Conan Confronts His Longtime Producer About His New Look | Conan O'Brien Needs A Friend
we thought we might initiate a series of. Staff reviews here at Team Coco. facilities we're gonna start with your. producer longtime producer Jeff Ross not. to be confused with the roastmaster. general Jeff Ross the comedian uh Jeff. Ross has been my producer we really. started in late night together what is. it 31 years ago Jeff maybe two 32 years. it was 93 April 93 we met April 93 so. someone do the math I think it's I think. it's feel got a calculator no it's been.
57 years I don't care enough any who you. get the point we've been together side. by side on this crazy adventure through. Show Business and what we're doing Jeff. is uh thinking that maybe we just review. people talk to them about their work. it's not going to go well no no it's. going to go well of course it's going to. go well Jeff you've been you've been. with me at the helm of this ship for a. long time we've been through we've been. through highs we've been through lows. we've been through highs.
of lows a Qui High then years and years. no it's been great it's great we've had. a great ride um but I think it's time. for a brief catchup sure lately on uh. your performance here at the. show Jeff I'm just gon to come out and. say in all the time I've known you. you've worn glasses okay this is where. you're going you've worn glasses the. whole time I've known you true very.
recently yes you had a surgical. procedure which you needed to have this. was not elective that it was a surgical. procedure that you needed to have on. your eyes and while they were doing that. surgery they were like hey we can. correct your vision at the same time. think kind of that's the way it works. yeah that's the way it works yeah so. they corrected your vision and I didn't. you didn't first of all talk to any of. us about this you went ahead and had. this surgery which you had to have which. you had to have hold on why would he. talk cuz I talked to Jeff about all the. surgeries I have that's true we talked. to each other about our our various surg.
when I was circumcised and then I went. back and had it put back on and then I. was circumcised and then had it put back. on again I tried to talk him out of it. both times had it and you were just like. put it back yeah I wanted it back and. they couldn't they couldn't well I was. holding here's the thing I don't Jeff. had it for while in his wallet the way. high school kids keep a condom in their. wallet people were like Jeff you've got. a condom in your wallet he's like no no. no it's t. forkid but thank you for keeping it. you're supposed to moisturize it but he. didn't oh.
back on there just like an old dry Pig. ear yeah. well we went back and forth two times. cuz I kept changing my mind now it's. back on and I'm not convinced it's mine. but that's a whole other. story anyway that's not why we're having. this review okay the focus should not be. on the crazy surgeries that I've. had butchering my my my member maybe. they should be but Jeff yes you had this. uh you had this thing and you come in. and suddenly you're not uh wearing. glasses is because you don't need to.
anymore because you have now 2020 Vision. but I need readers you need readers but. most of the time you're walking around. the office I just uh went on WE shot a. travel show together in a foreign land. uh we we travel the world together and. you're not wearing glasses and you're. he's Jeff you will agree a very. good-looking man you're a good looking. guy everybody you you are you're you're. a good-looking man um I didn't hear your. whole listen the whole time I've been. with Jeff people women always nudging me. like that Jeff Ross is a good-looking. guy and I'm like hey what am I chop Li. over here um but uh Jeff make it about.
you what's up what I said make it you. make it about you yeah I was born on. make it about you Mountain. um so. Jeff isn't wearing glasses now and he. comes in and you walk around you don't. have glasses on and I can't get used to. it and I'm not the only one a couple of. us Eduardo feel free to weigh in weird. it's weird I can't get used to it and. here's the thing I can't get used to it. and you'll get to talk in just a second. wait a minute I'm not even sure that's. true I might just keep talking this a.
great a lot of us are having trouble. adjusting and the thing is it's our. problem because you've had a certain. look for a long time but and then. suddenly it changed and you look great. but I'm not used to it what are we going. to do let me say two things first of all. I'm not used to it either because still. I wake up in the morning and I reach. over to the bedside table actually it's. on my left and to reach for my glasses. and they're not there and some sometimes.
at night when I brush my teeth and I. wash my face I reach for my glasses and. they're not there what I might do I'm. considering is what you did which is get. like. Progressive nothing up top and readers. at the bottom yeah yeah I have. considering that I don't mind wearing. glasses and I just decided I'll yeah did. the progressive thing so my eyes without. glasses are fine but I don't like. putting glasses on and off all the time. yeah this is a pain and so I just wear.
glasses uh so that when I can pick up a. book and read uh and I have I'm sorry I. have a question this is a staff review. yeah okay right all right okay let me. get back to the review part of could I. just do a segment of reviewing the staff. reviews cuz I have a couple notes hold. but listen but please let's talk more. about your progressive lenses well I. didn't put on that was Jeff who made the. executive producer decision you asked me. a question and I answered it to no. here's what I'm saying saying I want you.
to immediately this is a staff review I. want you to immediately start wearing. glasses I want you to wear them all the. time no those are at the end of your. nose now you look like Grandma M yeah. doesn't work okay I want you and if not. I'm going to go do what you did no no. let's not get I do I do that a lot. anyway let's not get on to progressives. again because that's a we Sona has told. us that's a bad topic I had a thought go. back to your force game no no that's a. separate episod that's from my staff way. yeah kind of Staff by the way I could.
get it again yeah so listen Jeff I had. an idea which is that you get a tattoo. of glasses oh on your eyes you get. glasses drawn on as if you fell asleep. at a at a fraternity instead of a a. penis on your cheek it's just some. really nice glasses Tom for glasses only. if we can go back to New Zealand to that. place where the guy with the crazy. tattoos on his arm and he does it okay. you like that guy you like the tattoos.
oh I I like to keep it secret where. we're going but Jeff I guess likes to. just blab it out thought it was a secret. because everybody knew you were there. true something in a stadium social all I. heard the whole time was in in the van. was bla how's social's doing how's. social's. doing staff review. sta I like the idea of no glasses um. it's a whole I just have to get used to. it but I want I like things I'm at a. stage in my life I'm no spring chicken.
where I like things to be the same and. so the other thought of that I had was. get Jeff two monal and he puts one in. each eye and you walk around with two. monocles yeah you know Colonel Clank had. one you get two I remember one of room. and then when you're in a meeting with. me and you're surprised by something. like Conan stole that much from the. budget your eyes widen and they both. fall out that would be funny one at a. time maybe yeah one and then the other. well when something's quizzical or. skeptical one falls out out yeah but you.
to keep the other anyway these are just. ideas you should think about I. appreciate that and it's weird for me. too would you like to maybe quickly. review me since you and I you're the. only person that can the only one that. has the authority how am I doing Jee. you're doing great we're still working. wow we're going we're still going you. don't have any notes I have a few notes. we can feed you a few notes you don't. have notes I've been riding this gravy. train for 31. years okay if you think I'm going to. start giving notes Jeff is crazy Jeff's. sitting on top of the Caboose of the.
gravy train uh well Jeff other than the. glasses and get that straightened. away I will uh A+ All the Way keep doing. what you're doing thank you and I. thought this was pretty painless yeah. totally painless.
