Kris Paronto - Inside the 13-Hour Benghazi Gunfight and the Hillary-Obama Cover-Up | SRS #153

[Music]. Chris Ponto welcome to the show man long. time coming I we proba already said it. but thanks for and and you're so. tolerant man that was so cool that you. were willing to wait and then just hey. I'm going to be in town and I hope you. didn't have to bump anybody if you did. sorry guys but just you you've always. been a standup guy with me there I. appreciate that it's really cool you. thanks bud oh my pleasure I'm just happy. you're here and I uh extremely patient.

so there aren't many standup guys in in. there in the world and even coming out. of our community anymore in this public. figure world so it's nice to still find. a few out there like yourself I try to. be but I'm not always a stand up guy. that's why oh I'm sure you are talk to. my wife man I need to bring you home. talk to my wife about how nice and. reasonable I am cuz I don't get that. respect at home man well.

I want to do a life story on you yeah. you know and um obviously talk a lot. about Benghazi and what you're doing now. but we're going to cover the full. spectrum here and um so everybody starts. off with an. introduction are you going to read don't. make me feel like a pretentious [ __ ]. Oh no you're good everybody gets one. Chris Ponto former Army Ranger second. Battalion 75th regiment your spond to.

the Benghazi 2012 attack you're the. author of the Ranger way and the. Patriots Creed co-author of 13 hours the. inside account of what really happened. in Benghazi your motivational and public. speaker and the co-host on Battle line. podcast yeah you're the founder of the. 14th hour F Foundation owner of battal. line tactical and co-owner of Tanto. vodka yeah you're the host of a. pro-military. documentary series war heroes you.

co-founded E3 Firearms Association and. you're the father you're a father. husband and a Christian that's the most. important there at the bottom you could. have cut out everything else and just. read that at the bottom and I would have. been perfectly happy but that right. there just tells everybody what a great. man you are I appre thank you and thanks. man thanks this was cool you to say app. you're welcome what is the E3 Firearms.

Association you know and we it's it's so. difficult I don't know if you know Adam. paint shot Adam was a Sig fire instru he. started Sig Academy okay Trooper in New. Hampshire um it is a training website uh. it has been so difficult though to get. that thing off the ground it was just. run into roadblock after. roadblock uh because of Google CU hey. and if you don't think there's state run. media and state run um state run. Internet web there is if you have to be.

dumb in a bag of hammers to not see that. out there but it it's it's we've tried. to get it going there's a lot of. training materials on their videos out. there um and uh you know you get. sponsorships to come to battle line. tackle courses if you're a member you. come to my courses for free oh wow I. mean it's just it's so is it an online. trainingat it's an online training. platform but it's a paid online training. how many how many lessons are on there. oh man I know just hit pocket training. stuff before I'll just jump on and do a.

10-minute video we've got to have 50 or. 60 videos on oh right on and Adam's a. wonderful wonderful instructor he is I. am the Lucy goosey hey man let's just go. out and shoot I'm going to give you some. lessons Adam is which is which is great. it's a great dynamic because he you you. do there are people that respond to that. kind of training better the by the book. lesson by where some guys respond to. just tell me what I need to do this is. what you need to do but you know it's.

it's been we we've had it going for a. few years now and it's just always imp. trying to improve the website get that. flowing um it's E3 do and it's a whole. association so it's not just Firearms. there's camping it's outdoor oh wow. camping Aviation John rain Waters runs. the aviation side of it um you know. rving off-roading and I say I so I tell. the E3 owner his name's uh Brian Brian. Brian Johnson um I tell him yeah Farms. is like the redhead stepchild of e3 E3.

cuz all those are cruising and ours is. just it's it's been very difficult and. and I get it too cuz you know it's a. paid website where there's a lot of. YouTube Sensations out there that are. showing training and you can get that. for free yeah so it is and it's I I. won't do the the free video stuff and. and the reason being it's not a money. thing it really is you you really don't. have any control of who those videos are. going to and where do I get that from. well I I spoke at an FBI Academy.

conference which had a lot of Law. Enforcement Officers a lot of former FBI. trainers and I sat down with them and. they're great guys you know of course. it's not all formal functions I'm with a. bunch of cops man so of course we're. going to go to the bar a little bit and. enjoy enjoy have some food and but I I. remember coming back and I sat with one. of the officers and he goes you know. you've had Don ship Leon I know he goes. you know I watched John's videos but now. it's starting to bother me a lot of. these videos out there cuz they're.

teaching all these tactics and they. don't know they have no control of who's. getting them and the Dallas uh police. off Dallas chief of police came in and. they had that tactical shooting where. some officers died and he was one of the. speakers at that event as well and it. kind of hit home to me I was like. man he's exactly right we're putting all. these videos and God bless him I have. nothing wrong to say about I don't know. Don we've never met I support what he. does I think you know he's a from what. I've seen he looks like he's a standup.

guy and I'm just throwing that as. example because that's what the law. enforcement officer said the police he's. from Philadelphia he's like we just you. know we're really we're really getting. not upset but he says we're really. worried that the bad guys are starting. to watch these videos out there well I. mean there's a caveat to that too you. know I mean what the are people supposed. to do we've defunded the police the. border is wide open yeah they are. actively sending $887 million a week to.

the. tal sorry man you know what I mean. but people have to be able to defend. themselves and that's where they go to. do it and they go and and so and that. stuff's out there no matter what and. that's where it's just it's it's where I. can at least have some control though. and you know what I mean I mean people. are I 100% get your point and it didn't. make he said it too yeah till he said. there is context there's a things aren't. the same as they used to.

me the people it's dangerous out there I. mean Chicago is the murder capital of. the country and more people are dying. there than they did in Iraq and. Afghanistan and it's no shock that that. is one of my most I've arranged with the. Chicago cop OD defense Daniel Lumbard. tremendous guy we've got a range called. the compound I don't think that's any. coincidence that the major that are. those are the biggest classes that I. will have when I teach out there at the. compound in Creek Illinois it's run by.

Daniel Lumbard divide defense is his. training company but he's a he's a lead. Farm instructor for the Chicago PD he's. getting older now so he's off the street. now he's teaching but but you're right. it's just this where where do I find. some responsibility and again I never. thought of it that way until I talked to. I was like you know he's he's got a. point so I'm not going to stop doing. videos don't came no that's not going to. happen but where can I at least have. some control I'm not going to stop. teaching tactics with my classes.

well T you're hypocrite no I at least. have some control I know who I'm. teaching I at least have something and. if and have we turned students away when. I couldn't verify what they could carry. criminal yeah we have I've done that so. I'm not ever going to tell guys to stop. teaching tactics and it's an outlet for. us too it's therapeutic for us but I I. would just say after talking to that. police officer then getting back to the. E3 stuff being a paid website I don't. have a problem with it being paid. because we have some control of at least.

who the members are and who's watching. and if it's somebody. that maybe is a criminal shouldn't be. huning a weapon we have some little. control that we can all right I'm I. can't stop from learning from other guys. but you're out like we can't teach. anymore but getting back to the E3 again. it has been a upoad uphill climb with it. because it is a paid website and you can. get the training for free on YouTube or. Instagram and but you know from tactics.

are tactics are tactics shooting is. fundamentals there is no secret sauce. there's no Jedi mind trick you're not. going to I'm not going to be teaching. you how to use the force the way I shoot. you can go watch another shooter and. you're going to get the same stuff it. it's just a presentation who do you like. what what resonates with you so yeah. E3 has been good and I think it's. wonderful because we're part of an. outdoor or tell them hey go go do. something and fire shooting is outdoor. shooting is relaxing at least in my.

opinion shooting is you're outside in. the fresh air or you're at least doing. something active it's a sport it really. is I mean [ __ ] you have you have the. competitions the usca you have all those. the tag games it's a sport now and it. should be like that the reason I'm. getting in why I talk about it and the. paid and not paid is is really and why I. don't do more unpaid YouTube videos. online I don't I don't do that that's. why I don't and is because I don't have. control of who's watching it and and it.

was that conversation with that. Philadelphia police officer and then. listening to he spoke before I spoke the. Dallas chief of police and not he wasn't. condemning it at all he's just saying. this guy knew what he was doing he had. some tactics and say know what he was. doing he knew how to pie yeah he knew. how to he knew how to Edge a corner well. Chris before we get to deep into the. interview everybody gets a gift oh no. man you're all gifted.

nothing but Hospitality oh man they're. gummies that's right those are legal in. all 50 states fortunately or maybe. unfortunately for you I don't know but. they are made here in the USA oh that's. what and uh yeah so there you go some. vigilance League gummy those are hard to. come by by the way and this is actually. this is going on my side by side when I. get home right on it'll be at the range. man and thank you thank so much and uh. do you we need to bring manufacturing.

back to this country man the only thing. we manufacture now is drama and freaking. political [ __ ] that's right there. more manufacturing thank you man you're. welcome one last thing yeah yeah before. we get in I got a patreon account they. are my top supporters have been here. with me since the beginning and um. they're the reason I'm here and you're. here so uh one of the things I do is I. give them the opportunity to ask each. guest a question uhoh and so this one is.

from. moose what's up. moose what was it like for you to see. the Obama Administration blatantly lie. about something you saw firsthand blame. the attack on something unrelated and. refused to call it a terrorist attack. how did it feel to be on the ground at. the annex and realize that help was not. coming let's do one question first well. let's go first first with the help not. coming and that's we'll just go on a.

timeline there we can skip that we'll do. that we'll do that okay so give me give. me number cuz the feeling what was it. like for you to see the Obama. Administration blatantly lie about. something you saw I mean I can tell. watch uh Fox and Friends the last last. uh interview I ever did on Fox and. Friends with Pete hex it was back in. 2014 or 15 where he would somebody. caught him on a cell phone uh it was. either at laa or one of those one of. those liberal colleges there in Chicago. I I can't remember which one and he said.

Benghazi was a conspiracy he didn't know. he was being filmed and of course they. threw it on the TV it's at 6:00 in the. morning I was just I was in actually in. Springfield I was going to go speak at a. uh an event that was sponsored by the. guy that owns Bass Pro so I was staying. out up the Bass Pro Resort up there. and um told Pete I couldn't be there I. said I got to zoom in so I zoomed in at. 6:00 a.m. and you I'm half asleep I've. been this was my fifth speaking event in. like 7 days just spent and pissed me off.

why would it of course it pissed me I. mean all those lines continually it was. angry it made me full of hate and what. did I say you can watch it it's out. there on YouTube somewhere I'm sure um. he said what did you feel after you. watched Benghazi called it conspiracy. and I said well Pete I said I wanted to. reach through the TV and I wanted to. choke his ass I wanted to choke him out.

and Pete his eyes got big he goes you. yeah probably don't want to be. threatening his former US president I. said Peter you asked me that was my last. ever fox interview actually I ever did. and I did get visited by the Secret. Service two weeks later luckily I knew. the guys they showed up at my house like. Chris we we got to be here you're. threaten a president on national TV and. uh but if that tells you my anger right. there I mean who without even thinking. skipping a beat and it wasn't to create.

uh it wasn't to troll accounts it wasn't. to do clickbait it was an immediate. reaction as soon as I saw it it was like. that. mother and I didn't want to kill it I'm. let's get in the ring I'm put you in a. lock and let's see how you feel man. that's what I felt so of course I was. angry I was angry for a lot of years and. I think if you watch even there's. speeches that I've done out there I. still do corporate talks I just did you. know that's why I'm in Nashville and do. your show and I did a talk at the at the. Gaylord there.

um in the early days the speeches were. very very angry because nobody was being. held accountable mhm and there were. people that were calling us liars and. there were and that's that's hard to. it's hard to be called a liar guys when. I saw ran and I was shooting over their. heads when that last those three mortars. through a fire for effect hit right on. top of building SE the fifth attack that. night and I was shooting and it wasn't. the movie showed his daytime it was. actually uh it was um uh before morning.

nautical twilight you know was right. before the you know you know what that. is your viewers can Google that it's. right before the sun comes up so it's. still dark so my night vision was still. on my 15s were on and um remember the. first one hit blew up on the back side. of building he was right over the top R. spun he went cylic on that Bel fed which. was pretty freaking awesome cuz all I'm. seeing is a laser beam as he turns and. they're coming to attack us through the. through the Sheep slaughterhouse herea I. put a few is over his head cuz I want to.

get in the fight even though I can't see. that because I'm I'm back behind them on. building a he's on Building C Dave Dave. uben shoots Roz is up there he shoots. bub is up there he's shooting so I'm. seeing all this far shooting I'm. thinking [ __ ] mortar's this way they got. to be bringing that whole Force. following those mortars in so I turn. around make sure nobody's coming. nobody's there come back two more shots. I see one hit directly right on top that. vision goes completely white you know. his over abundance like white as comes. back I saw four and now there's three so.

guy disappeared and I can hear him. screaming even in all that I can still. hear him it was Dave I didn't know it at. the time but it was uben just Shar it. sheared his leg off sheared his arm they. were hanging so not completely gone but. he's legs this way Arms This Way how do. I know that TIG got up there when he saw. Dave TIG told me what his arm his arms. or legs look. like take a few more shots cuz what can. you do we're still getting attacked. we're in the middle of a fight you know. it is you don't you can't stop fighting. what am I to run off my building and go. help he's got three guys up there I got.

to keep fighting I got my sector behind. me I got to take I turn around I come. back they're still shooting I took two. more shots and then I saw boom boom boom. if you've been in artillery you call for. fire and you know what that is that's. far for effect they're right where they. want to hit night vision goes white and. as it comes back all I see is the pixie. dust it got quiet it got silent really. weird I thought they were going to keep. coming and uh all I saw was the charged. particles cuz you know blow up explosion.

the debris of the Dust gets either. heated or charged and it looks like it. does it looks like pixie dust coming. down with those more uh with my night. vision starts to come back and refocus. from the the white. light and they're all gone and it it my. brain my brain said your team just got. turned to dust it's like ho I mean it. was it was it was and it maybe it felt. like longer than what it was it was only. a few seconds but I put my head down and. I remember thinking and it was the one.

time negatively I thought that every. other time and there was negative things. happen that was the one time where it. was like that holy [ __ ] we might lose. this and I said man we can't beat this. I'm thinking to myself we don't have any. air support they're going to [ __ ]. keep hammering us and you know God God. God was there all night man and God. kicked me in my ass and said get your. gun up Ranger and I know people are. going oh [ __ ] that's no making no that's. what happened what do you mean God. kicked you in the ass and said get up. quit whining quit feeling like a victim.

so you is that a feeling you got is that. a voice you heard voice in the back of. my head right there I still feel it I. don't get chills and maybe it was my mom. saying it you but it was to me it was. that voice of God was something saying. we don't quit you don't quit Get Your. Gun up keep fighting I said get your gun. up Ranger that's what I heard and that's. being a ranger too and that's what. Rangers are when you're at the 75th Get. Your Gun Up Get Your Gun up you're not. quitting keep fighting keep pressing. through you learn that from rip which is.

option 40 now a rasp now you learn that. throughout that's what's instilled in. you Rangers before you what they do in. Vietnam the hunter killer teams they ran. towards the fight what they do when they. jumped into rioo they ran towards the. fight there's no cover they shot their. way off the off the Earth the tarmac and. Grenada what' they do they ran towards. the fight now get your gun up. Ranger even though I'm excited for the. new Administration there's a lot of. tension in the world Russia Ukraine the. Border inflation who knows what could.

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APR rates in the five start at. 6.45% for well-qualified borrowers call. 866 781 8900 for details about credit. cost and. terms why and so why am I so angry. because when somebody calls it. conspiracy and I watched I watched WR. I watched ran and Bub and Dave and do at.

the time I thought all I watched them. evaporate that's what I my brain like. holy [ __ ] those guys are they they're. gone I've seen death before but have you. ever saw where your friends just like. they're there and they're. not so when he said it was a conspiracy. it's like hell yeah I was pissed off and. I was pissed off for many many years and. it it did hurt a lot of relation hurt my. relationship with my wife my kids at the. time um so d That's I mean it's a great. question but it also points to how how.

irresponsible politicians are with their. words yeah and and how they they don't. give a [ __ ] and him especially you know. Hillary got what she deserved she wasn't. president she was humiliated she lost is. she going to get more yeah she's going. to get more when she when she stands. before her make her with God God's going. to judge her and I hope he judges her. and he's going to it's going to judge. her well how she should Obama's the one. that got over scottf free he was the. commander-in-chief come on man who's.

supposed to help get people to us is it. Hillary and state department granted she. was hugely responsible so was Leon. Panetta General ham could have done. something but who was the commander-in. chief who was General ham he was the he. was the euro comp Commander he was the. one that and for everybody knows Leon. Panetta was director of CIA at the time. at the time and then he went to the se. you know became SE Def and all that but. actually um but um you know he could. have done something too and uh but Obama.

is the one that really is the one that's. held respon should have been held. responsible for it. all you know and also with the rhetoric. Al-Qaeda remember people forget that. what was his platform at the time. Al-Qaeda was on the Run terrorism is. dead he knew it wasn't that's who. attacked us you you had siron she knows. it better than anybody who was the one. that masterminded that zaah Hari what. he's number two alqaeda so brother the. the guy that got away with it and then.

continued to try to press a narrative. which we see happen I got a question I. don't want to get too I wasn't expecting. to get this deep I'm that's just me man. I I go down rabbit H all the time what I. want to ask though is is I can see I can. see the rage returning right now it does. it come of course it's going to come so. what what was. the what was the turning point that kind. of eased that rage that interview was. one.

because like with Pete ath yeah that. because it was it it was the last. mainstream interview I ever. did was that your terms or theirs mine I. said I'm not going to do anymore I I. told them I'm done um that was mine I'm. not doing that because I got I did get. asked two times to go on Tucker and. nothing against him I like him I just. I'm not doing that because that's what. they want to get I started to real. that's what they want to get out of me. they wanted they know Tel's going to. come in and say something that's going. to clickbait and going to be pissed off.

cuz that's how I always was I am very I. get I'm animated I'm going to say what's. on my mind and if it pisses somebody so. what I'm going to tell you how I feel. and that's great for Ratings it is um. and I but and nothing against I got. friends down there Sean's a ni Hannity's. a nice guy man you know the uh the the. deuces are they're nice people you know. Martha mccullum's she nicely treated me. very very well there not it just. was it was my family and my relationship. cuz I got divorced at that time as well.

so that anger had carried over to where. my wife and my kids like we don't want. you around anymore your toxicity is here. you're just always pissed off you're. never happy and we had gotten divorced. so when I did that we were actually. divorced at that time and it was I got. to get myself right. cuz so it was it was doing the. interviews that brought the rage back I. think just reliving it all and not being. able to handle it and finding a silver. lining to it which there always is a. silver lining God gives us a silver. lining for everything that we do we just.

got to find it how do you feel about. doing this interview that's I'm good. because I'm at peace with it all I don't. have a problem getting I know it's going. to bring anger out of me but does it. make me angry when I leave no I'm going. home to see my kids and I want to tell. this. because I still talk to Tai's mom Cheryl. Bennett wonderfully love her I'm she's. she I'm her second m i mean she's my. second mom and telling this keeps their. memories alive where back then it was. more of it's about me I need to show you.

how angry I am I need to show you how. pissed off I am I need it was. selfish very now it's I'm going tell you. because I want people to know that so. when they hear a liberal they hear an. Obama they heal a Hillary they heal hear. a Biden say it was conspiracy I was. video a protest they're can say no I. know that dude's telling the truth cuz. just look how emotionally gets and if of. course it's emotional I saw my teammates. die they were my friends I me we weren't. best friends or nothing but they were. still my teammates and they still were.

my friends and so they tried the powers. at be tried to cover it up but that was. a turning point somewhat cuz 6 months. later I did put a gun in my head we'll. get there yeah for starters yeah where. did you grow up uh Colorado Alamosa. Colorado loved it um grandmother and. grandmother grand um my grandmother and. grandfather were were immigrants from. Mexico my Garcia man my mom's dad's West. Texas mom's a Garcia but so we grew up.

uh we grew up in the you know lower. middle class but it was Wonder wonderful. childhood Alamos a small little town in. the Sanger at Crystal range out there in. Southern Colorado and uh then we go to. visit my grandmother and grandfather who. were Pickers and then they own their own. farm so I saw them just a hard work man. it was amazing I loved I loved being a. Ponto but I also loved being a Garcia I. me my middle name is after my. grandfather Wen Christian Wen so it was. it was awesome and it was just always.

happy you know always playing I'd play. with the wet we call them the wet backs. I know that's a that's a that's a uh. politically incorrect term but that's. what we the migrant workers that would. come over work on my grandfather's Farm. Webbs man. Pickers but I remember going out and. that we would play baseball with them. when they come from the. field uh I remember one actually saved. my life I playing hide-and-seek in a. back of potato truck and I was running. away from my cousin hit a bar that was.

across the top cracked my head open and. I laid there for about 5 minutes before. one of them carried me out found me. bleed and all over and he carried me out. to my grandmother's. house I mean it just it was amazing fun. it was a rough it was a rough childhood. you know was a rough fun spin your knee. up ride dirt bikes take your lab out go. little hunting with the 22 or or with. the with a pallet gun it was wonderful. man skin crack your head open once or. twice. brothers and sisters I have two uh I.

have a brother and a sister and you know. me and my sister we have our issues but. we're close it's a close family it's not. like there's not any hatred my brother. no my brother he's awesome him and I. it's one of those relationships though. it's like he'll call and all say what's. up jackass hey I say yeah what's up. douchebag I love you man and two years. younger than me we played Sports. together growing up and Athletics was. huge in the family my dad was a football. coach uh NCA football coach so when we. were in Alamosa he was the head coach at.

Adam State and the athletic director. then we moved to Brigham Young we moved. to Utah because he got a job uh as an. assistant at briam University and that. was a one hell of an experience you I. look back at it now I was like wow I was. blessed because that was during their G. their glor years so I got to hang around. a clubhouse with G McMahon and Steve. Young and Robbie BOS and and National. Championship team and you know you're. taking it for granted you had Lil. Edwards who they don't make coaches you. know that was like the iconic coaches.

when coaches were actually coaches and. not public figures you know lvll Edwards. Paul be Bryant you guys like that what. he you know just the old school he was. awesome but you know you had Mike. holgren there who was the offensive. coordinator who later became the coach. of the Packers won two Super Bowls um. Norm Chow who was he was a legend in the. NCA went to USC wow Andy Reid was a. graduate assistant there at the time. coach so you know I look back like man I.

was around some cool and you just and. all I'm doing I'm a kid running around. the clubhouse playing catch with Steve. Young going to the schol yes so uh so. Sports were big you know and I wanted to. play football and I played football um. we moved to Oregon State my dad got a. job Oregon State and we he it was. wonderful there got to be around you. know the pack 10 I was a ball boy on the. sidelines for the pack 10 that was so. fun just being at the games you know and. that was that was pack 10 at the time I. mean that's Washington uccl USC when. they were I mean they're still good I.

can't but they was it was amazing it was. just good good time being around College. when I college was College when it. wasn't yeah propaganda let protest about. everything it was it was College it was. PCU man it was where people would make. fun of that yeah let's go have a you. know so and it was a it was college tals. now Bram young was a little different. this more and you know there's it's. you're not going to find a lot of drink. in there but uh and then we he got a job. um um in Colorado back in Colorado and.

uh we moved and uh still he's still. coaching at Mesa it's called Colorado. it's called Mesa college at the time was. called Colorado Mesa University now and. uh we moved there and of course being. around Sports forever and I my dad was a. football player my mom was a pretty good. athlete in her own right you know I got. some good genes in me and I managed to. get a scholarship to play football and I. played football for four years at. actually I. did yeah I I uh. yeah I was I I was I was had a good time.

man so your dad wasn't the coach uh he. was the ad at I went to that and to be. what does that mean he was the athletic. director at that college but um I didn't. go there first I I wasn't I was a. typical college football player I'd. rather drink and party than go to class. so my first year at Mesa I flunked out. of college and I had to go to a junior. college to get my grades up so I could. continue to play football so I went to. uh it's it was called Dixie at the time. because of the wokeness and political.

correctness now it's called something. else but we were called the Dixie Rebels. I'm still a Dixie Rebel for all you. whatever you call the college now it was. awesome that was a wonderful experience. because Dixie was like the program where. BYU UNLV University of Utah would send. all these truants to get their grades up. and so we were a football fan I mean we. were awesome we were number one in the. nation we finished finished number two. one year so I'm around there and I'm.

around gangsters man I'm around the. Donner Street Crips I'm around West. Coast Bloods Tonga [ __ ] gangsters then. you got Farm kids coming from Utah big. farm boys and we had this it was such a. wonderful experience it was a wonderful. to see so many I was out of you know so. many people of different backgrounds and. nationalities come together for a focus. to win games sounds like the military it. does and it sounds like you that's why I. laugh when I hear all these Dei Pro all. this so we had diversity way back then.

guys and guess what we were called the. Dixie Rebels too and not one black dude. gave two shits we were proud to be. called the rebels that's what we were. and I was you know I I wasn't as true I. mean they were. hardcore I just flunked out of school. now you know I I ain't going to lie my. ethnicity did help it does he's Mexican. dude and they my grandpa yeah it was it. it it it allowed me to at least have. have a foot in the door where okay we.

can kind of trust this guy and and. stereotypes stereotypes for a reason I. have no problem with that um but it was. one hell of an experience because we. were so good and it was fun playing on a. team of so many different characters and. what got me is that was back in the day. when Bloods and Crips they were you know. that was a big deal there's gang. violence all the time and there was a. guy named Stacy he was a West Coast. blood he came from Los Angeles in and. then we had a guy named Chucky who was. best athletes I've ever seen in my life. he was a Donna Street [ __ ] from.

