A Job Is A Job | The Tim Dillon Show #381

ladies and gentlemen welcome to the show. we are late and we apologize for that. because I was coming uh back from the. Levity Live Comedy Club in uh the. Palisades Mall what a. treat and um uh you know it's a it's a. dump it's a fun dump and the audiences. were fun it's uh the area is kind of a. dud and I was coming back and I was on. the FDR and I hit a big pothole.

with my car which is a luxury car and uh. and I was up in Harlem when that. happened so I turned off the uh FDR. Drive onto a street corner in Harlem you. know with this brand new uh Bentley car. which the people in Harlem loved to be. honest they were very complimentary. about it everyone that was walking by. was like we love the car what kind of. car is this this is very nice um and uh.

there were cops parked there who. promptly left when I got there they were. like H let's see what happens which I. would have done too if I was a cop I. would have S it's I would have said it's. not going to be any fun if we sit here. on the corner let's take a loop and then. see um and you we couldn't get a tow. truck till 4:00 a.m. and it was just me. and my opener and we were sitting in the. Bentley and it was on we're on 145th. Street.

uh 142nd and Fifth Avenue and um we were. sitting there in the Bentley uh and we. were stand outside of it periodically. from time to time and people would walk. over and talk to us and some people. would look at us and some people would. you know and then the one toe truck guy. we got a pizza at one point and we're. eating the pizza and one uh tow truck. guy came over it was like a Dominican. guy and he's like I can't tow it because. it needs a flatbed and I was like yeah. that makes sense you know and he's like. you got to watch out for these.

Venezuelans I'm like what and he goes. yeah the Venezuelan migrants they're. they're robbing everybody they're just. taking purses and he goes there's one. guy he goes he's on a walkie-talkie he. tells him he goes go get me a phone go. get me a I'm like wait what what's. happened so you know again that's not me. I didn't say that I you know that's a. guy who's coming up to me a Dominican. guy in uh at at 1:00 a in Harlem going. you got to watch out for the Venezuelans. and uh which which just made me laugh um.

I was like where is that guy on the news. but you know you never see like where is. he where is his Rea you know you never. see like the Dominican tow truck driver. uh reaction to what's going on but he he. went on and on he was going on and on. about Venezuelan migrants gangs and you. know I I was like oh well we'll you know. we'll do our best we will do our best to.

avoid uh but you know we were sitting. ducks if if anybody wanted the car they. would have taken it nobody did we we. ended up getting it out of there um but. that's why we're late so it's not and we. weren't in maybe that's important we. weren't in the center of things we're. kind of off to the side um but you know. it's not that bad Fox News it's not that. bad a new Bentley sat on the. corner on 142nd and F it looked like a.

sting I think if you wanted to steal a. car it looked like a sting it was like. me and a Souther white kid standing. outside of the car like two undercover. cops with just Bentley there eating. pizza waiting to get jacked so I think. it was one of those things where like. people were like wait a minute you know. I was like this is a little too this is. a little too on the nose maybe but the. cops kept you know like they would they. would be like you know every like hour. they'd be like oh you're still here I'm. like like what does that mean uh I'm.

like this this is in such a bad area. they were like no it's not it's not good. but nothing. happened but what did happen was we did. not get home until uh 5:00 a.m. and. everybody I was exhausted and so I slept. till like 1 and uh now of course I'll. lose the car for a month the thing about. having these luxury cars which is stupid. I've kind of learned my lesson about. them I think maybe the next things I get. when this is a lease when I turn it back. in I think I'll just not do this again.

because anything that goes wrong with. any of these cars is like the minimum a. month and you have to turn it in and you. know it's annoying now not obviously. it's not as annoying as other things. that people go through right this is not. you know I'm not you know people are. going to be like what about Gaza you. know I you know I know I'm aware that. seems worse but uh it is annoying that. you can't take this to a. regular they they don't have a spare. tire in the bent there's none there's no. spare tire you're just out there like.

and then you got to go through their. people you can't use Triple A you got to. go through their whole thing and you. know it's a very uh annoying process but. the what is happening in Gaza is worse I. is that okay is that okay to say that. the starvation the mass starvation now. and the you know and of course being in. a tunnel the people that have been in. that tunnel for a long time the hostages. have been in that tunnel now for how. long have they been in that tunnel. probably about two months since October.

three months four months almost four. yeah four months in the Hamas tunnel and. a lot of them have died now it's uh it's. never going to work over there I mean. this is just my surmise from the whole. thing it's just not going to work and. you know we're not going to talk about. it because you know it's just not going. to work you know eventually you just you. know you have to accept that it isn't. going to work you know I remember my I. had an uncle and an aunt and they you. know it just didn't seem good they would. show up they would show up to the you. know the holiday parties at different. different times she would come later and.

bring dessert she would kind of not come. for the dinner and he would come for the. dinner and she would kind of show up. with like chocolate covered strawberries. you know three hours later and we were. like oh something's. up and something was up because they are. now divorced and they both live happy. lives. separately from each other but this is. what I think is uh happening over there. now obviously there was in my uncle and. aunt's case there was certainly less.

