Degree Of Difficulty | The Tim Dillon Show #365
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Tim. Dillon show. This is a. This is a tough one this week. This is. not the easiest one to do. Uh this is a high degree of difficulty. The routine uh if you ever watched a. gymnastics in the summer Olympics, when. they go, "The routine that uh she will. be. attempting this evening has a high. degree of difficulty. She stumbled many. times during practice.
She has a lot of maneuvers in there. she's unfamiliar with, and she had some. real trouble. She had real trouble. during practice. Let's see if she's worked those kinks. out. That's uh that's what we got today cuz. we've had a week. Um and no matter what. I say about anything today on this show, somebody's going to be upset that I. didn't say more, or I said the wrong. thing, or uh I mean something different. than what I said, or I don't have the.
facts. And if I had the facts, I'd think. differently. There's no way to avoid that. I'm one of the greatest minds of our. time, and and watching me in real time. put this together is got to be one of. the greatest joys in what I imagine uh. is a horrible life that you live on the. other end of that. uh camera. I don't know. I'm guessing. some of you are doing fine, but a lot of. you, let's be honest. And uh watching.
the mental dexterity me just jumping. i- into it, you know, no script, no. talking points. Barry Weiss, by the way, was supposed to come. and do the show, and and then ghosts me. at the last minute because it's been a. very bad week for Israel. I think it's. been a good week. uh for her career, not for her, cuz I like Barry, and I know it's a. horrible week for everyone that's Jewish.
and everyone that's been Jewish or knows. someone who's Jew. I get it. Uh but she's in demand. That's what I'm. saying. Do you see this is a high degree of. difficulty? I'm still on the balance. beam. I swayed a little bit. You thought. I was going to but I'm still on it. Um but no, I she's in demand. It's not a. good week for her. Someone I mean. What. I mean is that a lot of people are. calling her probably that far exceed the.
uh you know, reach that I have, for. example, even though my reach is. incredibly large. And she would be honored to be here and. should have texted me back. But I'm not. mad at her because I understand that it. is tough. But now here's what she gets. I'm going to do it on my own. I have my own ideas and I am going to go. with that now. She had the chance to come and and speak. her peace. Well, we'll start at the beginning.
There's something called the Bible. And no. As anybody uh everybody now knows, there. was a horrific attack in Israel. Hamas, which is a terrorist group, they're. running Gaza, but they can't do that. well. They're not good at that. They. They've proven that they're not bad at. terrorism. That's what they're good at.
But they're not they can't run Gaza. That which is their, you know, which is. the. I told you, folks. This is a This is. You've never seen anything like this. How impressed are you already? You've. never even been in a room with someone. capable of doing anything like what. you're about TO SEE. HAMAS. IS TERRORIST organization. that was actually. formed somewhat.
funded by Israel because Israel was. trying to discredit some more of the. moderate factions of the PLO. And which is the Palestine. Liberation. Organization. So Israel. was kind of funding Hamas the way that. we funded Al-Qaeda when it was the. Mujahideen against the Soviets in. Afghanistan. We built that.
So it's often these things happen, right? When you when you feed. you know, there are two wolves inside of. you. Which one do you feed? And where. when you feed something it can grow. There can be unintended consequences. Um so Hamas is this terrorist group and. we all. have some varying degree of familiarity. with Hamas. They are not the Palestinian. people. Uh they are not representatives.
of the Palestinian people. They are. terrorists. Um whose goal. is the erasure of Israel. They don't. want it to exist. They from the blank to. the sea, whatever. From the you know, that's the slogan. Again, Barry Weiss is. not here. So I'm doing all I can do. I'm. not I from what I got a lot of stuff I. got to do. I have a lot of projects. going on. I'm devoting my time to this. So I'm not going to have every eye, you. know, dotted and the point is.
from the what is the quote? From the. something to the sea. It's the quote they always say, which. means that there'll be no Israel. It'll. just be Palestine. From the river to the. sea. Is that they don't want Israel to exist? Uh Hamas. It's not like they wanted. two-state solution. They're not like trying to coexist. Um, they are. they want to eradicate Israel. And I don't think that's controversial.
Uh, you know, I think they would admit. that. I think they. kind of open about that. And then you see this crazy attack. They. are murdering women and children and. elderly people and and and concert-goers. that were at a music festival and. horrible ways, you know, it's it's. this. situation over there has made both sides. see each other as less than human. And the only way that you can do what.
Hamas did to people is if you see them. as less. than human. In the same way that if a Palestinian. uh, teenager, whatever, gets shot. in the West Bank or in Gaza by uh, an. Israeli security guard and member of the. military and they just kill somebody in. cold blood. The only way you can really. do that, the wanton slaughter of people, is if you see them as less than human.
Which is when you see stuff like that, cuz we're we're soft. I'm. pretty soft now. I I don't encounter. things like that ever, like in my real. day-to-day life, like. that type of violence, that type of even. hatred, that type of desperation. I I did when I when I when I was. um, uh, broke, I was uh, around a lot of. people or when I was doing drugs, I knew.
a lot of people who were desperate and. uh, more violent, you know, because that. comes with the territory of being a drug. addict. Um, that being said, to live a life like I live and most of. my friends live where we entertain. people, we make people laugh, we eat, we drink, we make merry, we have our. problems or whatever, but when you see. the vicious assault on infants,
on women, on on children, uh. it's unbelievable. It's unfathomable. that anyone could do that to anyone. else. Um. and that's what Hamas did. They They had. this attack that was. there's now conflicting reports of. whether Iran knew about it or was caught. by surprise, if Iran was funding it with the $6. million that they got in the Iran deal.
