The Weirdest AITA Stories | Reading Reddit Stories

- Welcome back to Reddit Stories. I'm Shayne, and today, we've got a bunch of classic. "Am I the Asshole?" posts. It's gonna be a good time, so buckle up. I've got my friends, Amanda and Damien here. - Big fan. - Buckled! (Shayne laughing). - I watch all of these. I love what you guys do here. - Oh, god. - Glad to finally have you here. - I appreciate it. - Yeah, pretty cool. - Thanks for being here. - Hey, thank you, Amanda. - You're so welcome. Now, let's get into our top story. (Shayne laughing). - Assholes, what do they do? (Shayne laughing).

- Out or in? A new study. - And where is mine? - God! - We're starting here. - Great. - Let's just hop into this first one. - Okay. - Okay. - "Am I the for eating too many cucumbers?". Right off the bat, no. I don't think there's any amount that you could eat. - Cut and dry, honestly. - What's happening? Yeah. - All right, moving on. (group chuckling). Alright, let's see here. "This is perhaps the most bizarre. 'Am I the Asshole' post I have ever written, but I'm honestly so confused.

Like I feel like I can't possibly be the asshole, but then sometimes, people are too blind. to see their own flaws, so maybe I really am. For as long as I can remember, I've had this quirk, I guess you could call it, that I never snack on anything other than cucumber. I shouldn't say never, technically, since socially, I'll get ice cream. or eat a few chips at a party. I'm not a picky eater by any means, but my snack of choice has always been cucumbers. I eat pretty healthily anyways, so a lot of fruits and veggies are a part of my diet. Since veggies are lower in calories, I have to eat a lot of them to eat enough.

So I'll usually have some sliced cucumber in my purse. that I munch on throughout the day, and I'll always have a cucumber in my car. that I just eat whole when I'm driving. I go through several cucumbers daily. Although it's not healthy, I've had days where I've felt really depressed. and overwhelmed and have binge-eaten nothing but cucumber. I think I've eaten perhaps 35 on very extreme days. Recently, this quirk has begun to drive my,". this is a 22-year-old woman, "My boyfriend who's 33 of six months insane.

His words, not mine. He says it's highly inappropriate. to carry them everywhere with me. We spent last weekend at his parents' lake house. and I provided my own cucumber to snack on.". (Damian cackling) "One night before bed-". - Sorry. - It's unfortunately. very funny. - Will you guys. be providing the cucumbers, or shall I provide my own? - Nice to meet you. (chewing loudly). - "One night before bed, I was in my room. gnawing on a cucumber when his mother walked in. Under normal circumstances, I never would eat that around others. I'd slice it up.

She was puzzled but chuckled and said, 'My, you do like cucumber!'. My boyfriend later told me that I humiliated him. with my childish and immature eating habits. I told him that his mom caught me in a low moment. He was being ridiculous since he eats. a bag of chips everyday and I don't bat an eye. He told me that chips were a normal snack. and whole cucumbers were deranged. He told me I needed to stop eating cucumbers, and that my behavior was becoming a deal breaker for him. I feel really bothered, but I think cucumbers are a weird hill to die on, and I don't wanna lose my relationship.

So am I the asshole?". Edit here. "I'd just like to add that my boyfriend. has never expressed any issue. with my cucumber habits before now. The incident in question was because around 8:00 PM, I was getting really hungry. and I don't know his family super well, so I didn't wanna go rummaging, ask for a snack, and I didn't wanna bother them. by asking for a cutting board or something. to cut up my cucumber because of, well, mild social anxiety. So I shut myself in the guest room. and figured I'd just snack on a cucumber quickly. I don't usually go hide and eat cucumbers, ha ha!

But then his mom walked in looking for my boyfriend, presumably, and was a little surprised, but seemed amused and not upset or anything. I honestly didn't think it had turned. into such a big deal for him.". - There's something going on more than the cucumber. - How is this the hardest one to one to unpack. that I've ever encountered? (group laughing). - Any ones that involve veggies are always confusing, 'cause there was also the guy who was stealing onions. - Oh, sure. - Yes. - There's that one. - Love that episode. You guys did great work there. (Shayne laughs). - Thanks, man. Thanks for being here. - I appreciate you.

- I don't see an issue. You're allowed to eat cucumbers. - I can't help but feel. like this is bigger than the cucumber. Like I feel like she's using the cucumber as like, like almost like biting her nails. Like she's just like, "Haa!" - Valid. But I would say it's like, if you're gonna have something like that-. - Great. - You're eating cucumbers, I don't think you can eat too many cucumbers. - I think it's like, cool, she's eating a lot of cucumbers. She's dealing with stress with cucumbers.

- And you can eat a lot of cucumbers, 'cause I think they're like, they're one of the foods that have like, almost like negative calories, 'cause it takes more to digest them. than they actually bring in. - It's a lot of water. I think you're right though, I do think there's a social anxiety thing. She brings it up herself. - Yeah. - Just getting the vibe from this person, I get the sense that they maybe. are a little bit socially awkward and that's okay. - Totally. - I think this is the wrong. subreddit for this question. Like she's not an asshole.

We can acknowledge it's a little different. And if it's your favorite thing, you should probably have a partner that's like on board. - Yeah, I'm a little bit like, a deal breaker? - He's 33 and she's 25. - How could you dare? My mom caught you. - Yeah, I do agree that it's like, it does seem to probably be tied. to some sort of like psychological thing, but it's just not harmful. Like it's just not a big deal. Like she probably could benefit. from talking to a therapist and being like, "Where does this come from? Why am I doing this?". - I don't think she's an asshole though.

- No, by no means. I also think it's funny that her 33-year-old. boyfriend is calling her immature. It's like, well, you dated a 22-year-old. and you're upset like- - [Damien] Yeah. - And she's not even, what she's doing isn't immature at all. But he's being controlling and it's like, dude. - She's 22. Like she's trying to deal with a lot of things. and she's hiding in the guest room. and eating her cucumbers. The issue that I have is the cucumbers are in her car. - No, it's weird, don't get it twisted. It's weird as hell.

But she's not an asshole. - No, she's not an asshole. But it's also like, cucumbers? Get it, girl, if that's your thing. - Yeah, Bugs Bunny basically did that all the time. - Yeah, with carrots. - Maybe she's a rabbit. Maybe she's a rabbit. - Maybe she's just like a little rabbit. - She's a rabbit. - Maybe he's dating her 'cause she's 22. 'cause she doesn't have much time left, 'cause 22 is old for a rabbit. - That's true, that's true. - With that said like, look, 11-year age gap, that's nothing to sneeze at. That's a lot. Not saying it hasn't ever worked out before, but inherently, with that kind of age difference,

there is going to be some issue with control. or like the perception of like. the fact that he's like, "You're acting immature!". I mean, that is an asshole thing in and of itself. because he wants to control how she's perceived. - The verdict was "not the asshole.". Some comments. "Not the asshole. Dump your boyfriend and enjoy your cucumbers. Note: I personally find cucumbers disgusting. and it would still never occur to me to care about this.". Someone said, "Hey, cucumber connoisseur. Are we talking about slicing cukes, kirbies, gherkins, English cukes?

There's a big difference between eating. 35 gherkins and 35 English cucumbers. That's almost 41 feet of cucumber on a bad day.". It's true, it's true! - Damn, someone broke it down! - Because there's the small cucumbers. that you use for like pickling, right? - Yes! - Can I tell you something embarrassing? - Please! - Sure. - I think it's sort of embarrassing. So whenever I bought pickles, and I was just like, "Oh, these used to be cucumbers,". I thought they would put giant cucumbers,

and when you pickled 'em, they shrunk down into little guys. I didn't realize like, no, they were already that size. - I've never put that together, to be honest. I've never thought, I knew. I'm like, yes, these used to be cucumbers. I never thought about the size differential. - Wait a second, wait a second, wait a second. You mean, the little, like, little-. - No, the regular pickles are like this big. And cucumbers are like often big. - Oh, no, but there are cucumbers that are this big. - I know. And they use those for pickles. - Uh-oh. Oh no, Shayne, that's embarrassing! (Shayne laughing).

- I'm in solidarity with you. - No, I'm just kidding, it's fine. (Shayne laughing). Let's make it together. Do you wanna take a pickling class? - I've made pickles before. It's super easy and great. - So then you know? - Well, that's how I learned. - You guys tell me how it goes, for sure. - Yeah, we'll let you know. - I will also point out one more thing about hers though. Clearly, she's not the asshole. She starts it off with, "This is the weirdest one I've written.". - I know. - She's very full of self-doubt. If you're constantly writing things, or maybe you're always an asshole?

But like that's the first time it's come up. - She just also seems very self-conscious. - Yes. - Like I think years from now-. - She seems anxious. - Years from now, she's not gonna give a shit about her cucumber obsession. And if a boyfriend like talks shit about it, she's like, get the (beep) outta my house. Lastly, someone said, "But it doesn't seem like he's worried. about her cucumber eating habit. It seems like he's worried about. how her cucumber eating habit reflects on him. And those are two very different things.". And absolutely. I just think it's always a red flag. when someone's like embarrassed. by someone's behavior in front of their parents or family.

