The Pride Episode | Reading Reddit Stories

- Welcome back to "Reddit Stories". I'm Shayne, and it's Pride Month, and so we are doing some more queer Reddit stories. And joining me today are Taryn and Cammie. from the "Staying Up Podcast". Thank you so much for being here. - We're so excited. - Hello. Thanks for having us. - We are ready. - The last time we did this episode, people wanted queer women's perspective. - Well, we're here. - Well, we're queer women and we have a perspective, so let's do it. - Here. Queer. - Good. Thank God. Okay. What's your guys' backstory for those who may not know?

- Yeah, I've done social media. for as long as I can remember. Kind of when it wasn't a career, I stumbled into it. Then met this lovely lady. - Used to work at Patreon. We met from a mutual, like a creator's show. And yeah, I'm just boring marketing person. - No, she's amazing. - And now we have a podcast just talking about our life, and it's-. - And we're married. - And we're married. Oh my god. We got married last year. So fun. - Yeah. - Good times in our life. - Very cool. Well, awesome.

And you are familiar with Reddit? - Very familiar. Well, actually no, I've never been on it. (everyone laughs). - That was crazy. - So you're a liar. - Before this I said, "I'm gonna go with whatever you say.". And then she just flat out lied and I went... - I mean, like I know what it is, but I've never dabbled. - Yeah, we haven't gotten too like deep into Reddit. But we know it's crazy, and we're ready. - But I watch the stories. via this show and TikToks and stuff. But I've never been on Reddit. I'm such a liar.

- Yeah, before we started you were like, "I should get into Reddit.". And I was just like, "No, you don't need to do that.". - Yeah. Wow. - That's what I say to everyone. I'm like, "You don't have to do that.". - And then she's like, "I love Reddit. "Reddit's my favorite website.". - I don't know where that came out. - Yeah, go around telling people Reddit's your personality. That'll go really well. - Oh my god. - All right, well let's just hop into these. Are you guys ready? - We are so ready. - Okay, here we go. This first title, starting off strong. This comes from the Am I The Asshole subreddit. "Am I the asshole for making a gay sex joke?".

- No. - We'll find out. (everyone laughs). - Yeah. You never know. - That's it. - Next. - You really never know. Okay. "Heya, people. I think this is the right sub for this. "So let's get started on the story and y'all can judge me.". This is a 22-year-old man. "My friends and I were at a friend's house, "Jacques, who's 23. "And we were drinking and chilling in a responsible manner. "I'm gay. Been out for a year now. "While we were drinking, Jacques makes a comment, "and I turned it into a sex joke because why not?

"The atmosphere had been pretty lighthearted. "Everyone was (beep) around. "All was okay. "Everyone freezes. "Jacques asks me, 'What the (beep) do you mean by that?'. "So I explain, and he looks visibly uncomfortable. "and tells me that I'm not funny. "and that gay men shouldn't make these sort of jokes. "around straight people. "because it was essentially me hitting on him. "And like two other of my friends agree. "The atmosphere doesn't go quite back to normal, "and Jacques moves further from me. "after calling me an unbelievable asshole. "And so I make an excuse and bounce.

"Razor, my best friend, who's-". (everyone laughs). I'm assuming these are not real names. - Okay, okay, okay. - This person just very creative. with the names they're creating. - I like it. - Wild. - "Razor, my best friend who's gay. "and has been out for longer than I have, "thinks they're overly sensitive. "And he followed me immediately when I left. "and said some choice words about Jacques. "and the two friends who defended him. "I don't know how to feel. "When I was younger I had issues with boundaries, "so maybe I did transgress some. "And Jacques told me that unless I apologize.

"for making him uncomfortable, I'm not welcome in. "So what do y'all think? "Am I the asshole for making a gay sex joke. "around a group of mostly straight people? "Edit. He said, 'Bottoms up,' and I stood up.". (Cammie laughs). That's pretty good. - So good. - That's pretty good. - Jacques. Or not Jacques. What's his name? Person. - We don't know OP's... We call him OP whoever was-. - OP. - Okay. OP. - Edit number two. "Over 3,000 people now know I'm a bottom. "Thank you, Reddit.". Edit number three. "To clarify something,

"I wasn't the first person who made a sex joke. "Others were made.". Okay. - He did nothing wrong. He made a silly joke. - And it was good joke. - And it wasn't about anyone else. He was just like, "Bottoms up, I'll get up.". - Yeah. That's hilarious. - That's hilarious. - That was incredible. I think there's a little internalized homophobia. maybe going on from Jacques. - 100%. Something's up with Jacques. - Yeah. - [Cammie] Something's up with Jacques. - Jacques needs a hug. - Especially if he's saying other sex jokes were made. - Yeah. - It's just like that one wasn't okay. That's not even that explicit of a joke.

- No. That was light. - I was expecting something like, okay, maybe it was very intense or whatever, but like-. - I would say that in front of my family. - I would too. - Yeah. - They wouldn't get it. But it would be fun. - It would be fun for those who do. - Yeah. Yeah, no. He's fine. I feel sure about that that I felt about anything. that Jacques shouldn't be mad at that. - Yeah. Something tells me, this is me just filling in with my brain. - [Taryn] Go on. - That Jacques would be the type then to also be like, "Man, you can't say anything these days.".

- Oh yeah. Yeah. - 100%. - Come around and be like-. - Which is ironic. - Wow. - Can't even take a bottom joke. - The verdict was not the asshole. - No. - No. - [Shayne] Obviously. - Did anyone say he was inappropriate? - Well, he said that some other friends backed up Jacques, but he did say his friend Razor. also said they're being overly sensitive. - Yeah. And whatever Razor says must be right. - We must listen to Razor. - But Razor, nothing affects Razor. - No. - No. - Razor is so chill. - Razor's cool as hell. - We have a few comments here.

Someone said, "Not the asshole. "Once I saw what the joke was, that is incredibly tame, "and their reaction is a bit homophobic.". Someone said, "Holy shit. Seriously? "Before I read the edit, "I thought maybe the joke had crossed the line. "into harassment, "i.e., unwanted advances on someone as a joke. "The joke wasn't even at someone. "It was literally a statement about OP themselves. "This person is just homophobic as (beep).". Someone said, "I laughed out loud. "You were poking fun of yourself, "not even the gay community at large. "So really don't see any issue here.

"Edit, if you live in Canada, let's be friends.". OP said, "I'm planning to move there soon.". (Cammie and Taryn gasp). Okay. - Oh my god. At least we're getting a friendship out of this. - Yeah. - Or perhaps he found his top. - Maybe. Maybe. - Ooh! Lastly, someone said, "Maybe for his next birthday. "OP can get Jacques some pearls to clutch. "Not the asshole at all.". - Yeah. - Love that. I'm gonna steal that. - Agreed. Agreed to all of the above. - Some pearls to clutch. - Yeah. - It wasn't even like a sex joke. It was like an identity joke. - Really. Yeah. - Literally he just identified and stood up.

- Yeah. He was just being clear. (Taryn laughs). - Yeah. - I think I love him. - Super funny. They got a round of applause from our room, so killer joke. - Special. Special. - All right, let's move on to the next story. That was a good starter one. - Good start. - Calm. Tame. - Yeah. Yeah, calm before the storm. All right, this next story also comes from Am I The Asshole. "Am I the asshole for taking my straight female friends. "out to a lesbian bar. "because they always make me go to gay bars?".

Okay. "I'm a 26-year-old man and straight. "I have a group of friends with a few more women than men, "and we go out a couple nights a week. "Every time we go out, "the girls all insist we end up at a gay club. "at the end of the night. "To be clear, I don't normally mind, "but it's getting excessive. "I can't remember the last time they didn't insist we go. "And lately I've been getting hit on a lot, "and some of the drunk guys at the bars get very handsy. "It's gotten uncomfortable at this point,

"so I've started leaving early to go home. "or hang out with other friends. "Some of the other guys in our group feel the same way. "I tried to bring it up, but they don't listen. "and accuse me of acting homophobic, which I am not. "My sister is bi and suggested our city has a lesbian bar. "and I should take them there to see how they react. "To be clear, this bar does openly welcome straight. "and cisgender people, so we weren't violating their space. "Anyway, there was a basketball game last night, "and this bar sets up a game night. "whenever our local NBA team is playing. "I suggested we go there to watch the game,

"and most of the group came along. "They immediately got really uncomfortable. "when other women started flirting with them at the bar. "and offering to buy them drinks. "It lasted about an hour before the girls all took off. "A couple of the other guys and I actually ended up staying. "The women there were all really cool, "and we made some new friends. "The group chat this morning has been a big argument. "The girls all say it was (beep) up that we took them there. "I told 'em to stop acting homophobic. "The other guys in the chat are mostly supporting me. "and saying they have no leg to stand on. "since we always constantly agree to join them at gay clubs.

