and make your lips all red and. pretty. and you'd wander right into that you. know. they had a lot of weird.

perverts out there baby pedophiles out. there living out there barbecuing. you'd see a guy in the distance out. there you know. putting damn lotion on his arms and. grilling up a couple of. um. johnson's brats. like damn what's he you know a game he. had a family. you know and just. putting cologne on you'd see a man. putting cologne on by himself and. grilling wieners and grilling franks god.

but those are the days man i miss that. about summer i miss that about being a. child when everything was an adventure. those days of even just being out there. at lando pines water park. and walking into that cooler. getting you a cold root beer. [Music]. you know everything when you're young. everything was an adventure. and i miss that. you know i do.

let's get into it. come on baby. we gonna make it guys. we gonna make it. i'm gonna make it. so are you i'm gonna come up. yeah. [Music].

well. [Music]. well i just moved up to lucky street. when. [Music].

between you and me we got so much love. and in chemistry. [Music]. well good things keep on coming. [Music]. wow right there. and that's 89 volt.

and they're singing the come up. you know and that's what you hat you. have to you have to believe that you're. on the come up that's a big thing. believing that there's something that. you are on a. on a on a forward turn. that you're on a that your projection. overall. is upward you got to believe that. you got to believe that.

i hope you do. if you're feeling like you don't i hope. you i'll be able to just to remodel that. and don't listen to yourself for a. second and listen to me and let me tell. you. that you are. on the come up. you are. you are whatever you're going through or. dealing with or been dealt with. you know you playing blackjack with the. with the devil baby that's a life is. just you sitting right there hit me hit. me hit me. you know.

and then bust damn. you know it's just so whatever you've. been dealt or you whatever you dealing. with just. slow the game down. look for the waitress order or water. you're gonna be fine. you're gonna be fine. um. man i uh oh i got to go see hank. williams jr last night. out here in the central east baby and if.

you haven't seen this man. you know thunder head baby you know what. i'm talking about. this man he's a real rosta bout you know. he's a real uh. he's a real. he's like a like a. hmm. he's a. i mean he is just a damn super honky. that's what he is baby he's a real he's.

got. i mean he's got music he's got music. built into him. you know. you pat him on the back a damn ballad. will come out of him. i bet when they burped him as a baby i. better you know a couple of b-flats fell. right off his tongue. i mean that felt he just he's got this. gumption in him. and a lot of you guys know who he is you. know he you know he's a legend. he's a legendary.

and he's legend non-dairy he's like you. know he's he's he's probably also a. lactose free legend. because i don't know if legendary is. i don't know what that. i don't know if that's. cheese based or what it is. but he is um. he's a whisper he's this whispery. whiskey. whisker. cat.

he's this. he's kind of this fat cat that that's. never been neutered kind of you know he. just. it was interesting to watch him. it was really interesting to watch him. um. i've gotten to know some of his family. over the years. uh. mildly. you know just by acquaintance and uh. anyway i got to go see him play live and. that was. uh that was quite a treat him and uh dan. auerbach. from the black keys were over there.

and a lot of other beautiful women and. men i think. and somebody else was on stage they. could i think it was a woman or man it. could have been a man could have been a. thicker woman. not sure the angle i was at you know i. don't know but anyway. beautiful music. and uh and just a good time. and also i'll tell you what else i got. to see. i got to see you guys. i got to see you guys uh. went out to albuquerque over there i. haven't talked to you since that.

alba care care. somebody's like say welcome to about. it's like how many casts are in abaca. i said man i'm happy to be here i said. he goes where and i said and they trick. you because they want to hear you say it. because they know you can't say it well. because nobody can because they can't. also. then the man said. i said i'm happy to be here the guy goes.

where and i was like albert. yeah. albert. hey kitty. and the guy's like oh you mean alba. can't get cat cat kick cat. this uh the whole day. they don't even. if you look at it on the map it says. a-l-b-e-r-k. k-k-k-k-k and then has a bunch of just. dots. like what is it. one of the cues has a line going over.

the top of it. you know like unlimited cues or whatever. damn you know. and one of the cues if you look real. close you can see him over there. carrying a couple other little cues on. his little. you know his little hip or whatever that. thing is a little goiter whatever cues. have on him. but damn it an albuquerque. that place is. that place is insane bro. i never seen anything like that bro.

i know that people thank you first of. all for coming out. the show was good that that one was it. was a little tough in that venue i felt. like but it was good. um. and i was just so grateful i mean people. came out they got babysitters they drove. they made this effort. and they came to see me man and that's. what i'm saying thank you. thank you. thank you for that support. and i mean they had dang uh.

