Johnny Knoxville (Full Episode) | Conan O'Brien Needs A Friend

Hello, [music] my name is Johnny. Knoxville and I feel harder than a. turnbuckle about being Conan [laughter]. O'Brien's friend. You know what? I think you just may have. had the best one ever. >> Would you would you prefer harder than a. folding chair because I can switch? >> turnbuckle. It's got a nice It's really. poetic. >> And I want that on my gravestone. Harder. than a turnbuckle. And soon. >> [music]. >> Hey there, welcome to Conan O'Brien.

Needs a Friend, joined by Sona Movsesian. and uh Matt Gourley still out on a. parental leave, has a brand new baby, very excited for him and for his wife. Amanda. Um he's got two girls now, which is just. lovely. And uh David Hopping filling in. for him. David uh good to have you here. again. >> Thank you. Happy to be here. Nice to see. you. Um David, you love your reality. television. You just love it. Yeah. Explain one thing to me because David. loves the show Traitors. And I um he just is obsessed with it.

>> Yeah. And so I checked out. uh the new season of Traitors uh because. someone I knew was a contestant on the. show and I thought I just want to see. what this is like and. uh I've I've seen it before, but I don't. know what the strategy is on a show like. that. I was watching Traitors and I. thought isn't it they all act like oh. I'm I'm going to really practice my. wiles and my expertise and I'm going to. win the game and I think it's not like.

chess. Yeah. It looks like people are. just doing stuff, but I don't really see. a strategy and then they get voted off. or not. It feels kind of random. Am I. wrong about that? >> They're supposed to like really be like. paying attention to people like to slip. up. Like if Sona's a traitor, I'm like. really watching to see if she messes up. and gives me any clue that she's the. person going and meeting at night to. like kill people in the castle. Well, here's why I watch. I watch because Alan saying the. word murder.

>> [laughter]. >> That is what keeps me coming back. And. he says it I mean, he must know it's. working for him because his outfits are. in are fantastic. They're just. wonderful. And he's he's he's just. chewing scenery left and right in the. most delicious way. But he manages to. say murder. Maybe every other sentence. >> Yeah. You know? >> It's so good. >> And. so that's fun. And then people are doing. stuff like they're running around and. you've got to put this cantaloupe on top. of that gravestone. Oh, no, not on that.

gravestone. And it doesn't seem to I try. to figure out what it's all about and I. don't know. I don't watch it. >> What do you what reality shows you. obsessed with, Sona? >> You know what? I'm not watching reality. right now. I'm watch I I'm I'm in the I. I just like I like horny shows. That's. what I do. I'm sorry. And you knew that. about me. Feuding rivalry you're talking. about. >> now I'm watching the new season of Tell. Me Lies. David and I talked about that. I don't know what that is. Of course you. don't. >> how is it horny? No, it's it's horny. There's there's like sexy people sexing.

And so I like it. Is it full nudity? No, you like do you see things? No, no, no, but just like Yeah, it is actually. >> soft core kind of. >> Not soft core. No, not so it's like with. you know, there's stuff. There's you can. see it, but you can't see it. Yeah, you. see the occasional butt and maybe a half. boob. Yeah. Oh my god, you're getting. really into like details. >> what you see? >> Oh my god. Can you just draw it for me? You can watch it. You're an adult man. If you want to watch it, you can.

Sometimes my priest stops by. >> [laughter]. >> Avert your gaze. Father McNulty. Um [laughter]. Oh my god. Uh so. reality shows. What is your what's your. go-to reality show? Is is it Traitors or. no? I would say Big Brother then. Traitors, which I know Blay watches and. Adam watches Big Brother. You're a Big. Brother I've never watched Big Brother. >> I like Traders, too. >> Yeah. Uh here's what I love about Big. Brother, which is it's in a house. The.

idea is it's people who are sequestered. in a house and they don't get to see. another person, period. Like none of the. producers they see, uh all the camera. people are behind one-way mirrors, uh. and it's watching 18 people slowly lose. their mind over the course of the season. because it the house is very big and. it's made for 18 people, but people get. voted out every week. So, when it gets. down like to like six people in a house. full of four 18 people and they haven't. talked to anyone else for like months,

it is insane. >> Would you agree with that assessment, Adam? I would. I also There's something. really comforting about it. It's on. three nights a week during the summer. when like a lot of the big sports are. off-season and it would be considered. boring at times. It's people sitting. around whispering like on couches, um. whispering about strategy, but there's. just something kind of passive and. enjoyable. >> better than talking to your loved ones. or reading a really good moving book. Um. no judgment, yeah? They also have a. thing called Big Brother After Dark and. they have all these camera feeds where.

you could just when they're not on the. show, you could just watch them. unfiltered and I used to I used to put. those on and work out when they were. working out in the house. [laughter] So, I would watch. Yeah, I like I had a friend cuz I live. alone. Can I just say first of all, it's. it's just for voyeurs, I think. And in. my day, you had to go out and do your. own peeping. >> [laughter]. >> And and I think that's one of the things. we've lost in America is you had to go. into someone else's yard and you had to. hang around near the shrubs and then.

peek in through their windows and hope. that someone was undressing. And that's. the kind of stuff that. I thought really was the fiber of this. country, the backbone. >> Yeah. Um I peeped. all through my teens, my 20s, my 30s, um I I leered, I ogled, I peered. occasionally. Uh and those were things. that those taught me valuable life. skills. And Like what? now people are. just Oh, I don't have to do that. I.

don't have to even leave my house. I. left my house wandering at night to try. and find houses that were brightly lit. where people were possibly undressing, maybe on the first floor. Okay. >> it's on the second floor, I had to go up. a drain pipe. This is stuff [laughter]. that taught me to be resilient. >> You really had to put the work in now. >> my my heart my arm and hand strength. from climbing up the sides of houses. And then. the policeman would show up. And they'd. say, "Hey, we've got a peeper." And. [laughter] then I had TO HAUL ASS.

I HAD TO SCURRY down and I had to run. And that old cherry top would come after. where. And they'd say, "Peeper, peeper, stand still." And I had to run. I had to. really run and run and run. And then I'd. get home and my mother would say, "How. did the peepin' go?" My mother would. say, >> [laughter]. >> "Now how did the Tell me how the peepin'. go tonight?". And I'd say, "Nah, I got chased by the. fuzz." And she'd say, "Oh, have a fried. ham." And so, you know, I'd chow down. and that's just how things were in my.

mind. So, Now we can just put on Paramount. Plus. >> [laughter]. >> You ever do any peeping there, Eduardo? Back in my day. Yeah. >> No. No. Never. >> [laughter]. >> Never. Never. >> No. Don't play along. Anyone here want to join me on this. peeping thing? >> peeper? Oh, man, I'm a good peeper. >> I'd peep to the right, I'd peep to the. left. I was really good. I used to not be able. to go to the left, but then I learned. how. >> Oh, good. >> Yeah. Goals. Yeah. Anyhow, >> I'm happy for you. I'm a good peeper. I.

just love saying peeper now. Mhm. Today's guest, co-creator. >> [laughter]. >> Oh god. and stars in the MTV series. Jackass. This guy would appreciate my. peeping past. I know he would. Now you. can see him hosting the Fox series Fear. Factor: House of Fear. And he just. announced that a fifth Jackass movie is. on the way. That's good news. Later this. year. We're thrilled he's here. Johnny Knoxville, welcome.

