Relationships Gone Wrong | Reading Reddit Stories

- We have compiled more absolutely unhinged Reddit stories. Today's theme, I guess, it's a lot of relationship stuff. If you're single after hearing these, you're probably gonna feel better about your situation. 'cause these are nightmare fuel. Today I'm joined by Courtney and Angela. (Courtney giggles). - Snagu. (crew laughs). - Courtney, I know you're never on Reddit. Angela, are you ever on Reddit? - Nope. - Have you ever frequented the site?

- No, I've been on Reddit in middle school. - Whoa, is that a roast? - [Shayne] Okay, wow. (everyone laughs). - I think it's just, it got crazier. - When people say they're not on Reddit, I don't rush to be like, you should get on Reddit. No, stay away. - Yeah. - I know, it was quiet. - I was a Tumblr girl. - Yes, me too. - Let's get into our first story. - Yeah. - "Am I the asshole. "for bringing my girlfriend a cutting board to her bed. "when she was sick so she could still help making dinner?". (crew laughs). Moving on.

(everyone laughs). "My girlfriend was not feeling well. "She said to me that she was going to eat some soup. "but was not feeling like cooking together. "Normally we go to the store and cook together every night. "We both like to. "I was looking forward to cooking together, "so I asked her to try to go to the grocery store with me. "so we could buy the ingredients. "She told me that she was not feeling well, "but eventually went with me. "after I told her I would make the dinner. "When we got home, "I asked her if she wanted to cook with me. "She told me she could try. "After 10 minutes she stopped. "and told me she was not doing okay and went to the bedroom.

"I was making dinner in the kitchen alone. "She was in bed, "so I thought maybe she could still help from her bed. "So I brought her the cutting board, a knife, "and a bell pepper to cut. "She told me that she was not feeling well. "and was not able to help with preparing dinner. "and that she did not feel like eating. "I told her, 'But you still need something to eat, right? "'That's good for you.'. "Edit, I maybe have a hard time relating. "It was a long time ago when I was sick myself.

"When I was 10 was the last time, "so I do not really remember how it felt. "If I have a headache myself, I still try to cook. "So maybe I handled it wrong, "but I thought in this way we can still. "kind of cook together.". He keeps saying that. - "Can we cook together?". - "You know, I did this so we could cook together, "and then I did that so we could cook together.". - It's so weird. - This is (beep) crazy. (everyone laughs). - It's like a golden retriever. that just keeps (beep) bringing the tennis ball back.

(everyone laughs). Like, stop. I can't anymore. - Yeah, like how sick does someone have to be. for him to be like, "All right, fine, you don't have to cook.". She was in bed. - She tried too. - That's what made me like so emotional listening to this is. that like she tried to go the grocery store. and she couldn't. - She did it all. - I wanna, I just keep picturing her like unable to walk. (everyone laughs). - She's got the blanket on, she's like, trying to help in the grocery store.

- Also the worst task you could give her, give her a knife and a cutting board. and just set it on her stomach. - Yeah, what the (beep) is that? (Shayne laughs). - This (beep) guy. - [Shayne] Yeah. - Yeah, that's a lot. - Do you think he was coming from a bad place. 'cause at least, I'm not defending him, but at least this wasn't a situation of like, 'cause so many stories we read are like, "Oh, she's supposed to cook for me.". - Yeah. - But this is him being like, "This is the thing we do together. "Oh, let's do it together.". - [Courtney] Right. - I think he just has a weird, he's just not recognizing.

that this is weird. - I just don't think. he's getting it. - [Shayne] No. - It unfortunately just sounds. like he just wasn't getting it, and it's not like he didn't wanna cook. It's that he wanted to cook together. And like she really tried. She like, she said she couldn't go to the grocery store. He told her that he would cook for her. if she went to the store with him. - That's true. - So he lied. - He did lie. - And he tried to make her cook with him anyway. - And I feel like if your argument is correct, Shayne, and he just wanted to do it with her together, he'd get in bed too with the cutting board.

- [Courtney] Yeah. - 'Cause they would be together. But that's bull (beep) - And a hotplate. But that's so weird. Okay, imagine she's not feeling well. and she needs some soup, so they're gonna cook this soup together, and he's like, "Well, you need this soup to feel better. "You need to help me cook it.". Imagine if you were sick with something more serious. and needed medicine. And he's like, "Well?". - "We have to go make the medicine.". - Like, you're holding her medicine hostage. - He did say, "She went with me.

"after I told her I would make the dinner.". So he did lie. That is a clear cut you're the asshole. Comments in this are like, "You're the asshole. "Is this even real? "If she needs something to eat that's good for her, "then bring the already prepped and cooked food to her. "Not make her work in bed while sick. "What the (beep)". The other comment was, "Dude, dude, you're the asshole.". (Courtney laughs). Next story. "Am I the asshole for getting an impulsive tattoo. "against my wife's wishes?". Before we get into it, I feel like if your partner wants to get a tattoo,

that's their body. Like, they get to do it. Like, you could be like, "Hey, like I don't know if it's gonna be a good tattoo. "I think that's a dumb tattoo, "but you're allowed to get it.". - But are they saying that it's-. - I'm going before we get into the story. - Okay, 'cause it's loaded. To me that's loaded. - [Shayne] Oh, totally. - No, I think we have a lot of layers. - I like to sometimes predict and then be horribly wrong. "As silly as it sounds, "I, a 28-year-old man, "went through a pretty traumatic experience.

"when my best friend moved away two months ago. "He and I had been friends since our early teen years. "and now we're both in our late 20s. "It very much felt. "like a security blanket getting ripped away from me. "and caused me to confront some intense feelings. "He and I are still close friends, "but with differing timezones, "the stress of moving and getting settled in, "and adjusting to a career change, "our communication has been limited compared to what it was. "My wife helped me through the transition. "as best as she could, "but her patience with the process ran thin rather quickly. "This came to a head this weekend.