"and never complain. "I actually want to start going there. "regularly on game nights. "It's a really fun atmosphere, "and everyone we met was awesome.". So, okay. Interesting. - Yeah. - What do you think? - This one's layered. - I know. - My issue with this one is that he's bringing them there. to kind of reverse it and be like, "See? You don't like it.". - [Shayne] Yeah. - Which I don't really love our space being used. as like a gotcha moment.

- 100%. - Don't come. - Yes. - But if he wants to come and hang out and be respectful, I'll allow it. But that's what I didn't like about it. But he's not the asshole for flipping it on them. It's just including us. 'Cause I could imagine like I'm at a bar, all these straight guys and women come in, the women are obviously uncomfortable, then I'd be like, "What are you doing here? "Get outta here.". - Yeah, imagining that I'm in that scenario. is really annoying. - Yeah. - But as the observer of this story, I'm not that annoyed. But if I was at the bar. and there's like a group of people that I'm like,

"What are you guys...". Like, knowing he's teaching her a lesson or whatever. I'm like, "Don't do that here.". - I think they're all assholes, I've decided. - Yeah. You think everyone's the asshole? - I think everyone's the asshole in this. - I think I do too. - 'Cause it's like you don't need to go to a gay bar. You're not gay. If you're going with your gay friends, great. If you're being invited in the space. But it sounds like the straight girls. are wanting to go to the gay club. 'cause they're not having to deal with men hitting on them. - [Taryn] Yeah. - [Shayne] Right. - The men don't wanna go. There's nothing wrong with that. Don't go. And then they're coming into the lesbian bar, which where are they finding a lesbian bar. is my first question 'cause there's far and few in between.

- Well, he said his sister is bi. and suggested our city has a lesbian bar. that I should take them to. So his sister-. - Oh, they were with... - Recommended it. I don't know if they were with the sister. - That would change things. - I'm just saying I'd like to go to it. Wherever this bar is. - Wherever they are. - I would like to pop in. - Got like good trivia or something. I'm in. - Yeah. And then showing the games? - Yeah. - We're having such a hard time. finding the women's basketball games. I'd love to go to this bar. - I also had a moment during that story. where I was like realizing you were reading to me,

and I just thought, I haven't been read to in so long. - Yeah, this is cute. - I was like, "This is so sweet.". - Should we get comfy? - And I was like feeling this was a weird story. to have you read to me, but I'm loving it. - I have moments where I'm reading these stories. where I kind of like, 'cause I do it so much, where I kind of almost like view myself from above. Like, am I reading Reddit for two hours straight here? And I'm just like, yeah. - You're really great at reading. - Thank you. I think I've gotten better. - You're really good. - It's really good. I'd be stumbling. - Yeah. Same.

- Interesting. Yeah. I think for me it's like everyone's the asshole, or is it also just like this situation. is so much more complicated than it needed to be. - Yeah. - 'Cause he could have just said, "Hey, like can we sometimes not go to gay clubs? "Because I get hit on, "and it would be nice to not end up there.". - Yeah. - It's the lesson teaching that's weird. - Maybe he just needs new friends. It sounds like he did say that, and they didn't respect it. And he'd even go home early, and they were mad at him. - Yeah. - I don't know. It's never good when you have to play too many games. - Yeah. It's interesting.

The verdict was not the asshole. They're saying he's not the asshole for his whole situation. - I don't think he's an ass, I guess. - I agree. - Sometimes asshole's too harsh, right? Where it's just like you-. - I'm like, you're annoying. - You didn't need to do all that, but... - Yeah. - [Taryn] Yes. - Like, playing "Monopoly". to figure out a very easy simple solution. - Exactly. Big comment here. Someone said, "Not the asshole. "This is a crystal clear case of what's good for the goose. "is good for the gander. "I assume they wanted to go to male gay bars.

"because they feel more comfortable. "not being hit on all the time. "But you were being hit on all the time. "and that would be annoying. "And they insisted you were homophobic. "for not liking being hit on all the time. "So it's perfectly reasonable to go to a female gay bar. "And you made new friends, "yet they were uncomfortable being hit on. "Honestly, it sounds like the best answer here. "is for the group to split up. "with the women going to the male gay bar. "and the men going to the female gay bar. "Everyone wins. "Friends-". - No. Straight people stop coming to gay bars. What? - I was just gonna say. - No.

That is not the answer. - I was like, what's going on? - Everyone's winning except gay people in this situation. - [Cammie] Yeah. - We don't want you in our space. if you don't wanna like genuinely be here. - Right. To use it as... - Yeah. You have so many bars. You have so many. - Yeah. - There's a bar on every corner for you. - I was gonna say, they're talking about the men can go to the female gay bar. I'm like the men can also just go to any bar. - Wait... - [Shayne] You'll be fine. - 100%. - [Shayne] You're gonna be fine. - I think the straight men are okay. They're comfortable everywhere. They're okay. - They can be where they wanna be. - Yeah. - Furthermore, they say, "Friend groups don't have to hang out.

"as a single unit all the time. "But at this point the girls are being the assholes, "particularly because they labeled you homophobic. "for not wanting to be hit on all the time.". - Yeah. Fair. - There's aspects of that. that I totally agree with. - I agree with that. - Someone said, someone replied to that saying, "Um, no. "Gay spaces do not exist. "so that het people can feel comfortable. "OP's female friends need to find bars. "where inappropriate behavior isn't tolerated.". Someone said under that, "Thank you. "The opinions being tossed around. "that gay men should somehow be used as a shield.

"for women seem really gross to me. "If you want to go to a gay bar. "because they have a really fun vibe. "and it's a space that's a welcoming space, "then sure, go there. "But his friends are not allies.". - Yep, there it is. - Yep. I'm loving the split up thing. Like, we don't need to do everything together. - Yeah, I don't understand that, especially like as a wherever people end up. at the end of the night. - Yeah. - I think that naturally happens. You go different ways. - Just let it happen. - It's like my guy friends wanna go to the gym. and lift weights and I'm like, "Oh, I wanna go to Pilates.". I'm not gonna be like, "You don't want to go to Pilates with me?

"Like, what?" You know? - Pilates-phobic. - Yeah, it's not like something's wrong with them. not wanting to go to Pilates. - Split up. - And there's nothing wrong. with me not wanting to go throw weights around. - It's also sad that the girls. feel like there's no bar they can go to. and just enjoy their time, except for the gay bar. - Spooky. Except the gay bar. - That feels like a deeper problem. that we will not unpack here today. (laughs). - Although we would love to. - I fear that it's gonna like, because it's starting to become a known thing. that like straight women go to gay bars. to avoid getting hit on by men. - Yeah. - Then straight men are gonna start being like,

"Well, we'll go to gay bars to-". - It's happened. It's been happening. - It's already happening. - Like, there are specific LA gay bars that you don't go to. 'cause it's all straight people. - Some other comments here. Someone said, "As a lesbian, "yes, please give lesbian bars business. "so long as you're not using them. "to be creepy towards women. "We need more of them in the US. "We need more lesbian bars in the US.". Someone said, "Please go to lesbian bars. "and drop lots of cash on game nights, nachos for everyone. "Keep them in business.". - Okay. - Okay, I love that too.

Now I've changed my mind. (everyone laughs). - I get keeping them in business. But like... How do I say this respectfully? Straight guys aren't always the best at getting hints. of like, "I don't wanna talk to you.". - Yeah, fair. - So you might be thinking, "Oh, I'm being so nice.". What? - It just happened to us the other night. We were at a bar in LA, and people came up to us. These two guys came up. to like a group of five so clearly gay people. besides Cammie. - I am gay. - But she's gay.

But she doesn't look clearly gay. (everyone laughs). - I was like, we're literally married. - And he said something like, "Oh, how you girls doing?". Or whatever. And we were like-. - [Cammie] How do y'all know each other? - How do y'all know each other? And then someone said, "We're gay.". And he's like, "Oh. "So you guys having fun tonight?" Whatever. He kept going. - Yeah, he didn't know what to do. - Kept flirting, kept whatever. And he's like, oh, he said, "Gay as in happy?". - Gay as in happy. - Or gay as in... - Oh. - [Taryn] And we were like... (Cammie groans). Happy to not be straight. (laughs).

- Oh, happy and gay. Like Santa. (everyone laughs). - It's so silly. It's like anything that... I'm gonna talk to the straight men out there. Anything clever you think you're coming up with, we've heard it so many times. - [Taryn] We've heard it. - So many times. It's not clever. It's not funny. - I also had to learn to like not bring straight people. into gay spaces, and I learned that from the queer community. I did that. I like brought my, I have a lot of guy friends, so I would like bring my guy friends and be like, "Let's go. It's gonna be fun.". And then the queer community was like, "Hey, maybe don't.".

