Halle Berry (FULL EPISODE) | Conan O'Brien Needs A Friend

My name is Halib [music] Berry. and I feel. still ghosted [laughter] about being. Conan O'Brien's friend. >> Wait, how did I ghost you? >> Ghosted me. >> When did I ghost? >> You never called me. >> Well, there are issues. [laughter]. My wife doesn't love it when I call you. Also, in my sleep when I yell Mary. repeatedly, she gets upset. >> [music].

>> Hey there. Welcome to Conan O'Brien. Needs a Friend. I am that Conan O'Brien. joined by Sonam Obsessian. Yep. >> And uh a little twist here. Not Matt. Gorley. >> Yeah. We got David Hopping sitting in. Good to see you, David. >> Great to see you. >> David is sitting in. This is very. exciting because I don't know when this. airs, but last night uh Matt Gorley and. his wife Amanda Yep. had a baby girl. Yeah. And so now they have.

>> two girls. They have their second uh. child and it's very exciting. We're very. happy for them. >> And um it crazy. They this uh Matt sent. us a photo this morning of Amanda. holding. >> Oh, I know. >> Uh his new daughter and um just Amanda. >> It enraged me. >> It enraged me, too. She looks like she's. had full hair and makeup and she hasn't. She's just that beautiful. She is. gorgeous. >> Gorgeous. >> Yeah. And look looks completely unfased.

by it and I it it made me angry. >> Yeah. It just I was I was very uh. >> I was like, "Good God, she looks. beautiful." Um they did put false. eyelashes on the daughter, which I. thought was weird. [laughter]. >> And press on nails. Those really long. ones. Yeah. >> I thought that was a little much. >> Yeah. The tanner, too. >> Yeah. And she's uh [laughter]. spray tan. I But um it's a beautiful. Sorry to interject. It's a beautiful. >> I didn't think you needed to come in. I.

honestly didn't think you needed to. interject. >> It's a beautiful photo. Well, I just. have to bring something up. It's a. beautiful photo of this of this lovely. little girl. And we all have a text. message, a chain going on with all of. us, and we're all saying, "Oh, she looks. great. She looks great." And then you. wrote, >> "That's the face Bla makes when he. levels up in Elder Scrolls 5.". >> Oh my god. >> Well, no, you you told the story. incorrectly. There was a [laughter]. Yeah, there's a second shot of just the. baby. >> Yes, that's what I'm saying. There was a. >> You didn't say that. >> Okay.

>> And And I'm just I I I I disagree with. everything you do and I want to go on. record. >> Why is that an important detail though? >> Because there was a picture of this. beautiful baby with this beautifific. smile. That's right. And I said to that, that's the face Blakes when he levels up. in Elder Scrolls 5. >> Yeah. So cleared that up. Yes. And I. just want to say you're right. Uh but. also I'm impressed. You know what Elder. Scrolls 5 is. Who did you ask? Please. ask. >> guys.

Guys, I know about all things. [laughter] And I I just like to I'm a. Renaissance man, okay? I don't go to. Renaissance fairs, but I am a. Renaissance man. Um, but let's get back. to the task at hand here, which is. congratulating. >> Matt and Amanda on their beautiful uh uh. little girl. >> Yeah. >> Nell, I believe is her name. That's. really nice. I was hoping it would be. Conanina, but I [laughter] think that. has yet to fly. >> Maybe the next one. >> Oh my god. >> Uh, no, that's very exciting. And so,

instead of Matt, we have David Hopping. David is uh my assistant. >> Yeah. And um you called me very excited. this morning because my flip phone came. through. I got a flip phone last year. when preparing for the Oscars because I. really wanted to focus and I don't want. to be constantly harried and harassed um. by the thousands of people that have my. phone number. So last year I got a flip. phone so I could really really focus and. I just only five people had the number.

and I could bury my other phone. And so. I asked you several months ago to. reactivate the uh the flip phone. >> and you're great, David. You do. everything the minute I asked. >> Thank you. Let's leave it there. >> You wouldn't do it. I kept forgetting. >> I kept asking you and you'd be like on. it and you wouldn't do it almost to a. pathological degree. Now, is it stupid? I could just turn off the other. functions on my phone. Is it stupid that.

I have a flip phone? Probably. But I. loved it. I love flipping it open. Okay. >> And I love looking like I'm trying to. get some math. I just love it [laughter]. >> or sell it. You know, it's a burner. phone. I like that maybe I could commit. a crime and then hit the highway and I'm. hard to trace. >> Mhm. >> So, I love this little blue flip phone. that I have. >> now. It's a black one because your blue. one stopped working. Okay. >> You just reactivate it. >> No, like the phone wouldn't turn on. >> Yeah. >> Oh, >> but you know what's interesting? Let's.

get to the issue here. the crux of the. issue. You wouldn't do it for the. longest time. And it got a little crazy. because I think I brought it up maybe. twice a week and you'd say, "Yep." And. then he just wouldn't do it. And I. thought. >> I kept forgetting. >> what really like you thought you had. like the sickest burn. You were like, "You're turning into Sona." [laughter]. >> Why did you say that with Sona here? Why. did you say Why did you say that with. Sona hair? >> Just trying to get the heat off of me. [laughter]. >> Well, you used to famously not do. things. >> I have a I have a point to make. I think.

you're changing the narrative a little. bit. Did he really do it twice a week? He did a week. No, you didn't. That's. the thing. You always change the. narrative to make the person seem less. >> How many times do you think I asked. >> over the last 3 to four months? >> Maybe like three or four. [screaming]. >> Absolutely [laughter]. not. Anyway, um Sona, you admitted in a. remote that you had a hard time doing. something that I asked you to do. What.

is it about you that makes people not. want to help you? Like the people who. are supposed to help you. >> I told him I never really understood. when you said you had a block about. assisting him until for whatever reason. this flip phone thing. >> Thank you. I think you're the problem. >> So the flip phone there was something. But as a as a licensed psychiatrist and. psychologist, I would like to dive in on. this. >> What was it about the flip phone? Because you've never done that before, but you really did dig in in your own. way. Go. >> Here's what I think it was. You got a. flip phone originally.

>> Great. It was working. For whatever. reason, the service stopped. >> The person who was setting up our phone, I think, had never seen a cell phone. before. I. >> think it was his first day. >> I think he snuck in the back uh. pretended to be working there. Well, anyway, we had a bad experience there. >> We were there so long that I was talking. to the guy trying to get the phone set. up and I couldn't see Conan and I look, Conan's just laying on a bench. [laughter] by the window there for more. than an hour and a half. >> Oh, no. and this person just looked. absolutely dumbfounded about how to give.

me a phone number and um and just. initiate the phone. So that's what did. it. We got burned there and that's why. you didn't you thought you'd have to go. back there. >> Yeah. The important thing is the phone's. working now. >> Yeah. That's the important. >> you have a new number. >> But you know what I'll remember is your. refusal to do it for such a long time. That's the part not the fact that now. it's here and I should be happy. What. I'll always remember is how long it. took. >> That is my illness. >> It is. >> And my talent.