Vegas and I went to Stacy one day cuz I. I didn't get I'm I'm this naive kid from. Colorado you know I don't know what I. can ask or what I can I say. hey how come you guys aren't killing. each other you I'm being an IDI should I. say that I I'm 19 years old who I what. am I saying the right thing and Stacy. looks at me and he goes he goes on the. streets man yeah he said we would I said. I'd shoot that [ __ ] but here I. just want to. win I was like wow that just makes so.

much sense wow and that's also when I. started going the military and then even. GRS a lot of people don't know o and I. don't get along we never have I was. going to wait till the end of the. interview no and I'm sorry I didn't mean. to jump to that let's well I mean you. brought it up let's do it now I've. always I've I mean obviously I've been. following you guys I mean we were in the. same profession of course yeah and I.

remember after it happened you guys you. know you did the book movie came out. lots of speaking events I thought you. guys used to speak together we had to. yeah and then it seemed like everything. kind of I mean. look what happened why don't you guys. get along well it's just personalities. they're nothing O is a wonderful. wonderful person he is in his own right. it's just personalities very I'm very. outspoken whenever we do speeches or.

things like that he always wanted to. kind of play like the politician I got. to make both sides out I was like screw. this say what happened so we had went at. odds but even when we were down range it. just was personalities man it just was. you just there's just some guys you. don't get along did you guys butd heads. before Benghazi it's the first place we. worked at together I'd never worked them. before that was the first first base. that I worked with Oz at in immediately. budded heads it's just one of those. bases where you know the guy come a guy. comes in and you're man we just don't.

driive he doesn't he doesn't like my. Jack ashery I don't like him being so. damn. uptight. but we were both professional enough and. this is this is a Kudo to ran as well. ran really was our was our team leader. we had an official team leader Ron was. our assistant team leader we had a you. know we had a staffer that was our team. leader but Ron is who we listen to the. staffer we never listened to isn't it. funny how that's like the common theme. well when you don't hold the. every JS team that the staffer is always.

the weakest link you don't hold them to. the same standard then they're always. going to be they get mad at me when I. say this stuff tough [ __ ] dude there. it's the truth I mean I can count good. Stafford and I'll tell the St there are. some that but the majority of the good. staffers were the ones that had the same. background we'll get into this later but. anyway yeah with with o it it was. nothing where and it wasn't a hatred it. just was we don't like each other man. yeah yeah and you get to an age at 42 at. that point where maybe in the early days.

in our 30s maybe we would have F you Fu. just but it wasn't like that it was just. you're you're I'm 40 he's 45 I'm 42 it's. like there's no reason to create any. more drama deal with each other how we. need. to just win because I still kept going. to my head what Stacy said to me about. the Crips and the Bloods we just want to. win let's put the differences aside so. we can win the focus and that's that's. that's also wrong keeping on hey what's. the what's the main focus here guys.

everybody goes home put your stupid. differences aside shut the hell up and. do your jobs you got your right and left. limits you got your right and left. limits and we stayed within those and it. wasn't like a man you're a de it wasn't. like that it was just you know you're in. a room you're just in a room with. somebody that you just don't get along. with so you stay in there as long as you. can and then you get out and you go do. your thing and you'll go to his thing it. is a lot more difficult cuz you've been. on a lot of those bases doing this where. you're on top of each other so it's. harder to get away get away but we did.

you know and you know and Rowan wasn't. dumb enough to put us rooming together. in the same room you know it was one of. those things let's let's make it as as. possible and there you always at least. at that point in time because of my age. and experience and I think this is. important for everybody even if people. you don't like you find things that you. can respect about them and I do again I. he's tough as Nails the dude got hit. with a mortar and tried to get up and. shoot I saw him I told told you in the. beginning I saw a guy get up and try to. shoot after that Mor mortar stopped and.

he the gun kept falling cuz he would get. up and he shoot and I'd see the. rounds well his arm he hadn't realized. his arm had gotone F so when you watch. 13 hours and you see him getting up like. that that happened that wasn't movie. Magic that happened so do I respect his. toughness hell yeah and he said one of. the coolest things i' ever heard in my. life when we drove to the airport he's. bleeding out his arms about coming off. we wanted to help get him on that plane. that executive Jet and he said this and.

I'll give him crudos for it cuz it was. some Clint Eastwood [ __ ] he goes I. walked into this country I'm walking out. that wasn't a movie Magic that wasn't a. line written and he said that and I. remember what I heard I was like all. right a may not get along but that's. some cool ass [ __ ] right there and and. and so you cannot get along that's fine. but you still find ways to respect each. other and work together because the goal. is to win and I kept thinking about.

Stacy the West Coast blood the most. intellectual wise thing I heard was from. a 20-year-old gangster from Los Angeles. we just want to. win it's that simple and I think that's. why when I talk to corporations I tell. that's part of my speech just win you. that that's the goal let's win yeah put. the differences aside and uh that's why. also when we were out doing are speaking. and you're seeing us on. TV all right we got to put on a United.

front here we're stronger together and. because there wasn't hatred there it. just was a dislike just didn't like. didn't care our personalities just. didn't mesh it wasn't that hard to go in. there and do an interview together and. Oz had great things to say because he. was there he saw things that I didn't. that helped expose the BS because we. were in different spots the whole time. um let's. let's move back. to yeah kind of gr up we're past CH.

we're past childhood I want to get to. this but I want it to all be in one. piece if that's okay yeah no no no no. you're good and so what so your football. football got College what got your. interest in the military U God just path. when you're short and you're slow you're. not going to go to the next level and I. was I was really short and but I was. super slow so the NFL didn't. come knocking at my door so I I remember.

I I was just walking through the Student. Union building there at Colorado Mesa at. Mesa college was called the time and you. know at the graduation there's job fairs. at these colleges if you go to college. you are going to see a job fair and I'm. walking through and um all these jobs. are but of course who's there with all. the all the occupations all the. corporations the vultures are over there. in the corner the Army recruiter the. marine recruiter the Navy recruiter the. Air Force recruiter and you know long. story short on on that one which is not. going to be the theme here but they.

yelled they said hey you I was the. stupid enough one to look in that. direction I walked over there they said. hey uh what are you going to do after. and you know I had thought about FBI I. had thought about federal police every. time I went to apply for one I'd get a. call hey you need experience you got to. go become a police officer you got to go. endure uh you got to go to the military. you got and police just didn't sound fun. to me um so I walked over there I saw. the ranger video I saw the recruiting.

video which was a 75th Ranger video so. they're jumping out of planes fast. roping they showed me the seal challenge. video the Navy guy did so I'm watching. the Hilo cast and I'm watching the low. cast I'm seeing all the cool stuff MH. you know the Marines they're landing on. the beach um you know the Recon there's. so many recon guys uh the Air Force One. I always make this a joke I say I saw. the Air Force One and you know they were. in a air conditioned room nice. comfortable with good food. now they're sh me the Jets and things. and I just thought the Rangers was was.

the best one for me and so I said signed. up I signed up I enlisted right there. after I got my bachelor's degree no. kidding and uh yeah 30 days later I'm. off to Fort Benning and um did that you. literally signed up right there at the. job and the scariest thing did [ __ ] talk. about an Impulse like like I was like. what am I going to do and you know I had. well FBI they said military and I do. remember telling the recruiter I asked. him I go is that hard he goes yeah I go.

do people quit he goes yeah all right. let's do it and um so move on and we go. to Fort Benning Georgia and uh it it did. I was like a a a round Peg and a round. hole I just fit you know I was I went to. uh it was Sand Hill at the time it was. Echo company 258 called the house of. pain that was like supposed to be the. hardest one there but come on they're. all the hardest every if PR basic. training Depot is the hardest one but um.

The Stingers Honor Graduate I did really. well I just it just fit it just made you. know it's physically fit I got the the. Athletics completely prepped me for it. you know the teamwork aspect of it you. just had to get used to the yelling and. they were still smacking us around it. was 1995 which if you didn't deserve to. get smacked around then you didn't get. smacked and that made sense to me it was. based on Merit you work your ass it's. Merit based you're going to perform. you're going to do what you're told. we're going to move you up you're going. to be a smartass you're going to be lazy. you're going to be a fat body no then.

you don't it's easy it's piece of cake. yeah and um went to Airborne school but. I was married to my first wife at the. time and nothing against she's a. wonderful person we just got married way. too young just nothing bad to say about. her but she was having an affair so I. got my jod letter you hey I want a. divorce um and it really was hard from. there on out Airborne school on out. because that wasn't something I ever. expected that wasn't something in my.

family that happened divorce didn't. happen to me that wasn't even on my. radar yeah and it was wow what this is. so I'm fighting Airborne School Airborne. school is easy just all you got to do is. learn how to fall and break yourself and. then jump out of a plane um it was it. was memorable there was a memorable. thing about Airborne school though that. was awesome again God looking out um my. first two jumps first day jump and first. night jump I was the first one out the. door it was so awesome being able to.

have the door open first jump and I'm. watching that was cool it's memorable I. and the night jump too I was like how. lucky am I to be how did that happen I. got lucky to be the first one out the. door so you know your door opens you get. to watch all that [ __ ] for about 30. seconds before you go but Airborne. school then went through rip got through. rang rip went second bat and we're there. I was there for about eight months and. you know you're an un untabbed guy and. you've been around Rangers you know for. tabbed at ranger battalion we're [ __ ]. we're piece we're getting hazed I mean.

it's just it's miserable you're hiding. in your team room on the weekends. because you don't want the tab Spec 4 to. come in there and smoke your balls and. haste the [ __ ] out you so you just like. either hide or you take off for the. weekend and um but um went on a JRX. training Mission at Bragg about eight. months in I was at Battalion and the. joint redness exercise so we're doing a. joint redness exercise with blue green. um some PJs and then the Air Force guys.

at Pope the spec Ops the Spectre and you. know and task force was there too. nightstalkers were there too so it's a. big thing yeah was it was pretty awesome. so I mean I'm a private I'm just but I'm. fighting this divor I mean I'm my wife's. cheating on me you know and it's just. killing me did you know who she was. cheating no I I mean I at that that. first two weeks it was it was a it was a. two-e JX the first week I still hadn't. figured it out I I was in deny more than. anything you know that's no way she's. doing that and this is for the aditt and.

cell phone cell phones are a big thing. so to go home to call you had to go. actually go to a pay phone so it wasn't. like I could call and check all the time. like you could now which maybe that. would have made it worse maybe this made. it better this but I'm a new private I'm. around all these tier one guys I'm just. holy [ __ ] dude I'm should I you know and. when you're a new guy you have that. bravado but should I be here you know. tab spec fours you got tab Squad leaders. tab e5s these guys this is old hat to. them I'm like oh my gosh and so the. stress levels for me don't [ __ ] up don't.

[ __ ] up I got two hernas on my first. jump too so I'm don't want to tell. nobody cuz I got two little aliens going. there when we jumped in is it Sicily at. Brag I can't remember the the Drop Zone. um but anyway it all came to to head and. I called home and I sh an answer so I. finally called my brother Mike love him. I go hey what's going on with Stacy man. he goes dude I I I don't want to tell. you and as soon as he said that you know. I I like crap cuz it was in Den n and I. went home on block Leaf cuz it was right.

after that we're going on block Leaf. which right before Christmas and uh I. just I went to the guy's house and I hid. in his bushes I was going to kill him. and I came to my. sensus which was great on my end because. I got out of there but it was also where. I even felt like a bigger failure cuz. like man I can't even do this I the. biggest [ __ ] in the world but God has. God's got me you guys and but of course. everybody found out small town Grand. Junction Colorado um military found out.

of course. because very lucky I instead of going to. jail um I got to go to the VA here in. Grand Junction they threw me in the. mental War like to check on course so. the military so the wheels are turning. that I'm going to get so hold on did you. get caught um actually I what I did is I. went back home I drank myself silly and. my friend found me on the floor my. Ranger buddy who I joined with that was. home two want leave he found me on the. floor just I was just drunk and took a.

bunch of Tylenol and yeah it's just so. you tried to kill yourself yeah. 1997 six or seven 96 in 96 holy [ __ ] and. um yeah it's just one of those things. because it is it's you're young you're. pissed vinegar you're full of fire. you're a ranger dude someone was going. to you know but I wasn't ready it just. was being young and stupid and and doing. stupid things impulsively that young. people do especially young guys like.

yourself and myself were just we're not. thinking we're just action first. consequences later and um but the. military found out and of course they. are and we of course we called the. commander and the commander found and I. had I had wonderful that so blessed. first sergeant was Frank grippy Ranger. Legend sergeant major grippy [ __ ] you. know he was dropping mortars and tubes. and an uh in torbo in Anaconda when he. was t mountain he was a sergeant major.

he was my first sergeant and we also had. Captain uh Paul a camera who I think. he's a three star general now he may. have just retired but he was my CEO and. they I mean I wasn't going to stay in. there's no way I could stay in but I. managed to get an honorable discharge. and I didn't I didn't deserve it so I. only finished two years out of my first. four-year contract well how long did it. uh take you to snap out of that well I I. went home it took me two years well I. had two years I have a choice the uh. real you got out let me sorry yeah yeah.

yeah so you left I left the Army you. left the Army at the end of 1996 at the. end of 1996 and then went back to your. hometown I went back to my hometown and. uh was like I can't do this anymore and. and what were you doing in your hometown. nothing just being miserable you know. you're it was it was miserable I was but. it was with family you know my my mom's. there my dad's there my brothers are. there so I'm surrounded by family my. friends are still there cuz I just. really been two years out of college I. still had guys i' played football with.

that are still finishing up and I had a. buddy of mine named Brian Edwards he. goes did you look like [ __ ] and I moved. in with them I I hung out with my. buddies you know my parents were there. but I I moved into a room one of their. ex football players they were still. playing with my teammates houses and. they went on a and I saw recommend. everybody to do when you go through. divorce I went to South par Island for. spring break spring. break he goes what happened there Chris. she's like dude you look miserable we're. going to spring break come on get in the. car we're going I was like okay we went.

and I went to South paron for spring. break and I remember this the Lord I am. beon the Lord Works mysterious ways I'm. serious it's just so am you I look back. at it now I'm like my gosh God really. does have control I go there hold on can. I can I make a prediction yeah yeah yeah. did you meet your current wife there get. the [ __ ] out of are you serious [ __ ] I. went there hold on hold on long had you. been were you a divorced we were divor. yeah we well we had been un officially.

divorced for only about 6 months but we. she had tried to divorce me and get rid. of me at basic training so it' been so. you're like depressed at home yeah. drinking yourself to death tried to. commit suicide with a bottle of Tylenol. and now I'm going like what am I going. to now your buddi like we're going to. South but I need you to smile again and. Brian I love Brian he is he is all he is. and he was a he was a a he was a really. good football player outstanding wide. receiver out there but we go there and.

this is what's so funny and it's funny. but I also I do believe there's cupid is. out there cuz we're at Charlie's it's a. bar there no it's Louis we're at Louis. Lou Louis bar and something and I'm. dancing you know and but I'm still. jacked I'm a ranger shredded you I'm. jacked up shirts off cuz I'm woohoo I'm. spring break drinking drinking and all. of a sudden the Searing pain. all flows down the side of my face and. my eyes well it was before Fireball so.

they had the shots of cinnamon snobs. that the little ladies would carry. around somebody had knocked a whole. thing on. me and I look and it was my wife my. current wife I look I it's like cupid. zero it's like wow wow and we danced we. were inseparable that whole spring break. I stayed with her wait hold on what was. the. oneliner picked up who uh actually. uh I still think she I tell her I said. you spilled that that cinnamon schnaps.

on me on purpose didn't you cuz you saw. my heaving chest and I was show she was. like that was so there but that's the. that was actually the joke and it wasn't. because I still believe you saw me and. you did that on purpose didn't you just. so i' look at you and I looked at her. and she's a volleyball player from. univers Nebraska Omaha I me she you know. volleyball players come on you watch. watch college volleyball. and uh you know she's taller than me. she's 5'10 I'm 5'9 she's 5'10 and uh.

just. athletic and man that was it and and. again the whole spring break so there. wasn't a one liner but it was I do give. her [ __ ] for like I said you did that. [ __ ] on purpose because you saw my man. Boo from all them push-ups and uh it was. awesome and um so when I went home it. gave me a direction so I went back home. like okay I the stipulations my. honorable discharges I had to still I. had to stay out for 2 years I couldn't. reinlist for 2 years it came in the in.

my my file um and uh my dad had his. Doctorate my mother she was a teacher. she had her. Masters was the logical step here let's. go back to college so I applied to. University of Braska Omaha took the GRE. got accepted and I got into my Bronco. too and luckily I made it to Omaha and I. lived in a $100 and 10mon room in in the. slums of. Oma Omaha is a wonderful place but it. was the poor SE of Omaha no air.

conditioning nothing and it was. wonderful it's wonderful it was. just it was just it was like I'm out of. a terrible element and here I am by. myself no money Bronco twos don't run so. it's in a crappy car I'm still fighting. double hernia surgery cuz I hadn't got. my hernas fixed yet um but it was like. man this is awesome and the only person. I know is this woman that spilled drinks. on me that I spent four days with South.

P Island and she was she was awesome and. we just we dated and and I just got my. life together I went back to school um. the VA got my [ __ ] fixed I got my hernas. fixed there I was there um grad school. to me was was the school I say it's easy. but the ability to to go to school and. then also work and it wasn't hard. because the military was so you you you. you know was regimented you you could do. multiple things and not get enough sleep. and still get it done it was easy so I.

got a job at M of Omaha working as a. security guard go to school and my. classes I could take at UNO a lot of the. grad classes were in the evening so I. would take classes and a lot of those. graduate school classes I wasn't for. criminal justice I still thinking maybe. the fed's down the line even while I'm. done but it was one a week so one. three-hour class a week I could take and. then it was just study study study and. to me studying was awesome the library. was peaceful so I would get an.

internship so I worked at the library I. could study I worked at M Omaha during. the day so I was making money over there. and and I was going to school and I was. with this woman that was well this young. woman that was just hotter in all hell. as you I mean volleball players man. squats and jumps obviously you can tell. what kind of man I am she was amazing. and uh and she turned out to be just. just a a very. wonderful person that you know social.

media you see all the all the women on. social Med she's not that she have a. social media account she doesn't believe. she's just a just a good home homegrown. Nebraskan girl nice and she took care of. me and she really did she she got me. back up on my feet she got me she just. got my the whole situation got my life. back together but she was the main focal. point on that and now two years got my. Master's Degree I actually went from. being a security guard to where I became. an insurance adjuster so when you watch.

the movie where they say yeah you'll be. happy being at home that that argument. did happen I fell asleep during the. ambassador's spee I heard so much. politicaly I I I didn't care I would. have been up half the night dude I was. up half the night I got up in the. morning like screw this do I really have. to go wrong he's like Donal get in there. and I'm sitting in the back but anyway. when the argument said yeah there that. happened he goes you'd be happy going. back home and being an insurance adest. it's because I was I still am a licensed. National flood insurance program FEMA. insurance adjuster to to this day I.

still can run claims if I want but. that's what I did I went to got that. certification and started working at M. Omaha and and eventually I got back in. the military and I remember I I I it was. hard I went through eight different. recruiters because nobody was going to. help me when they found out what I did. even though I had an honorable discharge. my rentry code was a three which is very. bad that means you you got an honorable. discharge but there's an aster there and. uh the last guy I saw it was a. Recruiting Command it was right by my.

house too I came I missed it for 2 years. I don't know what happened Lord Works. mysterious ways my friend I'm driving. home to go home I'm like well I guess. the military's done I I got my masters. but I guess the military's out of the. question I see it in the corner and I'm. how did I miss this for years it's been. right by my house and my my one room in. the house I lived and I driving there. and the Nebraska Recruiting Command. Sergeant Major is in. there I walk in he's in there I'm.

talking to the recruiter he overhears me. telling pleading my case to this. recruiter hey man you please I really. want to go in I need to finish what I. started he walks in he says I'm hearing. what you're saying he said do you really. want to go back in soon I said yes. sergeant. major he goes Roger that he signes me. the paperwork over I sign it he takes it. back from me as he's holding it he goes. there's just one stipulation you have to. do it all over again. again Roger that so I did it all over. again basic Airborne Ranger did it twice.

and went back in I and I you did all all. twice yeah yeah um if you want some bad. enough though was it it you'll do it and. it. really a lot of that you know this is. especially when you're early on it's a. mind game it's [ __ ] [ __ ] games I knew it. was coming I was in great shape cuz. that's all I did I worked I went to. school I out with my my my girlfriend at. the time who was a volleyball player. there so what did I do she was half the. time she was at the gym so I worked out.

all the time I was running 5 minute. miles you know I could I could do 120. push-ups in two minutes I mean I was you. know and I'm very lucky I had good jeans. from my family you know playing sports. helped as well so when I went in I could. outdo the drill STS but I. saw I saw how the military in those. three years went from or it was actually. four years I was from 1995 when I first. went into training till when I went back. in in the beginning of. 1999 how had it gotten easier I not do.

the drill s when I went in the first. time every drill instructor infantry. drill instructor except for one was. tabbed they at least had a ranger tab. they all come from Ria battal but they. at least had a tab or they were. mechanized and they'd seen some combat. or beener Des I mean they were hardcore. the one that didn't and he was one of my. drill sard drill sard hardney the devil. love that man big black dude 67 looked. like the demon from hell but I love him.

he he was actually the uh noic for T of. the unnown soldier if that tells you. anything about his qualifications he may. not have his tab but do you think he's. disciplined yeah standing eight hours at. yeah so uh when I went in the second. time two guys had. tabs no. cibs not that much in shape ape the only. two guys the the senior Dr instructor um.

he was from third bat so he was a. ranger he was tabbed and then our. commander our Co was tabbed and and it. was easier they weren't throwing us. around they couldn't even get in our. face they could still do the shark. attack um but it was the the standards. had lowered um the mile Max the 2-mile. Run was 1154 when I first went in it. moved down to 13 so it was easy like she. this is gake I was you know every all. the standards had lowered and uh and it.

wasn't it was it was just it was a hell. of a lot easier and of course it was a. lot easier cuz I knew what what was. coming Airborne school was easy rip was. hard like rip should be I mean it was. just it was a kick in the ass rip should. be a kick in the ass um the only thing. is though two of the instructors there I. had joined in uh in 1995 so when I came. back through they were both e6s e5s and. E one was e five one was e six and. they're like what the hell are you doing. back so I mean it would why I tell.

people that cuz it was I didn't feel the. oh [ __ ] you know the the nervous you. know like like you do when you went. through hell week or you these guys are. me it's like I know that dude I could. outrun him five years so it was then. going back to Battalion uh went there. got my tab became a team leader and then. uh my uh platoon Leader found out I had. my Master's Degree and I'd been a. battalion before and he says you need to. become an officer son and so I became an.

officer I got my commission no kiding. you you became an officer don't tell no. buddy I did not I did not know that you. would have not been invited to the. show it wasn't long lasted though. because uh I did I got my. commission um and in 2003 uh it was yeah. 2003 I was going through iobc INF. officer basic course um I actually. joined 19 Special Forces Group too so I. I stayed enlisted in the guard as I was.

getting cuz I did Green of gold I didn't. go to offer Canada school I just had to. do a year of green to gold at kraton. University so I joined the guard 19. Special Forces Group is where I linked. up with my partner that does my vodka. with me Ben Morgan from first Ranger bat. he was on Oda 993 they brought me into. Oda 9993 so we were we got to we were. friends in we grew up in Grand Junction. but that's where we really developed a. great friendship cuz he went to a. different high school we didn't really. hung out got but um anyway I still had I. got my commission and I infantry got it.

and uh at the end of the course I was. standing out there at the Malone ranges. and uh my stomach was really hurting bad. terrible was feeling awful but i' just. been out the Canon the night before. drinking you know I was like it's normal. [ __ ] we're out here sweating our balls. off just drinking ate a ton of pizza of. course I and I you know I had pass gas I. let a fart go and I shorted I chit. myself um. but it the pain actually increased when. that happened so I was like that ain't.

right and I went to drop TR and I blood. all over just I what I had blood just I. I had uh well they rushed me to Martin. my hospital and I I fig I had also. colitis or Crohn's disease and it was. really bad and I remember the the GI. doctor yeah I just had blood all over. the place I'd [ __ ] blood cuz that's what. I it when it becomes extremely inflamed. for those don't know what ulcer of. causes and all cron it's your lower. intestines and your colon become. inflamed and they just have ulcers all.

over them it looks like youve got Road. Rash it's like when. you I I've i' had it for years I just. didn't really you know I didn't really. notice it cuz it I was going at such a. high level and I think the focus was. there to finish what I started that it. it wasn't going to let anything hamper. that but it got so bad that now it was. affecting my nutrients it was affecting. my energy levels because I could that's. where you process all your food that's. where when you eat everything and when. it's all like that your food it doesn't.

process it just shoots right through you. it's blood mucus and food and that's. what was starting to happen wow yeah I. got discharged I got discharged in 2003. and that was a kicking the balls dude. that was my one one time where in my. life where God was I was mad or I was. like man I wonder if God really exist. because like holy crap I went through. all this all this and and I I remember. lying on that GR looking up at him going. really why what the hell and.

uh that's all right he he has P God. always has patience in in us he he you. know he pies us which he always he. always pies the one that needs the most. pity to was at that time was me and um. went home and I lost 30 pound I mean it. was like Ranger school all over again I. lost 30 PBS in about a week cuz I. couldn't. eat were you just like completely. devastated you were a b discharged again. yes cuz it was that wasn't the plan the. plan was I had already what did you.

think you were going to do I had no idea. I I had no idea no idea I was I I didn't. know my wife was there she was very. supportive we had actually got married. we had got married before I went to. Ranger school she that's how wonderful. she is we got married at a courthouse. and I was off to Ranger school the next. week but she was there and um what did. your wife do at the time at the time she. was actually she stayed in Omaha and she. was managing Gold's Gym so she was a. Goldy she was just working she had a. business degree and that was you know it.

fit her she's athletic Gold's Gym at the. time that was when gold was really big. so she had a good job you know so not. that you know was about 40 Grand a year. that's tough for two people to live on. can do that anymore but that time we're. okay we're living in an apartment and. all I'm all she cares we're just healing. so I'm trying to find natural remedies. to heal myself I'm going a nature store. because I'm on prazone but prazone is. rough um so through the next year all. I'm doing is first of all I'm I'm eating.

things and if it if it goes right. through me I write it down I cross I. can't eat it anymore so I'm figuring out. what I could eat my diet and then I'm. taking the medication and then I'm going. to going to Nature food stores organic. food stores you know there wasn't a. Whole Foods at the time you had to find. the little mom and pop ones and trying. to find out what could I eat to start to. build my body back up because I couldn't. take away protein I couldn't do anything. that was Dairy related and I just tried. to build my body up for the next year. and I found this GOP claustrum which.

they they don't I wish they still made. it goat milk I could do that and then I. I could eat corn stuff I could eat stuff. that was rice related I could eat. anything in the Bible if it was mana. mana. bread I could eat that for some reason. it didn't didn't disagree with me and I. built my body back up for the next year. and at the end of. 2003 I got a call on the phone from. Blackwater security Blackwater called me. first and then 30 SEC 30 minutes later. Triple Canopy called how did they get in.

