The 4/20 Episode | Reading Reddit Stories

- 4/20. Hi, welcome to "Reddit Stories.". I'm Shayne. And this is our 4/20 episode, which means it's all about substances and other such things. And joining me today are Tommy and Chanse. - It was a lot of substance. (crew laughs). You're gonna freak them out at home. - What? What? What? Oh hey. What's up? What's up? - You're high, and everyone can tell. - We see you.

- As I said, it's 4/20, so we found a bunch of substance stories, which we've covered a lot of substance stories on this show. They tend to come up with with funny Reddit stories, so you're gonna have a whole bunch of 'em now. Not all of 'em are weed. Apparently there's some other things. - What else is there? - What else you got? - I think alcohol. I think alcohol, probably, maybe other things. I don't know. - Let's ride. - All right, let's fricking go, dude. Hell yeah. - Let's ride. - Let's ride. - Here's our first story.

I've heard many iterations of this from people. Like, this is-. - This is a legendary story? - No, no. I haven't heard this story. I just mean it's one that I have heard. of things like this happening with other people. - Hell yeah. Also, congratulations on your neck crack. - Thank you. - That was huge. - You heard it? - I'm very jealous. - You heard it? - That sounded great. - Did you hear it? (Tommy laughs). (everyone laughs). - This is fun. Okay. - "Am I the asshole for not locking up my edibles.

"resulting in my niece getting high as (beep)?". - They look like gummies. I'm already, I already, I get it. - Yeah. The amount of times I've heard. about people getting accidentally high. - Yeah. - Like, oh shit, someone else ate my edibles. I've heard it a million times. - Yep. - "I live in Colorado, a legal state. "I'm a 35-year-old woman. "For many women, unwinding means a bottle of wine. "For me, I prefer to pop an edible or two. "and relax in front of a paint canvas, "my sewing machine, et cetera.". - Hell yeah. - That's badass. - I love her.

- It's freaking awesome. "My sister's husband had an emergency. "that resulted in her needing to quickly find a sitter. "for her nine-year-old. "I like my niece and obviously wanted to help out my sister, "but warned her that she'd probably be bored at my place. "since we don't have a lot of kid friendly stuff. "At one point after she dropped her off with some books, "I got up to take a shower. "I'm pretty sure this is when it happened. "About an hour or so later, "I noticed my niece hadn't said anything for a while.". (everyone laughs). - Shut them kids up. - She's against the wall. - "I went over to the couch to see what was up,

"and she's just staring at the ceiling. "with one of her books on her stomach. "I asked her if she's okay, "and I immediately knew something was up. "She said, 'I ate some of your candy, "'and it made me feel funny.'. "She had in fact eaten several. "of the sour gummies I had on my dresser. "that I hadn't thought to lock up or anything like that. "because I'm a 35-year-old woman. "who doesn't need to think about those things like ever.". - I'm a 35-year-old woman. - "I panicked. She seemed fine. "I called poison control. "and called her mom and panicked a lot more. "I felt awful. "It hadn't even occurred to me.

"that this is a thing that would happen. "Honestly, I did not foresee this happening at all. "Niece is completely fine. "She ended up falling asleep. "after asking me for a grilled cheese sandwich. "with cut up hot dogs in it. "and asking if we could watch a movie. "I stayed with her, kept her hydrated, et cetera, "and apologized at least six million times to my sister. "who was horrified and actually screamed at me. "Once again, my niece is fine. "Even my parents are in on it, "blaming me and telling me I should have those things. "in a safe where no one could get to them.

"How could I possibly think it was okay. "to have them around a child? "No one should ever let their kids around me. "because next time I might give them a beer, "et cetera, et cetera. "And I've been uninvited from anywhere that my niece will be. "because they think somehow I planned for this to happen. "I feel awful, like I've said a million times, "but I really don't think I'm an asshole for this happening. "I didn't do this on purpose. "I have never needed to lock up my edibles before. "for the same reason I would never lock up a bottle of wine. "When my sister called me in a panic, "it wasn't like I thought, 'Oh my god, I need.

"'to immediately childproof my home.'. "But am I the asshole here? "Do I really deserve what's happening now?". - We should exile her from society. - Yeah. - We should cast her into the ocean. - Kill her. I keep thinking about what it would've been like. when I was nine to get that high. - Yeah. - Like, your brain is already, you're kinda like... At least my memory, obviously your memories are skewed, but I'm like, I feel like when you're nine years old, you're just always high. 'cause like life is just so (beep) crazy. when you're that age. - You're experiencing everything for the first time. - To eat several edibles.

- Yeah. - Insane. I can't relate to this. 'cause like I don't have nieces or nephews. where this would ever happen. where they would just get dropped off at my place. But I am such an anxious like paranoid person. that if like a kid was like, even if like my family was visiting for like an hour, I would be like, "I need to hide all that stuff. "and make sure it's like outta sight.". But I'm that type of thinker. - Well, it sounds like the child found it too. - Yeah, the child found it. - Usually they have childproof things.

- It's usually kind of hard to get into. I mean, yeah, 'cause there also is the argument of like, when I was nine years old, I also knew not to like, if I was visiting someone to just get into shit. - Right. - It's the niece's fault! - To ask. (everyone laughs). - The niece is the asshole! - I think it's a little bit of like just a pure accident. - Of course. - It's just an accident. - It's an accident. - And the toddler sounds like they-. - She had a great time. - Not even a, she's a child. - Nine. - She had a great time. She had a grilled cheese. She watched a movie.

- Took a nap. - Took a nap. - A grilled cheese with cut up hot dog in it. - That's such a-. - That's a college ass (laughs). - Right. I also don't know like the effects of weed on children. - I don't either. I mean, you know, she immediately called everyone she needed to call. and be like, "Oh my god, what do I do about this situation?". - And it sounds like poison control was like-. - Just let her get through. - Give her some water. Just let her sit on the couch and watch a movie. - Put on "Trolls," dude. - Put on "Trolls.". She'll have the time of her (beep) life. - Not "Trolls 2." "Trolls 1.".

- Not "Trolls 2.". Maybe "Trolls World Tour.". - For them to go and just jump to this idea. that she did it on purpose and to be like, "You did this on purpose," I'm like, that's crazy. - Yeah. - Why would she have called you immediately. and apologized if she did it on purpose? You know, it's like she clearly felt bad. - Now there is this cool side story. that I like to imagine of the woman being like, "I'm gonna get you real high.". The niece is like, "Hell yeah. "Get that grilled cheese ready.". (everyone laughs). But that's clearly not what happened. - It's unfortunately, look, it's unfortunately very funny.

what I'm picturing in my head of this kid. with the book just... - Yeah, yeah. I'm a cool aunt. - Just seeing "Charlotte's Web" like coming down on them. just like... - Abigail! Abigail! (everyone laughs). - She's like, "What?". - Just like what? - Where's my grilled cheese? - Right. - The verdict was not the asshole. Comments. "Not the asshole. "It's your house. "You don't normally have kids, right? "I don't lock my stuff up either, "but I'm also adamant that people shouldn't go into my room. "I think your sister needs to teach her kid.

"not to eat random things in other people's houses. - That's just a good lesson to teach all children. That is a very important lesson all children need to know. - So true. You're nine. I think it's fair to like not be eating random shit. - You knew you should not be going. to someone else's room eating their candy. - This kid's gonna assume for the rest of their life. like anything is an edible. - Yeah, that's true. That's true. - Maybe a good lesson. - That's how the Tide Pod shit happened too. It's like stop eating Tide Pods. - Jesus. Yeah. - Stop eating Tide Pods. - "Not the asshole. "This girl is nine. "She's not a toddler.

