You Won't See This Coming! | Reading Reddit Stories

- Welcome back to "Reddit Stories.". I'm Shayne. And today it's all about the updates. These are stories that have multiple parts, surprising updates. It's gonna be thrilling. We're not gonna know where any of these are heading. Buckle up 'cause there's gonna be a lot of surprises. and twists. Joining me today, Trevor and Courtney, the denim duo. (crew laughs).

Solid. Solid. - Got him. - Got him. - Owned. - Did I hit your crotch? - No, I don't think so. - Hell yeah. (everyone laughs). Okay. Hi. - Hi. - How are you doing? - Good. (Courtney laughs). - I don't know what else- - Don't wanna ask me? - Trevor, how are you doing? - Good. - Nice. (everyone laughs). You guys have both been on "Reddit Stories". where we've had a lot of updates, and the updates are the best part.

Saying "update" is my favorite thing, and I'm gonna get to say it a lot today. - I don't think we've done a "Reddit Stories" together. Have we? - Really? - We did. No, we did. - Oh yeah. - And it was the one where you were getting, it was like the day of, you got the update-. - That's right. - In the afternoon, and you were like-. - Yep. - This just came in an hour ago. - Oh my god. How could I forget? - Yep. So let's hope for some spiciness like that. - Let's go. - Here we go. Our first story. "Am I the asshole for jumping out of the way.

"when my niece and nephew tried to push me into a pool, "resulting in them falling in?". (Trevor laughs). Kind of funny. (everyone laughs). "Happened today.". This is from July of last year. "Happened today. "My folks decided to host a barbecue. "because I guess that's what older people do.". Okay, bro. (Courtney laughs). "I declined because I really don't like my two sisters,

"their husbands, or their kids. "Wife and I are child free. "Mom then pressured the wife. "Long story short, we went. "By the time we arrived, there were about 20 people there. "My sisters and their husbands were already solidly buzzed. "Drunk really. "My mom was spending 100% of her time. "trying to keep the nieces and nephews, ages seven to 11, "more or less under control. "My dad had strategically retreated. "to the whirlpool part of the pool. "with a small cooler of beers. "Wife and I made small talk with miscellaneous people,

"ate food, and had a frozen margarita. "Sisters/brother-in-laws took turns criticizing us. "for being late, not being in our swimsuits, "and screwing up the vibe. "Whatever. Typical suburban summer get-together. "About 45 minutes in, "two of the kids ran at one of the neighbor guests. "who was standing next to the pool and pushed her in. "She was at the pool steps, stumbled in but didn't fall, "so only got half wet. "She was clearly very unhappy about it, "but she didn't make a scene. "Just went over to where the parents were, "grabbed their towels, dried herself off, and left.

"Sisters and brother-in-laws thought it was all great fun. "A bit later I was standing a few feet away from the pool, "chatting away with someone. "I saw three of the kids running full tilt at me. "from the corner of my eye. "Obviously I was next. "Not that it's terribly difficult to outwit young kids, "but I just jumped out of their way at the last second. "All three of them ran straight into the pool at full speed. "Most of the other guests, including my wife and me, "started laughing. "But their moms, who as I mentioned were pretty shit-faced, "absolutely freaked out.

"Apparently two of the kids couldn't swim. "even though they were in swimsuits. "Since I wasn't in swim gear, I stepped back from the pool. "and let other people fish the kids out. "Kids were bawling their heads off like they'd lost a limb. "At that point, all hell broke loose. "The four drunk parents were yelling at everyone in general. "and me in particular for nearly letting their kids drown. "and also because two of the kids. "had been videoing the trick using their parents' iPhones, "which were now at the bottom of the pool.". (Courtney gasps). "One of my brother-in-laws got into the pool.

"to try to retrieve the phones, "but his BMI and blood alcohol content made that impossible. "No one else volunteered to help, "unsurprising given that my sisters were still bitching. "at everyone." - Oof. - "I told my sisters it was their job to watch their kids, "and that if anything had happened to them, "it would've been their responsibility, not mine. "There were some pretty strong words on both sides. "Wife and I left after the other brother-in-laws fell over. "and face planted while yelling at us. "Now they're saying. "I should have let the little kids knock me into the pool. "and have their fun and ruin my phone.

"So am I the asshole? "Side note, Dad of course never got out of the whirlpool.". - Oh my god. - Okay. A lot going on in this. - So much chaos. - Yeah. Holy shit. Okay, I have some initial thoughts. - Yeah. - At the beginning of this story, I kind of hated him. - Yeah. - And I still kind of hate him. for like how he's talking about people. I'm just like, "Okay, dude.". - Yeah. - Like, "Damn, you're kind of just a hater.". - Yeah. - Which is fine.

I guess you're allowed to be a hater. But now hearing about these people, I was like, "I get why you're a hater a little bit.". I can't relate to this at all because when I was a kid, I was terrified of adults. And the thought of just being like, "Yeah, I'm gonna go prank and push an adult into the pool-". - Yeah, it's scary. - I was just like, "I can't do that. "I'm not allowed to do that to adults.". - I just can't believe 'cause growing up, like my neighborhood and my family. had a ton of pool barbecues growing up, and it's like, there needs to be so much supervision.

on the kids at all times. And for like kids who can't swim, pulling pranks like that with parents who are too drunk. to be able to possibly retrieve them if need be. - Yeah. - Like, that's all really intense. and like doesn't sound like their parents. were being very responsible. - No, these parents sound like they suck. a little bit. - [Courtney] Yeah. - He sounds like he's an asshole. but not for what happened in the story. Like, he sounds like he's just kind of like,

yeah, not super fun to be around maybe. - He sounds like bitter. He just sounds bitter maybe. - He sounds like he hates these people, and I'm like, "Okay, I get why you kind of hate these people.". - But yeah, what happened in the story, I don't think he's at fault at all. - No. - If I was in normal clothes, like at a pool party and had like my phone on me. and like some kids came running at me, I would be avoiding them too. - I would push them in and make them fly in there harder. - If your kids are running around the pool. and they can't swim, you as a parent. should probably be doing something about that. - Yeah, I can't tell you how many times growing up.

being told, "No running by the pool!". Like, never in my life. could we have done something like that. And also like we've had a lot of stories on this show. where when something like this goes wrong. and someone else in this situation who's unhappy is like, "Why didn't you just let this shitty thing happen to you? "Like, why didn't you just let yourself be bullied? "Why didn't you let this bad,". and like you said, his phone would've been ruined then too. - Yeah. - Yeah, pretty insane to blame someone else. for your child taking your phone. and running into the pool with it. - [Courtney] Yeah.

- Yeah, it's like, no, that's on the kid. That's fully on the kid. - Yeah, 'cause like, yeah, OP is an adult, but so are the parents. And the parents should have been there handling that. in the first place. - They're teaching their kids it's totally fine. to just completely disrespect people. - Yeah. - I also just like, this is me, this is just how I think future me or in this situation. I'm like, I wouldn't want to get face planting, shit-faced drunk in front of my kids. - No way. - Like, I don't think that's a good thing to do, especially in a situation where you're by a pool. Like, it's also not generally smart.

to get too drunk by a pool like that. Like, it's a dangerous situation. - Yeah. - I've already drowned once. I can't do it again. (everyone laughs). - God. - The verdict was not the asshole. - Yeah. - Some comments here. "If these kids were mine, "we would be packing up and going home. "They don't get to have fun now. "Thank goodness my kids have never done this. "and pool safety has been drilled into their brain.". Someone else said, "Not the asshole. "The parents knew their kids could not swim. "and took them somewhere with deep water. "and were not watching their kids.". Someone else said, "Not the asshole.

"People tried being asses to you. "You avoided them.". OP said, "I realize they're just kids. "and they were just having fun. "The fact that they thought this was okay. "is more of a reflection on their parents than them. "Just wish we hadn't gone. "It's nice to see my folks and their neighbors, "but I really, really don't like my sisters. "or their husbands. "They don't hide their envy of us, "and they're just exhausting to be around.". - Envy of us? - Yeah, I can't relate to that either. 'cause like, you know, I love my family. Like, my family is luckily not like this level. of disrespect.

But that sucks. - I wonder what that envious comment meant. - I wonder if he means envy that they don't have kids. - Ooh. - That's my only thought. - Ooh. - Update. - Uh-uh-oh. - Who could have seen it coming? (crew laughs). - Who would've even have thought of it? - I don't even know what the update can be on this one. 27 days after the original post. "First off, my folks tell me. "that my nieces and nephews are all good swimmers. "and that they use the pool all the time. "The seven-year-old is still a beginner,

"but he loves the water. "My sister just said they couldn't swim, so I'd look bad.". - Whoa. - "To be fair, none of the kids are allowed in the deep end, "which is where they fell in. "It was the two 10-year-olds and the nine-year-old. "who tried to push me into the pool. "After we left, the party ended on a pretty sour note. "My drunk brother-in-law, "who face planted while yelling at me, "had to go to an urgent care place. "and get his face stitched up.". - Oh my god. - "He was too toasted to drive, so Dad took him. "Dad was very not happy about this. "Later that evening, my sister started a group text.