I mean did you apply um at that time it. was just word of mouth and uh I remember. they got a hold because one of my Ranger. buddies at both places were already. working for him and they had recommended. my name to him interesting and uh yeah. they were they were good actually blackw. was a gentleman he and he's a great guy. Brian master was his name and he had. recommended that uh as Rangers let's. give me shot he didn't know I was sick. though either yeah but they uh they got. my phone number cuz he you know he a.

friend he had the phone number so he's. like here it is and they called me and. only reason I went Blackwater F. Blackwater is because they called me. first and at that time they were both. great organizations you had Eric run and. that it was still relatively small and. they had Lee Van Arsdale running who's a. you know Delta Legend running Triple. Canopy it was it was pretty good [ __ ]. and and uh they was it for um OG no that. time there there wasn't there was Peak. was called polar Quest was just starting. to come online but at that time it was.

brimer The Brimmer detail what year is. this 2004 end of 2003 beginning 2004 so. carai had already been going the carai. detail which a lot of your brothers were. on on that carai and they just started. to move to Iraq and they were starting. to pick up guys to go on the brimer. detail which was going to be the negaron. detail down the line it was it wasn't. State Department either it was the. Coalition provisional Authority. interesting how' you like that. the beginning it was great because it. was like o i remember showing up.

at GRS and everybody was talking about. the that was that was the good old days. that was when it was State Department. really didn't have their hand in it so. it was it was the Wild West I mean that. was you know that's where sack started. saak was he was that's where he became. really a legend over there with in the. GRS was he was one of the original. brimer guys love saaks but anyway yeah. that's that's what and I went and I went. to the first that's where I met Boon. Boon and I were in that first was called. the did you work with saxs in that not. in The Brimmer Detail no no he moved on.

he was one of the first guys to move. over to GS okay saak was the trends. Setter on on Contracting but rightfully. should be and he's he was what a great. guy man he just he is he that's the one. thing he is an operate but he's just a. nice guy I love that dude he was I. obviously I'm mentioning him so he had. an effect on my life a positive fact but. um yeah I went there and uh went through. the training which was. basically three weeks at moyak of Delta. long.

tabers white soft blue Rangers and. Marines fighting with each. other it never changed throughout your. entire Contracting career dude it was. dude it was so hilarious we didn't learn. a damn thing during that we we went. through all the shooting so you had to. pass the shooting but as far as the PSD. stuff we didn't learn a thing cuz they. were just always everybody was always. arguing tactics and then you're having. the the white was the white self the the.

you know the seal the white the vanillas. the the SEAL Teams outside of blue the M. they were the regular [ __ ] bag Navy come. on [ __ ] I believe you man I i' rather. work the vanilla guys knew infantry. stuff better than the blue guys I always. said man you guys know your infantry. [ __ ] down you guys had it mik Kane saw. bones was a guy worked quite often he he. was awesome and he hated blue it's like. [ __ ] but I he was awesome bones was a.

man and anyway they're running the. course so do you think a blue guy is. going to take [ __ ] from them or Delta. and it was I remember sitting on the. bleachers week. two and we're trying to do through we're. trying to learn basic formations walking. formations Diamond you know and then how. to react to contact whenin those. formations and it just turned into a big. argument shoving from a bunch of guys. that none of them have done personal. protection the other ones that. were been and the ones that were.

teaching that you know they'd been down. range for what six mons hey guys we're. going to go on defense now I know what's. that what's that I don't know figure it. out and teach it that's what it was so. but it was it was it was awesome cuz it. was a beautiful day you know it's it's. it's early spring in North Carolina moak. it Suns out it's starting to sit I'm in. the bleachers and one of the instructors. come over to me say it's called son with. Shrek he come over to me and he goes. what you smiling at for Ranger I said.

you guys are paying me cuz I I hadn't. made [ __ ] for a year you guys are paying. me 250 bucks a day to sit out here in. this beautiful weather get a shoot gun. and I get to watch you guys just clown. show this is awesome and I'm just I'm. just unbeliev like how how lucky am. might have be right here watching the. [ __ ] show go on and it was so awesome it. was wonderful and then you know I. finished the course I had to go home for. like 2 months cuz my clearance still. hadn't cleared yet mhm and I had got my.

clearance yet from State Department you. know that's when we start to figure out. oh the you know DOD nsac have their own. clearances oh I didn't know that I. thought you got one they all they don't. cross over so I had to wait from my. state department clearance got it went. home to my wife I said please don't. divorce me but I'm going to Iraq that's. when the Contracting life for the next. 10 years took over man that was it and. early days and it was it was the Wild. West man it was man sitting up on top of.

a building on hia street with my Ranger. buddy and pigeon [ __ ] overwatching one. of our PSD teams watching Bradley shoot. down H Street spinning the guys in their. turrets they spinning because they're. that was I still remember that was so. cool so they because they're the gun the. up Gunners they're spinning making sure. they're looking and they're not going to. get shot cuz Hyer was bad at that time. that was real bad and uh you I'm ducking. because they don't know if I'm a good gu. but I don't want to shoot me but just. that was wonderful times man driving.

down Bop driving down Irish route Irish. at 100 kilometers an hour [ __ ] making. sure that you don't get hit on that. overpass or there are not a lot of. people that say they've had a great time. running up and down Route Irish one of. the few I I loved it and I had an. awesome team we had a wonderful just an. awesome team again another one just guys. that just I all got along but it just it. worked. so for those listening that don't know. about route Irish route Irish.

is most likely. unanimously the most dangerous road in. BHD it was for a time I mean there were. other dangerous roads too like Hyer. Street was very dangerous route wild. when you got up to solder was pretty. damn dangerous and even route tan at. some points were dangerous and then of. course Route 10 when it got into radi. and fuia of course were extremely. dangerous and God bless him eliston and. and the guys you know that that that got. hung and died there um you know you know.

but Irish was always hot MH always. somebody was dying or getting hit on. Irish and I loved every minute of it and. I had the best drivers in the world and. you see when when you see a motorcade. with three cars and they know the. drivers know what they're doing and I. was very lucky enough that I moved being. from the Trunk Monkey to eventually I. became the team leader so I'm on that. rear vehicle making the calls and just. watching drivers do their thing blocking. and screening at 100K dude it is.

beautiful man and I just get chills. thinking about it because I was like man. it got to a point where it was like a. great football team where a coach didn't. need to say a thing everybody knew what. they were doing and they just did it it. was amazing having my two left and right. door Gunners cracking doors if they. needed to hit somebody they'd hit them. if they didn't they didn't you know. getting out and even when I got to to be. a door gunner on the left rear when. you're going 100K and you got to crack. that door and you're hanging out the.

side like that's almost the same as. hanging on the bench of a little bird as. it's banking in it's it's it's wonderful. man who gets to do that that was that. was fun times and we we were up and down. that thing in a two-month period at one. point we had to run it six times a. day stupid it was State Department six. times a day a day you had. to six times a day on. we were protecting the Rhino bus and we. got C for that [ __ ] and uh six times a.

day and it. was we violated every security principle. that you're supposed to have were you. guys one of the crews that had the. uh which which what I don't somebody. dressed up like a dinosaur on the the. bag of a truck and rode that D no no. that that that wasn't us as far as you. know I don't no it was it wasn't us it. wasn't us it wasn't us that was later. down the line it was a dinec team that. was later down the line yeah that was. down the line I I it was team five I.

believe it did the dinec team cuz we. would rotate with dcor on this because. we were still didn't have enough people. so we would take it then they would take. something I love the dcor guys too but. now that wasn't serious that was The. Dore team which I wish it would have. been that was that was some funny [ __ ]. that was hilarious YouTube that stuff. guys dinosaur R Irish but um yeah we. were time and place predictable we were. a big Target and we were slow everything. you didn't want to be on R Irish we were. did you guys did you guys take contact.

just sniper fire from away you know on. right when you hit route Irish you have. those that the where the uh where the. Edinburgh RIS guys got that's that. famous that I say famous that Infamous. video where those guys are on and. there's an SF guy in there that. everybody hammered because he ran and. hid in a little ditch I've not seen that. it's it was Edinburg risk where where um. it's right the beginning of when you. when you get out of the green zone you. start hitting R Irish it's still Iraqi. MH urban areas right there and it's.

about 300 meters off the road and they. would sit pkms or snipers on there and. they because there was also a building. that had been bombed and burnt out that. they would sniper fire about 100 meters. away when you're going and uh so anyway. we would take every once in a while but. we got didn't get hit with a Car Bomb we. got very lucky the DOR team that took. over for us got hit the next week um so. we would just take and you know you ping. all right well we're good everybody good.

yeah all right um it just added to the. flavor man and uh and you know it was. something to say that for the team as. well how how awesome they were and how a. good motorcade operations if you're. running it. right they're going to hit somebody. that's not doing it right and um but I. do remember that it was when we got the. task to do it and I was a TL I was like. can you guys do this well yeah you know. what am I to say no of course we can do. it but I went to the team and you should. have seen the looks man half of them.

were stoked the other half were like I'm. not going home yeah and you're trying to. keep everybody pumped up but in my head. going holy [ __ ] six times a day just the. odds yeah that we're we're going to get. hit with a VB I said we can take Small. Arms far cuz we're going to keep moving. we're going to keep pushing through just. don't stop don't create your own Kill. Zone like theis guys did they got hit. where you get caught in a traffic jam. there and then you push everybody out. right and left so you're basically you.

you you've just given them an ambush. Zone you give a big Target but we could. just keep. pushing um don't worry about the Rhino. it's got much armor on it it's the State. Department armored bus that a M1 Abrams. has it's going to be able to take a hit. just be able to medac him or get him out. of there if it goes down but just keep. moving and it was very we we just did. everything right and we got lucky you a. lot man you you you never got blown up. on IR never got blown up on Irish that.

is it's like it's a for running six. times a day time and place predictable. with a huge bus as a Target I mean it. was that is incredible it's lucky I it. is very lucky it is L because again like. I said when Diner took over the next. week team five they got hit the car bomb. hit them hit the hit the Rhino right off. hit on boom and you know I want. attribute to that hey yeah we were just. that. awesome no we were just that lucky. that's luck we were just that lucky but.

it still brought the team together it. was Wonder it was wonderful and it was. very tiring days cuz you are distressed. that [ __ ] I'm not diminishing your team. by the way by saying that it's just luck. I'm just saying no no yeah I'll tell. those zfps and [ __ ] I mean there was. well and they were and they were. starting to drop the grenades with the. little little shoots off the overpasses. as well no of course it it there is. there is some hey we did what we we did. what we had control of we planned what. we had to we ran the rout right the.

motor kit operations were great we were. doing what we need to do we kept moving. we didn't never stop let me let me say. sorry goad I get I get yelled at if I. don't talk about these acronyms so efp. for the audience an efp is uh basically. a bomb it's a platter charge it's a. force projectile yeah um I want to say I. always say I always say electrically but. that's not right I don't know why my. head say it's a platter charge they put. a piece of copper on it it's a force. projectile I always forget what the E.

stands for you guys can hammer on me. later about that but it's where it goes. and that platter that copper turns into. molten lava so it'll go through the. armor and then when it goes through it. it cools and then it. becomes it becomes a projectile hard. projectile and they were starting yeah. remember that they were starting to hit. us with that and uh and that was always. well they would even put those thermal. sensors on yeah so when they when they. sense the heat of the engine that's what. we trigger because we were able to. counter their first of all their wires.

were we could see them a lot of times. which even know you just do but we're. able to with all the counter measures we. could counter the cell phone so that was. huge yeah and um yeah I had we had a. buddy that next month guy named weeman. that got hit with they got hit with efp. when they were driving the mambas around. you blackwat had those white South. African and it went right through that. armor yeah and um you know I I always. say I love wean I love Chris he was a.

great. guy he was actually our he worked in the. mail I mean it sounds kind of of of. cliche but he worked in the mail room he. he came in and he didn't have he was on. Special Ops he worked in a Small Town. Police Department and he came in and he. wanted to get on the road and we would. never let him on the road we're like no. dude you don't qualify just this is. where you belong right here and finally. he got out on the RO Road and got hit. with an AFP and he [ __ ] him up damn.

man and but I still love him to death. but I'll be hon I think I I think I. think I don't say he wanted that because. I I would never say on anybody but I do. remember when they CU we didn't go pick. him up but the qrf team that responded. they went to to to help my team was the. PSD team and I do remember when they. came back one of the guys on the qf team. kept saying I said did you see wean he. goes yeah he goes what was you see he. said just he kept asking me to take a. picture. of. like sometimes you get what you wish for.

man man and uh again I'm not nothing. against he's he is awesome we and dude's. braver than [ __ ] is but so be careful. what you I always that's always a. reminder to me be careful what you wish. for yeah but uh yeah we did that and uh. and then um I did another year and then. I went back home and in between I was. instructing at Blackwater so I was a. farm and tactics instructor in between. contracts so I really I really never. went home even so did you move to moyak. no I stayed normal she had a great job.

so it was it was one of those things. where we were just a part A lot it was I. was gone I or I'd go home for a month. and it was hard because my son was born. my first my 19-year-old he was born uh. first two months I was over in in B my. first two months on the contract so I. did come home to see his birth and then. I went right back for another seven. months Dam and then I and um but that. was you know at that time that's that's. what I wanted there's nobody to blame it. myself man what is what is. it my whole career was pre kids and so.

when as you know today was my yeah son's. first day of school congrats on your I'm. so happy that he's just like Dad I'm out. man because I was expecting like a. little you know I'm going to miss you. Mom and Dad no he's like I don't give a. [ __ ] I'm see you guys later but. um but uh I am. I. I I missed his first open house because.

of. a I interviewed Trump Y and um otherwise. there's no way I would have missed it. you got to do what you got to do I'll. tell you man when my wife sent me. pictures of my son like with his. backpack on walking into that school I. was like you know and and it just every. time I have an experience like that I. just wonder like how the how did my. buddies do it back in the day how what.

how how do you yeah how do you rational. I want know what it's like to come home. you met your son when he was a when he. when he was born he was one month and. then you come back he's seven months. old now today that that time it was it. was just what it was it was this is what. I'm doing this is what I got to do I'm. providing for IR rationalizing cuz this. is I'm providing for my family yeah but. it's also a little ego this is what I. want to do this is what I've been this.

is what I've always wanted to do and and. you know when I got discharged from the. military my buddies were jumping into. Afghanistan so like I thought I missed. my War you know how yeah well no I got. my War this is where I need to be I'm. going and and I did have a good time I. was enjoying it it was. wonderful now looking back now and. experiencing you're getting EXP. experienced the little kid time with my. 9-year-old that I have been with him. growing up now it's now it's hurts and.

now it's like. man damn do you feel I missed I missed. him and we had to we had a coming to. Jesus when he was 16 because we didn't. know each other and even when I was home. as a contractor you don't get there's no. decompression there's no demob you're. off a plane a commercial jet and you're. going home and it takes about 30 days. just to get your head right you don't. you're not home and then you have 30. days of downtime and then you're back. out again so that's why I think it was.

even easier for me just I think maybe. that was a defense mechanism for me I. don't want to go home and be angry and. just just let me keep working that's and. I'd go back and continue to instruct at. Mo and I wouldn't go home for more than. a couple weeks or I'd fly them out to me. it was good it it at that time it wasn't. hard. because I thought we were doing it for. something bigger than you know was. patriotism they attacked us we now. looking back I'm like man gosh I missed. that I would have enjoyed being a father.

then and luckily for us him and I are. very close now I'm happy to hear that. yeah but and so we we were able to come. to terms same with my daughter too what. did that what did that mean did it come. to a head and there was a conversation. yeah yeah yeah when he was 16 what what. was that conversation we uh my wife and. I had reconciled we know we we back. together you we we it was 20 I'm sorry. not when he was 16 so it was right on. the year of 2018 where I got my [ __ ]. together and him her and I back together.

and we're out at a family dinner and or. out of olive guard in Council Bluffs iio. I remember it vividly and you know my. little guy I'm be able to be a father. with him even though I'm speaking and. I'm not I'm starting to whittle the. speaking down I'm starting to be home a. lot more um you know I'm hugging all. over him the stuff I really didn't do. with the other two because I was just so. detached when I was home it was I wanted. want to but I I didn't know how I mean. it really. was CU I wasn't always there my brain.

was sandbox Afghanistan brains half. brains there half brains family we now. my brain is all there with the. family and um my little guy did. something and I I sorry I can't say it. my my wife well you well many people. know but I just my wife it's all good um. My Little Guy peanut all my kids have. callon peanut um he does something that. the other two at Olive Garden he's doing.

something he's having starting to get. angry have a tant him because they got. those little games there at wall of. garden you can play on the little. moniters in the past when those kid when. my my other two Kiki and Bubba when they. were growing up I'd get angry just lose. it because I was back home FL the handle. I'm not getting mad at him I'm actually. being a dad I'm actually I mean I'm. being disciplined but I'm having some. patience. he he looked at me and it killed me dude. it did he looked at me goes why don't.

you get mad at him like you used to get. mad at. me and it was like whoa I mean it's. serious knife in the. chest and uh I didn't have an. answer I couldn't tell it was because of. the war it's because of Iraq I mean. that's an excuse kind of he's not going. to understand that and that was where I. realized that he was angry with me for. being gone for many years and Kiki my.

daughter same way because I was he my. little guy peanut got treated a lot. better A lot. less hand spanking on the bottoms or. whatever than the other two and that's. attributed to my mind State being coming. back cuz you know you come back and you. have that excuse. man what are you guys crying about you. see this little Iraqi kid he's on the. street you don't have nothing to eat. you're trying to compare the two you.

know but it's completely. different but that's how I am coming. back that's my rationalization I may be. yelling at you but you could have it a. lot worse and a lot of guys a lot of. fathers now are realizing that because. we're comparing their lives to these. Afghani Afghani that's walking down the. street carrying water up a 5 miles up a. hill or you know or this or the kids. that are caught in a crossfire fire. because or car bomb goes off and it. blows up a bust load of kids going to. school you know we're trying to compare.

that and they don't understand that and. that's not a fair comparison but that's. how I was until I was finally home more. and able to come to terms with what was. going on over there that that was a life. but now my life is as a father here and. my actions were completely different. with my younger son than it was with the. other two and I didn't realize it until. he said that how did you reconcile this. became a. present hug on him more love him more I.

I told him I said when he pushed away. from me give him a space but then come. back and just be hey you okay son I love. you man even now that and with the. advented cell phones that's one positive. is that I can just always I love you. Bubba and even if I get back yeah he's a. teenager he knows and you know I know we. reconciled because his junior year he. was an athlete as well when he played. basketball he played football as.

freshman and sophomore year but he had. three concussions so I pulled him out I. said no more you're done with football. play something else he loves soccer. anyway so he went to soccer he changed. his number to. 13 I like no way I went to a game and. I'm like I was you know my wife Tanya. was sitting I is. that oh [ __ ] I said his name sorry is. that thank you I said is that Bubba she. goes yeah he goes he's number 13 she. goes yeah and that's when I knew that.

he'd finally forgiven me and we are very. close now yeah I love I love that boy to. death and he is just a good kid his mom. raised I mean he is he was he's nothing. like me he doesn't drink he went to a. school he had a soccer scholarship to go. play Northwestern College there it's a. Christian School in Iowa and he's up. there and I thought it'd be all right. and he's like Dad I don't. I I don't do all the guys go to go to. sou Falls and drink and they and I he. goes I don't do that he goes I go well.

then come home and you have a track. scholarship to the small College in col. in Kansas write that coach up and tell. him you want to come in that's what he. did so he was he was wonderful man he's. just how about your daughter she's. headstrong man but now this she we're. starting to we're starting to get better. because it's it's it's the daughter's. way different little boys you know boys. you can be a little firmer girls you you. you don't really want to in my opinion.

you don't because you don't want him. falling in with a man that that bosses. them around but you also you she's still. your daughter she got a discipline so do. I do Mama handle. this but it came to a point too where. yeah and my daughter's as far as her. outspokenness is like me my oldest son. he's not you know he's very very very. quiet he's strong but he you know he. doesn't argue back he doesn't he he he. knows I got he goes I got it I'll fix it.

my daughter she's going to argue argue. argue argue and there were times where. we would be yeah we'd be yelling at each. other like cu the disrespect that was. there and uh my wife finally say I she. goes just let me let me let me handle it. and this was a couple years ago and so. done he just default to my wife who who. and my daughter responds better to her. mom and a lot of it has to do with me. being gone a lot but now we're we're no.

we're getting back again we're we're. we're we're reconciling and we're at a. point where and she's not. very I think she got she's not very um. affectionate she doesn't like the hugs. and the and the kisses like my little. guy does and my oldest son he'll let I. said I'm going to hug you till you're 40. till you're 50 years old son they like. it you I mean my son doesn't hug back. but he lets me she she doesn't like it. she doesn't and I I think a lot of that. has to do with you know her growing up.

and me and her mom you know sometimes. having some issues we got divorced at. one point and me being an angry angry. man coming back from. deployments but she knows I love her and. you know there was an issue at her. school that I love it she wrote a letter. to the school saying how she had a. problem with one of the one of the dress. code issues I'm like heck yeah and I. remember I call I said I got your back. darling cuz I believe you I said and I. know you doing the right thing and.

that's what I love because that is. something Hanto would do like selling. telling Pete hexa you're going to choke. out a former. president hey she got her opinion hell. yeah I got you and I called her and she. was she you know so it's it's a lot of. time I'll tell i l her I love you Don. yeah. Dad I love you love you too cuz I called. her I said you write what you want you. know I got your. back tell them how you feel I said I.

love you and she goes I love you to you. Dad and that was actually just last week. good for you man so it it just it's. being a father man you just have to. figure it out and there are it's okay to. be a disciplinarian there's nothing. wrong with that but you also your kids. are all different and for us that. deployed we do have to relearn we have. to change ourselves you know the. Warriors don't retire like Ron said and. I know we put in the movie but he said. that but it's the truth but we don't. ever retire but we can't be a warrior at.

home time you can be a dad and but you. have to figure out a way how to reach. your kids and and luckily for me my kids. are smarter than me so they would maybe. not tell me but they would say things. where I was aute enough to pick it up. like my son or like my daughter and they. don't always have to say they love you. just in an action like my son we number. 13. I just know right there like he he he he. he get he he forgives me he's we're good. and we have been perfect since and I'm.

happy to hear that thanks man that's. pretty Chris Let's uh let's take a quick. break when we come back we will get into. how you got into the OG contract you got. it brother. perfect fabric by Gerber Life is term. life insurance you can get done right. from your couch all online and on your. schedule you could be covered in under. 10 minutes with no Health exam required. just go to meetfabric. docomond that's meetfabric. docomond with every holiday season the.

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hillsdale.edu SRS to get started there's. no cost and it's easy to get started. that's hillsdale.edu SRS to register. hillsdale.edu. SRS all right Chris we're back from the. break yeah and uh we just went through a. small portion of your career well I. guess not a small portion move on to a. portion it's of my life small portion of. my life let's put that way but um now.

we're getting ready to get into how you. got picked up for o that was you know. again I I and I keep referring this. God's path the Lord Works mysterious. ways it really it wasn't anything I. wanted to do I was doing fine doing I. was working with Blackwater uh doing. State Department stuff but then also I. was working the Greystone which was. Eric's he was trying to make like kind. of an executive outcome sort of but it. was Greystone so it was still black. water but it was like a little offshoot. we were go on what's executive outcomes.

um that was the old South African PMC. where it was really a PMC mercenaries. where oh that was like [ __ ] yeah that. was where they were going in actually. getting hired by governments to take. down terrorist organizations or or. actually do direct action missions that. wasn't the deir [ __ ] that wasn't the. deir [ __ ] no this is this was the old. and mercenaries yes the where the term. mercenary I would say well term. mercenaries back in beginning of time.

but that was where the government. stopped in and said we got to stop doing. this because there were 60 South African. you know those guys were 60 South. African strong of former military and. they were taking out huge armies at the. behest of some of the African. governments read about them it was. pretty interesting stuff they they were. bad asses what is this called again they. were called executive outcomes how the. hell do I not know about this and also. I'm surprised too man that's that's big. deal that's I'm a dumb ass sometimes I. don't know if anybody's still alive from. any of those you know was early long 70s.

80s I think it was but anyway Greystone. was supposed to be Eric's kind of like a. offshoot of that so it was blackwat but. we were called Greystone but I didn't. know Greystone either dude I got left in. very small and it just last but it was. Eric wanted to keep that was it the. agency stuff no it was private stuff we. were going out South America and. training. local South Americans to go and protect. bases overseas so protect blackwat bases.

more so instead of using the nepes the. girka giras you know the we were trying. to all right hold on let's go let's talk. about Greystone I've had Eric on here. three separate times we have not talked. about Greystone it was I don't think it. lasted very long um it was very small it. really was more training going down. there and vetting locals that we could. use from South America Central America. so I went to Peru and El Salvador and.

then we all said teams going to Colombia. and it wasn't anything nefarious it's. not like we're going on there and. starting to execute we weren't pulling. we weren't pulling inks let's put it. that way we weren't doing that we were. we were we were going down there to. train and then working with the forza. special and helping them train a little. bit so it was like a FID mission it. really was but it I think Eric wanted to. get to a point where it was like its own. self-sustaining Army gotcha but it just.

never morphed into that because then. State you know that's when those times. is when State Department started to take. over High th the CPA now was high threat. protection then it went to that whips. worldwide personal protective and state. department getting their hands in and. that's when the microscope started going. up Eric's yeah keer where they were. trying to come after him for stuff they. and whatever I like carck I I protected. his family in between contracts I'd go. to Tyson's Corner and you know i' go run. with him in the morning cuz I was the.

only guy that he was he was a beast dude. was physically I could run with him in. the morning and i' go take his kids to. school because that code pink that. liberal terrorist crazy women group was. always threatening them so we had a team. that would help him and I was on that as. well I was the detail leader for that um. but anyway we did that and I got to go. somewhere in South America in between. contracts so I was state department and. then do you want to go Greystone you. want to go to South America hell yeah so. we went to pierra Peru went to uh San.

Salvador went to Lima Peru and it was. fun it was it was a good time again my. Spanish comes back so I don't really. feel like it's a deployment to me you. know it's and ate some good food went to. a couple spin classes there in LMA you. know Shakira on bikes in spandex she. what can't go what anyway anyway it was. a great and then it was and then the. training too you know and and um and go. working with the for de special. especially in El Salvador was pretty. cool um but then uh I came back and I.

was still teaching High threat. protection getting ready to do another. contract and uh Marty strong he SE. Lieutenant great guy uh he's written a. few books himself but great guy he was. one of the program managers on the uh. Blackwater contract that the state. department contract and Randy Leonard. was running starting to run the O side. house we call it the victory we call it. the victory program in aob army of. Blackwater program which was the static. CA guys the base Security Guys Marty.

comes to me he says hey you want to go. work OG I'm like Marty and I'm state. department and I thought the. requirements were still like eight years. or nine years spec offs I only had six. so I was like I don't qualify and it was. six but I he goes you. qualify well all right cuz I was jogging. in moak I lived out in the back at the. PTC the private training center was out. so I was jogging one day and he was. driving home and that's when he he. yelled out of his window he go you want. to go do o I was like Mar qualify and.

I'm still trying to run he goes you. qualify all right sure put my name in. the Hat and then the next day Randy came. and there was seven of us. instructors that had been working. contracts and there was the victory. program which we ran to get guys. certified for OJ it was it was easy it. wasn't anything tough to be quite honest. with you we're coming back back and I. remember you know we're get done. training we're teaching a class for the. day to send guys over on the whips. contract I was doing the high threat.

protection side of the house on that. side and he pulls all these guys and. what get these are all these are all. tough guys man all pipe hitters right. cool as everything I can do anything and. Randy comes in and TDC had gotten a name. for itself it was hard people fail a lot. of people were failing and so Randy. comes in and there's seven of us he goes. we have a slot for TDC who wants to go. it was. crickets all these Pipe Fitters manbody. look you looking somebody say something.

I was like [ __ ] it I'll go I was like. I'll do it and it was like everybody. would cuz if you one of us didn't. volunteer Randy was going to pick one. and you know if if you don't pass it. well then maybe it'll come back on whips. but you're never working it was it was. it's literally pass or fail you pass if. you fail never OG. ever again those listening OG stands for. other government agency so we weren't. calling you're getting into the. intelligence stuff they the clowns in.

action we're getting into the clowns in. action sure true but we didn't call it. GRS I didn't know what that was called I. didn't know it was GRS you know he said. OG which I knew what it was but it. wasn't called GRS at that time if it was. it wasn't that wasn't the term used. around the Head Shed there. yeah so I say and Randy says okay okay. we need to get your spun up and he. brought in Dan Simpson Dirty Dan one of. the original makers of TDC with Randy. they they I mean they started with Dan.

uh another Dan um he started J great guy. um wish remember his last name I can't. but it's probably better you don't don't. you're right even though he's Pro well. he left and started osen Hunter Group. which oh maybe different so he he's a. but I no worries. anyway he goes we need to get your spun. up and if you're a ranger and that seals. you guys use pistols SF they get good at. pistols Rangers we get a pistol we're.

throwing it in a ruck sack we don't. shoot that and we're rifling a machine. we can that's our thing rifles machine. guns gustafs that's our. thing and Randy goes get out there I. need to start training and at the time. too I wasn't using broom handles which. oh [ __ ] you know because we don't that. wasn't you guys did blue blue and and. white soft did a broom handle is a. forward grip that goes on the front of. an AR-15 that wasn't a thing High re or. M4 M4 M4 AR-15 s spr PDW whatever yeah.

you get all you gun porn people can can. call it whatever you want they figure it. out exactly but I remember and uh and I. never we never did High ready that. wasn't a thing it was low ready low. carry low carry low ready so that's. Ranger right you got to teach your high. ready so I get out there Dan the high. ready actually came Pretty Natural the. broom handle I love like man where did. why am I not been using that thing and. it was just I used the deer I like the.

deer for the forgrip the cqd forgrip it. was excellent it was perfect fit my hand. right and uh so I got the rifle stuff. down that was pretty quick the. pistol jeez a I mean I could pass the. state department qual the pistol which. is a. joke the TDC pistol was not a joke that. was like whoa how am I going to do this. I there's and we worked on that. continually for about a week and then it. was like you're gone go see you and we.

went my TDC course was held in um. Danville not Danville uh ITI that's. where it started the the racetrack the. out there ITI what what is that West. Point Maryland I don't remember it was. called ITI it's uh it's in Virginia it's. in Virginia yeah but we did it there. went there you know did the PT test easy. I mean said I'm running 5 minute miles. it's nothing I think I ran that whatever. was in 9 minutes where you had to run a. half mile carry the body run back and I.

was just I was very blessed I've been. blessed with good Aztec running jeans um. the uh rifle part I it was tough it was. challenging I me say it was easy it was. Challen no it's tough it was the time. standards they're tough um got through. that the night stuff again we use night. [ __ ] I was used to infrared lasers I was. used to I was so it was awesome to. actually not have a 14 of Cyclops on and. it wasn't the 15 were in that time they.

were 23s they were a little bit bigger. oh damn those old school those old. school ones there was real heavy but it. still was all right got used to it. because we had stronger necks back then. we were tougher back then um the vehicle. stuff was piece of it was just tactics. it was Battle drill one Alpha Man react. contract Breck contract you know it's. from Battle Dr Squad Attack Battle Dr. one alpha and then you're either Breck. contract or you flank and it was the. vehicle attacks were pretty simple it's. just bounding ultimate sex it was. infantry and house stuff no problem just.

don't flag your buddy the high ready. eliminates that which made it a lot. easier and just get on your target. think your this that's where I started. this needs to start kicking in more than. this more than the shooting it's a chest. game be three steps ahead of your enemy. if you're racing towards your gun you're. already screwed you you've screwed. yourself that's why I don't get into the. YouTube let's go fast fast cuz if you. have to go fast you [ __ ] up somewhere. and that was what was te that's what.

