Dustin Hoffman Part I (Full Episode) | Conan O'Brien Needs A Friend

Hi. My name is Dustin Hoffman and I would. feel great about being Conan O'Brien's. friend if we ever hung out and he has. not called yet. [laughter]. >> To be fair, Dustin, I call you many. times. Someone who sounds a lot like you. picks up the phone. When I identify. myself, that person says he's not here. >> [laughter]. >> And then hangs up. >> Here, you can call me. I literally don't. >> ring ring. Hello, is Dustin there? This. is Conan O'Brien. >> WHO IS THIS, PLEASE?

>> [laughter]. >> THAT'S THE PERSON. >> I AM HIS HOUSEKEEPER. HE HE IS NOT HERE. HE IS IN BATHROOM. >> OKAY. >> [laughter]. >> I'm going to call cut on this right now. >> [music]. >> Hello and welcome to Conan O'Brien Needs. a Friend, joined by Sona Movsesian. >> Hi. >> And of course Matt Gourley. >> Hi. >> And I am the aforementioned Conan. O'Brien.

Uh I want to right up top say that uh. apparently Sona has had a life-changing. orgasmic experience. >> You are glowing. >> You are glowing. >> person. >> Right now. Tell us what happened. >> So, three of my best friends and I went. to Vegas this past weekend and we met. New Kids on the Block. >> And this is your group. I mean, you've. talked about this for a while to me over. the years. >> These are my homies. So, me, Christina, Veronica, Angina, we went to.

Vegas and we met them and watched them. They have a residency and it was just. the greatest night of our All the. Veronica's not a fan. So, >> Wait, what And you're outing her here on. the podcast. >> Yeah, I know. Yeah, Veronica. >> Did she meet them? Did she get a picture. with them? >> She was kind of we kind of like just. brought her along. >> Did she say out loud as you guys were. taking the picture, I am not a fan? >> No, no. She was actually really cool. about it. >> But now they're listening to this and. they're thinking, wait, what's wrong. with her? Cuz that's how I would react. >> Well, what is wrong with her? That's. true. What is wrong with her?

>> piss. >> Yes, Christina. >> Okay. >> You call her piss? >> Yeah. I call her piss. >> Okay. Classic group. >> Okay. So, uh. >> [laughter]. >> let's talk to this cuz I know New Kids. Some of the New Kids lived near near my. parents' house. in Brookline, Massachusetts for a while. And I used to see groups of young women. waiting outside hoping to get like a a. glimpse of Joey. And they'd have signs. and stuff for Joey. And um and then uh I may have mentioned.

this once before. It doesn't matter. Uh. one time one of the ladies drifted over. to my parents' house. I happened to be. there at that time visiting them. This. is after I'd been doing the late night. show for a couple of years. And they. were outside my house. Just one person. And I went outside and she said, "Yeah, things are pretty slow over at the New. Kids' house. So, I thought I'd wander over here.". >> [laughter]. >> You're like a consolation prize. >> a consolation house to hang outside.

>> Yeah. >> then I said, "Well, if you want, I could. uh you know, I could take you and your. friends out to dinner." And she said, "We're good.". >> [laughter]. >> No, I'm kidding. I didn't say that. But. anyway, it was it was They were they. were a big deal. I don't know their songs. What are some. of their big hits? >> step by step is their big one. >> one go? We got it tough. >> Step by step. Yeah. Hangin' tough. Hangin' tough. And the right stuff. There's Cover Girl. There's Time to go. >> Time to go do it. It's time to go do it. >> That's Time to Go Do It is not They were.

actually wholesome cuz they were really, you know, young. >> Right. Right. Right. You're My Kind of. Girl. Is that Is that them? >> You would be terrible in a in a any kind. of boy band. You would be really bad at. it. >> is. >> [laughter]. >> What? Stop trying. Just stop trying. But. because we talked about it on the. podcast, their team, this guy Marcelo on. their team was like, "Come to Vegas. and we'll hook you up." And he did. >> So, uh describe what the situation is. cuz I don't know what the equivalent. would be for me, you know? But um.

>> Well, to give you an idea, my my friend. Christina wrote a a letter to them when. she was eight. Pissed. Wrote a letter to. them when she was eight. >> Uh-huh. >> And she didn't send it out cuz she was. too nervous. So, she brought it with her. and gave it to Jordan. And it was like. really sweet. She's like, "I am. Christina. I'm 8 years old. I love you. guys, especially Jordan." She spelled. his name wrong. And it was really sweet. But like they were our first crushes. All They You know, we loved them. And. then they were on stage. >> What year was this? Yeah. You lost your. minds. Um and and and and and.

>> Yes. And our and our 40-something year. old selves, too. >> Yes. And were you listening to uh New. Kids on the Block music all the way to. Vegas and all the way back? >> Yes. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. And Veronica was like, "Can we put. on Tool?" And we're like, "Shut up, you. bitch!". >> Tool? >> [laughter]. >> No, she went to see Tool like days. before. >> Okay. >> Yeah, well. >> That's a nosebleed. >> Yeah. >> Oh my god! From Tool to New Kids on the. Block? You know, most people would. survive that. >> rejoinder. >> [laughter]. >> "Shut up, bitch.". That's why Sona's when she argues in.

front of the Supreme Court, it doesn't. go well. >> [laughter]. >> "I would like to shut up, bitch.". >> I'm saying that to Clarence Thomas. >> Yeah. Justice Yeah. Justice Kagan, [laughter] "Shut up, bitch.". >> She should shut up. >> He could use a shut up, >> No, it was it was one of the best nights. of our lives. It really was. >> So, that was it. A photograph and some. chitchat. >> Some chitchat. Yeah, they I mean, they. all knew that I was affiliated with you. They're all fans of yours. Like, "Bo-. Boston." You know, I mean, I don't. >> Donnie. >> Yeah, you've got that accent down, all. right. >> [laughter]. >> Boston.

>> Yep. That's how the Hulk talks when he. visits Boston. >> [laughter]. >> You know, Donnie Wahlberg was in Band of. Brothers. He played Sergeant Carwood. Lipton and he's like the emotional. center of that thing. >> Yeah. Good actor. >> I know. He was really good at it. >> Um good plug. >> Uh. >> [laughter]. >> I don't know why you're getting the word. out on a New Kids guy. >> trying to. >> on Band of Brothers. >> Yeah. >> Let me Let me Let me see. How can I. phrase it? >> to connect them to me. >> Well, not only that, but I was I was. also trying to have a moment with you. But I should have known better than. that. >> no, no. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I saw a.

chance to I saw a chance to put you down. and I took it without even thinking. about what a good guy you are. >> Yeah, let me let me try it again. >> You're trying to be kind and. >> Hey, yeah. I was trying to be kind. You. know Donny Wahlberg, right? >> Sure. you. >> Hey! Hey, [laughter] buddy. >> That's all right. Hey, >> You're my ride or die now. >> [laughter]. >> Uh. well, that's a nice experience you had. >> It's it's interesting uh to uh. you know, cuz I was doing something. recently where they were showing me like. incredible Beatles stuff. Um I I can't.

say too much about it right now, but I. was getting to see some things that most. people don't get to see. uh and it's it's going to be for this. project that's upcoming. And I was trying to explain David. Hopping was there. And he could see how. exciting it was for me. And I was trying to explain to him what. this meant to me and I said, "I guess. for you it would be like if you got a. chance to hold Tate McRae's thong.". >> Oh my god. >> And um and. >> [laughter]. >> he got so mad at me. Everyone in the. room laughed really hard. I think it's. the way I said it. I said, "Imagine if.

you get to hold Tate McRae's phone.". >> I'm impressed that you pulled out Tate. McRae. >> Tate McRae? >> There you go. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Uh it's a she. It's I think she's she's. one of the new ladies that. >> She was one of the like from Dance Moms, I think. She was one of the young. dancers and then she grew up and she's. an incredible dancer and she's a great. performer. Yeah. And she she you know, she's got a body for days. >> Uh. >> She's tight. >> For weeks. >> No, it's not the same. >> booked it for weeks. >> No, but weeks isn't it's not you're.

messing it up. It's days. >> It's the body for millennium. >> No, my god. And I Why is your your voice. sounds weird? >> for an eons. >> Stop doing it. Just stop. But you know. what else I remember? I remember that. time you um. Buddy Holly's amp. And you were really. excited about that. >> and I were in Nashville. We went to. Gruene's and they said, "Hey Conan, we. know you're a huge Buddy Holly fanatic.". They showed me one of the last amps that. Buddy Holly owned. They took off the. back and you could see once you take the. plate off the back, you could see that.