Um. nobody knows. People are. still seemingly pretty vague about like. what Iran knew and didn't know. Iran supports uh Hamas uh Hezbollah, which is a militia in. uh Lebanon. And so people are trying to put that. together. Um so we all wake up. This was uh last. Saturday. to this crazy [ __ ] I don't even do an.
episode. I go release the episode that we had in. the can with the guys from Are You. Garbage whom I uh adore. That was going to get held till I was in. Australia. I'm leaving for Australia. tonight. I'm I'm in California right. now. Today is Wednesday. Just in case. something happens tomorrow, I you want. to be when things like this happen, you. want to be clear about what you're. saying and when. Um so I just said I woke up and I'm. like, I really can't go in there and. make any type of joke about this. It's.
inhuman. I had to wait a few days to even process. and understand what was happening. Um. and uh so, you know, I'm just watching. all this stuff happen and it's. uh. my So, now, of course, Israel is, you know, there's a war. They've declared war. And. they're now in, you know, bombing Gaza. and they now there is. probably a humanitarian crisis on the.
other end where is Gaza civilians. are dying as well, just like Israeli. civilians died. This is war. This is. what happens. This is ugly. And. so I I few thoughts cuz I'm I'm watching. the reactions to this. on social media. And. the first thought that I had was that. it was very interesting, by the way, to. see people like Amy Schumer or or or. these other celebrities finally start. going like, "Well, these colleges are a. little uh liberal.
These colleges are a little woke, huh?". Cuz all over American colleges now. they're doing kill the Jews. Everywhere from Yale to Harvard. to Tufts where those guys were on. paragliders. going over the border into Israel and. then just shooting people randomly. And the kids at Tufts University were. like, "Well, that's kind of creative.". They were like, "That's pretty smart.". Um and those are things you say in your. dorm. Shh. You don't say them out loud.
But you don't But they're saying them in. like law reviews. They're writing them. down in. a pieces of paper that people can look. at years from now. Like, you know, I think the NYU came out and. was like, "All of the violence that's. going on is we laid on the doorstep of. Israel.". This is all of these colleges are now. saying, "Hey, decolonize." What do you think it looks. like? What do you think it means? It. means a couple of infants uh get killed.
Couple of women and children get killed. And this is really taken and Black Lives. Matter, by the way, put up a Get this up. They put up like a. meme. and they This is not even a thing. They. had to make this. They have a meme of a paraglider of a. guy. in the paraglider. thing going I stand with Palestine. Now, you have to remember, this is on the day. or maybe the day after that the news.
broke where you were seeing the most. vicious. horrific scenes you've ever. witnessed, really. I mean, really, really bad. Now, I'm not saying that. there aren't other things happening that. are just as bad or that if you looked, you could find them. I'm not I'm not a. naive [ __ ] You guys know that. You've. listened to this show, but this is in. your feed. You wake up, you got the. French toast in your mouth, AND YOU'RE. LIKE, "GOD!" It was. crazy.
Black Lives Matter Chicago goes and. tweets that. That That is all. That is it. And it's I stand with Palestine. God. bless. Now, all of these celebrities. had been duped for years. All you had to real- All you had to know. is know what a con is. I knew Black. Lives Matter was a con because I knew I. know what cons are. I worked in a. subprime mortgage office. I know what. cons are. I know the look and the smell.
and the shape of a con. A a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a. con is pretty identifiable if you if you. know one or if you've seen one or if. you've pulled one. And I knew exactly what that was. It was. this very, for example, Do Black Lives. Matter like the way it used to? Everybody goes, "Yeah." Like, of course. like, who's saying no? Right? So, but then when you did the. tiniest amount of research into it, it's run by these four women. They're. all avowed.
uh Marxist, meaning that they don't. believe in anything that people uh. you know, purport to believe in in this. country. They They think the nuclear. family should be abolished and. eradicated in favor of every the. government socially engineering and. managing everybody's life. That was on. the BLM website front page, but none of. these celebrities went there. None of them looked into any of the. information themselves. None of them. knew that that [ __ ] stole four houses.
And I'm I'm for that. But that [ __ ]. bought a bunch of houses with the money. that should have went to people's. families who died uh uh with in in uh in. shootouts with the police. So, this it's always been a scam. And the things that they've believed, they've concealed them with very like uh. friendly. uh you know, and non-controversial. [ __ ] uh you know, whatever you want.
to call it, logo, which was like Black. Lives Matter. Now, the mask is kind of. off. They're tweeting, "We're with Hamas." Essentially. You know, I stand with Palestine. Now, you can stand with Palestine. The idea that they should have a state. The idea that you should have a. two-state solution. The idea that the. settlements are crazy. The I'm going to. go into that in a minute. But the idea that you would tweet this. the day after. And now, all of these celebrities, and I. know some of these people. And and I and again, they're they're.
they're genuinely befuddled. They're confused. They don't They don't. get it. They. I I immediately get I'm shocked they did. that. I wouldn't have I don't know who. at the meeting said, "Let's tweet that.". But immediately, I'm like, "Hey, you. didn't know what they believed? You didn't know what they really. thought, but these people did it. So, that all of these people now, like I. got I saw Jessica Seinfeld do an. Instagram post today. She was like,
"These universities are liberal.". And I'm like, "Oh, okay. Hello, Jordan. Peterson. Welcome to reality.". Like, welcome to. the reality that most people live in. Anybody that pointed out that college. kids had gone a little nuts over the. past 4 years was harangued by these. people. They were called a boomer, out. of touch, a racist, a white supremacist, a xenophobe, uh a transphobe, a homophobe.
All of these people were like, "If you. can't get on board with college kids, they're always right. Every single. person I know was right in college. THEY. WHEN WHEN HAVE THEY EVER been wrong?". All my comedian friends on Twitter, my. writer friends that now live in tents, they were going, "What When When were. college kids ever wrong? They're always. on the right side of history. Why don't. you get with them?" And now the college. kids are literally at college going, "Kill the Jews! Kill the Jews!" And now. all of these people that gave these.
organizations money, this is a little. embarrassing, huh? Awkward. It's a little strange. All. these people in real time, they're. having like this weird awakening moment. where they're like, "Oh, okay.". Cuz remember how simple everything was. during 2020, how simple and easy it was. It was the wrong side of history and the. right side of history. Part of the. problem, part of the solution. Took a. page out of the Bush doctrine, good or.
evil, with us or against us. Now, people. are starting to go, "Wait a minute. Uh. these these college kids are a little. out of control. They're a little out of control. Um. again, this says nothing about the. political reality of the situation, which is. not good. Very difficult, folks. You can see right now on the floor. exercise with Mr. Dylan excels at is. artistry. He's the artistry of what he. does sometimes is more than the.
technical and sometimes the judges. actually give him some points for that. He's actually puts on a real show for. the crowd. He puts on a real show for. the crowd and you could see the crowd. getting into it. He hasn't really. completed the same type of technical. feats that other people have, but he. really puts on a show for the crowd and. he reminds them that he is a performer. Um Israel is The problem with Israel. kind of has always been they've never. been like, "Hey, here are the borders. Here's where we're at.".