>> And you'll bring it up in two years. >> Yes. >> And it's going to be something he may. have forgotten. Yeah. >> Because why would anybody remember that? >> I don't know why. I will uh I just never. forget when someone around me um screws. up. I just it it's with me forever. And. on my. >> I think on my deathbed and I hope this. is not for a very long time. Maybe I'll. even be comeomaos. But all of a sudden, when the end is very near, I'll just. start almost like I'm in tongues. I'll. start spewing all of the mistakes that.

I've recorded to exercise them from my. body. >> Yeah. >> And it'll be just. >> Don't people poop? You. >> I'm not going to do that. I'm going to. just be. >> Don't people poop? >> Oh, when they. >> When they die, >> you're That's your way of pooping. >> I don't think anyone does that. >> No, I think I think Don't they. >> Don't they poop a little? Isn't there a. poop? Death poop. It's a death poop. You're death pooping with But with your. words with the things that you're. holding in. >> No, I've never heard that. >> No one poops. Did I make that up? >> No, I've heard that. I thought your last.

I've seen two people die and you're. right. Neither one of them on it. [laughter]. >> Yeah. Neither one of them pooped. I saw. >> How did this change? How did you do. this? You totally effed up this. conversation royally. >> Effed it up. >> Yeah. We were solving this whole uh flip. phone issue and I was going to go into a. a great impression of me spewing out all. the. >> Oh, I'm sorry. >> No, it's too late. That's not happening. But now we are into death poop. [laughter]. >> This occurs because all muscles, including the sphincter muscles that. control bowel and bladder movements,

relax immediately upon death. The. release of waste is not guaranteed, but. it is a normal natural part of the. post-mortem process. >> Death poop. I'm right elimination. That's what it's never heard of that. I. think we should just end this segment. I'm really bummed out. >> Why? >> That was just to really bum me out. Death poop. [laughter] Uh, >> congratulations to Carly on his new. >> Yes. Hey, we were on death. What about. the creation of New Life? There'll be no. pooping there. >> Can I ask you a question? Were you upset. that when he if he if if I don't know if.

David apologized for it, but if he. apologized for it, were you upset if he. didn't mean it or that he wasn't beating. himself up over it? >> I like people to beat themselves up. over. >> I know you do. >> And you never would. YOU WERE JUST LIKE, "OH, YEAH." I'd be like, "Oh, that. medicine that keeps me alive, the heart. medication. >> Okay. >> Yeah. I just didn't get it. Big deal.". >> And you just wouldn't do it. You. wouldn't say, "Oh, I'm sorry, Con.". That's all you had to do. >> My god. In your world, you're just like. this. Like, I'm everything I do is so. nice and I need medicine and no one's. helping me. There's no evil.

>> There's no medication I'm on that is. necessary. [laughter] Nothing. Not a thing. But in my mind, I've turned. it into I need to have this. nitroglycerin pill [laughter]. or my failing heart will give. When. probably what I was asking you for was a. supplement. [laughter]. Where's my whey protein pill? Uh, all. right. Okay. My guest today is an. Academy Award-winning actress, you know, from such movies as Monsters Ball and.

Die Another Day. Now, you can see her in. the film Crime 101. Um, I'm in love with this woman. I'm. just going to say that right now. Halle. B, welcome. >> Conan, you have been one of my favorite. people ever. >> Oh my god. >> I think you know this like I'm not. saying. >> I can't take that in emotionally or. spiritually. >> True. It's true. >> You know, I will say this. >> It's really true. >> You were on the late night shows. You I.

think you nine times you came on the. show and it was always just fantastic. One of my favorite clips is at one point. we're going back and forth and then I. kind of fake diss you and you stand up. and walk out [laughter] and I leap to. try and I mean it's a talk show and I. leap [laughter] to like no come back and. you committed you like left but then you. came back [laughter] but it was such a. great moment and I have to say a lot of.

cool people a lot of very famous people. come in this building. things are a. little different today. >> So, I show up about an hour and a half. ago here in the building and everyone's. freaking out that you are coming and. these are people that see, you know, uh, big names all the time. Ted Danson does. a show here. He's a big deal. He comes. in and all of a sudden I heard all this. noise downstairs and I said, "I bet you. Hib Berry's here." And they said, someone said, "No, I think that's Ted. Dancing." And I went, "No, they're way.

too happy." [laughter]. And I love Ted Dancing and people here. love Ted Dancing. That's how off the. charts things were. So great to see you. You look gorgeous. >> as you always do. >> I'm going to warn you that uh sitting. next to you is a gentleman. >> who's got Listen, I think we have to. come out with this. >> It's full disclosure kind of thing. >> Full disclosure kind of thing. So let's. hear it. This is Matt Gorley. And Matt, why don't you confess your your love and. obsession? Well, [laughter] I just love. the Bond movies and so it's such a. pleasure to have a Bond girl in here.

like this and and um. >> also iconic Bond girl in my opinion. >> Very iconic. Very iconic scene. Jinx. Anyway, I'll shut up now. That's out. We've got it. It's taken care of. [laughter]. >> Why are your glasses fogging over? >> I don't know. Am I not in the shower. right now? [laughter]. >> Okay. Yeah. I would say between there's this I. mean you hit so many notes in your. career but you think about it there's. this intersection of Bond girl which.

means the world to so many people but. also X-Men. >> Storm and then all this crazy hardcore. legit movie roles and it all comes. together and you couldn't have planned a. career like that. Do you know what I. mean? >> Yeah, I know. I did not. [laughter]. It'd be scary if you did. >> It'd be scary. >> If you were like seven years old and you. had a chart [laughter] with different. intersecting circles and yarn, >> uh, that would have been cool. But no, that's not You know, it's so funny.

because I was thinking a lot about you. today as I do. [laughter]. >> See, I know you do. >> Your glasses are fogging. You're not. even wearing I don't have [laughter]. glasses. My retinas are fogging up. >> I'm getting glaucoma. >> I know you have never forgotten me, Conan. I have no [laughter] that one. does not forget you. >> I know this. >> Yeah. Um and so this was you know um. wait what was I just saying? I just my. my mind just you were thinking about. her. >> I was thinking about you today and I.

think about you [clears throat] and and. yesterday and then a couple of weeks. ago. >> Stop reiterating. [laughter]. Stop. Um I had this theory that very creative. interesting people and creative souls. are created by this in childhood not. quite knowing who they are meaning that. that that's where real creativity comes. from and I was just reading over your. whole life story which is really. something and you as a child.

were very dislocated in a lot of ways is. emotionally and I thought this is. looking. >> Yeah. [laughter] Yeah. But I mean but. Yeah. But I mean I think that's leads to. a creative soul. It's not always pretty. but I sometimes think that living a. completely normal happy childhood isn't. always the best recipe for being. creative. Do you agree with that? >> I do. I think so. I think having um.

always searching for something, for. love, for acceptance, for belonging, I. think does allow us to go really far. >> in our business. Yeah. >> You know, we're searching. >> Um I I'm still searching. I I think. that's the purpose of being here, right? If ever I figure it out, I think that's. >> when I'm in that box looking straight. up. [laughter]. >> Well, yeah. Yeah. I'm going to be buried. facing down. Um, >> I'm going to be burned up. [laughter].

