Matt Gourley's Birthday Gift Got Lost In The Mail | Conan O'Brien Needs A Friend

welcome to Summer chores and uh hey you. okay uh-huh oh my God we're not even not. not that much time has elapsed and. um I'm worried about Sona most of all. you should be you should because she is. drinking a powerful rum drink Matt how. are you doing you said summer chores. instead of summer summer chores with. Kobe and the okay we're doing this. podcast don't you see. I don't think anyone said don't you see.

since about. 1944. don't you see we must win World. War II the best part is listeners you. can go to YouTube and check out all. kinds of clips from this series yeah if. you're if hearing about it doesn't annoy. you enough yeah and you want to see this. total meltdown of us outside on this. nice Veranda do you want to see the. three hottest people that you've ever. seen in your life so sexy I'm. wearing a bikini the size of a doily.

yeah what are you doing with the cord. yeah I'm doing unibrow. you're doing crazy for the. people okay hey YouTube people hey. YouTube this is house sonar YouTube oh. you look fantastic you look amazing. thank you ah let me see you point it to. me whoa well I think the important thing. is that we're here we're together uh and. two of you are wasted I'd like to point. out that I'm a very thoughtful person.

a very thoughtful person busted you. little Dandy yeah no I am not I blame. the microphone which is a Krieger which. is not the German brand I prefer it is. schluten dyden anyway I knew that it was. your birthday coming up and I tried very. hard to get you a wonderful this is for. you Mr Matt Gourley yes I tried to get. you the perfect gift I conspired I went.

online and I found this place that would. sell me. mid-century vintage cocktail glasses. that looked like pineapples because they. have like a copper top they're really. cool looking and they have a built-in. straw and I thought oh my God this is so. matte girly and it's also so summer. s'mores I tried I ordered these things. and paid for them and now I would like. David hopping to enter the scene because. David I think you could maybe explain.

David is my assistant who really does. things as opposed to Sona who pretends. to do things anyway. [Music]. so David does your day-to-day Assistant. duties and I do big picture. when I'm planning uh to launch. satellites my purchase of you know what. I have to say when I tried to outbid.

Elon Musk for Twitter Sona was. instrumental. big picture but anyway uh do us a favor. yeah and tell us Mr hopping what's the. status because first of all take us. through it because we've talked about. this before but I ordered these glasses. and it was really excited for them to. come and then they weren't showing up. and then you told me there was a problem. and then you said an investigation has. been yeah it's kind of exciting oh a. little bit let's hear about it. um so they're not here that's pretty.

exciting that's my favorite part of the. story they're missing. um I did check earlier and now it says. that a uh claim has been filed and it. now it says that I need to contact the. seller so basically we ordered these. from like not eBay but like in eBay it's. like I mean like in eBay so it's like. from a seller FB like I was like. messaging the girls room but it's called. Sapp dot com and. uh yeah it's not good Governor Brian. needs a friend is brought to you by.

T-Mobile from listening to your favorite. podcast while driving cross country to. listening at home T-Mobile helps you. stay connected I wonder what people's. favorite podcast is oh I've got some. ideas actually it's one idea yeah you'll. figure it out T-Mobile is America's. largest and fastest 5G Network you can. have seamless video calling oh that's. good streaming your favorite podcast I'm. not gonna say which one it is yeah. downloading apps games boy you know what. a gamer I am you're such a gamer play.

starbursters yeah or realm of Thanos. you can watch your favorite TV episodes. classic Conan new Conan old Conan. mid-season Conan as long as it's Conan. oh no find out more at tmobile.com. Network fastest based on media and. overall combined 5G speeds according to. analysis by UCLA the speed test. intelligence data for q1 2023 c5g device. coverage and access detail t-mobile.com. she seems really nice though can I ask.

you a question yeah my money has gone. through. yes yes so you're out of pocket at this. so I am out of pocket and and David just. be perfectly honest these weren't cheap. no okay so I am out of pocket this. amount of money and yet right now we're. just chairing these vague claims that. there's an investigation right like we. can see every step of the journey the. package went on like it went from. Connecticut to New Jersey to something. called Bell California that sounds nice.

