Louis CK | The Tim Dillon Show #317

ladies and gentlemen welcome to the Tim. Dylan show we are here with one of the. greatest Comics Louis CK uh you can go. buy the movie 4th of July with Joe list. on his website right now you can get all. five seasons of Louis on the website you. can also get all of the iconic stand-up. specials in a bundle I think for 25. that's right that's cheap it is right. it's very cheap yeah. I would have I would have you would have. clicked I would have hiked it. yeah uh I think I could have maybe yes.

but I think that maybe people would have. bought less of them that's a good point. when I when I raise the prices I sell. less of them that tends to happen. interesting and I think uh over time it. ends up not being more money well you. got to come up with a lie like you got. to come up and say these are going away. but that's the thing with digital. content it never goes away it just sits. there you don't even make it yeah they. just bring it they just clone it and. take it for themselves yeah so you can't.

do like the farewell tour which a lot of. people will go you know like shares done. it three times I mean I'm doing this. tour I'm on tour now and this tour I. mean I mean I don't have the list but. I'm coming to Milwaukee and Atlanta. these are new shows I pronounce. everything I sold out right but then I'm. doing the Madison Square Garden on. January 28th and that's the big one. that's the big one I'm doing that in uh. we sold 10 000 tickets the first day wow. and then now it's uh it's trickling. because the seats get shittier and. shittier right but at the last email I.

sent out I said this could be my last. show oh well that's good yeah right it's. not absolutely not of course not but. it's my last show if you want it to be. the last opportunity to ever see me on. stage he's dying it's gonna be like the. Beatles at Shea Stadium yeah he's dying. stage four I'm just that's my last show. the last show yeah. do you ever think of of it when you do. the garden it's going to be such a big. deal after the garden do you think I'll. take a minute yeah who knows maybe the. uh maybe the Boston Garden will call me.

right. the opportunities that the Garden opens. well you're you know that is how I think. yeah I'm going I'm going to take uh I. didn't take a break between the last. tour and this one the tour that ended. with last special sorry I I had shows to. make up from the pandemic that were that. were scheduled in March and June after. the special came out. and I didn't have an act anymore because. I. had to dump all the material into this. you know the special right.

everybody that comes to see me has. usually seen the most recent special. so uh and they expect new material. because that's what I've always done so. I had to write a new act very quickly. I didn't take I took maybe three weeks. off and I went right back to work you. went right back out there yeah and that. turn that turned out I did a different. process of writing an hour. uh how did it differ I just said I like. said you have to do this instead of. letting it flow I just made it happen is. it better to have the pressure.

in this case it was because yeah it came. out good but then I had to it was next. thing I know I'm doing shows in Tel Aviv. and all the you know doing real concerts. with a brand new hour I usually like do. them but but it now it's bet this hour. is like really uh strong I think do you. feel fully back. yeah like fully back. yeah yeah good I mean back to what. nobody's ever back it's always forward. it's new that's a good point yeah okay.

uh I don't have a thing about back and. my head I'm here you do in the garden. yes I am going back to the Garden that's. huge yes I'm really excited. I like that room it's you know in terms. of doing stand-up comedy is that a room. where you go this is the Pinnacle. uh no I mean to me honestly any great. show is the Pinnacle so like I I've done. the garden eight times and my life and.

uh it was important enough to remember. that it was eight I don't know how many. times I've been to this it's amazing. Funny Bone I don't know how many times. but I can't say but. I've done the Columbus Funny Bone where. I've done shows where I'm looking out. the window of the plane the next day. going that was [ __ ] that was it that. was amazing that was it that's what I. would work for that's what I wanted yeah. that's what I this is what this that was. what this is all about that's why I give. a [ __ ] right so uh a show at the Garden. is definitely superficially like it's.

you know the 19 000 people. um and it's Madison Square Garden and. Ali fought Fraser there yeah I saw you. know AC DC there when I was quite young. and yeah Led Zeppelin and I never saw. there but that's where they played. that's where there are concert film. takes place yeah that place touches a. lot of you know sure. uh. uh it feels like a pinnacle in terms of. it's that many people it's New York City. it's the premier room it's also.

expensive it's expensive place renting. it is about 400 000. something like that. yeah I forget to just rent it of course. it's astronomical but they know they got. you because you want to play The Garden. you want to play The Garden I'm now the. new generation is like uh I guess the. Barkley is just as good. no but I mean in a gas but it is it's. just as many people and it's right. Brooklyn but it sounds like a better. city than Manhattan really not to me I. love right where I live I agree with you. but I'm talking about it for the young. people yeah that guy Brooklyn's the.

thing what about the Bronx when does the. Bronx ever you know what I mean because. every area has been gentrified we've. gone into Jersey City or even Harlem. Harlem everything but there's something. about the Bronx that holds on it holds. on and it just goes we're never gonna be. anything but the Bronx it's gonna be. tough yes and that's what it is it's. still 1972 in the Bronx it's still long. Oldsmobiles yes on the street with.

graffiti on them it's a Time Warp you. know like a guy in a leather jacket. carrying a briefcase yeah with the music. right. and somebody's gonna cut it I'm gonna. cut you man right I mean that's I never. go to the Bronx in four times in my life. yeah so we don't know what it's really. like right that's a good point some of. the Bronx is very beautiful you know. each wave Hill sure yeah the beautiful. areas yes there's Green in the Bronx. it's the Bronx to me is the most it's. the it's the best example of why a lot.

of these urban planning things failed. when you look at these big buildings. that they build yeah where all of all of. the you know people have to live kind of. stacked on top of each other in these. very Bleak so but but when you say fail. yeah it depends on what the goal is. that's a great point so the urban. planning was just stick stick as many. people as possible into the cheapest. possible buildings right get paid by the.

city subsidies right because it's not. just a simple building contract yeah. and make a [ __ ] ton of money and put. pack. all of those people into one small space. right out of Manhattan right. you know mission accomplished yes that. right so if that was the goal yeah well. done. it was yeah yeah no that's exactly right. but a lot a lot of great things hip-hop. came out of the Bronx like that that has. given us. sure good things yeah but unfortunately.

at least they got hip-hop you know well. it's it I mean yeah that's it came out. of the Bronx it couldn't have come out. of Long Island where I lived it would. never have hip-hop would have never. emerged from Levittown Long Island we. just did but now it is I mean that's who. got rich from him that is exactly who. got rich no so even in that sense if you. packed a bunch of people way uptown in. these [ __ ] buildings right cost nothing. yes also yeah their squalor will create. music that you will get rich from that's.

right and then eventually they will. they'll get a little money but which you. can count on you will get the Lion's. Share because they'll die right because. it's gonna be bad yeah and you're gonna. take the money I'm sure Biggie's mom. gets a check but it's not but it's not. the check that she deserves you know uh. Josh Josh Josh Robin gets he might get a. bigger check he gets a far bigger keep. coming I just I bought a Biggie album on. iTunes recently yes. I like to listen to him when I'm jogging. yeah it's the best.

uh but uh you know his mom he's not 14. cents yeah well those deals this keeps. on working this thing is keeps on. working yeah these 360 deals that. musicians sign yeah which is like a deal. where they give you an advance and then. they recoup the advance and it's. designed to keep you in debt it's. designed to keep you like constantly not. earning money it's designed to keep you. like beholden to the record company. that's right and everything they give.

you they you think they're giving you. stuff right like they say hey guess what. fellas they go to the band they say. you're flying in a private plane and. they go yeah and then they pay for the. private plane that comes out of their. [ __ ] record yes and the private plane. is a deal that the company has uh you. know vertically yeah with somebody else. right all those bells and whistles are. just just horseshit yes yeah you have to. look after your your own thing I mean I. stopped taking advances on the road a.

long time ago it's a stupid thing right. because it's a they get to call your. advance and expense and sort of take it. away from you and when they split right. well I had to give you an advance yeah. but where that's what right it's such an. easy con yeah that you really and nobody. will tell the artists ever right. nobody's gonna nobody sits down with you. and goes listen don't take that Porsche. yeah exactly right yeah or here's where. your Porsche is coming from they have. this thing now in the Bronx called drill. wrap yeah so what drill wrap is Eric.

