Tony Hawk: The Man With The $1.4 Billion Name! Burnout, Obsession & Regrets

I'm either gonna make this or get taken. away on a stretch. it changed my life completely. how could you prepare for anything like. that. Tony Hawk began riding a skateboard when. he was nine years old and when he turned. 16 he was the best skateboarder in the. whole wide world. moving the outcast and the outcast. activity I got picked on I got bullied. even when I turned Pro I would leave. high school for a big skate event I'm.

signing autographs and then I would come. back and be a ghost in the hallways. again I just wanted to see skateboarding. get more popular but I got famous by. accident suddenly I was a chosen. Ambassador I was making income I owned a. house in my last year of high school so. I was doing talk shows and I was doing. big appearances my video game was a big. hit how much revenue a billion dollars. wow the trajectory just seemed like it. was never going to end and then it. dropped very quickly. I was so hyper fixated on my skating I.

didn't really work on my Humanity I was. a machine and I'd go and do the event. and win the trophy go home it didn't. allow me to be myself very much did you. lose people yeah made them feel like. they weren't the priority and a lot of. it was just being afraid of intimacy and. I regret that I started getting burned. down in competition. the term burnout is used a lot these. days what did that experience teach you. about what causes burnout it taught me. that.

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not sure if you've ever listened to this. podcast before but I'm quite predictable. with how I start these conversations and. I'll I'll be transparent in terms of my. rationale. um when I read about a story like yours. and I read about how much of anomaly you. were in many respects of your life I. always ask the question why and how. where did that begin where did that. start and having. you know read right back into your your. parents history and your history I saw. signs of of that but.

seeing as you're here. best place to ask you can you give me. the context that you believe was pivotal. in shaping you to become the person that. you are today. I think early on. I was I was obsessed when I first. started skating. I found something that spoke to me I. found a community of people that were we. were just a bunch of Misfits and. outcasts that sort of. fit together somehow and I loved what.

skateboarding brought to me in terms of. my sense of identity my sense of. self-confidence and the creative aspects. around it. I just loved it and all I wanted to do. was. was it as much as possible. um and there was no. there was no end goal there were no. there was no fame or fortune in the. cards because no one had ever had that. from skating even the top skaters. so.

what was it it was just an obsession and. um I wanted to do it as best I could. always. even even when I reached the top of the. ranks of competition I still want to get. better. when you say obsessed. um and the way you describe it almost. sounds like it was medicine yeah and in. a lot of ways it was I mean I I was. a smaller kid. um I got we used to call it picked on I. got I got picked on a lot bullied and.

um I didn't Excel that much in team. sports I I just kind of was Middle. Ground. um if that and then when I found skating. every time I'd go skate I got better at. it. and it was incremental sometimes almost. immeasurable but I knew that I was. getting I was each time I was improving. and I couldn't say that about any of the. other sports I was doing I got I mean. baseball basketball like yeah sure. sometimes I'd score mostly I wouldn't.

but I never felt like oh I'm really. I'm really getting to a different level. of this it was more like I did it. because it was expected of me and every. time I skated I got better every time I. would go to the park. I would learn some little new technique. that would lead me to something else. what was that progression doing for you. on a psychological level. it gave me a sense of purpose. it gave me an outlet for my energy and. my frustrations and it gave my my.

parents some. um much needed reprieve from my from. uh my determination. that's my that's my my mom put it uh in. her best way is that. I I was I was difficult I was always. very. thick-headed I wanted to do my things my. way or I wanted to do on my terms and. she said when I found skateboarding I. really found a a directive for that and.

um when her friends would say he's such. a nightmare she'd say he's just very. determined. Nancy that is right yep Frank announced. your parents what was what was your home. life like with them. um it was pretty. quiet I don't know I um my parents were. older when I was born so it kind of felt. like I was raised by grandparents. because my dad was 45 my mom was 43.

by the time I was at an age where I was. being very active and doing things they. were they were kind of in retirement. mode. um so and and they I can't say they were. I don't know they they weren't. they weren't close. it was almost like they were just. roommates and so that I I definitely. rubbed off on me in in a lot of ways but. but it just felt like oh this is just a.

functional household that's not full of. love necessarily. I'm the youngest of four. um I sometimes wonder whether sometimes. the youngest child of the bunch because. you were the youngest of three right. um the parents almost. think that they've finished with. parenting oh for sure in my case my my. older siblings were all my my brother is. closest he's 13 years older than me. so absolutely they thought they were. done raising children I was I was not.

planned and. and I think that my parents were kind of. reaching a winter of their of their. marriage. um even before that or just after I was. born so it was a little icy and I think. that because they were from that. generation they you know those. Generations you just stay together no. matter what and so they did and and. um. it's not like it was it was terrible. like I said just it just wasn't that. warm.

I can also relate to not being. necessarily planned was there ever a. were you ever cognizant of that is it. like were you ever aware that has did. that ever have an effect on your psyche. that you weren't planned. at all no I never thought about that. I guess I never I I was never that. deep in my introspection to to worry or. concern myself with that fact I just. knew that I wanted to go skate you were.

really um really intelligent kid I read. that your IQ was like 144 or something. yeah maybe at one time. which is which is surprising typically I. think of um a child that has that void. of Independence and how which it sounds. like you had of not necessarily being. the best academically or in terms of. smarts especially if they're distracted. or preoccupied with something like. sports like skateboarding one would. think that Academia intelligence might. fall by the wayside. um no I always relied on that I I was in.

the um in the gifted classes uh growing. up and so I was with other kids that. that were of that same elk and. um so I always thought that that my path. would be more. Academia based I you know I I thought. that I would be. I actually thought it was gonna be a. math teacher because I excelled in math. and and I liked helping my friends with. it so I thought oh that that is the. maybe that's my.

my trajectory and then when I found. skating it wasn't that my academics fell. by the wayside but it was more that oh. maybe I have something else here. and um it really wasn't until I was in. high school that I realized more of the. potential of that I feel like skating. these days is um still is really cool. now but having read back through your. story it seems like it wasn't as it was. not not at all in fact in my early high. school days I had to hide my I had to I.

chose to hide my skateboard in the. bushes behind the school. um because I use it as transportation. and because I would get hassled carrying. it around school. um you know they would they would say. not so nice things as I would walk. stroll by with my skateboard even though. I was starting to find some sense of. success with it I I was actually at that. point uh sponsored I had a company that. was giving me boards that was sending me. to events and even when I turned Pro.

which meant that I was had my own. skateboard model it was just not cool. so it was cool in certain sex like I. would I would leave High School I would. go to. for instance Houston for a big skate. event and there's all kinds of skaters. there I'm signing autographs taking. photos and then I would come back from. that weekend and maybe even have won. some some money to go to high school and. be a ghost in the hallways again. that's the kind of dichotomy I was.

living. you talked about how the progress was. like a motivating a driving factor that. you know getting incrementally better. every time you did it outside of the. technical aspect of skateboarding what. was the um the value for you. outside of like doing the tricks and. stuff what what what was like filling. you up uh the the culture the community. of it I loved everything about it the I. love the attitude the DIY aspect the the. Renegade. um attitude that you would you have to.

hop fences you know to go skate an empty. swimming pool or to a to go skate a a. schoolyard and. and it was just so there was so much. art and creativity involved it was like. any skater it's more most likely they're. gonna play also play music or they're. also going to be artists or or do other. interesting things and so. there was a soundtrack to it it was it. was embedded in in punk music because.