I've always been an admirer of yours and. you you are a have a special place in my. heart because in another lifetime you. were on an episode of. the late night show that we then decided. to turn into claymation and it was an. episode where I think you were the first. guest and you were great. And so it's. all happens in claymation later on. And. then I think Richard Lewis comes out and. starts talking about Shaq's penis. Just. goes off the rails. It was wonderful.

>> It was wonderful and he goes off the. rails and at one point I stand This is. in the real show. I stand and I say, "Walk with me, Johnny." Because he's. going on this long he says he saw Shaq's. penis and he's describing it and I I. walk with you [laughter] and I put my. arm around your shoulder and you and I. walk to the fake window and look out at. the fake window while Richard Lewis is. still talking about Shaq's penis. And. then this all happened in claymation, which made me so happy because I'm like, "Walk with me, Johnny." And it's not. good claymation. >> [laughter].

>> And David Bowie's there and I think. he was on the couch. I don't know if. Richard Lewis starts going off in front. of him. It was I don't remember. It's. all a blur. >> Yeah, cuz that's the first time it's the. first time I think maybe the only time I. met David Bowie and it was like this is. one of the best nights cuz after we. filmed you're like, "Wow, that was. good.". >> We wanted to do a claymation episode, but we wanted a really great episode. that would be visual and funny to see in. claymation and then that was the. episode. We decided, "Oh, this is not going to. get better than that." And then it was. so much fun, but there are so many times.

the weirdest times I'll like be brushing. my teeth and I'll hear a "Walk with ME, JOHNNY.". >> [laughter]. >> YOU AND I GOING TO THE WINDOW to look. out. So weird, but you've always been. you're always a an amazing guest and a. true uh true to your your your oeuvre, your work, a real showman. And and so I. wanted to start with. I know that. I don't do this with every guest, but. you have such a fascinating career arc.

Do you know what I mean? Just absolutely. fascinating. Why did you do quotations. when you said career colon? >> [laughter]. >> Son of a. I'm including myself in there, too. >> [laughter]. >> Um no one sets out to have a career the. way that you have, and it's I just think. there's so much that's brilliant about. it. And And and then you're so effing. likable, you know? And you've So you you. ride that all along, too. That is kind. of your I think your secret sauce, but.

how does one even begin to become a. Johnny Knoxville? Well, you don't go to. college, that's for sure. [laughter]. And you just get on the 10 West and. >> [laughter]. >> Okay, step one, if you're listening, don't go to college, then [laughter] get. on the 10 West. >> Yeah. Uh. and you're you're friend. >> faster and disaster. That's that's how. you do it. Uh and you started making. these videos on your own, right? This is.

We're going back to what? The late '90s? Yes, what happened was honestly I I. moved out to Los Angeles to become an. actor just 2 months or maybe a month. after high school. Yep. Didn't do a lot, you know, Right. >> uh for. 5, 6 years, and then my then. girlfriend got pregnant. I'm like, "Oh, I have to do something quick because. I that's the most frightened I've ever. been cuz I had a little girl on the way. and I'm waiting tables and I'm like, I.

got to do something quick. So, my. uh I was living next to Antoine Fuqua in. this duplex, and he set me up with this. casting agent who got me a commercial. agent, and I started writing for. magazines. And uh like my version of. uh participatory journalism like Hunter. S. Thompson type of. I was like, how about if I my one of my first. articles was uh how about if I test. self-defense equipment on myself?

I was I was just that was my best guess. at how to support a family. >> [laughter]. >> And it was all out of fear of how to. support uh how to support a little girl. Honestly. That is so [laughter]. uh. I I you know I think you described that. leap as if it's an honest uh natural. progression. You know, well, a kid's on. the way, and I better, you know, start. to get serious here. It's time to test. self-defense equipment. >> [laughter]. >> Time to shoot myself in the chest while.

wearing a bulletproof vest. [laughter]. That will provide security. >> Yeah, so you start doing it, and then. you start making videos. Well, when. the only magazine a couple magazines. around town wanted that article, but none of them they wanted treat it as. a negative pickup. Come see us after. you're done, and then we'll. The only. magazine who would help me like buy the. stun gun, the taser gun, I I bought the. bulletproof vest with money my mom gave.

me for Christmas that year, was the. [laughter] editor of Big Brother. magazine, Jeff Tremaine, who is now the. director of Jackass. And. he had a skateboarding magazine owned by. Larry Flynt that. that's And Jeff right before I was. writing. I said, how about if I write the. article? And Jeff goes, why don't you. film it at the same time? And they. for our skate video. I'm like, okay. And that's what happened. And. of course I went to the. He's like, "I'll have Demetri go with. you to film it." Who is now the director.

of photography. of Jackass. Right. And I pull up that. morning and. I'm like, "Get in." And he goes, "Here's. the camera. This is play. This is pause. It's got film in it." I'm like, "You're. not shooting it?" He's like, "Uh no." He. did cuz there was a gun involved. He. didn't want. >> to be there. >> Nobody wanted to be there. >> No one wants to be there. Yeah. So, that's why the camera work so shaky with. that. So, you start making these things. and then you get a chance to.

make a show for MTV. >> Mhm. And I didn't know this. At the same moment that you have this. deal to make a show and you're about to. make the show, out of nowhere, you get. this offer from Lorne Michaels at. Saturday Night Live. >> Yeah. And I never heard that. Nothing. was happening in my life like two or. three months before. You know what I. mean? I the wonderful things with the. family and the kid, but professionally. nothing. And then it's like I have. a TV show, we're about to shoot the. pilot for MTV, and then, like you said,

Lorne Michaels comes calling and we go. meet at the Polo Lounge, the Beverly. Hills Hotel, where Fear and Loathing. beat did. begin in. It was a lot, you know, because. I I had no gigs before this and he's. offering me a spot like 5 minutes on. Saturday Night Live each week. Not to do. characters and things like that, do what. I do, like make a video each week. And. it was a I had to I really seriously. considered it, but I ended up.