Buddy had written his name in the back. Then they showed me Tate McRae's thong. >> God, this just reminds me of that time I. got to [laughter] get my hands on a. skein of Harris Tweed yarn. >> [laughter]. >> Oh, I love that you're playing into the. role I've cast you as unfairly. >> [laughter]. >> All right, let's do this. We have a very. important show today. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. My guest today is a Hollywood. legend who has starred in such iconic. movies as The Graduate, Rain Man, and.

Tootsie, just to name a small. percentage. >> Yeah. >> It's mind-boggling how many iconic films. this man has helmed. He now has a new. memoir titled Look at Me. I am honored. He's here today. Dustin Hoffman, welcome. >> [music]. >> Dustin Hoffman, it is a is an honor to. have you here. I know you said. beforehand you I know you don't like. that kind of compliment, but it just is. It's an absolute thrill for all of us to.

be in a room with you. And I am elated because I read your. autobiography Look at Me this weekend. and I loved it. It's fantastic. >> Thank you for reading it. Are you a. quick reader? >> I am a quick read I'm a fairly No, I. want to say I'm not that quick, but I go. back and reread things a lot because. there are certain stories here in this. book Not certain stories, there's maybe. 75 stories in this book that are just.

absolutely fantastic and there is so. much to talk about. I want to say I'm. going to tell you one thing, which is I. had an encounter with you that really. makes me laugh. You and I were at a bat mitzvah. together. It was Adam Sandler's daughter. was having a bat mitzvah. You were. sitting on the table It was a big table. and you were opposite me and I'm sorry, but it's a big deal when you're sitting. at a table with Dustin Hoffman. I.

grew up adoring all of your your work. and I'm like, "Oh my god, it's Dustin. Hoffman. I'm sitting next to David. Spade's mother.". And David Spade's mother is so thrilled. that you were sitting across the table. and she says to me, "That's Dustin. Hoffman, Conan. That's Dustin Hoffman.". I said, "Yes, Mrs. Spade, that's Dustin. Hoffman." She said, "I'm going to go. over and I'm going to tell him how much. I love Tootsie. It's my second favorite. movie ever.". >> [laughter]. >> And I said, "Okay, great." And she said, "My first favorite is Amadeus.".

>> [laughter]. >> And I can't wait to go over there and. tell Dustin Hoffman, "My first favorite. movie is Amadeus and my second favorite. movie is Tootsie." And I said, "Mrs. Spade, just go up to him and say, 'I. love Tootsie. It's one of my favorite. films.'" And she went, "That's not the. truth. The truth is Amadeus is one." And. I kept telling her how to say it and. then she gets up and she walked over to. you and I can't The beauty is I couldn't. hear anything. I could just see her. talking and I could see.

>> [laughter]. >> getting the news, "My favorite movie is. the one you're not in. My second. favorite." [laughter]. And it was a joy for me. You were. absolutely delightful to her, but it was. just hilarious. >> How old was she then? >> I think she was 107. >> [laughter]. >> I think I went with her. >> Yeah, yeah, you did. >> And I think that's her getting even. >> Yeah, it was. >> [laughter]. >> She said you two were an item. >> One date. >> Yeah. [clears throat]. You were a big item in 1955, she said.

>> Yeah, that's when I graduated high. school, actually. >> That was the year. >> And we have things in common, by the. way, cuz I looked you up. >> Uh-oh. What did you find out? >> We're both from LA. >> No, I'm not from LA. I moved to LA. I'm. from Boston originally, but I moved to. LA. >> Well, Sona and I are from LA. You must. have been thinking of us. >> You're probably looking us up. >> No, no, it was No, I think it was. >> Dustin, I'm going to say this. I don't. think we have anything in common. >> Are you not 6'5"? >> [laughter].

>> Uh, yes. >> So, didn't you get teased as much about. being the tallest and I got teased for. being the shortest? >> Yes. >> See? >> Yes. >> And it was painful. >> It was painful. >> Yes. >> You're going to think I'm kidding, but. I'm not. I always look for points of. commonality. What do I have What can I. relate to this How can I relate to this. person. who's accomplished so much? And there. are real things that we have in common. You start this book.

by proving one of my theories, which is. you were cast It's your big break. You're. >> Can I just hold one second? Yeah. I. won't do this because. those who have a thing will it'll hurt. >> [laughter]. >> Um Oh my god. >> No, I'm sorry. It's It's It's. I'll tell you why after you finish your. story. >> It's going to be a 40-minute story. >> [laughter]. >> You should probably hydrate before we. get into this story. >> being my age, which is 89, is that you. lose the sensitivity. at the tip of your nose. So, it's.

dripping and you don't know it. >> Aw. >> That's why. many times I carry this and I just do. this, especially if I'm on the air, cuz. if it's dripping and you don't know it, people think it's because you're old. It's not. It's because you don't know. you're dripping. >> Right. >> [laughter]. >> Okay, go ahead. >> I have that, but it's not my nose. >> [laughter]. >> Oh. >> Killer, right? >> No. >> No, my anal glands. What did you think I was talking about. my dick?

>> Oh god. >> Okay, let's clean this up. This is on. you guys, and that's not an edit that's. staying in. >> Why is anal associated with being uh. What is it the. >> Like super tight baby. >> Super tight tight baby. Fussy. >> Why? >> Isn't it from anal retentiveness? >> Yes. >> And I think I think it's probably a. probably a Freudian uh. stage. I think anal retentive meant. you're you're holding it in. You're. You're tight. >> What's the opposite of anal? Oral?

>> [laughter]. >> Does that mean you don't hold it in? >> Oral Oral expansiveness is when you are. just chill and. >> I'm sorry. I am looking through my notes. and I don't see this area anywhere. >> [laughter]. >> I'm looking through Dustin Hoffman. questions. I don't have anal and oral in. here. >> That's cuz it's in his book. >> [laughter]. >> Um. you were getting get your big break, you're cast in a Broadway show, you are. burned in a kitchen accident. This is. how you start the book, and you try.

everything you can to hide the fact that. you've been injured because this is your. big break. You're going to be on. Broadway. They finally find out because you're in. terrible pain. You're you're really. uh uh hampered. You're not able to do. your thing. They let you go. You think, "Oh my god, it's over for. me.". And then you later realize because you. didn't do that play, you did The Journey. of the Fifth Horse. That's the play that gets you noticed.

Mike Nichols sees you. That's what gets. you The Graduate. The thing that. happened that you thought was the end of. your career. was. the propellant, the thing that puts you. where you're supposed to be. I have. found that to be true many times. Have. you And it's amazing. Yes. >> Propellant. >> Yeah, propellant. Yes. >> [laughter]. >> I thought you were accusing me of. something. >> Don't point it. >> Don't point it. But isn't that an. amazing It's an amazing thing. >> Can I ask you a question? >> Yeah. >> Are you a speed reader? >> Uh no, I'm not. I read at a medium pace.