that was the same sort of vibe and. attitude that we had and. um it was just more like oh this is this. is my scene this is this is I have the. sense of belonging here and I don't care. if I don't fit in with my classmates or. my peers. so you started you got your first. hand-me-down board at eight years old. uh yeah like nine or ten yeah from your. brother from my brother yeah. and by 12 your.

your sponsored um by a sponsored yeah. which which basically meant that I got. free skateboards once in a while it was. right it wasn't some there was no. contractor it wasn't like a million okay. no and then at 14. um I turned Pro but all that really. meant was that. I moved up a category in competition. so there was there was sponsored amateur. and then there was professional and. to be professional just meant that you. were competing for a 100 first place.

prize money well at what point did you. realize that you were good. comparatively. um. I think it was. it would have been later on in my pro. career when I started to figure out how. to do these what they called. they used to call them circus tricks but. I like to think they were more. avant-garde. and I would do these these sort of. unique moves that I created but I I. started to learn how to do them more in.

the air like at an impressive height and. I think it was around. probably more rounds. 16 age 16 when I started to realize like. oh I can do these things. at Heights that is reserved for very few. um and I I can do them on other terrain. besides just my familiar home park. um and I guess that's probably the point. where I felt like I I have something. that is more valid than just.

a niche style of skating that only. happens in at my hometown Park. you know when you you think about why. you were able to do that like why you. were incrementally better or you know. significantly better than your peer. group have you ever figured out in terms. of what they call Talent why that is is. it. smart is it physical attributes. um I think it was that. I. I wasn't afraid to step out of my.

comfort zone. and I also wasn't afraid to get hurt. along the way. and I accepted that as part of the. process. and I can't say that very many people. did that I mean definitely definitely my. peer group the ones that were skating at. the time they knew what it took to to. get that far and they were willing to. take the hits for it but also I like to. explore other techniques that weren't. comfortable or or maybe that I even. thought were cool because I wanted to. learn everything. and so I would I would start I would go.

off on these tangents of trying certain. tricks or a board manipulation and then. lean into that and do every single. variation of that and then move on to. something else and then all of that. started to combine into this trick. repertoire that I that I had that was. that was pretty deep. you know they say when you if you want. to master something you've got to do 10. 000 hours yeah sounds like you did a lot. of hours at that at that very I mean at. some point I was probably doing just one. trick ten thousand times.

[Laughter]. we say all of this you know you said. later in my pro career and then you said. you were 16. yeah well my I've had a pretty lengthy. pro career but I would say that around. age 16 is when I started to come into my. own and and was able to shut down any of. the of the pushback or the haters so to. speak because they were all saying oh. he's only good at his home park or he's. only you know he only does these these.

goofy little tricks and at some point it. was like you can't really deny that I'm. doing these tricks in the most difficult. circumstances and consistently and so. I had this this run of success in my. late teens that was I thought. unparalleled I mean in terms of suddenly. I was I was making income I owned a. house when I was still in my last year. of high school. from my earnings. and everything's the trajectory just.

seemed like it was. it was never going to end and then it it. dropped very quickly in the early 90s. and then I had a good three or four. years were very slow. um and and touch and go in terms of. trying to make a living provide for a. family. um and then things kind of came back. around in the late 90s so when I say. early in my or you know late in my. career there's a few stages of that.

in that first stage it's from 16 to uh. about 20 23 23 yeah and at that point I. read that by 16 years old you were the. best in the world you were widely right. uh I I had why I was ranked number one. for a while yeah. um and It's Tricky though I mean I I. don't like I don't like saying that just. because skating is is subjective and. it's apples to oranges so. who's the best that's all in the guys. the beholder I did well in competition I. I got good scores and I had a good run.

I mean I think you're slightly. underplaying that because I you know I. was reading through some stats and I. read that 16 you were widely regarded as. the best skateboarder in the world and. by 25 you'd won 73 of the 103. professional contact contests you'd. entered finishing in second place a. further 19 times. which is for me pretty freakish I yeah I. mean like I said I had a good run but. also it's a specific style so I was. skating uh pools and half pipes.

um and then in the early 90s Street. skating came into its own and what you. see today with people jumping downstairs. on handrails Ledges and things like that. that was just starting to Blossom. and I realized pretty early on that that. was not my strength and that my. um ratio of success to injury was much. higher doing that so I I kind of I kind. of gave it up I was in it for a while I.

was skating some of the competitions and. I was doing a lot of Tours and things. and then at one point I was driving home. from a tour. um I had sprained one ankle almost to. the point of breaking it but somehow. didn't and then in the process of. nursing that one I was still skating. because we were on tour I I rolled the. other ankle trying to save this ankle. and then I'm driving home with these. with these uh with ice on both ankles. with a car full of of skaters and in.

that moment I thought I can't keep doing. it this way like this this is not. sustainable I'm not going to be able to. be a pro skater much longer if I'm if I. think I'm gonna. do this type of skating and so I'm gonna. stick with more of the half pipe which. which is what I know even though that. wasn't the popular way of skating I just. knew that if I wanted to keep skating. into my adult life I was gonna have to. stick with with my expertise.

and I'm right in thinking from what. you've said there that your skating. career started to really take off you. know 15 16 kind of Peaks at one point at. around that 23ish I would say around 21. 22 is when it started to Peak yeah and. at what point in that Journey did you. think I'm gonna Escape professionally. perform the rest of my life was there a. point where you go this is a job now you. never no um in fact when I was uh 24 is. when I started my company birdhouse and. I honestly thought starting a company.

was my way of of sort of bowing out of. the spotlight and not being a so-called. professional skater because there was. there were very there was very little. opportunity for me as a half pipe or. vert skater to be doing anything and I. was trying to nurture a group of skaters. that were mostly Street and trying to. give them. New Opportunities and trying to uh. have them promote our company as well so. I thought that I was curating a team and. I was going to be sort of the ringleader.

of it but not be considered a pro myself. I never quit skating though that was. that was just in my blood and so at some. point. a few years later. things start to pick up again the X. Games happened. um they had a they had a half pipe. contest and I was still on top of my. game. so after that I started to compete a lot. more because the interest grew and then. I was I was winning a lot of events it's.

we we don't often think it's possible. for a sport to kind of experience a. downturn right commercial downturn like. thinking about the big Sports of today. the NBA basketball whatever it be the. thought that it could kind of have an. economic downturn and put the athletes. out of business for a while is kind of. inconceivable for me so I mean most of. most of my peers quit. in the 1990s because yeah or or quit or. not. I can't say quit most of them found jobs. because so what what happened in the. skating industry the commercial side of.

the business. there was a few things I think that. skating had gone through Cycles in the. past in the late 70s skating was the new. fad it was like the if for especially in. the US was like the yo-yo and it's the. new toy and it's a transportation and. you can do all these things and then and. then that that fad kind of faded out and. then in the 80s it became this thing. because we were skating the empty pools. and there was this attitude and the. music and the hairdos and the graphics.

and then it and Back to the Future and. so that was another spike in popularity. and a lot of skate parks were opening in. those days and I think in the late 80s. the liability became too much for these. Escape facilities and they just started. closing very quickly I mean there was. just a toppling of of skate parks. through I would say 89 to 91 and then. there was no place to do it because. there were no public parks these all. these facilities are private there were.