"During a weekend trip with some different local friends, "I got a somewhat impulsive tattoo. "It was a design I had been considering for a while, "but I got it done in spur of the moment yesterday. "I felt like it was a necessary part of my grieving process. "of what I thought my life was going. "to look like moving forward. "When I came home with it tonight, "my wife was incredibly angry. "The tattoo has a clear connection to my friend, "and my wife said it was ridiculous. "I was taking things so hard. "I told her it didn't feel good. "having her invalidate my feelings.

"and that art on my body was my business alone. "I don't have any tattoos dedicated to her, "so in a moment of anger accused her of being petty. "over the fact. "She scoffed, left our home, and we haven't spoken since. "Am I the asshole?". - I have a lot to say. I feel like this is not asking, "Am I the asshole 'cause I got the tattoo.". I think it's, "Am I the asshole. "'cause I'm in love with my friend and I won't realize it?". (Courtney laughs). - Yeah, this is... - "And I'm making my wife think. "that this is about a tattoo.".

When really she's freaking out because she's like, "You're losing your mind over the loss of your friend.". - He moved, but he's talking-. - But it sounds like a loss to him. - He's saying grieving. Like, "I'm grieving the loss of my friend. "I only can get Chad's messages in the morning.". - "We used to kiss each other good night.". - No, this girl is freaking out, and she should be. 28 years old to early teens, that's just like 28 to like 13? - 15 years max. But like, yeah, it's like, "Bro, I'll message him,

"'did you see the game last night?'. "And I don't hear for like 15 hours. "It's (beep) hard, man.". - God. Yeah, I will say I was anticipating this. to be a tattoo like about her. - [Angela] Me too, me too. - Yeah, and so I was like, "Ooh, yeah, that's kind of weird. "But still it is their body.". This situation, it's like, sure, this guy's dramatic, but there's no reason for this girlfriend. to be mad about a tattoo.

Sounds like it's more than just the tattoo. - [Kiana] It's his wife. - Oh, wife, wife, wife, wife. Just sub this in. Wife. (everyone laughs). - Wife. - Wife. The writer has some more added. "I answered this in a comment, "but I figured it was relevant to add here. "The tattoo is just under the bend of my elbow. "on my right arm. "It's a zodiac sign constellation tattoo. "with 'maybe when I'm older' written beneath it, "hence the chosen username here.". Oh, I guess it's... "Which are lyrics to a song I've had.

"on repeat the last couple months.". So there's some comments and people are saying, "Had to look up the lyrics and yikes.". (Angela laughs). "Wow, yeah. "That's definitely not a platonic bro relationship.". - Yo! - "I was almost trying to justify it. "I've tattooed people who get something with their friend. "or for them. "But after I read these lyrics, "yeah, there's definitely something much more. "to their friendship.". The song is called "When I'm Older" by Ash. Lyrics are here.

Let's see. "Maybe when I'm older. "Payphone calls, cigarettes, injuries, shower sex. "I was holding on for dear life. "Complicated, understated, on the way to devastated. "We were young and out of our minds. "Right now I'm sorry. "Burns through me darling, "but I can't help think in 30 years it won't. "So maybe when I'm older, maybe when I'm older, "I'll run out of stories about you. "Yeah, maybe when I'm older, maybe when I'm older, "I'll know what it's like not to love you anymore. "Maybe when I-". - 'Cause you're in a different timezone. (everyone laughs).

- "Playing house, immature, picking out furniture, "praying that our hearts would play fair. "Emotional souvenirs, fleeting moments, golden years. "Close my eyes and I go back there.". - Okay! - I go back there! - I think we get the idea. - And if there's a zodiac involved that's gay as hell. (everyone laughs). Sorry, I'm sorry. - No, that's so funny. - Chanse's eyes (mimics buzz) right at me. - I will say I defended this guy at the top.

I don't feel bad for that. I don't even know if I necessarily think he's an asshole. I think he just needs to address some stuff. I think he needs to be honest with her. I think he maybe needs to go to therapy and be like, hey, are you maybe in love with someone else. and you need to like... - Yeah. - Shift around your life a little bit. - He's definitely on a journey. I think for anybody to get mad at a tattoo. on another person that has nothing to do with them,

it's weird. If she was jealous, still weird. Funny that he called her out like, "You're just jealous of my bro!". - Yeah. - I think if she wasn't, I think if she wasn't worried about there being. other connections there, I don't think she would be bothered. if he got a tattoo of like his friend. I think there's a different, I think she, there's already like a consensus. amongst the two of them. that it's like this is more than a friendship. - Yeah, I feel like the only way this guy is an asshole is.

if she is clearly saying. that what makes her mad isn't the tattoo. but is this inappropriate relationship. And if she said that, then this makes him an asshole. But I don't know if she said that. And I think this guy's just confused as (beep). - Have you guys ever had friendships. that span different timezones? Like, have you been friends with someone. and then they moved away, and like a long distance friendship and it's turned to that? Like, has that ever happened? - One of my best friends moved to New York, and I remember being super bummed about it. Didn't think about the hour difference in like calling her,

but I got over it in like an hour. (everyone laughs). But I remember being super bummed, being like, "Oh my god, this changes us forever.". But then getting over it. - I think I can't help but feel like in this day and age. when I have like a friend move somewhere, I'm like, "All right, well, like I'll still, "like we're gonna have constant communication.". Even if you're literally on a complete opposite timezone. I'm like, they're just, it's nonstop messaging. I have a friend who lives in Prague and I've continued like,

it's not like it's, I still-. - Show us the tat. (everyone laughs). - Yeah, so anyways (laughs). - I hope he figures it out. I hope this guy figures it out. - I know. A part of me almost feels, a part of me feels bad that it's like, dude, if you're really in love with someone. and you're not allowing yourself to be honest about that, then like that sucks. - He's like, "This is about the tattoo. "This is about the tattoo.". It's like no. - No, you're in love, bro. - I think they both know it. Okay, moving on. - Classic. - "My girlfriend almost broke up with me.

