Nightmare Vacation Stories | Reading Reddit Stories

- Welcome back to "Reddit Stories". I'm Shayne. And today's theme is all about summer and vacation. if you couldn't tell from the set decor. My guests today are Ian and Courtney. - And we love vacation! - Three people who love vacation. - I brought my vacation shirt. - Okay. - Oh, you got a vacation chain too. - Got my vacation chain. - Gold chain. - Got my vacation pants. No, these are just regular pants. - Okay. - Can't believe you lied.

I look like I'm dressed for the fall. - Yeah. - [Shayne] Yeah. - Well, vacation in the northeast. You're gonna go see all the colors. - Yeah, but I love a tropical vacation. because a productive tropical day is laying. - Yeah. - [Ian] Laying. - The less you do, the more successful that vacation is. - Exactly. - All right, well these all revolve around summertime. or vacation stuff. A lot of varying things. But it will get wild, so get ready. Let's get into our first story here.

- Let's fricking, let's fricking, let's fricking... - Let's fricking ride this wave. - Ha ha! Yeah! - This story, this first one comes from Legal Advice. This person writes in, "I accidentally spent the night in a stranger's house. "I mixed up the address. "Should I go ahead and report this to the police/homeowners. "or say nothing?". (Ian laughs). Okay. - Huh? - So they slept in a stranger's house. Should they report it? Should they self-report? "I'm a college student returning home for the summer break.

"I go to school several states away. "and was making the 20 plus hour drive home. "to South Florida. "I spent all day driving and was tired. "and didn't wanna spend money on a hotel. "if I didn't have to. "I called up one of my sorority sisters. "who lives in the Florida panhandle. "and asked if I could stay the night with her. "Sorority sister says she's out of town, "but gives me her address. "and tells me that I can crash at her family's beach house. "She gives me the specific instructions. "to enter through the kitchen window. "since there is no spare key. "and she leaves the kitchen window unlocked.

"I'm very good friends with my sorority sister. "and know her family, so I didn't think anything of it. "I drove to the beach house. "and entered through the kitchen window. "It was very late, "and I fell asleep on the couch without using the bathroom. "or looking around or anything like that. "The next morning I woke up. "and realized that I was not in the right house. "because I didn't recognize anyone in the photos hanging up. "I cleaned up the couch and left as quickly as possible. "and was able to figure out that I went to the house. "across the street from my friend's beach house.

"I did not intend to break into this house, "and I'm worried now that I'll be reported to the police. "or something. "The house had security cameras, "but I have no clue if they were turned on or not. "Do you think I should go to the police. "and let them know about the mix-up?". - Oh my goodness. - That's awesome. - That is really funny. - That's so good. And I think like what she should have done. is once she realized she was in the wrong house, just rearrange everything in the house just slightly. - Yeah.

- Just so that when the people come back to the house, they feel a little bit crazy. - Just a little freaked out. - [Ian] Yeah. - But you're saying that there's security cameras, right, so there's definitely footage of her going in? - Well, she said she saw security cameras, so that could be a situation. where they have security cameras, but they may not look at the footage all the time. I don't know. - I feel like if I was in this situation, I would immediately tell my friend, because, sister, listen to what happened to me. But also, and then being like, "Hey, do you know if we could contact this house?".

Like, 'cause like they don't need. to get the police involved at all. Because if they quickly communicate properly, then, 'cause it was an accident, - It was a pure accident. She didn't steal anything. She didn't break anything. She just went into their house and fell asleep. And then immediately got up and left. - I kind of feel like no harm, no foul, 'cause like also think about it. She doesn't live there. She's never gonna live in that neighborhood. or probably ever be there ever again. - True. Just leave. They don't know her identity. - They don't know her identity. Like, local cops are gonna be like, "Okay, yeah, we'll keep a picture of her.

"in case this ever happens again.". She's never gonna be there again. - I'm just the type, I'm shocked that the window was unlocked. for them to open and get in. - Must just be a Florida panhandle thing. - That's scary. - Everyone just leaves windows unlocked. - I mean, worst case scenario, she was seen on the cameras, maybe even her car driving by the front of the house, her license plate was on the cameras. - Yeah. - The police have that, and then they're like, "Hey, why did you do that and flee?". 'Cause it's still breaking and entering. - Yeah, it is breaking and entering. - And so then, but because she didn't tell anybody,

she just looks like she basically, it's an illegal thing. It's not like squatting, but it's like something. - It's true. - And so, but if she had told her friend. and they talked to the neighbors, it would've been all gravy. - Some comments here. "If you go to the police and explain this, "you are giving them all they need to charge you. "with breaking and entering or trespassing in the least. "Do you wanna be charged criminally? "Why voluntarily implicate yourself. "unless you desire to face legal repercussions?". Someone said, "Lawyer here. "Count your blessings. "and enjoy telling this story for years to come. "This is obviously not legal advice.

"So funny.". Someone else said, "Like a lot of people are telling you, just let it go. "I wanna be clear on this. "You aren't obligated to turn yourself in, "and it will not earn you any particular considerations. "If you're approached by the police, "contact a lawyer at that point.". I'm of the type too that if, but if it was your house. and you got contacted by this college kid. and they were like, "Hey, here's what happened. "I thought it was my friend's place. "I went and slept.". And then like, you talk to that friend, they're like,

"We did tell her that.". I wouldn't give a shit. I'd be like, "Well, I need to lock my windows. "Like, this was proof. "that someone could just easily get into my house.". - But like given how like litigious like Americans are-. - Oh yeah. - Like, I- - What's litigious? - Oh, like-. - We'll resort to legal action. - Quick to-. - Oh. - Yeah. - It's very true. You gotta assume people are gonna sue. because people are looking for opportunities to sue. - Yeah. So I... Yeah. - I also wouldn't assume that OP's like, yeah, like just get a lawyer if the police come.

It's like, well this person didn't wanna spend money. on staying in a place. Do you think that they just wanna spend money on a lawyer? Like, you should find a cheaper way to handle that. - That's fair. That's fair. - Yeah. - Update. - Ooh! Ooh. - They're spending five years in prison. - Oh no! - "My friend's family was able to get in contact. "with the homeowners and everything was fine. "They were grateful. "that we let them know the window was open. "and understanding about the mix-up. "I won't be climbing through an open window again. "I read all the posts here,

"and I'm thankful to you all for the advice. "FYI, I had already told my friend's family. "about the incident, and they were already in the process. "of trying to contact the homeowners when I made the post. "Otherwise I would've followed the advice. "and remained silent. "I'm lucky that the homeowners were understanding. "of the situation.". - Yeah, I mean if you really think about it, the other family that she did go into their house, like it was a blessing because it could have been a, like if they had never known. that that kitchen window was open like that, a break in could have actually happened. - She's lucky in Florida that no one was home.

- Yeah. - [Shayne] Frankly. - It's Florida. People be home. - Well, and people are dangerous. - Yeah, people got guns. - People in Florida are... - That actually, dude, that could have been so bad. - It could have been a horror movie situation. - I didn't even think about that. Like, if they were home. - [Shayne] No, she's lucky it was an empty house. - Yeah, 'cause imagine if they like came down in the morning. and they saw her on their couch. That's so scary. - I'm worried about them waking up. in the middle of the night. hearing someone crawl into their kitchen in the dark. - Florida. - Florida probably has like castle doctrine too,

which means that they can just shoot you. if they feel like it and they could just get away with it. - No. - No, super scary. She's very lucky. - Very lucky. - Extremely lucky. - Well, it's a happy ending for once. - It is a thankfully happy ending. - But if she were to go to prison, she probably could've gotten out through the kitchen window. - I don't know if she would've gone to to prison for that. - I know. It was a joke. Oh my god, stop. - That's true. (crew laughs). - All right, next story. All right, this next post comes from Am I The Asshole. "Am I the asshole for not wanting people at our pool?

"My fiance and I own a house with a pool in the backyard. "His brother Jay had asked the day before if he. "and his family, wife plus three kids, "could come over on Sunday to swim. "after one of the kids' sports games, "which was at a park close by to us. "Now, my fiance and I own a business together. "that requires work from home on Sundays. "Everyone that we know is aware of this, "including his brother. "I voiced my opinion that I felt it was weird. "for people to be at our house. "while we were working in the basement, "but my fiance assured me that it would just be chill.

"He said it's normal for families. "to use people's pools even if they weren't home. "So we let them come thinking that they would swim. "for maybe an hour then leave. "But it wasn't just them. "Fiance's parents also came. "We figured they would. "But the kicker is that Jay also invited two of his friends, "plus their partners and their kids as well. "We do know these people, "but both fiance and I were not aware of this beforehand. "So now it's a full on party in our backyard. "while we are working in the basement. "I became very annoyed. "that they did not only invite themselves. "but some of their friends as well.

"It made me feel guilty. "that I couldn't be in my own backyard to host people. "because I was working. "It also felt like they were just using the house. "and didn't really care about seeing us, the homeowners. "Not to mention the house was a complete mess. "We had a busy Friday and Saturday, "and I didn't bother cleaning much before. "because I figured it would just be Jay's family. "Everyone was here from 1:00 PM till 7:00 PM. "We finished work around 3:00 PM, "at which time my fiance put on his swim trunks. "to join them outside. "I got in a pretty bitter mood from it all.