violence there is more violence over in. the Middle East from my perspective with. my uncle and my aunt my uncle and Aunt. they made they like made a lot of faces. it was a lot of like scowls and kind of. you know and that was that's not nothing. but it certainly wasn't kind of the you. know the bombing of the hospitals and. everybody dying that's a little bit more. that's a little more depressing um you. know but uh our president now I think.

the they're getting into the they're. getting into the final stages of. grief and they got to get rid of this. man they cannot run him they are going. to lose if they run him this is the. Scuttle but I talk to a lot of people. that certainly know more than I do and. they're all basically saying that this. is not going to work they cannot run a. guy uh who is essentially in a stage of. mental declin we all know that it's it's.

quite obvious to everyone uh Trump also. confuses things and make Mis makes. missteps but in in nowhere. near uh the level that Biden has. publicly and um finally the spe uh the. special Council just released a report. that they're not really indicting Biden. for these documents that he had because. he doesn't know where he is they were. basically like he's you know this is a.

kindly old fellow who doesn't know where. he is or what he's doing he has a poor. memory there was a quote um that. basically said that that you know. alleviates his responsibility it would. have been better if he was indicted. because people would have went oh okay. you know the old dog can still fight you. know at least he can still lie to us I. mean that's all we really want our. politicians to be able to do is to be. able to lie that's the that's the job. requirement that's the whole description.

of a a political figure primarily is. that they have the mental capacity to. lie to you know to make things up to to. manipulate uh that's what a politician. does and he's too old to do that he's. too confused to do that he's too. forgetful he doesn't really know what. happened uh you know and um you know the. the money quote I think was it yeah he's. an elderly man with a poor memory you.

know the jury would be sensitive to an. elderly man with a poor memory the. president did not remember when he was. vice. president even within several years when. his son Bo died the memory appeared hazy. when describing the Afghanistan debate. that was once so important to. him so I mean this is the biggest uh you. know non-story because we know all of. this but you know now the people are. being forced to confront this and now.

there's not that many people I mean you. have Michelle Obama who you know half. the country is convinced as a man um you. know I don't know if that you know hurts. her I imagine that it it could help in. certain areas and certain areas it you. know might be a problem but she's kind. of it Gavin Newsome is a hated uh. charlatan who lives on a Vineyard and. manages a failed state from a Vineyard. that is trying to be I mean the the.

plagues biblical plagues are descending. upon California at a rate uh that only. suggests that there is a God and that he. is not impartial to the coasts he. clearly prefers the East Coast which of. course he would if there is a God. there's no way he likes the West Coast. better you know there's no way that. would imagine he's like the most. superficial being and he just cares that. it's pretty you know um no I'm sure he's. you know he's interested in you know the.

Flora and the fauna but he also likes. the the the life the people that he's. created and there's no way that he's not. disappointed in the west coast there's. just no way and um Gavin Newsome is a. you know uh hated figure he's not liked. he's he's you know he's smarmy there's. all the things about him he's a. good-look kind of 50-year-old boy. that nobody trusts and no one should and. he's presiding over a state and when he.

had the chance to really wipe the floor. with Ronda santis in the debate he. didn't he didn't he kind of choked you. know and D santis is not like a great. debater he's like a cop D santis is like. a cop best case he's like a principal. he's like a substitute math teacher who. takes himself way too serious we had a. guy like that had a substitute math. teacher that like was really proud of. his that he was a teacher and he was a. coach and you know he wasn't a full time. teacher and he like you know was like.

doing extra around the school to try to. get hired full-time and he'd like call. you out if you were wearing a hat in the. Hall that's kind of the vibe so you know. you could easily kind of trounce Ronda. sandes but Gavin Nome didn't do it so I. don't think he's the move and then. you're looking at the rest of the field. and nobody nobody has name recognition. that's the biggest problem the biggest. thing with the political system in. America is you need name recognition and.

Michelle Obama has name recognition she. can come in and if she comes. in I'm telling you it's the only shot. they. have it's the only shot they have is if. Michelle Obama comes in and they do the. whole kind of because it is powerful. right the idea of like black female. president you know you know identity. politics is annoying and ultimately.

probably destructive well we know it's. destructive but it does have a certain. visceral appeal and it always has a. certain visceral appeal even I catch. myself I I'm not a human being when I. watch people and they're very emotional. about you know the fact that they are. taking steps that nobody in. their race has ever done before even. though that's not true like a lot of. these people are like no one has ever. done that and it's like no people have. like. they erase they erase a lot of people.

right it's like Martin was my favorite. show Growing Up is a great black sitcom. right I mean The Cosby Show Living. Single In Living Color there were there. were a lot of you know but sometimes. people get up on stage you're like I no. one has been here before me and I want. to thank everyone who tried and failed. and it's like it's an odd you're like. wait what I want to thank everyone who.

tried to get here and failed because. this country was always a racist but. they couldn't deny me of course my. talent couldn't be denied the others of. you know they tried but they lacked. something but I had it and now but when. you look at a lot of these people the. gay people that get up and do it and. they're like I'm the first queer person. to ever and it's never True by the way. all of these things are never true and. people people get away with it but.

