Justin Hughes - Navy SEAL / Modern-Day Da Vinci | SRS #020

hey everybody we just wrapped up episode 19  with justin hughes it's a really cool interview. get it anyways hey i just wanted to say i wanted  to do a big thank you to our viewers our audience. our patrons if it weren't for you guys and  we didn't have such a badass audience then. we wouldn't be able to help the hundreds of  thousands of vets that this is helping by. bringing these stories out and the guests too  it's helping the guests out tremendously with.

launching their businesses getting their word  out so i just want to say thank you all for that. and it means the world to me  and everybody else involved so. love you guys if you don't mind please  like comment and subscribe to the channel. and i got a new ask we would really appreciate  it i would personally really appreciate it. if you guys shared this episode all over social  media let's make this one go viral all right i.

hope everybody enjoys the show and i love you  guys seriously thank you for everything cheers. one last little piece of advice that  really helped me that i want to pass. on to you guys before the show starts a long  time ago a man much wiser than myself told me.

no matter how bad it gets. donate the yellow snow. enjoy the show. you have to realize that life is precious right  and it doesn't matter if you're wearing a flag. on your shoulder and it's red white and  blue or red white and black or whatever.

whatever it is right life is precious and  those people in that city were suffering. they were being persecuted because  of stuff that they believed.

i just want to do bad things to bullies  right i want to find bad people that hurt.

walk downstairs and uh three of my good  buddies all made it all who made it. they put their arms around me they say  don't worry hughes we're your brothers now. and uh like let's go do another evolution.

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tactics to current events to who's coming on the  show i take suggestions and it's very interactive. no matter what tier you choose the support  is greatly appreciated and it is the only. thing that makes the show drive on so thank  you for all the support see you on patreon. justin hughes shaun ride welcome to the show  thank you so much so you're a former navy seal.

former buds instructor which is a seal  training instructor and now you're an artist. documenting history that's one thing we had this  discussion you know and uh that's kind of what. we do here is document history document you know  modern warriors and and and sacrifices that that. the people have made on the show and and and.

it's just an honor to do it and you do it with  your painting yeah i try to well you do it damn. good job thanks man thank you so much so because  you do such a good job i got you a present duh. this is dense you got any guesses dude. this is like that some plastic  it's not there might be a a cup mug.

shirt damn. this is all right gummy bears. boy some v swag man thanks sean dude all  right so with the gummy bears these are. the softest most delicious gummy bears i  have to put them on the top shelf in my house.

and at 5am in the morning the  first time i came to visit you. i put all my gummy bears on the top  because i want my kids eating them. i wake up two bags gone i'm like where did my  gummy bears go i had to check my my house camera. my kids are like pulling up chairs putting them  in the pantry sneaking into dad's gummy bears. snagging them you know i get them in the  height line chew them out dude this is.

sick they have good taste they do have good  taste they're the best gummy bears and i. you're probably wondering why the hell  there's a paint brush in there and i'm. going to tell you why okay so i want  to trade you okay if if you still have. the brush or a brush that you painted those two  paintings yep that you that that we exchanged.

uh i would love to get two of those brushes and  put them on the back of each painting i got them. i keep every brush really i never know which one  i know exactly which ones perfect different yeah. are they bigger where you can sign them yep yeah  i mean i i'll use like in the span of a painting. i'll probably use like six or seven brushes so  now i can just bring them on and just tell you. which one which ones do you want i would  love that so dude thank you so much and i.

being a fan of the show and watching it  pretty regularly i brought you something. i got you a small gift oh really yeah yeah you  know um so i love friends you flip it around. so i remember your old platoon or at least seeing  pictures of you in hilos with your your patch with. the with it with your shielder on it right yeah it  was kind of like the logo with the spartan helmet.

and so i looked up i think it's greek ancient  greek um the phrase that the spartan women would. say to their men before they leave is with  it or on it and they hand them their shields. and so i just wanted to create something that  like kind of commemorated that platoon over. that patch that time in the team for you and  make you a little one of a one-of-a-kind piece. it's still a little matte so i need to  varnish it when we uh when i come in to. do the other one i'll i'll do it but this is  incredible dude thanks so much man thank you.

john holy [ __ ] yeah we did uh have a patch  and that was kind of our platoon motto was. come back either with your shield or on it  and and then and then after that platoon. that saying kind of went everywhere but  it originated with artful tomb and uh. damn dude thank you yeah this is awesome thanks  i actually had the helmet the helmet was made by.

a company in italy that still makes like the  original corinthian helmets and i ordered one in. bronze so i photographed it painted it all from my  own references and created yeah it's pretty sick. this is very cool yeah thanks one  more time for the for the audience. wow thank you thank you man. all right so you're ready to  dive in yeah let's get into it.

ready yeah all right it's gonna be a  long one all right but uh starting off we. i give patreon i tell them who's coming on the  show i told him about you i've been waiting for. you to come on here for a long time as you know  thank you and uh it's an honor to have you in the. room finally in the hot seat and uh so anyways  i give patreon the opportunity to ask questions. as you know we just did a behind-the-scenes  uh piece and so but i wanted to save two that.

i thought were were good questions uh for the  actual for the actual show here so this is from. jeffrey calman how has his combat experience  influenced his artistic expression jeffrey. you know i think for good storytelling and  accurate storytelling you have to have some. kind of experience with the subject that you're  handling right i think that's why we see a lot of.

filmmakers go to different locations to do  research writers dig into certain subjects. and study law so that they can be accurate in the  things that they're talking about right and for me. in art in combat i think it helps with my subject  matter that i enjoy painting which is kind. of around that warrior archetype specifically  modern warfare and in our military now just to.

capture some of those intricacies and details that  might get lost if another artist painted it right. so for instance the last painting that i did  for you the one of you guys in the sniper ride. the the mesh that's shielding you guys from public  view another artist might not know what that's for. and they might have painted it blocked in or it  might not have had the detail that i think was. necessary for it right because you're shooting  through it and it it shields you from them at a.

distance but not not enough for you to be able  to look through it and and see what's going on. so i think that it's influenced my artistic  expression and that i can capture some of those. intricacies of the job and highlight what's  important and in what we're doing versus the. details that don't necessarily matter as much does  that make sense it does that helps jeffrey and you. do a phenomenal job about it thank you so one more  question this is from mark doubt after hearing you.

talk about missing the people you're you're in  the [ __ ] with does paintings like this make you. miss these times more so i'm not sure if  that question was directed at me or if that. question was directed at you but you go  ahead let's do it let's both do it you go. first all right um does it make me miss the guys  absolutely you know and i'm often looking through.

old pictures of me and the guys and thinking about  you know what what kind of story could i tell here. and and a lot a lot of the guys that i worked  with are still serving so i know that maybe. that's a story that i'll have to save for another  time and with their permission of course but. i can't help but look at the images that even that  i've captured for you and despite that we were in.

different countries or really same both iraq  and yemen right yeah you're in different. countries different times i can't help but  remember going into yemeni cop markets right. or like being on rooftops in iraq and having those  same memories with guys and coking and joking on. and maybe a little bit situations  that should be very very serious but. you know finding laughter in the small things  yeah so yeah it makes me miss them greatly but.

i'm also very happy with where i'm at now and i  think it's important for guys like us to kind of. remember the community but also  figure out a way that we can. we can move on from it and tell a different story  right that's a good answer or something different. yeah you know yeah i look at that and uh the  two guys i'm with right there i don't miss them. but that was about when were you in yemen uh 2014  2000 we might have been there at the same time.

really that photo may have been taken when you  were in country i was like next door buying. bullets in the weapons market nice why you were  buying cotton drugs yeah yeah but that's crazy. but no it did you know and then the one behind me  with uh my two sniper partners the guy next to me.

uh both of those were very good friends of mine  and uh i don't know you know kind of like what. you just said i've been out for a long time now  it's been it's we're creeping up on damn near. 20 years uh since i was in the seal teams and and  i used to miss it a lot you know but like you i'm. i'm in a good place now and i really enjoy what  i'm doing and and i think what we're doing here. is really important and so i don't know if it  really makes me miss them that much sometimes.

i miss the feeling but i will say when i look at  your art you know that you've done of me those two. pieces it it takes me like right back to that very  moment i can remember exactly what we were doing. both on that rooftop and i can remember exactly  what we were doing when we were in that cop market. so it just it just reminds me of good  times you know yeah good times hard times.

it's kind of like a whole slew  of emotions and memories and. and just a in the snap you go back  yeah yeah you know and it's it's. it's really cool all what i would say the emotion  is is is it's all good yeah you know it's i'm. it was a good time in my life but it was  a different time in my life yeah exactly i. think that's something that a lot of guys struggle  with maybe they don't struggle with it as much as.

you hear that a lot right i miss i miss the guys  i miss the community but at the same time the. the same guy that's saying that also chose  to leave the community right for a reason and. there's there's a lot of different reasons behind  i think everybody's stories a little bit maybe a. little bit different there's i'm sure there's  similarities on a lot of fronts but when you.

make that decision guys aren't doing it lindsay  nilly like they know what they're leaving behind. so i miss the guys i miss the community i miss  the camaraderie and joking around i miss working. with that kind of team but i'm i'm i'm happy  man i'm glad i'm i go i'm glad i left good you. know so i'm happy to hear that since we're on  the subject before we dive into your backstory. i think that is something that a lot of guys  i think in myself included uh when i got out. it wasn't just traumatic experiences and and all  that kind of stuff and the addiction to adrenaline.

but you're also you're operating at the highest  level and and there's a lot of with with that. comes a lot of external influence from you know  people in society as a whole i mean they make tv. shows about what we used to do seal team you know  they make movies about what we used to do and and.

people just respect that level of where we  were at so much that it kind of uh it kind. of gets to you you know kind of it kind of gets  to you and when you leave it it's there's almost. like this worry that it's like how am i going to  reach the level that i was at and and in another. aspect of life that's not necessarily as an  operator and and i think you know we've both.

found it you've found it through your art which  is i keep saying it but it is [ __ ] amazing. and and i found it through this show and and and  well that's it the show you know and uh and so it. i think that that plays a big role in  some of the stress that goes on after. the lead would you agree with that yeah  finding purpose yeah i think to the man and.

they have a bunch of programs now for seals  other soft guys getting out of the community. to kind of reintegrate them into the the business  world or whatever world they're kind of interested. in you know kind of helping them to transition  and finding what they're interested in and i think. almost the man the hardest the hardest spot thing  not to the man but most men the hardest thing they. find is not their work ethic or their ability to  do it do a good job at something it's how do you.

find fulfillment and purpose in something outside  of the teams because because you leave and you. want to have passion about some other job as much  as you had about the day that you knew that you. wanted to be a navy seal right and you feel like  i'm le i feel like called to leave the teams i. should have have that for something else but it  just doesn't it doesn't happen and it's hard to.

pinpoint so but we i mean i have my own journey  with that you have yours i'm sure everybody has. their own thing their own stuff but i'm i'll  get into the details of mine and yeah when. we get to that point in the interview if you want  perfect yeah well let's start the interview sweet. so you know kind of how we want to do it  is start with childhood get into the seal. teams get heavy into your combat experience  with isis i can't wait to dive into that um.

i haven't really explored that with anybody  we did a little bit with eddie gallagher but. you have a lot of experience dealing with isis  and and i can't wait to dive into that and. because i didn't fight them like you did it was  the old school enemies uh when i was in and then. you know isis developed and then into your  transition and and to the arts so your stuff. let's start with where where'd  you grow up the very beginning. when i was the before time when i was speckling my  father's eye little laughs yeah just a wee little.

ad well uh i was born into a military family my  father was a army huey pilot and he flew in panama. and desert storm desert shield in the late 80s  early 90s and so as a young kid my dad was gone a. lot and i grew up with just him kind of in and out  but definitely i remember looking up to him coming. back and his flight jacket you know as like i  remember five four or five years old or something.

and during some mission i've i don't really know  the details but there was some kind of malfunction. in his engine had a hard landing destroyed his  back and he got out my father felt kind of called. towards you know missions or or some higher  calling and he ended up going to seminary um. to be a pastor and while he was at seminary uh  my family felt called to go to southeast asia.

how old were the oceans this time i want to  say when he started seminary i must have been. six probably was he religious before that he  was okay so it wasn't from a specific event. that he had no no yeah he was he was religious  before that but he would tell you even like. he he wanted to do some kind of missions work  but he was the the missions organizations.

that he was trying to work for weren't  hiring young men that weren't married. so he's like you know what god just give me give  me five years to do it to join the military or. something and he'll admit like that is be joined  out of like kind of anger and selfishness and. but you know ultimately well like his story's  completed everybody he ended up going getting out. going back in the chaplaincy and um back in the  army just retired out of the army so yeah crazy um.

that answer your question  yeah so kind of going back. going to seminary we do like these family meetings  every night you know after dinner time we'd get. together and i remember my mom and dad sitting  down guys your dad and i are thinking about. going to southeast asia and moving out there and  helping some people i'm like that sounds kind of. cool they're like nobody's going to speak  our language we're gonna be the only people.

like us there it's like okay like it'll be  dangerous like i like danger that sounds exciting. and uh you know i'm completely naive i don't  know what any of this means and uh like the. food will be different i'm like okay i kind of  like foreign food and uh and so far and so far. like so you know we don't want this just to be  a decision about us i have an older brother a.

little sister like if you guys if this isn't  something that you guys think that you'd want. to do like we we don't want to do it but we  want this to be a kind of a family decision. and i'm thinking this sounds just  like tarzan you know like this is. like i am going to be you know mowgli wandering  around the bush like pet tiger like toucan on my. shoulder or something i don't know and uh of  course you know like a little kid like you.

tell me how we're gonna move over to this place  that sounds awesome you know and so of course. a month later my parents come in hey guys what do  you like have you guys thought about that stuff. and i'm like a man little sister yeah i think  that's that's a good world you know older brother. like we want to do it so we're like all right  we're gonna do it and so at age seven about to. turn eight we moved to southeast asia and it was  so cool dude it was awesome childhood the kind of.

stuff that we were doing a lot of it looking back  it's kind of crazy at my career field now but a. lot of it was just going out into villages mapping  villages that were not documented or mapped. doing population like czech checking populations  roads in and out routes like backpacking routes. to these villages and then bringing in medical  supplies dental supplies to some of these villages.

and so as a kid you know i'm out backpacking with  my brother and my sister and my mom and small. teams you're out there doing the great stuff with  with my family yeah how cool is that so at a young. at a young age my family and my brothers and  sisters we were all kind of forced to adopt. a calling that was like pretty high level right  because what we were doing was definitely not like.

not actually legal and the the government was not  very pro what our mission was that makes sense and. and i remember police raids on our house um  really searching i remember our lights being. wire tapped and going into hotel rooms and  then being wired staying at different places. so it was it was just it was an environment where  just starting out like as we as we were about to.

leave you learn as a kid not to say certain words  right like you somebody asked what your parents do. you have a cover like you you say something  else right and uh and people would test you. and these like these we go to like a little  training camp people would random people. come up to you in the lunch line like hey  what are your what do your parents do and.

you know if you messed up you somebody told your  parents parents came talk to you and kind of guide. you and train you through this because you get  over there and you get wrapped up for some of. the stuff that you're doing it's like espionage  yeah and so that was kind of kind of my childhood. starting out at eight to ten so at eight years old  you're learning how to live a cover story yeah man. how crazy is that it wasn't it wasn't all  that dude it was it there was a lot of fun.

my father was a great outdoorsman and he was a  hunter but guns and firearms are illegal here. so my brother and i are making like blow dart  guns and crossbows to try to go out and hunt and. really the only thing in our environment is one of  those things from that tv show like rodents like. rodents of unusual size r-o-u-s-r-o-u-s you know  what i'm talking princess bride i haven't seen oh.