"and said some really nasty crap. "Their husband threw in a few comments as well. "Wife and I blocked the four of them. "My mom called me. "She was pretty upset about what they said. "She and Dad were in the chat, and I don't blame her. "Because of the texts, "my folks insisted my sisters/brother-in-laws. "come over the next day, Sunday, without their kids. "to get some things straight and lay down some ground rules. "Mom's wording. "The result was a contrite if unenthusiastic apology. "from the siblings via my mom's phone. "I'm glad my wife was with me when they called.

"Her hard stares kept me from saying what I wanted to. "I just told them thanks. "and that we felt no need to discuss it further. "Since I thought things were settled, I unblocked them. "That evening I got a text from one of the brother-in-laws. "telling me the phones cost X amount of money. "and they asked when I'd be paying for them. "What the (beep)? "I replied, 'Never.'. "Took a screenshot of his text. "and forwarded it to my folks with a note. "that we were done with this nonsense. "We're going no contact with sisters/spouses. "and not to invite us to any more holidays.

"or get-togethers if they'll be present.". - Dang. - "Then I blocked the sisters and their spouses again. "At that point, the shit really hit the fan. "Dad called them and ripped them a new one. "Among other things, "he told them the grandkids were not welcome. "at his place indefinitely.". - Oh. - Oh my god. - "Since my mom regularly provides free babysitting, "that got them pretty rattled.". - Ooh. - "He also banned them from using the vacation house. "and told them my wife and I actually own it.". - Ooh! - [Shayne] "Not he and Mom.". - Ooh! - "This completely freaked them out. "Both of my sisters/families used the place a lot,

"including having their friends up for weekend getaways. "This was very much outta character for my folks. "They'd clearly had it. "And for reference, I never wanted my sisters. "to know we owned the place. "We bought it for my folks. "They'd always wanted a place in the mountains. "Keeping the ownership quiet was just a way. "to avoid drama with my siblings. "A couple of days later, "my sisters and their husbands came to our place unannounced. "to apologize in person. "We were out to dinner, and they left a note. "One sister also called me at work too. "I sent her to voicemail. "We've decided that being no contact is the best thing.

"for the indefinite future and haven't interacted with them. "for the last three plus weeks. "Personally, I'm done. "They can go pound sand.". - Whoa. Yeah, I mean, holy crap. Okay, so OP and his wife own a cabin. that their parents were kind of saying that they had. That's so interesting. - Yeah. - And now the siblings don't have access. to this cabin anymore. - This cabin. And I understand. Now the envy it seems like maybe this sibling.

has more money. - Yeah, so yeah, talking about envy. - Yeah. Wow. I don't love that they came to apologize. after all that stuff was taken. - Yeah. - [Shayne] It's like these are just-. - No, 'cause they don't realize what they've been losing. Like, they thought that they had, I don't know. I mean, some people when they're just really entitled, they think they have nothing to lose. when they act the way that they want. because they're so entitled. - Yeah. Oof. - This is obviously like the straw. that broke the camel's back. - Yeah. Like, no wonder he was bitter.

- Been going on for years I'm sure. - Like, those first few paragraphs make a lot more sense now. where I'm just like, "Oh, you just despise these people.". - Yeah, like they've been awful for a long time. - And you've tolerated it. Damn. The fact that they kept that cabin a secret. just 'cause they're like, "'Cause we know it'll cause more issues.". Damn. - And I'm happy that the parent, like the parent parents, like sided with OP this whole time. and really tried to like even mediate. and make sure things were kosher.

But like dang, that's wild. - Update number two. - Oh boy. Oh boy. - Okay. Okay. - This is 10 days later or nine days after that post. - Okay. - "Well, it's been an interesting last few days. "I thought the shit had hit the fan before, "but it was more of a fart. "compared to what's happened this week.". (everyone laughs). - [Trevor And Courtney] You thought you were the shit, you're not even the fart. - It turns out I'm Ice Spice. (everyone laughs).

"For this to make sense, "I need to provide some financial context. "My folks haven't ever been good at saving money. "I've been doing their taxes for years, "so I know pretty much everything about them money-wise. "Their house is paid for and they have minimal debt, "but they didn't save much for retirement. "Both of them get social security. "Dad gets a solid pension, and they have a bit of savings, "but there's no treasure chest in the basement. "I bought their current car for them after they retired. "as a retirement present. "so they could have something nice to drive. "It was the first car. "in probably 20 years they didn't lease. "My sisters are convinced the folks are dripping with money.

"and that our parents. "will be leaving the two of them everything. "since I don't need more money, "so they've never cared about saving either. "Turns out my oldest sister and her husband, "they have three kids, "have been living beyond their means for some time. "and are in financial straits. "They've maxed out their credit cards. "and are behind on their car leases. "to the point that one is about to get repossessed. "He's bragged in the past about making X per year, "but it turns out to be about half that. "She confessed all this to Mom on Tuesday. "because they need a loan, "and this was a what-the-(beep) moment for Mom and Dad.

"For the last three years, "instead of staying at the vacation house regularly, "she's actually been renting it out once a month or so. "and pocketing the cash. "We're talking $2,000 plus for a weekend. "and at least $4,000 for a week. "With her being cut off from using the place, "she's had to cancel one group already. "She's now worried they'll lose everything. "My folks aren't in any position to give them a loan. "My other sister was aware of her renting out the place,

"but of course hasn't ever said anything. "I suspect she's done the same thing as well. "because I went up there once. "to drop off an ATV I'd worked on, "and there was a family there. "who claimed to be staying there with my sister/her family. "and that they'd gone to town for something. "At the time, I let it go. "I figured she'd loaned out the house to some friends, "but I've always wondered. "I found all this out through my folks. "who are pretty stressed out about it, Mom more than Dad. "He's mainly just pissed off about it all. "I know Dad feels betrayed, "and I imagine he's embarrassed. "that he's in no position to help his daughter out.

"He did reiterate that as long as it's up to him, "the girls won't be using the vacation home anytime soon. "My folks let me know what's going on. "because they figured my sisters. "would put a full court press on me next, "and they were right. "On Thursday, my sisters came to our place again, "without husbands this time, "and waited outside the door until I got home. "I had to choose between fighting with them in public, "them making a scene if I went in without them, "or letting them in, so I let them in. "I got a bullshit story from the older sister. "with the younger one backing her up regarding why I needed. "to let them use the mountain place again immediately.

"They also said I've been a shitty brother. "and that I needed to step up. "and plan on paying for their kids' college tuition. "since that's what family does.". - Oh my. I'm getting goosebumps of rage. - "I let them push their story, "then called them out based on what my folks had told me. "Things went to shit from there. "There was denial, crying, cursing, yelling, you name it. "I swear my ears are still ringing two days later. "Won't lie, I said, some really mean. "and shitty things to them, but nothing that wasn't true.

"They finally left about an hour. "After that, I took a shower and laid down. "When I got up, my wife was home, and her first words were. "that she'd had to block more phone numbers. "because my sisters were blowing up our phones. "from new ones.". (Courtney groans). "Folks messaged me yesterday asking me to call. "I'm sure my sisters have told them some bullshit version. "of what had happened, but I'm not up to rehashing it yet. "I'm usually a pretty energetic person, "but this drama has me beaten down. "I had just enough energy today to drive up. "to the vacation house and padlock the entrance gate shut.

"I'm the only one with a key. "I'm guessing that will be enough. "to ensure my siblings leave the place alone. "They'd probably die trying to walk 400 yards uphill. "to get to the house.". - Oh my god. - There's only one comment here. I'll read that first. "Get some security cameras and change the locks. "in case your siblings have copies of the key. "They might squat in your vacation home. "Don't let them mooch off of you.". Wow. - Oh my goodness. - They kept getting worse and worse and worse. - Yeah.

- This is like movie level shitty people. (Courtney groans). - Yeah. - I didn't trust this guy at the beginning just. because he said he didn't like barbecues, but after hearing all this, if that's your experience with barbecues. for the last however many years, I'd hate 'em too. - [Courtney] Yeah. - That's right. That's right. The barbecue. He's like, "Barbecues. "I guess that's what adults.". I was like, "Okay, dude, (beep) you.". But damn. - Yeah. - Holy shit. - To come in and try and like repair in some way. to get the cabin back, but it doesn't even sound.

like they were trying to repair anything. They're just like, "This is why it's important. "that we have it back immediately. "Also, you're paying for our children's college tuition.". Like, what? That's crazy talk. - The level of entitlement's awful. And, you know, I can't relate to the idea of like no contact. with family because I'm very lucky. that I don't have to deal with that in my real life, but in this guy's situation I fully understand that. 'cause it's just like, oh, these are the most entitled people I've ever heard of. And their kids are going to be just as entitled.