they're never true you can always find. if and you don't have to look that hard. to find people like Ray always brings up. that like one of the composers for the. music of the Stanley kubic movies was. like a transwoman who you know is this. legendary composer all this music that. went in the kubric films you don't have. to look that hard to find. somebody before you that also did a. thing there was a gay comedian I don't. know his name and I'm not going to find. it out but there was a gay comedian who.

performed for the military all the time. and it was very difficult and if. somebody knows who this is they can. message me um his name and he died but. he was a gay comedian that would perform. often for the military which is not. obviously always going to be the easiest. crowd for an openly gay comedian and he. died and but he did it and he went out. and he said and he would win them over. with material and then in the middle of.

the set or towards the end or whatever. he would he would come out of the closet. and and people wouldn't mind it was you. know it was just but it was you know a. little awkward because you're performing. and you know when he was performing. attitudes about gay people were more uh. you know conservative than they are now. but you know he wasn't famous this was. not a famous person but he was out there. as an openly gay comedian doing. what he did so I've been lucky enough to.

get to a level and I've probably even. said there's probably not too many gay. male comedians who've gotten to a level. that I've gotten there's a few of them. and I've been lucky and that's the. internet primarily because the internet. is you know allowed people to get. involved in people's careers. but the the reality is you can never. claim to be you're not the first of. anything in. 2024 you're not it you might be doing a. great job but you're probably not the.

first that you you you just maybe got. more famous than the other people which. is such an empty way to look at it. doesn't mean you're better or you're. more. deserving it it just means that things. worked out for you but there's a lot of. people that so it's always interesting. when these speeches go a little. overboard they just they they they run. that line between narcissism and you.

know because we get it it is good to you. know to make to break new ground but. then it just gets a l it always gets a. little uncomfortable towards the. end it's a little uncomfortable towards. the end of the speech when the person's. like it's it's stand on the shoulders of. giants to be here tonight is the only. person you know of my group to be here. the only the first.

non-binary Pacific. Islander to be here with you tonight and. I I look at those other people that that. were. disgraced their lives were horrible and. they were spit on they their whole lives. they just opened their mouths and people. in their mouths and when I got out. of that limousine and I walked on that. red carpet and my dress and I got taken. all these people were taking photos of.

me it was never lost on me how horrible. all those other people's lives were and. how great it is for me even though. there's a lot more to do and this is no. indication that it's over because it's. not over it's actually in many ways. worse for me than those people somehow. even though I'm winning this I don't. want to I'm not handing I'm not handing. you over the thing I'm telling you it's. still bad and it's going to be bad but. just as I was in my Valentino dress I. got out and I just I thought about all.

those people whose lives were terrible. right before me but there is a visceral. exciting thing about identity is. something fun about it we all can get. into it we go yeah good for you I'm. happy I'm happy when someone wins right. so I think Michelle Obama is the only. way and it's got to be big it has to be. big it's got to be Beyonce at the. convention it has to be big you've got.

to it's got to be that you have to lean. you have to lean into it in a way that's. you know you got to ride the line. between offensive I mean it's got to be. Native America with the drums kind of. drum circles and it's got to be a. African like traditional African dance. because that is a nice dance you don't. see that a lot like the traditional kind. of African dance they do and I'm telling. you this all seems racist none of it is. and that's what's interesting what's. interesting in about it is that it all. seems right and genuinely genuinely none.

of it is and then I have to correct. people all the time because I'm telling. her how to win telling her how to win. and in order to win you have I want to. see Minnesota delegates white I mean. gaunt white ghost people that emerged. from their snowy towns in the. Northeast and they come in the Great. Lakes the Finger Lakes Region they come. out they come out and they are just kind.

of moving awkwardly at the convention to. some great African drum beats great. African drum beat and you just see like. the awkward swaying the awkward swaying. of a librarian from Minnesota you know. she's just awkwardly swaying and she's. got to bring the they got to bring the. Jews and the Muslims together and we can. only really do that at this point. through kind of a kind of a beat kind of. a dance kind of a musical because it is. is going to be very awkward right.

because I mean you got to have to what. do they do that's the biggest issue for. the Democrat do they even bring it up do. they even bring it up at the convention. they're gonna maybe have to but I'm. telling you right now it's got to be. spectacle they have to lean on. spectacle they don't have the Jew Muslim. thing is g to be tough because it you. know I. mean they've got people of color that's. their one of their big you know demos. and then they have Jewish people that's. another big demo okay and then they're.

going to have to get up and they're. going to. go oh boy how do we handle this and the. only way to handle it the only way to. skate past it is spectacle the only way. to skate past the Border stuff is. spectacle the strength of this country. is you know they really just have to. double down on spectacle and the only. way to do that is kind of with Michelle. Obama coming out with Barack. star power star studded you bring.

