A New Level Of Entitlement | Reading Reddit Stories
- Hello and welcome to "Smosh Reads Reddit Stories.". I'm Shayne and today's theme is entitled. And I am joined by two of the most entitled people. I know, Angela and Olivia. - Do you want a matcha or? - Can I get two drinks? - Yeah. - Because I can't decide if I want to do. a cold beverage or-. - You want hot and cold? - Hot and cold so I can fuck up my stomach. - Yeah, yeah, let's do that. Here, what are you thinking? - [Olivia] Ooh, just steamed milk? - Oh yeah, just a cup of, we'll get that for him, a cup of steamed milk. - I think he'd probably want. the 16 ounce of steamed milk.
- No, but for real, do you want anything? We're going to place the order. and maybe it comes in time for the end of the episode. - I'll just get an espresso. - You want, we can just make that here. - I know, but like there's the-. - Yeah, okay. - They do like a ristretto style, like. - Whoa, you can add a shot of maple pancake. - Oh, or cranberry. - Or cupcake. - Wait, what the- - Apple? - Wait, what if we just added that into your-. - Okay, I'm adding that to the cart. What do you want? Seriously. - Okay, seriously? - Is this a tad entitled? - It's a tad entitled.
(Olivia grumbling). Actually, do they just do like straight up matcha? Like a hot matcha. - Yeah, yeah. A hot matcha. I got you. - Hot matcha. - Well, yeah. - Like a matcha Americano? - Yeah, can I get a matcha Americano actually? Could you swap out, get rid of the espresso too? - Yeah, yeah, I got you. - People are listening- - Because that'll give me. energy throughout the day. - Yeah, yeah. - A matcha, hot Americano. You want some ice in it? Eight ounce or 12 ounce? - I think I want just hot. - You just want hot? - Just a hot. - I'm gonna give you. organic ceremonial matcha, okay. - We have to go quicker. - All right. All right. You want any milk, right? No milk? - No milk. - Gosh, they don't have coconut milk? That's so- - So we have some entitled.
stories today. (producers laughing). - We're ready. - Okay. - We're so ready. Hey. - How do you feel, do entitled people piss you off? - Yes. - Yes. - We live in LA, which is kind of the hub. - [Angela] Yeah. - I think entitlement's pretty like pervasive, like I think it's everywhere. - Yeah. - Like I feel like everyone's always saying like, "Oh, this generation's entitled, this generation's entitled. This country's entitled, like, this state is entitled.". I'm like, I think it's kind of all over the place. - I think it's all ages, all cultures. - Yeah. - It's all over.
All genders. - I can't speak. for the whole world, but I do think America, like we're such an individualistic country. that it's kind of like pushed on us culturally. - Yeah, when you guys experience like entitlement. amongst your friends, how do you guys react to that? - (sighs) That's tough. I think if it's someone, I think I try to like gently be like, "Well, you know, it's okay.". Like, oh, maybe we should, like, ah, you know, everything's fine, like, ah. - Well, I mean, like, devil's advocate here, I would say, you know, like, that's really it. - Yeah. - Yeah. Yeah.
- I try to check myself a lot. Like especially in places. where I think people are very entitled, like airports, restaurants and stuff. I try to like be like, oh, like I understand that, you know, the waiter's going through a hard time, or like, oh, the person behind the service desk is, they're having a day. Like, so I'm not thinking I'm deserving of it. - Oh, my friends who are visiting here from Europe, they were driving and they're like, wow, the fact that, you know, if I let someone go,
they don't wave thank you or any of that. They're just like shocked. They're like, you know, in London, people are like very polite. or at least like gesture thank you, not entitled to rush, you know, to get on the road or like-. - That is true. Like when I have my blinker on and I get through. and they let me in, I don't really, unless it's like a really tight spot, I go, thank you. - Yeah. - You want to know what's funny? - I'm entitled. - Sometimes I get. more mad at polite drivers in LA. - Oh, yeah.
- When you're trying to, okay, you're trying to turn out into a road-. - Yeah. - And there's cars going by both ways and a car stops, there's no stop sign, they stop and they go, and I'm like, (beep) you, there's cars, there's cars in the other lane. - What? But that's nice. - You're trying to get me T-boned. Like they're being so nice. I'm mad at them because I'm just like being at, like, if we all just drive as fast as we can, I will find the opening myself. Let me do the work. - This is what my friends were talking about. There's no courtesy. - There isn't, but sometimes the problem. is when in general there's no courtesy,
when someone's courteous, it disrupts the flow. - Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. - I'm like, no, we're all, let's all be discourteous so that-. - Oh, like that one friend, so like some friend groups will wait. for everyone's food to get there, and that one friend will be like, "I'll wait.". So you go, well, then (beep) me, I'm gonna (beep). - We gotta wait. We all got to wait. - Well, we should all wait. - Yeah. - Okay, speaking of wait, let's start. - All right. Let's begin. Our first entitled story. comes from Am I The Asshole? It was posted in April of 2026. They write, "Am I the asshole for refusing. to give a micro-influencer free coffee upgrades.
after she tried to get me fired? I, a 22-year-old woman, work as a barista at a small local coffee shop. We have this regular, Megan, late 20s, who has like 15,000 Instagram followers. She comes-" - How much? How much? - 15,000. - Okay, copy. - "She comes in almost every day, orders this super complicated latte, then asks for extra syrup, oat milk, and whipped cream for free. because she promotes the shop on her stories. My boss has no formal deal with her, so technically it's against policy.
I've let it slide a few times when it was slow, but last Saturday we were slammed, line out the door, two call-outs, and I was solo on bar. Megan orders, I ring her up normally, 6.75, and she goes, 'Just add the oat milk. and vanilla for free like usual.'. I told her I couldn't today. because my manager was watching the cameras, true, and I'd already been warned about giving freebies. She got really snotty and said, 'Fine, I'll just take my business elsewhere,'. then pulled out her phone and took a photo. of me mid-reach for a cup.
Before I could even say anything, she posted on her story, 'Shop name has the worst service. Barista,' named my name.". - No! - "'Was so rude for no reason, don't go here.'. Within a few hours, her followers. left three one-star Yelp reviews. specifically naming me, and two people came into the shop demanding discounts. because, according to them, they saw what I did. My boss reviewed the security footage, laughed and told me I did nothing wrong, but now a couple of my coworkers. say I should have just given her the 150 upgrade. to avoid the drama and the bad press.
The owner is staying out of it, but Megan keeps commenting on our Instagram posts with, 'Remember when your staff harassed me?'. I feel like I was just doing my job. enforcing a policy she knew about, but the shop lost a few regulars who saw her story, so maybe I should have just let it go. Am I the asshole?". - No. - Oh God. - You're not the asshole. What's Megan's handle on Instagram? - Oh my God. (producers laughing). Let's go put one stars in her comments. - Yeah. - Yeah. Let's get her canceled.
(producers laughing). I wonder how often just regular businesses. are dealing with influencers-. - Micro-influencers. - And micro-influencers. I mean, there's just so many. - Back in the day, "Ratatouille," the guy, the biggest antagonist is that food reviewer, and now it's influencers. - Okay. Can I just say something? - But it sucks. It sucks. - I'm sorry, okay, and I might have been... You know (beep) how lucky we are to be influencers? Like our job is not hard, like at all.
And you get to go and get coffee, and you (beep) put cupcake syrup in your coffee, like-. - I didn't, I got maple pancake. (producers laughing). - Like you are so privileged and entitled. and like, what are you doing? Get a (beep) life. - Get her. - Kill her. - You know back in the day-. - Get up. Get up. - People went to harvest. their coffee beans. They had to go and get (beep) plant. and, you know. - They had to go get it. - And yeah, you know? So you are a little bitch!
- Yeah. It is very funny like- - Sorry. - I love you. - I'm sorry. - It is very funny being in the category of influencer, but when I'm online and I see like influencers. getting trashed and like- - Oh yeah. - Made fun of 'em, like, (beep) yeah, just (beep) get them. - Yeah. - Because I think the majority. of the influencer culture. is just absolutely horrible for everything. It is sad because like we've kind of lost. the like, the critic. Like that used to be a like profession-. - Yeah. - Right? And now we just have like-. - (beep) Megan. - Some dude who's like,
"Yeah, I review movies.". It's like, what are your, like, oh, you're just a guy. - No, truly. - And like, I'm like a follower account. does not equate to any sort of expertise. - I went to Sundance this past year. and my friend's partner was reviewing movies. for an indie publication online. And they would have to like immediately get home. and write because the Letterboxd reviews. come in so fast and people like, it's just like a whole different thing. that you don't really need a degree to rate something.
and it'd be loudly heard. - Sure. Sure. - There's Pauline Kaels everywhere now. - Literally. - And there's value to like mass like, like Yelp reviews, right, of just being like, what's the regular person? But I think there is also like, who is this person, right? - Yeah. - Who is this Megan? - Just because she has 15,000 followers. doesn't mean she understands coffee. better than anybody else, like. - Also, I have a lot of friends. that work in the restaurant industry, and Yelp for all businesses is, it's massive. It's like our IMDB.