Like, based on I can only assume, unless like someone else changes their perspective. on things. This family is just kind of (beep). - Yeah. - And they're going to only leech. off of everything around them. - It's so tough because like I have seen people in my life. who have this like really tough exterior and are entitled, but then there can, like there still could be a chance of like breaking down. and coming clean. But these people like are so stubborn,

and I just can't believe, like it's truly just the most like intense entitlement. - They also sound really stupid because... (everyone laughs). - They're also ugly. - Well, they're also committing a crime. by renting out a house that they don't own. - That's not okay. - A lot of money. Sounds like a lot of money that they were making off of it. and it's like, oh, and you're just blowing that money. - Yeah. - Like, it's not like, "Oh, we're in financial straits. "because of like all these circumstances, health reasons.".

Like, no, you're just (beep) being stupid. - Sounds like they use it on alcohol. - Yeah. - No, they're buying new phones to call him. instead of just being like, how about you figure out your situation? - Yeah, like they're valuing their egos over family. and like it's just such a mess. - Wow. All because he dodged outta the way. from his nieces and nephews. - It makes me like sick to think about like a child, like someone one, lying about how much they make. and pretending to make more. and then spending money frivolously. because you think that when your parents die,

you're getting a bunch of money. That makes me sick. - That's insane to me too. - To be like relying on your parents' death. to save you from financial crisis that you put yourself in. - No. - Yeah, that's like alarming lack of empathy vibes. Like, geez. - Oh man. Awful. - No more updates? - That's it. That's where it ends. It sounds just like this relationships are over. That he's probably not gonna talk to his family ever again. And I probably wouldn't either.

- I mean, that's why you have to, like that's why just like being kind. and being willing to make things better. should be the goal for everyone. because these entitled people had no idea all of the things. that they were losing. They're losing the cabin, they're losing their parents' free babysitting, they're losing all this access, all because they needed to keep their ego. up on its pedestal. - It's also what (beep) you over. when you are super manipulative in the way that they were. because when someone's that manipulative and lying.

and selfish, it's impossible to build back trust. 'cause like it's like okay, even if like a couple years they come back and they're like, "We've changed. We're different,". it's just like, "But are you tricking me again? "Like, are you just looking for another way to use me?". - Are you gonna rent me out? - Yeah, exactly. Like, that trust is kind of gone. And it sounds like his sisters don't even like him, so it's like screw it. - It's so sad. - Sad. - Best of luck to ya.

- Okay, next story. This comes from Am I Wrong. It's another-. - Am I wrong? You gonna tell me that I'm wrong? - Am I wrong? (crew laughs). - She came down in a bubble. - She came down in a bubble, dog. Sorry. - Grow up. - Get educated. - Wicked Witch of the East, bro. - Grow up. - Anyways. - Okay. "Am I wrong? "My friend told me she loves me four weeks. "before her marriage.".

Okay. Her marriage. This is a 35-year-old man. - [Trevor] Okay. - "My friend B, who's a 35-year-old woman, "just told me she loves me four weeks before her marriage, "and I am not sure what I'm supposed to do here. "I wanna know if I'm doing the right thing. "To give some context, I lost my wife two years ago. "I have a five-year-old daughter. "I have not dated in the last two years. "because I have major trauma from losing my wife. "I still love her a lot. "and don't think I'm ready to move on. "I invested all my time in my daughter, "who looks exactly like her mother,

"and my work to keep my sanity for the last two years. "I have been friends with B. "since we were in elementary school. "We lived in the same neighborhood growing up. "and were best friends. "She's an awesome person, "and we were inseparable growing up. "The weirdest part. "was that we had completely different personalities. "She was very outgoing and always had a lot of friends. "I'm a big introvert, "and B plus a few friends was all I needed. "B was a serial dater, "and I don't remember any time since middle school. "when she was single. "B and I never dated though. "B and I also went to the same college.

"She never had a stable boyfriend. "but just jumped from one relationship to another. "I, on the other hand, did not date seriously. "until I was in my junior year when I met my wife. "She was a freshman, and we hit it off instantly. "We fell for each other. "and spent all our time with each other. "This strained my relationship with B. "as I would generally hang out with my wife instead of her. "That was the time B and I slowly started drifting apart. "After college, I moved to a different town for my job. "I occasionally messaged her but nothing beyond that. "B attended my wedding,

"and that was the last time I saw her. "We kept in touch, "but mostly by commenting on each other's pictures. "or keeping each other updated on significant life events. "B did reach out to me when my wife passed away, "and we talked on a phone call. "Last year, B and her fiance moved to my city. "I was still grieving, "and both have been amazing support for me and my daughter. "My daughter loves dancing, "and B helped me enroll her in dancing. "and gymnastics classes and sometimes takes her to them. "I also became good friends with her fiance. "who is indeed an incredibly good man.

"My daughter also loves Auntie B, "and B sometimes helps me babysit. "Last week, B came to my house and asked if we could talk. "Her tone sounded serious. "She told me that over the last few months. "she feels like she has started to develop feelings for me. "and is not sure anymore. "if she wants to go ahead with the wedding. "She felt I also had started to developing feelings for her. "I told her that I am not ready for any relationship. "before I can deal with my mental health. "for which I go to a therapist regularly. "She tried to convince me that she loved me,

"we are soulmates, "and she felt that we were meant to be together. "However, I do not have the same feelings for her. "I love her as a friend, but nothing beyond that. "We were both emotional, "but she said she was glad we talked about this. "She left after that. "B called me that night. "and told me not to talk about our conversation to anyone. "I thought a lot about it. "and decided that I would not tell her fiance. "about B and my conversation from last week. "I feel it's their relationship, "and I do not have the right to ruin their moment.

"if B decides to go ahead with the wedding. "However, I feel guilty. "that her fiance does not know anything about this. "and is going into a marriage. "where B might not be fully ready for it. "Can you guys give suggestions. "on what I should do in this case? "Am I wrong for not telling her fiance. "about our conversation?". For context, I was on Reddit this weekend, and I found this story, and I sent it in. - Okay. - Ooh. - I will say buckle up. - Oh God. - Buckle up?

Oh my god. Initial thoughts? - I mean, it seems like he is a very emotionally mature. and stable person, and it seems like she like has some things. that she needs to figure out. And it's just a really tough spot for him to be in, especially like that they're so close. and have been close for so long, but also that he's become close to like her fiance, and they've become like a support system for him. Like, I can imagine that those, like both of them are really important to him, and so he's in a really awkward spot where he's like,

"Well, I could say nothing. "and continue to have both of them in my life. "when I've, you know, been alone, "but also a ton of guilt associated with potentially, "yeah, like not telling the fiance.". - It's super tough. My opinion for her is like, if you're feeling this way four weeks before a wedding. that you're gonna go tell this person like, "We're in love, we're soulmates," don't get married. What are you doing? - Yeah, call off the wedding first if anything. 'cause clearly the first step of that stuff is okay,

you're feeling this way, but you also don't feel that you're meant to be. with the person you're currently with. - Right. - That's so tough. Like, I don't think people realize the position. they're putting someone in when they're like, "I'm gonna get married. "I have feelings for you. "Oh, just kidding. "Don't tell anyone.". - Yeah. - Like, that strains OP's relationship with the fiance. - I wouldn't be able to be friends with her. I'd be like, "Well, now we can't.".

- It would make things so, I would have so much anxiety about that. (Courtney groans). - But it's also so messy to now like communicate it, to get into there. - [Courtney] Yeah. - The comments here. "I would tread carefully. "B has some commitment issues, "and she pops this on you as she's getting ready. "to make the biggest commitment of her life. "She may have true feelings for you. "She may just be scared and thinks she has feelings for you. "Protect your heart.". Someone else said, "Hey dude, my advice is that people are complicated. "and make mistakes, "but overreacting could be a worse mistake.

"From the way you told the story, it seems she was confused. "and made a decision to try and find some clarity. "Honestly, it's much better she did it now. "than after the marriage. "Marriage should be a huge commitment. "We also don't know the other side of the story. "Maybe she was having a rough time with her fiance recently. "Maybe they were going through some very normal things. "about planning a wedding. "That shit is stressful. "Maybe they are dealing with conflicting opinions. "on their move, maybe about having children. "We don't know, "so we can't assume we understand her motives. "Her telling you to keep it to yourself. "could also be interpreted as her coming to a realization.

"that she was wrong and is feeling shame. "about even acting on those feelings. "Sometimes it takes doing something really dumb. "to understand how you feel. "As I said, people make mistakes and maybe this is one. "that she's going to think about late at night and cringe. "We all have those moments. "I recommend continuing to keep it to yourself. "In a perfect world, the fiance would understand. "that she just had a moment of confusion, but in reality, "it might color the way he thinks about her forever. "That isn't fair to him, it isn't fair to her, "and it doesn't cost you anything.".