They they they kind of have always been. a little cute with their borders. They. expand, they build settlements, they go into areas where Palestinians. can take deeds out and go, "I've owned. this property. I've owned this land. I've been here forever." and they evict. Palestinians and Palestinians are now. homeless. and they're impoverished and this is a. huge problem and a lot of people are. against this. And unfortunately, it doesn't seem like.
America whole we give Israel a ton of. money, but we don't hold them to. account. Like we don't demand certain. things of them. We we we have in the. past. Bush one did a little bit. Like. There are times when we have said, "Listen, we need to. the idea of a two-state solution, the. idea of like They said, "But what we. really do is we give them a lot of money. and then kind of look the other way and. go, 'Do whatever you want.'" And they. expand the settle, you know, they expand.
the borders of Israel, these settlements. and and and whatnot. And this this this. Gaza Strip that Palestinians live in. under this this siege, this blockade, occupation, whatever you want to call. it. They're living in this. I I it's an incredibly. densely populated region where you. cannot get a lot of things in that you. would need to survive. They cannot. leave. They're not allowed to leave. Like one of the things Netanyahu is. like, "Well, the civilians, I'm telling.
you now to leave. This We're going to. bomb you. You got to leave." Where are. they going to Where are they going? Palm. Beach? Where are THEY GOING TO GO? THEY. CAN'T THEY CAN'T GO ANYWHERE. WHERE ARE. THEY GOING TO GO? THERE'S NOWHERE FOR THEM TO GO. NOW, I'M. NOT saying Israel doesn't have a right. to defend If that happened anywhere in. America, we'd be doing what they're. doing. But the other thing I wanted to comment. on was. as soon as this happened and and now. I've seen all these people's statuses. and they're like, "We remember the. silence, the people who were silent.".
And you go, "Well, what Wait a minute. Hold on. Hold Wait. Hold the phone a. minute. What do you want me to say? What do you really want people to say? Israel's going to defend. itself, no matter what I say. There's They don't need me. They don't need Instagram comments to. defend themselves. They're going to go do that. They're going to do whatever they want.
And I understand after a heinous attack. like that, there's justification for. what they do. Now, now what they do and. how far it goes, you can evaluate, whatever, but. this whole idea that everybody needs to. speak up and be heard and be counted, no, you don't know what people are going. to say. Listen, let people stay quiet. It's. actually good. Even if they agree with you, if people agree with you, still have.
THEM SHUT UP. THEY MIGHT HURT YOUR CAUSE. THEY MIGHT HURT your cause. I've seen a. lot of pro-Israel people not help. Recently, I I checked in I check on all. the social media sites to see what's. going on. And I know a lot of my Long. Island friends will look they should. just genocide THEM ALL OVER HERE. AND. IT'S LIKE THAT'S JUST NOT HELPING. But they're pro-Israel. So, the people. that agree with you sometimes are often. the people you want to go shh.
shh. You don't need everybody standing up and. talking. We know Listen, nobody is. outside of your kids at college nobody's. applauding this at time. I mean, some. people are. You know, but even Gigi Hadid said no. She goes, "I'm not Like can you get Gigi. Hadid or Bella Hadid Get one of the. Hadid statements up because it was. actually very nice. She did a great job.
My thoughts are with those. Uh. it's too long. Here's my point. I'm not. doing this for you. She's saying, "Hey, you can't do it.". But she's also saying She's kind of. doing what I'm doing. You know, but I'm doing it in a better. way, I think. But she's saying, "Hey.". That's what she's saying. That in a. word, that's what she's saying. It's a. three-paragraph thing. But if if it had.
to be a tone, it would be this. "Hey.". "Hey.". It would start up and then go down. It. would go be like, "Hey." And it would. kind of would have the guttural ENDING. OF LIKE. UH. YOU KNOW, I DON'T KNOW LISTEN, SO you. have now a situation where everybody on. social media is like, "We will remember. the silence of you." And you go, "Good. Please, because the the the talking is. no good." That's not going to help your. case.
This is a. Like listen, and then people are like, "Well, it shouldn't be complicated.". Well, I understand that. But it is. Everything is complicated. Nothing is not complicated. Yes, is stabbing a woman in her face. complicated? No, that's bad. Now we're. in a debate of whether the infants. really got beheaded. There's no evidence that the infants got. beheaded. Yeah, there is evidence that the infants.
got beheaded. Joe Biden said they got. beheaded. No, they were just killed. Nobody. beheaded them. Well, actually, if you see the blood. SPLATTER PATTERNS, IT'S CONSISTENT WITH. A BEHEADING. NO, NO IT'S NO ONE GOT. BEHEADED. IT'S LIKE IN IRAQ WHEN THEY. SAID babies were in incubators. And this. goes on all day. I don't These are the. people you want speaking up? These are the people you want talking to. people who were 50 paragraphs on the.
whether the kids GOT BEHEADED OR NOT? THAT'S WHERE WE ARE? AND IF THEY ARE. BEHEADED, WHY IT WAS KIND OF MAYBE A. LITTLE NECESSARY. WELL, THE BEHEADINGS. MAY HAVE HAPPENED, BUT WHAT? SO, THESE ARE ALL THE PEOPLE that you. want adding their voices to the great. chorus? The last thing you want is people. talking about this. Quiet down.