It's like, but that's their behavior always. There's a big update here. - A big update? - Oh, shit! - How can there be a big update? - It wasn't cucumbers, it was drugs. "Okay, I didn't expect my first post. to really get any attention. So I'd like to thank you all for taking the time. to read it and give your judgment. To those of you who expressed concern. for my cucumber addiction/that I have an eating disorder, I can assure you I am perfectly healthy. I wouldn't consider myself addicted, nor do I have an ED at all.

I just really enjoy my cucumbers. I can go days without eating them. I don't need my cucumber fix. It's just if I'm going to snack, I'd prefer to eat a cuke. I would consider the amount I snack on cucumbers. proportional to the amount my boyfriend. or any normal person would snack on chips. or other junk food. I just occasionally eat more since they're low in calories. Additionally, I've had a few cucumber binges. I am well aware that those are not healthy, just like binging on junk food isn't healthy. But that's extremely uncommon for me. And for the most part, I eat a well-balanced healthy diet.

However, I will talk to my doctor about it. to ensure that it's not worrying. As for my boyfriend, we ended up calling it quits. I was pretty hurt at first, but I think perhaps his huge reaction to cucumbers. was indeed a red flag for controlling behavior. I think that he was trying to call my bluff, expecting me to give up my cukes for him. So the breakup took him a bit by surprise too. How it went down was that I told him. we needed to have a chat. I told him that it was unacceptable. to tell me what I was allowed to eat. I had that if listening to me chow down on cucumbers.

was what bothered him, as some of you in the comments noted, I would avoid eating them when he was around. Apparently, the very idea of me eating. so many cucumbers was driving him nuts, not the noise. I decided to try and compromise. He's a pretty heavy drinker. and will get drunk pretty often.". All right, man. (laughs). - Ugh. - I snack on 50 bud lights a day and that's fine. "I know that's very bad for his health, and I have expressed that concern in the past. I told him that I'd give up cucumbers. if he gave up alcohol.". Not equivalent.

- What are we? - At all! - What's happening? - That's insane. Queen takes pawn. - "He declined my offer. throughout a few uncreative insults and expletives, and I'm now writing this from my mom's couch. with a cucumber in my hand and a cucumber in my heart. (laughs) "I'm still-". - It's gonna be like, cucumber in my hand, cucumber in my mouth, cucumber in my other hand, typin' with 'em! (group laughing). - "I have an update!". - It takes forever. - "I'm still unclear on why the cucumbers. were such an issue, why I could never eat them again,

why me suggesting he give up alcohol. was such a big deal, among other things. But I guess I'll never know now. Edit: I seem to have forgotten to add this, as it was a common question on the original post. and I'm seeing it in the comments now. No, I did not eat 35 of those mammoth cucumbers. My eating habit's may be odd, but I'm not completely insane. I think on my last cucumber binge, which occurs super rarely, and it was quite a while ago, I had maybe three or four big ones. and the rest were the mini cukes. I do buy a lot of them at the grocery store, but I have a cucumber dealer. who hooks me up with huge batches.".

- Cucumber dealer? Dealer? - No, I'm sorry. - Dude, this is her vice. She has made cucumbers into like the hardest drug on-. - Do you remember the cucumber season of the wire? (group laughing). - Yeah, man. - Sucks. - A lot of people. died that season. - "Just for some added clarification. for those who think my boyfriend. is completely justified in his cucumber hate. and that I'm a lunatic, I agree, sort of. If he had been bothered by the chewing. or concerned about my health, I was ready to talk about it and work something out.

I didn't enter into the discussion for a fight. or with the intention of breaking up. His attempted grasp for control over my food. wasn't even the reason why I broke up with him. But when he started shouting at me and calling me a bitch, which he had never done before, I decided to end things.". - Yeah, that'll do it. - Well, good for you there. - What is he? - Every reveal of that. was so funny. I mean, it's sad. It's funny now that she's broken up with him, but for her to just be like, "Yeah, he drinks all the time. He's drunk like every night and like I'm-". - "He calls me a bitch all the time.". It's like, "Am I the asshole for eating cucumbers alone?".

- Not to pick her apart too much, she does say, "This is the weirdest post I've ever written.". And she said, "I wasn't expecting my first post to blow up.". And then when she says, "Don't worry, I've got a cucumber dealer.". I'm like, I'm hoping this is real. But I'm like, there's so many things where I'm like, you're the most quirky person! - Yeah. - She's quirky. - She's just quirky. She goes to a farmer's market. is what it is. - Yeah, she's got glasses on. - It's a farmer's market, just someone who-. - She's cool and quirky and fun. - His name is Ralph's Kroger. It's the store.

- It just feels like a Netflix. Like that felt like the end of like a Netflix. like love romance. - Yeah. - Like falling in love where it's like, now I'm on my mom's couch with a cucumber in hand. and cucumber in my heart. Update. Update! - It sounds like a Tim Robinson character to me. It's just like, "Yeah, I'm thinking I'm gonna have some cucumbers.". - If you don't like the cukes, you don't get my looks. - Nice. - Nice. - Sorry. - Well, good for her. - Well, this will keep me up at night. Don't know why.

- Thinking about that nonstop. - I will say I was concerned about the chewing. I was like, if it's the chewing, I'd probably-. - She said it wasn't the noise. - Right, which I'm glad. - Which is crazy, 'cause eating a cucumber is so loud. - She's housing those things all stealthy. That's insane. - Well, that one was hilarious. And good for her, she's out of that shit. - Okay, I think we changed some lives today. - Okay, moving on from that. Next story. "Am I the asshole for throwing out my girlfriend's dolls?".

- Ooh. - Oof. - Typically, I would say on the show, anytime you're throwing something out. or deleting something of someone's without their-. - Permission. - Permission. Typically, you're the asshole. - Dolls? - Last time I was here, it was deleting. the Animal Crossing Island and now it's dolls. Can no one have anything fun anymore? - This is a 24-year-old guy with a girlfriend who's 23. "My 23-year-old girlfriend and I have been together. long distance for three years. We just moved in together. I moved across the country for her after finishing college.

I always knew my girlfriend liked creepy shit.". - Okay, judgment number one. - Like cucumbers? (laughs). - "I always knew my girlfriend liked creepy shit, like haunted houses and scary movies. But I didn't realize she liked to collect creepy shit. I had seen her apartment over video calls, but there was one thing she had neglected to show me: a (beep) shelf of creepy-ass dolls. When I was walking through the apartment for the first time, I noticed it in the corner of the living room, and holy shit. I asked her and she said. that she likes thrifting for old, abandoned dolls.

Cleaning them, getting them new clothes, doing their hair, then throwing them on the shelf. Then she started introducing me to them. They all had names, and there were a couple really rough ones. that she said she had since she was a kid or were her mom's, or some were her grandma's. The other four were thrifted. She said the ones she thrifts. and gets into good enough shape, she gives to disadvantaged kids at the daycare she works at. She only keeps the ugly ones. I thought I'd be okay with it. But every morning, I just dreaded looking at them.

They made me so (beep) uncomfortable. I tried buying her squishmallows, thinking maybe she could collect something normal instead. She loved them, but she still is all about the dolls. I then suggested she give them to her kids at daycare. or display them at daycare instead. But she was worried they'd be damaged. or taken home by kids by accident. I think she realized I didn't like them, so she asked if I wanted her to move them into the closet. I said yes and thought that would be it. Well, one of my friends flew out to visit, and when we were hanging out, he dropped a bowl of popcorn.

I asked him to grab the vacuum out of the closet. and he almost shit his pants. The doll's heads all poked out of the box, and their creepy little eyes stared into his soul. Horror movie shit. I was so embarrassed, and my girlfriend was apologetic, but had a bit of a laugh. Honestly, that was the last straw. Those (beep) things wouldn't leave me the (beep) alone. The next day, which is today, is garbage day. So I took the box out. and tossed it while my girlfriend was away. It's gone. My girlfriend came home and I started sweating.

I told my friend we were leaving to get dinner. She's been calling and texting, but I wanna give her time to cool off. My friend is saying I'm a bit of a jerk, but I genuinely feel that I had to do it.". - Dude, to me, this man does not wanna understand his girlfriend. Clearly, whatever man. These dolls mean something to her, just like the cucumber lady. It's like, why don't you understand your girlfriend? Why don't you understand why she wants the dolls? Rather than being like, "No, gotta get rid of them.

I'm justified 'cause I am uncomfortable.". It's like, dude. Yeah, dolls? Okay. Did I sleep with 15 Barbie dolls. on a thing that were like perfectly set? Yes, I did. Was that a little creepy? Maybe. Whatever, man. - Did they move around every night. without me doing that? - Did they go, "Wake up, Amanda!". - Yeah, did they whisper secrets? No. - Yes. - The good news is, I've seen enough horror movies. to know that those things are coming back. So she's fine. (Amanda cackles). - The point is the act. (both laughing).

- They're going like, "You threw us away in the trash!". - "You made a mistake. Don't worry, we don't know." - Oh, my god. - Yeah, I mean, clearly, like look. It's justified to be creeped out by dolls. That's a phobia for some people. But also like, to just make the command decision. to throw away anything of your partner's is nuts. It's also nuts to like, he was like, "We've been long distance for a long time and I moved in. and I had no idea she liked dolls like this.". It's like, "What are you talking about?". - Yeah. Well, clearly, she made- - Three years.