everybody out I mean everybody is on. that stage DOA cat everyone and you are. just and no one because that's the. that's the only thing they're going to. be able to they're not going to be able. to like. logically there's too many. contradictions in in their platform. there's too many groups in the room that. hate each other too many people hate. each other and when too many people hate. each other. you you have to lean on.

spectacle everybody it's kind of got to. be a concert it has to be a coronation. it can't be like you're going through. the. platform no no no no no no no Not Gon to. work you cannot do a line by line like. let's decide the party but that's got to. be done behind closed doors in secret. and silence silence Tracy chap REM look. at Tracy Chapman has to do fast car. there can be no discussion of anything.

you bring out Tracy. Chapman you got a fast car it doesn't. matter that the Michelle Obama was. raised Rich pretty much not rich but. middle class fine she's fine you know PE. you know Michelle Obama can just just. talk about she should just do the lyrics. to Fast Car you know you know uh you. know if she got up there get the lyrics. to fast she got up there and and and.

just. poetically she was like you've got a. fast car and everyone's clapping and I. want a ticket to anywhere yeah maybe we. can make a deal maybe together we can. get somewhere yeah starting from zero we. got nothing to lose been working at the. convenience store there's a lot of. people out here that manage to save just. a little bit of money clap everyone's. going up nut and we won't have to drive. too far just across the border and into.

the City and then someone's going to. yell free Palestine and that you know. you just have to keep going you know and. you have to ignore it you have to. because you know that's going to happen. at the conent they're gonna they're. already planning they're already. planning that disruption so they're G to. go free Palestine and then if she's good. and she's good she'll just point at them. you and I can both get jobs finally see. what it means to be living and. everyone's clapping and then she gets.

serious cuz my old man's got a problem. he's got a problem he live in the bottle. that's the way it is he said his body is. too old for working and everyone's. nodding you know the nodding like cuz. you know she's a wise black woman is. what it is that's what it is I whenever. black woman talks I listen because they. know more than like a 17-year-old white. piece of so I always listen they've. been through more as people than like. young white I never if you're not hot on. Instagram you're like a young white dude. I if you're hot I just watch it on mute.

I don't care at all what you're saying. if you're 20- old white dude and you're. like that's all I hear but if a black. woman no matter what stage of her life. she she's homeless I listen a homeless. black woman you know who's like I will. turn and listen to her a minute because. I just have more respect for their their. base of w they've been through more. so people in the audience are going. to be. in wrapped you know there's going to be.

like they they're G is that a word in. wrapped and raptured in in in what am I. looking for it doesn't matter the point. is what am I say you know what I mean. they're they're gonna be and and. and and and then Michelle's going to be. at the convention and she's going to be. like his body's too young to look like. this and everyone's going to start nding. now here's the deal there are maybe. certain people in the convention will. know it's the lyrics to fastar by Tracy. CH but it won't matter. she'll go so Mama went off and left him.

she wanted more from life than he could. give and I said somebody's got to take. care of and then every and it's a big. Applause line so I quit school and. that's what I. did I'm telling you you have to lean on. spectacle at that convention Biden has. to be taken out like Old Yeller they you. know cuz Biden's a a racist criminal he. an old racist criminal like many of our. politic Biden is a r he called the.

cities jungles he's a he's got Shady. deals in the Ukraine he's got a cracks. smoking son who's hookers with. guns to their head you know Biden has. had it you know I mean his his. like biography I mean it's just. a you know by Biden is the senator from. uh Delaware which is the shadiest state.

it's where every credit card company. moves to in America just so they can. over financially illiterate people. by calling them on the phone and saying. we're sending credit cards to your house. and they have these. exorbitant activation fees and crazy. interest and the monthly are. insane and they moved to Delaware. because there's very little regulation. and they can over everyone Joe.

Biden's the senator from that state that. state. okay he's a shady guy and he's been one. he's been a lifelong politician he's. stayed in there forever okay Al Franken. got bounced because he did like a fake. little he's like oh look at me I'm. pretending to Gro tits he's out Biden. has been around forever ever it gives. you an idea of what he's into or who.

he's in with that he's been there. forever he's a shady guy he just a shady. guy there's no way around that he's an. old racist. criminal that they H they have to put. him out to pasture nicely like Old. Yeller and there's something beautiful. about putting him out to pasture and. then having Michelle Obama come in in a. real real El electric way that leans.

heavily on symbolism imagery spectacle. fun and that would be the democrat's. only shot make it a part throw a party. you have to throw a party right now for. the next six months to get someone El it. has to be because Donald Trump is. throwing a party he's throwing a party. you may not like the party you may think.

the party is not is not good for the. country you may think the people at the. party have had too much to drink you may. think some of them aren't mentally well. you might think some of them are violent. you might look around the party and go. some of these people this seems like a. real powder gag and it might be but it's. a party it is a party there's helicopter. rides there's festivals there's comedy. acts he's out there on the stump. roasting people making you laugh he's.

throwing a party for his PE that's all. we have left in this country right now. by the way don't kid yourself is the. part people just want to go to the party. we know we're kind of at the end not to. belabor a point not to keep going back. to the same theme but we know that we're. entering a period of turmoil okay in in. in many different ways uh you know. California houses are just falling off. the hill into the street. it's it's a period of.

