"SNL" Alums Keep Hurting John Mayer's Feelings | Conan O'Brien Needs A Friend

I want to ask a. question and it's a it's not a. rhetorical question and it's not a. criticism why do you think it is that. there's a great that the largest P the. largest community of people who have. hurt my feelings at parties over the. years have been uh related to SNL oh is. that true oh yeah okay what is it about. the SNL experience and I'm being very. open-minded about it because it's it.

can't be this sort of ad hoc thing where. everyone at SNL is just a little. pathological what goes on at SNL is that. the fraternity that when you do see. someone from SNL at a. party I you know I'm talking first of. all talk I want to go into a little bit. of I want to do a little bit of. forensics before I proceed uh which is. how most comedians talk. uh make sure you're fully anesthetized. you don't have to name names but are you. talking about performers both and.

writers no not not writers as much. performers it's it perform let's just. say performers okay right I don't want. to get too specific and it's not evil. it's not pointedly to you it feels. almost reflexive it feels like a. coldness CU I'm open I show up open and. I show up with the weird expectation. other people are going to meet me there. yeah and there is this sort of pull away. this sort of if it's almost like someone.

on SNL has a difficult time pretending. to be interested if they're not does. that does that check out uh I think I. think it's a a couple things uh I mean. it depends I wouldn't make a blanket. statement about like all I don't mean to. I don't want I'm just saying because of. the people who I've left going I feel. like I. hyperextended and I fell in front of. them or that they walked away and. weren't interested have is that just my. love of SNL uh well possibly I think. there is something in common and and and.

maybe it's particular to SNL because. it's you know it's a two-way street here. first of all is this wouldn't happen to. you if you didn't put maybe SNL on a. pedestal so so part of the problem is. maybe you putting uh other people on a. pedestal that's where I've been uh. sometimes hurt before there is a thing. um which is too there's a too cool for. school philosophy that can Thrive at SNL. I've known obviously wonderful great. people there but it is not um one of the.

things I think that makes SNL actually. really good uh or has helped it endure. all these years is that there's a. limited amount of real estate to get. stuff on the show and you think about it. it's really dictated by it's a live show. so there's only so much physical real. estate in studio 8h and they can only. get so much show on every week and there. is a competition to get your sketch on.

and so at the end of the day you're. competing with other people in the room. now that's just the way the show is set. up. and uh I saw a love a lot of lovely. collaboration when I was there and uh. you can also see a very you know. competitive someone giving you putting. their shoulder into yours like it's. hockey and you think Jesus what's this. SNL is a very specific. environment uh and I think it's.

possible that it there's a kind of maybe. toughness there that it can bre does. that make sense to you I wonder if it. was because they're so deep in the. trenches together that if you're not. someone they recognize From The. Trenches you can kind of feel it if like. to your point if they weren't huddled. together in ADH having this experience. that is so bonding with the people who. are either writing for the show weekly. or like friend of show mhm that or I.

represent something kind of anti-comedy. because I'm the tall musician guy or. something I can't quite figure it out. but I hope this is more interesting than. it feels like an indictment or me. talking it's not an indictment of SNL. it's an it's like this is an experience. that you've had where you felt like. you've. encountered Comedians and that's a tough. place that's a that's a that's a that's. not always the most comfortable. terrarium and anyone who worked at SNL. would tell you that um so I would.

contrast it say with there are other. shows I've worked on like The Simpsons. where the only way the show gets done is. if everybody works together and so if if. this room right now is a Simpsons. Writing Room I'd be praying if we were. stuck on a line for Marge I would be. praying that you came up with it or Matt. or Sona or Edward I'd be like thinking. oh my God someone get it because then we. can go home right and that wasn't always.

the way at SNL because it was SNL felt. more like I joined the Marines and it. was really scary and I got yelled at and. I had to do push-ups check out you know. and then but I say that with a huge. caveat because I've heard I've talked. about SNL before and I think sometimes. it's been misrepresented I loved that. job and that job changed my life and I. learned a ton there and I wouldn't. change a thing so at the same time so. it's both it's both and mark the out.

point where we would edit this because I. I don't I sometimes my curiosity making. my job easier. yeah sometimes my curiosity sounds like. this very kind of shrouded criticism of. something but it's really what is it but. can I say something else that is I'm on. I'm on Conan's podcast and he asked me. if he could say something. else permission granted I'm sorry I just. remembered you playing buckets of rain. and. I my penis went up inside my.

lungs come on which is quite a void by. the way you had you had a penile. embolism yeah I did my doctor's like. what's this doing in here and my penis. is like there's so much. oxygen this is fantastic oh my God but. uh okay I'm GNA tell you I have had the. exact same and I'm not a big believer in. naming names but there are certain. comedians who are my generation or uh. maybe little older than me just a little.

bit old but certain comedians that come. from standup specifically who I've met. over the years and they have left me. feeling that way yeah not broken not. destroyed but huh okay I you you know. when you have an interaction with. somebody and you leave and you just have. your body knows before your mind does so. I leave the interaction and I feel like. when you sometimes you bump into and. this is just not talking about famous. people talking to famous people blah. blah blah this is about talking to other. being sometimes you bump into someone.