>> I don't want to be in a box. Actually, >> I'll finally be out of a box. >> Yeah. [laughter]. >> When I die. >> So, you want to be burned up and then. put through like a snowblower and shot. all over [laughter] the place. >> All over everybody. >> That's Wow. Okay. >> That's what I want. So, that's my. family's getting when I die. [laughter]. >> So many people are going to turn out for. that ceremony. I'M COVERED IN HALIB. UM, [laughter]. this took a crazy turn. I didn't think. this was coming. Uh, but that's what.

just happened. Um, no, but I was. thinking about it. You. born to white mom, black dad, right? And. then not really much of a relationship. with your dad and this childhood of I. know your mom, you're in an took you to. an all-white neighborhood. So, there's a. lot of dislocation, I would think, and a. lot of like, wait a minute, what's going. on? I need to figure out who I am. >> Yeah. >> Your dad's family didn't want to have.

much to do with you guys. >> They didn't want to have much to do with. my mom. >> Yeah. >> Because she was white. But I was really. close to my grandparents. My dad's mom. and brother. But the thing the thing. about that kind of childhood was looking. like me, obviously being black, but. having a white mother, all girls, kids, you know, you want to be like your mom, right? But it it was painfully. impossible for me to be anything like my. mother, right? She was blonde, blue. eyes, like everything I wasn't. >> And your mom was born in Liverpool.

>> Yeah. >> That's I mean I never knew that. So your. mom doesn't even sound like you when. you're growing up. >> Well, she did because they came here. very early. So she didn't really sound. she kind of lost like her family really. you didn't still sound like that. But. >> we look nothing alike. and I could never. achieve that no matter I used I used to. walk around with like a yellow towel. around my head pretending I had blonde. hair, you know, I just wanted to be like. her. And so I felt um very confused. about my identity growing up. You know, even though we lived in an all black.

neighborhood, I still I wanted to be. like my mother. >> You know, I think that's a very natural. state of being and I never could be. And. I think that's um led to my feeling of, you know, not belonging and not really. knowing who I was. And if my mother's. white and I'm black, like what does that. mean? Who am I? Am I really black? Am I. half black? Am I mixed? Am I not mixed? I don't feel very white. I don't look. very white, but yet I have this white. mother. Like it's part of me. Like there. was a lot of confusion growing up. How. would I identify? And it was actually.

that white mother that really made me. realize. you are not white. Yes, you are half me. and you know and she knew I was proud of. that. But she told me, you will be. identified as you are. >> You will be perceived as black. You are. black and if you accept this part of. you, your life will be indelibly easier. because she saw me struggling to. identify myself some way. We all need to. identify with something, right? To feel. a part of something. And so I realized.

pretty around the middle school years. I I realized I was black and that was. okay that I didn't have a black mother. and that I would never be like her. That. I was I had a black fifth grade teacher. that helped me also realize you're. amazing just as you are. >> This fifth grade teacher was so. important to you. She became a big part. of your life. >> She did. Yeah. A big part of my life. She's now my kid's godmother and she's. still a part of my life. Yeah. >> That's amazing. >> Yeah. I do not have that relationship.

with my fifth grade teacher. [laughter]. >> Do you remember your fifth grade. teacher? >> I do. And I'm got the police looking for. her. Um [laughter]. >> what? Oh. >> yeah. No, no, I'm kidding. I'm thinking. fourth grade. Um [laughter] and you know. who you are anyway. Um we'll get into. that later. Meaning we'll never get into. that. Um, [laughter]. but you know, it's interesting cuz when. you when a when a kid that young, I. think, is struggling to figure out, feels offbalance with such an elemental.

thing at such an early age. >> They start looking. >> for. signals. They start looking for things. maybe harder than a kid who's completely. comfortable would. >> And for you, it's watching movies. You're you're watching movies. you're. watching, >> you know, whatever's going to come on. television or whatever you can see in. the theater. >> Yes. >> And and that's where kind of this begins. this this this road you get on, >> I think. So, we were latch key kids, you. know, my mom was busy working. She was a.

single mom, so she was always working. So, it was a lot of get home, let. yourself in, figure out your food, you. know, figure out your fun, do your. homework if you want to. [laughter]. You don't. You don't. >> It's all cool. [laughter] Uh yeah. So we. grew we were very independent, you know, and I also got into a lot of fights. growing up. I was busy fighting a lot. [laughter]. >> Physical fights. >> Physical fights. Yeah. Bullied. >> And you would fight back. Were you good. at fighting back? >> I I didn't fight back at first.

>> There's a story that uh really the. moment when I decided to fight, I was. one day. Do you want to hear this story? >> I do. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. >> Okay. So, one day I I was getting. bullied quite a bit and I would always. know that I was going to get my ass. kicked because they would come and tell. me after school, we're going to kick. your ass. And [laughter] I be like, "Okay, thank you.". >> Was this all. >> Thank you for letting me know. >> Was this all [laughter] because of the. color of your skin? >> That and I was not um still not like a.

shrinking violet. >> Yep. >> So, if you said something to me, I'm. going to say something back. >> Okay. >> So, that probably got my ass kicked a. [laughter] few times. >> Yeah. Yeah. But this one particular day, this um really tall, like this girl was. already like six feet tall in the in the. sixth grade [laughter]. came to me and said, "Yeah, you're going. to we're going to kick your ass after. school, just so you know." And I said, "Okay, sounds good. >> This is all very I love [laughter] that. it's like, can we schedule that in?". >> Yeah, >> I'll put it in my planner. >> Something at [laughter] 2:15.

I could do 240. 240 works. >> Ass kicking 240 kicking. [laughter]. >> It's a sixoot girl making me think, "Was. this you?" Yeah, I know. No red hair. >> Okay. >> Very funny. >> All right. >> And yes, [laughter]. go ahead. >> So, I get I'm on the bus. They're on the. bus. I know what's happening. I get off. and sure enough, she gets off and two. other girls get off. And then like three. boys get off, too. And I thought, that's. interesting. Get off the bus and sure. enough, I'm walking home, got my head. held low. I know it's coming. I just. don't know when the first thing the.

first hit's coming, but I know it's. coming. And out of nowhere, I just feel. like on the top of my head, that's how. tall she is. Just like boom. And I like. did like the wiggle down, you know. >> Yeah. Yeah. [laughter]. >> You You turned into an accordion. >> Became half of myself. Hit the ground. And when I was down there, >> she then ripped my shirt off. >> And then I realized why the boys were. there. [laughter]. They were going to see something. >> Yeah. >> Rip my shirt off. And I just have my.

little breast buds out. And the. humiliation was so great. >> and I felt I could not do anything. I. allowed this to happen to myself. I just. knew it was going to coming and I just. accepted it. I didn't know the stripping. of the clothes was coming, but it all. was just so terrible. And they all. continued, the boys included, then. laughing and kicking me until I ended up. in the sewer, which was like the open. water that ran outside of our house. We. were like in a little country suburb. >> And there I was in the gutter as they. ran off laughing. And when I got out.

that day, I that was the day that I. said, "No more. >> I am never going to accept that. somebody's gonna kick my ass." And I. said, "Okay, well then let's do that.". And that was the day I started fighting. back. And I didn't fight back. necessarily fight with fire. I decided I. was going to control everything at the. school, right? I was going to be because. part of the reason I was letting myself. get beat up is because I didn't feel. good enough. I didn't feel on par with. these kids, right? I felt like somehow. in some twisted way I deserved that or I. didn't belong there.