Adam just talked about it uh it's it's. very it's social media driven beefs with. young rappers under 21 young guys and. they diss each other on Instagram and I. mean literally they'll go outside of. someone's project and go I'm here like. with a gun they'd be like I'm right here. what if [ __ ] you yeah and and literally. it's they go on Instagram live so Eric. Adams is kind of like maybe we should. ban this on Instagram like the mayor of.

New York's like why don't has it. resulted in any killings lots of. killings wow and the the music is is. reflective of no it's literally but the. kids are 16. so a guy a kid a 16 year. old was shot with a gun with a gun. because look I'm outside of the [ __ ]. whatever you know great black person. projects um outside of the whatever. whatever it is at Med Grabbers project. yes and uh come here and I'll kill you. so now everybody's like oh [ __ ] if I go.

to his Instagram I can see this. everybody and then it starts having like. the little balloons. everybody is a little faces you see the. little faces yeah it starts really going. and people have been literally killed. then the guy shows up inside of the the. Instagram yeah I mean well he's doing. like I'm gonna go yeah kill my friend. yeah and it's and then has this resulted. in like this is resulted in live. Instagram deaths a few of them for real. for real I mean Bobby you can look this.

up but it's resulted in deaths 100. and there and the D.A is now trying to. use the rap lyrics yeah as as a way to. like convict because some of the rap rap. lyrics are so direct they're like we. killed him on 175th by the subway. yesterday right at 4 P.M so the D.A is. going like we're trying to put these rap. lyrics out as evidence right in addition. other things but it's a some of the rap.

is very good I mean it's very like you. know it's very like it's got a whole new. sound and it's it comes to the UK has it. too this is going on in London where. it's like social media you think of all. the rap beefs that have happened of. people not liking each other now you add. social media everything happens in like. real time right but also it feels like. what's needed there. like when you look at a picture and you. go what's missing right and how do we. solve it with what we have today right.

when you describe what those guys are. doing right what's needed is an app. yes that can bring them together more. easier right like a grinder for I'm. gonna kill you 100 like a social media. like a yeah like an app like and it's. like this and you go I don't want to. kill it like it but it's for killing you. like you're swiping well because it is. on some level a guy going I'm out here. he has a gun so I'm out here he's. wanting to connect with that person. that's right he's what I what he really.

wants is to see him I think I'm not even. being facetious it's like no it's a need. to connect it's it's all that this. always is like when I was. um. I in my 20 like I don't know maybe 19. I. was just starting to do comedy. I had a really [ __ ] up job I was a. moderator on a phone line this is before. the internet people used to call party. lines I don't know if you just before. you remember I was 19 and you were dead. I was I was probably how old are you I'm.

I'm 16. no I am I am 37. yeah so that might have been before you. so a party line was calling up like a. party line like live girls type thing it. was all it was guys and girls okay it. was supposed to be come on the party. line we're all here hanging out oh on. the phone yeah on the phone it's a part. call up and you hear people. talking and so and then you get you can. switch to different rooms but it's rooms. of people like talking on a phone it's.

like a chat room but it was just voices. wow it was a 900 number so you were. paying money. per minute to sit there and the the. point they started saying that it's. social but obviously the point is to try. to get laid right and. um the way what would happen is. uh because I so I got a job working. there and it's a being an operator. essentially and you have headphones and. a microphone and you have these Banks. and you see people light up you see oh.

there's 10 people in this room right and. so you go to that room and it's 10 or. 12. uh guys and you go in in silence you see. that they're there. and there's silence because it's all. dudes. and then one light comes on and you hear. a girl go hello and you hello hello hey. hey they all try to talk to her because. no girls will ever want to call right. and my part of my job was to try to like. move people around so there'd be more of. a mix but mainly my job was to break up. fights and they disconnect guys who were.

getting aggressive so they would because. mostly was just fighting yeah hello. hello hi who's that hey dude hey dude. shut up I'm trying to [ __ ] talk to. her and they would fight and then when. they would get in a fight this is in. Boston too all Boston Irish people. trying to get laid on the phone right. minutes dollars so when they got in. fights. they'd go I'm gonna [ __ ] kick your. ass I'm gonna kick your ass and they'd. start yelling at each other and. threatening each other oh yeah where are. you I'll [ __ ] come right where you. are right now and and the guy would be.

like I'm in Quincy [ __ ] [ __ ] homo. the other guy's like I'll [ __ ] I'm. I'm on door chest it's right right I'll. come to [ __ ] Quincy where exactly. [ __ ] Quincy are you I'm on [ __ ] uh. Third Street and whatever yeah wait a. minute is that near the the quick shop. he goes no what do you do and then. they'd calm down yeah to make plans yeah. what when are you gonna be there uh I. gotta I get out of work at seven and. they'd make a date yeah to fight to. fight to fight over a girl who's been.

gone for 10 minutes yeah so it's kind of. a similar thing now now that you just. have social media and you're able to. broadcast all your activities so if you. want to go and show up outside. somebody's house yeah and say like where. are you [ __ ] you talked all this [ __ ]. on that record yeah where are you right. and it's becoming kind of I guess. for the mayor the mayor has said this is. a bear feels like it's got a. we got to put a stop to it yes well I. mean the other thing is there's a lot of.

gangs and I always thought what's the I. always thought that what's the big deal. if it kid's in a gang and hear me out. because the way I feel about certain. things is that you know. is there are there no positives to a. gang this is we've we've we talk about. gangs like there's no positives to them. there's 100 percent positives to being. in a in a gang well to be just to parse. what you're saying you're not saying.

that gangs are 100 positive no they're. saying that you're 100 certain yes that. there's one percent positivity well. there's gotta be well here's the deal if. you live in an area where being in it. it's almost required to be in again in. certain areas you go now obviously if. there's negatives to the gang life that. we don't even have to mention because. they're obvious they're seemingly. obvious you could be a rat you know and. that's not well right if you're a [ __ ]. if if you're you mean what could happen.

to you if you're one of those things. well yeah if you if you can't handle it. like yeah it's obviously if you can't. handle the gang life it's bad there's. negative ramifications. but but and also every gang life ends in. death most likely well some prison and. which means another gang yes yes but my. whole thing is everybody always goes. gangs gang you know like my people like. where I grew up they're like that gangs. and I'm like what are we offering the. kids that isn't the gang that's my. question like well because here's what.

