Conan's Fan Thinks His Podcast Merch Is Cursed - "Conan O'Brien Needs A Fan"

Conan, please meet Fiki. I'm sorry, is it. it's Fiki, is that right? Yeah. It's like Viki with an F. So Fiki. Yeah, you were saying it right. That is so cool. I've never heard that name before. Thank you. I love an interesting name. That's a very cool name. It means "My beloved" in Amharic. Oh wow. You know what Conan means in Gaelic? What? Wide face. (all laugh). So both of those are absolutely right. Basically. Yeah. Yours is right. And mine is right. Well, Fiki, and you are a chess champion, right?

Yes. I've been playing since I was eight. Did you love the Queen's Gambit. or were you kind of annoyed. that she learned how to play chess by staring at a ceiling? That was, that was a bit weird. when people were like, "Oh, do you do that too?". I was like, "No". But I mean, it's a good film. All the games are real. Cause I've like paused it. and I've been that annoying person who's like, "Let me look at this.". \That's cool. You would pause Queen's Gambit and check out the pieces.

and make sure that like, "Oh, I see what they're doing. Yes. This is an actual move.". A lot of films use like, oh this person's playing chess means they're smart. But half of the time it's like. the moves aren't correct at all. Yes. That's what would happen if I made a TV show. and Victor was playing chess. You'd look down and you'd notice some of those. aren't even chess pieces. There's a thimble. Some monopoly there. Yeah. There's a little horsey. from like a plastic horsey set. There's a GI Joe.

I Yeah. That's what you would find out. I also think one of the things I noticed in Queen's Gambit. is that she hits this part of her life, where she has a different outfit change. that's stunning for every single chess move. Like she'll move her chest piece. and then she'll say, "I'll be right back. Now, it's time for Prada.". I found that to be a little strange. Where are you right now? Well, my background's the United Nations. (laughing). I see that. Yeah. I love that. I love that your United Nations background, it looks like. You know what it looks like? It looks like you're a super villain who's appearing.

before the United Nations to tell them they have 24 hours. Yes. You have 24 hours to meet my demands. or that sky will rain giant chess pieces. Just to be clear, that's not what you're doing, right? No. Okay. That's good. Where in the world are you right now? I'm in New York city. Oh cool. All right. You're in New York city. You must've been playing chess early because chess players. they practically start in utero. Mhm. I kind of have to. That's a lot of the Russians. So you were playing against Russian champions when.

you were still unborn. Yes. That's really impressive. So you'd just kick the stomach wall a couple. of times for, and that means, that means. Oh my god. (laughing). Mom plays this move. Yeah, mom play this move. Now mom play that move. That is wow. That is impressive. So when. So how early did you know, really this as far back. as you can remember, you knew chess. Chess is your superpower. Well I could play with the boys and get hurt. which I didn't want to do. I could sit with the kids who didn't do their homework.

which is kind of awkward to do. So my teacher was teaching chess and I just sat. And I remember I didn't get it at all. but he was just really nice to me. And he kept teaching me. So every choice time, I would go. over to the chess table with like three other boys. I remember thinking very clearly I can't play. with the boys cause I'll get hurt. I remember that very clearly. They're aggressive, even in third grade. Boys are the worst. Trust me. I realized then that (laughs).

I didn't, you know. This is even going back to like kick ball. which is supposed to be the easiest sport. I remember trying to kick the kickball. and missing and everyone laughing at me. and deciding I need to do something else. and I need to be elsewhere right now. But I, I applaud that. I applaud that you, you found your passion so early. So what are you doing now? What are you working on? Trying to pass college. (laughing). Pass college? Everybody passes college.

Well. Yeah. You see the people that pass college every day. Yeah. There's no passing college. You're going to pass college. You are a brilliant person. You know, you can, you can lie in your cot. at night and look at the ceiling and imagined chest moves. I know you can. I wish I could do that with tests and answers. (laughing). Where do you go to school? Bates College in Lewiston, Maine. It's cold up there. Mhm. I'm at home right now. I'm going to go back after I get my second vaccine. Oh you got the vaccine? Yes I did. New York I was eligible.