intense difficulty China Russia all. North Korea all of these countries are. enemies of us we have problems. everywhere you look some of it's. unavoidable some of it can maybe be. fixed but we know all of the things. coming coming down the pike AI. automation climate it's not not going to. be easy it won't be easy we know we just.

want to go to a. party you have to throw a. party the Biden. candidacy is not a party the only person. in the Biden group that's is Hunter and. he's partied too much it's like we all. have that friend where it's like this is. too. much hey this is too much like that's. not a fun party Hunters overdid it he.

overdid it and the Biden candidacy isn't. Fun here's what the Biden candidacy is. Trump's party is a party maybe in a big. desert mansion in Arizona can we say. that and everybody's out in the backyard. everybody's getting up it's crazy. it's a turquoise colored pool the desert. lights are out everybody is just really. up the party is the point the.

party is the point. right Biden's party is like you go to. this Rich kid's house and he keeps. telling you about all the things that. are going to happen at the party and. none of it really happens and you're. like is this guy confused is this guy. lying to us is this guy is this even. real and it never gets off the ground it. never it just kind of it just kind of. sits there and it's kind of a dud but.

the Trump party the party is the point. everything he's all the experiences. you're gonna have you're having you're. having that's kind of the fun of the. Trump candidacy yes he promises things. that may or may not happen but that's. they're never the point they're never. the actual point you know Biden's it's. the point he's like oh we're gonna these. girls said you know the Central High. School well the girls said they're. coming in uh give me your phone let's.

text what was her name Tracy Tina who is. that oh she was a hottie and she's. coming and she said she was com like. it's at the party you get to the Trump. party and he's like isn't this the best. party in the way and everybody's. clapping you're like well I guess it is. this seems like the best party in the. way everybody's up and yes at the. Trump party a few people die few people. die probably a few people die and then. you know he eulogizes the. he goes they died they were at the party. and everyone goes yeah they were at the.

party who cares they the part you know. the Biden party safe you know Biden's. telling you not to get too close to the. cliff Trump's like get the get the. picture get the picture get that. Instagram photo who cares so Michelle. Obama has and the Democratic party has. in their in their ability their ability. right now to throw a.

rager but it's got to be. big it's got to be big it's got to be. 90s liberalism that was fun when all the. white people wanted to be black even. though that was gross then because we. all know that that was in the middle of. mass incarceration but you know what I. mean what I mean by that is that it's. got to be fun it's got to feel fun if. you want to win I'm telling you how to. win and I know people listen to this. show that have some influence you have. to throw some type of event I I this.

campaign has to feel new and electric. and exciting it's got to feel like a. party and if it doesn't it's never going. to work so take my advice at that. convention I'm talking about African. dance or maybe it's an 80s themed 80s. 90s break dance with the big boom boxes. I don't again you're like oh my God this. is R it isn't I'm just wondering what. theme are we gonna go with here what.

theme is it gen X90 slacker are we doing. that is it friends is it like a Friends. theme like is that the theme where it's. like we're all looking out for each. other we're all friends here Michelle's. our friend and we're all friends and. does she walk out with Aniston and kudro. and all the I'm not kidding and and do. we do we all put do we like. pour out hot tub water for Matthew Perry. and do we all put our fingers to the sky.

you know you know I don't know what we. do I don't know if we do that I don't. know if that's wise to have a friends. convention where we memorialize Matthew. Perry that that's that's out there sure. that might not be one that they take. from this episode but I I will say I'm. do you have and I'm like do we reunite. the cast of Martin do we reunite with. tiesa Campbell kind of what the Emmys. did. DM has got a little a couple more. viewers than they usually do do we get.

tashaa Arnold Tisha Campbell Martin Cole. Anthony Payne this was one of the. greatest comedy shows do we do. that does Britney Griner come out and do. start just start threep point I don't. know I don't know I don't know I'm. saying Trump is gonna have his version. of that he's going to be doing the white. Olympics opening ceremony you have to. give give. liberals get they got to feel cool again.

people got to start looking at them. going this is. cool this isn't just like green-haired. people that are angry in. Wisconsin this feels cool guaranteed. download the DraftKings pick six app now. and sign up with code Tim Dylan first of. all pick six is the newest way for you. to get on in on the fantasy football. action with DraftKings just between two. just pick between two and six NFL. players and choose if they're going to. have more or less of a stat for example.