um that's been it was out for delivery. and then just vanished now what is that. in in your opinion David I know that. you're a very good detective what do you. think happened to the glasses if you had. to guess do you think someone stole them. along the way or do you think it's an. innocent accident I mean I don't want to. accuse anyone of stealing but I think. they were stolen let's be clear the real. tragedy is I've turned 50 years old and. I am weeks without gift yeah and I'll.

tell you I don't know how much longer I. can hold on yeah well first of all it's. not just without gift you're weeks. without Twee cocktail glasses exactly. from the 1950s my reason for living yeah. exactly uh this is. um an injustice has been done good money. has been spent you know how hard I work. yeah and how uh much I deserve the money. that I make and you know that this is a. crime this is a terrible crime against a. great American who has brought laughter.

to people for 30 years makes it about. himself when do we expect a resolution. yes thank you David oh you know what. Matt I apologize I did momentarily make. it about myself yeah and I'm sorry and I. just want you to know that Conan O'Brien. is sorry for the loss of the glasses. that Conan O'Brien when can we expect a. resolution for your services. two days ago and we there's no update. what investigation there's no. inspections. investigating the UPS is investigating.

themselves so UPS oh this is ridiculous. you know what I'm sorry David I don't. want to throw you under the bus but I. would pretend that this happened if I. forgot to order something and then I. would have. I would pull them up but then everyone. would see how much you paid picture why. don't you get on this yeah oh yes. Sona Sona let me ask you a question how. would you I would call UPS and what. would you do I would give him a piece of.

my mind let's role play that hi this is. UPS hi UPS this is Sona I'm calling from. uh you may have heard of him Conan. O'Brien never once heard of him okay. well we had a package okay and guess. what they never showed up this is your. literal job UPS to deliver this. you're right what's in the package it. doesn't matter what's in the package. you're right how can I locate it without. the contents you Dill what why do you. need content well you should be asking.

me for my tracking number huh do you. even work for UPS no. you do I'm a champion. can I ask you a question yeah. your biggest insult is comparing someone. to a pickle yeah. wow what happened to you we I'll tell. you what we don't lose packages here at. UPS all right okay oh no no I would I. would get a I would call and get angry I.

will say something okay David do it yeah. David can I David you do a great job. thank you but Sona is the OG and Sona. has a temper okay that is off the charts. it started nice but Sona I am saying a. positive thing which is I used to hear. Sona get on the phone half the time for. me to try and find out what had gone. wrong for me. no and she would get stuff done and then. half the time or maybe eighty percent of.

the time it would be saying to someone. in L.A County. um I know I went too fast and gave me a. speeding ticket but you can't f with me. I'm good at getting out of speeding. speeding ticket like so yeah I have a. spotless record and I've gotten a lot of. tickets. so you're admitting that you did speed I. did and so I'm sorry when was the date. the radar gun was last calibrated those. are the questions you asked when you. fight tickets you say hey when uh how.

far were you from my car where were you. parked so you parked there for a long. time you're insane no this is actually. every day I'm telling you I would hear. this stuff on the phone and she got out. of every single ticket and I hear her. saying things like my car's coated in. aluminum. so no radar beam can and it was just. amazing and she always got out of it. it's just not worth it I got out of a. red light camera ticket they had a video. of me going through the red and I still.

beat how did you get out of it because I. I fought it and then it got uh denied. then I fought it again then it got. denied then I went to court and they. lost the video why aren't you why aren't. you putting this amount of energy into. my goddamn glasses. seriously David you do an amazing job. but I think if Sona was on this those. glasses would be here in 40 seconds yeah. I I could because she would go total. Crazy Ape on them in a way that. listen I don't wish this on you David I.

don't want you to become a monster but. Sona is a monster and she would you. complimenting me I don't understand. what's happening I think you're an. incredible I think when King Kong got to. the top of the Empire State Building and. swatted those biplanes down it was. amazing you are in out of control insane. person you're the Kraken but guess what. you're you're an amazing Kraken you're. the Loch Ness Monster on crack and you. get it done every time what is this I. don't know if I should say thank you. just say thank you I don't want to say I.

don't know I don't feel uh I don't feel. complimented you will once the drink. wears off yeah.