Q&A: How Conan Would Ruin Matt Gourley’s Favorite Movies | Conan O'Brien Needs A Friend

hi um I'm a teacher I'm a middle school. teacher what is your name Tyler hey. Tyler how are you I'm very good how are. you you're done pretty good thank you. good good thanks a lot next question all. right you're a middle school teacher. good for you I love teachers there is. currently a substitute teacher in my. classroom and if you were the substitute. teacher I want to know what sort of. lesson you would do how would you uh. entertain the children well how would. you spend the day okay. um uh I get this rap it's like oh he's.

so needy and he needs to try and make. everybody laugh and it's uh absolutely. true um when my kids were little there. was this thing and you've probably seen. this where they get the parents to come. in and read to the class and so they. give you the book you can't choose the. book so I came in one day and my. daughter is like. six and I'm just going to read this very. normal unfunny children's book.

and I'm reading the book and then I. realize that there's like a little. stuffed animal behind my head and then. if I push my head back the little. Bunny's head will flip forward and so I. start working the head and then whipping. around like the bunny is and the kids. start laughing really hard and I then I. start doing stuff with more animals and. then I stop reading the book and I'm. doing bits for the kids with the animals. and the teacher look came over to me and. whispered in my ear just read the book.

and I got home and I told my wife I was. killing I was destroying and she was. like they're six what the is your. problem I think the problem would be I. I've always thought that would be a. detriment to me my being a teacher is. that I might need to to get some laughs. would start to interfere with the fact. that I'm supposed to be teaching them uh.

um about safe sex or. something and you know or whatever some. important thing they need to know that. would get clouded over uh and um and and. maybe the children would get in the way. I might alter if I was teaching history. I might alter history so it was a little. funnier maybe Lincoln's chasing Booth up. the street you know I would just do. these things that I think would probably. get me in trouble so uh I think it's. probably a good thing that I'm not. teaching at your school but I I do.

applaud that you're doing it I think. it's it's good and um I think that would. be a disaster if I was a substitute. teacher maybe just for one day and then. kids would leave and say what a what a. sad lonely old woman that was hi Conan. hey how are you I'm good um what's your. name Calvin hey Calvin uh me and my. brother loved you growing up so thank. you for kind of shaping our weird if you. could talk to his mother I I I figured. because she my mother enjoyed you just. fine I don't know got to talk to this.

woman um but my question is um you were. a writer for The Simpsons way back uh. big fan of The Simpsons as well but uh. what is like advice you usually give to. up andc coming especially comedy writers. in this business um my advice is uh. start by picking something you really. love maybe that they're making right now. and then write in that style um so.

um Tim Robinson's show uh really makes. me laugh I'm I'm always looking for who. are the the young people that are making. stuff that really makes me laugh and I. think if I was a writer today I would. probably and up and coming without a job. I might say okay I'm going to. write um a bunch of those sketches and. see if I can get them it doesn't mean. necessarily I'll get a job on Tim. Robinson but they might find somebody. else but let's say you love Abbot.

Elementary write an episode of the you. know watch the show write it find out. what the format is so that you're right. so that if someone gets their hands on. it it's in the correct format it's it it. it looks like a real script I'm always. blown away over the years when I see. when we were looking for somebody to. help us out and someone would show me. well this packet just came in and if I. saw on the first page two things that we. could do that night I mean steal it and. not pay them no um like two sketches.

that oh my God I could see myself doing. this right now my attitude was always. get this person in here let's get them. get them. because um it's a very powerful thing. when somebody. uh um is everybody's always looking for. good material and there's a lot of stuff. out there that is lazy or the person. hasn't it's not in the right format or.

it's not a good idea but um write what. you would want to see do you know what I. mean just be aspirational about it this. is a sketch that would really make me. laugh if someone saw it this is an. episode of a TV show uh that um this is. that would really make me howl if I saw. it write that write for yourself make. yourself happy and chances are that's. going to make someone else happy don't. don't change yourself too much to try.

and fit another. show this guy didn't get a chance let's. give him a chance right there thank you. so much I appreciate because I know he's. going to give me money at the end of. course of course Coten Bobby I have a. question for you that's very. professional look at the way he did that. everybody you call in to radio shows a. lot don't you of course hey con Bobby. question my name is link by the way nice. to meet you nice to meet you too um on. the I'm trying to be as crisp and. efficient as you Bobby what you got. let's go on the podcast Matt Gurley has. stated that he loves.

the James Bond and Indiana Jones. franchise yeah if you could ruin one for. him which one would it be and why if I. could what if you could ruin one of them. for ruin yeah which one would it be and. how wow that's really good oh I know. what I would do I would ruin James Bond. for him because I think he truly loves. Bond the most and I would ruin it by. becoming the next James. Bond and I would wear that wig over my. hair and totally ruin the. franchise I just you know what I mean.

I'd say my name's. Bond. Bond and I turn into Nixon everything. that would just make him not sexy not. cool my fights would be a lot of. slapping and. shrieking then they would just end the. franchise they would never make another. James Bond after that and that would. destroy it for uh for gorle and also. radioactively uh destroy all the ones. that came before it and I would make. sure that I was put into scenes in the. in the previous James Bonds where I just.

lean in and go how's it going just. totally take you out of the movie I want. to destroy gor's life thank you I would. watch that thank you for that idea.