Lastly, someone said, "Focus on yourself and your daughter. "Bro, stay away from both. "Not your business to get involved in.". - Yeah, I mean, with the longer comment, I don't know if I agree with all of that because like... I have heard of these similar scenarios. where someone wants to vibe check. if someone might feel the same way, and it's like there's a more mature way to go about it. rather than like going to OP and saying,

"I'm convinced we're soulmates. "We're meant to be together.". Instead of being like, "Hey, like before I get married, "I've been having these feelings lately that I'm not sure. "if I'm reading things wrong, but like marriage aside, "like is there something between us?". And maybe getting that cleared away. if you're still considering moving forward. with that marriage, but it doesn't sound like that's what she did at all. It sounds like she was very much ready. to lily pad once again.

Like, not shaming that, but it sounds like she's just continuing her pattern. - Yeah, and I mean, yeah. It's just like four weeks before a wedding. and you're saying like, "I think we're soulmates,". to someone else. That's pretty rough. Yeah. It's tough. I'm biased 'cause I know where this is going. Light trigger warning. Mentions of assault and just a scary situation. Here's the update. This is 27 days later.

Good movie. - 28. - (beep)! - Fool. Fool. - Fool. You missed a day, you idiot. (Courtney laughs). Okay. "A month ago I wrote a post. "regarding my friend Brie telling me that she loved me. "only four weeks before her wedding. "The last month has been crazy, "and my whole world has been been turned upside down.". (Courtney sighs). "Again for context, I lost my wife two years ago. "and we have a five-year-old daughter. "Brie and her fiance Jason, who's like 33, "moved to our town a year ago,

"and we reconnected as friends, "and they have done a lot to cheer me up during this year. "and bring my life to normalcy. "After Brie told me that she loved me, "I told her that I was still not ready to move on. "as I still miss my wife. "She said she understood, "and I did not hear from her or Jason for a few days. "The guilt was killing me. "as I was not sure if I should tell Jason. "about what she told me. "Thanks to everyone who commented on the post. "It helped me think the situation through. "I finally called B after a few days. "and asked her to meet me for lunch. "I talked to her. "and asked her if she was going ahead with her wedding.

"She broke down and told me she was not sure.". (Courtney sighs). "I told her that she should at least talk to Jason. "regarding her feelings and not be dishonest with him. "I also assured her that I would not say anything to Jason, "but I just wanted her to be happy. "She said she understood and left. "That night, I put my daughter to sleep and was watching TV. "Around 9:30 PM I heard a loud knock on my door, "and it was Jason. "I opened the door, and he was in tears. "He started yelling at me.

"and asked me why I had to steal Brie out of all the people. "I tried to calm him down, but he just kept on shouting. "I was trying to get him to sit down. "on the bench on our porch. "I told him my daughter was sleeping upstairs, "but he slowly was getting more and more physical.". - Oh. - "He punched me in the face, "and I was able to push him off. "I told him to get outta my house, "and he sat in his truck and drove away. "I immediately called Brie, "and she was crying and did not sound well on the phone. "She told Jason that she could not marry him. "because she had feelings for me. "I was really scared for her.

"after the physical altercation with Jason. "and told her to gather some clothes. "and get outta the house. "She did that and came to my place. "I just didn't feel she was safe with Jason. "I consoled her for almost two hours. "and was able to get her to sleep.". (Courtney groans). "The next morning we had to call her parents. "and let them know about what had happened. "Brie kept a brave face, "but I could see how much she was hurting. "Her parents asked her to take a few days off. "and immediately come back home, "and she did take a flight in the evening to go home. "Over the next two weeks, the wedding was called off,

"Brie and I were talking every day, "and she was just very exhausted. "She talked to Jason a few times. "and kept on asking her to take more time to think. "However, I think Brie just wanted to get out of it. "and decided to just break it off with Jason. "Currently Brie is staying with us for the last two weeks. "She still has a job here. "and started going back to work last week. "I have talked to Brie in detail about what happened. "Brie told me that Jason and her were dating on and off. "for the last four years. "Jason is not very career oriented,

"and Brie is very good at her job. "She felt he was a nice and reliable person. "but was unsure about him from the start. "She felt that she was not getting any younger, "and hence they decided to get married. "When she heard about my wife passing away, "she just felt really bad. "and wanted to be around me to comfort me. "When she got her big promotion, "which meant she could work in a corporate office, "she immediately chose my city and moved here. "Jason also moved here and got a new job. "She never had any romantic feelings for me back then. "As she started hanging out with my daughter and me,

"she started feeling the bond we shared. "when we were growing up, "except I was the broken one and she was taking care of me. "She said that she realized she was enjoying her time. "with us more than Jason. "She realized she made a mistake with Jason. "and what she wanted was right in front of her. "Hence, she slowly started thinking about me in that way. "and finally told me about it. "She knew her relationship with Jason. "was over the moment she confessed to me. "It's a shitty situation, "but I'm glad that she realized that before getting married. "versus after. "As for Jason, I feel bad for him.

"He's moving back to our hometown, closer to his family. "He's currently in their apartment. "and will move sometime next month. "I know a lot of you would be curious if we were dating. "We are not dating. "I don't think I can date anyone right now. "and neither should Brie. "She is my friend, and I am happy that she's staying with us. "and plans to be here until everything is sorted out. "My daughter loves having Auntie Brie around too, "so that's a bonus. "Plus it's really nice. "to see her slowly getting back to normal. "Thanks again for helping me during my last post. "Cheers.". - Oh no.

- Yeah. Yeah. Fricking wild. - What a mess. - I remember reading it, and before I knew like where it was all heading, it was like, "Yeah, so after her husband punched me. "in the face in my own house, "I told her to come over to my house.". I'm like, "Do you want him to come over. "and murder you both?". And I'm like, "What the (beep) are you thinking?". That's the worst place for her to go in that moment. - But the way he wrote it is like, "She came here.".

He was like, "Get outta the house,". and then she came here so I don't even know-. - Oh. - If he told her to come. - Either, like-. - Regardless. - It's still the worst place for her to go. Like, she showed up, and he maybe should have been like, "Is there a friend you can stay with? "Like, is there anywhere you can go? "'Cause like he clearly knows where I live. "He's shown up here and been physical here tonight. "Like, if he comes home and you're gone, "and then he comes back here and you're here...". I don't know. - Wow.

- I'm just like, and then like her staying there. for weeks after, I'm just like, "Dude, what are you doing?". Like, I just am like, this is not good for either of you emotionally. - Yeah. - Is my like... - I just can't help but feel like he's stated. that he's not ready to date anyone. He told her that, "I'm not ready to date anyone.". And then said in the post. that he's not necessarily like feeling that with her. But anything like that, like putting myself in her shoes,

I would view going to his place, him allowing her in, her staying there as steps toward what I want. - Yeah. I can't help but... I can't say if it's like conscious like moves. that she's making. It might all be subconscious. 'cause she's going through a lot. - It's tough because like it's very likely. there genuinely was nowhere else to go on short notice, especially if it was like in the middle of the night, and like so that night maybe.

Still scary if the fiance did decide. to just continue to be pissed. So unsafe, especially with a child at that house. But like after that night, like find some other situation. It feels a little inappropriate at that point. And I also think like when you have a kid, you have to be very intentional and careful. with who you're deciding to like be part of your family. And Auntie B is one thing, but Auntie B doesn't want to be Auntie B.

It sounds like, you know? - No, she doesn't. She's admitted. Her intention is she wants to be in a relationship with you. and be the mother to-. - She wants to be Mommy B. - That's what she wants. She has said that. I also think it's a little sketchy that a year prior, and she said she wasn't in love with him, she moved to his city to be near him. And I'm just like, that's huge. - I think it is huge. - That's gigantic. You made that decision for you and your fiance. to move to this city. I'm just like, I think this is a person.

who needs to figure a lot out. And I think that you should not be around her. while she's figuring that out. - Yeah, like she may not have been in love with OP. like that year moving into the city, but like something was deep down pulling her. in that direction. I don't think it was just like, "I wanna be near my friend again,". but then again, like she has the thing with commitment. - I think it's a fantasy in her head. I think she likes the idea of stuff.

- Another rub that I have. is if she's the career oriented one, she's the breadwinner taking them places. and like being the compass of where they go, and he literally punched, the fiance punched someone in the face, like he should have been kicked out. He should have to figure out where to stay that night. and that should have been her place. But I don't know. - I understand. Yeah. And I can't judge too much in that moment. of like scary. - Totally. - It's a whirlwind of crazy stuff. Like, you're gonna make stupid decisions. But it's like now you're making this big conscious decision.

She's here until everything's sorted out. It's like, what's that timeline? - Yeah. - It's messy. Or like stay with a friend, stay anywhere else. It's just like, this is messy. - Yeah. - We have one comment here, but it reflects what a lot of comments were saying. Someone said, "I don't think it's a great idea. "to be playing happy families with a woman. "who has confessed to being in love with you, "especially as you have no intention. "of starting a romantic relationship with her. "I don't think it will end well for either of you.". 900 up votes.