>> And I decided I'm going to be the class. president. I was going to be on the. honor roll. I was going to be the head. cheerleader. I was going to be the. editor of the newspaper. Like I did all. the things so that I could not be. denied. And through that, little by. little, respect grew for me and I felt. good about myself. And so therefore, I I. I felt that from everybody else. And by. the time I left that school, I felt like. I I was now running the I was like. in charge. And that's how I I dealt with.

feeling less than, allowing myself to be. beat up. >> There forks in the road where you know. that terrible experience you had. >> You things can get worse after that or. they can start to get better. Yes. And. you made this decision, all right, things get better now. >> Yep. Yep. >> That's what's going to happen. And. >> and those are pivotal moments in one's. life. And it was my fifth grade teacher, Ivonne, who was there to help me come up. with this strategy. She helped me. realize how I could, you know, leaving. the school wasn't an option. So, it was.

how could I fight back without going to. their level and using violence and, you. know, figuring out how I was going to. like murder all these kids. It was more. about how do you really fight back that. really will benefit you as you grow, not. just beat these kids. It's not about. these kids really. Well, also best. revenge is success, >> you know, having an amazing life and. being a superstar. >> Yes. >> Um, >> I'll get there. >> Um, [laughter].

>> I'll show you all. [laughter]. >> I'm real pretty. >> Um, your early. uh foray into being seen is in beauty. pageantss. Yes. you know, and so it's. interesting to me that which you were. very successful at. >> Are you successful in beauty pantry? >> You were you not [laughter] was it I. mean, how did you you took that route.

and then you're you're um you're being. seen that way, but you must have known, no, I've got this whole other. >> Yeah. I've got this this amazing tool. set that isn't even being utilized in me. just being in this pageant. >> Yeah, that's you know sometimes you kind. of fall into something you don't really. know how you got there. That was kind of. my story. I don't really know how I. Well, my boyfriend at the time entered. me in my very first one. >> because he wanted to have a girlfriend. who was a [laughter] queen.

>> A beauty queen. >> What the. >> He just want he just wanted that tiara. [laughter]. >> I want a tiara. >> So weird. They're expensive. >> Does that make him the king just by. [laughter] law? >> That's so weird. Yeah. I guess. >> the queen. >> That's a strange calculation. >> Yeah. Yeah. But um. >> so of course I show up, I get this. letter in the mail that says one day. you've been accepted to the Miss Teen. Ohio pageant. I was like, "Well, really? How did I get in that?" [laughter] He's. like, "Oh, well, I sent your your um. high school picture. I I sent it in for.

you." That was a good thing. So once you. got in, I got in. And the thing about. beauty pageantss, when you win one, then. you have to go to the next one. like. there's there's always a step next, right? So, I went on a string of winning. and every one I got into was just. because I'd won the one before. >> So, I had to go do the next one and you. had to go do the next one and then. finally I lost and it stopped. >> Yeah. >> And I went on to my life. But that. >> and you were never heard from again. [laughter]. >> I don't know who you are right now. Um. >> but it was a good way to start. I mean,

you know, I got to travel. I went to. every state in this country. Um which. was really good. And um I had to find. where the best bananas foster was in. every state that I went in before. internet. So that was a hard thing to. do. >> I had to find it in each city. I had to. find where they sold made the best. bananas [laughter] foster for our group. >> So I was very resourceful. >> Bananas Foster is is that have. caramelized? Is it the one you light on. fire? >> Light on fire. It's got bananas and.

brown sugar and rum and butter and. cinnamon and vanilla and you put it over. vanilla ice cream. You make a thing with. the cooked bananas. It's like. >> can we have or just some rum? [laughter]. >> Screw screw the banana and. >> I want that rum. Um, so there then. there's this leap I don't understand. which you go you go from that experience. to and I know there's a lot that must. happen in between but.

jungle fever spikely when does that how. does that happen? >> How does that happen? Well I because I. came from beauty pageantss I when I. realized um I was studying at Second. City and one of my teachers there said. you know you should be an actor and I. really didn't. I said really he said. yeah. Uh, so when I got this chance to. audition for Spike, it was to play his, you know, his girlfriend. And the thing. was, you know, pretty girl is his wife. And I was like, okay, that got me in. there. But when I got to meet Spike, I. said, I know you want me to read that,

but can I read the crack hole part? Can. I read the other part? And he was like, no, I don't. You're not the crack ho. I. said, I am the crack ho. [laughter] I am. the crack ho. >> No idea, Spike. >> I am the crack ho. And he. >> not crack. It's bananas foster. [laughter] That's my crack. But it's. still the same idea. So, how did you. convince him? >> I just said, you know, I I am really. more than the pretty girl. I really I. want to show you that. Let me audit. Let. me go. He goes, okay, go in the. bathroom, wash all your stuff off and. maybe I can see you as the cracko. So, I.

did that and I came out and then I got. to audition for that part and he was. like, you are the cracko. [laughter]. >> Congratulations. >> Ultimate compliment. >> You won. You get the crack. >> You know, I'm getting cracko right now. [laughter]. >> Congratulations. Queen the crack ho, >> you know, that's that's like [laughter]. a journey. >> But I also knew if if I was going to. really be doing this thing seriously, I. felt like I needed to come out of the. gate being more than. >> speaking of boxes, I did not want to get.

put in that box. Yeah, >> but I think if you look back at the. trajectory you already had and what you. had been dealing with. um because you had had to fight all. those battles, you're in a situation. where most people are just thrilled to. be in the Spikely movie, right? Do you. know what I mean? And. >> Pretty Girlfriend in the Spikely movie. is just fine. Thank you. But to be in. that situation say, "No, actually over. there is where I think I need to be.". director, writer, director, oure that it.

all comes from this, it goes back to. this same idea, discomfort. Um, a feeling of being unsettled as a. kid. I think that builds this. >> this strength. >> and where you're not going to do that. I. want I need to be over there. Even if. maybe people around you were saying, don't rock the boat. You know, this is. the part you could have. >> Yeah. And I knew being a black woman, you know, it's the bottom.