geez princess bride the movie yeah yeah you know  the movie like the giant rats that attack and. eat people like that was the only animal we could  hunt out there was just like these huge huge rats. and so my bro dude we got very resourceful  and we went full windage we had blow dart guns. we were setting snares and uh we were catching  these rats and we got like really good at it and. it got to the point i think in like the span of  like three or four months we'd killed like 200.

plus rats they got so good like we got good that  like the local government was hearing how good. we were and came to ask if we could go in and and  help clear out some rats from the dude in like the. capitol bro wow yeah it was sick and our courtyard  was like lined with skins you know we were like. putting them on stretch racks stretching  out these rats yeah dude we went full and. weird it was like lord of the flies meets.

something i don't know so how many how many  americans were there that was just you guys. um when we first moved there it was us and i  think there was one other family um american. family that was located not like in the same  area but like out in another in another village. so where were you guys passing information  to then if you were mapping these. these villages and and documenting population and  where does that information go uh so these are.

like kind of details that i wasn't really privy  to but i know that they had like their own like. people would come in country and visit and you'd  essentially it could be word of mouth letters or. i think the internet was kind of around back then  so they had some kind of way to pass information i. remember internet being in this like very infancy  my dad having a computer and okay and doing some. of that stuff so i don't know what like if they  were at vpns or what that looked like back then.

do you know where supplies came from uh smuggled  in country smuggled yep a lot of them what was the. cover so um dude it was like random people would  drive stuff in uh different rat lines a lot of it. was just like bibles little tracks in in the in  the local language and one of the in the village. that we lived in a lot in a lot of these places  different villages have different dialects so a.

lot of what one of the families was doing was just  trying to learn the language so that they could. translate the bible into into their language that  people could actually have and read a bible so. that's kind of what that looks like or you know it  could just be a medical office and sometimes they. could come in under you know they were like doing  medicine and in a village nobody really cares but. you do medicine pull somebody's tooth and they'd  be like why why are you here like what are you.

doing my own government doesn't do this for me  you know yeah well you know we believe that jesus. loved you so much that he came and died for you  and he taught us to love god and to love people. this is just our way of loving you you know they'd  be like okay bye thanks for the tooth pull or they. could be like tell me more about this jesus yeah  interesting i didn't realize that i mean i've.

heard a lot of people that you know that go on  the missions and stuff and i didn't realize it. was that you were that embedded i kind of thought  it was just a well-groomed well-greased machine. you know i didn't realize it was that's  cool yeah i and i debated when i was first. kind of jotting down all these notes i was  like i can just talk openly about it all. and then i went on i said surely somebody else  has written a book or talked about this stuff.

the details and i googled it and i'm looking  at the area that i lived in and all the images. are like of old dead people and they're in black  and white so it's a very secretive community and i. i mean i just grown up kind of taking it for  advantage i guess i i didn't really realize how. quiet like they all were right that's very  interesting yeah and i don't i don't think. it's always that case for every group i know some  countries are more open to it than others like.

i lived in thailand you could openly practice  your religion you know they had churches there. that you could go to in the open but where i  was it was definitely like can't say christian. we don't say missionary what was the primary  religion there where i was living yeah uh buddhism. buddhism okay yeah so how long did you do  that did was it from eight to eighteen uh.

yeah i came back for college you went  to college after yeah after the mission. what were you studying that i studied  in international relations first yeah. we can go into that we can go to that  a little bit but so going from there. um to that i had an incident where me and my  sister were racing i was running back to the house. there the the door to kind of like the compound  that i was living one in was there's like a glass.

door and you know those push bars that like lock  yeah you know what i'm talking about is one of. those i pushed pushed on the door with my left  hand my at the same time my sister we were like. dead sprint kind of stepped on the back of my shoe  and i slid forward and my hand went through the. glass door i grabbed the glass ripped my hand  out looked down and my hands just split open.

and i think my parents at the time the town had  just gotten a washing machine or something so. they were going to check it out see if they  could buy it and immediately i'm just like. look at my sister i'm like this is bad you  know i go in unfortunately there were two. nurses that were visiting a couple that were  that were there and they came out right when it. happened dude and he immediately saw just blood  like cover him down my arm he fortunately got.

a cloth on it started applying pressure to  it we ran out into the local hospital there. and the medicine there wasn't very advanced so i  remember them saying word had gotten to my parents. they came met us at the hospital they were kind  of like cleaning it the doctors were assessing it. doctors told my parents hey like we don't have  medicine to put him to sleep so we're gonna have. to do this under what's like local anesthesia or  you just numb the area like we're gonna have to.

put him under local anesthesia and we're gonna  have to do this like why he's awake and dude. they pulled out like the this wooden cork dowel  put it in my mouth i had like a band go around. my neck back on the other side they put like a  little oxygen in my nose yeah and we got on the. table he opened it up dude it's just like arterial  bleeding squirting out of my hand and i pass out.

and i come to in the surgery i'm yelling  and screaming dude and i look down and i see. this guy's pulling on like this white thing on  my wrist and i'm seeing my fingers moving like. that he's like pulling on my like ligaments  and tendons and stuff messing with stuff. and i look at my mom my mom's in this  she's in the room with me i'm like mom. and i'm just out of like is it  my right hand or my left hand.

she's like it's your left hand she said  oh i can still draw you know and uh. pass out wake up bleed i just see  blood all over a towel i'm like. mom my mouth is so dry am i gonna  die from this she's like i don't know. you know like how hard must that  have been from my mother sorry.

damn how old were you 10 10 years  old 10 years old so i wake up. it's like wrapped up in this cast i just remember  my mouth just being so dry it's just like water my. dad comes over he's like buddy hey here's some  water you know gets me some water he's like hey. don't worry we're gonna get yeah like we're going  back we're going somewhere we got good doctors. it's like what happened i don't know like that was  not cool you know yeah and so it's like we got a.

plane you know we're gonna get you we're gonna  fly you out to hong kong they have really good. doctors they're gonna take another look at this  thing it's like it's not over you know and uh. fly out to hong kong they open it  back up make sure everything's good. it cut the artery and like some of the  ligaments and stuff so fix up some of that stuff. because of that i needed like a little bit of  rehab so we hung out in hong kong for a bit.

and my family's like you know  maybe maybe we could start. getting our kids in the school system getting them  socialized with some other kids it might be good. break for them so they're looking at kind  of international schools around the area. and they decided on penang malaysia and so  we moved out to malaysia and i went to an. international school there and that it was  really cool very tropical on a little island.

and a good community lots of canadians uh you  know just people from all over malaysia used to be. um british territory so there's a lot of  british influence it's very modern and. this school that i was going to is just kind  of a melting pot just all sorts of people. they spoke english there which was  great and then 9 11 happened and.

um malaysia has a heavy population of muslims  and i remember seeing you know the tower. my uncle calls it's like hey he was in the  country at the time uncle calls he's like. hey tell your dad turn on the tv turn it on  tower's on fire i'm like dude what is that. why are there buildings on fire i think i'm  in sixth grade or something yeah sixth grade. and my brother is watching he's like that's a  terrorist attack like what what are terrorists.

you know and he's kind of like they're people  that like you know kind of just described it. like a tenure i don't really remember uh and  right then boom the next hour hits i'm like. i gotta tell my teacher she's an american  and it's like caller i'm like hey miss tyus. look at the news there's a terrorist attack  and uh she turns it on she's like oh my.

and because of the muslim population and  our school being an international school. immediately we started getting bomb and terrorist  threats on our school and so our schools started. getting bombed bomb and tears threats at the  school so our school shut down for a week. and they were kind of assessing the situation  the embassy was kind of like talking to you.

know everybody was kind of like trying to figure  out what what happens next yeah and i remember. school opening back up and this  kid coming up to me like hey justin. dude there's marines here is that what like  is that like the army you know he's like no. he's a canadian kid like no marines man they're  like you know i've grown up overseas i know like. army can navy my grandpa was navy but i  didn't really know too much about the military. he's like no they're like over there i went over  went over to him i'm like sir why are you here.

he's got his american flag patch  on his shoulder and he's like. god i think he's kind of like a dip in i don't  know what it is at times like you american kid. and i said yes sir and he's like  america's you is for me what did i do. i didn't do anything he's like no i said a lot  of people don't like us buddy i said i'm here.

sorry it's funny because this stuff doesn't  hit you when you're a kid like you're like. oh cool it's like i'm here in case you need  to be rescued damn dude they were doing like. maritime ops because my school was located on  the beach like they were doing maritime hops like. doing dry runs on the beach and getting ready  in case they ever needed to pull americans out. and i just remember thinking they care about  me they don't even know me why do i mike this.

place was owned by british the british aren't here  there's canadians here the canadians aren't here. malaysian government's not here americans that  means something right yeah so immediately dude. i'm like i'm fired up dude i'm like oh i love  being an american you know the marines are here.

like talk to my grandma next time on phone like  grandma i want you to send me anything that's. america i want american flags on american t-shirts  you know and i'm like so freaking proud because. like these dudes didn't know me and they were  willing to risk their lives to come rescue me you. know a little six-year-old and it's funny because  like back then i remember being like super proud. but now i get like i get choked up because it's  so it's like you know i'm proud of that and uh.

until my grandma sends me a box you know it's like  american flag t-shirts little flags that you wave. and i stick one in my backpack and go into class  canadian teachers like justin come here yes ma'am. she says did you see the memo that i don't know  if this accent is terrible she's like you see the. memo school put out did your parents get that i  said i don't know it's like oh [ __ ] it's saying. that you need to be careful wearing paraphernalia  that has your country and that says where you're.

from and i'm like i look down and it's like  american flag and it says these colors don't run. underneath it you know i'm like can i have that  she said yeah they go home to your parents take. it home to my dad i'm like dad my teacher says  that i can't wear stuff with american flags on. it you know he's like give me that he looks at it  he's like all right here's the deal you don't wear. it out in town but you wear as much stuff as you  want between home and school you know i was like. yeah like america you know you don't really care  like i'm just stoked um so that was malaysia after.

a couple years living there i mean how long did it  take for that to die down or did it ever die down. i remember like for months after like talking  the school was doing contingencies for if. something happened i remember like building  weapons with my friends and like storing them.

around the school you know or thing like dude if  somebody comes we're not going to the basketball. court like they want us to you know we're like  we're going to the tree line we're going to create. this baseball bat like it's like dude we were  coming up with all sorts of stuff we're going. to steal baseball bats from the gym and then we're  gonna get like nails we're gonna stick them in the. baseball bats and we're planting weapons around  the school you know like we're gonna go out into. the trees and we're gonna like like we're getting  out of school we're not hanging out here you know. and you're just talking you're talking trash  and making plans you know dreaming as a kid.

and i think it died down you get comfortable  and you kind of lose track of time. and you kind of forget a  little bit of that stuff but. i want to say like my whole last year it was kind  of in the back of everybody's mind everybody was. like from that point on i remember in malaysia  just being a lot more alert and being a lot more. aware of my surroundings and it wasn't so much  anymore about the government it was just about.

ev like more suspicious about everybody yeah so  the your whole outlook just changes on the entire. population now it's not just government officials  or people wearing uniform or certain buzzwords. because i'm a white face in a place where  there aren't a whole lot of white faces right. and that's you're instantly a target that is your  question yeah so from there we i think we lived.

there for like three years and then i moved back  to our previous house and after so long on the. mission field you're you get uh it's called like  furlough so depending on the amount of time that. you spent you either get six months or a year and  so my family piece of the amount of time we spent. we were granted a year back in the states to go  back and this is my freshman year in high school. for some reason we went to some small town  in alabama and i was so excited because i'm.

going back to america and i'm i'm pumped  to be there you know back on the homeland. i can say christian i get to go to church i get to  worship in public i can talk about anything i want. in america and we're all on the same team right  and i get to public school and i'm bullied. you know and and i remember thinking  like dude we're on the same team you know. it's like what the like what on earth it's like  you're you're an american i'm an american like why.

why don't we value each other why don't we  like have compassion for one another like what. are you picking on me for because i'm  smaller than you you know and i from dude. i hate bullies right and i promise i  remember leaving after my final year. just being like if i ever see that [  __ ] and i can i'm gonna stop it right.

so my parents you know they. they see kind of like that that that  that experience like affected me. and they're like you know maybe like secluding  him and like getting him alone isn't necessarily.

the best thing like putting  him back in that environment is. the best thing maybe we like should get him back  in an international school that would be good for. him when we moved back and so when i moved to  thailand i went to boarding school in thailand. my parents kind of went out in the mission field  and i lived away from them for about a year. and i got in a little bit of trouble with the  school i just felt like i had like a lot of. mobility and freedom in my youth and the school  system was like very controlling and manipulative.

and i didn't jive well with it so my parents like  this actually this is not a good environment for. him maybe we'll just move to thailand for a little  bit and and we'll kind of finish out our time. in the mission field here until he goes  like our kids are all off in college. and then uh i went to college you met your wife  there right oh yeah yeah sorry very important part.

yeah so my wife's family was missionaries to india  and her story was kind of like the same as mine. they kind of sent her to the same boarding  school in thailand and we kind of crossed paths. we were completely different social groups and we  didn't really interact until like my senior year. and we dated our senior year and then ended  up going to the same college just because the. college that i went to had a special program for  missionary kids because our parents made nothing.

they pretty much give you a nice scholarship  as long as your parents are serving overseas. and so we both kind of ended  up in the same spot because of. like the financial issue and i knew that i  wanted to serve but i just didn't know what that. looked like or like what that at what capacity my  father was very adamant about me going to college.

i was interested in enlisting but from a young age  i was like hey man i think it's i think it'll be. really good for your your growth and your maturity  for you to go to college first kind of give you an. opportunity to figure out the states again and  then kind of make a plan when you're doing that. and with the college with the with the scholarship  me not paying for anything it seemed like a. like a pretty good deal you know and  so i went to college in virginia and.

i was i was looking at the degrees  just studying international relations. and i was i remember like not being a good  student and i really didn't want to study anymore. it wasn't really a good environment for me because  i knew i just wanted to join the military and i. didn't know how some of these these things that  i was studying was gonna like really translate.

and i'm naive of course but i know  it all it all has its has a purpose. but i went to i was talking to my dad kind  of wrestling with us like dad i kind of. really want to just join the military he's  like well dude why don't you look at rotc. i said oh what what is that is it it's like he's  like it's an officer training so you go to net. you do like college classes you do some like  military training while you're in school.

you can contract and they'll even pay you and then  when you finish your commission officer i was like. that's sick so i went onto the you know website we  had army rotc like dude i'm gonna try out army rtc. and started the classes and before before i  joined i'm looking at all these jobs in the. army and i'm like special forces  you know this this looks like.

this looks like my childhood you  know it just seems like a perfect fit. with the language the foreign experience like this  might really work but i was a terrible student. i wasn't in good shape i wasn't an athlete. and i remember going into like it was like the  first day or whatever you know there's a ton of. other students and them going around it's like  hey you know we'd like to get to know you guys.

everybody if you wouldn't mind  stand up and tell us about. why you're joining the military why  you want to be a part of the military. and i have nothing against like if you sign  the line and you join and you served in this. nation's military absolutely honorable you know  like like i'm freaking proud of you but when most. of these classmates of mine stood up it was oh i  want the job experience i need the college money.

it's like i i think that this career will  help me when i get out in the business world. and i think maybe two or two or three other guys  that were in my class with me just said i want. to do good things for my country and i want to do  bad things to bad people you know i was like shoot.

man where where are all my people at you know like  where's my community because i don't think this is. i don't really connect like that you know  i only like i just want to do bad things. to bullies right i want to find  bad people that hurt good people. so i was like all right well maybe  i i like i just really gotta push. and try to be special forces and and  the more i'm like looking into it and.

i'm looking at the rating system that the  the program was built off of i'm like dude. even if i get the job the chances of me becoming  an officer in that community slim to none. you know and i'm like i don't want to bet that  it's like i think i might just have to enlist and. and it got to the point where my father and  mother were coming off the mission field so. my scholarship was going to drop so i knew i  had three options one i go into massive debt.