And I agree. He admitted from the start that he is still emotionally. in a crazy place. She is now absolutely in an emotionally crazy place. This is not healthy for the two of them, especially with her attachment to him. It's like, if you're in love with, if you admit to someone, "I'm in love with you, "I think we're soulmates,". and they don't feel the same about you, being around them is not gonna help with that. - No, if that happened to me, I would simply run away. and never stop running until I hit ocean or something.

- Yeah. - What's like the physical like version. of sending someone an invite to play eight ball on iMessage? Like, that's what he should have done. the first time she told him her feelings, just like, "Do you wanna play eight ball?". - What? What? - So you wanna play "Fortnite"? - Yeah. - But one thing I will say is, you know, OP is like writing out this very rational post, being very rational about this in his own way,

but maybe there is part of him that has feelings for her too. and that's why he's allowing-. - Yeah, I don't know. I mean, I don't know. - Who knows? - I think that's the really hard part. about like her moving to the city. and then like becoming very close to him. Like, I think that that also is just like, even like you said, if she's not doing it intentionally, that's a screwed up thing to do to someone. who's like still grieving the loss of their wife. - Yeah, man. - Trying to take care of their child, and then you kind of just are like, "Hey,". and then to yeah, be like,

"Yeah and I love you and you love me and we're soulmates.". - And even if they aren't dating, like she's still kind of like lily padded, like she went from living with one man. to living with another. - And I think if he does have feelings for her, let's say after a moment he's like, "Oh, shit I do,". I still think he needs to be like, "Hey, I think we shouldn't see each other. "or talk for like a while until I feel-". - Yeah, 'cause he can't rationally like figure things out. if she's constantly around.

- And he needs to prioritize his daughter, and it's like, what's gonna be best for her? What's healthiest for her? He needs to make sure she's in a safe, stable situation. - Totally. - And that he's in a safe, stable situation. But what a crazy ride man. - Yeah. - Woof. - Crazy. - I can't believe he just showed up. and started yelling on the porch. - Yeah, man. - Whoa. - [Shayne] Terrifying. - Crazy. - Oh goodness. - All right. This episode of "Reddit Stories" is brought to you. by Rocket Money. Do you know that nearly 75%. of people have subscriptions they've forgotten about?

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- What? - Huh? - I think I've heard of this one. - What? - No way. No way. - "I, a 30-year-old woman, have an identical twin sister, "and for the purposes of anonymity, I'll call her Jess. "Jess and I look so much alike it can be freaky. "At one point when we were still infants, "they had to draw a little dot. "at the bottom of one of our feet. "just so they could keep track of who was who. "for medical reasons. "My mom adored the fact. "that Jess and I were her cute baby twin girls. "and treated us as precious dolls. "who she would frequently dress alike. "and always make us do things together.

"At first, I didn't mind it at all. "because well, it was my normal, "and I do genuinely love my sister. "But when we started getting older. "and I developed my own interests, "I would get so frustrated or upset. "when I either couldn't do something. "because Jess didn't want to. "or the only way that I could do it. "was if Jess could come with me and vice versa. "It sucked because despite our appearances, "Jess was the more extroverted twin. "who liked to go to parties and do sports, "while I was introverted and artistic. "I was always made to do what Jess wanted to do. "because me not wanting to be be so social was seen as bad.

"And the only way that Jess would agree. "to do/endure my hobbies was if I did her homework. "or chores. "When my parents were divorcing, "I was over the moon when my dad agreed. "to let me live with him in another state, "and Jess didn't wanna move away from all her friends. "My mom cried. "when I had to tell her I didn't wanna live with her. "And Jess accused me of hating them. "This really wrecked me emotionally, "and I almost caved, but my dad got me into therapy. "who helped me gather the courage to just leave. "I never really did shake off that guilt. "until around senior year of high school,

"but I never once regretted my choice. "because of how liberating I felt by getting to just be me. "I was slowly able to repair my relationship. "with my mom and Jess. "But Jess and I were never really as close as we used to be, "and I was honestly fine with that. "Fast forward to adulthood, "and Jess is engaged to her boyfriend Steve, who's 36, "and their wedding is set for this spring. "Unfortunately, Jess was recently in a bad accident, "and her face is going to need to get some cosmetic surgery. "She has been crying on and off for days over this. "because there's no way she'll be healed up.

"in time for the wedding. "My mom, Steve, and I have been trying to console her, "but it's not enough. "Earlier this week my mom approached me. "with the idea of dressing up as Jess. "and pretending to be her for the ceremony and reception, "so the pictures will look nice. "I was floored and gave a hesitant 'no'. "because while I do know that this would mean a lot. "to my sister, I just feel really uncomfortable about it. "My mom was upset with me. "and said that it wasn't a big deal, "it was just for the pictures. "and asked me if I really wanted to make it. "so that Jess would have to be reminded of her trauma.

"whenever she had to look at her wedding photos. "or just not have any photos at all. "Am I the asshole?". Quick edit here. "Okay, because I've already seen this in other comments, "I just wanted to be clear about some things. "Jess and Steve's wedding is booked at their dream venue, "and if they postpone, which is in about three weeks, "they won't be able to book it again until around 2025. "And families on both sides are coming in from out of state. "Apparently between the wedding costs. "and needing to save up for the cosmetic surgery, "Steve and Jess don't have the money. "to pay for professional Photoshop. "We live in America, and as far as I know,

"since Jess's surgery is purely for cosmetic purposes, "health insurance may not cover it if any at all. "My mom was the only one. "who actually approached me about this, "so I don't know for sure. "if Jess and Steve know about this idea, "and I'm honestly a little nervous actually talking to them. "about this in case they're on board. "and start to pressure me into agreeing.". Edit number two. "Sorry for not clarifying. "What my mom is proposing that I do. "is that I wear Jess's wedding dress, "and she wears whatever I was going to wear, "and then I just stand in for her.

"when it's time to walk down the aisle, "do the entrance at the reception, first dance, "bouquet toss, and photo time. "I wouldn't actually be doing the vows.". - This is so insane. - Dude, when you started this, I thought it was gonna be like a, "Oh, she asked me if I would like step in. "for a quirky little joke, and I didn't wanna do it,". but this is like-. - Or like, "Oh, she's too nervous.". - Literally. - This is like an A24 horror movie. - Yeah. - I cannot imagine what it must feel like. And it also sounds so tough 'cause I hear so many stories.

about how truly close twins are in the best case scenarios. But like to grow up. not feeling like you can be your own person. And I can't help but feel like the mom clearly favors Jess, saying, you know, since OP is like, you know, "My hobbies and habits were viewed as negative. "because I was more introverted,". and, you know, she was the one who moved out. Like, this mom... I cannot believe this ask.

because like can you just imagine the pictures? - Well, what's insane to me is that what they're proposing. is like, "Well, it's so that the photos all look good.". I'm like, so you want Jess to not participate. in her own wedding? - [Trevor] Yeah. - The memories of it are not as important. as like the day itself. - Yeah. - She's not attending her own wedding. Like, she's not being in her own wedding. That's sad. - She's gonna look at these pictures, she's not gonna be like, "That's me and I look great.". She's gonna be like, "That's my sister marrying my husband.".

- I actually don't remember that. 'cause that wasn't me and I didn't do that. Like, you're only gonna have that opportunity. with this husband to toss the bouquet, to walk down the aisle. Like, those are experiences you want to remember. You're just talking about photos. Like, that's so sad. It also though highlights to me. what I think weddings are to a lot of people, which is just all about the perception, and I'm like, dude, no, it's an experience. That's Jess's day.

That is her day. And like everyone who's there. should not give a shit what she looks like. You know, it's about her. - Yeah. Yeah, 'cause I feel like if that were to happen to me, and it's like, "Dang, I had this accident. "before this big event and I gotta take pictures,". like, honestly, like that becomes part of it. Like, "Oh yeah, remember when we were so young. "and my nose was bent sideways and I could smell my own ear? "That's crazy. "Ha ha. So great that we're better and healthier now.". Like, I don't know. - I'd much rather be telling my grandkids like stories.

about like, "Oh yeah, like you can see. "in these wedding photos like this crazy thing happened. "and I had to get this surgery.". Instead of being like, "Oh yeah, this crazy thing happened, "so that's actually not me in my wedding. "Like, I wasn't even in my own wedding.". - Yeah, it's so sad. - Yeah. - I feel bad for her. That sucks to have something like that happen. before your wedding. It sucks to have it happen in general. But like everyone who's at your wedding should not care. - Yeah. - Yeah. And you're right, like when it comes across as like, yeah, this is about the pictures,

this is about how it's perceived, not so much like, but I'm very curious if Jess is even aware of-. - Yeah, this update is gonna really be... The verdict was not the asshole obviously. - Yeah, she has every right to feel uncomfortable. - Oh my god. Comments. "So wait, that was all Mom's idea? "Jess was not involved? "Wow. This woman sucks. "Oh, hey honey. "So sorry you got badly hurt, but now you are super ugly, "so I decided you need a body double for your own wedding. "Can't have your ugly mug in any of those pics.

