#195 - Take Me To The Moon | The Tim Dillon Show

when the moon hits your eye like a big. pizza pie it's Andrew Cuomo and you're. listening to this fool like pasta fazool. is Chris Cuomo and the garlic knot tells. you you gotta stay inside and you listen. did you see the video with Chris Cuomo. it's on yet a beat coronavirus by. breathing cuz Chris Cuomo had. coronavirus and he's like a guy called.

me cuz yo Chris gone was a tough guy. ain't gonna let the virus beat me I'm a. [ __ ] garlic knot so Chris Cuomo sees. like a pulmonologist called me and told. me he's like Chris you got that Corona. you gotta do it you gotta got up the. virus wants you in your bed these guys a. tough guy couldn't handle the word. frayed out the virus wants you in your. bed you got to get up and breathe deep. it's literally can we play that yeah. Chris Cuomo giving people advice and at.

a beat coronavirus by doing some weird. chest yoga which may help I don't know. but I mean I mean maybe he's right maybe. the pulmonologist is right I just have a. low opinion of the Cuomo family he's. like you gotta breathe you gotta get the. virus once you are here we go this is it. okay so here's what I've learned here's. the secret to kicking this virus just a. secret potion. it's about your a will he said bye you.

will devotion if the vibration wants us. to lay down the virus water lay down are. you a fan oke other than the Blessed few. the rest of us who get this are gonna. have an experience unlike anything else. they've ever had days and waves the old. notion of getting bed and stay there. when you get sick it sounds great and if. you're really up against it you need to. do as little as possible I love that. this is all written why can't anyone. like I do it all the time why can't you. just talk like why can't he speak like.

he's reading something that's written. clearly right why can't he just sit talk. cuz every speech is just prepared for. him in public right I mean does he even. have corona VII or we are these people. lying that like these celebrities to say. they have it if they really have it some. of these people on their instagrams are. like you know man. it's been very hard for me did you like. this little cloth track like is this.

real did your agent call you and go hey. ah you got it you gotta you gotta come. out that you got co fat 19 there are. agents calling people right now god. here's the best move for you right now. COFF COFF a lot on instagram live. because you need people need to follow. your kovat 19 journey so listen I'm. gonna play some of this because maybe. Chris Cuomo is right okay what you know. Bob Grant who is a phenomenal.

conservative radio huh there's gonna be. a conservative show everybody we did a. we did a communist show last week we're. gonna oscillate we go fascist communist. every other week keep everybody happy. okay I don't know who's gonna win but. what I will whatever boot is on your. neck as to what I support so a Bob grant. whatever you think of his politics. you're racist whatever but a great you. know radio guy old-time radio die you go. get off my phone and people would call. him up they built Bob it's Pony from.

Seaside Heights. it was always Tony from Seaside Heights. a long time list the first time caller. Bob what do you think about and they. they were just some [ __ ] he'd go you. know what Tony he do me a favor. you fake phony fraud that was just. kissed agony god that was his you know. signature line he'd go you fake phony. fraud get off my phone and he kick him. off the phone he used to call the. Cuomo's father Mario Cuomo I think he.

called them son of swatching now I don't. know what that means it's probably bad. but Bob Grant used to be a sign of. swatching all right P Bob Grant Bob. Grant got kicked off WABC radio because. when Ron Brown a Clinton associate was. killed in a plane crash that's a shock. someone near the Clintons killed Bob. Grant said something like the only good. news. coming out of this would be if we find. that Ron Brown his dad and he did die.

and Bob Grant was kicked off he was. kicked off ABC and then he went to wor. and I used to make my grandmother listen. to Bob Grant while she would drive me. like to and from play practice and dance. class so that's how gay Republicans come. to be you go to dance class and you. listen to Bob Grant and Rush Limbaugh on. the way all gay people by the way. secretly Republican that's true all of. them every single one of them I'm dead.

I'm joking about that somebody by the. way you want to talk about rotted brains. someone on instagram accused me this is. great they go in your latest sketch you. say thee of a wife and I'm like the. sketch is me playing a owner of a like a. developer who owns properties and I'm. evicting people and he goes with don't. you think that saying a wife instead of. husband is like a little [ __ ] up and.

I'm like the point of the sketch is that. I'm a demon from hell. real estate developer evicting nurses. from the building and and kicking people. to the street and this is how identity. politics rots people's heads he's like. yeah but you said so I'm like so your. problem is that the demon real estate. developer isn't get you want him to be. gay in the sketch that's on Instagram.

that's what you want let's let's. continue here with Chris Cuomo who does. not have coronavirus I know but you. can't stay there now I'm wise to the. beast and it sways it changes. the fever is just softened by the way he. means by the way he beast his ways he. means Jews that's what he means by that. and then they had to you know what him. and his brother say behind closed doors. you know they're small-minded sauce. monkeys you know they are you know what.

they say when they get a [ __ ] ball of. sauce on the table and they take a. couple of hunks of bread and dip it into. the pot of sauce you know they got a. couple of. words for who owns the media that again. I'm imagining that's what they do I have. no proof of that that's something I'm. imagining Chris and his Neanderthal. brother do cuz they're Neanderthals you. look at Andrew Cuomo's face he's a. Neanderthal he's in the end Rafal andrew.

Cuomo Chris Cuomo is a little you know. whatever can your body hurts so you. don't want to move your body because. what it wants to do is get in your lungs. that's what it wants to do I feel it. constricting my chest when I had that. chest x-ray did I I saw that infiltrate. right away. now I also have something else I haven't. told you I have a low IgM level I would. want the primary I have something else. and it was of a low IQ in fact it was. embarrassing for my family to find out. how low it was I'm basically.

functionally [ __ ] that's why I have. to read a script right now instead of. just talking to you like a normal person. about my experiences with coronavirus I. have to read a prepared statement. because I'm genuinely on the border of. mental retardation and I have a. television show I genuinely have a. television show and cannot process. information like other people so I have. to have a prepared statement about my. sickness bonza antibody I've always had.

a low level okay it's not something. recent it could be genetic it could be. cultural I don't know but it makes me. susceptible to things like bronchitis. and crap like that so there I was on. Friday night okay I was not gonna do the. show tonight I was done I was in a pool. of sweat 12 hours later I was in the. same damn place I hadn't slept a minute. I was just soaked and scared honest to. god so then I get a call from a friend.

of a friend of a friend. now this keeps happening to me now this. new reality of how much people just care. I have this new network of not just. sources but really good people and they. all come this way a friend of a friend. of a friend do you think your brothers. do you think Chris let me ask you a. question let me ask you a question here. do you think some of that network is cuz. your brother's to governor. do you think that's a possibility I. don't know do you think that I'm not. sure do you think it's cuz you have a.

