SYSK's 2025 Shocktober Halloween Spooktacular | STUFF YOU SHOULD KNOW

[music]. Welcome to Stuff You Should Know, a. production of iHeart Radio. [music]. [music]. Hey, and welcome to the Spookfest. I'm. [music] Josh, and there's Chuck, and. we're flying solo today. Uh, I should. probably stop speaking like this because. I'll bet it's getting annoying.

>> That's right. Welcome to the one of our. most fun traditions, [music] our adfree. spooktacular where in which we read two. stories. >> Mhm. >> One of your choosing [music] and one of. mine and yours is up first by uh Edward. Frederick Benson. Is that right? >> Yeah. Better known as EF to his friends. >> Yeah. Did you see where this was uh. published? Should [music] we should we. give a shout out to that? >> It was published in one of his books. He. wrote several books, but this one comes. from 1912.

And I don't remember the name of the. book, Chuck. Thank you. >> Uh, well, I have it, sir. It was first. published in an anthology called The. Room in the Tower and Other Stories. >> That's it. >> And this is not The Room in the Tower. So, this is and Other Stories, but it's. called Caterpillars. And uh at first I. thought, by the way, this was going to. be, you know, we read stuff in the. public domain. So a lot of these stories. are sort of like, you know, the creepy. house and the and the uh you know, there's not actually a creature or.

monster. It's like it was within me all. along. >> Sure. >> That was the direction of a lot of these. stories, but this one actually has a. nice little payoff with some real creep. stuff. >> Yeah, it is a creepster for sure. Uh, and before we get started, Chuck, um, I. want to tip our hats to Ben, guest. producer Ben. >> That's right. >> Who last year just laid a smackdown with. his first version of editing one of our. Halloween spooktaculars, and I expect. he'll do it again.

>> Yeah, I agree. And, uh, we plugged it. recently, but uh, Ben is a musician, so. we might as well plug it again here. since everyone's listening here at the. top. Ben has a new uh collection of. songs out called Songs for Sleeping Dogs. and it is great. It's instrumental. It's. very viby and cool and uh you can find. it wherever you find any music. >> Yep. Way to go, Ben. >> Okay, I say we get started. Um, as per. usual, we haven't talked about this at.

all up until this very moment. >> That's right. >> Uh, I didn't even know you knew the name. of the anthology until you busted it. out. It was spectacular. >> That's how we roll. >> So, who wants to read first? You or me? >> I mean, it's your story. I say you kick. it off. >> Okay. All right. Are you ready for this? >> Yeah. Let's do it. >> Do your cheeks. >> Oh, wow. It's been a while. Let me see. if they still uh flop. >> Oh, yeah. This is going to be a good. one. I can tell.

And everyone, here we go. Settle in. Uh, put on some fake cobwebs all over your. skin. Get a mug of um bat juice. >> Yeah. >> And get ready for Caterpillars by EF. Benson. [music]. I saw a month or two ago in an Italian. paper that the Via Kascana in which I. once stayed had been pulled down and. that a manufacturer of some sort was in. [music] process of erection on its site.

There is therefore no longer any reason. for refraining [music] from writing of. those things which I myself saw or. imagined I saw in a certain room and on. a certain landing [music] of the via in. question nor from mentioning the. circumstances which followed which may. or may not according to the opinion of. the reader throw some light on or be. somehow connected with this experience. Everybody got that? >> Can I stop you real quick? You we're. going with via. >> Yeah. Okay. >> What would you say? Valle say a villa.

like a you know an Italian villa. You. say be via. >> yeah the the L's make a nice sound. >> All right. >> All right. >> I'm following your lead, pal. >> Well, then maybe uh if we can look up. who is correct and then Ben can edit in. your voice over mine. >> No, no, no. >> For for Via. Are you ready? >> I'm ready. >> The Cascana wasn't always but one a. perfectly delightful house. Yet, if it. were standing [music] now, nothing in. the world, I use the phrase in the.

literal sense, would induce me to set. foot in it again. For I believe it, to. have been haunted in a very terrible and. practical manner. Most ghosts, when all is said and done, do not do [music] much harm. They may. perhaps terrify, but the person whom. they visit usually gets over their. visitation. I feel like that's quite a. presumption, don't you? >> Yeah, totally. Like what about somebody. whose whose hair is white because. [clears throat] of their being that. scared? That's tough to get over.

>> That's happened. >> Okay, back to it. They may on the other. hand be entirely friendly and. beneficent. But the appearances in the. Via Cascana were not beneficent, and had. they made their visit in a very slightly. different manner, I do not suppose I. should have got over it any more than. Arthur Inglas did. What do you think? >> I think so far so good. We have that. scary setup of a of a creepy place which. seems to be most of our stories. But. again, this one goes in a different. direction.

>> You want me to keep going? >> Yeah. Yeah. I feel like you're doing. strong work. >> Oh, okay. Thank you. >> The house stood on an clad hill. Is. being uh holly bushes. Oh. >> Not far. Yeah. Not I looked it up. Not. far from Cestri Lavante, [music] on the. Italian Riviera, looking out over the. iridescent blues of that enchanted sea, while behind it rose the pale green. [music] chestnut woods that climb up the. hillsides till they give place to the.

pines that, black in contrast with them, crown the slopes. All around it the. garden in the luxurious of midspring. bloomed and was fragrant and the scent. of magnolia and rose born on [music] the. salt freshness of the winds from the sea. flowed like a stream through the cool. vated rooms. >> Man, this guy can write. >> This is a very nice house. >> Yeah, sounds lovely. >> He continues on the ground floor a broad. pillared loia. And I looked this up too. Beloia is a corridor, but that is um.

essentially like a place a corridor. where you'd sit with arches in the front. face. It's not just open with like a. railing. >> Okay. >> And also that means that Robert Loia's. name means Robert corridor. >> Yeah, that's the first thing I thought. of. >> So the Loia ran round three sides of the. house, the top of which formed a balcony. for certain rooms of the first floor. The main staircase, broad and of gray. [music] marble steps, led up from the. hall to the landing outside these rooms, which were three in number, namely two.

big sitting rooms and a bedroom arranged. on suite. Well, the ladder was unoccupied. The. sitting rooms were in use. From these, the main staircase was continued to the. second floor where we're situated. certain bedrooms, one of which I. occupied. While from the other side of. the first floor landing, [music] some. halfozen steps led to another suite of. rooms where at the time I am speaking. [music] of, Arthur, the artist, had his. bedroom and studio. Thus, the landing.

outside my bedroom at the top of the. house commanded both the landing of the. first floor and also the steps that led. to English's room. Jim Stanley and his. wife finally, whose guest I was, occupied rooms in another wing of the. house, were also were the [music]. servants quarters. And I feel like this. is way way too much detail about this. house. >> That's what they all do though. All. these old stories, I feel like there's. always a very detailed sort of map and. at the end of all of them, I feel like.

they almost should type, does everyone. get it? >> Yeah. Like I've read the story a bunch. of times and I still don't have any. conception, a mental map of this house. It's all just blobs of steps and like. sitting rooms, you know? >> Yeah. But having known what happens, really the only important thing you need. to know is this guy's staying in a room. upstairs and there's another room close. by that's unoccupied. >> Very nice. >> Yeah. >> You want to take over here? >> Yeah, sure. Sounds like a good switch. >> I arrived just in time for lunch on a. [music] brilliant noon of miday. The.

garden was shouting with color and. fragrance, >> burnt sienna. and not less delightful. after my broiling walk up from the. marina should have been the coming from. the reverberating heat and blaze of the. day into [music] the marble coolness of. the villa. >> Is that where you're going with? >> I'm going with villa. >> Okay. >> Uh only in parenthesis the reader has my. [music] bare word for this and nothing. more. Only the moment I set foot in this. house I felt that something was wrong. This feeling [music] I may say was quite.

vague though very strong. And I remember. that when I saw letters waiting for me. on the table in the hall, I felt certain. that the explanation was here. I was. convinced that there [music] was bad. news of some sort for me. Yet when I. opened them, I found no such explanation. for my premonition. My correspondence. [music] all to prosperity. Yet this. clear miscarriage of a presentiment did. not dissipate my [music] uneasiness. In. that cool fragrant house, there was. something wrong. >> So homeboy gets some letters and thinks. like that's what I think is my bad.

feeling. like I've got bad news awaiting. me. But it's all great news. >> But also keep in mind he's a house guest. and he plans to stay so long that he's. forwarded his mail here. I hope he. cleared that with the hosts. >> Yeah, that's a little weird, too. A lot. of presumptions going on here. >> Yeah. >> Uh here we go. [clears throat]. I'm at pains to mention this because to. the general view it may [music] explain. that though I am as a rule so excellent. to sleeper that the extinction of my. light on getting into [music] bed is. apparently contemporaneous with being. called on the following morning. I slept.

very badly. He could have said I sleep. great. >> Yeah, but I kind of like that one. >> Yeah, I agree. I slept very badly on my. first night in the Villa Cascana. It may. also explain the fact that when I did. sleep, if it was indeed in sleep that I. saw what I thought I saw, I dreamed in a. very vivid and original manner. Original, that is to say, in the sense. that something that, as far as I knew, had never been previously entered into. my consciousness, usurped it then. But. since, in addition to this evil.

premonition, [music] certain words and. events occurring during the rest of the. day might have suggested something of. what I thought happened that night, it. will be well to relate them. >> EFBon never met a parenthesis that he. didn't like. >> Oh man, you ain't kidding. Uh, after. lunch, then I went round the house with. Mrs. Stanley, and during our tour, she. referred, it is true, to the unoccupied. bedroom on the first floor, which opened. out of the room where we had lunched. Little more mapping going on. Uh, are.

you gonna do you want to read her voice? >> Sure. >> All right. >> We left that unoccupied, >> she said, because Jib and I have a. charming bedroom and dressing room, as. you saw, in the wing, and if we used it. ourselves, we should have to turn the. dining room into a dressing room and. have our meals downstairs. As it is, however, we have our little flat here. Arthur Inglas has his little flat in the. other passage. And I remember. parenthesis, aren't I extraordinary that. you once said that the higher up you.

were in a house, the better you were. pleased. So I put you at the top of the. house instead of giving you that room. Hey, and I imagine this guy at this point is. like, "Oh god, lady, [snorts] just can I. go to my room?" Right. >> Got a cross word puzzle to do. Uh you. want to take it from there? >> Oh, sure. It is true that a doubt vague as my. uneasy premonition crossed my mind at. this. I did not see why Mrs. Stanley.

should have explained all this if there. had not been more to explain. I allow, therefore, that the thought that there. was something to explain about the. unoccupied bedroom was momentarily. present to my mind. I. >> I got to say though, I really do love. that he did acknowledge what we just. acknowledged. Like she didn't have to. say all that. >> No. And if you're not if you're like, "What is this guy talking about?" So, basically, he's laying all this out and. he's letting you know everything that. possibly could have influenced him. imagining this. Yeah. >> To leave it to you, the reader slash.