- Three years. - Maybe she didn't, yeah, three years, you never visited. her apartment? - But he said he knew. she loved creepy shit, scary movies, all this stuff. And then he's like, "But she collects it?". It's like, well, yeah. - Yeah, of course. I don't know, I just feel like this guy wants her to be... You just never throw away someone's stuff. without talking to them. - Yeah. - She put them away in a closet for you, man. - Yeah. And like the fix there was like, "Let's get a different bin or a lid to put on it.". And I think it's not even a matter of him.

not understanding his girlfriend. He doesn't understand people, 'cause his whole thing was like, "That's too creepy for me, a 24-year-old man. Could you give it to those preschoolers? Could you bring it. into the preschool class?" - I know. What was that suggestion? - Also, I feel like a lot of these dudes. are embarrassed by their friends or their mom. And it's like, man. I get being early in a relationship, being kind of like embarrassed. by your partner by doing stuff. I do understand that.

But it's also like, okay, are you just gonna like. throw it away so that you never have to see. that side of them? - Yeah, it's this lie he's telling himself. I mean, this is what controlling people. must tell themselves, that it's like, "Oh, but I can change her.". Like him trying to buy her squishmellows, and I'm like, "It's completely polar opposite to her personality. - They're not creepy. - And also, how patronizing too. It's like, I'm gonna hide the medicine. in a little piece of cheese for her. Like, oh, I'm gonna make her get rid of those dolls, but isn't this better? - Yeah. - It's so shitty. - Here's what I wanna know.

I wanna know. I just wanna know from her. I wanna know what the dolls do for her. - I mean, look. I don't understand. I hate dolls. I also don't love like creepy stuff. I'm not like a collector. You're more in line with that. - I love creepy. - Yes, and I do own. three creepy dolls. - You do? - As a creepy stuff collector. Two of 'em are in my car at the moment. - Wait, they ride with you? - Yeah, they're my ride or dies. - He leaves them at home, but they show up in his car. - Yeah, no, that part's not up to me. (Shayne laughing).

- It's not up to me whether they come. to work or not with me, man. - Dolls gonna doll. No, I love doing estate sales and thrifting stuff. I never spend much. I just like to find little random treasures. that are like cheap and I'm like, "Oh, this is cool for me.". And sometimes, creepy stuff is a part of that. And so last time I did it, and I just haven't unloaded them yet, I found like two perfect like porcelain, sort of jester dolls and I love clown stuff. and I'm like, "That's kind of spooky. That's kind of cool. Five bucks?

Hell, yeah.". - You do love clowns. I remember this about you. - I do. There's the clown doll in the attic store too, which I think I already told on this, but-. - You like that stuff? - I don't like clowns, but I love creepy shit. But dolls and mirrors? I do not (beep) with. - 'Cause I got a lot of mirrors, too. - Oh honey, no. All the demons from the underworld. come through the mirrors. - Is that what's going on? - Everybody knows this. - Is that what that is? - Yes, and the dolls! - Okay, but how else are you gonna get. arcane secrets from the nether beyond? - I don't know. I have to figure it out. - But I know a lot of people.

who are into creepy stuff. And it's just like they get an enjoyment out of it, and that's just who they are. And this guy is thinking he can just throw away the dolls. and it's like, but you can't throw away. that part of her personality. Like that's who she is and you have to accept that. - Also, was he out to dinner while he was writing this? He's like, "She's calling me." - I know. What the hell is that? - The friend's like, "Uh." - "I'm gonna give her. some time to cool off.". It's like, you're so condescending. - Yeah. - Dude, what the (beep)? A bunch of comments here. I think we know what the verdict is.

"You're the asshole. Not only did you throw away something. that didn't belong to you, but items that held great sentimental value. to your girlfriend. These aren't dolls that she found down at the Walmart. They belong to her mom and grandma. This is unforgivable." - Yeah! - "She already compromised by putting them in a closet. since you didn't like them. You'd better hope that it wasn't garbage pickup day. and get them back. I hope the dolls are possessed. by evil spirits and haunt you.". OP said, "They're gone for good. I watched and waited for the garbage truck to go by. It just isn't normal to keep ugly dolls. She knows they're ugly, but she keeps them.

because they remind her of her mom. I think maybe she could just put a picture up. or something instead now. But no one would ever take her seriously. when she's got these weird-ass dolls around.". - You mean, you won't take her seriously. Dude! - That comment's almost so intense. that I'm like, is this real? - That's wild to me. - Someone else said, "You're the asshole. Granted, the dolls thing would creep me out too, but you don't throw away someone else's stuff. If you feel so uncomfortable about those dolls, move out and break up with that person. He responded saying, "I don't wanna break up, and even if she dumps me, I still feel like I did the right thing.

I got rid of her only flaw. She'll have an easier time keeping her next boyfriend. because he won't have to deal with this.". - Oh no, this man is insane! - Yeah. - I got rid of her only flaw? - Now she's perfect. - Now I can put her on the shelf. and she can be my little doll. - He's creepier than the dolls. - He literally is the doll maker. - He's the doll maker. - Oh my god, did we just come up with a horror movie? - Yes, cut this whole thing, cut this whole thing up. - Cut it! - Trademark! - Session begins now! - So there's these dolls, he makes them.

(Amanda laughing). - Update. - Oh god. - "I got many messages asking for an update, but I was banned from r/aita, so here it is.". - How are you banned? - Banned? - How do you get banned? - I think that's your answer. - The mods are like, god, you are such an asshole! - [Damien] You suck! - "I went home and my girlfriend asked me. where her dolls were. She'd had a bad day. and assumed that I had moved them somewhere. after they spooked my friend. But she really wanted them. because they're very comforting for her. I sat her down and told her the truth. To be honest, I expected to be yelled at. It would've almost been easier,

but instead she just started sobbing. It reminded me of when her grandma died. I think that's when it sunk in how bad I (beep) up. I slept on the couch with my friend, and today, I swore to do everything I could. to correct my massive (bleep) up. Unfortunately, there's no way. we could possibly get the originals back. They would've ended up compacted. and heading to a massive landfill outside the city. So I texted my girlfriend what kind of dolls they were. Most of them she knew, but one of her grandma's dolls were handmade. So that one obviously I can't replace.

I started scouring the internet looking for antique shops, thrift stores, pawn shops, et cetera. I ordered a couple online. that were the same as the ones she had. and found one similar to one she had at one of the stores. I didn't realize how expensive dolls were. She hasn't broken up with me yet, but I'm now expecting it after what everyone has told me. I'm sleeping on the couch again tonight. and I'm looking to book a flight home. I'm planning on continuing to pay my half of rent. for the year since she doesn't make much money. And I'll be living with my parents. If she asks for money to try replacing all the dolls,

I'll pay it. It's the least I can do. Thank you everyone for your brutal honesty.". Update number two. - Oh God. - "This is the girlfriend. I have killed him.". - "This is the doll, Maria.". - "We talked and she hadn't forgiven me, but wanted to make it work. I made the mistake of showing her this Reddit account. and she ended up changing her mind. She broke up with me, but is letting me stay on the couch. until I'm able to get a transfer. It shouldn't take long since I've been with my job. for a while and only transferred to this city recently.

So I'll be flying back to my hometown early next week. She's going to be trying to find similar dolls. and we agreed that she'd send me the receipt. and I'd send her the money to reimburse her. That's the end of it, I guess.". Wow, so she was still trying to make it work. after all that shit, and he is like, "By the way, here's all this Reddit shit.". And she's like- - He said like, "Yeah, her next boyfriend could deal with this shit.". - Dude, she is amazing. She is amazing. She was vulnerable enough to be like, this is what this means to me. And she still tried to like figure out how to make it work.

Goddamn. I hope those dolls, they just all get in a car. and they go, "Do you know where he lives?". "Yeah, I got his address.". (Amanda humming). - One of those little-. - The wheel is this big. - One of those little red playschool cars, just like tumbling. - And there's a big truck going like, they see a little car. It feels very Toy Story, I guess. - Terrifying. - You know why I pulled you over, right? You can't be driving like that. - Yeah, and they're like, (beep) you! - I think I'm so scared of dolls,

but I think I would be more scared to throw 'em away. because I'm a skeptic, you guys know this. Like I'm not like an avid believer in ghosts or demons, but I also like to hedge my bets. - Yes. - And if I'm like, if there's a one in a trillion chance. those dolls are haunted, I don't wanna piss 'em off. - And they love skeptics. - Mm, I know. - They love (beep) with 'em. - I'm the guy who'd get murdered in a horror movie. So I'm like, I need to- - From the shins up. - I make sure I'm gonna be like nice to them. - He wouldn't be murdered first. - They'd make 'em watch. (group laughing).

- They'd make him watch. - They make him watch. - Exactly. And then he'd be alone and be like, "No, no!". And the dolls would go, "I think he's in here!". And then they'd walk up to him, and he goes, "I believe!". And they'd, "Good." - Slice! - But like nothing happens. And it looks at him like, drip. - And then I'd wake up and I'm like-. - And you're a doll. (Shayne chuckling). Like the fact that he's like, "I'm just gonna transfer back.". I like can't wait for the convo with his boss. where she's gonna be like, did you (beep)? And he's like, "No.". - Yeah, what is he telling his parents?