"and stayed inside. "I didn't say hello to anyone. "because I figured they weren't even here to see me, "just my pool. "I did some laundry and some cleaning up, "and I did end up seeing a few people. "who were coming inside to use the washrooms. "I said hi and tried to make some small talk, "but I really wasn't happy. "Fiance came in and said. "that I was creating an awkward/unwelcoming atmosphere. "by not being outside. "I told him I never planned to have a party today, "so I was just carrying on doing. "what I originally had planned, "which was laundry and cleaning. "Fiance keeps saying that I was rude.

"for not joining them outside after work. "He also says things like the pool is meant to be used. "and that it's family time. "Am I the asshole? "ETA, answering those who have asked, "we bought this house together completely 50/50.". - I just, when he mentioned. that everyone was out there having fun and he was inside, I just immediately pictured the Squidward meme. of him like looking through the window. - Oh, look through the blinds. - At them like having fun outside.

- I so understand what this lady's feeling. And I think she's trying to word things. I think she's giving herself excuses in this post. where she's like, "And I felt bad like. "'cause I can't like be there to say hi.". And I'm like, maybe, be honest, did you also just not want people around? - Yeah. - Like, that's okay too. You don't have to like say these things. Regardless though. - I can't help but feel like she is hung up. on the fact that these people, I mean granted adding guests and making it a bigger ordeal.

wasn't what they agreed on. But the fact that, and then when I heard her say like, "Oh, not to mention the house is a mess.". I was like, "Oh no. And they trashed her house?". It's like, nope, that was their mess. They actually didn't cause anything bad to happen. She didn't complain about them causing disturbances. to affect her workday. So like she's just really hung up on the idea. that more people are at her house, and I can't help but see between the lines. that she's like, she was clearly like moping.

and wanting people to see that she was upset. Like, her being like, "Yeah, I wasn't gonna go outside. "since they only wanted to see my pool anyway.". It's like, where did you get that? - I get the sense, I mean, I don't know, I'm reading into it, but it's the principle of it. that they invited more people, and it's like, okay, that's disrespectful. 'cause you're using us and you're just like, "Okay, anyone can come into here.". - Yeah. - The issue that I feel like I see. is that her and her fiance have very different views on this. 'cause he seems super okay with it.

Like, he hit 3:00, and he was like, "I'm getting my swim trunks on. "I'm joining them.". And his family seems to understand. that he is totally cool with it. - Yeah. - And this seems to be how their family operates, whereas it's not how she operates. And I relate to her 'cause I'm like, that's not how I operate. But I'm also someone, my social battery runs out really fast. I'm someone that after work, like if I'm working and I'm busy on a day, like I kind of need that time to myself. I need that peace and quiet. And my space is like a very important space to me.

And I think that's the case for her. And she's just like, "Oh, there's people here. "Like, and they're here all day, "and there's a bunch of people I...". They know everyone. But it just seems like she's upset at-. - The principle. - The principle of it all. - Yeah. I definitely like relate. to like her not wanting to go out after that, just because like if I get really mopey about something, it's really hard to like sometimes. just immediately pull myself out of that. - [Shayne] Right. - Like, if I feel like slighted by something happening,

or like I mean she was probably hearing like kids and stuff. having fun out there, and she's there like working, and it's like, yes, I would like to be having fun right now. - Right. - But I'm working, and everyone else, I could hear them having fun. And that is kind of like a mental (beep). - I also get, but it's like they worked until 3:00. They kept swimming until 7:00, so she could have joined them. It sounded like the fiance was like, "Great. "Like, this is an opportunity. "to spend some family time together.".

I can't help but read so deep into this of like, if these were people that she genuinely liked, it wouldn't be the reaction that she has. You know what I'm saying? - Yeah. I get that. I also just think like, I would feel upset. if I invited people over, like maybe she didn't even want people. to come over in the first place. And then it's just like, and then they brought a bunch more people, and it's like, oh, you have a whole party going on. in your backyard. - Totally. - I absolutely don't think she's the asshole. I mean, it's like-. - No.

- It's their house. You're allowed to be like, "I don't really want people over at my house today.". You're allowed to feel that way. - Yeah. - So I don't think she's the asshole. I think... But I also, I get it 'cause I'm the same way as her. where I'm not gonna be able to confront it. Especially if I'm like, "Well, it's not that big of a deal.". Like, I'm sure deep down she's going, "Well, it's not that big of a deal. "They're just using our pool. "But like, I'm upset, "but I don't feel justified in voicing it. "or saying anything.". I think she and her fiance. need to have a more like clear understanding.

of like how these things should operate. 'cause it seems like they're on different pages. - Yeah. And boundaries. - Yeah. Yeah, 'cause like it's her house. If she wants to just stay inside. and keep doing what she was planning to do, like that fully was like logically sound to me. She wanted to keep doing. what she was planning to do that Sunday anyway. I as like family would be like, "Okay, we're gonna quickly like go into our friend's pool. "Like, okay, guys, we've been here a while. "Time to go.". But, you know, I don't know.

- The verdict appears to be not the asshole. We don't have an official verdict. But all the comments are not the asshole. "Not the asshole. "You're not obligated to host a party you didn't want. "with people you didn't invite.". Someone said, "Not the asshole. "But you and your fiance. "need to have a serious conversation about this. "It is guaranteed not to be a one-time thing, "and you clearly have very different expectations. "about your home life. "I hope you're prepared for unexpected and unwanted guests. "for the rest of your life. "Your fiance clearly thinks your home is a community center, "and you clearly think it is a private place. "Neither approach is wrong,

"but they're entirely incompatible.". Someone else said, "Not the asshole. "This is shitty behavior all around. "You don't invite other people to a house you don't live in. "Your fiance is an asshole too for allowing this BS.". - That's aggressive. - [Shayne] I think that's a little aggressive. - That's aggressive. - That's intense. - I know lots of people, growing up there were friends of mine. who they operated this way. And they loved operating this way. - [Ian] Yeah. - I am the opposite. My place is like, I'm like, I need... I love having people over,

but I like to know who's coming over and be prepared for it. - And you'd like to know when they're gonna leave. - Yeah, that too. But I remember I had some buddies forever ago. who really operated like this. to the point where my friend and I were going to a party. and we thought it was at their place. And so we just show up and we truly just opened the door. 'cause we thought like there was a party happening there. And we opened it up and they're just hanging out, and they're just like, "Oh, what's up, guys?". And they didn't realize we were coming over. 'cause we had the wrong address.

'Cause the party wasn't happening at their place. So we truly waltzed into their apartment. They're just like, "Oh, what's up, man?". And they were totally chill. - Aw! - 'Cause that's what people did at their place. And I was like, "Oh my god, I'm so sorry.". And they're like, "No, we don't care.". - That's so cute. I like how that was cute. - I know. It was really funny. But that's how they worked. And when I was hanging out at their place, people would just come over and just enter and hang out. And they loved it. And that's fine. - Yeah. - If people did that to me-. - Oh yeah, no. - I would be like, "What the (beep) is going on?". - Yeah.

The only part in that that I was like eh about. was like the brother's expectation. that since they had a pool, it's like something that's normal. for people to just come and use their pool. - Well, that's what the fiance said. - I think it kind of depends on the state. - Her fiance said, "Yeah, if you have a pool, "like people can come over and use it.". - That's not a worldwide thing. I think that's like. a community centric thing. - That's what I mean. I think they had very different upbringings. And they need to understand. that they have different upbringings. - I also am curious if maybe the fiance knew.

that the additional friends were coming and stuff. Maybe that wasn't just communicated between them. - That seems possible too. Well, hopefully they talk about it. - Yeah, and like I agree. She's definitely not the asshole. 'cause she didn't do anything. She had feelings and that's like literally it. And that's like classic for like feeling like an asshole. for having feelings of those situations. - Yeah, you're never an asshole for how you feel. It's the actions you take on that feeling. Well, next story. This one also has to do with a pool.

- Hmm. - [Shayne] Here we go. - Pool vibes. - This was on Am I The Asshole. and ended up on Am I The Devil. - Oh. - Ooh. - They pooped in the pool, didn't they? - Oh boy. - They did an old number two in the pool. - "Am I the asshole for arguing with the lifeguard. "at my local pool?". Probably. - Why I oughta. - Don't save me! - Sitting on that big chair. - I'm fine. (Courtney laughs). "Throwaway because my friends know my usual account. "I, a 37-year-old woman, "was at our local community center pool today.

"with my three children. "For this post, I will change their names, "but they are Jane who's three, "Allison who's five, and Henry who's eight. "Going to the pool is a regular outing for us. "Sometimes we go with my husband, but today he was at work, "so I took them by myself. "I got the kids ready in the family change room area. "and entered the pool area. "Henry is a great swimmer, "so I often let him watch Allison not far away from me. "in an area of the pool that is slightly over their heads. "There are also at least two lifeguards watching this pool. "all the time.