thinking I would go on there, I'm not. going to have any creative control. whatsoever, and I'm about to do this. other thing with me and my friends, and. I'd rather where I have all the control. and I'd rather bet on us than enter into. that. And we'd probably. I I'd been lucky to be on Saturday Night. Live, but I chose that. You know, I. mean, obviously, you sure you certainly. didn't make the the wrong move there. Um. and you got to be the master. of your own universe by doing Jackass as.

opposed to being a small piece of a show. where you have very less sometimes we're. not going to air your piece tonight. It. didn't make it or you know, we're going. to hold on to that or. so so that was the right thing to do. Well, I didn't think so when the pilot. while we're shooting the pilot, it got. shut down and I'm like, "Oh man, we're. canceled. It's not even This is not even. making it to the air now.". >> it shut down? We were filming a bit in. West Hollywood at this hardware store, which I think is a restaurant now,

Laurel Hardware. >> It's both. You can get hardware and. food. >> right, right. >> [laughter]. >> I'll have the steak tartar and the and. the rake. I'll have the rake as well. >> [laughter]. >> And I walked in, my face was all dirty. in a prison orange jumpsuit and I was. handcuffed and I was trying to get them. to help me saw the handcuffs off. >> [laughter]. >> They cleared out the place. Everyone's. scared and I realized at one point I'm. out there on the saw section sawing and. there's no not even my cameraman are. around. I'm like, "Well, shit." I love.

that you're you're doing you're. committing [laughter] to the bit and. there's no camera. >> At one point I'm sawing and it goes. right on my wrist and it was very close. to like so then I heard the cops coming. I'm like, "Well, I better get outside. because that's where the cameras are.". >> [laughter]. >> And I I I run outside. and right as. like three or four car loads of cops are. pulling up and the first lady on the. scene. she gets out of her car, tells me get on.

the ground and I abide by what she's. saying. But she didn't put her car in park and. it runs right into a telephone telephone. pole in front of me and I'm on the. ground. You can hear me go, "Oh, no.". >> [laughter]. >> Cuz now she now they're mad. And. >> [laughter]. >> MTV couldn't shoot in Holly West. Hollywood for over 10 years after that. because we didn't have a permit. We. didn't [laughter] know you permitted to. shoot these things.

>> have a permit? >> We didn't know what a permit was. That's. so fantastic. >> [laughter]. >> You know. you are giving credence to this idea. that I've had for a long time, which is. that if a camera's going I will do. things that I won't do otherwise. >> Mhm, yes. And so in a jackass kind of. way I have always, if there's a camera. rolling, I'll say and and there's a. potential for people to be laughing Yes. and it for it to be recorded I will do.

things that otherwise I'd say, "Oh no, I'd rather not." I I I eat bugs. I I. mean, we'll talk about Fear Factor, but. all the stuff you guys do in Fear Factor. I lose common sense if I think there's a. potential that people would see it and. laugh. Yeah. And but you're talking. about situations where you're invoking. your the police are coming, people have. guns. >> Right. and they can very justifiably let. you say, "A guy in an orange jumpsuit. came running out of the hardware store.

and I discharged my weapon." And then. it's like, "Oh, that's too bad for that. guy making a pilot." Well, [laughter]. that's what the lady told me afterwards, the female policeman. She goes, "If you. would have just moved a few inches while. you were on the ground to like like I. was going to get away she I would have. just put a bullet in your ear." And I'm. like, "Well, I'm glad I kind of just. laid there." Yeah. >> [laughter]. >> Yeah. >> And I said, "Is this the weirdest call. you ever had?" And they said, "No, one. time a guy was on PCP at the top of a.

palm tree, butt naked, and slid all the. way down." Yes. Which we tried to convince one of the. cast guys to do, but no one was up for. it. [laughter]. That is either extremely painful or an. erotic thrill. >> [laughter]. >> No. No? Okay. Um, but the laughter thing you're talking. about. I I don't know how to. uh. write. to make.

uh like wow, what would uh. America thinks funny. I I that would. that would make me freeze and but so. with Jackass if. I only know how to make my friends. laugh. And if they're laughing. >> Yes. >> probably we're good, but if if they're. not laughing we're probably shooting. again. You do this for. I mean, there's Jackass itself then and. it's not always you doing the stunts. obviously. You get your friends so that. you can it seems to me like distribute. the pain and injury. Yes. So that it's.

you know, it's a huge sensation and then. Jackass uh the movie. I remembered. seeing that and just being Okay, I. remember thinking, how do they do this. now? Cuz you know, the TV show has so. many sort of iconic moments. How do you do a movie? And I thought you. guys made great. decisions when you made that movie. >> you. You know, and I don't know what. because you up the ante a little bit, but you also have like production and. you you know what I mean? It's not just.

the show. It's sort of on steroids and. more presentational. I don't I. What was the thinking behind the movie? The thinking behind the movie was. uh we did. they called it three seasons of Jackass, but it was 24 episodes. and over series of 9-10 months and we. had a unfortunately a couple of copycat. incidences and it was an election year. and Joseph Lieberman came down on. Hollywood. That was his.

big platform and me personally and MTV. because of that. >> Yeah. So it became impossible to do. Jackass, right? Uh we had uh. all these safety. OSHA guys on the set. You can't jump off. anything more than 4 ft and. and I felt like this doesn't feel right. Uh what we do is really silly, right? But it it means something to me. So, I'm.

like. I think this is the end. And so, I gave. an interview to my hometown newspaper. and said I quit. >> Yeah. And. everyone was kind of surprised cuz I. just went rogue. >> Yeah. So, there was a lot of heat back. and forth. MTV was upset because I was. under contract, yada yada yada. A lot of. back and forth. Finally, uh idea for a movie was floated and I. was and Jeff and Spike came to me and. said, "Well, how about if we just do a. movie instead?" I'm like.

like the idiot I am, I'm like, "Look, who's going to play us?". >> [laughter]. >> And they're like, "No, no.". >> idiot. Yes. [laughter]. Is it a love Is it A LOVE STORY? >> [laughter]. >> A NAUGHTY VERSION of the TV show. I'm. like, "Okay, got it.". You know. So, that I was a little. confused as I often am. But I felt like. uh there was a time when.

South Park made a movie and I thought, "Well, this. it traditionally when TV shows make a. movie, for many years it was the rule. that it's a bad idea. You know what I. mean?" And then. >> Justin and Kelly? >> [laughter]. >> Okay, almost always a bad idea. Um. That's [laughter] the first one that. popped into your head. Justin Guarini was just here. I'm not. the butchest guy to come along the lock. >> [laughter].