[Music]. everybody people like dude they got. aliens man they got aliens bro. they have levatos that they got like. area uh quinceanos out there. hey dog. you believe in area quincy uno. like what. yeah don't you know what i'm talking. about. ailing is papa. like what though. like que paso pero. oh dawg i'm talking about aliens don't.

you like area 51 though you know what. i'm talking about area. and i have a ticket. bro i [ __ ] and dude the crazy part is. everybody there is talking about aliens. and the aliens are the people bro. we went into the um. we went to a love's gas station because. everything shuts down and now be. hey. at probably about midnight. or probably 10 p.m.

bro. we had to walk. because one of the ubers said the. command said i ain't coming over there. like all right [ __ ] my all right. you know we'll figure it out we'll do. old-fashioned. so we walked you know the original ubers. baby and i'm talking about feet and. kneecaps baby. that freaking ligament that them you. know. them little ligament uh. you know them bangers baby them lifters. legs. i was like all right we'll use these. [ __ ]. and uh so we start walking.

first guy we see has a. sword. okay that's wild guy had a sword on him. he was a grown man too. and we just didn't want to kind of he. was he was a lot he was walking around. but you could tell he was asleep. so he's one of those sleep swords. so it was just one of those he's almost. like one of those like on a game on a. video game if you don't get close to. them they don't know you're there kind. of he was like yeah so like all right. let's just maneuver around.

um this little guardian. of the uh greyhound he was basically. guarding a greyhound station. um but anyway what was i talking about. oh albuquerque yeah but everybody there. they talk about the alien but the aliens. are they are amongst the people they're. so mixed in. and we went to a gas station and this. guy in there was just walking like. just like. he moved like his head he kept moving. his arms up above his heads while he. walked like oh dawg i'm looking for.

some rolos. i'm looking for what you might call it. and everybody there had a parole officer. with them. and that blew my mind. but that's solid police work. and um. and thank you that was that was great. man. over there and they have like hey yeah. that was great we saw that uh. what else happened man. um.

yeah i try to do meet and greets after. the shows in most of the city i try to. pop out and say hey if i have the energy. for it um. and we made it over there through uh. midland and lubbock. and we made it over there through um. where else were we. dallas. beautiful man. you know thank you all to texas and then. we you know. this fast week we made it through. georgia and over there at alabama and uh. but what else happened oh oh also in. albuquerque they're like dog you got to.

try the chili's dog have you had the. green chilies. dude somebody. that place is crazy dude uh. i went. i went to like this meeting there um. [Music]. you know i got 51 days sober right now. so. that's where i'm at and uh. i'm feeling very grateful for that. uh. and so i went to this me and the other. dude i know you're not supposed to talk.

about what happens in meetings that's. fine i was at a meeting once then i'll. say it like this and it was just me and. someone else and the man. was hitting on me bro in there. like dude i'm trying to get sober dog. not gayed out. you know so it was just like dang bro. you gotta watch that stuff. so uh. if you're at a meeting and a guy takes. his shoes off dude. and um he started doing that cat's.

cradle thing with his shoelaces he took. them out of his shoes and was doing. cat's cradle with them. i'm like god you know but um. but an abba. kiki. they always want you to try the green. chilies. people are like dawg my cousin got. attacked by two guys with um. lightsabers you know. but. have you had the green chilis like.

that's all it is there. it's like man my friend got run over by. a volkswagen. but. um but have you had the green chilies. people like dude man uh my uh you know. my wife fell off a building last week. and it was. you know nobody knows what happened i. was up there with her and. we got an argument and she went off the. edge and uh. and damn have you had the green chilies. man because they are good.

so it's just that kind of place it's. that green chili belt over there and. look i will say this they are good. everybody in albuquerque. seem like they are waiting for a. greyhound bus even if they're not at a. greyhound station. i feel like everybody has luggage. um. yeah. everybody like has a ticket like i'm. waiting for the train. and they're just there's not even near. any tracks it just is a unique area.

you know even birds are like man [ __ ]. dawg. what the [ __ ] is happening here. um. but i'll say this to people that came. out beautiful folks. and uh. and thank you guys for having me man i. really appreciate it then we made it. through lubbock and midland and over to. dallas and that was amazing and then uh. um. what else oh we went to savannah georgia. we got a lot more things talking about a. lot of great calls came in man.

um. and i'm feeling good. [Music]. and i'm feeling good and i want to thank. you guys for your support. um i want to let you know that oh i will. be in florida. in two weeks you know you can see me. over there. on june 23rd hollywood florida june 24. fort myers. florida june 25 daytona beach florida. and june 26 lakeland. florida. um.

yeah and also want to let you know that. we have um. the nba championships are going on. you know it's dallas and golden state. and uh you can join the finals action. with draftkings sports book. they're an official sponsor. uh official sports betting partner of. the nba. new customers can make any five dollar. mba bet and get 150. in free bets instantly wow that's.