listener, to decide if it was imagined. or not. I think that's what he's doing. That's how I'm interpreting it. >> Safe. >> That's what Cliffnotee said, at least. >> Yeah. >> The second thing [music] that may have. borne on my dream was this. At dinner, the conversation turned for a moment on. ghosts. English with the certainty of. conviction expressed [music] his belief. that anybody who could possibly believe. in the existence of supernatural. phenomena was unworthy of the [music]. name of an ass burn. The subject. instantly dropped as you can imagine. As.

far as I can recollect, nothing else. occurred or was said that could bear on. what follows. [music]. [clears throat] I needed to take a sip. of water. Chuck. >> unworthy of the name of an ass. >> Yeah, that is pretty low. Yeah, innocence or English is just roasting. people. >> But also, you can see this guy with a a. walrus mustache wearing a pith helmet at. lunch. >> Yeah. >> Being a pompous jerk and everyone's. like, "Okay, well, I'm not going to say. how I feel about it.". >> Yeah, totally. >> So, [snorts] dinner has uh taken place.

and now he's going to bed. And we know. this because he says, "We all went to. bed rather early and personally, I. yawned my way upstairs feeling hideously. sleepy. My room was rather hot, and I. threw all the windows wide, and from. without poured in the white light of the. moon, and the love song of the many. night and gales. I undressed quickly and. got into bed. But though I had felt so. sleepy [music] before, I now felt. extremely wide awake. >> That's the worst. >> Yeah, but this guy was okay with it cuz.

he says, "But I was quite content to be. awake. I did not toss or turn. I [music]. felt perfectly happy listening to the. song and seeing the light. Then it is. possible I may have gone to sleep. [music] and what follows may have been a. dream. I thought anyhow that after a. time the night and gale ceased singing. and the moon sank. I thought also that. if for some explained reason I was going. to lie awake all night, I might as well. read. And I remembered that I had left a. book in which I was interested in the. dining room on the first floor which has.

17 steps [music] and is teddy corner to. the maid's quarters. Each step is but 8. in in depth and made of oak white oak. [laughter]. >> from the black forest. >> Right. >> So I got out of bed, lit a candle, and. went downstairs. I went into the room, saw on a side table the book I had come. to look for, and then simultaneously saw. that the door into the unoccupied.

bedroom was open. >> What? Yeah. Not only that, Chuck, a. curious gray light, not of dawn nor of. moonshine, came out of it, and I looked. in. The bed stood just opposite the. door. A big for poster, beautiful, lots. of carvings hung with tapestry at the. head. Then I saw that grayish light of. the bedroom came from the bed, or rather. from what was on the bed, for it was. covered with great caterpillars of, get.

this, a foot or more in length, which. crawled over it. They were faintly. luminous, and it was the light from them. that showed me the room. Instead of the. sucker feet of ordinary caterpillars, they had rows of pincers like crabs. And. they move by grasping what they lay on. with their pincers and then sliding. their bodies forward. >> This is where it turns creepster, right?

>> Yeah. I mean, you have no idea the sense. of relief when I was like, is this all. just about a sense of dread? Because I. feel like all these stories were just. about a sense of dread. And then when. these crab caterpillars, mutant crab. caterpillars came on the scene, I was. really knocked out. >> It gets even worse though, Chuck. >> Yeah. >> He says that in color, these dreadful. insects were yellowish gray and they. were covered with irregular lumps and. swellings. >> There must have been hundreds of them. These are foot long caterpillars with.

crab pinsers for feet, [laughter]. for they formed a sort of writhing. crawling pyramid on the bed. Occasionally, one fell off onto the. floor with a soft, fleshy thud. And. though the floor was of hard concrete, it yielded to the pinser feet as if it. had been putty. And crawling back, the. caterpillar would mount onto the bed. again to rejoin its fearful companions. They appeared to have no faces, so to. speak, but at one end of them was a.

mouth that opened sideways in. respiration. Yeah. >> All right. I mean, bravo. >> Bravo EFBson for coming up with some. really creepy stuff. >> Yeah, it shocked me. I was uh not. expecting this and now we have a a. genuine sort of monster situation. I. love it. >> You know, I thought this one was going. to get you because you're absolutely. right. Almost all of our previous. stories have been about like a house, an. empty house, and most of the time it is.

just dread. Very few things actually. happen. Something happens here. And it. is fat, lumpy, foot long caterpillars. [laughter]. Hundreds of them on this bed of this. unoccupied room. >> Yeah. I wonder what kind of drugs EF uh. was taking. >> He was passing the ether rag. >> Yeah. What did they have back then? Yeah, probably ether. >> Oh, they had a lot of ether. >> Is it Is it me? Is it time? >> Yeah. Yeah, I think so. >> All right. Then, as I looked, it [music]. seemed to me as if they all suddenly. became conscious of my presence. All the.

mouths at any rate were turned in my. direction and next moment they began. dropping [music] off the bed with those. soft fleshy thuds onto the floor and. wriggling towards me. For one second a. paralysis as of a dream was on me, but. the next I was running upstairs again to. my room and I remember feeling the cold. of the marble steps on my bare feet. Oh, they're marble. They're not oak, >> right? >> Oh well. I rushed on to my, you know, marble is a lot to take care of. So that. that's not the great great choice for a. floor, especially stairs.

>> It's true. And it could have still. possibly come from the black forest. So. >> yeah, maybe. So you got to seal that. stuff though every year or so. >> Yeah. But I I I want to give a little. shout out here, Chuck. This is genuine. You can make a pus out of baking soda. and water only. And you have to make it. kind of thick. >> Okay. But if you have like a wine spot. or something sunk into your marble. countertop, >> put that on there, leave it for a couple. of hours, scrape it off, and wipe it. down. I'm not kidding. Your red wine. spot will be gone from the marble. It's.

a miracle of housekeeping. >> Well, Mr. Fancy Pants, I have no marble, but uh I do drink wine, but I'll keep. that in mind if I'm ever at a fancy. pants house. >> It works. I have limestone on my. countertop, and it works for that, too. Like Oh, yeah. It works for um like. >> for Micah. >> for Micah. It works for whatever the. like a plasticky shiny cabinet door is. made of. >> All right. >> Laminate. It works on laminates. It. works everywhere, man. >> I didn't see this coming. >> I didn't. >> What a turn.

[laughter]. Uh where were we? Fleshy thuds. Uh. paralysis running upstairs. Marble. floors. >> That's right. >> All right. All right. So, he ran up the. marble floors and uh into that bedroom, which is the sensible thing to do. >> Mhm. >> I rushed into my bedroom and slammed the. door behind me. And then I was certainly. wide awake now. I found myself standing. by my bed with the sweat of terror. pouring from them. The noise of the. banged [music] door still rang in my. ears. But, as would have been more. usual, if this had been mere nightmare, the terror that had been mine when I saw.

those foul beasts crawling about the bed. or dropping softly on the floor, did not. cease. Then awake now, if dreaming. before, I did not at all recover from. the horror of dream. Did not seem to me. that I had dreamed. And until dawn, I. sat or stood, not daring to lie down, thinking that every rustle or movement. that I heard was the approach of the. caterpillars. [music]. To them and the claws that bit into the. cement, the wood of the door [music] was. child's play. Steel would not have kept. them out. So basically like this guy's.

just waiting for these caterpillars to. to bumrush him. Yeah. And. >> all night long. >> Yeah. He's saying to himself, "The. horror.". >> Yeah, that's what I'd be saying. But. with the sweet and noble return of the. day, the horror vanished. The whisper of. wind became benignant again. The. nameless [music] fear, whatever it was, was smoothed out and terrified me no. longer. Dawn broke [music] at first. Then it grew dovecoled. I like this. detail, by the way. Then the flaming. pageant of light spread over the sky.

[music]. The admirable rule of the house was that. everybody had breakfast where and when. he pleased, and in consequence, it was. not [music] till lunchtime that I met. any of the other members of our party, since I had breakfast on my balcony and. wrote letters and [music] other things. till lunch. In fact, I got down to that. meal rather late, and the other three. [music] had begun. Between my knife and. fork, there was a small pillbox of. cardboard, [music] and as I sat down, Inglas spoke. Should I do English?

>> Yeah. Okay, >> let's hear what you got. >> Uh, and these are Brits, right? >> Mhm. >> And English is kind of an a-hole, right? >> A little bit. He was the guy wearing the. pith helmet and walrus and over overly. um emphatically stating his opinion as. fact. >> Right. And we know what he does later. So, he's he's an a-hole. >> Mhm. Do look [music] at that. He said, since. you are interested in natural history, I. found it crawling on my couch a pain. last night and I don't [music] know what. it is. You want to pick it up there?

Sure. I think that before I opened. [music] the pill box, I expected. something of the sort which I found in. it. Inside it anyhow was a small. caterpillar, [music]. grayish yellow in color with curious. bumps and excreases on its rings. >> Yeah, >> what a word. >> It was extremely active. Hurried round. the box this way and that. Its feet were. unlike [music] the feet of any. caterpillar I ever saw. They were like. the pincers of a crab. I looked and shut [music] the lid down.

again. >> All right. So, this is These are in real. life now. They're not a foot long, but. they have been realized. >> No. >> So, it wasn't a dream. >> No. Do you want You should be um uh Oh, I don't know that we ever hear his name. Is it the narrator? >> No, I'll be English. You You can be the. narrator. >> Okay. Uh let's see. Um. uh let's see. So, he's terrified. No, I. don't know it. I said, "But it looks. rather unh wholesome. What are you going.

to uh do with it?". >> "Oh, I shall keep it.". >> "Oh," said English. >> "It has begun to spin. I want to see. what sort of moth it turns into.". >> I opened the box again and saw these. hurrying movements were indeed the. beginning of spinning of the web of its. cocoon. Then English spoke again. >> "It has got funny feet, too.". >> He said, "They're like crabs pincers. What's the Latin for crab? Oh, yes. Cancer. So, in case it is unique, let's.

christen [music] it. Cancer Englishensus. [laughter] I love how inevitably all of. your voices end up being an old witch. [laughter]. It's every It's every time. And it's a. great voice, too. So, I'm always very. satisfied when that starts to happen. >> I love it. He He names this thing after. himself. What a jerk. >> I [laughter] know he is. Uh oh. I. continue on. Right. >> Yeah. >> Then something happened in my brain. [music] Some momentary piecing together.

of all that I had seen or dreamed. Something in his words seemed to me to. throw light on it all. And my own. intense horror at the experience of the. night before [music] linked itself onto. what he had just said. In effect, I took. the box and threw it, caterpillar. [music] and all, out of the window. >> This must have been fairly surprising. In the middle of the conversation, he. just picks up the box and throws it out. the window. >> There was a gravel path just [music]. outside and beyond it a fountain playing. into a basin. The box fell on [music] to.

the middle of this. English laughed. So, the students [music] of the occult. don't like solid facts. >> He said, "My poor caterpillar.". >> The talk went off [music] again at once. to other subjects. I can imagine. everybody's a little embarrassed that. all this just. >> So anyway, uh [laughter]. >> how about them Yankees, >> right? >> And I have only given in detail as they. happen these trivialities [music]. in order to be sure myself that I have. recorded everything that could have.

borne on occult subjects [music] or on. the subject of caterpillars. He really wants you to know like I'm. giving you all the all the stuff here. I'm surprised he didn't say what he had. for lunch and breakfast. >> Agreed. But at the moment when I threw. the pillbox into the fountain, I lost my. head. My only excuse is that, as [music]. is probably plain, the tenant of it was. in miniature exactly what I had [music]. seen crowded onto the bed in the. unoccupied room. I think that was an. unnecessary thing to point out.