happens right kids that end up in gangs. okay so like your mother. and I'm not describing every gang person. I'm describing somebody I'm making up. right. uh your mother is. you don't even know you haven't seen her. right. sometimes you see her on the street. right she's taking a guy into a uh. building foyer to suck his [ __ ] that's. right so that she can get some crack. cocaine right as soon as you see her go.

oh that's I think that's my mom that's. mom's and you're with your friends and. you're embarrassed right and they tease. you they go haha your mom sucks a guy's. [ __ ] for crash she sucks but the way. they teased us yeah like you look funny. or you know like you you listen to Bay. City Rollers you know but they are like. your mom is sucking a guy's [ __ ] right. there for crap behind the McDonald's I. can see it and then you'll always have. that field one [ __ ] loser you'll. always have that one good friend who's. like don't worry about them yeah don't.

worry don't worry about it their mom's. doing it it's not like their moms. nobody's that standing there to make fun. of that kid right has a great life. exactly so. probably they don't much tease each. other right because the guy the meanest. kids he's that guy's mom sucking a [ __ ]. and he goes I'm gonna let that go right. because I know how that's gonna come. back that's Mom yeah because that's my. aunt that's right that's Auntie yeah. so that's who that person's Mama start. there okay and he uh lives with his.

grandma right. who is just hired at sucking dick so at. least there's that she's elderly yeah. and she goes to church and it's I mean. like it's like that's the church right. or whatever and I'm by the way this is. like 90s I don't know anything about. people's lives anymore I don't know. anything about anyone's life similar and. then his dad is uh killed his uncle and. his uh it was a double murderous. whatever and these people are in prison. and it's just and he goes to his school.

um. where there's no there's just a cop. frisks you at the door yeah it's just. kids throwing chairs yeah it's true. there's no education yes yeah every day. he walks by these gangs and because he's. not affiliated right what the [ __ ] I'm. gonna kick your ass every time you walk. through this neighborhood that's right. and uh his friends all his friends like. if you just joined red you walk down red. streets and you're okay you're okay yes. that will you will be safe if you do.

that and we have parties we have. barbecues right we go out we we we uh we. have fun we there's girl every girl you. want is Right Affiliated or in the gang. right and uh so then you join a gang and. you start acting tough and you start. talking about and then you start. carrying a weapon and then the city says. we gotta get rid of these gangs like. like if we get rid of the gangs right. the kid will be fine right like where. does he walk back like what do you okay.

gang everybody go home to what right. home to what yeah so that's my that was. my whole thing it's like listen we all. know that gangs have a lot of negatives. and the problem is there's nothing being. offered to these kids. outside of that like outside of that. like we have not articulated a vision. for a lot of these young kids that. doesn't involve joining a gang right. that's the issue like we can be. horrified by gangs and people in the.

suburbs are take a hike out I cannot. believe it well because it doesn't. become it doesn't exist for you until. they roll up your street that's right. until you try to go to their. neighborhood you go to their. neighborhood to buy crack right or to. get a [ __ ] from a crack [ __ ] right. and these gangs bother you absolutely. yeah so to me I was always like. obviously I'm not saying join a gang but. I've always understood that people in. certain areas they feel like it's the.

best course of action for them. yeah sure and you know there's also. those people that do the the far. reaching ideas like yeah you know what's. a gang the Republican party. like no yeah you know what the real gang. is yeah the teachers union that's right. that's a real thing for you yeah well I. mean how do you it's hard to clean any. of that up how are you gonna how do you. fix any of that. it's tough no I know how to do it okay.

but I don't it's boring to talk no of. course it's it's it's obvious but it's. boring yeah I'd rather do other things. yeah no I know it's you know what are. you gonna do so like you said you just. kind of watch. I think that there is a quotient is that. I don't even know what that word means I. use it too much no I think you're right. quotient yeah on a podcast know this. you're always right yeah until you have. any self-doubt right see what you're. experiencing right now is a very old. media thing where you go did I say the.

wrong thing is that word wrong that's. old media it's yeah it's old media what. you have to adapt to now is that you're. creating reality every time you utter. something oh great okay yeah so you know. 40 yes it's great there's a quotient. of uh human suffering that's just always. there so you can you can squeeze the the. the balloon here and it pops up here and. it's just I I mean the thing is as long. as you have a world where people want. more than they can hold in their hands.

that's a problem there you're gonna have. this problem that's I mean it's so basic. it goes to the most basic thing that if. you don't get rid of it right you're not. going to solve anything right and should. you what the words the words solve and. goal and failure yeah are all relative. right to what you value and what you. don't you know right so if you like a. world where some people can be not only. rich but just like have four things. right that you don't know where they are. right if you own things that you're not.

holding like this yeah you're part of. the problem right if you view those as. problems right the reason there are. gangs and murder is because I have some. stuff. that's behind the locked door and I. depend on a whole system to keep that's. right people from just going in there. but if you didn't need those if you. didn't need to have and I don't again I. don't mean I mean the wealthy obviously. is an acute example of it yeah. um.

I don't know where human beings got this. urge to have more. than just a little thing of food and you. know what I mean a roof. a uh food you know a tool to make food. with you know. um but that's the stem that's where all. the problems all of them because if you. don't if you just need what you really. just need sustenance and a little. pleasure from right the sky and. the the nature then.

um you need someone to look after [ __ ]. for you you need to convince someone. else that it's a good idea for them. to protect your stuff the stuff that. you're not you while you're sleeping or. stuff that you can't look at you know. what I mean and that creates that. creates a system of like people willing. to harm each other for somebody else's. money right. yeah and the only way you do that is by. convincing them something like well. they're from the other team or they're. the other religion or they're not really. bad people that kind of thing so yeah.

but once you human skills are learned. for one thing and then apply to a bunch. of other ones so we learned this skill. of like a con get other people to. protect my stuff right for this and that. reason and get talk people into hurting. each other which isn't natural right. um. and then once you've done that you can. transfer that to many things like let's. make a whole country let's Annex the. country let's do this let's do that. let's do this let's do that and then you. you have people if you fast forward you.

know have people in the Soviet Union or. not the I'm sorry Russia yeah breaking. their arms trying to avoid a. prescription a draft right and then the. government says well now you're a. one-armed Soldier [ __ ] dummy you. shouldn't have done that because now. you're gonna have an even a harder time. yeah you're out there that's right. because people in Russia now are going. hey we don't want to do this this is. your thing you know what's weird is. we're not in that war that's Russia. versus Ukraine right that's right we're. funding Ukraine we're obsessed with it. and we're not even in it we're not in it.

but we're giving them money as far away. from us as you can get Awards we're. giving them money and we are giving them. weapons yes but you know that Iran yeah. like if you look on CNN.com yeah right. now. it's uh Trump. uh Trump trump yeah always. uh Marjorie green are you playing person. she's got four stories she's getting a. divorce Brett Favre use him they go.

after Herschel Walker once in a while. like let's just bring up another hey we. just found out that Herschel Walker is I. didn't shave well this morning they just. that's what's on CNN.com and the weather. and whatever yeah I'm not saying the. weather about Tampa right. that's CNN.com right now I I ran is like. a central problem to American history. going back since I was alive yeah. they're having a [ __ ] Revolution. right now like they're having yeah.

there's people there's Freedom Fighters. in Iran being like mowed down and. they're still they're just going [ __ ]. you we're gonna do this right and. they're fighting for a general sense of. Freedom against this regime that we've. been like saying is like they feed. weapons to the Russians they're evil the. evil Iranians who are and we conflate. them with it they're not even Arabs. they're not anything that anyone thinks. they are right. uh the the thing that the pro Iran's. problem with us was that we really.