Randy really Dev grew Randy Seal Team. horsecock Randy call you knowers holoc. Call sight came he really harped into. that with me along with my platoon. Sergeant Randy Battalion which I didn't. really start to put together till TDC be. three steps ahead so you don't have to. react fast it's a chess game and we had. a MI5 and MI6 guys trained in there too. they were part of our vetting teams too. they were and for some reason I don't. know if this was your every MI5 MI6 guy.

met was either named Mick or Mo we had a. mick and we had a mo okay well standard. issue call sign but they were one was at. SPS guy the other one was a Roy Marine. that went to SAS and they were part of. our instructing cadr too okay and they. were those guys think that I mean it's. fine fix and then eliminate but they're. always thinking and that's the it so it. really be came where things started to. slow down you know you're adrenaline. fire breathing let's kick through that. door that's actually where I started. hey take a breath let's start to slow it.

down Ranger all right be aggressive you. need to then bring it down and it it. really it just started to all make sense. so the room clearing was actually was. great it was like man I'm getting this. I'm I'm actually becoming an operator. here you know and uh it you know it only. took 10 years but I'm there I'm getting. there and um the pistol though I was so. worried went on and did the pistol and. um you get I don't remember was it two.

tries you get you know you do practices. they have us do some practice runs. through so it's not like they put you on. there cold you're practicing um this has. changed and I I I don't because we got. we had a day of practice practice. runs of that morning and then they said. okay qu we went out and qualled I I. blowed the head all right right you get. one. Alibi and I went and I the body was fine. I was making the times I couldn't hit. the head cuz I my grip was I just didn't.

have the right grip I didn't have the. mechanics I would really because I. didn't shoot a pistol a ton um at range. Bali we just didn't do it yeah um so I. out there and I mean luckily for me. fundamentals are fundamentals are. fundamentals so I'm trying to find the. front sight trying to do whatever and do. it within that time frame which the one. that got the the one that was getting me. was the two to the body and then you. have to you know you start at the 10 and. you have to run to the two and put one. in the head so it's like go draw you run.

and you have to put two the body then. you have to run down to the five or it's. the seven and then you got to put one in. the head within like wasn't it was. stupid was like 3 seconds or something. like that I think these are different. calls than it might be different now. they might be um and I still got my. calls if you ever want me to send them. to you I've still got those calls cuz. used to teach the course after yeah I. got so I've still got those got them too. and they may I'd like to see what you. have so I mean I can always use more. training material man I love Aus but it.

was that what was getting me I could get. the body and then you had to run fast. down to the three and it was like 10 to. the three or no I'm sorry 10 yeah it was. 10 to the three I'd have to look guys. forgive me guys you guys all know I we. maybe I I'll send that we'll put online. but it was it wasn't ungodly it was. tough and I kept blowing the blowing the. head shot because you did that twice and. if you didn't get in that the the a boox. both times it didn't matter you failed.

yeah you could get every body shot in. the world but you had to hit aox not. outside yet and um basically what he's. talking about is there's a slot that we. call the credit card credit card in the. head the prefrontal cortex lobe right. the. eyes and. um but it's so if you miss if you hit. outside of the credit card you're you're. you're done it's it's on those ipick. targets the ispc I ipsc. targets and.

um the last one I got I didn't do. anything different I just got lucky as. [ __ ] body was fine physically I was fine. I was fast still still could run fast I. got there so my job was okay get there. get those bodies out you're going to hit. them cuz they're easy you know all you. do is a or b which is here or here. that's a big spot from 10 yards that's. that's not hard to do especially if. you've been shooting a lot probably. couldn't do it now but no but back then.

but and then use my speed and run as. fast as I could so I could get a stable. position and then just pre so it was run. like this and pre and I did it got it. nice and I and I got it I hit the first. one Center and I broke the line on this. break the line it counts yeah and it's. like. oh and and that was it I made it GRS and. uh went back and it was a good feeling. because you weren't looking down at guy.

but it like yeah cuz not many guys had. pass TDC we lost half the course we had. and all of them were Ranger seals um we. had one D boy and uh SF and we we had 10. guys five pass Five failed yeah and and. uh yeah I went back and uh they said. where do you want to go I said I don't. care and I they sent my first trip I. went to the secondary went to. Afghanistan went to Cabo and that was. the end of 05 beginning of 06 man I. forgot we called it the secondary the. second I remember the main in the.

secondary what. um when did you realize that the OG. contract was for. CIA um at TDC at T they told Yeah well. yeah because they would sit us down and. they would tell us afterwards or during. the course during the course during the. course we we would we would know um and. Randy Randy started the program he'd. been Agency for a while gotcha we knew I. mean he didn't have to it was hey guys.

this is OJ wink wink you know we we knew. yeah it wasn't but officially when we. got there because it was a it was a. cordon off training area it was like a. private training area where there were. no Outsiders private turning area within. a private turning area exactly so we're. at the same spot all the way in the back. yep Y and um so so that that's when I. knew and and uh what I was so cool about. is it the teams that was the the for me.

the pay was better it was it was great. it was great pay not we weren't getting. paid well before but it was still great. but the the smaller teams was cool to me. I thought that was neat being you and a. buddy and that's it yeah and you're out. there on your own and then sometimes. you're out on your own but on your own. on your own where I did a lot walking. within the cities on my own. which was awesome i' love that finally. where was your first deployment cble AR. um and I uh when I grow this out I can.

blend pretty good not that I wear Shaak. kesas but I could look like a business. you don't have to draw on the man wear. the man jammies there's a lot of. government workers out there yeah you. know just wear what they're wearing they. wear button- down shirts man and in the. winter time they were long coats and you. could buy one off at the park down by. the movie theater you know right where. the uh. not the Serena hotel that's the one that. got hit but there's that other Hotel. downtown that they had that Park and you. could just go buy stuff and I would I'd. stop and I'd buy local stuff throw it on.

yeah you know just make sure you dous. douse you can smell a little bit but it. worked and and I loved walking on my own. like and saxs he trusted me or maybe he. just thought well he's expending what I. don't know but he like Gano he's like do. you want to go for a walk and I love. doing a lot of guys didn't and I get it. man I mean when you're a white dude. tatted up down to here and you eat well. and you're always buffed out you're not. going to blend very well I get that it.

wasn't that they were afraid it's just. they didn't blend I'm a little guy I'm I. have a I have a brown complexion you. know I know how to handle myself and I. wanted to and so I got man I went to the. M Market walking it was like Indiana. Jones I got to walk in some of those. Alleyways it was I I have pictures of it. sometimes I'll post them it was it was. where I was uh acting and I was walking. um with a CI case officer we were back. there doing a Recon just seeing and I.

think honestly I think she just wanted. to go back there to see it what's cool. and this was I threw an MP5 in a. computer bag had my je Glock 19 on me I. wore just local I wore just what they. were I wore khakis and a button-down. shirt and um we went back it was by CNN. Circle was back like by the soccer field. where you go across the river and the. mty markets where the river is and then. if you come out the back the front side.

it's where that two-story mosque their. their famous mosque is well if you get. down on the market in the river there's. the river here and then you see people. walking the shoping there's a whole. other shopping Alleyways through that. and you have to find your way in there. it was so cool you just walk in and it's. like it is like the movies it's like. this tight Alleyway and you get through. it in a whole other world of shopping. opens up you've got spices you've got. fighting quailes that are about this big. you've got non everywhere and there's.

people being crazy everywhere they're. just I'm not crazy but just it's just. people shopping aghan shoing you've got. police I remember walking in one and you. do have a lot of [ __ ] and a lot of trash. piled up on us because you know the open. sewers and so forth um I remember. walking and we walk out this right left. alley and there was this police officer. with a um a blackjack beating sticks he. was beating the [ __ ] out of some Afghan. just whooping the back of his legs like.

just disciplining him and I remember. walking and we did have a local guide so. that was a that was you know that's a. plus I have a local Afghani with us so. he's with us and I said what what the. hell man he's beating the [ __ ] out and. you know first instinct as an American. is this step in I got to stop this no no. no let it it's Afghan Let It Go well. what they would do is is when they would. go shopping they'd hire guys to pull. those you see guys carrying pulling. donkey carts around that was for people. that didn't want to carry all their.

supplies back to their vehicles or their. home they'd hire these guys to put in. the donkey carts and they'd walk them. the the like kind like a little Tuk TOS. I guess. you donkey cars are a better explanation. little little little pole. wheelbarrows I said why is he kicking. the [ __ ] out of him and he goes he was. parked his donkey cart in a wrong spot. it's like there's Afghanistan stand for. you but it was it just it was fun cuz I. got to I wasn't on a military base you. know I wasn't always being a DA guy I.

was I was getting out and doing. surveillance and counter surveillance. and just getting atmospherics and that. was fun that was so cool and getting to. experience the food and hanging with the. locals a little bit and and uh it was it. was awesome that first trip and all the. trips after were awesome because after I. would do a couple of those and saaks and. the agency found I was a guy that could. they could rely on to do that I they. send me out to do a lot of stuff I'd go. out in the marcarian district and they.

said can you go take pictures of this. apartment building we think there's a. government worker that's part of the. Taliban and I go yeah sure and we set it. up so I'd have KF around great guys I. could trust like papey was one um saxs. was another you know uh Auto Marine. buddy that runs fanana defense was a gus. guy so they' be close by they'd be. orbiting the area so if I was 911 dude. I'm getting wrapped up come help me but. I could go out there and I they just let.

me and I would just walk around the. city it was fun I loved it yeah I that. was the job on GRS that I love but that. was any that was the beginning of GRS. was right there where I got the taste. and that's where the bug got me it was. it wasn't even the protection it was. that holy crap I have freedom to. actually. get to know these cities and see the. stuff that I only saw in movies and. National Geographic yeah that was.

awesome those were good times yeah yeah. those were good times for the most part. for the most part just dealing with the. then you have to come back to the to the. agency and put with the [ __ ] or or. go you know try to stay clear of the. Talib bar so somebody's getting in a. fight or drinking too much you weren't a. Talib bar guy I would went in there a. couple times but I wasn't a big drinker. no I wasn't it just it was too much. drama yeah it drama or you know some a. lot of drama lot of drama just stay away.

from there and you know a lot of women. the women that were there you know a lot. of things happened on that PO. table you said it I didn't I but it it. was too much drama it just you know just. Alpha women alpha males and females and. no I I always said I was my best person. when I was overseas because I focused on. the job I had fun gyms were good there. always was a gym I could always work out.

um I had a problem running around the. Ariana I loved running even though oh. you're getting all that crap in your. lungs well I'm getting the crap in my. lungs in the gym with the with the. little with the little uh Mini Splits. you know so um I loved it and that first. trip was all first seven eight months. was off and on to the Cobble that's. where I went kept going kept going kept. going it was fun and I had a great time. what was your favorite place to work. candore gecko gecko by far cuz all the. Ops were at night so you can sleep all.

day favorite place in Afghanistan or. favorite place favorite place for me was. gecko no [ __ ] yeah I did love it I love. Kandahar and I love I got to do a lot of. flyaways there a lot of l l hadn't spun. up yet so we were sitting up L gagar and. spin those places were still they were. thinking about setting them up so we. were doing a lot of flyaways and landing. in the middle of the night in a soccer. field running off the back of a of a hip. which I hated flying those things I felt. like I was flying in a death trap CU you.

know how slow they it's just but landing. in a soccer field the middle of night. having the local guard force can pick. you up then you'd go stay in a bombed. out. building with some ratty old blankets. and with but youd go with your can to. our security Force too so we'd always. take guys with us and I I got real close. and I was also in part I was also uh in. charge of the training so we I'd run the. training with the locals too with our. local qsf guys you know the local guys.

that worked with us so that was fun so I. you know I'd go over there and even. though there was a language barrier I'd. go in there with their CEO with their. head guy and we I drink chai and we just. sit and we try to communicate and it was. fun I I enjoyed it played soccer on that. Rocky soccer field where PT was uh I. remember PJ whenever he get I want to. say his name but he broke his ankle out. there cuz there's just rocks everywhere. you know and then we'd run up gecko you. run up them out and do pt in the morning.

and it was just it was it was awesome. and we had a great team there now the. team was that team rivaled the Benghazi. team that was one of the best teams. where everybody got along myself Curley. the to we had there Rebel he was awesome. one of the best TLS again another guy. that qualified if he was a contractor. but he became a staffer one of the good. staffers. um curlyy X Bixler Joseph who passed. away uh in a motorcycle accident you. know then following year just he got hit.

while he was driving his motorcycle too. fast and um mushroom who was a old Force. Recon Marine old Marine who doesn't like. an old old crusty Marine um great guy. and then Joe Dirt Joe's uh Joe Zar Joe. de dear but dirt Joe Dirt 10 special. forces scw guy and uh everybody just got. along it was wonderful it was just and. everybody it was one of those again. teams where you could go out and do. stuff and nobody really needed to say. anything even work together you just.

everybody just knew what everybody was. going to do yeah and you just roll out I. loved it cuz it was all at night and. going out and wrapping up guys at night. was fun I me we didn't it was hot so we. didn't get a lot of Ops it wasn't like. you guys where you guys were constantly. going and but when it was it was fun. yeah it was like and then um at that. time too is when also when and um we. lost Jeremy wise and we lost Southside. at Coast so you know so that's when the. tactics changed too or the the the uh.

the um the standards operating. procedures changed where we had to. search people that were actually coming. in they would just let him on the base. because you know if for those that don't. know um I don't think the movie is that. great but I do like that scene actually. is pretty pretty good was um zero dark. 30 where they showed what happened where. the CIA chief of Base let the double. agent on too too too far and blew up. that's that was accurate that that was.

Southside that was Jeremy doc Wyatt. didn't die he came to tripy later but he. was one of the ones that injured and. they lost that real good. targeter um but that's what we had to do. as well and I there was one I. remember there was a defining moment for. me there of how to handle cuz we would. we'd have Taliban people coming on or. we'd go grab them then we have to bring. him in and we search him again there on. a facility outside and X was Hardcore. seal he wanted to kill every I loved him.

not but he just was me dud he nicest guy. us but Taliban I don't care who you are. you do what I tell you to do you do it. now or I'm going to slam you and we. brought this Taliban guy in and we were. searching him he wouldn't let us search. him but we're out of outer facility so. it's so if anybody gets blown up it's. going to be us you know say we're. Expendable s right well he would let him. I remember and it was uh he was trying. to search him and the we had the Afghan. we had one of our interpreters there and. and I'm trying to play good cop we're.

playing a good cop bad cop I'm trying to. be the nice guy and X is grabbing him. and trying to get him to do what we're. telling him to do and he he's fighting. it he's a t he's fighting and I I go. what's going on man what why is he not. letting him search him is he hiding. something is there a bomb here cuz now. my spider senses are going up cuz I. think he's going to blow us up and uh he. go no no he's he says CU he's got his. Quran in his top pocket he's got it in. his sh kamise up here like and I always. carried my pocket Bible you know the. little green ones we get going down.

range the New Testament I had one here I. always carried it every day I pulled it. out of my pocket I said here you give. this to him and you tell him he can. touch it we're saying God I believe in. God I respect his God he respects my God. we're good to go and I said you say that. you always said you know the. interpreters I said you say that exactly. how I said it don't change it don't try. to change the words you say it just like. that and he did it in in poshu and the. Taliban guy stopped fighting he looked.

at. me and he says okay I said shook his. head I said I go so we good we cool he. goes yeah we're cool and he let me. search him and I was like man you know. what just the little diplomatic. relations but also the religious side. man God is God. I don't want to disrespect your God you. don't disrespect my God we have to. search you I said tell him and I did. tell him this we tell him we have to. search him cuz I don't want him killing.

me with a. bomb and he said it and we searched him. now X was in all his rights to throw. that guy around and believe me I wanted. to as well he's Taliban man yeah but. there's got to be more way to remedy. this is just throwing his ass around and. all of us getting scuffed up a little. bit cuz nobody Road House V Patrick sey. the great philosopher Patrick sey said. no one wins a fight and he's right.

somebody all of us are going to get. scuffed up a little bit we're going to. win because we're going to throw them. down but somebody's going to get. scratched somebody's going to get beat. somebody's going to get hurt you screw. that can let's try to do this be the. nice guy first and it worked and he gave. us good info and the case officers were. very happy with us because they didn't. get a belligerent guy trying to give. information he gave up at least that's. what they said I don't get into it but. that was Kandahar and that was how.

Kandahar was for me because it just it. it the team fit the Work Fit I enjoyed. going out at night I enjoyed that it was. very hot you know guys were getting. where you had I don't know if you talked. about but you had Bradley on Dawn lucky. you know he got massive carb on there. when you were with the team I mean that. was that was kahar yeah but then also I. love that we got a punch out all over in. theka gar Helman the Helman province in. the kahar province and we got to fly and.

yeah Doo it really felt like Cloak and. Dagger type [ __ ] it was really. cool yeah that was a good place to work. it was it. was let's move. into let's move into Libya. yeah you ready oh yeah yeah yeah yeah. let's do it. you want to skip right to it I'm good. for whatever you are brother. every I if I if it hurts then that's.

what I'm supposed to feel that's what. people need to see you lead the way and. I'll guide yeah yeah um I went to. Tripoli first my first trip wasn't in. Benghazi it was to Tripoli and um and. one of the things that I enjoyed about. GRS at the especially then is by that. time I started to stop moving I stopped. working for like the the secondary. companies I I wasn't doing contracts for. Blackwater or sock who took over the. contract or or um those were the main.

two I don't know who has them anymore um. osen Hunter had another contract where I. would do teaching with osen Hunter. that's where I got to I mean that's me. and Evan haer worked on those contracts. together great contracts but they. started a program called the direct hire. independent contractor you know that. you've worked it so those that don't. don't it's funny cuz what's the acronym. DH I we were dicks and that was a joke. we're dicks you want to be a dick sure. I'll be a dick and so they would come.

recruiting for from this from the. blackwaters and whoever else and if you. had a good record you've done a lot of. time and uh your C1 at those places. would write you a good EV Val you could. come and be a be a d be a dick and. that's what I did after Kandahar. actually uh yeah do you want to go. because it it gave us the opportunity. just just gets mundane going from the. secondary to the main to the secondary I. mean you're going to Afghanistan Iraq. when you're doing that 10 years it just. you get bored so it gave me the.

opportunity to go out to different. places and and Libya was one of them so. I was like yeah so I went to Libya went. to Tripoli it was fun again it was. another place. where you know you get from the American. government that these these dictators. and all they're just awful people in. these countries are [ __ ] hoold and I. went there like this is a [ __ ]. hole wow all right there's still the. hotels are still open man there's still. a sharid in here that's still open yeah.

this this little Resort down by the. Mediterranean is still open even though. it was a burning tank down the road I. mean it was it it it that's where I I I. I didn't ever really question foreign. policy and things like that until Libya. it's like okay I'm not really sure this. was right but who cares that's not my. job I don't it's not I'm here to do what. my job is and it was fun that's where I. met Bob I met Glenn he was there and uh.

um and it was just it was less. protection and more atmospherics it was. more surveillance counter. surveillance um and uh trying to see if. there were terrorists that were moving. into the country because of the vacuum. of power who was on our side who was not. on our side and that was fun cuz it. wasn't so much protection anymore doing. like we did in a lot in Afghanistan and. Iraq it was. more just lot more tradecraft it was it. was and and and it was a it was a lot of.

times where where you you're getting to. see things or like even getting to go. places that you wouldn't get to go in. Iraq Afghanistan I'm talking about just. nature there there's the ocean right. there you know you got lepus Magna the. old Roman coliseums that are right there. and a lot of this job took us to those. places so you're getting to work in some. historic places they're like wow I. didn't know Rome was here in in Libya. you or you're seeing you know the the.

Battle of Tripoli and you're seeing the. Marine grave sites you or and we wrote. about in 13 hours when the there was a. consulate that was attacked in Libya way. before ours and we write about in the. book and getting to go see that so it. was almost you know like a m I'm on I'm. on a job but I'm also on a historical. tour tour and it was awesome man and uh. the guys were great cuz if you were on. the on the Dick program you were.

generally you've been there for a while. so everybody even if you didn't know. hadn't worked that person maybe in an. area cuz I worked in Kurdistan as well. love that place I love suly and I love. heral and I love the hook but you would. know the guys so the guy you hear the. name oh I've heard of him oh yeah I know. he knows it so you're not getting a new. guy coming in with a chip on his. shoulder everybody. man they're chill man they're like you. they're like me I'm probably the most. wired D they're like you they're just. chill got a job to do we time do the job. flip the switch on let's go kick some.

heads in then turn the switch off and. just relax and that's how it was and the. agency there you know I I I learn I had. learned how to deal with them you know I. I I knew what I I knew what to expect. and um bub was awesome bub was always a. crossfitter he was always out working. out and so was I loved working out but. he did the CrossFit stuff I wasn't a big. crossfitter um we'd watch you know we'd. go watch movies in our downtime he was. the only guy that would watch Black. Dynamite with me I love that black.

sploitation movie and every guy hated it. there except for buck he's the only one. that would sit through it with me um but. the first trip was pretty just normal. nothing really big was happening you see. some black flags going on you you see. the terrorist Flags Al-Qaeda Flags but. you're used to that time you see them. every re worse I so what there's some. Black Flag you weren't really thinking. of it went home and then the next trip. they said you're going to Tripoli so I'm. getting ready to go to Tripoli and then.

right when I got to sud Bay Greece which. is where our stopping point was um we're. part of The 555th Fighter Wing is um. they said no we need people in Benghazi. are going to Benghazi it's like okay. tripa Benghazi so what head out there I. get there and you know you just felt it. was different. you just walk you get out banina and the. movie did an excellent job show showing. that man you just get off a plane we do. have an expediter there we always you.

know we have expediters at all these. airports but you have a guy waiting for. you a GRS guy waiting for you by himself. so because that was where we were doing. a lot of movements single person one. person movements which was even better. that was even more fun guy waiting on. himself and you get off a. plane living in air probably flying in. you know find flying that first class. flight which is love how the movie did. it just right you have a first class. ticket but on those planes there's no. first class so you just get the whole. rad to yourself so you watch the Movie.

again jack flying first class he has the. whole rad to himself that's just those. little things that they got right well. you get off the plane you go in there. they get you off and then you go to you. go to the base and it just like it. wasn't secure you know other places. there's [ __ ] going on but it's felt. somewhat secure at least there's. Big Brother's kind of watching you there. you just he did you were like R which. was fine but it just felt different and. uh there was the work was pretty the.

work was fun enjoyed it did a lot of. again a lot of tradecraft more. surveillance than any protection um I. remember towards the end though and this. is where it started to get hairy where. we're just me and Boone are there and. Boon's been at it a long time too he was. start he's been doing longer just as. long as I have and we're out on an op. and it was about three weeks before the. attack and Sarah you've had Sarah on. she's like hey we've got reports at aqi. here there's this camp and we had all on.

our Falcon View we had all the terrorist. camps marked and we were spot on we had. 10 digigit grids on each one rafala. sahat anel Sharia. aqim and she goes there's a rafala sahat. camp that they think there's aqi in. there can you guys go sit on it now boon. for those that don't know Boon's black. Mexican I grew my beard out now I always. thought he was Mexican I could never. figure out he's he's he's weird looking. I thought he was Tongan once and I. thought it was Polynesian while I was.

black and then he's like are you Mexican. but he's he's MTO but what I'm saying is. he looks he can f he can blend y so we. take our local car out we go to this. raal USA hot de Camp s says go to this. one and we sit on it for a little bit. and there's this opening within the. within the compound that their Camp is. it's it's walled but there's an opening. and we can we're see sitting there in. our vehicle and we can see through. it and um like said we do look like. locals and nobody's mon to us and this. guy walks by and the hair on the back of.

my neck stood up and I looked at Boone I. said do you see that man he goes yeah. that's aqi I like [ __ ] yeah that's. that's al man they're here and it it. looked just like we were people we were. fighting in Iraq man he. L just you you could even the Dead Eye I. mean we're it was I don't know and we. weren't super close like that but it was. just it was a you just knew it was like. that's that's aqi holy crap we rushed. back like Sarah they're here man you got. to get reports aqi is here and we got.

chewed out for. that yeah for what that was beyond our. scope of Duties we weren't supposed to. be sitting on camps Bob came and chewed. her ass out and chewed Sarah out she. goes you guys I and Sarah was pissed. she's like D I just got chewed out Bob. came and got us cuz you guys are going. Beyond you don't need to be doing that. that's not what our job is here and. being and Boon are like yes it is it's. like chief that is our job and Boon's.

pretty laidback I used Like Chief yeah. that is our job that's our. job and. uh he did Rip Sarah more than us though. because he can she's a. staffer and she was pissed she was just. and you know sah she she's a pitbull man. yeah and. um I remember that after that she said. we can't go sit on camps anymore you. just can't we're not doing I said well. what the [ __ ] are we doing here then. because it it was towards the end I'd.

already gone through the fights with all. the CIA P case officers made fun of them. you know chub their [ __ ] I been doing. that for for two months now and I was. like well what the [ __ ] are we even. doing here and. um two weeks later the attack happened. two three. weeks and. them it was like. man it almost like they they knew it and. I I I still don't understand.

why the job that we're supposed to be. doing we found a Target we verified that. Target let's action that [ __ ]. Target why we got in trouble for that. and the only one that can ever answer. that is Bob maybe RTO I never got an. answer Sarah maybe she knows but I I. don't know if she really does or not cuz. I don't think she even got an answer she. got. reprimanded but that was Benghazi it was. like it was we were and that was even. Libya even some of the state department. officers will tell you the rsos it's.

like we were fighting alqaeda in our own. offices yeah and. um and that was that was it it was it. was a lot of just doing a lot of great. work getting to be on our own a lot. singles but then when we did our jobs. we'd get reprimanded for it we took some. we got another time we got reprimanded. as well um before that happens with sah. we some BT garve guys came in the The. Listener guys and there was a hospital. there that they we were want they wanted.

and that's part of our job we'll take. them around we'll drive by the areas. that they think they can hear and if. they have or gather information suck out. text messages with their little stuff. that they do the cool stuff and and we. took them out cuz there was a hospital. that they thought Iranians were in and. so we drove by it to see if they could. find out and uh as we came back we came. in Bob was outside he was waiting on us. like we were in trouble for something. and um he's called the BT carv I saying. the staff there were staffers called him.

in they were on a plane out the next day. and I was like what happened he like he. doesn't want you going and listening and. on this hospital or and he doesn't want. you doing any of that stuff and these. guys shouldn't have done that they. weren't supposed. to I don't have an answer I why I I. don't have an answer I I still I don't. know why we're doing what we're supposed. to be doing we're getting good Intel. we're get action guys were in there he. somebody had brought them in for some. reason yeah we did what we were supposed. to do and every time we do something and.

get Headway where we could action on a. Target because we're not the action guys. you know we're the we're the collectors. we're the protectors but when we did it. would get we get it' get we get. condemned for it he would jump on our. [ __ ] and it was it was just I just like. and I did a lot of times what what the. hell are we doing here why are we even. here that I don't get it what's the deal. and um then the attack happened on on. 9/11 2012 and uh you know there were.

some precursors to that you know the the. British Ambassador had got hit by RPG we. were I didn't respond to that I was in. tripley when that happened the GRS guys. that were there at that time did respond. to it um that's when they moved out of. the country they got hammered one of. their security officers got the RPG. lodged in them um but they were out Red. Cross had been attacked once which is. news that was a big news thing and they. had also blown a hole in the consulate. once already before the attack they had. tried to breach the wall so the signs.

were already there yeah and um you know. we were always over there at the coner. they were good guys Alec was a good guy. you know they were they Dave was awesome. and they there I have nothing bad to say. about them they just were they Wen they. were overwhelmed and they were these the. state guys yeah they Alec Henderson uh. Scott Wickland who was the ambassador's. body man Dave uin were the three guys. that were mainly there. and I feel like oh they were chicken sh. CH what would you have done you got a.

massive 40-man Force running in you're. out there smoking hook could CH chilling. relaxing you don't got nothing but m4s. and you're not allowed to even carry. them because State Department of policy. says when you're on the compound and. you're not pulling work you got to keep. them in your in your Armory which was. over by the. kitchen I I don't blame him doing what. they're doing they ran to they did what. they needed to do D Scott ran towards. the ambassador to protect him that was. his job Alec ran to the talk that's. where we was supposed to go Dave ran to. get a weapon they were just overwhelmed. like that was done but that being said.

you know our conversations with them we. would constantly warn them and that's. the scene from the movie where Pablo or. me being that [ __ ] I did do. that I remember looking at their. compound we came and we did a evaluation. of their compound before the attack and. I remember looking at Scott looking at. Alec I was looking at the walls there. was a big building overhead that I. thought you could put sorry about put. sniper fire in and I remember looking at. him I said guys your walls are soft your.

guards ain't for [ __ ] you know they. local guards half your guys don't even. have guns Blue Mountain Group didn't. even carry guns I said you're snipers. Paradise I said any big element gets in. here all going to [ __ ] die and I. remember Scott's eyes. went and I did feel bad a little bit I. didn't but Ron was there he covered he's. like guys if you ever need us we'll come. get you and we they had radios we gave. them our radios we all had icons to talk. to each other and they did request more. security their RSL Eric Nordstrom in.