It's like, but it is like people get catty. and then people name names. - Yeah. - Oh yeah. - And then there's fake Yelp and then people, some restaurants buy Yelp reviews that are bots. And it is so crazy. Every time I go to a restaurant, and this maybe just shows I don't think of myself. as an influencer because if I love it, I go on the Yelp. because I don't post on my Instagram story. because I'm not going to get all these people. to come to the restaurant. - Oh, you write. reviews on Yelp? - I will, if I really love-. - Yelp will be truly like-. - They are so grateful.
when you give them five stars on Yelp. or anything like that because it is like LinkedIn. for small businesses and they really use it. - And it is sad when you, it is funny, like I'll check Yelp reviews. and you can tell when it's like, I think I'm pretty good at sussing out when I'm like, oh, this person isn't really reviewing. because they didn't like, this person's being an asshole. - [Angela] Yeah. - And they're being entitled, 'cause that, yeah, they throw out names. - [Angela] Yeah. - The way they're complaining is like confusing. - [Angela] Yeah. - You can tell like real critique, I feel like. - It's also really messed up that this person. took a picture of OP.
- Oh, dude. - That's like- - What an asshole. - That's a whole other level too. - This episode of "Reddit Stories". is sponsored by Zocdoc. I had a situation where I really needed a doctor. in a specialized field, and I knew urgent care wouldn't get me the answers I needed. So I called my doctor. and the next appointment time was months away. That was so stressful, and I needed answers sooner, which is why I now use Zocdoc. Zocdoc lets you search. and compare local in-network doctors. I can find healthcare that's right for me. and that fits my schedule.
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Anyways, your health matters. and taking care of yourself shouldn't be complicated. Find and book the right doctor with Zocdoc. Head to Zocdoc.com/pitreddit to get started. and check that appointment off your to-do list. That's Zocdoc.com/pitreddit. (upbeat music). (laughs) Back to the show. A button! - I know I just yelled at you, Megan, but I do think that there is, if you do watch this, you can learn and grow from it.
People can grow. People can grow. - You're coming down and you're like, "I'm so sorry.". - Look, I'm sorry but-. - And you know-. - Let's get a cup of coffee. - Maybe if enough people are like, because this isn't like a major, like you're not like a bad person. I don't know. But it's not like maybe enough people be like, "Hey, like that wasn't cool,". and she'll like learn from this experience. - Yeah. - I am blown away and I've heard of it many times. in our industry of people expecting free shit.
I'm just like, what the (beep)? - I don't get that. - I don't get it at all either. It's also like, hey, your entire platform is built on coffee, and yet you are not trying. to support the coffee business that-. - Yeah. - That gives you your business. - Yeah. - I'm like, I don't know. It's so shitty. Verdict, there's no official one as of yet, but it's leaning towards not the asshole for the barista. - I think Olivia gave you an official. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't see how the barista.
could possibly be the asshole here. - No way. - For doing business as usual. Comments, "Not the asshole. Comment back saying, 'Remember when you were too cheap. to spend $1.50 to pay for your order? I would expect an influencer to be classier.'". Someone said, "Your boss needs to get a backbone. and post the security footage on the company's page. to defend his employee and his business, not the asshole." - Yep. - And someone said, "You never should have. been doing that without permission. from your boss in the first place. Also, this whole situation would've been avoided. if you had not taken it upon yourself.
to decide if it was ever okay in the first place.". I don't know, like I also think baristas constantly like, if you have a regular, you might like toss them something. But like, no, the barista was being a normal barista. - Yes. - And they were doing their job. and being a cool person, and this person's an asshole. - Yeah. - Yep. Agreed. - Very much asshole. - Yeah. I also, it sucks too when someone like is a regular, if we're taking the influencer out of it, but like being a regular is somewhere to a point.
where you might get free stuff sometimes, but that doesn't mean you should start expecting that. - That's so true. - Not at all. - Like it's like, oh, we have a cool rapport. Like sometimes it might happen that's a treat, but never expecting it. - Yes. Especially at like small places like coffee shops. - Dude. - Yeah. - Like what do you-. - Also like, I mean, this is coming from a place of privilege, but I've gotten to the point. where like if there is a small business that I love, I'm like, oh, shit, I'm so, like I want to go there. to give business to like keep this thing afloat.
when there's so many monopolies. and so many big (beep) businesses trampling them. - True. And it's true about managers. He said that, OP said the manager. was like watching on the camera. Funny little side story. - His whole like security footage is just like-. - [Angela] Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Don't worry, I'm on it. - That was a shot of cupcake. - She's entitled. Don't worry about it. - Yeah. Don't worry. (producers laughing). - Spider-Man, what's up? (laughs). - They're in like a trailer in the corner like, "And we're patched in.". - Locked in. - No, but funny story. that happened this weekend. I had maybe two martinis, maybe too many,
and remember, I was obsessed with our waiter, and I was just like, "You're amazing,". and then I went like, "I want to tell your manager.". And then the manager came up being like, "Hey, is everything.". And it wasn't like I was like, "Can I speak to the manager?". - Aw, and you were just like- - And then he came up-. - He's great. - Everyone was like, "What's up?". And I went, "Oh, I didn't mean to like summon you. I just want to say that Dylan. is (beep) crushing it tonight.". - Wait, where was this? - Some restaurant. - Yeah. - But I felt like we went after Reddit Live. Go see it on tour. (producers laughing).
We did this live. and then we got food after, and then I just was like, "This waiter is killing it. He's crushing.". - No, it's like when the food is really good, you're like, "Can I talk to the chef?". - Yeah, they come out and they're like-. - May I speak to the chef? - "I'm so," and you're like, "No, I want to-" - No, no, no. Oh, you're so cute. - Martini swishing around. I just want to say he's great. - This is the best restaurant. - Okay, when I worked at Courage Bagels, I really got a glimpse. of how entitled people can be over bagels. - [Shayne] Oh, dude. - Yeah. - In the morning.
And you're like, "Hey, just bagels. Not that big of a deal.". - Yeah. - And I remember like people just show up. like expecting that like I knew, there's like thousands of orders, that I knew which order they had. and like snatched it out of my hands. and I'm like, that's crazy. Why are we like treating me so-. - I think people do not, they're like, "I am up so early in the morning,". and they're not comprehending. that the worker that they're interfacing with. is also up at the same time of day. - [Olivia] Yes. - [Angela] Yeah, it's true.
- I think about that whenever like I get up early. like to go to the gym. and like the person behind the gym counter, I'm like, "What time did you get here, man?". - Exactly. - Like, Jesus Christ. - I know, my mom was so sweet yesterday. She was like, she called me after work, because my mom is doing stuff here too, like videos and stuff. And then she was like, "Wow,". she was like, "You guys wake up so early.". But she's like, "But think about the crew members. They probably woke up so much earlier than you.". - Yeah. - And then they had to like wrap late and she was like-. - This entire crew around here is like, "Yeah.". - No.
- What do you (beep) think about that, huh? - My mom, my mom was, my mom was fully advocating for you guys. - All of a sudden we're hearing, mm-mm, mm-hmm. - No, Christine was like, "They woke up so early. because when I showed up, they were already there. and they were so nice to me.". - You look over, see a crew member. handing your mom a $20 bill, like. (producers laughing) (Olivia laughing). "Thanks for saying that.". - I feel that way about when, like, if Amanda or Chance gets in their call times an hour later. for another video, I'm like, "Yeah, we've been here since dawn. (producers laughing) (Olivia laughing). Nice of you to join us.
See you doing a board and a half. Yeah, we've been reading Reddit since 6:00 AM.". - Like they're the reinforcements in World War II, and we're like, "We've been here.". - Yeah, yeah. - "We've been here on the front lines.". - I've had four here ube matchas. (producers laughing) (Shayne laughing). - You don't know what we've been through. We must move on. - Yes. - Our next story comes from Am I The Asshole? "Am I the asshole for feeling offended. when a girl covered her drink. while I was talking to her?". (Olivia laughing) (Angela laughing).