"Jane prefers to stay in the shallower area of the pool. "So I usually stay over there with her. "Well, today I was sitting in the shallow area with Jane, "as I usually do, "while Allison and Henry swam a little further away. "in the deeper area of the pool. "This pool does not have a normal layout. "It is meant for kids, so it has a lazy river, "which is about four feet deep, "a basketball court area, which is five feet deep, "and a baby area, which is kind of like a beach. "One of the lifeguards yelled at me. "to be in arm's reach of all my kids.".

- Oh. - "She was very rude. "So I told her we swim here all the time, "and it has never been a problem. "She told me that they were too young. "to swim in this section alone. "I pointed out that it was a kids' pool, "and they are good swimmers, "but she still said they couldn't swim without an adult. "until they're 12. "So I put Jane in a float and went over there with them. "even though Jane was not happy about it. "Allison and Henry were playing on big floating pool toys. "about five feet away from me. "And I was just keeping Jane occupied. "since she doesn't like being in the deeper water.

"Well, Allison fell off the floaty she was playing with. "while I was playing with Jane. "And the next thing I know, "the lifeguard is blowing her whistle. "and jumping in after Allison. "She handed her to me looking kind of pissed off. "I told her she didn't need to get in. "and that Allison can swim, plus Henry was watching her. "The lifeguard said, 'Well, she wasn't,'. "and then told me that if I wanted to keep swimming, "I had to put my children in life jackets. "I told her that was ridiculous. "because my children can swim, "plus she is obviously there to save them.

"in case they need help. "I left shortly after, but am I the asshole. "for not wanting to put them in life jackets. "and expecting the lifeguards to actually do their jobs? "My husband thinks I should have been closer, "but my sister agrees with me.". - Yes. She's an asshole. (Shayne laughs). I mean like, I think... This is a community pool. Again, this is another reminder, Americans are very litigious. They will sue.

They have specific rules in place because if a child drowns, that family is going to try to blame the community center. - [Shayne] Yeah. - Then they sue the community center, and then now the community center is out of business, gone. They can't run it. It's shut down. - Right. - Like, yeah, an eight-year-old can't be like responsible. for like a six-year-old or whatever that situation is. - Five and yeah, three, five, and eight. - Yeah, so it's like in a place where like it's,

it's a community center. Like, it's like tax dollars. Like, we all have to like do our part. to like keep it a safe place. that we can all continue to use. - Yeah. - And so yeah, we should all follow the rules. so that a child doesn't die. and then that parent sues that place. and then none of us can use it anymore. - What I will like push back on that is like, it was just the lifeguard saying that. I don't know if that was an actual rule of the pool. of needing to be arms length of your child at all times, 'cause I've been to a lot of community pools growing up.

as a kid, like with my cousins and stuff, and there was a lot of us, and I never was near a parent. - Right. - A lot of 'em are very lax. - And if your kid's a strong swimmer, your kid's a strong swimmer. So like the fact that there were other lifeguards. in the past. This mom had swam there so many times with her kids, and it wasn't an issue. And then this new lifeguard just states this rule. I do think it's a little strange. And so like I understand there's those legal aspects, but part of me is like she was confident in her children.

as a swimmer and they were still in her sight, and if there are lifeguards on duty, I can't help but see where she's coming from. - Yeah, I guess I'm just thinking it must be the rules. of the pool. If it's not, then-. - I would be curious about that. - And that lifeguard is just, you know, power tripping, then I guess like, then that's a totally different-. - Yeah, 'cause like I know that it's like, oh, if there's a kid under a certain age, then they have to wear a life jacket in the pool. or they have to have arm floaties. - [Ian] Yeah. - Like, there are things like that.

But that's why I'm like, it seems like it's inconsistent between the lifeguards. - Yeah, I mean, I understand that. Five is pretty young. I do think it's like, as someone who's drowned-. (everyone laughs). - Yeah, you're an expert in this field. - Yeah, you remember it very well, right? - They couldn't swim without, but like she said they couldn't swim without an adult. until they're 12. I'm like, damn, if I was 10 or 11 and I couldn't swim-. - Oh yeah. - But define without an adult. - But the arm's length is interesting for an eight-year-old.

But I'm wondering if it's the five-year-old. I also wonder how old the five-year-old looks, if they look younger. - This pool sounds sick though, I gotta say. - It sounds dope. - [Shayne] Yeah. - I wanna go. Take me there. - I never had a community pool. like that. - I'll watch your kids. - I mean, I think her phrasing makes her an asshole though. when she's like, "Well, the lifeguards are there to save my kid.". - Yeah. - I'm like, the lifeguards like, she's like, "They're there to do their job.". I'm like, they're doing their job by telling you, like by preventing someone from drowning. Like, that's the thing. - No, yeah.

- They are trying to prevent that from happening. Their job is not to, oh, yeah, guys, go have fun. If you drown, we'll save you. - No, for sure. Like, you're not allowed to commit arson. because a firefighter will put it out. Like, no, I get that. And I learned how to swim when I was very young. Our oldest sister was a swim teacher, so all of us learned really young. and were pretty quickly strong swimmers. So like, I just, I think there's a lot at play there. And yeah, but I agree. The way she's talking about this lifeguard, it's not... - Yeah, and it's also though,

like even when you're able to swim though, like little kids, they do stupid things. 'cause they're little kids. And the problem is in a pool, one small slipup or stupid move is a lot more deadly. than when you're on the ground and you have a fall. or you hit your head or something. - Yeah. - I think it's just a general safety thing too. - Yeah, no. Like, just 'cause there's a lifeguard there. doesn't mean you don't have to parent your kids. Like, I don't really get that. - Right. And I don't also love the like, "Oh, my eight-year-old to watch my five-year-old.". I'm like, that's also not-.

- Yeah. I see that. - I know a lot of parents do that, but it's like, also a lot of kids drown. Like, I think it's one of those things. where it's like, you know, we're really scared of sharks, but we underestimate the things. that actually kill people every day. And it's like just pools. Pools kill a lot of people. And it's because it's like so like, "Oh, it's just a pool and we're swimming, it's fine.". It's like... - I will say, like it would suck to have to continue. to wear floaties or be within arm's length of a parent.

if I was like 10 or 11. - 11. - I'd be pissed. - Like, that just seems so lame. - I will say like, yeah, I understand where I'm like, when I was a kid, no, we didn't. We didn't do that. But the arm's length, I'm like, wow, that is intense. But you certainly had to be within-. - It seems like a liability thing to me. - It might be just this specific pool. And also, time has passed like since I was a kid. - Time has passed. Yeah, it's possible rules have gotten tighter. because like I always heard that it was like,

the parents just need to have their eyes. and have to be within like sight of their kids at all times. But then again, my family like had grandparents. who had like a boat on a river. And so I was technically supposed to wear a life jacket. until I was 14 or something. And you wear a helmet until you're 18. - Yeah, rivers and stuff 'cause it's a whole other story. - Yeah. - The verdict is asshole, which I agree. I think if you're arguing with a lifeguard, you're already, you're just the asshole. Like, they are the ones who set the rules.

You gotta obey the rules. Comments. "You're the asshole. "She was actually doing her job. "It takes a few minutes for a child. "or adult to get into trouble and drown. "I'm an excellent swimmer. "That didn't mean squat when I got a cramp. "Fortunately I knew how to handle the emergency. "and get myself into the safe part of the pool. "Yes, your kids know how to swim, "but do they know what to do when there's an emergency? "Most people who are drowning panic. "and make things 100 times worse. "Why do you think lifeguards have to be trained? "They have to overcome a person's panic and rescue them.

"Henry is not old enough. "or skilled enough to be a lifesaver. "You've been lucky so far. "It appears you have had negligent lifeguards in the past.". 1,000 up votes. It's also true. A drowning person is very dangerous. - Yeah. Yeah. - And a kid can't handle that. - No, yeah. Like, I do understand that. I completely see where that's coming from, 'cause yeah, like if the five year-old starts drowning, what are we gonna do? - Yeah, how do you manage three children in a pool? I guess that-. - That's tough. - It is scary.

Someone said, "Lifeguards aren't your personal babysitters. "And your eight-year-old, as great a swimmer as they may be, "isn't old enough to watch your five-year-old. "You should apologize to the lifeguard and watch your kids.". OP posted, "This is a pool that is meant for kids. "It is not unreasonable for kids to swim alone. "with the supervision of lifeguards. "Plus, like I said, I went closer to them. "when the lifeguard asked.". 922 down votes. Now I really think OP is the asshole because I'm like, why'd you post here if you're just not gonna listen?

- You're gonna double down. Yeah. - Like, it just sounds like they, I'm like, you're the asshole. You think you're right. Why did you post here? What are you doing? Someone said, "Disneyland is also meant for kids. "Would you just abandon a five and eight-year-old?". (Courtney laughs). "Would you drop your kids off at a PG movie and just leave? "We both know the answer is no.". - Yeah, it's not like the water is like softer for them. or like less drowny. - Yeah, there's so many elements. 'cause drowning is scary because it's not something that,

people I think think it'll be like obvious too. - Oh yeah, it's not. - That it's like, "Oh, I can see my kids over there.". It's like, "Oh, it's gonna be this big loud thing.". It's like, it could be super quiet. - You could never, never see it. - You might not know. Like, it's a really, it's a thing I think people underestimate a lot. But ultimately here I'm like, I could picture this scenario. and I could picture myself agreeing and being like, "Yeah, like I see that this is safe.". But I'm like, the lifeguard is saying something. - You gotta.