Libya in Tripoli did so they did try. they were just turned down they. requested 240 Bravo they requested more. armed security and it was turned down by. Patrick Kennedy and Charlene lamb. Patrick was the under secretary for. Hillary and so was Charlene she was in. charge of space security and all that. those people also get away gotf free. they should have been held accountable. as well very much accountable but um but. when the attack happened it still was a. shock to me because the. Ambassador at that time um his he did.

have a security detail attached to him. it was T Special Forces Group it was a. it was the SI team that was his security. for some reason they had been pulled off. him when he came to Benghazi I don't. know why no [ __ ] I did not know that. when you watch the movie and it says jck. team repositioning to four position that. was his team they had been pushed out. for a training mission in uh either. Croatia or Spain I can't remember. interesting yeah but I knew because a.

lot of those guys when I was in 19th. Special Forces Group a lot of those guys. from 19th I was in Colorado the when. they did act the duty time there were 10. special forces so we knew a lot of the. same people and they'd come eat with us. when I was in Tripoli because their food. at the state department facility sucked. they so they'd come and eat dinner with. us and that's why like I said that's why. in the movie when you we're talking to. bub and this the bachelor's coming and. we had that conversation like the. bachelor's coming you guys you and I was. like so who gives a [ __ ] R state. department and Bub's like dude there're.

not he's not coming with his. detail I was like where the [ __ ] is this. detail they're not with him and they. were they were hardcore pipe hitters it. was a sift team and they pulled them out. so that's why we stayed and three of us. did extend myself and Boon and Ron are. supposed to go home to weeks. earlier before the attack and we stayed. cuz we had a great team we didn't want. to mess that chemistry up you know and. some that piss some people off because. of course if Bub would if Ron would have.

went home he'd still be alive of course. but I know Ron wouldn't change it. because if he wouldn't have stayed and. we would have new players in there not. saying that we're we're awesome. tactically any better than anybody else. we just had a good team I don't think. the outcome would have been the same not. because of skill sets or anything. everybody's got great skill sets you. worked your us as well you know the deal. we all got great skill sets but it's the. that team y that and that team whether. we got along or not we.

meshed. well and uh yeah so and people oh why. did you guys make it so dramatized that. when you said during that film that. three guys were supposed to three guys. extended well because three of us did. extend myself Boon and and. ran and um you know it's it's also very. telling of how awesome Ron was and maybe. just foretold everything before the. attack we had just done and I don't OS. have said this during his I don't know. because it really sticks out with all of.

us um the day before the attack we had. just done a fullon Kaz ofac uh training. off where Rome put us through a huge. scenario of if the P if the compound. gets attacked this is what we need to do. metac wise and we had catchup we had. chit who were teaching all the CI case. officers going through a huge cerac. plant wow and it was just is that just. the most I the Lord I I love God I just. love I mean I do as much as God looks at. me and goes man that man I cannot keep.

this guy. straight isn't it it's just he did it. and I didn't want to go to me being T. like R eat [ __ ] I done enough I want to. do this [ __ ] man T get out there F fine. and um yeah it it saved lives it did it. was just it was a 24 36 hours before the. attack we went through base-wide. training medac cavac plan how do we. handle Mass Cash. masses damn yeah so that just shows you. how awesome own is so.

yeah um but the attack happened I. remember I remember we were just laying. there and me and Boon were on cure we. always had you know we always had a team. on cure standby every team would be op. then we always had guys that were on a. that's all they did all day 24 set 24. hours. we were on that fure so end of the day. we're thinking Qui a day my gosh almost. time to go home you I got a few more. days left. extension I even remember um we were.

watching two of the greatest movies ever. made I just watched Battleship and I was. watching Wrath of the. Titans and um we get a call on the radio. and you can hear the gunfire but it's. not really CU there's always gunfire I. thought maybe somebody's having a. wedding or something again hear the. and um we get a call on the radio and it. from our our team leader Jus he goes Jus. need he's in the team room and it was. about that monotone not a lot of. excitement at least I didn't think it.

was I didn't hear the excitement so Boon. did roll over me and he's like dude he's. like what the [ __ ] did you do now to he. thought I pissed somebody off again and. I like dude I ain't done anything I've. been a saint all day dude I swear I just. want to go man cuz nine times out of 10. if we got called I I did something I. either put I had a placard from the. movie Tropic Thunder where Sergeant. Cyrus the Rober down junor character I. had actually wasn't a plered it was a. piece of paper and I laminated it and it.

said never go full [ __ ] and if a CI. case officer did something stupid I'd. put it on their desk so they'd see it in. the morning I do stuff like that I just. love picking I love picking on them they. the Jason. bornes so the Jason B so so um Boon Boon. and that Boon's been with me for 10. years I mean we hadn't worked together. Contin but we've been at different spots. for 10 years from State Department on to. OG so he knows me he's like dude what. the hell did you do now you son of like. I nothing bud I've been good I promise.

you and then the then the urgency came. it was about 30 seconds later though it. a jurus we need you in the team room now. and it was and you just know you you've. been doing this long enough I've been. doing this long enough all right it's. time to go and I look at Boone and we're. getting our gear cuz cuz we kept some of. our gear in our lockers but our our. quick ready gear our body armor and our. m4s our short our peashooters we kept. right by our bed on qrf so it was right. there raders were right there of course.

all the night vision all the heavy. weapons were still in our Lockers in the. team room we start getting our [ __ ] on. and do smiling I'm smiling it's awesome. I'm smiling just like this I still. remember I still remember looking at him. he's smil I'm smiling I go man we can do. something fun tonight and we headed out. our door and as soon as you got out the. door our door from we were in building. Charlie where it opened up the annex was. directly there at 12:00 so as we open. the door you know we're seeing the. tracers it's you can see the firefight.

it's going off damn so now all that. popping you know now it's starting to oh. that's what it is you know the brain is. starting to realize oh this is just some. some crazy night in Libya this is holy. [ __ ] Conant getting attacked and the. Jason bornes the ones I saw were like it. was like cast light and firecraft at. them they're just going everywhere and I. saw a team I saw ran we all had tasks. you know we had responsibilities my. responsibility was Heavy weapon Mark 46. get that and then I was going to drive.

the SUV boom's responsibility was to get. the keys for it get it out my. responsibility was to make sure we had. it ready to go and actually we all had. our different tasks and it was beautiful. dude it was just. beautiful I saw leader leaders acting. like leaders and it wasn't The Barking. orders it wasn't the yelling at each. other it's everybody shut the [ __ ] up. and did their jobs and it. was it was. awesome because even in that elements.

there you you don't always get that. you're always going to have maybe one. guy that thinks he's in charge and. everybody respected enough each other. and trusted each other enough that. nobody needed to say a word and it was. it was like Mozart it's just wow. wonderful and that's what it reminded me. I mean I I was like seeing notes man and. um we're 5 minutes we're ready to go 5. minutes it's time to go and I remember I. looked at Ron he's got the sedan he's.

got Jack and Tig in that Boon's Boon. Boon's Boon's a rock star he's got our. [ __ ] together the SUV is ready to go I. got my 46 you know we're geared up we. got our night vision on that we got all. the stuff that's in our lockers got the. ammo um Rong goes like this I look at. him that's all I need he's good you I'm. good Che here our team leader here. they're on their cell phones I go Chief. ready to. go he didn't bother even look at me I. said Chief we're ready to go he looks.

the team leader still isn't looking at. me on his phone talking to somebody I. don't know who it was still to this. day he says to the team leader tell. these guys they need to. wait like that. [ __ ] fine and the same word I'm. just what the team leader looks at me he. starts to tell me that I go dude I I got. it I [ __ ] got it I walk back to my. car R's like Dude tell them what's. what's happening what's going on man I.

said Bob tell us we got to wait now the. movie where Jack and ran got stopped and. we tried to get to him in the beginning. that happened but it was at night so we. had already been through that. before so we're like [ __ ] he ain't going. to let us go again so that wasn't part. of movie Magic just the only thing we. changed it to was nighttime when that. happened and ran did Bluff his way out. of it it was and he just had a CIA chief. of support lady with him when that. happened it's pretty awesome but we'.

already been through that where he would. not let us. go but we're waiting you know we're. we're we're still thinking at that point. in time maybe he still does know. something we don't maybe the SI team is. on its way maybe they're sending a a. bird in maybe something's coming in. maybe there's Marines the coast and. they're you know we don't we're trying. to play the benefit of the. doubt by not C creating more drama cuz. more yelling and screaming is not going. to do any good it's not and that's why.

that team was so awesome is we all knew. that if we had all been younger with. piss and vinegar we probably would have. been fighting with him and what would. that have done nothing so we're waiting. we're continually going scenarios at. least I am through my head I know the. team is you know you're War gaming. you're whing through your head you're. going through your head going going. through scenarios that you win to keep. the adrenaline in check so I'm going. through my head I'm going okay if we get. hit with mortars here what am I going to. do how do we win this fight fine we get. out the gate we get ambushed on this.

road what do I do how do we win that. fight so you're you're just it's it's. what you do in the corporate world too. when so you don't like this you're just. going through scenarios that you win and. you and the only way you can do that is. through hard training or experience or. both and by that time I'd been through a. lot of hard training and a lot of. experience so I was able to pull from. that. and I know the other guys were doing the. same thing CU nobody was panicking. everybody was Ron's taking the lead he's. our charge he's going to take care of. this and we trusted that so Ron's.

talking to to to the chief tig's there. too tig's talking to the Chief and then. time just going by the fighting is. intensifying and then instead of just. hearing AKA and PKM far and you know. what this s we start hearing. a like holy [ __ ] D I said dish holy [ __ ]. we got to go and uh can't do it we're. still waiting and that's when I saw TIG. and Bob arguing that's when the F the. the one huge interaction we didn't put.

in the movie it wasn't going to have a. place in the movie it didn't need to um. but they were arguing it's in the book. um where and that's where TIG was told B. tig's like [ __ ] we gotta go we. gotta go we got to go now now and uh. that's what Bob told Stand Down you guys. got to stand out he told T and Tyrone in. Jack's car right there now I don't think. it was malicious I don't think it was. nefarious I think he just was [ __ ]. down his. leg the later was nefarious with the.

military not coming that was po purely. political nefarious actions from the. power that be commander-in Chief and. Secretary of State and all them but that. I could be wrong but regardless we were. told to stand. down and um so we're told to wait once. Stand Down 15 minutes later and then at. the 25 minute Mark of us waiting there. cuz remember the state department guys. have our freaks have our icon freaks. they're calling us on the radios and.

that was heartbreaking man that really. was cuz we're listening to them and. they're like GRS where are you GRS where. the [ __ ] are you we need you GRS they're. we've been overrun GRS they're lighting. the buildings on fire we're hearing all. this and we're like guys right is the is. the chief of Base here in this he's it's. all on the talk cuz they're open mics. what's I mean so he's hearing this and. he's still not letting you go what was. the relationship like him before this. night uh we didn't get along I he was.

condescending as hell I didn't get along. with him I didn't like him I didn't care. for him we worked in mzo together as. well didn't like him there um I thought. we made him pretty well I think that was. the combination of characters uh we we. had a team leader and we had the chief. chief was very what's this guy doing now. he became he got assist so he got his he. got his his top tier to retire as assist. assist level and then he became a uh. contract instructor at the farm now I. don't know if he's still doing that are.

you [ __ ] kidding me they took that. [ __ ] clown yep and put him at the. farm to train all the upcoming now he. may not be doing that he's made enough I. mean CIS level retirement what a [ __ ]. joke no so he's he's what a [ __ ] joke. take that guy and put him in charge of. the [ __ ] upand cominging case. officers wow and that's why that [ __ ]. agency doesn't do [ __ ] anymore a [ __ ]. show it's a clown. show what a you know but he's probably.

retired now living in Williamsburg or. somewhere in ice with a Thousand Acre I. mean he's made plenty of money he got. the CIA you know he got the highest. level the CIA what do you think he. thinks about every day I don't think. they give a [ __ ] dude they can sleep. well at night I hope he doesn't. but it's like asking me you know does. Camala Harris sleep well at night you. know she sleeps like a b because they. think they're right all the time he was.

I'm right you're. wrong I know where I'm getting ahead of. myself but you know we're we we he. seriously was going to stay there to. collect Intel when we were leaving out. when after the mortars hit after the. bombs hit after Ron and Bub died. we had to force his ass out of the. compound because he still was going to. stay there and collect. Intel and that's that was him they're.

they are so Elite they are the they're. elst and they just think they're the. smartest people in the room and that's. one of the reasons why I always would. [ __ ] with them because they're not and. here's this knucklehead ha seed from. Kansas giving you [ __ ] cuz you think. you're the smart first person in the. room but that was him and. uh when we heard. Alec and he's in the talk so he's. watching his team basically get. decimated they're lighting the buildings.

on fire he's watching all on the CCTV. cameras he says Jirus if you don't get. her all gonna [ __ ] die just it wasn't. movie Magic that's what he said Tyrone. went like he to's awesome he's in the. sedan he an armored vehicle can't roll. the windows down so he cracks the door. and he just does this. I was like wow that is I still get. chills thinking about it because you. know T he was big arms were like that. and uh he looked he had a beard like. leonitis he had dyed it black so he.

looked like Leon should gave him sh I. was like you're trying to look like. leonitis aren't you like. yeah but I remember thinking to myself. when I saw that I was like man I go to. combat with leonitis this is [ __ ]. awesome and I gave him a thumbs up and. we started to head out the gate now we. didn't quite make it out the gate. because and I I you know I like I said. our war gaming we're still going through. our heads it's a chess game stay three. steps ahead don't rush you don't if. you're racing your gun you failed. somewhere we need something I don't know.

what we need then I realize it I said we. we need we need a mall I'm not going to. tell you his real name but The. Interpreter we got to get him all now. dude he looked pretty good in the movie. like young guy kind of young 40s in. shape he did dude he didn't look like. that he was he looked like Bob newart. seriously he looked like an Egyptian Bob. newart he was adorable glasses droopy. cheeks old dude. bald we need him though we don't have.

combat turs so I'm calling him I'm. trying to find him you have faith I'm. going to find him I say stop the cars we. get I get out of the car I'm thinking I. have to run around this damn base to try. to find this guy and Lord Works. mysterious ways brother I get out I come. with the front of my hood think I'm. going have to run to his who and then. run to the skip to find him and he's. walking right in front of my car man. thank you I said we need you man and it. was awesome it was cuz he he did he he. got an argument not an argument he's was.

just [ __ ] his pants cuz he doesn't. want to go Bob Bob newart doesn't go to. combat man it doesn't happen and his. eyes are huge and I said dude uh we need. you man we we need you I don't speak. Arabic well enough NE none of us do we. don't want blue blue on green you know. what that is but for your listeners that. don't a friendly fire in with a foreign. Force because of a language barrier blue. and green and uh I said dude we need you. man and he goes tan I'm not a I'm not a. combat trip I said I know that brother.

he goes I'm not weapons qualified I said. I know that and I had a clock 19 on my. hip I handed it to him I said you're. I'll go get your. stuff it was freaking aw he took it and. he ran back in the building C and. initially I thought I lost my weapon. Boon did too Boon Boon was looking at me. shaking his head when he ran away but he. came back out and he ran back out and it. was awesome cuz it was he was he he. didn't have the cool Gucci gear like we. do you know the form fitting [ __ ]. looking cool he had to borrow somebody's. helmet it was way too big for him so it. was all jingling on his head I mean it.

could even been out backwards so it just. didn't fit him he didn't have body armor. he had a flat jacket CU that's all he. could find he's got his finger in the. trigger well as he's running towards me. he's flagging this [ __ ] out of me and. all I could do was Marvel at it that. whole time I just marvel like this is. freaking aw this little dude that looks. like a little turtle is running towards. me right now flagging the [ __ ] out of me. with this. gun and I have never felt more motivated. in my life because this dude had no.

business going he's not a seal he's not. a marine he's not a ranger he's not. security he's not law enfor he's a. little interpreter that he is giving of. himself and he's coming with us and I'm. like that is what heroism is that's. bravery yeah selfish service that's it. man and he got in the car I did take his. finger out of the trigger well I said. put again because I didn't want to shoot. me in the backs he had to go behind me. and then we took off and we headed. started to head down there that was our.

Trek towards the consulate and then it. just got even hairer from there from. there um but we get there we stopped on. a road called gunfighter it was called. gunfighter it wasn't moving magic that's. what we called it we had a gunfighter. here and Adidas was the other road on. the other side and there was little. there they were look like they were. shooting back now it looks like in the. movie we get up and it's creeping up. they actually were already in a. firefight they're already shooting back. and forth um we didn't know who friend.

or fo is but they weren't shooting at us. so we get out of the car Rome parked. Jack parked TIG parked we parked behind. him and we started to move in position. to engage and you get close to that wall. and you start hearing those cracks just. crack CRA crack cra cra because you know. bullets are going by your head breaking. the sound you're hearing a every once in. a while and then there was a a block. center block wall behind us so you'd. hear a smack from around 762 hitting the. hitting the wall and it was freaking it. was all you know it's [ __ ]. awesome it's awesome and I saw Ron start.

to engage nobody said a word everybody. just started to engage and we started to. move and Tig got us T got our 203 you. know our one 203 cracked the breach put. that H DP round and that high explosive. du purpose round he just started started. throwing rounds down range and but Moon. came up to me and said uh as we're. shooting he goes you know we knew there. was a building off in the distance that. we thought we could get up there and put. machine gun fire sniper fire and so he. goes Tano Let's get high man let's get. high so Roger that so he went and got.

his sr25 I went and grabbed the 46 so I. had my M4 M 46 M4 covered I was wearing. shorts it Bo that's who are you wearing. shorts yeah I was actually they were. just a grer version of the they were a. tan version of these they were shorts i'. made a canar from old truspec pants um I. was also wearing a Mickey Mouse shirt. but we couldn't put that in the movie. because uh I guess Disney didn't like. Mickey Mouse shirt Terrace but I had a. Mickey Mouse um probably the closest. thing he could get was a was the was the.

panda shirt but it was a Mickey Mouse. shirt um but yeah we uh and we just. started climbing walls man and it was. hard I I wasn't ready I wasn't no spring. chicken anymore 8 foot high block walls. with all that gear. on the 200 a 200 round drum on sack on. the uh 100 rounds on the 46 you know. magazines all over me magazines all in. my pocket and just sucked it up and he. just and you know I tell you what the. the First wall we climbed over I was.

just getting ready to get shot in the. butter the head so I I I did I looked. over didn't see anything and then I went. butt first so I figured well I get shot. in the butt I can still probably fight. if I get shot in the head I'm [ __ ]. out but I'll be quite honest the third. fourth wall I didn't care anymore just. so smoked get me over this wall and we. it's only 400 m we're 400 m from The. Compound at that. point Jack Tyrone and Tig went down and. fought their way down and suppressed the.

weapons just like the movie did they. went down the main Alleyway to the front. gate and they suppressed cuz TIG had. that 203 and he's just knocking him back. um and we had some local help. PKM guy with a PKM and some AK-47 guys. and but half them didn't know what the. hell they were doing anyway but at least. it was it was gunfire Boon and I did. have two locals that we took with us. they did the movie two guys came to me. before we jumped that first wall and. said hey mister can we go with you and I. looked at him and they they were kids. and I first I just felt like I could.

trust them I go 17 Feb they said yeah I. said come on and Boon's like what the. [ __ ] are you doing I said dud I said. force a fire team man and I said I'll. stay in the front you just stay in the. back if they well then you kill them so. and they went with us that whole time. and we jumped walls got on that building. and it was it was that disheartening if. you again Watch the movie it's pretty. spoton we cleared that building and you. know you know how is clearing buildings. going upstairs and I got that gear and. I'm clearing it with a 46 and I'm smoked. and we get to the top of that building.

you know Boone's got his M4 but he's. also got an sr25 on him so he's smoked. too and we get up there and we look down. and we couldn't see anything it was like. man all this energy you wasted. cuz the consulate there are trees that. surround the consulate well there they. were all on fire so you you just. couldn't see anything in there and it's. like God man because you're trying not. to get pessimistic but like you know how. many calories I just was how much water.

just doing all this and for nothing put. out of your head and what snapped me out. of it too is Ron came across the radio. cuz he's still moving CU he needs our he. he needs us to suppress at least that's. what he thinks anyway he's doing a damn. good job on his own that all three of. those guys he goes T I need your eyes. man I need your eyes go uh I go run this. Roost is a bus man I said shoot move and. communicate I'll meet you in the middle. and that's what we did and we ran down. the stairs and went to the back gate and. just like the movie we just climbed over.

the back. gate what was awesome is there was a. commander that pulled up just like that. Moon he pulled up with his vehicle and I. actually wanted him before we jumped. over the gate he got the before we. jumped over the back gate I wanted him. to push it open with his car so it's. like push this open with this car he. goes wait Mr wait and he got on his. phone and he started dialing a phone. number and I was like who the [ __ ] are. you calling man he's like just wait wait. I go Who you calling he goes I'm calling. the bad guys I'm negotiating surrender I. said who the [ __ ] I said you doing the.

what said. [ __ ]. and Boon's yelling at me because he's. already inside he climbed over the gate. already and tig's yelling at me to get. inside on the radio he's like we need. you Tano quit [ __ ]. around and I just let it to go and he. was one of the guys that was going to. facilitate the Counterattack later but I. didn't know and so that little argument. you see me get in with that wasn't that. that actually did happen that happened.

as well and I got in there and uh we. fought we we pushed him off it's a 9. acre compound and for the next hour we. just were trying to find the Ambassador. running in the Burling building trying. to locate all the state department guys. cuz they were spaced out everywhere why. biting off the B guys pushing him off. we're really that initial when we got on. there I think they were so shocked it. was Americans and luckily we have that. still that ER of er of uh intimidation. Americans are coming we got to go they.

wasn't much of a gunfight coming up on. we were got in there Americans here we. got our night vision on even though I'm. wearing shorts I still look pretty. Terminator is with all the gear. on and uh they ran away and um we found. Alec you got him out of the skiff. Dave was Dave did awesome Dave was. already out he was already trying to. find the Ambassador he was already over. at the consulate trying to find the. Ambassador um and uh then we just took. turned running in that burning building.

trying to find it and it was tough we. almost lost ran ran went in the most. Jack and Ron went in the most TIG was. probably close to it U me and Bo pulled. a lot of security and then we take our. turns we spell people but I I tell you. what I would and I I admire thank all. you firefighters out there I admire the. hell at you I'd rather get shot at again. than ever ever running into a burning. building filled with diesel smoke ever. again I remember going in and trying to. go in the first time and I tried to run. in and the doors are wide open and you. can see and it's open there's fire you. know alive on the ceilings and there's.

it's just smoke. everywhere and um I hit I ran in the and. it's almost like I hit an invisible wall. I just that is hot as [ __ ] it was so I. feel like my eyeballs are going to melt. it's like you really have to just I just. had to go suck it up don't it's going to. hurt just go and it was awful and you. know your body gets used to it a little. bit but it was so hot it's like running. into a pizza oven filled with diesel. damn and Ron did that I mean that's how.

badass Ron and Jac are they went in. there multiple times I went in there. like twice because they just kept going. in and it was hard to find we did lose. Ron almost when where he got caught way. back in the back and we had to play. Marco Polo with him to get it out we had. like ran we're here Jack kept yelling. from ran this way ran ran ran cuz he got. stuck and he almost lost his way CU he. got disoriented from but that just shows. how badass and Tig as well you know. tig's lungs are apparently [ __ ] so. Jack's screwed um eventually Scott got.

out you know and I I have no quals. against Scott nothing at all people why. he left the Ambassador well what the. hell would you have done dude seriously. you're you're dying of fire in the heat. I I can tell you test from the heat that. was Unreal what would you have done man. really okay. but he got himself out and uh that's. when started to go to hell again cuz. that's when they started to. Counterattack and uh I do remember. before that they did find Sean's body um.