- Oh my God! (producers laughing). - Dude. - Oh my God. - Oh my God. - Oh my God. - Okay. (producers laughing) (Angela laughing). "I'm not the most social person, neither am I the nicest guy either, but I've been trying to get better. at talking to people. instead of just sticking with those close to me. There was a cute girl standing by herself for a bit, so I went up, said hey, introduced myself, just normal conversation stuff.
Not long after I started talking, she took out one of those drink covers, the ones with a little hole for a straw. and put it on her cup. She didn't say anything, but it felt pointed, I guess. Like I know that whole thing. is about people being careful with their drinks, but the timing made it feel like it was because of me. It kind of threw me off, so I didn't stay long. I just ended the convo after a minute. and went to talk to someone else. I assumed she wasn't really comfortable. and I didn't want to make it awkward. Later, she came up to me. and asked why I just dipped like that. I said I didn't think she wanted to talk,
especially after she covered her drink. right when I walked up. She got kind of annoyed and said it wasn't about me. and that I made it weird by leaving. That's the part that's confusing me. If it wasn't about me, fine, but at the same time, it felt like a pretty clear signal. and a slap to the face, so I backed off. Now I feel like it was a damned if you do, damned if you don't situation. Am I the asshole? Edit, a lot of people are focusing. on me saying I was offended. or that it felt like a slap to the face. That was poor wording on my part. (producers laughing).
I wasn't upset at her for protecting herself. It was more that I felt awkward. and like I might have made her uncomfortable.". - Sure. "So I took it as a cue to back off. I understand why women take those precautions. and I'm not judging her for it. This is to avoid having to make the same clarification. over and over in the comments.". Okay. All right. - Did he like approach her like this? (groans). - Well, hello, my lady. (producers laughing). - I have a little pill. - He goes, he goes, he goes, "One blue one, one red one. Hey.".
- He walked up like Morpheus. and he was just like, "Oh, yes." (laughs). Okay, my take is like, I'm like, yeah, she might have covered her drink. because you're a guy at a bar. Like, that's the unfortunate reality. I'm like, you're a stranger. She doesn't know who you are. You can't, like, you wrote offended. and you wrote slapped in the face, so if you're wording it poorly, I think you worded it how you felt, and you felt that way.
- Yeah, you're allowed to feel that way. - But you have to understand, she doesn't know you. - Yeah. - Like, this isn't a personal attack. because she doesn't know you. My advice to any person at a bar. by themselves is, yeah, probably cover your drink. no matter who you're talking to. Like I hear these stories all the time in LA. - Yes, yes. - And then he clearly like, I don't know, he dipped. It's like, "Oh, I'm making you uncomfortable.". I'm like, either way, it's just like, I think this is a very normal response.
And also, that sounds like a cool thing to have, a cover for a drink, like drinks spill, maybe she was just, maybe she does that. I don't know. - Yeah, I also thought. for a second when you were reading it, I was like, "Was he spitting?". - That's what I was thinking. - And she was like, "Whoa, let me get an umbrella over here.". - You know what I think? He's a Pisces. Pisces man. (producers laughing). - OP, are you Pisces? - Are you Pisces? - He's Pisces? - He's Pisces. - Pisces. - Also, she's talking to him, maybe she's engaged in the conversation.
That also means like she may not be viewing him. as a threat, but if you have a drink at a bar, anyone walking by could be the threat. So she's covering it so that. she can really focus and talk to him. - I mean, to me, this is like kind of reminding me. of the early mask back and forth, where it's like people's safety is not about you. - Yeah. - But it is, I understand, this is what happened with the masks too. is people would take it very personally. when people are worried about germs.
And I think especially women in bars. have very specific fears and triggers. And I think those triggers, that person's allowed to do whatever they want, I don't think it's about you. - Not about you. - Yeah, man. - I get it, I kind of get being like a little insecure. - For sure. - Like if someone did that, I'd be like, "Uh-oh, is it about me?". But then I would kind of just kind of, I don't know. I get making it about you for a second, but then to double down, I don't know. - I also just think that if you're a man,
you should know, you should be more aware of the space. that you take in the world. Like at a bar and a girl's alone, yeah, like you should be more aware. that like it's okay, whatever she does, she's just like protecting herself. And maybe there's been a history. of her getting taken advantage of. So just be aware that you're a guy and-. - Yeah, I feel this way a lot about when I am walking. and there's a man, I'm walking by myself.
and there's somebody behind me. - Yes. - I, like, and it has nothing to do with that person. And I feel always bad, like it looks like, but I will stop and let that person go. because I, especially if it's late at night. and I'm by myself walking to my car, I like cannot have that. So I just am like, you know what? I'd rather be safe and be visible on all sides. and just let this person go. But if that person was like, "She hates my vibes.". - No. - I'd be like, "No, I just, I don't think you're gonna (beep) jump me.
and grab all my shit, but I have to prepare for it.". - Well, you know, I brought this up a couple months ago. and Ian and I think was it Chance or someone had, or maybe it was you that had a really great perspective. on this where it's like, if I'm walking behind a woman, I always cross the street, so they don't feel like I'm going to do something. - I really can't do it. when they're really close behind me. I like no matter what I'm like, you cannot be that close behind me.
It freaks me out. And it's like this person might have been freaked out. What I love about the story. is she approached OP and she was like-. - Or he approached her, and then later on she approached him. - No, that's what I'm saying. is she approached him being like, "Did I do something wrong?" - Yeah. - Yeah. - And having that dialogue to be like, "Oh, like, I thought you hated me because you did this.". And she's like, "That has nothing to do.". - Yeah. - Yeah. And he didn't even, let's see, "I said I didn't think she wanted to talk, especially after she covered her drink.
right when I walked up. She got kind of annoyed. and said it wasn't about me, and that I made it weird by leaving.". Yeah, I think he's talking about damned if you do, damned if you don't. It's like the reality is so many men. have done so much horrible shit. that like, yes, women have no choice. but to like be on guard. - Yes. - How many true crime stories. start with this guy approached this woman at a bar? And it's like, that's the scary reality. So I think you have to understand that. And then I think the best bet you can do.
is like if someone communicates. they don't want to talk to you. If they are clearly communicating that, you just are like, okay, I understand, whatever. But he's like making that choice on her behalf. - I also think it's really tricky. when you add like meaning. to people you don't know's actions. - Yeah. - You just met them. - You don't know- - You do not know. - They might, that might just be like, they might be a bit of a germophobe. - Yeah. - Like who (beep) knows, man? Like don't jump into that. Like that's something she already has,
she carries on her. - Yeah. - You know? It's like-. - That's a very specific- - Yeah. - Yeah, and you don't know her, so. - Yeah. - Yeah. The verdict is asshole. Comments, "You're the asshole. Women need to cover their drinks now. because the good guys. and the bad guys, one, all look alike, and two, the good guys don't stop. their coworkers or friends. They laugh at awful jokes. instead of saying, 'That's not cool.'. They don't turn each other in.". And someone responded to that saying, "And those people who seem like nice and good guys. can end up doing absolutely horrible things to you.
Saying this as a woman who learned her lesson. with those types of guys.". Someone said, "You're the asshole. She doesn't know anything about you. Good on her for having the confidence. to take the precaution. Your reaction is a huge red flag.". - Yeah. - Someone said, "You're the asshole. and that's a huge red flag. She wasn't just covering it from you. She was covering it in case someone snuck up. while she was distracted by speaking with you. You know you wouldn't do something sinister, but she does not know that you wouldn't, and the fact that you feel offended. by a girl protecting themselves. from potentially predatory behavior is unsettling.". - Yep.
- Lastly said, "I am a woman, but I felt similarly slighted when an elderly lady. was struggling to get the hood of her car open. When I approached to offer to help, she got in her car and locked it. Then I realized that lady doesn't know me. or what kind of person I am. Better safe than sorry. Best for us not to take it personally.". - Yes. - Yeah. - Yeah, absolutely. - It's not that personal. - I totally agree. with the second story too, with the second comment that-. - Yeah. It is a huge red flag because it's like, okay, do you not understand the like setting, the situation, like the culture.
like of what's going on now? - I mean, that's the mask stuff. People were like, "Wait, you don't feel. comfortable in my house? We're family." - Yeah. - And you're like, "Um, no, this is a little bit bigger than that. ". - Yeah. It's a little scary that in 2026, this guy doesn't understand why women are wary of men. I'm just like in a bar in a public setting-. - That's such a good point. - I'm just like, you know. - He's like, why is she being weird? - Yeah. - Yeah. What's going on? - I feel awkward because you did that. Well, you know what? - It sucks you feel awkward, man. - He's like, "I feel awkward.". Shut the hell up.