>> Well, anyway, uh. >> [laughter]. >> great poll, by the way. But, you know, I remember like South. Park made a movie and it turned out. like, oh, yes. Excellent. And then, uh you guys made a movie and it felt. like this time when. people were making the right call and it. was actually translating. I think you. Um I'm curious, you know, I think about. there was, whatever, 30 years or 28. years there where I was doing a show.

and always saying. uh yes to things cuz I thought it would. be funny and I got tossed by a water. buffalo once and fell onto, up into the. air and fell onto hard concrete. Well, and that was not what I was supposed to. do. And all my common sense went away. and I think about that all the time. Now, I'm thinking about your life where. you have a montage playing in your head. of things you did where probably halfway. through you thought, this is a terrible. idea. But, I'm going to do it anyway.

Well, it's like, this is a terrible idea. I'm so glad I'm doing it. We're about to. get footage. >> [laughter]. >> And by the way, I've always wanted to. get hit by a water buffalo, so I'm. envious. >> [laughter]. >> I was sitting there like, oh. >> [laughter]. >> I'm I'm glad that you look up to me that. way. Uh. so, are there things that stand out to. you now um that you are this. silver-haired wise.

you know, patrician? Are there things. that stand out to you now where you go. like, oh my god, that was a terrible. idea. I I don't know. >> Do you have any regrets at all? Like, I. wish I hadn't done that one. Well, yeah, I mean, we're we're been going back. looking through some old bits and you're. like, oh, that that but not like. anything for my physical safety, just. because, you know, they all can't be. hits. >> [laughter]. >> Um so then, then I'm like, "Oh man, we.

just. >> [laughter]. >> Even watching the the first movie, it's. it's almost first Jackass movie, it's so. tame. into what it became. And uh which but I. I don't regret any of that. It's just. what it was. And and like watching. myself do pranks and. I just. I watch it and just go. why did I do that? Right. >> course of action. Why couldn't I have. pivoted into the I I just.

I just like to beat myself up a little. >> past work we've done and have regrets. But for you it might be. um why did I light myself on fire? Now I. mean the toothpaste is out of the tube, Conan. I can't do anything about it now. So I'm all right with everything. That's. good. Um Are you in pain? Do you walk. around in constant pain? It's sometimes, but I'm I'm not. It's not even a joke. I'm not really in.

touch with my body. So I can just Yeah. >> kind of deal with whatever. Yeah. Uh I. It's funny you say that because my least. favorite question is if I go to a doctor. or something and they say, "Now how does. it feel?" And I go, "I don't know. I. just want to get to the grave." Yeah, I. >> [laughter]. >> You know, like. I hate I HATE WHEN THEY'RE telling me, you know, or whatever you get a massage. and they're like, "Now how does this. feel?" I'm like, "I DON'T KNOW.". >> [screaming]. >> I'M LIKE, "LEAVE ME ALONE.

I'M TRYING TO GET THROUGH LIFE.". >> [laughter]. >> YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? I HAVE THAT KIND. OF FEELING. AND SO when you said that I. was electrified. >> Yeah. Yeah. It's like I can just I don't know. I I did this to myself. So what what. what am I going to do? Yeah. >> not going to complain to anyone. It's. just. that's what it is. Yeah, that's true. I. hadn't thought of that. Most people that. walk around like, "Oh, man, my hip.". What happened? Oh, you know, just all. those years of working at the plant. And. for you, it's, "Well, I strapped myself.

to a rocket and had it fired into a. concrete wall. >> [laughter]. >> I you know, like Wile E. Coyote. Yeah. >> And it's hard to be like, "Oh, man, >> [gasps]. >> that's tough." [laughter]. >> Yeah, what happened? I know exactly what. happened. >> footage. We have six cameras. I can [laughter]. prove it. Wow. Um. I mean, it's incredible. It's so. interesting to me, too, that. you've referenced Hunter S. Thompson a. couple of times, someone that I had the. honor of getting to interview, I think, twice. And.

um. and and your interest early on in. writing. Do you know what I mean? These. are Those are things that I feel very. connected to. And Hunter S. Thompson was. someone who put his entire. uh. himself and his body and his sanity, he. poured it all into his work. Yeah. And. it's fascinating to me that in a way you. are in that vein. Do you know what I. mean? You're you're. you're you're saying, "Okay, here's my. body, and I'm going to put all of it.

into what I do. And it's going to go. through this this grinder, but that's. that is my work." Yeah, this is that was. my best guess, you know, honestly. Um. and I love. Hunter You know, I like two books kind. of. changed my life early on, like On the. Road by Jack Kerouac. We're in a bar. with my cousin, and he hands me the. book, and. I just I didn't know people lived like. that. Yeah. >> And it was, you know, I'm small town in. Tennessee, everyone.

lives there, stays there. And And then I read Fear and Loathing in. Las Vegas when I was 19. And I felt like I didn't know anyone. could write like this and be so free. And uh. after that, I I was useless. You know, it's like my my path was set, I guess. >> It's so funny. There was a time in your. life, I think I had just moved out to LA. like 22 and I'm just only reading.

um you know, Fear and Loathing books and. it just spoke to me. Not that I. it my life matched that in any way, but. it takes you over in a way that you. know, at my age now, I don't know that. it would. I'd like it, but it wouldn't. it wouldn't inhabit me the same way. >> And like in actuality, if you're living. like that or your friends living like. that, it's so exhausting to be. around. >> [laughter]. >> Yeah. >> I have had some friends who.

just. I mean, Steve-O, he was off the rails. just doing the worst drugs you can get. your hands on. Uh PCP, uh those those nitrous. canisters. They would be it would be a. sea of nitrous canisters at his feet and. uh. and it was exhausting. I mean, he'll. tell you it was exhausting, but I mean, now he's like he's doing great. He's. been sober for well over we put him away.

in 2008, so 17 years or something. >> Good for him. >> Yeah, so I mean, people ask me, "Well, would you say something about if. bravery?" I'm like, "That's. that's bravery." Like he has to face. that dragon every morning and he does. and he's he's doing great and I'm really. proud of him. It is the most impressive. thing Yeah. I see people do is uh you. know, and it's just. amazing that you can give yourself. another chapter like that where it's.

like, "Steve-O, can I get you anything?". "Maybe uh do you have hibiscus tea?". >> [laughter]. >> It It takes you 4 seconds to stand in. front of a bull, but he has to do. something like this [laughter]. every He has to face yeah, all day long. >> Yeah. Yeah. Do you ever get when you're. with all those guys and you guys. together are together, do you ever have the thing of. um. guys, keep it down. You know, you know, it's it's it You know what I mean? We're. not that anymore. Keep it down. I I.

don't want to make too much noise. tonight or I got to get to bed. It's. 9:15. [laughter]. I don't even I wouldn't even know how to. go about trying to quiet them down. You. [laughter] know, it's just. You can try. >> Tranquilizer gun. Yeah. I think the I. think everyone becomes worse in those. situations. >> If someone tries to Yes, yes. Don't. think I'll do that. Well, here we go. Do. you get that when the cameras are off, especially early on, it was way worse than when the cameras.

are on. Is that true? >> Oh, it was Yeah. Yeah. Very They're very excitable. >> [laughter]. >> It's like you're talking about Gremlins. >> [laughter]. >> Don't get them wet, you know. Yeah. Don't get them wet with whiskey. cuz they're very excitable. [laughter]. It's funny you brought up safety. uh. you know, coordinators or people that. are there to make sure that everyone's. behaving properly.