finish my degree try to commission somehow two  i could get a scholarship with rotc they'd pay. for the rest of my schooling and i'd risk it to  try to go sf three i get out and i just enlist. and i remember summer break during the  summers in college i was a raft guide and. uh actually right here in tennessee on the pigeon  river oh really yeah yeah and so i'd go out and.

rap god well one summer um i was linking  up with one of my buddies before i went out. in alabama he's like dude and i was telling him my  situation i'm kind of looking at you know and he's. older than me he's like oh man you're looking  at that he's like you got to read this book. it's like what what is it he's like it's  called lone survivor it's about navy seals said.

i think i've heard of them like navy  seals i just had not like navy was. never an option it's like i think i remember  like somebody talking about navy seals once. and uh he's like oh dude you got to  read this book and it's like okay and. and i went i went he he gave me his copy of the  book and i just like downed it and i was like dude. the way the way that these men compose themselves.

freaking the bravery how tough danny dietz was  right axelson murph latrell dude it like like. it's like that's tough you  know that's what men are i said. and then you know of course you're like what  do you have to do to do this so you google like. navy seal training what is that and then you  see the training like that's the this is the. hardest thing in the world and i'm like if it's  the hardest and the toughest that means that the.

men that want to be there are the men like like  they're like me right i said after the strongest. then they win the most all right and i was  like they can they can kill the most bullies. and so that was there and like that seed was  planted and uh so i i went back to college it.

was kind of like my last semester to decide and i  was telling some of my classmates and i remember. being in a car and they're like everybody's  talking about what they want to do in the army. and it was it was the first time i  kind of verbalized it to this group. and this girl's like how about you hughes what  do you want to do it's like i think i want to be. a seal or special forces and she looks at  me she looks down at me kind of scrolls me.

she's like you know that's really hard right  and i was like i want to be a navy like my dis. the point was made like now i want that's all  i want to do like i'm going to do this you know. it's like team america he's like i promise  i will never die right like dude i was like. like f what everybody else thinks like i'm  gonna do everything i can to do this job.

and so i started training that semester and  i'm talking to my brother who's out of college. now he's raft guiding at the uh in charlotte  the u.s national white water center like dude. i've signed up for classes for next semester my  senior year it's like but i'm not i'm not going. i said i'm gonna list i'm talking to a special  forces recruiter i've been i know that there's. like like seal contracts now i think i'm gonna  try it out i'm gonna like you know i'm gonna i.

want to talk to them and see what the best option  what they think the best option is for me and uh. he's like dude come on down to charlotte you could  be a raft guard at the white water center and uh. and you gotta figure it out man hang out with me  like all right cool because he was looking at the. intelligence community and and going the officer  route and either the navy like preferably the navy. he was kind of leaning to and i was like all right  yeah we can go talk to the recruiter together.

and so i remember walking in to the recruiting  office i'm like all right first i'm gonna go. into the the army office office i'm gonna talk  to them i'm gonna go talk to the navy office. walk in the door army office is on the right  navy office is on the left army office is closed. hard left in the navy office dude and i never  looked back no good yeah my brother's in there. chatting with them and uh i'm kind of like  sitting in the back on my phone waiting my turn.

and she's like yeah honestly man is it gm  one ramos freaking awesome like if you had. a like a recruiter that was cool gm one  ramos was like just a character and uh. he's like we're not really like recruiting like  officers right now it's like frankly like he's. like honestly like what the military really  want like what the navy really really wants. it's like seals eod and i was like oh that's  what my brother wants to do and he's like.

you know look at you come here you want to be  named seal so i'm interested yeah i'd like to. talk about it it's like you swim so i'm okay it's  like you run like yeah i want to be in navy seal. or you know talk about it and uh he's like all  right let's uh let's do the pst tomorrow i said. okay he's like you want to do it looked at my  brother remember i was like yeah i'll try it.

and so dude we go to do the psd and. i had been swimming but i don't  know if it was the pressure. or the tides weren't right but  i felt like i was going to drown. like it was miserable experience it was like  a total gut check for me i was i mean you can. ask my wife what i was i'm a skinny dude you know  and i'm 140 pounds at this point just tiny and uh.

and i pat i passed everything but it hurt right  i was like dude i suck you know i'm like trash. and i'm like hey man listen like you  kind of kissed me on the first date. it's like i need to like go train a little bit  for this if i'm gonna really take it seriously. and i got in the car with my brother  and i was like dude that sucked. and he's like yeah my brother's like  dude i kind of want to do this too.

no [ __ ] yeah and he's like he's like should we  do that like should we do this and i said dude. it'll be hard he's like yeah i know he said no  it's going to be really hard i know it's like. it'll be dangerous like i know it's like nobody's  gonna speak our language yeah the same deal and uh. the food's gonna be different and  and he's like let's do it i said.

let's let's be navy seals and that was like rocky  montage number one right every day i'm in the pool. we're on the versa climber you know we're lifting  weights trying to get into shape and then you know. end up getting our contracts shipping off to buds  both of you guys shipped off the bus together same. boot camp division same buds class get the hell  out of here yeah so your older brother just on.

a whim decided in that moment like yeah [ __ ] it  i'll give this a shot no i mean he he had the same. sense that i did right and loyalty to our country  and a desire to do great things for this nation. and and he wasn't sure what capacity he was going  to do it at i knew that i wanted to be some sort. of soft yeah um and i knew that i was drawn  towards the training of the seal teams i didn't. do a whole lot of research i knew i really like  that was very appealing to me that it was so hard.

and he he was interested but it wasn't something  that like for years he had been kind of working up. towards to go into that community and so yeah it  was just kind of like you want to do it it's like. yeah let's go damn full sin man that  is a hell of a childhood to buds. story wow i totally wasn't expecting any of  that really i mean there's nothing out there.

on you i could have researched  you know and uh you're you know. you'll appreciate this you're a black you're a  blank canvas dude so you know but see what you. did there but hey before we uh get into  buds let's take a quick break right on. what's going on patreon.

join me on vigilance elite patreon  for our live video teleconference. all right so we had a nice little break there  yeah let's get into you and your brother are. getting ready to show up to buds yep so rocky  one montage done going to the fight right we're. going to buds together ship off to boot camp  and boot camp was nothing like i expected.

uh fortunately you know my brother's  just a couple racks away from me. so starting out my time in the navy it was it  was awesome just having like that touch point. right at the end of the day we could always  debrief debrief each other and be like. totally [ __ ] lied to us this totally sucks like  this this is way worse than what we thought it was. going to be like i think this instructor cadre  is like beating like abusing us like it was it.

was like dark you know we went to a dark place i  don't know maybe it was just completely out of our. element but it just wasn't what i expected from  boot camp and um you know i joke it's like dude. i would rather do but again then boot camp it was  just so freaking stupid and monotonous and i think. i'll like a lot of times when i bring that up to  students they're like yeah boot camp's stupid you.

know it's like i don't know maybe it's just like  the creature comforts that you're giving away and. at least in buds i know like on the weekend well  you see the a little bit yeah maybe you try me. you see the i know what you mean you're there  you're there to go it's almost like purgatory dude. you know what i mean like that's you're there to  go and train to become the most elite operator in. in the country yeah and you're learning how to  iron [ __ ] clothes and the most nervous i've.

ever been is writing my name on the back of my  t-shirt yeah you know what i mean it's like yeah. i think that's like the main thing is like the  whole time you're thinking about this other thing. you're looking for something and i'm getting  chewed out because my shirt doesn't have. the perfect wifi you know what i mean and  i know it's like attention to detail stuff. but it it's it was just like a limbo yeah  you're looking it's like a means to an.

end you're looking for like some something  that has anything to do with being an operator. even just not even being an operator anything  to do with combat and it doesn't it just doesn't. come so you're not getting anything to feed  that motivation the only motivation you have. is holy [ __ ] if i quit this is life yeah and  yeah and i mean yeah exactly and then you know.

you're doing some kind of workouts with the  dive motivators and stuff but you're kind. of getting out of shape you're not really doing  good workouts you're not really eating good food. um and so you know you go through boot camp  checking the buds and the floodgates open. you know you all of a sudden you're there you're  like dude the grinder's right there look there's. helmets on the grinder you see your first brown  shirt it's like dude it's all real you know this.

isn't just some book or some documentary like this  crap's real and then you see the blue and gold's. the instructor's staff and like holy [ __ ]  and uh i remember doing my first surf torture. with my brothers like at the end of the line  and you know they're always like head back. head back they want your ears to fill up with sand  and water and i was like all right head back i'm. gonna do perfect you know this is gonna be perfect  and i got up dude and i thought i was going to.

throw up all over the place like you get up and  you're like stumbling you know and you're like. everybody's like what the [ __ ] was that  like i look at my brother and we both look. at each other like not chill like that was  not like not what i expected but coming back. it was he was always a touch point yeah you  know he's always like that continuity for me. and we went through in doc together the  instructor said i thought i was funny.

because my brother's like a foot shorter than  me he's my older brother like hughes and hughes. brothers in a buds class together what they let  you do this and we're like ooh yeah you know. like you guys are swim buddies and dive buddies  and you're going to be together all the time like. we never want to see you guys apart no [ __ ] they  put you guys together together swim buddies and. i'm i'm faster than my brother in the pool faster  than him on runs but dude he was like hurting.

injury-wise and boot camp and stuff and i  was like feeling fresh and then we got to. buds and the rolls switched he was like  fresh and my legs are like falling apart. and i'm like bro what happened so all of a sudden  he's feeling good on these runs and i'm like. i might have to take this one a little bit slower  bro but we were on a swim one day we're swimming.

the instructors circling us in this jet seat ski  hurry up you're not gonna make the time hurry up. and uh i'm like josh hurry hurry up man he's  right behind me he's kind of like on my heels. like dude we cannot i do not want extra buds  right and i'm freaking i'm tired the night before. uh at the end of the day you do grinder cleaners  right where you sweep all the sand off the grinder. you clean up the instructor's office uh you  get everything ready for the next day and.

two students had been caught walking as they were  taking out trash and so an instructor came out. he saw it he's like guess what tonight you're all  gonna be writing i will not walk while at basic. underwater demolition school 1000 times and so  we're cherry-rigging all these pins together like. every student has to write this a thousand times  damn dude it was brutal so by the time i finished.

writing because i had five pens together and  i was writing it down i had it was like five. minutes to muster close my eyes wake up sleep in  my put my boots on go downstairs get ready for the. swim so i'm like pooped bro like josh i don't  want extra bucks today it's week one wednesday. like you better we better not fail so  we're kicking him kicking him kicking. he's kicking he's kicking we get past the  finish line i think we're like the fifth.

swim bear calls out our time and we're like  five minutes under the the time that we needed. nice you know like high five and he's like looking  at me he's like dude i think i'm done i'm like. what do you mean you think you're done it's  like i think i want to do something else. it's like no no no no no let's talk about it  at lunch i said just wait we're gonna we're.

gonna do this we got a little admin time and  then we're gonna we can talk about at lunch. and uh he comes over he didn't finish his writing  assignment the night before he's like some. instructor on the ballroom if you didn't  finish your writing assignment last night. report for you know report to the  goon squad whatever and so i'm like. and he's like goes over does his little extra  buds i go back start changing on my wetsuit.

and then uh get to lunch and i'm like i'm just  sitting down with him like all right dude like. really think about this he's like listen man  he's like this isn't what i've always wanted. he's like this was kind of a means to end for  me he's like i wanted this so that i could do. something else when i get out and he's like i  don't necessarily have to do this to do that. and i was like dude i i get it dude this is  hard you know it's like i got nothing else.

it's like you go i'm gonna stay for one more  evolution i'll see you later and so he disappeared. and uh we go back to the pit. go upstairs call my mom and dad guys josh quit  like wow how are you you know like i'm okay.

i think i'm okay i'm a little bummed  okay hang in there you're good. and uh this is like the first time in my  whole life that there's no more family right. my brother was gone parents couldn't help  it was me and i had to make a choice right. all right i'm gonna do another  evolution walk downstairs.

and uh three of my good buddies all made it  all who made it they put their arms around me. they say don't worry use we're your brothers now. and uh they're like let's go do another evolution. yeah dude went out never thought  about it never thought about quid. it's like from then on dude i was like this is  it doesn't matter what happens anymore i'm all in.

did that affect your guys's relationship that was  a good yeah i mean there was definitely you know. we joke the instructor staff afterwards is like  going to make an awkward thanksgiving for the. hughes bros you know and like coking and joking  and it didn't it didn't because no because my. brother was the guy he's like yeah dude freaking  ate the cold wasn't for me and he owns it yeah. yeah totally owns it and uh to me that's one of  like the most annoying things like yeah you know.

my achilles hurt and they told me  pretty much that i had to quit because. because they weren't going to roll me so i quit  are you talking about engines i'm talking about. in general a lot of dudes do that [ __ ] you  know they just like make up reasons for why they. quit and they just don't own it like they have  tons of excuses right you never meet an actual. bud's quitter you just made everybody that got med  dropped dude yes you know yeah and uh and so he's.

not that guy he i mean it's a cool conversation  that we can have and yeah and you know he kind. of reflects back on some of those stories i  mean it's definitely respectable we're stupid. yeah we're still super cool i call that guy every  single day he left chat all the time good i could. see where that could definitely get in the way  but on the other hand he made it it sounds like he. made a very calculated decision and it wasn't you  know i mean he didn't whatever yeah he didn't quit.

in the moment no i mean yeah to an extent right  but uh my brother is definitely one of the dudes. he is undoubtedly one of like the  most intellectual people that i know. he's now an army chaplain and like  to me he's like like levels above.

like wisdom and knowledge and information  that i could ever attain you know so a lot. of times in my life even like this interview  you know i called my brother i'm like hey man. i don't know what i'm going to talk about bro  i was like i don't really know he's like listen. build like a story you know he kind of like talks  me through it he's like this is you know he helps. you navigate some of those like intellectual  challenges that i really struggle with yeah and uh. yeah i mean it doesn't it hasn't really answered  your question it hasn't good it's been pretty.

that's cool it's kind of if anything it's kind of  built us because like we both went our own ways. and it like we didn't have to like piggyback  off each other's careers and there was no like. competitiveness in the team you know what i mean  and uh it's just like dude you did your thing. i'm doing my thing he found his calling yeah he  found his call he wasn't being asleep exactly. nothing wrong with that exactly man and uh  so he had to go back um dude i remember uh.

kind of closing out i guess the buzz portion  that was kind of like the highlight like the. hard part for me of buds but other than that was  like injury stuff i was dealing i remember my. achilles tendon just was like so swollen  and just getting the point where i'm like. i'm i don't know if this can hurt more i think  the next level of pain that i can feel with this.

is like my foot falls off my bone's sticking out  right like i remember running and chasing freaking. eddie gallagher he was one of my instructors  eddie gallagher was one of your inspectors. yeah and he is freaking fast bro  what was he like as an instructor. um he was hard was he he was tough was he he  was a hammer he was the [ __ ] yeah he was a. quiet [ __ ] oh yeah he's the [ __ ] that like  doesn't have to say very much he's the night. shift dude yeah eddie it is the night shift yeah  and i don't see eddie i'm right chasing eddie.

and my ankle's like on fire i'm like dude i'm  just gonna catch him and i'm gonna stay with. him and i'm like i don't care what my tendon  feels like i catch up and i'm like right next. to eddie and get closer and closer and  then i just like kind of looks over oh. he rips off we we circle back you know  and he knows i'm just like kind of being.

a smart ass like just trying to catch up with the  instructor staff and he's like deuce get over here. he's like can't wait to see quit like your  brother and i'm like like i don't know dude. he's like he's just you know he's  getting my head and uh yeah and and so. i ended up having stress fracture like an eight  centimeter stress fracture in my left tibia. after hell week and i've ran it through to second  phase got rolled day one the second phase and um.

