#180 - History Hyenas | The Tim Dillon Show

hi I'm Timmy the trashcan and I love. trash. they all taste so good instead of. throwing your trash on the floor won't. you please give it to me thank you for. considering your fellow patrons ya know. you can for some you see your patreon. you're doing good you know listen. there's no middle ground in New York you. either go big or it is what you know.

yeah yeah there is like are we. podcasting it we're on we're on right. now this Tim Billy Ghana's Papa. strictest Evernote egg - this is going. out yeah yeah so everybody behave you. think it's going this kid when your. producer what's his name ray will bad. when he opened the door most kissed him. right on the list yeah I mean this could. open the door and I said is this my. Grindr date I understand why Sal Vulcano. wants to get inside you yeah I mean it. was awkward Sal stop the episode was.

like this guy's a hottie you know I love. it sounds like he's I could get a boy I. get a model I said he's gonna do it's. gonna be an audio engineer yeah let's. make a right turn so we can release this. deal your first your last hotel room. that we just [ __ ] I said was 9/11 9/11. 9/11 in the Carlile now your hotel room. is 2001 2000 I don't know what that. means but I think you had something to. do with [ __ ] 9/11 very interesting. you're absolutely right about that it's. something there's something odd about.

that 9/11 and the 2001 that's [ __ ]. creep it's weird it's almost like the. government is following you and they. just decided we were gonna do a video on. Epstein's Island we just decided not to. yeah I thought about it I just thought. about I said you know what why poke the. bear no here's it really gonna nothing's. gonna happen to you you don't know. that's didn't know that the guys who the. Secret Service agents or whatever. [ __ ] NSA people are listening to your. podcast or whatever they love it. right so it's like it just not gonna do. anything I mean they enjoy when you say.

that yeah when you said I was sitting in. Long Island with a mound of coke and a. car saying we need to listen to Rush. Limbaugh saying we need to honor our. contract to the people of Iraq that will. go like this guy is. no we're sorry boss but it's cuz we're. protecting him yeah we need him this guy. yeah but we we were gonna do a video my. friend works in the Virgin Islands we're. gonna do a video we're gonna roll up to. FC's island and just hop off right and. do a little video in front of that. temple where god only knows what he was. doing in there this kids get married in.

five months yeah some other kid wants to. come and film I said I can't lead these. [ __ ] kids wait a second did you get a. call from his mom like like in the movie. almost famous oh you're the dawn like. just make sure my son is safe I don't. know what you're doing with your rock. star lifestyle but yeah can't bring my. son to Epstein's I mean yeah I know I. work I didn't but I just didn't wanna. like watch him get pushed off a cliff by. a groundskeeper on Epstein's Island and.

then have to [ __ ] go tell his fiancee. like I'm sorry he was great he was a. great editor yeah he really understood. what i was about comedic ly and here's. the other thing I don't want to believe. that the world is run by pedophiles but. let's be honest there's harder things to. prove harder things to disprove than. that yeah right you you would have a. real hard time proving that that wasn't. at least partially true yeah so about. something happens when you climb up the.

ladder of power yeah that just sort of. unlocks a very dark sexual loss. something's there that's copy level of. Mario Brothers well yeah and it's like. you get there and it's not a princess. it's just like a legal noodles what. excites you anymore right know what I. mean like you've done everything what. you've done it like I know for a fact. when John Travolta. first started to become famous or he was. just having sex with women and then he. had sex with all the women and then it.

started to be like only guys are gonna. excite me and I'm gonna be honest with. you Tim I'm getting close right I'm. getting close that level till you [ __ ]. a lot of [ __ ] I talking a lot of time. with slowed it down. well yeah chlamydia slowed it then right. Jesus intervened took the wheel it was. trippy but I feel good yeah so I have to. slow it down a choice but my point is is. that if you gave a guy like me I'm a. nice person. I vote and told by my peers I'm a nice. person I love you know my daughter I.

love God but if you gave me hundreds of. millions of dollars and gave me this. power it's a real problem I may start to. do things like Yanis was commenting on. how beautiful the horses we saw a horse. walking by because we're in fighting he. said don't you think now you can see how. easy it is for a person to get attracted. to a horse yeah and I said absolutely. not Chris because I see so much [ __ ] in. so much Latina asked and I'm like what. about the horse I'd like the horse right. right yes I'm looking at you read. without you keep [ __ ] tickling that. mustache it's gonna get ya did he know. your fiance yeah you're gonna get a load.

on your back that's why a OC is right. she's right now Mao Stalin AOC there all. right yeah nobody should put that much. money or power. yeah he'll see the Stalin in the corners. I'd knock him down a little bit we need. to take a little bit of the money yeah. we need to take a little bit of money. yeah you gotta [ __ ] kids in a hotel room. 2001 at the Manhattan clubs because this. carpets disgusting I think on that.

stairs starts screaming going what is. good to people come in and jerk off on. the carpet when I'm out yeah something's. going on this place smells like a hostel. yeah it's not not use a buck forty and. night yeah and uh that's crazy that. Midtown is that cheap it's cheap. downtown is where the big project is. well yes four managers are bringing. their harems yeah they used to be up. here now Chinese businessmen used to be. up here yeah no no they're downtown and. I'm up here podcasting is going on yeah.

yeah yeah confuse Norwegian Taurus yeah. right now yeah so like I'm here for a. bit I'm here for like a ten day thing. it's like you got you got to try to stay. under 200 we're gonna be here today so. stay with your family on Long Island you. just you don't want to deal with their. boomers and their [ __ ] out there. complaining about something I mean. they're complaining about inheriting. houses yeah. where my family's had yeah they're. inheriting homes and they can't handle. it because they got to renovate them yes. much of a project yeah you get over 30. you cannot stay with your family you can. barely stay with friends unless they're.

very wealthy right I'd have like a wing. of their house can you're over 30 the. sleepovers are done. I wake up with crippling anxiety like. we're all crazy right. wake up and somebody else is [ __ ]. home at 2:00 a.m. I'm like oh god yeah I. go to sleep at 3:00 a.m. just so I know. my first wake up with anxiety is during. the day yet so I can go right right to. bed yeah I can't wake up at 1:30 with. anxiety outs at the dark yes I go to bed. at 2:30 every night I wake up at like. 5:30 I'm like what the day's almost here.

today the Sun will save us and then I go. back to bed for another four hours. Christ can't be in somebody else's home. yeah no my family's at my house right. now for Christmas I mean and it's it's. it's a little like a honest I'm in rare. form because I've been off I've been off. women now for a month I've been celibate. on a month and already it's like the. anxiety I've been like I got a text. girls I got a text girls but I've just. bought Eckart Tolle but tell me called I. bring the power of now by Eckhart Tolle. beautiful and I'm being friendly with my. present but that also includes at times. like to get the anxiety out I can't have. sex with women so I went down to Shore.

Road in Bay Ridge and I yelled racial. slurs at the water family we'll just say. those racial slurs very calmly on their. couch this is very sweet and this is. what I love about boomers in Long Island. right one more time. boom a baby boomer okay they were but. they were born after World War two when. we needed to replenish the population. and people started pushing out people.

they believed and you know the suburban. home suburbs were invented so host. boomer when America went downhill was. after World War two even when you get. real estate everyone asks is this a. pre-war building because they made [ __ ]. good then right after World War two they. just threw up cardboard boxes to sell an. American dream. that doesn't exist right now and it's in. Long Island is like the paradise of of. that dream it's like a microcosm of what. it looks like all across the country. it's a disaster. it's strip malls it's Panera bread's. it's holding buzzers to get tables at.

dinner and Outback Steakhouse. it's all. there's nothing good about yeah and. that's by the way those are the positive. qualities the negative qualities are my. football coach [ __ ] me yeah I'm on. heroin right now I'm not like but your. mother's a boomer but she's a city kid. right she's born and raised Queens New. York different listen yeah true boomer. to me and this is this means nothing. it's just my own the weight my concept. of them in the mind is the suburbs so. true boomer like if you're in New York.

or Queens or Brooklyn or even like if. you're in LA to an extent even though. it's the suburbs or if you live in. Chicago yes you're still a boomer but to. me the real boomer experience is the. suburbs yeah your parents moved out of a. city. your grandparents probably grew up in a. city they got out they live in the. suburbs you stayed in the suburbs I were. raised in the shop by the way it was all. a mark the modern American Dream was all. a marketing ploy by the auto lobby right. and they capitalized on the white need.