television show some people you said got. this great Network now if people that. truly care about me do you really care. keep going battling this all over the. country in the world and people want to. beat the beast so this doctor calls me. up asked me about my symptoms he's a. pulmonary expert and says can you get up. I say yeah I can get up he says do it he. says can you stretch your torso I said. what do you how great was somebody.

pranking Chris Cuomo like somebody just. getting them to do like how are you yes. this is Daniel Cohen I'm a pulmonary. expert at Langone I'm just calling you. can you get up right now can you stretch. your torso can you do you know the funky. chicken dance I want you to do that. right now and I know you're gonna laugh. but I'm gonna tell you right now the. funky chickens movements open up the. passageways in your lungs that get the. virus out so I want you to do that right. now and I want you to do it outside of. your house. because it's you need the fresh air can.

you do the running man can you do the. running man right now can you let me. tell you why the running man increases. circulation in such a way that the virus. is less able to bind to your red blood. cells can you do the running man right. now. can you put you a video of you doing the. running man on your Instagram account. right now can you do that let me ask you. another question and this is gonna seem. but you guys stick with me I'm the head. pulmonologist can you do blackface can.

you do let me tell you why blackface. helps if you put blackface on your face. the virus gets scared because the virus. is racist you know the way Asians feel. about blacks the virus is very racist so. if you do blackface the virus doesn't. get in there do you see what I mean you. want to keep going yeah we gotta like. this oh yeah no it doesn't feel that. good he said do it he said can you [ __ ].

I said probably not do it you [ __ ] do. it do it. and then who is this. can load she said he heard me so we. wanted to keep this out of my lungs and. he said it's in your lungs and you got. the right fear and you got the wrong. approach. you can't wait it out he said you have. to fight I'm not in some silly. metaphorical way. this isn't about like channeling rocky. or eye of the tiger you've got to do the. things that will beat this virus you've. got to breathe deep when it hurts and it.

hurts I know it hurts and I'm not trying. to minimize anybody's pain when you get. a fever spiked and that hurts he said. you can't take confidence that it's. gonna go down they're gonna be spikes. for at least 10 days when you get a. fever you got a layer up you got a drink. you got it's amazing about this virus by. the way no and we're done with him but. nobody has any clue at all what's going. on like nobody has any like not a clue. right no but fever for 10 day like what.

are we saying here what are we talking. about what is going on nobody has a clue. now they said you read something says. soap doesn't do anything ventilators. make it worse doesn't kill the. coronavirus yeah yeah ventilators make. it worse soon they're gonna say hand. sanitizer spreads it like whoa what do. you know hand sanitizer. you like this too now it's saying 13. feet well these are scare monger. articles these coronavirus found in air. samples up to 13 feet away another thing.

they don't know if it's infectious. particles or not like you know listen. man. they found corona virus on that cruise. ship the diamond princess the Grand. Princess whatever-it-was did that what. was it called diamond princess I want to. go on a cruise to the diamond princess I. want to go how you're gonna love it. it's the Diamond Princess cruise I want.

it to go somewhere in Mexico but nowhere. scary the diamond princess only. seventeen percent of people on the boat. contracted the virus which means and. listen to me because I am a. microbiologist okay I you know I have a. doctorate and by. uncle engineering I've worked you know. people know what I am that material on. the on this it's the RNA of the virus.

the RNA the ribonucleic acid that the. RNA of the virus not the infectious. material so it's not infectious after 17. days they don't know if the particles in. the air 13 feet away from you are. infectious or not they just don't know. no one knows they keep saying fast food. and [ __ ] safe so I went to Taco Bell the. other day and I'm even on the drives. from like this ain't safe there's no way. this is okay they just want poor people. to die. everything poor people do is safe by the.

way they let get drive-throughs is safe. yeah sucking a guy off on a bus is safe. yeah there's no risk and sucking a guy. off on a bus listen if that's how you. make your money and we can send less of. a stimulus out that's safe yeah hooking. is safe yes selling your [ __ ] on the. street is absolutely safe for Kovan 19. don't worry about it. ya know sell an illegal weapon it. doesn't on guns is fine it doesn't live. on guns I've at it doesn't live on guns.

have at it animals have at it we took. sports away the least we can give you is. a little gunplay in the street to make. up for it you need to do something. special they really are letting the poor. die they just don't give a [ __ ] and what. I I'm like amazed you're like they can't. say that postmates cuz by the way posts. mates is it's all the same risk we had. [ __ ] delivery tonight they're gonna. be korone on a napkin nobody knows it's. all the same risk you leave your house.

it's a risk just everything's a risk I'm. getting an antibody test to see if I had. it I want to know if I had it and if it. if it if I did not have it I will throw. a fit this is what we're all gonna do. because by the way no one had it. everyone's full of [ __ ] I love these. things people like I was he was anyone. else sick in December it was the sickest. I'd ever been into. so it was late December early January.

and I was sick was anyone else sick like. that man. yes I was sick I was too your people get. sick you [ __ ] morons it's not kovat. 19 no now I was sick in early March and. I was from coming back from Vancouver. and there was there are many Asians a. lovely proud people but many of them. lived in Vancouver I'm just saying.

that's what it is so I'm thinking that. perhaps I got the virus in Vancouver and. I brought it back here and I think I had. it in early March I was diagnosed which. trap but then I had a call for three. weeks I had a fever I it was bad I was. sweating I was said some little chills. and whatever it was not good so I think. I had kovat 19 I think I had Corona no I. don't know if I did and and what's gonna. happen is we're all gonna take these. antibody tests and they're gonna show.

that none of us had the corona virus and. we're all gonna flip out and say those. tests aren't real and they're not. effective and that the person who gave. it to us can [ __ ] off cuz we know we had. it they're idiots out there they're like. I know I had it I know for a fact I had. it I had every symptom of it then they. started listening these symptoms are not. at all karana virus my stomach hurt I. stubbed my toe it's like no that's not. it you goon guys the Tim Dylan show is.

always looking to make you comfortable. stylish and safe here's a reality right. now it is so important to be able to. have something that you carry on you. that you can sanitize easily and that is. a ridge wallet Ridge wallet is the best. why what is it Ben it's what's the thing. it's metal right yeah it's a minimal. front pocket wallet that's designed to. streamline what you carry every day. what's kind of metal is it titanium yeah.

that's a carbon fiber and titanium so it. comes in titanium them right carbon. fiber aluminum titanium easily dude you. put a little hand sanitizer on your hand. you sanitize the ridge and super easy. you got a big leather wallet you can't. really do that it becomes a problem you. know easily sanitize surfaces is the. move right now okay especially with the. outbreak of corona virus okay Ridge well. it's great we all use them I have it Ben.