>> Yeah. And though this translation. [music] of those phantoms into flesh and. blood or whatever it is the caterpillars. are made of ought perhaps to have. relieved some of the horror of the. night, [music] as a matter of fact, it. did nothing of the kind. It only made. the crawling pyramid that covered the. bed in the unoccupied room more. hideously real. >> Yeah, I could imagine. Yeah, I I wouldn't see this thing that. was the the actual like similacrim of. what had scared the Jesus out of me the.

night before that. Why would that make. you feel any better? >> No, agreed. >> You You want me to keep going? It seems. like uh you could do this now. >> All right, I'll take over. >> Okay. After lunch, we spent a lazy hour. or two strolling about the garden or. sitting in the Robert Loia. And it must. have been about 4:00 when Stanley and I. started off to bathe down the path that. led by the fountain into which I had. thrown the pillbox. The water was. shallow and clear, and at the bottom of. it, I saw [music] its white remains. The. water had disintegrated the cardboard,

and it had become no more than a few. [music] strips and shreds of soden. paper. The center of the fountain was a. marble Italian cupid, which squirted the. water out of a out of a wine skin. [music] held under his arm. >> That's not where I was expecting him to. say it was squirting from. Nope. A lot. of times it comes right out of a little. marble pee pee. >> It's a tinkle. >> It's a tinkle. Exactly. And crawling up. its leg was the caterpillar. Strange and. scarcely credible as it seemed, it must. have survived the falling to bits of its.

prison and made its [music] way to. shore. And there it was, out of arms. reach, weaving and waving this way and. that as it evolved its cocoon. Then, as. I looked at it, [music] it seemed to me. again that like the caterpillar I'd seen. last night, it saw me and breaking out. of the threads that surrounded it, crawl. down the marble leg of the cupid [music]. and began swimming like a snake across. the water of the fountain towards me. Oh. my god. It came with extraordinary speed. The. fact of a caterpillar being able to swim.

was new to me. That's in parenthesis, of. course. >> Mhm. >> And in another moment was crawling up. the marble lip of the basin. Just then, English joined us. Why, if it isn't old. canceris. again, he said, catching the [music]. sight of the beast. What a tearing hurry. it is in. We were standing side by side. on the path, and when the caterpillar. had advanced to within about a yard of. us, it stopped and began waving again, as if in doubt as to the direction in. which it should go. Then it appeared to.

make up its mind and crawled onto. English's shoe. "It likes me best," he. said. But I don't really know that I. like it. And as it won't drown, I think. perhaps he shook it off his shoe onto. the gravel path and trod on it. Nice. >> And this English guy just stomps this. thing. >> Yeah. Well, he's the pith helmet type. and they do those kind of things. They. don't have a huge value on bug life.

>> Agreed. >> They didn't even like the movie A Bug's. Life. >> No. Uh, am I starting again? >> Yeah, it feels like you. >> Okay. All afternoon the air got heavier. and heavier with the sorco that was. without doubt coming up from the south. Would you say that is Sarraco or Siroch? >> Uh, I mean Chuck would say. >> well VW always called it Sarraco. >> Oh yeah, those are great cars. >> Yeah, they are. Uh, and that night again.

I went to bed feeling very sleepy. But. below my drowsiness, so to speak, there. was the consciousness stronger than. before that there was something wrong in. the house, that something dangerous was. close at hand. Breaking for water. >> Gulp, gulp. [sighs]. >> But I fell asleep at once, and how long. after, I do not know. either woke or. dreamed I awoke feeling that I must get. up at once or I should be too late. That.

was in italics this time. [music] Then. dreaming or awake parenthesis I lay and. fought this fear telling myself that I. was but the prey of my own nerves. disordered by Sarraco or whatnot and at. the same time quite clearly knowing in. another part of my mind so to speak that. every moment's delay added to the. danger. At last, the second feeling. became irresistible, and I put on my. coat and trousers and went out of my. room onto the landing. And then I saw. that I had already delayed too long, and.

that I was now [music] too late. The whole of the landing of the first. floor below was invisible under the. swarm of caterpillars that crawled. there. The folding doors into the sitting room. from which opened the bedroom where I. had seen them last night were shut, but. they were squeezing through the cracks. of it and dropping one by one through. the keyhole, elongating themselves into. mere string as they passed and growing. fat and lumpy again on emerging.

G. Some, as if exploring, were nosing. about the steps into the passage at the. end of which were English's room. Others. were crawling on the lowest steps of the. staircase that led up to where I stood. The landing, however, was completely. covered with them. I was cut off, and of. the frozen horror that seized me when I. saw that, I can give no idea in words. >> I bet he could if you tried. >> Okay, continuing on, Chuck. Then at. last, a general movement began to.

[music] take place, and they grew. thicker on the steps that led to. English's room. Gradually, like some. hideous tide of flesh, they advanced. along the passage, and I saw the. foremost, visible by the pale gray. luminousness that came from them, reach. his door. He's like, "Better you than. me, English.". >> Yeah. >> Again and again, I tried to shout and. warn him in terror all the time that. they would turn at the sound of my voice. and mount my stare instead. But for all. my efforts, I [music] felt no sound came. from my throat. They crawled along the.

hinge crack of his door, passing through. as they had done before. And still I. stood there making impotent efforts to. shout to him, to bid him escape while. there was time. [snorts] This getting serious. At last. the passage [music] was completely. empty. They had all gone, and at that. moment I was conscious for the first. time of the cold of the marble landing. on which I stood barefooted. The dawn. was just beginning to break in the. eastern sky.

Sunrise always a good sign. >> Yeah, that seems to chase away the the. nasties. >> Yeah. Uh, all right. I'm bringing it. home. >> Yeah, bring us home, Chuck. >> 6 months later, I met Mrs. Stanley in a. country house in England. We talked on. many subjects, and at last she said, >> "Oh, uh, oh, that's me. I'm I'm her.". Oh, yeah. I don't think I've seen you. since I got the dreadful news about. Arthur English a month ago. And this.

guy's still scared, so he says, "I. haven't heard," said I. "No, he's got. cancer. They don't even advise an. operation, for there is no hope of a. cure. He is riddled with it," the. doctors [music] say. Now during all. these six months, I do not think a day. has passed on which I had not had in my. mind the dreams parenthesis or whatever. you like to call them, which I had not. seen in the Villa Cascana. >> It is awful, is it not? [music]. >> She continued, >> "And I feel I can't help feeling that he.

may have caught it at the villa.". "What's a via?" "Caught it at the. villa?". >> I asked. She looked at me in blank surprise. Why did you say that? >> She asked. >> How did you know? >> Then she told me in the unoccupied. bedroom a year before, there had been a. fatal case of cancer. She had, of. course, taken the best advice and had. been told that the utmost dictates of. prudence would be obeyed so long as she.

did not put anybody to sleep in the. room, which had also been thoroughly. disinfected and newly whitewashed and. painted. But. >> that's it. >> Yeah, that's it. >> But ellipses. >> I even went back and and double checked. that I I had copied and pasted. everything. But. >> I did too. >> That was it. [laughter]. >> Yeah, it just ends with uh you know that.

room had cancer in it, it seems like. >> Yeah. And those things transferred. cancer, which explains why they were. lumpy. >> Sure. They were tumorous, I guess you'd. say. And then also when he said that. Arthur English called them cancer. Englishensus, I think. >> Yeah, Englishensus. >> That that kind of tripped something in. his mind. So, yeah. >> So, maybe it's a a vanity uh tale, >> morality tale. >> Was Was it a dream, Chuck, or did he. really experience all this?

>> I think it's all real. >> I do, too. Let's go with that since it's. a good horror story. >> Uh, all right. Moving on, then. Uh we. come to my pick which is uh it's called. the deep browse. >> and it is uh what did I say browse? The. deep drows and it's this is taken from. weird tales. >> uh which volume was this September 1949. the the great pulp rag weird tales. >> and uh this is sort of a mysterious case. because Allison B. Harding is listed as.

the writer but um Allison B. Harding is. a bit of a mystery right? >> Yeah. The the closest I've seen is. someone a master is Gene Milligan, but. um that's pretty far from being proven. without a doubt. >> Yeah, I think so. I've seen various. things. I've seen Gene Milligan or. Lamont Buchanan or maybe a husband wife. team, but it was a nomplum and uh this. is someone who didn't want to be. recognized because they wrote whoever it. was like 10 or 15 stories, most of which.

were in weird weird tales in like the 19. like 40s and 50s and then just sort of. stopped writing and disappeared. >> Yeah. Pretty neat. >> Really interesting. >> I think that they were so adamant about. their um pseudonym because that they. were they were being paid under the. table. Oh, maybe so. >> Mhm. >> Or maybe they had some uh I think one of. them was an attorney or something. So. maybe they didn't like sometimes they. have like a proper job and writing for a. pulp rag wouldn't be looked upon. favorably. >> It would be today because they turned.

out to be one of the great overlooked. horror writers of all time. >> Yeah, agreed. Uh all right, so without. any further ado, uh maybe I'll start. this one out. Does that sound good? >> I think that's a great idea. Uh, this is. the deep brows by pin name Allison B. Harding. >> Did you say brows again? >> I think I did. The deep drows. [laughter] What is my deal? >> I don't know. >> The beep droughts. >> Wow. All right, here we go.