to stay away from minorities right and. then sure and then their kids realized. oh no the minorities were all the. funnest right when you sit in an. Applebee's bar right and like you know. and journey comes on rye and why people. start swaying yeah you want to put a gun. in the club yeah where's q-tip DJ yeah I. applaud the Millennials who are moving. back yes just get rid of the walk Ness. right get rid of the walk is you can. walk for so long you starting to [ __ ]. hallucinate right time to take a nap.

take a nap go to sleep well we what's. interesting about women aren't women. yeah you understand. you hate to make a sacrifice Yeah right. do what you want to do right if you. think jerking off above this pull-out. couch when you're sleeping you got. another thing coming ray when you wake. up and your lips are a little whiz you.

on my show them Italians - Irish women.

or - yes. too much of anything is not a good it's. not good it's just a over low but the. Boomers really it's the 50s and 60s is.

when they were they had like my dad is a. tactical boomer yeah that was born in. 1952 yeah came up during the whole. hippie Woodstock was in a band and then. turned around and all the sudden he's. selling office equipment for Pitney. Bowes yeah by the way that's part of it. is what we that's what we need we sell. millenia because the millennial. generation is kind of like the boomer. generation the war is over it is a big. peacetime there's prosperity right they. got all these ideals there's like deal.

ISM they're holding signs no it's like. we need that generation you just realize. it's time yeah to get a job you can't do. as much the comedy and forever you have. to do something my dad didn't like his. job but that's okay he wasn't good at it. and he came home every day and he laid. on the couch to watch Sally Jessy. Raphael or whatever the hell was on TV. or just he did what he had to do to race. me he wasn't thrilled about it and my. mother was a Weeki Wachee mermaid in. florida you want to talk about real. serious jobs which she would swim around. in the tank and truckers would jerk off.

because the strip clubs weren't open yet. yeah it was yeah so this is how. seriously that yeah and that might be. Frank Sinatra yeah. your father if your father had another. kids in that generation whose father. might be Frank Sinatra off your horse oh. yeah no but it's like if your father has. enough energy like now all these fathers. have energy because they're not working. it's like our dad said couldn't because. they were [ __ ] exhausted we do and. share they couldn't play with me so I. had to learn myself I learned how to. play basketball do things like that. myself yeah you know well my father's. different could use a criminal but a lot.

of fathers he's still work job whatever. you collect all the pin numbers are and. yeah count numbers yeah to steal the. money cuz you tell the sons comedy money. is it cleaned out your mom's account -. absolutely clean kid likes to put a. little money on horses horses it's what. it's you know what can you do is what. happened to them like you know one. picture was my dad at Woodstock and it. was not quite at Woodstock but at one of.

those day and then the next picture was. he's like in an ill-fitting suit yeah. trying to knock over small businesses. and some copiers you know it's just. that's what it was a really a capsule HD. generation of boomers they grew up. listening to Bob Dylan right smoke and. weed trying to find the third eye. speaking about world peace and how Viet. Nam's are paradise right and then it. just kind of ended with them screaming. about ms-13 right there yes it's always. 13 whether we're being invaded by ms-13. it's a perpetual culture of victimhood. like they're the original victims yeah.

people don't understand how to. Millennials gap you know how the. Millennials become victims the boomers. are the original victims yeah they're. the people that got they inherited the. money they got the cheap loans to cheap. credit they got the GI Bill. well not that you hypo but they got to. run off of the GI Bill which was the big. inherited house Long Island Levittown. everything but they still disco cards. have been stacked against them somehow. yeah somehow someway my parents why. can't my father always says the same. three things in perpetuity cuz can't get. ahead yeah can't get ahead he's like the. rose trying to get yeah yeah he's think. I'm just trying to stay out of trouble. and I'm like you like who who's trying.

he shot again just trying to get who's. trying to get here need to go play piano. or [ __ ] restaurant who's trying to. get you high father will literally say. he will literally say no matter what you. say to him his response if you say to. him dad I killed a man. here's response will because you know. the older I get the more important I. realize it is to golf. nine holes if you have to just you go. she get to my age you regret it you were. gay he regrets not playing more golf yes. what is regret the suburbs is a mistake. that malls are a mistake it's an.

absolute horror show yeah it's it is a. wasteland it's a it's a real corporate. capitalist wasteland yeah by the way I. just want to say hello to all Tim's. friends who are listening you. [ __ ] cocaine on your [ __ ]. ties yeah listen to me. I know our last episode wasn't [ __ ]. funny yeah and I agree with everything. you say in your real people and I. appreciate it cuz you got real sense of. humor but this one's [ __ ] funny you. [ __ ] [ __ ] here the dynamic. changes are too [ __ ] arrogant. [ __ ] two three funny cases every.

episode can't be funny you need. something to listen you know while you. wait for your D we lawyer to show up in. a diner yeah okay you can't be chuckling. when your DV lawyer shows up to the. Westbury diner and says so this is. number three reading the local Syosset. eyes on your paper [ __ ] place man cuz. you were a little [ __ ] up and Lily. Flanagan you should have taken an over. but that [ __ ] piss you off and yeah.

[ __ ] it I'm in charge of my own destiny. I'm just gonna barrel down the Parkway. that's what it is yeah go get your. [ __ ] sushi at a restaurant this. podcast on it hit the elliptical at Life. Fitness yes once you get out there the. boomer mentality is so pervasive kids. are boomers like nineteen year olds. their favorite musicians Billy Joel. that's ridiculous wild but they don't. modernize yeah it's like when I start to. get into comedy right when I first start. to get a comment this when I start to. meet this new kind of person because. where I grew up in Ridgewood Queens. everybody's kind of like you know.

everybody's dad works everybody's dad's. in the Union so it's like my dad's. really worrying around so we're. listening to jay-z. right whatever we're supposed to be you. know even comedy it's like I used to. watch you know Jay Leno with my mom. whatever cuz I slept in the bed when I. was about 16 years old it's what it is. yeah but then it's like I start I. started to feel secure when I first. tried to get into Connolly 2009/2010 all. these kids like you don't know any. Beatles songs you don't you don't know. you don't you've never heard a Lenny. Bruce it's like yep my dad was a real. guy. you know my mom's a real person it's.

like yeah whew I don't know what you and. your [ __ ] homo dad's are played like. you listen to the Beatles and you're we. were rebellion to me culture was a way. to repel and a way to be like [ __ ] our. parents we want something that's our own. you know and the weird thing about Long. Island is it's a lot of kids that they. want to become their parents that's the. goal they don't want to do better than. their parents like we looked at our. parents we were like okay great but we. want to do something else I'm different. we're [ __ ] wrong we want to do. something else a lot of them we looked. at and we're like you know they're in a. you know maybe they were in a trap or.

maybe they're a job that didn't excite. us right look at my dad I'm like he. doesn't like what he does yeah doesn't. like what he does and then and you want. to do something else you wanna kind of. break that cycle and then not everyone. can obviously and you make a lot of. sacrifices too but that's the thing. that's where a lot of these those boomer. ideals and what I love about it and it's. just that Fox News kind of culture of. like we're being invaded. everybody's killing us ms-13 your door. ms-13 the door ready to kill you every. minute so you need you know Tucker.