- You get in the car with him, you put your seatbelt on, he goes, "What?". (producers laughing). - "Oh, like I'm not a good driver.". - So suddenly you don't feel safe around me. (Shayne laughing). - That's amazing. - That's (beep) good. - That's so good, Ang. (producers laughing). - All right, our next story. Our next story comes from Am I The Asshole? "Am I the asshole for expecting the gifts. to be for both of us?". Okay. Oh, God. - At the baby shower? (producers laughing).
I'm worried. - "I've recently gotten engaged. and have been with my partner for five years. Her family threw us an engagement party this weekend, and when we got home and opened some of the cards, there was money in most of them. I mentioned it was generous of her family to give us so much. and my girlfriend mentioned it was her money. I pointed out it's both of our names on the cards. and the money should be going towards the wedding. or things for both of us. She mentioned that it was her family. that gave it to us, so the money is hers. But I disagreed.
I said the engagement party was for both of us, as are the cards and any gifts we received. I pointed out it's selfish of her. to expect everything to just be for her. She said I was trying to take advantage. of her family's generosity. But I pointed out that's exactly what she's doing. by keeping everything for herself. She just repeated the gifts were from her family, so they should be for her. Am I the asshole for expecting the gifts. to be for both of us?". - I love the entitled stuff. This is juicy. - Ah, that sounds like you shouldn't get married. (Angela laughing) (producers laughing).
- There are so many people out there, just like don't get married. (Angela laughing) (producers laughing). Like don't get married, don't have a wife, don't have a husband. - That's just a. (laughs). - Like, no, seriously, these are things that, you know, they're like little things, but then they're actually big things. And it comes out in different forms. later on in your marriage. And then you know what? You're like too late and then you sleep in separate beds. - I want to know-. - And you're doing crazy shit on the side. - I want to see what does it say on the envelope, OP? I bet on that envelope,
it does not say to just her. That's crazy. - No, he says, he says. that it was addressed to both of them. - Okay, then end of discussion. - Yeah. - It's for both of them. - But also, you're being insane. (laughs). - No, the problem is like, if you are going into marriage. and you have very different views on finances, get the (beep) out. - Yeah. - Get the (beep) out. You can have any sort of agreement, like any sort of like situation is fine. as long as you're both like down with it.
and you've communicated it. This is like top three things. that you communicate before you get married. - Wait, wait, wait. What, what, how do you, okay, how do you bring that up before a marriage? Like how do you talk about finances? - I think you truly, you truly say it. as blatantly as like, it's just like-. - Like, are we 50/50 or are we-. - Just be like, how do we want to organize our finances? - Yeah. - Like how do we feel about this? - Yeah. - Like, I don't think there's any sort of like, like intricate way of like you say it. as plainly as possible, and I think that's the case with everything, right?
It's like, what are our boundaries on this? How do we feel about this and stuff? Like I know it gets brought up a lot on this show, but I'm like, when couples are together for years. and then like a big thing is not talked about, I'm like, you can't wait for these things. to just organically come up sometimes. You know, it's like you have to make the choice. to be like, let's talk about this. - Yeah, yeah. - Yes. And I feel that there are, there are ways you start to like notice each other. and how you handle money and fairness. in terms of like, oh, if he's going to pay the bill.
every time, is she ever going to want... Or like, and everyone has a different opinion on that. But to me, the biggest red flag here. is thinking that the beginning of this chapter. is not about them 50/50. - [Olivia] Yeah. - Like an engagement party. I guess is different than a wedding, but this is honoring the promise. they are making to each other. - [Shayne] Right. - Like, that is not an individual party. Like I don't know where that person's at-. - This isn't a birthday party, this is an engagement party. - Exactly. - Right. Right. - And I'm like, if this is the beginning.
of like a season in which you're celebrating each other. and you're making this about you, it's already not good. - Yeah, it's definitely, it does not bode well. And it doesn't sound like they have mutual respect. for each other because it's like, you would think getting into a marriage it's like, "Oh, I want this for both of us.". - Yes. - So that we can both. - Yeah. - And also you're coming into a wedding. that's going to be the most, it's probably going to be super expensive. It's like, yeah, you probably are going to have. to use that money towards it, or whatever big choices you're making. beginning in your wedding, into your marriage,
if you're still in this place of like, "No, this is mine.". - Yeah. - It's like it doesn't sound like. you're ready to be married. - No. - It sounds like you're still kind of like, like you still should be an individual in a marriage, but it sounds like you're still thinking. like just for yourself. - Yeah. - Right. It's weird. - And that doesn't work. when you're a team. - It doesn't work. in a marriage. - No. I just think it's important. to have agreements, like, right? - Yeah, and communication. - If I met a married couple. and they're like, "Yeah, our agreement is that. whenever we get gifts and it's from, if it's gifts from her family, that's her money.".
- I would go- - "Gift from my family, it's my money.". I'm like, if you both both are cool with that-. - [Angela] Literally. - Then that's your agreement. - I'd go, "That's a weird ass agreement, but I'm glad you guys talked about it.". - I think you both are weird as (beep). - But honestly, the best part about that is-. - I put a cover on my drink. I'm like, "I think you guys are weird.". Move over here. - I don't feel. safe right here. - Well, like, I think that if it's a birthday. or like something where it's just you. and your family's giving you money-. - No. Yeah. - You can keep that. But then if it's like a two people thing-.
- I completely agree with that. That is my logic, right? - No, 100,000%. - I think her logic is odd to me. I'm just saying, like, in the spirit of how I view, like-. - Yes. - If in a marriage, like, you just need to agree on it. - Yeah. - Yeah. - But they have completely different agreements on it. Do I think her logic is sound? No. I disagree with that. I've never viewed it that way. - Wait, also, like, her parents gave only her money, like, the parents-. - But they didn't. They put the couple's name- - No, they gave it,
they gave it to both of them. It was addressed to both of them. She's just now after the fact being like, "No, this is my money.". - That's so weird. - It feels pretty explicit, like if a gift is for someone in particular, you write their name on it, or you write two names if it's for two people. - And I'm like, "Oh, are you taking the whole thing. because I'm your family? Then I'll split it down the middle. and give the other half to Joe the Shmo.". - No, this is one of those stories. where I'm like, I feel like. I would be curious about more details about this person. because she sounds selfish as hell. - [Angela] Yeah. - I'm sure there are more aspects to this.
We don't have an update, but it feels like one of those. where it's like, okay, update, yeah, she's fully awful and she-. - And we're not getting married. - Update she's been stealing from me for five years. - Update, she shot me with a gun once. - Update from the hospital, I'm in the ICU. - Oh, yeah, so she tried to kill me again. Verdict is not the asshole. Comments, "Time to cancel the engagement.". Someone said, "Not the asshole, but please don't get married. or even plan your wedding yet. You need to resolve your financial differences.". - Yes. - "In fact, I'd actually consider breaking off. the engagement altogether. Any money my husband or I get, his bonus from work,
a check made out to us, to one of us, whatever, is all ours. For us, there is no his versus hers.". Someone said, "Not the asshole, but you were indeed given a gift that night, the gift of seeing your fiance's true character. before you are legally bound to her. She is selfish and greedy. Save yourself and do not walk down the aisle. unless you want a lifetime of this.". Someone replied to that saying, "Not the asshole. So many idiots in here saying to run for the hills. They don't know shit about you. other than this small snapshot. Listen, it is a red flag, but look back and see if there are any others.
you can identify before now. You at the very least need to have. a serious sit-down conversation. with this woman before tying the knot. Good luck.". That is true. - Yeah. - We have this one snapshot. We, you know, only he, OP, can really make the call if he feels this is good or not. But I think it is the biggest red flag. that you're engaged. and you have a massive disagreement on finances. - Massive. - That is a lot. I think it makes me question.
whether they've communicated. about every other category. - Yeah, this is a really-. - I have a question for you guys. - Yeah. - Because this person. commented on it where, let's say you're in a marriage partnership. and one person gets a bonus from work. Do you pocket that yourself. or do you put it in the joint family fund? - Depends on your whole thing. - Once again, that's an agreement thing. Like that's, I think if they like talk.
to a counselor, a couple's therapist, or they like, I don't know, or just talked it out just the two of them, they could come up with what they're both comfortable with. I do think they need to be very communicative. like of what the numbers are. I do think to a degree, it's like it is all like you're married, it is all technically both of your money, but who is technically in charge of what pockets? That could be different. I think it could be different, completely unique to each couple,
but it needs to be fully agreed upon. - Yeah, exactly. The only black and white answer to that. is that you can't assume. - Yeah. - Totally. - Yeah. - Totally. - And that you should. just be communicating. - Absolutely. - But besides that, it depends, I feel. - Yeah. 'Cause we've talked about this before about financial, like basically financial infidelity, right? Of like, it's like, oh, if you're in a marriage, if you heard about a couple, and it's like, oh, this one couple won a lottery, and they won $100,000. and they didn't tell their partner about it.