>> Arthur Hodgees had very bad hay fever. He and his wife Francis lived in a. cheerful white painted wood house with a. big stone chimney and a tastefully. designed stone terrace out back. [snorts] That they lived in this house. in the country was one of the factors. that made the Haj's place in the history. of this world secure for whatever. stretch of time there is ahead for. [music] this universe. Everything of. course had to dovetail perfectly. Have. you ever thought about an accident? For. instance, a man who is hit on the head. by a flower [music] pot or a brick. The.

man is say 40 years old and yet the. months and days and hours and seconds of. those 40 years have to be perfectly. synchronized to bring him to that spot. on the sidewalk precisely at the time. that the brick is un loosened by the. wind and [music] sent plummeting on its. mission of death. >> It's very PT Anderson Magnolia setup. >> for sure. >> So it was with the Hajes. Then you see. Arthur Hajes was a writer. That's. important. If everything else had been. perfect, but he hadn't been a writer,

there would have been no record for the. incredible events that [music] follow. Likewise, everything else would have. been upset if Arthur Hajes just hadn't. been a successful writer. Just being a. writer wouldn't have been enough because. his junk, as he called it in his. deprecating fashion, was turned out with. sufficient facility and talent to have. made his name a headliner on many of the. nation's biggest magazines. He had more. than enough money. All this is. important, I think, is what Allison V. Harding is saying.

>> That's right. Uh, money meant two new. autos in the two-car garage out back. His pretty redhead wife Fran dressed. inconspicuously, but in [music] the good. taste, which signals expensive clothes, and this is, of course, the most. important part. He had what he jokingly. confided to his neighbors was a. hermetically [music] sealed study and. bedroom for those summer months when. ragweed, [music] timothy, and other such. deadly pollins would have made his life. in the country quite terrible. They had. a joke Fran and Arthur did from July. through September. He take some.

manuscripts down to the post office to. mail and also provide himself with a few. other errands in town to keep him away a. couple of hours. By the time he got. home, depending on the length of his. mission, Bran could predict almost. exactly how red his eyes would be, how. uncomfortable his nose. >> It's quite a joke. >> All right, so these are uh this is a a. wealthy or at least a wellto-do author. living in the country, but he has very. bad allergies, so he has a safe room. >> Yes, a hermetically sealed one, too. >> That's right. Uh you can pick it up from. there, my friend.

>> All right. Arthur had a habit of coming. in with [music] whatever packages he had. collected in the village, banging the. summer screen door of the porch, and. saying, [music] "Funny thing, darling. I. feel fine. I guess we'll turn off the damn air. conditioning unit and save on our. electric bill.". But this was always announced in a. deeply nasal voice. Oh, let me try that. again. What do you think, darling? [music]. I felt fine. Augustus will turn off the. damn air conditioning unit and save on.

our electric. [music]. >> Oh man, going for it. >> And he would almost immediately subside. into a frenzy of sneezing and wheezing, whereupon his wife would push him into. the study bedroom part of the house, where the engineers, who'd [music]. installed the expensive but efficient. unit, swore not a breath of outside air. could penetrate. Arthur worked in here most of the day. [music] except for periods of never more. than a few hours when he'd play tennis. at the club or used the swimming pool.

there with Fran and his other friends. If there was a bridge game scheduled, it. always took place in Arthur's study. He's got some bad bad allergies. >> Yeah. >> The whole business, in other words, was. [music] accepted by the neighbors and. nobody thought anything about it. If. he'd been poor, Arthur obviously would. have had to suffer or live in the city. as far away as possible from growing. things. But his three months of travail. had now been neatly gotten around by. [music] the Acme air conditioning units.

company, Detroit, Michigan. Of [music] course, it had taken extra. airproofing of the windows so that all. cracks of the two rooms could be. perfectly sealed and that in addition to. the conditioning machines themselves was. expensive. But it kept them both out in. the country, which they liked, and had. become as [music] much a part of their. lives to be taken for granted as the. dishwasher in the kitchen or the. electric door on the garage. [music]. Fancy. Yeah. So now it is easy to see. the component [music] parts of the whole.

affair. Arthur had very bad hay fever, but he liked the country, lived in the. country, [music] and got around his July. through September agonies because he had. the money to purchase for himself a. hermetically sealed refuge. Andy was a. writer. Don't forget that. >> It's actually written in there. >> Yeah. With an exclamation point. >> Yeah. It's a nice little uh summation. Uh shall I take over? >> You shall. >> All right. It was a late afternoon of. August 14th. Fran came back from the. village in the convertible to find.

Arthur out on the lawn practicing with a. putter. She forgot to upgrade him for. his running nose and swollen eyes. because of the important looking. envelope in her hand. A [music] writer's. wife gets to sense these things. Open it up," she ordered. The registered. letter was from a movie company. Hajes. had been bickering with them on his. latest serial for one of the big. magazines. The letter was good news. They were [music] offering to buy and at. the kind of fabulous price that movies. deal in. >> "Well,".

>> said Arthur, holding the open letter in. one hand and clutching for [music] his. pocket handkerchief with the other. >> "Well, that's that's pretty good.". He tried as always to appear. unconcerned, but Fran threw her arms. around his neck and gave him a big kiss. "You're wonderful, darling," she cried. gay. He sighed, trying not to show how. pleased he [music] was with the news at. her attentions. >> "At least this will pay for the air. conditioner for another summer." "Man, how did she tolerate this guy? >> I don't know, but she is pretty pretty.

kind to him, it seems.". >> Uh then Fran took him by the elbow and. steered him inside. [music] "You get. back into the cave," she ordered him. It. was their pet name for their sanctified. haven of pure manufactured pollen-free. [music] air. The breeze died down and. with the wind gone, it grew very hot. Fran prepared a cold supper and brought. it into Arthur's den. She thought it was. actually much nicer here than outside. where the humidity had become. oppressive. She looked out across the. green country from the window of the. study and noticed in the failing light. the pockets of fog clinging to the lower.

lies of land. art," she said, turning. away from her contemplation of the. window scene [music] and spooning up. some of her potato salad. "It's nice detail.". >> Mhm. >> She said, "I think we ought to celebrate. your latest triumph." She went back to. American, by the way. >> Okay. >> She forgot where she was from for a. moment. He made a deprecating gesture. [music] with his hand. No, I really mean. it. We haven't seen some of the old gang. for a while. Jack and Cynthia, for. instance. We ought to really have them. out. And then there's Tim and Mary.

Let's have quite a party. He warmed to the idea, thinking about it. as she went. She took some plates into. the other part of the house and got some. ice cream out of the [music] freezer to. bring it back to the study. She noticed. then how warm the rest of the house was. after the clean, cool air of the cave. As an afterthought, she decided first to. bring a deck chair in that they had left. on the terrace where she had been. sunning herself in shorts earlier that. day. When Fran went outside, she noticed. again the oppressive [music] heaviness. of the air. Made it hard to breathe. It. made her sleepy. With evening. approaching, the darkening sky was.

burned with purple and orange. She. thought it probably meant another. blisterer tomorrow. [music] She went. back into the cave with the ice cream in. the plates, slammed the special door, which her medically sealed it. They. started talking about their plans again. This was the night of August 14th, the. night which would initiate Arthur Hajes. to the part he [music] would play, which. in its way would make him as famous in. the sweep of history as the names of. Darwin or Columbus or or. Fran, aside from being pretty, was a.

methodical girl. She was self-appointed. watchdog of the budget. [music]. No, darling, Fran insisted. It would be. a lot of fun to have a celebration. Next. weekend would be fine. And she mentioned. his very best friends, the Fisks and the. Barnes. Big guns. I'm going to call. them, she said resolutely. >> No, you try it, Tim. >> Arthur [music] suggested. He's one of. those office wretches, and you'd simply. remind Barry that he wasn't home yet. It's nearly 8:00, said Fran.

reproachfully, [music] with a new look. at the small desk clock getting ready to. tinkle the news. I'll try Jack and. Cynthia. Doodling with a phone pad, she. noted the time, 8:00 p.m. Just as the. clock chimed out musically, she asked. the operator for the Fisk's number and. waited for three rings. Cynthia, she. helloed to the feminine [music] voice. that answered. It's Fran Hodes. >> Uh, take it away. >> I will, but first I want to point out. happily that Tinkle has made an. appearance in both stories now.

>> Oh, that's [laughter] right. Two. Tinkles. >> Arthur could hear the other girl squeal. with delight over the phone. Fran began. to explain the [music] invitation, and. from his wife's expression and the. noises from the earpiece, Arthur, from. the other side of the room, could tell. that the invitation had gone over well, and the girls [music] were about to get. on all sorts of other subjects. He came. over. Say hello to Cynthia for let me. speak to that shya husband of hers. Friend wrinkled up her nose in mock. anger at [music] this interruption of.

their gossip. But after all, it was his. night. >> Cynthia, where's Jack? >> She relayed over the phone. >> "Oh, so early. Well, throw some water on. him or something. Art wants to speak to. him.". >> She covered the mouthpiece [music] with. her hand. >> Old age has crept up on the. barristister. Sin says he's sleeping on. the living room sofa. >> Probably had one [music] too many on the. way home. Art put in irreverently. >> Oh, Jack. >> Friend's attention was called back to. the phone.

>> Don't make your excuses to me. If I were. your wife, I'd make you do the dishes. That would keep you awake. Here's my. genius husband with a momentous word for. you. It's probably a lie, Jack, about. his latest golf score. Don't believe it? >> Fran handed the receiver over to her. husband. Hello counselor said Art into. the phone. They talked and [music] joked. and then Jack relayed through Art to. Fran. Some thought about a big case he. had coming up at the end of next week. If it broke in a certain [music] way, he'd probably not be able to make it or. at least it would be difficult. He was.

hearing from the client involved. As a. matter of fact, later that evening, Fran. made another face and took the phone. away from Art. >> Jack, put Cynthia back on. You men. always louse everything up. Look, Sen, [music] after Jack has heard from this. old client, you call us back tonight, will you? Oh, we'll be up till well. after midnight. How is it in there? Hot? I bet it is. We're in the cave now to. cure Art Snipples. I stepped outside for. a minute after supper, and there wasn't. a breath of air, even here in the. country. You be sure and do that, Sin.

We'll wait for you. We're going to call. Tim and Mary Barnes. We thought we'd get. them cuz uh you and Jack can always beat. them at bridge, huh? And Art loves Mr. Barnes because he once took him in a. golf match. Hear from you later, baby. >> Fran hung up. It was 8:30. >> Fran's a real pistol. >> Mhm. >> We really shouldn't have talked so long, >> she reproached. >> But I guess we can afford it now, can't. we, genius?

>> Art ruffled her hair and then kissed an. auburn curl on the top of her head. Night rates, he murmured. That's what. I'm counting on. Try Tim and Mary. Old. man Barnes ought to be home from his. vulgar money-making pursuits by now. Gee, I'm glad I don't commute to the. city every [music] day and then come. back to some suburban neighborhood house. that looks so much like the neighbors on. either side. You have to be careful you. don't go in the wrong door and catch. someone else in life. >> You You skirted very closely to Homer. Simpson there for a second.