has it ten percent off today Ridge comm. slash t IM ridge comm slash t IM use the. code t IM link in description i'll tell. you this man that's i mean other than. the fact that it's a great wallet it. streamlines everything you don't want. these big wallets it's easier you carry. some cash and cards boom it forces you. to be organized it forces you to. eliminate the [ __ ] you don't need in. your life you know i mean i think a.

perfect rich wallet is 100 dollar bill. to do cocaine with your lawyers card. your your credit card debit card. whatever and a picture of somebody you. know where you're really gonna do some. bad you look at them again. I shouldn't that's a perfect Ridge set. you don't really need much more than. that but also right now man it's so easy. to sanitize that becomes so important. you take a lie Sol wipe to the ridge. you're good there's too many creeks and. crevices in a big leather wallet and.

people are going to be killed by having. them cuz Corona is gonna jump out of one. of the compartments and [ __ ] you in your. face is that what you want you want. Corona to [ __ ] your nose hole now so I. would get Ridge I have Ridge but if I. didn't have Ridge I ded Ridge I kill my. family to earn the money to get Ridge. I'll tell you that much if I had to I. don't give a [ __ ] I'd call from my. grandma it came down to what I get -.

goddamn Ridge though it's got thirty. thousand five star reviews it's a better. way to carry your cash and cards I cut. my best friend's throat a fate if I. could get a Ridge wallet swear to god. there's no oath I wouldn't break I'd. sell this country out for a rich wallet. I'd walk right into China with all our. nuclear secrets [ __ ] and Shanghai with a. ridge wallet and watch them black. [ __ ] out of us everybody I know and. everything I know go up in a mushroom. cloud I'm just sitting there with a.

ridge wallet I don't give a [ __ ]. not even more than one just one I. wouldn't even need more than one you. just need one there's nothing I really. wouldn't do for a Ridge wallet Ridge. well it mmm. Red Robin mmm. those gonna be the only restaurants that. survive AG Red Robin yeah all the good. ones you're gonna go away but the people. that need to read Robin don't give a. [ __ ] they'll go right in there they'll. go right in there in a hospital gown. discharged from the hospital that walk.

right into Red Robin and I give a [ __ ]. Red Robin mmm Ridge wallet mmm do it. folks Ridge wallet is gonna be very. important in the fight against AIDS and. coronavirus easy sanitize I'd get AIDS. if I could get a Ridge wallet not even. HIV full-blown AIDS inject me with a. needle of full-blown AIDS right into my.

eyeball just give me a Ridge you could. blind me I could be deaf dumb and blind. I just want to feel that Ridge feel that. cool titanium in my hand would you kill. your fiancee for Ridge I mean I already. have one you mean like if I didn't have. one if you didn't have one you know what. I'm saying would you strangle your. fiancee for a ridge I mean know what let.

me ask you why not because it's just a. wallet like it's a [ __ ] this is why. Ben is not really successful in life he. can't commit to anything cuz he's a. [ __ ] okay he's a [ __ ] she doesn't. listen to this [ __ ] show by the way. she doesn't [ __ ] listen to the show. she's listening to Tom Segura who'd pays. you zero money so she should keep. listening to that network you've earned. not a dollar from anyway Ridge calm. slash Jim Hughes code P I am buy the.

[ __ ] wallet okay enough already I got. from a friend. got to hand sanitizer it's a lavender. hand sanitizer with a very high alcohol. content and when I spread it all over my. hands I breathe it in deep because it. smells like gin and I used to love. Beefeater gin I spent years in a pool of. lukewarm Beefeater gin Beefeater in and. out. martini meaning you put the vermouth in.

the glass and by the way if you are a. drinker out there please enjoy this. cocktail and and and I'll tell you. exactly how to do it I don't usually. give cocktail recommendations on the. program because I am a degenerate. alcoholic so many people are disturbed. when I do that but take some vermouth. extra dry vermouth you swirl it around. the glass you throw it out in and out in. and out the martini go right out there. then you put then you take the gin you. stir the [ __ ] gin you don't shake it. like you're a 24 year old [ __ ].

bartender in West Hollywood whose. [ __ ] shake in the gin and trying to. see how many [ __ ] she can fit in her so. she can pay a rent that ain't it okay. you're not gonna you're not shaking a. [ __ ] thing and bruising the goddamn. gin waiting for your [ __ ] seeking. arrangement state to pick you up and. take you to his [ __ ] house. enough you're stirring the gin you stir. it. shaking it bruises it it splits in lines.

from James Bond it's absolutely true and. let me tell you right now I threw my. life away for this trick I mean I threw. my life away for this drink this Studios. in an apartment in a Hollywood I am more. talented than 90% of people that live in. this city and they all live in castles. so the reality is I am [ __ ] and it was. because of this cocktail I've not had a. meaningful relationship in my life. because it is cocktail I have very few.

friends the ones I have that I've had. for a very long time I'd strongly. dislike I I have no honesty with myself. or others I am a shell of a human being. genuine shell of a human being I live to. entertain people to make them happy for. nothing for no reason I barely enjoy. that it's just. what I have to do I'm built to do. nothing else I'm just a vector of. negative energy that will either go into. a heroin needle or go into a stupid joke.

I tell it [ __ ] you know the [ __ ]. you know the giggle [ __ ] the giggle. Pig which should be the name of a comedy. club in is it. welcome to the giggle Pig don't take out. your phones this is art but what I'm. saying is all of that happen I should. have been I should have came out of the. closet earlier I should have did the. right thing I shouldn't went to college. I didn't do any of that. I was his subprime mortgages I was dumb. enough to sell the product to myself I. sold the house to myself you're not.

supposed to get so drunk you scammed. yourself i scammed myself the Enron. idiots weren't buying their own bed [ __ ]. like you know so I did it all for this. perfect drink it is a perfect trick and. I'm glad I was an alcoholic when I look. back on the world I'm glad it wasn't you. know family friends accomplishments I. know a lot of people with those and I. got to be honest with you truly it's. truly or whatever. your kids are [ __ ] half the time they.

take advantage of you they don't value. the sacrifices you made for them your. wife or husband doesn't really care and. and and your career you hit a wall with. that and no one really gives a [ __ ]. truly no one cares I just watched a. documentary about a bunch of comedians. that came out of New York City in the. alt scene and everything and some of. them are funny and some of them aren't. but the point is truly no one kidding no. one cares no one cares you care about. david dobrik and they're not gonna care. about him soon they won't care about him. soon they'll care about something that.

just makes sounds and Biebs they'll go. give the better educator your kids like. the most will be somebody that goes so. it's over and nothing matters so you. take the vermouth and you swirl it. around in the glass you spill it out and. then you put the gin which should be and. this is another great line which isn't. mine I don't know who wrote this vodka. goes down too easy gin drinkers like to. know what you're up against that's why I.