Carlson to keep you safe Donald Trump's. gonna keep you safe from ms-13 yeah yeah. let's see honest if your dad is not. voting for Trump he's pushing the family. in the wrong direction like that I just. want to be on record saying that because. if he's believing in what the left can. do and I'm not I'm a more liberal person. but it's like you want to hope that your. dad like I'm in charge of my family so. the votes going to Trump because I'm. trying to push this thing I'm trying to. give my daughter a future and I know the. acasio Cortes of the world they'll take. it they'll ruin my daughter's life it's. a choice it's a bad choice it's a Brits.

a real bad joke well it's just we were. talking last night Tim it's like it's. the same play over and over and over. line it seems now it's Stalin it's this. it's Che Guevara it's it and you know. the thing about the the boomer. generation is when when you take a. course in college on counterculture and. the 60s and things like that American. boomers when they were teenagers. whatever they're they're they're the. heroes of this story they're the heroes. of the story and then there's this other. side on the other side of just these. white men who have crew cuts. who are on the other side holding guns.

at the kids holding flowers who were. androgynous all right and it's like. there's a good guy bad guy kind of. fetish fetishization yes of those two. sides that removes all nuance which is. we're kind of the liberal the modern. liberal arts kind of inculcation has. started. yeah it really started with the boomers. yeah saying these are the bad guys. we're the good guys she's a doom these. are the superheroes yeah but it's like. you know what those kids were Crewcuts. did bad things and those kids with long. hair who were endogenous Karen flair is. a bad thing yeah and now you know it's.

like my dad would say you know my dad. was in the Korean War and he would say. he would say you know I feel bad for. what happened my dad was because he. fought in a war no wars are good but you. know when my dad was old like the weeks. before his death I wanted I like it hit. me I was like you know what you were. kind of fighting for something good. right look at North Korea now it's right. good right there's something off about. the utopian notion of everyone being. equal because it's ill go look at nature. it's the opposite of nature's a little. bit if you want to survive and succeed. imitate nature nature needs to allow for.

something to [ __ ] survive I'm a. capitalist of a libertarian now the. hottest move to the suburb for two weeks. it now gets just walking around he's got. a fascist haircut now really sasshi ya. know he says it's removed nuance and it. started with the boomers and it started. with the counterculture there was a lot. of good losses then they don't look it. but they're fetishize yeah they're. fetishized they also got a look at like. what I think a lot of boomers did was.

they just took everything they didn't. think about what was good long term for. anything right everything was about take. it get it buy it consumerism short. mortgage crisis just give me I want more. bigger house bigger pool bigger they are. the most materialistic generation. they're not really religious or. spiritual they don't there's that you. know my grandfather's generation they. had war your father's generation had war. they had honor and valor even those. things that aren't great awards aren't. good but they had other things the. boomer generation is defined to me.

almost exclusively by materialism sure. things its houses cars wants needs but. more wants you know cruises a birthday. dinner don't you think actually went. from one extreme to the other yeah they. went from one extreme of like we're. against all that to like total indulging. and yeah the total indulgence is what. leaves you feel empty that's why. everybody in long as working around. trying to shoot up to feel anything. because you know you once you. the pool in a house in the car and. everything else it's empty and I wanted. erna tea leaves you feeling empty and. the boomers have just said well we're.

just gonna take another cruise we're. just gonna eat another lavish dinner. we're gonna you know we're gonna go to. another vacation we're gonna go see. Fleetwood Mac again we're gonna go just. it's just over and over again I mean I. remember this is a great boomer moment. my friend's girlfriend got arrested for. impersonating people she was cashing. fake checks she was on Indiana's Most. Wanted. okay yeah Isabel she's not a stripper we. gotta get her on the pot that woman yes. she just gota ten years or her fourth. you in Chicago ten years she's in jail. right now they don't [ __ ] around there. they go you're going in for ten she's.

got three kids they're black she's not. is what it is she's fun she's not a. racist. so she but she kind of is also so here's. the other thing she the cops show up at. the house my friend Ryan great kid. choose had answers the door big guy. bigger than you makes you look like a. little twink yeah absolutely heads at. the door - cops goes Isabel here he goes. no he goes let me explain you how this. works he's a state troopers they go we. have extradition or whatever they call. the treaty with like like not treaty but. you know we got to get her out of here. she you know Indiana State Police she's.

on the Most Wanted so the reality is we. have a warrant to search this property. to come in here and if we find her in. here you're an accessory now if you. don't tell us where she is right now so. I'm gonna ask you again. where is she then my friend Ryan looked. at the money what she's in the kitchen. so they walk in they take her out and. cuffs everything like that I'm having. dinner at his house that night his. girlfriend that he'd been seeing for two. years Indiana's most wanted just gonna. take it out Dave my friends Ryan's. parents who I love best people in the.

world are talking about buying a condo. in Naples was buying a condo in Naples. and would it be near the beach which. should be near to be and it's just like. these it was a generation of people. where was about them yeah it was about. so even the protesting which was about. was supposed to be was about other. people was itself that it's a little. more essentially all about that well I. would see it I see it in right now. Christmastime is coming up when my. grandfather was still alive who was in. his you know he died in his late 70s and.

this was in the late 90s but he would. always say because my mother is all. about what Christmas I mean the piles of. presents yes. stress are through the roof but any. temperature control just making a little. cooler little cooler yeah well my. grandpa would always say he would always. be like this isn't what Christmas is. about no with stop with the gift stop. with the gifts get him one thing get one. thing right I always kind of I always. thought about that like now me being a. father and I'm like you know I got my. daughter a couple of gifts we're like my. mother it's like you got to get your. daughter 35 gifts and it's like no.

because you're saying that consumerism. that capitalism she was born with that I. really kind of we can see a little bit. better now there's an emptiness to it I. think there's an emptiness you know. because you chant you're just chasing. and then you know you're just chasing. things without meaning and that here. comes the problem like my listen I love. my dad to death he's a good dude. but you know a lot of his life was. defined by the need to have money for. these things well it's a more I think. it's religion - it's the same yeah I. think it's like I said I think it's an. American dream that was marketed to them.

after the world war yeah that hey. there's this perfect life when really. the American Dream is the pursuit of of. an of happiness the pursuit if you have. an idea you start a company yeah that's. the real American dream being your own. boss starting something you're creative. right taking it as far as it can go. the American Dream is not the end result. you know hey picket fence car you know. and and market it it was more worried by. the auto lobby who who's really provided.

the blueprint for what America now looks. like coast to coast between the old. cities it's all marketing America where. the best marketers and were the best of. condition thinking thinking and it's. been happening from day one of our. country in we've talked about this on. the podcast even the idea of freedom. from the British Empire was just a. marketing ploy to get more troops the. people at the time didn't even want that. in the 1700 they were like no Britain. doesn't really beat the [ __ ] out of us. who they just we just want to be. represented in Parliament but George.

Washington and all those guys and. Jefferson were like you know the. marketing strategy here is independence. and be the free nation so we get more. soldiers to sign up but that's not. really what this isn't about yeah the. Nazis put all those choosing. concentration camps as just a marketing. tool to get everybody galvanized you. know. Marketing is there more to marketing. yeah I mean in addition thinking it. seems like shouting by the middle that. middle you know that middle-income. family is it's just being squeezed out I.

mean I see people are either elite or. you're struggling in my family and. during the during Thanksgiving or any. holiday that's all my family talks about. because we represent the middle is how. the poor get everything and the rich get. everything and the middle is just. getting [ __ ] the middle let's just. trim the middle does get [ __ ] but on. the flip side again just to just to. remember nuance which I think needs to. come back in our education system I. think the real failure is going on the. educational I think I think it's not. that bad of an idea right now and then. as if you're an 18 or 19 year old kid.

listening I think it's not that bad of. idea to leave college I don't know if. how much college helps you number one. nobody cares if you have a degree or not. and all it does is [ __ ] give you. those radical crazy like Old English in. China go through that in your career now. because you it nobody cares if you have. a bachelor's degree right they don't. care well what I was a getting job gonna. have a doctorate yeah yeah what I was. doing I'm still doing podcast with rain. is gay friend the the the middle class. the middle class does get [ __ ] the. middle class is disappearing yeah.

flipside you know I had this sort of I. had this sort of exchange as kind of. argument take that a if you will with. this liberal like journalist online and. she was saying this she was saying you. know what Yanis is Twitter is just. watching someone have a breakdown in. real time yeah yeah which is great he's. no more having a breakdown and he says. all the time he says he says I don't. want to put out podcast cuz I don't want. the heat on us and then you look at his. Twitter and it's like what the [ __ ] all. trace are you all you're doing is what.

are you doing he's fine fine it's 3:00. a.m. and I'm on the toilet I'm watching. Yanis and Seth Simon's fighting chiding. oh yeah I'm like what you suit so we got. a push back we got to hold the line boys. that's what we doubt hash tag Yanni long. days because I know when I see those. pleats I'm like I'm the one who's across. the front of it yeah happy you're in a. fight with a journalist no journalist. and she's saying all these things and. there's truth to that yes yes I mean. we become increasingly you know top. teller level or or for a lot of us but.

in America poor doesn't mean poor yeah. that's the other thing it's like she was. she she said we're becoming like like um. what's the dubai she says like Dubai I. go wait a second yeah we're not there's. no indentured servitude happening yeah. there's no South Asian being used by oil. money Arabs to [ __ ] build high-rises. right that's not happening the poor. people here are eating meat for a dollar. right I mean they all got homes they got. phones right people here have a phone.