>> I did. That was complete accident. I've. never been able to do Homer, but now I. know the secret. >> That's amazing. >> Yes, agreed. Uh, I just amazed myself. Should I continue? >> Uh, sure. >> Fran gave the suburban number that. belonged to the barns, and Art stole the. phone from her hand. The study window. showed that it was completely dark. outside. Now, "Mrs. Barnes," Arthur. boomed. "These are your longlost country. cousins, the hodgees.". He frowned a bit, and after a moment. passed the phone back to his wife. His.

mouth formed the words, "Think we. disturbed them." Fran carried on nobly. Tim wasn't back from the city yet. Was. it beastly hot there? Couldn't be much. worse off in the city. Oh yes, Fran. nodded to reassure Mary. She'd just. talked to the Fisks, and they said the. city was simply unbearable. Poor Tim. What was keeping him? Well, anyway, you. two need a vacation in the country. How. about [music] next weekend? Look, we'll. call again a bit later after Tim's home. She hung up. >> Funny, >> Fran said. Right.

>> Well, I mean, we lead this bucolic life. of solitary splendor where you can't see. your nextdoor neighbor's house [music]. without a telescope. We're supposed to. be lazy and going to weed while our city. friends and their first cousins, the. suburbanites, are still supposed to be. in there swinging with their eyes on the. main chance. >> What's the point? [music] Arthur asked. >> Well, nothing exactly, >> replied Fran. >> Except when we call these live wires, Jack sounds asleep at the end of a big. career punching day. and Mary. Well, I. kind of had the sneaky feeling we woke.

her up. >> Art nodded. I think you're right. Well, I always said this was the racket out. here in the real country. >> Aren't you glad that I agree with you? >> Fran came over to his side and rumpled. his hair. >> You wouldn't like it so much out here. without me. >> Honey, he said and kissed her. >> Then he had a thought. You didn't put. the garage door down, did you? >> No, but silly. Don't bother about it. It's not going to rain or snow tonight.

>> Might as well, said Art, [music]. principal of the thing and all that, you. know. >> Silly, silly, >> said Fran. >> And you [music] might get sneezing. again. >> I hope I do, so I can come back here and. really appreciate what this setup is. costing me. >> Homer, >> what was it again? >> Yeah, just a little tinge. A homeriic. tinge. This also has just evolved into a. John Chver story where a couple in the. country is trying to get their city. friends to come out for a night of. bridge. >> Totally.

>> You want to take it? Good. >> call. Uh, sure. He went out and into the. unairconditioned part of the house. It. was very warm and almost immediately he. began to sweat. God, how it must be in. the city. He started out the back door. and found he couldn't see a thing in the. starless night. He came back and got the. torch [music] that hung in the coat. closet, followed its rays to the garage. He thumbmed the down switch that. controlled the electric doors and they. rumbled into place. Because he got. pleasure out of the accutra that science. had designed for easier living, he. thumbmed the up switch [music] and. watched the doors rise again. Door goes.

up, door goes down. Uh, it was neat the whole operation. He. let them descend and then stood there. with the flash turned off trying to see. if his eyes would grow accustomed to the. gloom. Somewhere out towards where the. [music] bird bath stood, a firefly. pricked the wall of blackness. momentarily. He shone the light and. [music] picked up the marble path. Ah, more marble. >> Mhm. >> You know what's good for that? >> Uh, a pus made of baking soda and some. water. >> That's right. Arthur walked a few steps. away from the house in the garage, past.

the bird bath towards the field, [music]. enjoying the freedom of these few steps, as someone does who has even the. relatively inoffensive restriction that. he did. "Things always look different at. night," he reminded himself as [music]. he torched the yellow beam of the. flashlight here and there. The trees and. shrubbery had a particular lifeless. aspect, as though they were prop. scenery. From the ridge that crowned the. southern horizon of his property, the. [music] farway lights of a speeding car. shoveled the gloom back for a few. instance, and then with a vehicle gone. on its dark errand, there was nothing.

but the little light in his hand, the. occasional, very seldom pin prick of a. firefly off to [music] the left, or. perhaps over to the right. >> Anyway, >> just not in front of him. >> Right. The ground underneath his. moccasins had its fine sheen of night. dew. He could feel the taller blades of. grass swish damply against his ankles as. [music] he walked. Uh from out of the. endless blackness that stretched away. from where he stood across the universe, something came that blinked green and. red in the sky. It was the mail plane. heading for the state capital 100 miles.

north. [music] And idly he turned his. flash upward and pinched the switch in a. staccato series. Then thinking foolishly. of the action, flicked it off. To them, if anything, it would be as a firefly. was to him, a tiny indistinct something. for an instant against the paw of. darkness that [music] covered the earth. >> I I just want to add here, Chuck, that. if if you listener like me thought that. that was going to become something later. on, it doesn't. >> Well, it sort of does. The plane. >> Yeah. Well, him flashing the plane, I.

thought something bad was going to come. of it, and nothing does whatsoever. >> Yeah, you're right. But you know, if a. plane flies over in act one, it may not. fly over in act three. >> That's true. It's. >> a spoiler. Yeah. >> The plane fled from him into the. northern night. Fled as though afraid. And a feeling of momentous loneliness. welled up inside of him, making him turn. abruptly so he could see the lights of. the house. Their house. Branson his. You. know, their house. The one they live in. Just right there where he just came. from. >> Sometimes off to the left, sometimes off.

to the right. [laughter]. He walked rapidly back and this time. secured the front and back [music] doors. and windows for the night before. rejoining Fran in the cave. >> "Uh, you can pick it up, but I believe. I'm Fran.". >> "You are.". >> "Nobody's called,". >> she said petulently. >> "Have you been outside all this time. fussing with that old garage door that. tickles you so?". >> He nodded. >> "How many sneezes?". >> "Not one," he avowed, surprised at the. realization himself. She squinted at him. dubiously. a pon by honor. He put a hand.

on his heart and raised the other. I. don't think there's enough air out there. to blow the old pollen about. Mighty. stuffy. He sank down in a chair and. enjoyed the cool pure oxygen of the. room. I tell you, Fran, this thing's worth it. I mean, even if you didn't have an. allergy or ghastly hay fever or. anything. >> I'm picturing uh Dennis Hopper now in. Blue Velvet. >> sucking off that mask. Yeah, I was. trying for Dennis Miller. [laughter].

>> Kquap. [snorts]. >> This is silly, >> Fran said after a while longer. >> I'm going to call the Fisk. They. promised to call and they have it. >> Fran picked up the receiver and it was. just past 10:30. Arthur went over and. sat beside her, held his head close to. hers. >> Eavesdropper, >> she whispered. They both. >> Eve Dropper. >> They both had the same reaction when the. voice answered as they said afterward. And as Arthur wrote it, it was, "Don't. forget he's a writer and he's wealthy.".

It was Cynthia's voice. And yet it. wasn't. Arthur's first thought was that. she'd been drinking. Fran more. charitably thought that she was ill. >> Darling, you were going to call. Where's. Jack? You sound a little funny. >> Cynthia talked, and as she talked, her. voice got stronger. It was so terribly. hot there in town. She apologized. Finally, Jack came to the phone groggy. in voice, too. Yes, his client had. called up quite a long time ago. It had. been kind of unsatisfactory, but hang it.

all, they'd come out the next weekend. >> Uh, I guess that should be Cynthia. Am I. going to Montipython this whole thing? >> Mhm. >> All right. All right. Who is Cynthia? Who is Cynthia? Um, >> what's her motivation? >> Yeah, exactly. Well, she's she's not. sounding well, too, though, right? >> No, she sounds very tired. >> Okay. >> Gee, I think we need to get away. >> Cynthia confided. Jack's just worn out and I feel pretty. bush, too. >> Then Fran couldn't get Cynthia's. attention for a few minutes. And when.

the other girl came back on the phone, she had an edge of excitement in her. voice. Chuck, >> can you hear that, Fran? I mean, over. the phone. Listen as I hold the. mouthpiece this way. Can you hear it? >> Fran listened intently, and Arthur. pressed his ear as close to the receiver. as he could. There was something like a. hissing radiator or a boiler letting off. steam. Cynthia came back on. >> I don't know. I I think the heat's got. us. We just love to come out to the. country and stay.

>> before they rang up, which means hang. up. Hung up. Cynthia dropped the phone once and had. to pick it up. Fran hung up worried. Drunk, said Arthur. His hay fever had. come back. >> Don't be silly, >> his wife. Is it remmonstrated? >> I think remmonstrated. Okay. >> Or I don't know. Remonstrated sounds. right, too. >> But also, it looks a lot like. demonstrated, but the D and the R were. switched at birth. >> That's right.

>> Don't be silly. >> Oh, his wife remmonstrated. [music]. Remonstrated. >> She doesn't drink, Jack. Maybe once in a. while, but she [music] doesn't. I'm. worried. I think they're both sick. Like. food poisoning or something. >> So, now his hay fever is coming in and. out by the second. Well, as long as it's. over by next weekend, [music]. Arthur put in. Go ahead, try the barns. And my little technique didn't work as. well as I thought, but I was ramming the. sides of my nose, trying to come in and.

out of a nasely quality, and I can tell. you. >> from experience, it doesn't work. >> Okay, don't try it at home. >> Fran gave the number and waited. [music]. The connection took quite a while. And. when it was made, Arthur saw his wife's. face tighten. I can [music] hardly hear you, Mary. What is it? Yes, it's Fran Hodgeges. We're calling up [music] about next. weekend. What? Mary, it's awfully hard. to understand. You must be a bad. connection. What's wrong with Tim?

>> Arthur was watching her expression from. the lounge chair. >> Yes, he's probably been working too. hard. You don't sound too spray. yourself, my chicken. Hey, listen. You. both need a rest. What? Hear what? Fran's face blanched a bit then. And her. eyes saw Arthur's. >> Now you just pack yourself into bed, young lady, and make your plans tomorrow. morning with that overworked. money-making husband of yours. Come out. before the weekend. Have Tim knock off. Come out Wednesday or Thursday. We'd.

love to have you anytime. >> Fran hung up slowly. >> I think our friends are all giving out. She sounded awfully funny and said, "Oh, you men are terrible." She said she. couldn't seem to wake Tim up. [music]. That he got back from the station and. just sort of collapsed. >> Apparently, it's catching. >> Arthur commented, >> "The barns in the fit separated by what, 50 or 60 miles, and your theory is that. they both got food poisoning from the. same bad oysters.

>> We might need subs for you. >> Can you understand what he's saying. essentially?" So, this is what I'll do. I'll read it like that unintelligably. and then I'll explain what he just said. >> It's sort of like uh uh Gary Oldman and. Slow Horses. You really need to turn. those subs on. >> Okay. I don't know the reference, but I will. do what you say. >> Oh, you don't watch Slow Horses? I. thought you watched that. >> No. Is it a TV show? >> Yeah. >> Is it a limited series? >> Uh, no. I think it's in season five or. so. It's great.