Yeah, 'cause it's not like, the lifeguard isn't there just for the kids. It's for everyone in the pool. So including the mom and, no, like, I totally get that. - Yeah. - I hope they did sick cannonballs. - Sick cannonballs? Dude, lazy river? A lazy river. at a community pool? - And a basketball. pool court area? - That is so sick. - This is not a pool meant for kids. It's a pool meant for me. - Yeah. (Courtney laughs). - I'm meant to be there hanging out. - It's giving like Scottsdale, Arizona. - Yeah. This has got Arizona vibes.

- Feels like a water park. - Or something. - [Shayne] Yeah. - This is a affluent area. - I know. For real. Next story. "Am I the asshole for grounding my daughter. "for ruining our vacation?". - Whoa. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. - Whoo. - Whoa, whoa, whoa. - Okay. "My husband, daughter, who's, my daughter's 15, "step kids, 13 and 16, "and I just came back from a two week vacation.". - Wait, can you say the numbers again? - So, okay.

OP is saying, "My husband, daughter,". the daughter is 15, and there's two step kids, 13 and 16, "and I just came back from a two week vacation. "My daughter is very smart. "and is very good at a lot of things. "She's also very competitive. "My husband is also very competitive. "My daughter started off this vacation. "by telling my husband there was Sudoku on the plane. "and explained how to play. "He didn't know that she's been playing Sudoku for months. "She made a bet with him. "that if she finishes the hardest level first,

"he'd buy her wifi for the flight. "And if he finished first, "she'd share a bed with his younger daughter on the trip. "His younger daughter was complaining. "about sharing with his oldest because she kicks. "and sleeps in the middle of the bed. "She beat him and pestered him until he bought the wifi.". (Courtney laughs). "When we got there, "she'd challenge him to races on land and in the pool. "She's won medals at state track meets. "and has been swimming since she was two. "Every day she'd challenge him to something, win,

"and he'd have to buy her something from the resort. "or local shops. "My husband was getting sick of losing, "and my stepdaughters were upset. "that their dad was buying her stuff and not them. "So I told my daughter she either couldn't compete. "with her stepdad or she had to let him win.". - Oh! - This is the most ass backwards problem solving. (everyone laughs). "She decided to tell her stepdad. "that she wasn't allowed to compete with him anymore. "because he couldn't handle losing. "This made them start to argue, "so I told her that if she didn't keep it up,

"she'd be grounded to the resort for the rest of the trip, "a little over a week at this point. "She decided to test me, so I stuck to my word, "and she was left at the resort. "while the rest of us went out every day. "The vacation was much more enjoyable. "without her turning everything into a competition. "But she told her dad when she got back. "that we grounded her, "and he's mad at me now for leaving her there. "and excluding her from the vacation. "because my husband couldn't act like an adult. "I told him my daughter was warned to stop, "but she decided to test me,

"and now he's forcing her to stick to the custody schedule, "technically I have her every other weekend, "but he was letting her go back and forth. "whenever she wanted, "and is threatening to go to court for child support. "and back pay. "Am I the asshole for grounding her. "for ruining the vacation?". - Whoa. - Wow. - This is the dumbest shit. This is so stupid. - Wait, how did the child support come in? I'm so sorry. - So once they got back from vacation, the dad found out what she did to their daughter. on vacation. - Okay. Okay. - And he's upset, and he's saying, you know,

excluding her from the vacation-. - Gotcha. - Because the husband couldn't act like an adult. - [Courtney] Right. - She put the responsibility on the child. - Yeah. No, I got that part very much. - I love this. I think it's so funny, like the idea of this like 16-year-old girl. just completely emasculating her husband. And he's just seething. It's great. - And she's just beating the shit out of him in everything. - And it so awesome.

- Just destroying him. - It's awesome. And like, okay, I will just like preface, if it's between a kid and an adult, issue between the two, it is always up to the adult to act and handle. - All he had to do was say like, "We can keep doing competitions, but there's no stakes.". - Yes. - That's all you do. - Yeah. - You go like, "We can race-". - But it wasn't about that for him. It wasn't about it. It was about winning. - He kept having to put something on the table. - He had to keep, no, and it wasn't even about what was on the table. He just hated that he kept losing.

- I know, but they can keep competing. - But he didn't wanna keep competing because he kept losing. - No, he wanted to keep competing. - [Ian] He wanted to keep competing. - 'Cause he wanted to win. - Yes. - But he was mad 'cause he kept losing. - But all the problems came. because he kept having to buy her things for losing. - Which was showing like preferential treatment. - Right. I know. - We can race, but I'm not gonna buy you anything afterwards. - He's such a loser. Like, he's like literally like... (Courtney laughs). - This really is a skill issue. - Like, yo, 100%. - A skill issue. - Like, he must have like a gambling addiction.

- Yes. - He must. Because like, how can you just continue to lose. and then keep being like, "No, no, no, but this time, I'm gonna win it all back.". - Exactly. - Like, come on, bro. - I just don't understand how she blamed the daughter. instead of being mad at him-. - So stupid. - For continuing to like... Like, yeah, he's an adult. Stop. - Yeah. - [Shayne] Stop it, dude. - It's literally like, all he has to do is just say, "No.". - All he had to do. - She's like, "Hey, I'll race you to the end of the road for a slushie.".

And he could be like, "I'll race you, but I don't think we need,". like why does there need to be stakes? - It's so-. - It's just an ego thing. It's just an ego thing. - Because kids do that, like up until they're teenager. - They want stuff. - My nieces and nephew constantly. will like challenge me to shit. And yeah, just be like, "Nah, I don't feel like it. "Nah.". They'll keep trying. You just gotta be like, "Nah.". - I accept my nephew's challenges, and I beat him. - One of my nieces beat me at "Mario Kart".

for the first time. And I have to admit, I was definitely just like, "Okay, next time we play, "like I'm amping it up to the next level. "Like, this is getting serious now.". - I guess that's one thing I can never relate to. Maybe I had to let go of it at such a young age. because I had so many competitive siblings. that like it was their whole world to win. that like I care about how I perform, but as soon as I know I'm losing, I'm like, all right, I knew I wasn't gonna win anyway. Like, it's just, I don't feel that feeling.

But also, I don't know. I love how people get competitive. I think that's really sweet. But when your kid beats you, you should be so proud. - Oh, I was stoked. - No, not you, but like this dad, like-. - Right. - I don't know. - It's also not his kid. - Well-. - [Shayne] It's not his kid. - He stepped up. - But also, it's a 15-year-old, so like it's not like when an eight-year-old beats you. at something. It's like they're 15. Like, they are like, I don't know.

I'm assuming they're late, I don't know what their ages are, but if there's a 15-year-old in like, you know, they're probably their 40s or something. - Yeah. - It's like a 15-year-old's probably gonna beat you. at a race. Like, okay. Like, who gives a shit? - Yeah. - Not if I have anything to say about it. (Shayne laughs). - Like, get good at Sudoku, man. I don't know. What the hell? - That's kind of awesome. I actually like... Yeah, I'm impressed. - It's so innocent, you know? - It could have been so funny. - [Ian] Yes. - She made it awful. - Yeah. - The mom.

- The mom made it awful. Yeah. But the other kids were sad that they weren't getting stuff. The dad could have at least been like, "All right, if you win, "I'll get all you girls ice cream," or something. - Yeah. That would've been good. - Then it's a win. - There were so many easy solutions. - That brings the family together. - Exactly. Exactly. - No, this was the dumbest shit ever. - The child custody thing was wild. - That's just retribution. - Really, really stupid. God. Okay. Comments, or verdict. Asshole.

- Oh, whoa. - Comments. "Wow. You're the asshole. "'I told my daughter she either couldn't compete. ""with her stepdad or she had to let him win.'. "No, you tell your husband to be an adult. "and stop taking the bait. "It's not your daughter's responsibility. "to manage a grown adult's immaturity.". If I heard someone tell a 15-year-old like, "Just let him win,". that's when I would be like, oh... - That's so sad. - Now I'm a baby. Now you're treating me like a baby. - Yeah. - Someone said, "Yep. She didn't ruin the trip.

"He did by not knowing how to adult.". Someone said, "Hell, a whole basketball team. "of ragtag men couldn't beat Caitlin Clark. "playing all by herself. "All she needed was another team member. "that could score 13 points and Iowa would've won.". - Basketball reference. - I don't know that. - Basketball reference. - That was sick. I barely got it. Barely. Barely there. - OP posted, "She's both athletically gifted and smart. "On top of her swimming and running, "she's a level six or seven gymnast.

"and a decent softball player. "She's consistently scored around the 80th. "to 90th percentile for reading and 95th in math. "Since she's this smart, "she should know not to take advantage of people.". - Huh? - "That are not as gifted as her.". Jesus. - So she's just admitting that her husband's a dumb dumb. - Yeah. - No, that's crazy. - And my stupid, weak, shitty, stupid husband. - That is so sad. - What a moron. - You are instilling such horrible life lessons. in your daughter by saying,

"You're amazing, but you need to make yourself smaller. "for this grown-ass adult because he,". and like the mom knows all these things about her daughter. I'm sure the husband knows all these things. He should consider when he's competing with someone. who sounds like they will be. a successful professional athlete one day. what they're agreeing to. That's crazy. - When your daughter's a gold medalist, you're not gonna be receiving any of those brand deal monies. that they're sponsor-. - No, no. This mom might be going to the home later in life. Like, this is not gonna end well.