Dave uin tan Jack managed to pull him. out of a window and um the movie I wish. they would have put this in the movie. more so than what they did they did a. little bit of it but it was pretty. remarkable it was one of the most. defining moments to me of human spirit. and sacrifice that I'd ever seen in my. life because Sean was out and I see him. pull Jack pulls him out Dave's pulling. him out uh uben TIG is and Scott's on.

some stairs and he's sitting there and. he just keeps rocking back and forth and. he keeps saying he was just with me he. was just with me he was just with me and. I see cha chck for some reason he starts. to do chest compressions and CPR on a. dead body jack knows he's dead then D's. dead Sean's dead it's obvious he's blue. he's dead and I couldn't figure it out. like I'm sitting there watching this. whole thing unfold from about from me to. probably that death there about that. far and I want to say something but. before I get the word out it hits me.

because I'm looking at Jack and every. time he does a chest compression he. looks up at Scott and he goes we're. still in this fight man he is being. positive over a dead body to get Scott. out of his shock so we don't have. another casualty he's just it's unbeliev. it's just like I'm sitting there just. marveling it. going wow these [ __ ] dudes are. awesome I love this I love Jack I and I. still love Jack but it just to me it. just defined selfless service again and.

you know people think selfless service. is giving yourself giving up your life. well essentially he did because that. he's doing CH press on a dead body to. get some guy back up on his feet to back. in the fight who thinks like that yeah. obviously he did and it was awesome and. another motivating thing just another. reason why Benghazi was the greatest. sign in my life one of them say but it. was. defining we get it Scott comes out of. his shock cuz you know big Tyrone like. Superman I don't know where he came from.

it's like he flew out of the bushes but. I I know he's R in the building but he. just and you I see Tyrone come out of. nowhere and he just puts his arms around. Scott and he goes man we are still on. this fight we need you and you just see. Scott come right back and it was like. wow this is awesome I love these guys. that's why Ron is so that's why he he. was Superman to. us but uh we loow Scott's body on TIG. and Jack and Dave uin did they put him. in the back of our SUV that our team. leader and The Interpreter drove up.

after we cleared it said it was. clear our team leader yeah he waited. till he cleared it then they drove up um. I don't blame The Interpreter for doing. that but come on tal but anyway we go. back to P in security and then was was. the TL like was he even he was was. former Secret Service no military I know. who he is yeah yeah I know who I was. going to say you know who he is what I'm. asking is was. he.

scared I know he was scared I know who. he. is I'm trying to figure out how to ask. this question the right way hey I wait I. I got I got to get a drink of water take. your time I guess what I'm trying to ask. was did you guys even keep him informed. was he even what really part of the team. or did you have you totally. just he had just just like any blue he. had his he had you know he had his uses.

you know he he could he would give us. get int cuz he was you know he was a. blue badge so but as far you know just. everyday activities he had the runs. control the runs you know and but really. me I let Ron handle that I stayed I mean. it's just a liais on it really was. that's what he wasas and that night he. was with us and no we didn't pay. attention it wasn't were we were. allowing him to pull cover we were. allely 99% of the staffers in GRS. they're just liaison they're not.

operators they're just. like they aren't just. goison go leison give us the Intel and. that's kind of what he was that we don't. even really know what you do. here qualified to be here you do here. still favorite movies I can't [ __ ]. stand them I'm I'm just I can't stand. them it's probably something I'll never. get over the amount of worthless. [ __ ] that were in charge of me and you. and all these other like.

Stellar performers and then you get. these chumps when you don't hold people. to the standards that everybody else is. upheld to that high level standards what. do you think you're going to get and I. we're we're we're diving off a little. bit but I'm going to say it look at the. secet service protect Trump yeah yeah. that is what you got with GRS Ts for. them unless they were former spec offs. guys that were contractors that I think. they were always just supposed to be. Liaisons though and then at some point.

in time they like inserted themselves to. be some [ __ ] leader and it's. like back to your desk go get your. [ __ ] pen or your pencil and get the. [ __ ] out of my way my face. and that was him but you can't say that. cuz they'll fire you but you can still. you say it anyways you still I did and. then you get fired well I I I I I did I. I got I got. told after uh after I fell asleep I had.

an argument with Bob and then the TL. called me in and we had an argument we. were like he's like T I know who you are. I saved his ass from getting his ass. beat by a bunch of seals when his first. trip went to Coast why did you do that. cuz I felt sorry for him it was his. first trip I didn't I didn't be Hest I. did I didn't know him I'm like he's the. first trip I'm trying to be that guy. that's your first trip let me tell you. how it is bud all right don't go in. there like you're knowing everything. you're working with a bunch of top-notch.

dudes go in there shut your mouth and. [ __ ] you listen yeah but he didn't. it' been you know that was 2006 now it's. 2012 so he's got years six years now. he's salty but um real experience it. showed too it didn't it show it is yeah. it was funny cuz when we did our Deb too. they did ask about him they said what'. you think of the TL I said he did a. great job I because he stayed the [ __ ]. out of the way oh man the Head Shed at L. the GS they didn't want to hear that but. that's what I said Boon started laughing.

it was during our AR when we got back to. after Benghazi you said that I said D to. the it's me dude I don't give it what. are you going to do fire fire me then if. you haven't fired me yet you're not. going to fire me but the argument I had. with him where in Libya after I got. dressed down by Bob which I just like. eat [ __ ] D I've been through enough this. pump and Circumstance crap enough Rah R. politics in progress million [ __ ]. times I I don't have to stay awake. through this [ __ ] it's the same [ __ ]. well he pulled me and he goes I'm gonna.

write I got written up you know we get I. got R up wrote up I didn't get written. up and they wrote me up and he goes I'm. going to write you up for this because. you fell asleep you're being. disrespectful and I remember I said to. him cuz I saw GRS kind of go into more. like a state department button down. I saw it and I said we're going more. State Department aren't we button down. need guys to say yes sir no nobody talks. back no [ __ ] guys that cuss every. once in a while you know you don't need. guys like me anymore do you I guess guys.

like me are Dinosaurs Aren't They and he. said yeah pretty much I sign my thing I. W when we got home I sent him an email I. said good thing you have dinosaurs like. me huh that night and I didn't get a. response back from I still got the email. my a I had AOL what in my shows you how. old I am but he said that and I said you. looks like guys like me or dinosaur. sorry when did he try to write you up he. wrote me up right after I got ripped. right after I fell asleep before the. Ambassador it was right before it was.

before the attack so when I fell asleep. and the Bob Bob dressed me down where we. got in that. argument he says well I'll write you up. well I did get written up we didn't put. in the movie cuz how boring is that. seeing some guy are getting now but I. went back to my room you mean people. want to watch a a [ __ ] pencil Pusher. right up write up a real man I'm going. to write you up cuz I'm not a real man. I'm just a [ __ ] so I got I got written.

up I got call me an hour later he called. me in and I I I got written up like I. don't give a [ __ ] fine it's like getting. a you a ticket that you got 100 million. parking ticket pay your parking tickets. y'all but you know what I'm saying and I. threw it like whatever it's probably. what he was doing before. this actually he was a for those that. you know him but he wasn't a he wasn't a. he was in Fort chick forgery and that. was his in the che forger it was in that. division The Secret store they do. forging money laundering so whatever.

anyway but uh they drove up yeah he's. and that night it was it we just if if. we need you buddy just stay in the rear. man if you want to add your gun to the. fight fine just keep just make sure. there's no ammo in it just dude just. stay away from but he didn't Fire's gun. that night and he stayed hidden he. stayed protected and we didn't really. worry about it cuz we knew he wasn't. getting the fight it wasn't going to. happen so that's why we put we put um we. put um I don't want to say his real name. almost did so why we put Amal with him.

but eventually Amal even saw what was. going on and a maul got attached to Jack. Maul kept following Jack around when. Jack wasn't running in the burning. buildings so um we go back and we hav. found the Ambassador and and uh I. remember on the back side of the villa. here cuz we're pulling security cuz that. back gate was left open I told that. [ __ ] Commander close the back gate. when you bring your guys through before. I really knew who he was I thought he. was friendly he left it wide. open and I'm like that [ __ ]. forgot to close the back gate I said.

guys this jackass didn't close the back. gate I said get ready cuz I knew it was. going to I me he just no it's like [ __ ]. dude and I'm kicking myself for not. going back there and closing it as well. and trust and right I knew I shouldn't. have and then all of a sudden I I take a. knee and I hear a big explosion goes off. so I'm here explosion blows off this way. on the baron Villa and because the angle. so lucky again thank you because the. angle shrapnel's this way but I do catch. the over pressure because I'm not more.

than you know 20 feet away from the. explosion so knocks me catch the over. pressure but the force that goes this. way I didn't hear the initial boom so I. didn't think it was an RPG I mean you. know unless you're from a very far. distance RPGs don't go you see vapor. trails and they go it's not like that um. unless you know it's a way distance and. then you might see it later after it. hits you'll see maybe a little puff of. smoke or something but you always hear. Boom because that's the propellant that.

makes it go it doesn't there's a boom. and uh as I go back to pull security get. back up on my feet because I'm thinking. some guy runs in front of me and he's. missing his hand he's holding his wrist. so I go his profile and I go up and his. hand's missing he's holding his WR like. trying to stem the bleeding it's just. mangled and then his buddy comes out. runs from behind him and he's holding. pieces of his butt and it's no farther. than me and you I'm like right here. following him and I go what the [ __ ]. what happened I don't even know speak. English but that's all I can get out of.

my head cuz I'm a little I'm a little. rattled brain's knocked a little bit I'm. seeing this dude running by with no hand. he's just bleeding everywhere I'm seeing. his buddy chase him it's holding pieces. of his hand so I'm looking at him and. I'm in my head going dude you forgot. your hand go back get and that's what. I'm going through my head and know like. I say what happened I didn't say that. all I could get out was what happened. guy goes grenade the guy holding pieces. goes grenade so I'm thinking oh you're a. [ __ ] idiot next time when you cook a.

grenade off I'm thinking this in my head. you hold it for two seconds instead of. three before you throw it and I'm. thinking of my dad West Texas from from. LEC Texas his voice comes in my head and. all I hear is rub some dirt on it you'll. be all right kid and. as I come back to pull security because. they're not a threat I do hear a boom. from a distance like [ __ ] I know that's. an RPG I go post. security and I just go like this because.

I know I'm dead if it's anywhere near on. this side I'm dead uh there's nothing I. can do there's no cover I can get down. and roll but by that time I hear that. boom from that distance where it's only. 100 not even more than I would say 75 M. away if that I I'm dead so I'm just. hoping I hear the second boom CU if I do. I know I'm alive and I do I hear it boom. blows up this one actually is closer and. I catch building I catch the the the.

concrete knocks me down on the middle of. the road again because of that angle and. I know that's what saved me it was the. shr mill most that went that direction. or got embedded in the. wall and um the movie showed me getting. up and having a wall for cover I didn't. I got knocked in the middle of that road. that was shotgun from the front gate to. the back gate and all that came in my. head was ranger. battalion what's your cover Ranger.

bullets what do you do when somebody's. shooting at you you shoot back and I. took a knee on that road and I just. started. shooting and I shot and I shot and I. shot and I was thinking to the guys from. riado cuz we get hammered P you know got. a great history you know urgent Fury. just cause Somalia you know we shoot mhm. [ __ ] you guys we're [ __ ] you coming. out you're going to catch a bullet in a. tooth and that's all I'm thinking and. I'm just putting rounds and I remember.

Boone he told me later he says I was. watching you and all I could think of. was you're a [ __ ] idiot don't take. cover and um I've never felt the hand of. God before I've never felt it again I. fit that night and I know I do really. believe we all get one. one one hand of God moment where they he. steps in and protection I did I like. he's looking down at me and I say this. during my speeches too because I. honestly believe this I think my. guardian Angel's like on this chair.

God's up here on this year my guardian. angel and God are looking at this idiot. getting shot at because there's the. world's opened up there's just crack cra. cra cra crack it's all going around me. and my guardian angel is looking at God. going see what you tasked me with God. you T with this [ __ ] idiot that. doesn't have half a brain and uh and. God's like pity God pity is the one that. needs to be pied and he says I got you. and I F the golden cocoon come on top of. me and that's not I I I'm not saying.

that at any reasons that's what I felt. you actually felt it in that moment it. was a golden egg that's what I remember. golden egg I got you just warm just was. it was it like a intuitive feeling it. was a physical feeling no it was phys it. was pH warm gold I got you and I guess. intuitive too it's just safe I was like. I'm I'm good and I kept shooting and. then uh did it give you confidence yeah. I wasn't I got this nobody's going to. give me I'm you felt it before you.

started shooting or in the middle of in. the middle of it no when I was Sho were. you there in that position there about 5. seconds before I felt that and I'd. already went i' was already hammering. away cuzz you know there that was a g it. was really easy I'm just I'm just. nobody's coming through there it was. yeah about 5 Seconds hey I mean 5 to 10. it was wow it was awesome though and. then uh I am taking your KN I'm not I'm. not getting in the prone says I'm just I. feel fine I'm I guys's got me my right.

ear drum blows out I remember that and I. look and there was a Libyan that had. taken a knee right next to me his AK-47. was shooting with me right next to my. head and that was amazing cuz I was. thinking to myself ain't this the. damnest thing God just gave me a little. liian angel and put him right there next. to me cuz he had a button- down shirt. slacks on like he got off work and he's. sitting there with his AK-47 shooting. with me I never saw him again either. that night I don't know where he went. and then boom I'm running and Boone.

comes and boom takes a knee right on the. other side of the road and he starts. shooting with me and then T gets his gun. into the mix on the top of the roof and. it was awesome dude it was just freaking. awesome now we moved a little bit after. that we started to move back to vehicles. and started to kind of peel out because. uh we had get out of there but that. moment there for me was and I I I I I. always tell people that and I I said. guys I'm not saying hand of God there. all time I again I've never felt it. after I didn't felt it before but I felt.

it that night so when people say Do you. believe in God I say no I know there's. God and he took pity on somebody like me. that's a probably broken every command. well not probably has broken every. Commandment that we're supposed to keep. oh it was there I felt it and a [ __ ]. fine you don't believe me I don't care I. don't think it's [ __ ] and I know and. and it was amazing again I wish I could. but it's a golden egg it was like a like. a willy WKA golden egg warm protected.

nothing's going to get you I got you and. we fought him off and we appealed out. and it was hard to leave because we did. have a drone overhead watching. everything the ISR come on. station and Ron's like guys we got to go. we get they're they're massing they're. going to attack the annex we got to get. get out of him like Ron we ain't found. the Ambassador yet he's like I know but. we got to go you got to make a decision. leaders always make decisions even if. they're hard decision it sticks with me. because you know our Credo dude part of. the Fist hands of the rang of creed is. you never leave a fallen comat to fall.

in the hands of the enemy every unit has. that same not in those words the same. thing you leave no man behind and we did. because we had to get back to the annex. and it wasn't the wrong decision we. would have lost 24 if we hadn't gotten. back but it still bothers the [ __ ] out. of. me because we left him we left him now. we didn't know he was there that's still. no excuse we still could have kept. trying to find him but he he had gotten. so far back in that Safe Haven area that.

we just couldn't get back there and when. the fire died down and the fighting. moved back to our Annex the locals. pulled him out he was dead of smoke. inhilation there's been talk that he was. mutilated and all that I didn't see it. and I inspected his body when they. brought him to the Airfield I you. inspect at his body I looked at it I. didn't no I didn't pull his drawers down. you know I didn't do that I mean they. may they did cut his genitals off I I'm. not going I'm sorry I'm just guys I'm. not going to do that to me I looked at. it because what I'm thinking again. ranger battalion what am I thinking.

Randy shart Gary Gordon dragging his. body through the streets so of course. I'm going to look I'm going to see if. he's scuffed up I'm going to see if his. face is scuffed up I'm going to see if. he is cut in places I can see but he's. was clothed and I didn't see any marks. on his face I just saw lifeless eyes and. he had still he still had like dies you. know smoke from the diesel all over so. what I saw I didn't see I didn't see. mutilation but am I 100% sure no because. I didn't pull his pants down and for.

those that want wanted me to do that. they can go [ __ ] themselves don't do. that no I'll leave that I mean if I was. an autopsy G sure but not in that. situation no and that's I and I wasn't. thinking mutilation I was thinking. dragging through the streets too yeah um. but we left them but I I I I I stand by. the decision and all of us still do and. as you know leaders you're been a leader. you know you make hard decisions you. have to and sometimes those hard. decisions even if they're the right ones.

are going to stick with you for the rest. of your life and that's one that. does and uh but it was the right. decision and we got back to our. Annex um we had Sea's body in the back. of the vehicle so that was a little. surreal because we all piled into one. vehicle so we had. Tyrone we had TIG uh we had Tyrone we. had yeah TIG we had myself we had The. Interpreter we had the TL and Jack was. sitting on the top of Sean's body.

driving back in the SUV and they trailed. us you know they were following us we. could it was easy to pick up and we're. like and I wish they would have put this. the movie it's in the book but I wish. they would have put this in there I. actually was making the calls back I was. like guys I was telling the gate Gates. Get get the gate Ready's like get the. gate ready and they said what's your. status you know you always say we're. coming in red we're coming in black. we're coming in yellow but and I said or. we're coming in hot we're coming in cold. and I don't know I was just trying to. make somebody laugh I said guys we're. coming in lukewarm it was stupid but.

it's like I'm just trying to get people. to laugh because we've been through a. lot at that. point we come in the gate and um the. state department guys where they tried. to get out of there you know where we we. got them out the ones that were still. they they did go the wrong direction. they went towards. Adidas two houses down was where anel. Sharia had a safe house the consulate. was right next to the terrorist Safe. House State Department knew it we told. them a million times we had taken.

pictures of it there's a scene in the. movie where you see us driving by and. I'm taking a picture of those [ __ ]. and they're flipping me off that's that. happened they didn't do a damn thing. about it so when they went out the gate. Jack kept telling them and you hear it. on the radio too and that was during the. that's where the confusion happen cuz. when we were getting attacked and I was. shooting that's when we were trying to. get them out of there it was during all. that chaos that Jack I heard on the. radio cuz I'm I'm got a piece in and I. hear Jack saying guys you're going the. wrong way you're going the wrong way cuz.

we said go to gunfire when you go out. the gate do not go to Adidas you go left. you do not go right they went right and. they got crushed and so when we pulled. in the armor held they managed to get. back on run Flats to our place that car. was just on fire just flamed. everywhere and I thought they all dead. but none of them died the armor held. Scott did a great job pushing through so. to Dave getting through they just went. through a gauntlet of gunfire and RPG. fire and got chased until they got back.

to our compound so that wasn't movie. Magic at all they got hammered and it it. just was in the chaos he just went the. wrong direction and luckily for them and. again I I cudos a lot to Dave Dave uin. did an awesome job but I wouldn't in. that vehicle but if I was to guess I. would say they all kept their heads. pretty good but Dave probably did the. one I was like get the [ __ ] we go push. through push through push through you. know but we got back it's on. fire we get we get refitted with.

whatever we need as far as ammo um T did. did drop our grenade launcher that was a. movie Magic he actually dropped it he. didn't it was a 69 hk69 he hadn't. rechanged the the normal lanyard that's. on it youever we get that the lanyard. that comes with it sucks cuz it just. slides through we usually cut it and we. put 550 cord on it or something that. sticks and he didn't so when he was. running it fell off and it fell on the. ground and um but it was weird and I I. don't have an answer for you I wish I. did but we had a second one as well and.

for some reason I was looking for it and. I couldn't find it I don't know what. happened to it I ran around for five. minutes before I went up on my rooftop. looking for that other grenade launcher. cuz tig's like dude I'm sorry I dropped. it it's like son of a [ __ ] TIG and I I. ran around you know and you know how we. are we stage it where it needs to be. it's in the team room it's in one of the. gun lockers that's where it needs to be. I didn't take it with me because I had a. 46 and and he had the 69 and we didn't. put it in the curf vehicle so I ran I.

couldn't find it and I thought well. maybe Boone did put it in in our vehicle. so I ran and looked in the vehicle I. could not find it it disappeared to this. day I have no idea what happened at 69. and I'm thinking why on Earth would. would Bob when I'm thinking malicious. but like what would that have done so I. don't know so I couldn't find another 69. and we had two but I couldn't find it um. and uh grab more ammo ran up to building. first we went up to building a vantage. point was terrible and then we jumped up. to Building C where we could see over.

Zombie Land and this sheep slaughter. house so we had our compounds building. here building here building here. building here front gate here Zombie. Land parking lot where they were massing. family's houses right there that they. were using to come through through. before they got into zombie land is. covered cuz they knew we weren't going. to shoot the kids cuz there were kids in. there so we weren't going to shoot the. buildings and then the Sheep slaughter. house the Sheep L was over here so we. got up there a was not a good vantage.

point so me and Boon moved over to c. azen tiger in a little fighting position. right here overlooking Zombie Land and. they just start moving on us and you're. just seeing it through the night vision. and it was like kids playing. hide-and-seek man so e they're just I. don't think they thought we had night we. had night vision or they didn't think it. was that good cuz they were just running. from Bush to Bush and Rona was awesome. and I you know I I talked about Nick and. Paul The Raven 23 guys that was heavy on. our minds at that time because they had. gone to prison for defending themselves. yeah so we weren't going to shoot we're.

like Ron man I don't see guns but. they're moving on us man they're moving. the drones even overhead feeding us. Intel you got asymmetric movement you. know stuff's coming um Ron's like do not. [ __ ] shoot you see a gun first then. I'll give the command to shoot and he. goes because I don't want to go to. prison and he was referencing three guys. so that was on our head so we just let. him get they just kept coming and coming.

and they got closer and closer and then. finally Boon goes I got. AKs and they were probably about 25. meters from oza's position when he saw. that and then this Fizz comes over the. back gate right when he says that and it. was a gelatina bomb and I saw it cuz. gelatina bombs is like a stick of. dynamite they light a wick so you can. see their night vision it comes over the. back gate and it goes over to hes and. takes position and I'm like man this is. going to miss him man it's going to miss. him this is good news and then this. figure comes out of nowhere and this.

bombs come this way and take as got out. of position to go get water what are the. [ __ ] odds man I mean the odds are. just like winning the lottery he's here. the bomb's coming I'm just watching in. slow motion and it just blows up and all. I see is the white light coming in the. world opens up you know that was the. that was the that was the indicator to. start the attack and they just started. shooting and we [ __ ] destroyed them I. mean we were we had our sectors of fire. down we had our our um we had all the.

Avenues of approach locked down we knew. the Dead Space I mean I wish I would. have had that 203 we would have killed a. lot more of them but we just crushed. them and everybody was so disciplined. sector sector we stayed within our. sectors we trusted each other on their. sectors and it was interlocking sectors. of fire and it was like coming it was. like coming into a freaking wood Chopper. and we just everybody did awesome well. it only took about 5 minutes really it's. about as long as it was and a lot of you. guys been in fire unless you've been in.

Afghanistan at a base where they just. keep hammering you most firefights are. only about that long they're going to. and um it's like a boxing mess you know. you're real quick and then there's some. dead time unless they's just a massive. massive force or you get stuck and they. got the advantage but they're losing ass. they're going to break contact get back. and figure out something and they. did well when that ended I looked and. I'm thinking I'm going to go get T let's. go pick up T cuz I figured he was dead. how many uh I mean did you guys have any. estimate in your in your head yeah yeah.

how many do you think that I think and I. think the major I mean it's it's it was. hard but I think we got attacked by. maybe over that whole course of imp. period not at one time 200 300 people. two to 300 people but not it you know it. was like that initial one was probably. 40 40 guys fought them off and then. there's another 40 so it could have been. the same guys we didn't kill 40 I wish. we were that good you you know and we're. good at what we do but come let's be. realistic but you know and then at the. anic at the consulate yeah easily 4050.

that we got countered I mean it was 4050. at a pop um and yeah we were killing. them I mean I we we shoot him and that's. that's the that's the you know a lot of. US unless it's within a lot of us that. have been in man and I'm not saying in a. Bravado thing or a ego thing it's just. how it is at a distance 5.56 if you hit. somebody sometimes it doesn't keep them. down yeah if close you're in it's going. to if it's me to you and I hit you yeah. you're going down you're not getting. back up but at 50 75 100 met you might.

but generally they're going to be able. to get back up and they they'll probably. bleed out or throw out of the fight. depending on where you hit them I mean. or but that was where it could have been. you know how many guy I would we have. estimates I've seen estimates of. Wikipedia like a thousand no 200 300. over the whole night and who knows some. of those could have been attackers the. same attackers um we.

killed I don't know I've got reports. again I've seen reports a th. no I think we killed I I know I I think. 100 200 I think we did Oz had our had um. had contact at the B at at the hospital. there and you know o and I still talk we. get along or not we still talk every. once in a while and I remember when we. got back I asked him I said you your. contact cuz now you know we're Americans. we like to keep score right and I said. dude did you ever get a word how many we.

got man how many we killed and he goes I. didn't ever get a number but he the my. contact at the hospital said that they. just kept bringing bodies and injured in. all night so I was like well that's good. enough for me I mean after that it. didn't matter because it was nice seeing. them turn tail and run that's even more. and uh but yeah we fought him off and. the reason TIG didn't die the gelatina. bomb hit him and it landed right by his. feet and blew up it's just cuz he's so. big it would have stopped my heart you. know it's just a big it's just a huge. flashbang it's used for fishing it's for.

dropping in the Mediterranean blowing. and fish come up you know it's it's. Mediterranean redneck fishing and uh but. it [ __ ] him up he still has problems. shoulder goes numb his back's out of. whack but he got up and that's a. testament to how tough he is he got up. and he got back in the fight and he. actually got hit. around we round hit his armor it was a. piece of round it hit it hit the metal. post and Shear either the post or some. come and hit him and knocked him down. and he got up and kept fighting and uh.

yeah he's a tough son [ __ ] he a tough. redneck takes good good people man yeah. and um but that was it was awesome and. it would gave us a wave of confidence it. did it's like okay we got this we we our. we our battle plan our Force protection. plan our sectors of fire the they're on. right let's keep doing what we're doing. and throughout that time. frame you know we're still thinking. Americans are going to help we're still. thinking that the isrs is seeing. everything and we're thinking somebody's.

coming cavalry's coming but they weren't. but at that point in time we still had. some faith that they were because they. normally did everywhere else I was at. Cavalry came whether it was another GRS. team whether it was a scorpion team and. NSA you know the GRS equivalent at the. NSA whether it was. military um somebody was Brits somebody. was coming and. um between that 2hour lull of 1:00 a.m.

to 3:00 a.m. where the next attack. happened that's where we started to come. to realization nobody's. com and um and the reason is cuz we had. a uh we didn't put him in the movie um. but we had a old Vietnam veteran that. manned our radios our 117 he was a. staffer with the agency great guy RTO in. Vietnam wonderful guy he still cries. every time we see him because he.

apologizes for not getting us help um we. already had cure of elements on station. you know it was you know we had a 911. call we could call cuz that's what we do. JS that's what our jobs is is to. coordinate with the other units so if we. need people we can just hit a button go. on 10 Alpha comment on 17 on the 117s. and say we need help and we have 117. and every so often throughout the next. couple hours Boone would come to me and. say hey we got to hold the Delta man.

they're on our way on their way and. little did we know they had were coming. but they got diverted to I it's. Croatia um 555th Fighter Wing that was. our big we we always thought we had them. they had two Jets at sud Bay gree sud. Bay gree is 5 minutes with afterburners. to Libya and then they had the 555th. fighter ring the whole unit up in Aviano. it's a qf base that's what's they're for. we figured they were coming Boon's like. no they're not. coming the Fast Company Marines there.

was one in Spain and there was one in. the med near sigonella and we thought. they were coming they he'd keep coming. back to me every after he' tell me. somebody was coming he'd come back and. say no they're not we're we're not. getting words there's no confirmation. they're coming. um and then that cth the the. ambassador's old the ambassador's. primary security team the paner and. extremist force that had been um. increation and got repositioned to the. staging. area that was when I really knew nobody.

was coming CU When he said not they're. they they're not on their way anymore. either he came hey hey that SI team the. commander team's coming you guys. actually went through this entire. checklist that's his job and that's our. job and yes we went down the line every. that's why politicians and that's why. the CIA pisses me off that's our job. they know that politicians may not know. that but the agency knows that that's. what our main response as GRS we're. protective services and it's also to. protect our asses if something happens.

to get the assets needed that we assets. that are in the area to us if we need. them so we had them all we knew them all. it was I I was in charge of that when I. was there but it's always you know every. time it's passed down to some so it's. always refined and improved and inine. and reproved so it it was the RTO the. Vietnam RTO that was that was his job. and he was very good at and he and he. was very supportive of. us and um the reason um he cries when he.

sees us now I remember and I remember I. saw him in Texas when I was doing lot of. speaking back in 2016 and I got pissed. at him we were out did a speaking event. there in Fort Worth and his wife's. wonderful lady they came now a drink. with me and uh I think TIG was there as. well and. um I got pissed I got. drunk and he hadn't said anything as far. as testimony yet and he can blow the. doors off all the help that was around.

there he could verify what we saw and. I'm like qu being a [ __ ] [ __ ] dude. stop go tell him what. happened and he got up and I saw I felt. bad he got up I saw. tears in his eyes and he walked away his. wife sitting there his wife's Texas s. hard as Nails I go ma'am I'm sorry she. goes no I've been telling him the same. thing to tell and I said well why hasn't. he he goes because they're going to pull. his pant you in if he does where he.

don't get his retirement and I I was. like okay I I never say anything about. it again I love the guy I love. him and he has a lot of info out there. but I do respect people in their family. and if that's not for my selfish reasons. or anything else I understand that I. never bugged him about it again um and I. never will again CU I I respect that I. do is it right no I don't think it's. right but I still respect his decision. and he did try he did try his ass off.

well 3:00 a.m. we get hit. again and um it was like the movie show. we just it was just they did the same. tactics and we just crushed them it's. like waves hit and retaining wall. man and it was a it it was very very. satisfying but it was man how long is. this going to keep up because we had a. ton of M4 ammo tons but we're eventually.

going to run out we're eventually going. to get tired we're eventually they're. eventually going to get figured out and. hit us with a Car Bomb I was so shocked. they hadn't hit us with a Car Bomb yet. cuz that was when Iraq or Afghanistan. that's probably what they would have. just done Dr a car and blow up the wall. but they hadn't so I was really shocked. at that. but you know you think about your family. a little bit and before that second. attack I had thought about my family and. I just remembered the phone call and I. just remembered it briefly and I I. thought about them and I just remembered.

did the last thing they heard for me did. I tell them I loved them and I did so I. was okay didn't think about the rest of. the night those the last words and my. daughter my son and my wife know that I. love them before I got off the phone. yeah I told him I left it out of my head. and rest t night. and by 3:00. a.m. you're starting to get and what I. was doing at that point in time having. some. self-reflection getting motivated that. they are going to breach the walls. probably eventually and then I'm I got.

to get it in my head that we may need to. start it's going to get close quarter. and we're going to maybe start stabbing. it's going to start knifing and that's a. totally different animal than shooting. it's intimate and that's a my if you're. used to that there's something wrong. with you ment my opinion me shooting I. understand I've done that it's it's kind. of impersonal and because the way we're. trained it's almost like you can imagine. targets and also they're terrorists who. gives a [ __ ] but when they're up and you. got a. stab that's different at least to Me. Maybe not to others but it is and I you.