Quiet down. Especially Israel cuz they're going to. have they're going to have to go in. there. They're going to do they're going. to do a little stuff in there now in. Gaza. They're going to get what? Now, this is. awkward for me. The man who planned this. whole thing. Daif, get him up. I think his name is. Muhammad. I don't know if his last name. is Daif. They call him the guest. He's. the head of. Hamas. He's the head of Hamas. And he is a.
He's a like a they call him the ghost. The guest, the ghost, whatever. He He's. the ghost because he's. They can't get him. Muhammad Deif. Secret of Hamas commander known as the. guest is Israel's prime target in this. war. This is a guy they have not been. able to find forever. Forever. Over the past two decades, Israel has tried to assassinate Muhammad. Deif several times, maiming him in. attacks and killing his wife and baby. son. The commander of the armed wing of Hamas.
on Saturday inflicted in return one of. the deadliest ever Palestinian blows on. Israel. The brutality of the attacks by. Izz ad-Din al-Qassam Brigades directed. by Deif have shocked even hardened. Israelis. Militants mowed down revelers. at a music festival, murdered entire. communities of people on the Gaza border. at da da da da da da da da da da da da. We know that. There's little doubt. though that Deif is now in the. crosshairs. The Israelis on Wednesday, Israeli air strikes hit the home of one. of his family members, killing his.
brother. uh and his brother's wife and children. according to Palestinian media reports. and people in Gaza. A spokesman for. Hamas didn't respond to a request for. comment. In the end, we will get not. only him but the entire leadership of. Hamas. So they're going after this guy. He's And I'm not even saying this. He's renting my house in Austin and has. been for literally 8 months. And is a And he's he's an actually a. good tenant. To a point where I'm I. don't know if I'll call.
I don't know if I'll call because he's. actually been fine. He mows the gra-. Like he's It's He's actually He's a man. of faith. He's quiet. No, I don't I don't uh. I don't know if they'll get him, but. that's who they want. He's the guy that planned this whole. thing. This They'll probably get him. They're going to get everybody. So, it's an ugly reality now where the you. know, is anyone ever going to be able to.
peacefully live over there together next. to each other two-state solution. anything? Is anybody ever going to be. able to live over there in a way. that people can you know, just is it. ever ever ever going to happen? I. it you know, maybe it will. Maybe it will. But it it looks like this is kind of a. line in the sand here. Where it's going to get increasingly. difficult. And this war, we're only a. few days in.
More stuff's going to happen. Um. so I mean they're they're calling for. this Hamas day of jihad on October 13th. I'll tell you one thing that's safe, American colleges. Nobody is killing those kids. That's. little Hamas over there in Tufts. These kids just want to be cool. They're. weird asexual freaks. They take pills. all day and then they see these guys on. paragliders going in and killing people.
and these kids are like, [ __ ] I just. want to do something. That's the problem. And and and finally. people are starting to realize that like. what they are teaching in college not. this is again, it's not about. per se Palestine or is it but what they. are teaching about like. what. is tolerable and justifiable violence. is wild and people are now kind of just. coming around to that. This idea that. during uh.
you know, the 2016 election, it was go. punch a Nazi, punch anyone that. disagrees with you. Find somebody who disagrees with you, you can attack them. Words are violence, respond in kind, respond with violence. Conservative speaker shows up on campus, you don't like that, try to kill them. You know, I mean the the Ben Shapiro, all these little guys. Ben Shapiro is. like what, 120 lb soaking wet? He walks. into a room and the entire college. of people is trying to kill the guy. And. this was all And then people on the left.
said this is okay. Well, where do you. think these kids got these [ __ ]. ideas? Somebody goes to a college to speak and. they're allowed to go and physically. intimidate them and threaten them and. and attack them violently and everybody. in the media goes, "Well, that's good.". And then something like this happens and. everybody's shocked that these kids. think this is a great thing, that this. is actually a justifiable thing to. slaughter people like this. Um. I you know.
Yeah, so everybody October 13th they're. saying is the day. I don't know what. I don't know what. I don't know what. It was funny is there's article about. Hamas, but if you scroll down there's. actually. it says master the steps to grow your. career as a CFO. And then it says leadership, vision, confidence, management, strategy, teamwork. And I'm like, if Hamas is that. organized. Like I was like, if Hamas is actually.
that organized where they're like. vision, confidence, management. But they're going to they're going to. recruit people. This is going to be a. global recruitment campaign. Um I'm just hoping I'm all for less. death. Less war, less death. Some type of negotiation, cooler heads. prevailing eventually. I understand that Israel's got to go and. respond. I understand that. But also we do have to think long game.
here. You know, what what's. what is this going to end up being? This is a region that is never going to. be peaceful. It will never be peaceful. for as long as we're on Earth, it's. probably going to be a volatile, combustible region forever. It's just a matter of how volatile, how. combustible. Is it going to spill over. into a world war? Some people were like, well, maybe. Russia is trying to get Iran to get to.
bait the US in a war. And trust me, war. is the best thing for our economy. It. always has been. So, anybody thinking. that, I mean, I know people on Twitter. writing that, people who think they know. anything. Um, I don't think Russia had. to bait. China. I could be wrong, but I don't. know if Russia had to bait Iran into. funding Hamas, who's been doing it for. years. Or I didn't know if they if they. if Russia had to bait Hamas into doing. something that I believe they'd been.
planning for years and wanted to do for. years and. finally had the opportunity to do it. And a lot of people that knew An article. just came out in the New York Times. about why Israel's security system. failed. This is a one of the most secure. places, supposedly, on the planet. And. everybody's like, why the hell didn't. this work? You know? Israel's military and espionage services. are considered among the world's best, but on Saturday, operational and. intelligence failures led to the worst. breach of Israeli defenses in half a. century. When anything like this.
happens, people immediately start. thinking, is it a false flag in the. sense, not is it a false flag, but was. it allowed to happen? Was this allowed. to happen? I don't know anything. I'm. not suggesting that. I'm saying when. something so good fails, people start going, hey man, what why? Shortly before attackers from Gaza. poured into Israel at dawn on Saturday, Israeli intelligence detected a surge in. activity on some of the Gazan militant. networks it monitors. Realizing something unusual was.
happening, agents sent an alert to the. Israeli soldiers guarding the Gazan. border, according to two senior Israeli. security officials. But the warning wasn't acted upon either. because the soldiers didn't get it. or the soldiers didn't read it. Shortly afterward, Hamas, the group that. controls Gaza, sent drones to disable. some of the Israeli military cellular. communication stations and surveillance. towers along the border, preventing the. duty officers from monitoring the area. remotely with video cameras.