>> Because you got about 60% of what you. said correct, which is not bad. [laughter]. You You You kind of just scanned each. page. >> [laughter]. >> I'm I'm just It's It's a question. I. don't want to hurt your feelings cuz I. know you're 6'5". >> [laughter]. >> We have no more time. Okay. This is the shortest podcast. What. did I get wrong there? I believe that I. was correct there, but uh. let's just say the gist of what I said. is correct. Is that fair? >> Can you look UP GIST? >> [laughter].

>> WHAT WOULD YOU GUESS? GERMAN? IS THAT. German or would it be. I love that you can look up words now, and you can get it immediate. What would. you guess gist is? British? Gist, yes. Yes. >> It does sound German. It sure does. >> YOU GOT THE GIST. >> JUST SPIRIT? >> YOU. >> GOT THE GEIST. >> Is it What? What am I doing? >> Why are you saying it like that? >> know. I think I'm auditioning for Dustin. Hoffman. >> [laughter]. >> I desperately want to be in a movie as a.

German guy who says geist all the time. >> I can guarantee it. >> Uh comes from the Anglo-French legal. phrase "say action gist" meaning this. action lies. >> Geist. >> That's geist. >> So that's the gist of it. >> That's the gist of it. >> Yes. >> But do you agree that. >> so much. >> this book with the story of you. encountering this terrible obstacle. but it all ends up leading to you having. this. iconic breakthrough in your career. >> The first thing I'd like to say is there.

is a woman who uh. is a co-writer of mine and if she wasn't. there for me, this would never have. happened. I [clears throat] have written. maybe. others here. Can I say how many people. are in this room? >> Yeah. >> 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 counting both of us. >> Yeah. >> Uh. if you've ever tried to write a memoir, it's you get about a page or two. >> Yeah. >> And then so I have like 20 30 notebooks. cuz I kept trying over the years and I.

always thought it was the notebook. If I. got a different notebook, I would do it. >> Yeah. >> [laughter]. >> But you know. >> It wasn't the notebook, was it? >> It wasn't the notebook. So she is ex-. [clears throat] was extraordinary and I. and it was written with her. >> Yes. >> And she was absolutely at that time the. most important person in my life, Ariel. Levy. And what made her brilliant Have. you ever. thought of having a memoir? >> I I yeah, I do think about it cuz I have. some cookie stories, yeah.

>> You got to get Ariel Levy if you can for. two reasons. One is the brain. You remember certain things. And she would ask me questions and your. brain kind of has stock answers to those. questions cuz you've been asked before. So I would give her the answers. Then. she would ask me questions about my. answers. And that was suddenly, you know what. short-term memory is? Well, there's also. long-term memory which comes in when. you're old and suddenly I remember it's.

Miss Sutcliffe who was my third grade. teacher. >> Is that true? >> No. It really It's funny you. Often people think they don't remember. And you are in this enviable position. which is you have made. an absurd number of iconic films. And. you've had You've met everyone and. you've. you've participated You've been such an. important person in the culture over.

many, many years and then suddenly. you're supposed to remember all of it. >> Yes. >> But what happens is you start talking. and someone says something that's. incorrect and you go, "Well, no, no, no. That was Miss Sutcliffe, third grade. She She She She drove a Saab. It was. green." And suddenly all these things. are coming out that you didn't realize. you could access. >> Do you remember the first teacher that. knew that you should do be a comedian? >> Uh you know, that's interesting. Uh it. took a long time. >> [laughter]. >> There were many who said, "Don't do. that." Um I actually remember that I had.

a camp counselor. I went away to a camp. I didn't have any friends there. I. wasn't that happy. I would have been at. that time maybe 11. And I was very lonely and then on some. long hike I just started. uh babbling this crazy story about a. giant bird that lived in the woods and. adding all these details and this. counselor started laughing so hard he. was crying. And he kept making me go. more and more and more and then when we. got back to the camp he started walking. around telling everyone this kid.

the weird kid with the red hair with the. bowl haircut and the That kid is really. funny. And. >> I think it was pre-puberty. >> [laughter]. >> Did you Do you remember if you had hair. under your arm yet? >> [laughter]. >> No. And I hit puberty during Obama's. first term. Okay. Right? I remember. Puberty Puberty [laughter] hit we're. good. Um yeah, but I we all remember that do.

it's funny because. you did. you talk about your father. uh in this book and I've always had a. saying in the back of my head show me a. successful creative person and I'll show. you someone who had a complicated. relationship with their father. >> Right. >> Your father. wanted to be in show business. ended up working in props but he did not. have success and he had a hard time.

being generous initially about your. success. >> Yes. >> And he had this line when you got The. Graduate at the age of 30 and overnight. became a cultural icon in the book you. say your father said, "Do you know how. lucky you are?". >> That's exactly the words. >> Yeah, and I I. >> he was right. >> He was right because. >> I'm Benjamin Braddock 6 ft 2 uh debating. squad and I'm the short Jew and Mike.

Nichols didn't even change the name from. Braddock to to some at least some you. know non-Irish Catholic name. >> [laughter]. >> Do you realize how many people don't. know because your performance is so. iconic they don't realize that the book. initially. um Benjamin Braddock is. you know, blonde blue-eyed he should be. played by a by a Robert Redford. >> That's who he wanted. >> Robert Redford. >> Yes. >> And when he casts you many people think.

what is he doing? What is Mike Nichols. doing? Including you. You were very. insecure during the making of that. movie. >> It's the worst experience of my life. working. In fact, when it was over I. said uh I'm going back to the theater. which I had been doing for years and. years. I'm not uh. I'm I'm I'm. you you I'm ethnic. >> Yeah. [clears throat]. >> I'm not. in a town that's had a facelift. You. know, I want to be back with my people.

And they did make a big mistake. You. know, because Nichols, just before he. died, and I and I'm still sorry he died. I just thought of something else. Who. was it that George Burns, on his 100th. 101st birthday, he said, "If I knew I. was going to live this long, I would. have taken better care of myself.". >> [laughter]. >> Not a bad Not a bad line. But Nichols, uh, he really abused himself, and he was. sorry that he did, cuz he admits it in.

his own autobiography. And this is. interesting, I think, is that he didn't know he had. been looking for 2 years for this. character Benjamin. No, Redford turned. it down, I think. And he asked a lot of. other people. And then he realized it. when he was writing his own memoir. And he only had four He knew he was, uh, terminal. He knew he had an incurable. illness. He confessed things, and this. was shocking, which I never knew.

He was a cocaine addict, and I realized. that's the reason he was so nice to me, and you know, cuz when he was high, it. was wonderful. The next day, when he's. on a downer, it was he was he was. abusive. He was. And And he admitted it. He's He said in the book he said he he. worshipped Bob Surtees, who was this. legendary, uh, cinematographer. And he overheard, uh,

Bob Surtees, uh, say something. And, uh, cuz they had to. do it over again or something. And he. heard He heard Bob Surtees say to his. crew, "That's okay, it'll be over soon.". And I think it had to do with with the. drugs. >> Poor guy. >> You say in this book that during the. most memorable scenes in The Graduate, which are, you know, all enshrined in the American. Film Institute, in those great scenes, you at times thought, "I don't know what.

the hell I'm doing." And that was a. disaster. That's what you're thinking as. you're making it. >> Yes. >> Which is very hard to believe, but I. believe you. I believe that that's true. That's how you felt. >> I can ask you how many times when you. started telling jokes did it not get a. laugh? >> There's no record of me ever not getting. a laugh. [laughter] That's what we've. looked into it. >> Got it. >> Over Over 7,000 hours and it's. incredible. >> What's that? You have it right. >> There's no record of a laugh. >> Oh. >> Yes. >> I got it backwards.

>> Um [laughter]. No, and it's interesting because I. routinely would leave the set after a. show and feel terrible inside. That. didn't go well. I didn't connect. That. was awful. And people would say, "That. was really good." And I would think they. were lying and I'd be upset. Um so. >> And maybe they were. >> [laughter]. >> I'M SORRY, YOU'RE A TERRIBLE PERSON.