It is really the bottom. >> And you have nothing to lose only to. gain by rocking the boat. >> and demanding more and asking for more. and being loud about it. >> You have nothing to lose because you're. already at the bottom. >> And that's really how I felt. It's. unbelievable that. I'm going to skip ahead to Monsters Ball. for which you win an Oscar and it's a. historic Oscar. It is a seinal moment in.

like film history. It's it's a big. moment. When you see that part, do you. think this could be huge for me? Did. that resonate with you or did you go. into it thinking, "Oh, this is another. part I can play and I'm going to do And. were you maybe it was hard to see how. far this could go? >> Yeah. I can't say I thought Oscar. I. don't think anybody can think, oh, this. is going to be an Oscar. You I don't. know if you think that. That's like. insane. But I felt like this was either.

going to be one of the best things I. ever did or it would end my career. [laughter]. >> Yeah. >> But that's where I like to live on that. edge of risk big, win big. I have known. you cannot win big if you don't risk. big. And if you don't even try, you're. surely going to lose. So people around. me said because at that time I hadn't. done nudity and the sex scene was like a. big like it had a big. red light on it sex scene like it was. such a big part of that movie that. people close to me said you know this.

could really be you know. >> this could hurt you this could really. hurt you this could not be a good thing. and it was a little small movie no money. it's like a little indie like it could. be all for nothing right and I had the. feeling that I I related to the. character. I wanted to play the part and. I said. >> if this ends my career then I'm ending. my own career on my own beliefs right no. you know it's what I wanted to do and if. that's the case then then I I have a. knowing then that's what it's meant to. be and this this isn't for me then.

>> right I I I have a knowing of that that. if it ended it then I'm I'm in the wrong. place and it would be the universe. showing me to move or where to go right. I didn't I didn't think that there could. be a negative no matter what how it. turned out. >> Also, as you just said, you have that. I've, you know, I've got nothing to lose. here. It's a great attitude. >> It's a great attitude, which you came,

you come by that the hard way. You come. by it very honestly, but. >> it's such a, you know, >> and you know, position of strength. Yeah. >> Yeah. when and when you really believe. that and I do, I can still sit here 30. years later at 60 this year not afraid. to do anything really cuz I still feel. that way. >> Yeah. >> I have nothing to lose. Nothing. And. that is a really empowering feeling. And. that has allowed me to try many. different things over my career. Didn't. always win, but it didn't mean I lost. It didn't turn out the way I wanted it.

to. Yeah. >> Yeah. But it didn't mean I lost. I'm. still here, you know? It's just like, "Okay, well, that didn't work. [laughter] Let's try something." You. know, it it it it doesn't nothing can. level me, >> right? >> I say that to young people. >> You're already out down there. >> Yeah. I say that to young people all the. time, which is uh I tell them, "You. don't get dinged as much as you think. you will be for failing. >> And in order to get it right, you need. more shots on goal, right? So, you have. to keep trying.". >> Well, now you're getting into sports,

and I don't know what you're talking. about. [laughter]. >> I don't know either. I just I don't know. what that means. >> Someone help me here, Matt. Oh, forget. it. [laughter]. >> No, not me. >> There's no one here. Oh, Edward. Great. analogy. >> Okay, what shots on goal meanactly? [clears throat]. >> You need more a chance. You have to keep. trying. >> So, there's a ball of some kind. Look, [laughter]. this interview is over. Completely lost. me. Um, [laughter and gasps]. >> I uh you know that moment, I still. remember that moment when you won. And. like I say, it was a historic win. the.

first uh you know it's so funny because. I was writing notes h you know like I. write notes and I can't always read my. own handwriting. I was writing them real. fast and ideas and stuff and then I. wrote down on a piece of paper like. yesterday I was thinking about you. coming and what I wrote was supposed to. say first um uh black person to win best. actress and what I wrote was first woman. to win best actress. [laughter].

And of COURSE, I'M WRITING REAL fast and. I just drop. And then this morning, I'm. licking it over and I'm like, "Wow, first woman to win best actress. >> That's amazing. >> How did she pull that off?" [laughter]. But, um, you know, it's so interesting. cuz that was such an electric moment and. so real because you really, I don't. think, had thought that might happen. Um, and you. >> That's my right. for sure I wasn't. because back then the the Golden Globe. was the precursor and I didn't win the.

Golden Globe. So that was the night I. knew, well my my chances are over. This. has been fun though. This little movie. that they thought could have leveled me. got me this far. Like that I it was. done. Then one of my only memories of. that night actually is Russell Crowe. When I walked up to get my Oscar, he saw. that I had left the building and he just. looked at me and he was like, "Breathe. mate. Just breathe [laughter] mate. You. got to breathe mate. I was with him in a lama class and. [laughter] that is exactly how he.

sounds. Um that is I mean. >> and it woke me up to I got to breathe. and I got yeah I got to turn and I got. to talk to these people. >> You're a very spiritual person and I've. always known that about you whenever I. talk to you. I mean there is an aura. around this woman there. you have this. uh you're connected to something that. cannot be explained and I know that. you've talked about having this. life-changing experience in India. Were. you were you like on a soularching. mission when you went to India and were.

you talking to a shaman? Were you. talking to like a religious figure? What. happened? >> How do you know about that? >> I've been following you [laughter]. know about this Conan. You know that. weird lady that you always see about six. about 9 ft behind you [laughter]. scribbling in a notebook, first women. woman to win best actress. [laughter]. >> Can you believe a woman won best. actress? [laughter]. >> You're not even accurate. >> No. Um.

uh I I was just reading all this stuff. about you and you it said that you had. this great life-changing moment in 2017. and it sounded kind of fascinating. I'm. a skeptical person, but I'm also in a. weird way not a skeptical person and I'm. very much interested when someone else. has an experience like that. I want to. know what happened. >> Okay. Well, I yeah, I was there on on a. on a on a thing and I decided to go to. after we left Mumbai, I wanted to go to. this wellness center in Kerala. So, I. did and there was a shaman there and he.

took me and my group. We were there at. like the end of our week. He took us all. out to meditate like right on the edge. of the ocean and you do it at like 3:00. in the morning when all the high. priestess and the Buddhas are. meditating. It's the highest vibration, right? So, we're out there at the edge. of the ocean. We're on our mats. I have. like four people with me. We start. He. said it's going to be a long meditation. Like, we're going to go 3 4 hours into. it. So, we're in it. We're in it. I'm. going to be about an hour in. I'm still. in it, but I just kind of kind of look. around. All my people are like, [laughter]. >> they're no longer. >> Are these friends of yours or is it like.

agent, manager, accountant? [laughter]. >> No, they're friends of mine. >> I'm just picturing me bringing Rick and. Gavin. >> Oh my god. You know, [laughter]. >> Michael Carlin, all these guys in suits. >> All right, everybody. Let's get in the. Lotus position. [laughter]. >> I don't even They're on their phones. [laughter]. >> But anyway, so so these are friends. >> They're friends. >> and they're not having it. They're. >> They're like, "It's too damn early. They're sleeping." But I'm still in this. meditation. So finally he comes to me.

and he says, "For the last hour, I want. you to put your eyes at, you know, like. 20%." just so you can kind of see but. you know stay in your meditation. So he. keeps guiding me and talking. So all of. a sudden he starts to walk in front of. me and he walks to the edge of the ocean. and I sort of see him out there but I'm. in my my state and I'm meditating doing. what I'm doing. >> and I look and I see that there's a. shadowy figure that comes to him and I'm. thinking where did that come from? It. looked like it came out of the ocean. [clears throat] but I'm thinking while.