"or someone without a brain or some common sense. "Why hasn't her mom taught her. "not to sneak into people's bedrooms. "and eat random snacks she finds lying around?". - She can do multiplication. - "My grandma was once taking care of me. "I was around 10 and had some brandy beans. "in their package on the kitchen counter. "I stole some, knew this was wrong, and got a bit loopy. "My grandmother wasn't treated like a criminal. "who had to be kept away from children. "Instead, I was checked on by my mom and grandma. "who called the non-emergency 9-1-1 line, "and the next day I was given a lecture about stealing.

"and eating random foods that weren't mine. "Your sister and parents think that. "for the one time you had your niece. "as a last minute emergency you should have gone out. "and bought a safe or locks for the kitchen cabinets? "What logic is that?". - Yeah, that's crazy. - And someone said, "A nine-year-old seeing unattended candy. "and wanting to eat it. "is called being a (beep) nine-year-old, "not being an asshole. "Nine-year-olds are assholes for other reasons.". - Welcome to the stage, brandy beans. (Shayne laughs). - Brandy beans? - What are brandy beans? - I've never heard of brandy beans before.

- [Chanse] They sound good. - But I need to get some. (laughs). I think banning the niece from seeing the aunt is crazy. - That is. It's psycho. - That is unreal. - Yeah, little chocolates with brandy in them. But I've had like those rum candies. - Right. That are shaped like a bottle? - I never assumed... No, I've had like they're like more like a truffle thing. with rum. - Okay. - But I never assumed those are like alcoholic. They're just flavored. But hey, maybe if you pop enough of 'em. - Well, the boozy macaroon from Trader Joe's are alcoholic. - Really? - Yeah. They're really good. (Shayne laughs).

- I gotta go. - They're only limited release, so they're only around sometimes of the year. - Are they around right now? - They're not around right now. - (beep)! - Just ran out. They don't have any. I went to a couple different stores to find them. (Shayne laughs). It's so good. - I gotta check 'em out. Yeah, this was... I think them banning the niece from seeing the aunt, super extreme, and them just jumping to the conclusion. that the aunt did this on purpose is (beep) crazy. It reminds me, it has the same energy of when people are like, "Make sure to check your Halloween candy.

"People are probably putting like weed in it.". It's like nobody's wasting their money like that. Like that's a lot of money. You're not just blowing it. - Gonna get these kids so high this Halloween. - Like, what the fuck? I mean, there are bad people out there, but like come on. - Right. - Okay. Next story. - [Tommy] Okay. - "Am I the asshole. "for no longer wanting to pay for a trip abroad. "if my pregnant wife won't allow me to consume any alcohol. "on said trip?". - Oh. - Different vibe. That's an interesting one.

Hmm. "My wife has decided that since she can't drink. "because she is pregnant, that I can't either. "I plan to take my annual leave from work. "to take us and pay for a trip abroad. "I asked my wife. "if the drinking rule would still be in effect. "and she said of course. "I've now decided I won't be paying. "for us to take this trip. "More info. "My wife and I both normally would smoke weed pretty often. "My wife would smoke more than me, "mainly due to the fact that I work more hours. "and she works at a grocery store. "where she can happily go to work high, "whereas I work in a job that I'd struggled to perform high.

"We both would rarely drink, maybe once or twice a month.". I like to think at the grocery store you're like trying. to pick out Doritos and she's there, and she's like-. - Those. - Those ones are really good. I'm like, "You're really good at your job.". And she's like, "I know. "I can do it while I'm high.". (everyone laughs). I'm like, "Okay.". "Since my wife got pregnant, "I knew the weed thing would be big for her, "so I was more than happy to give up smoking. "She since then also expected me to give up drinking, "literally all drinking. "I'm not even allowed to have one beer if we go for a meal. "My job, in my opinion, is more stressful.

"but also pays more, so I pay the majority of our bills. "After taking care of 90% of our bills, "I've managed to save up. "and would like to take us on a holiday abroad. "to recharge after working my ass off without a holiday. "for the last few years. "But not being able to enjoy a few drinks. "whilst on holiday I feel kills the relaxation. "And when it takes over a year to save up. "for this type of trip, "I'd like to be able to enjoy it to the fullest. "My wife has decided she will not budge. "and if she can't drink, neither can I. "So I've decided that I won't be paying for the trip,

"and we can just do something cheaper/closer to home.". Okay. - There's a few things going on. - There's a lot going, this is an interesting one. - I can tell that he's a little butt hurt. that he's paying for everything. - Yeah. - He's like, "Oh, well if I'm paying for it. "and I can't do that, then we're not gonna...". And also she's pregnant, and usually when you're with your partner. and someone's pregnant, you kind of just have to default to... It's like you are doing the hard work of, "hard work" of carrying the baby.

It's like you want to support that person. - Right. - So they're just like, I see all the pieces here. - It's weird because I would hope. that he would want to do it in solidarity, and if he didn't, weird the way he's phrasing it. that like she's expecting him to do it, and she's making these rules for me. It's like, no, you should want to do that. because she's your wife. - [Shayne] Right. - Right. That's exactly what I was trying to say. - Yeah. It's just an expectation, instead of being like... He feels like he's being like caged in. - And he is bringing up all this stuff of like,

"Yeah, I work stressful days and stuff.". It's like she's pregnant. Like, that also sucks. It sounds like there's a lot of resentment. - Yeah. There is. - Like, building. It's like you're about to have a kid, man. - Right. Squash this quick. - This is not that big of a deal. If you're this upset over you can't drink for nine months, like... - [Tommy] Right. - And it's also like, it is a weird thing of like she's decreed that I can't drink. so I can't drink. - Exactly. - Where are you guys making decisions together? What's your decision on this? - And I do identify with him. where I love to have a drink wherever I go.

Like, if I go to dinner, I'm gonna have a drink with me probably. - [Shayne] Yeah. - But I'm also doing this thing currently with myself. where I'm like, "Why do I need that drink? "Can I still have fun without that drink? "Probably.". - Probably. - And the way he's talking about it, I'm like, "Oh, I sound like that sometimes.". - [Shayne] Yeah. - And I don't like it. - I am that way too. And I also question it a lot too, and I'm a big believer of just like, and I'm also like, I love trying to be healthy and stuff, and I'm like, "Well, I know I'll feel great if I don't.". - [Tommy] Right.

- I would see this type of situation. where if your partner's pregnant, they can't drink for nine months, just actually can't, to be like, you know what? This is a fun excuse to take a nine month break. - Yeah. - It's like a cool experiment. - I'm like, that's great, and you're doing it. I'm like, what am I gonna be like drinking by myself. with you around? I'm like, that's a little weird. Like, I would feel weird there. So I would be like, "If you really don't want me to, great. "That gives me like the extra motivation. "to not do it for nine months.". - [Chanse] Yeah. - Cool. But this is not good where this is going.

But their communication's bad. Like, for her to make that decision for him. is also a little weird. - Yes, it is. - They seem to both be like, "Mah!". - I'm like, you know, this isn't gonna go, like this is only gonna get worse, right? But the verdict was not the asshole. There's a comment here. "I'll be unpopular but not the asshole. "I'm a recovering alcoholic, "and nothing gets under my skin much more than people. "who are alcohol free demanding. "that other people can't drink either. "There is no reason why normal people. "with a healthy relationship to alcohol.