>> [laughter]. >> I'M realizing that now and I'm I regret. that you're here, but you're here and. we're going to get through this. Your. name represents everything you've built, okay? Everything. Like I feel that way. about my name. >> Yeah. >> It stands for uh all of the work good. and not so good. >> [laughter]. >> in my life. But guess what? Your. children's names represent their whole. futures. >> Yeah. >> Your children haven't even started. building their futures, but their. identities are already valuable. Your. child's clean credit history can make. them target for identity thieves. Never. thought of it that way, but it's true. Identity thieves can open loans and.

credit cards using your child's social. security number, racking up debt and. ruining their credit. And you may not. notice until they try and get their. first credit card. So, it could be a. long time. >> Yeah. >> Well, guess what? With LifeLock, you can. add family members to your plan giving. you the power to block identity threats. targeting your children now. So, honey, your kids are pretty young still. Five, but within a couple of years you know, they're going to be buying heavy. machinery online. >> What? >> They're going to be become tractor. fanatics. They're going to be buying. tractors online. So, if you have. expenses or money stolen due to identity.

theft, you're backed by the. million-dollar protection package with. up to $3 million coverage in some plans. So, join now, save up to 30% off your. first year. Go to lifelock.com/conan. That's lifelock.com/conan. to save 30%. Terms apply. Who do you. shop for first on the holidays, Sona? Was it Do you shop for the kids or do. you shop for Tack? >> My kids. >> Okay. You got to get them their stuff. >> And then your your husband is last. [laughter]. Well, guess what? It's that time of. year. You feel that You smell that that. cinnamon cider in the air. Do you smell.

that? And you see pumpkins around, people buying turkeys. Little early to. buy a turkey. Doesn't matter. >> Holidays. I would say it's just around the corner, but that's a cliché. It's. uh very nearby in the cupboard. >> [laughter]. >> Well, guess what? Amazon delivers joy. with low prices on the gifts you want. even this early in the season. So, get. ahead of the season. Shop early gifts, top picks, holiday decor, and advent. calendars [clears throat]. at low prices. Get a head start on. holiday gifting with Amazon's low.

prices. Shop now at amazon.com/holiday. >> I have to interrupt. Family tall? >> Yeah, I think my my parents were tall. I'm taller than my parents. Um and. uh. I have a brother Justin who's very tall. And so, yeah, it was There was genetics. there. Definitely. >> Same here. I am the tallest one in my. family to this day, including uh people. that married other people who were not. in the family. I'm literally the tallest.

person. Uh. I don't I used to find that an. interesting thing to say, and I don't as. I'm saying it. >> [laughter]. [laughter]. >> I'M GOING TO STRIKE THAT. >> NO, NO, YOU'RE NOT GOING TO strike that. That's really funny. [laughter]. And also, um. I could see that. Must be nice when. you're You're a towering giant when you. hang around these relatives of yours. That must be a Yeah, it's a good feeling.

for you. >> redundant? >> Yes, it is. It's a Yeah, I'm sorry. >> giant dildo in town. >> [laughter]. >> I don't want to be here. I just don't. want to be here. >> I do. I'm loving this. >> I'm enjoying [laughter] this. >> Um you. live for I've always wanted to ask you. about this because it's insane to. contemplate. But you. you grew up in LA, you moved to New. York, you want to be an actor, you. you're doing a lot of absurd uh jobs. Uh you're working at Is it Macy's where.

you're selling toys? You sold toys at. Macy's. >> Adult games, which was different in. those days than it is now. It or adult. adult toys. They were toys for adults. In fact, what's that thing called? >> The the uh like foosball or or hockey. that. >> Yes, that yeah, hockey. >> Yeah, the little where you move the. little guys. >> Yes, and I had it on my side and then. someone would come just shopping or. whatever and I and they would take the.

other and I would use it to try to, you. know, beat them and I started to get. good at it and because I'm an actor, this won't be a long answer. Uh. I I looked up and I realized that there. were a lot of hockey players that were. French. And a lot of them got hurt playing. hockey and I tried to be a retired hurt. French hockey player. [laughter]. Literally. And in the next in the next booth. >> [laughter]. >> No, I did and I I mentioned.

I had a bad French I'm never was good at. accents but I I won't even try. But Gene. Hackman was right there at adult GAMES. ALSO. >> [laughter]. >> YES, YOU KNOW WHAT I LOVE ABOUT IT? SO. THIS is the thing I was I was getting. to. First of all, when I was reading the. book and it said for a while I sold. adult toys at and I thought, "What?" And. I just pictured you uh with you know, uh. >> Dildo salesman etc. >> [laughter]. >> I wanted you to say it.

>> Yes. >> I thought you were a dildo salesman. >> Can we look up dildo? >> And then I was crushed. [laughter]. >> Yeah. COME WOULD YOU LIKE A DILDO? >> Um what do you think it's Is it French. or German? [laughter] Dildo. >> It comes from the Latin. dildos. >> [laughter]. >> Um. >> They had them back in the day. >> They had dildos back in the day? >> Oh, they they go back thousands of. years. The early ones were made of. stone, not fun. Um. >> [laughter]. >> What's that? So. Excuse me, Sona, please. I'm trying to.

conduct an interview with a legend. >> First appeared in English print in the. late 1500s. >> Yeah. 1500s, dildo. >> English word 1500s. >> Yeah, makes sense, doesn't it? >> So [clears throat] you You're You're. working Your job at Macy's is just to. sell the toys. All they want you to do. is say, "You might like this. It's a. hockey game. Here, I can show you how it. works. Isn't that fun?". >> With the French accent. >> But you decide This is you. You decide I. need to become a French hockey player.

who's been badly injured and has been. and is now down on his luck and and. selling toys at Macy's. And you use it. as an actor acting exercise. The second. craziest thing to me is you go home to. your roommates. And they are Gene. Hackman and Robert Duvall. >> [laughter]. >> The three of you live It's like a I'm. picturing a bunk bed with three levels. And you guys are snoring in unison like. the Three Stooges. That's what I'm. picturing. That's crazy that you all.

live together. >> Did Did We didn't live together quite. like that, but did. >> [laughter]. >> Did In my mind you did. >> Okay, you can. Did you live ever I'm. guessing because you said that that you. yourself at some point in your life. lived in a bunk bed. >> I. >> you want cuz this tells me a lot about. your personality. >> Uh-huh. >> If you had your choice, did you want to. be on the upper or the lower? >> Upper. Yeah, are you a top or are you a. bottom? >> [laughter]. >> I'm a top. >> Okay. >> I'm a top. I always wanted to be on the. top. I thought that would be cool. I. never got to sleep in a bunk bed until.

my freshman year of college when that's. what they gave us is bunks. >> So you chose the top? >> I chose the top. I wanted to be on top. I've always wanted to be on top. >> You're just saying it a little bit. >> thrill would be to be on top. >> Okay. It's a little a little. >> I mean, you guys aren't understanding. me. My erotic fantasy. >> Yeah, [laughter] no, we got it. >> Um okay. >> We got it. No, we got it. >> Um. >> Well, you certainly don't want to be on. the bottom if the top is 350 lb. >> [laughter]. >> Again, I'm looking through my notes. I'm.

not seeing this anywhere. >> [laughter]. >> I'm seeing all these things to talk to. Dustin Hoffman about father, uh jobs, roommates, fame. Um. I'm going to go with fame. >> Okay. >> You had an interesting experience, which. very few people have. You became famous. overnight at the age of 30. You make The. Graduate, you're an unknown. The movie. doesn't just become a hit, it's a. cultural phenomenon. Many people think. that it ushers in the death of the. studio system, a complete new kind of. film. It is endured as a classic, and.

then you. don't know how to handle this. >> One second. Sorry. >> You get two more of those, and then. that's it. >> [laughter]. >> I'm not doing that to try to get. attention. >> Sure. >> Because it's. >> By the way, your book is called Look at. Me. >> [laughter]. >> So, I think you'll do anything to get. attention. >> We all. >> think you need to blow your nose that. often. I know what you're doing. Um [laughter]. >> But but I am dripping.