And I was like, "Okay, I will take that note. "and I will not do that.". - Yeah. - Yeah. - [Taryn] Yeah. - 'Cause yeah it makes sense. 'cause, you know, they can go everywhere else. - Yeah. - Exactly. - Yeah. Hey. Wow. I get it. (everyone laughs). - I think I get it. - I get it. - I think I understand. We have a little note here. According to the Lesbian Bar Project, there are now 32 lesbian bars in America. - Amazing. - The Lesbian Bar Project started as a short documentary.

and fundraiser in 2022. A number of things have led to it being such a small number. Queer spaces targeted by lawmakers, gentrification, et cetera. Yeah, 32 is far lower than I would've expected. - 32 in all of America. There's like 32 bars down the street. - If I had to have made a guess about LA, not knowing anything, I would've been like, "Oh, there's gotta be at least a dozen.". - Yeah, I think that number might have one added. because The Ruby Fruit in LA opened since that was done.

I think I just saw this stat. - Yeah. Yeah. - But it's crazy. - But literally there's one in LA, and it is packed. I mean, there might be more than one. - I think there's one, and all the other ones are just popups. - Yeah. - So there's like queer events, but actual structure that's always there. - So then to have like your one space. infiltrated. - In like one. of the gayest cities in America. - I'm so confused why there's not more in LA. - It's really wild. Because then if you compare that, I don't know how many male gay bars there are. Would love that number. Anyone? Look it up? - Well, like WeHo has like 10.

- 10 on one block. - On one block. Yeah. 10 on one block. She said it. - 10 on one block. - [Shayne] Wow. - Yeah, it's a wild set. - So the new lesbian bar that's opening like now. is the first lesbian bar in like 10 years? - Yeah, in LA. That's crazy. - And it is packed. Out onto the street. - Yeah, I didn't realize. it was the first in a decade. I thought at least something had happened. - Yeah. - I haven't even been in LA for a decade. - Give the girls our bar, you know? - And like the proof of concept is there. All the popups are always so crowded.

- Yeah. - I can't believe there's not more. Should we open a bar? (laughs). - Should we all open a bar? - [Cammie] That'd be awesome. - Yeah, I'll be part of it. (everyone laughs). What's up, guys? Welcome in. I'm not gonna go in. No. I opened it, but I'm not... - You can be the bouncer. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - [Cammie] Stay outside. - Yeah, I'll be an intimidating bouncer. Yeah, yeah. - I feel safe with that. - All right. - Oh my god. Yeah, these queer spaces, if you're coming in as an ally. or with friends that are queer, that's great.

I think that's something really special. about the queer community, that we bring our family members in. and our friends to support us. But you have to respect these spaces. 'cause there are so few. Those are our safe spaces. It's to a lot of people like a church can be. It's a really safe special place. So just make sure you're respecting it, you know? - Totally. - You specifically. (laughs). - Me. - No, that was about you. (everyone laughs). - You and you. - Nobody else is here! - That one's for Jacques and Razor. - Yeah. - All right, moving on to our next story.

This comes from the Relationship Advice subreddit. - We're ready. - Our specialty. - So no assholes hopefully. Okay. "I, a 28-year-old man, suggested a threesome. "to my girlfriend, a 24-year-old woman, "and things have gotten out of control since.". - Oh. - Ooh. I'm so excited for this. - Out of control is such a wild statement. that I'm already so scared. - I just finished watching "Couple to Throuple". so I am an expert at this. - We are ready. - I'm ready. I'm locked in. - "To preface this, my girlfriend, Tomi,

"is an absolutely cool, rad and chill human being. "I have known she is bisexual. "since we started dating years ago. "and quite clearly had zero problem with it. "She's a free woman, "and I don't at all want to impose on her, "but I feel like both she and I have been manipulated, "and I don't know what to do. "Tomi and I have been dating for three years now, "and our sex life has been wonderful. "She has only ever dated men, "but she did let me know she was also interested in women, "and we often would check them out together. "and joke around about finding our own personal unicorn.

"All in all, it seemed like harmless talk until Delilah, "a 22-year-old woman came, into the picture. "Delilah is an out lesbian woman who started to work. "at the same place as Tomi a few months back. "She is unfortunately extremely attractive, "and it seems like both Tomi...". (everyone laughs). - Hate when that happens. - Hate that. - Unfortunately she is super hot. - Bummer. - "She is unfortunately extremely attractive, "and it seems like both Tomi and I were taken by that. "I made the mistake of mentioning Tomi was bisexual to her. "when she was over for drinks one day,

"and things kind of snowballed from there. "We were all pretty drunk at this point, "and the talk was getting raunchier. "And at some point I outright said I'd be down. "for a threesome. "if Delilah ever felt like exploring her limits. "with the both of us. "She seemed unusually interested in this. "A few days later, "I got a text from Delilah asking if I was serious. "about the threesome. "It was at this point the man downstairs took over, "and I agreed to a number of things. "I perhaps shouldn't have." - Oh. (everyone laughs). - I was like, "Oh, they live on the top floor?". - It took me a second too.

It's like, and then Greg came up, and he was just like, "Guys.". - I'm like, "They heard them?". Just escalated so quickly. - I was like, "Why is the man downstairs joining?". - Okay, that little man. Got it, got it, got it. - We have the threesome cleric downstairs. He determines whether it's okay or not. "I agreed to a number of things I perhaps shouldn't have. "Delilah told me that as a strict lesbian, "she felt a little nervous being with a man. "for the first time. "Would I mind if she were. "to get to know Tomi a little more first? "I agreed that sounded like a good idea, "but after sending that, "she never really said anything more.

"I didn't actually know she and Tomi had slept together. "until I came home to her and Tomi sitting on my couch. "in their underwear up in each other's business, "which was the first red flag.". I don't know if that's a red flag anymore. - I don't think that we call that a red flag. - I wanted to wave this. But too much pride in this moment. - "I was extremely upset when I came across them, "but the two of them, mostly Delilah, shamed me for it. "and pointed out Delilah had said she wanted. "to get comfortable with Tomi first,

"and she didn't feel comfortable with a man watching, "and it was something to be taken slowly. "Basically I was gaslit until thinking I was a piece of shit. "for ruining what was going on. "and demanding to be a part of things immediately. "We came to an agreement that I would avoid coming over. "while Delilah was around. "so things wouldn't feel uncomfortable. "Yes, I know I'm an idiot. "Delilah has been over more than a few times, "and whenever I bring up to Tomi. "that it seems like she is just coming over for her. "and that no threesome is on the horizon, "she gets mad at me and tells me it was my idea. "and I have no right to rush Delilah.

"and that I agreed to this. "Things came to a head yesterday. "when I returned home from work. "and was outright told to go out for a few hours. "because Tomi and Delilah had plans. "It wasn't even like they were already together. "and I happened to walk in. "I was just told to leave so Delilah could come over. "I stood my ground and was basically told by Tomi. "that I could leave now or she would. "because trying to insert myself in her sex life. "was controlling and weird, "and she wasn't going to put up with it. "I love Tomi." - So mad. - "And she never has acted in this way before.

"Basically a lot of other things have gone on, "and one of her only friends right now is Delilah, "who I think is feeding her a load of bullshit. "and demonizing me. "One of the main things Tomi was bringing up. "was that Delilah is her best friend at the moment. "and that it wasn't fair for me to be lurking. "around the corner waiting for sex. "while she and her talked about personal life. "and that it was making them both uncomfortable. "I think Delilah just wants one thing, "but she's not hearing it. "I don't know where to go from here. "or how to try to have another discussion. "if all she does is get angry with me.

"I've been thinking of maybe writing a letter. "listing how things are making me feel right now. "and what is wrong with the situation. "Or maybe trying to speak to one of her old friends. "about Delilah and seeing if they can get through to her. "that she's been used. "But I don't know if that's a terrible idea or not, "which is why I'm turning to Reddit. "Where should I go from here?". - Turning to Reddit was a wild decision. - [Shayne] Yeah. - Reddit. - You know, this has been going on for a while. Reddit help me out. - Oh. This is a mess.

- It just sounds like she's in another relationship. - Like, dude, your girlfriend has a girlfriend, and you're not involved in this. - And you're not involved anymore. - This is not a threesome in any way, shape, or form. Oh, I feel really sad for him. - I do too. He seems actually really respectful, and like he's-. - He's doing his best. - He's trying his hardest to do what's right. But he is literally just like watching her leave. into a different thing. - Yeah, I also feel bad that he's like, "Oh, Delilah is brainwashing my girlfriend.". He doesn't wanna put any blame on her. - Yeah.