a few but they were not good it. um and so all these private Parks were a. closing shop and then we had the skaters. had nowhere to go. so that's when skating took to the. underground and became more. street-centric. your dad was working in the industry as. well he was in the in the 80s yeah he he. helped to form the national skateboard. Association which sanctioned most of the. events through those years. how did how did he get into. skateboarding.

he saw he saw me and and he saw how much. I loved it and he saw a very a serious. lack of organization. um and he was always very supportive of. his kids I mean my brother was a surfer. he would drive him to the beach at dawn. to to get the good ways my my sister was. in a band he would he would be the. Roadie for the band and drive all their. gear to the gigs so when I started. skating he was all in on supporting it.

but he saw that it was just sort of. chaos there were there was very little. organization there were very few events. and he saw a group of kids like me that. loved it and had very little support. it's been quite entrepreneurial about. that about your dad founding them yeah I. don't I don't he never did it he never. really got paid so you know to think. that it was entrepreneurial it was it. was more altruistic than anything. did that create a conflict of interest. if or like it was hard yeah it was.

absolutely difficult for me in those. years because I was doing well. and then there was uh there were uh. claims of nepotism. um there was a lot of animosity and it. was uncomfortable for me because my dad. was always there and I was doing well. so it would be one thing if I wasn't. skating that well if I was just sort of. mid-range. um but I think that all of that just. drove me to get better and prove. everyone wrong I mean I I'd like to say.

that. I didn't I didn't enjoy it but it. definitely lit a fire. it's interesting when when people attack. you in such a way or they try and. discredit you especially when you're of. course only when you're doing well. it can evoke a series of responses in. you yeah I I was under a lot of pressure. and a lot of accusations like that and. um. I just kind of put my head down and just. focused on my skating until.

until I shut him up. um but even then it was. it was always tricky you know it was. like that then my dad he got out of it. um and not long after that he got sick. and passed away in lung cancer. um but. then the X Games came around and like I. said I was still on top of my game and. then I was the I was sort of the one. they were focusing on because my name. had resonated from the previous. generation and then I was I was doing.

well in competition so then the other. skaters were accusing me of hogging the. spotlight I I'm I'm not choosing the. programming here. and so that was tricky too but I I think. I learned so much from my early days of. of sort of being the outcast and the. outcast activity that that it you. weren't really gonna I I had sort of. built up a resilience to all that. but it's still difficult right like the. outcast and the outcast activity oh yeah. I felt very isolated yep.

in real that's the word isolated but in. real terms what does that look like for. a young man who's doing something that. he loved he's got really [ __ ] good at. it so now there's they're pointing the. camera at him there's all this. commercial pressure what impact does. that have on on the love for it. well luckily I had been doing it for so. long at that point and had seen it come. and go that. I was excited in the sense that. skateboarding was going to get a new A.

Renewed interest. and if I was the conduit to that then. I'll accept it I wasn't trying to get. all the glory I just wanted to see. skateboarding. be more accessible and get more popular. and so at some point. I don't want to say that anyone. appointed me but but it was definitely I. was this chosen ambassador. to skateboarding. um because I could I could do interviews.

and I could speak on behalf of skating. at its core but also to a mainstream. audience to make them understand why. skating could be valid or why it would. be a positive influence on their kids. the one of the reasons you gave for why. you love skateboarding and why it filled. you up originally was because of that. camaraderie though and isolation seems. to be kind of the opposite of um I I was. isolated in the sense that the the. hardcore skaters the older generation. didn't support me didn't want anything.

to do with me but I did have my crew I. mean it wasn't completely isolated it. was I had a few friends that we all had. the same sense of of values and the same. sort of directives for skating so. um I would bounce ideas off of them and. we would come up with with tricks. together sometimes sometimes it was just. something that they were asking me to do. um but but that sent some camaraderie is. what I'm talking about. um but it was very it was a very limited. crew and yeah I mean I was I chose to do.

this Outcast activity as a kid already. separating me from my classmates my. peers kids my age they're like. skateboarding's so lame why are you. doing that. then I choose a skateboard my style of. skateboarding is not cool it's. considered a circus like I'm just a. circus freak doing these little. uh baton Twirls with my skateboard. so then I'm cast aside from the. skateboarding community. and that that's what became. that became isolating.

but. that all that stuff just would fuel me. to to get better. and I I didn't. it's not like I'm thankful for it but I. accepted it and I went out to prove. myself. I am I I sat with a motivation. psychologist called Daniel pink and he. was telling me one of the they did these. studies on people in terms of trying to. figure out how their motivation. fluctuates and he found that when people. get paid for something that was once a. hobby their love and motivation for it.

declines which I thought was really. paradoxical I wouldn't expect when you. get paid to do a hobby you'd expect. motivation to increase I agree with that. except that. when I got into skateboarding no one was. getting paid. no no one was getting accolades no one. was getting attention. and so I never aspired to that and what. I see now is I see I do see kids that. get into skateboarding with the notion. that they will get rich or famous or and.

or famous. and if they get any sense of fame or. Fortune they lose their motivation so I. agree with you in that sense but if. you're getting into a an activity a. sport an art form or whatever that has. not been established and it's not there. there's no clear path to success I feel. like your motivation is always just to. get better at it. and and. the money and and the fam and everything. that's all incidental to just being able. to keep doing it did you did you love. for ever fluctuate.

um only when. I started getting burned out in. competition. um sometime around 1988 89 uh I was. doing really well in the events. and it started to become repetitive for. me. I would go to an event I'd have to I'd. have to hide new tricks from my my. competitors and from the judges because. at some point the judges were giving me.

scores based on what they thought I. could do not compared to everyone else. in the event but just what they thought. I was capable of so if I came to an. event with some new tricks and they saw. me doing those new tricks in practice. and I didn't do them in my competition. runs I would get marked down. based on what they thought you know. based on judging me against myself. and that was fine like I accepted all. that but it was more that that. it got repetitive it started to get.

it started to suck the fun out of it. because I was just this machine like. this competitive machine and my. competitors who I thought were my. friends who I still do. were very much. under the impression that oh well Tony's. just gonna win so we're hoping for. second and they would tell me that. and they thought that that was a. compliment to me to me it was just it. was crushing because it just meant that. that somehow they were separating me. from the pack and the the crew that I. loved like the I I love the the.

camaraderie of the team and and the. camaraderie of all the skaters and it. was like they're just pushing me out. from that because they think that I'm on. a different. level or playing or whatever it was and. and I'd as much as you you think that's. a compliment it wasn't. the term burnout is used a lot these. days. um people use it in in their jobs in. works and in hobbies and such what what. um what did that experience teach you. about what causes burnout. um.

well it it taught me that even if you're. doing what you love it's not always. going to be enjoyable. um because of the pressure of success. because of the self-imposed pressure. that you put. um but. what it did teach me was the value. of letting go. and when I let go of that even as hard. as it was because my my sponsors were. saying if you quit competing you're out.

there was no other path to success in. skateboarding you couldn't make a living. on YouTube on social media you know a. reality show whatever it was it was just. your competition rankings that was it. that's what you're that's what your. success was and they they told me you. know what are you gonna do how do you. expect to make a living and I was like I. don't know but I can't keep going this. direction and what happened was when I. was when I was removed from it. I started to appreciate. the process of learning new tricks more.