I am dripping. Go ahead. >> You were not happy about suddenly being. famous. >> Well, but the truth is is that I was. miscast. >> only person in this room that thinks it. was a mistake for you to play Benjamin. Braddock in The Graduate. >> What do you think that sir? What do I. can say sir? >> Yes, you can. >> [snorts]. >> Sir, what are the odds of someone being. in basically their first film. with the best director. of all time at that moment? I mean, who.

would you compare him to today? Maybe. what, Spielberg or something? That was Nichols. I mean, he was a god. He was the god. And to be cast in that, and not only is. it. a hit, but as you said, it's it becomes. this phenomena. What's the odds? A. million to one? Two million? I mean, it. has to be. >> people are coming up to you. You can't. go anywhere. People come up to you. They. want your autograph. At least it's. before selfies, so no selfies. But.

>> That's right. >> You had a a little bit of an allergic. reaction probably to just suddenly this. is your reality that everybody knows who. you are. >> Do you Do you always want me to answer. the first thing that comes to my mind? >> Sure. >> Like an analysis you're supposed to do. >> Yeah. >> I I. >> I'm your therapist now. >> Okay. Allergic. I have had a life My first. reaction I've had lifelong acne. >> Mhm. >> Literally. I mean, I take Accutane.

three times a week or else I'd be look. like a 15-year-old. I mean, there's an. upside to that, testosterone, but we. don't want to, you know, belabor that. >> [laughter]. >> And I'm 89 and I still [clears throat]. have, you know, lifelong acne. So, I said I will never make another movie. again after that. And I went back to the. theater in New York. because I it was. a horrible experience. I was fighting. acne. I was short. He thought he made a.

mistake. Uh as I said, you know, he told. all his friends, you know, I miscast the. lead, which he did. Uh [snorts] and. >> is telling everyone I made a mistake. >> Yes. Yes. And uh. And he's not. he's not really dealing with it because. of his. >> addictions. >> Yeah. >> So, you thought I I did that film, it's. a big hit. I don't want to do that. necessarily anymore. >> At all. >> And then you proceed to make There's.

almost too many to mention. >> just naming our own generations'. favorites and every one of our. generations has a number to pick from. There's so many. >> But it's interesting. It's it's it's. uh you know, Marathon Man, All the. President's Men, uh. >> Tootsie. >> Yeah, Kramer versus Tootsie, Kramer. versus Kramer, uh Hook. I mean, some of. it. >> Midnight Cowboy. >> Midnight Cowboy, Sona comes in ranting. about Hook. She's a completely different. generation. >> Yeah, so is Eduardo. We both We both are.

big Hook fans. >> And so, you've you've managed to make. these movies for every single. generation. It's very. interesting to me. that you after The Graduate, you're. thinking, "Well, that's it for movies. for me." And then you proceed to have. this. streak that I don't think is rivaled by. anybody. >> I'm not [clears throat] sure. Maybe. you're right. I can't tell. But. I do know that I was supposed to be, as. I say in the book, I was supposed to be. the failure. >> Yeah. >> in the family.

>> Yes. >> My brother was a triple-A student, was. an athlete. He was asked to be on a uh. major. baseball team. When he graduated, he. chose college anyways cuz he thought. he'd have a longer career. And he was. And I was supposed to be the failure. I. was the designated failure. I was very. comfortable with that. And I even failed. at that. >> [laughter]. >> It was your failure to be a failure. >> Yes. >> That's your true failure.

>> Yes. >> Wait, you can do that? >> Yeah. >> Oh, no. >> [laughter]. >> And that was painful, actually. >> You say in the book, I think it's a. quote, you said um I cannot stress this. enough, nobody expected anything from. me. You were a very bad student. >> The worst. >> Uh and. the only reason that you got into acting. was because someone told you it's like. PE class. You can't fail. >> So, nobody fails acting. I mean, nobody. fails. gym. I mean, [clears throat] you get a.

C, right? >> Okay. I. >> You failed gym? >> I failed gym. [laughter] Yeah. >> Aw. >> Yeah. >> No, you couldn't have. >> I I made that up. I just thought it'd be. fun. >> 6'5", my god. >> Yeah, guess [laughter] what? >> No coordination. >> That's the problem. I had the height but. not the coordination. And again, uh no testosterone in my body. until Obama's first term. >> What about your sport? What was it? >> I was a runner for a while. >> At 6'5"? >> Yeah, it was a mistake. They made me a. distance runner and I looked like. sort of a red-haired gazelle.

But a sickly one, like a tubercular. gazelle running across. >> Why not basketball? >> Because you need to care where the ball. is. >> [laughter]. >> I never cared where the ball is. So, they would toss a ball to me and I'd. say, "I could grab it or I could think. about this funny bit that's in my head.". >> You know who said, "Give me. [clears throat] the ball, give me the. ball"? >> I didn't want the ball. I would say, "No. one give me the ball.". >> [laughter]. >> I didn't want the ball. I still don't. want the ball. >> Right. >> Waste of time to have that ball. >> You have to have a sport today, though,

right? >> I think you everyone has to have a. sport. >> Really? You have yours today? >> I'm late. You have to have a sport. There's this. It's just such an insane picture, but. it's a famous picture. You finish The. Graduate, The Graduate comes out, massive success. You were paid $3,000. for your role as Benjamin Braddock in. The Graduate, $3,000. Now, I know that. went a lot further back in the late. '60s, but still $3,000. You didn't have. any money. and so you went back to the unemployment.

office and someone at Life magazine took. a photo of you. >> Yes. >> The most famous face in America at the. time, waiting in the unemployment line. to get a check. >> Yes. >> $50. >> $50 check. >> $55, I think, was the most you could. get. >> Yeah. And so. >> Which you could live on. I mean, you. could live on. >> Back then. >> Yeah, 200 a month was a lot. >> Now, that's one smoothie at Erewhon. >> Yes. >> And not the good one. You have so many. great stories about your co-stars,

people that you worked with over the. years. And your process for making up these. characters. After The Graduate, you have this chance. to play Ratso Rizzo. In Midnight Cowboy. John Schlesinger, the director, was going to make the. movie Midnight Cowboy. Um he needed to. get financing. >> Yes. >> So he said I. he couldn't get it. So he said they and. he probably told if you cast Dustin. Hoffman who's now a big star, you can.

make this movie. He didn't want you. He. thought because he saw The Graduate that. that's who you were. >> Yes. >> So you have to convince John Schlesinger. and again, just like you at Macy's, you. decide. I'm going to become Ratso Rizzo and. convince this director. >> No, don't Oh, I shouldn't interrupt. I'm. sorry. >> No, no, go ahead. You you may interrupt. me. >> [laughter]. >> Okay. Well, since I am, you're taking a. drink out of a cup with a deer on it. >> [laughter]. >> Yeah. >> Is that an accident?

>> No, I chose this mug. I. I love this guy. I love this mug. And um. >> Have you ever You could tell that with. that very Have you ever shot an animal? >> I never have shot an animal. >> Never. >> I never. >> Never took a bow and arrow to a deer. >> No. I I threw a hammer at a rabbit once. >> [laughter]. >> That's weird. That's. That's weirder. >> [laughter]. >> An arm's length. Wasn't a long throw. >> And you know what? The rabbit was doing. nothing to bother [laughter] me.

