Matt Gourley Tests Conan & Sona’s Knowledge Of Trucker Slang | Conan O'Brien Needs A Friend

I was cleaning out some stuff in my. office the other day and I found that I. had this CB dictionary. Oh my god. To. make sure that we annunciate CB. Yeah. What is it? Sounded a little bit like CD. for a second. Oh, CB. Citizens Band. Radio, which is the way people talk like. truckers and smoking the banner. You. know, we've talked about that movie. before. Yeah. And not just the movie. I. remember very clearly there was a the. CB fad was huge in the late '7s and. there was a song called Convoy. You.

remember that song? I do. CJ McCall. Yeah. And we got a little old convoy. running through the night. We got a. great big convoy. Ain't she a beautiful. sight convoy? Sona, where you going? What's going anyway? It was a big deal. and I remembered that um one of my. grandparents passed away and some of us. wrinkle pages even louder. What are you. uh Oh my god, look at him. He's right. This is the guy who produces the. podcast. I cut my mic. You don't need to.

worry about it. You look at this. What. are you, Chris Crinkle? Um anyway, why'. you laugh so hard? That wasn't that. funny. I thought it was good. as long as. Chris's not good. You heard of Chris. Cringle. This guy's Chris Crinkle. Louder, Blle. Louder. There you go. Suck. up. So anyway, one of my grandparents. passed away and we were all like kids. and we were for some reason it got. switched around. So we were in the. funeral. procession, you know, uh funeral.

procession, you know, there's the what's. it called? The in the cars procession. Is it the funeral procession with the. cars? I think so. Okay. Anyway, it's a. convoy. Hurse was driving um with one of. my grandparents in it. I can't remember. which one. And then other cars and like. our our cool cousin was driving the. station wagon that my brothers and I and. my sisters and I were all jammed into. And we're headed to the graveyard when. the song Convoy came on and my cousin.

reached over and turned it up all the. way. And there's a part of the song. where they go, "So let them tuckers roll. 10 four cuz we got a great thing." And. we were all rocking out and I love my. granddad, but I and it felt sacriiggious. but also great at the same time. So I. have a grandad. No, he wouldn't have. liked that at all. Well, I thought I could quiz you guys on. CB lingo and see if you can figure it. out because actually speaking of hearse, there is a CB term for hearse. Anybody. know what it is? Uh, is it called an old.

rolling pine? The the dead guy. Uh, the dead guy. The. dead guy. Uh, the dead guy. No. Yeah. Let's see. I remember that. Well, obviously a Smokey is a policeman. So, we'll go over. First of all, a hearse is. called a bone box. Bone box. We got a. bone box. Here. Here are just some of. your regular things like the police are. called You could call them a Smokey or a. bear. Smokey the bear. CB radio are your. ears. Mhm. Um, got my ears on. A bear in. the air. A bear in the air is a is a. whirly big whirly gig. It's a It's a.

helicopter with a with the cops inside. A police helicopter. Yeah. Oh my. god. Is it a policeop? A helicopter with police inside. It's a helicopter, but instead of a. citizen contained. within, at the core of it are police. Um, this is this is what truckers say to. each other when they're driving long.

range semi drivers. Okay. Okay. Like a. bear in the bush. Bear in the bush is. Oh, that would be a smokey that's hiding. out trying to catch people in a speed. trap. Yeah, that's exactly right. Now, I'm going to quiz you guys. Those are. kind of the just the easy ones. All. right, here we go. Blood box. Blood box. would be ambulance. That's right. One. persona. Okay. Bed bug hauler. Bed bug. hauler. It would be a motel. Like a. cheap motel. I think it's a furniture. truck. A moving van. I'll accept that.