- I don't know. - Botched it. - I also love that he's like, "Hey, can I show you this Reddit story. where I tell our whole life story on here?". What was he thinking? - Where he talks about fixing her flaws. - Yeah. - And trying to bait her. with squishmallows. - "The next boyfriend. will thank me.". This is perfect. - This guy is dumb as hell. - Yeah. - Moving on. - Moving on. - Time for the girlfriend to take out the trash. - I love the title of this one. I feel like this one's gonna be weird. - Okay. - "Am I the for stealing my cat?". - Yeah, no.

(Shayne cackles). - Sorry, I'll let you continue. - It's a 21-year-old woman. "So I have a beautiful brown cat, Midge. She's still a baby and is 10 months old. I found her outside of my work. when she was about two to three months old. and immediately fell in love with her. We've had the best time together. and her being my first pet since moving out. makes me even happier. My cousin Tanya, who's 15, visits me a lot since we live in the same city. and I enjoy having her. She also really likes cats, but since her father is allergic,

they don't have any at home. She really loves coming over to see Midge. and I'm glad to be able to provide her. with Midge's presence. School recently started. and before I go back to being full-time student, I've been having to work almost 45 hours a week. to afford my lifestyle for the next couple months. Since I was busy, I let her have the responsibility. of taking care of Midge; such as feeding her, cleaning her litter box, et cetera. It was going really well and I didn't have the chance. to take her home since I was going to be at work. I gave her my spare key to lock up. and scheduled an Uber to take her to her house.

When I came home eight hours later, Midge was gone. I called Tanya and she swore Midge was home when she left. But after a couple hours, my brother called asking. when I gave Midge to Tanya. I was confused and he sent me a screenshot. of Tanya kissing Midge on her Instagram story. I knew then she blocked me from being able to see it, and I was shocked she would do this to me as well as lie. I had a spare key to their house. and went right over and took Midge back. when they weren't home. When I got home, Tanya called screaming at me over the phone.

telling me I broke into their house and stole her property. I laughed and asked how Midge was hers. She told me since she took care of her, she deserved her since I wasn't home, and she had to save Midge. Her parents were also pretty upset. since I did go into their home without permission. and told me I didn't deserve Midge, from what Tanya told them. They told me they decided my uncle. will take allergy medication for Midge. and I needed to give her back. Of course I said no. Tanya ended up calling my mom, lying to her that I abused Midge.

My mom called angry, telling me how could I do this to Midge, and if I don't give her to Tanya. and her family, she will disown me. Tanya texted me this weekend. that if I apologize, she might forgive me. Her parents have been texting me all weekend. They'll press charges since I did go into their home. and will take Midge then. I don't know what to do. I love Midge so much and my mom gave my aunt. and uncle permission to go to my apartment and take her. I know this because Tanya texted me this, I'm assuming to scare me. I am. I'm so scared one of these days,

I'm going to come home and Midge is going to be gone again. My brother and dad think I'm an asshole, since I did go into their home without permission. and acted out without trying to solve it maturely. So am I the asshole for stealing my cat? - This is rough. - I just lived like 20 years listening to that story. - That's a really rough situation. - Wait a second, can I get this clear? So Tanya's her friend? - Her cousin. - Her cousin. - Tanya's her cousin that she let-. - 15-year-old cousin who, she was working a bunch, so she let Tanya have the key to her place.

to basically come and cat sit every day. and take care of her cat. This teenager steals her cat, takes it to her place, and says now, "It's my cat!". Blocks her, just sounds like a psycho. and sounds like every-. - She sounds like she's 15. - She's 15, but the parents. and the uncle and aunt are also (beep) psycho. And so that sucks. These are crazy people. - Here's the deal though. Like obviously, I'm furious at the idea. - I know. - I have my cats. I love them so much. If anyone were to ever like, I would lose my mind.

But also, I wanna leave like a sliver of doubt here. for any updates, because that is so many people in this person's life. saying that she's wrong, and that is possible. - I know. - That's possible that everybody else sucks, but I've also known people. who are really, really bad pet owners. - That's tricky. - It's shocking, 'cause I mean, yes, 'cause we're hearing it from her perspective. - [Damien] Right. - For the mom to just immediately believe? - I was gonna say, the mom immediately believed like, how could you do that?

Which means she didn't have any faith in her daughter. - Yeah, and what I will say is like, if I was in this situation, the cat being taken is insane, but this is your cousin, so these are all people that you know very well. I feel like you would call them and be like, "Hey, like she took my cat.". - She broke into their house, which is like-. - And yeah, it's like-. - She had a key. - She had a key. - She had a key, but-. - She didn't have permission, but they gave her a key. - They gave her a key.

Legally, I don't know any of that stuff, but it's like- - That's fine. - She's now in a tough position because she did that. Now, she's in this like messy. situation. - She (beep) herself over. - Whereas if she had called and said, "Hey, you have my cat, you took my cat.". Even if she had the records of texts of saying, "You took my cat,". she could then show that, maybe? I don't know, but it's tough to just jump to that. - I mean, I guess you sort of go tit for tat. in that point because it's like, "Okay, you stole my cat, I stole it back.".

Breaking and entering versus-. - She did technically steal the cat. - Yeah, it's one of those things. where if someone did anything to my pets, I don't know what I would become. - You burned my house to the ground! - Truly, I'm like, if you want, like, and I would never mess with anyone else's pets. because I know I'm like, if you wanna unlock. demon mode out of someone. - Yeah, you would stop at nothing. - Like that's probably the fastest way. to get murdered by a lot of people. Don't mess with their pets. - I will walk backwards out of the underworld.

with both cats in hands. It's completely fine, yeah. - The verdict here was not the asshole, which I think makes sense given from her perspective. - It's all the info we have. - It's all we have, we don't know. - Because yeah, if I'm fitting in. one of my friends into this situation, I'd be like, "Oh yeah, you're not the asshole.". But that's my friends, who are good pet owners. - Yeah. - And so as presented, yes, of course she should steal her back. - But it's valid what you're saying. Someone said, "Not the asshole, change your locks. If they wanna press charges against you.

for retrieving your property, in the eyes of the law, a cat is property, then they'll have to admit. that your cousin stole from you in the first place. I would just block and ignore all of these people.". Someone else said, "If you haven't taken the cat. to the vet or got her chipped, do so now. That way, there's a paper trail as to whose cat that is.". Edit to say, "(beep) everyone calling you an asshole. for using the spare key, you had to retrieve your stolen property. Get your locks changed so they cannot steal her again.". "Not the asshole, and I hope your family will realize. the damage your cousin did to your trust in them.".

Someone said, "People in this thread actually did that? Having a spare key implies permission to use it. You can't retroactively decide that the reason. for using it wasn't good enough.". - That is true. - That feels very valid to me. - They're lucky she used the key. If someone took my cat, I'd Kool-Aid man through the wall. - That was another thought I had though, 'cause you know when you adopt a cat, there's a lot of stuff you have to do. when you get a pet, and it's like I feel like a veterinarian. would be like, "Yes, this is their cat. They're here. They had all this stuff.". There's a little edit here. "I called and left a voicemail to my landlord.

and gave a brief explanation of the situation. I'm upset since I asked for him to change the locks. and he refused. Legally, he was able to refuse. since as a college student, my mom's name is on the lease. and he needed her permission. Of course he called and she refused. I'm scared she's gonna come tomorrow, but I do have a friend I can drop Midge off before work.". Update. - Okay. - Here we go. - 'Cause I was gonna say, the family's very against her. - Yeah, she's wild. "I took a lot of people's advice. and got Midge microchipped yesterday. as well as I had a conversation with my mom.

that we resolved together. My landlord still refused. to change my locks despite all this. This morning, Midge was taken. I called my aunt and uncle. and they just laughed and told me, "Try; we can hire a good lawyer.". I called the police and explained the situation, showing proof I had ownership of Midge. When we went to my relative's house, the police asked for her back, but of course they were refused. What made me even angrier was my cousin inside the house, door open, holding Midge with a shit-eating grin. Even though I had all this evidence,

my relative slammed the door demanding a warrant. Police suggested I press charges. and take it to small claims court. I am, but they couldn't do anything right there. Going home without Midge was so upsetting. I had to pull over 'cause I started crying. I contacted an attorney. and my cousin keeps posting photos. of Midge on her Instagram. I took the situation to the family group chat in anger, and good news, at least everyone hates them now. My grandmother wrote my uncle. and his family off the will, and of course they're calling me, threatening me with Midge,

and they'll make sure I go to jail for all this. I'm fairly confident in myself, but I would be lying if I wasn't more concerned with Midge. I just want my baby back and I've been crying all day.". Goddamn. - There is the possibility. that the other family's just (beep) crazy. That's also a thing. - I mean, they're taking it to the next level. The grandmother's like, "You're out of the will!". It's like, what? I'm not saying because it's just a cat. Trust me, as a pet owner, that is a family member.