- Somebody responded to that comment saying, "You expect more maturity from your daughter. "than you will expect or ask from your husband. "and you wonder if you're the asshole?". - Yeah, it's giving misogyny. - Yeah. - God damn. - Internalized misogyny the house down. - Holy shit. Look, my daughter's Batman, okay. So she should be the better one. Insane. Wow. That is... - And she just never learned. - Mind-boggling. - Cool. - This episode of "Reddit Stories" is brought to you. by Zocdoc.

Finding a doctor is extremely hard. It's needlessly complicated. And to be completely honest with you, I didn't go to a doctor for a long time. because of how complicated the process was. I tried, I struggled, and I would give up. But finally, I have a doctor's appointment coming up, and I have it through Zocdoc. They streamline the whole process. It's an app that is easy to use and free, and you can find doctors in your area, and you can decide whether you wanna see them or not,

if they're highly rated. It's great. It puts it all right in front of you. It makes a decision super easy. Zocdoc is a free app and website where you can search. and compare highly rated in-network doctors near you. and instantly book appointments with them online. The typical wait time on Zocdoc to see a doctor. is between 24 and 72 hours. It's that convenient. I've used it. Highly recommend it. So check it out. If you want to, you can go to zocdoc.com/pitreddit. and download the Zocdoc app for free.

Then find and book a top rated doctor today. That's Z-O-C-D-O-C .com/pitreddit. Zocdoc.com/pitreddit. Back to the show. Next story. - Let's go. - This comes from Relationship Advice. This is a 28-year-old woman. "My boyfriend, who's 29, and his best friend, "a 29-year-old woman, are going on a week long vacation. "They uninvited me.". - Oh! I'm sure their relationship's going great.

(Courtney laughs). - Guys, it's platonic. "My boyfriend wanted to go on a vacation this summer. "to his mom's friend's house in Hawaii. "with me and his two best friends, "a 25-year-old guy and a 29-year-old woman. "We had been planning on this all spring, "and at some point, 25-year-old guy dropped out of the trip. "leaving just the three of us. "For context, "my boyfriend and I have been going out since November, "and it's been serious. "We had and still have been talking about moving in together. "and he has said, and I agree,

"that this is a long term situation. "and that we are in it for good. "In early June once 25-year-old man unexpectedly dropped out. "of the trip, 29-year-old woman called my boyfriend. "and told him that now that it was just the three of us, "she didn't feel comfortable with me going on the trip. "since she didn't know me that well. "and she didn't want to be a third wheel. "She said that if I were to go, "she wouldn't go on the trip. "Without telling me that this was happening, "they changed the plans and made it a trip.

"just the two of them. "And they changed the location to a beach in Costa Rica.". - Huh? - "I was trying to figure out. "when to ask for time off this summer. "and hadn't heard news about the plans. "So I asked my boyfriend. "which week in August I should be setting aside. "for the Hawaii trip. "He let me know that actually he had talked to his friend. "and that she didn't want to go if I were going, "so he was going to go alone with her to Costa Rica. "He said that we could go on another a week later. "maybe to Mexico City or something. "I was upset and tried to talk with him.

"about how the situation made me feel, "especially since this wasn't a case of a separate trip. "being set up ahead of time. "This was a case of me being invited. "and then uninvited from a week long tropical vacation. "with a girl friend of his who I had never met before. "We eventually decided to do a trip together to Copenhagen, "which we have both wanted to visit. "as some sort of compensation. "I also asked to meet her. "so that I could feel more comfortable with the trip. "We spent the-". - Dude... - "We spent the 4th of July going to see her.

"and her boyfriend in the city where they live. "Although it was nice to put a face to a name, "it was ultimately a very cold trip, "and she was not at all welcoming to me. "My boyfriend remarked. "on how unfriendly she was to both of us he thought. "and said that he was surprised. "that she didn't act warmly to me. "I went outta my way to try to get to know her. "and her boyfriend. "I'm very outgoing and friendly. "and usually this would be easy, "but it didn't really click even after several days. "They were somewhat cold to each other as well. "They bickered a little bit about their future. "and his own three week trip without her.

"that was scheduled for the same time as their trip. "This has been scheduled before ours had. "This has been my effort to feel better about the trip. "So I told my boyfriend that I still didn't feel comfortable. "with things and that I was feeling insulted. "by the way that it was handled. "I had tried to make things smooth between all of us, "and I asked him to please come up with something. "that could help me feel better about the trip. "On a visit to his family, they asked about the trip, "and they were all shocked. "that he would have arranged it this way. "and let me know that they would've been furious. "if they were in my position, "which triggered a fight in which I asked him.

"to please help come up with a strategy. "to make me feel better and more secure. "about them going together without me. "He said that he would never do this kind of thing again, "which feels like not much to offer. "since this is kind of a once in a lifetime trip. "to begin with. "He kind of offered to not go on the trip, "but he had already paid for the tickets. "and made arrangements and I didn't wanna stop their trip. "and be resented by both him and his best friend. "He asked me to give him ideas of how to make me feel better. "and wanted me to just tell him what to do. "and stalled and stalled.

"until it was finally the day of the trip.". (Courtney groans). "He bought me a bag of peanut butter cups, "and I drove the two of them to the airport. "I feel so disregarded and disrespected in the situation. "I wanna break up with him, "but I don't wanna burn up something. "that has otherwise been really good.". (Courtney laughs). - Sorry, I had so many emotions. - Otherwise? - Otherwise it's really good. - Other than this like months long ordeal? - This is one of those situations where I'm like, wow, like I feel bad for this person. that they don't have more self-worth. - Yeah. - Like, I feel like that's just an immediate done.

- [Ian] Yeah. - Like, especially the way this has all happened. where it's like, "Oh, by the way, behind your back, "I uninvited you and I'm going on this trip. "with just my one friend and we're going-". - Who you've never met. - Who you've never met, and we changed location. to a much more like romantic type of situation. - Other country basically. - And it's a week long. Oh my god. And it's because she didn't want you to go. - Yeah. - Like, it's not like, oh, whatever. It's like, no, she said this,

and she made it a choice between the two of you. And I chose her. - Yeah, that's the craziest thing to me. where like if she said she doesn't feel comfortable. being third wheel, totally get that. That's totally fine. - [Courtney] Yeah. - But for her to say, "You need to uninvite your girlfriend. "'cause I still wanna go on this trip with you. "You need to uninvite your girlfriend.". And he's like, "Okay.". Like what? - What in the world? - She's a huge piece of shit. She very clearly-. - The friend. Yeah.

- The friend is a huge piece of shit. He's a piece of shit. - He's a terrible communicator. He's an idiot. He's an idiot. - No, it seems very clear. This is one of those situations where I'm like, oh yeah, like this is a cheating situation. - This is done. And I feel so bad for OP because she kept going, "Hey, can you come up with a reason. "or can you come up with a strategy to make me feel better?". And it's like, girly, please-. - He bought her peanut butter cups though. - I know. - He bought her peanut butter cups. - This guy. This guy. And it's like, girly, please stop being a doormat.

as a treat. You are so much more than that. And like the fact that she did a lot. She went out of her way like, "Let me meet this friend. "Let me go outta my way to get to know her and be friendly.". And then for the relationship of the friend to be weird, and that he's going on a trip without her. Like, that is so beyond their relationship. - And even for him to like remark that like, to agree that she was like super cold to both of them. - Yeah.

- And still be, "But you know what? "I still think I'm gonna go. "on this really romantic Costa Rica trip with her.". - Yeah. - "Sounds pretty hot.". - Insane. - Couple comments. Number one. "Oh hell no.". - Yeah. - Someone else said, "When someone shows you who they are, listen. "Go no contact before he gets back. "Done and done.". Someone said, "What kind of boyfriend disinvites his girlfriend. "from a trip? "A shitty one. "A really, really shitty one. "He just acted like he didn't care about you, "even if he's not cheating.". - I just gotta say like, the fact that they just kind of stalled.

and like allowed this vacation to get closer. - Oh yeah. - This OP, please, please learn boundaries and hold to them. because this guy is clearly used to like, I don't know, I'm just going through life. - I'm just a guy. - I'm just a little guy. - I'm just a guy. I don't even know what's going on. - And that's not up to her to have to overcompensate. and fix. I'm just saying like she should have said, "Hey, then hold the trip like way sooner. "This is weird. This is weird.".

And like she's gaslighting herself and thinking like, "Well, maybe it's fine, right?". But it's like, it's a week long tropical vacation. in Costa Rica. Bikinis are in the equation. It's hot, it's sweaty. It's a week long in a place that's new. - They're gonna be looking at sloths. - There's sloths. There's lizards. - Yeah. - Crawling around. And how did even from square one, did any of that feel normal? - Yeah. - I have an unfortunate feeling.