- Where it's like, she kind of owes you a little more respect. - She's really doing this. Yeah. - I feel like the thing they're missing is boundaries. from the beginning of this. Like, we need to decide what we want to do, what's okay. Like, the fact that he came home. and they're ruffling something is not a vibe. - And the fact that he's like, "And that was a red flag.". - Yeah, he's like, "Oh, they're just getting to know each other. "It was just hot in there. "They had to be in their underwear.". Sir, what? - Wild behavior. - Well, and the fact. that they were just like upfront about it. Just like, "This is what we're doing. "And you need to get out.".

- Yeah. - [Shayne] I'm like, this is wild. - Now you need to leave for a couple hours. - And then to make him feel bad is wild. - Yeah. - I understand the two girls wanting to have like comfort. in their own thing first, but not without him. - Yeah. - Or just be clear about what that looks like. Not like let's hang out every day without-. - Yeah. Maybe threesomes aren't for them. Maybe they want an open relationship. You gotta talk about it. - A very common thing on Reddit is stories about threesomes. - Yeah. - [Shayne] And they-. - Are messy. - 99% of the time go wrong.

- Yeah. - And it's always because clearly people. were not on the same page. - Yeah. - At all. And this is one where they were not on the same page ever. - No. - And now they're just on different continents. - It sounds like they didn't even talk about it. before this happened. It was like a spur of the moment, and then they just went way too far down the road. - Yeah. Yeah. Not liking this. - Yeah, and Tomi doesn't seem to ever ask him. or care about how he feels about it. But this whole thing by their description. was entirely just like they both agreed. like this would be a fun thing. - Yeah. - Yeah. - But if it stops being fun for one person,

why are you continuing? - Then it should be over. - It's also they wanted a threesome, right? Not like a throuple? - They wanted a threesome is what they said. - Okay. So why is this taking so long? - Yeah. - A threesome is like a one night let's get wild. - We don't need to get wild to know each other. - They hung out like 40 times. They went to the movies or something. - Also, the thing that to me would be the end of it. is saying like this person. that you're gonna have a threesome with is your best friend. - Yeah. - No. That feels messy. - No. - Can't do that. (Cammie groans). - Not okay with that. - This is not gonna end well.

I mean, it's not starting well. So definitely not gonna end well. - I think in reality, it just sounds like she should have broken up with him. - Yes. - And sounds like she realized she wanted to be with-. - Or said to him like, "Hey, I'm curious about being with a woman. "Would you be open to me exploring this side. "of my sexuality? "I still love you. "But I'm missing this side. "Can I go explore that?". And if he's not okay with that, say, "Absolutely not,". or say, "Yeah, go for it. "Here are my boundaries.".

But boundaries can also change in a relationship. - [Shayne] Totally. - And Tomi's not respecting that. - Tomi's 24, and like I just feel like she's still young. She's probably still figuring out what her boundaries are, what her interests are, what she wants out of a relationship. - Yeah. And our guy's 28, yeah? - Yeah. He's 28. - And the new girl's only 22. - Oh. Messy. - Messy. She wants to have her cake and eat it too. - I feel like our guy was trying to be too respectful. and didn't realize what he needed,

like what boundaries he needed. - He doesn't wanna lose her. He's afraid his boundary will lose her. But if your boundaries lose someone, hit the road. - Get outta here. - Oh, I'm sad for him. - A bunch of comments. "Delilah's a lesbian. "Of course she doesn't want a threesome with you involved. "because she's not attracted to you. "At this point, I agree with almost everyone here. "that you gotta break up with your girlfriend.". - Yes. I mean... - Someone said, "As a bisexual woman, "things like this bother me. "because it implies sex between women. "is less serious or something. "Your girlfriend is cheating on you in front of you.

"in your own home and you are letting it happen. "Sounds like your girlfriend wants her cake. "and to eat it too. "and sounds like Delilah just wants your girlfriend. "Also the fact that she has said you need. "to butt out of her sex life. "Your girlfriend having an active sex life. "without you is called cheating. "Obviously you don't seem to want anything open, "so you need to address this. "I think writing a letter is a good start. "Good luck.". Someone responded to that saying, "I am also a bisexual woman. "Your girlfriend is cheating on you. Leave.". Lastly, someone said,

"This right here is why threesomes are a terrible idea. "Let's get this outta the way first. "That threesome is never going to happen. "You need to definitely explain your feelings to Tomi. "A letter is a good idea. "You also need to tell her that Delilah is taking advantage. "of your relationship. "and having an affair with your girlfriend. "Honestly, I'm not sure my own relationship. "could recover from something like this. "if it happened to us. "Hopefully that doesn't pose to be true for you.". - Yeah. - There's something so sweet about a letter. Imagining that he's gonna sit there. and write a little letter. I'm like, poor guy. - Little tear stains on it.

- He's all scrambled. He can't even talk it out. He's gotta sit there and be like, "The way you did this...". That's like, oh poor fella. - I think we need to leave Delilah out of this though. 'cause it's like about their relationship but-. - Tomi's really getting away-. - Yeah, Tomi's the problem. Tomi's the one cheating. They did not agree to having an open relationship. Just because she's bisexual doesn't mean, like all the comments said, that cheating's okay. if that's not established. I don't think he should be focusing on, "You are being manipulated.".

It's, "You are cheating. "I don't like it. "Stop or we're done.". - I also kind of wish that he would sit back and be like, "What would a threesome look like at this point?". - He's still hanging out. for a threesome? - That's so true. That's so true. - Like, imagine now. that they're like, "Okay, we're ready.". It's like, what is that gonna be? - Delilah's like... Giving him dirty looks. - They're gonna have like rehearsed this whole thing. and he's just literally gonna be sat there. - No, that's not gonna be any fun. - Yeah, he's like, "I haven't had sex with my girlfriend in months.". - Literally. (everyone laughs). Literally. - No, it's such a bummer.

- Aw. - Yeah. No threesomes. - If I was his friend, I'd just like, "I think your girlfriend is moving on. "to a different part of her life.". - She's gone. She's gone, buddy. - Yeah. This episode of "Reddit Stories". is brought to you by Factor. Warmer, sunnier days are on the horizon, and there's no better way to prep. for your summertime wellness goals than with Factor. They are awesome. These meals are dietician approved, chef crafted, and they're ready in just two minutes,

and they are so delicious. They've got premium ingredients, like filet mignon, shrimp, blackened salmon. They've got tons of different options for you to choose from. like Keto, Protein Plus, Calorie Smart, anything that'll fit your dietary needs. You're gonna feel great, and it's gonna be so convenient. I love it after these long shoot days. I just pop it in the microwave, ready in two minutes, and I'm good to go. Make today the day you kickstart a new healthy routine. What are you waiting for? Head to factormeals.com/pitreddit50. and use code PITREDDIT50 to get 50% off your first box.

plus 20% off your next month. That's code PITREDDIT50 at factormeals.com/pitreddit50. to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month. while your subscription is active. Back to the show. All right, this next story. comes from the subreddit Actual Lesbians. - I've never been there. - Actual Lesbians. - We should go there.

- I'm gonna go on that subreddit right now. - Okay, so the title of this is "Pro/Con Lists.". "I've been with my girlfriend for three years next week, "and it's come to the point. "where I'm having to make a pro/con list about her. "I love her, but some things are getting harder to ignore, "and it's tearing me apart. "trying to decide if I wanna break up. "I think the only thing keeping me around. "is my love for her, but can love always be enough?". Okay, so there was an image of a notebook of a pro/con list, so we transcribed it here. - Another writer.

- "Pros. "I love her, funny, helps when asked, baseball, our kids, "financially stable, pays attention to little things I say. "Cons. "Not Facebook friend, won't let me tag her, no handholding, "no compliments, no cuddling, can be rude, "stone top, vanilla.". (everyone laughs).

- The stone top. - Not the stone top. - "Vanilla sex, haven't met family, doesn't share feelings, "helps when asked but acts like it's inconvenient, "expects me to keep house and my car clean. "but hers is a mess, "said she doesn't find me as attractive anymore, "expects me to tell her my every move. "but can't do the same in return, "acts like she doesn't care about things in my life.". - So lost. - "Have said I need attention and still don't get it.".

- Is that the end of it? - That's the end of the con list. - That was part one. - That was five times longer than the pro list. - You hate her. - Yeah. I hate her too. - Yeah. - Yeah, 'cause she hates her. - The kids, have never met family. There's so many contradictions happening. on this pro/con list. - Yeah. - [Cammie] I'm so confused. - No, 'cause at the top it's, "helps when asked" for a pro. - Yeah. - But then at the bottom it's-. - It's like huffing and puffing about-. - It's "helps when asked but acts like it's inconvenient.".