But it's also like, I can't tell who's in the wrong here, because it's like the cousin's gonna go this far. to have the cops called on them? - I always say how like I am not good. with stories that have to do with just families. who are evil to each other on a level like this. - That's a thing. - I just didn't experience that. But I'm like, for her to be there with the cat, like, "Yeah, I have your cat!". I'm just like, "You guys couldn't just get your own cat?". Like goddamn. - This is the Helen of Troy of cats. - It just all seems, this all seems so heightened.

that I'm like I need to meet these people. to know what's going on. I never wanna meet. any of those people. - I was like, you sure? - No, I'll meet cucumber lady, but I don't wanna-. - Me too. She just comes here, she's like, "Do you mind?". - Reddit stories with cucumber lady. And she's just eating cucumber. - Sorry, we got a sound issue. Can you (beep) stop? I will say, you know Zelda, my cat, has two microchips because she's so chubby. that the first one migrated and we can't find it. (Shayne laughing).

- It migrated! - Migrated to where? She pooped it out? - If I knew that, we wouldn't need two micro chips. - Oh, no. She's like, "Zelda!". - Like they're just like, just like under each flap and fold. They're like, "Oh yeah, we're not finding it.". And I'm like, "Oh geez, what do I do?". And they're like, "Can you do another?". I'm like, "Another?". - A possibility here is that the aunt and uncle. are like viewing her as a college student. who's also working as being like, you don't have time for a pet.

- But you don't really have a lot of time. when you're a college student. - But I would also argue, I mean, a cat is a pet that you can have. while being on a busy schedule. You still have to pay a lot of attention to it. and take care of it. - So maybe it's the family. - This family could be thinking, "Oh, she doesn't have time for this cat. This cat's being neglected because of her situation.". - Not because she's a bad person, but because she's busy and maybe the family wants-. - But the way that they're going about it.

is (beep) crazy! - Yeah, they're making that call for her. - They could have been like, Hey, could we adopt your cat? Are you so busy? Can we just take it? - It's really hard to know who's the asshole in this story. - It's a weird thing. I mean, I think you're an asshole. for taking someone's property. Like you are. - Consistently. - You can't take. someone's cat. Like you just can't. - Unless you have a really good cause. - Unless it's like, "This cat might die.". Like yes. But if you're just kinda like,

I don't know, this situation's a little weird. - Yeah, it bizarre. - But all this whole thing. is so weird, how easily all these people are swayed. The mom immediately believed, like, "Yes, you're the bad person.". And then it's like, "But we talked, and now my mom's on my side.". I'm like, the (beep) is going on? - I don't know. - What the (beep)? Communication. - Yeah. - Update number two, "I just wanna say Midge is home. Small claims court came around, and my attorney was very confident. and helped me out so much. She was very helpful and knew from the start we would win.

I provided the judge everything. Yes, everything you guys commented as proof I own her. Photos of her as a baby, proof I have paid for all vet bills. since she was a baby, and proof I had Midge chipped. My landlord also helped. Although a lot of people were upset. with him in telling me to move out, he was remorseful that his decision had consequences. I have forgiven him as his apology came. with security footage of my aunt and uncle. going into my apartment and taking Midge. We have been in North Carolina since the case. They have been silent, most likely embarrassed.

To end this on a good note, I wish I could have taken a picture. of Tanya's face when she handed Midge back to me.". That was messy! - Dude, there's some deep-seated family stuff going on here. The cousin, like, I think there's some opposing. with the family. - That's one of those, I mean, like I said, I feel it's not my place. to ever tell people like, "Oh, you shouldn't talk to your family when I'm not-". - I'll say it. - But I'm not in that type of situation.

That's easy for me to say as someone who isn't in, but I'm like that level of vitriol. where like you're stealing shit from each other? I'm like, okay, I understand if you wanna go no contact. - So I think that's why I was so initially. like tempted to be like, yes, there's more to it. Like clearly, there's something with the animal, because the only other possibility is, those three other people are crazy. And then the aunt and the uncle. are also supporting the crazy. And it's like, yep, security footage. of them breaking in altogether? Okay. - No, yeah.

- Sorry. - On principle, all of these things, it's like, yes, there's a clear cut answer to all this, but when you're reading this story out. and our initial reactions, it's like, "The hell am I missing here?" - Is this even about the cat? - Yeah, it feels like when you're reading a book. and it's like, this shit's weird, and you're like, "Okay, clearly, they're foreshadowing. that some weird stuff's about to happen.". That's what I feel when I'm reading this, where I'm like, "Okay, what are you not telling me?". - That's still true, they haven't hit Thanksgiving yet. Some weird stuff is absolutely about to happen.

- Goddamn. If any other updates happen. or if anyone in the comments has more context on that story-. - Poor sweet little Midge is getting kidnapped. left and right. - I hope that cat is okay. That cat's just like, goddamn. - The cat's like, lights up a cigarette. Man, I've been living life, mom. Let me tell you a little story. - Why don't you lay off the catnip a bit, and I'll get you some water? - Nah, man. - Nah, man. Don't tell me what to do.

I'll lead. - I can play piano. (all laughing). - How? - Next story, this is one that I found. - Oh, boy. - I submitted this. I was like, this made me laugh. Let's read this. "Am I the asshole for talking. to a girl in a bikini on a beach?". This is a 37-year-old man. - Yes. - "My wife, who's 35, is making me write this post. She feels my behavior during our vacation. was completely inappropriate, while I think that it was completely acceptable. and she is wrong. She loves this subreddit,

and wants for all of you to weigh in on our debate. and solve this issue for us. We have been married for seven years. and have a three-year-old toddler. A few weeks ago, we went to Miami for a vacation. and had a fun time. On the second day on the beach, we were relaxing on the beach chairs. My son and I were playing on the beach. while my wife was soaking in the sun. I must add here that I love her very much. and she's the most beautiful person. I have ever laid eyes on. - Hear me out! - At one point, my son wanted to build a sandcastle. and I took him to the wet sand near the water.

with all his plastic toys. While he was playing, a lady, mid-30s, walked up to us and told me how cute my son is. I smiled and said thanks. She was looking towards the water constantly. and I think her kids must be in the water. and she was watching them. Now, according to my wife, she was wearing a completely inappropriate. over-the-top bikini that left nothing for imagination. According to me, I did not notice what she was wearing. and had no comments. She was trying to make small talk. and was asking me about my son's name, how old he is, where we are from, et cetera.

I was also polite and had a brief conversation with her. We talked about where we are from, how long we were in Miami, et cetera. Finally, my son had enough. and he wanted to go back. So I said bye and came back. and sat next to my wife. The whole conversation may have lasted. for less than 10 minutes. My wife was not happy with me talking to this lady. She kept on telling me how inappropriate it was. to talk to "that girl in the tiny bikini,". and that she was trying to flirt with me. I told her what we talked about. and it was not even remotely flirty. I told her that this is common,

and when my son is with me in the park or other places, he gets a lot of attention from other moms. and they always come and have a chat. My wife has seen this play out before. and never had a problem with it. My wife thinks that this is different. because that girl was in a very revealing bikini. and I as a married man should know. better than talking to her. We saw that lady a few other times during our stay. and I cut our conversation short. every time she tried to talk to me. My wife cannot let this go. She thinks that I should admit. that it's different to talk to a girl in a social setting.

versus when she's in a bikini on a beach. I feel having small talk with someone is fine, irrespective of their state of dress or undress. So dear Reddit forum, please settle this debate for us. Is my wife correct that I am the asshole. for talking to a girl when she's wearing a bikini? Or is she being unfair to that lady. when she was wearing an appropriate outfit. for the place where she was? Note that my wife will also be reading the replies, so please be nice when telling her how wrong she is.". - This pisses me off. - Go for it. - There's one more paragraph added here.

"Wife here. I think he wrote this post omitting key details. The girl on the beach was clearly flirting. and leaning too close to him. She may not have said it explicitly, but you could see she was interested. She also kept on popping up in the resort restaurant, bar and lobby after this incident. and tried to keep on talking to him throughout the week. It was disrespectful as she did not say a single word. to me the whole time. I'm not saying my husband was flirting with her, but he should have read her body language and shut her down. Plus, there are bikinis and there was her bikini.

Something with her was clearly off.". Amanda, I feel this, go for it. (Shayne laughing). What is this power? - Women get mad when men shame. like women dressing sexy. So women need to stop shaming women. who are wearing what they wanna wear. Like stop shaming women! Okay, she's wearing a tiny bikini. In Spain, they don't wear anything. Like (beep) off! I don't know, this makes me so mad.

It's just like, I think maybe 'cause it's like too close to home. Like as a teenager, when I wear bikinis, like wives would be like, "Don't look at her. She's a scarlet!". And it's like, I'm in a (beep) bikini. I have boobs. Sorry! I apologize in advance. Not my (beep) problem! This makes me so mad. I'm like, why are we so tightly wrapped. around our husbands and wives and partners? They're human beings.

Okay, if she was flirting with him, all right, he's a grown-ass man. Let him (beep) handle it! And why don't you come up and introduce yourself? - Yeah! - This shit bothers me so much. And maybe I'm like the 20% that feels this way, but it's just like, when a woman is like talking to my husband, I'm like, "Great, get it. Like you're human beings. Have a good little flirt, fine.". If there's an issue there, I will step in or he will step in.