"can't enjoy the occasional adult beverage. "at the proper place and time. "It's the personal responsibility of the non-drinker. "to manage their response. "I don't know you or your wife's relationship with alcohol, "but the occasional beer or glass of wine with dinner. "is entirely reasonable for a normal person. "Your wife sounds like she's unwilling to deal. "and that's not on you. "Telling you that you have to stay stone cold sober. "on vacation because she can't drink. "is like telling someone they can't have dessert. "because they are on a diet. "It's balderdash.". That has 16,000 up votes.

I definitely see that. Like, it's intense to be like, "None. Not one.". - Yeah. - It's like one is not anything. Like, that's just occasional. - The rule could be don't get drunk. Like, don't get like wasted. - [Shayne] Totally. - Be able to take care of me. - Right, right. Someone else said, "As a pregnant woman, exactly this. "I've asked my husband not to get drunk. "and also not to drink my favorite drink in front of me, "but completely abstaining is also a ridiculous ask.". 5,000 up votes. I totally get that, 'cause like that's where I'm thinking.

I'm just like, I feel bad that you can't for nine months. - Right. - So it's like, okay, if I'm going out and you're not there, like sure. Like, one or two, but like not drunk or whatever. - [Chanse] No. - Someone said, "No one's the asshole. "I just don't get why you would throw away the trip abroad. "just because you can't drink. "It really feels like a huge overreaction. "You're probably not going to get a chance. "to take a trip like this again for quite some time, "so why not just enjoy it. "and learn to relax without substances?".

I also see that. Like, I'm forgetting about that aspect. of he's literally being like, "Well, we're not gonna go on this big trip. "'cause I can't drink.". It's like, damn, okay. Like, was the trip not gonna be fun? Like, is that the only fun part? - Sounds like he didn't wanna do it anyway. - Yeah, it's... Someone replied to that saying, "I agree. "Like, this is their last trip as a child free couple. "They will literally never have this chance again. "for at least like 18 years. "because they'll have to either take the kid along, "find care for the kid, be worried about the kid, et cetera.

"And he says they usually only drink once. "or twice a month anyway. "Why is alcohol suddenly such a necessity. "that he is willing to give up this one last trip. "before the baby comes. "because his wife doesn't want him to drink? "I don't get it. "Alcohol is not a necessity for life, fun, or relaxation. "If you enjoy it, great. "I enjoy a drink once in a while myself. "But if it's such a big deal you cancel a trip abroad. "over it, that's weird.". Them mentioning that it's like once or twice a month thing, I think this is just a power thing. - Yeah.

- I think this is just a power dynamic, which is pretty rough. Sucks. - Sucks. - It does suck. - Yeah. - The answer is to talk to each other more. - Just to come to that decision together. - Yeah. How you doing at home? You stoned? - Hey. How high are you? - Hey, checking in. - What was that? - What was that? - What was that? - James? - Okay, next story. "Am I the asshole. "for letting a girl believe regular brownies. "were weed brownies and letting her make a fool of herself. "all night in front of our friends?".

Pretty cool. - I love it. - "So there's this girl in my friend group. "She has a tendency to be kind of over the top. "and stretches the truth a lot. "We all were hanging out over the weekend. "to celebrate another friend's birthday. "Apparently a few people had the idea. "to give her pot brownies and see how she'd react. "The catch is that they had nothing in them at all, "but they were banking on her acting high anyway. "to fit in with everyone else. "I didn't find out about this whole plan until I got there. "Everyone else pretended to be high. "and so did the girl, predictably. "I didn't participate in that part,

"but I also didn't tell her it was all a huge joke. "at her expense. "At the end of the night, someone told her. "and called her out on always being fake. "She got really upset. "and ended up leaving the party early by herself. "I do feel bad for her, "but I also feel like she kind of brings this. "on herself sometimes because she's always trying too hard. "Again though, this wasn't my prank, "and I probably wouldn't have planned something. "like this myself, but it is what it is now. "Am I the asshole?". - Well, they've done this experiment with alcohol too. where it's the placebo effect.

They gave a bunch of people non-alcoholic drinks. and said they were alcohol, and the people acted more drunk. They were loud. The decibel levels were louder in the room. People were more social, talking to more people. It's also like just a vibrancy, vibratey, what? A frequency thing where you're vibrating at this frequency. because you have this mindset of vibrating. at this frequency. It's kinda like manifesting your own vibe. - Yeah. I often, when I'm hanging out, when I'm hanging out with people who are high and I'm sober, I often find myself acting high 'cause I'm like,

"That's just what people are doing.". It's the vibe. People are often laughing and stuff. You're gonna end up that way too. - Yeah. - If a bunch of people start acting high, you might honestly start feeling like a little high. - 100%. - [Shayne] It's gonna be the vibe. - You get your brain to start doing that thing that it does. - Yeah. - I don't think, this experiment is like bad. It's like just take her aside. Like, have someone who's like closer to her and be like, "You're coming off as fake all the time," maybe,

and like talk to her about it. and not like make a little circus show for her. to be a little pawn in. - Yeah. - My take is everyone's like, "This girl's cringe 'cause she's fake all the time. "and stuff.". And I'm like, "All of you-". - Are cringe. - Collectively planned this thing to do this. I'm like, you guys are the cringe ones. - That sounds like she can (beep) hang. It sounds like she can find how everyone else is feeling. in a room and do that thing with them. - And I'm just like, it's sounds like she's insecure. and she wants to fit in.

Like, at least outta the example you gave us. And you're gonna sit here and say like, "Well, she kind of brought this on herself.". It's like, no, she didn't. You guys actually planned this. - Yeah. - Right. - So she didn't actually bring it on herself. And I knew people like this when I was a teenager. I'm assuming these people might be teenagers. or just really young. But I'm just like the thought of like doing all that. just to-. - Like teach her a lesson, I guess. - Just to get 'em. I'm like, that's weird. - It is also, there is an onus on her.

I know they were all out to get her, and it sounds like they were fake in the beginning, but also she has the power to decide what to do now. after they've set up the circus show. Well, was it good? I was good. That was fun though, right? No, wait, these were, they were normal? - But that takes so much confidence. - 100%. - Yeah. - But it is within reach. It is not unfeasible for someone to be able to do that. - Right. But I think your point also really powerful placebo effect.

Very real. I thought this story was gonna be. that just it was a general party, and one person made the casual-. - Right. - And then she was out there trying to do that. I'm like, okay, that's a little more harmless. That's different. But all of them ganging up on her is weird. - Brutal. - Verdict was asshole. Comments. "You're the asshole. "There can be a placebo effect. "when people unknowingly drink non-alcoholic beer. "I imagine something similar can happen. "when people are told they've ingested marijuana. "Even if she is over the top, "an entire group of people came together to bully a girl.

"Like, that's it. "She's insecure, and her 'friends' stood around mocking her. "Bravo.". 20,000 up votes. OP commented, "We don't dislike her though. "This is just one thing about her that bothers us. "Like I said, not how I would've gone about it, "and yeah, probably was immature as hell.". 900 down votes. Someone said, "To be fair, "convincing someone that they're high. "could definitely be something you could do. "with your friends, but it would end in everyone laughing, "not someone leaving upset if it was a genuine joke.".