"over the Christmas gift I got for her, in parenthesis, "Spanx.". (Courtney gasps). - Here we go! (Courtney laughs). - This is from the subreddit True Off My Chest, which is a place for confessions to be made. This person says, "The irony is that this made a good gift for a friend. "She was the one that recommended this gift. "to my girlfriend. "My girlfriend complains a lot. "about not looking good in outfits. "I figured this would help her. "Nope, I was dead wrong. "My girlfriend didn't appreciate it at all, "and she nearly broke up with me over it.

"I honestly don't like giving gifts. "because it isn't the first time. "that a person I've given a gift to didn't like it, "even if they don't say it outright.". For people who don't know, Spanx are a type of like, it's like a lining that like... - It's like body contour, shape wear. - Yeah, it brings it all in. - Tightens some areas. - Brings it all, it just really brings it all in. - Sucks ya in. - So I could definitely see. why someone would be offended by this. You're kind of critiquing their body by giving it to 'em.

- Yeah, it's like how Damien says he has somebody. who gets them soap every year. Not even fancy soap, just like a two pack of Dove. (Shayne and crew laugh). - It's like-. - Oh my god! - It's like, "Buddy, what are you saying?". - Exactly. - What's going on? Yeah, I think this is on that friend, the friend that recommended this-. - [Courtney] Yeah, what is that? - It is on (beep) Rebecca or whoever it is. - I can only, we have nothing to build off of, but I'm like, damn, was that some like (beep) up (beep). of like, "Hey, what should I get for my girlfriend?". "Hmm, you should get her Spanx.". - "Get her Spanx, she would love that.".

- Or maybe she said like, "Oh, she wanted this thing,". and then that's when the guy goes, "But Rebecca said you wanted it! "Rebecca, tell 'em!". - Yeah, like maybe that's a gift. that she would've appreciated from like a friend. who she's confided in. Like, they talk and they're like close that way. Getting that gift. from your partner? - A close friend. - So rereading this, "My girlfriend complains a lot. "about not looking good in outfits.". - [Courtney] Right. - And then he got her Spanx. That's a bad way to "yes, and.". (everyone laughs). That's a bad way to be like, "I agree.".

- Yeah. Yeah, we glazed over that sentence, but that's tough. - No, that's... - No, that's a confirming an anxiety right there. that you don't need to confirm. - [Shayne] That's not good. - Yeah, so he didn't buy this 'cause her friend was like, "You should get these for him.". He bought these because he thinks she has a problem. with her body image. - What would you do if you guys had a partner. who said that they were insecure about their body. and then a gift was coming up? - I certainly would not buy,

I just don't think any sort of gift like Spanx. or any sort of like, any sort of thing that is meant to hide. or cover up anything someone would be insecure about. I think is a bad gift. Unless they literally told you like, "Man, I really, give me Spanx for Christmas.". Like, unless someone says that, that's a bad category. - Like, said it to you. - Yeah. - I think that's a really bad category. - Especially Spanx. I feel like now like shapewear's getting like really cute. and you could like accessorize with it,

and that might be like cool, like (beep) skims or something. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - But like Spanx is just like plastic, like a bag, you know? It's just like, it's underwear. It's like... - If someone bought me lifts for my birthday, I'd be like, damn, dude. - That's (beep) dude. - Like, it's somehow worse than someone just being like, "You're (beep) short, loser.". I'd be like, "Okay cool.". But if they bought me-. - Don't help me fix. - Don't (beep) do that. - Yeah. I got insecure this Christmas. 'cause I was gonna give one of my friends this.

just like body positivity book that I loved, and I was like, I don't wanna tell her she's got issues. - Yeah, it's tough. - But I also like love her and know her, but I was like, I'm not giving her this book. - Right, I think that's fair. - It's tough. Unless I literally have a discussion with someone, even like something like a self-help book, if it's like something that helped me a ton, and I'm like, oh, this did so much for me. But I'm like, it can be read so many different ways. - Like, a podcast where it's like, listen to this. - Like, this will help you with your, with, you know, your thing. Like, you don't wanna do that.

That's my personal opinion. Like I said, it's based on discussions you've had. - [Angela] Yeah. - Comments in this are definitely like, "Yikes. "Did you tell your girlfriend about the girl. "who recommended them? "Because that would be hard to come back from.". Someone said, "Oh son, sigh.". (Courtney laughs). "Your friend 100% set you up. "That's a gift that can easily read as an insult.". Has anyone gotten a horrible gift from a significant other? - They claimed this was a gift on Valentine's Day. or like some gift that they got a haircut.

(crew laughs). - "Babe, just for you today I wiped my ass.". (everyone laughs). - "Happy Valentine's Day. "I cleaned my asshole.". (everyone laughs). - Literally did. - Oh my god. - That's crazy. - Was it a haircut that this person like didn't want. but you wanted? - I didn't ask for any of it. - Boy, what a way to give gifts is.

to just hold someone hostage in a way and be like, "I'm not gonna cut my hair. "Okay fine, for your birthday I'll cut my hair.". (everyone laughs). You don't have to buy anything. - One day a year you get what you want. - That's what I got. What about you, anything? - My mother gave me white strips this year for Christmas. - Okay. - [Shayne] Yeah. - And that's on her! - Why are men so confused? - That's what's so freaking annoying about this is. that it's just like, "blame it on ignorance.". - You know why I think cutting board guy, they're all confused, but cutting board guy's more insane.

because I will say the only defense is. that this guy genuinely asked one of her friends. and she said, "Oh, get her Spanx.". And I think guys, most guys are dumb enough to be like, "Oh, well her friend recommended that, "so I'm gonna get that.". - [Angela] Yeah. - Yeah. - She said apples, I bought apples. - And he's like, "I don't understand women. "What's a Spanx? "She wants to get spanked? "Okay.". (everyone laughs). - "Oh, multiple spanks? "Okay.". Let's buckle up. I think we might have a new king of the assholes here. This is from relationship advice. - [Courtney] Okay, here we go. - "Found out my best friend, a 25-year-old woman,

"has been using my pictures, 26-year-old woman, "to catfish a guy she's been talking to since 2015.". This was posted in 2020, so five years. "Man, I don't know where to go from here, "so I thought I'd go to Reddit.". - Good idea! - On year five, I open Reddit. - On year five, I discovered Reddit. "My best friend, we'll call her Maggie, "and I met our freshman year of college. "We are now roommates and moved in together two years ago.