It's like, is that like a form of cheating? And I'd be like, yeah, that's a massive secret. That's (beep) up. - Yeah. - That's a rift in trust. - Totally. - We had this story not too long ago. where a guy quit his job to start Twitch streaming, didn't tell his wife that he quit his job, was pretending. And I'm like, that to me is like, that's financial infidelity where it's like-. - If you have a baby together-. - Massive changes to your finances, it is ultimately joint finances. It affects one another,
so I think it's huge. - I totally agree. - So, I agree with the last comment. that it's like, you can't just hear a Reddit comment. and go, "Okay, well, I'm gonna cut off this engagement.". But I do think it requires further-. - Needs to be talked about. - It's a massive red flag. - I also think that having the difficult conversations. before the marriage sort of like preps you. for all the other difficult conversations. - Oh my God, yeah. - Yeah. Especially sometimes it's not even about the subject. It's about can we have a difficult conversation? - Yes, yes, and how do we navigate a difficult conversation?
- Yeah. - Like going up to OP. and being like, or OP going up to the person. and being like, "So what do you expect. when we get wedding gifts? Just curious.". And then just seeing, and just seeing what that dialogue is. - I think that, yeah, what's also a red flag. to me is her response where it's like, I think in a partnership, if you're not trying to understand your partner. and wanting to like find that middle ground. and instead just win. - Yeah. - I'm like, that bodes so bad. - Totally. Agree.
- Our next story comes from the SubReddit Relationships, and this was posted back in 2014. - Uh-oh. Uh-oh. - Vintage. They write, "Both me, a 33-year-old woman, and my fiance, a 33-year-old man, of five years have almost identical last names, but he is insisting. that I change my last name after marriage. This argument is making me consider canceling the wedding. My fiance and I have been together for five years, engaged for six months. We recently started designing our save the dates. and had a huge argument over me not changing my last name.
We both have extremely generic last names. A good example of what I'm talking about. is Shultz versus Schultz.". Shultz, S-H-U-L-T-Z. versus Schultz, S-C-H-U-L-T-Z. So they might just be like one letter off. in their last names. - Okay, okay. - "It is the difference of a single silent letter. I explained to my fiance that I do not want. to change my last name because I am a journalist. and all of my work is tied to my current name. If I were to change my name,
it would mess up my future career opportunities, plus my name is the traditional spelling. while my fiance's is the Americanized spelling. My fiance has told me that he could not fathom. having a wife with a different last name. But his only explanation was that it bothered him. He said that it wasn't about tradition, but it just felt wrong to him.". - It's not about tradition, it's about my ego. I mean, it feels wrong to me. (producers laughing). - "I already offered that our children. would have his last name, but we're at an impasse. It just feels like he doesn't care. about how this will impact my career.
or even that we already share the same last name. The argument was such a huge blowup. that I don't want to get married. if it means having to give in. to what feels like an unreasonable demand. On top of everything, changing my name. would be a huge pain in the butt.". - [Angela] Yes. - "As I would have to probably do everything. over and over again because companies are assuming. my last name is misspelled.". - Yes. - "Instead of seeing it as my new married name.". - Yes. - Oh, man. So right off the bat, what is the massive, I mean, a million-. - Silent letter. - Silent letter. - That's where I started having a strong opinion.
- Yeah. That's where it began. No, I wouldn't care if their names. were massively different. - When you said Shultz and Schole-. - Yeah. - Yeah. - I'd be like, "Oh, that's different.". Shultz and Schultz. - Shultz and Schultz. - [Shayne] I frankly don't-. - Shultz and Schultz. - I don't know, maybe, I know that-. (producers laughing). Shultz and Schultz. - Call Shultz and Schultz today. - Have you been injured? I wouldn't give a shit if the names were super different. Like I don't like that he's, they're talking and she's going, "I'm uncomfortable changing my name.".
And he goes, "Well, I'm uncomfortable. with you not changing your name.". And he's completely putting his emotion, like he's like, "Well, I feel uncomfortable, and that should take precedence. over you feeling discomfort.". - And that should trump your discomfort. - And your discomfort plus all the hassle. you're gonna have to go through changing your name. - I didn't think about this. because I've never been married, but like it's crazy that the woman has to do. all the like document work, the DMV shit, the like check shit, all of that, and that the guy just is like, yeah, it's my name now, like.
(producers laughing). - No, it's a ton of shit. - Like, unless your last name is Obama, I am not changing my last name. (Shayne laughing) (producers laughing). - Olivia Obama. Are you injured? - [Shayne] Specifically Olivia Obama. - This is wild for a lot of reasons, like you said, Shayne, the biggest, biggest red flag is someone thinking. that one person's discomfort trumps the other. - [Olivia] Yes. - He's saying it just felt wrong to him. There's no- - No reason. - He has no reason on paper.
He's not, it's not a tradition even. It just like, it just feels wrong. I'm like- - That's not good enough. - It feels like you just want to control her. - Yes. - Yeah. - And it's all on her to then have to decide. what she wants to do. Why is it always being put onto her? How about you learn. how you are making her feel uncomfortable. and she has to make this big freaking decision? And she's sort of a visible name. where she's a journalist. - She's a journalist. - Yeah. Yeah, there's a brand attached to it. - Like, if Olivia was Olivia Obama,
you wouldn't know that's Olivia Obama from Smosh. - I wouldn't. You wouldn't. - It would ruin all of your body of work. - I wouldn't be getting any brand deals, you know. - They go, "Who's that? That's a bot.". - Exactly. Well, it could also be Olivia Sui Obama. - Olivia Sui Obama. - Sui-Obama. - I feel like this falls into the category too. of like what I've said a million times. of just like disrespect is so, it's tough. - Well, in his mind, he's like, "She's disrespecting me.".
Do you know what I, like- - Yeah, but it's her boundary. Like this is her last name. And he's like, if you don't change a huge aspect. of your identity, that's, you're making me. I'm like, that to me is one of those red flags. where I'm like, if that bleeds over. into other categories, this is not good. - Yeah, so it's not a sustainable relationship. - [Shayne] Yeah. - And you got to give it up to life. for giving you these little things, right? - [Shayne] Totally. - That are just so small. but massive, like, hey. - Right.
- You know what I mean, like-. - You have the feeling and then it's like, oh, shit, now it comes to the forefront. - I was in a relationship where my partner. wanted my last name and was like, "I think your last name is really cool. and I want your last name instead.". - [Producer] Aw! - That's sweet. - Great. - That is really sweet. - Obama's-. - Obama, yeah, Obama's a sweet guy. - [Shayne] Obama's pretty great. - What can I say? (producers laughing). Barack Sui. - Barack Sui. - And Olivia Obama. - You know, thinking of the comment from earlier, like, I do think, like, I don't know this person.
This isn't... Do I have enough here to say, like, don't get married? But what is telling me a lot. is that she is already feeling like. I want to call off the engagement. I'm like, if you're about to get married. and you are saying, "I'm feeling like I want to call this off.". I'm like, that might be a better reason. than anything on paper. It also tells me that I'm like, this is one example that you're giving us, but is this telling, is there more to this? - Other things. - That's what I'm saying. It's like a little life being like, a little like thing.