rolled back into a future class and finished out  buds i got a question yep you said three guys. after your brother left three guys came and said  border brothers now did they make it oh made it. all teammates every single one of them no [ __  ] yep that's how cool is that that's cool he's. really sick i actually i got to do a uh a driving  school it was like we hadn't seen each other they.

all went east coast and i was a west coast guy and  two of them were at it it was just it was like a. huge reunion you know but i was like dude because  we hadn't connected in so long and uh you know. you end up going to different teams and and you  just kind of drop like you look at your old buds. picture and like i don't know dude i don't know  a lot of i don't have no clue what these people. are doing now yeah it's always cool to reconnect  with them but yeah all of them made it i think. one of them's out now and then the other two  are still in right on crazy right yeah yeah.

so you got any hell week stories before we move on  from buds oh geez hell weak stories man gosh dang. do you i remember there being like weird  stuff that was going on i remember like uh. i remember them playing like  music that was like for children. and just constant baby crying  you know music and we went.

the first day do you know how you get the rollback  word right you're always looking at the rollbacks. like what so what what's this look like what's day  one look like and all the rollbacks have told us. like okay so we're gonna do breakout we're gonna  do log bt you know the base tour or whatever it is. some nerd's gonna be like bass tours on day  three you know i don't know i don't know what. the exact schedule is i'm like okay okay cool  cool i got this and dude it was like breakout.

log pt and then we got our boats and ran down  like i think eight miles to the stick and we. spent like the first three days down with  a stick away from base eating mres and uh. um doing the whole spiel i remember  at one point one of the instructors. like dumping sand on us day one you know we're  like we had won a race and him looking around and.

like saying hey hughes look around in this class  how many people you think are gonna quit it's like. i'm like i don't know man everybody seems pretty  solid and then i'm like but my brother quit so i. have freaking no idea you know like i don't  know bro how many people are gonna make it. through this pipeline but uh i don't know yeah  weird buds where's weird head hell weak stories. yeah well you don't have i don't know  yeah i probably think of something and.

come up with it but it's all blur too right like  you remember bits and pieces i remember dudes i. remember doing what is that one around the world  there was this one kid who's always falling asleep. and then you take your battle and you're like  don't wake up start battling we're in second. place we don't want to freaking lose second place  they're like letting us take a break at the end. and somebody sneaks out and like throw a bag  of the full-size snickers bars in our boat.

we're like all right man listen if you're not  gonna paddle all you have to do is unwrap these. snicker bars and you're gonna feed us right so i  remember like paddling and then just feeling like. a snickers bar like like dragging in my mouth dude  i ate so many snickers bars and i was so pumped. because it was like tasted good one meal finally  tasted good and dude we got to the break and i was.

just dying man my stomach i was just like  curled over i was like too much you know like no. like i'm not eating any more sticker dude my  stomach was so messed up so messed up and then. you know it goes like you're taking dumps in  the surf and you're like how do i poop in the. ocean you know i've never done that before so you  like pull your pants down you're trying to like.

take a dump and the waves in the sand are  like brushing your your butt crack and then. you're like i think i went poop and you look down  there's no turd it's just like sand you're like. where is it like where is that i want to  pull it into my pants dude yeah i don't know. it's just weird stuff it's just a weird time man  yep it's all blur we're moving on yeah sorry so. what team are you going to so when you graduate  yeah uh get down with buds go to i end up getting.

orders to seal team five and right before seal uh  right before checking in that's when my wife and i. got married my wife whom i met in thailand we  kind of talked and she was going to nursing school. i was looking at doing the seal thing she was my  girlfriend at the time i was like i don't want any. distractions you don't need any distractions while  you're going to nursing school i said let's just. like let's not talk for a little bit and  maybe we can link up when all this is done.

you know and so i got rolled kind of started  got a little lonely started texting her and so. rekindled some stuff and when i graduated buds she  was like i'm going to come out and be a nurse in. southern california i said oh well how convenient  and so we started dating again when i was an sdt. decided to just get married um so we got  married right before i checked in i think.

i've just finished here oh dude i i had just  finished here so it was like we did the ftx. and i remember same thing brown shirt uh pass  down like dude how long is this ftx cause it's. like right before christmas break and that's  the only time i can get married you know it's. like the only leave that you're pretty much you  know you're gonna get when you're in training. and he's like oh dude i think it's like you get  you started on monday you finish it on wednesday.

and then you get like a day or two off it's  like i'm pretty sure that's it and dude i. remember being wednesday and watching the sun  go down and being in this like little shell sail. somebody like hosing me down being like son of a  [ __ ] dude my wedding's in two days and i'm still. in this jealous butt naked and uh and dude like we  secured thursday got on a plane friday got married. saturday and i'm having like you know they slap  you around and stuff and i have like bruises on my.

cheek i'm all like skinny and i got a cold because  you know you've been out living in hosed off. woods it's just like you know malnourished so  i get married get orders for steel team five. and then with all my experience and where i lived  like hey i speak this language you know i can help. here like you should learn pashtu i'm like what  the frick is posh do you know they're trying to. send all the seals to language school like this  little sliver in afghanistan you want me to.

learn this language though went to pashtu school  while my platoon was coming back from afghanistan. and they had had a really good deployment in  afghanistan gotten a lot of combat and i was a. new guy coming into a platoon with a pretty great  reputation so you know you just try to be the good. new guy and so yeah that's kind of like where i i  started out at steel team five hopefully that was.

comprehensible yeah i know it kind of bounced  around a bit oh that's good yeah so checked in. seal team five start ult i'm a comms guy  which is uh for those of you who don't know. unit level training um you go into your  unit everybody kind of gets their jobs. some guys get specialty training if there's  bullets that are open up and our platoon's.

performing pretty well and they're like hey you  guys are gonna go to yemen and i'm like oh that's. that's a cool country i think that there's  definitely some bad guys there like we might. actually get to do some work you know and you're  kind of getting hand down and you're you're. learning about who you're going to be working  with and uh we're going to be augmenting with our. platoon is going to be augmenting with development  group and helping with their mission there. and uh and so you know everybody's fired up  to do this deployment what year is this 2014 i.

think i think or 2014 2015. um the way that the  rotation worked it was always like a christmas. and then a christmas off and then a christmas  off on deployment and you know what i mean yeah. i think so so we're there between 2014 going  into 2015. what part of yemen uh we were kind of.

i don't know if i should all right so i don't  know if we go into like the details of like. exact locations because of the guys that we were  working with um but primary mission there was. vehicle interdiction vi and so they're you know  tracking dudes and our job was to train and handle. the yemenis like premier counter-terrorist  unit and so this was probab.

you always hear the stories about expectation  management and expectation management you know. going to it whatever happens happens if you get  to see some action you get to see some action. and you get there and you start kind of seeing  what the op tempo is like and you're like wow i'm. we might not do any good work you know and this  is the first time in my career where i realized. dude there's seals that have never been in combat  yeah you know like there's a lot of people who.

spend their whole careers and maybe get shot at  once right or get to shoot their guns once maybe. so you're like dude i gotta figure out how  i can chase the fight you know you're like i. don't want to miss it you know this is how  long has this war been going on did i miss it. yeah and so this is the first time this is all  connecting with me and and fortunately it wasn't.

an uneventful deployment like a couple the way  that the rotation for our platoon worked with. handling these dudes is they would do there was  kind of like a like a lottery like this week two. dudes are the handlers and then the next week two  other guys are the handlers and if a knot pops off. and you guys get to go like you two are on the  list you're on the you're on whatever chalk and so. you know some of the guys were super fortunate and  got to do an awesome awesome mission handlers for.

yemeni special forces okay yeah so the way that  a lot of these countries like to work it is they. like to put the face of their nation on the  operation so you include them in the operation. sometimes you do the americans do most of  the work and pretty much just try to make. sure that the enemies don't shoot themselves  or us i didn't realize that that was yeah same.

thing with us in iraq and afghanistan as well  i didn't realize they were doing that in yemen. yeah that's uh that was my first deployment  man and honestly like we got rocketed. but you come back and you're like man it was a  good bonding experience with the guys i learned. a lot from working with the guys that we were  working with but it's kind of disappointing like.

i'm kind of disappointed that i didn't get to do  the work that i joined the military to do right. and so you try your best because the way that  the platoons work and the way that the unit. level training cycle works is you know whoever's  the top performer gets to go to whatever the most. dangerous operation the most dangerous theater is  right so i guess the way that trade at works is.

as you're going through all these training  pipeline like these seal training right this. deployment training you do they kind of grade  you and there's whispers and talk i don't i. don't know man it's like all over my head but  they they essentially grade you your platoons. you're like hey this platoonist go here this  platoon is definitely better at the mar op. stuff they'll go to p.i or something and  then you know top performing platoon like. they're going to syria or iraq or yemen  whatever the mission whatever the mission set is.

so. i we start out our platoon i get the opportunity  to go to jtac school joint terminal attack. controller for those of you that don't know what  that is it's uh anytime there's aircraft in the. air not any time but most of the time that there's  a soft component on the ground there's usually a. ground somebody on the ground talking to the to  the aircraft and coordinating while we're seeing.

what the gfc who's the ground force  commander what his intent and what he wants. and telling them essentially what to bomb when  to bomb and where to bomb that make sense yeah um. so i went to j tech school and  it's very cookie cutter it's very. book study heavy you go out to the range it's  sanitary you got your map out got your radio.

you know you can see the aircraft  everything's like very controlled. and essentially the way it works is you kind  of coordinate with them make sure you're both. looking at the same thing there's kind of a  contract that's gender in verbal form and then. you give them permission to strike right with your  gfc's approval ground force commander's approval. so i did the schoolhouse man and did okay i felt  like i did really well but you get to the platoon.

and as we all know like the op tempo  in the platoon is completely different. than how the school house does things and so i  remember we start ult we start uh mobility was. my first block where i was practicing as a primary  jtac for our platoon and dude i was a [ __ ] show. it was a complete dessert like i go in we go into  the sim simulator and fortunately for me man my.

my platoon chief was a very very good communicator  and had a great reputation for being a good jtac. we go into the simulator my first block i'm  like all right i'm going to show them you know. all the things that i've learned in the  schoolhouse you know and you start and they're. you're like oh mortar is coming in and the  simulator is like a huge dome and you got.

like kind of your compass and your tools that you  can use and there's a guy back there pretending. like he's the aircraft and you got your radio  so you just walk it all out right and you can. see okay i'm getting more so here and so you  start like okay i'm gonna get my little map out. i'm like all right and it's like like somebody's  shooting you see them kind of walking towards you. like uh okay so maybe we're gonna i'm gonna focus  on that thing right and it's like somebody else is. shooting at you now and you're like uh which one  do i focus on like this is way more than i knew.

how to handle from what i was learning in the  schoolhouse it was always like so easy like. hey man i want you to hit this building right  here just tell them to blow up that it and like. that was it right and now like the stress was  on and i remember being done dude i'm like sweat. and i feel out of breath and i'm like that was not  chill and i looked back and the instructor cadre. like the trade at goddard was kind of like  rubbing his chin looking at me my platoon. chief was kind of like looking at him and uh i'm  like i am so sorry i was like i am so sorry and uh.

my platoon she's like come on come here he's like  don't worry we're gonna get you up to speed and. rocky montage number two man i start  like it is on the mic eight hours a day. going constantly every single operation like  every training up we're doing i'm doing runs and.

for for me it was one of those things where  in this community i felt pretty comfortable. and confident but it was an extraordinarily  humbling experience just to be like so bad at. something but to have guys again come in and say  like hey man here's how we do things here here's. how you work this here's here's the priority  here and just to have that support system and. such good mentorship in my platoon was extremely  beneficial and i know a lot of guys don't get that.

but i think it's just a testament to how like how  our platoon was formed how my leadership was in. my platoon and uh we'd really built a great family  that was all about bringing everybody up to speed. and making sure like we were as lethal as possible  right eliminating the kill chain to as small. as it needs to be to get bombs on heads that's  awesome and so yeah man they brought me up and uh. you know i remember sitting down he's like  all right man like we're going to iraq.

and our platoon's splitting up you know your  mentor jtech mentor he's like one of my older. guys he's like he's going to be with us and  you're gonna be alone and afraid you know and. he's he said you ready i said yeah he's  like i know you are he said if you have. any problems or questions you come to me i said  okay and um gfc chief it's like the you know.

like the classic before we deploy these are our  expectations like this is this is what it's going. to look like for you and they're like we have full  confidence in you you know and so dude um we start. turning over with steel team one who's currently  deployed to northern iraq they're dealing with. the isis piece chuck keating gets killed during  our turnover and all of a sudden it's like wow.

like seals are dying and we're about to be there  you know this is this has become a lot more real. and so you know for the first time you. you try to not for the first time  you try to manage those expectations. and and train to the highest level right.

but at the same time you're so hesitant  because you don't want to be disappointed. right and it's like how do you pay how do you  pace yourself for that and like how do you do that. you just shoot for the stars man you just  do it do the best you can all the time and. that's what the teams demand of you and so  the whole platoon was in we were ready to go. chomping at the bit and we tried  to maintain our expectations but.

it's impossible for them not to be that  high when you have an enemy like them. yeah you know you're going to the shed now  yeah we feel we we really feel like we are. that's that. you take a quick can we take a quick break. let's do it before we go to iraq and  start war stories let's take a break.

mosul isis take us there foreign  countries it's dangerous now.

yeah so i'll start from right off the bat  initial impressions we kind of work through. the progression of the op tempo and kind  of like how life looked there that cool. so day one i think so the way the flights work  is the platoon's kind of broken up and people. arrive at different times you do turnovers with  your counterparts that's that are in the platoon.

that you're leaving and so being the jtac with my  oic on the first flight out we get in the country. you know check out our house start meeting some of  the guys that we're going to be turning over with. and they say hey sas lives down the road  they want to have a barbecue with you guys. meet you tonight is that sweet it's like i  think they're just kind of like a three day out.

and um like cool yeah we'll head down so  you know we got our guns drive down the road. go over to their house they're like grilling  you know they got like sweet land rovers and uh. they're all just like kick back relaxing just  like this the scene that you'd expect you know. we just start sitting down and talking with  them and they're telling us about their day. and their time on the flop which is the four  line of troops and you know i'm i'm like.

so how'd it go he's like oh mate it was uh  it's pretty good to the v-bitch show up i said. what happens what happens when the v-bit showed up  and it's like well you try to shoot it i said okay. and then what and if you guys had any success  like blowing him up he's like no really. he's like i said so what happens when he  gets close he's like you [ __ ] run mate.

and i'm like look over at my oic and i'm like  we run like is that a is that like a back left. call or like what does that look like if i'm  not training but run run away and uh and dude. i i remember just being like okay this is a  little different than what i exp like expected.

and the way that the battlefield is  set up is more like world war one. than a modern warfare scene that you  would expect seals to be fighting in. uh where we were working with the kurdish forces  who's the peshmerga also referred to them as.

like the pesh for short the pesh had built up a  flot four line of troops and it was essentially. berm and trenches with outposts all along their  territory and then isis had controlled villages. that you know they killed most of  the people or when they moved in. a lot of the people ran away but essentially  these villages were completely deserted.

maybe a couple other families would stay behind  and they had dug in intricate tunnel systems. and built rat lines in and out of these  villages and so when we first came into country. our typical job was to develop understand and find  and fix hopefully kill isis in these villages so.

for instance you go up to the four line of  troops you ride in you know early morning. and you kind of get all your gear  set up get your mortar set up. and then almost every single time you get  up there you start receiving mortar fire. so um the best way i can kind of describe what  that sounds like to people is you get you get.

used to kind of like knowing what what is mortar  and what isn't but you can tell when somebody. launches a mortar it almost doesn't matter how far  away because it sounds like a car door slamming. so you hear car door slam um our sop was like you  know you close your car door you yell car door. so people knew it wasn't an enemy mortar so  you get up to the flot set up your mortar.