And if I can go further, it was a. petting zoo. Jesus. >> [laughter]. >> I'm sorry, Dustin. >> Yeah, it's not It's some time for that. It's okay. We all pay for our crimes. Where the hell was I? >> Did it die instantly or is it. >> [laughter]. >> somewhere is there a crippled rabbit? >> No, he just. No, I I I I got him. It just hurt his. leg and then there was lawsuits. And the rabbit showed up in court. >> That's why they always stood up on twos. I think there's some guy with a hammer. in their paw. >> [laughter].

>> I said, we're not going to get We're not. going to get into why I used to go to. petting zoos and throw many times. hammers at small animals. That's my. thing. That's how I get off. >> Now. >> Um yes. >> If I may. >> Yes. >> It wasn't just John Schlesinger. I was I. It's funny because you're still you even. if you become a star. You're still you. behind that. >> Mhm. >> And I was very angry that the public did. not think I was anything but Ratso. Rizzo. >> Not Benjamin Braddock. >> Oh, that's Yeah, yeah, right.

>> that people thought. You're thinking You're thinking I'm an. I'm an I'm an actor. I'm trained. I I I. do a lot of work in method. Uh and. >> another subject, but go ahead. >> Yeah, but I mean, you And suddenly, you. have a little bit of a score to settle. because you want to show people No, I. I'm not Benjamin Braddock. I became. Benjamin Braddock for The Graduate. Now, I I'm going to become Ratso Rizzo. >> That's why I took the part. >> Yeah.

>> Was to get revenge against the world. I. wanted to prove because that's who you. are behind. everything. You're still trying to prove. that you're an actor. >> Yeah. >> And I hated humanity. And that's why I took And in fact, Mike. Nichols calls me up. It's one of the. great moments in my life. And he says, "What are you doing?" And he's talking. in that sing-song, you know, "What are. you doing?" And I said, "What?" He says, "You're playing this.

What do you say this. >> tubercular, limping. >> detestable character, and it's not even. the lead. It's a supporting part. Why? And he said, "Why are you trying to. destroy? I made you a star.". >> Ah. Yeah. >> And it was I I was I loved the fact that. he had said that because that is the. reason I didn't work for a year. I. didn't want to be a star. I only wanted. to do good work. I never I didn't. because I was the failure of the family.

My brother was the star. >> Yeah. >> And there are people There is a. basketball player. Who was that. legendary. the guy who's Jalen Brunson? >> Brunson, yeah. >> He said a great thing. He says, "If. you're ahead by 30, 40 points, why do. you still care?" That's what you You're. still trying as hard as you can. He. says, "I wanted The reason I do the next. shot," he says, "cuz I want to see what. I did wrong. I want to correct what I. did wrong." That's a great answer. So,

it's got nothing to do with anything, but the moment I want to I don't I want. to correct the mistake I made so I don't. make that mistake again. >> Yeah. >> But that has to be true true with you, too. >> it's a it's a it's a. uh hunger that doesn't go away. And I I. remembered once. >> It's a good way to put it. >> I. uh uh. I think we used to have young people. come in, sit in the audience at the late. night show, and ask me questions. They were students. and um interns, and they would come in.

and they got to just ask me questions. And I remembered one woman. who might have been, I don't know, 19, 20 years old, said, "When do you stop worrying and being. anxious? When does that stop?" And I. said, "I got bad news for you.". You know, and at the time I was in my. late 40s, and I said, "It doesn't. It never does.". >> Correct. >> You need to be hungry. You need to be. scared, not terrified, but you need to. be scared. >> Yes. >> And we're all pushing for that. We're.

all digging into that. And I think your. decision to take. that role of or to try and get. the role of Ratso Rizzo is you saying, "I have now given myself a whole new. challenge.". Most people would say, "I just I just. did the graduate home run. Aren't I. great?" You said, "No, no. Now I have. really have something to approve." And. uh it became fuel for you.

>> I wanted revenge. >> Yeah. >> I wanted revenge against everybody. >> Yeah. >> I loved that he said it's a supporting. role. >> Yeah. >> It's but I don't as I said, that's I. think. not getting a laugh, you want revenge. cuz you want to get the laugh. >> The um So, you end up meeting Slessinger. in Times Square in a dive coffee shop. You haven't showered. you're dressed. like a bum, and you you're dirty, and.

you show up to prove this is who I I can. be this guy now. >> Yes, and I don't know if it still exists. cuz everything changes, but anybody from. New York here, do you know what an. Automat was? >> Oh, I do. >> those vending machines for food. >> a quarter in and you get a sandwich. >> Yeah, and like some of them were on 42nd. Street when 42nd Street was 42nd Street. It was [clears throat] It was literally. open 24 hours, and I said, "Meet me at. Horn & Hardart" cuz I had been there at.

3:00 in the morning when I was literally. trying to research the character. That's. one of the places I followed one guy who. had I I You know, actors are crazy just. like, you know, comedians. >> [laughter]. >> And, you know, you you're you're looking. for the right limp, you know, for forever. You're following different. people. >> out what's the right limp for Ratso. Rizzo, and you're following people. >> Yes, and the guy who wrote the book, James Leo Herlihy, literally.

said it in the book. He says, "You're. like the fifth wheel.". He says, "It's like it's You're like. this.". >> It's wobbly. Yeah. >> Yes, and that's the limp. That's what I. was trying to get that limp. And I saw. something that was extraordinary, which. everybody who knows New York knows. For. some reason, New Yorkers are waiting for. the signal to change, and for some. bizarre reason, why there can be like 20. of us there want to be the first to. cross. >> Yeah. Yes.

>> Why is it still true? Still true. They. want to be the For what? I I'm Look. here, I got here before you guys. [laughter]. And I thought that that was Ratso, that. he would not only get across but with. his limp, he wanted to be the first one. >> Yeah. >> And I. you start to learn. from little things like that, you put. together who this guy is going to be. >> Yeah. >> And then I even thought the. concentration camps, and he was a. survivor. And you didn't ask yourself.

why and how did he become a survivor? >> Yeah. >> Because we know that there were some. people who came became a survivor by. giving up other people. >> Yeah. >> But the point and I thought that's. Ratso. >> Right. >> He doesn't give a. >> Right. >> He really doesn't. He just wants to be. there. So it becomes more three-dimensional. >> So you're. >> He does he's not a good guy. >> Yeah. >> And I said [clears throat] and it's very. easy to be.

heroic or something when you think about. that, but you don't know what you would. do if you were faced with instant death. >> No. >> But they were going to let you live if. you gave up. >> someone else. >> Yeah. >> Um yeah. The um. >> Very easy to be heroic in the. >> Well, people love to armchair. quarterback later on and say, "I. wouldn't do that." None of us knows. >> That's right. >> who we are when there's a gun pointing. at us. >> That's right. >> And we hope not to find out. >> That's right. >> Um so.

>> Did you ever have a gun pointed at you? I'm sorry. What? Did you ever have a gun. >> you're thinking of cuz you're thinking. of killing me at some point. >> No, I'm just thinking I know what you'd. be like with a gun to your head. >> [laughter]. >> Please, please take Dustin Hoffman, don't take me. >> Did you ever have a gun pointed at you? >> I've never had a gun pointed at me. Have. you had a gun pointed at you? When? And. props don't count. >> I was having this is in my youth youth. >> Yeah. >> I was having an affair. >> Mhm. >> with a married woman. >> Oh. >> And she thought that once her husband.

went to sleep. that he stayed asleep. >> Oh. >> And I was invited to come over. after he came. he went to sleep. And there we are having a FESTIVAL OF. SORTS. >> [laughter]. >> AND HE WALKED IN WITH A GUN. >> OH. >> And he pointed at me. And he said, I. remember what he says, "Get out. Get. out." And when you have a gun pointed at.

it, first of all, that hole is much. bigger than the actual hole, and you. realize. how. any second, any second he's going to. pull that trigger, cuz his finger is on. the trigger. And you think any second he's going to. You realize it's it, it's it, it's it. You're going to I'm going to die, I'm. going to die the next second, the next. second, the next second. And you do. anything. You will do anything, you know, to avoid. >> Yeah. >> uh getting killed. >> jumped out the window? You ran away?