[ __ ] with them yes for years for years. so they got rid of our guys and they. just said all Iran is really ever said. the US is just leave us the [ __ ] alone. yeah get away from things invaded us. yeah but anyway yes so let's say they're. the biggest problem in the world there's. people there just like walking in the. streets with no weapons just trying to. get rights now like there's a huge. that's a huge you know that here really. cares no one gives a [ __ ] no one cares. it's not on CNN.com no it's not on the. whole if you scroll down you get to like. you know it's like here's a surprising.

picture of Lindsay Wagner right the the. bionic woman right you know she looks. like [ __ ] now right I mean I've seen. it's on Instagram I was I once went on. politico.com yeah you have to take some. responsibility for the banner ad right. above your name right. that says Politico yeah and above it it. says the woman from. a Crocodile Dundee is disgusting now. that's what it said she's disgusting now.

I was like wow okay Politico why don't I. get to believe the Politico they sold. that space and said hey if you want. Politico to sponsor your idea give us. money right and that idea was that girl. is disgusting now she's disgusting that. was the word used I remember that very. well but so that's what's important to. those people but there's an actual thing. I this I ran is like a huge huge thing. but it's on Instagram like you go on. Instagram and you see that there's.

Persia because I'm in L.A so in La. everybody has relatives in Iran so. everybody is posting on Instagram like. please. talk about this yeah use your platform. amplify the voices but no one in no one. wants no one because they're not sure. what is that is that like yeah. terrorists what is Iran right and I. share the post of it like I shared a. post on my story I don't know what that. did but like you know there was a woman. that got killed there and I yeah I I. don't know the the morality police or.

The Virtuous police whatever they are. yeah killed a woman right and then the. progressive people the woke people. killed her no the you know the the. Iranian guard they call it it's a. morality they have one there too they. have one there but it's different yeah. it's what ours wants to be right where. they actually that's why there's they're. going like hey don't right maybe that's. why they're not into it well the other. things attacking Iran because they. they're like we actually we want to do. that yeah well the other thing is just. like in in Putin's such a great villain.

yeah he's just he's just a a Hollywood. Dylan yes a KGB yes kills his friends. white guy white man heterosexual white. man beautiful villain yeah and now the. Iranian mullahs are are less a trade. they have an old religion yes and. they're people of color and they've been. to and we'd [ __ ] and leveled in our. country and we overthrew and the Shah. the whole thing so there it's tougher to.

kind of aren't the Kardashians. Kardashians they're Armenian I believe. Armenian there are Armenians so close to. the word Iranian yeah well they're. related they should care they sh they. should and they might do a post they. should be like okay we're not Iranian. but we're Armenian yeah it sounds like. it so please help please help well. there's also there's not much to do it's. the way I felt about Ukraine when it. happened was I was like hey well there's. nothing you can do about any of these. things it's not our [ __ ] business. it's not our business but if you're. gonna have a News website sure you. should mention a piece of news talk.

about it but I mean an Iran Iran Iran. Iran yes. I've always been fascinated by it yeah. they make beautiful movies yes there is. a film there I I think it's called. cherry tree or sweet cherry or something. like that and it's about a guy I saw it. years ago on VHS. it's about a guy driving around town. asked he wants to kill himself but he'd. said his sin he can't do it so he's. driving around town asking people to. kill him.

and it's just that it's like in real. time and it's just heartbreaking. beautiful beautiful movie right there's. another movie from there called the. separation that's actually was made in. international noise yeah like I still. makes films I think it's about an. Iranian couple breaking up. and raising their daughter separately. and it's in the trappings of their War. their culture and their Traditions but. it's really just. it's just a like there's a scene where. the dad is with his daughters like 14.

yeah and they stop to get gas and it's a. very beautifully shot movie you see the. guy and he tells his daughter. um the guy just pumped the gas and he. says pay the guy. and he gives her money and she goes how. do I she's never done that before and he. goes just go give him the money and get. the change and then you see him in the. mirror he's watching his daughter. negotiate a simple thing and he just has. this smile on his face yeah because he. knows he sees her doing something. growing up right that's such a moment. right when I saw that I was like.

I didn't need that to tell me but it's. like there's no difference between me. and New York City you know right. divorced dad and an Iranian dad because. we're sold this idea that it's this. whole all of the world yes it's not a. beautiful culture right and uh. so they have I mean we there's we never. give a [ __ ] about the actual Freedom. Fighters like you don't really hear much. about the Hong Kong folks no. Taiwan it's like our goal is Taiwan John. Cena apologizes for saying that Taiwan. exists well no no our goals I don't. think it's ever been freedom I think.

that's no no no no no no no we don't we. don't really want I don't even think we. want freedom here really no I think what. we want is this illusion of it and the. illusion that it is or the top of our. list like well you're saying we and. that's the thing is it's right amazing. thing about this version of like this. thing this this social media this not. this weird thing is that everyone. identifies with and says they use words. like everybody and we and we why is. everything like this it's not right. barely anything this is how I feel about.

social media is that like everyone calls. it everybody. right like it's always like you know. John Travolta right said this and. everyone got mad that's always the story. first of all they're not everyone right. they're not even a lot of people right. they're not even most people they're not. even their whole selves right there's no. whole person right on Twitter none or. Instagram or uh or on in the media. because those are just giant twitters. those are just long tweets yeah.

there's no whole person on Twitter it's. a fraction of a bunch of different. people that adds up. to a large number of fractions yes that. doesn't represent any whole person right. like if you cut a bunch of a dog's heads. off. and put them in a pile you wouldn't say. that adds up to like 50 dogs you. understand it's just their heads it's. just their heads and in this case it's. just their [ __ ] it's just their it's. just their [ __ ] period it's just this.

yeah worst part of ourselves yeah of. them of not even all of I'm not on. Twitter most people aren't. almost nobody is on [ __ ] Twitter and. even the people that aren't aren't. actually holy there what's that's why. they wake up in the morning and look at. their own tweets and go yeah I love. doing this podcast I love talking to you. guys 14 years ago in 2008 I was a. mortgage security salesman can you. believe that that's not true I sold. retail mortgages but they don't know. that who wrote The Copy whatever reminds. me of what's going on now it's bad then. it's bad now one thing I really like is. Masterworks it basically it allows.

people regular people to invest in art. invest shares in art you can't afford a. Picasso that's okay why do rich people. constantly put their money in art. because a lot of times uh it's beating. the S P 500 and they know it Microsoft. founder Paul Allen he has a billion. dollars worth of art he hoarded why he's. not an idiot he knew that [ __ ] was going. to appreciate proof is in the pudding to. date Masterworks it sold six paintings. for an average net return of 29 to. investors what Masterworks allows you to. do is buy shares in these iconic pieces.

of art that only go up in value okay and. there is a wait list but they're look. they're hooking all my listeners up with. priority already access to their. platform just go to masterworks.art Tim. that's. masterworks.arttim for Priority Access. I'm telling you right now it's something. I wish I had done and I'm starting to do. now diversify money into the art world. because art continually goes up in value. okay rich people have done this forever. it's something that like Precious Metals. it just doesn't go anywhere so art you.

love it you need it but you can't afford. it dummy so you got to get shares of it. this is true this is a fact. I'm being factual. Masterworks is the move just go to. masterworks.org Tim that's Masterwork. dot art slash gym for Priority Access. see important regulation A disclosures. at masterworks.com CD that's. masterworks.com CD I love these guys. I love Masterworks I'm using it and it's.

amazing I me and my friends and family. have used Masterworks now and it to me. it's something that I can't get enough. of I don't think you'll be able to get. enough of it. it's just one of those things it's like. oh here's a great thing I'm doing for. you again you know so many of my friends. are losing their hair and they're. they're switching to keeps keeps is so. great okay I'm telling you right now if. you want to keep the head the hair you. have on your head the way to do it is. keeps okay it is a hair loss treatment. prescription medication delivered at.