I started to appreciate the idea that I. could be more creative and take more. chances and at some point I I missed. competing but I had to sort of discover. that Within Myself. on my own terms and then when I came. back to competing. I let go of the idea of perfection I let. go of the idea that I had to do the best. every single time and I took way more. chances and sometimes it didn't work.

sometimes I didn't make the finals but. when I did make the finals I was doing. it on a level that I was proud of I. wasn't. I wasn't phoning it in so to speak I. wasn't being conservative with with my. my Approach. and that became much more fun. it was more risky but when it would work. it was something that I was much more. proud of. is there is there is there a um I. sounded a lot to me like you're you.

built this identity because you've been. so successful and you almost had to kind. of decouple from that identity which. always feels like a big risk to people. in their jobs yeah it was but but uh it. was either that or quit quit altogether. because it was really Weighing on me it. was real it was very difficult. when you say very difficult what does. that mean in in Practical terms you mean. like sleepless nights or. yeah and and. dreading. events.

going going to an event and and dreading. it I mean it's it's almost like Pink. Floyd The Wall it's just I was building. a wall around everyone around myself and. and Performing was just obligatory. because everyone expected me to do it. everyone expected me to do well to to. win the event whatever it was and there. was no. celebration in that there was no. there was nothing that that made me feel.

elated it was just it was I was a. machine and I'd go and do the event and. and win the trophy get the prize money. and go home. and then go skate and go try to learn. new tricks. that was the fun part. but really what I was doing was just. trying to prepare for the next event. which is probably another in a week or. two away. is. um. it's quite surprising but it's a story. that I've heard over and over again this.

idea that your success almost. disconnected you from. from some it disconnected you from. others and probably from yourself in. many respects and I think I think about. this a lot how when you become. successful you can you need to be. careful that you don't get disconnected. along the way there's lots of Temptation. with talent to disconnect yourself. um whether you're a lawyer and you've. just been good at being a lawyer and you. end up 20 15 years down the line and you. go what the [ __ ] am I doing here and who. have I become or you're a pro. skateboarder and you kind of drift away. from.

from the essence of what makes us feel. connected. oh for sure and I saw I saw plenty of my. peers I think one one thing that saved. me is that I loved the skating so much. that I saw my peers get distracted with. partying. with the excess and they would start to. lose their motivation and their and. their skill sets and I recognized that. very early on and thought I don't want. to go down that road because the skating. is too important to me this I want to.

keep performing at a top level. um and. for sure I had my I I had my. distractions through my through my life. and and through my adult my adult years. but. um but skating was always such a high. priority that that I never lost that. did you have to you talked about you've. seen some of your friends at that time. go down the wrong path because because. of Temptations yeah did you ever notice. yourself drifting down that path.

um yeah I think it was more the when I. got caught up in the fame of it all in. um more in the late 90s early 2000s when. my video game was a big hit and suddenly. I was not just doing skate events I was. doing talk shows and I was doing big. appearances and and getting caught up in. that level of Fame is very disorienting. and I could see myself. I could see myself. falling into that where it's like well.

I'm now I'm a celebrity. and now I will go to the Red Carpet. Events and do the you know and the clubs. and all that and I I definitely indulged. a bit in that but at some point. recognize that this is just not what I. want to be doing and this is not. this is not not as fun as skating. and and these are not the people I. really identify with. I mean a lot of the people that I saw.

through those years especially at the. big events and stuff they they all they. really wanted was to be famous. and at some point I I got famous by. accident. and it's not necessarily what I wanted. and at some point I took inventory of. that and I realized that I don't really. care. you know what I mean like I don't I. don't care if I don't get into this VIP. thing whatever it is like take it or. leave it. I am when I got a little bit of money I.

think I ha my insecurities meant that I. had to have certain beliefs fail me. before I learned them so I was the kid. that went to like got a little bit of. money started going to the nightclubs. buying all the champagne. leaves you feeling fairly Hollow after a. while if you're paying attention. absolutely yeah I mean that's the thing. is I just felt. especially in through those years when I. was going through the the fire of of. celebrity culture. I never felt fulfilled and you'd wake up. in the morning it's like what what was. that.

what good and also it was it was. distracting me from my own kids and I. think that that's really what what made. me want to make a positive change in my. life is that I felt like I was not I was. not told I was there but I wasn't really. available emotionally to my children. um as much as I could be because I was. so distracted with all this other noise. and. um I I pulled it around I mean I was. able to. get back get be more connected.

um just be part of what they were doing. even on a more basic level and that to. me is way more fulfilling it is I mean. that's just you know I could. I could wax poetic but it I do feel like. I I feel so much more. confident and fulfilled and excited. about all those things to see my kids. um to see my kids thrive. than to care about.

getting invited to the Oscars uh. sometimes in my life anyway my partner's. been the person to point that out before. I've noticed it in myself so my. girlfriend will notice that I may be. losing my way a little bit in terms of. priorities and it'll require her. feedback to tell me. that I'm losing my way a little bit for. me to really notice it in myself do you. resonate with that at all. um I. I would say yes if you were asking me. five ten years ago but now I do see it I.

see it myself it's I'm I'm much more. cognizant of it in my own choices and. it is wild I mean I never imagined that. I'd be a pro skater of past 20 honestly. because when you were. when you were my when you were a kid. skating in my era all the once you reach. an age of responsibility you had to quit. because no one could make it wasn't. anyone's job right so to be skating in.

my 20s and then into my 30s was wild it. was I mean I was in Uncharted Territory. but I was still getting better at it and. then when I reached my 40s it was like. really still you guys still think this. is okay for me to do and not that. I was looking for that in that kind of. approval. but it was kind of a surprise and also I. kept getting better at it in those years. and then to be doing it in my 50s is. just like. a a lucid dream it's crazy that.

um it's funny I kind of went through the. fire it was like when I was a kid it was. like oh you're pretty good for your age. and then when I got in my 30s and 40s. like you still skate like haven't you. grown out of it and now when I'm in my. 50s it's like hey you're pretty good for. your age. when was your um when do you if you look. back on your years of in terms of. technical ability when was your. professional. Peak or is it now. oh uh I think it was in my. probably in my mid to late 30s and early.

40s because that's when I was still. doing. all of my high impact high risk moves. but combined with highly technical moves. so I kind of had I had the the gamut of. of of the skating in terms of being able. to. do the big stuff. um the dangerous stuff and also the very. the very technical stuff and so as I've. moved into my Twilight years I don't.

know what you call this but I've learned. to to focus more on the technical. because it's it's more low impact and it. keeps me keeps me healthy for the most. part I mean I am I am nursing uh I'm. still recovering from a broken femur. last year but even that has taught me. that. I still love doing this and I still love. it even if I'm not going to be. at the the top of the game or or if I'm. even gonna be.

on video or or doing it in front of. people I still want to do it. um and I still love it but like I said. I've I've sort of. focused my energy more into the. technical moves and and I would say the. tricks that I was learning before I got. hurt were more appreciated by skaters. themselves they weren't going to move. the needle on X Games or anything. to get to your level in any industry if. you were advising a kid that's maybe an.

artist a DJ whatever when you look back. on what it takes to get there what are. the like core components of that level. of Mastery and success and like do that. you must have sometimes think like like. why me. because you know. living such an anomalous life and. becoming number one in anything I think. I've seen it over and over again where. people start to ask themselves the. question like an existential question. like. uh sure yeah I every day but um I think. to to answer your question.

