Chris Robinson Wants Conan To Bring Back The Masturbating Bear | Conan O'Brien Needs A Friend

hi my name is Chris Robinson and I feel. confused about being Conan O'Brien's. friend I don't see why you'd be confused. I think we have a natural affection we. do but I get mixed messages from you I'm. a Sagittarian I'm very sensitive and you. know what I need more attention you need. more attention for me I'm the lead. singer don't you know about the. attention levels that are like flowing. through me at all time you are going to. get so much attention from me I adore. you you know that uh I am a massive fan.

of your work uh and we can get into all. that but boy you talk about oh man I've. always wanted to meet Chris Robinson and. then from the first time I met you when. you would come on The Late Night show. you were so goddamn hilarious and then. I'm talking I ran into you recently and. let's just say we hung out for a little. bit uh there was let's just say why you. got see what I mean about these messages. let's just say let's just say there was. a hang there was a hang with the. Robinson Brothers B maybe we did and.

maybe we didn't and some tequila was. involved some highend tequila we had a. really good time and you were making me. laugh so hard and at one point you said. something to me I think you mentioned uh. uh your wife and you said I said oh your. wife and you said yes yes my third wife. and then you said I'm not afraid to love. C and I started laughing true I started. laughing so hard and you were that level. of funny the whole time I was just so. delighted uh you're a very talented.

musician frontman for one of the great. bands of all time and I also think you. are a comedian I think you a really. funny comedian the first my my. initial foray into the business we all. know his show thank you was uh I I when. I was a teenager I didn't you know I. didn't know what I want I knew I wasn't. probably going to be the manager at a. Barnes & Nobles or whatever cuz you. didn't.

you need to dedicate yourself my. dyslexic uh reality has made it very. difficult for me in the day job world. but so I had an acting class and um I. was horrible I was a horrible actor but. the guy who ran it had like a you know. like a local cable show it was like a. sketch comedy show and I would be like. oh I can do the rabbi who sells you know. barbecue or what you know what I me. exact he thought I wasn't a good actor. but he thought I was funny and he was.

like oh write some sketches so but and. then I started doing that and then the. very first thing I ever did uh was. standup comedy at this club I opened for. like what's the guy's name uh Washington. older uh George Washington not that guy. no he never did he he always pered. George Washington I mean there just I. mean he's a very big one okay you went. right to the oldest and most famous.

Washington which is cool that we could. just narrow it down so quickly was made. it big it was no but he's big he's big. he's a black comic he wears a he's older. he wears a k go backwards George Wallace. yes George Wallace you confus him with. another famous Statesman. George make America George Wallace again. they're doing it in. alab but yes George W I opened for him.

that's crazy and it was horrible I. didn't know any of this this is he was. funny I it was it was horrible I do. wonder sometimes though if I had you. know what I mean because like anything. else that you practice the dark arts. comedy is an is a whole world an entire. dimensional thing and something that's. very important to me laughing and just. things that I think are funny but I'm. like wow what if I had commit you know. what I mean cuz when music was the thing. I was like there was never any turning.

back you know what I mean you had to. completely immerse yourself into maybe. what the future could hold if if if. whatever but trust me Chris you chose. wisely because every comedian myself. included we we dabble I walk around I. play my guitar in front of the mirror. still at my Advanced age I dream about. uh you know getting to live that life. and I don't even mean in a big way I. mean if I was just touring and just.

barely getting Buy in an old van do the. same thing I feel like I'm at I'm at the. chuckle bucket in. Oklahoma I put on 50 lbs and it's like. Jake lamada talking at the end of his. career and I dream too can I dream you. can dream you can dream you guys should. switch you take on the black crows and. you take on this podcast I know but he's. been very successful but my dream but. like he said his music dream goes to. like my mine would I'm telling you I.

would Johnny Thunders in New Orleans the. last day before it's all over I would a. crime we don't know I would I would take. down the black crows instantly you would. let me borrow the black crows for one. day and it would be nope it's over and. you can never use that name again I. remember very clearly and I've talked to. you about this but uh your band uh was. very important to me at a very important. time so around. 1990 is when I'm around the time I'm.

leaving SNL I'm going to go work on The. Simpsons and I am driving around a lot. alone and I am listening to Shake Your. Money Maker until the thing just I think. I had a was back when you would slide a. CD uh into uh the the the Ford tourist. you were driving around and that's a. true story God forbid a cassette gets in. there yeah God forbid yeah I think my. problem is I was shoving a cassette into. the CD slide but it sounded great still. I listened to that and I thought this is. so great great and then Flash Forward a.

little time and I'm I'm about to leave. The Simpsons and I know that something. big is going to happen in my life I can. just sense it I'm about to take on this. late night show and the southern Harmony. and musical companion comes out and for. my money as much as I know Shak your. money maker was the Aton Atomic Bomb. Blast I think the southern Harmony and. musical companion is a perfect perfect. thank you I mean I think it's probably. our you know it's it's our best one it's. our absolutely fantastic and I listen to.

it and I listen to it and I listen to it. and I would listen to uh remedy and then. into and then into thorn in my pride and. I would drive around at night like a. serial killer without the killing part. yeah which you know kind of ruined it. but just the obsession and the focus and. the staring letting choosing and. choosing my victims but not doing. anything you have a van that's ready but. you just never use I have all these. tools but I don't use those either let. the madness overtake you but not.

completely sweep you away of course. every walk to the edge you know what I. was I was the slacker serial killer I. never quite could get my ass up and do. the actual crime are you're like the. seror killer with obsessive compulsive. disorder who. like you don't like blood I can't touch. int TRS in. Wool there must be a chat room for. that but anyway that was hug huge for me.

and then over the years on The Late. Night show uh you guys would come on and. one of my favorite memories and we I. have a still photo of it somewhere you. were touring with the great Jimmy pagee. you and your brother The Black Crows. with Jimmy pige we call him you know. Chim I'm just kidding I call him I call. him Mr pige I'm just kid you call him. sir pige sir Pig uh but you guys did. something with him which was. mind-blowing and then you came over and.

you sat down and you had said just. before the show you said hey Conan I. want you to bring out the masturbating. bear while I'm sitting there that's the. only reason I thought he would be here. today yeah that's the only reason you're. here now it's like we have a lactating. [Applause]. raccoon it's a male raccoon here. lactating we're out of oat milk but. bring that.

bring that raccoon in here the raccoon. the raccoon nipples are like hanging on. the table like leave me alone enough. what's wrong with you get some. oat milk like everybody else in Los. Angeles so uh damn it you came so I said. yes so the great thing is that of course. you and Rich you know what's going on. you've watched the show before so you. were chatting with Jimmy Paige the.

creator of lead Zeppelin When all of a. sudden we had the the bear come out and. start masturbating in front of Jimmy and. you and your brother are howling. laughing and Jimmy has this look of like. I've seen it. all I'm sorry and he didn't know what it. was but a bear came out in a diaper and. started masturbating in front of him on. national television and he was just like. oh I this happened in 72 yeah yeah in. Seattle my boy he's like I live in alist. R's.

home you know what I mean this is. nothing you think a masturbating bear. will face me and he's and you know in. his mind he's like that Bear's not. really masturbating he just simply Shing. the Bulge in his diaper very. quickly my boy let me show you how it's. done let me bring out my whips um there. was a picture I got to find it but I got. it framed I love so much and it's you.

and your brother and Jimmy between you. and the bear batting at the bul the bear. also like because of like you know I was. so excited I mean I there's very you. know the masturbating bar was like right. yes you know what I mean make America. great again bring that back.