they're the internet it's like so yeah. the middle class of money she's paying. for their welfare right yeah so that's. spoiled culture and a little bit of a. way because how much better do you want. it. compared to what like I wanna ask these. protesters compare there you go this is. my this country that's compared to what. Grace's country go out to it we are the. least racist country at this you yell. racial slurs in public at the soccer. game yeah you're a match the [ __ ].

they like to they like to [ __ ]. lecture us and then you watch a soccer. game and there's just a whole section. doing a Nazi salute right. there's no that's the Conservative Party. nobody would do that throw bananas on. the [ __ ] field there it is a little. worse there it is a little worse there. but I do think that people are. frustrated with with with how much rich. people have gotten away with I think. that's fair I think it's fair to be. frustrated by how much rich people have. gotten away with ok communist Martin on.

next week these guys are out of control. that's the you're gonna have to bring a. be on to [ __ ] what capitalism isn't. fair that way but I mean what do you. want do you want it to go back to. socialism is it's not capitalism it's. not what we're living in is not. capitalism it's institutionalized. criminality we're have to set in. Congress are blackmailed by [ __ ] guys. on islands photographing them have sex. with kids and then they have to go vote. for whatever the [ __ ] big business wants. it's not capitalism it's gangsters. international gangsters this is not. capitalism these buildings are owned by.

a Russian oligarchs in Chinese amusement. park like well that are taking all this. has nothing to do with Adam Smith. capitalism this is. everything to do with crime cabal's of. criminals enriching themselves who are. not doing anything democratically none. of this shit's being voted on it's all. being [ __ ] shoved down people's. throats nobody votes on this year why do. you think the biggest proponents of. immigration are on the right they're on. the right it's into Koch brothers it's a. Chamber of Commerce all these big. business guys want to pay these people a.

dollar so that they don't have to hire. black people and they don't have to hire. people that are low-income in America so. what you see is I you know these. immigration raids are cruel and they. suck and I don't like what Isis doing. but what happens is when you have these. immigration rates African unemployment. african-american unemployment drops. people that are poor in that area then. go work in these factories that we're. all so I think there's a it I I don't. want communism I don't want any type of. collectivism but we do have to rot like. the Donald Trump's the result of the.

system that's been rotted out. that people have no faith in anymore and. they're not wrong to not have any faith. in it they're not wrong to not have any. faith in the system. with the President of the United States. can fly to a pedophile island 26 times. and then the guy whose island it is gets. killed in jail instead of being held. accountable and none of his accomplices. were ever held accountable so they're. not wrong to lose faith in that type of. system you know but I don't but do you. really believe that that will change or. can change I don't know but I I think.

the frustration is natural and. understandable the idea that you have a. system that is completely for one group. of people that rich people can buy their. way out of prison they can buy their. kids way out of getting caught with. drugs I mean up until recently if you. were smoking a joint on 125th Street you. were going to jail for three years and. you're gonna have a felony conviction. and you know that's because potentially. in the private prisons is gonna say the. private prison that they're trying to. get you placed at a low cost that's make. tonight realities you have all this. slave labor that's what is that earn.

daddys modern-day slavery Cortez is. annoying she doesn't have any power I. think you gotta get off Twitter and you. realize that people I could cost you. Cortes they don't have any [ __ ] power. although no one got their well with who. Jimmy Fallon the reality is the guys. that have power are still the people. that want to sell water and air to you. that's the progress Mike. question do you really think it's what's. your evidence beyond like beyond theory. yeah beyond theorize yeah what's your.

evidence that this is widespread in the. norm what's what do you like Epstein and. what was going on with you know it is is. a particular story about Epstein well. let's say it wit me Norman watch you're. not everyone is touching kids no no one. search almost all of them are touching. kids. yeah but not everyone say Kevin studies. I'm saying that when you look at the. ability of wealthy people to evade. justice that's that that's the oldest. story in the book job of this authority. if it was your kid it's not a good story.

it's not a good story my kid and I'm. Richard he gets off it's a very good. story you know what I'm saying here the. reality is if it's someone that you know. if it's a kid that's being abused by. somebody who's able to do it with. impunity it's it's it's a very big. problem it's also a very big problem if. if people are blackmailing politicians. like you all these debates we're having. and supposedly this good good-faith. debates about a system that people go in. there and say hey I think it should be. this another guys I think it should be.

this let's mean the middle it's. compromise let's make laws if you go in. there and you're [ __ ] owned and. blackmailed and you you're just not even. representing the people in your district. anymore you're doing whatever the. [ __ ] corporation or whoever says you. should do because they have power on you. and it doesn't have to be sexual. blackmail it could be financial. blackmail with anything but Timmy okay. and I raised a perfect example yeah okay. because they they lean on all these. politicians right they're a powerful. lobby yeah and a younger me would go you. know what NRA is evil enter raise they.

look and then you go to these places you. go to these places these districts that. we're speaking of and the people right. that's what they want right that's the. way they vote they don't live in a city. where everyone's living on top of each. other they watch Fox News and they're. paranoid about ms-13 Ryan T Indiana. democracy so I'm sure the are they more. are they are they brainwashed are they. marketed to meaning so who wants the. carried interest loophole on Wall Street. who wants that who voted for that who. voted for the idea that.

people could come into New York City. with shell corpse and just buy ten. apartments with blood money because they. poisoned a river in zambia and. essentially can be freedom baby cominjee. freedom bought it but it's not it's not. your name right no you're not you know. creative creative it you create a crime. bro that's crime that's why you have a. Donald respect it's why you have you. gotta start doing more I know the less.

annoying I hate the left is my as much. as anybody but it it comes from. somewhere this all comes with Donald. Trump this comes from someone by the way. Donald Trump comes from the left yeah. he's traditionally his whole life until. recently it was answer and he even he. even knew that the economy works better. with a little with a little regulations. as it balances things out that's it but. it the whole thing is if you get cancer.

and you have to declare bankruptcy and. and that becomes a problem people give. people if you're if you're rationing. your insulin but let's so that you can. live yeah while you know people the. Kardashians are worth a hundred billion. dollars and their main export is lip. gloss Tyson on and when he just told us. if Jeff Bezos was able to lay all his. money in dollar bills in a line he would. have enough money to get from the earth. to moon and back sixteen times.

wrap it around earth two hundred times. and then the with the money left over be. able to like go to Australia some could. line up all his money on the floor a. large percentage event we're gonna pay. off women I understand we're saying so. then that can happen there and yeah I. don't even know anything about Jeff. Bezos how he uses a human being but if. that's the case then yeah there. shouldn't be people having a rat's ass. and this is where we all come back. together because at the end of the day a. lot of these things aren't political the. salute the problems are very deep and.

the solutions will be maybe yeah they've. kind of come from technology or science. or whatever a lot of these problems are. like the system is kind of broken. Facebook I think is worth how many. billions of dollars been you can look. that up it's it trillions beans at all. they employ like forty thousand people. you know. GM at its height employed millions of. millions of billions of people these. companies that are now generating as. much more wealth are now all there why. would you believe how many people they. employ well they employ it because it's. although everything's being made. overseas doesn't have its of course but.

I think my future is scary for the. American worker if you're a worker right. now the futures need are scary that's. why that's wanting people to employ. thirty five thousand five hundred. billion thirty five thousand people. that's why when you watch when you watch. these Democratic debates you'll stand a. guy like Andrew yang say we need a. national income right that's what we. need we need a national income the. glaciers are melting there's gonna be no. more jobs and nobody the crowd doesn't. even clap cuz that's boring because it's. true but then you'll have another person. say well I want to clean the White House. because Trump's a pig and they get an.

applause break right you're doing it to. yourself yeah want to choose a side. either the people are the problem it's. like people or the people problem. because nobody wants to live in the gray. area and the gray areas where most. people live I'm a it's like yes I want. free health care for everyone because I. believe in your in just yeah but you. know what else I want the [ __ ] wall. because I get the wall does that will. win ya wall and health care wins yeah. immigration policy and health care win. I'm not saying I want I don't know they.

just want immigrants to come in this is. beautiful more the country yeah but they. need to be vetted you know what I mean. well listen Donald Trump is right if you. want your health care which we should. have I'm for single-payer health care. you know you got it you got a look at. you got to look in the world. we're the ones fighting evil is that. Netherlands time for you send more than. just a food truck when we go yeah you. know it's you're like all the countries. yeah that have health care they're able. to have health care because we go fight. their Wars and they send [ __ ] food. truck we're fighting we need oil is why.