- [Shayne] Totally. - Yeah, it's a little foreshadowing. Whoa, life's a moving. - Or maybe not just foreshadowing, maybe it's like, this is the one that she really clocked. and can put on paper, but maybe it's been happening a lot. but she's not registering it. - Yes. Yes. - Yes. - Comments, "If he insists that it isn't tradition. but just that it feels wrong to have different names, he could take yours, right? Especially if he isn't in a career. that depends on older work. Did you two discuss that option?". OP responds, "It was something that I brought up.
and he is adamantly opposed, and ironically, it is for the same reasons. He does not want the work he's published. to not be tied to him if he changed his last name.". - It's a silent letter. (producers laughing). - Someone said, "That kind of tells you. all you need to know. about his reasonableness, doesn't it? What else is he going to refuse. to compromise on in the marriage?". - Yeah. - OP said, "Out of the five years we've been together, this is the only thing. we have ever not been able to work past. He is reasonable on everything except this, and he said that he feels horrible about it,
but he doesn't think he could marry someone. without her taking his last name.". - Okay, can I say something about that? I think in different cultures, sometimes this means a lot to people. - [Shayne] Sure. - Like I had a family member get married. and it was similar like this. where it was like this person had no red flags, but that thing, that last name part. meant a lot to him and his family. - Sure. - So I do want to give space for that, but it's still what's the red flag part. is not wanting to have an open dialogue and talk about it,
because that's what this family member did. It was like, he was like, "I'm very, this is a cultural thing for us.". - Totally. - "And I want to pass my father's name down. and I'm the only son,". and then they talked about it. - Right. Couple details. They've agreed that their children. will have his last name. He's also being forthright and saying, "It's not tradition. I just don't feel," so like. - Okay. - He's not, if he was like, "Oh, this is a big cultural thing. My family's putting all this pressure on me.". - [Angela] Oh, it's not. It's fine. - He said, "It's not tradition.
It's just it doesn't feel right.". - Yeah. - And then they've agreed that their children. will have his last name, so he will be passing on his last name. - So then it's just his ownership of her. - It's just literally like, I want you to have the last name. - Yeah. - Well, look at that. (producers laughing). - And she's already agreed on so many things. Last comment, "I see your point, but at one point you call your last name generic. Do you really want to take the argument to the heights. it's going over something you find generic? And if you're in a fight that is blown up.
to these proportions to where you think. you may not even marry the guy if he doesn't concede, then you don't need to get married. When something really big comes up, will that be your solution/train of thought also?". OP says, "It is generic, but my last name is the traditional spelling. If asked to spell either one of our names. after hearing it, 99 out of 100 people. would spell it the way my last name is spelled, not the way his is spelled. Imagine Michaels with a M-I-C-H-A-E-L-S. versus Michal, M-I-C-H-A-L-S.".
- Oh. - "Or Green. spelled G-R-E-E-N versus Grene, G-R-E-N-E. This is the only major disagreement we have ever had. Things got a bit heated, but it was never to the point of yelling. We each just set our side, couldn't agree, and then went to bed.". (sighs) I mean-. - Go with your gut. - If he's saying, "I can't marry you if you don't do this,". it's just like, I don't know what to say. You guys are both kind of saying the thing then. - Then maybe don't get married. because you guys both can't make-. - If you can't get past that- - Compromise.
- That's-. - And now in a post paper world, go with me on this, all you got to do is change your, if it's really about your comfort, if I changed my last name to what you want, to your last name in your phone, but then government-wise-. - Yeah. - Like my journalism work, like, is this just how you feel? - I know, that's what's weird about it. It's like you can-. - When are they going to see your name written out? - Also to be clear, she's saying. that their names are said aloud the same way. - [Olivia] Yeah. Yeah. - That's what I'm saying is like,
when are you going to see, besides like Instagram and your phone, when are you going to see your name written out. where you go, "I don't feel like you belong with me.". - Yeah. - Or to me. There you go. - This feels very symbolic. to him in a way that I'm having trouble with it. But luckily for us, we have an update. - Yes! Yes! (producers clapping). Thank God. (producers laughing). Do you think they're together? - So it's two days later. - I am gonna believe that they're together. - I'm going to believe that our coffee's close.
and that they're together. - Okay. All right. - And that he was like-. - "You're right, baby." - "You're right. You're right, baby. Let me go wash your car.". - Yeah. (producers laughing). - "I first posted on Wednesday. while waiting to leave work. It gave me a lot to think about, so I decided to drop the conversation. until after Christmas to think about everything. and also to not cause more unneeded stress at the holidays. A lot of people suggested. that I take my husband's last name. and keep my maiden name for professional use,
and I have one thing to say to you all. I have had my name for 33 years so far. and suggesting that I do the one thing I don't want to do, which is change my name in any form, is just really shortsighted. With the difference of one letter, no one would assume my name. is different because I'm married. They would assume it's a typo since a letter was deleted, which is far more of a nightmare than changing my name. to something completely different. Moving on now. As I said in one of my comments, I had already spoken to my fiance's parents. about it before I posted. They had heard our argument. We live in the same house. No, it's not weird because the house is huge.
And my fiance's dad had agreed with me. His wife, my fiance's mom, had kept her maiden name. and it wasn't an issue at all.". So we know for sure there's no culture, no, this is fully that his mom kept her maiden name. - For sure. - "My father-in-law had a talk. with my fiance on Christmas before I had woken up. I don't know what all the details were, but the short of it was that their family name. had been Schultz for hundreds of years. before it was changed to Shultz with minus a letter,
and that my fiance was technically going against. centuries of family history. by insisting that I change my name, and that he would actually be honoring the family. by bringing back the traditional name.". So taking her name would actually be the-. - Nice. - More. - I love this update so far. - "After I woke up, my fiance asked. if I would talk with him. I agreed and he and I had a long discussion. about the whole thing, the talk with his dad. about why it bothered him, et cetera. My fiance told me that he loved me regardless of everything. and that it just hadn't occurred to him.
that he was demanding. that I change a fundamental part of me. He also added that my stubbornness about the issue. is part of why he likes me.". - Oh! - "Because I'm not the type of woman to roll over. In the end, my fiance and I agreed. that he would keep his name, I would keep my name, and our children will be named Schultz, but that they can choose. whatever they like once they turn 18.". - Great. - "Happy ending," she writes. - I'm happy. - Happy ending, smiley face. - I'm happy. We never get an update that feels kind of good.
- Yeah. - But he had to be like, "I love that you're so (beep) stubborn.". Yeah. (producers laughing). Who's the stubborn one, silent Shultz? (Shayne laughing) (producers laughing). - As if he wasn't stubborn too. It's like, you guys came at an impasse. and you're saying what-. - Yeah, I love that you wouldn't just listen to me. and shut up, but that's something I love about you. - It does, I do hate the internal feeling. after reading so many Reddit stories, my internal voice is like, I don't believe it, like, it's so fake. I'm like, no, things can be good sometimes.
- I know, and it's also, it's like a man had to be like, "Hey, it's actually fine.". - Yeah, I know, dad, I know. - Yeah, I talked to my dad and now it's good. - It's okay, whatever. - I don't love, I don't love that it took other people convincing him. - Yeah, for him to respect her. - I don't, yeah, I don't like it. - Yeah. - Personally. - Can we just like, and can we just agree that men are just so exhausting? Like none of-. (Shayne laughing) (producers laughing). Like none of this should-. - Can we agree that men-. - Can you agree on that? It's like- - Now we're waking up.
before Christmas and we're having these talks. (Olivia sighing) (producers laughing). No, this was- - Like-. - I think I would've felt better if he took her name, and I know he has his right to keep his name, but after the dad was like, "No, actually, you'll be fulfilling the family legacy. by taking her name." - Yeah. Because a lot - - He's like, "Whoa, slow down. I'm not going to go that far.". - He goes, "I'll, I'll, I'll respect her, Dad, but I won't change my name.". - Okay, I'm going to respect her boundaries, but let's not, let's not go into that business. - Let's not sacrifice. (Shayne laughing) (producers laughing). Let's not do what you're about to do for marriage.
- Yeah. - Make sacrifices together. Yeah, I'm happy. I'm not elated, but I'm happy. - Yeah, I'm, you know. - It was 12 years ago and we have no more updates, but it's just like, I wonder what the situation is now. - I know it's, yeah. - Maybe we should look up her name as a journalist. - Well, we don't, we don't know who she is. - Oh. - We don't have a name. - But do we know the, but do we know the influencer? - Yeah. - We got to find them. (producers laughing). - That's fun. - I'll find you. - There's a lot of people that are on big group texts.
and GroupMe's with people of their same name. - Oh! - Like a bunch of, like-. - Wow. - I was talking to somebody. - I've never met another Shayne Topp with my spelling. - Well, no, just Shayne. - Oh, Shayne. - Like, if you're on a GroupMe. with a bunch of Shaynes. - But Shayne spelled my way is pretty rare. - Oh, really? - Yeah, with the Y. - Oh, that's what I also. was gonna say. - Shon-ye. - It is so common- - Shaney. - Like so many people who came into Ellis Island, it was all just like word of-. - Just kind of like, all right. - Like, I guess I was told that we're thinking. that it was actually Giarratano. - Oh. - And not Giarratana.
