Larry David Did Not Want To Appear On “Late Night” | Conan O'Brien Needs A Friend
let's get started we can't we're losing. all this good stuff we'll start with you. reading that and you can fill in the. blank however you like yeah right. here who do you think you're giv. direction to him. okay how dare you I come in immediately. you're telling me what to do that's not. how it works okay I'm a boss okay okay. Conan yeah do I have to do this you do. okay you have to listen to him he's the. he's really in charge he puts it all. together okay first of all this is.
surprise to. me you've had a lot of surprises today. you didn't know we were all the way in. central Los Angeles no I did not yeah no. and uh you live quite far away you know. it's amazing as you start to as the. drive as you as you're taking the drive. how the resentment builds and builds and. builds until finally I you know I'm. coming north up Arlington what what am I. doing here yeah you and I live very. close to each other my company uh this.
building is in central. Hollywood. huh no no you can also use this and then. he can do that you see what I'm saying. there you're you're always coloring. inside the lines and that's what always. kept you back and and by the way I I. think it's important for your listeners. and viewers to know that Conan has. already made not one but two. anti-semitic statements to me personally. yeah keep that in yeah okay yeah two I.
was going to try to get to S before the. before the hour's up going to try to get. to Seven I had someone made a bet and it. was Jeff Ross actually who said I bet. you can't get seven in and Adam Sachs is. okay with it too so two Jewish people of. the Jewish faith have said let's try and. get to Seven I'll keep it tally yeah. thank you very much two okay so this is. how you know we traditionally start. everyone's done it you know I don't see. hi my name is Larry David and I. feel so so about being Conan O'Brien's.
friend that's the energy you're giving. since the minute you walked in so so. yeah you feel so so so so yeah you have. so far all you've done is about. how how long you had to drive to get. here okay uh which I thought was see I. think again again you're accusing me of. complaining okay I didn't say kavet I. said yes but still you're you're. treading into an area now I can't. believe that you complaining is.
considered an anti-semitic yes it is yes. it is well again is that three is that. three yeah it's two or it's 2.5 2.5 2.5. I think to be fair to be. fair Larry I dread this day the day that. you would come in here most people do. wouldn't before they see me yeah you're. really uh you're not a good guy I think. it's fair to say right I think it's you. know I no I don't I don't think so I. don't you disagree refer to me as.
Splendid that I'm a. splendid I don't know if I'm a good guy. I'm a splendid fellow you're a splendid. fellow I I would agree with that I would. agree with that I remember very clearly. the first time I met you you uh I was. shooting something on the same lot where. you guys shot Seinfeld I've been doing. the late night show for about two years. and uh I walked over cuz I saw something. was being shot an exterior was being. shot and then uh you were standing near. a table and you were eating a sandwich.
chomping away like a monster on a. sandwich and I got introduced to you and. with a full mouth you said I've never I. haven't seen your show and you said and. I went okay and you said so I don't know. if you're any good or not oh God and I. and you're with a full mouth and I said. okay and you went I mean I'm not being. rude I'm just telling you honestly Chomp. Chomp Chomp another bite I haven't seen. your show so I can't say right now.
whether you are any good or you're not. any good and I said okay and I. remembered thinking I respect the. honesty you didn't sugarcoat it I I I. have to say that does not sound like. me that that's much nicer than I think. okay all right all right all right but. you know what you were my first uh talk. show that's right yeah and you were not. happy about coming on a talk show but I. remembered uh I got you through is the. way I look at it yes you did yes you did.
and and Conan uhoh I'll never forget. that I'll never forget how how kind you. were to me say in that time in your time. of need really need yeah because it's. it's a you know it's a nerve-wracking. thing your first uh talk show you know. yeah I guess so yeah and um I was not. prepared mhm because I thought when you. go on those shows that you actually you.
you just talk but there's research done. people have no idea what what goes into. this they see people on these talk shows. and they think they're being oh. spontaneous and they're just talking but. they're not they're doing prepared. material yes a producer calls them. beforehand in your case it would have. been Frank Smiley Frank Smiley calling. you and yelling at you probably Frank. Smiley. called and um I was supposed to come up. with some anecdotes I guess but nothing. in my life that nothing ever happens to.
me so I you had there's not been one. anecdotal moment in your life exactly. there's a terrible dir of anecdotes. so to me the secret is once people know. you and like you and they know your. Rhythm you don't need the anecdotes. anymore once they knew you through my. kindness of putting you on a talk show. they got to know you they didn't know. you from Curb or from Seinfeld two shows. that had never really been much viewed. but when they saw you on my show at.
12:50 at night I. think it got you. through those. were for those of you those were loud. swallows that was a swallow and I don't. think that's a terrible thing to do. after after swallow why why why do I. have to curb that. yeah why should you apologize why should. I apologize and you know if there are. bodily functions you you do it you do. you do it I don't I don't think that's.
rude not at all.