I got to get my mind right if that's. going to happen so I'm starting to get. the mind set of hand to hand you know so. I respect those guys from World War II. and World War I F trench fighting wow. it's like God those those guys are bad I. ain't [ __ ] those guys are badass but um. and a ton of rats you know from Vietnam. but. uh we get word bubs coming in and um I. didn't know this for for several years.

but bub actually ponied up money from. his own bank account to rent that all. Executives jet I don't know if he was. ever paid back are you kidding I found. that out actually I found it out from. his his best friend Sean who runs bubs. Naturals B he came on my podcast and I. had no idea that I didn't know that wow. but that tells you how bub is yeah. ponied up money I'm sure he was I think. I think what Sean said is the seal. Foundation came in and actually. reimburse I don't the see I ever paid. him which [ __ ] them anyway but anyway.

that's buob man that's bub his own money. and they rented Executives jet it was it. was like a G6 was it was nice it it did. have flight attendant on there serious. no [ __ ] flight T cuz they were waiting. for us when we got to Bina and. um but he gets there and they got there. actually at midnight and they just it. took them so long to coordinate to get. the 10 km our place by the time they got. to our place it was about 5:00.

a.m. and um they get there and I. remember them coming in and I remember I. was being my smart ass self I'm I was. saying hey [ __ ] welcome to the party. [ __ ] better late than never man. you bring me something to drink and I. remember Bob BB walked by and the TL. that was with him he was a former BW guy. that went to the dark side because he. started sleeping with a case officer. married her though it wasn't bad he. married her but he would become a. Stafford but they both went they walked. by me and they did like [ __ ] Tano and.

they both flipped me on they I was. giving them [ __ ] and um they went back. all them all the GRS guys aside from bub. went in a building C there were two. Delta guys that were worked with us in. Tripoli uh they went in a building C2. and Bub was the only one that came up to. build I mean building uh building yeah. Building C yeah the the the headquarters. building and then bub went on top of. building C so like I said keep in mind. here I'm on building a building C's uh. I'm sorry building a here Building.

C here B they're in B I'm sorry that's a. headquarter building building B and then. building a or building uh I'm getting. confused here A B C D sorry a they went. in Building C D here Jack's here Boon. still up here I went on the front gate. building which is. a. and I need to take a. crap couldn't get wa relieved me and uh. bo said go take a [ __ ] so I Sky down you.

body function still happen when all this. you you know that they don't stop. scurried down the stairs took my [ __ ]. got back up and. uh all sudden a and it didn't sound like. a mortar it didn't and I don't know my. hearing had been sh shot out you I had. to ear piece in one ear but I didn't. we're hearing protection in the other so. and Boon been shooting sr25 by my ear. all night and I'm shooting either my M4. 46 so my hearing's gone and I went did. you guys hear that it sounded like. somebody's it's you know what it sounded.

like when we used to hear the the 107s. come in in Iraq that's what it sounded. like I thought it was a. rocket I said you guys hear that and. then I don't know something in me said. Mor I go mortars mortars and so said. take cover the first one hit and hit on. the back side of building SE and that's. when the World opened up again and I. remember ran he just spun he spun and he. went sicklick on that other 46 and he's. just over where the Sheep Slaughter us. say they're trying to come through there.

now like idiots they're walking their. their troops into where the mortars are. coming fine with me they can take out. their own guys if they want but ran is. just so I'm seeing this laser beam. because it's not daylight the movie it. shows this daylight is actually was a a. before morning nautical twilight so it's. you know it's right when the sun's may. but the night vision you still need your. night. vision um so I'm watching all this I'm. seeing one guy turn and start to shoot. that direction I'm seeing another guy. turn which was Oz the next guy was bub.

then the next guy was Dave uin and of. course I want to get my gun in the fight. but I can't see the targets because. they're here I'm here the targets. they're coming from this direction Morts. are coming from this way so I'm shooting. over their. heads at put a couple rounds down and I. look and I think you know we kind of. already went through this before but I. look behind me to make sure there's. nobody coming from my six cuz I still. got areas of responsibility nobody's. there I turn off h a couple more shots. and I see the next one hit and this one. hits on Building C hits right by the. parit wall boom blows up as my night.

vision goes white and it comes back. those four guys that were shooting are. now three so it's like it was it's like. you know close your eyes you see four. open your eyes there's. three Dave's hit Dave got hit with so 81. it sheared half his leg off it sheared. half his arm off they were on but they. were just hanging by tendons and and. he's screaming and he I like how did you. hear that I don't know how I heard it. but I heard him screaming I'm here he's. yelling he's screaming I hear all I. could hear. it I'm still shooting they're still.

shooting I turn around to make sure. nobody's coming again because I still. got my six we still got to fight we got. to finish it you can't quit they got to. take care of Dave I'm not run off my. position and help him somebody I'm just. expecting Maybe the Delta guys or. somebody to come up in help but who I. don't know we got a fight to go I put. three rounds over the top of their head. I went boom boom boom and as soon as I. did that three three mortars fire for. effect boom boom. boom and when they did that my night.

vision went completely. white because the overabundance of light. and as it came. back they were gone and I saw the pixie. dust I saw the charg particles cuz any. of those explosions if it's fine. particles or dust and and there's not a. lot of wind and there wasn't and there's. a lot you can see the particles coming. down because they get charged or heated. so I'm watching the pixie dust come down. and it it really did look like they got. turned to dust my brain's like cuz.

they're gone all a sudden they're gone. and there's a cloud of. dust I'm like man I we can't beat this. we don't have any air support I put my. head down said. 4 and God and I know it was God it was. God on my. mom and he said get your gun up. Ranger I kept fighting and Jack kept. fighting and buo kept fighting and we. fought those guys off that were coming. for us Bo and Jack permer they had. better Avenue fields of fire than I did.

but and they did awesome but um the. mortar. stopped and at the time I was like wow. wonder why they stopped I mean they hit. with the building they wanted to hit it. was far for effect they had that thing. locked in that's our main building. that's skiff that's where all of our. troops are that's where all of our. equipment is that's where all of our all. of our comms are is that building they. knew which building to hit unlike David. Petraeus who needs his R Ranger tab pull. that said well it must have been a truck. and they just ran a truck and they just. rap haphazardly put a Mt tube in the.

back of a TR come on man come on man. what's up infantry officer I got respect. for petres but when he said that I'm. like dude. come. anyway the reason they stopped. the movie I wish they would have edited. it a little bit better you see the. militia take off before the mortars came. they actually took off after that first. sh when I heard that sh they must have. heard.

it they I don't know they must have. known what it was more than me which. then my hering had gone to [ __ ] they. took off and then that first one hit. they went to take the mortar team out. for us their Commander had actually come. in with our team and he was in Building. C when those mortars were hidden so. there that first one there they. scattered because that's their tactics. they knew something was coming a mortar. was coming in so they're moving their. vehicles so they're not part of the.

Carnage and then I could hear in the. Distance Tire screeching gunfire then. the direction where the Moors were. coming from and they went and took the. morar team out for us because their. Commander had got caught in building sea. when the attack happened. Lord Works mysterious ways brother yeah. no and um the ironic thing is to is the. mortar team that whole militia belonged. they were former Omar Gaddafi. commanders.

wow we got saved you know we got saved. byar. KFI so yeah so for anybody to think that. we went in there to overthrow Gaddafi. that's [ __ ] we went in there to. destabilize a region so the Muslim. Brotherhood could come in and stabilize. it under that foreign policy under the. Obama Administration and we needed. Gaddafi's weapons to go and give to the. friendly militias as McCain would say. but anyway they saved us and mor stopped.

and then at 700 a.m. you know a militia. was coming in and I remember there were. just me and Boone and Jack left nobody. and it would piss me nobody would come. and relieve us it was like dude I was. like. guys G us guys Delta will somebody come. give us a break I mean come on it's like. having a patrol base and you know you. got to give guys breaks nobody would. come Rel us so we stayed up there and I. remember Bob said t Delta guys didn't. come up no and I'm I got no heartache.

with I I did for a get big time what. were they doing I don't. know I that's a good question I have no. idea um and they're Delta I know they do. hardcore [ __ ] and I got no heartache. with them and I'm not trying to throw. them in the us here it's just it is what. it is and I know they're they're [ __ ]. Warriors because they're Delta you you. kind of have to be to be at the unit now. I've seen guys bolo shoots at from the. unit too going through. TDC and and going but like anybody they.

have bad days but they I I just I don't. know maybe they're on a different I I I. would like to know if you ever get them. on I would love to know what the hell. they were. doing maybe it was document destruction. destroying classified documents of why. we were there I don't know I mean that's. what we put in the movie Michael Bay. actually has a pretty. good he has a pretty good he has his own. peeps within the agency that feed him. [ __ ] in DOD because they love him. because he makes them look really good. which he should he's honoring he loves.

veterans so maybe that's maybe he put. that in there because that's what they. were doing I don't know and but all I. know is they couldn't they wouldn't. relieve us cuz I kept calling for him. then I kept making fun like hey uh D. boys you think you could come reli us I. got to get a drink of water you know I. was just on the the open mic so. everybody could hear it so I was being. my normal jackass pissed off so. anyway when the militia was coming. in Bob says to me he goes T you got the.

front gate he goes make sure this. militia that we got coming is friendly. all I had left was my M4 that's all I. had ammo left for it's all I had my. peashooter it's daytime now and um I. remember asking Bob. I go Roger that Chief I got front gate. understood can you give me some. description of who I'm looking for he. goes I don't know Tano I said Bob I said. Chief do you have vehicle colors. Insignia I an ID he goes we don't have. any of that information and I'm the TL.

needs to be start chipping in I'm asking. the TL the same things I go there. uniforms I can look for do I have. communication via cell phone my my my. burn phone can I call somebody you guys. have communication we lost communication. I go give me a number number Bob at. least he goes our team leader comes. across R and he goes Tano the with the. numbers between 30 to 50 they're all. technicals like holy [ __ ] and I got on. the radio and we didn't put in the movie. but I I said and you guys expect me to. fight these [ __ ] off with a peas.

shooter I said Roger that again no. response cuz why why keep poking the. bear cuz they I'll keep giving him [ __ ]. and I just said to him and I go on my. radio I clicked it one more time I said. Bob you've been a plethora of. information and I I really. appreciate and being a smartass and I. went dark and I saw him coming Pablo. played it I it still breaks I mean it. does it breaks my heart when I see it. because he played it so spoton because. that's how exactly I felt I'm watching.

these technicals and it is a huge. militia they bad you know you know what. technicals are those Hues with those. discas or anti-aircraft guns in the back. or a PKM mounted and it's it's bad. militia and uh as they're coming in I. get behind that parit wall at 3 foot. high and I made myself a small as I. could and I had the EOTech it was on and. I put the EOTech on the passenger. because I'm thinking to myself you know.

hey this ain't over it's not over till. it all over it's not over till it ends. man and I'm dead or they're dead it's. probably going to be me and all I'm. thinking is that diska is going to rip. me in half and I hope it's. quick but I'm thinking to myself I'm at. least going to get one of them and I got. my infrared dot I mean my uh EOTech on. the passenger who looks like a commander. I don't know but he's passenger and then. I'm just rotating back and forth from. the diska Gunner to the pasture because. if I see the diska Gunner move and he. hits that fly I'm going hit that fly.

then fly trigger I'm going to pull pull. my trigger at least get him and then. I'll get ripped up but I just couldn't. think of anything else I had no way to. connect them I learned the Jambo and. mosul at morz because we had suing these. guards and every time we leave the gate. they would throw up the Jambo to me in. 2008 so one day I stopped and asked him. I said what does that mean d they this. it means good morning it officially is. Swahili it means good morning you'll see. it on shirts and app I said jumbo but. because the shock is much cooler and.

it's be cool they've kind of adopted. that that's what they told me I said so. it just means be cool so I would throw. that up and every time I threw it up if. I wanted to see if somebody was friendly. if I got it back I'm here so nine times. out of 10 It was friendly and I couldn't. take it anything else and I went like. this and I man I was I I was you could. have put a lump of cult my ass it would. have been a diamond like that I was like. just. tight and they're both chewing cot I. remember the cck cuz they had big wats.

of cot in their mouth for those that. don't know what cot is it's an. amphetamine they dip before they go into. battle it's a it's like a leaf but it's. it's like chewing Copa it's like mixing. Copenhagen with cocaine and steroids. it's what it is and it rot your teeth it. turns your mouth Brown you chew it all. enough it's it's it makes you look like. a heroin addict if you chew it and they. look like they' been chewing it forever. just gross. and caught everywhere and I remember. doing this I went like this and I I'm.

thinking to myself this is going to. hurt and the pasture reached out and he. smiled at me he smiled huge. cot Brown teeth and he went and he was. that close I could see him that vividly. and he smil. threw the Jambo up and the disca Gunner. got took it one hand off the fly took. off that diska the back and he went like. this no and it was [ __ ] and I said. people watch the movie like that's so. that's so dramatized like oh that's the. [ __ ] what happened and I said my wife is.

gorgeous my kids are beautiful beautiful. smiles but they know this and I told him. I said honey I love you H you got a. beautiful. smile but that SM that that c fil still. just the most beautiful smile I've ever. seen in my life and and I did I did lose. it it was like for briefly I did I just. kind of let it out and I got on the. radio and I went there with us there.

with. us and I I me I'm hoping the movie what. Al them felt like you seen the movie I'm. hoping that's how they felt in there. where it just. was. somebody what had happened and I I don't. know how Bob didn't get this [ __ ]. information since the commander was. right in there the buddies that took the. militi the militia that took the MTAR. team out they went and got more of their. buddies so they just got more Qaddafi. people so we got saved by Qaddafi. twice wow and that and uh and then we.

got out of there you know and got to the. Airfield and there was some there was. some fights over our vehicles I mean in. the movie It showed a few guys there was. actually probably about 15 guys that. wanted our vehicles it was kind of. common cuz some guy inded is AK when. they were fighting over so we're in the. middle and we're trying to get people on. and in this game this is respect I have. for oos and I've said it before I think. it was either with you or with. uh but again you respect even if you. don't like people you respect and give.

respect when it's due and again he did. he was John Wayne he said the coolest. [ __ ] thing and he did say this when. we got there we were trying to help him. off the back of the truck and get on the. plane and he wouldn't let us help. he climbed his yeah for real not he. climbed his own ass down from the. building bleeding I don't know if he. said it during his interview he may have. but that was pretty [ __ ] impressive. he was down pepper shrap arms playing. off and he he climbed down a ladder. one-handed he slipped on a rung and.

caught himself with his elbow and then. he walked himself down so me and O may. not get along but he's one of the. toughest son [ __ ] I've ever been with. and when he said that I was like God. dang I wish I would have said that I. said damn that's some John Wayne clinty. with [ __ ] right there and he walked in. there and the flight attendants were. what did he say again I walked into this. country I'm going walk out he said it. wasn't movie it wasn't script that's. what he said we're all standing there.

and all of us were like damn man I'll. say it's. um it's just nice to hear you guys have. a healthy respect for each other you do. you have to you go through that and uh I. said you don't you're not going to get. along with everybody you can't hang out. with every I'm not for everybody believe. believe me they' be like man I hate that. son [ __ ] but if I need him and I want. him on with me in the front with me and. there are some that don't some I hate. that some [ __ ] I don't want anywhere. near me And there's some that man if we.

go through the gates of hell I want you. standing right next that's just that's. just humans that's just how we are. you're not going to like everybody but. if you have a job to do and this goes in. corporate world this goes in the. military anywhere private military. you have a goal you need to reach that. goal you better be all on the same Focus. the same path now you may have different. jobs but don't create more drama by not. liking each other and that that's a good. leader that puts you in positions that. don't make you co-mingle all the time.

which ran did he put us in jobs and. responsibilities that if we had to do. stuff together we did but if it wasn't. necessary then he wasn't forcing us so. we had a healthy dose of each other when. we needed but if we didn't like we. didn't write all together it wasn't. necessary for us to me and him do do the. do the I can't call you know it's got. names for it wasn't necessary for us to. do the meetings and the pickups and all. that together you didn't do that you. didn't and you had leaders that would. force guys to ride you don't want no we.

didn't like each other so there's other. guys Oz T you just don't have to ride. together there's plenty other people. here and they put us in different. Vehicles yeah so um but the what was. funny and comical on that is is uh it. only showed in the movie that the the. flight attendant put one towel down on. the stairs cuz o was bleeding over. everything she actually came down was. putting multiple towels all along the. stairs and was putting them in the fusel. [ __ ] cuz she was more worried about. blood getting all over the plane then.

then Oz helping Oz into the plane she. didn't give him my hand nothing she just. let him walk up like wow if that ain't. honestly that's probably more closer to. humanity. today how people are today that it. really was back then but he got on there. and uh Dave God bless bub dude bub. sacrificed his life saved two guys he. gave himself John 15:13 man you. exemplified.

that Dave and Oz would have bled out. Dave was bleeding out he went into a con. he went into convulsions twice because. his tourniquets kept coming loose so he. was losing so much blood we were out of. IVs. but because that plane was there we had. a little bit of a miss a little bit of a. problem when we got everybody on the. plane as we got everybody on the plane. we heard a pop somebody shot their gun. on the plane the heating and air. guy had a pistol all if all the.

contractors had sidearms if they were. weapons qualified our HVAC guy that was. a contractor there with us he had a. pistol he took it out to clear it. dropped the magazine and instead of. racking the slide he pulled the trigger. and he shot the plane so the plane sat. there for an extra 10 minutes while we. tried to locate the Bullet cuz the pilot. wouldn't fly if there was a hole in the. Fus Lodge and we got lucky it lodged in. one of the iron frames with the back of. a seat wow add insult to injury and just. comical comical [ __ ] wow and finally we.

found it that's when it got out of there. and um there was a Libyan a western. trained Libyan doctor and one of the. Deltas had 18 Deltas had got back to. Tripoli. um from that I I don't if it was from. the sift team or he'd come in from. jibuti or but there was a Delta that was. waiting there an 18 Delta from one of. the groups that was working in the. region and I still don't know who it was. I just know it was it was an SF guy and. they got they got him stabilized Dave.

stabilized Dave good to go they got Oz. good to go and then we sat and waited. and that's when I inspected the. ambassador's body they brought his body. on I opened up the body bag and again. I don't think he was Des you know his. genitals were mutilated I didn't look. and I didn't see blood down there but. that doesn't mean nothing they could. have cleaned it up and just pulled his. pants on but I didn't see any marks that. indicated he was drugged through the. streets which is what I was looking for. TIG looked at him too and Tig didn't see.

anything that indicated that as well so. we're saying no could it have happened. sure could have but we didn't see it um. C130 landed at 10:30 and as I'm seeing. it come in you you you know you've been. you know the telltale signs even from a. distance of what a 130 looks like coming. in it's beautiful coming in dueling just. cracking looking at the tail boom and. I'm thinking to myself F well better. late than never America. who and uh as it gets closer I'm like.

are my eyes deceiving me I that that's. red green and black that's not an. American flag and as it gets closer I. verified it's a Libyan flag and it lands. and I remember thinking what it's like. still and I said it to myself myself out. loud to myself I said still no. Americans whatever goes down I figure. we're going to hotload it so it's going. to drive it's going to drop its ramp and. we're going to it's going to turn and. then we're just going to run in and take. off it didn't it went by us went down. about 400 to 600 M Bank to right shut.

its engines. down and that's odd. okay well maybe they need to refuel and. I look at my te I look at the the te I. go is that for us he goes I don't know. and our country te was there as well and. I asked him I go is that for us we. jumped in some cars that we had left we. jumped in the we had another. interpreter um that was our expediter.

from the airport he had a vehicle jumped. down there they were all sitting in the. room drinking chai they were they were. maxing relaxing went to the. pilots we're like is this for and they. had no idea what had just happened they. no idea what had just. happened and we ended up talking them. into flying us. out have faith man wow have faith God I. always tell people never lose your faith. it's amazing that if you have faith your. luck increases it just showed up and.

that was something that honestly I. pushed when we were doing all the. testimonies and I nobody really ever. cared wow um so I just let it go I I. don't push it anymore but I like to tell. about it because it is a question it is. a. man God still in control man yeah and um. I am going to talk about the I do. because this is why I don't when like. Obama or anyone Mike Rogers he's.

Republican he talks [ __ ] about Benghazi. he's terrible man whenever they call. conspiracy or they say oh it didn't. happen the way they said they did when. we got on that plane. and forgive me Katie and Bub's family. but I do want to talk because this is. this is why politicians need to shut. their [ __ ]. mouths is Bub's rig and mortise had sit. in so his arm was when we got on the. plane we l the bodies in we didn't have. body bags for everybody so we had to put.

sheets a sheet over bub because we. didn't have. enough and he had get he had gotten. dropped off the roof by the D boys they. dropped. him I don't know why again I I've come. to turn with that I'm not going to beat. those guys up they're they're they're. hey man they're D boys I know they serve. their country well and they're they're. they did well you if you ever have Mom. you can ask. them but his arm was up in the air so. was you know we had him covered with a.

sheep but his arm was like this the. whole time it's like an elephant in the. room you're on a C130 and I'm on the. we're sitting on this side on the. webbing and they're sitting on that side. of the webbing and you're seeing these. dead bodies here and everybody's pretty. much covered up but Bub's arm is out. there and and everybody's just staring. at. it I'm like what the. [ __ ] okay I was like [ __ ] if I have to. be the one to do it I didn't say it but. that's what I thought and I walked over. there and I thought it was disrespectful. to leave him like that so I just grabbed.

his arm and I went and I ripped it down. and I felt everything. ripped but I could tuck his arm. underneath the the sheet so it could. so we couldn't see it. anymore and. um you know I I I don't I don't know if. that was right or not but I just I. couldn't WR an hour watching his and. everybody was staring at it and it was. just silent on the plane it's like.

nobody wanted to acknowledge that that. had that was going on or maybe what had. just happened and it was like f was I. and maybe this is the I have everybody I. have a little sociopath because it's. like man do I always have to be the one. to to do the do the dirty [ __ ] that's. what I kind felt but it but I'm glad I. did because I I. know I I thought it was more. disrespectful to leave his arm up in the. air and leave him in that position and. get him settled get his arm underneath.

and have him be in a respectful position. and that still bothers me and I don't. really talk I don't talk about that too. much because one of all I don't talk. about it a lot because uh it bothers a. [ __ ] obviously. um but because I I don't want to. disrespect the dhy family by saying that. that you know maybe it they they would. think of it like a desecration and. that's not what it was for me I mean you. did it out of respect man that's that's. what I that's what it was and and it's.

not a rationalization and I uh but I. also you you're just doing the best you. can that's it you always respect family. though you always respect other people's. family because especially people you. serve with because you want them to. respect your family and and I love I. think Katie and what she's done with the. Glen Dy Memorial foundation and and and. and Glenn's brother with they they're. amazing people and um Mrs dhy passed. away I think a few years ago well but um. now I have the most respect for them.

because they lost their son. needlessly and um I just didn't want to. harp on that but I do want people to. understand and know that so when they. hear a politician say Benghazi. is a conspiracy or magazi didn't happen. or those guys are not telling the story. right I want them to hear stuff like. that because. that's that's why I get angry nobody. believes politicians hope they don't I. hope not. well regardless that happened and we got.

back to Tripoli and went back and you. know we we got off the plane we went to. the uh the annex there in Tripoli I I. took a shower and got some food food. and I was a big Copenhagen Dipper at the. time so I was like man does somebody. have Copenhagen I need some Co big dip. in there's actually a picture there was. one picture taken of me sitting on the. steps of the annex and tripley I. borrowed somebody's New York Yankees hat. I didn't have any clothes cuz it wasn't. able to get my gear so I borrowed.

somebody's white Under t-shirt and I had. somebody's pants on that didn't fit me. so it looks like I'm a lot bigger than. what I am down there but I'm not CU they. were tight too tight on me and I'm have. a big old dip in and my sunglasses on. and I'm trying to come to terms with it. all and I got some food in my belly and. then uh then we they load all the. contractors none of the staffers they. load all the contractors on a B on a. motorcade the Jer guys are there we load.

in their cars we drive down the. Airfield the Air Force crew chief she. was awesome broke every rag in the world. to let us load those flag drape coffins. they already had the flag she was. incredible she already had them flag. drap coffins ready to go pristine it was. you couldn't have done any better than. that do she was incredible and the the. pilot Eric stall Lieutenant Colonel Eric. stall who was a c17 wonderful every rig. in the world they broke to accommodate. us they had already loaded Oz is Oz was.

already on I got I'm not going to post. it because it's it's for Oz you know but. I got a picture of him where he's in his. gurnie IV's in he's coherent he's doing. this to me. but he's on the plane Dave is sedated of. course he's out cuz he's massive massive. trauma get the Coffins. on ramp closes we take off and we fly to. uh fly to. Germany and then we get to Germany and.

um plain Lance I didn't let go of my. rifle the whole time or my ammo give two. [ __ ] it's not going anywhere stay right. next to me with my ammo so when we get. there and I wish I would have known what. I know now about General ham but he's on. the way to greet us the eurom commander. he's the one that controls the eurocom. forces there he's the one that can. sacrifice his position and tell Obama. and Hillary to go f themselves and send. US. troops well he gets on.

and I don't even remember what he said. to be honest with you I just remember he. said something positive to us you know. he's infantry guy Ranger tab all. that and all I remember is I remember. going up to him saying Hey sir is there. an amnesty box anywhere cuz I got a. bunch of ammo I need to I need to. download and that's my conversation with. him but if I would have known that he. didn't he could have sent people and he. didn't and I probably would had a. different conversation but I didn't know. at the. time yeah he goes yeah sir he's he's a.

good job he goes great job man and he. goes it's right over there and I walk. over there and there's a Sargeant hor. like a sergeant h i don't say Sergeant. hars but whatever the ammo Dr and. there's a there's a sergeant there uh. and I gave a Tech Sergeant Air Force guy. I gave him the. ammo and uh that's why I always tell. people support the Uso because they were. already there waiting for us and this. lady come she was the nicest lady 50s. something lady blonde hair about 5 fo 6.

she comes up to me and she goes she goes. she they already know what happen they. know what happened they know the story. they know where coming from um anyway. they don't know where agency they just. know that there was a battle there's. some deaths there's some military and. some civilians coming in get your [ __ ]. ready and they already had stuff laid. out like toilet trees. underwear you know clothes. shoes and she comes up to me and she. goes what' you lose she goes what you. you okay I said yes ma'am she goes what'. you lose I said ma'am I lost.

everything she goes okay and she started. taking me around and I got some you know. I got some jammies I got some sweats Uso. sweats and and I got my toiletries and. then we got to the end of it she goes. write down what you need I said ma'am. she goes no I need you to write down. what you need cuz you might be here for. about four or five days I said every. what she goes anything so I'm just doing. you know I lost my tennis shoes I lost. my jeans I lost my t-shirts and I gave. her a list and it was it was a full page. of stuff I lost I wasn't being a dick I.

lost my you know lost my PlayStation was. like I stuff I I handed it to her and I. go back to my room and they put us into. a nice room it's Air Force it's nice. rooms man it's like a hotel I it felt. like a hotel we put us in we're right. next to the BX which Air Force Base. Exchange Army PX Post Exchange Air Force. BX and I lay down for a second I can't. sleep I knock on my door at 1:00 a.m. cuz we're we got in real late we got in. like at 11: to the to Germany when we.

finally got there and it was her and she. had two bags she goes here she goes I. got your. stuff and um I didn't I didn't break. down in front of her but I did what I. Clos the door cuz it. was first time I'd felt where PE where. someone generally. cared like actually gave a [ __ ] not like.