didn't like Bombay Sapphire it's too. smooth I like Beefeater I like a little. punch I. like a little punch in the back of the. throat of juniper berry and botanical. and lavender I like to feel where I'm. going cuz this listen martinis gin. martinis take you to the moon martinis. are like breasts. one is not enough two is alright three. is too many. four is a party I didn't do that either. that's something else I don't know a guy. told me that name Huey he's dead the. point is this he had a lot of great.

he said one other thing that I left so. hard it wasn't his but he remembered it. he goes. she brought he said this at dinner he. goes she broke my heart so I broke her. jaw again I don't know where you got it. it's probably the famous thing it's very. funny anyway he was I saying you're just. describing yeah so the dress takes you. to the moon it takes you to the moon you. get [ __ ] up when you get banged up on. martinis you get bang the [ __ ] up you do.

not I mean it's a bad it's a boom like. you are it's no word like you're at work. to next day with a pounding headache. it's a real hangover you got to do a. couple of percocet in the morning or a. couple of vicodin with that with that. [ __ ] Starbucks latte and that Newport. or marlboro menthol light or Marlboro. light or Marlboro red or Parliament you. get the idea or vape the point is and. I've smoked all those cigarettes that's. why I went through them the point is I.

used to smoke basic unfiltered yeah back. when I was a kid I was 13 years old in. my friend Shay got a pack a basic. unfiltered we got a pack one they have. Benson & Hedges we used to just buy. different types of cigarettes L&M. Liggett & Myers what a good documentary. about cigarettes not about how [ __ ] up. they are about the tradition of tobacco. which did probably have to do that's. probably that's gets into slaves.

but not that I mean a recent like what. were all the cigarette companies and I'm. interested in I want to know about that. I'm gonna die one day because of them I. want to know more about them not just a. rat documentary like rat Leah Remini. everybody hates Scientology now that. they're millionaires but they didn't. they didn't hate it they didn't mind. torturing the kids when it was getting. them all the opportunities I see you. rats you're all full of [ __ ] okay you. don't do something for thirty [ __ ]. years and then decide it's not for you.

shut the [ __ ] up go out like the [ __ ]. mafia and suck David Miscavige's dick. alright anyway the drink this is my. point here I keep getting back I keep it. away from this but the drink but the. vermouth then put to gin no olives. olives are for women my boss told me. that my boss was uh guy named Tim that I. worked for him mortgages had a scar. across his face he said I said how did. you get that because I was thrown out of. a car at four years old through the.

windshield I said that's crazy he goes. yeah he goes it taught me about. responsibility no one knew what that. meant. no one asked him but he said Allah's are. for women it's a great point if you of a. blue cheese stuff olive in your mouth. you're a woman that's it or you're gay I. guess we could say that but even gay. guys predominantly are probably I don't. know I don't know that the martini. people martinis are for you know. martinis are for people that want to go.

to the moon they don't have to want to. go to the moon with a drink or two they. don't have time to sit there for the. whole they need to be [ __ ] up by the. appetizer I needed to be in the bag by. the appetizer if bruschetta or tuna. tartare hit the table and I wasn't in a. bag we had a problem I needed to have. that gin glow on my face that heat that. heat on my face before the appetizer hit. the table so it's very important that. you make to drink the right way just.

just lukewarm gin in a martini glass. you can even I didn't have removed. sometimes I just do it with the gin it's. nice if you have a martini shaker you. could do it in a milk glass you know big. bar glass water glass you can do that. little stir you know it's it's here's. the thing folks and a lot of people. won't tell you this it's it is classy to. throw your life away drinking. certain drinks martinis kettle on the.

rocks whiskey bourbon scotch. they're nice something nice about. throwing your life away like that not. beer. that's low-rent but like a liquor. alcoholic I always said good for him. that's somebody that knows where they're. going and that really wants to get there. as quickly as possible when you were. boozing it up you drank beer right light. beer that's light be I mean you can't. can even be proud of that but you didn't.

even have a good with it what did you. drink from college to what you were till. to what like 19 to like 25 yeah yeah I. would say that was me too I think I was. like 19 and 25 because I was drugs from. 13 to 20 and of course from 20 to 25 as. well but I I got into booze when I was. done with all the other drugs when I. quit everything else I moved into booze. I graduated to booze the good old kettle.

one on the rocks with a black fly in the. glass from the good old bartenders at. Lisa's lounge but that's that's what I. mean you know I threw my entire life. away for that drink and I don't regret. it either I don't it was a great there's. nothing better than a Sunday afternoon. getting shit-faced yeah and going to. sleep in your car yeah you know you know. getting really sure there was a place. called Churchill's and Rockville Center.

and I was asked to leave twice because I. think one of the women in Churchill's. one of the women I was I was drunk and. it was 11 a.m. and I was telling my. table of people how important it was. that we continue to support the people. of Iraq by sending more troops and money. I was screaming and top my lungs and. yelling and a woman started screaming at. me from across - you don't know what. you're talking about I and I was.

screaming and I was drunk I think I. called her a terrorist and I was asked. to leave. I was really rare and ago I believed in. the Bush administration. and then I and then I stopped doing. cocaine and drinking and then I was like. wow it's amazing what happens when you. start looking at things through the lens. of somebody that's you know not doing. cocaine and drinking daily you do get a.

better idea of what's going on in the. world I mean I used to go nuts like I. used to get coked out of my face. put a bunch of friends in my suburban. drive around and really wealthy areas in. Long Island and point to the houses and. go they deserve this money. hey desire yeah better than we are. screaming sweating screaming and my. friends like yeah yeah back of the car. they were terrified they're like are we.

gonna die what's wrong with this guy. I mean they deserve it don't take their. money make your own money and then. sometimes the car would run out of gas. like in the middle of those cuz I hadn't. put gas in it I would just stand outside. of the car screaming just smoking. cigarettes and screaming like what I say. I completely destroyed my life I mean. you know it's I'm sure you know there's. elements of it that are fun but you know. I should have just vlogged that's what I.

should have done I should have logged. everything I liked about the world is. live other than this podcast everything. I like you stand up and you know what. that music theater all that [ __ ] so. alive it's in a stage it's real things. can go wrong. you know floggings edited and that's the. generation we live and we live we live. now in the time of editing and every all. and everything you put out there for the. most part a lot of these guys and some. of them are really talented at the way. they do this and editing is certainly a.

talents skill some would say it's an art. form they'd be you know whatever but. that's what we are we're living in an. edited we're living in a time of editing. and everybody's adding it and what I. always was drawn to was live unedited. [ __ ] it was raw and it was right in. front of you and if it [ __ ] sucked it. sucked and if it was great it was great. and if it was. somewhere in the middle which it usually. was it was somewhere in the middle and. maybe it had moments of brilliance it.