we need oil we need to be making a lot. of money yeah so I agree with you 100%. the issue now is you really can't it's. hard to de-escalate from where we are my. point it's hard to guess cliff why would. you want to de-escalate baby we're wrong. just enjoy your Roman citizens enjoy the. end look at what's really happening it's. the end if yeah there's no solution. right what we're doing here is just. killing time to make money off doing. nothing that's why that's just. no jobs left we're just smart enough and. [ __ ] criminal enough right to [ __ ].

steal money from these people on patreon. this is not a real job right we're just. charismatic and we're winning none of. this is productive it's over right house. rains and that's the way it should be. CEO strongest [ __ ] to survive in the. week should diet disease shuttle is oh. the only thing stronger than all I don't. believe on this podcast I'm just trying. to make it entertaining cuz Tim's friend. said the last one was too [ __ ] hairy. yeah my friend socks he he went to that. restaurant Don and Jeannie was like oh. it was okay. who goes him and did some Vietnamese.

fishwife he's dating they go to Don ng. and they [ __ ] Ted then they go offer. to bring me leftovers I'm like you gonna. bring me a cake you don't know anything. that restaurants [ __ ] great you big. nose [ __ ] he's got a big nose you know. GBD I think we should do it CB I think. we should make weed illegal put them all. back in jail what I think all these. [ __ ] tak [ __ ] bros running around. la trying to figure out a way to deliver. you weed on a [ __ ] scooter they shall. go right back to Rikers him you know.

it's over I don't over I know it's how. would it can't go quicker now things. can't change their heart yeah we are an. object falling to the ground picking up. speed the closer we you know here's the. fish over I didn't know the end would be. this hilarious it's great that's what no. one thought yeah no one thought the end. would be like a Family Guy episode. nobody imagined the end would be Donald. try game show host and and a classic. quick test was a bartender yeah six.

months ago somebody gave her a book on. Marxism and now she's like yeah. political Savior of the country yeah. nobody knew how kind of hilarious this. would be Socrates did yeah you go back. to the Republican say democracy the. longer it goes on. yep the the the the older people start. to pander to the younger people that. have to act like when everything's okay. number one he said in the book. everything was okay look at it now all. Kasich Oh Chaz knows better than some. seven-year-old he says look at old.

people like they're pathetic their life. experiences cynicism right no that's. called wisdom. you young [ __ ] you write the vessel of a. human here's what Socrates said he said. here's the example and here's how you. know it's gonna be over I said what. you're gonna start to see him s13 is. gonna be everywhere Muslims everywhere. yeah what he said no he said he said two. things he said when one everything is. okay like Jana said cuz he's don't. forget at the height of ancient Rome. right start to crumble and I'm all for. it - yeah I love everybody but it's like. you could do whatever you want orgies in.

the streets homosexuality everywhere. there were no rules anymore you couldn't. say anything nobody cared right so. that's one woman was a man a man was a. woman whatever you want to say that was. her own was as liberal as modern-day. West Village right now that's the truth. yeah and then what also he said he said. that you're gonna start to see once. democracy that the fundamental problem. with democracy is not everyone's. supposed to be voted he said you should. go to school to vote you should get it. you should you should go only specific. parts of the democracy should be elected. to the top to even vote the minute you.

give everybody the right to vote what's. gonna happen is this since what's. happening now is you're gonna have a. candy shop owner and a doctor and the. doctors gonna say candy is bad for you. so you know Candy's bad for you but I'm. telling you live longer if you vote for. me they're gonna say [ __ ] you and the. candy shop owner is gonna say I'll give. you all the candy you want just vote for. me and the candy shop owner will get. elected yeah that's what's happening is. the candy shop owner I called Plato's. getting elected because he was saying. you need to go to school like your major. in college should be voting and then we. can at least have a better idea of. trusting but this overall idea that.

everybody's got the same vote it's. stupid and he said it's it's why he. didn't believe in democracy. you know Greece they abandoned democracy. for a long time if they invented it but. they didn't use it for a thousand years. well we're not even really a democracy. we're not a democracy. the my personal belief first of all I. just want all Ulysses to know I'm a. liberal kid it's just by the way yeah. the idea that anyone believes that at. this point is the funniest thing oh by. the way that's of me sitting in a chair. and be like I just want anybody to know. I'm a vegetarian every photo every photo.

and video depiction of me has been. insane. every song of me eating a rib I too am. at Smith of olinsky's is a lie I'm a. vegetable kid and you can see my ribs. yeah here's a I'm also a liberal here by. the way if you don't know it's a network. on television your house you put your.

blazer on conservative kids are more. open-minded the liberal kids yeah well. the liberal kids are also boring. yeah that's an open-minded you know the. head open-minded now and they're boring. and the problem is if fanatics look. malnourished something into their skulls. yeah they're all have roommates it's. like that's not what I want I want serve. the kids with the money who are doing. things on their own right so uh Plato's. Republic. you know Plato was advocating for a. class of people called philosopher kings. this is common you know one-on-one.

philosophy [ __ ] but yeah it's kind of. true when you think about it like I I. think the a bicameral or tri cameral. representative body is a good idea so. right government by the people so every. district every whatever has their. representative that that interacts with. these philosopher kings or this judicial. branch to point on how you do it but the. president that branch the executive. branch that he's elected you know with. all this money like you're talking about. cuz obviously that's the problem is the. money that's the part where you're going.

like maybe Plato was right maybe that. guy needed to be a philosopher king. somebody who who is trained or watched. by a body like a Yoda or something to be. that he's in for four to six years but. he's not just some [ __ ] game show. host that has charisma. maybe that guy needs to be tested for. his morality for that exactly can't. enforce any type of term limits like. like you should not we do we've to. enforce them well but not on the. legislative branch we don't afford yeah. so you should not be a senator what do.

you think about the judicial branch. should they have term limits because. that's a little weird that gets. political so I understand why they don't. right I understand why they don't. because you don't want a judge to be. politicized politicized they're voted in. they're all for their political views. yeah but I just think it's weird that. there are people whose entire career. senator or I'm a congressman I think you. should have to go out and function in. the world this should it be your entire. career yeah because you should be able. to do it for a certain span of time six. eight years or whatever it is and then. get out of there because otherwise these. power factions develop just corruption.

forever make it a lot harder what if. someone's really good at it well then. there should be maybe a special. exception where they'd have a referendum. and they say we want to keep it who's. really good at it I mean we can figure. out how to get to that we could figure. out against Mars I mean is we should be. able to figure out a good a better an. addenda like to make our governing. system we gotta got to recycle more. people in there we can't have people in. there forever but the thing is with. America because people always want to. want to compare America to New Zealand. say Oh New Zealand change the gun was.

like that because they have five million. people oh yeah how many people and so. many yeah can't do it so this is a. Eurasian yeah no serious person I think. expects America default you mean the. country of my uncle made a good point. the country's become somewhat uncover. noble because it you know now you had it. show there's so many people there's 300. million people I think so we culture so. many cultures so many people how does.

the 350 a fish stick can you Ben's. parents comedies going great by the way. yeah yo Ben's actually doing [ __ ]. great means making money with his socks. on yeah 327 Ben's doing great this is. the future better it's doing great yeah. and you've teamed that just Gordon right. now you're with the hottest [ __ ]. commodity this got Joe Rogan on [ __ ].

speed he's gonna be nominated who's. gonna be there he's gonna quote the. presidential debate he did there there's. a whole big petition for right now do it. wants to do it because if should we hunt. with bows or guns shouldn't be a. question yeah here's what here's what it. would be I think would be years I think. they would have to give him a leeway to. do with the way he wants to do it right. which is not do these little one to two. minutes sound you should also limit the. pictures of elk and holla.

a nose won't eat me for what if I can. get on his part the way to do the love. you Joe Rogan but it's a credit. assignment what he puts on Instagram. that's the way to go I'm the biggest. [ __ ] in this [ __ ] room. [ __ ] you know what it's the same [ __ ]. photo it looks delicious but it's the. same [ __ ] phone a lot he loves it and. he'd ski you know listen he hunts it he. eats it he cooks it is healthy I mean. this is nothing but love and respect for.