I'm in the meditation well how could. that be? Like what what would come out. of the ocean? Is that an alien? like. what what am I seeing here? So it stays. out there for a while and about 20. minutes later he starts to walk back. towards me and that person or that. figure just kind of goes away and I. thought now what now what the hell is. that? Who was that? Right? So when he. when the meditation is over he says so. you know what happened and I said to him. what I just saw and he said oh yes it's. what I thought come with me. So he takes.

me into a little room and he said you. know what just happened out there. I. said, "No idea. Where did that man or. that person wear that thing come from?". And he said, >> "That was your third eye opening. You. saw my aura.". >> He said, "Was it black?" I said, "Yep.". He said, "That was my aura. You now are. in the club of your third eye opening. And there's a good there's positive and. there's negative to this third eye. You're going to see so many things you. couldn't imagine you would see. You're. going to understand things instantly in.

a way you never used to before. But the. bad part is the negative is you're going. to have to act on it and that's going to. get you in a lot of trouble. >> That's going to make you uh unpopular. It's going to have you um have a really. hard time in relationships with people. A lot of them will come and go as a. result because you will no longer be. able to be silent when you know. something or you see something or you. feel something. And I said, even if I. try not to say anything, he said, you.

will see. You will not you will not be. able to be quiet. And Conan, >> that is the thing that [laughter] has. happened. >> since that time. I can [clears throat]. no longer be quiet. And people have come. and gone as a result. I have ended. relationships as a result. Like. seemingly out of nowhere. >> because I saw the truth of the. situation, right? And there's sometimes. when I see the good in a situation and I. go down a path and I embrace something. that everybody's like, "What? you're.

doing that. I'm like, I see it. This is. going to be great for me. I see it and. it turns out to be great. So, I've. learned to trust that this third eye, this thing I have, it's real and I got. it and I just trust it. Now when someone. leaves or I tell someone, you know, this. this is done or I stand up for myself or. I switch my management or I change. whatever I'm changing, I now have a. knowing that there's this other force. that there's this eye that I'm seeing. clearly for myself. Can't see for you or.

anyone, but I can see clearly for myself. and I and I let it guide me. Well, this. is why I ghosted you because [laughter]. I realized you had that you had that. third eye and I I couldn't handle it. I. [clears throat] just. >> You don't want to ghost me, Co. [laughter]. >> Now I'm terrified that I did ghost you. >> You don't want to ghost, [laughter]. >> but it it's um. >> You don't want to ghost me. >> I This is something that I've come to. realize at my age, and I'm I'm a bit.

older than you. Uh but I. I like it now. I just realized, you. know, we have this culture that just uh, you know, glorifies being young and. being young was great, >> but I. just feel like things make more sense to. me now and I know myself now. >> and I feel like a little bit that's what. you're describing. I I can't say I've. had that profound a conversion, but I've.

had a subtler feeling of. yeah, there's, you know, there's some. aches and pains now when I. >> do my weird comedy moves, but I I enjoy. this period now more than the intensity. um and I don't know, kind of sometimes. maniacal misdirection of 20s, 30s, 40s. This this feels. >> it's a calmer place to be. I I I I describe it by saying I have.

zero to give anymore [laughter]. about things and what people think or. how they feel about the choices I make. or what I'm doing or how I'm doing my. life, you know, and that is a really. empowered place. >> to be able to say, "Hey, and I know you don't care that much. about me anyway, so why do I give so. much energy to what you're thinking. about me or making choices that satisfy. you or make you h like, you know, that's. a really good place and I can't say I. was always there. I've been the dancing. bear and I've been trying to make. everybody love me and like me and you.

know fit in and it's really that that's. exhausting when you go through life that. way. >> Yeah. And also this profession. >> Yeah. >> is it is a profession that. >> and it's about how much am I being liked. at this moment versus that other moment. versus the next moment. And it can get. in your head. >> Yeah. And when you can really. not care, like really don't just say you. don't care. When you can really not. care, >> not care, [sighs].

>> that is like a really powerful place to. be. >> I can't say I have zero to give. I. have like three to give. >> Okay. What are what are your. [laughter]. >> I want to know what Conan's. >> I mean, I believe I can have sex three. more times [laughter]. >> in your life. >> In my life. >> Yeah. I mean, I've been to a doctor and. he said, "I think you got three three. left." And he did measurements and. things and he said, "There's three left. here.". >> Yeah. No, it's true. I said, "Can I get. a new cartridge?" And they're like, "No, [laughter]. you are out of ink." So, I'm being very.

careful with how I use them. [laughter]. >> Um, God, >> I'm sorry. Al's like, I haven't seen Con. in a while, and I now know why. [laughter]. Yeah, she read your aura. >> Yeah, you read my aura. I'm like, what. made you go? >> I know. >> Uh, let's talk about Crime 101. You made. this film with Chris Hemsworth, Mark. Ruffalo. These are fantastic people, I. would think, to. >> Oh my god. Fantastic. >> Fantastic.

>> Yeah. And it's just sounds like a really. fun movie. It really does sound fun. >> It's very adult, too. You know, I I. think we sometimes I I I've got two. kids, so I've I search to find adult. themed movies. Yeah. You know, I've had. two decades of, you know, uh cartoons. and animated movies. And it's really. nice to be a part of making a real adult. sort of a throwback of heat and like. very. >> um. >> it's kind of got a gritty LA.

>> Gritty LA. It's like a love letter to. LA. We never get to shoot in LA. I'm so. happy working here. go to work and come. home like normal. >> That's no small thing to shoot in Los. Angeles because everybody is now, you. know, they're in like whatever they're. in Greenland and they pretend that it's. I mean they will be once we own it, but. boy they're in I'm looking into it. Um. >> you're going to buy it. >> We're going to move our once we conquer. Greenland. I'm moving the podcast studio. there. >> Um you're going to love it. Uh lots to.

eat. Um. >> lots [laughter] to eat. >> Not a wide variety, but there's a lot of. it. Uh, I've been there, you know. I did. a show there. I did a show there. So, I. know. Yeah. I I went to Greenland uh. when this a couple years ago. >> The first time. >> Yeah. The first time very. >> the first time our president was talking. about Greenland. I went there to check. it out and talked to a real estate agent. and walked around and it's you can see. it all uh on one of our travel shows. But um yeah, it was uh it was a profound.

experience. But um I was saying that. most you don't take it for granted. because nobody shoots much in Los. Angeles anymore. >> No. >> And so to shoot an LA movie about LA and. this sounds like a joke, but if someone. shoots a movie that's a love letter to. LA these days there's a 90% chance they. are shooting it in the Netherlands. Do. you know what I mean? And then they just. throw some palm trees in there. So it's. amazing that you got to do that. really. got to shoot it here and it makes all.