- Yeah. - Okay, was that really a pro then? - Are those balancing out or-. - Baseball is hysterical. - Just baseball. - Baseball. - Just baseball. (laughs). - Oh, sorry. That's not a... Just pro baseball. - It might be a reminder. of like there's no crying in baseball, so I gotta stay with her. - Fair, fair, fair. - I don't know. Baseball. Tough. - Whoa. - Damn. - I mean, I'm a firm believer. in if you're making the pro and con list, it's done. - Yeah. - That's a good point. - You know? - If you're at that stage-. - Have you ever made a pro and con list about us?

- No, dude, never. I would freaking never. (Shayne laughs). Don't read who put this in. - Yeah, yeah. Okay. - I don't like baseball. Would never be on the pro list. - It would never be you. I feel that you could just look at the pro and con list. from afar and see how long the cons are and just be like, "Okay, this is probably not good for me.". But they have kids? That's so dark. - Yeah. - I don't know that they have kids. 'cause they never met family. It's, again, so much contradiction. - No, I think they haven't-. - In the pro it says "our kids.". - Oh, our? - But that's also not a pro.

- It's not a pro. - This is a pro about why she, okay, I think it's a pro and con. of why she should stay in the relationship. - Yes. - Yes. - So baseball plays a part in that. - Still unclear-. - And financially stable plays a part in that. All the top things besides like "funny" and "I love her". are not really-. - Really just funny is what she likes about it her. - Yeah, did she say anything else that was complimentary. to the other person? - "Helps when asked" doesn't really count. - No, that one's out. - No, 'cause like-. - It's just funny.

- "Pays attention to little things I say.". - That's sweet. - That's like bare minimum. - Then you have, "No compliments, no cuddling.". - That's crazy. (laughs). - "Vanilla sex, no handholding, won't let me tag her, "haven't met family.". - Yeah, I'm-. - You're saying "our kids" but then haven't met family. - Wasn't the first one like "no Facebook"? - Yeah. Not Facebook friend. - That's-. - Has Facebook-. - I don't know that we're Facebook friends. - And "won't let me tag her.". - Yeah. - Which that's sketchy. - We're hiding something here. - Yeah, exactly. - Yeah. - Yeah. That's fair.

Something's up. - Something's very up. - The top comment was, "Biggest red flag pro, our kids, "con, haven't met her family. "Excuse me. What? "You two have kids and you haven't met her family? "I also agree with what many other commenters are saying. "This girl treats you like a side ho not a girlfriend.". - Oh yeah. - The poster responded to that comment saying, "They're not our kids. "I have a kid, and she has two god-kids. "that we have every weekend. "We've been together three years, so we call them our kids.

"I know it doesn't make sense to everyone else, "but it did to me when I made the list.". - I think the pro baseball. was like taking the kids to baseball. It's easier to carpool. - Oh. - I think it was like, "They're on the same baseball team.". - That could be it. - Yeah. - That's cute. - It sounds like from this list like she's staying with her. because of the convenience of it. - Yes. - Did we get their ages at all? - No, we didn't. This one doesn't have a lot of details. - I feel like three years to have this long of a cons list.

is chaotic. - Extreme. - We should be like honeymoon, happy vibes. - I could see this happening 30 years down the road. when you're like, "They don't," you're like grumpy at them. - You're like, "Should I marry someone that's ugly, "mean, stupid?". Like what? - Yeah. No. - Okay. - Yeah. Aw. - The poster also commented, "I genuinely wish I was joking. "I know the first three seem silly, "but they feel important to me, you know?". - That's fair. - Someone said, "I don't think they seem silly, "especially with the other double standards on your list.

"I think they seem like red flags.". Someone said, "Not Facebook friends. "makes me feel like they don't want people in their life. "to know y'all are together or serious. "Maybe their partner is embarrassed by them. "I'm not saying it's right. "As a matter of fact, it's a huge red flag. "OP needs to drop them fast. "OP, if you care about it, it's not silly. "As a matter of fact, "if your girlfriend tells you they are silly, "she is full of shit. "She just doesn't wanna be in the wrong. "and give you the bare minimum. "If you continue to stay with being given the bare minimum, "it's only going to get worse.".

- Yeah. - That person's speaking from experience. Trust them. - That's the guy from the last story. - Yeah, he's like, "Trust me, I get it.". - He's like (groans). - And they're like, "Why are you on this subreddit?". (everyone laughs). Honorary member now. - He's like, "The lesbians one got too boring for me.". - And all the guys going to the lesbian bar. are now here too. - Yeah. They're all coming in. - They all come in. - Everyone at a certain point is like, "Is anyone here actually a lesbian?". (everyone laughs). - The guy who's writing in, it's like not even a lesbian. It's just like a guy talking about his girlfriend. - Sorry, I'm actually a 50-year-old man.

- We've lost the plot. - I didn't know where to go. Someone said, "I made that list before I got married. "I've recently asked for divorce. "I had some good times and have a great daughter. "I don't regret ignoring the signs, "but I could have avoided a lot of pain.". - Aw. Yeah. - Lastly, someone said, "I stayed with someone. "who said she doesn't find me attractive anymore. "It ruined my self image. "I'm still struggling with it. "There are other women. "who will find you attractive as you are. "Don't be afraid to let go of things. "that aren't working for you. "It hurts, but trust yourself to do what's best for you.".

- Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah, you know, they kind of at the end of their post, they were like, "I think the only thing keep me around is my love for her, "but can love always be enough?". I've said it before here. where I don't think love is like top tier. I think respect is, and this person does not respect them at all. - No. Yeah, totally. - I also feel like when you're in a relationship. and you are not happy, you can think something is love when it's not. It's a whole host of other things.

And I don't even trust. that she feels like true deep love for her. because this person is not loving towards you. in any way, shape, or form. It's like you could, I don't know, maybe you have like love like sibling love or something, but I don't feel like this is the vibe. - Yeah. - I also feel like there's more pressure sometimes. when you're queer of, "Well, I'm not gonna find somebody that I like this much. "and that does this, this, and this,". and you kind of lower your standards. thinking that your person's not out there.

- Do you? - I have in the past. Not anymore. But yeah, I think you get wrapped up in she has a kid prior. Maybe this is the first time being with a woman. and thinking, "I at least have this. "I don't wanna give this aspect of it up.". - Interesting. - Can carry a lot of weight too, so... - Sad. - Yeah. - But run, girly, run. - The queers are struggling. - Yeah. - It's sad. These are sad. - Happy Pride Month. Shit. (everyone laughs). - What's also sad is just the universal experience.

of people like not realizing. that they're not being given what they deserve. - Yeah. - Like, that is so common. We've had multiple stories of that now. - Yeah, loving someone kind of blinds you. to the respect you deserve. - Yeah. - And it's like you always think you can get back. to where you once were that was like some level of good, and you don't know what it was like. when they were even doing that. It's like were they overdoing it? Were they puffing their chest up more? You know, it's like-. - Right.

- Yeah. I don't know. - And usually those signs are there from the beginning. You're just not really paying attention to 'em. - Totally. - It's tough, man. - Sorry, girl. - Just a little heads up for our viewers. If they try to search this user's history for an update, they are very active in some not safe for work Reddits, so pursue and search at your own discretion. - Whoa. - Let's go. - There you go. - I will be searching. (everyone laughs). - All right, let's move on to our next story,

and we're back to the subreddit Am I The Asshole. - We're back. - We're so back. - We're so back. It's like we never left. - "Am I the asshole for mocking my nephew. "and ganging up on him. "for asking whether me or my husband was the woman?". - Oh no. (laughs). - "My family, my folks, my brother and his family, "my sister and her family, me and my husband. "had our first get together. "since the thing started on the weekend. "We're all vaccinated now.". This is from 2021. - Okay. - Okay.

I was like, whoa, late to the game. - Yeah. We finally did it. Together we pulled the plug. "During which I discovered. "my formerly adorably precocious kid of a nephew. "has hit his edgy teen stage with gusto. "He had an attitude all afternoon, "which culminated in him asking me and my husband, "gay couple, which of us was the woman. "I was pretty taken aback. "and just said, 'Neither of us. "'We're both men. That's the point.'. "At which point he came up with some evo-psych BS.

"about how a male always seeks a female, "and therefore even with two guys, "one will always be the more feminine or something. "The thing is I know he knows better, "and his whole attitude was blatantly. "just trying to get a rise. "I didn't feel like ruining a nice afternoon. "by giving it to him, "so instead I decided to make a joke of it. "and told him seriously that no one had told us that, "and in that case we'd better figure it out ASAP, huh? "My husband grabbed a notepad, drew columns for each of us, "and we started noting down our various feminine. "and masculine aspects." - That's hilarious.