Continued the festival? >> [laughter]. >> No. >> Sir, could you come back in 5 minutes? I need Make it 7 minutes. >> [laughter]. >> Um. there's a story in here of you making. Marathon Man. with Sir Laurence Olivier. And. I never realized how sick Laurence. Olivier was during the filming of. Marathon Man. He's essentially dying. He's on a. >> And he knows it. >> He knows it. And he's on a lot of.

medication, pain medication. There's cancer throughout his body. He had trouble getting insurance for the. film. They finally get it him uh insured. And. you're shooting one of these iconic. scenes, I'm going to use that word 700. times in this interview. Um you're. shooting a scene with Sir Laurence. Olivier, and you're doing the wide. coverage, cameras are far away. And he's kind of acting out to the. rafters, like he's. projecting, you know, the diamonds and. the diamonds, it's very loud.

>> And you think that's okay, the camera's. got got It's a master. >> Yeah, it's a master. >> And it keeps getting closer and closer. >> closer and closer. >> reaching for the balcony. >> And the director, again, John. Schlesinger, says to you. >> I go up to him. He says, "I know, I. know." He says, "I know he's over the. top." That's what they say. >> Yeah. >> But I'm not going to tell the greatest. actor in the world. >> [laughter]. >> If you want to, you [clears throat] can. >> Yes. Isn't that great? I'm not going to. tell Sir Laurence Olivier he's he's. overacting a bit. >> Right.

>> want to, you can. So, you go up to him. >> Yes. >> And you try and do it in this very. polite way, right? You make a suggestion. about, you know, we could try one where. we. you know, maybe we use a little more of. the the way we're rehearsing where we're. just doing lines. We could try one like. that. >> just doing lines. >> knew exactly what you were talking. about. >> Yes, because with all the medication, I. mean, here's a guy who had three. parts in repertory committed to memory, you know, what Hamlet, Macbeth, King.

Lear. Literally in repertory, knew all. three of those word by word. And here's. a guy who can't put. four words together because of the. medication. >> Yeah. >> We prompt him when we're in wide shots. and we get closer and closer and closer. And he we're at a break and I go up to. him and I. again, as I said in the book, I people. call him Larry and I. could not call him Larry. >> Yeah. >> And I didn't want to say. you know, sir, so I called him Lordage,

you. >> Lordage. >> I love that. Yeah. >> And we were I said, you want to just run. the lines a little bit and you know, while [clears throat] we're you know, just for the to try to keep them in his. head. >> Mhm. >> We went behind it was outdoors, so we. went behind a tree or something. So we had some privacy and we're doing. it and then. uh I'm kind of coaching him. >> Yeah. >> And he's [clears throat] just standing. there. And I said, let's just let's just run. the lines, you know, just for the. I you can even look at, you know, the.

the. the the you know, the script for the day. or whatever. And he gave me this long. look. And he knew. >> Cuz you were encouraging him, let's try. it some takes. Now that the cameras are. close, let's try some takes. where we kind of take it down just as a. fun exercise. >> We're talking right now that we talk. >> We're talking right now. Let's try it. like that and he knows what you're. doing. >> A very long look. >> Yeah. And he said, so you think I'm I'm. playing a little too big. >> Yeah, am I over the top?

>> Yeah, are you a little over the top? And. what's amazing is he looks at you and he. says, thank you. >> After a long beat of the eyeball to. eyeball. >> [snorts]. >> and it makes me emotional. >> Yeah. What was the second thing? >> thank you.". >> Yeah. >> And we were very close after that. He uh. It was awful what he had. He knew he was. dying. And he and the Bob Evans, who was. the producer. some he had a genius uh when there. wasn't coke coming out of his nose, you.

know. Cuz he And by the way, he was. that was a time when you went to a party. and there were lines of coke, you know, on the on the table. Everybody started, you know, I did. And it was it's By the. way, it's the greatest drug in the. world. There's not There's not. >> [laughter]. >> And I thank God. >> that word out, by the way. >> No qualifiers. >> It's just the greatest drug. >> Thank God I'm allergic because I. couldn't breathe after that. I was. allergic to it or I wouldn't be here. now. But because you're right there, you're right there. I mean, coke was.

in Coca-Cola, coke was in it. >> Yeah, in the original Coca-Cola, there. was cocaine in there. >> Yes. And then. >> And then some idiot took it out. >> Yes. [laughter]. Yes. Yes. >> The original. uh Twinkie was pure methadone. >> [laughter]. >> Cocaine used to have coke in it. Can you. believe that? >> Coca-Cola in it. >> Oh, okay. >> Yeah. Um You're an idiot. And so am I. >> [laughter]. >> And that's why we get along. Okay, this. merits two parts because there's just. way too much to talk about and that is. your fault.

Um. I am thrilled that we're doing this. Uh. stay tuned uh for later this week when. we have part two of my incredible chat. with Dustin Hoffman. You know, winning. an award, that's a big achievement, right? >> Yeah, I love awards. >> Every now and then in life, maybe. something nice like that comes your way. Winning them consistently is almost. impossible. It just doesn't happen. >> Mhm. >> You know? Well, guess what? Winning five. times in six years. You know what that sounds like to me? Sustained excellence.

>> Nice. >> Hyundai has done just that, earning the. title of America's best SUV brand for. 2026 from US News and World Report. You. are a very happy Hyundai driver. >> a Hyundai Palisade and I love my car. >> I've been tooling around in a Ioniq 5 N, which I love. >> Mhm. >> Beautiful car. Well, listen, whether you. need an SUV for everyday life, your next. big adventure, or extra room for family. and friends, Hyundai has an option for. you. The Tucson Hybrid is loaded with. technology and built for everyday life. The Santa Fe Hybrid is fully capable and. ready for adventure. The Palisade,

that's yours, right? >> Hello. >> to rename that the Sona. The Palisade Hybrid, yeah, delivers. premium capability and class-leading. interior space with available, I have. this memorized, HTRAC all-wheel drive, up to an EPA-estimated 619 mi of range. on vehicles like the Palisade Hybrid and. Hyundai's industry-leading warranty. It's easy to see why Hyundai continues. to deliver the quality, innovation, technology, and value drivers expect. from an award-winning brand. View US. News Best Cars at cars.usnews.com.

and call 562-314-4603. for complete details. Hey, let's dig. into the voicemails and hear from one of. our listeners. Okay, let's do it just cuz you said. that. >> [laughter]. >> I don't understand. >> I don't I'm trying to think, is there. another reason we do it? >> we you said we were going to do it and. then you said, "Yeah, let's do it cuz. you said we were going to do it.". >> But anyone just listening to the podcast. just hears you say, "Now, let's do. that." And so, yes, we will do that. I. was trying to think of the natural. response. >> That was supernatural. >> natural at all. And I was trying to.

>> that this is what we will do and now. we're going to do it. >> And then you restated it. >> You're the pharaoh saying you must leave. Egypt. And now we will leave Egypt. >> of power? >> You do. >> You're fired. >> Yeah, it sounds like you were. >> Enjoy those locusts. >> Were you trying to insult him? >> No. >> I don't believe you cuz I think you. were. Uh, the way you said it. >> making a comment. He was kind of mocking. the way I did it, you know. >> Well, you did it in a very, uh, you. know, you will now fasten your seatbelts. for we are landing and I think, uh, that. was a crime in its own way.