Yeah, the times that I've been on a set. where I had to do the most tame thing, literally the most tame thing, like go. through the ceiling of the show The. Office, and. land land on a desk that's just like 3. ft below me. uh on Dwight Schrute's desk and just. it's just like a little drop down and at. the time I'm doing it I'm 40 and I'm. just throwing myself around all the time. cuz I'm a big kid. and someone's there like, let's talk. This is let's walk through this. Now,

we're going to hold your body in six. different places and slowly Yeah. >> [laughter]. >> Uh. You got to buy me dinner first. Uh. >> [laughter]. >> And then they're going to slowly and. then we've made the desk out of a. special foam. And I'm like, "Guys, I I. grew up in a big family and all we did. was toss each other off of staircases.". Yeah. >> And that is my way of. um you know, most times I have a comedy.

idea, the first thing I want to do is. pretend to punch somebody and then I'm. thrown through a glass window. It's I. like that kind of stuff. And um and I. think I I am not body aware in the way. that I'm. I'm going to do something still at some. point cuz I just think I'm having fun. and I'm being funny and I'm goofing. around and I'm going to forget that I'm. 85 years old. Is Are you guys picking Are you. auditioning for the new Jackass movie? >> well, I have to [laughter] say I am and.

it's Conan O'Brien. You know what? I would. Yeah. >> I would do it. >> What if it's just him [laughter] falling. out of bed? No, I think I WOULD DO IT. YEAH. YES. A big stunt for me is. >> [laughter]. >> behaving myself. in a crowded theater. No, I I swear to god there is a wish. fulfillment with me. That's why I'm I. get so excited. Uh I'm obviously a big. fan of yours and the stuff that you guys. were doing and it's funny. To me it's. the yin and the yang. I am very cerebral.

and. cautious and all of those things and. then there's the flip side of it where I. kind of like it where I'm not in. control. It's a relief from the other. guy. >> Yeah. Yeah, I'm I'm cautious with my kids, right? I'm like, "Oh." But um with me I. would never I was like a hell I told I'm. a total helicopter parent when they were. little. Like I'm the guy underneath. >> [laughter]. >> That's hilarious. >> bars trying to like make sure they don't. fall. >> Just you lecturing uh at 19-year-old.

Now listen. [laughter]. I want you to have your head strapped on. right tonight. >> [laughter]. >> And you have like a. you have an iron sticking through your. skull. A bicycle? Are you kidding me? A. bicycle? No way. You're going to wear seven helmets. I. love all of that. That's fantastic. I do. too. You know, I want to tell you we had. um. uh they let me watch the new uh Fear. Factor. They gave us a link to it and I. was really enjoying it and I have to say.

getting you as the host was a was a. stroke of genius on somebody's part. >> Yes, I'm I'm very happy. I had a lot of. fun, but uh but I mean it's not too much. of a pivot from what Jackass was except. I can't go at these people like I do my. >> [laughter]. >> You're dealing with civilians here. Yes, these people have pride. A sense of a sense of self-esteem. >> [laughter]. >> They want to live in society.

They they can use tools. >> [laughter]. >> to make other tools. They hunt and gather. Walk on their hind. legs. >> [laughter]. >> They wish to procreate. Yeah. So um they. uh no, it's it's it's fun because I also. love that you get to be around it and. it's it's really fun that they're doing. all of this stuff and you're there. wearing uh one of these fantastic like.

polo sweaters. Oh, well, thank you. My. wife was my costumer, Emily, so thank. you. >> it's but you're always there like ah ha. ha. Enjoy and you become the Ricardo. Montalban on Fantasy Island. [laughter]. You know? It's like. you don't have to break a sweat and. you're like, all of you, get into the. giant meat grinder. And you're there. You know [laughter] what I mean? >> You've earned it. It feels like you've. really earned the right to be that guy. Yeah, it's fun. Like. uh you know, I. when people. uh display fear in an entertaining.

manner, I'm I'm here for it. >> [laughter]. >> Um, and I thought I was going I first got. the gig. I'm like, "Oh, man, I'm really. going to make their life hell.". I got excited and that's never good. But then as I got closer, I'm like, "Well, these kind these are these. they're different, you know, and. there's money at stake and they're. trying these people actually do have. phobias." Yep. So I I was like, "Maybe. I'm I just felt it more natural to kind.

of help them through it." Right. But I. still gave them hell. But mostly I I I. like I enjoyed both things. >> It sounds to me like you've started to. develop empathy. >> [laughter]. >> I did. I even teared up a couple of. times in the show. It's like cuz you see. these reality shows and people are cry. I'm like, "Everyone's fine. >> [laughter]. >> What are you crying about? You just met. this person.". >> feel my legs and you're crying. >> days ago. [laughter] But then a few. people left the show. I'm like,

I don't know. I I. I I spent too much time around my. mother. I'm. Do you ever get asked to like come back. and speak at your high school or. something and it's Do you Do you know. what I mean? Cuz it's a strange thing to. get. because you've been extremely successful. and iconic and now. we'd like you to speak to these young. people. >> Yeah, [laughter] exactly. Do as I did. Here's what I find. Gosh, fairy tales. Screw college. >> [laughter]. >> Don't go to college.

Fire a nail gun into your anus. Hey, that's not half bad. That's good. Oh, I could be a writer. If you if you. guys won't let me be in the new Jackass. movie, >> [laughter]. >> I will be a writer. Has anyone ever Oh god. >> [laughter]. >> fired hot lava. into their urethra? >> [laughter]. >> Lava from Mount Etna. OH MY GOD. YOU GUYS ARE LIKE, CONAN, NO, IT. WOULDN'T WORK. It would evaporate the. tissue around it. Okay, I'll keep.

working on it. I come in with really giant glass. >> [laughter]. >> I'll keep working. Conan, I'm just spitballing here, but. >> [laughter]. >> No, I have never been invited to speak. before. high school, college, or yeah. You know, and I don't blame them. No, they don't know. Well, I think you'd be. a great they should. They should. They're missing out on a great speech. So, I also was telling you I'm obsessed. with the new Fear Factor house because. they there's reality shows always take.

place in a house. It's always a similar. looking house. I don't care. And what. this house. is a house that's absolutely stunning. and it looks like the richest man in the. world lives there and he's got taste. It's like beautiful. This house is Where. is it? It's in West Vancouver. It is a. beautiful place. Uh They have all these. shots of it and I just keep thinking. about I want to be on the show as a. contestant. >> [laughter]. >> cuz I really want to try this lava. thing. Um You can do that on your own. I know.