Bob who came after when we're at tripley. and he goes thanks man thank you and I I. think he was trying to be sincere but. when you're that long in the agency your. sincerity is never no not there anymore. or having somebody say man great job it. wasn't and the GRS guys they don't know. what you know we what do we say you know. it it I know it's sincere but it's a. it's like good job fist bone but actual. like a mother figure. saying caring it meant a lot and.

um and then I uh you I put the clothes. on she got me some jeans she got me some. running shoes I felt normal and uh to. shower and then. I slept for about four or five. hours and then I got up and I turned the. TV on and I saw Susan Rice already on. TV and I remember I called Jack and they. were saying video and a protest and I. like I said are you seeing this [ __ ]. [ __ ] and we turned it on and I just.

turned it off and I he turned it off and. we didn't want to watch it cuz we. figured at that point we're like. somebody's going to tell the truth you. still have some optimism that there's. some heart and some integrity within the. government that somebody is going to say. something and we still had that at that. point it had only been a day you know. who knows if I had have known what I. know. now 12 years later it probably would. have been more vocal at that point in.

time but we still had that we still had. that faith that there was still. integrity and ethics and morality in DC. we hadn't seen behind the curtain yet we. had a little bit but not really you know. because we didn't that wasn't our job. and we stayed on there and then uh I. remember that night we got super piss. drunk there's still a picture that I'll. post every once in a while of Me Jack. Boone and Tig and actually the safe to. part Alec was on one side but I'll crop.

him out because I just I don't know if. he wants to be seen and I'm smiling a. little bit and I still I I honestly feel. bad that I'm doing like what the I'm. looking at going what the [ __ ] am I. smiling at. but I remember that I'm just trying to. get through it and I remember that I was. I was drunker than [ __ ] dude I was so Dr. and we had been laughing together. healing together before that picture was. taken cuz TIG was telling me man did you. man this is what I did and boom and some.

of the [ __ ] is comical that's why I'm. glad we got the comical [ __ ] in the. movie because that's you know you know. that happens man they miss the bravado. is there in all the movies Lone Survivor. America sniper blackhaw down you know. even ours but they miss a lot of the. Jack asery and that's one thing we like. Mike we got to get that in there because. that that happens that's actually more. re more prevalent than the brav. bravado and so I remember we were. telling a story and I can't remember the. story that it was but we were laughing. because I was like holy [ __ ] I can't. believe that just I think it was I think.

it was TIG talking when he said when he. uh one of the one of the spos one of the. base security guys that we had there. called TIG in of the office said can you. come look at the monitor um I've got. some problems in uh in um the Sheep. slaughterhouse area and he went down. there to look and the Sheep were jumping. on each. other and he's like yeah I went down. there and I was watching these videos. and the Sheep were running around in a. circle and they were jumping on each. other and jumping on each other well all.

the Sheep are doing they're trying to. get away but they can't get away cuz. they're in a pen they're in a circle and. it looks like they're humping and he did. that the the ba the SPO goes so you. think people are sneaking under there he. goes I don't know it's either that or. the sheeper humping and the the SPO goes. well what do you think it is he goes he. goes man it was like 2:30 at night goes. I don't know nothing about sheep so it. was just funny it was dumb but it was. funny cuz it was just again ludicrous. [ __ ] so when you see that in the movie. you're like was that part of the no that.

actually that that happened and that's. that's what's so funny about and it is. funny and and with 13 hours but it's. just the night in itself is just just. the stupid [ __ ] that the stupid stuff. that we said to just to make each other. laugh or just stuff that comes out of. your mouth or rub some dirt on a kid you. know after a guy blows his hand off I. mean it's it's there and and. and I I still remember laughing and. getting in that picture because of that.

story that TIG told and but when I look. back at the pick though it still hurts. me a little bit because I there's. nothing I need to be smiling about there. we had just lost two guys we just lost. in Ambassador We Lost Sea who hadn't. seen com that's two weeks I've been. doing that for 10 years and I've been. pretty relatively. unscathed he's dead and here I am. smiling a day after the attack all of us. were and it it it bothers me that. picture I still will post it because I.

do want it tell always any picture that. I post on social media I know it's not. the cool thing to do I always have a. story behind it cuz I want it's. therapeutic for me but also maybe. someone will learn from yeah you know. but yeah we there and then we went. home um the reason they kept all the. staffers there um including Sarah she's. she can tell you more about it than I. can she has already she's already talked. about it and they flew us out is because.

they didn't want our input on how they. were going to write the report of what. took place so they flew all of us. contractors out I didn't know that. either if any of us would have known. that we thought they were just being. cool it's like oh they're getting us out. of here we got to go home it was no cuz. they're going to fly portray us in so. they can get debriefed without us here's. Agency for it w that's. it wow we went back to um went back to. langland you know you you stop you turn. in your dip passport you do your debrief.

that's where I we did our our big. debrief up on the seventh up on um 7th. floor and we went through this is what. happened we we mapped it all out we. stayed there for an extra day we went. through what we all. did and um you know they did a big like. really was just a big a like you do in. the military we're up there and this is. we moove we're again and then we went. downstairs and we sat with all the GRS. head [ __ ] out of you know that worked. out of the out of Langley there the guys.

that worked out of the building and. that's where we went through another AR. they're like what' you do what happened. and that's when they asked me like I. just said ear when we talked about. earlier about our TL they go so how' the. TL do and they said his name and I said. you did great and really and Boon kind. of looked at me. like and I said yeah he did great cuz he. stayed out of the [ __ ] way what was. their. reaction what are they going to say to. me it was one put his head down and. snickered cuz he knew who he was the.

other two they just looked at me didn't. say a word and I didn't say a word and I. looked right back at him and Boon was. laughing the whole time too Boon's. laughing so what could they say I got no. what are they going to say to me I not. but been around long enough I know who. you guys are you know who I am we can. and I what would a normal human being. say to you. nothing and uh these people who the hell. knows well I was also and not that I'm I.

got I've I've gotten my ass kicked. enough times but I'll fight if we need. to fight and that's what it was like he. stayed out of the [ __ ] way and it was. stay out of the [ __ ] way and then. when my eyes I'm going what the [ __ ] are. you guys going to do about it yeah and. yeah they probably Whoop I'm a little. guy I get my. ass get situation but it's it's that I. mean there's just so many staffers that. have no concept of what that might be. like because they haven't done it. they've never done anything and uh.

nothing and do you know what that's I. don't that's why I didn't get any. response back because if they would have. had a set of balls they would somebody. would have said something but I do also. think the one that was laughing that. snickering and smiling giving a little. smirk he had been downrange before I'd. worked him a few times they also knew. the truth they knew what were they they. knew they knew that he wasn't going to. do anything so that's why one was in the. corner going you know it's Boon's. sitting there going after he looks at me.

and I said it he's like he just started. laughing Boon doesn't laugh you like. that he just started laughing and. everybody's on our side Snicker and so. what are they going to say they know I'm. right and if they did then they would. but nobody said no nobody said anything. and then I also continue to work what's. that staffer who did oh yeah he's still. working the the TL he's still working. pretty sure he's still working he's. still come on you know the deal he ain't. going nowhere he he he played the role. he didn't say a word when he testified. he testified against everything that we.

said he never testified with. us he testified on his own he testified. once with TIG cuz TIG was still working. TIG was the last one to. quit all of us went to Yemen T went to. Lebanon so myself and Jack went to sa. after we took our 30-day our 60 days off. and then we went back son bone went to. Aiden T went to. Lebanon you only took 60 days off I took. 75 I took an extra couple weeks yeah.

that's it I had to get back on that. horse man what was. the what was the first conversation like. with your wife and kids I actually. called her from the Airfield there's a. wonderful wonderful I'm glad they got. this right in the movie you just see. Jack's perspective where he calls home. we paraphrase in the movie because we. got all what we all said then they we. had a wonderful writer named Chuck Hogan. who mashed it together and got all of. our BAS our words in into that monologue.

when Jack's on his phone or krinski and. I remember I called her on the atar Mac. and I said hey you're going to see. something on the. news that's us. I said I'm fine I love you I said I'll. be home as soon as I. can and then she goes what happened I. said I can't really talk about it but we. lost. one and I metant Rong and you know this. still bothers me a little bit too cuz I. really wasn't thinking about bub I was.

thinking of the teammate even though BB. had come from Tripoli but I said we lost. and I said on an open line I said we. lost ran and um that's all I can say. said I'll talk to you when I get to and. I didn't know where I was going I I said. I'll talk to you when I talk to you and. I hung up the. phone and uh yeah I I every one of us. had a phone call like that Jack's Jack. was the closest to rone out of all of us. there Ron and Bub so his conversation.

was a little bit more emotional than. than ours but it. was it still was hey you're going to see. some on the news it's over we're okay or. I'm okay. yeah we we lost some people be home when. we can love you. bye and then uh my conversation when I. got to Germany was a little bit more in. depth but I had to be careful because. you we're on open lines and it wasn't I. was worried about the bad guys listening.

to us it. was I started to figure it out yeah you. know Toto started to open that curtain. where the Great and Powerful Oz was and. I started to. see who who the enemies not really are. cuz the terrorists are the enemies too. but that we also have enemies in our own. house that don't want the truth to come. out so I was I was more careful about. what I would talk about on an open line. um and then when we got back to Langley. and all that you know there are debriefs.

I did also tell them as well because of. that because of that uh 203 incident. where TIG lost the 203 and I couldn't. find that other one I sat down with them. cuz you can [ __ ] about a problem but if. you're going to [ __ ] about a problem. have a solution to it and I remember. sitting there with him I go you guys. know that for some. reason we didn't have enough 69s out. there I said if we would have had enough. 203s for all of us the fight would have. ended way before it did you know at 5:30.

we would have crushed them they would. never have touched this again so in the. future every jurus operator is has to be. just like when we were in the military. everybody has to have a 6 everybody has. to have M4 everybody has to have a 203. everybody has to have an sr25 everybody. has to have the right gear for the right. op and then they get a pick which gear. they need when they head out cu this is. [ __ ] I said we're the agency and we. don't have enough. 203s I said what the [ __ ] is that.

obviously Phil on defers but I even said. I said even ground branch has every. weapon system they need and I get it. they're da we're not but but that's. horseshit this is why everybody needs. every weapon system because if this. happens again and we lose one we're not. out an entire weapon system that could. have been a GameChanger a force. multiplier like a 203 and from what I. heard and you kept working I don't think.

I think that fell on DEA ears it didn't. it fell on DEA ears so [ __ ] those [ __ ]. those pieces of [ __ ] how hard is it to. get an extra 203 or an extra 46 for the. guys when especially when there's only. five guys on it on a team or an extra. glm something you know so but I remember. saying that to him because I was pretty. pissed I was I was pissed at that. because again I felt. like we're the run of the litter and so. what if we are but guess what this run. of the litter just turn the tables. without any assets at.

all it's not easy being a ranger or. Delta or seal it's not you're doing da. stuff but it is nice and it is. heartening to have a Spectra gunship. [ __ ] overlook you it is nice if you. are a Seal Team going out there to have. a patona Rangers that got your back or. vice. versa when you're on your own and that's. it and you don't have all those. assets it's it can be a it can it can be. a little bit more scary that you don't. have all those protections and so that's.

why give us everything we need and I'm. not asking for much it's not like I'm. asking for a Dap cover I'm not asking. for you know I'm just asking for can. y'all get us at least each of us have a. 20. three how long did it take you Chris for. I. mean I mean you were abandoned by the US. government yeah in all aspects that's. that's I wish I could tell you different. but that's that's what happened how long. did it take you to rid yourself of that.

anger 200 um the end of 2017 2018 when I. reconciled my wife I tried to from 14 on. six years six years yep cuz all that. time in between and that's when we had. gotten divorced I was sleeping around. you know that's why we got divorced it. was me and my me and my infidelity I was. drinking a shitload I was drinking all. the time um I was gone all the time I.

was. speaking how did you reconcile that. first you have to reconcile with God man. how'd you do that stood in the mirror. and said God I need your help help carry. me I can't do this anymore after uh I. even remember exactly what I was I was I. was uh at home by myself because you. know they lived out I lived by my Liv by. myself I was you know was a. divorce our little I still had our. little guy you our little guy was still. a baby so that was hard cuz I was like.

holy [ __ ] I'm missing childhood a child. again because of my own stupidity but I. remember I was in the shower doing The. Crying Game thing in the shower I was. like my life sucks this is awful you. know and I had you know I had millions. of followers this is before I [ __ ]. canned all my social media accounts so I. had like a [ __ ] I don't remember 275,000. followers on Instagram and I think I had. 300 on Twitter when it was Twitter and. so Facebook was like I that was what was.

important in my life right that is so. [ __ ] enterc vapid but that's what was. my focus was was myself ego and. and I realized that that wasn't that was. leaving me Hollow than the toxic. relationships then trying to fill it. with alcohol then trying to fill it with. money I had a lot of money tons of money. didn't make me. happy and um it was when I realized that. I can't do this anymore God I need you I.

I do I need you I was in the shower I. did The Crying Game thing crying in the. shower naked got out of the shower I had. my glock it was right there and I I. looked in the mirror and I did I I put. it right. here and I thought back you know I. thought I just briefly I said okay hard. life you have you had it not hard as but. you know was rough you you you you got. this disease that you're you're winning. you're winning the Crohn's disease fight.

you got it under control you got kicked. out of the military you fought your way. to get back in you made it and you got. through Ranger school and you did what. you want to do there you conquered that. even though their odds were against. you your your grandson of immigrants. that work their asses off to give you. everything you've got that Gene of that. you don't give up like your grandma. you're a Willa and a Willa Willa and. Willow and then 10 years. overseas seeing death and seeing life.

and getting through all that making a. bad call in Iraq that I made a bad call. in Iraq where a little Iraqi girl died. that I could have saved her in 2005 in. the Monsour District he went through. Benghazi and he got through that and now. the devil's going to win this battle for. your soul that's what I. thought and I looked in the mirror and. that's when I said I looked around I. said God carry me I can't do. this and I H just put the gun down and I. stopped.

crying and I went and grabbed the phone. and I called my my she was my ex-wife. the time Tanya and they were on vacation. in Disney World they had taken off for. Christmas they were going on vacation uh. in the divorce she got the DFC. membership but they were there and I. said. uh can I come spend Christmas with you. guys and no hesitation she goes yes come. on. and and uh I mean it's like God answered.

me like that there was no there's no. delay there was nothing I got a play I. got on you I got on uh you know by that. time I had more miles to orbit the sun. on every freaking airpl in the world I. got on a Delta got a ticket flew out the. next. day and they were staying at the. Polynesian Village at one of the little. Huts there on the water and it was. freaking. awesome best vacation ever and with that.

that was the life really that was it the. life changed stopped doing the media I. did one more written fox interview for. the fox e media it was and and that's. why I I said I'm done anger's. gone God's got Hillary God's got Obama. he will take care of him I don't need to. judge anybody who am I to judge anybody. they will be judged Let It Go and life's. been grave ever since I stopped doing so. much Social I stopped doing a lot of I.

don't do 60 70 talks to year anymore I. do like 10 I [ __ ] can all my social. media I just got rid of all of it now I. got back on when I got my head right my. wife is a big part of that too so she's. it's not just me it's me and her dude. but that was huge it was that was so. toxic and and um that's why I I don't I. I give guys people [ __ ] for protecting. those accounts or making them so. important because they're not at all and. I got rid of all of them and uh.

business- wise went a different. direction as too as far as business goes. which means I minimized it still had. some battle line stuff but I stopped. doing the traveling course courses as. much and I focus on being home. and we also ended up getting remarried. so worked on a relationship it took time. and how that worked is we just started. dating again it wasn't like we got right. back in it it was we still lived. separately and then we would just start. going on dates how did your kids react. when you came back in the. picture.

they I mean they were happy that Dad was. there especially at Disney we're having. fun and but it was it was awkward for. the two older ones because they really. didn't know what to think I mean this. Dad going again is he going to be here. this time is he leaving but also at that. time they were so used to me being gone. anyway even when we were married from. point it wasn't it wasn't anything that. it was odd and they were pushing me away. and also because Mom and Dad aren't. arguing anymore they're not yelling at.

each other anymore so it was it was. happier environment um if it was like a. a normal white a normal job 9 to5 or all. a sudden I disappeared and I came back. maybe they would have been a little bit. more uh it would have creeped him out. weirded him out a little bit but because. Dad was always gone. anyway I I saw Zim being a little. happier but as we talked about earlier. they still were very reserved. and I don't know if this is for real you. know Dad was mean whenever we come back. from ra he's going to be mean Dad and.

and he makes he makes mom cry and that's. what they would see you know. and so it just took time a year of. dating of just more dating of then. spending more time together of then the. kids in maybe staying over then. eventually it just ended up to like just. like a normal where you're dating. somebody and it develops into a into a. relationship that a marriage and we had.

to do it that way and it was it was a. little weird but it was fun doing it. that way cuz I I got to you know I got. to do things that maybe I didn't do the. first time I quartered her where I did. so it was it was like a. doover and uh it was awesome oh it was. great it everything was fantastic I did. have some I I did have some where I. would still get angry times because just. because it's just seeing what you saw. not anything where it was infidelity or. anything like that no I that's terrible.

I'm a terrible person I hate even saying. but I I'm going to be honest with you. man and she I mean obviously she knows I. wrote about it in some of the books that. I've written it's but. there are times still where I would get. angry you know the the and. post-traumatic stress whatever you want. to call it shell shock you just you. remember you just the anxiety was there. but I said the CBD really did help I did. get on an anxiety medication but all the. VA does is just and I I got good VA.

Midwest they do take care of but all. that does is just create more problems. the CBD helped I sto drinking you know. even though I have my own vodka when I. say stop drinking I have a drink with my. wife. maybe once a month you know um and I. also made it a point to be a father be. home this is where I want to be and uh I. did realize that in 2017 2018 I did a.

contract my last contract it was to uh. Costa Rica it was an anti- kidnapping. contract for a private firm in Texas to. find an American that had gotten. kidnapped and so I was still Contracting. a little bit wasn't going to the Middle. East anymore but I was still doing some. South America stuff and I was it was. Halloween time and I was there for. Halloween and my wife sent me a picture. of my son peanut my daughter going out. to trick-or. treat and you know that feeling you got. to go down range I got to it was gone I.

was cuz all I could see was the picture. and all I'm thinking to myself is what. in the [ __ ] am I still doing this. for and you I finished my contract those. and luckily those things are real short. you know they're you find the guy or you. don't he's you're going to find him. alive in a few weeks or you're going to. pass it on to the next guy or he's going. to be dead and he did they it was an. American that they held for ransom they. they did find the culprits and we found.

he was dead they he but contract's over. I flew back and man just everything re. my son I reconciled my 16-year-old boy. we had that inning at Olive ging that. incident. where how did you propose to your wife. the first time second time the second. time uh I didn't get down on my knee. she's not that kind of woman dude she's. not that type of. woman it was honestly very nonchalant.

and it it was just you know we saw our. rings and I put my ring back on she you. still wearing your ring I said well I am. now I said where's your ring she got s. box I said do you want to do this again. and of course I knew the answer she's. tough as nails dude and um it was back. at Disney again you know and as much. people hate Disney and I do their their. politics are horeshit but it still can. be a happy place for the family a lot of. happy things happened there and we were.

actually R running around a What's this. called the um Polynesian Village there's. another one out there where there's a. massage place um. the white one it's it's like a southern. Resort Southern I can't remember the. name of it but we're running out there. jogging and we. stopped and I said will you marry me. again and she just laughed just like cuz. it was so corny I'm such a nerd it so.

corny and she laughed and just. yeah and really it was the smile and she. has a beautiful smile when she really. wants to smile she doesn't like smiling. CU she thinks her smile is ugly but it's. gorgeous and she just gave me her. gorgeous squinny eyed big ass smile and. um we sold her house she had a second. house in Omaha we went back she got. ready for sale we sold it she moved back. into my house in Omaha or or say our.

house cuz it was our house that's what. we we bought it together when I was in. the. military and um then we stayed there for. a few years and it was it was it was. married I was and I was. I was a husband finally she was always a. wife I couldn't ask for a better wife. you know couldn't ask for a better. partner couldn't ask for a better woman. cuz she's just she's just a wonderful. wonderful person and she's wonderful for. me cuz she's not sappy if IID have went. down on my knee and did all that stuff. she would have told me.

no it had to be doing something athletic. we're out running cuz that's how she is. and me just throwing it at her and her. being and and that's how you are and. that's how I I am yeah and she knows. that. um and she put her ring back on and and. I even asked her I said I'll buy you a. huge because you know I had a little bit. of money at that time I and. um I said I'll buy you a huge Rock what. do you want I get you huge Rock she goes. I you know I don't want those huge I. don't need diamonds I don't I don't wear.

I wouldn't wear that cuz I'm fine with. what I have and it was our original ring. that I bought her when we got married in. the courthouse in Tacoma before I went. to Ranger school I a second range. Battalion and um and then we stayed. there in Omaha for a while and Omaha. changed just like all cities. do and um it wasn't the Omaha that I. remember you know good values and there. are good people in Omaha there are. wonderful people but it started to turn. like cities do Amazon moved in Google.

moved in Warren Buffett is Warren. Buffett the tearing down. cornfields uh there was even riots. protests in Omaha at the time and we're. like we're out we're not here and and um. we moved to. Kansas and that is a good woman she is. she is wonderful and know because nobody. you were the first person that's asked. me that because nobody's ever asked me.

that. and I think it's an awesome I do I think. it's awesome. because it it just to me it reminds me. of how awesome she is and how she's not. a girly girl she doesn't want the girly. girl stuff and and I did think about. proposing to her like doing the. proposing and on and down because we're. in we're in Disney and we're we're at. the resort I wish I could remember that. damn it's right next to Polynesian. Village it's the old southern Resort.

it's the perfect place for it you know. got the gazebos and and uh and but I. never would do that I like there's no. way because I did think about that like. man I got to suppos her the right come. on on a beach somewhere and I it's like. no way if I did that she would think I. was such a she wouldn't believe me first. of all she'd be like what did you. do not yet it was out running and being. athletic it was out and it was it was. perfect for us and then what' we do.

after that we went to the gym and we. worked out. together and it was awesome and I was so. h i just it was it was the the best and. it's still I still have those feelings. when I go home that's why I love where I. live where I just walk in and everything. is. just and I don't need anything I don't. need any anything else but that it's. it's wonderful and she's there and she. has her life you know she doesn't she. doesn't need me to we don't need to be.

doing things together all the time she. coaches volleyball she's very. independent but she'll still come home. if she wants to and she'll make dinner I. don't need to add but it's not required. like to cook too but you know she'll or. she'll come home and she'll say get your. ass up and go make me some. food yes ma'am yes darling and um now. she's she's my angel and I have a tattoo. up here you know I had a cross that she. gave me this is she gave me this before. Libya I've had it since Libya but I had.

another one that I had uh she gave me. one as the military and it said love. love honor courage and I have a tattoo. up here on my chest is that cross and. then I haven't put peanut on there yet. but it has the call signs of all my. other kids it says once it she's Angel. my wife's. Angel my daughter used to be princess. but now she's like my her wife she's not. a prin Dad I'm not a princess don't call. me that but that was her call sign when. she was little now she's.

Kiki and then I have Bubba cuz Bubba is. Bubba and that's them they're always. right. there aming well Chris. there's a lot more we could dive into. but I think that's a perfect way to end. it brother and uh I just want to tell. you. man I saw you. speak I saw how much pain you were in. you know probably probably getting close.

to probably getting close to 10 years. not quite where did you did where did. poone you saw that yeah oh my God that. was that was that was that was demon. time and uh wow I'm just really happy. for you man thank you I can tell you're. at peace now and sounds like you got a. great family and an amazing wife and uh. you deserve it thank you brother and. you're right back at you appreciate. being patient with me and that's that's.

cool that you did see that and and. seeing your pictures downstairs with. your kids and your wife it sounds like. yeah you ain't the boss of the house. either are you brother and we don't need. to be we need somebody that's going to. boss us around and tell us hey our [ __ ]. stinks sometimes and that's right it's. wonderful so thank you bro thanks for. having it was an honor bro no the honor. is not thanks for letting me go down. radical like I do that's just me thank. you God bless Chris God bless you too. brother thank.

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