Okay, I think I read this first part of the story, and I don't think I've read the update. (Courtney gasps). - There's an update? - That we're about to have right now. So I'm gonna say my prediction on this. I think this girl, 'cause we've had this trope a couple times. on "Reddit Stories" of a girl where it's like, it's a girl friend. and she has a friend who's a guy that she won't date, but she then gets upset if he has a girlfriend. - Right. - And she's like, "No, you can't have a girlfriend, "but I won't date you.". And I think he's been in love with her for a long time, and now he's kinda like, "Oh, this is like an opportunity to like hang out with her.

"Maybe I'm getting a sign.". - Yep. - And it's like-. - Yeah. - 'Cause she's got like one foot out the door. with this other guy. - Very clearly. - 'Cause that's kind of shaky. Which I'm sure he knows all about because they're friends. and they talk about it. - No, this seems-. - This is a feeler. This vacation's a feeler. - It's a feeler. We've seen this before. - Yes. - [Ian] Yeah. - All right, update. Here we go. And it's a doozy. "I was really upset the day I dropped him off, "and he was texting me, but I wasn't responding. "I wasn't sure what I wanted to do,

"but I didn't wanna do anything at all. "in the state I was in. "I waited until the next day, "and then I sent him a thought out text. "letting him know that I didn't feel safe. "or loved in the way the trip was handled. "and that I would be dropping his things off at his place. "and leaving his keys with the neighbor. "He called but didn't leave any messages, "and then he messaged me that he didn't understand. "The rest of the week, he called and messaged me, "but I couldn't bring myself to pick up or text back. "On Thursday, I think that he realized that I was serious, "and he asked me some questions about logistical things.

"I told him which neighbor his key was with, et cetera. "When he got back and saw all the things at his place, "he got pretty frantic and called. "and left me a long message. "I was working all day, "but also I still didn't wanna respond. "He asked me to explain. "because he didn't understand what was going on. "The next day I sent another text making it clear. "that it was over, and he got upset. "and sent me a bunch of texts in a row. "about how he didn't understand why I was throwing away. "that we had built. "He left me a voicemail that was really angry.

"that said he had no idea why I was upset. "and that he did not accept the breakup. "because he had no say in it. "and that he wanted me to tell him the evil story. "that I had made up about him to his face.". - Whoa. - I do not accept. - By the way, you don't have to accept someone's breakup. That's how that works. - He just said, "No." - Oh my god. He said, "No.". - "I wasn't going to respond to him, "and I wanted to remain calm, but this upset me. "So I sat down to write him this letter. "It's long, so skip over if you want.".

- No. - "I tried to call him, but I started crying. "and told him I'd just send him an email instead.". - Let's go, - Okay, here's the letter. - I'm so ready. - "The time that we have had apart. "has given me some good space and time to think. "I have had a chance to think about the things. "that are important for me in a relationship, "and I see that we should not be together. "I'm sorry that I've been asking. "for you to change things about your life. "that you shouldn't have to change at my or anyone's behest. "From the very start, "this trip was made in an insanely disrespectful way. "in which it started out from you being given an ultimatum.

"by your female best friend who I had never met. "that either she goes or I go on this trip, "and you picked her. "You didn't offer to have her meet me. "Theoretically, I was your long-term partner, "so this would've made a lot of sense. "You didn't encourage her to find someone else to come, "and you didn't consult me at all. "That's enough for most people. "to have a deal breaker right there. "However, I stayed. "This is a person who you have a history with. "that is not entirely clear to me. "Here's what I understand. "Some bad rumors got started about the two of you. "in which you spent an entire night out with her.

"on an acid trip while you were dating someone else. "Nothing happened. "The other thing I understand is that you were interested. "in her romantically at some theoretically other point, "and that she started dating her boyfriend, "and that closed the door on things for you. "According to what I understand, it took a long time. "for her boyfriend to feel comfortable. "with you being around, but you apparently worked. "to ultimately make him feel comfortable with you. "after I'm not sure how long. "This is the completely unknown person who shut me out. "of a trip that I was originally going to go on,

"unilateral decision. "You did not tell me this was happening. "until I asked when the trip to Hawaii would be. "You purchased tickets. "in another very disrespectful situation, "which I have cooked dinner and have guests present, "and you choose to go into my room. "for well over an hour to select tickets with her, "and in which I repeatedly asked you. "to please come to dinner. "because you say it will just be a few more minutes. "each time. "There's absolutely no reason for doing it at that time. "and in that situation, "seeing as how she's in the same time zone as us.

"and has a 9:00 to 5:00 job. "This makes me feel sick to my stomach. "So to make myself feel better about this whole arrangement, "I tell you that I wanna meet this person. "On my request, we arrange a trip to go meet her. "and her boyfriend. "A brief trip in which they are, and you explicitly agree, "inexplicably cold. "The first conversation that we have. "is one in which she and her boyfriend argue. "about how she DM'd him. "while he was already in a relationship. "and got him to date her instead. "You tell me about conversations. "that she has had with you recently.

"in which it seems implied. "that there is some real instability. "in their long-term relationship, stuff about kids and dogs. "I have a discussion in which I let you know. "that I see that and that it worries me. "Meanwhile, I'm still wanting all of this to work out. "for you and for me and for her. "I, at this point, am planning on being with you. "for the long term and see no benefit in telling you. "not to go on a trip with your best friend. "I want it to work out, "but each and every interaction surrounding this trip. "chips and chips and chips away at my ability to handle it. "The conversations that seem to go nowhere, et cetera.

"Your dad, your mom, "and your grandparents are all very surprised. "when we tell them about this trip. "It is becoming very obvious that it is a dangerous trip. "to make with the fragility of our relationship.". - Oof. - "We had only been together for nine months. "How long did it take before her boyfriend. "was comfortable with you hanging around, "much less going on. "one-on-one international tropical vacation. "in which he was uninvited because of your request.". - Ooh. - "We go over it with a friend at the rock climbing gym. "We go over it in the car. "We go over it while we're booking our Airbnb.

"for Copenhagen. "We go over it when I tell you. "that I still feel uncomfortable. "and I do not feel good about the trip. "Talk about repeatedly saying something. "Although I ask for you to help me, "you actually ask me instead to come up with. "what would make me feel better. "Surprisingly, I have no other ideas. "Ultimately, it appears that the original plan. "to meet at my place and hang out and do a game night. "before you two go on the trip has been canceled, "and she will be staying at my place. "but not hanging out with us at all beforehand. "You attribute it to you not bringing it up.

"with her early enough. "This is apparently not something that was discussed. "even two nights before the trip. "This upsets me. "You do not know what to do. "I don't blame you at this point. "It was well out of hand. "I don't know what to do either. "There is no good solution that I can think of. "besides waiting for the trip to be over. "I'd tell you that either I have to go, get over it, "or I have to break up with you, "and that I don't wanna break up with you, "but my ability to get over this. "is rather, rather worn down. "She arrives at my place very late, "and we wake up to the next morning.

"for me to take you two to the airport. "After all of this lead up, "I know that you can tell how unhappy I am. "I fully absolutely know you can tell how unhappy I am. "You leave. "And when I don't respond to your texts, "you text me to tell me that you hope I'm okay. "and you're going to bed. "No call. "The rest of the week was rough. "My text to you was met with essentially, "'I'm sorry you feel this way.'. "You tell me that I'm being unfair. "There is no acknowledgement and there still has been none. "that this trip to a (beep) honeymoon destination, "as we have discussed before, "could be a crazy and horrible thing to go through with,

"even with my quasi blessing. "This is not something. "that people in relationships have to deal with. "This is not something. "that people in relationships do besides her, I guess. "In the end all this is to say. "that I have felt serious emotional needs go seriously unmet. "in a way that is a deal breaker for me. "It seems like trying to convince someone. "to like different food. "or to have a different favorite color. "I am not happy in this, "and I do not wanna feel these feelings any longer. "There is no need for this to be mutual. "I do not need your permission to break up with you.

"He wrote back.". And that's the end of the-. - Wow. She laid it all out. - And she didn't owe him shit. - No, she didn't. - I think, sadly, I'm getting the impression. that he has walked all over her for months. - No. 100%. - I don't think she's-. - If she was even in a place. where she quasi accepted this shit-. - Yeah. I feel like she was never given a place. to really truly like voice her concerns,

and she wasn't able to like actually talk it out. until he was gone. - And the fact that he was saying like, "I don't accept this breakup". means he thought that would work. - Right. - And that's the place that they were at. - Well, he thinks she's crazy. Like, he doesn't understand. He like doesn't understand the situation. - I think this is actually a case of real gaslighting. where he's trying to convince her like, "This is a normal thing and you're being weird.". - Right. - Like, this situation's (beep) nuts. and everyone would agree it's (beep) nuts.

She's in a place where she is thinking, "Am I crazy for-". - Yeah, no, she's been slowly conditioned over time. - I guess people do this. It's like, no, this is not normal. - Yeah. - If a friend of mine told me about this, I'd be like, "Oh, so you guys are already broken up.". - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - So you guys are breaking up or broken up. All right, there's a couple last things here. - Let's hear it. - "He wrote me back an apologetic email. "in which he accepted responsibility for most things. "without any argument, "except he denied anything that had to do. "with his relationship with her. "making me feel uncomfortable. "And he denied that I would not be able.