>> I tried Tulsa King last night and was. like, I'm just not in the mood for any. like mean bullying right now. So, I. didn't go any further than the first. like 15 minutes. >> Oh, I have not seen that. But, uh, friend of the show, Kevin Pollock, is in. the new season. >> He sure is. >> Yeah, they shooting here in Atlanta. >> Oh, I didn't know that. It looks a lot. like Tulsa. >> I think they do some exteriors here. >> I see. >> All right. Anyway, uh, is this me? >> Uh, yeah. >> All right. Fran smiled. It's funny. though, Art, about one thing. She said.

something about hissing, too, just like. sin. Fran's hand came up to her mouth. and her eyes got bigger. Darn. You don't. suppose you don't suppose it's any sort. of enemy attack? You know that article. we read about, you know, the way when. war came this time. Arthur laughed. hardily. >> Oh, okay. Uh, so by a quick instant poll. on social media, we've decided that. Arthur's um hay fever nose should go. away. >> Oh, no. Snap poll.

>> Yeah. Now, wait a minute. I'm supposed. to be the one with the imagination. I. make money out of it and you're doing it. for free. >> She relaxed, but he saw the puzzlement. was still on her face. To reassure her, he switched the radio on and the sounds. of a jazzy record filled the study. The. MC [music] came on sounding sleepy, but. then they all do and have for ages. There was certainly no momentous, [music] we interrupt this program to. bring you a special bulletin. The. president has just announced that this. country has been attacked by and so.

forth. Nothing like that. He sounded. like Peewee Herman. >> Beijing Mr. Herman. >> That's right. [laughter]. >> It's one of my favorite parts of that. movie. >> It was great. >> He saw that Fran's fright had passed, but then she said resolutely, "Turn. [music] that thing down, Art, will you? I'm going to call Jack and Cynthia. again.". >> So, we did another snap pole, and it. turns out people did like the nasly. voice after all. >> Great. It's back. >> Now, look, this time you really are. going to wake them up. It's getting hot. towards midnight. But Art knew his wife,

and when she was determined to do. something, she did it. Luckily, he. reflected many times in the past, it. usually had turned out to be the right. thing. He shrugged his shoulders and. said half- jokingly, "Well, I warned. you. After this, they'll never even. think of accepting our invitation next. weekend. We'll be at their doghouse for. weeks.". >> Fran dialed the operator, gave the. number, and in the interim before the. connection was made, the quiet of the. country seemed to press from the black. out of doors around them in this lit. oasis of the night. Takes that operator. an awfully long time, said Fran aloud.

Finally, the ringing commenced. It. seemed interminable to Art sitting on. the other side of the room. At last, there was an answer, for Fran said, Hello, Cynthia. But all was not well, Art knew from the way his wife's hand. tightened to whiteness around the. receiver. Fran seemed to be explaining, pleading, and finally Arthur came to her. side and spoke down to her upturned. face. "What's the matter?". >> She shook her head. He took the phone. and a sloth's voice assailed him, droning on. Fran was sitting on the edge.

of her chair, terrified. >> "Cynthia,". >> he called sharply. >> "What's wrong? Are you ill? Where's. Jack? Put him on.". >> He could barely make sense out of this. thing. Cynthia was saying slowly, laboriously, as though drugged or sick, that Jack had passed out, and that. funny, she couldn't seem to get any. help. He listened for a moment more and. then hung up quickly. He dialed for the. operator and after long seconds she came. on. >> I'm going to call Dr. Mcllum in town.

You remember him? >> Fran nodded approval. >> So something really weird is going on. with everybody. >> Yeah. This is no John Chverber. Oh, >> I think I suspect it has something to do. with the um shrubbery looking like movie. props. >> Yeah. >> Oh, I'm going to start up again. You. ready? >> Yeah, I'm ready. >> He was a physician they'd known. This is. Dr. from Mcllum who arts calling. He was. a physician they'd known when they lived. not many blocks away from the Fisks. The. McCollum connection seemed to take an.

eternity and then there was a voice at. the other end. Arthur asked for the. doctor and the voice said slowly, >> "Dr. Mcum. speaking.". >> Hodgees identified himself and told what. he thought that the Fisks, good friends. [music] of his, were apparently unable. to get aid. Could Dr. from a column go. himself or get someone. There was a long. pause. Then the voice answered, >> "Funny, Hajes, damn funny. Something.

strange.". >> There was a noise and an interruption. Arthur's hellos brought no new response. [music] He kept us back to Fran as he. hung up for fear she would find fuel for. her fright and his expression. He would. try the barns. The minutes ticked away. Their village operator was apparently. No, here she was. He gave the number and. there was another long wait and then the. sound of ringing [music] in the city. suburb. He waited no usual time but.

allowed fully 5 minutes. Finally, he. pictured the scene. The phone was. dragged from its cradle. It was Tim, a. lethargic Tim, who slurred his words. Arthur asked Tim if Mary was all right. Asleep, >> was the mumbled answer. >> You know what's happening? >> What? The deep browse. >> The beep drows. >> The beep drows is happening. >> Uh, okay. Arthur spoke quickly. Then. >> I want you to listen to me carefully. Call a doctor, Tim, or your local. police. Do it immediately. Do you hear.

me? >> Hear you? >> Echoed the voice weakly. Tell him. Tell. them how you feel and ask for help. Do. that, Tim. Do it right away. The voice. at the other end gurgled something. unintelligably. [music]. Arthur cradled the phone. He turned. squarely to face Fran. Something. happened, darling. I don't know what. See what you can get on the radio. She. jumped at his bidding. He was at the. phone again, dialing, dialing. Finally,

the operator sounding like Cynthia, like. Dr. McCullum, like Tim. The police, he said distinctly. Great. band. Give me the police. The operator's fumblings were audible. He heard her mouth the word police as a. drunk would, but at last her instinctive. reflexes taking over, he guessed. The. connection was made. A gruff male voice. mumbled what might have been. >> police headquarters. >> And then subsided into a deep long yawn.

before Arthur had a chance to say. anything. "Look, this is Arthur. Hodgeges," [music] he persevered. I've. been calling some friends about it. around the country and and I don't know. what it is, but everybody acts kind of. drugged. The policeman's gruff voice mumbled. something about. >> just drunks, >> yawned again and became quiet. Hello. Hello, shouted Arthur. There was no. response. He hung up finally. >> Darling, >> Frank called in a small frightened.

voice. darling. >> from the other side of the room. >> There seems to be an awful lot of. silences on the air, even for past one. >> But even as she spoke, a cacophony of. jazz broke into the still room, and they both brightened with the noise. of a saxophone being strangled over and. over again. "Can't knock the drive down," he said in. an attempt at lightness. They sat and. waited for what neither knew. Fran kept.

looking at the telephone and they both. had their ears glued to the radio. It. was a typical allnight disc jockey show. The records set up in a series. beforehand and automatically playing one. after another, but without the MC's. comments between each. That was Arthur's. fear, but he did not give words to it. He knew Fran and he knew what she was. thinking. He was thinking himself. Somehow something had happened. The record on now was something by Andre. [music] Costell. It had a noisome.

crashing crescendo at the end. The silence following it was by contrast. even heavier. No other record, no voice. making between disc comments. They both. waited, smiled bravely inside their. heads, thinking the next minute, the. next second. There are silences on the. air. Suppose you had to go to the. washroom. Even disc jockeyies are human. Somebody will come on. But there was. nothing. Finally, they knew it.

They looked at each other and Arthur. managed another smile. Fran's answering. grin like the radio lacked life. To keep. busy, to keep from saying anything, Arthur picked up the phone again. He. held it free for 15 minutes, dialing at. intervals. But there was no operator and. the telephone was as dead, as if he must. wait till tomorrow for it to be. invented. >> All right. Should I pick it up? >> Mhm. >> All right. Here we go. There were still. the dial numbers left to him, and one. after another, Arthur methodically.

dialed the numbers of friends and. acquaintances hereabouts. The phones. would ring, each with their different. timber, but there were no answers. Across the dark brow of the town, with. its mantle of night, from this valley. and this ridge on across the black. shrouded lanes and bales and hills, [music] the phones chimed and vibrated. and rang and shrilled. But they stopped. only when he admitted defeat by hanging. up. Across this town, and further, much. further as he knew, there seemed no one. A peculiar theory was forming in. Arthur's mind. After all, they were all.

right, unaffected. Apparently, there was. a Mr. Hoskins, a small bent man who was. caretaker at the movie house. He took. tickets and often worked in the. projection room and slept in the. barn-like building at night, for he, like Arthur, was a hay fever sufferer. The building was air conditioned, even. though not with the scientific. perfection of the cave. Anyway, Hoskins. swore it helped. So Arthur called the. theater knowing that the late movie. would have been out now for about an. hour. The phone was downstairs. He could. picture it from his and Fran's. excursions there by a window in the.

lobby. Hoskins room was above. The phone. rang and rang. It was like those others. As he was about to give up, a click made. it suddenly importantly different. And. there was Hoskins, his old man's. quavering voice, sleepy and quirless. But it made sense as he understood when. Arthur identified himself. >> Liz, Mr. Hawkets. Listen very carefully. Your life may depend on it. >> The other man made some protest about. Was this a joke? But Arthur went on. >> Whatever you do, whatever you do, Mr.

Hoskins, don't go. >> But the caretaker broke in. >> I think you're the caretaker. If. anybody, you were born to play that. part. >> That's right. >> Wait up, Mr. Hodgeges. Mr. Hodges, through the window here, I can see into. the street. There's really some people. lying there, Mr. Hodes. Think there must. have been an accident. I'll have to go. out and see. >> See, that was wonderful. I could not. have come up with that one. >> Uh, take it over.

>> Oh, even as Arthur screamed at the man, screamed, "No, no. Whatever you do, don't go out.". >> He knew it was too late. The phone. clicked and Hoskins was off on his. errand. "There must be others like. that," Arthur reasoned. in the country, in the state, the nation. But who knew. how broad this was or what it was? But. had those others any chance without. knowing suspecting? Arthur made up his. mind. Brad, I'm going out of bed. She. was on her feet, her arms around him, tears very close to the surface.