the focus it takes is is pretty intense. to get to do especially what I do. um for so many years. and also I think that. the ability to. to to listen and to take cues or. inspiration from others around you in. terms of inspiring or influencing what. you do. and I don't mean like I'm not saying. like borrowing or stealing Styles or.

anything I'm talking about just being. open to oh that's that's a new way to do. it and and even collaborating with. people what if we tried this or maybe. you did that and and. um not just living in your own in your. own bubble. um because some people tend to do that. they they have their way they have they. have they found what how they succeed. how they keep moving forward and they. stay in that lane they stay in that. bubble and sometimes that works but for. the most part you can only go so far.

with it and you've got to start to sort. of Branch out and see what else is there. in terms of your chosen. activity sport art whatever it is. um and I I love that idea that I'm. getting out of my comfort zone. and trying something weird and it's. probably not going to work right away. and it's probably going to be super ugly. when I finally do it but I'm gonna get. to a point where it's more natural. do you what's the balance between.

learning the rules of the trade I how. it's already been done and learning to. do it your way I always think this to. become great you need to like be the. best at how it's done now or do you need. to like add a little sprinkle of. yourself well I luckily skating is so. subjective that. adding your own Flair to it is always. encouraged. and so for instance there's some tricks. basic tricks that.

you know 80 of professional skaters can. do this one trick but if you take a. picture of one of them and put it on. Silhouette I can tell you who it is. because everyone has their own style of. it. and what makes for a good style. subjectively it's I'd say it's sort of. the flow of the move from start to. finish including when you're before you. even leave the ground. or the or the ramp or whatever it is you.

know that you make it look like one one. fluid motion and that you can. twist it torque it a little differently. and then someone else. but stay in control. that's what it's about I it's it it's. really hard to convey. and some of that has to be. like you know. Talent I'm struggling with the word. talent but some of it uh nature of a. nurture yeah sure.

everyone has their own different body. types and their own thing but but you. can see influences like. for instance. um. we haven't we have this uh girl on our. team Rhys Nelson she's very young but. she skates for ramps and you can tell. who she skates with by her trick. selection. because she's influenced by the the. certain skaters that she's with and and. some of them have very specific moves. that that are associated with them.

and like she just learned from those. slides all right I'm just I'm gonna go. down into the weeds for you show their. Kip knob slides which is a signature. move of a skater named Colin McKay and I. and I literally said have you been. skating with Colin she said yeah he. comes here in the morning sometimes and. skates with me. it's like there it is interesting. when I when you speak to Surfers they. talk about how surfing's like a metaphor. for life. and they like Wax lyrical about you know. what that metaphor is is skating a.

metaphor for Life uh it can be sure I I. think the the value of. not giving up the value of believing in. yourself and the value of. of. working through your own challenges. I think that's probably the the biggest. metaphor and for me. um what I learned from it is also the. value of taking risks. you know in the greater sense uh of. becoming a businessman.

I wasn't afraid to take risk skating I'm. not afraid to take risks in business. the value of not giving up and taking. risks I had you spent 12 years trying to. master one particular trick yes called. the 900 which I think I did on the on. the video game back in the day when I. was when I was younger which is like a. two and a half two and a half spin yeah. two and a half spin trick and it took. you you tried for 12 years. off and on yes. um from the first time I tried it had. anyone done it before you no.

um yeah that was a battle. um so I learned seven twenties in 1985. and the next stage of progression for. that in terms of spinning and for. skating would be 900 the the. what makes it so much more difficult is. that you're blind to your Landing Zone. twice when you do a 900. when you do a. 540 or even a 720 you're only blind to. your Landing Zone once.

and when you pass it twice it's very. hard to spot where you should be or to. even know uh spatially where you are so. it took me the first probably five years. of attempts just to figure out where I. was in the air and when I say five years. I'm not talking about like every day it. was more I would I would get fired up. I'd had a good session or I was skating. a really good ramp and then I would try. a couple and they always ended in some. sort of injury you know it was very hard.

to get out of it safely. um I broke my rib one time when I really. thought I had it. but once I figured out that spinning. then I started to explore okay how do I. get the landing and that's when I. started actually pursuing it I would say. more in like the years of 94 to 96 I was. actively trying it regularly and when I. finally thought that I had it I put it. down and then I I broke my rib because I. was leaning too far forward and.

in that moment. I kind of gave up on it. that was in 96. because I thought I had. all the pieces to it I I had. every element I had in my head I I had. it was the it was the right take off it. was right setup is the right Spin and. apparently I can't figure out how to how. to land it properly so fast forward to. 1999. um they're having a best trick event at.

the X Games and halfway into the event I. did my best trick. which I had planned that I had only done. once before and it was a variation of a. 720 it was it was a very old 720. so I did that trick and then I had 10. minutes left of this event. I don't know where else to go from there. except try what the next trick that I. would like to do which is a 900. um and. when I started trying it. I'd say the first few attempts I just.

did for the crowd it was more like this. is. this is my next state or this is what's. next maybe it's not for me but you know. this is what I would like to see done. and then somewhere around my fourth or. fifth try I realized that. I'm always getting the right amount of. speed my my snap is good the snap is the. take off when you actually leave the the. top of the ramp and grab your board. because a lot of times the snap is if. that's off it's tragic. my snap was good I can see the landing.

Zone and I thought you know what if I'm. ever going to try to land this again. it'll be tonight. and if I break a rib so what like I'm. either gonna make this or get taken away. on a stretcher those are the only two. outcomes. um and then when I did finally try to. make it somewhere around the I don't. know ninth or tenth attempt. I fell forward again but I didn't get. hurt. and something.

there was something clicked. in my head that said. why not shift your weight to your back. foot. during the spin. and then try to land it and for some. reason I never had. I never had that Clarity because when I. would go to try to make it I'd get hurt. and I'd have to go home. so in this particular instance I didn't. get hurt so I thought okay what if I. shift my weight towards the back and. then I shift my weight towards the back. and I fell backwards and that was the.

epiphany. because. all I have to do is split the difference. and then I made the next one. all they have to do is put the. difference I mean so muggle like me you. make it sound easy what was that moment. like. it was just a big relief I mean it was. it was it was definitely a highlight of. my skate career of my of my. um competitive career but for me it was. just this weight lifted from me because. it had always sort of.

hung on me that oh 900 it's got to be. possible and there were a few of us. chasing it there were other skaters that. were getting pretty close to it too. um but no one had figured out how to. ride away. once you've done it once was it easy to. repeat easier to repeat yeah it took a. while for me to do a second one. and then after I did my second one then. I could do it pretty regularly. and at this time you've got this deal. with Activision bubbling bubbling away. at that time we had been working on a.

video game for about a year and a half. so there was definitely a crazy Synergy. perfect storm in that moment because I. did that trick that Drew a lot of. attention to obviously me but uh but not. just me but skateboarding in general and. the X Games and then that was in June. and then we released uh. what became Tony oxpro skater in. September. wow and I was watching the video of you. saying that you you called the guy. Activision to ask him to include the 900.

trick it never stopped yeah I I emailed. him yeah that's a good story I I emailed. uh neversoft the next day and I said hey. I did this thing. um and I think that people are gonna. expect to see it in the game now and I. know we didn't animate a 900 but I feel. like if you guys have time to squeeze it. in and we were already in beta with the. game which meant that we were going to. submit it to the console manufacturers.