"In 2015, my best friend spent spring break. "a couple states away and matched with a guy on Tinder. "When she came back to campus, "she immediately told me about him and how amazing he was. "and how they only went out to dinner once. "Edit, this was obviously a lie. "But that they were talking 24/7. "I got super excited and asked to see a pic. "That was the only picture of him she's ever shown me. "Over the past five years, "he's literally been her whole world. "She talks about him constantly. "She always has her nose in her phone. "She gets clingy when he takes too long to text back.

"She cried to me a few times. "because she's lurked on his social media. "and seen he was around other girls. "My roommate doesn't have social media herself. "I had asked her a few times. "why they have never met up again, "and she said they're both too busy. "and don't have the money for the trip. "I even told her that he could stay with us. "and that would save some money. "He sent presents. "and even flowers on Valentine's Day every year.". - Whoa. - "They've basically been dating this whole time. "So yesterday my roommate picked up a shift at work. "and was gone. "I get a knock on our door and open it to a guy.

"He says, 'Hi,' and I give a confused, 'Hi?'. "And then he barges in and scoops me up into a hug.". (Courtney gasps). - I hope they (beep). (crew laughs). I hope they (beep). (Courtney hyperventilates). - "He starts saying, 'I thought you were working? "'I was hoping your roommate was here. "'so I could surprise you when you got back.'. "And I am so confused. "I immediately get down and back away. "and let him know I have absolutely no clue. "what he's talking about. "My brain can't even process what's happening.

"Then he looks confused and says, 'Maggie?'. "And I'm like, 'No, that's my roommate?'. "My roommate and I look nothing alike, "so I'm even more confused. "Then something kind of clicks and I think, "oh my god, is this the guy she's been dating? "So I say, 'Wait, are you Adam?'. "And he gives me a very slow, 'Yes?'". (Courtney groans). "And I get excited and say, "'Oh my god, I bet Maggie is going to flip out. "'I can't believe you're here.'. "His demeanor completely changes.

"He asked me what I'm talking about. "I'm Maggie? "And I tell him, 'No, I'm Summer, Maggie's roommate.'. "At this point, I'm still completely missing something. "he has just pieced together. "He just says slowly, 'Holy (beep)'. "and looks like he doesn't know what to say. "Eventually he asks if he can sit down. "I invite him in. "He then proceeds to tell me. "for the past five years he thought he's been talking to me. "Every picture he's ever seen of Maggie has. "actually been pictures of me. "I'm completely dumbfounded,

"and we don't know what to say to each other at first.". - And then they kiss. - And then they make out. (crew laughs). - "So he gets out his phone and shows me proof. "He has tons of pictures of me saved on his phone". (Courtney shrieks). "And went to their messages and showed me proof. "that she's been sending them to him. "I felt and still feel completely sick to my stomach. "I get out my phone and show him real pictures of her. "I tell him maybe they could just talk. "when she gets off of work, "and he's really pissed at this point.". - Oh. - "I say, 'Maybe we should call her first. "'and let her know he's here.'.

"So I do that and she starts flipping out, "saying she's not coming home. "Tells him to leave and that she won't talk to him. "He calls her and starts yelling at her over the phone. "After everyone calms, she eventually comes home. "He's hurt and accusing, she's crying. "I'm sitting there awkwardly.". (Courtney yells). - Dude. - "She tells him that she's still the same person. "he's had feelings for, and he screams at her, "'No, I thought I was in love with your roommate,'. "and that completely makes her break down. "So I tell him maybe he should leave for the night.

"and everyone should have their own space. "He agrees, "and after he leaves she goes completely psychotic on me. "and starts throwing (beep) around the living room.". - Ooh. - "Tells me she hates me. "I start crying. "It's a mess. "I left to stay with a friend and haven't been back, "so I don't know what's gone down. "I feel like I have no idea. "who the person I'm living with is, "and I feel weirdly violated.". - Yeah. - Yeah. "Do I move out? "Do I try to call her? "She hasn't even texted me. "I don't know how to deal with this situation.".

So thoughts? (everyone laughs). - This situation is feral. and the best romance novel I've ever read. - Catfishing has to be one of the most fascinating things. - [Courtney] Yeah. - Ever. - I think it goes so deep. - It is so fascinating to me. And especially when it goes on that long. - Five years. I cannot imagine that moment, like this guy opening the door. Also, I wonder if he was cute. (Shayne and crew laugh). But like that is so jarring. that she is literally an innocent bystander.

in this entire thing, but she's somehow at the heart of this roommate's problems. - Yeah, meanwhile cut to, "Welcome to Dairy Queen,". she's just at work. - Yeah, she's just chilling. Oof. - Would you... Say you were dating someone online. who you never met in person. but you just really clicked in every kind of way. and the conversations were incredible and all this stuff, and then you met them and you found out. that they were catfishing you, is there any hope of it,

of like you even trying to make it work? - It's a big, it's like you guys are saying, it goes deep. Like, that is huge. You are lying about who you are. Five years. - That's five years. Certainly five years, no. - It's so personal. I think it even goes back to like. that person's relationship to lying and truth, 'cause some people it will just like you're done. Like, you can't do that. - Yeah, to me it's lying.

- No matter what it's bad. It's just like, each person, it just rips apart in their own unique way, 'cause it's just like such deception like at you. - Yeah, and I don't know, like we don't know if this roommate just used a picture. They could have been lying about other things. We don't know what they were honest about. 'Cause like yeah, if it's just what they look like, it's like "Love is Blind,". like, but it's not about what this person looks like. It's not that shallow. It's this person lied. - He didn't use her name.