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they're being incredibly generous and I. think that that is a really really good. thing uh for all the baldies out there. that are balding uh don't be a balding. baldy go to keeps save your hair what's. interesting is how. at this point in our society. going back. seems impossible meaning that the thing. that has been created seems to be the.

thing that is going to be. either what drives us into Extinction uh. but it doesn't ever feel like people are. going to say wait a minute this on the. whole is overtly negative and that the. you know like everything about it like. every single thing about every single. thing about it is overtly negative and. yes there are positives just but but I. mean it's like I could I could show more. positives for being in a gang than. Twitter and it's not even close right so.

it but it does feel like everybody's so. invested in it and it's taken over the. world so quickly that it's just you know. the people that are gonna opt out are. going to be you know just kind of like. they're going to be luddites they're. going to be people that are kind of Off. the Grid and they're not going to really. you know they're not going to be able to. participate in society because this you. know in order to participate now in any. societal function you have to be on the. ground so all if you're on the yes it's.

true you can't even listen to a piece of. music you can't without a credit card. without a membership to the most elite. club of the American economy that's. right you can't when I was a kid a. credit card was a special thing yeah and. you paid for things with cash and checks. and you would sometimes have a credit. card but it was hard to get and you had. to sign up and be you had to have. accreditation yeah you have to be. approved you had to have your [ __ ]. together right that's still the case. right or or you have to be find an.

entity that's willing to just like gouge. you for you know yeah for how much debt. you take on you know. um the debt that people have to go you. can't exist without debt no you can't go. like I don't like credit cards I just. wanna I wanna pay for what I have and I. don't want to have to be in debt you. must be and you have to create a open. debt. with a huge core frenzy that outweighs. you in every way right in order to. listen to some tunes in order to just.

smoke a joint and listen to a song Yes. like that's and in order to get a job. now you have to have all these you know. profiles they search your social media. profiles that's right this is something. that you know in order to be uh uh you. know when you were apply to college they. search these things when you are so you. are recording all the mistakes you make. from when you're not telling kids you're. not telling them when they start this. stuff right that this is it this is. what's happening against you potentially. I mean that's look this is it's very.

delicious yeah to describe how horrible. all this is right because you can go on. and on in so many directions right I do. think on some level it'll just go it'll. just sort of like become something else. interesting I have four nephews yeah. that are from like I mean my sisters. would be a guest at how little I know. know about these boys right their ages. but they're they exist I'm gonna say. they're between. um 14 to 21. okay.

so they're like really the next people. yeah and uh they kind of get get it. right. they I have daughters too but I don't. want to talk about them that's personal. for my nephews I don't care right. but yeah or should you yeah they get uh. that that they have ways around [ __ ]. they hide in different places on the. internet well what's actually. encouraging to see is that kids now post. less so it's cringy to have a lot of.

photos on Instagram it is like a little. my little cousin goes your Instagram's. cringe yeah because you have all of. these photos and I go that's my career. yeah because yeah but I have three. photos he goes so he goes I get it that. you're a comedian you have to do that. but I just have three photos like two. one of them's a night sky one of them's. like a skateboard and one of them's like. a blur a blurry face yeah that you can't. even tell is his but it is cool and. that's cool because if he was like. dressing grunge yes he goes if I post it. every day I would it would look thirsty.

and oh I like hungry. so he goes I I stay away from that and. that's all people in his generation are. doing that hopefully that opens I mean I. think that's where it's headed it's like. we're like what is gonna happen because. mystery is cool again yes that's right. Mystique Mystique that's what ruined our. generation nation of of famous people. and artists yes there's no mistake. look right and it's so many images of. the same person right over and over and.

over and over and over again I wanted to. ask you about the teacher and I want. Bobby to get this picture up there's a. teacher in Canada who's a trans teacher. the giantess yes it's like everybody's. the same [ __ ] stories everybody it's. the same story giant hits yes I mean. what is she doing in that class for well. no I mean. it's the same thing I think last week it. was the LA school system saying that. food is and your bid on it was. hysterically funny thank you but the. thing and I listened to your bit I just.

laughed and laughed about let's tell. kids that all the foods are the same why. not the difference between the food sure. it was the best take on it oh thank you. but that thing which is just somebody. yeah who works at La unified po went. like this right and then plowing yes and. so then there was I listened to some. other podcasts that I actually like but. it was a very serious discussion do we. need this yeah and every go goes around. the bases and everybody takes a turn. well so now it's like who's got a taste.

are so big yeah that's the thing it I. could ignore the story if they weren't. that big they're so massively big that. it this person wants you to discuss it. yeah but she doesn't need the whole. planet Earth to discuss it you don't get. tits that big if you don't think they. want everybody on Earth you want them to. be able to see the scene from space she. wants there's no way when getting these. tits they cheated but people have a. right to be [ __ ] stupid yes people.

have this is the problem right now is. there's no local stupidity yes. localized stupidity yeah like there was. the the woman in somewhere else in. Canada. it all leaks out it's Global if you do. something stupid you are gonna [ __ ]. die from shame right because the entire. there's gonna be Joy read right and. eventually Putin right will say that. they.

no one gets to just be like you know. this it's just the same as like [ __ ]. there's no coffee shop down the street. which is Starbucks it doesn't matter. where you are right so it's not like you. know what I like about you know or or. whatever [ __ ] Eugene Oregon is that. coffee place I used to go no it's right. you know what I like about Eugene Oregon. the same thing as the airport in. Cincinnati yeah it's just the Starbucks. yeah so no one gets to have a little. local culture with the you know there's. a weird person down there you know yeah. like that woman who was like the NAACP.

chapter head who is white white yeah. Rachel dolezel yeah see you know her. name she should have she should have. been able yeah I'm not chastising you. for noise you're the only you're the. only end user that's worthwhile for any. of this right right. but that woman should have been able to. be weird. I said let Alec bolden's wife pretend to. be Spanish I said let her pretend to be. black I think no sure yeah her name's. hilarious she's she's pretending to be a.

rich Spanish lady she's not LARPing as a. maid she's not on all fours she's not. cleaning floors she's she's pretending. to be a rich better do you know the. difference between a rich Brazilian. woman and a rich Jewish woman not that. much difference so I was lit just let. her put on an accent she just wants to. have an affectation yeah she wants to. see you know she goes to these parties. these rich white [ __ ] every day she. wants to be a little different she wants. to stand out and her husband's Alec. [ __ ] Baldwin he just dominates all. the news so like just for her to be like. okay Justice for something for somebody.

