Conan Refuses To Move Seats When His Studio Camera Dies | Conan O'Brien Needs A Friend

Hey there and welcome to Conan O'Brien. needs a friend. Uh everything is. different today. Everything is different. today and not in a good way. Let me. explain. Uh Matt Gorly. uh called in. He says he's sick. I. suspect him of just goofing around or. whatever. He didn't seem sick. I saw him. yesterday. I saw him this morning. Do. you guys hang out without me? I live. with him. Yeah, we live together. I saw. him on a Zoom today. He looked rough.

Oh, he did. He maybe he might really. laying down. Yeah. Well, it doesn't mean. he's sick. It just means he's relaxing. Anyway, Matt Gorly not here. So, what. happens is they said, "Okay, Matt. Gorley's not here. Is it okay if David. Hopping sits in?" And I'm like, "Sure.". Um, but then I said, "Okay, no, David, you you know that you're you took you. filled in for Sona. Uh, you now do the. day-to-day assistant stuff. and Sona, I. don't know what you do, but somehow you. get paid more than you ever were paid. before, but anyway, who can understand.

how this company works? I don't know. who's in charge. Um, so you're sitting. in, but then we're about to record and a. bunch of people I don't even know come. out of the house, the house, the studio, and they say, "Uh, the camera's down. Conan's camera's down." People are. scrambling around because this can also. be seen on the YouTube. Yeah, it can be. seen on the various on the YouTube. The. YouTube well on the various YouTubes. Yes, YouTube. Feel free to jump in at. any time there. Sure. Talk a lot.

YouTube and our social channels. Yes. No. No. And don't feel like I just. shamed you. You're allowed to jump in. whenever you want. Just make sure it's. valuable. So, there's video. My camera's. down. My camera's usually right across. from me that way. But now my camera's. way over to this side. And I have to. torque my whole body to see my camera. and put those blue peepers into the. everlasting light. Now, here's the other. thing that's different. Sona usually.

sits over on this side next to me. She's. always to my right. Andy Richtor, all. those years that I was doing uh the talk. show, almost 30 years, was to my right. Sona is now diagonally across from me. Yeah. And so I don't like that. I don't. like anything that's happening today. And I look directly across from me and. you're here, David. Yeah. So everything. uh and I know people say, "What's the.

diff? What's the big diff?" Larry Bird. Larry Bird when he played for the. Celtics and he was on that parket floor. in the old garden. He knew where the. dead spots were in the wood. He knew he. knew that court inside and out. And this. is my court. I am Larry Bird. This is my. parkquet floor. The year is 1984 and I'm. playing at an incredible elite level. And I've got a very wispy mustache on my. upper lip and I come from French lick.

and my shorts are way too short like. everyone else in the NBA. I mean, you're. just about to see anything jump out at. any second. That's me. And then suddenly. they said to Larry Bird in 1984, something's going on with the garden. We. got a problem. You're not going to play. there. And also your teammates that you. rely on aren't going to be there. Uh. some of them are missing. Well, who's. missing? Well, Robert Parish isn't going. to be Robert Parish isn't going to be.

there. Kevin McCale's not Kevin McCale's. not going to be there. Who's going to. fill in? Bert Zeerman. and Josh Gallabana. Oh, they're sitting. in. What's that? You're saying Larry. Bird didn't know how to play on the. road? It's not like the Celtics played. all their games at home. Yeah, Eduardo. Eduardo. Yeah. If you ever speak to me. again, it'll be the last time you speak. to me. No, I'm just saying that he's. preparing himself for a home game. Okay. Yes, I know that they would play on the. road, but I'm sure Larry Bird. familiarized himself with those courts.

as well. What I'm saying is they took. away some of his his personnel, okay, his teammates, his chums, and the people. that he's used to playing with. Then. they said, "Guess what? We're not even. going to play on a basketball court. today. You're going to be playing at at. the in the bin of balls.". What? The bin of balls. They just. changed at Chuck-E-Cheese. They just. changed your camera. No, they want me to. dribble a ball in the bin of balls at.