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minimum asian elitability restrictions. applies his show for details. um. and we uh. we have notes a disclaimer for that in. the uh episode of the show and the. show's notes and also if you have a. gambling addiction or something like. that then i recommend that you do not. gamble and that you reach out for. help what else. oh i want to say protein powder can be. intimidating. you know sometimes you open up a can and.

you hear guys in there and they're you. know. they're they have baseball bats and. they're really you know they're talking. smack and stuff and you're like oh this. protein powder sounds is intense. um but the fact is we all need protein a. great percentage of your body is protein. think about that. look at an animal. touch it. what's that protein mostly. it's not just about muscles protein. helps support. bone health. and satia and satiety it's a tidy.

and as we go through life protein needs. change so it's important to choose a mix. for different life stages rituals. rituals essential protein is the. delicious plant-based protein powder. with three distinct formulas designed to. meet the body's changing protein needs i. like this plant protein man i like plant. protein. they have the daily shake 50 plus which. adds calcium hmb to the mix helping to. build and maintain muscle mass for. healthy active aging if you are aging.

calon. they have daily shake pregnancy and. postpartum. if you have a baby uh or your pregnancy. or lactation this sh this this stuff. will bounce you up get you ready rock. you feed that baby with that dang milk. rocket. so the ritual difference uh. one-of-a-kind visible supply chain you. know what how and why of every labeled. ingredient. they even offer a money-back guarantee. for not 100 in love there you go tpw. listeners get 10 off with your first.

three months at. dot com slash t-h-e-o. visit ritual dot com slash theo today. for ten percent off your first three. months thank you for supporting the. podcast. and just thank you guys for coming out. man just seeing everybody's faces. getting to shake hands with people. um. and. just to be in the same room you know uh. i wish i could just spend the hour just. get off the stage and walk around and. give a damn hug to everyone. um. but.

uh. but we did what we could. and thanked everybody that came out. where else. what else can we talk about here um oh. the bus broke down that bastard now. that thing had some i mean it was. i mean that thing it looked like it had. it was just made out of dang uh. you know like um. it would look like it would just have. that dirty diaper vibe from the jump. it was uh.

i know there was a pair of um. men's boots small men's boots under my. bed. and it was interesting i thought there. was children's boots when i saw him i. said this is children's boots and. it's a little creepy to have children's. boots under your bed on a bus that's you. know strange. and the bedding looked like they had. just beaten it out of clint eastwood. like somebody tied it up and they just. punched him so many times that a damn. you know bedroom set popped right out of. his. skull.

it was just had her old you know older. motif kind of uh western. kind of. you know uh kind of like somebody. you know. so i don't know you could i bet it felt. like something bad had happened to. native americans in the area of the. blanket that's what it felt like if it. was an old blanket. anyway they had children's boots under. the bed but on the back of the. children's boot it said men's on it. and that's when you got to really.

question what's going on. when somebody's writing men's. on the back of a children's boot. so. so anyway what else do we have man um. a lot of people came out. people with damn tits people one leg no. leg half. dude came out half a head dude came out. no teeth bro lost all his teeth he said. for two years he's had no teeth.

and um. beautiful. beautiful dude i don't know what he also. he started saying something else i had. no idea what he said because the teeth. help a little when you word now but that. fella came out a couple people with wet. hands came out i remember that. um. somebody oh people left gifts. a lot of nice things this and that. um and then we hit also uh. some other places out there savannah. uh. and.

um. augusta georgia. and that play i mean some of these town. you get out i mean augustine there's. nothing downtown. they're not even a goat you can't even. they don't even do uh. montgomery we went to alabama. you know um that's rosa parks country. over there. and rosadom park somewhere else because. there's nobody downtown there either. that place i mean they didn't even have. ghosts even the ghosts are gone they. used to do ghost tours and now i thought. so i think that ghost tours closed.

even the ghosts. have left. and that's when it's. you know when not only do humans leave. but then even the spirit you know. you know that there's a there's a bus. full of you know just realms and. and ghosts. leaving town. i'd love to see the cops pull that bus. over. just stops and just know the. license registration there's just. nothing to sit in there.