>> No, Art. Please don't. Please, please. Something's terribly wrong. Don't leave. me. >> He held her gently and caressed her red. hair. Only for a second, Fran. Honey, I'm trying to dope this thing out. >> It's war, isn't it, Art? Some kind of. poison gas? >> I don't know, honey, but it's the best. that I can take a turn around outside. I. won't go far, but we've got to know. what's going on. >> You mean, >> she said hopefully. >> We might be in some sort of pocket here.

on the ridge that doesn't get the gas. >> Could be, he said. But it was a forloren. hope. He took the flashlight and she. walked him to the door of the cave, her. fingers entwined tightly in his. >> If you're not back in 10 minutes, I'm. coming out. >> Don't worry, Fran. He opened the door. abruptly and shut it as quickly, walking. rapidly through the other part of the. house. The air impressed him. immediately. It was flat and had a. peculiar stale quality, although some of. this he discounted as being the result.

of having just come from the pure oxygen. [music] of the cave. They left that part. out. They're breathing pure oxygen in. the cave. Yeah, seems foolish. He didn't. bother to turn on the other house. lights, but used his flash instead. The. bright wallpaper and the cheerful chints. on the chairs looked strangely forlororn. and unreal. [music]. Outside, the black world was very quiet, as quiet as any 2:00 a.m. As he stood on. the terrace, he first noticed. lightadedness. A feeling of illness. touched the [music] pit of his stomach,

and the palms of his hands began to. sweat unduly. He fought it back as best. he could, listening, [music] looking for. any other sound or sign in the night. around of human movement, a car [music]. light from the state highway up the. ridge, a plane in the heavens, a train. whistle in the distance. There was. nothing. There might not have been in. this chosen space of time at this hour. anyway, but it was peculiarly. disturbing. His brain was suddenly dull and very. lonely. He wanted to sit there and then.

on the terrace, to recline, to put the. flashlight down, loosen his belt and his. collar. He turned and sped for the door. [music] of the house, his heart. pounding, lights within his head. Despite himself and the chiding that it. was purely psychological, he yawned and. knew the [music] yawn was real. Fatigue. and sleepiness had struck suddenly like. a heavy dose of seditive. Still going? >> Yeah. >> All right. He found the knob and jerked. it open, walked through the dark.

corridors of the unlit part of the. house, and thankfully reached the door. of the cave, yanked it open, and went. in. His face showed more than he wanted. it to, for Fran came over to him, and. there were tears in her eyes. "Are you. all right, Arthur?" He nodded his head. and tried to smile, but the heaviness. was still on him. He turned his head. away so she wouldn't see his yawn, and. sat down very suddenly. His wristwatch. told him that he'd been gone but 8. minutes, a very short time, so that if. Fran's [music] hunch about the poison. gas was right, it must be a fairly.

potent one to strike so fast. In the. oxygen of the cave, Hajes soon felt. better. As the small hours of the. morning wore on, he made trips [music]. into other parts of the house, quick. trips, for his tolerance to the outside. seemed to grow less and less. The almost. incredible drowsiness became stronger. and he could stay away less long each. [music] time. >> All right. But in those trips, he. brought every bit of food in the house. back to the cave. Some sterno cans and.

whatever odds and ends he decided they. might need. At 5:00 a.m. they held what. he called [music] a council of war. There was, Arthur admitted, something. going on. What it was, he didn't know. and couldn't guess. But they were. particularly lucky for their. hermetically sealed quarters in [music]. the oxygen supply. They ran the radio. dial up and down at intervals and found. only silence. Arthur tried Hoskins again. on a forlorn chance. There was no. answer. No operator answered when he. dialed the zero. >> "We seem to be alone right now,".

>> he admitted. The first threads of gray. were streaking the eastern view when. Arthur packed Fran onto the couch with a. blanket around her and saw her drift. [music] off for a little nap. He sat at. the desk and calculated the two most. important items of their lives now, food. and oxygen. of the well, you need water. That's really the most important. >> You forgot that part. >> Of these, the latter was a prime. significance. The canned goods, he felt, could be rationed to last almost. indefinitely. They'd had quite a stock. in the kitchen cabinets, but the oxygen,

[music]. he toted up the number of fresh. cylinders available. Seems like that. should be totaled, but whatever. >> With continuous use, usually they turn. the mechanism off to save on the. precious stuff. >> That's the spirit of EFBson. >> That's right. Their supply would last at. the most 7 or 8 days. It [music] was. unthinkable that by then some. explanation or solution to this whole. business would not be found. At the. worst [music] in that time, an enemy. would take possession, but they would at. least be free from their present. dilemma. It was daylight when Fran woke. up and the sun was a molten gold burning.

a hole through the hazy sky. As on the. previous evening, the trees stood. silent, almost too tired to hold up. their limbs. The breath of the air. stirred. It was though the outside, all. outside, was a vacuum. [music] They. opened some cans and ate. And then. Arthur went into the adjacent bedroom. and slept till noon. When he awoke and. rejoined Fran in the [music] study, her. fright had surged upward again. He found. out why almost immediately she'd. admitted she'd gone out. There was some. [music] small thing she wanted to get. The feeling art. It was so terrible. I.

couldn't fight against it. It was It was. like when you take ether at the hospital. and you begin to float. You fight and. fight, but it's stronger than you are. I. just got back here. or I almost fell. outside the door, but I got back." It. angered him a little, for he had been. asleep, and if she failed to get back, he wouldn't have known until probably. too late. They swore not to leave the. cave here at all, unless absolutely. necessary, and then only while the. others stood by inside to perform rescue. work if need be. They spent hours. talking, wondering, speculating. They.

coaxed and weedled the radio for sounds. that would not come. commercials and. soap operas and fivepiece bands became. precious by their very absence. And. then, as a writer will, under almost any. circumstances, Arthur found his way to. the typewriter and began tapping the. keys. Fran said with mock pestilence, "My God, you're not going to do a story. now." "Darling, you've forgotten, but we. don't know if you have any audience left. anywhere.". The joke fell flat, perhaps too.

frightfully true for all they knew to be. funny. Uh, we took another snap poll and. everyone agrees that I should do Arthur. as euphoric. >> Oh wow. >> No, Fran. >> Arthur replied seriously. >> I just want to put the dope down on this. thing since last night. Sort of a. chronology. You know, you can fuss with. those tin cans and so I like to keep. busy. I might as well be this. >> And he began to bang away at the. typewriter. Take it away. At first, time.

passed very slowly, as though the weight. of doubt that clouded their minds clung. to the hands of the clock slowed them so. that one wondered if time too had become. affected by the lethargy of the outside. world. Occasionally, Arthur or Fran, one. or the other of them, would go to the. phone, dial the operator, or some. familiar, unfamiliar number series. There was ringing showing that the. inanimate senus of wire and electricity. and mechanical appliances were still. alive, but nothing else. and the radio. hummed. The small needle that moved.

across the dial from low to high. kiloycles, touching the familiar. stations that customarily fed so much. noise, both human and instrument, into a. nation's ear, found nothing on its. course. They spent much time at the. windows of the study and bedroom off of. it. They looked out at the countryside, so green with August, so familiar with. things they had done. Why there, see. from the window was a divot dug in the. lawn where Arthur had practiced his golf. swing. Now in the late afternoon there.

was still some haze across the land, but. the sun had burned part of it away. Still though, there was no wind, and all. of the outside had the flat, motionless. appearance of scenery. Weird. Without giving voice to their. reason, both Arthur and Fran took. themselves to the window at 6 p.m. A. four motor commercial passenger plane. always shot over just southward at the. time. It was a twilight flight that. impressed itself on them with the roar. of its high-speed, heavy motors. Arthur. had joked once that he could even feel.

the vibration sitting in his bathtub. 6. came and went, as did 6:15, a quarter of. an hour later, which is appropriate. Towards 6:30, Fran said, "Matter of. factly, >> I guess there's no plane either.". >> Arthur turned from the window and. translated that fact onto paper. It was. after supper out of cans that Fran, sitting cross-legged on the floor, asked. suddenly, >> "What are we going to do? We can stay. here only so long. Suppose we're the.

only people.". >> She left the sentence unfinished, and. her fingers went to her temples. He. bosched and poo pooed. But much later, after she was asleep in the bedroom, he. examined the oxygen [music] supply, computed the number of full cylinders. left, and adjusted the flow of the. precious air downward. The days went a. little faster then, as though for spite. Arthur worked some of the time at his. typewriter, and France stood looking. over his shoulder, not once again saying. what she'd said first. >> "But darling, who's going to read this?".

>> If it had been a joke then, it was not. now. The telephone? It might as well be. that the wires were cut. Radio likewise. It was like a detective play. Cat in the. Canary or people marooned on an island. And the most important people in their. lives were the long gray oblong. cylinders with the silver diamond-shaped. [music] labels that said oxygen, dangerous, inflammable, which means. flammable. They were people. They lived or at least.

they contributed life. and their two. lives would last just so long. >> Darling, I've got an awful headache. I. feel funny. >> And Arthur would have to turn up the. oxygen supply a bit more, for it was. quite suddenly 7 days now, the length of. time their air supply would last them, but he had husbanded it. >> Never heard that term. >> I think this is you, buddy. >> They talked less now. A few times art. came upon Fran in the bedroom crying, but she always tried to hide it and. found him a smile on short notice.

That's a great sentence. Toward the end. of their aotted time, as Arthur could. figure it, as the last cylinder hissed. out its oxygen, he wondered whether it. would be better to stay here in the cave. and let the stale air slowly, ever so. slowly sap their strength and their. senses, or whether they should open the. door and go outside into whatever there. was waiting out there. But Fran, to whom. he had not wanted to bring up the. subject, had thought of it too, spoke of. it, and together they decided that the. known capital K was better than the. unknown, capital U. Besides, they'd had.

experience out there, and the memory of. that sudden melancholy and pathological. drowsiness was not all pleasant. They. started on what must be the last day. Arthur announced somewhat weakly, for. there wasn't much air left, that they'd. stretched the oxygen out 5 days more. than he'd figured. "The 12th day,". murmured Fran. It reminded her of. something biblical. Arthur had finished. whatever he had to finish at the. typewriter earlier with nearly the last. of the strength in his fingers. >> [music]. >> The page merely gave the facts of their.

predicament, the supreme fact of which. was that their fresh oxygen had been. gone since early morning. Nobody had. worried about opening a can of food this. [music] day. Instead, they found. themselves arm in- arm in the set by the. window. He gave Fran an affectionate. squeeze and noted with the terrible. sadness that must be [music] controlled. for her sake how pale she looked. He. knew that he likewise must look a. fright. [music] They'd lean their heads. together, their foreheads rested against. the window pane. It was another warm day. from the feel of the thick glass, and. already the temperature of the room.

without its fresh, mechanically cooled. oxygen had risen noticeably. >> It was no day to die, Arthur thought, [music] as men have thought of every day. so marked by destiny. Capital D. [snorts] He looked at the greenness. outside, the sameness. So funny that all. this had happened, that all this could. have happened. He felt very tired. His. breath was shallow and unsatisfying. Fran pressed against him, and he'd. managed to turn his head. She was crying. and he kissed her, their mouths dry, except for where a tear ran down and. touched their lips [music] in union.

>> Sweet. >> This would be at least their way to die. As completely [music] together as two. people could be. Not quite. >> And that had compensation. He was going. to tell her after the kiss how much he. loved her. When her head moved away from. his, her eyes slid from his [music] eyes. to peer out. They widened and a little. gasp came from her mouth. He turned. [music] It was an effort. He looked. where she was looking through the window. into the outside the lawn.