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people are choosing polyamory over. monogamy but it's not all Rosie. participants say. yeah this is one of these articles where. it's like quite obvious to everyone what. it's going to say where it's like. uh you know at first the whole poly. concept sounded. flaky married happily for 26 years to go. she met when she was 19 Sharice always. had this.

what what is this word are you. serious is that a real word I believe it. is but it's uh I wouldn't say it yet are. you crazy we can have the computer say. it the word in it what what publication. is that uh the National Post the. National Post. can I spell this word Sharice always had.

this n g g l i n. [Music]. g Sharice always had this l i n g. thing. what it's a word this is the. craziest there was no other word this. made it through an editor all right so. I'm going to say it if it's a word. Sharice always had this Ling thing a. curiosity about women that she never had. the opportunity to.

explore who cares why chicks you know I. mean listen some people are by I'm not. saying it's just White Chicks. but I don't you know. folks I'm stuck on this word now this is. crazy that they let this word even. get here's the deal. polyamory doesn't work here's why people. get. jealous jealousy is.

real right so we all know what polyamory. is it's we're all going to. everybody and everyone's going to be. cool about it you're G to have sex with. people I'll have sex with. people maybe we'll be in a thruple which. seems absurd people are in a thruple. they're in a relationship with two other. people I mean it's. crazy we're going to have romantic. comedies now with quads with four people. we have groups of folks we've tried this.

it's called Cults it's called Cults I. mean truly a bunch of people living. together and or you know not. even living together it's called a cult. it doesn't really work everyone has to. drink poison at the end or they make a. documentary about you on YouTube but. that's really what it comes down. to you mean these are like the idea that. this is going to work is. crazy. people the idea of it sounds good but.

the happiest people I know are are are. are they're building something with. their wife or husband or or partner. significant other whatever like when you. are building. something you C you have. to like. subordinate all of the desires you have. for the greater good and the greater. good as you're building something with a. person you know and you you can't.

gratify every base need that you're. having all the time this isn't this. isn't a productive way to live and the. reason. that the media has fallen in love with. polyamory is that a lot of people in the. media are losers and losers this is an. attractive philosophy to losers and a. lot of people that are in the media are. losers the people that are writing these.

articles that are like cocooned in their. Apartments all day you know eating. Chinese food eating bow buns and writing. about how you should proed with your. love life are losers and they're. incapable of being in any type of. productive relationship they're. incapable of finding a partner that they. enjoy and that they want to build. something with so they they tell you. that no one should have these things. because with the media they tell you.

that they don't have any money no one. should have any money no one can make. any money they tell you that they can't. find a PO well then no one should. everyone they say they say if they can't. be attractive no one should be. attractive it's the ideal that's the. problem the ideal is the problem if they. don't have a six-pack no one can have a. six-pack you know and that's that's what. the media often does they often go well. this is our experience we're miserable. we live in New York we don't have any. money we live in these tiny little.

apartments you don't need that suburbs. suck you don't need that backyard you. don't need all that land you should be. like me miserable in Brooklyn I'm. 46 and I'm miserable I'm single I've you. know I I I live in a in a in a Emer in. as section of Brooklyn that's coming up. I'm. 46 the time to do that when you're 19. you know but that's why that's why this.

stuff is all catching for there's no. there's no this polyamory stuff by it's. this whole B feels like engineered I. don't know anyone well I don't know. anybody who's poly Hammer I know I know. people that are not um it's my godson. should we. answer should we answer my godson should. he be on the Pod sure it'd be kind of. interesting to have him on the. podcast my godson was watching the. Tucker interview with Putin and clapping. I don't know what it means I don't know.

what it. means. but I watched that whole interview I'll. tell you what I think about that it's. very hard to me because pu I've you know. I've known him for a very long time and. we have a lot of social or Social Circle. is he hi Roland say hello on the. podcast he said he said he wanted to go. to. Timmy you want to go to my house Roland. you you can take him to the. pool he can go to the pool if you want. take him to the pool China China play.

him the interview with Vladimir. Putin Tucker Carson just did an. interview with Vladimir Putin it's very. important for him to watch because that. is his. ally Putin is your. ally hi Putin is your. ally to he's so happy you could take him. to the pool and then play play Putin. all right well I'm in the middle I do.

have to finish this podcast but goodbye. Roland. Putin um it's it's interesting because. Putin called me you know and we don't. talk as much as we used to and it is fun. when he calls and he call and he has. here's the thing about him he has a. subtle a very subtle sense of humor and. I appreciate that because I'm more. gregarious and L and that's why it. always worked in as a friendship because. friendships need to kind of have those. opposite components and his his clan is.

from St Petersburg and I know more. people in moska but we do have certainly. there's an. overlap and he called me and said I'm. gonna have Tucker on and I said I said. go I said you know what I said do a. whole thing I said give him a. dissertation and he goes no I go do it. and he did it. um that's for the people that think that. I really know Putin that there are. people that watch your show that think. that Russia pays me because I've. questioned the um uh I've questioned our.

uh our our policy our dedicated policy. of nuclear. war the American defense establishment's. dedicated policy of more nuclear war um. I watched the interview favorite part. was when uh Putin was like hey he said. the Tucker he goes hey uh thank God you. didn't get into the CIA because Putin. doesn't respect anyone who doesn't have. real power and what's cool about that. moment is Putin actually respects like.

the CIA because he said you know they. were always our enemies but he goes a. job's a job and he kind of. smiles you know because if all you fight. against. is the CIA you kind of have a respect. for them Putin you know his entire life. he's been fighting against this one. group of people right and the way he. said that t talker he's got you know. Putin doesn't care about people in the. media he doesn't I don't think he really. respects the.