maybe didn't and maybe it tipped at the. end and you were bored but it wasn't. ever you couldn't duplicate it you. couldn't play it back you couldn't show. your friend unless they were standing. next to you there was something cool. about that that's why I've always liked. restaurants and it's why I like comedy. shows I like things you that even though. there's a level of consistency it's one. and done like it's just - yeah we had a. great dinner and then we went back to. her nights and it we sucked and then you. like what was it even good you see comic.

destroy then you see him the next time. with the same jokes and it doesn't work. you're like wait a minute that magic was. gone was it the audience was it him was. it her what was it you know see that's. what we're moving away from we're moving. into this world where everything is. edited and everybody's going to be able. to release the parts of themselves you. know that they think are the best and. it's just it's gonna suck I'm a little. depressed about you know how tough it's. gonna be for live performance let's read.

let's read an ad here we're gonna read. it in real time the Tim Dylan show is. brought to you by the Bill and Melinda. Gates Foundation Bill and Melinda Gates. we stick a needle in the third world and. see what happens. that many of you are angry that Bill and. Melinda have sponsored the show you've. accused me of shilling for them they did. buy ads they did commit to ads you know. Bill and Melinda Gates are going all.

over the third-world sticking needles. and children and seeing how they react. and that's heroic. I think it's heroic they are weird. aren't they those two they are a little. off I'm not an anti-vaxxer I think we. need vaccinations but you know the. reality is I don't research these. companies that make vaccinations and I. don't know what Bill and Melinda are up. to I'm always very suspicious when they. go well we're billionaires but now we. want to save the world and it's like. okay and listen maybe they are I don't.

know I don't know anything about I. really I don't know much about them you. know I know they're doing some [ __ ] up. [ __ ] in the third. world like the things they're doing and. I guess their attitude is well these. kids are gonna die anyway so I don't. know but they're I'm very skilled listed. them everybody the way the people. looking at conspiracies now the problem. is everybody's like they're trying to. surveil me and everything it's like. they're let's set folks you I don't want. to I don't want to I want to break this. to you and in a way that's you've got.

nothing left you know like you you don't. have anything left here. nobody's serve it like everybody's like. the new thing is like tick tock like. David hog is like we got a band tick. tock. cuz it's a Chinese national security. weapon because the Chinese they have all. that access to you know all these kids. have access to everything they have got. all that data of the kid what trying to. invest in all of that in tick tock to. prove what our kids are retards you tell. me we couldn't email China and said that.

yeah our kids are sociopaths that dance. around doesn't matter what's happening. we could light the world on fire they. literally dance I mean that's the big. what is this surveillance where you know. listen I'm not saying you should have. been concerned about surveillance years. and years and years and years ago this. isn't new remember how none of you gave. a [ __ ] because Osama bin Laden was gonna. come down the chimney and cut all your. throats and now everybody's concerned. about surveillance have been surveilling.

had been reading to do it every day. you didn't care to a [ __ ] month ago. you shouldn't care so it's again which. Monday morning quarterbacking the whole. thing then you're not gonna win the. government in this country if you ever. pose a serious threat to them they're. going to vaporize you in some matter. your car goes into a tree they leak a. bunch of info anja they find they audit. your but they will they will break your. spirit or they'll break your head that's.

just what happens if you get to be a big. enough threat this is not to defend any. of the new surveillance measures this is. not to say you shouldn't be vigilant. this is not to say you shouldn't pay. attention to what's going on but this is. to make you honestly understand that. everybody in this country acts like they. woke up and learned. everything today everybody acts like it. just dawned on them that things are. [ __ ] this minute where have you been.

where were you where were you when this. was going on through Obama before Obama. during Bush where were you then I just. don't understand I understand you know. there's nothing to take here they don't. care about your lives as much as you. think they do they just want you to work. and earn money and they don't want you. to have health insurance and they don't.

want you to be able to have the money to. challenge them in and they don't want. you to have the type of democratic. representation that you should have. that's why they [ __ ] gerrymander and. [ __ ] up the districts all the goddamn. time they'd rather you not vote they. don't want you to do anything this is. and this is all a problem by the way I'm. not saying none of it's a problem but. like this idea that like they're spying. on me it's like yeah it's a it's a it's. an issue and they're spying on you. because they want to sell you more crap. for the most part they want to sell your.

data to people so they could sell you. more [ __ ] so they can find that the best. way to market a pizza right down your. throat if they could drone pizzas down. your throat that's what a lot of it is. and yes if you start kicking up dust and. and challenging the status quo which. none of you do anyway but if you were to. do that like mr. michael hastings then. you meet the tree you meet mr. tree so. that's what it is I'm not trying to be. black pilling I don't want to be.

dispirit in here but these this this pad. everyone's at level 12 panic about. everything but nobody cared you know. they're gonna vaccinate us all yeah. probably gonna be a vaccination for this. we probably need it they're gonna put. chips in us that's a problem I don't I. don't want any of that I don't want any. of that that's that's a bad road to go. down but again it's you know they might.

not think I might not put a chip in yeah. they might take off. they don't need to they don't need to. put a chip in you to control you they're. already kind of controlling you all the. things that you think you're not going. to be allowed to do you'll probably be. allowed to do them you're gonna be. allowed to go out to the buffalo heart. and order the fire you know you're gonna. be able to go out and go to the Fried. Chicken and grenade stand that you like. you're gonna be able to do that but it's. you if you again if you try to like.

unionize you try to get some [ __ ]. money yourself respect or try to say hey. I don't want to come in today I've got. Corona they're gonna say [ __ ] you get in. here and die on the factory floor that. they're gonna do so be a little more. concerned about nobody's concerned about. any of that by the way. nobody cares about any of that it's all. about Satan and it's an ancient. religious war and no it's not when you. really figure out what it is. it's the ultimate black pill cuz it's. not Satan and [ __ ] what you people.

think it's trade routes when you figure. out the whole thing. the blackmail the nightmares the murder. it's all to protect ports and trade. routes and ways to get oil to the. Caspian Sea and ways to protect. interests of very wealthy people it's. the ultimate black well you like you're. doing all this so that billionaires can. be trillionaires. that's it it's not because it's some. blood oath some ancient religion please. tell me it's at least that please wait a.

minute you're not even lizard you're not. a let you we're the same species and you. treat me like this. it's even worse I wish they were lizards. it would make you feel better you'd at. least get to go to bed and go oh they're. lizards though they're the same species. and they still don't give a [ __ ]. they've got the same blood in their. veins or not [ __ ] you know when I say. their lives is from another planet to. joke it's scarier that they're from this. planet and they don't give a [ __ ] about.

you and all the [ __ ] they do the. skullenbones are [ __ ] all the all the. weird stuff yes they're morbid [ __ ]. people yes they're a cult. yes blah blah blah but what drives it. what drives the secret groups and what. drives to seek. see and the bonding and the blackmail is. money it's the ability to earn money and. to have nobody get in the way of them. earning money ah listen so when the. conspiracy talk gets going I'm I'm with. you I just don't want to hear about time.