and once you do that you cannot edit it. you can't alter it. um and I remember. Joel who was the the head of never. stopped he emailed me back right away. and he said way ahead of you you [ __ ]. rule. and then they got it in. I mean and the rest is history right I. guess I hoped I like to think I'm still. creating it you know your father Frank. he'd been such an avid huge supporter of. you up until that point but he didn't he.

didn't get to live to see. the real all of this stuff after you. were sort of 27 28 years old right no he. he saw the first X Games right and to. him that was as big as things could ever. get because. he was a big sports fan not just you. know obviously he loved skateboarding. but he also loved team sports. and. um for him to see skateboarding on the. sports network that was for him the. coming of age. gosh I bet he couldn't have imagined.

no I mean and to think that it's gone on. to be. such a a beloved sport internationally. and in the Olympics I mean all that is. is just beyond. what he would have imagined do you has. every question have you ever wished that. he could have seen the what would happen. with your career professionally but also. in business. I'd rather. to see. the rise of skateboarding in general.

because he was so integral in keeping it. alive. at a time when it was struggling. um. through through sanctioning events. so I mean sure my own success yeah but. but I do feel like on a on a bigger. scale. in more lofty terms just the success of. skateboarding is something that. that. he would have been very proud of.

that that video game deal we all get. emails and these emails often contain. opportunities and sometimes we look at. these emails we're trying to figure out. if it's an opportunity or not sometimes. it looks like an opportunity sometimes. it's a waste of time sometimes it's just. someone yeah wanting a meeting to pick. your brain about something. um as you reflect on your decision now. in hindsight to proceed with that video. game was there any close calls. there was another group doing a game. that had contacted me.

and I. um. I went down the road with them a little. bit. and realized that what they were trying. to do was so much more. um how to how to explain it it was more. technically difficult to play. because they were trying to truly. emulate skating. and I felt like. I understood that approach but at the. same time Skating wasn't that big.

when we released this game or when we. were going to release this game and. I wanted something that would be more. friendly to the non-skater to play to. understand to be able to just pick up. and start doing tricks and when I saw. what Activision had they had a very. they had a very early version of a. skater doing tricks. the way it moved and and to me it was it. was. intuitive.

it was perfect it was like right away I. started playing it I started doing. tricks it was almost like it was it was. an extension of of my body to start. doing this on that screen with that. skater and it's something. innately felt right about it to me. and so uh was there a close call. I would say if Activision maybe had. called me a month or two later I might. have already linked a deal so. um but I felt very lucky on the.

commercial front I read that you'd been. offered a kind of a flat check. in well it when they were close to. launch of the game. they started to sense that there was. Buzz about it it was already getting. good reviews from from previews of the. the game Publishers I mean not the the. magazine Publishers so. they knew they had a good game overall. and they felt this this surge of.

interest and so they offered me a buyout. of future royalties right before the. game launched. um which at the time it was they offered. me a half million dollars and they said. you know I said what does that mean they. said well that that's you get that right. now and then no money going forward. and for me having lived through some. really lean times. when they say a half million dollars to.

me it sounds like a billion gazillion. dollars I mean it would no one had ever. spoken those types of numbers to me. before. um but I felt like I was in a pretty. good place I was I was doing well. in other ways I was I was still skating. a lot I was doing events I was um I had. good endorsements I was I was doing we. had birdhouse was starting to actually. be profitable my skate company and I had. just bought a new house with a with a.

not you know I had a loan but my loan. was manageable and I thought I'm gonna. take a risk because. I'm doing okay and I don't need that. money right now. and even the timing of that like if it. had been just a few months before that. when I was looking at houses maybe I. would have. taken that. um but I I didn't and that was. definitely the best financial decision. of my life. because that game was a success to say. that one and then the ones after it and.

the ones after it yeah how does one that. might not understand the scale of that. success quantify in a in a dollar amount. how many. how much revenue Tony Hawk Pro skates. are generated in its in its Legacy I I. mean I know that they they talk about a. billion dollars for Activision. um you know my take is not that. grandiose but I am never going to. complain it changed my life completely. a billion dollars they they generated in. sales. that that was that was always there.

they're a big buzz yes. so much I mean so much happens obviously. that that makes you financially. free. um for you know. but also you're you become like. the Michael Jordan of skating you are. you know I I was playing you on my video. game on the other side of the world when. I was. how old was I I'm gonna say eight. yes you know you become This Global icon.

of a sport and it's funny because I. didn't know skating before I knew the. video game. the video game was my way into to uneven. understanding that the sport existed and. I would play with my brothers that's a. that's going from zero to a thousand in. terms of no time for sure and and. um. that was never lost on me I mean I I. felt very lucky to have my name. synonymous with a video game and with. skateboarding uh because I had devoted. my life to it were you prepared for that. no.

no how could you prepare for anything. like that. there's no way I mean it it's it. to have that kind of success especially. in video games is reserved for someone. like Madden. or. Call of Duty or Grand Theft Auto I mean. it's you know to have it be your name. was wild and and. nowadays I mean we've come a long way we. did a remaster a couple years ago. there is a whole generation of of kids. I'm not kidding that have asked me if I.

was named after a video game foreign. wow. as you might know the show's now. sponsored by Airbnb I can't count how. many times airbnbs have saved me when. I'm traveling around the world whether. it's you know recently when I went to. the Jungle in Bali or whether it's when. I'm staying here in the UK or going to. business in America but I can also think. of so many times where I've stayed in a. host's place on Airbnb and I've been sat. there wondering could my place be an.

Airbnb as well and if it could be how. much could I earn it turns out you could. be sitting on an Airbnb gold mine. without even knowing about it maybe you. have a spare room in your house that. friends stay from time to time you could. Airbnb that space and make a significant. amount of money instead of letting it. stay empty that in-law that guest house. that Annex where your parents sometimes. stay you could Airbnb that and make some. extra income for yourself whether you. could just use some extra money to cover. some bills or for something a little bit.

more fun your home might be worth a. little bit more than you think and you. can find out the answer to that question. by going to airbnb.co.uk host. what would you what advice would you. have given yourself if you could have to. prepare yourself. if you could just whisp it in your ear. um I think I would have I would have. told my younger self to. work on. work on your state of mind and your.

priorities. um. with with equal effort as you do your. skating. I was so hyper fixated on my skating and. getting better at my success in skating. that. um I didn't really work on my Humanity I. mean in terms of my relationships and. and being present and and. maybe that's what it took to get that. far but I think I would just tell my. younger self like. to to figure out figure out how to.

function more as a human than just a. professional did you lose people. yeah. um and also gained people through. through my. um. changes and through my through finding. my priorities and I mean honestly like. I'm in a incredible place I'm happier. than I've ever been and I have much.

better relationships with my kids even. though most of them are adults and. I'm just more reliable. what is um what is skating without the. relationships like what is skating for. you so if you were to if I was to take a. you can escape forever you can carry on. doing your skating but I'm gonna take. away. the family and the meaningful. relationships what does life become then. um that doesn't sound as fun. foreign. it's. not the end-all for me anymore I love it.

and I'm going to keep doing as long as I. can and probably still push myself in a. lot of ways but. that is compartmentalized and it's when. I do it I'm all in on it and I'm doing. it and then I leave it there. I'm not just obsessing on it the rest of. the day I am I've I was speaking to a I. think a neuroscientist on this podcast. who told me that the brain actually. changes as we as we age up until about. 30 where I think for a male it roughly.