media he this is not you know so the. when he said that he's like oh thank God. you didn't get into the CIA he was. basically like I would have respected. you if you were here to poison me. because that's the type of guy he is and. that's the thing here's why. Putin is even though he is uh murders. people here's what's interesting about. Putin he's not on Tik. Tock this is what we like about but he's.

a relic of another. age let's say that about him he's an. armchair philosopher he's. Grandpa if you know uh grandpa had. hundreds of nuclear weapons he's he's a. relic he's not really. interested uh. in the New Media land ESC Cape we can. say that that's not he's not interested. in that what Putin uh Putin orients.

himself from his position he he's the. first answer was 30 minutes he goes this. is why I believe what I. believe is it junk was he filibustering. is it whatever it none of that matters. because it this is the the guy this is. his perspective you don't live in Russia. so the reality of the situation is I my. interest is that America doesn't go to. war with Russia in a in a capacity with. nuclear weapons um and my interest is.

that America doesn't. instigate a a wider war in that part of. the world that that becomes a war that. we're fighting this is my instinct this. is not uh veneration of his worldview. per se although there's certain things. he says which I I completely get it and. there's certain things he says where I. go okay I I was a debate guy I know kind. of what he's doing but that moment was. my favor when he kind of he kind of has. that a shocks moment because the fun of. his life is over by the way the fun of.

his like he he's at the top of the. mountain it's very lonely he's got the. big. desk but I'm not comparing myself to. Putin I wish that if I was on OIC and it. really worked perhaps but no what. basically the the thing about Putin is. at this point he's only living for. Russia or what he thinks Russia is like. he you know his friends are all older. they're all dying the excitement of his.

life being a spy climbing the ranks. the women killing the people. your life almost being taken all the. time that's kind of over that's. over it it's now become now he's of. course trying to outrun these. coups that's why the progan thing he. probably felt alive again for the first. time he's like oh I got to kind of take. this plane at a mosc he probably felt. alive he said this feels like the old I.

guarantee you at some point to one of. his friends he said something like B. feels like the old days feels like the. old day because he's had absolute power. over there for a while and he's gets. boring and that's why people are like. the oh this interview is boring that's. what everyone said it's boring I don't. like it it's not fun that was the. critique of the interview it's boring. it's not fun it's not interesting it's.

boring where's the back and forth. where's the. yelling I want them to yell at each. other yeah it's a little dry it's a. little dry but it that's what it. is what do you think Putin like all. these. people this is what's interesting about. the qanon cult the qanon people. again not all wrong we know. that but.

they're they're. wildly speculative about most things and. they're just downright insane about. others that there are body doubles. people have died but they've been. replaced JFK Jr is coming back but by. the way you want to talk about if JFK Jr. is alive and he comes back and he runs. with Michelle Obama it's over. it will be over but I what I mean by the. qanon cult is.

that politics by its very nature is. boring I think the hardest thing for us. in our society to wrap our heads. around is that there is a. banality to the evil that we see in the. world it is not nearly as exciting as we. we think it's ancient blood Cults and. shape-shifting lizards and all the. things but what it really is is the cold. marble floors of a bank in like Geneva.

it's the high heels of a woman walking. across the cold marble floors of a bank. in. Geneva it's a very short phone call on a. line that people assure uh each other. isn't being. tapped it's a lunch where people are. very vague about their intentions but. there's an underlying discomfort. there is a banality to it that's where. obviously the phrase the banality of.

evil it's what you know and we just. aren't built like that so much of. American culture has been imagined by. Hollywood in in uh spurts of of two. hours and hours on TV or half hours even. storylines that have beginning middle. and end and they they are filled with. Intrigue and it's not to say that there. is an Intrigue in the world it's not to. say that things aren't interesting but. that's really what it is it's.

not it's not these it's this guy's. talking about Zars he's talking. about Vladimir being the the this guy. being baptized and this is like the. greatest one of the other Great Moments. is Tucker is like where are we now and. Putin's like 1500s he's like. 15 you know you will fall. asleep that is most of the. things what where people are being.

killed if you were to get a full. accounting of them you would go to sleep. this is not an episode of a show you. like this is not White Lotus we're at. the end of Eight Episodes we're like who. kills who White Lotus you know the. body's there it's an episode one so you. know it's all heading somewhere in. episode 8 but if I were to sit down and. not that I do but if a scholar were to. explain to you the Israel Palestine. conflict or Russia Ukraine you would you.

be You' be in bed you'd be in bed you're. Geor killing each other wait. what Prince. Phillip Vladimir being baptized the kixs. or whatever it's it's. boring and then I think people just have. this idea and you could see there were. certain moments in the Putin interview. because my interest is in Poli itics. it's always the human angle there was. just certain moments and that was really. one of them where Putin's like a job's a.

job and the way he said that you know he. was basically saying that that was the. fun of my life that was the excitement. of my life the funest part of when. you're a comedian a lot of times is when. you're running around open mics not. knowing what will happen and you have. all these people and you're all on the. same level and you're all running around. eating slices of pizza and you're all. broke and you're all trying to figure. out how to be a ComEd. not to say that you don't find fun. throughout your career you do but it.