And I'm also like, okay, if you actually don't dislike her, then why didn't you just (beep) communicate to her? Like, just tell her. Like, "Hey, you don't have to fake it.". - Yeah. - Yeah. They clearly don't like her. - "How old are all of you out of interest?". OP said, "16 to 18.". - Okay. - Yep. - And there we go. - Yeah, it really... I remember as a teenager. just like weird the things that you like, that people would just let like, make them not like someone so much. - Yeah. - And then you're going outta your way. to try to like get at 'em and then you're like,

oh, but you look back and you're like, "You were the bad guy.". - Yeah. - Yep. - Definitely. - For being so bothered by something that doesn't matter. The only thing I can relate to is like when I go out. and I'm not really gonna party that hard, like say I drove so I can't really drink. and other people are, I absolutely am trying to like mentally get myself there. Like, I'm like, "Okay, how do I-". - Yeah. Pump yourself up. - Okay, next story. This comes from Am I The Asshole. and Best of Redditor Updates. - Uh-oh. - So you know it's gonna be good.

The original title was deleted. "The original original poster's boyfriend. "tries to bring his four children with them. "to a weed wedding.". Okay. - Don't bring children to a wedding. - Especially a weed wedding. - Wait, flower girl. - And ring bearer. Don't bring children to a reception. - But I'm like, is it weed? The flower? Flower girl? - Oh, that's fun. That's fun. - Oh, that's fun. Okay, sorry. Continue.

- 30-year-old woman. "I have been with my boyfriend who's 33. "for a little over a year, 16 months. "Boyfriend has four children, "a 12-year-old boy, two seven-year-old girls, "and a five-year-old boy, from a previous relationship. "I met the children around our seven month dating. "after meeting their mom around month five. "Bio mom and I get along well. "I understand her concerns of being replaced. "and assured her I'm not trying to take her place. "in any way. "Onto the situation.

"About three months ago, I received an invitation. "to the wedding of a friend. "I was allotted a plus one. "and naturally invited my boyfriend. "We discussed the theme of the wedding, "cannabis wedding, transportation, open bar, "and a few other details. "I also discussed these plans with my BFF, "a 31-year-old woman, in case there was an emergency. "She is my support system. "as I am low contact with my family. "Fast forward to the big day. "After spending months discussing plans, "boyfriend shows up to pick me up for the wedding. "with his four children in the back seats. "I look at him with a confused look.

"and ask him what's going on. "Him: What do you mean? "Me: Why are the kids in the car? "Did you forget you were picking me up. "for the wedding today? "Him: I didn't forget. "I just thought this would be a good family outing.". - What? - "At this point, my mind is blown and I'm frustrated. "I ask him why he thought that, "seeing as how we discussed the plans. "He said, 'It's not a big deal. "'They'll only be attending the ceremony.'. "I inform him that my invite is for me and my plus one. "and not a plus five. "And besides nothing about this event is appropriate.

"for children. "He then says, 'Okay, we can skip the wedding. "'and just have a family day.'. "I told him absolutely not and that his bad decision making. "was not going to be my problem. "Sent him on his way, called my BFF, "and two hours later we attended the beautiful ceremony.". - Hell yeah. - Right. - Thank God. "Boyfriend sees this on Snapchat and goes ballistic on me. "How could I go without him? "How could I replace him? "How his children felt rejected. "How I should have skipped the wedding for a family day. "I waited until he ran out of steam. "and calmly told him that he made these choices.

"We had plans, "and he chose to try and changed them last minute. "That his changes were inappropriate. "and also not my problem. "He called me an asshole and is refusing to speak to me. "until I apologize to him and his children. "He also wants an apology from my BFF. "for attending the wedding in his place.". - Wow. - Okay. Some comments. "How is he planning to have the kids at the ceremony only? "Although even this is too much if they weren't invited. "Would he drive them back to their mother. "and return to the wedding? "Did he have sitter plans?

"Because if not, "he was either planning to sneak them into the reception too. "or planned beforehand without your consent. "for all of you to miss the reception. "Both of those are highly disrespectful.". OP responded, "Well, there was an edible minimum. "to get into the reception, "so I don't think there would've been any sneaking.". "Do you mean the requirement to get into the reception. "is that you the guests have to eat cannabis edibles?". - Right. - OP said, "Yes, but all of the guests knew beforehand, "and everyone that was in invited are THC users.".

- Okay. That's such a strange-. - That's a wild one. But hey, if it's like a... - I guess. - Everyone agrees to it, but that's a crazy one. - I guess. - It's like if everyone was drinking, it's like you have to drink to come to that. - I know. I'm like... - A little intense. - All right. I don't relate to it at all. That's so different from my, I don't like identify with any substances, and I don't know anyone who does on that level. - Yeah. - Someone said, "Why say cannabis themed wedding. "when they could just say we-".

- Weeding. - [Shayne] Weeding. - Weeding. - A weeding. - That's a good point. That's a great point. - [Shayne] That's a great point. - You're the asshole for having not a weeding. - Kill 'em. - Kill them. Death to them all. - I have never heard of a cannabis themed wedding. - No. - Me either. - I've never heard of this before in my life. But you know what? Some people love it. - I'm imagining your parents might be there. Are they also gonna get stoned? - Guess so. - Grandma's gonna be rolling on the floor. with a book on her belly staring at the ceiling.

- Yeah. The edible minimum is crazy. - That is wild. - That is so strange. - That is, hey. I guess if everyone agreed to it, cool, but like... Ah, interesting. Let's get onto this update. - Yes, please. - There's an update. - Wait, wait, can you say it? - Update. (Tommy squeals). (everyone laughs). - That was for fun. - Oh, and also I think the boyfriend was clearly planning. on like it being like a trick. so that he could just pull her away from it.

- Yeah. - Yeah, sounds like he didn't plan something right. and ended up having like the kids there or something. And then he is like, "Oop.". - Or his plan entirely was to just like-. - Right. And then it's like... - I don't know. That's wild. - It feels like a misstep. It feels like he didn't plan on having the kids that day. - Exactly. And then he is like trying to--. - Well, we talked about this, right? - Yeah. That's what I'm getting. - Yeah. "Finally talked to my boyfriend. "I showed up at his house this morning at 5:00 AM. "because the silence was driving me insane. "He works overnight and gets off at 4:00 AM, "so I knew he was up,

"and we discussed the situation and he did apologize. "Apparently he spoke to his children's mother. "and she ripped him a new one. "She did text me this morning. "I don't think she thought I was up to try. "and help his case, "informed me that he didn't really grow up going. "to social events, "and the only wedding he's ever been to was family. "Apparently they just show up with friends and family, "whatever that means. "She also thanked me for having common sense. "and not taking her children to a (beep) weed wedding. "And if she had known, "she would've switched weekends with him.

"or came with me herself, LOL. "She told me to call her. "the next time something like this happens. "I just told her not to worry about it. "Anyway, the conversation was productive. "After he apologized, "he explained that his babysitter, his sister, fell through. "She tested positive for COVID. "And he didn't know what else to do. "He said he understood where he went wrong, "but was too embarrassed to admit this to me. "This was the red flag for me. "I told him that I understood what had happened. "and wished he had just talked to me.

"He told me it wouldn't happen again. "I told him that he was correct. "It won't happen again. "because this would be our last conversation. "Four days of not speaking really spoke volumes. "And the fact that he was too prideful. "to admit his faults didn't sit well with me. "I also showed him the post, and he got upset with me. "for sharing personal business with strangers. "I told him it really didn't matter at this point, "and he accused me of not considering his feelings. "I took Reddit's advice and just left. "Didn't say goodbye, just walked out, "and blocked him once I got to my car.

"My brain started to hurt. "at the thought of continuing the conversation, "let alone the relationship. "Just wanted to let y'all know. "that I handled it the way it needed to be handled. "Thank you for the last two hours. "because I seriously thought I was wrong. "for how I spoke to him in front of his children. "Hope everyone enjoys the weekend.". - Well-. - "I'm going to sleep now. "because this situation has been plaguing me for a week, "and I'm tired.". - Hold on, girly. - I didn't know all that shit happened in front of his kids. - Yeah. And also how did you speak to him? How did you speak to him in front of his children? You left some things out, girly.