[Music]. okay. um. but yeah man just great shows thank you. to everybody that came out a lot of. great energy just beautiful folks and. uh i wish i'd gotten this hey today to. everyone in person but just a lot of. kind messages and and things that i did. hear from people and so thank you. uh what else man. um oh my boy ty ernie came out growing. up this fellow he grew up named tight. ernie. and he was tight boy his body was just.

damn i mean just condensed like a damn. twix bro. you know his spine was real narrow. you know like one of those kind of fat. orange extension cords that [ __ ] was. real. i mean it was a just a. you know it was just a. you know it was that. it was a. it was a lean portal he had on him he. was just real his whole body was tight. and condensed you know. um if he lifted his right arm you know.

to shake your hand his left leg would go. up. he was just his whole body was just real. condensed like that. and uh they call him tight ernie baby. and he's you know he could hear i mean. it sounded when he his windpipe was. tight. he was you know he had that tight pipe. on him. and when he talked it was. hey. [Music].

[Music]. i mean like his daddy had just damn. [ __ ] a flute. you know what i'm talking about somebody. in that family you know. got a little uh. risque with a um. what is it with a woodwind you know what. i'm saying you know somebody definitely. somebody was. somebody was putting wood into a. woodwind baby in that family because. that dude [ __ ] damn boy. and i grew up with that fella man so.

it's just crazy to see him. some folks brought him out because he. can't drive he can't handle that. steering wheel. you know watching him drive it's like if. you see somebody put one of those the. club they used to put the club on their. car. on the steering wheel somebody steal it. that's like watching him drive he's just. so tight and concise. you know he's just built like a damn um. you know he's built like a uh let me. look at these woodwind instruments. what are nine women oh yeah he's built.

like a damn oboe. or a bass clarinet bruh. there you go. um. but yeah. great times man great times what else. happened. everything man you guys had some calls. that's really what i want to get to i. want to get to you guys calling in and. uh just hear what's up with y'all you. know. um. [Music]. but. yeah i'm just trying to stay alive and. stay happy and stay well man and i hope.

that's the same thing that you are doing. um. i know you are. what else do we have some calls came in. let's just get into a couple. um. i felt like it was something else fun i. was gonna tell you but. might have forgot it. oh the bus broke down and they gave us a. new bus they got us a new bus took a. couple days. but we drove for like nine hours just in. the back of the bus no power nothing. just hot in there just bacon i mean just.

you know. like somebody just like the toaster you. know just like a little toaster. and that [ __ ] i got out of that thing. finally i wanted to put damn butter on. my back and eat my ass bro you know what. i'm saying dude it just. you know i wanted to put a dang little. uh preserves up and down my. legs and back because i would lightly. i'm just a little bit browned on the. outside brother you know what i'm saying. affirmative action baby. that affirmative action stroller that's. what we were in because i was just baked. when i got out that bad boy i was.

browned out praise god. now before we get into um. the new the. the calls let's get into a little bit of. news. a little bit of intel baby and you know. what i do for my news baby i take my. news straight out of the nearest asian. baby right off the press baby. god's freaking publishing company bro. you know what i'm talking about. there is that that's facts that's all. facts you cut you you freaking get to. know a good asian person and that's. facts son. xerox ain't got [ __ ].

on a good vietnamese friend brother a. polynesian. what you got there riley mao. uh nothing much great to be here. yeah nice to hear you today man you. sound um. your voice sounds a little bit deeper. say something for me. uh hey theo how's it going. yeah it's interesting have you been. doing any different activities you know. uh do you give a birthday have you been. um.

eating anything that would make you. sound stronger doing any. thing like that manly stuff you've been. watching any uh fights or westerns. anything going like that in your world. um i've been. drinking lots of protein powder eating. lots of protein oh really yeah oh wow. and what's got you doing that. um i'm actually with a trainer he's been. um. working out with me. oh that's great man and what are some of. your long-term goals with uh fitness.

uh just to you know be fit don't get fat. um. you have fat family. i do not praise god brother. ah it's hard to trust a fully lean. family i've always thought if i see a. family and everybody's lean it's hard to. tell to trust everybody over there um. what else is going on with you man you. do you feeling good. i did have a kidney stone you did i did. wow and woody what do you think it was. caused by a damn baby that's the lord's.

fruity pebble dog and you had that [ __ ]. huh yeah i have no idea um. i'm supposed to find out from the doctor. in a little bit and how big was it they. let you keep it. no they didn't let me keep it but i. caught it and it's like. very very small wow. like a pebble. and um. what did you do you turned it in. yes. wow. because i don't know if those are catch. and release or not i don't know what the. legal.

i don't know what they let you do there. uh. i don't know what the you know park. rangers or whatever would do with that. but. because i you know i'd be damn you get. pulled over and you got five or six of. those and you're. you know in your car or whatever. um. yeah we had a buddy in high school his. dad had him he. took him one at a party and drank three. of them and then he had to get him um. surgically removed out of his uh. penis. so what's up with you and god baby how's.