the difference in the movie, too. You. feel like you're, you know, where you're. supposed to be. >> Yeah. >> And I got to see my kids every night, which was I'm about to go to France to. work. I will not be seeing my kids every. night. And that's always a, you know, that's how it's what it's become, you. know? >> Yeah. Can they go with you or it's just. too hard for them? >> It's hard. You know, they're at the age. My daughter is about to She's 18 next. month. She's going to college. She's got. her own things to do. >> She's like, "No, thank you, mom." Yeah, >> my son's 12. He'll probably come because. his dad's French. He speaks French, so.

he likes France. So, he'll probably come. >> for a little bit. >> When my kids turned 18, they said, "We. never want to see you again. [laughter]. This has been nice. It's been real." Way. too many bits every day in the kitchen. Uh my daughter's 22 and my son's 20. >> Oh, wow. >> So, they uh they're off in school and. doing their own thing and constantly. >> And h how did you feel? I'm I'm I'm. dealing with my daughter leaving. How. did you feel? Did you. >> I'm someone who can get very.

disconnected from how I feel. Meaning. I'm really good at sublimating things. and pushing it down. So I think um. uh my daughter when she left cuz she was. the first and she's like my little girl. and then suddenly she's going off into. the world. I had a hard time with it. And then I think I convinced myself that. well my it's my son. I won't feel my you. know and I kind of spiraled when he when. he left cuz I realized that uh that I. had deni I was in denial a little bit.

and then it hit me hard. >> Um. >> and when she left, did she leave town? She went. >> Yeah. Yeah. They both went away to. school. Uh and but my agent says they're. doing very well. [laughter]. I can't talk to those kids. Impossible. Uh no. Uh they're they're it's tough. It's a huge adjustment. I mean, you. know, you're going through this, you. know, about to have uh a a second child, >> a daughter coming in a week or so.

>> Oh my god, you're starting. >> I know. It's really late. >> And Sona has. >> It's my second. >> Your second. Okay. >> Sona has twins. >> Twins. They're young. They're four. They're like four and a half. I mean, they are four and a half. I'm not Yeah. I don't know why I said it like that. [laughter]. >> You're a strange person. Um but that's. that's uh. >> you don't think and then when it happens. >> it is very surreal. It's very surreal. and then when they call you and say how. did it happen? >> How did it happen?

>> Like it doesn't it seems like just. yesterday she was this little thing. >> looking at me like I'm a jelly bean. [laughter]. >> and now I'm just like. >> No. When they say like I'm [laughter]. going to h Yeah. Broccoli's good. It's good for you. >> It's good for you, but like, you. [laughter] know, I know I'm good for. her, but it's it's it's it's it's hard. to come to terms with. Like, they're. >> It's very hard. It doesn't make any.

sense. Uh I to me, the most surreal. thing is when one of them says, "Okay, I'm going I'm going to hop a plane." Hop. a plane? >> Yeah. No, you know, I'm gonna I'm gonna. go grab the uh you know, the Delta. flight and and go flying to another part. of the country and I'm gonna then go do. my own thing. >> And I think, well, who's going with you? You know, is your mother going with you? >> Who will show tend to you to make sure. that you get to the bathroom? You know, and [laughter] it's I've just completely. lost my mind.

>> Just because you turn 18, one day you're. 17 and one day you're 18. So, how much. more do you know just because you turn. 18? >> Right. Right. >> You're the same. >> Right. [laughter] Right. >> So, she is going to be 18 and she's. like, "Well, I'm going to do all these. things I want to do now because I'm 18.". But you were just 17 the day before. [laughter]. >> Right. >> Just cuz this little arbitrary click. [laughter]. >> It's a good point. Now I'm more. terrified. >> I know. I'm terrified. >> It's terrible talking to you.

>> But you're past that part though. I'm. past I'm past. >> past 21. >> No, you're never past. It's what this. goes back to the very beginning of the. conversation. You said you never stop. >> putting yourself out there. You never. stop feeling like I need to grow. You. never start stop being a little afraid. That just doesn't stop. >> The good news and the bad news. >> And these things don't stop. I think. >> if I get to if I get to live a really. long time and my kids I get to see my. kids be, you know, in their 40s or 50s,

>> I'll still be stunned that they're. headed out the door to go do something, you know, and that, you know, that we're. not with them making sure everything's. okay. It's it's always going to be the. way. It's just [laughter] that doesn't. go away. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. I don't think so. >> Are you still having like on this movie, Crime 101, you're working with these. fantastic actors? Are you still in it. having fun after everything you've been. through, all these successes and. everything? You still there enjoying it. in it?

>> I love it. Yeah, I still do. >> Sometimes I joke with my friends and. think I go to work for a break. [laughter]. >> because parenting. >> is hard, you know? It's hard work. And. when I get to go do a movie, I just have. to think about myself. I don't have to. think about anybody's clothes, what. they're eating, what they're doing, driving to a soccer game, picking them. up. My daughter goes to school all the. way downtown. Like it's a trek. It's an. hour and a half almost each way. And you. do that, you know, twice a day. You're. looking at a six hours out of your day. just school driving, you know? So.

>> when I go to do a movie, it's like it's. just me time, right? I don't care if. it's 16 hours a day, six days a week. I'm just focusing on me and that feels. like a break. >> Do you find your choosing roles where. your character is like taking a lot of. bubble baths? [laughter]. Bubble Bath and Chocolates the movie. [laughter]. I'll do it. It's really not a good. script. There's no plot. There's no. character development. I'll do it. [laughter]. That's what I would do. It's like Adam.

Sandler does that every movie. It's like. he's in Hawaii. [laughter] He's at a. great resort. Oh, and look, he's having. a a Sunday. And [laughter]. um well, this has been an absolute. delight. You've lit up our whole. building. Everyone's thrilled you're. here. And uh I adore you. I think you're. amazing. You're just such a great, honest, cool person to talk to. >> Uh and I'm just so happy you could be. here today. >> I'm happy to. And I legit mean you have. been always one of my very favorites.

Every time I've gotten to come, we've. had we have so much fun. >> We have so much fun. Um. >> it's been easy. And it hasn't, you know, you don't always feel that from. everybody. So I feel you just as. >> genuine. Well, I'm crazy about you. So, um, I'm just delighted you're here and. it all it's all it's all good. I'm just. very happy. >> Thank you very much. Thanks for having. me. >> You take care. >> Thank you. >> I'm going to ghost you again now. [laughter]. >> And if I see something, I'm telling you.

>> It's currently uh January, February, beginning of the year. Earlier last. year, we never scheduled it. It fell. through the cracks, but we were going to. do a white elephant Christmas party. suggested by Eduardo. >> and uh I purchased something. [laughter]. >> This is a year ago. You purchased. something? >> Well, no, last year. >> Okay. >> In December.

>> And our What did we say our price was. going to be? $30 to $40. >> Yes. >> I spent about $100 this thing. >> I just couldn't pass it up. And I don't. want to oversell it, but I'd like to. just bring it. >> Is it a gift for one of us? >> It would have been if we did the white. elephant. You know what I mean? You. know, >> if I like this thing, can I have it? [laughter]. >> Well, let's just see. >> It's like a prop comic.