changes there's more pressure there are. expectations sacrifices are greater. they're more real in the very beginning. you sacrific almost nothing you're you. know the expectations are very low. you're having a lot of fun I think in. Putin's world when he was a spy and he. he didn't know that the future of Russia. is resting on his shoulders and his mind. he had a lot more fun was a lot more. fun and you could you could see that. when he goes they were always our. enemies but a job is a job he's like. they we li without them what are we what.

are we what are we he has a respect for. the enemy he does not respect media he. does not respect interview he does not. care he in the beginning he goes are we. having a show we're gonna have a talk. because if we're gonna have a talk I'm G. to talk for 30 minutes you're going to. be bored some of your viewers will tune. out I don't care I don't respect you and. I don't respect them because I'm one of. the very few people on the planet that. has a nuclear Arsenal I respect those.

people just like when he said I don't. speak to Biden but our our agencies talk. we have. communication I they say to me that. nuclear test is not about you I say the. same thing to them our agencies talk. they. talk so. seeing the the kind of light his eyes. lit up only a few times but during the. interview when he said yeah yeah they. were always our enemies but a job's a. job you could tell and I. felt dare I say oh no they're coming for.

me now if I say. it dare I say I felt a little sorry for. him because he's locked away in that. Palace he's locked away in the palace. and he's basically got in his mind the. history of the Russian state. on his. shoulders you know and it's not that.

much fun probably he's not having that. much. fun and then for that second he. remembered you know back when it was fun. me and the guys people are trying to. kill us we're trying to kill them we're. trying to turn assets they're trying to. turn us it's a deadly game but it's. their. game you know it's their game and he. goes yeah job's a job he respects that. there was something interesting to me. about that I I'm familiar with his. rationale for the Ukraine war I didn't. need to know that I'm familiar with that. I'm familiar with most of it his history.

lesson in the beginning obviously became. a little bit of a surprise I don't know. all of that but I kind of know exactly. why he's the his world view I'm aware of. it but the human moments that that. dripped out where he goes yeah it was a. fun we had fun you know a job's a job. they were always our enemy we were. always going against them can you find. that part yeah yeah one yeah let's find. this everybody loves blue you take it. and your penis gets hard it's a it's a. thing you can take so you're ready for.

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advertisement now here it is and I want. you to watch Vladimir Putin's eyes here. because they come alive like a kid on. Christmas. morning committed a coup in. Kiev what is that supposed to mean who. do you think you are I wanted to ask the. then us. leadership with the backing of. with the backing of CIA of course the.

organization you wanted to join back in. the day as I. understand we should thank God they. didn't let you in although it is a. serious organization I understand my. former viav in the sense that I served. in the first main directorate soet. Union's intelligence. service they have always been our. opponents a job is a job. yeah loves it he goes but that is a. serious organization like what you're.

doing interviewing me this ain't it we. don't respect none of. this let's hear it for everyone in the. shadows folks FSB the CIA the stazzy. everyone all of the people in the. shadows murdering torturing killing I. know it's a controversial thing to say. everybody the IDE of Hamas everyone in. the shadows in the tunnels in the. dark I get my you know I get people see. me they go I'm a fan and that feels so. nice and these guys never hear they. never hear they never hear that they.

never hear that these intelligence. agencies they they never hear that. anyone's a fan of them they have to kill. maim torture in in the shadows forever. it's not easy they have this little you. know group of people they have this. little fraternity of people that respect. each other a job is a job Vladimir Putin. say it's a little fraternity of people. let's hear it for all of them let's hear. it for I don't care if they killed you. or your family listen let's just hear a. job is a. job that is what we have to remember and.

that's what we have to tell Michelle. Obama maybe Tempest bledo comes out I. don't know but it's a it's a spectacle. there's drums steel drums is it an. island field is it a Jamaican field I. don't know it's got to be cool again I. want to see white people from the Great. Lakes region swaying awkwardly to the. music sway awkwardly to the music and. everybody's clapping and Michelle Obama. goes you got a fast car and together we.

can get in that car and and everybody's. clapping and Tracy. Chapman and she's got the guitar out I'm. telling you that's what it is because. the Democrats need to do their job a job. is a job Vladimir Putin just said it he. just said it I don't know if he. even knew how profound that was at the. end but a job is a job and the Democrats. have to do their job they're not doing. their job they're running a guy that's. old and decrepit and he's not fun and.

it's not a party and you're running him. against a guy that maybe throws the best. party in politics it's not going to. work if you if they're going to throw a. party in the back of a house in Arizona. that looks like a Macaroni Grill with a. turquoise pool and a bunch of fent andol. Vapes you better throw a rager. outside of Boston in a big old Victorian. in hangam Massachusetts with a bunch of. polyamorous Lesbos fingering each other.

in the middle of a circle and Tracy. Chapman has to be playing fast. car or you're GNA lose a job is a job.