"I understand why OOP wants to not put this. "on Jess's plate right now, but I hope she finds some way. "of letting them know eventually. "That woman is horrible.". Someone replied, "Mom to Jess five years later. "Why do you get sad when you look at your wedding photos? "It's basically you anyways.". - Yeah. Seriously. Talk about Mom viewing them as one collective person. and not as their own people. - Someone said, "I was thinking this, "it's an absolutely unhinged ask from the mom, "not just for OOP, "but it's absolutely brutal towards the sister as well.

"Imagine thinking photos are more important. "than letting your daughter experience the magical moment. "of looking into her husband's eyes. "as she walks down the aisle. "Not to mention this is just 100% confirmation. "that she sees her daughters as completely interchangeable.". 2.6 thousand up votes. - Oh wow. That's a lot of up votes. - But like also imagine the husband in that situation. just being like, "I do," and then they have to kiss. (Courtney screams). - Oh my god! They have to kiss! - Yeah.

- And like the first dance and throwing the bouquet. Like, that's so, okay, I cannot wait for this update! - It's wild. Okay. - No way, no way, no way. - All right, here we go. Oh god. Who do we think suggested it first? - I think it's Mom and only Mom. Okay, I think it's Mom and only Mom, and I think this whole thing. is gonna make the twins close again. - What if it was Steve? - I was about to say what if it's Steve? - No! - Could you imagine? - What if it's Steve? All right, let's see.

Okay, one bet on Mom, two bets on Steve. (Trevor laughs). "Thanks for all your advice and suggestions. "as well as affirmation that I have the right to say no. "Still dealing with residual guilt. "about refusing to do things for my mom. "So I reached out to Steve first about suggesting Photoshop, "and it turns out he and Jess were already considering that. "before deciding to just postpone the wedding. "as Jess is dealing with PTSD from the accident. "and doesn't believe that she's going to be able. "to handle the stress of a wedding in three weeks. "I was so relieved, "and told Steve that I would be more than happy. "to help with getting the word out to people.

"that the wedding wasn't happening right now. "For the sake of peace and Jess's mental health, "I've decided to keep what my mom said about using me. "as a replacement for the wedding photos to myself for now. "Jess is really going through a lot, "and I feel like this would be like rubbing salt. "in the wound.". All right, that's probably-. - Ooh! - Honestly for this story, that's probably the best possible outcome. That Jess and Steve are like, "Oh, we're not gonna have a wedding.". - Yeah. Wow. Okay, so it was Mom. - Mom is just awful. - Yeah. And claiming that they couldn't afford Photoshop or anything.

and saying that nothing else was an option too, like the mom was kind of manipulating. - Yeah, Mom is weird. - Also like what year? This is like probably pretty recent. - This is about a year ago. - Dude, yeah, have you ever heard of Fiverr? There's gotta be crazy kids on Fiverr. that are awesome with Photoshop. Come on. - What comes from a wedding is a lot of like gifts, which-. - She made me eight feet tall. (Shayne and Trevor laugh). - Yeah, but I think people could have given gifts. that includes like money.

if they needed to afford a Photoshopping like that-. - Totally. - You can Photoshop anytime. - Yeah, they're digital. They can sit like forever. until you have enough money to, yeah. - But I also think it's like cool, it's your dream venue, but like it's ultimately about the experience of that day. Postpone it. You just went through something horrible. Postpone it. - If you can, yeah. - Yeah, and it sounds like they've decided like, "We're gonna do that.". Like, she's not gonna enjoy the day. - That's so freaking wacky. - I think she should eventually tell Jess. 'Cause I think it's important for Jess.

to know how shitty her mom is. and how like not on her side she really is. - Yeah, no, this mom is out of "Black Mirror.". - Yeah. Okay. Next story. - I hope we get that update. If you ever find that update, just call me right away. - Okay, I'll just call you, dude. - Like, "You remember Jess?". - It's 2:00 AM. Hey, dude, stop playing "Runescape.". I heard an update. Okay, final story, and I hear this one is a doozy. - Dude, how did I know you were gonna say "doozy.".

When you said, "I know this one's," I was like, "Doozy.". - He's gonna say "doozy.". - 'Cause you guys are the same person. It's just you're him if we stretched him. (Shayne yells). - Hit me with a hammer, like a cartoon hammer. (everyone laughs). ♪ Da da da da da ♪. (everyone laughs). - All right. "Am I the asshole? "Husband accused me of financial infidelity. "Husband, who's 33, and I, 33-year-old woman, "have been married for 10 years, together since college. "Since starting out,

"we have made financial security a priority. "and have been able to achieve that, "albeit with some good luck along the way. "We both have good jobs paying close to $200,000 each.". - Wow. - "Student loans were paid off within a few years. "Both went to state schools with some scholarships, "so didn't have a lot of debt to begin with. "We live in a house I inherited from my grandmother, "no mortgage, and don't have any credit card debt. "We maxed out our 401Ks. "and currently have 18 months of expenses. "in our emergency fund and are still adding to it. "Our cars are both paid off. "and should be good for another five plus years,

"and we don't have any credit card debt.". Okay. - Please, God, please. - Woo! Manifesting that for me. - How did you (beep) this up? (everyone laughs). So everything was actually (beep) perfect, and I decided to blow it up. - Okay. Ready. - "We manage our finances in a hybrid manner. "Joint accounts for bills and savings, "and separate accounts for our fun money. "We each get a pretty generous monthly allotment. "The fun money is strictly for our individual expenses;

"hobbies, clothes, outings, with friends, et cetera. "And not for things like date nights, vacations, "or larger joint purchases like household appliances. "and repairs which come out of our joint account. "In terms of the fun money, "my husband is much more of a spender than I am. "due to expensive hobbies, "in particular golf and collecting sports memorabilia, "and he is also more into designer clothes, which is fine. "It's his fun money. "On the other hand, my hobbies are a lot less expensive; "running, working out, reading, baking. "In general, I'm more introverted,

"and a great time for me is tea with a friend. "at one of our homes with homemade pastries. "I have also been getting back into gaming lately. "after setting it aside for much of the past decade. "while building my career. "After realizing I had more than enough. "in my fun money account, "I decided to overhaul my gaming setup. "and got myself a new PC, desk, and gaming chair. "Total cost of about $5,000.". - Oh yeah. - Slay. - Did she also start playing "Star Citizen"? (Trevor and crew laugh). It's a little joke. - I know.

I heard about it. - I got it. Yeah, you told us. You told us. - You told us like 30 minutes ago. - You told us. - "However, upon hearing about the purchase, "my husband is furious. "He says he had no idea I had saved so much money. "and that I should have consulted him. "before spending $5,000. "I asked what difference it made. "if it was my own accrued fun money and not our joint funds. "And he insisted that my accumulating this amount. "without telling him was a form of financial infidelity. "He says he lost trust in me.

"and doesn't know what else I might be hiding. "He is demanding that I return the items I purchased. "and deposit most of the funds to our joint account.". - Whoa! - "He wants to make a new rule. "that fun money accounts can't accumulate more than $2,000. "and that any excess goes back to the joint account. "A rule that would obviously favor him. "as a person who spends most of his allotment each month. "instead of saving up for anything bigger. "I feel like I'm being punished. "for being more of a day-to-day saver than spender. "It wouldn't occur to me to demand. "to know how much my husband has in his fun money account.

"or to try to micromanage what he spends it on. "I wasn't hiding anything deliberately. "He never asked about it until after I made the purchases. "Still, maybe I should have been more transparent. "about my plans? "So am I the asshole?". The (beep)? I just don't understand like, look, it sounds crazy, but speaking of their situation, they make a collective $400,000 a year. They have like no payments, no nothing. - Maxed out their 401K.

- And he's mad that she's spending five grand. I'm like percentage wise that's like-. - Nothing. - Like yeah, that's crazy. - Also like so should she have bought each part. of her gaming setup like over time? Because this guy likes designer clothes. I'm sure he has like a $600 pair of shoes, $300 shirt, and it's just 'cause he spent over time quicker in that way. rather than her just not spending like that. and then dropping it. It's like the math isn't mathing. - That's a weird system to have.

when they're in the situation that they're in. - So true. - A little bit. And I mean like I can't relate to that. Their situation's crazy. Like, they've got everything going for them. - Yeah, I can't fathom why he would be upset. Literally you have a ton of money, no debt. Like, you get a free house. Like, why would-. - Those are also set purchases that are now like done. Like, you have the setup, you have everything. That's it. That's the $5,000. There's no more that you are spending. - Yeah, she's not marriage embezzling.

Jesus Christ. - Yeah. And that's also her money. - Yes. Like, compare bank statements, and you guys can both track how much you're putting in, but it's like, but you guys already had an agreement. that your money is your money, and if you're both comfortable in your joint account, like let her be her own person. - It's just a dumb system 'cause at the end of the year, yeah, at the end of the year they look, and it's like, "Oh, I spent 20 grand on fun money, "and oh, you spent 7,000 but you spent that $5,000 at once.". It's like, this doesn't make sense. - Yeah. - This is a weird system.