- Just saying like she's, I don't know. Just that conversation. Yeah. I wouldn't have had it in front of the kids. - [Chanse] Yeah. - I think it's fair for her to leave entirely. Like, I don't know. - He also could have not known how that, okay, so I went to a big wedding in Guatemala. and they had never done an American style wedding before. And it was like really nice, but it was like the groom's family were all American. and all the bride's family were Guatemalan.

All the Americans were like on time, like doing like the traditional. like stand next to your groomsmen, 'cause, and they had no idea what was going on. They were like, "What are you doing?". And then most of the people showed up. after the ceremony for the reception, but with whole brigade of family, and they're like, "We don't know who these people are. "We're just meeting 'em now.". And it was like a completely different culture. of wedding culture. So like it'd be interesting to hear what he's used to. - Yeah. - It might be one of those situations. where you show up with family, you show up with kids,

and it's okay to do that. But they did talk about the cannabis of it all. - They kind of mentioned that. - And the minimum. So now are you leaving early? - Yeah. - But I can get how it could-. - And I totally understand the like, 'cause I grew up where weddings did have a lot of kids. at them, 'cause I was a kid when I went to a lot of weddings. and it was just like, yeah, that was just the vibe. But I think it's, yeah, the cannabis wedding thing is completely unique. and just like its own thing. But she established that to him, and it just seems like it just went over his head.

But sounds like she's breaking up with him. not because of all that, but because after she got upset with him, he like didn't talk to her for four days. And I'm like, I understand why that would be a deal breaker. - And he was like screaming and yelling at her. through the Snapchat and through the videos. - Yeah. Yeah. No, I mean, that's fair. - I get it. - Yeah. - Entirely fair. - So who's the asshole? Not the, not, she's... - [Shayne] I guess it's not-. - Not the asshole. I don't know. - I don't think she's the asshole. - No, definitely not. 100% not.

- Yeah. - Is he? - I think he's an asshole. - I think so. - I think he's... You know, you could find a world to be like, "Ah, he didn't know or he wasn't thinking straight,". or whatever, or his sister fell through, the babysitter. But four days of silence is like, when you do that, you're expected to basically break up. - Unless you ask for space, time. - Totally. Which he didn't do. - He didn't do. He didn't do that. - This episode of "Reddit Stories" is brought to you. by Mint Mobile.

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That's Z-O-C-D-O-C .com/pitreddit. Zocdoc.com/pitreddit. Back to the episode. "Today I (beep) up.". - Oh no. - "Secretly eating mushrooms while my wife was asleep. "in a house full of cats.". - What? - Okay. I don't know. "Secretly eating mushrooms while my wife was asleep. "in a house full of cats. "This happened a good long while ago now,

"so not really today. "It was April when I started this journey. "During the winter, "I became a member of a magic mushroom forum. "and was learning all I could about growing magic mushrooms. "I tried it once before. "and grew only a yellowish green mush. "that smelled of sweaty socks. "But this time would be different. "I had a spore print sent to me and was off to the races. "I had tried mushrooms once before about 10 years prior, "and the experience was rather enjoyable. "I have had way too many bad experiences with LSD.

"to ever think about trying it. "And from what I remembered, "the mushroom experience was much less chaotic. "and harsh for me. "than the majority of my acid trips had been. "After following every tip I could gather. "and about a month and a half of waiting, "I have viable mushrooms drying in the food dehydrator. "The whole journey from spore print to fruit. "was done for reasons I don't yet have a great grasp on. "I was thinking at the time. "that growing them would impart some spiritual meaning. "into my experience. "It had been a long, long time. "since I had taken any illegal substance,

"and I wanted it to be special in some way. "Growing them myself was an attempt. "at providing that, I guess. "The night I took them, "I really wasn't planning on doing so. "I was bored outta my wits and chatting with online friends. "I told them I was going to eat my mushrooms, "but didn't know how much to eat without a scale. "I took a few pics of my intended dose and posted them. "and immediately got advice to cut that dose in half. "So with my wife asleep, I went down to the kitchen. "and made a concoction of purple slushy. "and powdered mushrooms and gulped it down.

"I came back up and told the chatters that the deal was done. "and that I was taking a shower. "and would be back once the fun started. "In the shower for about five minutes. "when I felt a rush like my consciousness. "was being pulled away from my body. "I was fighting to keep it with me. "It felt as though if I had let it fly away, "I would've had a full out-of-body experience. "But for some reason I felt compelled to hold onto it. "I quickly turned off the water and looked down at my feet. "They seemed miles away. "That is when it hit me that the shrooms were kicking in.

"Outta the shower, I put on the same clothes I came in with. "and headed upstairs. "The shower's in the basement of the house, "and there is a door at the top of the stairs. "Opening the door, "the light from the kitchen blasted my eyes. "and I got a good gauge. "of how far along in the experience I was. "I would see that the kitchen floor looked smooth. "and had a liquid like texture. "But before I could survey anymore, "my black cat ran down into the basement. "I didn't wanna forget about him down there, "and I never really thought. "that I could just leave the door open.

"and shoo any members of our herd that wandered down there. "after my trip. "I trudged down the stairs after him. "and scooped him up and started back up the stairs. "Halfway up, a brown blur flew down the stairs. "as another cat dove to the basement. "I tossed the black one in the kitchen. "and went down after the brown one. "While picking up the brown one, "the black cat came back down the steps again, "and I scooped him up too. "Now I'm carrying two cats up the stairs. "At the top of the stairs, the door is wide open. "and I see our other three cats.

"had come down to investigate the commotion. "As I made the final push to the top, "they all jumped into action like they planned it. "in advance. "I started laughing hysterically, "let go of the cats in my arms, "and sat at the top step. "as I watched all the cats bounce down the stairs.". (everyone laughs). - They're like, "Yay!". - Success. - Doom, doom, doom. - We've done it, brothers. (everyone laughs). - "I found the whole situation so funny. "Here I am coming up hard on mushrooms. "I can feel the confusion building every second, "and now I have to figure out a way.

"of getting all five cats out of the basement. "By the time I'd collected myself and devised a plan, "my face was hot and objects were starting to move. "The time dilation had manifested, "and minutes were seeming to take longer and longer. "My plan was to go down and capture one cat at a time. "and usher them up the stairs. "Once I got to five, the task would be complete. "I raced down and grabbed the first cat I came across. "I ran up to the landing and tossed it pretty forcefully. "up the last three steps into the kitchen. "so it would get the point. "that I didn't want them down there.

"Back down, I went and did the same thing. "That's two down and three to go. "I was getting more confused by the minute, "and on the fourth cat, "I had forgotten how many cats I had previously. "ushered up the stairs. "Face palm. "On my way back down, "I decided to count the cats down the stairs. "That would let me know how many were upstairs. "Unfortunately the whole time I had neglected one key detail. "in my foolproof plan. "The door was still open. "Just as I reached the basement floor, "the whole herd came stampeding down again. "I am mentally exhausted. "because apparently counting to five is impossible.

"while on mushrooms. "My mind is racing to come up with a solution. "to this impossible problem. "And never once did I think of just leaving them down there. "until they found something more entertaining to do. "than drive me outta my (beep) mind. "The white flag was up. "It was over. "I needed the big gun. "It was 2:00 or 3:00 AM, "and she had to get up and go to work in the morning. "But I had no choice. "I needed an adult. "I have to wake my wife. "She would make it all better. "She will tame those damn hellions and all will be fine. "But it wasn't fine. "I went upstairs to our room. "and woke her in the gentlest way possible.