He like, he-. - She used her own name and just the picture. - Oh, good for her. - Said she had a roommate named-. - You're right, she probably was lying about other things. - No, for sure. And I also, okay, I get insecure about taking people's pictures. I get insecure when my friend at the same meal as mine, we're at the same meal, she takes a cuter picture of the food than I did and I say, "Can you send me that so I can post it?". (Courtney laughs). I think I'm a liar 'cause I didn't take that. Could you imagine! (Courtney laughs). The levels. - Oh my god. The levels.

- Who do you think was more wronged in this situation? Him or her? Like, 'cause a part of me kind of thinks the friend, like she used all her photos, like that's so insane. Like, she was in a way catfishing her friend too. - I think he's the more-. - [Shayne] You think he was more wronged? - [Courtney] I think so too. - Like, he lost five years of his life romantically too. Like, she, the girl whose pics were used, like of course her mind's (beep) blown, but she'll go away like having her own romantic life. and her own job that didn't get like affected by this.

- And it's not like this roommate was like, "Hey Summer, do you have any like sexy nudey pics. "that I could just borrow for a second?". - I hope to God she didn't. - Like, it's not like she had access to that. So it's not like it was inappropriate pictures were used. It was just like regular pictures were used. She literally could have never known. that this was happening. Meanwhile, this guy is building this bond with a person, like you said, like full on. Like, but it sucks. She's dealing with the aftermath now.

So she's being hurt in that way. Like, that sucks. - Yeah, there's some comments here. "I was the Adam in a situation like this. "It was three years. "You need to move out. "Get away from this Maggie. "People like that are not okay. "Don't put yourself through this anymore. "I went no contact when it happened, effective immediately. "My Maggie messed with me for years to come. "and we were countries apart. "Just get away and stay away. "That's all I have to say.". - Whoa. - But the time difference. (Courtney laughs). - The time difference.

Someone else said, "Holy (beep) you need to get outta there ASAP. "Even after catching her in this, "she's telling you she hates you? "She has some serious issues she needs to deal with.". - Yeah, there's some envy there. - "And you don't need to be around for that.". There's an update. Do you want me to read the update? (Courtney gasps). - [Kiana] Yeah. - Hold on. - Season two! - We have an update. Season two of Maggie. Maggie's the king of the assholes right now. - Yes. - "Update, thank you guys for all your advice and comments. "Many saying you've been in mine or Adam's position. "It's made me feel better. "I'm gonna go ahead and just post an update. "because I don't think there will be more of an outcome.

"than this. "I ended up having a phone call with Adam, "mostly because I wanted to know about pictures she sent. "Turns out she sent pics of me in my underwear. "and nudes that aren't actually of me or her. "So we're assuming she got those from Google. "He feels really bad. "and is actually having a hard time with all of this.". Really? "I assured him I don't blame him at all. "for the underwear pics or anything like that. "He ended up telling me that they actually have FaceTimed. "but she would never show her face, "only the top of her head/hair, "which is dyed a similar color to mine.

"Never thought anything of this. "Now I think it might be really weird.". - Okay, that's the most impressive part. (Courtney mock vomits). That's just so impressive to have a FaceTime. and only show your forehead. - [Shayne] Yeah, what the fuck? (Courtney laughs). "And her excuse was she felt like she looked bad on video, "was self-conscious, didn't have makeup on, et cetera. "He said he didn't think it was weird. "I don't know. "He also told me he's tried a ton of times. "to arrange visits to meet. "and she's came up with excuses every time. "Said that he's been mostly content to talk through text,

"over the phone up until this point. "Also said he's going to try to reach out. "to her one more time to talk about everything. "but that he's moving on. "As for me, I'm not sure I can break my lease yet, "but I'm going to go ahead and move out. "and with a friend until my lease is over. "We briefly talked when I went to my apartment. "and she sort of half apologized. "but is still pretty hostile and defensive. "So I'm gonna give her space. "I feel bad for her, "but I don't think our friendship is going. "to survive this whole thing. "Anyway, this has been some crazy (beep). "and I appreciate all of the responses I got. "Y'all are awesome.".

Oh my god. - Wow. - Holy (beep). - Summer was really nice to Maggie, and I would not have been that nice to Maggie. - Oh, I would've been like, "We are not friends anymore.". - "You suck!". But she's being very empathetic, is like, "I feel bad for her.". Like, clearly this person like, with the FaceTiming? The nudes thing is (beep) up. - That's just-. - That's (beep). - Can I say something so toxic? - [Courtney] Yeah. - [Shayne] Yeah, dude. - Yeah. Would a part of you be flattered? (Courtney laughs).

- Chanse, yes. - Okay, like think about, you must look good all the time if you're Summer or, I forgot which one-. - Summer. Summer's the one who's-. - [Courtney] Summer's the perp. - Like, do you move on from two years from then. and you do all the journaling and the therapy you can, and then look back on it and be like, "Wow, someone thinks I'm gorgeous.". (everyone laughs). - I'm sure that there's like a drive by, back of the head thought of that. I can't believe a half-assed apology.

and still being hostile. Summer was existing. She didn't even seek out Adam. Adam showed up literally to her doorstep. and walked in and scooped her, like this all fell into her lap. How can you be mad at someone for being around? Maggie, I hope you're better now. Like, that's some low, that sucks. - That's tough. Look, it does have to be awful. Like, the mindset you have to be in to do that. - For five years.

- Rough. - Gosh, and to put you in that situation to talk to Adam. You know what I mean? - Every day. - My only thought on Adam though is I'm like, if you FaceTime with someone for five years. and they never show their face... Okay, here's our next one. Let's see if Maggie gets surpassed. "Am I the asshole for telling my wife she overreacted. "over a joke I told at our wedding?". - Yes. - So this was posted on two different subreddits. First it was on Am I The Asshole, and then it was later on Am I The Devil. Am I The Devil is where the worst people.

from Am I The Asshole end up. They curate the just gems from Am I The Asshole. and put 'em on Am I The Devil. - Okay. - So this guy might, he might be something. "My now wife and I got married days ago. "I gotta say that I have a thing for comedy.". (everyone laughs). Moving on. He's the asshole. - Gotta say I've got a thing for comedy.