The drones also destroyed. remote-controlled machine guns that. Israel had installed on its border. fortification, removing a key means of. combating a ground attack. So this was a. very well-planned, well-executed attack. That made it easier for Hamas assailants. to approach and blow up parts of the. border fence and bulldoze it in several. places with surprising ease, allowing. thousands of Palestinians to walk. through the gaps. These operational failures and. weaknesses were among a wide array of. logistical and intelligence lapses by.
the Israeli security service that paved. the way for the Gaza incursion into. southern Israel, according to four. senior Israeli security officials who. spoke on the condition of anonymity in. order to discuss this sensitive matter. and their early assessment of what went. wrong. So they had a good day. This is the. Hamas having a good day. It all worked, you know? I mean, truly, that's what. that's what it is. It worked, you know? They. had all these ideas and they didn't know. if these things were going to work, but. they actually worked and it was.
obviously a bloody and terrible day, but. for them, you know, when you when you are trying. to pull off something of that on on this. level, the fact that all of these things. happened and you didn't hit a snag. anywhere. is somewhat impressive. So now Israel's. retaliating. Let's look at the Gaza. Strip right now. Do you have a live Gaza. Strip? Do you have anything live we can. pull up? See where cuz the Gaza Strip is. not doing well. Israel's pounding it, obviously. Um.
because they are now trying to take out. Hamas leadership, but you know, they're. going to take out a bunch of people. Anyway, there's going to be a lot of civilian. casualties, a lot of kids. Which is hard. This is This is the tough part. You know, this is the part that. everybody. even the staunch. supporters of Israel all should, you.
know, have said like. let you know, is there a safe passage to. Egypt for some of the refugees here? Is there a way to get them out of harm's. way? Because nobody can be. happy about the murder of women and. children and you know, but one thing. about military age men, still not great. You still have to examine your head if. you're really thrilled about the death. of anybody. But when you're celebrating the deaths. of the elderly or women or children or. infants, there's something very sick.
You you've dehumanized your your enemy, which is. what has happened here for for a very. long time. And I don't And here's what I will say. and this is unfortunate and people are. not going to be happy with this, but I. do I don't think that's one-sided. I. don't think the dehumanization is. one-sided. I think both of these people. see each other as less than human. And I see them both as less than human. Because I'm a white Christian man. We. are the ones who win.
No. Uh, but what I'm saying is get the. Christians back in, PLEASE, AND GET THEM. ALL OUT. GET THEM ALL OUT. THE CHRISTIANS ARE. COMING BACK. MY FAT AUNT AND HER. HUSBAND, THEY'RE GOING TO THE HOLY LAND. CUZ THEY RESPECT IT. THEY'RE NOT GOING. TO DO WHAT THE PALESTINIANS DO. They're. not going to stone gays. AND THEY'RE NOT. GOING TO DO WHAT THE Israelis do, do a. BUNCH OF TECH STARTUPS AND THEN NOT LET. ME HOST THE DAILY SHOW. WHAT MY AUNT AND. UNCLE ARE GOING TO DO IS THEY'RE GOING. TO WALK AROUND THE CAVE OF THE whatever.
and THEY'RE GOING TO [ __ ] EAT CHURROS. or you know, whatever hummus or whatever. the hell. let the Christians back in here, okay? Because apparently they need to come. back. BECAUSE. BOTH OF YOU NO GOOD. NO GOOD. I WAS THINKING ABOUT GOING to Israel and. now I'm not EVEN GOING TO GO. I WAS THINKING ABOUT DOING A TRIP NEXT. SUMMER. AND I WANTED TO GO TO GAZA TOO.
You know me, I wanted to go everywhere. I could be one of those sheiks. Ray looks like the blind sheik from with. the eye from 9/11. But but my point is that maybe. and I know there's Christians that live. there, but I don't mean them. I mean. middle American Christians, give it to. them. Give it to like the Sarah Palin types. You know, the people that live in the. middle of America. Get them and put them. there. And they're not going to have this. problem. They're just going to do dumb [ __ ].
They're going to get fat. They're going. to take cruises. They're going to. commercialize the [ __ ] out of it not in. a successful way like Israel, but in a. gross way like they've done to Orlando. Let them do that. Let them do that. THE PALESTINIAN LITTLE CHILDREN would. love my aunt and uncle. They would walk around the Gaza Strip. with pretzels and feed them like a. petting zoo. And it would be it'd be nice. My aunt. would look phenomenal in a burka. So.
would her husband. And uh because this I'm a little to to. be honest with you, I I'm a little fed. up with everybody. I'm a little mad with every I'm more mad. at Hamas now because they're being a nut. now. But I'm a little fed up with everybody. I think it's high time that the. Christians come back. How about that? And bring our food LIKE. PORK AND PASTA. WHAT ABOUT THE ROMANS?
ROMANS coming back. Because we do though, we need. the Vatican needs to come back here and. and and and whip this planet back into. shape. If the Vatican would just get involved. they're closing up on something now. I. wonder what's about to happen. This is crazy. You're watching people. get bombed. This is crazy. And then. there's going to be an ad for Chobani. Flips. In the middle of this there's going to. be an ad. They're going to be like, do. you like yogurt on the go? Chobani's not.
only fun and flavorful, it's chock-full. of probiotics. And then you're going to. go, "Oh, it's good." And then you're going. to turn around and then they're going to. just it's going to be like hospital. school. And it makes you watching this stuff. [ __ ] your head up. It's really it's. really really terrible. And it's not. something that is is really avoidable. unless you really are going to be crazy. Like imagine the people that don't even. know this is going on. They're the real. crazy people.