"by jumping on the bed and yelling, 'Help! "'I took mushrooms! "'Five cats in the basement. "'I can only count to four.'. "Not the way I had envisioned it going down in my head, "but I was happy to get that much out. "without forgetting the reason I woke her up. "in the first place. "Sleepily, she marched down the stairs, "and I led her to the kitchen. "where the basement door was still wide open. "All I could do was stand at the door. "and point down the stairs. "I think I may have whimpered a little too with my gesture. "She was not amused. "I thought I was finally going to get closure.

"She would get the cats from the basement, "and I would be saved. "But no, my savior turned to tormentor. "as she said the only words in the world that could crush me. "into an even more pitiful state. "'Well, go get 'em,' she said. "She didn't understand that I was fighting this fight. "for what seemed like days now. "and wanted nothing more than to curl up in the corner. "and cry until I fell asleep. "She had no clue how close I was to breakdown. "Tears welled up. "as I crossed the threshold of the basement door. "and descended again into my personal hell.

"I scooped up a kitty and carried it slowly up the stairs, "setting it on the kitchen floor. "'One,' my wife said in a long, drawn out voice. "like she was talking to a two-year-old. "Back down I went and grabbed up another bundle of joy. "and slinked up the stairs only to be shamed again. "by a long drawn out, 'Two.'. "By the third cat, short audible poopoo sounds were coming. "from me as I was almost to the breaking point. "My wife had begun to laugh at me. "and seemed to laugh harder each time I came up.

"even more beaten than before. "When the last cat came up, "I was greeted by a sighing, 'Five,'. "and a, 'Now was that so hard?' from my wife. "I tried to apologize, but she waved me off with a stern, "'We'll talk about this in the morning,'. "and walked up the stairs. "The cat ordeal was over, but the trip was far from it. "I was immensely grateful to my online buddies. "who talked me into having the dose. "because the rest of the night was filled with confusion. "and mind fuckery and intense time dilation. "Not really a bad trip as bad trips go,

"but not at all enjoyable. "I think I can cross mushies off the list. "of viable boredom relievers. "I won't be doing them again anytime soon, "that is for sure.". - Okay, well-. - That was the craziest thing I've ever read on this show. That was-. - That was wild. It was a trip. - Holy shit. - What a good writer. - Yeah. - Felt like I was him. - Yeah, I really- - I did feel like-. - I feel like I'm him right now after reading that. - Um. - Um. (everyone laughs).

- You know, I've heard people say like, "Don't do shrooms alone of that degree,". and this makes sense. - Yeah. It sounds like-. - He wasn't alone. - He was in a personal hell. He was with his cats. - It kind of gave horror story for a minute. If my husband woke me up. and pointed towards the dark basement and be like (whimpers). No, bitch. I would say the same thing. I'd be like, "You go get 'em." - You go get 'em. - See, yeah. What he should have done is just get treats out. - That's what I thought too. Some tuna.

- But he's so high. - He's not thinking. - No, he's in-. - And also food smells really weird when you're on shrooms. - Oh. - You don't really want to eat. - Yeah. - Especially meat. - But he doesn't have to eat. - Yeah, but you have to smell it. You have to get the metal. - Oh, the can. You're thinking wet food. - Yeah, wet food. Oh, dry food would've probably worked. - Even just shaking like a tin. - Yeah. - You get the cats up. Like, shake the bag of-. - Yeah. That's so true. - Sounds like he just did too many mushrooms. - He did way too many mushrooms. - And he did mushrooms alone, which it's like, have someone there.

in case you have a bad time. - Yeah. - Which there was, but like you had to disrupt your wife who's asleep. - Yeah. - I loved her reaction. - I love her too. - That was great. Also like the, "We'll talk about it in the morning.". - Comments. "Wow. You were quite literally herding cats.". - Yeah. - Is that an expression or something? - Yeah, it's like herding cats, 'cause like it's just impossible. because cats don't respond to that. Someone said, "Cats know. "They take advantage on purpose. "Never do shrooms, LSD, "or get really stoned around a group of cats.

"They will (beep) with you harder. "than a fraternity initiation. "unless you give them a big fat happy sack of catnip, "then you're all off on the same trip.". I do think cats know when they can (beep) with you. Because I've always heard stories of when people are like, "Oh, I brought my friend over who doesn't like cats, "and my cat is like on their lap like looking at them.". Like, I think cats, cats know, it's like, "You're not in the right state of mind. "I'm gonna make your life hell.". - Yeah. - I think they enjoy that shit. - They sure do. - Have you ever had to do something difficult. while under the influence?

Like... I will say, it's a reason why I never like, whenever I'm in public or something, I'm really scared of like, getting high. because I feel like whenever I do, crazy shit happens. - Interesting. - Like, I'm just like, something's gonna happen. that I'm like, I can't handle. - Unable to... - I need to be in such a safe space. Because I just don't trust it otherwise. - I feel like I've been really high.

before I'd like do a musical improv show, but then I feel like I do really well. - Yeah. No, that's crazy. - Yeah. - That's cool though. - One time I had to do a "Reddit Story" and I was so baked. - Oh, oh my god. What? - I think a challenging thing that I had to do. while on shrooms was help someone else who was, you know, I had to be the shroom counselor. - Oh. - While someone else was having a, so I'm like, "Hey, da da da, it's gonna be fine.". And in my brain I'm like, "Is it gonna be fine?".

(everyone laughs). "It might not be.". And I'm like, "Yeah, yeah, it's gonna be fine.". - It's gonna be okay. They're going to die. (everyone laughs). - I planned a Big Bear trip with a bunch of friends, and there were a lot of mushrooms, and we had not eaten that day, and we had bought all the things. to do all the groceries and make the meal. And I got like halfway through making the meal, and I was like, "Ain't no way. "Ain't no way.".

And the time dilation, things were taking so long to cook, and water was taking so long to boil, and the meat wasn't meating, and the veggies weren't veggying. And anyways, it was a really good meal actually. - Oh, that's good. - Just took a really long time. - It just took a really, really long time. - Yeah. - Nice. - I love those. - [Shayne] Wow. - Yeah. - That was crazy. The way he wrote it was nuts too. I'm like, did he take shrooms before he wrote this? - It feels like he took, he felt like he was high when he was writing. - He might. He might be high.

I don't know. Next story. "Am I the asshole. "for telling my son the truth about alcohol?". - What's the truth about alcohol? - It's piss. - It's piss. - It's piss. - It's actually piss. Okay. I wonder if this dad's gonna be like, "It's actually (beep) awesome.". (everyone laughs). Actually it's sick as hell. And you're only cool if you do it. (everyone laughs). - That's good. - Same with cigs. (laughs). - Shit. - "Okay, bear with me. "My wife and I have a six-year-old son, Alex.

"He's very smart and curious, "and I encourage that by not sugarcoating things. "He asks questions, I give him answers. "I can't stand when adults use baby talk or kid language. "Anyway, today I was watching TV and downing a few beers. "My son asked me if I could try some. "I said no. "He asked why. "And I said, 'Because beer is an adult drink.'. "He asked why. "Now my wife and her family normally say things like, "'That's Daddy's juice or Mommy's juice if it's wine.'. "I think that's stupid. "So I said, 'Because beer makes you feel funny,

"'and then it makes you puke.'. "My son doesn't like throwing up, "so I figured this would turn him off. "He asked why I drink beer if it makes you puke? "I said, 'Well, grownups drink beer. "'because when you get older, life is really hard and sad. "'Beer makes you happy. "'and makes you forget about your problems. "'Beer makes you stop thinking. "'because you have so many bad thoughts.'. "My son just kind of said, 'Okay,'. "and went away at that point. "My wife overheard that last part and is pissed.