to go and where are you oh where are you. from and she goes uh you know it's just. something fun for her sure yeah but also. she wants to be International that's. right she married a man who's an. International Celebrity and yeah you. know gun guy so I mean and I so I've. always been I'm for letting everyone. pretend to be everything yes but you. then you have folks like uh the kids in. a in in Wisconsin. I think it was yeah who were taking a. class picture. and somebody said do a Nazi salute a.

joke and they're just they're kids on. the planet Earth. in the middle of Wisconsin with a lot of. empty space around them yes and and they. they're living in a town that doesn't. benefit from a global Community right. just in a little place throwing a little. couch and they want to make a dumb they. want to make a dumb joke yes and they do. the Nazis so go ahead and like freeze. frame this. and meme I knew it he's a Nazi go ahead.

right I can take it you can take it but. those young but those kids are just. wouldn't you know yeah I mean God the. [ __ ] you said when you're in junior high. school yeah and then somebody would. throw up and there it is throw up a. secret oh that we're doing it yeah now. we're [ __ ] let's give that another. all they they're all all everyone in. that picture was like thank God that. died down and now we're bringing it back. it's the nightmares of never-ending. nightmare. it's a NE I mean comedy is a terrible. part of this cycle well it's a terrible. part but these kids and then it's like.

and then [ __ ] people from [ __ ]. assignment reason thought yeah going you. know or whoever the [ __ ] yeah they're. like it's like Auschwitz all over again. yeah it's just like the yeah this is. yeah I mean come on let them do a dumb. thing over there yes yeah well it's what. you you really hit on it brilliantly. with that term localized stupidity yeah. that doesn't exist and the idea that. people need to be stupid in their local. town and they need to have somebody go. hey you're an idiot and it doesn't need. to be national news and it doesn't need.

to be in cultural moment or. international news no it just needs to. be something that's kind of quickly. forgotten right but what's not going to. stop any of that yeah is that there's. profit in it that's right do you ever. walk in your house and there's junk mail. on the floor like 10 cents. so now that's sent to a business manager. but yeah but it exists of course I still. get junk mail right with a little window. in the envelope with plastic in it yeah. then there's they put some in the window.

that makes you that looks like a dollar. or something right. the idea I mean junk mail physical junk. mail work to take to to get in on the on. the scam yeah to be suckered yeah you. have to open it and fill it in and and. send it in and send it they might make. 10 cents a month right. but it's worth it it's worth it it's. worth it it's a little more than they're. spending and so as long as that's and. then the internet there's no physical. you just go like damn [ __ ] you know.

and the the trick with the media is just. to put a question mark yeah just like. this uh Scandal uh you know uh uh Robin. Williams was actually murdered by Sean. Penn right question well this gets you. out of the liability. yeah I don't know maybe yeah somewhere. in the somewhere in the story you bury. you do absolutely not it didn't happen. but people go huh as long as that'll. make 10 cents right they'll do it. there's always a profit motive that you.

know yeah like going back to Iran for a. moment the last time I ran was the big. thing for us was in 1980 when the there. was the hostages right yeah the Shah of. Iran nobody remembers this these you. know you all think that you know Paul uh. Simon was in The Beatles so you're not. gonna know what I'm talking about right. but there was uh the shave Iran was a. puppet dictator that we it was a direct. employee of the United States that's. right. and uh he was ejected by the Ayatollah.

and by the Iranians who because he was. in he put incredible suffering on the. Iranian people just American. uh paid for suffering right I don't. remember what our why we made money. doing this yeah maybe they because they. had oil I don't know. but anyway when he so then there was. this thing with the Ayatollah and then. everyone was they were they took. hostages so we were expelling Iranians. out of the country we were throwing. submaranians out of the country and my. mom and my dad we lived in Massachusetts. then and my mom was at MIT learning.

computers and she knew this guy who in. Cambridge he knew a bunch of that there. was he just was this guy who reminded me. of you a little bit that he's just a guy. who gets he's got his capitalism he's. right there you know what I mean right. so he figured out that there's Iranian. families all over Cambridge that are. needing to leave this week right. and they all bought their kids trans. amps they all bought their kids that. 1978 black Trans Am with a gold eagle.

that was Burt reynolds's car right in. Smokey and the bandits yeah and so he. knew that there was all these so he went. around to the houses of people like. frantically packing and said how much. for your Trans Am and he bought like 50. Trans Ams so we're brand new for nothing. put them all on a lot he bought a he. bought a a used car lot for like a week. and just moved them made a fortune yeah. so as long as people are making money on. that you're just not gonna stop it yeah.

it wasn't a great analogy but that's. what that's why the woman with the big. tits yeah he's just paying off like a. slot machine and she's just being. drilled into it I mean either that or. maybe she's like maybe she's flourishing. maybe it feels good I don't know but I. but I have a feeling it's really not fun. for her and for the kids in her class. and for the teachers and the school and. all the local people see this is good. I never think about it like that yeah so. that's why I mean if you're gonna if you. go after you know [ __ ] uh share for.

her the new lip or whatever the [ __ ]. it's a different thing I agree but. there's there's this I'm not even saying. you shouldn't do it no no because I. enjoy listening no I understand but. there's a certain thing now there is a. new social contract whether people like. it or not and I think there's a lot of. things to not like about it we've. Illustrated a thousand of them but there. is a new social contract where if you. get tits that are bigger than anything. that anyone has ever seen and you teach. in a school where you're in a shop class.

you teach shop you solder things. together these tits you know my shop. teacher's name is Mr swanovsky he was a. creepy old guy and this is what every. shop teacher should be he was a creepy. old dude who never smiled and would just. make a face when we were doing something. because we were never doing the right. thing and he just cared about soldering. irons and heating them up and just. making sure that the little dumb rods. that you know and we put together these.

little things that were and it meant. nothing and none of these skills mean. anything because you hire someone anyway. it's one of it's the least valuable. position in a school and you know that. because everything you do is fake nobody. in shop class goes you know what I want. to be an architect it never happens what. happens is like you just make little. [ __ ] things all day and and then. these kids just and you just try kids. the only thing in Shoppers don't hurt. yourself it's the only thing in child. class just don't kill yourself don't. hurt yourself please don't embarrass me.

don't go to the nurse we don't want any. accidents in fact the first three days. of chop are him telling you about all. the horrible things that have happened. to other kids that didn't listen that. talk during the safety precaution this. guy burns his hand this guy can't use. his pinky everything's [ __ ] and it's. such a horrible job it's a bad job it's. not even like biology right where at. least you can go like they need to know. this it's nothing and then this woman. goes and says I'm gonna get the biggest.

tip that anyone has ever seen not big. tits I'm talking about the cartoonist to. the point where it literally I have to. now stand back a foot and a half from. the saw yeah when I'm teaching the kids. because these kids now are in between. the kids and these shop [ __ ] things. and it's so cartoonish that she Waddles. around this room with the big big tits. and then she said and we should be.