god treating you riley uh he's great. isn't he yes he really is man man. he has just all the silverware brother i. know that. and when i need us when i just need. something to pick me up he's got a fork. a spoon. i mean i need something to just ding you. know. just. slice right into my damn heart he's got. a knife. praise god brother. uh in the news what do we got there. raleigh anything happening in the news.

um let's see a disney worker ruined a. proposal. oh really let me see do we have a video. is that here yes. let me look at this. [Applause]. [Music]. and you know what it is man and i don't. want to say this really and i don't know. this.

but a lot of uh uh uh disney is known. it's really a hotbed for um. a lot of gay men. go work day it's their first step out. into. uh a place where they're really i think. you know a lot of it's a mecca for gay. men it's basically the wailing wall. in a lot of ways or it's like um. what's another mecca rally. um. like a popular place people go to.

build a bear. no that's that's. no like a popul popular place that. people go to. like a you know a national monument or. something. all right thank you for the help brother. it's um. you know it's like a. uh. disneyland has long been a hotbed for.

it's like a it's kind of a uh. homoerotic sort of um. a halfway house. for young gay men i believe have you. ever heard this rally. i have. and there you go. and um. and so i don't want to i don't know what. this is maybe this guy doesn't believe. in. opposite sex marriage or something i. don't know. uh. so i'm not accusing anybody i'm saying. that that could be something.

that has occurred. um there could be some opposition to. that in that realm. uh you also. uh maybe they just don't let people get. married there. because if you notice a lot of the. different. cartoons don't have parents. they want you to believe they all. magically occurred and there wasn't any. sex you know. nobody wants to think of like a wet uh. what's a popular disney character riley.

mao. mickey mouse. nobody wants to think of us you know. mickey mouse covered in amniotic. and little you know maybe a couple. duties under him or whatever from a. crazy birth. you know from coming down the damn um. you know the uh thunder mountain mom's. thunder mountain so. praise god baby. but uh yeah i guess they they're they. the man said no he said you go on out of. here. and come back with a faint comeback with.

a pretty little. come back with a buddy. or something who knows i don't know but. they're not letting them do it. and uh it's kind of bummer i think if. you you see that in the wedding video. just promotes disneyland but maybe. they'd have people doing it all day so. that could also be an issue what else we. got right let's get into one more news. story. um let's see. oh. uh some tick tock pediatricians urge. people to stop sharing dangerous baby. formula recipes.

okay and when you baby formula riley you. remember you uh. were you on the on the bag are we on the. tit. i don't remember. no recollection. no. even if you purse your lips a little. does anything come back to your memory. no. nothing to mind. well they say yeah people are making. dirty baby formula on here. um.

i'm i'm i'm not shocked you know people. are doing stuff on ticket tick tormula. on tick tock tick tick tick tock people. doing bad stuff on there. everything fake gasoline. all kind of [ __ ] that people said they. came back from the past and [ __ ] on. there time travelers all this [ __ ]. people believe it. people believe it and. you know i guess it's you know i think. if you go in there to get a recipe for. you know a um. a bouillabaisse or a good soup that's. quality but if you go in there to get a. damn uh something to put into a damn.

newborn. you're gonna put a damn 98 octane into. that bastard. or put something you know. has a. afrin in it or something like that. that's poor choice. that's poor choice. what else okay. let's do a couple more ads and we'll get. into some calls man we have some great. ones from you guys mud water i want to. let you know. is a coffee alternative with four. adaptogenic mushrooms and ayurvedic. herbs.

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theo. all right let's get into a couple calls. here from you guys thank you and as. always the hotline is 985-664-9503. theo is jonah from seattle washington. man and i just. jonah. up there. and jonah's a faint name of a famous. whale too if you ever looked at that. in the bible or in um. i don't know if it's in the bible or if.

it's just. just just outside of the bible but jonah. was a famous whale. onward. in seattle area man we get pretty crazy. with the weed man and. you know i grew up ever since i was 13. been smoking weed um and it's definitely. an area in my life that. you know nothing wrong with it but it's. an area in my life i want to grow in. because i can tell it's definitely. taking a strong grip um oh yeah. weedle uh. it's comfortable.

it's comfortable. it's like walking around with a you know. just a pillow just you know. party it's like a pillow party hey. i'm having fun my brain's kind of fun. looks cool looks cool out here what's. going on oh i lost my job. oh. oh all right. oh dunkin donuts. you know that's weed let's hear it. my life you know and um i definitely.