>> Take it away. >> Uh, yeah. Before I do, I should say to. all of the listeners who are used to our. episodes for Halloween and are like, "Wow, this one's going really long. We. don't practice these and we had no idea. how long this one was going to be." So, we're finding out with you. >> I read this in 20 minutes myself, but. uh, you know, it's different. >> Did you speed read it? No, I you know, >> well, I added some time with all of my. jokes and. >> samples, >> quips, and stupid stuff in the first. one. >> Oh, that's right. Let's get on with it. >> Oh, okay. The lifeless stage scenery had.

become alive. For there, hopping. nonchalantly across the grass was a. plump brown rabbit. >> It seemed to eye their window for a. moment as though it knew of the two. people [music] there, and then it. hippity hopped unconcernedly on toward. the terrace. The two overwhelmed people. turned from their window, uttered small, meaningless noises. They made their way. to the door of the cave as best [music]. they could. Fran reached at first, but. they pulled it open and went out. together, arm-in- arm, leaving behind.

the manuscript, neatly clipped and piled. on the typewriter table, memorandum of. the 12 days, that eternity [music]. that had yet been so short. The rest of. the house burst upon their [music]. senses, the familiar furniture, the. bright wallpaper. Fran was sobbing. unashamedly, and Arthur, [music] with a. surge of new strength, helped her. forward. After the stale, nearly airless. atmosphere of the cave, even the hot. stuffiness [music] of out here was. welcome. They made the terrace door, and. their weakness was a joke to be laughed.

at. Now [music] they went out. They. staggered out onto the lawn, and the sod. beneath their feet, hard and dry for. lack of rain, still was a treat for. their [music] footsteps. They had not. walked far when Arthur realized with the. stabbing shock of a knife in the heart. that all was not well. The same feelings. as before. Not the weakness and. suffocation of the cave a few moments. earlier, but the before when they'd been. outside since this terrible thing had. happened. [music] He turned abruptly and.

almost fell, and they reached for each. other for mutual support. He saw that. Fran was so affected, too. They had not. walked far, but it was too far. the. stretch of lawn [music] to the terrace. to the back door was impossible leagues. uphill, dragging weights beyond measure. [music]. They fell together and lay close, panting into one another's face. H there. was simply an overwhelming [music]. desire to sleep, to rest now. Arthur saw. it in Fran's face, and he had not the. heart to hold up her bedtime, nor the.

strength to stay sleeping himself. The grass was home and a mattress, and. as his head came down to it, the. greenness unfolded [music] and engulfed. him. The rabbit, meantime, hopped, unconcerned, around the corner of the. house, and perhaps wondered at the. strange antics of these humans as he. took his plump brown body across the. lawn and into the field beyond. >> All right. Uh, this is about to get. Scooby-Doo. >> It is. But also, I just want to say um I.

triumphantly finished Arthur's parts. >> Well done. >> Bravo. Bravo. >> The same to you, my friend. You did a. great Sin, a great um Fran, a great Mr. Hoskins. All of them. Bam. >> Appreciate it. Nice work. Uh all right, I'll take this part and then you can. take it home at the next. Here we go. The conclusion of the beep drows. The Institute of Hieroglyphics had made. an intensive study of all such data,

particularly with an eye to evaluating. and discovering new facts concerning. that momentous change in the solar. system whose influences had caused what. came to be known in future eons as the. suspension. capital T capital S. Amazingly enough, one of the clearest records found for in. the beginning it did not seem possible. that this species [music]. could be wiped out universally and so. abruptly was one made by a biped who. confessed ability in existence [music]. was the making of hieroglyphics. It had.

taken much time of course for the. institute and other such institutes to. understand [music] these record symbols. of another age. But this biped whose. name was a Hajes, this [music] is art. with his companion biped F. Hajes, good. old Fran had written of the [music] 12. days, a day being a measure of time. commonly used by biped science. It was. in its way a classic, the sudden, [music] far more sudden than could be. imagined by the most sanguine thinking. of that time, [music] suspension of.

biped civilization. This a hajes had told well of it in his. marks [music] and the institute of. hieroglyphics along with the other. learned of the age were inclined to. accept the details set down as an. accurate picture of what had taken place. at least in [music] the first 12 days of. the suspension from the start of this. event which bifed [music] thinking would. have unquestionably accepted and labeled. a catastrophe to the end of the record. There was interestingly enough no. accurate guesses on the part of the one.

identified as Ahajes as to the real. significance of what was happening. Those who had studied tribal customs. [music] and actions of the biped world. aver that in that far away period the. chief concern of any segment was that. some other faction would make war upon. them. [music]. A word which had vanished from the now. capital N but meant the violent attack. with intent [music] to destroy as much. in the way of living organisms and. material as possible. >> Message. >> Biped Hajes had concerned himself with. markings referring to atom bomb and.

poison [music] gas. It took some time. before present eon scientists could. correctly evaluate precisely what these. terms meant but both were eventually. tied in by semanticist which the tribal. factionalism and the obvious [music]. intent of biped to destroy biped. It was. the most interesting report, this. hieroglyphic of Hajes, for at first it. was quite difficult [music] for these. enlightened of the now capital N to. appreciate fully what had gone on then. capital T. An examination of the.

universe and the earth does not reveal. everything for after all meanings and. [music] values themselves change. >> Oh boy. So this is taking place way into. the future, right? >> Yeah. They found his writings and don't. even know what war is. And interesting. to see what happens here, >> right? For instance, [music]. much of the lore of those misshrouded. dark ages had been handed on from. generation to generation of the. enlightened by what in the vernacular of. the then would have [music] been called.

informers in those unions called. households of the biped age. [music]. Even the use of the word biped must be. qualified, for there are, as any student. knows, bipeds today, [music]. but not uniquely so. Whereas in the then. the biped was supreme and reigned. [music] over all including the other. forms of life that inhabited the planet. whose mores abilities [music] and true. eventual place were neither understood. nor even considered by the biped. Painstakingly [music].

information from that forgotten biped. species was gathered and of the. catastrophe that had removed them from. the rule of the earth. It seemed. apparent now that some cosmic [music]. force whose mechanization had been set. in motion by the shifting of great. astral bodies [music] had altered not. only the oxygen belt which surrounds. this globe. Sounds very made up but more. subtly altered its ingredients. Of all. living things only the biped [music]. species which then ruled the world had. been unable to adjust to it. Because of.

certain structural peculiarities of the. cortex, [music] the race had been. stupified, made unconscious by the. withdrawal from others atmospheres. [music] of an ingredient necessary for. the retention by the species of. consciousness. [music]. The Hajes report and other hardwin. indications proved this beyond a doubt. and it was accepted by historians. Contrary, of course, to the. hieroglyphics [music] manuscript, there. had been no poison gas as such. There. had been instead a closing of [music].

that conscious and the biped species. went into a state of suspension through. sleep. Though it was in the last. analysis starvation that caused the. wiping out of that civilization. [music]. Later these atmospheric alterations had. writed themselves. >> So people some people fell into a. drought and slept such that they didn't. eat and starve to death in their sleep. >> Pretty gnarly. >> Jeez. Another day of considerable moment. in this present [music] eon had occurred. not too long ago when outr rididers had.

brought from some remote far cave place. a biped who as the last of his species. had survived. It seemed that somewhere. else in the world at the time of the. great suspension two bipeds, one of each. sex, had survived through some quirk of. fate in nature. They had passed on what. was left of their age through children. and children's children and so on and so. forth through the years. But conditions. were now too adverse for them to. multiply [music] and take back the earth. as they would indubitably try to,

present historians surmised, [music] had. they been able. For centuries, this. spark from another age had rekindled. itself with new progeny reared in a cave. [music] high in a ridge of desolate. mountains at the loneliest spot in the. world. Atmospheric conditions in that. spot [music] because of natural. phenomena maintained a vacuum which. allowed the retention of an ozone form. not [music] antagonistic to the biped. But the day of greatest moment was when. the last biped was brought to the. administration building. [music].

Nature semanticists decided had robbed. this one of his last chance to prolong. himself in flesh and [music] blood. image. I don't know what that means but. it sounds bad. >> Yeah. He came then to their. administration halls, a [music] strange. creature on two legs making strange. angry sounds that until the wisest were. summoned could not be interpreted. [music] As the biped stood in front of. their councils, they urged a tablet on. him and a writing device. And this. being, thinking that perhaps his message.

would reach those of his kind somewhere. [music]. someday, made markings feverishly. Then. the biped was led away. Despite his. violence and ravings, orders were given. to care for him well, feed him, and give. attention to his every need. Afterward, wise and aged [music] scholars were. brought to study the tablet. This then. had been a member, the last member of. that race, which had called itself. human. [music] The human had written. angrily and self-chiding that he had. been captured by jackals and wolves and.

brought before a jury composed of a. lynx, a giraffe, two squirrels, a bear, and other creatures. His hieroglyphic. markings had [music] trailed off at the. end, but there were words of obscure. meaning, which the wise men decided. stood for anger markings. So, Chuck, that's the big reveal, eh? >> Yeah, >> we'll talk about it in a second. >> Okay. Despite the best of care, [music] the. biped died not long afterward. Still, according to records of the event,

making loud [music] noises at his. caretakers. In reviewings of the whole. affair at Animal Institute, it was. decided that this fact far more clearly. than any markings or other dead evidence. that had been found illustrated the. basic unfitness of the biped. civilization, [music] which had so. proudly call itself human. It is obvious. was the finding that the shortcomings of. the biped were many. Likewise, it was. inevitable even many centuries before it. happened at the time of the suspension.

that the biped human would vanish. That. animals [music]. is enlightened of the present eon would. inherit the earth. [music]. >> [music]. >> So, uh, sort of Planet of the Apes. >> Yeah, kind [music] of, but with giraffes.

this time and squirrels. >> Yeah. You know, this is a good one. I. will say it's a 15 pager that could have. been nine. >> easily. I mean, the whole like. boondoggle about trying to get the. neighbors to [music] come out seven. times. >> It was a bit much. >> Yeah. But it was still good. And you can. see why Jean [music] Milligan was the. best. >> Yeah, agreed. And uh that's the. spooktacular 2025 [music] style. >> Yeah. Well, and I'm pretty happy with. it, Chuck. >> Yeah, I can't wait to see what uh. [music] Ben and Jerry do with this. thing.

>> Yeah, same here. And to all of you, while we're waiting for Ben and Jerry to. whip this thing into good shape, uh. happy Halloween to you. Enjoy lots of. candy. Look out for razor blades and. apples and all that stuff. And uh we'll. see you back in regular time after. [music] Halloween. [music]. [music].

Stuff you should know is a production of. [music] iHeart Radio. For more podcasts, iHeart Radio, visit the iHeart Radio. app, Apple Podcasts, [music] or wherever. you listen to your favorite shows.