- You know, I gotta say-. - I got a thing for comedy. - I gotta say. (everyone laughs). - Oh, we're having fun. - Anyways, I wore a ball and chain to the altar. (everyone laughs). And she got offended by it. "I like to tell random jokes at random times.". - So random! - "I intended on telling a joke at the wedding, "but my wife got worked up, "saying she didn't feel comfortable with it. "I told her it wouldn't be one of those dark ones.

"that we enjoy in private.". (crew laughs). (Courtney groans and laughs). - [Courtney] What? - I'm having such a good time. - "The wedding took place and after saying our vows, "I jokingly said, 'Til dishes do us part.'". (crew laughs). Sorry, let me say that again. - [Courtney] Hold on, my guy. - "After saying our vows, I jokingly said, "'Til dishes do us apart,'.

"instead of 'Til death do us apart.'. "Now the guests found this funny. "My wife, however, went off on me afterwards. "and started yelling about how I went out of line. "with this joke and said that I embarrassed her. "and made our start of our marriage look like a joke. "I told her she overreacted over a joke, "but she got more angry. "and started giving me the silent treatment, "though she's occasionally saying I ruined the marriage. "since my family are now running with the joke.". (Courtney and Angela gasp). - Does the family have merch?

- Is the family about comedy? (Shayne laughs). - They all have cigars at all times. They're like, hey. Some comments here. "I have a thing for comedy. "The moment you know this is going to go badly.". (everyone laughs). "You ruined your vows for a stupid non joke, really? "I bet they had one of those cake toppers. "where the groom is trying to get away. "or has a ball and chain.". - Oh my god. - Yeah, it's a good joke. - He hyped it up too. Like, from what I understand, he was like, "I have a joke that I'm gonna tell.".

And she's like, "I don't know.". And he's like, "Don't worry, "it's not one of the dark ones we talk about in private.". - "Don't worry, it's not one of those racist ones I say. "when no one's watching us.". Do you think like weddings are a place for comedy? Like, how would you feel, how would you feel as an attendee at a wedding. if something like that was said during the, I think it's specifically during the ceremony. I feel like the reception is totally. where you can say jokes. Like, that's just, people are gonna get drunk. It's gonna be stupid. Whatever.

But the ceremony. Like, how do you feel about that? - I feel like people's weddings should be like curated. to who this couple is, right? So if they were both on the same page of like, "I'm down for like goofing and gabbing during our ceremony, "like let's have some like funny things.". But at the same time, like you said, the reception's for the funny stuff. Whenever the ceremony happens, it's always like this beautiful thing. and it's about this thing. And then whenever there's like little hiccups. or like a little comment that wasn't planned,

the tension of like this traditional thing like breaks. and laughter is really like awesome. But this guy took the (beep) crumbs of the tray. of like comedy. Like, that was such a-. - It's a bad joke. - Yeah, it's not even a joke. - It's a dumb joke. - Because I think your wedding could be. whatever you want your wedding to be. Like, once I was at a wedding and someone did a monologue. And it wasn't the bride or groom, but it was like a bridesmaid, and it was awful to watch.

(Shayne laughs). But it was like, okay, you guys decided this. But it feels like this just wasn't decided both ways. - Yeah, exactly. - And this person didn't want jokes. - Yeah. My opinion on this is that he was clearly doing this. for himself and for the crowd. And I feel like the ceremony specifically is. for like the two of them. Like, that's for them. And like he really, like he should have thought like,

"Oh, if my wife doesn't want me to do this, "this is about my wife. "Like, this is literally the moment. "that's about the two of us.". But he took a moment to be like, "Hey, everyone-". - A people pleaser. - He wanted that for himself. So you've already kinda said it. I was gonna ask, what's the cringiest thing you've ever seen. or heard at a wedding? - Yeah, the "When Harry Met Sally" monologue. - Oh. - I think that there's plenty of opportunity. to do fun, crazy, cool stunt stuff at the reception.

You know, there's like flash mobs or planned dances, things like that. But we've known people who've been to ceremonies. that had like literal choreographed like comedy bits, like fused into the ceremony and like part of it. - Have you guys seen those brides though. that sing themselves down the aisle? - No. - No. - Now those-. - That's a thing? - It was a big thing in the 80s. And they're like big poofy hair, and they're like, ♪ Amazing grace ♪. - No! I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry.

If that's something you wanna do, that's awesome. - Look, if two people getting married wanna do. whatever the (beep) they want, they can. - [Courtney] Exactly. - They absolutely can. - [Courtney] Exactly. - But if one of them doesn't want to. and the other person does, they're an asshole. - And then you're forcing that person up there. with all that attention to just like take it. - Yeah, they just had to sit there. - She just had to take it. Like, that's so messed up. - And I'm gonna be a little bit real. Let's dissect this joke a little bit, okay? 'Til dishes do us part. Dishes, huh? Why?

Because women are in the kitchen doing dishes? Are dishes the problem? Why are dishes a problem? - Cutting board in bed do us part. - We go right back to cutting board. We go right back to the kitchen. - Right back to cutting board. Right back to the school system. - So this guy did not surpass Maggie. I think he's, is he number two to Maggie? Where does he stand? - Yeah, I mean-. - Maggie to me is-. - [Shayne] I'm trying to remember all of them. - Yeah Maggie goes to me with the cutting board. and the other one because it's just like sad people.

This guy's an asshole. - Yeah, this guy's actually an asshole. - Like, this guy didn't make this joke. out of an insecurity like Maggie did. - She said don't do that, and he's like, "You know what? "I'm gonna do it.". - Yeah, Maggie is an asshole, but she's like so deeply broken, and this man is not broken. He is set free, too free. - There's just a lot of critical thinking. that's not happening. Like, really this one joke was worth like, okay, let's think five minutes of laughter, if it's a killer joke, or years of a happy marriage.