Joe Rogan yeah I think that he's great. you'd be a great interviewer if they. allowed him to do it the way he wants to. do it I would you know it would be it's. the only way to really get the masses of. young voters which is what they want to. watch right nobody's gonna watch it when. they have it's too boring for the kids I. think Joe Rogan gonna do it I think Joe. Rogan would agree that it's scary that a. comedian a great comedian who interviews. anyone there's a lot of people turning.

to him to listen to do the interview. series that were a problem right now is. is is how [ __ ] low the journalism. industry has steeped right we got these. journalism journalists with their own. Twitter accounts twitting tweeting out. digs it's like I just saw this [ __ ]. woman from Politico doing a big story on. Giuliani keep it about Giuliani she. tweets about the Giuliani's 20 year old. assistant who did get up by the way. who's hot taking a picture with the. president it's like you don't have any.

respect for that that 20 year olds. family crime she's the assistant. how is she part of the story right she. part of your story I have no it's not. I've never so back for journalists. because they don't exist I mean there's. a ton of them in the country look at. what we do on the history I mean Yanis. will write quotes from the new special. why not is not the best [ __ ] BOK. around the world. if Jenni's Plate special is the bet I. love hilarious but that special I didn't. even know if it was stand-up right just. being honest right now I don't know what.

the [ __ ] it was people writing about. anything all that out. leaving the rock example we know what a. piss off slang yeah just can we edit. that out I mean she's very very naughty. yeah it's a world where yeah they're. telling me that what was it 20 minutes. and then another 40 minutes of. interviews with her family. yeah I mean and then you tell me it's. great it's like I'm confused by it yeah. dick she's very very vocally people that. are writing about the people that are. writing about comedy are they really. prefer comedians and well let it out. here's the thing there's nothing gets.

edited out you gotta edit that out. Jenny Slade's putting you in her [ __ ]. Amazon what do you mean - if you're. behind she hates me just she wants you. delivering pizzas. I think she's funny let me tell you what. she wants you let me tell you what would. happen if you were to party in the hills. and her and John Mulaney yeah she would. walk up to you and hand you a glass of. wine and keep walking. so let's get that [ __ ] straight right. away. the other thing is this the people. writing about comedy right now are. already better from a perspective of.

what comedians either would have dated. be in high school or wouldn't have. thrown me in a locker right that's what. it is right there's no there's no. healthy human being writing about comedy. I don't care who we are right it's just. that Jason cinnamon at the Times wishes. he was reviewing theater his mom was a. bigwig in theater and was great right. Joyce in a manner for whatever she had a. whole theatre company he's reviewing. comedy with your base theater right. cloud Matt right who's a sweet girl but. crazy I've offered to have her come on. the podcast she won't come on the.

podcast cuz she gets scared - I guess. leave her apartment yeah okay. and Seth Simon's is like the. personification of ringworm yeah not. even real there's other marlo stearns. right gqu they're not real to try to. make GQ woke yes Jane Mayer. Seymour hurt there's a few [ __ ] real. people that are actual tres leches Chris. Hedges that went to a war and he said. you know is you know Chris Hedges this. isn't every moment of joy has been.

drained from his body which is what a. real journalist should be yeah um yeah. you're absolutely 100% stone-cold. correct I just want to do it all over. again I went to the New York I'm saying. is if you're writing about the comedy. scene you're basically in the open mic. scene of journalism yeah. you're not even open mind whatever it is. I went to the Nutcracker the other day. and I saw all these little families in. suits at all live in places like. Scarsdale yep and Bronxville and the. east side and the west side and I said I.

just want to do it all over again where. my family just really pushed me to just. get into a better real real good college. I've just been would have been an elite. guy that's just I just want to have a. slate gray suit and I just want to just. have a nice you know little little. brownstone and that that's my fantasy. life is to just do it all over again. like this is what I would tell you cuz. you're great dad. steer the ship as much as you can. because the boomers didn't steer the. ship there were like just go to college.

doesn't matter what college figure it. out. it'll be great enjoy it we got a good. Community College you'll go that you'll. do it they didn't steer the ship steer. the ship steer it when she starts to get. like 9 10 you really start steering that. ship and by the time kids are [ __ ]. right now by the time they're like 17. right because nobody put the work in. from the jump to get them where they. could be or say brinson saying be a. tiger mom you got to be that why are the. Asians you wouldn't have a podcast.

producer if there was Tiger moms that's. true mr. and said go dude go live your. dream he moved in LA no he's sitting on. listen couch there's always making like. there's always gonna be enough runoff in. the world do you understand for people. like me there's always gonna be enough. damage people like me yeah and people. like him that will find each other in it. the house of pies in LA which is where. the gay kids like me and Chris will find. each other 100% but for everybody else. for those traditional people make sure. your [ __ ] kids are on a track in high.

sounds like social engineering knowing a. little strike against you gotta. engineered them from the familial point. what team are you on are you on the left. or right I'm on the career yeah I'm on. the team of I just love you why are you. Randy against these [ __ ] tease you. know these Asians and Russian guys. hiding their money from communists holy. what happens is they want to avoid taxes. cuz that's where you have Acacio Cortez. this is. you have these extremes right is because. the [ __ ] the center has clap I agree.

with you and that's the problem I so you. can't it's all action and reaction so if. you just please for one second so nobody. gets the wrong idea yeah can you please. just tell me what you said the other. night last night cuz it was beautifully. beautifully beautifully described yeah. and crafted in X but with the trans. thing with the trans thing let me test. with this nobody's right about anything. at 3:00 a.m. on Twitter yeah yeah yeah. but the captures it and just like you.

know as much as a Castro Cortez you know. it looks like shades white people it's. what she [ __ ] as much as Yanis tweets. about it's what he jerks off to its. transpose this is what it is supported. Transpo I know I love trans people. though that you're attracted to them I'm. attracted to them if they're hot if you. look like a girl what the real thing I. wasn't about it I keep telling his wife. I'm like you're the perfect girl from. you just need a dip my sexual tastes are.

much like the Turkish Sultan's right I'm. a Turkish sultan yeah I like to yeah. your name is on the orientation is women. but if it looked if it looks like a guy. if it looks like a girl I'm fooled right. fool me and credit to you well here's. what I was saying about the trance I was. saying that there's there's it's not. even trans people it's not day-to-day. trans people you meet it's not gay. people to care about redefining society. in this way however what it really is is. there's you know radical groups of. people that want power and they want to. redefine all of society and they look.

for a way to do it then look for an. entrance point right they're like how. can we how can we start this process how. do we get in so they pick issues like. the trans issue because they can't just. come out and say give me all your money. you can't come out and say give me all. your money and by the way we don't think. you should have any speech rights we. don't think you should be able to talk. about anything so what they do is they. come in to an issue that most people can. understand and say yeah well we want to. be kind we don't want to be cruel we. want to be welcoming and accepting to. people so what they do is they allow. this transition to become their main. issue and then they try to move the ball. down the field far enough show that they.

really limit the scope of what you can. discuss and talk about in that one and. then by the way doesn't stop there. ends with we want 80% of your income and. you're not allowed to say anything right. and that's an old story and that's an. old story you see it you see it in. Venezuela because you've seen it with. Che Guevara all your money and you don't. have a family and there's no bulwark. against the state right we'd come in and. we run everything we engineer you we. want to control you that is it's the. same way on the other side with the far.

right they want to put choosing camps. right they want it they wanna they want. gay people trans people to be Marg Allah. because they want to enforce medieval. Christianity as a tool of societal. control that's what it is it's just a. bunch of people that want control and I. just need a pool in the Hollywood Hills. right that's all I want I just want a. vantage point to watch it burn no but I. think it's I think it's very important. for for people yeah we listen to this or. anywhere and this is why I go crazy. through the morning to hold the line of.

reality because that is the center the. center is going hey I support trans. people trans people is a beautiful. modern thing but let's not let's not. let's not throw caution to [ __ ]. reality I mean it's it's a it's a. consequence of modernity I mean they. take blockers they take estrogen or. testosterone and that's great and they. identify because they're the brain is is. that way that orientation in their brain. is that way and they identify that way. and they want to take that to fruition. but you know they are trans women. they're not women because if they're not.

if they're women what are women so. because logically if you're saying trans. women or women then that means all women. are trans yeah and they're not so it's. like if you're insinuating that that. trans women aren't trans women then. you're almost implying something's wrong. with being a trend which is which. there's trying to get rid of Trance so. what they're trying to do yeah is just. trying to get rid of the step between. they want you to separate sex and gender. yeah that's what that's what I think. where the confusion comes in they want. you to say your biological sex is. different than what your gender is.

that's what they're trying to also want. to say that they also want to say this. but your gender you can choose but. you're said they want to say this the. gender itself entirely is it construct. in a result of a suicide that's not true. you can't right that's. well your intention no is not true and. they don't kicks partnerpartner' truth. what it acts are like ninety [ __ ] right. we are done with fares nobody in the.