machines I don't want to hear about. queuing aah I don't want to hear about. Donald Trump you give it a time machine. I don't wanna hear JFK jr. still alive. tell me something normal tell me the. government blew up the Federal Building. in Oklahoma that's something I'll. discuss over brunch when we're allowed. to have it. tell me about 9/11 talk to me about you. know the Boston Marathon bombing and by. the way Raycom prod up a great point. today he said no shootings none of these. kids are shooting anybody with Kovac 19. you want you start to wonder if some of.

these school shootings are not as random. as they appear because nobody's gone. into a farmers market with a gun and. don't go do that now that I've said it. but the point is that when you start. thinking about it and I'm not saying the. school shootings are fake or staged what. I'm saying is that it is interesting. it's it's very there hasn't been any. random acts of violence since this you. know there hasn't been any of that. that's kind of gone you know they. canceled that too I got right we're like.

day 31 and just nothing nothing. interesting maybe these random acts of. violence we all experience aren't so. random I told you it's gonna be. conservative show today I told you that. early on and that might matter today was. not the episode for you but what I'm. saying is that I know there's a call to. people out there I'm not saying you're. aren't trust me I'm well aware of it I. know more about it than you I've had. more people I've had real conversations.

if you join the patreon that you took to. Nick Bryant he'll [ __ ] scare the [ __ ]. out of you and he scared the [ __ ] out of. me with that episode and it was [ __ ]. wild read about the finders read about. the [ __ ] they're into know the FBI said. that actually the finders warrant up. will you shut up the FBI said if you. ever start a sense with the FBI said and. it's not a complete joke I have no. respect. for you well the FBI people are.

murderers the FBI so yeah go read about. that stuff but then just don't [ __ ]. come out the other way telling me that. you know Tom Hanks is running a global. and I don't know anything about him he. seems sweet but a lot of people so did. Harvey Weinstein he seemed like a big. teddy bear cuz he is now I I don't know. these people you can't say what they're.

into what they're not into her I don't. go to these parties I don't know these. people it is what it is you know living. with chronic pain is the worst it's more. than a feeling of discomfort it can. affect your whole life many of my. listeners probably have some type of. pain that has prevented them from. relaxing and sleeping any much of it is. internal isn't it guys but some of it is. external. maybe you can't exercise because you. pain podcast host to provide experience. of recent pain I do get lower back pain.

enter Oh max health if you're looking at. rid of nagging muscle and joint pain. immediately while providing long lasting. recovery then you need to try the. natural breakthrough pain relief. solution cryofreeze CBD roll-on. developed by Omak south and i have tried. this and i do like it. it's non-prescription it's a triple. action pain relief roll-on and it's. specially formulated to block pain. receptors reduce inflammation and prove. muscle and joint flexibility so 100%. natural CBD powered remedy works its.

magic within ten minutes of application. and it lasts about eight hours it's a. better version of a like a salonpas or a. what's the what's the other thing what's. the other thing you put on your back. like it's a you know like a icy freeze. or i see how icy hi yeah or salonpas. like that a little bit this is a better. version of it I think because I've used. this other ones too you know and listen.

they're gonna give you 20% off if you. have this you want to try it out if you. enjoy the show it's a great way to. support the show and relieve some pain. cryofreeze CBD pain relief roll-on plus. free shipping this discount also applies. towards any products i. why just go - Oh max health.com today. and enter code Tim OMA X HEA LTH calm. today an entry code Tim that's Oh max. health.com. enter code Tim to get 20% off cryofreeze.

and site-wide so you've got other things. as well still not sold I could tell you. pro athletes such as PGA pro golfer kyle. Stanley uses cryofreeze CBD to recover. both on and off the course go look at. the product review is 95% five-star. review it's not a [ __ ] product this. is actually good and it works if you. have the pain if you have a problem. lower back joint pain muscles things. like that this is an easy fix it's an. easy fix you know if you're like me. you're an ex-addict and you don't want.

to take CBD another way this is a great. way to just put it on the part of you. that hurts and it works its magic it's. an anti-inflammatory it really works. [ __ ] ten times better than a leave. and [ __ ] like that and those are not. good anyway because this is all-natural. one of the reasons coronavirus is. ravaging our countries we have very bad. immune healthier it's we're in love with. over-the-counter drugs they make. billions and billions of dollars. slinging is dayquil and all this. horseshit that barely works right you. take it it barely makes you feel better. you really it prolongs coughs and colds.

for the most part you could just get rid. of it if your immune system was stronger. it's a reality so it's great about the. CBD cryofreeze things you can put them. on there an anti-inflammatory but. they're also all-natural you know you. don't if there's no dependence you don't. develop any type of you know addiction. to it it just gets rid of pain and it. makes a lot of sense so that's oma. exhale calm enter code Tim to get 20%. off cryofreeze and site-wide so if. there's other stuff that interests you. on there too you're gonna get 20% off if.

you use promo code Tim Oh max health. comm we're gonna try to get Alex Jones. on the show I want I want him to talk. about what's going on right now you know. and I don't care if you'd like it or not. I want to have Roseanne on the program. to have her talk about what's going on. right now I'd like to get Chris Hedges. on the show I want to get all of these. people on the show I don't care that you. know my biggest disappointment with some. of the people that listen to. shows when I talk to someone who. disagree with you can't handle it you. look good stupid you guys you shouldn't.

do that you know I mean or or when I. talk to somebody that you find dangerous. it's like listen man. quarantines gonna end we're gonna have. to go back to work NBC pull up Drudge. NBC's already these big companies are. starting to figure out how to get people. back to work okay. fear of second wave in summer cities. began canceling fourth of July events. feds cuff feds cover up nursing home.

deaths testing botched nursing home. deaths at pump that nothing to do with. coronavirus just people in nursing homes. bludgeoned you know that's what I mean. like everybody's like trying to lied. about the amount of deaths I'm like wait. what America is gonna be like hold my. beer right wait till we start burning. down nursing homes that's odd. I never was trying to collapse that. Hotel Beverly Hills orders face masks.

worn in public well that's where I walk. around every day I wear them in public. you're wearing it now when you go I'm. wearing it yeah I did it today I come. down here it's come to this if you want. to go for walk at Beverly Hills into. anything else outdoors in that city. you're gonna have to cover your face. city officials have decreed that. everyone must sport some type of face. covered when they leave their homes see. this is when I would love to be able to. start a business immediately and have. the infrastructure to start making like. bedazzled masks yeah because you know.

you would make a couple of MIL selling. kind of fun crazy face masks yeah that's. the type of [ __ ] I wish I could snap my. fingers and then have that. infrastructure you know Beverly Hills. mayor Lester Friedman that's the name of. the pimp and casino right is that true. yeah Sharon Stone's boyfriend and casino. last year Friedman that's [ __ ]. hilarious.