Chuck-E-Cheese. Okay. And so I'm trying. to dribble the ball and it's just. bashing into all these other Huh. Nobody. calls it. They call it a ball pit. Pit. bin of balls. What is that? I've never. heard the term. It's a ball pit. I've. never been there. I've only seen it in. commercial. And so I never heard it. identified. I've only seen kids emerge. from it looking more frightened than. happy like they survived ash rain at. Pompei. But I that's all I've seen. But. no announcer ever said, "And you'll. enjoy the ball pit." But I never heard.

it name. So I just said that is a bin. that's been filled with balls. So I had. to make up my own name and it stuck with. me. All I'm saying, if I can be allowed. to finish my sentiment, is that I'm 1984. Larry Bird. I've been taken away from. Boston Garden on the Parket floor. I've. been stripped of Robert Parish and Kevin. McCale and I'm trying to bounce a. basketball in a bin of balls at Senor. Chuck E. Cheese.

That's what I'm saying. I don't I don't. mean to keep bursting in here and I'm. sorry about this, but also can I say I'm. realizing Sona nor I got to look I'm. looking into my camera right now. Normally Sona sits between you and I. Yes. And you uh many times during the. interview will look over at Sona and I. hide behind Sona in her hair. Now I've. got like the eye of Sauron directly. There's nothing. How do you deal with. this? Well, first of all, you should be. happy cuz I would have fired you alone. I know. I can see you now and I'm.

irritated. I hate I want to crawl in. You should. And also, let's let's get. something straight. A lot can hide. behind Sona's hair. You know what? I. mean, there could be a Volkswagen bus. back there. Come on. I'm just saying. And you should be proud of it. You have. thick luxurant hair that's all over the. place. It's everywhere. And then you put these products in it. Yes. A lot of various waxes and eastern. oils.

Why are they eastern? I don't know. You. know what? I'm the one who moved. Everything is different for me. You. don't even look at the camera when we're. recording most of the time. Nothing's. changed for you. They also asked you to. move and you said no. Yes. It's true. They did ask me to move and I refused, which took an extra 10 minutes. They had. to bring in a whole like other ladder. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, anyway, uh I'm. sure Larry Bird wasn't always easy to. work with back in 1984. Uh all I'm saying is the analogy holds.

Okay. I'm an elite A-list athlete in the. mid80s and uh everything's been changed. up on me and yet still I think I've put. a lot of points on the board. Oh god. Oh. my god. Pretty good, huh? I don't know. It's wrap it up. Yeah. Well, guess what my guest today? Put on. the old glasses. Remember when I didn't. have to wear glasses? Falling apart. here. My guess, you know what I'm going. to get is a Laurenette.

Should we get one of those Laurettes? I. didn't even know that was the word for. it. Yeah. And it's Well, it's also. called bin of balls. Um, I want to get a. Laurenette, which is the thing you a. society lady puts up to Groucho, you know. Also, Bin of Balls just tells. me you've never been to a birthday at. Chuck-E-Cheese. No, I never have been. Okay. And maybe I'm sad about that. And. maybe all these jokes are hiding a. wound. I also used to hear the one time. a kid died in the ball pit and I think. it was suffocated. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Like they got stuck underneath them. But. it's not true. It's an urban legend. Yeah. Let's make Let's just make sure. that that's a potential legal matter. No, it never happened at Chuck-E-Cheese. and nothing bad ever happened at We. should just cut that part out. But. that's what I heard. And did you I think. you should leave it in as a cautionary. tale. Yeah. About saying things about. giant balls. But the ball pits are all. gone now, too. Oh, that's sad. Fishy. No. more bin of balls. Um, stop saying bin. of balls. Sad. Yeah. Been there, done.

that. Okay. My guest today.