It just feels like there's a lack of trust. - I agree with that, for sure. - How much is she, I don't know. - And like the fact that he said she was sunbathing, and I'm like, "Okay, well now, her head pops up. and she's watching him for 10 minutes.". I think the only thing that would ever off. is if his husband never mentioned like, "Oh, I'm here with my wife," or something like that. If he was specifically trying to avoid like, not gonna show you my ring hand and all this, then like, sure, but otherwise-. - If he is being weird, if he is like, he's with his son. The wife is probably sitting there. on the beach like daggers.

It's just like, girl! - I was gonna say like, "What do you want him to do?". She came up to him while his son is building a sandcastle. You can't be just like, "Hey, let's just move it over here.". He is stuck in that location. until the son is done doing his thing. And the lady's just like there. - It just bothers me, she's on the beach. She wants to wear a teeny tiny bikini. - There's a couple aspects. Since I've seen this before, I've thought about this. There's a couple aspects.

One is, I don't think there's any bikini. that's too extreme when you're in Miami. Like you went to Miami, and then you're gonna be like, "This bikini was crazy!". You're in Miami. Like you went to the place. - If she was in Italy, they'd be topless! - And that's in the cold regions. - That's where it's snowing. - Anything goes in Italy! - I really do think it speaks to like, do you trust your partner? 'Cause almost, to a degree, when you trust your partner. and like some person's flirting with them,

it's almost like, yeah, I mean, I get it. - Yeah, isn't he great? - I know nothing's gonna happen because I know my partner. But like that level of like weirdness of like, oh, I hope that attractive lady doesn't talk to him, or else he's gonna leave me. It's like, damn, imagine operating like that. - That's the thing that it boils down to. in relationships in general. It's like, okay, if someone's gonna cheat, they're gonna cheat. And it's not gonna be you being like, "Oh, don't talk to her,". that's gonna make them not do that. - Exactly. - So like why don't we focus. on the stuff that's actually an issue. - Stop blaming the fricking woman.

walking in a bikini on the beach! - And that is the weird thing too, 'cause at first I was like, well, if she is indeed flirting with him, then she's not getting the picture, yada, yada, yada. That's something you could maybe blame. But she's bringing up the bikini a lot. And from the husband's perspective at least, it's like, well, people come up and talk to us all the time. It's never been an issue, but it's an issue when bikini lady does it. - Exactly, and also like, why don't you two. work that out together and be like, if it does become an issue, then it is on him to be like, "You're right, I'll let her know that I'm married.".

But if they're always together, she probably knows you're married. - Yeah. - Yeah. - I don't know. - What I realized thinking about it. was just like, if this lady wasn't attractive, if this wife didn't perceive this woman to be attractive, she wouldn't have a problem with this. - If you gotta grab your husband by the arm. because they're talking to a woman in bikini. on the beach with his son, you guys have bigger issues. - Yeah. - Let the woman in the bikini run into the sunset. - Amen. - (beep) A!

- That's like literally, he's like, "My wife is standing behind me as I type right now.". And she's like, "Do it better.". - She's like, "Wife here!". And it's like, "Okay, babe, I get it. You might've been hurt, but like, that's between you and your husband.". We can't like cage our partners. so they never talk to other people. But that is a very personal opinion with me. I have to make that very clear. Not everyone agrees with me on that. - Thank you for sharing. - I enjoy when my partner. like lives.

- Yeah. The only other aspect of this that I will flag is like, okay, she keeps popping up all these places. and she's only talking to him. and she completely ignores her. And I'm like, yeah, that's a little rude. - Maybe he's having an affair. (all laughing). - Oh yeah, he's for sure cheating. - He keeps saying things like, "So nice to meet you for the first time. here in Miami for the first time.". - But it's like, for me, it's like regardless of all that, it's still just like, "But you trust him. Like he's not gonna do anything, right?". And it sounds like he did cut it-. - Introduce yourself.

- He said, and she agreed, like he did cut it short. like whenever she would show up. - That's why I always keep a flask of holy water on me, 'cause if someone's like flirting and maybe-. - Get away, Satan! (Amanda and Damien chattering). - Then she's wet and then she's like-. - Listening. - Some comments here. - Stop, you're crazy! - The verdict was not the asshole. Some comments, "Even so, he ignored her flirting. So this should empower wife in the end. What was he supposed to do, just tell her to F off? Sounds like not the asshole, but maybe it is one of those situations. where you would need to really be there to judge properly.".

Someone said, "Not the asshole. I've been married 37 years. Your wife should let this go. You were not trying to pick the woman up. You were at the beach. If anything, she should feel good. that someone else thought you might be attractive. If your wife is half as beautiful as you say, then she has had plenty of guys talking to her. regardless of what she's wearing. Again, she should let it go. Otherwise, both of you're going to start monitoring. each other's conversations with the opposite sex. This is a slippery slope.". Someone else said, "I would say, don't go to Miami on vacation. if you don't wanna see women in sexy bikinis.

who may or may not talk to your husband.". Lastly, someone said, "I never knew when I was being flirted with. One day, I was talking with an attractive girl. at a pet store. I guess I was flirting. because we are pleasantly married to each other.". - Wow. - Oh, boy. - If that ain't me! - Oh, boy. - But I also saw another comment that was like, "I'm guessing your wife. is not gonna like this subreddit anymore.". 'Cause I love that she was like, "You need to put this on Am I The Asshole.".

I'm like, dude, okay. Yeah, which also, separate thing, I don't think settling your feuds on Am I the Asshole. is always gonna be great, because what you're gonna get is he wrote the post. and then she had to be like, "Wife here, clarification! My side too. Nobody on the internet's gonna have the full picture. Never. - We don't have the full picture. But I do love what the guy. who's been married for 37 years. What that means is like, if that is true, then what else is true is like,

are you gonna start monitoring everything they do? - So that's the thing, if someone is gonna cheat, they're gonna cheat. The flirting isn't the issue. Do you trust your partner? - Right. - Yeah. - No, I fully agree. - If he's having an affair with bikini woman. who keeps popping up and he says no, okay, well, then that's a different story. - I fully agree with that. And I've, a long time ago, been in situations. where that trust was gone. And it's just like, it's just sucks. It's just awful. And if you really trust your partner,

it's like, you just really need to keep trusting them. And you just both need to keep talking. But allowing that trust. and also showing you have that trust. I think is really, really attractive and great. And it's so comforting to just be like, oh, I don't have to think about this shit. Like if someone comes up and talks to me. and my partner's nearby, I'm like, I'm not worried about what they're gonna think, 'cause they know I'm not gonna do anything. - I don't want to like keep my partner in a place. where it's just him and I forever. Then he doesn't grow, then he doesn't like-. - Sure. - On the entirety of the human population,

that's the gender you would be attracted to, to be able to talk to at all. - Yeah, no. I also think it's a thing in LA in our industry. You can't think that way because just everywhere you go, there's just so many attractive people. If you go to a party with your partner here in LA, attractive people are going to be talking to your partner. - No, but like everyone has their own like style. Everyone's like-. - I also think this guy is like, because from my perspective, I feel I've never been flirted with in my entire life.

And I think I just don't know. how to read it. - I flirt with you. every day, Shayne. - I don't know how to read. - I've seen it. - I seriously flirt with you every day. - I don't know how to read it. So I think this guy's like that where he's just like, "Oh, this lady's just talking to me.". - That is true. I don't think you can read flirting. - I think I would be in the same way. of just like, "Yeah, lady was talking to me. So whatever." - The amount of times. I found out after the fact that someone was interested, I'm just like- - All the time. - Oh. - No, it's awful. - Or, I don't know, I will have situations. where like I'm hanging out with somebody. and then later they're like, "So what do you wanna do?". And I'm like, "Oh, shit.".

And I'm just like, "Oops." - What? - Sorry. - I see it a mile away. A guy's like, "Hey.". And we're like, "Here we go.". Here we go. - Update. Update. An update from the wife. - She's like, mother(bleep). - Well, you just lost your best customer. Who have you been sending money to? - "I am the wife in this situation. My husband and I posted a debate where we were having. for the last week regarding an incident.

that happened during our vacation. Jesus Christ. I got it after the first a hundred responses. that I was wrong. Not everyone on Reddit needs to chime in on this one.". - That's what Reddit is! - Why did you post. on the Am I The Asshole? - You don't just go like, okay, well, I think she said enough. - You guys didn't need to comment. - Not about him. - "I thought this forum would back me up, but I guess I need to take this L like a champion. I am blessed to have a loving and caring husband. and an amazing kid. I'm also used to women flirting with him all the time. It's not just when our son is with him,

but it has happened at his work, bars, weddings, and other places.". - There we go. - "The worst was when. I was giving birth to our son. and the nurse helping with the birth told him. that his hair looks like prince charming. It was 6:00 AM in the morning and he had just woken up, followed by telling him our son is so lucky. that he got his blonde hair and blue eyes. The worst part is he's not very perceptive. when women flirt with him. He thinks that most women go around talking to strangers. and compliment them on their looks, because that is his life experience. When I try to tell him that, he always gets very defensive.