That's cool. Podcasters are eligible. I know that. Well I'm here to tell you as a podcaster, no we're not. (laughing). That's just what I want to do, is show up in a long line in LA and go, Excuse me, I'm a podcaster! That's not going to happen. You should suddenly see a tall redheaded. Piñata getting beaten, but I'm glad you're. I'm glad you're getting vaccinated. I'm really happy about that. You're a very cool person. You're very smart. You are a delight and you you're just, you know.

you're there in front of the United nations. They have to meet your demands. I like the whole thing. The moment I saw her background and I was like, Oh, she's cool. I know, I thought that was. like an international chess match or something. Many people think the UN does engage. in international chess. Okay. I actually went to the UN. for chess conference type of thing. Judit Polgar. She was encouraging other women to. other girls to play chess. because most girls stop around high school, college. Right, right.

They can get almost phobic or steered away from math. because they think it's well, that's not really. what I should be doing or spending my energy on. Which is you know, terrible and should be that. I think that's changing. I think it's changing quickly. I think people like you are changing it. So. Oh. Thank you. Yeah. Well that's what I do. I dispense compliments to people that deserve them. What? My name is Conan O'Brien. Not you Sona. Sona goes what? Well, really nice talking to you. I love your name. I'm gonna remember that name.

and I'm going to use it to steal your identity. In a murder? (laughing). No, no its. You said that hopefully? Yeah. (laughing) No just cash missing from your account. You'll see. Oh dang. This is, this is pretty much a scam. Oh. I get people to give me their information and then. they later on find out. "Hey, how come I never heard myself. on Conan's podcast and how come $7,000 is missing. from her account?". Well, nice talking to you. Thank you, Ficky. I have one last thing. cause it's my roommate.

Okay. So it's around the time of Halloween. And so we were watching The Ring and I got your mug. Have you seen your Conan O'Brien needs a friend mug? I think I saw one once. I can show you it's. What. How does it relate to the ring? The movie The Ring? We watched it and then it was. around the same time I got the mug. And then, so my roommate has led lights. so it just started completely flashing. And then my bed, not my bed. My desk started to shake. So my roommate thinks this mug is cursed.

(laughing). Wait a minute. She's saying. The Conan O'Brien needs a friend mug. that you purchased online is cursed. She seriously is banning the mug from. Mhm. I dunno how to Sage it. or should I put googly eyes on it? (laughing). No, do not put googly eyes on my mugs. That's demeaning. And will make me look like some sort of absurd character. I can't believe that your roommate is so narrow minded.

that she would think. that anything with my face on it invokes evil. No, it's also just a bit like creepy, just cause. it's these like two piercing blue eyes just staring at you. Yes. When they said, what kind of mug do you want? I said, I want one that captures the real me. and all the women on staff agreed that. I'm a creepy staring guy, and that immediately became the mug.

So um. I'm sorry. I'm sorry that if you think the mug is cursed. I don't think I, I don't think I can lift that curse. I think if it's cursed, it's cursed. Sona, why are you laughing? They're watching the ring and then they thought. that your mug was cursed. It's just her roommate. Won't allow it back into the house. There's so many things about this. I love so much that you just invoke this evil just.

from a cartoon portrait of yourself. Or is it just the roommate doesn't want it in her view. So she's saying, its haunted we got to get it out. Yeah. Cause we're, we're, we're finding out. that a lot of people are coming up with excuses. not to want that mug around. And so it could be. that she doesn't believe the mug is cursed. She just doesn't like seeing my face. And I've had a lifetime of people saying. "I'd rather your face wasn't here right now.". Oh no. Cmon. Oh its true. True story. True story. Um.

My room is also on top of the laundromat, So it might explain where my bed shaking, my desk is shaking. Oh wow. I'm still going to say its the cup. I'm sorry. Its, they thought it was the mug. before it was the laundromat down stairs. You live above a laundromat and you're blaming. my mug for the room shaking. Rather a cursed mug. Well, there is a rodeo downstairs. I forgot to mention that. We live above a theater. That's been showing Hereditary around the clock.

24 hours a day, seven days a week for two years. But my, my roommate says your mug is cursed. Well, my beef is with your roommate. I say it's not cursed. But, but if it is cursed. I hereby lift that curse.