and you leave and you feel like you've. been nourished you just have this nice. uh really nice feeling and um you just. feel lifted and I'm only I'm mentioning. a name right now because I just randomly. ran into them the other day but I saw it. was in a restaurant and I'm walking out. and Tom Hanks is there and anytime I. bump into that guy I leave with this. tingly he does something Santa Claus.

that makes me feel like you know that. old way of like yeah he actually he gave. me a candy. cane which I found creepy by the way uh. he tried to lure me to his. van no but um you know he was there with. Rita and I just I just felt I left and I. felt like it wasn't like a oh my God. that was Tom H because I've you know. worked with him and done a bunch of. things with him over the years and. interviewed him it was more just that he. was so funny and he I could see like saw. me as a person and we had this nice.

moment and I left and I he made me feel. better and he does that for everybody he. does that for the person who's changing. the O in his car as if he goes. himself I've seen it I mean I've seen. him do it it's a magic you know and. people talk about that but he's he's you. know really beautiful that way but these. people I'm talking about these other. people who will go unnamed have just. I've had interactions with them and when. I leave I always feel like they've just. taken just there's like a little bit of. on their finger and they put it on.

my for like smeared it on my forehead so. specific yeah and you know what well and. also I realized later on they did do. that con they are very specific people. who put they put their hand their finger. up their ass and then they anoint you. they do it like ash you know it's true. it's like Ash Wednesday but with. you may not be able to play the guitar. like you want to but you are a born. Lyricist that's why we're going to write. a song Oh finger Jones is going to. be all I know is that it's in e.

um but uh but. finger have you heard the DECA box set. of. finger oh some of the deep cuts are. fantastic he has a urine phase which is. not good but I it's acoustic well he. went that's when he went to Austria and. had and his Bowie thing it was the 70s. he couldn't get arrested in the states. he ended up in Austria under the. Alligator Records imprint.

but all I'm saying is that there is. always way by the way real quickly it is. such a great metaphor for someone who. has a great thing going with finger. Jones and then one day goes what about. piss yeah and then everybody goes we. don't like the piss thing we like to use. the thing which is met we tried we. have tapes we can play for you it didn't. work we tried piss the label the label. came to him and said it's all about piss. now yeah when you put urine on someone. they don't always know that it was. urine feel like sweat yeah. it's going back it's going back it's.

regressive and that is Tik Tok but. exactly in a world of I'm being. sold piss but but um there's your lyric. right there just cut me in for. 1% but John but John seriously seriously. like I have that is the exact feeling. I've had with these people and may have. again where there's like a little bit of. a Condes and I feel like I extended. myself and tried to be hey the puppy dog. and then left and I'm driving home and I.

just feel a little small a little. deflated a little two dimensional and I. think that's uh that's everybody so. here's what I think it comes down to. certain people are nourishers and. certain people can give energy and other. people defend their energy and I think. I'm a nourisher I want to I want to show. up with another person who's going to. meet in the middle we're going to give. give give give give if you're not that. way and I shouldn't expect everyone to. be that way I know that I'm I'm not rare. but it's it's not everybody who thinks.

like I think which is wow how can I give. to this experience how can I like I'm. saying looking up to people who aren't. me wanting to give to people who aren't. me other people who can do that with you. it's the greatest jam out in the world. but not everyone has that other people. survive by way of preserving what energy. they have not giving it in hopes the. other person's going to give it back and. I think that's the polarity issue right. with comics and we don't have to name. anyone it's also sometimes musicians but. musicians are more of a closed loop in. what makes them happy and where their. validity comes from their validation.

comes from so if a giver is talking to. someone who's a Defender yeah then it. that's when The Giver leaves going but I. don't think the defender leaves going. was I a little cold no I think no no. they don't they're not concerned about. it and there are people and I'm again. we're not we're talking about a very. specific thing comedy show business but. there just people out in the world where. my best analogy is the six sense I'm. around these people and before I even. see them I can see my breath suddenly I.

couldn't see my breath before but now I. can see my breath and then I turn around. and that person is standing right there. you know so let me ask you this question. knowing that if you can predict that. especially with certain people will you. give less as a self- protection yeah I. will not only give less but I will also. say Life's too short I don't think I'll. go to that party I think I choose not to. interact with and we're all we're. talking about Pat s uh let's put it on.

the table but I've learned with certain. people I mean he literally put on. my forehead and you can see it on the. wheel on the wheel you can see on the. wheel it's how they Mark the wheel it's. how you cheat it's how you cheat wheel. forun he always puts it he the there's a. little bit of right near them it's. like marking cards yes no seriously look. at Wheel of Fortune closely you'll see a. little bit of it goes like this. take and see John can hear it cuz has a. musician's ear very it's.

very. slish I saw a piece of corn fly off the. wheel once I swear to God and they cut. to say Jack and he was eating corn on. the cob he was and he said Chomp Chomp. we got a real good show for you today. who the eats corn on the cob on. television on television well he's. hosting a game show anyway he'll get his. you'll get yours say Jack.

oh man s ja is somewhere and someone's. telling him Conan really outed you on. the show for onto your hand and. rubbing it on the wheel or or he goes. out to go to the supermarket and. everyone's yelling at him cornman hey. cornman he doesn't know why man on. the wheel lately or he goes they found. me out yes yes that's what he does. somewhere at stck like no how does he. know.