- [Angela] Yeah. - I know. No, he made a bad trade. - Like, quite literally during your ceremony. when you're deciding to become one, you're putting yourself above somebody else. - And I will say like, it's like, it's weird that the family's like keeping it going. and like kind of making her feel like-. - It's just a family of jokesters. - The joke wasn't that bad, I was expecting worse. But like it's also like, that's all the more like it wasn't worth it. - Yeah, the family's the asshole. - The whole family's an asshole. - Some of these make me, like my temperature goes up.

- Truly. - Yeah, oh yeah. So this next one is from relationship advice. Someone's girlfriend, a 29-year-old woman, "broke up with me, a 28-year-old man, "for not consulting her when accepting my med school offer. "The length of our relationship is one and a half years. "How do I reconcile with her?". So here's the scoop, "Me, 28-year-old man, and my girlfriend, 29-year-old woman, "have been together for a year and a half. "in a serious relationship. "She was always saying that she wants for us to get married, "but I was always postponing it. "because I wasn't ready for marriage.

"but perhaps getting engaged. "Recently I got an offer for med school in Ireland. "out of the blue during Christmas, "which I accepted without hesitation. "I've applied to med school in the past. "only to get rejected, "and she was made aware from the beginning. "that I will be moving abroad for med school. "She got mad at me. "for not consulting her about this huge decision. "I only told her after I received an offer and I took it. "I didn't even ask her if she is okay with it. "But over a span of three days, she became distant and cold. "On New Year's Eve she broke up with me.

"on the basis that I am childish, lack communication, "and did not take her input into a major life decision. "I could have asked her and run this decision by, "but as soon as I saw that email, I took the offer. "I should have presented this to her. "in a way that I asked for her input and took it. "I mean, I didn't wanna break up with her. "I love her very much. "So am I the asshole for taking a once in a lifetime offer. "without consulting my girlfriend? "Or is she the asshole for breaking up on New Year's Eve?". (Courtney laughs).

"So what do you think I should do now?". - New Year's Eve, come on. - It's the biggest holiday of the year, Courtney. - Oh my (beep) god. - It's most important day. "What do you think I should do now? "We did discuss getting engaged in the next year. "and working towards a marriage in due time. "After I told her, she pondered the idea of LDR, "but inevitably," a long distance relationship, "but inevitably I dropped the ball. "on the way I communicated this to her.". So at what point, I guess one and a half years. But it's also depending. on the seriousness of a relationship. - [Courtney] Right. - Like, how long into a relationship should.

big life decisions be like required to be made together? - Yeah, I will say since they were talking about marriage. and he was, what was his reason to putting it off? He didn't say? - Let's see. "I was postponing it 'cause I wasn't ready for marriage. "but perhaps getting engaged.". - Yeah, "the perhaps getting engaged,". he's just wanting to please her. But like, so there's a lot of like weird levels to this. In my opinion, I feel like he, I think it would've been a really sweet moment of like,

"Hey, I got accepted.". Like, telling her that, sharing that moment together. And like he doesn't have to say like, "Should I?". He doesn't have to like ask for her permission by any means. Like, that's his future. That's huge. And so for her to, you know, not be able to be a part of that, I understand, like he basically like in her maybe opinion, like ended their relationship right there. because he didn't like consider her feelings. - [Shayne] Yeah.

- She's not entitled to the decision. - [Angela] It's just consideration. - Yeah, like he skipped a couple chapters. - Yeah, it's not like a tattoo on your body. where that's your body and I'm different. It's that we're in a relationship together, so if you go to Dublin then where do I, you know what I mean? It's like it actually is considering the other person. It's not just fully-. - [Kiana] Different timezone, Angela. - Oh! - It's a different timezone. - I didn't think about a different timezone, so maybe I should remind myself. and put a zodiac sign on my body. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sing a song. - Yeah. - I love him putting, "What do I do now?".

Go to Dublin, Jeff! (Courtney laughs). - I think it's very clear that this dude was still. in the mindset of being single, and I think-. - [Courtney] He wasn't ready. - She probably was hurt by that, that it's just like, he's just like, "No, I'm doing this 'cause that's my life.". Like, he's living his life. - [Angela] Yeah. - And I think he probably needed to communicate to her like, "Hey, like no, I'm still prioritizing myself. "over our relationship.". Like, and that's okay, but he needs to communicate that. It sounds like he wasn't communicating. - Yeah, I think him fixating on, "She dumped me on New Year's Eve, bro.". Like, it's stupid.

Like, it's not about that. - I would say that rhetoric makes him an asshole. above all else. - Yeah. And like, you know, if there are some things that drive people apart, I think it's kind of telling. that some things were just not meant to be. Maybe like, maybe that's just how it needed to go. and maybe you guys will find each other later. - Yeah, people said, "Sorry dude, that ship has sailed. "Regardless of either of your motivations, "you made a unilateral decision. "that your relationship would be long distance. "and kind of assumed she'd be willing to wait for you. "for four years, which was a huge assumption. "considering she wants marriage now,

"which probably entails living together. "It sounds like your life goals weren't compatible. "and your communication wasn't great either. "I say take the lessons you learned from this. "into your next relationship. "and congrats on getting into med school.". I think that's exactly what I feel like. - I think it's like literally just consideration in things. that you're a part of are sweet. It's like when you give somebody a ride to a party, and then you assume like, "Do you want a ride home too?". You just checked in. You guys see how these are the exact same situation? - Consideration. (Courtney laughs).

I don't even know where this guy stands in the rankings. It's just kind of such a weird situation. - He's not as bad as the soup guy, I think. - You don't think he's as bad as him? - No, he's worse than the soup guy. It's life decisions. I'm wrong. - Joke guy was pretty, you were saying he's the worst. - I think out of everyone right now-. - You think he's the king of the assholes. - Just because I know what he looks like. and I know what he sounds like. (Angela and Courtney laugh). - Personally, Maggie's still the peak. because that's the most damage. - I think, yeah. It's so hard to be like that isn't the worst. - She like (beep) up two people.