yeah I guarantee you it's less or less. or daimond is it Lester diamond it's. Lester dime and I think okay oh that. sucks I thought it was last year. Friedman I don't know but the mayor of. Beverly Hills yeah Lester diamond the. mayor of Beverly Hills says you gotta. have a mask on to walk around Beverly. Hills what happens if you don't have a. mask by the way that's what I'm trying.

to find out you know what are they gonna. do they probably site you you probably. get a little ticket we promise it. doesn't say law it says it's a rule it's. a rule I don't even know I don't even. know anymore folks I'm getting a little. tired of this I'm a little tired I'm a. little tired of the scientific community. not knowing anything and I think I want. them to open stop feeding the media all. this info if you don't know anything. someone cut the media is starting to. [ __ ] get out of control now they're. scaring everybody it's true conservative.

show today but I'm dead serious up Trump. - he's [ __ ] up he's not doing anything. right for anybody but the media's like. the coronavirus lives in your ass you. know it's like stop I'm trying to sleep. coronavirus can come in and [ __ ] you in. your mouth at night it's like how about. know where the scientists they don't. [ __ ] know anything turn it off. turning engine it off Italy extends.

locked out despite business pressure. dude Italy remember the beginning Italy. was singing to each other on their. balconies and now they are stealing food. cuz they're desperate and hungry and. this is the future of America and I'm. telling you right now I don't want. anybody to get sick and I understand why. we had to do this but we got to figure. out a way to start opening the economies. back because not we're poor vulnerable.

people get get killed because that's. what's happening now but we got to. figure out a way whether it's you know. testing mitigation to be get because. this thing will spiral out of control. very quickly without even the idea we. need. the idea that that we're gonna come back. even if it's even if it's not the. reality in the near term we need the. idea that we're gonna come back which is.

why they were talking several big. companies you're like listen we're gonna. have people come in try to find that NBC. companies you know big companies. thinking about how they're gonna be. bring people back to work how they're. gonna bring their workforce back here's. the thing guys until schools are in. session there is no way right there it's. still school until schools are in. session. there is never we're not gonna be back. in business because people need to watch. their kids so the reality is you need to.

put the [ __ ] kids in school before. people can go back to anything that. seems like normal sitting so here's what. they're doing okay they're saying this. they're basically saying that they're. gonna try to start to bring people back. a lot of companies are gonna start to. bring people back into early May. Chrysler Tesla ball saying they begin. production again on May 4th.

these are factories and they're gonna. take some you know as many precautions. and steps as they need to some things. and this is great interesting they said. for some things demand will snap back. immediately. dentists health care barbershops there's. a backlog of demand people need haircuts. they need appointments at a dentist. health care so those are things that. immediately people gonna need to do. restaurants and bars people might want. to go they're all cooped up they might.

want to go out if they're open are. people gonna start buying new cars and. new homes that's gonna be a bit take a. beat on that that's gonna be a little. bit of an issue you know I mean people. are not gonna be making big purchases. immediately okay if they can help it. it's gonna be a gradual process this is. the article here all right any return to. work will be a gradual process rather. than setting a national go back to the. office -. still many companies are ready in a.

hurry to get employees back to work well. they don't care they don't care people. die that's the other problem these. companies don't give a [ __ ] Goldman. Sachs is gonna build like an infrared. you know they're gonna get infrared. technology to see if you have a fever. but you can also be asymptomatic for 14. days without a fever so child care is. the big one one major limitation of any. reopening will be child care where are. you gonna put these kids now your kids. are home they're stealing your heroin. and they're stealing your bullets and.

your gun they got to go back to school. you know these kids are little demons. they're on the dark web [ __ ] trying. to figure out the best route as soon as. school opens up to try to figure out the. best route through to back with dak you. got to get him out of your [ __ ] house. little tick tock monsters I can't wait. till the governor's like the retards in.

the middle of the country because a lot. of them are [ __ ] start just letting. people out and just it'll be a bloodbath. or maybe not we don't know what's that. guy Tate Reeves. in Mississippi what's the Mississippi. governor's name he's my favorite Tate. Reeves yeah he's like a character can we. play some Tate Reeves. he's like a character. they're my dirt Mississippi brother was.

one of the fattest states in the country. Mississippi by the way is just it's look. it you can't see this everybody I wish. we had to switch her which is. backordered I wish we could show you. this here's mine here's my big issue now. I'm gonna be very honest with everybody. when did the sign language people start. losing their minds dude the sign. language people have become so. distracting that people with ears cannot.

listen because they've become so extra. have you ever seen a [ __ ] sign. language but they're like this you like. [Music]. it's like what the [ __ ] going on. what kind of theatrical sign language is. that like this is there every sign. language interpreter looks like this is. their moment like they're gonna get. picked up they're gonna get discovered. while they're doing sign language next.

to the Mississippi Governor comment the. [ __ ] down some of us still have ears and. we're trying to pay attention and you're. dancing in the upper right hand corner. of the screen. and it's distracting you literally look. like you're having a full-scale seizure. on on this what is this how many deaf. people in there that we need to have. this me and Ray we're talking about this. I I you know the Deaf are really tough. the blind are lovely because they're. more vulnerable but the Deaf er is very. nasty people for the most part that's.

that's the reality you know okay I you. like Marlee Matlin fine the deaf for an. issue and I've sympathy for them but I'm. saying enough with the the sign language. people that have lost their [ __ ]. minds they're preventing people from. getting the information because people. like what is wrong with that person what. is wrong I mean the guy here and we're. gonna show you this because this will be. the clip from the show but this gun is. this guy never in my life have I seen.

anything like what I'm looking at right. now screenshot this and throw this on. the this great yeah you you you have to. see this because this is completely out. of control and and by the way it's not. only him it's every whether it's de. Blasio whether it's coma every sign. language interpreter is going crazy they. are signing so big it is wild and it is.

incredibly distrait throws you off your. eyes travel to the sign language person. and you start you're like what is that. even sign like this Trump have one I. don't know he might he problems about. this yeah let's see what a Reeves that's. to say he looks I personally wouldn't. hold one if I was a pastor but I don't. think what was happening. Sunday based on what I've seen is in. violation of my original order I've been.

clear that no American government has. the right to threaten to lock someone up. for practicing their faith that is not. legal and it is not right in Mississippi. churches are protected from over-the-top. actions like these that is spelled out. in our executive order I've said many. many times and I'm going to say is sign. language guy looks homeless I mean I've. never sign language God looks like he. has coronavirus and he looks like he's.

signing honest I mean he's got this. weird black shirt the only other person. I've seen where that is the great Raycom. yeah you know it's the only other person. that was a black shirt is Ray Kampf this. guy and lounge singers that we're like a. black weird type of shirt like this it's. like a weird dude Tate Reeves looks he's. like hang tight raves I've been clear no. government can't can't put people in. jail for worshipping their faith. worshiping their God which I agree hey.