- "Deliberately absurd stuff like I wear more pink, "but he cries easier, he's much better at sports, "but I've got him beat in survival skills, et cetera. "At some point, the other adults, minus my folks, "drifted over to see what we were doing. "My brother immediately wanted to join in, "saying he'd never really been sure in their case either. "So he and his wife started their own list. "And my sister and her husband, parents of the nephew, "followed suit. "It was honestly pretty funny. "We made up a point system. "and debated the gendering of breakfast foods.". (everyone laughs).

"My nephew got more and more sulky. "We kept asking for his verdicts. "until finally he walked away in disgust. "and ended up hardly saying a word. "for the rest of the afternoon. "At the time I thought it was a harmless and amusing way. "of making a point about the stupidity of his argument. "without giving him the satisfaction. "of the you're too sensitive rise. "he was obviously looking for, "but earlier today from his brother, 19, "he was not at the get together, "saying my nephew was really upset. "and accusing us of being a bunch of adults ganging up. "on a child and of drawing his own parents into it.

"I honestly hadn't thought of it in that light, "and now that I do, I must admit it's not a great look. "I still think he's old enough not to be catered to. "when he acts like this though. "Am I the asshole?". See, I think that's hilarious. - That is so, that feels like parenting 101. That was perfect. I'm like gonna write that down. Yeah. - They seem so cool. - Yeah. - Yeah. Do we all agree? I feel like we all agree. - I agree. No. And I think you gotta like squash that shit. Like, that's annoying and dumb. - He's like an annoying teen boy.

They're not gonna have like a come to Jesus moment with him. when they're like, "Let me explain to you.". - Well, and he already knew. They're like, "He knows better. "He's trying to be a little asshole.". - He's literally trying to piss us off. - They have to out asshole the asshole sometimes. And that's fair game. - 100%. And that kid will remember this in 20 years and be like, "That was actually a solid move.". - No, that was hysterical. I loved that. - They yes-and it. Okay. Yeah. - I feel like that could have been an episode of "Bluey". - Honestly. - You know? And I trust anything they do for parenting. - They would. They would've done it well. - Yeah. - I'm curious where their debate of the gendering.

of breakfast foods went. - I know. I want more on that. - You wanna give it a go? What do you think? Pancakes? - Female. - [Shayne] Yeah. - For sure. I mean, what kind of. question is that? - Waffles though? - Female. - Male. I think male. - I feel female. - No, they're like rigidy. They're like... - Yeah? - Like, yeah. - But like can hold a lot emotionally. - No, but like put a face on it. And what do you see? - I still see-. - I see waffles as a dude. - Yeah. - Bummer. - But I don't know. - Dang. - [Shayne] Depends on the shape of the waffle. - Am I the asshole? I think waffles (laughs).

- You said the moon was-. - I said waffles are women. - You said a moon was a male yesterday, so I think-. - I did say that. That got me canceled. - Yeah. You don't know. You don't know. - I thought the moon was giving man energy because-. - Does it not? - No, clearly female. What? - You must agree now that it's-. - You're gonna get so much hate. - I don't have an opinion. - Lesbians will come for you. - I don't have an opinion. - I just thought he was like derpy moon. I thought that was-. - No, she's beautiful. - Look at that stupid piece of shit up there. (laughs). - Look at that dumbass.

- He's vibing, you know? He's up there like-. - No, she's beautiful. - Well, whatever. - Yeah, yeah. - Let's see. - Orange juice. Orange juice. - Orange juice. - Non-binary. - The only people that I know. that drink orange juice on their own is men. - Yeah. - It's men. - Do you drink orange juice? You look like you drink orange juice. - I only drink orange juice if I'm at a diner, and I'll often get it. - That's a great law for yourself. - Okay, okay. (Shayne laughs). - Yeah, that's my rule. If I'm home, I'm like, "I can't.". - I can only have one. - Sorry. I have to be-. - I can't keep it in the house. - I have to be at Denny's.

- What about granola? - Granola? For some reason-. - It's still a male to me. - I'm thinking male for that. - Yeah. - And I'm thinking eggs. go through a lot of different stages. Scrambled, men. Sunny side up, I'm thinking... - Why does it have to be a female? - You're seeing a breast. - No. (everyone laughs). No! (everyone laughs). Different forms of it. - Okay. - I'm just like, it's an egg. It has to be a female, right? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. We have the eggs. - It's the egg. We have the eggs.

- We have the eggs. - You have the meats. We have the eggs. (everyone laughs). - Difference between an omelet and a scramble. This debate could go on. - I know. - This could go on for days. - [Shayne] Yeah. - Wow. - Shall we? - Anyways, the verdict was not the asshole. - Yeah, no. Hysterical. - "Not the asshole. "He was being a brat. He knew it. "He dished it and couldn't take it, "said loosely because you didn't even really dish it back. "You joked about yourselves, not him.". - Yeah. - "I think it was a great way to make the point. "of how ridiculous that statement was.". - Agreed. - Someone else said, "You joked about yourselves, not him.

"This is important. "They deliberately did not go at the kid. "since they knew that's what he wanted. "This is the opposite of asshole behavior. "In fact, I can't think of a better way. "to handle the situation they were in. "It was perfect. "Not the asshole, OP.". Someone said, "The nephew learned a very valuable lesson. "Part of being a teenager is acting out in ways. "to see what he can get away with, "and he just learned. "more clearly than if he'd gotten chewed out, "a very firm limit to how he can act in public. "As an aside, this had to feel so good for his parents. "to participate in, given that they probably deal.

"with this kid's stupid edge-lord shit.". (everyone laughs). Yeah, the reality is they showed him how dumb he is. - Yeah. - Yes. - And that sucks. - Without bullying him. - Without bullying. Yeah, they never, I feel like I would have, in the moment, I would've been like, "You little twerp," or something. So I respect their way of handling that. - Stayed calm, made it fun. Made it a little bit. - Yeah. It was a fun little bit. - All right, next story. This comes from the subreddit Bisexual.

"Found out I was bi in a committed relationship, "and my boyfriend flipped. "This is a long post, so I'm warning you in advance. "I honestly just need advice. "I'm gonna start with a bit of background. "I'm a 20-year-old woman, and my boyfriend is 23. "I've been dating him for three years now. "I love being with him, but I've questioned my sexuality. "since I was a freshman in high school. "Around this time, I started noticing how I'd feel looking. "at other pretty girls in my school. "Also, there was a long period. "where I could only get off to lesbian porn. "and nothing else. "Looking at pretty women made me feel giddy,

"like a dopamine rush. "It was more than just admiration. "I used to daydream about being with another woman. "I pushed these feelings down though. "Conservative family, and I am still attracted to men, "so I ignored my attraction to women because it felt wrong. "Recently, I haven't been feeling as sexually attracted. "to my boyfriend, "which could be more of a hormonal imbalance, "and also because I don't want to get pregnant. "We don't have protection. "But even besides that, I find myself considering. "if I would be happier with a woman. "When I'm horny, I use my vibrator. "instead of initiating sex with my boyfriend.

"One day I visited this exact Reddit community. "to skim through and read people's posts. "to see if anyone was struggling with their sexuality too. "when my boyfriend saw my phone. "and completely went berserk.". - Oh no. - "I was embarrassed to tell him I was viewing posts. "from the bisexual Reddit community, "and I had a good reason. "He immediately started yelling. "about how he was angry I wouldn't tell him I was bi, "and then he proceeded to tell two of our mutual friends. "that I was bi and that he wanted to leave me. "Mind you, I haven't come out to anyone, not even my family,

"because I literally am not ready to come out yet. "But my boyfriend told our friends with no consideration. "of how it would make me feel. "Then that night when he calmed down, "he came to apologize for his outburst. "and said he still wanted to be with me. "He proposed that if I wanted to have sex with a woman, "that it should be with him involved.". - We already know this won't work well. - We're back to this other story. "I feel so conflicted and turned off by his actions. "I want to explore other options, "but we live together and I honestly just feel stuck now.

"I have no money saved up, "and my family is over 800 miles away in another state. "I guess I'm just crying out for help. "or advice on what I should do. "if anyone else has gone through something like this. "Edit, thank you so much for all the support on this post. "Y'all don't understand how much it means to me. "I'm going to reflect some more on my decisions, "and I plan to silently save up money. "so I can get outta this situation. "I have about four months left on the lease, "so I'm running out of time, "but I'm going to do what I can.". - Drop the Venmo, girl. - Sweet little baby gay.

Yeah, what year was this from? - This is from a couple months ago. - Oh wow. We gotta go find this. - We're starting a fund. - I feel so bad for her that like... Well, for one, he went and told other people immediately. - Yeah. - [Shayne] Which is crazy. - That's kooky behavior. - That's sucks. And she feels so trapped. Like, that's not a fun feeling. - But also to come back I think that same day. after this extremely, like her coming out not by choice. - Yeah. - And then to him to come back and be like,

"All right, we can have a threesome.". - Yeah. - Is crazy. - It's crazy. - Insane. - It is absolutely insane. - He's like, "You know what? "I thought about it. "I'd like to be involved.". (everyone laughs). - I'm okay with it. Yeah, and like that's what's so frustrating. and where I feel so infuriated for bisexuals. where it doesn't mean that you're wanting both partners. at the same time. It doesn't mean cheating. It doesn't mean threesomes. It doesn't mean confusion. And I hate that that's put on bisexuals so much. - She was just in the comfort of her little phone.