don't know how it is in louisiana i was. wondering. out there in louisiana man what does it. look like dealing with the people who. are always stoned do you even see them. well look brother i'll tell you this man. i grew up in louisiana and it's a. beautiful place dude if you believe in. beauty then you uh. you believe in that state. and it's one of the top 50 states and. it's. louisiana purchase we did that. so. half y'all would be canadian if we.

hadn't done the deal. you're welcome. but i want to say this i remember weed. was fun. weed was fun back in the day. you know you get that swamp gas baby. start huffing it up and that [ __ ] was. brown bro some of it have a damn gator. claw in it or a damn little falcon half. a falcon nut in that bastard weed. louisiana weed baby damn. that thing bro you take a hit of it and. the water level in your yard would rise. that [ __ ] would whoo.

and she was thick boy that [ __ ] was. thick. you know that thing dude you damn uh. i mean they had just trimmed baby that. [ __ ] was that [ __ ] you know. that [ __ ] that. they trim those reggie bushes bro and. you hit that slam jordan dog you know. what i'm saying baby that [ __ ] was south. and i loved getting high as a child was. great i don't care where you were. you know uh. dude. i remember the weed you get a bag of.

weed on it if you didn't want to uh. smoke it they'd have a damn recipe for. you. uh. make you a little bit of a2 faded you. know. some um. you know get you a little bit of uh just. that gumbo. just that freaking get your brains all. you know. get of your brain just [ __ ] looking. for itself bro. you know you could feel your brain. looking for itself dawg that should get. you gassed up. that shit'll have you singing the. national anthem bruh.

at a um. that [ __ ] will have you singing a. national anthem to a spice rack dog. that's that louisiana swamp gas yeah. getting high in louisiana was fun man as. a child and getting high anywhere as a. child is great if you can do it do it. then and do it well and do it high. and i remember we used to be over at my. buddy's house. and um. we used to get high over there. and his daddy wasn't super his daddy. wasn't super fond of gays at the time he.

didn't he wasn't anti-gay he just didn't. know anything about it and it made him. real uncomfortable. um so me and my friend and my other. friend we go outside we smoke weed i'd. come back in early to the house i'd be. the first one back in and i would go to. my buddy's dad i would know about that. kind of gay trigger he had. and i would just tell them i'd be like. hey mr mike you know uh. you know they were kind of being a. little. i don't know what they were doing sir. they just. i saw them kind of like. you know once somebody took their shirt.

off for no reason outside i just some of. this stuff was just. made me uncomfortable right. so then my two buddies would come back. into the house stoned out the gills baby. i mean just [ __ ] fish food and baby. they weren't doing well. and now suddenly my buddy's dad is. grilling them about being gay and they. don't know that i told the uh the dad. the stuff so. i used to love that kind of [ __ ] man. create an ambiance. you know create an ambiance that um. you know it was just so good.

that's it was fun maybe those are the. good old days uh you ever you ever done. anything like that riley you never. smoked any weed have you bubba. i have not. and are you afraid do you believe that. getting high could leave could lead. people to homosexuality. possibly. i mean there's a lot of there was a lot. of drug induced uh. gay activity when i was young but that.

was higher octane drugs you're looking. at methamphetamines looking at stuff. like that. but low-grade branch dope i don't know. if that would get somebody all the way. to the you know onto another fellow's. peg or. or sweat wallet you know. if it's women let's hear more let's get. another call that came in man um. yeah this is josh from australia my. topic is. nipple piercing. i've just recently started dating this. girl and she's got two nipple piercings. i don't really know what to think about.

it i haven't read too much into it but. uh not someone know what your thoughts. are and the listeners thoughts on. chicks or dudes with nipple piercings. like what does that say about someone. look man i think it says for one that. they that they you know they got no. excuse not to have a spare house key on. them. that is for sure uh they should be able. to usually get one extra hanging on. there you know so that's not a bad deal. at all never get locked out. oh. that nipple piercing i think it's kind. of it definitely seems sexy on a woman.

when you think she's got nails right. through her tits you know that's really. there's something erotic and almost. biblical about it you know. because they put god on the cross baby. so everybody kind of has had their. moment in the. you know in the metal sun. um if you will so i don't think it's. insane to want to get pierced up and. and uh put holes in your body or. something like that and i think if a. woman got it you know i actually made. love to a woman recently and she had she.

was really uh. she had some piercings on her. you know she had them hooters really uh. had them you know i mean she'd taken. them hooters to. damn home depot baby you know what i'm. saying she had some real. um. you know she had some real uh. metallurgy done on those things i mean. it could have been a welder hanging off. the bottom of one of them [ __ ] baby. she had them think she had some real. you know she had some one of them had a. damn door knocker on it you know that. thing was hello.