It feels like it's a system that benefits him. and he's trying to control it. - Right. I think he's also like, it might be like something he's insecure about is like, "Whoa, she was able to save all this stuff. "and like I don't have that. "Like, this is a problem because something.". - Yeah. The verdict, not the asshole. Comments. "What the hell is he spending $1,500 a month on? "Does he have horses?". (Courtney laughs). Valid. I mean, like when you get rich, like that's-. - Yeah. - OP says, "No horses but lots of golf. "The golf club membership is $500 a month alone,

"let alone expenditures for equipment.". Someone said, "That's a redonk amount. "to spend monthly on a hobby. "He's being a great big jerk to you. "while he spends like it'll burn a hole in his pocket.". - Yeah. - I mean, I know golf is just (beep) expensive. - Yeah, I mean that's like, like a country club like that makes sense. But equipment costs per month. Like, you have the clubs. - Yeah, you should have it, and that should be set, and then- - Again, the math isn't mathing. - Losing too many balls. in the water. - Interesting. - The math isn't mathing.

- You know what makes me nervous? He's acting with like a lot of fear and like intensity, and it's like, 'cause in my head I'm like, you'd only react that way if you like needed the money, but they don't need the money. But now I'm like, oh no, do they need the money? - Is he projecting? - Someone else said, "Not the asshole. "Financial infidelity my ass. "He is just jealous that you save enough. "for a nice new setup. "He is being absolutely ridiculous. "Do not return it and put it in the joint for him to waste.".

He needs the money in the joint account. - Yeah. - I don't know if he has as much money as she thinks he has. That's my theory right now. - Dude, yeah, they gotta compare statements right now. - Surely there was a comment asking her. what game she's playing. (Courtney laughs). - What games does she plan on streaming? - What games is she playing? She got a $5,000 setup. - What she got on Steam? - What she playing? - All right, got all of this time to play "Minesweeper.". (everyone laughs). All right, update number one.

- Oh. - One. - Boy. - Eight days after the original post. This is condensed a little bit because it was a lot. "My husband finally calmed down enough. "to have a conversation with me. "As many others who provided comments suggested, "it wasn't really about the money, "but a window into larger issues into our relationship. "Essentially, my husband has been feeling. "increasingly unhappy with me for a while, "for the following reasons. "In general, he feels that he's a lot more committed. "to his career development than I am to mine.

"It's true that although we currently have. "about the same income, "the ceiling for his field, finance, is a lot higher. "than the one for mine, tech/software developer. "He's currently in an executive training program, "and I'm decidedly not. "He remarked that since getting back into gaming. "a few months ago, "I have been putting a bit less effort into cooking. "I do nearly all the cooking because I work at home. "and have an easier schedule. "It's true that I have been fixing simpler meals, "things like grilled chicken salads or chili with cornbread, "instead of elaborate meals with fussier foods.

"and several sides. "He also noticed that I haven't been. "doing the elaborate table settings I used to. "with flowers on the table, fancy place mats, et cetera. "Honestly, I didn't realize he noticed or cared about this, "but apparently he does. "Acts of service are one of his main love languages, "so overall he's feeling a little neglected because of this. "He also feels I'm not putting enough effort. "into my appearance, not in terms of weight/body. "I'm a long distance runner and slim. "But in terms of things like clothes, hair, et cetera. "It's true that I've never paid much attention.

"to these things given that I work at home. "In tech, the standard for appearance is extremely low, "and I far exceed that. "I tend to buy simple, practical clothes. "at places like Target and Walmart, don't wear much makeup, "and keep my hair in a simple ponytail. "I do glam up a lot more for date nights. "and other dressy occasions, "but most days he comes home from work. "to find me in a T-shirt and yoga pants with no makeup, "and he wants me to make more of an effort. "The bottom line is that because of all these things, "he's starting to notice other women. "Says...".

(crew laughs). "Says he hasn't cheated. "He's just noticing other people. "because he's regularly disappointed in me. "In particular, given that he works in finance, "there are a good number of very career oriented, "type A women who manage to have fantastic bodies.". (Courtney screams). - Sorry. - "Be effortlessly polished. "and glam, and have more interesting hobbies. "He also says he feels horrible about all this. "because he knows I'm a good person, "that he's being judgemental, "that it's not so much I've changed. "as that it's his own goals and expectations have changed.

"in the past couple years. "The financial infidelity part came into it. "because he feels I'm not really investing in myself. "and our relationship, "thus cheating on our future in a sense.". - Oh my! - "He also says he loves me enough to be honest. "I do believe he isn't trying to be hurtful. "I really had to drag all this out of him. "That he doesn't want us to drift apart further, "that he doesn't want to be angry and resentful. "and he knows he's asking for a lot. "I know that many on this sub. "might say I should just tell him to take a hike.

"and call my lawyer. "But we've been married for 10 years, "have invested a lot in the relationship, "and I want to see if the marriage can be saved.". - Ooh. Oh my god. That's update number one? That's number one, bro. - Oh my god. I just wanna say it is so insane to me, like, that he's saying, and coming from a gamer, I'm gonna seem biased, but golf is such a time consuming hobby. - Yeah, bro. - It's like I'm going out on a Sunday for eight hours. Like, there's no way. - Yeah, you're putting a tiny ball in a hole?

Well, I'm traveling to multiple planets, slaying monsters, and saving mankind. - Literally. - Yeah. No, golf is like a huge commitment. That is all of it. This sucks. I mean, he kind of went back, he kind of became what so many of the men. in these Reddit stories are. I tell you, man, it always comes down to the cooking. - What in the world? - It always comes down to the cooking, man. It's just like, "Well, you're supposed to do all the cooking.". I don't understand it. And like they all seem the same.

once that gets brought up. - It's wild. I just can't. I also like think it's sad when you hear in a relationship. like that you want your partner to like, I think that there's a level of putting effort. into yourself. I agree with self care and stuff like that. But let your partner be like face bare, chilling. Like, 'cause that's your real person. If you're expecting your person to embellish, then like what is your lens on reality at that point?

- Right. - It's so weird. It's like he's obviously using these small things. as an excuse like because he just wants to be pampered more. and he like... Yeah, if you're not finding your wife attractive, like you wanna cheat and you wanna be pampered. Like, he's literally saying, "Yeah, you're gaming. "and you're not cooking nice enough. "and you're not setting the table nice enough. "and also you're not doing your makeup. "and that's like why I'm upset with you.". Which is just like a completely just shitty thing. to say to someone. - You know what it is with these men. is that it's that they view, it's like,

"Oh, you're not serving me right. "You're not who I want you to be.". They're not worried about their happiness. or the happiness of their relationship. It's like, "Yeah, but you're not good enough now. "Like, I need you to do these things for me.". And it's just such a selfish way of viewing it. - Like, can't people just get comfortable after a while? Like, not like the bad kind of comfortable, but like let people relax and settle into their life. Like, they've both worked so hard to build this life.

And I've heard some stuff on TikTok. about like career driven people. where it's like that is their life force. and that's what they do. They're not working for the weekend. Like, they are gonna work until the day they die. But like she wants to live her life and enjoy her things, and he's spending his money on designer clothes and golf. and to each their own. But like even when he has everything, he's still finding things that he's not satisfied with. - Yeah, it's like you're 33,

you've been married for 10 years, at what point do you get to relax? - [Courtney] Yeah. - And also like he wants her to be Batman. Like, he wants her to be perfect at every step of the way. It's like, we read plenty of stories. where a partner is clearly like, "Okay, something is getting in the way.". They are dropping the ball in some way. They're neglecting themselves and everything. But she is making 200K a year, and he still is like, "Well, what are you doing to get further than that?".

Like, that's a nightmare to live with forever. - It's like so... As a degenerate gamer, I know how bad it can get. And like the fact that she's like, oh, she buys a new gaming setup, but she's also still cooking, still working out regularly. - Still full-time employee, yeah. - Full-time software developer. Like, she's obviously, like it's a healthy hobby for her. to be like, "Yeah, I want to play some games, "so I got a nice computer.". - And we do not have enough women in tech.

Let's be clear. It's great that she's there. - How dare she be content? - Yeah. - Yeah. Literally. Literally. Literally. - Update number two. - Woo. - Okay. - 15 days later. - 15 days. - Love that movie. - Movie's so good. - Rocks. - 15 days later. This is also condensed. - Okay. - "So the more I thought about it, "the more his requests, demands really, "were sitting poorly with me. "I decided to try a little experiment over the weekend. "to see what would happen.

"if I tried to meet some of his demands. "Not because I actually thought they were reasonable, "but because I increasingly had the sense. "that the goalposts would just keep moving. "and that I was playing a losing game. "So Saturday morning I went to the salon for a glow up; "haircut, fresh highlights, mani-pedi. "Then went to the farmer's market to pick up fresh flowers. "for our table and assorted other gourmet ingredients. "Saturday is usually our date night out, "but I suggested we stay in. "so I can make us a special dinner, steakhouse style; "lobster bisque, "bread basket with several types of rolls/savory muffins.