"Says it wasn't age appropriate. "I think I told him the truth, and I wasn't overly graphic.". That's a (beep) insane-. - That's crazy. - That's... I don't think the beer part's the problem with all that. - No. - Like, that's not the-. - No. - It's also his relationship with beer that is the problem. It's like you didn't tell the truth. You told your truth. - Yeah, buddy. I'm like, okay. Like, all right. - Yeah, don't tell the kid that life's gonna get hard. Let him have the fun. - Well, you know, life's really hard, and, you know, you didn't wanna be a father,

but you ended up being one. - Yeah. (everyone laughs). So I need a few beers. - Just like, dude, Jesus. - Beer makes me forget about you! - You! Okay. Before I like, 'cause I do think he's the asshole. I do think calling it Daddy's juice. or Mommy's juice is also weird. - So weird. - I think it's (beep) weird. I also think it does set a weird precedent. Like, it's one of those things where when kids ask questions. and there's really not a good answer for it. 'cause it's like, oh, why is it an adult drink? And it's like, well, 'cause you have to wait.

until you're older to start (beep) up your body. Like, you have to-. - Right. Yeah. - You gotta do that. God, that's so funny. - But that's a good answer. If you have too much of it, it's bad for you. - Well, it is also, it is especially bad for you. when you're a little kid. - When you're young. Yeah. - It's the same with coffee. Like, I think my parents did a good job. of explaining coffee to me when I was young, when they're just like, "You can't have it when you're still growing. "Like, it's not good for you, "but when you're an adult it won't. "Once you're fully grown, it's not.". And I think I understood that. - Yeah, that's a good,

that's an understandable like excuse, reasoning. - But I also think, I don't know. I'm also a believer, and I mean this is how I view it if I have kids one day, of like you can tell your kids don't drink, but if you're drinking a bunch in front of your kids, like that's the behavior they're gonna see. - Yeah. - That's more influential. than anything you're ever gonna tell them. - Yep. - So like you should have the behaviors. that you want your kids to have, so... But I guess maybe he doesn't care. This guy, I don't know.

But that's just a bummer. to like tell your six-year-old son, like life sucks. Life's really hard. - And it's not baby talk. It's just not age appropriate. She's right. - Yeah. I also feel it's poignant to say like, alcohol does not make you happier. Like, it's gonna make you overall sadder. - Yeah. - [Shayne] Overall. - It is a depressant. It does make you sad the next day. - Which is why I put espresso in mine. - And it cancels it out. - I'm feeling really great. (everyone laughs). - I'm awake. - And then the kid's like, "Should you do cocaine later?".

And the dad's like, "You're so right.". - So smart. (everyone laughs). - [Tommy] That's my smart son. - [Shayne] My smart son. - My smart, smart son. - See, he gets it. The verdict was asshole. - Yeah. - No, he sounds like, like a dad from like a cartoon sitcom. That's a Peter Griffin thing. Like, that's Stewie being like, "Hey Dad, why do you drink?". - Yeah. - Ah, you know, I feel bad and sad all the time, so I drink. - Take a couple down. - Actually that's a Brian. That's a Brian quote.

- That's a Brian. Yeah. - Comments. "You're the asshole. "I was with you until you told your child that alcohol. "is used to make you stop thinking sad thoughts. "You gave him the impression that everyone. "who drinks alcohol, including you, "uses alcohol as a way to ignore emotions. "and that it is entirely okay. "People can drink responsibly, "and you should have conveyed that too much alcohol. "can make you make bad decisions, "which is why it's for adults.". 7,000 up votes on that. "Yeah, I thought he was going to say, "'Well, adults drink it.

"'because they stomach it better than kids, "'and it makes them feel fuzzy,'. "or, 'They enjoy the taste of it,'. "but telling them that adults need it to cope with life. "probably isn't the healthiest introduction. "to responsibly using alcohol.". Yeah, this guy explained it in a way of like, you need to stop drinking alcohol, man. Like, if that's your explanation for it-. - 100%. - You're admitting that you're dependent on it. Someone said, "And so you are implying that you need beer. "to fulfill a need that your son can't fill. "Having a son and watching him grow could make you happy,

"but now he knows only beer will do that.". OP responded, "I like watching my son grow, "but you're tripping if you think. "that numbs my shit thoughts.". Wait, hold on. Jesus Christ. - Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. - All right. OP responded, "I like watching my son grow, "but you're tripping if you think. "that numbs my shit thoughts in the way alcohol does, LOL. "Anyone who drinks alcohol is doing it. "for one of two reasons, to feel happy or not feel at all.". - Damn. - [Tommy] Uh-oh.

- 700 down votes. I'm like, buddy. - Uh-oh. Uh-oh. - Yeah. Jesus. Jesus. - He's like, "I hate the taste of this shit. "I hate it. "I do it to numb things.". It's like, okay, buddy. - [Tommy] Whoa. - Whew. - All right. - [Shayne] All right. - Good luck to this child. - Damn. God. (beep). (everyone laughs). Let's get back to weed stories, am I right? Give me those shrooms again, bro. - Talk about cats. - [Shayne] Holy crap. - Back to this. - One alcohol story, and we're like, "Bummer town here.".

- 100%. - Okay, buddy. All right, here's our final story. - Wow. - This comes from r/Trees and Best of Redditor Updates. - Okay, trees being weed. Yeah. - [Shayne] Yeah. - Yeah. - Got it. - "My granddad ate one of my weed brownies 10 minutes ago. "I'm freaking out. "Do I call the ER? "Will I go to jail?". (everyone laughs). - Aw. - Let's see. "I'm visiting my grandparents for the whole week, "and I brought my brownies and my pen. "to their house to last the week. "I kept the brownies sealed in my bag,

"but I accidentally left the bag in the kitchen, "and I guess my granddad found it. "I walked into the living room, "and there he is eating one of my brownies and sipping tea. "I'm legit freaking out. "What do I do? "I'm only 19, I live at home, and my family hates weed. "My anxiety is skyrocketing. "Do I just tell my granddad that it's weed. "and take it the hard way? "Is it safe for older people to eat a brownie? "Edit, right now it's 35 minutes since he ate it, "and it hasn't hit yet. "I'm still on the verge of whether or not to tell him,

"but I don't think you guys understand. "the trouble I would be in. "Weed is also illegal over here in Denmark. "I will provide updates, but right now I need to calm down. "and figure out a solution.". - Oh man. - Just let him ride it out. - Just let it happen. - Just let him ride it out. - He's gonna be fine. - He's probably gonna be like, "Wow, I feel a lot less joint pain.". - Yeah. He's gonna be jumping around. - Yeah. Unless he like freaks out I guess. And then he is like, "Oh, I gotta go to the hospital.". And it's like, "No.". - You're gonna get to the hospital.

and what are they gonna do? - Right. - What are they gonna do? - Right. That's why-. - They're not gonna pump your stomach. - Danish hospital. - Oh, that's true. It's probably free. - [Shayne] Yeah. - Oh, that's true too. - Yeah. It's in Denmark. Comments. "It's safe. "Hell, old people oftentimes. "are the biggest consumers of weed.". - [Tommy] Absolutely. - "Certainly tell him though. "He's in zero physical danger. "So going to the ER would be pointless. "Probs would be best off. "just trying to get to sleep before it hits. "Take a Benadryl or something.". OP commented separately, "Weed is illegal here. "And my grandparents would freak out. "if they found out it's weed,

"not to talk about the world of trouble I would be in.". Someone said, "You'll be in so much more trouble. "if he thinks he needs the damn hospital. "I know you're gonna get in trouble, "but you've got to bite the bullet. "and tell him that he's gonna be okay, "but he ate one of your brownies. "and he needs to prepare for a head rush and probably sleep. "It'll be kinda like being drunk or something, "but you can't not tell him.". - It won't be like being drunk. - No. It'll be different. But it'll be awesome. - It'll be awesome probably. - Grandpa, it's about to be fucking sick.