I'm getting my ass. I just learned what. this was. Bikini State. Bikini State is. Florida. That's right. Oh, I just know. cuz I'm a bikini inspector. Looking at. the Are you No, I was No, I was not. looking at it. I was not I don't have my. glasses on either. Sorry. Breaking wind. Go uh speeding going downhill. I'm. sorry. Neither of you. It's the first. seer in a convoy. Okay. They're breaking. the wind. All right. Brush your teeth. and comb your hair. That's something. you'd say. What does it mean? That's. just I mean good hygiene. Yeah. I think.

that means I need to rest. No, brush. your teeth. It helps when you think of. it like 10 for four, good buddy. Brush. your teeth and comb your hair. Um, be a. good See you. around. Brush your teeth and comb your. hair. There's a there's a smokey up. ahead. What? What? Look, look good. There's a smokey up ahead. Well, that's. stupid. See you around. Just say there's. a smokey up ahead. Why brush your teeth. and comb your hair? Well, that's the. whole point. They could be listening, right? The policeman doesn't when when. they when they pull you over for. speeding, they don't care about your.

attire and how well quacked you are. The. Smokies are listening in on the CB radio. and then they hear if you say, "Hey, there's a Smokeoky." They'll be like, "Oh, the convoy is smart." What are. California turnarounds? On ramps, no, off. ramps. Way stations. California. turnaround. Yeah. Uh that's when you hit. the state of California cuz you've made. your drop and then you're headed back. the other way. Not really. They're they're benzo or. speed because if you're going as far as.

California, you got to take some of. those to go there and back. Oh, I see. You mean like a Benny or a big uh Yes, I. said benzo. Yeah, Benny. Yeah, Benny or. a Jub. Yeah, you guys are real hip. Those are called uh green a green. Squanto. Yeah. Choke and puke. What's. that? Choke and puke. Choke and puke. Uh. let's see. Tighten her up. That's in. Smoky the Bandit. They they use that a. lot. Choke and puke. Yeah, I'm going to. a choke and puke. Going to a choke and puke. Going to a.

choke and puke. Like a bad diner. It's a. restaurant, but I'll give it to you. Thank you. Okay. Christmas card. Um, just like a way to wish people well. You use it in a sentence, please. I'm doing double nickels on the I5. And. I got myself a Christmas card. I'm going. to have to pay that come Tuesday. Uh, traffic ticket. That's right. But why. was it called a Christmas card? Well, it's just poetry. It's CD poetry. I'm. sorry. I'm I'm glad. You know what? There's a reason this died out. You know. what I mean? They had bad terms. I'm.

sorry. Oh my god. I'm. Now we're going to get into some of the. more colorful ones. Yeah. What's the. score? I'm winning. It's three Sona. Conan 2. Also, we don't know that this. died out. There's There's truckers all. over this place. Yeah. Why don't they. just email each other or text? Cuz you. don't want to be on your phone on the. while you're driving. Of course, they. can be on their phone. They have devices. that handle all kinds of things while. they're driving. Let's get to that. What. do you think vacuum suck is for? Well, I have one. I'm using it now. Oh,

man. What does it mean? Three AA batteries. takes care of old Captain Jack down. there. Jesus. Captain Jack. Captain. Jack. What does abuse it mean? Um, well, okay. Say it. Well, um I don't want to. masturbate. That's right. Sona get I. gave that to Sona cuz I didn't want to. offend a lady. Did you masturbate? I. didn't. No, you just called your dick. Captain Jack. Yeah, he's in the army.

That's his rank. You just did a whole. vacuum. It's his rank. I got a vacuum suck for Captain Jack. He. did his time. Well, you don't want to. say masturbate, but he was in Vietnam. What's a douche job? Oh man, don't get. me started. A douche job. is when um Why did you put two fingers. up very specific? Car wash. Yes, that's. right. Ah, okay. I was going to say an.

actual. like anal. No. An actual anal. Okay. Some of these have crossed over. into popular culture, but what's a. beaver? A vagina. Well, no. I mean, it's. a woman driving. Just a woman. Yeah. Okay. Brabbuster. What is it? Brabbuster. Brabbuster. Oh, man. Talk. about it. Excuse me. What? Talk about it. I have. no idea. Brabbuster is a woman who is.