"made from scratch, crab stuffed mushrooms, filet mignon, "au gratin potatoes, "white chocolate mousse topped with raspberries.". You know the shit, Trevor, you probably make that every day. - Yeah, dude. (Courtney laughs). - "I wore a lavender, his favorite color on me, "sheath dress and high heels and fully done hair and makeup. "For all that, I got a lukewarm, 'Thanks, it was tasty,'. "and a kiss on the cheek. "Of course I did all the serving and cleanup. "Afterwards I asked if this was what he had had in mind.

"when he critiqued me before. "He said that it was a start.". (Trevor laughs). "But that I was acting very entitled. "for wanting credit for basic adulting.". - Huh? (Trevor yells). - Bro, he needs to figure out how to do some basic adulting. Like, what kind of childish behavior? Someone made me white chocolate mousse from scratch, I would be kissing their feet. - Yeah, I'd be crying, peeing the floor, apologizing.

(Trevor laughs). - How long? All of that shit probably had to take like all (beep) day. if not multiple days. - Yeah, no, that was an all day. - Yeah, how does she do it? - Oh my god. - [Emily] Get ready for this. - Oh my god. Emily, don't do this to me! (Trevor groans). Okay, but I will say, I love that she did that. I love that route. Would not have thought of it. And I think it was such a slay. - Dude, how hard is lobster bisque to make? - Well, I mean, it's tough. I mean, you gotta make a whole lobster stock, you know?

Like, it's a time consuming thing. - I'm dead. - Holy shit. "He then," okay, so, "He said that it was a start, "but that I was acting very entitled for wanting credit. "for basic adulting.". Basic adulting like lobster bisque. "He then dropped a bomb that he was being so hard on me. "because he had realized lately I had a lot to make up for. "due to my being a low value woman.". - Huh? - Yep. He works in finance.

- Dude, no, you know what happened? You know what happened? (Courtney screams). (everyone laughs). Oh my god. You know what happened is this guy was like a normal dude. and was content and then Andrew Tate. - Yeah. - He saw an Andrew Tate video. on Twitter. - Yeah, dude, he found the wrong podcast, didn't he? Oh no. Okay, okay. - Low value woman. - We're not even done, are we? Okay. - [Trevor] Unreal. - Okay, so, "Make up for my being a low value woman. "I asked what on earth he meant by that,

"and he said it was because I wasn't a virgin when we met.". What? - Oh my god. - I didn't think that my mind could be blown from there, but oh wow. - Oh my god! Huh? - Dude, this guy went to Top G University. This guy went to Hustler University. - All of the crew in this room is just losing it. - Oh my god. I done lost my dang shoe.

That's so crazy. - I look over and see Luke just like this. - Dude, God. - Okay. - God. We're on a rollercoaster. Okay. - "Keep in mind we started dating at 21. "Neither of us claimed to be virgins. "or stated that as an expectation. "Except for very religious people, neither of us is, "I don't think most 21-year-old college students. "are virgins.". Right. Yeah.

Anyways... (everyone laughs). Just kidding. Right? (everyone laughs). "I was upfront with him then. "that I'd had two previous partners. "My high school boyfriend. "We went our separate ways. "when we went to different colleges. "in different parts of the country. "And another boyfriend I'd had my first year of college. "And that's it. "Both committed relationships and nothing casual. "He then went on to say that because of my low value, "I was going to need to be making it up to him. "for the rest of my life, "that I didn't deserve monogamy or equal treatment,

"and that I was lucky that anyone at all wanted to marry me, "and that he's connected with someone from work, "so if I wanted to keep him, I'd better step up.". - Holy shit. - Oh my god. - "I told him it didn't sound like there was anything. "to keep if he no longer loved me. "or even liked or respected me. "Told him to leave, "and he said he would gladly go to his girlfriend's place.". - Oh! - No. - "Anyway, I have taken the week off from work.

"to get my head together, "have an appointment with a lawyer tomorrow, "canceled the marriage counseling appointment. "but got a referral to an individual therapist. "who can do an intake session with me later in the week. "He and the girlfriend apparently are coming this evening. "to get more of his clothes and things, "so I have to brace myself for that.". - Oh my god. - "Also, please be assured, "I do not think I am a low value woman in any way. "I let my husband make me think less of myself. "in some levels for a short time, "but now I truly see it was a him problem.

"Obviously we don't share the same goals and values, "and he has become someone I don't recognize. "I know the divorce won't be fun or easy, "but I will be okay. "Thank you all for helping me see. "that I was being played before I wasted too much more time. "in a marriage that was already over.". - Oh my god. - Damn, dude. - Well, since he admitted to cheating, maybe she can screw him over in the court, you know? - (beep) get him. She's gonna be fine regardless. I mean, that's insane. - I cannot believe that.

- This is what happens when you get a gamer chair. - This is what happens. - This is what happens, you know? - Oh my god. - It really does highlight though that for this mindset, the manosphere type of stuff, and I think it's important for men to realize this. if they're thinking this way, it's like, you know there's no like happiness, the message is that nothing is good enough, and you're just gonna keep on (beep) your life up over.

and over and over. You are going to end up alone. because you will make sure of it. - I also just, it's so clear it's like not, it's so not equal in his mind. 'cause it's like, what does he offer? Like, sure he's got this executive training program, but like she's been a boss bitch this whole time. Was he a virgin when they started? - I don't think he was. "Neither of us claimed to be virgins.". - Men like that, they're like,

"I don't have to do all that stuff because I'm a man. "You have to be all these things for me because I'm a man.". It's like... - Here's the reality. She now has her own life. She's gonna kick that guy out, and now she's got the sickest gaming set up of all time. - And yeah, and it's her grandma's house, so she gets to keep her house. - If you're out there watching, don't play "League of Legends," don't play "Valorant,". don't play "Overwatch.". Play fun games. Don't play competitive multiplayer games.

You're gonna be just fine. (Courtney and crew laugh). - Aw, dude, what if she gets into "Dark Souls"? - That's awesome. - That'd be a game to let your rage out. - I will say, it's funny that. when she started doing like simpler dinners, it sounded like all the stuff you can make in "Sims.". Chili. Chicken salad. - I like how her simpler dinners. are like me like doing something that I think is cool. - Yeah. - 100%. - Oh, you made chili as like a simple dinner. - Yeah, and they've been together, she said she's in their like early mid 30s? - Yeah, she's 33. - She's gonna be fine. - Yeah, she's totally fine.

They had the perfect setup. No, he fumbled the biggest bag. of all time. - He fumbled the bag. - He's a fool. - He is a fool. - Hall of fame idiot. - And he probably sucks at "Fortnite.". - Yeah, probably sucks. - Yeah. - Zero vic roys. - Wow. That is insane. - No skins. Broke. - All of these updates were mind blowing to me. Is there any in particular that really threw you off? - I don't know. They're all pretty mid, pretty mellow. I didn't really react much.

- Yeah. - [Shayne] Yeah. - Yeah, kind of all very expected. - You did kill our sound guy. - Sorry, Scott. Sorry, Dina. That last one really threw me, and it's very similar to the barbecue one. where it's like there's this tiny little catalyst. that just blows open this whole thing. And honestly buying that gaming setup. was the best thing she ever did for so many reasons. And I hope she downloads all kinds of good stuff. - You know what's also crazy.

is this is like the third to fifth story we've read. about someone being in a relationship. and suddenly he (beep) falls. for this internet male bullshit. - Yeah. - Like, suddenly it's just like, "Well, I'm a high value male.". And it's just like, all right, so you're blowing up your life now. - And what's even like so bonkers. is like suddenly he had a problem. with her not being a virgin back when they met. - He definitely, yeah, it was a new thing. - That's on him. - He is definitely like going out like cheating.

for like a long time I think before the gaming setup. - Yeah. And yeah, I think just knowing him and the consistency, like I don't think that's like an actual priority. that he has in his head. And it shouldn't even matter obviously. He showed himself, and like I bet you she's so grateful for that. - Yeah, I think the lesson here. is don't be a huge douchebag. (crew laughs). - Yeah. And don't be entitled. - Yeah. Think of others sometimes. - Think of others sometimes. - Think of how much you can lose.

- [Shayne] Yeah. - Yeah, you might do that, but, you know, a high value male like me, I don't really need to worry about that. - 'Cause you're a virgin. - Thank you guys for being here. (everyone laughs). 'Cause I'm a virgin. - 'Cause I'm a virgin, so I'm high value. - Well, thank you both for being here. This was crazy. - Wow, wow, wee, wa. - Yeah, for real. And thank you for watching. Hope that wasn't too crazy for you. (Courtney sighs). - Literally.

- Tell me what your heart rate got to in the comments. - Yeah, comment down below all the things. that you're feeling and thinking. because we are thinking and feeling so many things too. And let us know what other suggestions, subreddits you want us to cover. There are so many stories with updates. We will be doing this again sometime. Do not worry. And we'll see you next Saturday. Goodbye. - Goodbye, Reddit! - Woo!