I do trust him with all my heart though. And he is the best husband ever. Some of you asked me what happened from my perspective. I know there is no way for me. to not seem like an when I write this, but this is what I saw. We were all enjoying our time on the beach. My son wanted to run around, and my husband volunteered to watch him and let me relax. I was enjoying the ocean and occasionally watching them. At one point, I saw my husband and son sitting on sand. and a lady talking to them. No problem. She's just a passerby and noticed my toddler. I closed my eyes, and after five minutes, I see again. And now, this lady is sitting next to my husband.

and they're talking. I also noticed she was extremely attractive, and of course, I got a bit insecure, since I have a mom bod now. She is laughing at God knows what my husband said. At this point, I started getting curious. and was waiting for my husband to look towards me. He finally got up after my son was bored. and came running back to me. I asked my husband who the person was, and he said, "Just some mom on the beach having a small talk.". I asked him, "What you guys were talking about?". And he said the same things he wrote here. I told him she was gorgeous, and did he notice what she was wearing?

He looked at her again and said, "Oh yeah, that's pretty bold.". The whole incident rubbed me the wrong way. Then this lady kept on popping up everywhere we went, and we met her every day.". - Staying at the hotel! (both laughing). - "My husband introduced me. to her the first time we saw her, and she just walked right past me. and started talking with him. I then told my husband I was not comfortable. with his new girlfriend. I was teasing him. And my husband then immediately blew her off. next time she showed up. When we came back, I told him about my insecurity.

when I saw him talk to her and she was sitting next to him. He again got defensive. and told me that he was just being polite. This is when I told him. not to talk to gorgeous moms in bikinis. He felt I was attacking him, but I could not help what I felt. and was just communicating it to him. This was the silly debate we were having, and I thought you guys would have my back. Anyways, I'll try to work on my insecurities. and let him talk to moms in bikinis. One PSA is please don't comment on that thread anymore. and tell him how right he is. You guys are feeding the beast.

Last night, he was sending me links to frames on Amazon. because he wanted to print out this thread. and put it on a wall. He says it's his first win against me, and the next time we have a disagreement, he can point to it and tell me about the time. when thousands of people told me I was wrong. - Oh, she's so controlling. - This is not a silly debate. This goes back since the beginning. The fact that you're hanging on. to the nurse calling him prince charming-. - That to me is crazy. - When she gave birth, it's like, I don't understand why that's a negative.

And I get it. Yes, having a child changes you, like mom bod. I can understand. But you have to look inward, lady. That was the clearest thing in the world. Like you have to stop commenting. - So yeah, telling the internet to stop commenting? In what world? - Hey. - I know. - This seems like there's something going on. with you that you have to look at. - Yeah. - This is my first win against her. - No, she's an asshole for going to Reddit.

and posting on Am I The Asshole and being upset. with the responses. - Stop posting. - And telling them to stop. Like she has to delete her account now, because yeah, Reddit's just gonna have her. - AT&T just calls her, like, we can't supply internet anymore. (all laughing). - We heard what you said. - You can't do it. - We heard what you said. - Ugh, you're not allowed to talk. to gorgeous women in bikinis. Also, I can't stand women or men. who was just like, "That person was gorgeous, right?".

It's a test. - Phishing. - It's a freaking test. - And his response was probably. the best that he could have said. It's like, "Do you see her bikini?". He's like, "Oh yeah, it's pretty bold.". Like what else are you gonna say? - I will say there is something to be said for like, he does need to know a few techniques. to put someone in like a sleeper hold. if they try to flirt again. In her perspective, that's what she should've done. - She's like, "Hey, have you-". (Shayne laughing). I just love, oh, she was casually looking. - Yeah. (laughs). - Honey, look over here.

Oh, he can't see me. (Shayne laughing). Uh, he's letting you rest. - He starts to like, "Huh?". No, I'd say about eight inches probably. "What you saying, hun?". I don't get with the big deal. - Goddamn. - Well, she'll probably. be happy that we're telling the story now. - Oh, she doesn't have internet, she's fine. - Alright, it's time for our final story. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Geez. - "Am I the asshole. for letting my boyfriend touch my surrogate bump?

upsetting my sister?". Okay. "Hi, Reddit. So last year, I, a 29-year-old woman, agreed to be a surrogate for my sister, let's call her N, and her husband, both 27. Due to an unfortunate high likelihood. of infertility diagnosis in my sister, they didn't have the funds to hire an actual surrogate. And I am basically the only person. they're actually close with that has a child, a requirement to be a surrogate. Meaning, I was essentially their only option.

I didn't love the idea at first, but after watching them struggle to conceive. for the last two years. and some light insistence from my sister, I said okay. They did agree to pay me some form of compensation, but from Googling it, it seems like it's maybe 30%. of what it would normally cost. Anyway, fast forward to today and I'm seven months along. and all is gone realistically pretty well. My sister has definitely been checking in on me. all the time, but I can't really blame her for that. But the problem occurred a couple days ago. So a couple months ago, I met a guy at a work event. Let's call him C, and we hit it off.

He has a couple of kids of his own, so he doesn't mind anything about my situation, and it's been going really well. Now that we've been together for a couple months, I wanted to introduce him to my sister. so I set up a dinner for the three of us. Originally four, but her husband couldn't make it. My sister picked me up and drove me over. since he was going to meet us there. And as soon as I got in the car, I already felt like she was upset. but didn't think anything of it. We sat down at the restaurant and waited until C arrived. He came over and greeted us, giving me a kiss, and quickly rubbing my belly.

Nothing really out of the ordinary, but I could see my sister's eyes bulge. I was super confused but didn't say anything about it. We went about our night and she played nice-ish, but was pretty quiet, and honestly, it was a pretty awkward meal. When we left and I got back in the car, she just unloaded onto me, saying how weird it was that he kept touching my belly. I asked her what the hell she was talking about. and she said that apparently, he basically had his hands on it the whole night. And also, that it was super weird because it's her baby. I just rolled my eyes and told her,

regardless of it being her baby, it was my body, which just made her even more mad. I don't know, she hasn't talked to me. in the last two days over this. I really don't feel like she has any right. to police physical intimacy between me and my boyfriend. just because it's her baby I'm carrying. Like, look, I'm pregnant and I have a boyfriend. Obviously, he's going to touch my bump. Am I the asshole? Edit: just because I'm seeing this a lot, baby is not biologically mine. It's her and her husband's. I'm a gestational surrogate. Also, maybe I undersold it in my initial description, but he did touch it a lot more than just when he greeted us.

He basically had his hand on it. the whole time while we eating. I didn't really think anything weird about it, but figured I'd clarify. - Now, uh-oh. (laughing). - Oh, this is so messy. Just first off the bat, I think if your sister is going, 'cause I've heard this happen before. Just having a sister be a surrogate, I think you have to really go over.

like some ground rules before. - That's a big undertaking. - The part of like watching their every move, like you gotta go over some ground rules. Other than that, this story's messy. - Oh yeah, super messy. - So many different directions. - What do you think? - I think that I was sort of on board. with like, yeah, this is messy. Could go either way. But like something that's sort of like (ringing). for me is, okay, she met this guy while she was pregnant,

and he keeps rubbing her tummy. Now, I was gonna make the joke of like, "Oh, if she's mad and even doesn't talk to you, you're gonna see her within two months, for sure.". But also like, oh, if you hate touching the belly, like they probably still have sex right now. I don't necessarily have assume, but like it's likely. So if he's met her when she was pregnant. and they're having sex and he's rubbing some tummies a lot, it's worth looking at. - That's a possibility.

That's a possibility. - Wait, what are you saying? - That's the top comment- - Sort of into like-. - That's the top comment. - Oh, he's into pregnant women. - So the top comment here is, "Not the asshole, but I'd keep an eye on the boyfriend. I'm pregnant with my second, and my husband only touches the bump. when I ask him if he wants to feel a kick. Your very new boyfriend, having his hands on the bump. all the time is strange to me, and I'd be worried about a kink. But your sister has no business policing. how you live your life as long as you're medically healthy. and needs to take a step back. and remember what an incredible favor.

you're doing for her and her husband.". - I like that comment. - I see that, I see that. - The boyfriend, when she clarified, I was like, "Ooh.". Uh-oh, but the sister-. - It's a lot. - That's a lot. - And it is her body. It's like surrogacy is a big deal. The sister's being an asshole. I also understand why like that's an emotional, crazy place she's in. - But it's also like-. - She also needs to check herself and be like, "Oh, but that's your body.

You're carrying my baby, but that's your body, and your boyfriend's allowed to like, when you're in a relationship, you're allowed to do what you want there.". - Exactly. - But I think we sort of have. a diverging path here now though, 'cause like I agree that in any other case, the sister telling her about her body, like not great unless they laid it out. in the ground rules beforehand, and that was a breach of that. And I will also say, to clarify, it's not that a pregnant woman cannot be attractive. It's that this guy is really sort of going for the stomach. So if the sister is picking up on that.

and is watching this new boyfriend rub all over the stomach. constantly and then gets in your mind like, "Oh, this might be a kink for him,". that's when I would be like, "What the (bleep)?". And I feel like maybe I would be angry too. - Totally. - But that's then. maybe something you'd wanna discuss with your sister. as opposed to you can't let someone. touch the belly. - But is she protecting. her sister or is she mad about the baby inside of her? - I'm sort of like, I can't possibly, I'll do my best to like put myself in the situation, 'cause obviously, I haven't gone through this, but for me, it'd be more a matter of like,

"Oh, my baby in your body, yes, but my baby is now somehow party. to this creepy man who has a kink about it.". That would feel uncomfortable to me. even if I can't fully define exactly what it is. - But it is her-. - It is her body. - I agree with you. That's why it's messy, because it is her body. It is her decision, but it is their baby. They should have went over some ground rules before that. - Yeah, I'm not saying she's right. I'm saying like- - I don't even know.