"to handle their relationship. "He said that the only thing that made their trip bad. "for me was my own perspective. "I wrote him back that trust has to be built. "and that he put too much strain too early on. "in a relationship in which he had not developed that trust. "He agreed and apologized. "For me, it ended on a pretty amicable note, "but this style of relationship really doesn't work for me, "and I don't feel like his response to me really healed. "or changed anything significantly. "I stand by my decision at this point.". The hint, she gave so much context there of like,

yeah, it's been hinted at. that you guys have had weird things in the past. that you felt romantically towards her. It's like, yeah, no dude, you're in love with her. And you can't be in a relationship. until either you cut contact with this girl or you move on. - I mean, if he was a good communicator. and not a piece of shit, like you could work your way through it. You could be like, "Hey, I had this history with her. "I know this might make you feel uncomfortable.

"We're gonna go on this trip altogether. "with this other person.". And like there's a way to work through it. He basically like at every fork in the road. where they're like, you could do the right thing or the wrong thing, he's like, "That wrong thing seems easier.". - Yeah. - That seems easier to me. - Yeah. - Like, I think he's, I mean he's definitely like to a degree a manipulator. - Totally. - At the very least, like yeah, manipulator. At the very worst, a gaslighter, abuser. You know, like I think...

I also just don't think he is like even aware. Like, I don't think he's like totally honest with himself. about what his motivations are. - Or he's in severe denial. - Yeah, that's what I'm thinking as well. But I'm sorry, there's some wording in his response. Did he say that OP can't comprehend or handle, like, I'm sorry that you can't handle our relationship. or something. What did he say? - Yeah. "He denied anything that had to do.

"with his relationship with her making me feel uncomfortable. "and he denied that I would not be able. "to handle their relationship.". - Oh. - So he denied that she can't handle that relationship? - He feels comfortable that he can dictate her emotion. - So he's again saying like, "No, you don't need, like, you don't,". he's literally trying to be like, "You don't have a problem with this.". Like a Jedi. - It sounds, by her wording, yeah. That's my grasp of it. That's crazy. Also, I, okay, unrelated but related.

I feel like a tropical vacation. or a lot of vacations are where a third wheel, I don't think is that awkward. - Oh, I mean, yeah. If you know each other that well though. - Well, 'cause like a resort or something. is something where it's like, if someone's like, "Hey, can I tag along?". - Yeah. - I'll go do my own thing a lot of the time. - Love that journey. - Like, I could see myself if someone was like, "Hey, we have an extra ticket, "or do you wanna buy an extra ticket to this resort?". I'd be like, "(beep) yeah, dude. "Like, you guys have your romantic getaway, "and I'll be by the beach. "Pina colada.". - I went to a friend's wedding,

and I stayed with a friend of mine. that was dating another person, and it was totally fine. Like, it was in Hawaii, so it was tropical. And yeah, I did some stuff on my own. We went on like a hike and stuff, like... - Depends on like what their intention is on the vacation. If it's a random vacation. and you're just all going to relax, I don't think it's that big of a deal. Like, it's so easy to like split up for days. - When all parties are sane, you're correct. - It's very clear there's definitely some unspoken things.

or maybe spoken between the two of them. - Yeah, no, it seems like you're both right, where it's like this friend. doesn't like him dating other people. I think she, and I try not to be like too mean about this, but it's like this friend clearly like thrives. kinda stringing this guy along. - Totally. - And then he is totally in denial of his feelings. But it seems like he's just like frothing at any opportunity. to be close to this friend.

- Well, yeah, 'cause the friend controls him. He feels he can control his partner now. - Yeah. - It's a whole bunch of unhealthy mess. - Yeah, no, clearly OP was like really conditioned over time. to his plane of reality. by slowly like thinking it's okay to be walked all over. And like that sucks, and I hope, I bet you she's learned a lot since then. - Yeah, I hope, she can move her boundaries so much further. - Oh yeah. - Because she writes out this letter, and I'm like, one of these things is enough.

- Yep. - You needed to have all of them listed out. - It'd be like, okay, so the trip's not happening, like the trip's not happening, and we should talk, and we should figure this out. - Yeah. (beep). - And in what world do you boot, literally you got booted. She didn't even get told she was uninvited. - Until she asked about it. And she was informed. - That is crazy. - He's like, "What're you talking about?". - That's not happening. - That's not happening with you. - Oh yeah, crazy story. - You don't feel bad. You don't feel bad. All right, moving on. - I think the moral of the story is just don't date a guy.

that's 25. - All right, moving on to our last story here. "Am I the asshole for kicking my friend. "out of my vacation house in a foreign country?". - Ooh. - Okay, here we go. "English is not my first language, "so please excuse my poor grammar. "My family owns property in a tropical destination. "that is very popular this time of year. "My friends and I, all girls in our early 20s, "have been talking about going to my parents' house. "for years.

"And this January was finally the season. "everything was aligning in our favor. "An acquaintance of mine, Jessica, "who is part of our larger group of friends, "heard about the upcoming trip and asked to join us. "I was reluctant at first, "but she kept publicly insisting on it. "by saying that visiting this place. "was one of her childhood dreams, "and it put me in an awkward position to say no. "We then add her to our travel group chat. "and go over everything. "that was already decided on our itinerary. "and how much money we were planning on spending. "on this trip. "She seemed excited about it.

"and didn't wanna change anything. "Great. "Unfortunately, things started to go south. "the moment she arrived here. "Jessica bought a different flight from everyone else. "and would arrive at 3:00 AM. "I told her that she could either get a taxi to my house. "or wait at the airport until 10:00 AM. "when I would drive by to pick everyone else up. "She was not happy with that. "and was very passive aggressive for the rest of the day. "She then started to complain about our itinerary, "how everywhere we picked was too expensive, "and she felt excluded and judged by the people there. "We tried to compromise. "and did a few touristy things with her,

"but when we started getting ready. "to go to a beach club yesterday, she threw a fit. "I reminded her that she knew about all of this. "before buying tickets. "and that she wasn't forced to join us. "She could stay home and eat food. "my parents kindly stocked for us. "or walk around the city center. "When we come back home, "I'm flooded with messages from our mutual friends. "asking why I'm being so mean to poor Jessica. "Apparently she took it to social media. "and created a narrative that she's a victim. "and we're bullies. "I was sick of it.

"We had a fight where she called me terrible things. "I wasn't a perfect angel either, to be frank. "And it ended with her being kicked out. "So Reddit, am I the asshole?". - Whoa. - Whoa, bro. (Ian laughs). - Ooh, man. Look, I... I do understand Jessica's situation. Like, it's definitely like when you feel like you, when you have like less disposable income. out of everyone in the group-.

- Is that what was prefaced? - I mean, that's what it sounds like. - Well, what... "Jessica, who is a part of our larger group of friends, "heard about the upcoming trip and asked to join us.". I think it's then like learned. that she clearly doesn't have as much money as the rest. And the rest sound like very like, kind of like come from wealthy family homes. - Or they had been planning on this for years. and were saving up. Like, I don't wanna assume that. - We can't really know.

What I think the criteria of what's being talked about here. is that where I think Jessica is an asshole from the start. is that if I hear about a bunch of people planning a trip. and they planned a trip together, I'm not gonna be like, "Can I join your trip?". - [Ian] Yeah. - I would never do that. I'm like, I think you're an asshole. I think you-. - I might do it. If it's good enough, I might do it. (everyone laughs). - No. I think it's fair to ask to join. And like, I will say, OP, the way that this person wrote this story was events.

She didn't preface that Jessica is a shitty person. She only stated the events, what happened, admitted that she was hesitant. but didn't smear Jessica's name in any way. It was purely these events and like-. - Yeah. I think she's being fair. - Yeah. And I think also like showing like the itinerary, like she should have an understanding. of like what the costs are. And if you sign onto a trip. and you don't wanna spend all that money,

just opt out of certain things, but don't guilt people for going and be like-. - But is it the money that's the issue? It sounds like-. - "She then started to complain about our itinerary, "how everywhere we picked was too expensive, "and she felt excluded and judged by the people there.". - Ah. Okay, I missed that. - But the itinerary was known to her before. - Yeah. - They had the whole thing laid out. But then once she got there, she started to complain about it. - Right, right. - No, if you have a problem with it, say it before you go on the trip. But you did join the trip last.

- Yeah. - Very late. - And you begged. You were publicly asking all the time. And you get on it, and then you asked to change the trip around. It's like, does it suck? Like, I would feel bad. I have friends who go on trips that I can't afford, but I wouldn't ask to go on it and then ask to change it. - Right. No, I think in this case, they're both assholes in their own way. I mean, I think it's unreasonable. to invite yourself to a trip and then be the problem.

Like, say like, "Guys, like I know you have this whole...". They literally had an itinerary. - Yeah. - And they're following the itinerary, and she's saying, "I can't do that. "You're making me feel bad. "I can't do that.". - Yeah, and if that was a concern from the start, when she agreed and said, "You can come on this trip, "but here's our itinerary. "Is this itinerary okay with you? "Do you have any problems with this itinerary?". - And like if you do, like opt out of those specific things. And yeah, go to the town center. I'm sure that's very lovely.