Trump rally gives a [ __ ] about facts. they go keep building the wall there's. not one brick of the wall they don't. care right facts mean nothing to them he. went and he said I'm gonna clean up Wall. Street we're gonna eliminate the carried. interest loophole we're gonna [ __ ]. reign those guys and he didn't do any of. that by the way we're worth you know. what he did this crisis will be another. cry I mean we've done nothing to. insulate ourselves from the next. financial crash and what I'm about to. say I want your opinion on what Trump. did fix LaGuardia Airport I just want to. say that there's an artichoke eats in. there and it's a one wing of the Airport. policy cops yeah but it's one part is.

nice a lot of mean I find a Jeff cat. under LaGuardia LaGuardia can't handle. the planes I use music Robin find a JFK. yeah so here's my question. it's obvious to everybody at this point. who has any sense that the conversation. has been hijacked yeah by the extreme. right and the extreme left sensible. people know that that's bad yes I think. the majority is still sense as sensible. so but the the conversation has been. hijacked by these two minorities of. fanatics now when you look back at.

history you look back at World War one. you look back at World War two you see. at the outset of World War one radio was. invented so there was this great tool to. now galvanize and propagate to the. masses that that mobilized and was used. as an apparatus to accelerate a world. war then you see TV was invented around. world war two you see the same thing. happened with TV where the Germans used. it especially and so did the Americans.

as a tool to mobilize etc same thing as. what I said before now we have the. Internet the third great invention for. communication the same thing seems to be. happening where it is being used to. galvanize these extreme points of view. the inevitable being another world war. your thoughts sir yeah well I think when. you look at who that war is gonna be.

with I think. are gonna happen because of what I'm. saying. inevitable you of it based on those two. examples but I think the mutually. assured destruction of the nukes keeps. us from that I think not even close well. it was a borrowed [ __ ] from The. Breakfast Club I'm not even close bud I. would say this people are [ __ ] stupid. I would say this everybody has prepend. of guns preparing for war with China I. mean we have been for a long time there. gonna be a proxy war cuz the Chinese are.

putting these Muslim poor Muslim kids in. [ __ ] concentration camps right now. there's a whole indigenous group these. Chinese are so [ __ ] godless yeah I. don't mean that in a bad way right I'm. getting carried away here I don't mean. everyone yeah maybe this you got it out. but no because I'm agnostic but I'm just. saying like something very nefarious is. happening over there where there is this. sort of you see the beginnings of like. these concentration camps happening yeah. and it's happening yeah and this is.

something we saw happen in the 40s and. it's like the internet is just swelling. everyone it's bringing out the lowest. common denominator of people yeah listen. my father who has I'm not lying I think. he got through ninth grade my dad you. know was doing you know really didn't. set himself up at all not the brightest. guy in the world but he's had some hot. days at the horse tracks that some hot. days on track and my mother was [ __ ]. hot when she was young and he scooped. her up she was a friend but what he said. I'll never forget this 2009 I started. comedy whatever Twitter comes out we're.

talking and my dad goes you see this new. thing there's Twitter thing he's like do. you have one and I was like no I gotta. get one though you know all comedians. happen he goes it's gonna be a big. mistake for the people in the country. and I was like why is that cuz not. everyone's supposed to be heard from. yeah everybody's supposed to have a. voice she does think about think about. how much [ __ ] happens if you know if you. get up in front of a crowded cafeteria. but he's talking nobody's listening he. said so this is gonna be the biggest. problem our country ever had as his. Twitter [ __ ] and he's kind of not. long-run absolutely rancid guy who's as. a 9th grade education yeah I had a. mentor in college professor Smith one of.

the most wisest people I've ever had at. American the American University where I. was educated my alma mater which is. Latin for all the guys eaten kids on. Epstein's Islands no it was now but. the one thing he'd say I'll never forget. he says he says comfort corrupts yeah. that's what it is yeah it's inevitable. doesn't matter what your moral were. brought up you have to constantly guard. yourself against the corruption of. comforts and people just don't have the. energy of the willpower to consistently. check in on that so what I'm basically.

saying is we were designed to fail hmm. we're at the end we've climbed up the. mountain but we are Sisyphus the rock. will fall on us we've made it to the end. we're not going to another solar system. we're not going to another [ __ ]. habitable planet in the habitable. planets are 300 million light years away. we're sucking all the resources out of. the earth and it's gonna shuffle things. around in a way that that's gonna hurt. us because nature does not like. imbalance and that's just written it's. fate we're going to go away you know.

locker roaches and rats are what evolved. now I feel like someone there's an. island bar some island paradise we don't. know exists and somebody's saying that. exact thing and Geoffrey app sees you. sitting there with a glass of rum going. life will find a way show me a body. right who knows there's another I'm sure. there's you know that's the other thing. we'll just never know yeah that's you. think that's what conspiracies are. ultimately frustrating and they just. don't lead anywhere cuz you're never.

gonna know unless you're on the inside. right people don't know anything about. comedy I always explains to ban him like. nobody knows with the green room of the. store is Lyle of the cellar and by the. way we all know what it's like and we're. all like huh why would you want to know. but here's the thing because to them. it's magic. to them it's Magic's not it's not of. course everyone sitting in silo we know. yeah but we know yeah now there's two. ways to experience anything from the. outside of the inside both have their. benefits being on the inside you know.

what it really is being on the outside. you have your idea of what it really is. being on the inside you have no more. illusions about what it is on the. outside you have all illusions about. what it is they both have their benefits. it's it when you when you look at this. stuff so much of there's so many of the. decisions that are being made in our. world being made at third. thousand feet we just don't know what's. going on we can't we can make jokes we. can read books we can have ideas but we. don't really know the thought process or. what goes into this and our own little.

corner of the world which is which is. entertainment you know most people look. at the entertainment business and for. you know for whatever reason they think. you have an idea of how it works and. they just all and you could see an. entertainment especially in New York or. LA but you know I can comment on New. York I live here even the things that. are massive you know a year ago me too. massive movement I was at Yanis is by. the way massive movement on the island. of Manhattan you go to Long Island you. go on me to wine oh that sounds just. gonna say when I was at when I was at.

Jana sue she rushed right when I when I. was at Yanis is engagement party I was. talking to one of one of his wife's. lovely friends trying to have sex with. her right and she's a lot of Republicans. a Long Island schoolteacher and I said. something I said I was talking about all. my favorite comedian is Louie and I was. like wow you don't see a lot of women. saying that these days because of the me. to stuff she's like what's that and I. said what do you mean what said that she. started asking her friends and she goes. what's the meet to what did Louis do and. this was months months after yeah you. know whatever and you're like what and. it's like yeah because most people don't.

care even Louis himself I heard him. speaking even though he himself had said. you know the beginning of last year he. would be on the train and people would. be talking about you know commenting oh. you [ __ ] pig your rapist will [ __ ]. that's that's crazy it's not accused of. any of that right but now because of all. how things go in cycles or whatever it. now people like he'll be on the train. and he said people be like oh you know. what happened he was unfortunate I can't. believe society treats you this way I'm. coming your show and he's bad he's gonna. be back selling tickets again because. it's all just ease of movement he's.

closing what do you think cuz there's an. engine question about Louie how do you. think he you know he's on a theater tour. now well no he's doing the date and. funnybone okay so he's not doing. theaters not yet but he can do them it's. just it's just he's gotta wait til some. of this sting comes out of you know the. theaters not wanting to be seen booking. him he could sell he could sell it. Madison Square Garden right now but. absolutely people need to grow up we. need to become adults again yeah we're. living in this period of extended youth. yeah everyone's acting like a child so.

how does that happen that was right a. child. the amenities of modernity but we have a. notion of comfort I know but how do you. how do you how if you tuned into the Tim. Dylan [ __ ] show let's say you like. your [ __ ] medicine like a [ __ ] man. you all know that's how you change if. you had the if you literally I'm giving. you the reins right now you're the. president of the United States. yes let's let's first for the Chinese. are going back into internment camp. cause if you're the president I'm your. first lady yeah you are so that's a. George people joke instead of before you.