stops changing when we get to 30 I think. he he said to me. um and with that our priorities changed. so in our early 20s we're like trying to. get laid and like trying to do the. things that whatever and then as we get. into our 30s and and beyond our. priorities in life shift. um did you notice with age your priority. shift or was it the children. um. I think I just noticed that I was stuck. in a cycle. of compulsive behaviors. and something that that I didn't enjoy.

and didn't feel like it was helping me. to have good relationships with my. family with my kids and I think I just. took inventory and thought I gotta make. a a positive change and so it wasn't it. wasn't like my brain was changing and I. figured you know it was more that I had. to go get help lean into. therapy figure out how to process all. these things and how to how to move.

forward in a much more. congruent way with my values and. I was able to do it it took a while but. it was more into my 40s that that. happened. what did what did therapy help you to. realize about about yourself and why you. were exhibiting compulsive behaviors. did you ever figure out why. um yeah I think a lot of it was just. being afraid of intimacy and a lot of. that I'm not blaming my parents but. definitely I didn't have great examples. of it growing up.

so. um I had to figure that out and and and. how well how to be vulnerable I think I. was always very guarded. you and me both. it was I mean and also in those days of. having this sort of unwanted attention. made me more guarded because it was like. oh I can't. do any I can't say the wrong thing or do. the wrong thing and and it didn't allow. me to be myself very much and and I. think I'm much more comfortable in my.

own skin now and able to. able to to hold a more interesting. conversations. do you've got children now so do you you. know I often think about like. generational Cycles I think about the. like the intimacy or the emotional. expression that I didn't learn from my. parents and like an uh fear that I have. had hanging over me is that I might. replicate that for my children sure. accidentally yeah and and I I. was definitely worried about that like.

my dad never. never said I love you never professed. that kind of thing or or was warm in. that sense and so that was more my. example to live by and and through the. years and I was I was very much kind of. the same and. um at some point. let go of that. I still struggle with it now yeah you. know it's it's funny I again I've spoken. to lots of just sort of childhood. therapists Gabel mate and um they talk.

about like these different types of. traumas that we have in one of them is. called goblins near this Gremlins and he. talks about how goblins are usually. before the age of 10 years old and. they're very very hard to shake so they. always kind of. live there somewhere in us so even. sometimes saying being intimate now or. being vulnerable or saying I love you. it's like it's difficult. for me. I get that it's uncomfortable yes I'm. I'm starting to get much more at ease. with it though with practice. with practice Yeah.

and running the experiment I guess. yeah and also I see I see how it makes. my kids feel. it makes them feel seen and and loved. and and important. and it's particularly important as I've. come to learn if you want to have a good. relationship with a woman or man but. yeah. my girlfriend is very much the opposite. in terms of intimacy so it's kind of. it's an ongoing friction. what role has um your your wife played.

in the broader context of your. professional success. just a a feeling of well she's she's. just so grounded and she gives me a. sense of home. and she is very supportive but also has. her priorities intact so. when in in deciding what to get involved. with she's my sounding board. um and and she's the one who I trust the.

most with her opinion and. um. and she understands that that I am. challenged in terms of my sense of. intimacy and and how to navigate. fatherhood and she has been so great in. opening that up for me. um and helping to show me the the best. way to navigate it. um. and just the. she's not swayed by.

fanfare. at all. at all she could do away with it all. together. um and I love that and and I cherish. that. I guess that's what makes you feel like. home right that all the noise oh yeah. it's outside yeah absolutely I mean if. you catch us on a Saturday night we're. and a lot of times like our a couple of. our boys are in college one of them's in. college up here in La one of we have.

many children so. let's just say that sometimes they'll. come home for the weekend and as much as. we like seeing them if you catch us on. Saturday night they're downstairs. watching UFC fights with their homies. and we're upstairs hiding from everyone. and we're asleep by 9 pm that's pretty. much our big raging weekend. you know after you become the the icon. of a sport. um what does that do to your sense of. identity and I I I'm asking that. question because now everyone assumes.

they know you before they've met you. they kind of see you as this character. from a game. I think uh what you see is what you get. with me. I'm I'm not trying to present some other. persona and like I said in the past. maybe I was more guarded with who I was. or or how I was trying to be and now I I. think I'm just more much more natural. and much more real and. um this is it you know I'm super. thankful for what I get to do. I do not take this for granted at all.

and I know it could all be gone tomorrow. um but I'm going to seize opportunities. and do the best I can with it and and in. the meanwhile try to promote. skateboarding on a bigger level but. I know what you're saying and and. sometimes that is weird but at the same. time. I'm open to hanging out having a. conversation you know Bear Grylls yes so. Bear Grylls was the one that said to me. that when he he's almost become.

synonymous with like outdoor activities. like if your friends like eating some. mud you'd go you think you better grills. yeah whatever and he said something. interesting to me which has always. stayed with me he said the the bigger my. brand got the more self-doubt I got and. that's true that's kind of the Imposter. syndrome right. where uh you think like why me why is it. are you are they sure they got the right. guy. um and. I understand that but at the same time I. think I've I've been through enough. phases of success and failure to know.

that whatever is coming my way or. whatever it is that I'm putting out. there. um is real and is tangible. and. so the self-doubt is not as is more of a. whisper. success and failure you know you fail. every day in terms of. skating. some of the big big failures in your. life post the video game coming out.

because I think we've highlighted your. story to appear to be just success. success success success Big Break. success success what are some of those. big failures that have occurred over the. last decade that we might not have been. cognizant of um well I definitely have. had businesses that fail just because. they were either not the right time or. they were they were a little beyond my. expertise and I thought somehow because. I had other success I probably could do. well in other in other uh stages or. another spaces but I um I think it's.

failure yeah you know I've had failed. relationships and. um learned a lot from those and and was. able to to grow and and hopefully amend. my mistakes and and hurting people. um. and I think that uh. it's just a it's just a path of. evolution. um and so. I I mean I've always learned to embrace.

my mistakes with skateboarding and in a. sense I do that with my my regular life. too. but they embraced that the idea that I. grew from them. yeah yeah yeah. business there's a there's a business. behind you even still today you have a a. big team. um what is the the entrepreneurial side. of your life currently what are your. business ventures we have. um Hawk apparel. um which is Tony Hawk clothing.

um we have birdhouse skateboards. birdhouse apparel is actually its own uh. subsidiary uh with a group um with a. couple guys in Las Vegas that are doing. it which is super cool um I have the. skatepark project which is a foundation. for public skate parks in low-income. areas. um I'm part of a lot of different. Investments and Ventures. um things that I that I'm interested in. and. um. it kind of I can't say that it.

it Ebbs and flows some of them Ebbs and. flows but for the most part. um. there's been a crazy trajectory lately I. mean honestly it's it's even surprising. to me that that. um people are still interested in. what I do uh personally and also all the. all the ventures that I'm involved with. we um we have this new tradition on this. podcast Tony where we have these cards. and these cards are based on previous.

guests. um questions that they've left in the. book for the next guest so basically. every guest writes the question for the. next guest without knowing who it is. we've turned it into these conversation. cards and I'm gonna be honest you know. we've did this because listeners of this. podcast listen because they like. slightly deeper questions and context so. it allows them to play at home. um I have I think eight here. I'm gonna put them in front of you and. all you've got to do is pick one card. okay if you're willing to play and then. answer that question okay.