launcher puma which is like a um our own isr  little isr platform with a short battery life. what is isr let's grab that can you describe  it essentially it's just uh it's a platform. some of them are armed some are not but it's a  platform with a camera some of them have um flear.

which is white hot red hot it's a drone yeah  it's a lit it's a tiny little cardboard drone. uh isis would call it the cardboard airplane so  whenever they called it out on comms they sent. the cardboard airplane and so we'd throw out our  little drone and start scanning these villages and. just developing a pattern of life and it got to  the point where you start to recognize people you.

start to notice when vehicles come and go start to  notice what buildings they go into and if you're. lucky you start you get right up to the flot  you start getting mortared you identify poo site. hopefully you can get aircraft on station  we can call in a strike it's a good day. or you identify the poo site it's impossible to  get aircraft because they're located somewhere. else and your boys set up their mortars and  you just start like this mortar battle or.

lob 50 cal rounds at them and trying to hit them  but a big struggle is locating an enemy boost. like waterproof side for those sorry i didn't  go into what a poo site is it's just a point. of origin and i get you some i have some pretty  good footage of what that looks like if you want. to run it you can uh you can show and then i can  show like a strike on a pretty sight it's pretty. cool absolutely so look at some of that stuff  too before we go into the those the poo side.

the flop what does that look like  yeah i mean is it like a line of. of coalition forces no so uh it's all pretty  much manned by peshmerga forces okay and then. coalition forces would deploy to different parts  and just support different elements of the flot. so you're always receiving intel like oh this  section of the flot might be you know they might.

push this section of the flop and so we'd go and  reinforce that section of the slot and be ready. so it's a moving line uh it's not it's it's  pretty built up like this they have some nice. structures but there are berms like bulldozers  pushed in sandbags built up it's very like. fortified and it's held up and and essentially  we're just kind of waiting how long it's all. miles and miles around the city of mos  like oh god like 100 like hundreds of miles.

okay dude it's like all the way around wow  and mosul is still you know 50 miles away from. where our position is so it's a good  distance like you can't even see the city. from where we are so you go up to it and the pesh  are super friendly they're a great fighting force. a good partner force very motivated and they  loved kill isis so we loved working with them.

building a relationship you know they they have  like their tea time chai and uh we do a little key. leader and get kles with their leadership regular  chai meetings but um arc they fought really well. with chuck keating and his platoon built great  relationships that turned over to our platoon. and we just kind of nourished that and  built really good camaraderie so anytime. we showed up everybody was excited and uh.

they had some good intel for us like hey  this building right here that one right there. there's bad guys in it it's like all right  cool we're gonna go check it out we're like. hey we've been seeing they'd always give us  a pretty good pass down on on the local area. and so you're building up this pattern of life on  these villages you're taking notes bring it back. and and you're typing in you know like what time  somebody left one time somebody went in and hoping.

that you see a gun you know and essentially if you  saw that gun or they tried shooting at our drone. like you were gonna you were gonna kill them  and and a lot of times you get creative right. you're like oh we're gonna get like there's  a guy i bet he looks like he's up to no good. you know when you get close like closer to him  you try to get him low he rips off his backpack.

starts dumping rounds you're like gotcha all right  bring it back we're calling it a aircraft and. we'll get eyes on them and hopefully and drop and  because the ford line of troops was so long man. these aircraft were like all over the place you're  dealing with french rafaels you're dealing with. like every cast platform under the sun  essentially but there's only so much to. go around so sometimes if if almost if  you were lucky you'd get a cast platform.

but some strikes took like two or three hours to  develop just to get aircraft to to drop on some of. these guys and so there's there's frustrations  in that you know in and of itself just like. it's not necessarily what you  thought you were going to be doing. you still feel like you're contributing to the  fight right but you're like ah i'm kind of getting. restless i think this is kind of monotonous and  i'm going to get used to getting mortared i'm. ready to do something a little different  and so there's like a little tick i think.

everybody felt it like all right we're ready  to do some more navy seal stuff and not just. shooting people shooting people  with 50 cows and dropping orders and. watching kill tv and dropping bombs on  people yeah and i think part of that was. like i feel really fortunate because  i was a jtac and i was constantly. i was constantly working even when we came back  they'd be they'd say hey you have 16 hours of. watch on this isr platform i'm like damn dude  i just got after like two days off the flop.

okay like i'm i'm gonna sit here and watch  the screen talking to on the phone to um. this is our platform and we're developing  pattern of life on this village together. and so it got to the point where i put like new  guys or other dudes like hey i'll i'll take a. shift and and watch i'm like all right you know  you train like this is what we're looking for.

if anybody asks this this is how you respond  i said if you see anybody with a gun come get. me you know or doing something nefarious and that  could be transporting ammunition moving a v bid um. fine like digging a cave in cave the cave system  was insane so just come get me so you know i'd be. asleep and then be like woody there's a guy with  a gun all right you know go over type hey you know.

you guys got in the air yeah we can get out we  can get you hellfire all right right do a little. contract bring a couple guys in they're like  boom watch them fly up in the air 70 80 feet like. let me know if there's anything else going back  to bed you know and that was kind of like it. for i think we got there in august august  through september okay and in the beginning.

of october so about two months yeah about two  months and and honestly it was really not like. having it wasn't i wouldn't say it was like  fast pace um we were always gone like we were. always going to the flot every day every other day  maybe one two days sometimes three days if there. was something really going on or something  some kind of collection that we needed but.

it was it was pretty constant and. it was just enough action to like keep us on our  toes but also sometimes not enough the mortars. were just inaccurate enough so you're kind of like  get you get a little bit complacent you're like. another mortar yeah you know and we  talked about it a little bit like um. we got to work with some delta guys and  those dudes were doing their mission but.

they couldn't really do anything because of the  nature of the flot and what isis had posted up. all the roads are v-bitted or um ied'd and isis  had like anti-aircraft stuff capabilities so. you know our budget was kind of  smaller we'd have to conserve our. javelin rocket system which is essentially  an anti-tank rocket it launches up in the air.

locks on to a heat signature of some sort drops  down and and blows up whatever you're trying to to. shoot so we have you know we have a limited number  of javelins we have to kind of like work like. conserve our mortars right we don't have a huge  budget and these guys are like hey man we got like. 70 javelins and we just we just want to go out  and do some good work like let's go you know and. so they land on their chinooks we'd pick them  up we'll offload a ton of javelins we'd go to.

the flot destroy anything with a heat signature  essentially that was doing something bad and uh. head back re-outfit they'd hit us up on the  phone hey man got some rangers over here. that needs some mortar experience bring  them out bring out 100 mortars whatever. getting a little mortar battle and then  and then head back oh [ __ ] yeah and so.

you know the whole time we all  know like mosul is right there yeah. and so we're all chomping at the bit to like we  want to do more like this isn't this isn't enough. like let let's go you want to get up close yeah  you want to get close yeah and you hear rumors. you know it might happen it might happen and  then it's like hey it's probably gonna happen.

you're like if it happens like are  we gonna get the third a you know. the advise assist in a company we  were afraid it was just gonna be. the advise and assist right right where were you  like oh we're gonna tell the generals what to do. and then we'll hang out at our house and you can  come to us with any questions and we'll kind of. keep doing our job from from afar so we  were kind of nervous like dude if this. really goes like can we get the company like  we want to be there we want to be with them.

and dude overnight comes out we're going to mosul  it's like and it's happening in like two days. maybe 24 hours and so it's like hey guess what  we got the third a like like we're gonna like. we're gonna lead an invasion dude you know  we're gonna be part of like taking the city.

and it's cool um i mean everybody  hears about what isis is doing. and and the crap that they're doing to women and  children anybody that doesn't believe in them and. it kind of took me back to you know let's let's  refresh everybody's memory what are they doing. um they're going into pretty much every village  anybody who isn't it doesn't conscribe with their.

religious beliefs either taking women and children  as slaves publicly assassinating their men. um how i'm oh dude they're just lining them  up and taking them out to the river and just. popping them dropping them in rivers pop them drop  them in the river like cattle and slaughter like. slaughtering people public executions beheadings  i mean you name it dude these it's as they're.

as bad as they get burning people alive drowning  them in cages yup wrapping deck cord around their. heads dead core is basically a rope that is an  explosive yep for those uh that don't know lining. up christians on the beach wrapping decor around  their heads clacking it off i mean and and putting. this on on the internet you know and so you know  as a young kid he was growing up in the church.

you think back to my ch i think back to like my  high school and dealing with the struggles of. like why aren't all of americans on a team and why  don't we all unify and how come we can't get along. and i moved to this foreign country i'm like dude  well like what what does it mean to be an american. and and what makes what makes us what makes us  like value like why do we fight for the things.

that we fight for like right and and like you  got to come to turn like at the end of the day. you have to realize that life is precious right  and it doesn't matter if you're wearing a flag. on your shoulder and it's red white and  blue or red white and black or whatever.

whatever it is right life is precious and  those people in that city were suffering. they were being persecuted because  of stuff that they believed in and. and i think that's something that makes  that makes our country so wonderful. right is that people are willing to go  and like that i was willing to go and.

my friends were willing to go. to risk their lives for for people that they  didn't know you know and and dude even even the. peshmerga you know like they had tribal territory  that they considered theirs the kurdish people. um that like they were gonna go clear  these villages that of areas that they had. no relation to you know just  because it was their country.

and they they were sick and tired of freaking what  isis was doing you know they were motivated and so. you know you you start getting hyped up and you're  so freaking stoked to just like and honor you feel. honored like dude i am this isn't news this  isn't cnn i'm not watching this on fox news. like tomorrow morning i'm gonna line up we're all  gonna go to the flot together we're gonna there's.

gonna be a bulldozer it's gonna knock down that  wall and we're going in we're going into the city. so you wake up early morning our platoon  who was separated um split in half. right to cover this flot we got  together we get a mission brief. eod comes up talks about the ied threat  veepit threat very high um and like hey uh.

first thing in the morning tomorrow we're  going out or our mission brief was that. morning i said it's pretty much as soon as sun  up comes this is still nighttime early morning. it's like pretty much a sun up we're pushed  like the pests are gonna break the line and. and we're rolling in with them so it's a daytime  mop what was the actual mission uh so at first.

it was to essentially encompass and clear a lot  of these villages that were outside of mosul. okay and because of the the sensitivity and time  right as soon as you break that line and they. know you're coming they're going to start like  fortifying right so you don't have a whole lot.

of time to clear all these villages so what ended  up happening was is you kind of cordon them off. and then deal with them as you can but we're  pushing as quickly as we can to get to the city. and that kind of causes some problems later and we  can go into that um as far as like enemy tactics. and ambushes and that kind of stuff so day one  up uh day one of the invasion our my half of.

the platoon is gonna start from the north side the  other half it's gonna break down on the east side. we're going to push we're going to kind  of cordon off this section of villages. we're going to create a essentially encompass  this section of villages and then meet up and. then go and push into the city and then the pastor  gonna like kind of clear out a lot of the villages. and man we get to the flot and i'm  telling you it is crazy there are.

thousands of fighters lined up on this berm  it's it's like world war one man there's like. thousands as far as you can see everybody's  gun carrying there's families there. mothers and sons we're gonna you know guys would  go out and fight they'd come back they eat with. their families go back out and fight it was wild  bro it was wild like parents were running food.

you know out to their their sons who were fighting  uh it was it was something else man so we line up. we're getting ready you see like these 19 year  old kids loading up in these mad max armored. uh bulldozers and they just look mean man  those are some like the toughest people. that we see dude they're just like the first  ones in you know taking a ton of ton of bullets. and mortars and rpgs and they open the door  it's like they're sweating like somebody's.

handing them water and it's like an 18 year old  kid driving this thing you know that's crazy but. uh so anyway so isis is literally just like right  on the other side of the the berm yeah yeah all. these buildings they have tunnels do their rat  lines are so long and they run so deep like they. have tunnels that go out like out of the city out  of these like little towns and stuff so i think.

um a lot of them when they smelt what was in the  air a lot of them cleared out so maybe you'd find. like two three fighters in these villages more  or less it was like a lot to harass but there. was definitely a couple of these villages that had  like pretty solid fighting positions set up and uh. and people ready with v-beds.

so we're we're lined up we're ready to go and  you hear people start chatting and yelling. and everybody's looking up to the sky and we  look up and it's a little drone flying around. up top and some guys like isis it's like oh man  isis knows we're coming because they had drones. too they were flying like it's go time like and  then dude everybody starts shooting at it the.

entire like you what a sound bro like thousands  of rifles shooting at a little tiny little throw. to the sky bro it was insane everybody's like what  you know thousands of guns going off just tracers. going and you're watching this little drone and  then you see smoke spark and then you drive it.

and everybody's just like it's like a football  standpoint you know we're all like know yeah. it's like some braveheart yeah dude it was it was  insane and then you look back and way in the back. is cansoff or canadian friends and  they're like throwing their hats on. the ground throwing their hands up in the  air it was a canadian drone and it's like. bro fracture side on day one you know like  not a good start shoulda deconflicted oh.

uh those dudes were crafty man  with the the drone stuff even. when we were at the flot yeah i would like set up  a hammock you know between our armored vehicles. sometimes and like i'm gonna take we don't there's  nothing happening i'm gonna take a little nap and.

then the next day at that same spot drone crashes  lands and the french are at that at that post. two patch guys bring it over like look at this  drone we got they crack it open take some pictures. and it detonates one french dudes lose a  leg one of them had like shrapnel to his arm. and uh they had rewired and repackaged explosives  as like batteries on on the drone so the patch.

thought you know isis crashed their drone that  they were trying to spy on us with and it turned. out to be booby-trapped yeah and and we were  dealing with that the ied thing even on the. friendly side um we can go i have an interesting  story about that one too if you don't do it. is okay we go back back and go back in time  a little bit before the invasion yeah um.

so it was actually we were doing the flot route  you know we were driving out to the flood route. there's really only one road that we could  take to this one op this outpost and vehicles. supply vehicles kept getting ied'ed on that route  and there was a couple instances where they had. suicide side bombers that they killed on that  route in our eod and us we'd go up we'd disarm.

the vests and then they'd get rid of the  bodies but so they had one route that was. specifically getting hit by ieds a lot we're  like all right well this is our route you know. like we take this all the time like let's  see if we can find out who's doing this you. know and there's this little tiny village right  off the route it's the only village in the area. that runs right up against this road that we take  so like whoever it is during this village right.

so thinking all right what if before light we  sent up a rocky element they'll post up we'll. see if we can find out where they're if they're  reporting our movements right and maybe we can get. maybe we can find out based off  their location of ping or whatever. um where they're at and we can find them  so send out the recce they get set up.

and my job was i was gonna get out of my v i  was driving up on the road we were supposed to. stop in the middle of the road i was going to  get out mess around with some stuff in the back. and see if like hey you know the americans have  stopped on the road because you wouldn't really. stop on on there for any normal reason so you know  we assume something we did something something's. broken in the back or something so we get out  a mess and mess around with stuff in the back.

load up see what we get when we get back to the  plot continue our mission whatever so they get set. real this is real time now we pull up my new guy  um d is driving and i have a eod guy in the back. i'm like all right man this should be a good spot  it's like you can just stop here so he kind of. like pulls over to the side of the road doesn't  pull off the road stops like all right here we go. open my door there's maybe a foot between  the dirt and the paved road jump down.

walk around the vehicle climb up the tire this is  me facing walk up the vehicle on the village side. i'm in the back my lpo is in the  back he's up in the vehicle behind me. mess around for a minute he's  like all right man should be good. okay i hop down walk around to the front of  the vehicle it was early morning beautiful. sunrise coming up and i just heard something  like the back of my head say stop look around.