so. um. so yeah i like them i like them and oh. man i think it's crazy you know i. remember one time i was doing a tour. somewhere in africa. uh with military british military i. think and i fell in there he pulled out. his wiener and he had a big. piercing on it and it looked insane bro. and i think the guy was uh. you know what i'm saying i think the guy. had smoked a little too much weed if you. know what i'm saying bro you know what.

i'm talking about so. praise god brother um. what else man. uh. [Music]. we'll do one or two more calls here i. appreciate you guys as always hitting. the hotline 985 664 985-664-9503. um here we go. okay. hear me out. i've been watching your podcast for a. while now.

and. how would you. take this. or i ain't not a word. i don't know what to do. i [ __ ] my best friend's mom. and. she. won't leave me a world now. and. now i don't know what to do about it. so. well i think it's a question what kind.

of friend are you brother. you know you you know if you made love. to your buddy's mother of course she's. gonna like you. because if it's your best friend he. likes you you're best friends. so you're just you know. he came out of her so you're going back. to the. you know you're going back to the front. porch of his creation and. hanging out there. so yes the mother's gonna like you the. kid likes you. you know your buddy likes you so.

i think you gotta just hit for the cycle. dude and be a damn step dad brother. you know step up to the plate who else. you're gonna date you're gonna date. somebody across town. somebody that's working over there at. the dunkin donuts at the drive-thru or. something. somebody that's you know. somebody some weird person that when. they go to a restaurant they like fill. their hand up with like salt or sugar. and dip their finger in it while they're. waiting to eat dinner and lick it and.

then lick the salt or sugar off. who are you gonna date somebody like. that. are you gonna date your best friend's. mom. and go in there and be a champion not. only for her but for your friend. imagine that. imagine one day you sit down with your. buddy and say hey man. i love you so much as a friend that i'm. gonna take care of your mother for the. rest of her life. when you come over on my grill for you.

you know i'm gonna get i'm gonna get. angry at you i'm gonna [ __ ] make you. try and make you rake the yard. and i'm gonna fist fight you in your. mother and i's own yard. what do you want. what does god want. ah thank you guys so much for the calls. man i love you guys man um. all right all right let's take another. call here.

hey theo is designing from uh eating in. oklahoma. uh. went to tulsa to see you recently loved. it it was great. thank you man thank you for coming out. and thank you for uh. spending your time over there yeah that. was exciting dude that was an exciting. night onward. i was just wondering if you had even the. advice. um. i let my. the mother of my child down recently.

at least i have been for the past two. years and. i wasn't drunk. i'm. finally realizing everything and trying. to be better but. apparently it's too late so you know. remind me if you have any advice on how. to keep on going man. love you. you help me. get through the hardest things. thank you so much deal. thank you bro for the call man um.

i'm sorry that you're that you're. suffering uh. but also i'm glad that you are. you know uh. and i say this this is why i say that. um. [Music]. because. you know it sounds like you have some. realization now you're able to get some. perspective maybe. that the way you've been operating has.

investments servicing you. or those you care about the most. you know. you know i don't have a wife or child or. anything like that but. yeah it breaks my heart because i know. it breaks your heart man. you know. i know it breaks your heart to see you. make the choice. to not choose them. and that i can relate to. you know i can relate to making choices. that uh.

that don't serve you. or me you know or you know i can relate. to making a choice that i know isn't. good for myself and i do it again and. again. i can relate to that man um. [Music]. so that's where i'm going to try to. relate to you at. uh. [Music]. for one thank you for even thinking to. bring this up. you know because i'm sure a lot of. people struggle with this kind of stuff. and i say that i'm glad you're getting. you know you're so i'm glad you're.

suffering i'm glad you're suffering but. i'm glad that you're having some some. realization because there's some. realization there in that suffering. there's some perspective. um because we need that we need. something to adjust the perspective. enough so we can see that the operating. we're doing isn't doing us well. and if i'm not operating well then that. means that there's something wrong with. the operation or the operator that's me. there's something unaligned it's not. wrong it's just something on the line. because i'm not choosing the best. choices that are making me feel good.

um. [Music]. and so i got to adjust and for me that's. where you know going leaning back into. my program 12 steps that kind of stuff. helps immensely. it does magic behind the scenes that you. can't even quantify. um. and it takes away that shame that's what. i hear in you too i hear shame. i hear shame man damn.

and shame is what shame is that trick. shame is a trickster. shane's play you know. shane plays a dirty trombone dog. that's a little soil soldier dog that's. all he's got. in that uh. and that music maker is sod bro. because he he's a dirty shame is a dirty. because you start hearing feeling your. own shame and that that keeps you stuck. shame is a mud. it's a real mud.