- Yeah. Similar to the third wheel thing, man, like, I'd be okay if I was going on a trip with people. who are gonna go like, "We're gonna go to this expensive beach club.". And I'm like, "I'm gonna hang out at the beach house.". - Yeah. - And I'm gonna vibe here. Or yeah, I'll walk around the city or something. - Yeah, I will say like different when it's a woman. in your early 20s in a country. - Totally. - Jessica in my opinion was an asshole, but you can't kick someone out of a house. in another country. - I agree with that. - That's where I do agree OP is an asshole,

because, now we don't get any context. after she kicks her out, what that looks like, whatever. But yeah, just making them have zero place to stay. in a foreign country, and they're a woman in their young 20s. - Who's already complaining about money. - You're an asshole no matter what in that situation, unless she's trying to stab someone. because yeah, you're putting her in immediate danger. - Yeah, and so that's why I also understand why Jessica. was like bummed that they weren't changing the itinerary. in her favor because she didn't wanna go do these things.

by herself. But like she agreed to the itinerary. - And she also talked shit about them on social media. - Yeah. That's wild. - That's also shitty. - That's a whole other bag. - What upsets me about this post though. is that the context we need. is the part that she summarizes super quickly. She's talked about all this preface, and then she goes, "I was sick of it. "We had a fight where she called me terrible things.". And then in parentheses she goes, "I wasn't a perfect angel either, to be frank. "And it ended with her being kicked out.". I'm like, I need to know what happened.

Your post is about am I the asshole for kicking her out. You exclude the part where you kick her out. So I actually don't know what's going on. Is Jessica an asshole? Yes. I do think she's an asshole. But I need to be there to see what this looks like, what kicking her out looks like. Because yeah, a woman, a young woman in a foreign country, in a city she doesn't know, out with no place to stay, that's bad. - Not ideal. - The verdict though was not the asshole,

'cause I think people are focused mostly. on what's going on. - Jessica's actions. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - "Absolutely not the asshole, "and it's time to tell the real truth. "to everyone ganging up on you. "She created her own problems and tried to blame you. "She can just get herself back home.". Someone said, "Not the asshole. "I'm so glad that this is a story. "where people don't put up with obnoxious, selfish bullshit. "Kudos to you. "It is always best to trust your gut feeling. "But after all is said and done, "I think you handled this like a champ.". Someone else said, "What happened to her after you kicked her out?".

OP said, "From what I know, "she slept in a hotel close to the airport. "and left the country earlier today. "She left my house in a cab that I paid for.". - Okay. - Okay. - If they got her a cab, if she got a cab to a hotel near the airport. and they knew where she was going, then it's like, all right, then you're kicking her out with the intention. of making sure she safely flies back home. - Sure. - It's like, all right, then you're fine. I still wanna know like what that fight was like. - There's even more than that that I wanna know also.

because like why was all of this put on OP. when all of the friends were there seeing this happening? I think it was-. - 'Cause it was her parents' house. - It's her parents' beach house. - Yeah, it's her parents' house. But like all of these friends. had been planning this together. They were all there in that group chat. when Jessica agreed to all this stuff. - Yeah. - And then the fact that the fight was between them two. It like-. - I suspect they were all talking shit about her. You know, like I'm sure they all went to the beach house. without her and then saw the social media posts.

And I'm sure, the whole situation does seem like it was very slanted. against this woman to where, you know, I think there's a reason. why this social media post happened. I don't think it was just the OP. I think it was probably a lot of the group. - Probably. But again, it's like she literally had everything on paper. that she was signing up for, Jessica did. - Yeah. - And they were like, "Here's how much money we're planning on spending.".

Like, 'cause I have friends who they do that stuff. Like, they have a Google sheet with each spending. of what we're planning at each night at each place. - Right. - And that's what everyone is prepared to contribute. - No, Jessica's ridiculous. Like, I can fully agree. If you don't want someone on your trip, you gotta (beep) set that line. Just say no, man. Save yourself all this shit. 'Cause it sounds like they didn't like her from the get-go. - Larger friend group. - Oh, did this behavior just appear out of nowhere? Or was this person annoying before?

- That's what I feel like is at play too. - It's not hard to be like, "Sorry, we actually booked up all the rooms. "at the beach house.". - Yeah, that's what I was gonna say. Like, it's like, just like, "Oh, sorry, like we've already planned it all out. "that we can't fit another person into the thing.". - Update. (Courtney gasps). - Oh. - "Even though I was mainly judged not the asshole, "I felt bad about the way I handled it. "Like, many of you pointed out, "it's my fault for allowing her to come in the first place. "This country and specifically this specific location. "is considered safe, but it's not idiot proof. "Something bad could have happened,

"and I would've blamed myself for it. "I decided to be the bigger person. "and contacted Jessica earlier today. "after dropping my friends off at the airport. "Our talk went really well. "She explained that in the beginning, "she was looking forward to our plans. "She wanted to experience the glitz. "and glamour of the destination. "In her head, she would go to the beach clubs with us, "guys would offer to buy her drinks, "and ask her out to dinner. "so she wouldn't have to pay for any of it.". - Stop, stop. This girl's delulu. - Okay, all right. Let's hear her out.

Free drinks and food, okay? - "Unfortunately, reality didn't play out like that. "And she started to grow resentful. "whenever one of us would get male attention.". - Oh. - "The final straw. "was when I wouldn't let her borrow a wetsuit from me. "when we went scuba diving. "She wouldn't fit on any of our extras, "and I didn't want them to stretch or break. "She said that it triggered her imposter syndrome. "and body dysmorphia, "so she didn't want to go to hotspots with us. "as it was affecting her mental health. "I told her that while I understand where she's coming from,

"I hope she realizes that my friends and I. "are not in the wrong for sticking to our original itinerary. "and not catering to her insecurities. "We didn't bully her once. "And slandering us on social media for her own issues. "was unacceptable and unhinged. "She genuinely apologized for her behavior, "and she knew she was in the wrong. "I also apologized for kicking her out. "in the heat of our fight and offered to pay for her hotel. "and any fees she had to pay. "in order to anticipate her flight. "She thanked me. "and said that she would request the payment on a money app. "Everything was going well.

"until I saw the request for 5,000 euros. "What? "I texted her asking if this was the right amount. "She said yes. "I asked for receipts. "She didn't have any. "I asked for bank statements or any sort of proof. "She got angry. "and went back to being her rude, irrational self. "I blocked her everywhere, "and I won't talk to her ever again.". - Wow. - Why did you have to end with this story? I feel bad now. - That's so funny. - [Ian] I feel bad about everything. - Everything was good, and then it wasn't good. - Oh my god. - Some people suck, and it sounds like Jessica sucks.

You know, I felt bad for Jessica. All that stuff, I'm like, hey, that's all real. - No, I did. I was like, damn, this is like sad. - That's sad. - Yeah, it is sad. And it's like unfortunate. that she made the friends the enemy. in that situation for herself. That really sucks, 'cause if OP's telling the truth. and they really didn't bully her once. and they were just sticking to their itinerary-. - 5,000 euros? What the hell? - Did she just think she could just get away with that? - I don't know, man. That's just insane.

Look, it was a really expensive hotel. - By the airport. - And like she apologized. But all those reasons were reasons. that she didn't communicate to the friends at all. - Yeah. - So it's like, okay, but if you're going through something. and you don't tell anyone, then it's not their responsibility. - And then she took it to social media. She didn't even do an Am I The Asshole post. - Look, the solution that she's come to of just like, "I'm gonna block this person from my life" is the answer. - Yeah. - Sadly. But they're young. People when they're young are going through shit. Hopefully like in a few years...

- But the money thing. - The money thing is so shitty. - That's like, that's a situation where I'd be like, "Oh, I can never trust you.". - Yeah. - You're literally just-. - Am I even a person? - And being like, "Can I see receipts?". "No, I don't have any.". It's like, all right. - I think the one thing that I have learned in life. and also is clear in these. is like vacations are big like learning moments. or make or break moments. in a lot of different relationships. - Oh yeah. - Like, it is the time where you see if you're compatible.

with your partner, it is the time where you truly see how easygoing. or tough your friends are. Like, it is the time. - Yeah. It's very true. - It is. Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - You guys wanna go on a vacation? - Yes. - Let's go on a vacation. - Third wheel it? - The three of us, yeah. - Yeah! - Let's (beep) go. - I think I'd be a great third wheel. I think I'm a great third wheel. - I think you are. - I actually think you are. - Okay. Let's go. - All right. - Let's go. - Where are you guys going next? I'll go. - Let's go to Antarctica.

- Okay. I'm gonna need $5,000. (everyone laughs). - Actually, you probably would for that. (everyone laughs). All right, guys, thank you for watching. Let us know if you've had any nightmare vacation stories. And let us know what other themes. and subreddits you'd wanna see on this show. Thank you both for being here. - Thanks for having us. - [Shayne] Yeah. - Appreciate you. - I hope you guys have many great vacations. - Don't forget your life jacket. - Don't forget your life jacket. All right, we'll see you later. - Guys, okay, everybody. HAGS. Have a good summer, guys. HAGS.

- Have fun in the sun. Get laid in the shade. - Nice.