[laughter]. >> OH MY GOD. >> OH [screaming]. [laughter]. WOW. >> Talk to me. What's happening right now? >> I don't think I need to say a thing. I. think this says it all. >> Oh, >> yeah. Does it? Well, if you're watching. uh a video right now, >> then yes. But let me describe for anyone. who's not. You've just put. >> basically they've turned a disco ball. into a motorcycle helmet is what it. looks like. >> Vice versa. Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. I saw this and I just knew that. this was the thing and I was just hoping.

it was in the price range and it wasn't. And then I left [laughter] and then I. went back and got it. So this. >> and then we cancelled it. [laughter]. and I was stuck with this thing. But now [gasps and laughter] I'm kind of. glad that. >> I love that you so this is there's so. many things that are perfect about this. You bought this as kind of a gag for a. jokey thing that then got cancelled. It. didn't happen. You now have what appears. to be a disco ball on your head,

[laughter]. >> but complete with a strap with a little. clicker so that you can strap it on. >> It can't be street legal. >> Anyone behind you with their brights on. [laughter] is going to be killed. immediately by las by lasers. So, no, you can't be driving that down the. street. What? Um, you said a store had. this. Now, it looks like something that. you would buy uh on a site. It doesn't. look like something that would exist in. a store. >> No, not only that, but there are two of. them. And I seriously consider getting. two of them so that when somebody got.

this and it went crazy in the white. elephant, I could pull out a second one. and go like, how much? You know, >> you you thought we would all like want. [laughter] it and fight over it and. stuff and then we would pay you like. more than market value. >> I was gonna I was gonna make a mint. [laughter]. >> So. >> you look. >> Tell me about the store. >> Tell me [laughter]. sometimes. Sona with. >> You see this thing on with your jacket? >> Oh my god. >> Oh, this jacket's too cool, No,

you wear that. >> Matt, talk to us about the store where. you where you bought this. I'm. picturing, you know, in the 40-year-old. Virgin when uh [laughter]. >> when they go into a store that just. sells stuff from eBay. >> and um who is it who wants to buy uh. >> Jonah Hill wants to buy those those. >> wants to buy those those high heeled. platform shoes that have a goldfish in. them. >> Um I'm picturing it's that kind of. store. >> It was a vintage store in Santa Barbara.

on State Street. >> Vintage. >> Yeah. And so there was all kinds. >> So people were dicks long ago. [laughter]. >> Hey man, I'm disco fons. >> This is good to remember that people had. terrible ideas. >> 40 years ago cuz someone's making these. and there's, you know, like a couple of. them. It's new. So I mean, make an. offer. [laughter]. >> Make an offer. >> Yeah. >> Okay. >> Yeah. >> I'll pay you not to not to have it. >> Yeah. [laughter] My offer is you can.

work somewhere else if you like. That's the offer I have for you. You're. a dad and uh soon to have uh two kids. >> Um they might like it when dad wears. that. >> No, my daughter responded just the same. way you guys did. [laughter]. >> She lost respect for you. >> She bet zero. >> Did she say zero already? >> Did she How old is she now? >> Four. >> She's four. And she said, you know, it's. uh trying to be meta and arch, but it's. a little too much and a little too.

self-consciously twe. And you're like, "Wow, [laughter]. you said in a second what Conan's been. trying to tell me for seven years.". >> So, so, um, you didn't buy two. >> No. >> Okay. If you had another one and you put. one on Sona, too, and you went outside. where there's sunlight and you aimed. your helmets at each other, you might. both go back in time, [laughter]. you know? >> Or you might freaky Friday just switch. bodies. Yeah. No, I I know what you. mean. >> Bodies. I don't know. [laughter].

>> That would just be weird. It's just. absurd. I'm so I'm kind of glad we. didn't do white elephant. >> cuz you could have ended up with this. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Have you done a lot of white. elephants? It was not a thing in my. culture growing up. I think it feels. like it's something that's more in life. Yeah. >> British Brit I think the it's it's Is. that right? >> I don't know. I have no I I did white. elephants with my friends. >> My family now does them in lie of. individual gifts cuz our it's just too. big. It' take too long. So we just do a. big white elephant. >> But also it can get really mean. >> It can. Yeah. I would think I we should. do it this coming year because I imagine.

you'd get pretty ruthless. >> Yeah. >> No. What are you talking about? Kind. >> soul, you know. >> Yeah. But also, you know what I could do. is even if I lose out in the game, um. when the segment's over, I could just. say, "And now I want all of the gifts.". >> And you'd have to do it. >> I have to give them to you. >> Of course you do. Why? Yeah. I'm a. ruthless dictator here. >> Yeah. [laughter]. >> I'm the Maduro of podcasts. Uhoh. Oh, >> why do you think I'm so [laughter] I'm. always hiding?

>> Any minute now, they're going to come. take me away. >> Hey, Duardo, is there any way to like. dim the lights, but just get a spot on. this baby? I know. I didn't. >> Should I use my phone? >> Just start hitting buttons over there, Adam, and then watch what it does to the. room and then see what. >> Do you want to try to hit the Will the. that red light. >> turn all the lights off? >> It'll turn off all the lights. >> That's okay cuz Sona's got. >> Is it worth doing putting this much. effort into it? >> Oh, yes. Yeah, this is big. This is Sona. does say that about everything. Someday. when they're someday they'll be doing. CPR on me and Sona will be saying, "Do.

we really need to put this much effort? [laughter]. >> They're doing CPR on you. Some of my best jokes happen in the. dark.". >> All right. Now, now I'll entertain. offers. Okay. Um, that was spooky. [laughter]. IT DID FEEL like I was in a strip club. that closed and I'm [laughter] still. there and I'm there for the food. So, there's no there's no ladies anymore and. they're not even serving drinks, but I. just can't get enough of that beeferoni.

[laughter]. >> Hi, I'm I'm Rosco. I'm the lighting. designer and stripper allin one. [laughter]. >> Oh my god. >> I You know what? I think that's one of. those gifts that's going to pay. dividends, you know. So, >> it is. >> Yeah. >> Okay. >> Yeah. Even I doubt that. I just know not. to pick your gift next before we. actually do this. >> I know. Well, then you don't know whose. gift is it. >> That we used to do white elephants and. one of my friends forgot a gift. So, he. went back to his car and got Taco Bell. sauce packets. And I would rather have.

the Taco Bell sauce packets than that. disco ball helmet. And you'd say that. even if you were at a Taco Bell. [laughter]. >> and there was just and you're surrounded. there just bins of them and still you're. like you can have more of these free. things that surround you or that disco. ball helmet. [laughter]. >> Uh. >> yeah. No, I like White Elephant though. It's fun. We should do it next year this. year. Yeah. >> Yeah, we'll do it. >> And will you shop or will you just have. David go find you something? >> That's a terrible thing to say. People. act like I live in some kind of bubble.

Um, once CO's over and stores reopen, [laughter]. I'm sure David will show me where these. quote stores are and I will go to one. and talk to a purveyor. Um, all I ask is that you wear that on. the ride home and that you lower your. windows as you head into Pasadena. >> Running on a motorcycle. No need. [laughter]. That's definitely a Vesa. You need to be. on a Vespa for that.