I And I And trust me, I have. It's. getting the lava hot enough. Um. >> [laughter]. >> it's a problem. But I also I just I love. that house. Well, they do celebrity. Jeopardy. What about some celebrity Fear. Factor at some point, you know? Yeah, I. love that. Yeah. Dame Judi Dench getting. >> [laughter]. >> shot out of a cannon. And. You know, I I was trying to convince. the show Traitors. I'm like. we should have a Jackass Traitors.

because all the things that you need to. pos- to possess. to be good in that show none of us have. >> [laughter]. >> And then we'll be physically attacking. each other. We can be pranking I love. that that you go into a show where. there's strategy and psychology but you. just start firing nail guns. >> [laughter]. >> No one's going to want to walk down to. breakfast and open the door. You know, you don't want No one's going to want to.

touch the door handle. >> [laughter]. >> It's uh. The genius behind I mean Alan. watching Alan say murder is the. whole I watch that show just for his. costumes are fantastic. Oh, yes. >> Fear Factor coming into other shows and. I think you know like password um you. know just Just like it. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> No, uh Jeopardy. You know, just shows. where it's very intelligent shows where. people have to kind of use their streets.

their knowledge but you guys are just. smashing everything. >> really amp it up for the celebrity Fear. Factor, too, because these people know. what they're getting into and they're in. the business. So, just hand me a pen and. a piece of paper and yeah, I can. That would be fun just writing bits. Okay, I will I'll produce this with you. Yes, yes. Yeah, [laughter] I'll take. very little money and by very little I. mean 80%. >> Yes. Um that'll be my biggest stunt.

>> [laughter]. >> Just doing a Fear Factor show with you. and getting most of the money. That'll be a That'll be a pain unlike. anything you've ever felt before. Well, that may come at a price. >> [laughter]. >> No, I don't target I can I I can only. target my the jackass guys. It's Yeah, yep. Yep. There's a trust obviously. there's such a trust and there's real. friendship there. I've had I've in a. couple times I've. targeted a friend that was not part of.

any. a civilian was a. and. it just hurt his feelings and I'm like. >> [laughter]. >> I'm never going to do that again. It's. not. >> Yeah, it's Yeah, that was It is. interesting you bring that up because. they always say it's always uh. you know, it's funny until someone gets. hurt. And I always think it's actually. when someone's feelings get hurt. Yeah. >> I This the bottom falls out for me. If. If unless the person is pure evil and.

and deserves to. have hurt a hurt feeling. But other than. that, the times I've done anytime I've. done something and it got back to me, oh. no, someone hurt that joke and they were. sad. I'm like, oh man, that's the worst. >> It sucks the air out of the room. And. then you feel I just like, I'm a. monster. And it was I was doing things that not. even like 1/10 of what I do to the guys, but still I was like, okay, I'm not. going to target anyone else just. I can, you know, save it for my fellas. and and now Rachel Wolfson. Yeah. When.

is the next movie coming out? Uh June. 26th. Are you doing any stunts in the. new one or do they cut to a dummy now. that we're talking? I mean, they always. cut to a dummy. >> [laughter]. >> I can I can do stunts. I just can't do. anything where I get another concussion. because I've How many have you had? 16. Oh. >> Do you know who I am right now? Yes, Andy. >> [laughter]. >> I don't care about a broken.

arm or ankle, but it just I can't have. any more concussions. Yeah. Yeah, I. think that's a wise course of action. >> And I feel like I did my thing. I I'm I. don't feel like I'm missing anything, so. uh That's good. Yeah. I mean, if I saw. you in the shower, I wouldn't be. horrified. There's not a lot of I think. you probably WOULD BE. >> [laughter]. >> MY GOD. I DIDN'T KNOW IT COULD BE SO SMALL. >> [laughter].

>> There's just like a big piece of torso. missing and you don't even notice it any. you keep like little knickknacks in. [laughter] there. You keep Hummel. figurines and a little alarm clock in. there. Pull my arm off to get MY BACK. >> [laughter]. >> HEY CONAN, HEY THANKS A LOT. HEY, THIS THING'S GREAT. I love it. Um so what is your now commitment to the. Fear Factor show? You just uh you're. waiting to see? Yeah, I guess it comes. out tomorrow.

14th. Yeah, that year. It's really fun. Thank you and yeah, I'm I'm hoping it I. I I had so much fun. I'm hoping they. pick it up. So it seemed to do good on. the sneak preview on. >> There's a lot of stuff that doesn't that. I don't worry about but um. insects creep me out, you know? And I. don't think I have a phobia about it but. I just always a hairy spider to me is. like the worst thing in the world like a. tarantula. So. an an arachnid that has hair creeps me.

out. and the idea of but then again if I was. on camera and there was a studio. audience there and people were laughing. and I knew they'd really laugh if I went. for it. I'd pick one up and start. licking it. as it stung my tongue and filled me. >> [laughter]. >> with a heart paralyzing venom. and I'd look at the camera and go daddy. likes his gum gum juice. >> [laughter]. >> and then I would die. >> [gasps]. >> You know? The thing about those hairy.

spiders is the hair gets in your eyes. and it feels like asbestos. What? You're. talking from experience. No, it's it's. you just can't get it it just itches and. you can't get it. can't get it off of you. It's funny I. can bring up anything to you and you're. like here's the thing. >> [laughter]. >> about a rhino horn in your ass. It's funny. >> know is there's a. >> [laughter]. >> The horn is kind of waxy and then you. can't get the wax out of your ass. Like. anything I bring up you're going to go.

you know, it's funny." The bull's horns. are very. dirty. And that's why when people get. gored before penicillin, that was kind. of it for them. But now they have. penicillin, you can get gored pretty. much all you want. Do you ever. >> [laughter]. >> There's one matador, I don't I can't. remember his name. He's been gored like. 63 times. It's crazy. Uh When he gets a drink at a bar, ALL. THE. >> [laughter].