allowed to laugh at her because she's. done a ridiculous thing. she's done a ridiculous thing but I get. I get why a trans person would like shop. class because it's like we're building. things right everything can be built. yeah sure kids everything can be built. nothing's everything can be soldered. yeah and I get it I totally get it if I. was trans I would a class like that to. me I'd go this is good I'd want to teach. biology right I want to teach look what. we can build right but it's just when. you do it with such cartoonishly big.

tits then the world should have at the. world should because you want it. you want it if so here's what here's. what okay here's what just happened that. I really enjoy yeah I'd like to just. observe sure. so the whole time that I was making the. point about localized stupidity yeah and. why do it the whole time and I remember. that remember the last few minutes this. yeah. it's like we were sitting in this car. that you're sitting there you're just. ready to go yeah and the engine is going.

and I'm going like we don't need to do. this to people yeah it's too much it's. over over proportioned and you're going. uh-huh are you done okay and then you. went you just went this and then you. just did well a big yeah bit about this. lady because she it it needs to happen. yeah in fact when I view comedy as is. this weird like. you know these dumb [ __ ] who walk. around houses in L.A with sage burning. yeah and they go I'm like getting rid of. the energy so the house will sell yeah.

or whatever right oh yeah this is what. comedy is to me in in a weird way you we. need to kind of like there needs to be a. moment where everybody laughs at these. big tits yes and then we can all look I. can I could get with that on some level. you've got back-to-back meetings errands. to run shorts to take care of what's the. secret to clearing your to-do list folks. we know it it's doordash it is the. easiest thing in the world we've all had. experience with uh these carriers but.

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I mean what happens Bobby show the. goddamn tits because without the tits. It's academic. this woman did not get those tits to be. ignored she did not get those. no but she's got okay put it away. she has a body dysmorphia yeah but. she didn't want to be on the Tim Dylan. show oh I don't know about.

that she didn't want to be on the Tim. Dylan I don't know about that man those. did there you can't you get those to be. ignored. not but yeah by the you it's not the. point the point is you got something. tells you that that's what you need I. don't know but it's a very internal. thing. external thing yeah well it manifests. external yeah it's a very external thing. too I mean I get what you mean and I'm. not I'm not saying she shouldn't be no. listen here's the problem is that once.

things float up right to the comedy yeah. I get it and I have again my issue is. not with you no of course it really. isn't well of course. of course but by yourself. no of course of course no it couldn't be. me. um. I mean what I believe about comedy is. that there is no moral arrow in comedy. there's no moral up or down there's no. moral gravity and comedy that's what we. do and yes I do think that on some level. it's like. you're saging out all those serious [ __ ].

that got said about her yes and the. people I'm sure got really angry on both. sides well both sides the left and the. right tits any of the sides yeah and. either tit either one but uh I had I'd. just like to tell you a story about Sage. because I was once home and this woman I. get a knock on my door yeah and it's a. woman says hey I'm from next door the. house next door had sold recently right. she said I'm from next door and I was. wondering if I could borrow a pot. and a wooden spoon if you have that and.

I said I do I said it's so nice to have. you in the neighborhood right when like. uh like looks weird right I said do you. need anything else. salt or paprika or something you know. and she said no just pot in a spoon. and that gave them to her and then she. came back about two hours later and said. and gave them back to me. thank you and she was little. standoffish and she left. and then about a month later I get it I. see them all moved in I get a knock on.

the door a different woman she says hey. I'm your next door neighbor I just want. to say hi I said you guys came here to. get a pot and a spoon she said oh that. was a woman I hired to get evil spirits. out of the house right so she took a pot. from me and used the spoon to get evil. spirits into the pot and then gave it to. me I love belief systems because I love. the idea just think of that evil spirit. just a coupling of words evil spirit. will just go oh I don't like that herb.

like I'm out like if you're an evil. spirit Sage will do it that to me has. always been shocking like what people. believe. that's interesting yeah like if you're. an evil spirit and you're trapped in. this house yeah they're just some things. and you go I I can't I know I mean I. know I'm an evil spirit who's trapped. here because I was murdered in the. basement yes but if you if you like Sage. on fire I'm out of here it's just a. thing it's for your mind I think yeah. just to see you feel better about it.

before we get out of here there's an. article about people the overpopulation. is going to be concerned um going to be. fixed by metaverse children. this is a thing where people are going. to have children in the metaverse. because they're not actually there. they're not real and I and I wanted to. get get your I think anybody who. believes that yeah should absolutely. have a metaverse child instead of a. physical child that's right I think that. we should end. the DNA strand that believes that yes I. mean those there's those people that you.

know there's that thing. where they're all trying to get in the. Mainframe yes and live forever yeah. please do please do please all of you. yeah please upload yourselves yeah. they've already started it with meta is. a place that they're creating right so. they can go to it and live forever right. and by the way when you get canceled now. yeah you just you can live in your home. and feel okay right but in meta it's. going to be. Purgatory it's going to be they'll. actually send you to hell what's.

interesting is you could go to a. metaverse they're going to make a hell. of it the idea of that of course they. are damning you well that every day. because when you're once you're in. metaverse once that really becomes. existence right you're gonna have to. defend yourself there you're gonna. that's a great Point earn every day that. you belong that's a great Point all of. this mechanism of looking into. everything you've said and thought right. is going to be used to weigh where you. belong in the metaverse do you think. that they're really going to create a. metaverse without a hierarchy without a.

system of you I don't know right and. what happens to you in that matter well. you get a lot you they put they have a. room for the folks there's not going to. be a metaverse without Justice no of. course not so then. that's what all of this is practice for. interesting all of this stuff that we're. that they are doing now right small. parts of people right they're they're. and maybe it's a sage-like thing they're. getting it all into the thing into the. Mainframe and we can let all that go how. beautiful that would that be and then. we're just left with people walking in.

the streets don't we are actually using. their whole Personality yeah because the. the thing about. click bait cancel all this tweeting is. that it finds sectors of your person. right right I was talking about this on. another thing once that when you watch a. movie with your whole self you take your. entire body to a movie and you put your. phone down and you sit there and you. watch a film or a comedian or whatever. your whole self takes in the movie right. right your whole self isn't gonna like.

it there's parts of you that are going. to feel good. there's Parts either going to feel angry. there's Parts you are gonna you're gonna. have a mixed reaction because you're. using your entire multi-faceted human. Spirit right. and that's going to create conflict in. you I don't know how I feel about that. movie you talk to your friend about it. afterwards you go I don't like that he. did that at the end you know what I mean. uh but I liked it I don't know that's a. rich experience right but it's very rare. and for filmmakers and for Studios it's.

hard to know what thing is going to end. up with an aggregate positive you know. what I mean right but if you tickle one. part of somebody you know this is what. you think right and wrong is this is. what gets you off sexually this these. little parts of you that's a direct. [ __ ] touch that's like yes it's like. a drug right and you react to it and. it'll just keep getting more and more. and more and you'll just keep wanting. that more and more and more so that's. the the anger towards other people all. these things they hate and and and uh uh.

viral this and that it's just touching. little parts of each person and you. don't have to appeal to them that's why. everything's fragmented why no news. shows the big picture right and no news. story is really about here's what's. happening in Iran that's a big big story. big story of wide ranging for a long. time now this might There's an. opportunity in Iran for them to be like. a a a a cultured and complex nation that. we might actually be friends with right.