- What happened? - And it was like. a mishearing thing. - I think my Opa, my grandpa said at one point. that Topp back in like Germany, back in the (beep) whatever. (beep) barbarian times, it was like Tupa or something. - Whoa! - Yeah. - Wait, I love Shayne Tupa. - Shayne Tupa. - He's had two martinis, he's now Shayne Tupa. (producers laughing). - My name goes back a while. Like no, but when they were describing like, oh yeah, your great, great, great whatever grandfather. who moved out to America and went to Montana, Johann Topp.
I was like, that's (beep) hilarious. - Johann Tupa. - Johann Topp. (Angela laughing). They show up and they're like Tupa. and they're like, no, (beep) Topp, dude, all right. (Angela laughing) (Olivia laughing). - Tupa? I'm writing Topp. - Yeah. I'm not 100% on that, but I thought I remember him saying that. All right. Our last story comes from Am I Overreacting? It was posted this month in 2026. - I love when they're fresh. - I know. "Am I overreacting from my annoyed response. to my friend asking to bring her boyfriend.
to our girls' trip?". - Oh my God. - "So we planned the trip a few weeks back. We're all between the ages of 19 to 20, and we wanted to book a place. to stay from Sunday to Tuesday. I found the place, so I booked it under my name. Me and another one of my friends paid for the deposit, but other than that, we all split the price. The room situation for the six of us. was three bedrooms and a pullout couch. Anyways, we got on a call. and she told me her boyfriend is not coming, but she's mad at me for blowing up at her. for a mild request. I don't want to tell my friends.
because I don't want any more tension on the trip, so I've come here to just post this.". And we have a text exchange. between OP and this friend. - I'd love for me to see it. - It's a group chat exchange-. - Okay. - That OP is part of. "Hey, just wanted to confirm. everything is all good for tomorrow.". This friend writes, "Hey babes,". kissy heart emoji. "Everything is good, but I just wanted to add. that blank is coming.". We'll call him Todd. "I just want to add that Todd is coming.". - Can we call him Schultz? - Todd Schultz.
(producers laughing). "Everything is good, but I just wanted to add that Todd is coming. I understand it's all last minute, but yeah, it would be better for me. to inform you in advance.". (Angela laughing) (producers laughing). OP writes, "I'm really confused right now. Is he coming for the whole day. or is he gonna sleep here?". Writes, "You removed a message.". "I sent a voice note, but you can't hear anything. Could we just go on a call right now?". She writes, "Sorry, I can't call right now. But yeah, Todd is gonna be staying the night. I feel bad because you're going to have to chase up booking, but I'm more than happy to just do it myself.".
- Oh my God. - OP writes, "You can't really do that. The booking is in my name and they have my number. I don't know how long it's going to take. or if they're going to add an additional charge. I'll call when I get home later, however, whether they'll let him come isn't guaranteed, plus the others might not be comfortable. since it was meant to be a girls' trip.". - Yeah. - She writes, "OMGGG, that sounds like so much work. I feel awful. I'm sure the other girls will be fine. It's basically a couple trip anyway.". OP writes, "How?" with four question marks.
"You're going to be the only couple.". She goes, "Yeah, but blank and blank are exes.". OP writes, "They met on a blind date, but they never actually dated, so they were never a couple.". She writes, "They'll all be fine with it, trust me.". Girl, two crying emojis, "You need to meet your friends. I'll look into the booking, but before that, you need to ask them if they're fine with it.". She writes a bunch of gibberish. "It's gonna be awkward. You do it, please, my beautiful princess,".
two kissing emojis, "Sweet and kind with a heart of gold.". OP writes, "Flattery isn't going to work. I don't understand this. One of them might agree. because she hates to say no to this, and the others also have problems saying no, but blank is gonna be pissed.". She writes, "Why do you care so much. what that person thinks?". What one of our friends thinks. She writes, "'Cause it's her birthday," in all caps. (producers laughing). - You were kidding, they bad. - "You can be away from your boyfriend for two days.".
She writes, "If you have a problem, just (beep) say it. You can't agree to do something, but then in the same breath, come up with all the reasons you shouldn't do it.". - Oh my God. - "Are you in love with Todd or something?". Or it's not, it's probably the friend. "Are you in love with that friend or something? Why are we doing so much for her birthday? It's a trip for all of us. Just because it coincides with her birthday. doesn't mean the trip is for her.". - Babe, babe. - OP says, "Am I in love with you.
because I'm also doing you a favor? And by that logic, everyone would be in love. with each other. I just wanted you to confirm things. before I go out of my way to call up for no reason. You don't have to be such a little shit. about not being with Joe for two days.". Okay, so we get to know his name. - Okay, so it's not, it's not Todd. It's not Todd. It's Joe. - It's not Todd. It's Joe. - Now that we know his name is Joe. - So we figured out it's Joe. - And I'll say, of course his name is Joe. - I love that at a certain point, she got so fed up, she stopped erasing the name. She's like, (beep) you. "You see each other twice a week. It won't be all that different from usual.".
She says, "Nice to know how you feel about things.". OP says, "Things? Thing singular. There's one issue right now.". She writes, "You not being supportive. of my relationship is the other thing.". (Shayne laughs). OP says, "I am supportive of your relationship. I just don't think it's a good idea to change our plans.". She goes, "God, you're so OCD.". - What? (Angela laughing). Do you know the definition of that? - OP says, "Okay, take cheap blows right now. Call me when you're not busy. and before it's too late, so I know whether I need to make a call or not.".
She writes, "I will, even though I'm not sure. if I even want to go.". - Oh my God. - Oh! - OP says, "That's your prerogative, but tell me in advance. because I need to rearrange things.". Oh my God, this person sucks so bad. - This is so, okay, wait, can we talk about, are you ever on a group text. when there's a fight going on and you're like, "Whoa. Whoa.". - Whoa. - Oh, holy shit. - Oh, shit. Oh, shit. - Holy shit. And you're at work and you're like, "Oh my God, they're fighting.". And you're just looking to watch it. - Or you're in the middle of like a convo. that you can't like look at your phone,
like it's not like, and you feel your phone start to buzz. - And you're like-. - And you're just like, either my family. or my group of friends is going through some shit right now. - Truly, truly, I am always, I want to say 98% of the time, I'm the other girl in the thread going, "Hey, catching up.". - Yeah. - Like hours later because it's always me. - If I'm out and I start to feel my phone buzz a ton, it's either one of my group of friends. has some crazy going on, or my mom posted, "Look at this sunset,". and it's all my sister-in-laws. and brothers going, "Yeah, it looks great, mom.".
- All with Androids like-. - Yeah, great. - Blah-blah-blah liked this. Blah-blah-blah liked this. Blah-blah-blah liked this. Blah-blah-blah liked this. - It's like, yeah, yeah, it's pretty cool. You know what, this person did a lot that I hate. - Yeah. - Right? - Oh, yes. - The OCD was the cherry on top of like, oh, you're just a super asshole. - Yeah. - But I hate the original thing. at the beginning of... Sorry. - The original text? - When she's like "It's gonna be awkward,
but if you do it, please, my beautiful princess, sweet and kind, my heart of gold.". I'm like (beep) you. You've clearly been so manipulative. - Yep. - Yeah. - And you get away with this shit so often, I'm like, oh, I hate that the most. - I hate that. - Like, you know. what you're asking is unfair. - Yes. - And you're trying to code it with all this shit. - Yes. - Yes. - Like, don't do that. - Also, just saying he's coming, like-. - He's coming. This is happening and you have to deal with this. - You have no choice and you have to deal with this, and you have to call, but I can, maybe. It's inconvenient for you, but like, I could try.