>> OH, THIS BIT IN THE WORLD, BUT I LOVE. IT. I'M FINE. LOOK LOOK LOOK. >> [laughter]. >> HE'S MY FAVORITE MATADOR, hands down. But you know, it's funny. I think of a a. germophobic matador is a really funny. idea. >> [laughter]. >> He's like He's He doesn't mind getting. gored, but he keeps trying to use a wet. wipe ON THE HORN. >> [laughter]. >> HIS CAPE IS A BIG WET WIPE. >> [laughter]. >> YEAH. IT'S LIKE, IT'S KIND OF LESS COOL. Here I go. No, I don't care. You got to.

wipe the bull's horns and hooves before. he gets in the ring with them. >> [snorts]. >> Um Well, this has been a blast. It's. been really fun. And. I really enjoy you on the new Fear. Factor, and I just love talking to you. You are a just an infinitely charming. fellow. Congrats on the new movie coming. out and that you're. thriving. It's just really And that. you're well, you're happy, you're here. >> Yes. Yeah. You're able to move about. >> Oh, yes. I Yeah, after I finished the. last Jackass, I was just I was so happy.

Like, I'm still walking. Yeah. I'm good. Yeah. So, uh But thank you. You've. always been so kind to me. >> god, are you kidding? I just I'm I'm a. big fan and thanks so much for doing it. I really appreciate it. >> Oh, one last You were talking about all. these safety guys uh. when you're shooting something, you got. to get really shady safety guys. >> [laughter]. >> Our safety guys are the shadiest. Just a. little tip before I go. >> So, there's no union? [laughter]. Oh, no. But, like our our alligator.

expert, Manny, who dives in swamps at. night with a miner's light and pulls. alligators up from the bottom. >> Jesus. He's a wonderful man. He is. Tarzan. But, he's our safety guy when we. work with alligators. And so, you know, you film those safety meetings before, and they're like, "Okay, Manny, uh oh. tell us what what's the plan here?" He. goes, "Well, uh. Stevo will be in there with an. alligator, and if the alligator bites. him, hopefully he will let go.".

>> [laughter]. >> And they're like, "All right, let's shoot.". I. So, that's good. Very You need a very. shady. >> Yeah. safety guy who probably wasn't a. safety guy A MONTH AGO. >> [laughter]. >> YOU NEED A PRETTY GOOD SAFETY GUY.

I AM SITTING here with Sona Movsesian. Yeah. and normally now I'd say Matt. Gourley, but he is out on maternity. leave. Paternity. He's a guy He's a He's. a man. I don't I'm going to stick with. what I said. >> Oh, you're going to you're going to. double down on it? >> he's on maternity leave. Trust me. He. got his knickers in a twist. Um he's. out. He had a beautiful baby girl. >> Yes. now, and very happy for him. Filling in for him is David Hopping. Now, this is a rare occasion where both.

of my assistants are sitting here with. me. You've got Sona, assistant uh since. 2009. >> Yeah. And David Hopping, when did you. really take over as my full-time. assistant? >> Uh 2021. >> 2021 when the boys were born. >> That's right. Okay. So, you've both. assisted me, and I thought this is a. great time to ask you guys some pretty. blunt questions. Oh. And you have to be. honest. No, seriously, you have to be. honest. Okay? >> You mean we don't have to try to protect.

your feelings? Cuz we try that all the. time. No, no, no. I want to I think this. is a good chance to know more about me. I am not in the least bit defensive. I'm. an open book. This is going to be fun. >> Yeah, okay. Is this going to be like a. 30-minute segment? I'm curious. [laughter]. Sona, what was your least favorite thing. to do for me? Whoa. The least favorite thing. >> you to do that you really hated it. >> Apologize? Is that one? Can I say. apologize? >> Meaning when you. >> When I messed up and you were just like, "Can you just feel bad about not doing. something right?".

>> it. >> I know, that's your thing. But no, I. think. >> No, wait. Well, say you you screwed. something up, which didn't happen a lot. I mean. It did. We made jokes, but I got things. done. >> Yeah, you got things done. Yeah. >> But when things would go terribly wrong, uh. and I would say, "Oh, come on, Sona.". You'd say, "Yep, that happened." And you. would just plow ahead. >> All right. And so I would sometimes, I'm. just being honest, I would try to get. you to apologize or say you feel badly. about it, and you wouldn't. >> I know. I know. Okay, here's You know. what? >> that's a good answer. >> That Okay, so but also I'm trying to.

think of things I did regularly. >> Mhm. that I was just like every time you. would ask me to do I'd be like, "Oh, god.". >> Yeah. And you know what? Honestly, I. can't think of anything. I might need. some time with it cuz You liked shaving. my back? >> Oh, god. You enjoyed that? >> Oh, god. >> think you would. >> that out there. I don't want people to. think that was going to have Whatever. happened. >> You had the longest shaver in the world. She was on the end [laughter] of a pole. >> Like back? Oh, yeah. She would be maybe. 35 yd away from me.

>> gripper things? >> [laughter]. >> I was horribly cut up whenever you would. do that cuz you were often on your phone. while you were doing it. I know. I think. that you You're not a very. high-maintenance person. I don't think. so. >> I don't think you're high-maintenance. >> But now we switch it over to David, what. do you not like to do for me or it's. kind of a drag? Um [sighs]. >> Be honest. I mean, let's see. Where do I start? I think you know what? I Sorry, I just remembered. I don't know. if you have this, too. There's times.

when there's something you ask us to do. that we I think we know you can just do. on your own. And then I lived in Pasadena and you'd. be like, "Can you just come to my house. at 9:00 in the morning to help me with. this thing?" And I'd be like, you know. how to do that. >> Yeah. And it was usually And it was. usually how do I read my email? It was. usually how do I read my email? Uh-huh. Or how do I get into Netflix? Yes. You. can never get into Netflix. Now, in my. defense, >> [laughter]. >> in my defense, it's very hard to get.

onto Netflix. >> Yeah. Oh, yeah. >> next to impossible. You have to be a. brain surgeon. Although, I do want to. say I think I got hired because of. things Conan doesn't want to do, like. running the errands and things is why I. even. >> That's true. That's true. Yeah. >> My various creams and balms, ointments, and salves. >> So. >> Salves. Yeah. >> Emollients. >> Yeah. Uh gels. >> Yeah. So, I'm grateful for that. >> and it was job security. Like, you know. Well, I think I get one.

>> [laughter]. >> Oh, an assistant. Yeah, you get an. assistant. >> god, when you have an assistant, that is. the end. >> to start a nationwide search. >> That is the end of days. Um no, it's. uh I think yes, the tech stuff. I'm. constantly I don't belong should not be. living in this century. Mhm. >> I'm I'm it's like I'm I'm a I'm an 18th. or 19th century man. I I I think I would. have been uncomfortable in the 19th. century cuz they'd be like, "Hey, can. you pull that crank and make that. steam-powered thing work?". >> I cannot do it, sir.