real tough. No. Bra Buster is a speed. bump. No. You go over it too fast, it's. going to bust your bra. No, it's just a. large rested woman. Well, wait a minute. How does that I thought they have to. relate to trucking somehow. Now you're. going to get into Yeah, he's that's an. old itchy face. What's that? A guy with. a beard. Well, why are they talking in. code? No one's changing the goalpost. No, if I'm driving a truck and I see, you.

know, lady with the titties, I go, "Hey. guys, brab buster." That beaver's a real. bra buster. That's not It's not coded. enough. Oh, it's still, you know what I. mean? Some of them are. Some of them. aren't. I mean, this is this just. evolved with the language. It's not like. somebody sat down at it. No, but there's. a more clever way to do that if there's. a large breasted woman. Well, maybe it's. not like they're doing it on the radio, but the woman doesn't hear it. They're. just like, "Hey guys, heads up." Those. are some big knobs on the radio. Yes. You know what I mean? Something like. that. That's nice. You know, high beams.

on. So, something they could do better. The. twin pillars of society. There's so many different ways to do it, but busters just being unimaginative. Another reason why CB culture has died. All right. So, this is a tiebreaker. Uh, and the last one, coffee break. Coffee. break. Oh, tell me about it. I'm just. trying to use up time. Coffee break. Um, coffee break. This doesn't like. necessarily have a onetoone for what the. name is to what the thing is. So, you.

just have to think creatively. Remember, we're in the kind of like, you know, sexual section of this. Oh, we are. Oh, coffee break. Does it have anything to. do with um this one's anal? Oh my god, you're obsessed. And again, they have a device for that, too. So. they didn't have to. cuz dark. Oh god. No. Not only are you. not right, you're disqualified. Yeah. Thank you. Coffee break. Um I don't. know. I I It's just a visit with a.

prostitute. But why? That's just I'm. taking a coffee break. It's a You can't. get upset. These are I can get upset. I want these to be I want these to be. rewritten. Well, the good news is I've. only gone through A through D on these, so we've got lots more to do. Oh my god. That's okay. I think this is our last. visit to C. What made you Why do you. have a CB dictionary? That was my. question. Yeah. Just I don't know. Maybe. someone gave it to me as a gift or I. bought it. I you know, I love the movie. Smoking the Bandit. It's one of my. favorite movies. So, I wanted to I.

wanted to be able to speak the the the. PWA. Oh, God. Jesus Christ. Okay. Well, if you're going around saying coffee. break or bra buster, I just I can't. know. I think some of these could be. better. 1010 in the shade, Pickle Park, and Tailor Made. So, see, that's that. sounds good. But some of these just. weren't very good. I'm going to be. honest. Coffee break for a prostitute. There's a better way to do that, right? I think coffee break. What? I think. coffee break coffee break. It's a. euphemism. And but what I'm saying is.

that's a bad idea because coffee is a is. a regular part of what a trucker would. be drinking and they would want No, that's not that's a terrible thing to. say. Why are you telling other people. that you're going on a coffee break? Like why are you telling the other. people on the radio that you're going to. see a prostitute? Why don't you just do. it? I think you don't you guys got to. put yourself in the mindset of the 70s. in the American South and you're just. talking to your buddies on a CB radio. going, I'm gonna go on Coffee Break 104. Come back. Come on. Let's say I'm going.

to go hire a prostitute and then I'm. going to have some coffee afterwards. with said prostitute. Uh my old college. roommate Tom Crow. Jesus. Who is that? He came out of nowhere. Hey, what's your. handle there, good buddy? I shut the up. Snow cap. Yeah. No. Uh no. My my my old college roommate Tom. Crow. His sister her job is coordinating. uh long haul truckers. I can ask her how. much of these are still in use today. because she talks to a lot of truckers. Sounds good. Yeah. Find out if there are. a lot of truckers out there taking.

coffee breaks. And you know what? This. segment really wants a follow-up. segment. Okay. Yeah. It screams. followup. And ask her about vacuum suck. Is that the Is that the actual name? Is. that the actual name from the guy who. won't say masturbate? Okay. No, I can't. do it myself. But with machinery.