Like, no. Just don't even ask. - There's so much wrong here, and it's hard to like pick the best one to start. Like I'm like overwhelmed. - It's just like she knows it's unfair and wrong, and she's doing it anyways and it's so inconvenient. Like the fact that you know it's inconvenient. and you're still going to do it. just makes you a very selfish person. - That's also, they're 19 or 20, so they're young in their plus one life. - [Shayne] Oh, yeah. - But plus one rules are so interesting. where it's like, oh, if everyone's bringing a plus one,
you don't really need to ask, but then if nobody is, you should kind of ask. Like it's like a very weird thin line. - 19/20, this is pre like when you as a friend group go, "Oh, we need to stop talking to this one person.". - Oh yeah. - Like really, it like kind of hits in your like early mid-20s. I think is where I've seen, at least when I was in my 20s, that's when it's like, oh, we're cutting this person off. - Or- - Yeah. - Or if we can't talk sense to them. and they can't understand other people-. - Or, yeah, I think it's also like, oh, you're young,
you haven't been on a lot of group trips. - Yeah. - This is, and Airbnb blowing up post-pandemic, it's all started where it's like that is a thing. that people do when they are in a friend group. And there are etiquettes and there are things. And inviting someone without full cast buy-in, I'm like, you need the whole group to be like, we're all sharing (beep) bathrooms and a kitchen. You all need to agree on who's coming. - I can also see this zoomed out 10 years later.
when these people are married, kids, whatever, and they go, "Hey, remember when you did that?". Like that was a- - 100%. - And that was so lame of you, but look at how much you've grown. and like that was so lame. - 100%. - But we love you. - Sure. - I can see that too. - I bring up like cutting people off. I also at this stage in my 30s, I am friends with so many people. where we went through phases. where it was like, "Oh, you were being an absolute asshole,". and they're like, "I was being a total asshole then.". - Yes, totally. - And I grew up and I learned. I took those things in a way that I'm like,
"Oh, how can I change from this?". - There are also invisible rules to the girls' trip. - That is true. - The girls' trip-. - If I'm Joe, I don't want to go on the girls' trip. - Yeah! - First of all, poor (beep) Joe. But then second of all, like I don't know, a bunch of girls going on a trip, there are, I don't know what it is, but it's like the second you bring a plus one, it's not a girls' trip anymore. - No. - And I don't mean it in gender ways. I mean it like, like this is a dog only beach. and you bring owners. - Yeah. I get it. - But you know what I mean? It's like it changes the dynamic significantly.
It's not about gender-. - Totally. - But you bring. your plus ones, it's so different. - 100%. - I remember even when me and Ang got drinks. for the first time and I brought Sam, and I was like, the dynamic changed. - Oh my God, I do remember that. - And I was like, I can't be fully me and Ange, you know, because there's a third person. - I fully respect it. - I remember that. - I fully respect that. - And I'm sorry. - No, we had a blast. But it is like, you just have to acknowledge. And I remember you were like, "Is it cool if he comes?". Because we had already had like a round or something.
- Yeah. - It's like, you just have to acknowledge like, "Hey, I'm going to change the dynamic. of what we're about to do.". - Totally. - Because Joe's about to come. - And I don't, maybe at 19/20, she just doesn't understand like socially. - [Angela] Yeah. - I think that's something like. people in their mid, late 20s, I think people start to understand that more. - That's what I'm saying is like they're gonna learn. - Oh, it's not even an insult. - Yeah, they'll learn. - It's just like. dynamics are different. - Yeah. - But then-. - And sometimes it's just even a numbers game too. Like, you know, when you're hanging out, it's like three people, four people, five people, it changes entirely. - But it's also so uncomfortable. when there's a male person in a-. - I fully agree.
- A girls' trip Airbnb. Like, you can't just run around naked. - This, I will say this, this literally happened to my friends. who are actually in their 30s recently, where they all, it was like a girls' trip, and one was hellbent being like, "I'm bringing my boyfriend. I'm bringing my boyfriend.". And it made the others mad, and then it made my friend mad being like, "Why can't I bring my boyfriend? You don't get to decide.". And what was interesting was it was less about. this person bringing their boyfriend,
and it was more that all of the friends in that group. were like, "It's because we never hang out. with you without him.". Some relationships are like that, and that is also another red flag, where it's like, "I can't go without Joe.". And it's like- - It's like, okay, who are you? - So no, you can. You actually can. - Yeah, who are you individually? - Yeah. - Yeah, it's actually funny. because like I'm thinking like. if I'm in the place of Joe, there's been times where Courtney's like going out. and she'll be like, "Oh yeah.". And it might even people here at work. - [Angela] Yeah, yeah, yeah. - She'll be like, "Oh, I think it's like. gonna be mostly a girls. I think it's a girls' night.".
- Yeah, yeah. - I'm like, "Oh, sick.". And then later on, like after a couple hours. she'll be like, "Oh, actually I think it might not be, so if you want to come,". and I'm already like mid-planning, like I'm like, "Oh, I'd already planned on the movie. I was gonna watch by myself that night.". I'm like, I'm like cracking a beer. I'm like, "Oh, really? Oh!". (producers laughing). - You got- - I don't know. if I can though. (laughs). "Are you sure it's not just girls? I feel like it's probably. You should do the girls' thing.". - You got "Charlotte's Web" open, beer open. - "Charlotte's Web.".
Me getting plastered reading "Charlotte's Web". for the 10th time. - Under a barbell. - What's that (beep) spider writing now? - A barbell. - "Wait, babe, I'm actually pretty deep in it.". (Olivia laughing) (producers laughing). - (laughs) I'm pigging out right now. - I'm having a guys' night. - Guys' night. - Joe is reading. "Charlotte's Web.". - Just me and the barn. (Angela laughing). All right. Verdict, verdict is not overreacting. - Yeah. We didn't even touch the texts.
The texts were crazy. - Oh, awful. Awful shit. - That's not how. you talk to your friends. Anyway, keep going. - No. Verdict not overreacting. Comments, "Not overreacting. This is not a friend. She has unilaterally tried to change the plans, and when you expressed consideration for others, she immediately attacked you and your other friends. You didn't blow up at her, she blew up at you. and has proven herself to be unreliable and immature. If I were you, I would think carefully about. whether I want to stay friends with someone like this.". Someone said, "Not the asshole. Who plans a girls' trip and brings a boy?".
OP said, "For real, why would a man be there?". Lastly, someone said, "Why on earth. as a boyfriend would you want to go on a girls' trip? Also, your friend is being really uncompromising. by just telling you her boyfriend is coming. Not overreacting.". OP said, "I have no clue about whether. or not he knew it was a girls' trip, or if she omitted that detail to him. He's the type of guy who's down. for any type of hangout, even when he isn't invited, so there is a possibility that he was aware of the fact.". Whatever. I mean, Joe is not a part like is at fault.
I'm also, there's so many things. This girl was an avalanche of problems. - Yes. - Yeah. - Because you also added the fact that. she then expected OP to communicate this to the friends. - Yes. - Yeah. - She's like, "Can you do it?". - Yeah. - "Yeah, can you do it? Oh my God, that sounds like so much work. Anyways, thank you.". - Anyway, Joe! - Joe! He's just like-. - And then you're like, "You have OCD or something.". - Yeah. - Oh, that was- - Just come on. - You know what? Joe, stay home. - Yeah.
Oh, boy. - We did it, Joe. - We did it, Joe. You're now on the girls' trip. - [Shayne] We did it, Joe. - You're coming to the trip. - He's just like, "Oh yeah, it's pretty good to be here.". (everyone laughing). - "Yeah, let's get some ice cream.". (everyone laughing). He goes, "My friend, Olivia Obama's gonna be there.". - I said to Obama, I said, I said, I said, "What are we doing?". (producers laughing). - That was good. (Shayne laughing). That was really good. - That was actually.
a good Biden. - That was good. - All right. That's it. No more stories. - Should I check? Huh? - Whoa. (Olivia groans). - Yes! - A lovely- - Oh my God. It's here. - Yay! I accidentally think I put-. - [Olivia] Alexina! - Our crew member who we love, Alexina. - Alexina. - She's here at 5:00 AM. (producers laughing). - Oh my God. - Matcha Americano. - Oh my God. - Whoa. - Look at that. - Matcha Americano. - Drip coffee, hot. - It's got the straw attached. - Drip coffee, hot. - Espresso. - Look at this. - [Olivia] Wait, why is there espresso too?
- [Angela] I forgot to take out-. - They haven't even cut the umbilical cord. - Oh my God! (laughs). (everyone laughing). And I forgot, Shayne, to take out your espresso shot. - Wait, oh, oh shit, I get the espresso shot too. - So that's for you at home. - [Shayne] Who wants the espresso shot? - It's you. - That's for you guys. Get your maple syrup out. - Get your cupcake syrup. Megan. - Get your entitlement out. - Hey, that's for you, Megan, since you want a free coffee so bad. Take it!
- I will. - Take it. - Never unsee this being an umbilical. (producers laughing). Hey, cheers guys. It's Saturday morning. Get your coffee out. - Oh, no sweetener in this? Entitled. Just kidding. Just kidding. - Whoa, it tastes like pancakes! - Really? - Does it? I'm okay, thanks. - Okay. - Thank you both so much for being here. - Thank you, Shayne. - Thank you, Ang. - Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. - And thank you for watching, and hey, we'll see you next Saturday. Bye. - Bye.