>> drive to you. >> He is witchcraft. [laughter]. Talk to my assistant in a Pasadena. Pasadena? No one lives there. >> [laughter]. >> That's not inhabited yet. Look, in my defense, uh I abhor technology. I just and and so. yes, I think that's probably the worst. is when I call you up and say I don't. know how to take a picture with my phone. and then send it to someone. >> It's not that bad.

>> Which you've done a million but. sometimes you're in your head so much. about something you have to do that you. do forget very basic things. >> This this is something that Sona was. really on top of. She would always say. I'd call her up and I don't think to be. fair I don't think I would make you. drive from Pasadena to my house. >> do it often but there were times when. you know I would I'd have to be there. and that's my job. >> I didn't know when I was making a. sandwich if the bread goes on top. >> [laughter]. >> You forgot how a sandwich works?

>> Yeah, and I needed you to be here to. show me. So I was [laughter] like, get. here fast. Well, yeah and also I liked. going to your house. It's it's fun. there. It's pretty nice. >> Yeah. All those portraits of me. The statues in the yard. >> Yeah, I loved seeing that stuff. >> Yeah, me on horseback naked. Oh god. I'd. say shave the back of my statue. >> [laughter]. >> So and you know you know what's so crazy. is that. the. I would call you Sona and I would say I.

can't do this and you would say yes you. can. You have a phobia about it. Yeah. >> very intuitive and you would coach me. and I would realize that I'm very tech. phobic. And I will think I can't do. this. This isn't something I could ever. figure out in a million years and. because of you I do try a lot now before. I call anybody I try to see if I could. figure it out and then when blue foam. starts coming out of my device. [laughter]. I know it's time to get David on the. phone. I'm really proud of you. He. learned how to put things in his.

calendar on his own. Oh. Hey, you're. doing it. >> Yeah, we're it's like Oh, good job bud. >> we're talking about a a one-legged. turtle. >> [laughter]. >> That one-legged turtle. He learned how to make a poopy. Good for. you, Mr. Gibbles. [laughter]. I'll take it. All right, this is a. serious question. Would you, if my life was in danger, would you put. yourself between me and the danger, Sona? You know what?

Like would I sacrifice myself for you? >> Yeah. Would you sacrifice your life for. mine? >> I probably would have before I had kids. Now I won't. Now but I honestly there. were. >> You're fired. Oh. >> [laughter]. >> No, but I mean I was going to say that's. crazy. Well, no, but I also. >> What do you mean before I had kids? I. know I I'm not I'm not like secret. service. I'm going to jump in front of a. bullet for you. But I think that I would. have I. I think that the and I don't know if you. feel this too, the need to protect you.

and make sure you are good is more so. within the two of us than it is in a lot. of people. >> And I give you a lot of credit for that. because all joking aside, there were. times. when I was on tour in 2010. I remember I. think I was in. Eugene, Oregon and we did a show and. afterwards I said, "Hey everybody meet. me at this like there was a sculpture or. something of a big red wagon." I said, "Everybody meet me there." and I really. went there cuz I wanted to be kind of. like an Andy Kaufman happening and there.

was a huge crowd there and you were with. me but then. it was just so many people and I take. sucked into this crowd sucked into this. massive crowd and then. I saw you later back at the hotel and. you were freaked out and you were mad at. me. You were like, "I didn't know how to. protect you." and I said, "You don't. That's not your job in those situations. I I'm no but I'm that's my job in those. situations." But but you're very yeah, you've always Look, all joking aside, I.

love you and you've always been you're. you take really good care of me. >> Yeah. David not so much. >> Ah, there it is. Here we go. We were in. New York and you cut your head open. >> Excuse me, are you uh filing What are. you doing back there? Oh, sorry. If. [laughter] I could What the ARE YOU. DOING? WHAT THE are you doing? >> I'm getting all the I'm getting all the. ads ready for after this Yeah. >> right now? >> Yes, yes, I'm Okay, I keep trying to. remove paper from people. >> Gorely was doing it the other day and. now you are I think you're putting your. thesis together. >> I I I didn't realize you were at.

Princeton. >> have done this outside the studio. >> on the floor right now? Drop it. God damn. >> Sorry about that. >> I'm look I'm trying to talk to you guys. and he's over here. He's not going to. jump in front of a bullet for you. >> [laughter]. >> I guess what? I wish YOU WOULD. CUZ I'M HIRING that guy now. >> [laughter]. >> He's the one who's going to shoot you. Yeah, he's going to eat the bullet for. you. >> shoot me and jump in front of that. [laughter] bullet and all your papers. will go flying. >> it. I'm on it. >> Okay, here we go. David was saying when. David got here. No, I was going to say.

we were in New York at like one or two. trips ago and you I get a text from Liza. that you cut your head open and I ran to. a CVS and got you all the medicine, all. the Band-Aids. >> And you did. So that's I don't know. where I was going with that. >> did. Yeah, I walked into like a. low-hanging lamp cuz I'm a freak. >> Yeah. Uh. >> It's not meant for people of your. height. >> No, they like hung a lamp and they. thought don't worry, 99.9%. of the people won't hit this lamp with. the rusty corner. Yeah, it was bad.

>> I slammed into it and there was blood. shooting everywhere. >> like bruised. >> Yeah, yeah. But you you did go get a. bunch of poultices. >> I got everything CVS had. >> Various treatments, herbs, uh remedies. It was uh but would you, let's say, the. moment comes down to it and it's my life. or yours, would you make the ultimate. sacrifice? >> This is a crazy question. >> It's the You know what? This should have. been in the interview. >> [laughter]. >> Would you? I think that we really won't know until.

it happens. >> No, okay. Yeah, that's a good answer. >> time decision. Yeah. >> You just gave me your answer. >> [laughter]. >> What cafe are both of you working at. now? >> Yeah. You know what? I think one of we. do need to stay behind to let Liza know. you died. >> [laughter]. >> Yeah. This is so dark, but you're right. >> I mean, you know, how she going to know? >> And you know what? You'll both be. chomping on sandwiches when you go. >> [laughter]. >> Anyway, yeah, he didn't make it. But it's really bad And no, no. No,

[laughter] no. I want hummus on the. side. >> Okay. Hummus. Hummus. I said it correctly. >> I But why Why is it always hummus? I. mean, a lot of hummus. I do like I do. like it. >> sometimes you don't even have hummus, but you have it in your pockets. Yeah. >> You have hummus on you at all times. I. wish. I really wish. I wish it was like. a bowl and I was just dipping pita chips. in it all the time. Uh listen, I. uh you you guys are both fantastic. I. will say that. I'll deny it. I'm glad. this isn't being recorded. You're both.

fantastic. Oh, why are we recording. these? And let's get back to Blaze. shuffling papers noisily off camera. so that my ads are in the right order. when I read them 20 minutes after. we end this recording. Uh incredible. Thanks, both of you. Godspeed.