They're like, "What are you talking. about?" Like, "What do you think's going. on in the Middle East?" They're like, "What? The what?" Morgan & Morgan is America's. largest injury law firm. They have 100. offices nationwide, more than 800. lawyers. With over 15 billion dollars. recovered for over 300,000 clients, Morgan & Morgan has a proven track. record of fighting to get you full and. fair compensation. Morgan & Morgan has. been fighting for the people for over 35. years. Submitting an injury claim with Morgan &. Morgan is so easy. Blank is hard. Submitting Oh god, this crap. If you're ever injured, you could check.
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use the code Tim Dillon today and sign. up for your free 60-day trial. That's. shipstation.com code t i m d i l l o n. What are the celebrities saying? Where. are they on this? Which ones? Where all of them? What do you mean which ones? Oh, Noah. Schnapp chimed in today. I know. He's a. sweet guy. I feel bad. What do you want? YOU KNOW. FOLKS, I GOT FANS EVERYWHERE. I GOT FANS ON THE. STRAP. YOU DON'T THINK ANYBODY'S PAYING FOR.
THAT PATREON ON THE STRAP? I GOT PEOPLE ON THE STRAP. Thousands of strap. But, I also have. people in Tel Aviv. Noah Schnapp, it was a lovely statement. He said we're all we all got to stop. with the you know we we go. It's all a version of be nice. Right. We. should all be nice. He's a sweet guy. What's he going to. say? Mhm. You know? He's you know his family's there. He. goes there. He has fun.
Mia Khalifa for the porn stars out there. in a you know getting a [ __ ] in a. paraglider. I mean it's. A lot of them are putting out statements. and then retracting them like the one I. did on my Instagram that was really. funny which was like literally this is. the way celebrities talk. Go to my. Go to my Instagram page cuz this is what. this is like what celebrities when they. talk this is what they sound like. because literally.
Not all celebrities. Some of them are. quite smart but a lot of them are. incredibly dumb and and you don't know. how dumb they are. You would you would. you would lose faith in everything. immediately if you knew how dumb people. were. But there there exists an apparatus of. people to prevent you from ever finding. out how dumb they are. That's the thing. Everyone thinks. they're evil and some of them are. But a lot of them are just just dumb. like. finding out a few of them are evil is. people live with that. They go yeah yeah.
yeah they're so they're diabolical. Okay. But finding out how genuinely. stupid a lot of them are. They're so rich and so successful but I. mean god are they [ __ ] dumb. That. would disturb That would bother them. more. Um and this is the way they talk and. this is I kind of parodied this. I'm. like I've been thinking a lot about the. events of the last few days and I am. disgusted by the hatred. I believe in. love and that we need love because love. is what makes life worth living. So to.
the people who hate I say maybe just. love. And maybe the stars will will just a. little bit brighter because that's what. love does. It makes the stars remind us. of how beautiful they are. And the. oceans, and forests, too. And all the. living things. And I'm sorry I posted those five other. reactions my team took down. This is. what I meant to say. I like oceans. Thank you. That's what That's the mind. you're dealing with with a lot of these. celebrities. But a a lot of them have, you know, to their credit started to.
realize. Now, for example, the Palestinians that are surrounding. the Sydney Opera House. go and gas the Jews. Guess who's not allowed to perform the. Sydney Opera House? Hi. Hi, Diana. How are you? Oh, it's. good. Welcome back. Here. Come come here. and sit in your Beverly Hills little mug. you like. Let me tell you a story, okay, Diana? All right. But I'll have a few things to say about. Israel and Pal- Hey, hey, hey. Hey, hey,
hey. It's not I don't think it's a No, no, no, but I. You know, I was dating a man No, I know, but we can't right now this is not. productive. Okay? Let me tell you Do you. know the Sydney Opera House? Oh, yes, it's in Australia. Yes, they would not let Tim Dillon. perform there. Really, what? Is it because you say bad. stuff about the Ukraine war? Kind of, yes. But you know who they let You know who. they let outside? All the Palestinians chanting gas the.
Jews. Oh, wow, that's interesting. So, you and. allowed to prevent By the way, people. think that I've had a total mental. collapse, you know, if they watch this. Like if they want Like if By the way, if. you watch this, you would think this is. a guy that's had a total mental col- I'm. actually Here's what's crazy, I'm very. successful. That's actually more distur- I'm like. incredibly successful at this dumb thing. I do, but this literally, if you just. saw this, like if someone walked in. here, they would go, "This guy's totally.
lost." And I kind of have, but they. wouldn't, you know, My point is that. they got the Palestinians or who I'm not. blaming them. I don't know who's over. there, but they're in Sydney screaming. "Gas the Jews" outside of the opera. house. They will not even let me perform. at the opera house. Okay? Get What What were they chanting? Gas. the Jews, YEAH. GAS THE JEWS. NOW, HERE'S WHAT'S IRONIC. MY ONE-MAN show that I'm DOING IS CALLED. "GAS THE JEWS.".
THAT'S THE NAME OF THE. You're not going to get away with jokes. like that forever. I don't know anymore, folks. I'm just. telling you what I'm what I'm. where I'm at with everything. The kids in colleges have gone insane. They are fetishizing violence. They're justifying anything. This We're. on stolen land shit's got to stop. A lot.
of countries or were were founded. uh in in in ways that were not uh you. know uh. however you want to call it ideal. That doesn't mean they don't have a. right to exist. It does mean perhaps. they can't expand and and continually. evict people. I agree with that. But Israel has a right to exist like the. United States has a right to exist. This. we're on stolen land is the dumbest I'm. about to leave America, go to Australia. where literally every time the plane. lands you know, "Welcome to Sydney." And.
they go, "We like to give a Whatever. they say." They're like, "We like to. acknowledge the past, present, future. guardians of the land." The indigenous. And you go, "Hey guy, will you cut it. the [ __ ] out? CUT IT OUT. CUT THEM. CHECKS. Stop with this horse [ __ ] Cut. them checks. Cut them checks. Give them. casinos. Give them museums. Whatever you. want to do. Don't make them live in in a. in a nightmare situation, but stop. No. one's giving the land back. Stop with. the stolen land, dummies. The dumbest.