- I get why she'd be like- - I don't know who's... I don't know. - Yeah, this is a situation I'm super foreign to. It'd be interesting to have someone here. who's gone through surrogacy to talk about that. - Yeah. - It's a lot. It doesn't sound like, she doesn't quote anything that, what the sister said was, she said, she said, "He basically had his hands on it the whole night, and it was super weird because it's her baby.". - The whole night, they're eating food.

- But I do think that that comment is very valid. And I understand like, if she were to be like, "Hey, I think this is a kink for him. and that feels weird for me.". And I would feel weird too. - That's why I wanna know, was the sister upset. because she was trying to protect her sister. in that situation, or was it more- - It doesn't seem like it. - Control over the baby? - But it also seems. like maybe she doesn't even know why she's upset. Or she is just upset by what she's seeing. - She might just be upset by the whole thing. Maybe it's like seven months in and she's probably like-.

- Yeah. The verdict was not the asshole, which I think is completely fair. - I agree. - I agree. - Because we're going on this possibility. that with this guy-. - She's having a baby for her sister. - It's another one where it's like, if I was there. and you're at dinner with these people and you see it, it's like this could be very different than what we're-. (Damien laughing). This guy could really be like weird. - Spaghetti on the tummy. It's also a thing, yeah. It's also a thing where it's not like. a boyfriend that they've known for a long time.

Like that's kind of part of the family. It's a new boyfriend. So he is a little bit of a stranger. So it's also like, "Oh, this stranger has his hands.". - Yeah. I think at the very least, not the asshole. - He's like, "Tequila shots!". - Woo! - No, I agree, not the asshole. But there's an update. - She had the baby, and it's his. - Oh no. - I'm just kidding. - And the baby ordered tequila shots. You can't drive. - Baby's like, "Huh.". - "It's been over a month since my original post. and was surprised by how much interest the post got,

so I figured I owe you guys an update post. Sister update. On the sister front, all is well. We talked it over very shortly after my post. Some complicated emotions we had to work through, but we are in a good place now. It is too long to get into here, but I can tell you on this front, it was a happy ending. and she's very excited to meet her baby next month. Boyfriend update. This one went a little different.". Yeah, right. (laughing). - How different is it? - There were a lot of people in the comments.

suggesting he had a pregnancy fetish, which previously to my post, I didn't even know existed.". Got a Ken Bone in here, guys. - Oh boy. - "I pondered on it. but wasn't really sold on the idea. And coincidentally, he actually went on a work trip. for about three weeks shortly after. So he didn't really talk until he came back to town, which was about a week and a half ago now. Honestly, when he came back, I'd almost forgotten about that as a possibility. So when I went to see him for the first time. in nearly a month at his apartment. and he instantly lifted up my shirt.

and told me how much bigger I'd gotten, I didn't really think anything of it. He was right, I did actually grow a lot, and it seemed like a normal enough reaction. But looking back on it now, it wasn't even like he hugged me. or greeted me or gave me a kiss. It was just straightaway right to my bump.". - Oh, boy. - "We ended up getting dinner. with one of my friends later that same night. Again, me still in some form. of either denial or just inattention, I guess just like the last time. I didn't really notice his behavior being weird. But when he went home and I went with her to her house,

she had some questions similar to my sister. "Is that not exhausting for you?" she asked me, which I was just confused by. All the belly touching and rubbing. and the comments and the jokes and stuff? She followed up me. "It doesn't seem too irregular to me. People make jokes and comments to me all the time. Even you do.". "Sure, I'll make some every now and then. But in a one-hour dinner, he made so many. Like he described you as his overinflated girlfriend. Something about being ready to pop,

something else about a balloon. And I know there were others I'm forgetting.". Hearing it now from my sister, my friend, and from Reddit, it finally kind of clicked for me that maybe, in fact, everyone else was right. I had her drop me at his place. and I confronted him about it. Not in an aggressive way or anything, but just asked him if it was true. To my surprise, he looked at me in surprise and just said, "Yeah, I thought you knew. Sorry, I thought it was kind of obvious.". We had a long talk about it. I don't really think a fetish is an inherently bad thing. and people like to make them.

more taboo than they need to be. While his behavior was obviously something strange, it was never violent or honestly, and it never even upset me. I told him I would think about whether I wanted. to continue seeing him.". - We got a month. That's it. - She's not gonna be pregnant forever. - "I told him I would think about whether. I wanted to continue seeing him, which he was okay with and gave me space. I haven't really reached out to him yet, but I'm thinking about it, as I did enjoy the time we spent together, even regardless of his inclinations. Anyway, those are the updates.

Hope you enjoyed the happy. and sort of happy ending for both.". So I think that does put a lot of context, 'cause if he was saying, she seems to just have been oblivious, right? That like he's calling her his overinflated girlfriend, all this stuff. I now understand the sister being like, "Hey, that's a little out of pocket.". - I'm really glad that the sisters-. - They're good. - I'm really glad about it. 'cause that's the most important thing.

- Agreed. - But what is he gonna do when she has the baby. and she's not pregnant anymore? - He's gonna be like, "I stole this basketball. Quick, they're coming. Will you hide it for me?". - Look, it's funny that she's like, "Oh, do you have this fetish?". He's like, "Yeah, absolutely.". Now, my only thought, 'cause yes, there's nothing wrong with with fetishes or kinks. amongst consensual adults. However, he knew he was going to dinner. with like the person who's the surrogate, like receiving the surrogacy.

I'm assuming- - I'm assuming. - I'm assuming- - Even like mixed company, like it's someone else's in here-. - It's just like, hey, in that situation, man, maybe just-. - He's loud and proud. with his kinks. - Not here. - But here's the thing with kinks though. - Tell us. - I don't like it. So here's the thing. I don't like it when people are involved in them. before they realize it. Like it's the same thing where like, I'm not going to kink shame, but when you see those like posts where it's like, oh, someone had like a leash on the subway.

Like it's not a matter of like someone doing it. It's like, "Okay, you're involving people.". It's like, "Will you hold the leash?". Like I've heard about that happening at cons. I think you even read that on a Reddit story once. So that really bugs me. And the fact that he was like, "Oh, I thought you knew. It was kind of obvious.". That's possible that that's what he meant. It's also I think a manipulation tactic to be like, "Oh, you're caught.". "Yeah, I thought we were all on the same page. Oh, aren't you chill about it?". - It's clear that- - I thought we were. in an open relationship. - Yeah. It's clear that she didn't know. - Wasn't communicated directly, and so I think that's weird,

and then if the sister's at dinner, like no matter who that is, whether it would've been the person. who's having the baby biologically or not, if someone else's there and you're having a conversation. about like, "Yeah, my basketball girl there.". - She's about to pop. - It made the friend. uncomfortable too. The friend was like, "That was a lot.". - She didn't write that he was bricked up the whole time. - Yeah. (laughs). But I get it, I get it. There's a lot to unpack in that story. I am very curious in the comments down below.

like people's thoughts on it, because that's one that I gotta process. I'm gonna be thinking about that one for the next week. of just all the like levels to it. - Yeah, I definitely don't think she's the asshole. - No. - But I definitely think. she's like in a new world. She's like, "I'm having a baby for my sister.". Pregnancy kink. Like whoa. - It's a lot of things thrown at her. - Yeah. - Damn, those are some crazy ones. - Those are some like weird.

- Those are some mind-boggling ones, yeah. I should clarify for people, we're reading these at 9:30 in the morning. It's like first thing of the day getting this stuff. - Go from cucumber to surrogate. I don't know, man. - From cucumber to surrogate, the Shayne top Reddit stories. - And the dolls, I'll just pop behind it. Now I know how to F with Shayne - dolls. - There's already been a video of it. - Oh, whatever. - Yeah. - I also like how polarizing some of these were,

where like we never flat out disagreed, but there were a couple moments where we were like, "Oh, well, I kinda see it this way. Yeah, kind of.". That's a fun conversation to have. - It's true, I think 'cause with all of these, there's different context. where these would flip back and forth, right? And almost all of these stories are ones where I'm like, if I was there, my opinion might have been different. But I'm taking these at face value. - Right. - Some good stuff. Thank you both for being here. - Oh my God, that was a blast. - This has just been so cool being with you guys. - That was a blast.

Yay. - Pretty sick. - Anytime. Thanks for coming on our show. - Thank you guys for watching. And let us know what other themes, subreddits you want us to see, what it want us to do. And we'll see you next Saturday. Get outta here, bye! - Bye. - You know, a cucumber sounds really good right now though.