- [Chanse] And... (everyone laughs). - It's about to be rad as hell right now, Grandpa. - Get your walker, get your skateboard. We're going right now. - Grandpa, put on a hat, turn it around. because you're about to (grumbles). - And I understand that you're a grown-ass man, but we don't go into other people's things and eat them. Didn't we teach the nine-year-old child that? - I know, but the grandpa wants a brownie. - Some people are not teaching these lessons. - Well, well... - Well. - You would hope he would've learned it. after however old he is.

- Yeah. Update. (Tommy gasps). - Grandpa's gone. - Oh my god. Oh my god. He's dead. - Yes. - Three hours later. My grandpa (beep) died. No, just kidding. - He's 20 years younger. (everyone laughs). - He's aging backwards. - It's working. - This is the Benjamin Button strain. "Three hours later. "Let me try to wrap my head around what has happened. "First of all, I took your guys advice and told him, "and also thank you, guys. "I wouldn't have had the balls to tell him. "if it wasn't for some of the comments.

"I also am aware that I'm an irresponsible idiot. "Don't worry. "Him and my grandma were sitting watching TV. "45-ish minutes after he ate the brownie, "and I asked to talk to him one-on-one. "about some art homework. "I sat down in his home office, "and I asked him if he felt weird after eating my brownie. "'Not at all. "'Why are you asking?' he said in a confused tone. "I basically told him straight up. "that my friend from school made marijuana brownies. "and gave some to me, but I was gonna throw them out. "He didn't believe me for one second. "He quickly put two and two together.

"and realized that he had just consumed weed. "and was going to be high. "I told him that it can take a while for it to hit him, "but it isn't dangerous, "and it's probably best if he goes to sleep. "and to please not tell Grandma. "or anyone else for that matter. "What happened next is such a mind (beep). "I knew my grandpa was an artist and a painter. "and I guess an old hippie, "but I didn't expect him to tell me straight up. "that he has smoked weed plenty of times. "and also taken edibles. "He told me about the times he would hide from my grandma. "to go smoke and how it helped him with his art. "He told me that he used weed to expand his consciousness.

"for his art projects and for his paintings. "He told me that I was a little shit. "for leaving the brownies out like that. "But he was smiling the entire time, "and I felt like he kinda liked that I was getting into weed. "for some reason. "We sat down and talked about everything for 30 minutes. "and when my grandma came in the room, "we would both shush her away. "I really felt like I connected with my grandpa. "during this convo. "Now I don't know if it's because he was already high, "but he told me he couldn't feel a thing. "He told me and my grandma to not disturb him. "while he goes working in his office.

"He has been there for the past 60 minutes, "and he definitely feels it. "Jazz music is on on his speaker.". - Yes. - Yay. - "He is lighting up his cigars, "and when I peeked my head in there, "he was closing his eyes and really feeling the music. "I think my grandma thinks he has been drinking a little. "and told me to give him his space. "I will update later tonight. "to let you guys know how things are progressing.". - This is so cute. - Grandpa's stoned. - That's fucking awesome. Final update. - Grandpa's dead. - He's dead. (everyone laughs).

- Final (laughs). He's dead. He (beep) died, dude. "Final update for you guys. "I appreciate all the comments from the good wholesome ones. "to the bad ones calling me a piece of shit. "I deserve it and I own up to my mistakes. "I was lucky this time. "Anyways my granddad basically just chilled in his office, "and I brought him water to make sure he was good. "His eyes were absolutely blazed, "and he had a big smile on his face. "I haven't seen him light up like that in my entire life. "He seemed thankful for the experience. "Anyways, I left him alone and he joined us at dinner.

"He handled it pretty well. "He was talkative, cracking jokes. "And my grandma definitely thinks he's drunk, "but she hasn't said much. "It's after dinner now and we are just chilling together, "me and my granddad. "We are talking about life and spirituality and weed. "Lots of weed talk. "He wants to know all my high stories, "and we are laughing away. "He is still baked out of his mind, "but I must say he is taking it well. "These are hash brownies. "They hit like a horse. "I can definitely say. "that it's been one of my weirdest days so far. "What started in pure paranoia is now ending.

"in what I would say is almost too good to be true. "My granddad knows I smoke and is cool with it. "I became so much closer to him, "and it's like we are buddies now. "My grandma is confused. "about how we suddenly are bonding so well. "Maybe she needs a brownie. "All jokes aside, I'll be here until Saturday, "and I'm already fantasizing about smoking a joint. "with my old man. "But for now, let's have him ride this out first. "I wouldn't have handled this the way I did. "without your comments. "Reddit, you saved me today. "Legends.". Wow.

- Yay. - Yay. Happy story. - One comment. "This must be the most wholesome story I've read this year.". - Yep. - Yeah. Pretty solid. - [Tommy] That's great. - That's the best outcome of that one. - The best one. - Yeah, I'm sad that it's like the grandma's not in on it. Like, that's kind of sad. that it's like she probably wouldn't care. Like, just that it's like, it's just like sad. I'm just like, oh, like you're old, and like you have, you can't... - Yeah. - [Shayne] Talk to your partner about that. - And now you're keeping it from her. - Yeah. She can't party. (Tommy laughs).

- She can't hang. - She can't hang, dude. - She can't hang. Grammy can't hang. Wow. Good job for them. Good. Yay. - [Shayne] There you go. - That was a yay. - There you go. That was a good one. Man. - Wow. - Who was the highest out of them all? The mushroom guy. - The mushroom guy. - Mushroom guy was unbelievably gone. - Those cats had it out for him though. - Oh, those cats knew what was going on. - [Chanse] Yeah. - What if he woke up and he is like, "And I remembered I don't have cats.". - Oh my god. And the wife is just like, "One. "Two." - Two.

Three. - Three. - Oh man. Well, this was fun. - This was great. So much fun. - It's a great time. Yeah. - There's so many plants all around us. - I know. All these real plants. - Am I real? - Chanse, of course you're real. (everyone laughs). Thanks for watching "Culinary Crimes.". (everyone laughs).

No, thank you guys for being here. Hey, happy 4/20 for those who recognize it. I hope you're having a good time watching this. I think a lot of people watch this in the morning, so... - Oh. - I guess if you wake and bake. - Yeah. - It's 4/20, baby. - Yeah, do it. - Yeah. Oh. (everyone laughs). - What was that? - What was that? - What was that? - James. - But thank you guys for watching. As always, let us know what subreddits. and themes you want us to cover on this show.

And you know what? Have a good time, and we'll see you a week from now, next Saturday. Goodbye. - Go drink some water. - Drink water. Make sure to hydrate. - Make nachos, but use Doritos as the chips. - [Shayne] Ooh. - [Tommy] Smart. - Whoa. Hot dogs and grilled cheese. (everyone laughs).