do you get QR codes do I have to scan no. it's okay the QR code just tells you who. answered it let's just answered it. let's see what are some words you've. never said to anybody why haven't you. said them and who should you have sent. them to. um. I think that I would. have told my wife even though I thought. that I was going to. um.

kind of turned my life around and change. my priorities uh I think that I would. have told her that I was I was really. frightened of the of the path or of. trying to make those changes and. um. I think she knew it but it probably. would have helped to confirm that with. with words and um and. I think maybe it would have given her. a better perspective on my.

vulnerabilities early on. um because when we first started dating. I was still kind of chaotic with with. what I was doing and and my approach to. my career and my life and everything and. and I made uh I made a conscious choice. to make a positive change and she knew I. was doing that but I don't think I let. on how. how. scary that was for me why why didn't you. tell her.

because I wanted her to think that I was. so. capable of it. and so confident with it. um. but you know what I mean she's too. intuitive she knew. yeah man women. this fight is funny you say that because. recently I've ran the experiment of. telling my girlfriend when I'm. struggling with something and I. literally told like I it was it felt. like an experiment because I was always. like tough guy like could never yeah you.

know I think I think that was it I was. always I was always guarded and also I I. managed to get this far. with how I was functioning. um I can't say it was it was the. smoothest but you know so I I had some. sense of control but uh I think it was. more to give up that control. was probably the the more scary thing. that I should have conveyed. um but. I feel like.

like I said I we we've come so far. especially you know we have a blended. family and uh our kids have a blast we. have a blast we we cherish our time with. them we cherish our time alone. and. um I think we have a really good. uh. I think we just have great communication. and uh. an intimacy so I you know she doesn't. like me talking about her so that's as.

far as I'm going to go with it I am I'm. right in my diary the other day that I. used to think vulnerability was um deep. down inside me like tough guy who didn't. really learn vulnerability from my. parents or anything I used to think. vulnerability was a repellent what I. came to learn right is that it's a. magnet yeah and that's when I say around. the experiment it's deep in me I thought. people would like run away or he's. weakies whatever and what happens is the. total opposite it's like you draw them. into you right I think I think what I. learned one of the one of the things I. learned early on is that The Bravery. actually means sharing your feelings.

yeah. which. doesn't seem to make sense. because one would think bravery was the. opposite but right I'm on that Journey. now in the Diary of a CEO we have. hundreds of questions that have been. left by our guests and we've put them. on these cards. and on these cards you have the question. that's been left in the diver CEO the. name of the person who wrote the. question and if you turn it over there's. a QR code if you scan that code you can.

see which guest answered the question. and watch the video of them answering it. every time I've done this podcast and. every time we've asked the kind of. questions we ask here I feel a. tremendous sense of affinity to the. guest and our aim with these cards is. that you can create that sense of. connection through vulnerability at home. with the people you love the most and I. have some good news for you as of today. you can add your name to the waiting. list to be the first in line to get your. own set of conversation cards at the.

conversationcards.com. the question that was actually left for. you um what have you done recently for. someone else nice easy one. um. uh I can't say Nintendo World what's. that you can't say Nintendo. Land isn't that enough. I uh well and I guess more materialistic. I bought my wife a new car as a surprise.

oh wow. um I think that uh whatever what did I. do for someone else probably on a bigger. scale. um. I bought a skateboard at an auction that. was a used skateboard that was hand. painted by Kurt Cobain. um for a guy he knew and the guy paid. him twenty dollars in a bag of weed to. paint a skateboard. this guy had held onto the skateboard. through the years because I think. because more because he was a hoarder.

um and dug it out of his storage not. long ago and said oh this is that board. that Kurt painted I should put it up for. an auction so I got wind of it I bought. it and. um through the help of Francis Kurt. Cobain's daughter. I I verified the authenticity of it and. recreated it. and so I recreated the skateboard. exactly photorealistic same shape and. everything and made 500 of them and the.

proceeds from those skateboard sales go. to half go to the Jed Foundation For. Suicide Prevention and half go to the. skatepark project for public skate parks. that's so cool um so I feel like today. what I do I'm hoping that I did. something for people to either. for those struggling with mental health. or for and also for those who want a. place to skate and that's so cool at.

last check uh We've sold 300 of them. 300 out of the 500. I'm going to buy one. I would appreciate it yes I'm gonna buy. one I'll buy one today what do I buy and. then for you to answer then that would. be your answer would I do help people. shout out reissue how do I buy one or uh. Tony hawk.com. um in the in the store don't. amazing Tony listen thank you so much. for. um coming here today it's surreal to. meet you because you were you know you. still are an icon in my eyes because you.

know it's crazy that I'm I'm from a. little Countryside Village on the other. side of the world and I was born in. Africa and I was playing you on a game. your game when I was just a young kid. and so cool you're the reason why as I. said earlier you're the reason why I. thought skateboarding was cool and I had. an interest in it but the reason why at. 12 years old I actually got a skateboard. I was never able to skate I fell off a. couple of times I quit I'm gonna be. honest yeah but I bought the board and I. had an interest in the sport because of. you and your legacy and it's a legacy. you continue to to create in many ways. to do business and through your. philanthropic Endeavors so thank you and.

thank you for your humility you know. it's very easy to see how someone like. you might be off in the clouds but from. everything I've seen all the research. I've done you're it seems like you've. been seemingly untouched and I guess. maybe from what you said your wonderful. partner and your family deserves some. credit for that because they oh for sure. you know you've been a grounding Force. thank you so much time yeah thank you. thanks for having me. quick word from one of our sponsors I. have to say I've been on a bit of a. journey with this brand because when I. started my business in new territories. when we first moved social chain to the. to New York City the first place we went.

to was wework we moved four of our team. members out to New York City and we. built the business from there. um I have to say there's something. magical about weworks I've spent the. last two or three weeks in LA in a wee. work and as you walk in the front door. every day it's almost like that sense of. community that sense of magic excitement. camaraderie is tangible and you don't. get that when you're working at home you. don't get that often when you're sat in. your bed on your laptop there's. something about getting out and getting. into a wee work that makes me feel a.

sense of Entrepreneurship and and. creativity and building and the way that. we work to design both both in the way. that they offer subscriptions so that. you can work you know on demand but also. the the flexibility of the contracts. means that it's just the perfect place. for businesses to scale their companies. and if you haven't checked out where you. work and you want to you can go to we. dot Co slash CEO and there you can get. 50 off at trial day at wework close to. you I've now been a fuel Drinker for.

about four years roughly so much so that. I ended up investing in the company. um and I play a role on the board of the. company but they also very kindly. sponsor this podcast and to be honest. I've never said this before but he all. believed in this podcast before anybody. else the CEO Julian. um told me before we even launched the. podcast how successful it would be and. that heel would back it and I absolutely. have a huge amount of gratitude for them. for that support but an even greater. sense of gratitude for the fact that. they've helped me stay nutritionally. complete throughout the chaos and. hecticness of my tremendously busy.

business schedule so if you haven't. tried out here which I hope most of you. have at least given it a go by now try. it out it's an unbelievable way to try. and stay nutritionally on course if you. have a hectic busy schedule and let me. know what you think send me a tweet and. a DM tag me let me know what you think.