>> I see. Yeah, okay. >> Conan. >> I'm spiraling fast. All right, let's. let's just go ahead and play the. voicemail for Christ's sake. >> Hi, my name is R.C. Graham. Uh, I'm from. Akron, Ohio. And I'm looking for some information. that Conan, you may not have yourself, more than likely, but some members of. your long-term staff might. So, my. intent, uh as inspired by a video from. the University of Illinois in the last. couple of years, they made a couch you. could drive around. And my intent is to.

make a desk to drive around, ala the. recurring bit on Late Night. Now, I. looked at a site, uh more specifically, it was a article about the auction for. the last Late Night desk, and I got the. dimensions at about uh 48 in by 24 in by. 29 in. Hmm. But if I can get some more. details, that'd be great. Like, what is. that plywood? What are you using to. finish that? Because, while I'm not a. woodworker, I'd want to make it kind of. nice, at least like a lot of your desks. uh going through. They had a kind of a. nice finish, but they're kind of, as I.

understand it, Late Night desks are kind. of crummy on the inside. I don't know if. you can relate. Anyway, uh. my intent is to kind of get an idea for. the dimensions, get an idea for the. weight, figure out the the overall. material. And as an engineering student, my my goal to use it as kind of a. vehicle. uh to practice the mechanical aspects. while I'm currently learning the uh the. electricity. Uh feel free to uh answer as you please,

and I hope that you're all doing okay. over there. >> Wow. >> Have fun and stay safe. Bye-bye. >> I put a lot of thought into my all my. desks that I had over the years uh on. the talk shows. Uh ash uh I would always. insist on ash, um and then I would use. birch. Uh. I would sometimes uh use a studding, which was made of mostly a durable old. English oak. >> Wait, you I'm sorry, [clears throat] you. you were using these to make your own. desk? >> I was giving the specifications. >> Okay. >> close. It wasn't 48 in, it was 48 and.

1/2 in. Oh. >> Oh, okay. >> Um I always make sure that each desk, after the woods were applied and resined. uh with a high-density polymer that they. were baked in a kiln. >> Hmm. >> for 7 hours. >> Hmm. >> Um the desks were valued by Lloyd's of. London as having a worth of about. $600,000 each. >> Okay. >> Um, they are prized possessions. Um. Let's face it. I don't know anything. about these desks. >> Were were Were Was it really up for.

auction? >> know anything about these desks. >> It does seem that it was up for auction. I found the picture here. >> Did anybody buy it? >> Um, not sure. >> That's kind of crazy that your late. night desk was up for auction. >> Yeah, it was up for auction and then. when no one bought it, they threw it in. a dumpster. >> [laughter]. >> And the final bid was $26,000. >> Wow. >> Yeah. >> Um, first of all, I don't know who would. who would auction that off? Like who. took it? Who sold it? >> NBC. >> I'm looking at this auction site, you. know, when you think of auction sites, you think of like Christie's, Sotheby's,

Julien. This is Big Mo R. L. Spear Co. Incorporated. >> [laughter]. >> Um, I'm just curious I'm I'm wondering. if who's got the sticky fingers over. there at NBC. Um, it doesn't matter. >> Also funny, this is lot 78. It does not. say your name. It just says host's desk. from early era of popular late night. talk show, approximately 48 by 24 by 29. >> You said popular. >> Hey. >> Starting bid $1. >> And then the question is complicated. because yes, there are some of my desks.

out there, I guess. Uh, there were several. There was um a. thing that you could do at the NBC store. for years and years cuz Andy and I would. do a bit where we would get behind my. desk and using green screen, we would. have all these adventures driving. around. And that was a lot of fun. Then NBC the NBC store turned that into. an experience where you could sit and. ride the desk with me. And so I've met. many people over the years who said, "I. was 15. I visited New York with my.

school. I waited in a line and I drove. the desk with you and I still have the. tape." Which is fun. >> That's nice. >> That's cool. >> How much do you think this desk would go. for? >> This desk as Did you make this desk? >> I did not make it. >> Wait, first of all, Eduardo, again, props to you for designing a studio. You. are a master. But uh I don't know who made the desk. >> Eric Bores. >> Eric Bores made it. >> Eric made it. Yes, beautiful. >> Yeah, Eric's awesome. >> Yeah. >> I can't wait for someone else to have. this desk in a few years and auction it. off for $800,000. >> Is that how much it is? >> No, it's not going to get that kind of.

money. >> Who knows? >> Yeah. >> Uh I am curious. RC asked if the inside. of the desk, like obviously the facade. looks fancy. Does the inside of the late. night desk look crappy? >> made for you, I'm assuming, right? >> custom made. >> Cuz yeah. >> You know what I will say about That's a. good question that Adam asked. Uh the. outside of the desk. had sort of a a nice finish cuz it was. on television. It's HD cameras, lighting, it has to look good. Not HD. when we started, by the way, for years, but then we went to HD. Um.

as all shows did. But, what's really. fascinating is if you saw the reverse. angle of the desk, and like where my. legs went and everything, it was. I mean. it was just about as down and dirty as. it gets. It was It was just like a. wooden slot. for me to. put like a handkerchief in or something. and a pen. Um and I think there was like a. there might have been a a like a sort of. crude trash can back there that was. nailed to the side, but no finish or.

anything. It really was uh looked like. >> piece. >> It was a set piece, and my side of it. looked like the thing had been made in 5. minutes by a a bunch of drunken rabbits. >> Hm. >> That's cool. >> I'm looking at this, and I'm seeing a. walnut veneer on top. >> Okay. >> And then with a little walnut on the. outside with a birch ply inset on those. uh sort of things. >> what it is, Tracy? Cuz that would be my. guess. You're quite good. It's It's. actually very good looking, and I'm. wondering why we didn't bid on it. That's That's a nice looking.

>> looking desk, and I'm surprised you. don't want it. >> Can I just. >> Or you didn't Not that you don't want. it. >> know about it. >> Yeah, I know. >> I didn't know about it. I I. I didn't know that it was uh I mean, it. was not my property. I guess it was NBC. property, and my guess is someone came. along and said, "I'll take that.". >> But, look at the difference in this this. kind of, you know, stark lighting photo and then when you. see it under the stage lights it looks. so gorgeous. Look at. >> It was a really beautiful desk. >> Yeah. >> You know what? What's trying to get it? So it's been sold to someone Blaise, how.

long has it been sold for? >> Uh I I think you said $25,000. >> 26. >> 26. I'll I'm going to I'm going to do a. little research here and we'll see if we. can get it for you. >> Yeah, I mean I'm not going to put up any. money. >> Okay. >> But you you just want it? >> I think we're going to find out where it. is and steal it. >> Just a heist. >> Oh, just a heist. >> Stolen it. >> Heist. >> I didn't know. stuff. >> I didn't know. >> a heist. That's our specialty. >> You didn't just grab a bunch of stuff? >> No, I didn't. >> You should have. >> my Eisenhower mug that was on the has. been on every talk show desk I ever did.

anything with it's and. that that I kept. >> You still have that and that's still. >> I still have that. >> Never broke or anything? >> Um it got a little cracked and we made a. fake one to sub in for it. >> Oh, wow. >> Uh but I have the original. >> And that other mug Greg made you. >> Greg Daniels made me a mug that was. always on my desk. >> Yeah. >> Um I still have that. >> That's a good friend. >> Yeah, it says I hope you fail on it. >> [laughter]. >> And and the Eisenhower says that too, doesn't it? >> Yes.

>> [laughter]. >> And that was from Joseph Stalin to. Eisenhower. >> Yeah. Um wow, okay. Well, I I don't. think we helped this guy with any of his. questions. Good luck to you. Go online, look at that desk and do the best you. can and I do I will say Matt Gourley is. very talented. all around very good at woodworking. So. your guess is about what it's made of. are probably correct. >> I guess though I can't tell totally from. that because it's it's clearly been. like built and then stained but for kind. of TV. It's not it's not necessarily.

like a. >> Also remember to match my overall vibe. it probably looked okay on camera but. it's rotten to the core. >> [laughter]. >> All right, good luck to you sir.