you know just like that moment where  it's like just pause and i stop i freeze. and i'm like looking and dude from my feet  to your feet i see right off the paper road. a little ball of wires and a battery pack  sitting right above the ground covered in dust.

i'm like that's a [ __ ] ied right in front of our. vehicle i look down the road like safe and  safe out right and i'd walk to the back of. my vehicle or to my door climb up and then  well probably bleep out his name but he says.

what is it woody i say there's an id right in  front of our vehicle man his face like oh suck. you know stay right there you know i get  in the vehicle he clears he clears around. turns out he's like woody you almost died today  man he's like there's crushed wire all the way. against the side of the road where you got  out and so i kept like this little strip.

of wire where dude i mean if i would  have stepped off and stepped on this wire. like that id it was like right there in front  of our vehicle if if we pulled off the side. of the road it would have clocked off you  know and so you know now all of a sudden. you're like all right we actually have to  fix this because if somebody drives through. and this thing goes off like you know somebody's  gonna die so we cordoned off the road eod clears. behind us the other vehicle breaks down comes  down towards us you know we just stop any kind.

of traffic ud comes up clips it we attach it  to a pool line pull it back with the vehicle. eod goes to clear the hole brushes his hand over  it and there's like a secondary switch that didn't. go off with a secondary charge under it man talk  about a miracle right he's right on top of it. like touches it and uh another  ied had to deal with that one and.

and so yeah that i mean like  that's the kind of stuff that. like you go to the flot and you're still  dealing with stuff but like there's still. you know there's still some danger there yeah but  yeah sorry we digressed from the uh mosul thing i. thought i just thought that was a kind of a cool  story yeah it's like the near death thing but um. so should we go back to continue yeah.

so we go into. we break past the front line  right that's where we're at. shot the drone down killed the canadian drone  now we're ready to charge in to finish this off. so we go in bulldozer bust the line and we're  like vehicle number five in line on the start. of this on the start of this train of vehicles  there's like hundreds of vehicles behind us.

immediately dude mortar small arms fire it's  like that vehicle or that building over there. it's like dumping on it tap building  over there dumping on it taking fire from. dude confusing as [ __ ] it's the best way  like dude like there's no way to describe it. like it's just there's so  much there's so many places.

and like you cannot you cannot point them all out  and i remember it being so frustrating because. like dude it was just everywhere it's like dude  where i mean where are we getting shot from yeah. and dude we start driving we get close  to this village where we're supposed to. you know get around to and all the vehicles  stop like why are we stopped why are we.

stopped you know what's going on hey terp go  run over the general's car and ask him i stop. he gets out goes over the general car  and he's like uh we are doing tea time. no we're not like we're not doing tea time  uh he's like we're doing t type all right. all right let's grab mre we're doing tea  time you know nobody's going anywhere.

and uh dude like we stopped we're eating memories  in our mat vs and you're seeing dudes kind of like. running around their vehicles i'm like eating  my mac and cheese or whatever and i see like. you know in front of our vehicle  25 yards in front of us there's got. guys eating something slams to the ground  i'm like rpg these dudes like look over. go back to drinking their chai man and it's just  like are you [ __ ] serious it was it was insane.

it was absolute madness [ __ ] tea  time dude [ __ ] gotta have your chai. they're shooting rpgs at you dude i'm not  joking this rpg probably landed like 20. 15 to 20 feet from where they're like  huddled up and it's literally like a. maybe scoot towards the tire a little bit and then.

sipping their team in and feel along yeah wow  so out of nowhere uh general and a couple other. vehicle start like peeling off one of our vehicles  follows them and the way that this village is. located there's like a main road that cuts there's  a village and then there's this kind of like. large hill behind them and that's where the  forward line of troops was like it kind of curved. right kind of curved around forward line of troops  was there and they were going to kind of overwatch.

as we were pushing around this village does  that make sense yeah that kind of draw a picture. so the general started going towards this  main road that led towards this village. one of our vehicles followed it they got up a  little ways with maybe 10 or 20 other vehicles. and the i think it's french  intel were on the hilltop.

and they said they called my oic he's  like hey there's a v-bed moving towards. the convoy that's currently just on the road to  the village and my oc is like hey like you know. i don't know what the general's doing he's  kind of like doing his own thing right now. like hey bring it back reconsolidate and  we're all gonna push it together you know. and our vehicle was like all right check they  whip around a couple other vehicles follow them.

and my vehicle is the front most. element covering down on the section when they  like ready to receive them when they come in. does that make sense our guns pointed towards the  village where the supposed v-bed was coming to. and uh we knew that there was some like they  kind of put us in a weird position because we. knew there were some friendly vehicles still that  might still come back right we don't know how many.

the general took exactly so we're like all  right our vehicle came back turned around right. kind of like right next to us and i'm  looking down at my little tablet and i'm like. checking out the the layout and i'm trying  to figure out what the road that the. french are saying that this v bid's coming  from i'm looking down and uh my new guy's like. car on the road car on the road  i like to click up 800 yards.

like what is that bat is that a passion is that  a car do we have cars 700 yards i start seeing. smoke behind the car billowing out 500 yards  i'm like dude i think that's a that's the v-bit. and you can see it man and it looks like  something from mad max it's all it's just. like this sudan that's plated up it's got a  small window uh armored window maybe two feet.

by one foot and it is just friggin plowing right  towards my vehicle and uh our other vehicle here. 400 yards tim light it up. i'm seeing around skip and hitting it i'm  seeing around pinging off the roof of it.

i see around hit the glass shatter it in  this vehicle 200 yards and i think back. to that meeting with the sas dudes [ __ ]  run mate right and as soon as i thought that. i hear break contact on comms immediately followed  by back right we turn our vehicles around dude. gunner's still shooting as  we're turning there's two.

um light-skinned vehicles one's a medic truck  uh right behind us we're driving away from it. i see the vehicle v-bit 100 yards. 75 and there's there's people all over the ground  like there's people running away from this thing.

and then 50 yards maybe inside clacks off because  i order and i i see eight people just he vaporized. man missed it gone nothing see a hand fly  over the front of our vehicles you know and. i remember like thinking whoo.

we're okay and i was like what and then you look  around you hear one up two up three up four up. it's like we're taking the hill so you know follow  vic 4 we're going to take the cell we pull up. to this hilltop and what are all the peshmerga  doing once everybody they're all running. away like everybody is running back to the  flot and uh tanks peeling off out of there.

and we're like we're gonna hold the hill and  so we post up we get a little bit of cover. there's another one here behind  me there's another one behind us. like how close how close like where is it  and then gunner's like i got it i see it. and then you hear or our guns all  four vehicles going off and he's like.

you know i hear the gunner in in the tour he's  like it it looks like it's trying to like it looks. like he's trying to get covered behind a berm  he's like he might he might be stuck and then. number two goes off and when that  happened you know you see people. out in the field that were running away like  look back they saw us shooting they're like. all right they all came charging back bulldozer  comes back starts putting up berms man.

and uh dudes start like digging in and uh we we  dismount we're kind of getting the lay of the land. uh snipers located right on the side of our  map be kind of hunched down looking looking. at the village another vehicle comes ripping  out man same [ __ ] dude i mean these guys were. armed to the teeth blowing themselves  up to kill us how how crazy is that.

right like do you ever think like how many of us  are convicted enough to do something and literally. kill yourself to kill somebody else you ever think  about how freaking much dedication that takes i. think about it i used to think about it all the  time and it's it just shows you how dedicated that. yeah is way more dedicated yes i mean absolutely  and they you know we go into their caves.

and you'd find antipsychotic medication man  like these guys had been in these caves so long. that they were taking antipsychosis meds right  because they'd been living in a cave in the dark. it's like do you know somebody are  you dedicated enough to do something. so much that you're willing to go crazy for it you  know wow that's that's an enemy you know that's.

something you need to be careful. of when you go to fight him so yeah man comes  around back of the line um clacks himself off on. it was i think it ended up  being a father and his two sons. you know in a in a vehicle kind of coming  out to the flood or where we wherever we were. so that's three another one came from behind  luckily the patch got him and i think in in total.

that night we had like five v-beds coming down on  our position that was just a start and so nowhere. no air assets at the time they were locked up  with a tick and it's starting to get very dark. my oecd calls me over so i  came in having trouble satcom. com's guy's trying to work it too he's like  i just heard a nightline come out i said.

okay and he gave me he's like they  ran off you know they'll sometimes. depending on the sop some some people like doing  some don't but uh it doesn't really matter they. read off his last initials last three and you  know you you hear the f and you're thinking. how many like okay it could be him it could  be him it could be him like who was like whoa.

okay the nine line what what's the word he's like  expectant for viewers that don't know what happens. when somebody's called in expectant it means  essentially you're not expecting them to survive. that's my platoon. and uh.

like we're gonna hang out here tonight we're  gonna hold we're gonna hold this spot all. night and then uh and we'll we need more ammo  we need yeah we need more water like we'll. ride back we'll refit and then we'll come  back out and so stayed up all night long. um you know pucker level 5000 alone and afraid  and uh sun sun started coming up driving back.

man you're driving down the road and you're  kind of like looking out the window thinking. what just had like what happened  you know you're kind of like. we're not back yet but what that that was  not what i expected like i felt like it. would be a lot more organized than that you  expect it to be but dude the enemy has a say. the enemy always has a say and so driving  by there's these like planted fields i look.

i'm looking down and i see like there's this like  little ring around all these plants and i see like. one five five rounds around the bush i'm like hey  stop you know hey le yo do you know that there's a. huge ied here so you alert the partner force all  right keep driving so we get back to the house. and.

you're like hey or eod jj find it instead. and you know i i wasn't close i i won't lie  and say i'm i was like best friends with a guy. uh he was in her platoon during ult  he was an excellent eud in fact he was.

a lot of i think a lot of guys like try to train  you and coach you but jj was the guy that was like. you're not taking this seriously  enough like this [ __ ] will kill you. you know like you need to check  doors before you enter them. and and i remember that sticking like dude. jj's serious you know jj's good he he means  business and his story and what happened with.

the rest of my platoon i don't feel is  mine to tell but what i can say is that. two of my very very good friends in the seal  teams and two guys that i like i love very much. would tell you that jj  saved her life that day yeah. and so.

we're day one one kia it's kind of a [ __ ] show  and and we're going out the next day you know. so it's like all right going out the next day and  uh they were going to clear that village that we. were talking about that we were initially pushing  into and we were going to be up on the hilltop. as the overwatch element and calling out movement  enemy movement to the patches they cleared.

and you know hopefully giving our snipers some  some business i don't know if it was just kind. of like hey we need you guys but we don't want  to just like throw you back down there right away. but like we're going back out there tomorrow  yeah so we re re-outfitted went out um one. of our guys got a javelin kill blew up  a v-bid and that was like a huge win.

um just seeing that and um the push continues. was it all ieds uh so so much ids and  v bits like so much ieds and v bits and. a lot of small arm fire it was i mean you you know  how it's not always up close yeah it most of it.

pretty much all of it was just like you know  muzzle flashes or it's there it's the only. building there that's that's the only building  and we're getting shot from that direction. you know what i mean and then you just dump  slap rounds and do it until the shooting stops. and the shooting stops and you keep driving and  then you know you put you let the pests run in. that's kind of how that first day went shut  we talked about kind of coordinating off these.

villages we talked about the push into the city  well i think it was around the dec geez november. november or december time frame when  we're actually like into the city and. as we're pushing up.

as we're pushing up essentially what we're doing  is we are located right behind anytime like the. kurdish or when we got to the city the kurdish  pulled back they're like hey we have the land. that you know was our inner ancestral right and  we don't feel like we need to push into mosul. and then um iraqi forces kind of took over and  started the initial clearance from this south.

and east and and kind of held  off at the north a little bit. and so our platoon was kind of stopped at  the northern section of the of the city. so getting into into that um i mean i  i can just give you kind of like what. i get i'll just give you kind of like what how  crazy some of these situations were were i don't. know if i can describe every day because every day  was different right you'd go some days it it was.

pretty chill and there wouldn't be a lot happening  every day you're getting mortared right but i. i remember like christmas we're kind of holding  back we're doing some isr the line's kind of at a. standstill so we're trying to figure out where the  enemy is and like what buildings are holding up. and it's like christmas eve or something  and we're doing shifts and rotations and and. you do security on like a guy will do security on  the roof or a couple dudes will do security on the.

roof a couple dudes sleeping down and we're just  moving from house to house to house as the flot. as the flaw gets closer and closer and you spend  one night in one place and it's freezing cold. so you're going through these these people's  stuff and you're like what burns you know you're. building like small fires to try to keep warm  and then packing up going to the next house the. next morning you're pushing up and i remember  dude it would be like you'd be sleeping and.

in the house rattles wood board from the  ceiling falls hits your buddy you like look up. you're like you all right yeah and then you  like crash again you know and i mean it was just. like constant barrage of of mortars how many guys  per house um that we were staying in yeah uh it. got to the point where our platoon would kind of  post up we tried to find a spot that had like a.

pretty large courtyard and we just kind of maybe  picked two houses but we were there so temporarily. that a lot of times it was like we're gonna  hold up in this house we might be there for. five six hours or we might be there for a  day or two it just depended on if we could. find a way to maneuver around the enemy and and  push the enemy um back so maybe eight per house. yeah i would say eight nine we had a lot  of support you know we had cct guys c.

c d c t t c c t yeah she's cct guys we had ud guys  um we'd bring the techs out sometimes with us um. we had a ton of i mean as you can imagine comms  issues yeah and a lot of stuff that we were. running we'd even bring out you know satellite  dishes so we could do chat with the sodif. and those dudes would kind of like pop  that stuff up it just depended on what.

what what was happening in that region  in that side of the of the fight. how long we would stay but i do remember one  night going back to the problem that it creates. clearing these houses are these villages  at a later time we were in northern mosul. and it was probably 2 three in the morning  and then an eruption of fire starts.

guys start moving up to the roofs we're starting  to move around and then louder the volley comes up. more and more and more mortars start coming in  tracer rounds are just like whipping and hitting. like pulls bricks in front of us like  dudes are just you know getting getting low.

and dude it was like that night was a barrage of  gunfire gunfire for like three hours we have guys. down below we're like tossing up our little drone  trying to figure out what's going on we have some. the the isis or uh the iraqi force  in a house just in front of us. and you know they're reporting stuff to us what  they're seeing and there's like a bulldozer.

that's pushed up on the on the flop they had put a  bulldozer or we had built up a berm around kind of. like the section of houses that we're at there's  a bulldozer trying to push in so we're dumping. mortars on this thing we're we're watching to see  if we can can get positive hits we get a hit with. our mortar dude runs out of it and um there's  a lull and then all of a sudden from the south.

it was a coordinated attack  from isis forces to the north. and the south and uh i remember being on the  rooftop and i'm kind of reporting down to my oic. who's down below talking to working you  know essentially with the soda and telling. them the situation that we're dealing  with we're trying to get air assets and. i remember going down there and being like  yo you know em you're gonna come up and.

have some fun with us dude and he's like oh  man i'm sorry yeah i'll be up in a second balls. deep in this you know chat thing it's like  all right man come on up when you're ready. and there's like 10 minute break of fire and  i'm looking at my bass it's still pretty dark. a pass is like a little tablet i'm like  kind of like zooming in on the buildings.

kind of like right over there there  and then em comes over and he's like. oh bb tell me what's going on over here man i'm  like all right check it out he's looking over. my shoulder i'm like so the bulldozer's right here  it's like this is that's where we're taking i hear. and mike that coming he he says falls down on  the ground i feel something just charlie hoarse.

my collarbone and i just like drop i like fumble  my tablet and i'm like what was that and i'm like. we're hit like we're hit guys immediately grab  mike and i'm i don't know what getting shot feels. like you know something just slammed me like am  i in shock and i'm like feeling what was that. and dude calls back it's like what are you  okay it's like i think i think i'm okay.