and why isn't you know like I saw Joe. Biden say. um. uh American Arms are flowing into the. Ukraine as I speak I saw him say that. proudly and I was like flowing flowing. as I speak he said that in Belgium when. I was in I was in Europe. and you know if there's a shooting war. and you send and you flow arms into it. more people get killed that's right more. people die yeah so and I know that the. young Progressive kids that have like.

the little Ukrainian flag on their on. their uh ID are very comfortable with. dead Russian soldiers right with like. charred face yeah they don't care loaded. body yeah like stuff like coming out of. a tank right like you know you you know. it's right go us you know whatever fine. but uh but some effort to not just say. out loud somebody Biden anybody yeah I. wish them well I hope you know at least. do what Trump used to do for people I.

wish them luck I love it I wish them. well the Iranian folks that are putting. their I wish some luck yeah and I don't. I don't know anything about it you know. it's not our job no it's not our job. it's our job to [ __ ] on all of it and. make fun of it and also just as. Americans too it's like we can sit it. out. we have a disease in this country where. you can't that's Ralph he owns the. studio I don't care because you were. here he came what he does is he came and. took a photo of this and he's gonna go. back and you see you see why I know and. because his account's gonna he's been. losing money for three years he's gonna.

go slowly CK the account's gonna go wow. I'm telling you right now we're in the. we're gonna die here you know a picture. of me is not a good proof of concept I I. beg to differ I beg that there it is in. this world if you're like me and you're. embarrassed that you don't know more. than one language you got to get on. Babel Babel is the language learning app. okay that has more than 10 million. subscriptions thanks to Babel's. addictively fun and easy. bite-sized language lessons you can.

finally cross learning that new language. off your list with Babel you only need. 10 minutes to complete a lesson so you. can start having real life conversations. in a new language in as little as three. weeks I've always wanted to learn uh. other languages I'm kind of embarrassed. I don't know them to be honest with you. but I'm using Babel to get over my. insecurity other language learning apps. use AI for their lesson plans but Baba. lessons were created by over 150. language experts and voiced by real. native speakers not computers with Babel.

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off your subscription to Babel I'm using. it right now to learn Spanish me guste. elado and that is very very good. babel.com Tim for up to 55 off your. subscription Babble language for life. um but no I I everybody should go see. you at your last show yes at Madison. Square Garden also I'm in Wembley Arena. Christ I'm at Wembley and this one I.

need to sell tickets to they're not. buying that many tickets sell them in. you got free Wembley Arena yes in London. October 4th this coming [ __ ] Tuesday. that's amazing and uh uh the night. before I'm at the Hammersmith Apollo. that's sold out that's been sold out for. amazing Wembley there's still I think 6. 000 tickets available for Wembley if you. are one of six thousand people in the UK. you gotta go to the store go to this. show in Wembley what are you doing I'm. going to do something shocking at that.

time he's going to do something I'm. trying to do something I'm I don't want. to Telegraph it of course but I might. commit suicide at that show Wembley. still buy tickets to the Garden think. about the ad rev that you will get on a. picture of Louis CK committing suicide. yes think about that because we. restricted we restrict the phones yes I. mean we don't put them in the settings. anymore I don't do that anymore okay I. just we tell them don't take it out but. during this. what I'm saying is that if you get a.

picture yeah. you'll be one of the few because we are. stopping people so that'd be worth a lot. of money it's worth a lot of money. please come to Wembley Arena also I'm. coming to Milwaukee I'm coming to. Atlanta uh New Orleans I'm thinking of. places that haven't sold out yet uh. Nashville I'm playing the Grand Ole Opry. in Nashville no October November. December 14th and I'm in Pittsburgh at a. place coming to Pittsburgh and uh uh all.

those [ __ ] all those [ __ ] places. and you can go on my website buy all. seven specials for five twenty five. dollars it's the best deal uh you can. buy my new movie Fourth of July yeah and. uh the series Louie that I made the best. it's not on anywhere but my website so. it's exclusive I got it exclusive they. took it off of Amazon and off of apple. and they gave it to me exclusively right. and the reason I asked him to do that. was so that I could set a price that. those people wouldn't have because you. have to always be the same price yes to. have like competitive parody whatever.

right so you only paid 30 bucks you you. get all five seasons and you can stream. them for the next five years so that and. Bobby Kelly made a special that I. directed I saw right now it's the best I. saw it you're lying and I appreciate it. no no I saw it he went into the bar okay. in in in [ __ ] Round Rock Texas. destroyed right and he destroyed yes and. it's amazing it's called kill bucks yes. and uh we just gathered people in this. box this old [ __ ] Factory in Tampa.

yeah and he went in there and he just. crushed yeah and so it's on my website. October 8th yeah uh for I think 10 bucks. and Bobby's coming on the show too he's. gonna be out good and I like my [ __ ] and. thank you by the way you're a big. supporter of this show people don't know. that but you're you you how do I support. it without people knowing though well. you just tell me that you think things. are funny yeah which to me is how you. should support it makes me happy I. listen to your show like I listen to it. like a regular person when I make my. breakfast well that makes me happy that.

you think things are funny so that's how. you say supported in front of you with. uh the woman in Chicago what's her name. the Lori Lightfoot The Lori Lightfoot. Tim Dylan yeah just Google Lori. Lightfoot Tim villain it's one of the. best pieces of audio Yeah. I appreciate it she's a um and you guys. found that too right wasn't that your. guys finds yeah for Yelp that she. reviewed a limousine company other. people knew about it and then the. through the you could tell through the. the the limousine companies reply that.

they it was all lies and someone found. but son your organization someone found. that we found it and your dissection of. it yeah I listened to it on on a tour. bus yeah. it's one of the funniest things ever. it's a great piece that's great. of journalists we try and uh you know. Lori is uh or the gift listen if I lived. in Chicago I'd probably be angry but I. don't so it's pure comedy I wanted to. win again yes I wanted a win-win-win. because there's some cheese there's. nothing better than a petty yeah kind of.

small even though Chicago is not a small. town but like a small town petulant. childlike dictator which is the way. she's incredible it's an incredibly. nothing is better than like a mean. lesbian who like gets infused with local. businesses nothing better than that. that's nothing local stupidity that's. local great level localized yes if if I. lived in Chicago I bet most I bet. Chicago local papers make way more money.

on her because in the morning they have. the crazy her with the eye yeah and it. says like guess what she did today. every [ __ ] like it's like uh the. Metro it's like the T in the 40s when. they show everybody with the newspaper. no it's it's absolutely what is it she. do now what is she doing it is wonderful. that America we have these characters we. have these characters nobody has better. characters no we are an amazing story. there's no way that you can create a. cast of characters the way this country.

has incredible Trump and Kardashians all. of these things and Lori Lightfoot it's. it's such a and you know and as when. again Winston wafts up to you yeah what. you do with it you should never hold. back no you shouldn't you I don't know. how yeah you there's no that's once it. gets to you it's too late that's right I. believe that that's right it is once. it's here yeah it's too late too late. it's time to go hard yeah for sure. [ __ ] dig in baby it's beautiful I.

love what you do very good Louis CK go. get everything he has why should I come. go to my website otherwise I can't do. this anymore. except my own industry now at Louis. ck.com buy all the [ __ ] give go give. them the money now yeah thank you all. right thank you sure man I appreciate it. it was fun.