people in the world go, "We're on stolen. land." Yeah, most of us are. It's the dumbest thing ever that [ __ ]. fat white women say when they've run out. of things to say. They're like, "We're. on stolen land.". Yeah, so and you're going to leave? I'm just saying these guys got to figure. it out. They got to figure it out. I'm not going. to be. You're not going to find someone.
as articulate as me. You know what I mean? You're just. usually someone's just going to go start. killing people. But, what I'm offering is the third way, the way of speak the talk, the speaking. I'm offering the. you know, sort of the you know, just. kind of fireside chat. where everybody can figure it out. And this is murder. It's not, you know, we cannot. call this anything else, right? We.
cannot. We cannot say that this is some type. People are messaging me all day. Everybody's got a problem. Um. We cannot excuse this. We don't have to agree with the. government of Israel. You can't excuse. the behavior. That's the you know, If you go to Tufts University, you. [ __ ] [ __ ]. You could who's never been in a. fistfight in your life, you cannot. excuse the behavior in the same way you. cannot also long for an unending you. know, war in Gaza that kills all of the.
people that live there. You can't I I understand revenge is what. people want. I understand that. For a. brief period, that's going to happen. The security system, you know, is necessary to shore that up. It's necessary to diminish Hamas'. ability to do this again. We all get it. But, you know, you you you have to Yeah, tough students for justice in Palestine. group is ripped for obscene comments. about a massive terrorist attacks in.
um. Israel. Well, there's a lot of Jewish. people that give these schools money. You know who's not giving Harvard money? My mom and dad. You know who's not giving Yale money or. NYU money? My family. So, all the Jewish. people that give these [ __ ]. people money, maybe put your wallet back. in your pants. How about that? That. might work. Because there's not going to be That's. who you're getting the money from.
You know, they're not getting it from. me. I dropped out of community college, as. you may have noticed by this 45-minute. up-and-down rant. What he's done here. with this routine, which is kind of. really uh just a technical thing that he. does, is he he he's spaced out these. maneuvers quite far from each other. So, it really gives the judges a chance to. enjoy each one of them on its merits. A. lot of people put them together so that. they could kind of get them over with.
But, what he does is he does one and. then takes a while to just kind of throw. it to a little bit of a crowd-pleasing. dance before he does another. It's a. riskier move, but he seems more. comfortable that way. I'll tell you this, folks. Um. I have no um wish for anyone to be. harmed. And that's the thing. I I have a lot of. Jewish friends that are beside. themselves. Um. And I know a lot of people that take a. different, you know, they have a. different view that of the crisis over.
there because they're Muslims, they're. Arab, and they've grown up with entire. different education. And. you know, there's not going to be a solution here. that anybody thinks about right now. What we should prevent is a nuclear war. We should prevent a nuclear war. We. should prevent World War III, a larger. war. We should prevent.
uh. innocent people getting killed on either. side. We should. try to envision uh. you know, what we can do to make that. region. less volatile. But, it doesn't see It. doesn't with the being honest with you, you're my audience, I'm going to be. honest. I don't think it's ever going to. work. I don't think it's ever going to work. Like, I don't know if you would bring in. all these people from all over the world. into America that have all these. different cultures. Some of them are.
going to assimilate and respect Western. culture. Some of them will not. And you're going to have to deal with. that. And they're going to be chanting. death to this one and death to that one. And. you know, there is just not much you're. going to be able to do. if you bring in all of these different. cultures with the hope. that some of them. are going to assimilate because cultures. have assimilated in the past. That seems to be the hope. But, then.
some of them are going to chant gas to. Jews. outside of the opera house. So, everybody that says, "Well, if we. said one thing about immigration." If. people said, "Well, immigration might. have some negatives.". Every person, every celeb, every left. shitlib on Twitter was like, "What do. you mean, you Nazi scum?". And they were like, "No, everybody comes. to to these places for the same reason. They Because their daughter wants to see.
Barbie." Like. And then. fast forward, those some of those people. are chanting gas to Jews. outside of a opera house. Are they being good Australians? Is that Is It hasn't been a stellar week. for multiculturalism. It just hasn't been. It doesn't mean. there can't be a better weeks. There can. be some good weeks.
This has not been a great week. for multi Doesn't mean. that it's a completely doomed project. It means that you're just going to live. with some level of it not working out. quite as well as you thought. It's like a marriage. It's just NOT. GOING TO WORK OUT QUITE AS WELL AS YOU. THOUGHT BECAUSE when you're high and. you're just tweeting and you're like, "Everyone's coming to my country to. listen to my cunt." Which is what all. these people thought.
Everybody thought everybody WAS COMING. HERE. THEY WANT TO SEE YOU, TOO, at the. sphere, JUST LIKE WE DO. AND THEN SOME OF THEM ACTUALLY JUST. wanted to go and chant gas the Jews. That's what some of them wanted to do. Did Was there Was there Was that a test. when everybody came in? Was there Was there What's your idea of. a fun Saturday night? Are you a Are you a homebody or do you. want to go outside the opera house and. yell, "Gas the Jews"?
Just live with it not working out quite. as well as you thought. If you think it's a good idea to keep. invading, as Steve Sailer said, you. might not like Steve Sailer. Most of you. retards don't know who he is. Here's the. point. The people that would hate me for. mentioning his name. don't know who he is. Here's the point. If you're going to continually invade. the world and then invite the world, if you're going to knock over all these. countries, prop up all these dictators, the Middle East does cling to some an. archaic form of religion,
a theocracy, but a lot of that's because. we propped up a lot of these goons to. begin with cuz they were doing business. with us. So, they oppressed their people. and kept their mouths shut, and they. were able to do our bidding and work. with our multinational corporations. Iran is a perfect example from that. You. look at a progressive country that goes, you know, that turns on a dime and now. is a is a huge problem, an incubator of. fundamentalist philosophy. If you keep. doing this, if you keep knocking over. these countries for the small benefit of.