so anyway man i'm saying a lot of that. stuff because uh. now you have some perspective so now you. can see you got to make some adjustments. so that you making different choices. towards the people you care about the. most. um. and it's possible that's what i'm going. to tell you here i'll take these off too. i don't want to be talking serious with. you. not be able to see you or as best i can. um. [Music].

you know it's hard to choose love. sometimes in the world it's hard. it's hard. and i don't know why you're not doing it. in your life i don't know why. but there's a lot of people out there. not doing it. you know i've not done it a ton there's. areas of my life i'm not doing it. i'm choosing something else and i don't. know why. and you know what i don't exactly have. to figure out that why what what i do. have to do is just get myself into a. place where i'm choosing the things i.

need to be choosing and so that's where. i believe that a 12-step program can. help you out. because that has been the best success. that i've had after all the things i've. tried. that program i feel like is best giving. me the opportunity and the different. feelings inside. to have a new experience. and it's not over with the gal that's. not over. she can't tell you that everything's. gonna be okay right now that's not fair. that'll keep you in the same spiral. you know if she throws a life preserver.

into the toilet you still in the toilet. you know the same baby that you know we. got to get you into a damn bird bath dog. that's where we got to get you. um. so. just don't be hard on yourself. just try not try not to be hard on. yourself and i think try something. different you know i think trying a. 12-step program will help a lot let me. listen to the end again so i can hear. just again in case i missed anything for. the past two years and. i wasn't drunk.

i'm. finally realizing everything and trying. to be better but. apparently it's too late so you know i. was wondering if you had any advice and. how to keep on going man. love you. and the advice will start to come from a. higher power and from the program so. that will help you. you'll get it it's it's interesting. it'll start to get built into you. you just keep going to meetings and keep. listening to people and i would go to. speaker meetings you can go to them on.

zoom first if you feel more comfortable. um. and because once you start to feel like. you can keep on going then you're going. to feel like you can go further but. first you got to feel like you can go. and then it will all evolve man i. promise you. i promise you you will have other. opportunities with this. with this person with this child you. will have all of that. you know.

all those things are possible but now if. you know that something's wrong and you. continue to do you continue to do it. then you are kind of choosing to suffer. you know you said real. realized it you know you realize these. things so now you have knowledge so once. you have that knowledge if you continue. to do it. then you are choosing to suffer. you know uh. and sometimes you may make that choice. but if it's a continued thing maybe it's. you know and i just said i'm not judging.

you i've done it. and that's where self-pity starts for me. i continue to stay in these loops and i. don't even recognize it. i just continue to want to have a re. some reason to suffer. um. [Music]. and i just don't want to see the same. thing happen to you man that's that's. happened to me before you know uh so. anyway just don't feel alone brother and. just keep your head up baby. you know. um. [Music]. because you're not alone man i mean.

there's probably 500 000 people. listening to this that are thinking of. you. and that want you to want you to try. you know. they want you to try. you know and i want you to try to i know. it's hard man. it's hard bruh it's hard to [ __ ] try. especially when you have there's a. feeling inside of you like the world. never. it never tried for you. this world never [ __ ] tried for me.

but that's that's just a feeling man. you know. and god gave you like a beautiful child. or whatever you believe in gave you a. beautiful child man and you got a voice. you have the ability to care about. yourself enough to call. you have gifts. you have gifts man. and um. [Music]. and i believe that you can do it brother. i believe you can have a new experience. and that's what i want for you because. it seems like that's what you want for. you so.

anyway man i'm not trying to preach at. you but uh just letting you know that uh. you're not alone baby okay. oh. and i know right where you're gonna end. up bro. the same place we all are. you know where it is bub. you wanna come up daddy. thank you to everybody that came out and. saw me this week.

montgomery augusta columbus. [Music].

that's 89 vote with the come up man you. guys be good to yourselves huh you. deserve it take care of yourselves thank. you for uh loving me when i can't even. love myself at times um i'm grateful to. be a part of this i really am and uh.

yeah we tried our best on those shows. man i'd say probably six out of eight of. the shows on the past two weeks have. been really just lights out couple was. just almost lights out you know i'm kind. of a perfectionist and. that's okay you know uh. it's definitely this you know this show. has really picked up a lot of steam so. i'm grateful to be out there and get to. see you guys in person baby and um. be good to yourselves baby. gang. [Music].

well. [Music]. well i just got home and now i'm back. [Music].

what i really wanna do is just come. right back make love to you i'm gonna. come up. [Music]. yeah that's 89 volt you guys are. checking out if you get a chance and uh. we will be. back next week. uh we got a great guest coming in and. then um we'll probably hit a solo. episode after that and uh.

that's it. you guys take care again.