i think i'm all right and uh yeah i'm  had taken around right through the lip. knocked out a bunch of his teeth  and they couldn't find the bullet. so they didn't know if it was log lodged in his  throat he was conscious um but we didn't know. like what the extent of the the in like the damage  was in his mouth so we're like all right we gotta.

we gotta get him at it like we gotta medevac him  and so now we're dealing with that whole piece. i'm up on the roof still a guy comes up he's  like hey man medic comes up he's like hey man. let me check you out make sure you're good  i'm like dude i'm good i don't know what it. was and you know jokes start it's like oh  woody got shot but didn't get shot you know. it's like he's hit and uh we we coke and joke  and laugh about it but uh mike he's down there.

somebody comes up he's like hey dude he is high  a f you gotta get down there he's funny and i. was like he's good he's like yeah i think he's  gonna be fine he's joking around with us but he's. missing a bunch of teeth and it's funny because  it's well is this your oic this is my aoc aoic.

yeah ah just dude if everybody in the teams was  like him i i don't know if i could ever leave. he was awesome dude just a great dude and uh great  personality great sense of humor stellar team guy. and he's like you got to go down and joke  tease on t's on him a little bit it's like. all right i'll go down and check on him  so this guy gets shot in the [ __ ] face. yup and then five minutes later he's down  there joking around with everybody bad ass.

awesome holy [ __ ] yeah he's good dude  and um so i go down i'm like my where. i'm sorry dude i'm keeping like mike where are you  so i know where i am with my best friends you know. yeah you are buddy yeah you are and uh  he's just awesome guy man and and so.

the day continues this crazy fog rolls in morning  comes so hold on hold on sorry so what the hell. hit you yeah bullet it was the bullet that went  through his face hit you in the chest so i heard. like a ping like a zip a ping and there was a ton  of rebar in this building that was in front of us. i think what may have happened was it hit a piece  of rebar fractured i got hit by some kind of like.

small piece of shrapnel or something i don't  know and then he took he took the the big piece. you know or something i don't know man but i  don't know how you describe it something hit me. i don't know and the plate and it was like right  above my plate [ __ ] yeah couldn't find anything. little red mark but there's nothing crazy man  i don't know who knows where it was maybe i'm.

maybe i'm just being dramatic i don't  know dude i don't know something hit me. so. so i'm like everybody's we we brought this  like portable propane tank with us and we. there's like a little skillet that we'd bring  somebody brought some eggs to us one of the. uh iraqi guys or something brought some eggs i  don't know and i was sitting there like cracking.

some eggs about to eat i help you i was like hey  man need you up on the roof in a second he said we. might break down and go to a different spot i said  okay walks out the door i hear medic i'm like what. all of a sudden two guys come in pull him in  and he's like my arm you know like dude two.

and uh they start getting him checked out he  had through and through in his in his right. arm it's like all right we're breaking it down  so i guess we're breaking it down we're where. do you need me coach so we just start breaking  things down moving houses we get both of them. evac one of them has to go through some serious  surgery gets sent home and em has like two days.

he's gotta let his bleeding stop and like some  gaps in his teeth scab a little bit but he's right. back out there with us two days later yeah back in  the up yeah man that's kind of like that's kind of. what they look like and and don't give me like  there are there were days that were super boring. there are days like that that are kind of more  eventful and i don't want this to sound like.

the most it what it their parts that were  disappointing there were parts that i'm proud. of but it's my deployment you know it was kind  of like that was my ex general experience with. whoa with it i don't know what were you most proud  of uh by the time we by the time we ripped out. february around february i think mid-january the  entire eastern side of mosul had been like cleared.

essentially and dude the iraqis did  the heavy lifting like they really did. and they were taking heavy casualties i think  the projection was but there was a big wall. halfway through i think it isis was much more  fortified than we we had anticipated go figure and.

i there was a projection that the initial  force that started the push by the time. that we cleared the entire eastern side  of the city would be at five percent. bam yeah do you have any idea how many how many  bombs you dropped on that deployment yeah i i. could i can't i couldn't count like more that  more than i could yeah maybe probably probably.

uh yeah it just depends like some of them  and like not every single one of those were. on people it might dude i don't know because  there's other work like there's cct's with us. so i wasn't doing all the heavy  lifting we do we do shifts so it was. sometimes it was just a planted vivid that  we found parked on the street nobody's in it.

you know you bomb it or a tunnel system  you'd be striking it or sometimes you'd find. a cave and a dude that was just shooting at you or  your little cardboard airplane would run into it. you couldn't get air another dude would run  into it with an ak five six more dudes that. run into it with an ak your aircraft comes in  you're like perfect thanks for piling up all. your buddies for me you know and you'd strike  it and you'd see a bunch of secondary and stuff. blowing up on the inside of the mountain so  you knew that they were storing stuff in there.

and uh sometimes it was just  blowing up cave entrances. shutting shutting down their their ability to  maneuver dude what's crazy is some of these caves. they would they'd use car batteries and bring out  tools to dig these things and i remember one time. going or looking on isr and just seeing this pile  of dirt outside this cave and they just built up.

this like fortified position outside the entrance  of this thing is all these big white rocks. like dude that is like a that is  helms deep man that is that's a a base. you know that they had built i was like  that's a really bright white rock i wonder. and you know i go on google earth and i look and i  zoom out on this mountain range and dude it's like. white rocks white rocks white rocks white rocks  white rocks and i'm like go to this coordinate.

slew over cave entrance go to this coordinate  cave entrance i'm like all right label targets. you know one two three and you're building a  whole target package on all these cave entrances. just shutting them down thanks google yeah so  crazy yeah man i mean use the tools that you can. you can yeah um but i do i don't know how many  i don't i don't think it was quite a hundred.

well whatever but yeah it's a lot between  all of us yeah it was easy yeah um easy. um a lot of tack a lot of what a lot of tech  yeah dude yeah it really was uh it was busy. it is everything's condensed you're in these  small buildings and you're just kind of like it's.

confusing why weren't you guys working at night  because none of our partner force had nots okay. they couldn't there's just it wasn't possible no  i'm just curious there were there were gun fights. at night but they it would have been awesome to be  able to maneuver and move around and we did most. of our moving at night but for them their fighters  were just they just wanted to fight in the day. how about uh isis are they're well equipped  they were very well equipped was it all our.

stuff oh yeah that we left a lot of it  and uh you know you'd find ammo cans with. foreign asian writing and stuff on it i don't  know if that's actually where they get all their. ammo but i assume yeah they were getting a lot  of stuff and they're resourceful man they're. making their own chemical weapons they were  making their own chemical weapons yeah so you. know you get mortared you see a lot of times it's  just like the the dust cloud a little black smoke.

and when it's chem is always just a big yellow  cloud and luckily it wasn't very like concentrated. because it dissipates quickly and the rounds that  they were la bananas weren't or at least those. cameras weren't very effective so it never got so  close that we were we were actually like ripping. on our masks there were a couple close calls were  like all right i'm gonna put my mask in my pocket.

in case this one gets it's getting a little  uncomfortable they're really walking them in. on us but i mean in the intel briefings that  you guys were getting were they telling you. you know what they were equipped with that they  have all of our our old equipment that we'd left. there everybody we already knew we already yeah we  already knew you're seeing tow missiles guys are. they're shooting anti-aircraft um gustav rounds  at hilos yeah and yeah so that's a great gas.

platform that we got to use a lot was the apaches  you think we would have learned a [ __ ] lesson. we don't but look at us still doing it man yeah  did you see them like with our vehicles and. suburbans humvees night vision not not so much  vehicles because though they had built all these. tunnel systems in the city and so they were  maneuvering mostly by foot okay so if they were.

if they were in a vehicle as a v-bed okay yeah and  that was all most engagements and fights that we. got into it was like always an issue initiated  by v-bed okay so if that you hear viabid clock. offset like something okay well we're going  that way but they were built they were see when. i was over there i mean vivids and i mean it was  always it was always a threat but they we didn't. we weren't worried about armored car bombs coming  after you were they all kind of were they all.

armored they look like mad max vehicles yeah  yeah all of them every single one of them they. had like factories built there just for  these v-beds i can try to get you some. some pictures and stuff i'll send you  some stuff yeah that would be cool. yeah so the v-bid thing and then they had also  booby-trapped ied'd like most buildings you know.

most of the majority of them not most like a lot  of buildings had ieds in them and so are you d. guys were freaking busy man they were busy there  there's all like there's always something okay man. you gotta go over there and check out that  there's like a boot over there that looks weird. and you go over and there's boot and  there's like mortar round laying there. damn you know it's strapped up or dude it was con  like constantly dealing with the ied thing and.

and luckily the part our partner force  was really good at identifying them. so it would be like that's an ied or like hey  we need to get like we have an ied over here. so they kind of like point us most of the  time in in the direction we'd find them but. we try to like if we try not to be the ones  to step on them yeah if they could you know. let them you need to let them fight for the  country because as soon as we get super involved.

like they'll let us they know they'll just we'll  get into it and and they'll let us do all the work. yeah so you there's like this give and take right  like you want to be helpful you want to contribute. and you want to provide support but you don't want  to come in so aggressive that they're like oh the. americans are going to do it now yeah you know  so it's kind of a weird balance that you have to. they have to work with hard to have that kind of  discipline dude yeah it is because you want to.

you want to be the first dude you want to get  after yeah yeah well let's take a quick break. we just got done with a hell of a [  __ ] deployment fighting isis in mosul.

you're on your way home so let's pick  up right there yeah so maybe backtrack. a little bit while we're on this deployment  you're always kind of talking about what's. the next step in your career what is the  platoon doing next where are you going and. you hear rumors about you like who's staying  in the platoon who needs to go somewhere else.

who's going who wants to go to shore duty you  know who wants to do another platoon they start. asking these questions well i don't know if i  mentioned but 10 days before my first deployment. before i deployed the first time i had my  firstborn son and 10 days deployed came back. kind of learning how to be a father and then  how old was it when you got back i guess what.

like six six months were you guys doing six month  deployments yeah it was a six month deployment we. did rip out early so it was it was shorter than  that but um he was around that age so about five. five months between five and six months bam  yeah so coming home to my little five month. old buddy or particularly what a four five six  seven eight however old he was at the time he. um coming back so i'm learning to adapt  to you know a whole new dynamic in my.

marriage my wife had kind of developed a  system and now i'm stepping on that and. so i have my firstborn three months  before my second deployment i have twins. so yeah you're drowning and  somebody hands you two babies. so now i got twins luckily i got to spend  some good time with them before i deployed. come back.

i'm i'm fixed i've had i've had my experiences my  wife's had her experiences dealing with you know. hearing what's going on on a deployment especially  all the injuries you know guys kind of coming back. lost in our platoon and so i'm having this  conversation with my command on what i want. to do next and my wife's having this conversation  with me on what she kind of wants to do next and.

he comes down from the head shed that hey it's  looking like we might split your platoon up. and shed some of this experience to the other  platoons and i remember hearing something along. the lines of and you guys will probably go  to the pi because we need to share the love. right you we want to get other guys experience  some of these deployments i was like man. if i deploy this is what i want  to i want to be doing this stuff. yeah you know i don't want to i don't want  to if i'm going to leave my kids and my wife.

again i need it i i want to go for a purpose  and not that what you guys are doing in the. pi doesn't serve a purpose it's just like it  wasn't the work that i wanted to do at the time. so i'm having this talk with my wife and she's  like bouncing babies and like screaming she's. like hey so uh you know do you do you think maybe  you'd be interested in doing a short duty instead. and i'm like let me see what let me see  what's out there and i had a couple buddies.

that i'd worked with on my first platoon um  my sister platoon chief was a second phase. platoon chief our second face chief and i kind  of called him up and emailed him and we had a. good chat he's like hey man if you if you want  to come to buds it's great opportunity the work. schedule is more balanced you kind of get your  your home life in order learn how to be a dad and. and it's a great it's a great job and a good  way to give back to the community and kind of.

come full circle with your career to this  point like all right you know i think i can do. if i did a shore duty i'd do my i try to cut  it do it as short as i could get my home life. in order and get to spend some time with my  kids getting to know them build a relationship. with them and uh and then i'd be able to go  back to the platoon and and probably i'd be. able to see what the different teams  were doing what the different platoons.

were doing and maybe kind of like jump in on a  platoon that's deploying somewhere interesting. and none of that went as planned. so you get home and look at these kids and i'm not  the dad that i thought i pictured i'd be come back. from deployment and you tell yourself like you  know i've had this experience i did a good job.

but for some reason my patience  level and my frustration and. my mercy and grace that i expect to have  with my children is just like not there. you know i feel completely disconnected from them  i'm always angry i have no patience for my wife.

and i'm like this isn't the dad i want to be  you know like this isn't the marriage i want. and you and you're like what like why why don't i  want to be home at all i just want to work like i. want to be i'd rather be a second like i'm going  to try to be at second phase as much as possible. you know just like focus i want to  have all like work dives and stuff.

and come home from a job no patience for my kids  short tempered raised my voice weight way more. than i should and you know we kind of talked  about that yesterday and then i was just like. man i wish i was i wish i  was more patient with them. how old was your oldest at that  time so he was born in 2014.

and this is 2017 for like three three years yeah. and dude i have like no pain like  it for three-year-old bro i'm like. and i'm like some not something's not right  here you know i need to talk like my wife's. telling me i'm super angry all the time i'm like  well i don't know i'll just i'll piece her i'll. go talk to the psych and that way at least she  knows like i'm get hey i'm talking to somebody. you know so i go into the psych and we start  talking and i'm just like telling him kind of.

explaining like what i am to you and i'm just  like sobbing you know like i don't love my kids. i'm never happy at home and he's like  dude this happens way more than you think. i'm like lock it up man like i don't like  i'm not supposed to be like this you know and.

i'm crying and i'm like why are we  talking about it you know like why. aren't we talking about like our home life  and working this stuff out in our community. it's how how prevalent is  divorce and how many guys. you like hear rumors or these stories about  but like nobody ever talks about it nobody. and. and it was nice because for the first time  i feel like i got to like kind of get back.

into the community i got to start talking to some  like get some mentors that weren't in the teams. you know guys in my church that were  like i considered like very wise. and i remember one of them telling me he looked at  i was explaining these feelings that i was having. and like i was like oh man i can't be  like i'm not really an angry person. i'm not an angry person i'm just i don't i  can't like navigate my own life for some reason. and i'm just trying to hack it and he's like let  me tell you something there's this guy named david.

you know the guy that killed goliath right  he's telling me about the story with him. and nathanael and he he tells us nathaniel's  telling david this story went just what just. happened was david had had an affair with one of  his soldiers wives he had sent his soldier off. on pretty much a suicide mission to die so  that he could take bathsheba you know this.

woman and he had told nathaniel this story and  the thing i was like let me tell you this story. he said there's a shepherd and he has  one sheep and he takes care of it and. he he eats at his table and he he bathes  it like you know it sleeps at his bed and. he loves the sheep and he's like and there's a  rich man he has a huge flock of sheep and you know.

he has more than he needs and he you know he takes  care of them but when it comes time to sacrifice. one of them he steals the sheep of the other man  and he slaughters him and keeps his sheep safe. he's like what do you think of this man he's like  oh man he should repay him you know 100 fold and. curse it as this man and nathaniel leans in  and looks at him he's like you are the man. right he's not like you are like him he  said you know this isn't like a situation.

that you're in it's like you are the man  and and to me what that said is like dude. i can say that i'm not an angry person all i  want i can say i'm not selfish i can't say that. i can say that like you know i can balance my  family life and this like desire for ownership. in my community and in my obsession for my my  reputation in the teams but like i am an angry man.

right like this is something that i've done  and and it's affecting my family right and if. and if in my ownership of the community  and in doing this job that i love. i destroy the thing that i'm trying to protect  like what needs to change right like if.