- Private. - Scrolling away. Yeah. - She was outed there, then outed to her friends. - Yeah, to mutual friends. At the very least, she's saying like, "I have suppressed everything.". She's 20. And she was literally going to the subreddit. to try to seek advice and try to understand herself. And then-. - It just blew. - Out into a storm. - I think she's for sure gotta get out of here. - Yeah. - I think that's-. - And I think she knows that. - Yeah. - 'Cause she has this desire to explore her sexuality. - Yeah.

- And she can't do it with her partner. 'cause he's not gonna be a supportive partner. in this clearly. - Yeah, well, he broke her trust multiple-. - Immediately. And I get he was angry, but that's just not an excuse. - If when he gets angry, he's gonna just completely betray your trust and-. - Yeah. - And he yelled. Like, icky. - Yeah, it sounds like he was trying to hurt her. Like, he felt hurt, so he was trying to then hurt her back. - Yeah, he probably felt embarrassed. - That's not gonna be a safe space for her in anyway. - No, absolutely not. Bunch of comments here. Someone said, "Okay, let me get this straight.

"You were dating a 20-year-old man. "when you were a junior in high school. "You have moved 800 miles away from your family, "which I am going to make an assumption. "that you did for this man.". - Whoa. - "You do not want to have sex with this man. "because you are afraid of getting pregnant. "and you do not have access to protection with him, "despite the fact that condoms. "cost less than a cup of coffee at any drug store. "in the country. "You do not have a support network. "that you feel you could turn to in the area. "What friends you do have are mutual friends of his, "and you clearly don't feel you could go to them. "if you left him. "This man saw you looking at a subreddit,

"and he responded to you by jumping to conclusions, "attacking you, and outing you to multiple people. "He then heel turned and propositioned you for a threesome. "the second he realized this could benefit him sexually. "My advice is when people wave red flags at you, "believe them. "You are already neck deep in an abusive situation. "Get out, get out, get out.". Someone responded to that saying, "This should be the top comment. "OP, you have your whole life ahead of you. "Get out while you can. "and look forward to healthier relationships in the future.". - I also think like she's 20 or 23 or whatever.

- She's 20. He's 23. - You are so eeny meeny when you're 20. Like, we're 33. How old are you? Are you allowed to say? - 32. - Okay. It's like remembering how I felt at 20, I would've thought this was the end of my life, when it's really, I don't remember anything about being 20. It feels like a lifetime ago. - Yeah, my advice that I've given a lot on here is I'm like, I mean at any age, but really when you're under 25. and you're in a relationship. that you are having red flags like this, I'm like, get out. You're so young.

And you still don't know who you are. Like, I remember when I was 20. thinking I knew exactly who I was. - Totally. - I totally know. And then 30 hits and you're like, "Wow, I'm completely different.". - Exactly. - And the people you're in relationships with. will be different too, so don't tolerate that. - Yeah. I'm glad she's like saving up to get out of it though. It sounds like she's well aware. this is not a safe situation for me. - Yeah. - But I need to prepare to get out. - Yeah. Someone else said, "Your boyfriend sounds like a jerk.

"Not only did he out you without your consent, "but his first thought after apologizing to you. "was to talk about threesomes. "What I gather judging from what you've written. "is that he isn't even pleasing you, "so he'd be disappointing two women at once.". - And that would just be cruel to bring someone else in. - That's just awful. - We don't have time for that. - We need to get Delilah into this situation. - Yes. - Hey. - Come on, Delilah. - Yeah. - Get your work over here. - Literally. - "Nobody here is a relationship expert, "and only you yourself know how you want to deal.

"with the situation you find yourself in. "But to me it seems like you wish. "to embrace the other side of you. "Awful wording, so apologies. "And the more you fixate on it. "without experiencing it will likely eat away at you.". - Yeah. - "I wish you good luck and happiness, "but what I will say is don't allow toxicity into your life. "It's easier said than done, "but I would rather leave if safe and plausible. "than stay and let things fester.". - Exactly. - Yep. - I think the best advice for her is to just, she's doing it, you just gotta get out. - Yeah. Girly's gotta go. - Just gotta dip. - Yeah.

- And go explore. - Our final story comes from Relationship Advice. "I, a 23-year-old woman, slept with my roommate, "a 21-year-old woman, "and don't know how to handle my life now.". - Oh. - "I've been basically in love with my roommate. "since we met three years ago, "but she never gave any indication she was bi or gay. "and is pretty like strongly hetero. "in the sense that she loves romance stuff. "and talks about finding a rom-com type dude.". - Oh. - "It was totally fine, and it never affected our ability.

"to, you know, be roommates. "A few weeks ago she randomly brought up like, "'I wonder what it would be like. "'to kiss a girl,'/'is it different'/whatever.". - Not so straight after all. - "We made out a couple times, and it was good, "and I was somehow able...". - What? - So that was easy. - The way it just jumped. - "And I was somehow able. "to remain a normal person afterward. "But then two nights ago things progressed, "then got out of control, and we had sex, "and that's when I stopped being able to handle shit. Haha.". (everyone laughs). - Then got out of control. - The queer panic.

She's like, "Can't take it.". - "Now she wants to cuddle and is like, "'Maybe I do like girls,' saying stuff like that. "Should I take that as a sign it's okay. "to make a romantic move?". - My guy. - The sign is glaring! - "How do I know and how do I approach it with her? "Should I just ask her on a date and go from there? "I've been avoiding her during the day since we had sex. "because I'm freaking out.". - She avoids her during the day, but at night she comes alive. (laughs). - She's like, "Hello, cuddle time?". - I'm ready.

- I just love that they had sex, and it's like, "Should I make a romantic move?". - Is she into me? Does she like women? - So like what are we? - 'Cause like we sleep together every night, but... - Should I try to kiss her? - What is this? My bigger concern are her feelings down the road. If this progresses and if she's comfortable. being this girl's little experiment, her sexuality experiment, why not benefit from it? - Yeah. - Have a grand old time. But then in a couple months, if she goes, "Just kidding, I have a boyfriend now,".

are you gonna be able to be roommates with her. and see her every day? - Yeah, she starts it off with, "I've basically been in love with this person. "for three years.". - Yeah. Yeah. - Or not for three years, but, or no, since we met three years ago. - Yeah. - Okay. So she's been down bad. - I'm worried for her. - She has been down bad. - And I fear that the roommate's having fun. and then she's gonna eventually like, at the very least say, "Yeah, I am bi or I am gay,". but wanna go explore that and live her little life. - Right. - And I feel bad for our writer. She's gonna... - Yeah, 'cause this is a 21-year-old woman,

like this is a 23-year-old and a 21-year-old, so they're very young. - This is not your wife. - It's not like, oh, then this is good forever. - You don't know that, that it's not her wife. - Oh yeah, we can't say that anymore. On our podcast, we made some people kind of sad. - Because we were saying something like, "Oh, you know, your first relationships. "in your early 20s, "like it all gets better and it's not a big deal.". - Of course that one's gonna end. - Of course it'll end. And everyone was like, "What?". As they're like watching our podcast. with their girlfriend in their early 20s. So we've learned. - Maybe this is the love of their life.

- There's always exceptions. - Could be. (Shayne laughs). - I don't think this is it. - You don't know that. - I don't know that, but... - I feel like she should, I hate to use this term, she should ride it out. I think it's not-. (Cammie laughs). I mean, she needs to continue to figure this out. - Yeah. - You know? Like... - I think she should talk to a therapist. about what happens if this goes south. - Maybe this is messed up to say, but there's also the argument of like, when you're young like that,

it's like, oh, is this leading towards heartbreak? Yeah, but it's like you're young, like, maybe experience that too. - That's what I'm saying. - Yeah. - There's nothing wrong with that. - Unless we're gonna end up with a year lease. that we gotta break, and we can't get out of. - Yeah, debate on how much of your life is gonna-. - Yeah. - But as far as your emotions and just whatever, it's like yeah, get caught up in it. - Yeah. We all need our souls crushed a couple times. - And if they're like good friends, they've been roommates for a while, I feel like you could have like a little gal pal hang out. and be like, "Do we know what's going on here? "Are we okay to like get messy for a little bit?