in turn the Chinese which I'm not. necessarily gets yeah well fort some. condos what do you do what do you have a. big speech you go out and tell everybody. they're in trouble well what do you. literally do yeah I start with some sort. of speech about nature yes sir IIIi want. to remind people that being detached. from the reality of nature is a luxury. but an illusion how do you think that. plays in an Applebee's in a Dulce well. I'm going in with armed guns.

oh so you're watching and you're. agreeing that's not a choice right no. you said I'm going to president first. yeah I'm doing a hostile takeover it to. do right when I get in yeah I'm making. an alignment with the I'm making I'm. doing it like Batman I'm taking full. power but I'm giving it away at the end. right yes I'm a principal guy I like. that I'm a great kid I like that a COO. and then you give a nice speech about. nature yeah my speeches like I want you. to go I want you to go look at this. thing that we're part of right very easy. to get detached because of the amenities.

of modernity the comforts provide you. this illusion that we're not part of. nature the laws of nature need to be. obeyed and our principles and our laws. of governance need to be in accordance. with nature we're a little out of whack. everyone's gotten a little spoiled we. need a little perspective here's why and. here's what I'm basing my perspective on. it's called nature right worship what. you want think what you want but this is. a system that was created based in. nature people are free for the pursuit. of happiness not guaranteed there's no.

such thing as equality. there's equality under the law right men. and women are not the same right can be. the same but that's the exception not. the rule men compete over here women. compete over here eventually hopefully. I'm so pro trans trans people should. compete over here and that's what it is. we're not equal it's not fair for a. woman who transitioned a year to go to. be competing against girls and. dominating that's not fair. trans women or trans women and that's a. beautiful thing it doesn't mean they're.

women okay so call it what you want I'll. give you control the semantics but stop. trying to say they're the same cuz. they're not because then they start. competing in the same leagues and that's. not fair it also is not fair to women. because it defines that out of existence. that's not fair it's anti-feminist so I. start with a couple of points like that. and then I bring out the guns and kill. whoever disagree I guess that I would. say we're not changing a thing but. everybody's getting a coupon for a. Popeye's chicken sandwich Wow go to. cruise that's why you're gonna be my.

secretary of [ __ ] Bulls everybody. could get cruise cuz I get right out and. I go listen hey boomers. here's reality we could try to remake. society in the image of nature or we. could all get on a big boat with a. 24-hour buffet and go to a little island. in Mexico where slaves will bring you. pina coladas and they're just gonna go. hey Saget where's the boat people find. you guys what is history hyenas where. the Tim Dylan the great Tim Dylan is is.

a friend of whatever he's in town we. want a montage we go by the way we need. to redo the podcast game right here in. New York City where everything starts. yes this episode is available on our. joint patreon by the lioness comm. patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys and on. paper the motion is that come New York. it's a tired old [ __ ] and I'll tell you. right now the comedy scene here I love. all you guys it's uh it's it it just.

limping along we'll be in Los Angeles. turns out to the citrus limping along. right now because it's in love with the. past yes it's in love with the past you. forgetting a little tool we have in our. back pocket called Fuhrer Andrew Schultz. I was amongst uh you know we're. following the guidance and the tutelage. of our Fuhrer Andrew Schultz if you go. to patreon.com/scishow sprite now the. million-dollar tier will get you the.

secret Tim Dylan episode number record. you want to pay a million dollars we're. gonna put out the episode the meet. crystianna's recorded 1 mil we just went. a little wild yeah I had 1 million. dollars we split it with you five. hundred three ways to true if you're. listening we're talking to you James. Altucher this is for you I'm doing his. prices another job and I am this is not. a joke we are putting up for $1,000,000. arrabal Tim Dylan episode the infamous. Tim Dunn episode for $1,000,000 on. patreon.com slash $1 patreon.com you can. hear us go a little wild yeah.

think about what we won't put out. because we put out a lot of stuff so I. don't want this going out I know nobody. wants anything going out if y'all had. his way with just podcast nothing but. going yeah yeah but the reality is you. know this is going out you know what. what do you think you think Jenny. Slade's calling you up to [ __ ] collab. now Jenny slate would be like hey can. you get me like a chicken parmesan here. up yes I think she's very funny by the. way I just think she thinks you're a.

postman yeah so I love her too we all. love her and she walk over at dead. bodies I respect the hell out and God. bless her she's doing great and you know. it is what it is I there is no loyalty. here's the deal when the Gillis thing. happened and you had everybody that. didn't even know Shane thrown him under. the brunt of the boss yeah there was no.

loyalty months comics now that sadness. me I don't like that that's the case but. that is the [ __ ] case anybody was. talking about loyalty or a short. efficient honor codes they're all full. of [ __ ] it's just not true. mm-hmm everybody kind of throws. everybody else under the bus and so far. I was one of the only people defending. shame you were and by the way I'm. including his close friends weren't. defending him so the reality of the. situation is it just is here's all you. need to know about entertainment and. where it's at and where the world is.

that here's what you need to know Shane. Gillis okay was dropped by his agents. jussie Smollett was not correct that's. all you need to know please know where. you are. who used police resources you. investigate a bogus hate crime and by. the way there were two guys in there had. been picked up for some drunk whatever. jerseys Mallette probably would have. fingered them and they would have been. in jail like yup - and it said guys so a. truly evil human being uh it was not.

dropped by UTI but but Shane was so. that's where we're at and a lot of. comedians went to go speak out about how. inappropriate Shane was when they had. said things that were absolutely worse. radition is just a hypocritical group of. people and anytime I hear that word. loyalty from a manager from an age from. anybody i I couldn't want to get further. away from because it's it ain't true but. it's not aware of it this jig is up it's. also it's also crazy to think that what. we just did on this podcast is anything. more than entertainment right you do.

understand we're professional comedians. if there's a journalist listening to. this right now. you do understand that we're comedians. we don't game by the way there there's. no journalist listen ya [ __ ] idiot is. who thinks he writes for a career maybe. listening to this to hold our feet to. the fire for anything that we're saying. this is a podcast by comedians we are. entertainers we don't hold any power any. positions of power and I don't seek it. we're seeking to entertain you to give. you something to do while you're killing.

time for dying right here you're waiting. to die and we're making that a little. less painful by bonnie was some [ __ ]. entertainment and that's where it is yes. I'm not running for public office or. anything I say on this podcast but we. were joking it's entertainment it's like. you're watching it's a character piece. I'm running for public office by the way. because I truly believe now why not I. think why not why not why not I mean. look if we're gonna just if it's all. over anyway I will go right I know. exactly where I'm gonna go it's a little.

district called. Long Island New York because I know what. to say to win yeah I will say we are we. are going to have a vote in a bar we're. gonna vote if we could smoke in the bar. yeah that's it yeah. we are gonna worry about the employees. of the bar are having you inhale. secondhand smoke they should have made. better choices. am I right Bob you'll be yeah rack the. rallies on 9/11 M okay he's in bail more. yeah 9/11 9/11 you get to commit one. hate crime and not by the purge yes a.

nonviolent hate crime the 9/11 you could. you could put yo you know you could you. could rip someone's hijab off it can't. be violent done or you could spray a. swastika on a McDonald's whatever it is. you get to do one nonviolent hate crime. at 9/11 this is how I'm gonna get. elected in Long Island furthermore D. wheeze the new D we law is if you can. state your full name first middle and. last and it matches your ID you are not.

too drunk to drive you're absolutely. fine got it right back in that car and. you do what you need to do good we can't. be Precious about worrying about life. and every single person no no the other. thing is there's gotta be an. acknowledgment and Long Island people. understand it's justice just gotta be an. acknowledgement that on the Long Island. Rail Road there are no laws so the laws. of man do not come into the Long Island. Railroad when those doors closed we're. back to the Coliseum and ancient Rome. yeah blood first blood yeah is the.

please the law of the land. yep that's it I love it and that's I'm. gonna write you got my vote go to. history hyenas support their patron on. Tim Dylan show Tim Dylan comedy calm. dates coming up McGoo bees Austin Texas. at cap city fun stuff coming up in. Toronto House of comedy in Minneapolis. Arizona blah blah blah a lot of fun. we're up in Vancouver where Toronto Tim. Villa comedy calm all those links all. those tickets fun stuff mega McCain.

short coming thanks to everybody who. bought her other shirt we're designing a. mega contra it might take a while and. it's interesting somebody's with her the. other night and she's not a fan she did. not like that I called her fat by the. way I said so many worse things well. then you don't what are you gonna do. back to the history hyenas and uh. goodbye.