Tate I agree with you I also think we. got to be a little you know keep keep. playing Tate Reeves please I'm gonna get. a job working friend and I will admit it. pains me to do so but I do not think. anyone should attend gatherings of any. type including church services with more. than 10 people there okay. this is still America we still hold our. religious liberties dear I'll be happy. to answer questions about that but I. want to make clear for all local.

officials who are wondering as we enter. the second week of shelter-in-place and. Easter Sunday Mississippi is not a state. that uses government threats to shut. down churches I personally plan to. worship from home on Sunday with my. family we never missed Easter service. before and we won't miss the chance to. worship in our home. I hope all Mississippians will celebrate. responsibly and take precautions to stay. safe stay home if you can worship from.

home please use common sense. be smart look out for your loved ones. I want you to know today also that we. have taken some really impressive I want. to [ __ ] on tape cake did a pretty good. job this is just sign language guys I. got Kate Reeves hit with his car years. ago and he's like I'll give you a job. he's like stay home I know many of y'all. you know you want to go out want to get. baptized Easter by the way always kind.

of sucked as a holiday yeah Joey sucks. you know you get a nice honey baked ham. or my family we did it with vinegar. mustard glaze whatever you know you can. do some lamb maybe do a nice herb. crusted rack of lamb maybe a nice. Chateaubriand you don't do a casserole. on Easter you don't do pasta. Jesus Christ is coming back you [ __ ]. animal you do meat. you don't do fish to fish it's a roast.

you know two vegetarians you know do. vegans you do a roast of meat you kill. an animal or you buy an animal that's. already been killed and that's what you. do that's the Easter meal you do au. gratin potatoes if you can they are the. best Easter potatoes au gratin potatoes. represent the spring chocolate should be. only for the bunny you should do like. spring pastries pastry creams glazed.

fruit it's the return of lighter. desserts but still kind of heavy because. we're not quite in the summer so we're. not doing like sorbet and [ __ ] like that. you know that's if you're I mean you. know if you know can't really have an. event this year usually I try to give. advice for people that are trying to. have events that are trying to escape. the drudgery and weariness of their. horrific lives so I tell them what to. cook and what to drink but they can't do.

that this year they have to just live in. the horror that they've built for. themselves you know this quarantine. really makes you think it makes you. realize that the most important thing in. the world is to have a lot of money lots. and lots and lots of money. love is meaningless and your family and. your friends in many cases are obstacles. to truly what you can do you have to. throw those people away as quickly as. possible. push them in front of trains push them. out the window of a high-rise apartment.

building smother them with pillows in. your sleep they want you to fail they. don't want you to do better than they. did this means your parents and everyone. near you you have to get away from them. you should only keep friends for 24. months at that point you've gotten. everything you can from them and you. should throw them away act like you. don't know who they are push them in. front of a train out of a high-rise. apartment building smother them in their. sleep throw a hair dryer in the tub.

doesn't matter whether those are. metaphorical suggestions or real ones or. is up to you to decide you need to be a. stick and move hustler keep going keep. fighting don't get stuck in a bad. situation whether it's a job whether. it's a relationship or whether it's a. family unit nothing matters get away. from these people trust me they're. trying to kill you you just don't see it.

don't fall for hucksters like the Gary. V's of the world they tell you that. you're gonna start your business and. you're gonna be this brilliant. innovative person don't do that get a. simple job and steal get a simple job. and learn the way around it learn how to. steal stealing is so important steal. take take pad your pocket with the. extras find a way to circumvent the.

system little crimes are very important. when it comes to survival these are. things you're all gonna need to learn. how to do okay even if it's just. stealing ketchup one day its ketchup. next day and someone's pension be smart. play the long game if I could do it all. over again I wouldn't have gone near. comedy this circus tent freak show I. would have been in good shape I would. have stayed thin and I would have done. like you know what Matt Damon did. talented mr. Ripley I would have just.

stealing someone's identity murdered. them and tried to become them. that is also a great strategy for. success murder someone and become them. you don't hear that often you don't hear. that usually hear like go to grad school. that's not helping that's not helping if. you want big gains you have to take big. risks okay get comfortable with death. murder extortion blackmail violence. corruption betrayal these are all things.

that you'll need to get very comfortable. out to succeed in America. imagine a priest giving this Easter. sermon to people like wouldn't be great. if a priest just giving this sermon is. like a bunch of ladies with big hats. they're all nodding themselves in a big. southern Church is like the first thing. y'all need to do is understand that you. got apply pressure to the right people. understand that secrets are power and. leverage is necessary to get what you.

want know the Lisa yes praise Jesus. praise the Lord praise the Lord. what's a joke and what's not it's up to. you to decipher folks it's really not my. business I I just offer you what I can. offer you and I'm just telling you that. the Quarantine makes you think about. things how how truly blessed we are to. have this moment right before the world. descends into chaos and violence I mean. in five years the idea of something.

being true or not will be funny yeah the. idea of truth will only be laughable. because we will have gone we will have. descended by that point into a. collective state of madness truly the. future of this country is a permanent. state of schizophrenia brought on by the. media an endless assault of Technology. narcissistic personalities injecting. their opinions into everything you will. fall victim and prey to the monsters.

that are coming to eat whatever is left. of this decayed system you have no. choice right or wrong in terms of like. true or not true what's real news and. fake news if somebody even suggests that. you'll just start to laugh maniacally. like Joker. pretty soon we're heading there pretty. quickly there will be no value to truth. in the future there will be a collective. split of reality some people will live. in one some people will live in another.

a lot of people will have one foot in in. each world I mean it's gonna splinter. there will be no more one reality we're. heading into and I'm not trying to sound. like in LA. you know Looney tune we're heading to a. place where people don't really have an. interest in realities that don't confirm. to their thoughts ideas opinions beliefs. they want to live in their own reality. some people gonna live in their own. reality and your reality is gonna come. with your own media your own figures.

your own gods your own date ease your. own myths you know it's gonna come with. all of these things it's gonna be. prepackaged and sold to you and you're. no longer going to need any objectivity. because it won't exist your reality is. going to come fully fleshed out just. waiting for you to absorb it and become. it wholly totally completely there will. be no more compromise there will be no. more truth no more objectivity there.

will only be the [ __ ] darkness that. you'll live in for the rest of your days. until your physical body decides to quit. another fun thing on Easter is a quiche. like if you do a ham and cheese or. quiche Lorraine you could do one with. vegetables and or something like that. because they are that is kind of a fun. appetizer enjoy the holiday.