- It is the worst. - But joke guy is the biggest asshole. Maggie's like, that's a mess. - That's what I'm saying. It's just like that person is. just like going through a problem. - This the last one. This comes from Best of Redditor Updates, which is one of my favorite subreddits. It compiles like, so this person, there's gonna be multiple parts to this. - Woo-hoo, I love these. - Okay. "She, 23, stopped talking to me, 24, "after I got demoted in Duolingo.".

(crew laughs). (Angela laughs). Here's the first post. "Me, 24, and Sarah, 23," that's a fake name, "have been hanging out for two months now. "We met in a class we were both taking this semester, "and I was the one that approached her. "after seeing her use Duolingo. "I've been learning French on Duolingo. "since I made some French friends last year, "so it was the perfect conversation starter. "We quickly bonded over learning new languages. "and added each other on Duolingo and other social media.".

- Cute. - "We started hanging out outside just the two of us, "and it felt more than a friendship at times. "She even started learning French, "and I was able to use the flirting lesson. "to make her blush.". (Courtney and Angela mock laugh). - "The last two weeks have been really stressful for me. "because of family reasons. "My mom getting sick and all this school stuff also.". - And my friend moved across town. - And my friend moved and I got a tattoo. "So I did not really have much time for Duolingo. "I got a few messages from Sarah about the friend quest. "and how I am not really doing my part, "but those can be completed on your own,

"so it wasn't such a big issue in my eyes. "Two days ago I dropped from the obsidian league. "because it's really hard to stay in it. "if you don't do enough classes. "And I guess Sarah must have noticed. "because yesterday I got a message from her. "that we should stop talking.". (Courtney gasps). "She told me that I was prioritizing different things. "and basically that our values are incompatible.". (Courtney gasps). "I tried to tell her that I haven't had much time. "and have been really stressed lately, "but she left me on read and removed me from Duolingo. "I don't know what to do.

"I feel like we really bonded and I don't wanna lose her. "or make things weird since we are sharing the class.". So now there's an update. "I got some funny replies in the last thread. "and some stupid ones too. "Some of you were saying to let her be. "and to stop harassing her, "which was pretty funny but also (beep) stupid to me. "since I had only sent one message to her. "after she sent hers. "Moreover, she had the ability to block me, "but she did not.". Okay, I'm starting to think this guy is maybe not good. - Wait, what? I'm so confused. Did I miss something? - I know I don't... - Yeah, goddamn. "Here's what happened a few hours ago.

"She ended up replying to my message with a sad smiley face. "So that was an invitation to send her another message. "because I genuinely wanted to understand. "and get some closure or whatever. "I ended up telling her that I enjoyed my time with her. "and that I perhaps might have even caught feelings. "And although I don't understand why this happened, "I will respect her wishes to stop talking, et cetera. "She ended up replying after 20 minutes, "and she told me the whole story. "Apparently she saw me talking to my female classmates. "in school, plus the past two weeks of me being distant.

"and not being able to give her a lot of time. "made her think I was not interested. "and was spending time with other girls instead. "This was quite a revelation to me, "but I was glad that I got to know the truth. "I ended up explaining what was happening in my life. "I usually don't share personal problems. "because I don't want people to view me through that lens. "She ended up apologizing for how she reacted. "I ended up asking her out on a proper date, "and we'll be having one next weekend. "I told her the thing about Duolingo. "and what I thought had happened. "We had a good laugh over it. "She added me back, so I guess it all got resolved,

"and I am excited for our first date.". So how do we think their first date's gonna go? They should do it just in French. - Je m'appelle. - If I were him, I would not go on a date. I'd be like, if you read into that that hard, then no. - Then, no. If you got mad I talked to other women in class... - Yeah, this is not gonna... - I think both of them need hobbies, need other things to do. - I'm worried that the update's gonna be,

"She saw this post and got mad and we're done.". - That does happen. I've seen that happen a lot. That first date will be strange. - I know. I hope they have like an activity or something to do. because they both-. (Shayne laughs). They both feel like they just like overthink a lot. And I understand that, but... - You think they'll get bored? - Yeah, I think these two overthink a lot, and I think if they had an activity, I think first dates are tricky, and an activity gets people to relax a little bit. and focus on like pottery or something.

- You think pottery is a good first date? - I just think something to do together. instead of just like, "Let's talk and connect.". - Okay, so you're against like those types of first dates? - I'm not against them, but I think two people like this-. - These two need it. - - Need like, let's do something with a common goal. - Okay. - I don't think that this is something. that's gonna last long. If it ended, it was literally so short, ended over values not being the same. - [Angela] Yeah.

- And now they're getting back into it. It's gonna be a roller coaster. They're gonna have a lot of first dates. - It also feels like a lot of drama. before the first date even starts. - [Courtney] Yeah. - Yeah, no. - I'm arguing enough in my own head before a first date. - Yeah. - Like, I've canceled so many first dates. because I was too nervous. Not even like red flags about the guy. Yeah, 'cause I'm just too scared. And literally one of my first first dates ever, it was because I was trying to cancel, and it was too late, he was already outside.

So I had to go. - Okay, I feel like there's a lot to discuss here. in regards to first dates, so maybe we'll do that. some other time. - [Courtney] We'll talk. - All right, well this has been. more unhinged Reddit stories. I hope you enjoyed it. - So unhinged. - Yeah, how do you feel? - I need to check my heart rate. - Truly, that was crazy. I just hope everyone just is kind to one another. - It really, like relationships, successful or not, a lot of it is each other being in each other's.

like splash zone of our own issues. You know? - Yeah, it's a good way to put it. - It's so much of that. We're all just in each other's splash zones. Watch out. I have problems. - Get the cutting board outta the bedroom! - No cutting boards in the bedroom. - Unless you're doing something freaky with it. - Unless it's kinky (beep). - Well, I love doing this. Let me know who should join me next time. And please send me Reddit stories, send 'em to the Smosh Twitter. Post 'em on the Smosh Reddit.

Wherever you want. All right, well 'til dishes do us apart. - (beep) off. (Courtney laughs). - Bye. - Bye!