"And we just need to be open and honest. "about where things go.". - That's probably the smartest thing. - That communication's not happening here. She's avoiding her all day. She's like running in, getting Cheez-Its, and running back to her room. - Like a little rat. - They're not chatting. - Well, maybe she could push herself. - Yeah. Set some boundaries. We've learned from previous-. - Try a boundary or two. - Previous stories. - Yeah. - Just talk. Just talk a bit. - But she's 20, they're not gonna talk. - A couple comments here. "I think the sex and the cuddling. "and the admission that maybe she's into women.

"is the clearest sign you're ever going to get. "that she's, you know, into women and you specifically. "That said, be careful. "The potential for disaster here is off the charts.". - That's right. - "I'm not saying don't go for it. "because come on, you've got to go for it. "But take it slow and be prepared for complications. "up to and including brutal heartbreak.". - Yeah. - "Y'all are close friends that live together. "She's navigating something brand new, "and you've already got intense feelings. "First of all, you should stop avoiding her. "She's probably a little raw as it is. "and dodging her can't make her feel great. "Secondly, you should be upfront with her,

"but avoid getting too intense too quickly.". - Yeah. - "Let her know you're into her, "but don't make it something she has to decide. "or commit to right now.". - Yep. - "Hey, I'm really attracted to you. "and I really had fun last night, "but I don't wanna pressure you. "What do you think? "So far, it seems like she's comfortable. "with the relationship changing, "so have some faith in her and yourself and talk to her. "Good luck. "I love a good rom-com myself, so I'm rooting for you.". Last comment here is, "If she had sex with you. "and is still talking positively to you, wants to cuddle, "et cetera, she's into you. "Be the rom-com woman of her dreams.

"Stop avoiding her.". - Love that. - And we have an update. (Cammie and Taryn gasp). - Oh my god! - That's a big deal around here. - I'm so excited. They're dating. - [Taryn] I'm about to freak out. - What do you think? What do you think? Do you think it gets worse or you think it gets better? - Oh, there's no way you would do this to us. It gets better. (Shayne laughs). It gets better. - No, they're dating. They're fully dating. - They're fully dating. - She wants to cuddle. She's like, "Please make the movie. "You are the lesbian. "I am not out.

"You make the move.". - Hit us with the-. - They're dating. They're married. They U-Hauled. Oh, they already lived together. Oh my god. - They got a bigger apartment. (everyone laughs). - They got cats. - Yes. - "Okay, update. "Like I said last night, "she came to sleep in my bed again with me. "And I was planning on talking to her this morning, "but I couldn't really figure out. "how to start the conversation, "and I was worried that if I was like, "'Hey, you slept in my bed again,'. "she'd think I was like telling her not to. "On Sundays we usually go to the library. "and then get coffee and just started that again. "now that it's reopened. "And I was like, okay, I can have this conversation with her.

"when we're at the coffee place waiting for our drinks. "When we were walking over there, "she was kind of walking close to me, "and our hands kept bumping, "and I panicked and started walking faster because I-". - No! - No! No game. - "I didn't know if she was trying to hold my hand or what, "and I didn't wanna be-" - This girl is oblivious. - "I didn't wanna be wrong. "And then I just felt weird about initiating a conversation. "I know I sound extra like a useless lesbian right now, "but I just...". (everyone laughs). "Panicked in the moment. "even though everything seemed like it would be easy.

"when it was hypothetical." - So cute. - "When we were in the car driving home, "she didn't talk at all, which isn't like her. "And then she was quiet and went to her room at home too. "And I got all panicked and hid in my room too. "because I was pretty sure that she was. "going to tell me she didn't want do this anymore.". - Oh God. - I'm gonna freak out. - "But then-". - Bu then. There's a but then. - "But then she finally came out of her room. "and came into my room and was like, "'Can I ask you a question?'". - Let's go, girl. - "And then asked me if I didn't like her anymore. "now that we'd slept together. "because she felt like I had been weird, which I had been. "I don't blame her.

"I honestly was freaking out so hard and I was like, 'Uh...'. "And she was like, 'If you just want to have sex, "'can you please tell me? "'Because I really like you, and I need to know. "'It really hurts that you've been avoiding me, "'but letting me into the bed with you.'". - Okay. Communication skills. - I love her. - "And I was like, 'How did you make that sound so easy? "'I hate you.'". - Okay. I hate that. Don't say "I hate you.". - "Anyway, long story short, I told her I like her too. "And I was sorry that I acted weird. "I was just nervous and scared. "So now I guess we're trying the whole dating thing.".

- Whoo! Let's go! - Let's fucking go! Let's go! - Wait, there's more. I don't like your face. - Is there more? - I don't like your face. Nope. Stop. End. We're done. Happy Pride Month. Goodbye. - Wake up. - We have another update. - Oh my god. - They're still together. They're still together. - I'm like hiving. I'm so stressed out. - I know. I don't know what's about to happen either. - Oh my god. - Yeah, you do. You've been creeping down that iPad. (everyone laughs). You know. - [Cammie] Your eyes are like... - Okay, update number two.

"Basically we made out a bunch and then had sex, "but I wasn't sure if she was into me. "It turned out that she was, and we started dating.". - Okay, we just watched this episode. - She's saying, "My original post was deleted-". - Skip. - But that's the recap. "Things have gone really great.". - Let's go! - "This has been the literal most stable. "and loving relationship I've ever had. "with any human being in my life. "And I'm including my actual family, LOL. "And in December-". - Also sad, but okay. - Keep going. - "And in December I decided to propose. "because I was pretty sure she really does love me.

"as more than a friend. "I'm joking.". - I was like, that's too soon. (laughs). - No, no, no. She's saying-. - She did propose. - "I decided to propose because I was pretty sure-". - Pretty soon. - "I was pretty sure she really does love me. "more than a friend," in parenthesis, "I'm joking.". - Oh, she knows. She knows. I was like, you haven't talked? - "And now we're planning a wedding.". (Cammie gasps). - Let's go! - Oh my god. - "Wild. We also got a dog.". - Knew it! Knew it! - Wait, dog people. That's perfect. We love it. - "Sometimes I still can't believe this is real life,

"but it is. "And I couldn't have done it if I wasn't encouraged. "by you guys to well, do it.". - It was us. It's all us. (everyone laughs). - "So thank you for that. "I appreciate it more than you could possibly know.". - Wow! - Wow! - I love how we started this conversation with being like, "Your first relationship, it's not gonna work.". And at the end we're like, "They got married!". - They got married! - They did it! They're gonna do it! - I literally said in a quote, "That's not your wife.". - And I said, "But what if it is?". - And it is. - Wow. Replay. Instant replay. - But the reason it worked. is because the girl who was struggling with her sexuality,

so mature. - So mature. - Can handle her emotions, can communicate her emotions. - Chatty Kathy in a good way. - Wow. Really, really solid. - Her opening the bedroom door, like, "What is this?". - She got her rom-com. Also, the way that all went down is so rom-com. - Super rom-com. - Somebody write it. - Her being like, "Did you not wanna have sex with me?". And her being like, "Oh, the way you said that, I hate you.". It was like just perfect. - Yeah. - Perfect. - Perfect rom-com. - I get that she's nervous, but, man, it's like she did everything. to make that not happen. - Yeah. She was sabotaging.

Self sabotaging. - She was overthinking it. Yeah, she was overthinking. - Yeah, yeah. - Wow. She just needed to have that first girly experience, and then it all-. - She was like, it all clicked. - Kicked off. - Yeah. Happens. - Oh, I wanna go to their wedding. Was this old? - The original post was from-. - I do wanna know how long they were dating. before getting engaged, I'm just saying. - The original post was from 2020, so-. - [Cammie] Oh my god. - They're married. - Could be married still. I don't think we have any updates after that, so... - Congratulations, guys. - Wow. Love that.

Go girls. - Send us your registry. (laughs). - Yes. Four years a little late, but... - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - That was so sweet. We finally had a positive one. - Thank you for that. Ended on a great note. - We needed that ending and we loved it. - I'm like exhausted from that, that emotional rollercoaster. - Queer love. - Sweating now. - Yeah. Well... - That was beautiful. - Beautiful. - Thank you for sharing that. - Absolutely. Great. Yeah, I mean, these were some good ones. Some some crazy stories. Thank you both for being here. - Thank you for having us. This was so fun. - So fun.

- I loved it. - Super cool. - Can we take these flags home? - Sure. - Are those ours now? (laughs). - Hang it outside of our house. - Just one right there and the flag's like... - Mini Pride. - And tell us where can people find you guys? - Go ahead, babe. - "Staying Up Podcast". - Yeah. - Just Google shmoogle. It'll be there. - Google shmoogle it. - Fantastic. Thank you all for watching. Let us know what other themes. and subreddits you want us to cover on this show, and we'll see you next Saturday. Goodbye. - Bye. Oh my god, I wanna go read Reddit stories now.

- Same. - That was thrilling.