a small group of people that live in. America, the people that really feast on. the on the corpse of the dying empire. You know, like the people that are. really really making And it's not just a. small group, by the way. And that's the. other misconception. You know, there's a lot of people making. money off this empire. It's not just. It's not just the guy The ones at the. top make more than the rest of us. But if we all want to adjust our. lifestyles. downward, you can go to countries that. military-industrial complex. They have.
one nice restaurant called Noma, and. they live in tiny little boxes, and they. eat caterpillars, and they have a nice. Christmas market, and it's called Norway. or Denmark. It doesn't matter. The point. is, if you want to live in a 6,000. square-foot house in the middle of Texas. where none of the rooms are unused, and. drive a big car that you can get into an. accident in even if you're drunk and. you'll still be okay cuz you can't. afford the spinal surgery that you're. going to need if you flip it. If you. want to live that type of life, if you. want to spend thousands of dollars on.
high-interest rate credit card revolving. debt TO BUY GARBAGE FAT CHAIRS for your. disgusting family to sit in. If you want. to go out to restaurants like Maggiano's. and the Cheesecake Factory and eat. plastic lasagna full of poison every. day, SOMEONE'S GOT TO PAY for that. Someone's got to pay for that kind of. life. Okay? And it's not just. the people at the top that take a lot of.
the spoils of the way we've lived, but. if you're going to keep going out into. the world and knocking these places over. and then inviting everybody in. and HOPING IT WORKS OUT. AND GOING, WELL, it might Well, it might. Well, it'll be an adventure. It'll be an adventure and then keep. making movies. and you know, that romanticize. whatever.
This collision of cultures, that's fun. It's sexy and fun. But it's not so much fun when people are. chanting gas the Jews outside of the. opera house that will not let me. perform. So, that's really. the way it looks. It's not only the way. it looks, it's the way it is. We've invited a lot of these issues. here. We've brought them here. Our unending, unwavering support for. Israel without giving them any hardline.
in the sand instructions saying we you. cannot. expand, you cannot do this, you cannot. do that. American. uh money will not be there if you do. these things. Um. also. having an immigration policy. that just basically says, "Hey, if you. can cheat your way into this country, you can live here. If you can cheat your way in, you can. live here. We don't really care what you. believe. We assume you love us.
We assume you love us and everything we. love, that's why you're here. We assume. you love us. That you're coming because you. love us. That's what we assume cuz we're. narcissists. No matter what we are, we. are narcissists and it is it is. impossible to believe. that you wouldn't be coming here just. loving us. Don't you love us? But apparently not everybody loves it. Not everybody loves us and not. everybody's here. uh. to go to the fright night.
Not everybody's there to go to the. [ __ ] Halloween spooktacular. haunted house. Some people are there to. chant gas the Jews. Yeah, I mean, that's what it is. So, all the people that. uh say only positive things about. uh. these um. experiments. These large-scale social experiments, which is what immigration is at to a.
certain point. It becomes an experiment. We're trying. it out. We try it out. And it might work. It It's worked in the. past to certain degrees. for certain people more than others, but. it certainly worked, and now we're. going, "Well, this might work, too.". It may. It may not. But really, my final word here. is love. We need a gun Do we need it or not?
We need it, and I don't you know, I just. don't We need a gun that shoots it. We need a gun that shoots love. If I was. God, if I was God, I would just every. It would It would just be a big party. over there. If I could make Israel a big party, if I. could get every American corporation to. just go into the Gaza Strip and just. make it into a big mall, so that they could enjoy it. Everybody.
could work at a Lowe's and be divorced, you know? Cuz that's the best The best reality in. America is just to work at a Lowe's and. be divorced, and have a kid that doesn't hate you. I mean, if Sure, people do better than. that here, but on average, on average, the best you can do in our country. is to work in a Lowe's that is located. in an outlet mall 45 minutes from your.
house. And have a daughter that doesn't. absolutely. hate you. And you got a few nice friends at the. Lowe's. You got a few nice friends. And you you don't see each other that. much out of work. You did one time, but. it was kind of weird. You got a few of the guys together and. you went to a restaurant called Yard. House. Google it. I'm not doing that. whole thing again. But you went to Yard House and you got. chicken nachos, and it was fun enough.
It was fun enough. And you kind of see a woman who you. think might be seeing someone else. She said she'll never live with anyone. else again and never get remarried. She. put the boundaries up immediately, which. you thought was a little harsh up front, but you kind of like it now. She's a little cold and stares off. She. smokes a lot and says she has no plans. on stopping. That is the best you're going to do in. this country, on average, for the most. part. You work at a Lowe's and you're. divorced. You date a woman who's a.
smoker and has no plans on stopping, and. she says, "I like waking up alone.". Your daughter doesn't completely hate. you. She pities you, which you think. might be a little worse. But you're not bleeding out in the Gaza. Strip. And that's the promise. that we can make. is if you get it together out there, you. nots,
if you get it together, relax with the. religion, on both sides. Relax with all the weaponry, relax with. the killing. If you're lucky, one day you will be driving alone 45. minutes to work in a Lowe's. Your daughter will call you. She will say, "I'm going away for the. weekend, but I'll call you when I get. back. I really miss you. I love you,
Dad.". You will say, "Thank you, honey.". You will put your phone down. That smoker, that woman you're dating, will also call you. She'll say, "I'm around tonight." That's. as romantic as she gets. And you'll put your phone down. And. you'll think to yourself, "You know. what? It's not that bad." And you'll. never see the teenage driver coming.
You'll never see the teenage driver. coming. You'll smile thinking about your. daughter and the somewhat mediocre sex. you'll have with that [ __ ] later on. You'll never see that teenage driver. coming. You'll hear the smack. And you'll feel the glass. And a few of those shards of glass will. get in your smile. But you went out. nice. You went out good.
And they'll wonder where you are tonight. at Lowe's, but they won't call you. They. won't call you. Your phone won't ring. And you knew they wouldn't call you. As. you lay there dying, you go, "They won't. call. They'll just think it's one of those. nights.". That's. the American win. So, if you get your [ __ ] act together. out there in the desert, you could have. that.