in protect in it if going out to these places  i'm i'm claiming that i'm protecting my family. and i'm protecting those that i love but  i but when i come home i'm destroying it. how do i how do you balance that you know. and so that's kind of like it's like i need to set  i need a lot more work than i thought i'd need for.

my family and i'm like i love i love these kids  i love my wife and i need a i need a reset right. and i i feel i know and i know that there  are great guys in the community that have. awesome families you know and they make it  work but i just felt like there was this. level of obsession for me that i was like i  just want to keep going and doing that job.

but i could see that i was it was  damaging my home you know what i mean yeah. and so i knew if i go back to the platoon and  start chasing that again it's just gonna it's. gonna get worse at home and i don't and i don't  know how to balance i don't know if i'm i have the. self-control to to balance it you know so i felt  like i really just had to kind of make a choice.

and. it's it's a tough line you know it really is. on one hand you're feeding an addiction you're  feeding an obsession you love what you do. on the other hand you're destroying  everything at home and then. the same you know the same token you  justify because you're doing what needs. to be done for the best of the country  yeah you know what i mean and and so.

you have that to carry with you to justify why  you want to go back more more more more and. it it you know it just it's a cycle man it never  ends yeah it's never gonna be enough you can have. you can do the coolest sausage rescue mission in  the world and you'll want to do another one yeah.

and that's something that i feel like i had a  taste a like a good taste of combat right and. in iraq and i think a lot of guys if i they hear  this story they're like dude i just i would like. a deployment like that and i'd be good i'm like  no you will not no you will always want more like. you always want more man and and i recognize that  myself i'm like how much of this is actually about.

me doing this job as opposed to me just being  selfishly wanting more right and you have to. get real with yourself and i'm like okay  like i'm checking myself a little bit here. and so i have a conversation with my wife it's  like you know hey i'm gonna look around and see. what it looks like i'm gonna start to i'll talk to  some people but i don't know if i can get out like. i don't know if it's i don't know if  there's anything else for me you know.

because every. every team guy. that gets out i i i say every it's an exaggeration  perhaps i know a lot of guys know something that. they want to do and so they switch and they  get out like i want to be a doctor now so. i want to be an astronaut um but i think  for a lot of guys that feel that calling. that pool to like maybe it's time to do  something else they have a really hard time.

finding something that they're as passionate about  as they did when they knew that they wanted to. be a navy seal or they wanted to like  do great things for the country you know. and so for me is i was thinking you know  if i can find something like that like. like i'll put my hands out there and  if god put something there then like. like i'll i'll take the sign you  know but it's like i just don't know.

anything so we can talk about it but  if there's nothing that comes our way. so i guess i have to provide for my family too  you know i can't just get out without a plan and. yeah mess everything up even more because now  i'm miserable right and working a job i hate. i haven't figured anything out but uh so i start  instructing doing this instructor deal and i was.

driving a bus or something and i remember my back  like i backed up and i kind of clipped a vehicle. um some like random parked car and that was like  parked in the middle of the road or something and. i went over looked at the vehicle the taillight  was busted found the guy i was like hey man. i i hate your car and he's like oh dude don't  even worry about it i think that is pretty.

messed up already anyway it's like okay cool i  went back you know i'm doing damage control like. all right i don't want i want the master chief no  my chief knows start reporting to him i'm like hey. chief just once you know i clipped a car  i'm going to write a little report for you. what happened so like if you know how crappy  that stuff is with g yeah like like the what. is the vehicle debt they get super poopy pants  if they hear something or a report or whatever.

that they didn't know about so i go to the master  chief's office i'm like hey master chief just want. to let you know i a little fender bender guy's  totally cool with it i'm writing a report for it. i'm gonna let um transportation now um  based security knows it's all clear he's. like all right man cool thanks and  i look over on his desk and his like. sick trident statue you know it's a big old  like kind of bronze eagle and his wings are. wrapped he has this he's holding the trident in  the flintlock and i was like that's a sick statue.

and i left his office i was like man that's  really cool i wonder where he got that thing. it's like i can never have some i don't have a  place for a statue that big i said but i wonder if. i could draw it or paint it or something you know  i've been like kind of thinking about getting back. into a hobby it's like i'm gonna try i'm gonna  try painting it you know i don't know it's just. like this thing in my mind i was like i'm just  gonna do it i'm gonna i'm gonna get back into.

some painting or something and on the way  home i swung by hobby lobby bought a bunch of. acrylics bought a little canvas while my wife is  watching netflix i'm googling like eagle picture. like finding a trident and anchor and i'm just  kind of like hodge podge draw this thing out. i paint this picture and yeah it was like  two nights of watching netflix or something. and i kind of hold it back like dude i  painted a picture you know and it felt like.

awesome like i made something and i showed my wife  she's like that's pretty good you know i was like. thank you it's like the cat that killed a bird  you know it's like proud of the little bird that i. killed i'm like showing my wife sending a picture  to my you know my buddy my dad like nice work man. that's sick and i'm like yeah i'm gonna bring  in the office i'm gonna put in the office so i.

stick it in my office table because i'm sticking  in there when my other instructor buds walk in and. he's like that's a sweet picture where do you get  that like i painted that he's like you painted i. said i painted that you know he's like bro that's  pretty good and somebody hears us out in the hall. he's like who painted something i was like i  painted this picture he's like dude i want one. i said sorry man there's only one he's like what  let me get a print i was like uh what do i do for.

that it's like well you get a nice picture of it  and then you can hire somebody and they'll print. out like a high quality photo of it said okay  okay i'll do it i was like just pay me whatever. it costs to print it like all right i'll pay you  more than that man i was like no just you know. so i take a picture of it i print it out. and i give you know i bring it in  the office like here's 100 bucks man. i was like what he said yeah dude take it i'd  pay you more i said dude thanks so much that's.

really nice you don't have to pay me 100 bucks  100 bill you know like thank you he's like dude. take it he's like i'm not taking it back i said  okay thank you put it in my pocket another guy. comes in and we're kind of like talking about the  picture and he's like where'd you get that picture. i'm like i painted it and he's like he  painted this he's like he's like i want one. you know and so dude before you know it's like  the team guy grapevine and i have like a stack.

of these things at my house and well he's  like well how much are they i look at him. he looks at me i'm like 100 bucks he's like  all right you know all right so i started. printing dudes are coming to me they're like hey  you're the guy selling the trident pictures like. yeah it's like you really painted that thing i  said yeah i did like nice man it's like i want. one and then you know the wives are like trying  to pick them up for their husbands they're seeing.

them at parties or something reaching out on  the wife's you know little pages and stuff and. so i started kind of selling these things and one  day my wife's like hey this lady just bought one. and she said her husband's  like master chief or something. and uh i'm like dude that's master  chief so and so i was like oh shoot. and what was he like the master of the command  yeah he was well yeah he was master chief of.

buds and then he switched over and he was like  they were looking at him for like mick pond. master chief of the navy yeah master chief petty  officer of the navy oh [ __ ] yeah so he's like. kind of a big deal in the community yeah i was  like shoot dude what's this guy going to think. and dude that day i hear knock  knock knock at the door look out. on my cousin and he's at my front door and  i'm like oh man here we go i'm in trouble.

or something like painting these paint i don't  know i don't know what i did wrong you know. and i'm like all right go over open the door i'm  like hey master chief he's like are you hughes. say yes master chief he's like you painted that  picture huh i said yes master chief i i did i said. did you get one he's like yeah my wife just  got one for me he's like can i come in he said.

yes master chief he steps in he's  like dude that is bad ass man i'm like. you know i was like you like it he's like yeah man  he's like what he's like have you always been able. to do this i was like dude i started drawing and  this is like the first thing i've ever painted. he's like you gotta do something with this man i  said you think he's like yes he's like you need to. do something with this painting thing i said well  thank you it's like what else are you working on.

like well i just started this painting of the dell  you know checking out that's amazing like dude i. don't know what your plans are if you ever get  out you got to do something with this pain stuff. and i was like it clicked it's like all my  childhood drawing you know it my experience. in teams it's like dude i got to do  something with this painting thing.

you got that painting i got the paint can i yeah  now it's time to show it yeah let's see it so this. is it man i don't know what the i don't know what  the best camera angle is or if people can see it. but uh yeah i mean it was like you know kind  of threw it together like turned out way. better than you'd think right for dude's first  painting so that painting basically represents. a life-changing event yeah it's like this is  where it all started for that's incredible and uh.

yeah dude it set me on a freaking crazy path. that is definitely a lot of i mean yeah dude it's  crazy it's a blessing like i can't like i don't. know where this stuff comes from like the only  thing i think is you know in my world view the way. i view is like dude this is like a gift from god  for me you know and yeah i felt so blessed that i.

was like dude i have a direction you know now what  now what do i do with it like how do you become. an artist and do i say i want to be an artist  like is that a real thing like i don't really. what is an artist as a team that i look like  i can't talk about being a navy seal and be an. artist you know that's not that's taboo in my  community it's like i don't think i can make a. living off this i don't think anybody can you make  a living off of being an artist like what is it. like this whole world opened up to me  yeah that i was suddenly interested in.

and you know i whispered to my wife i'm like  maybe i could paint or do some kind of something. artistic well uh why don't we get into some  of that right now let's see what your work is. all right so this is the first masterpiece that  you painted and um so just real quick i just. wanted to tell the audience you know i picked this  picture this was a real tough decision uh for me.

because there's so i got a ton of good  pictures and i wasn't it was either this. one or there's one of me in a helicopter  like looking out in afghanistan but which. is actually i think a better photo but i picked  this photo because i think this is a very good. kind of story description it's a good visual of of  what goes on on a seal mission at least the ones.

i've been on yeah you know and i'm just being  like totally honest here but this is like your. typical sniper hide you know we did my platoon  we did a lot of sniper stuff in baghdad and. 90 percent of it is actually 99 of it is being  bored watching a target keeping each other awake.

[ __ ] cracking jokes playing grab ass  that's exactly what's that you know and. one percent of it is actually killing bad guys  you know and so i just i thought this was like. the perfect depiction of what happens you  know i got our aw here automatic weapons guy. he's literally grabbing my ass trying  to get me to smile for the photo. i'm looking back at the camera my other  sniper partners taking the picture.

i still keep in touch with this guy and he's  yawning probably getting ready to fall asleep. there's gear you know around helmet  with nods on over there this is. whoops gun i have to bleep that but um but  yeah that's you know this is just this is how. it is nobody's watching the target and yeah yeah  nobody's watching the target which is back here.

moment and uh and this screen you know the screen  is basically it's it's concealment you know you. can't really see through that looking from afar  which means nobody's gonna think anything's. suspicious and it doesn't look like a screen's  just hanging there it just looks like shadows. you know from a distance but i just you know i  thought that was a good depiction of what a seal.

operation is and it's it's a lot of dark humor a  lot of grab ass a lot of keeping each other awake. and everything i just described and and man you  just painted it perfectly you know once i want to. put up the picture that the actual picture that  i sent you and this looks ten times pretty good. right then the picture that i sent you the picture  i sent you was all washed out overexposed and. made a little bit more dramatic yeah but it's all  i mean the detail that it's just i mean the brick.

the right everything yeah you can even tell i  mean the camera picks up on facial recognition. thanks you know and this guy right here like  it the faces are just it's insane thanks i mean. thank you man but just tell me a little bit  about pain then yeah i mean so for me first.

looking at this image you know resonates and it  was really cool just to capture this moment where. you know this is team guys always find a  way to kind of like coke and joke and find. the positive in like kind of a crappy situation  so it's just cool to kind of capture and paint. like the dynamic of moods right because  you're a little bit more like this is like. a more of a dramatic pose you're hunched  over you're looking back at the camera. almost candid right and it's like you're just  catching inside of it and these two guys are like.

kind of getting you and getting you in  the picture and it's just this moment that. seems like it's so that it's so improved right  and then painting it man dude it was a it was a. grind on this one just because the amount of  detail right and everything from the bricks. to this drapery over his legs to the camo pants  man the boots it's like the rocks the backpack.

the gosh dadgum see-through mesh you know and you  i don't know if you can probably see it on the. camera but you perhaps saw it in the picture it's  like there's vehicles driving in the background. here yeah and uh just as an artist it was very  challenging to capture that without like losing. the detail right because the temptation is just  kinda like i'm just gonna paint it one color. kind of paint these vehicles and then i'll like  miss it and next mix up some kind of mesh design.

but just really doing the picture justice and  what you guys were doing up there was like really. important to me so just capture as much of it  as i could and that was the goal setting out and. i think uh i think it turned out pretty pretty  dang i'm good yeah i'm pretty proud of it man. i'm proud of it i mean i didn't even do it i'm  proud of it and i everybody that comes in here. i'm like look at this look at this [ __ ] can  you believe this guy painted this he's only.

been paid for a year yeah and uh it's just  i mean and it's cool it tells it tells to me. it doesn't get any more accurate than this with  with the detail and the story behind it it's just. it's just incredible yeah sorry  man that's what it's all about. let's move on to the next one so i gave you  this picture this is me at cia this is yemen. and i just thought it was really cool because it's  in the moment and this is at a cop market those.

of you that don't know cot is like cocaine in  yemen supposedly and right yeah and uh it's just. the detail you did on this is phenomenal i  can see the outline of my gun right there. and you know a lot of people think working for  the agency that you you blend in perfectly with. the populace you know no matter where you're at  and that's just not the case you know and so a.

lot of it's finding a different cover to work  under whether you're a business guy whether. you're working for another government agency  maybe you're an arms dealer maybe you're a. drug smuggler you know and and a guy with my skin  complexion and tattoos and you know i'm not going. to blend in i don't speak the language even if i  did speak the language i'd have a horrible accent. and so you know it would be worthless for me  to kind of dress up like that and blend in and.

conduct espionage you know and so i thought  this picture kind of painted a more accurate. yeah painted a more action accurate picture yes  i like it but humor of what it is you know over. there and and you know some guys do dress up in  the garm you know i've dressed up in a tube but. usually when you do that it's kind of you know  you're just trying to get by first glance maybe.

you're in a maybe you're in a in a car that's  somebody quick yeah you know nobody's gonna pay. you know it's just a quick glance nobody's gonna  notice the difference but when you're out on the. street that [ __ ] is not gonna cut it because the  minute you get stopped and plus it's so cultural. over there right you know that we won't pick up on  things like you're like that knife that they carry. over the jumbo ring you know this guy right right  here it's tucked in you can see it yeah you carry.

it the wrong way and it's like a dead giveaway  it's like that guy definitely does it doesn't. belong here yeah and so the way they wear this  like the way they fold it and wrap it and tuck. it it's all yeah it'll mean something mirror  you might not know yeah but they know they do. and so and so can it could be more detrimental  to try to look like them than than like that. but anyways how was it painting this man this  one just compared to the other you can alr you.

can already tell that there's elements to it that  are much more not abstract but more impressionist. right so you got like the these curtains here  like the the tent roofs you i mean just trash. all over the ground you got these bags of cot and  when you get an image that is a little bit more. like there's a lot more white and less contrast  between some of these elements it gives you an. opportunity as an artist to use a little bit of  texture to tell the story instead of just you know.

on a digital image it's just flat color right  so it as it's from for me it was a lot of fun. just getting to mess with some of some of those  elements right even in in the texture in your. in your shirt here this guy's jacket so you know  you started out just painting kind of a monotone. color just getting everything in placement then  you build layer upon layer on upon later and and.

for this one especially compared to the last  one i felt like i could cut loose a lot more. and use my paint brush and show some of those  bolder paint paint strokes and it made it an. absolute blast to paint and i mean there wasn't a  moment when i was painting this that i wasn't like. excited to get on the easel and and get to working  on it and like you said dude it's like so candid. the look is so similar to the other one so it ties  them together you know and the fact that it's you.

and two separate um work environments it's very  pretty rad but you can see the similarity like. if you put them side by side like that's sean  ryan yeah and and that's pretty sick and just the. i feel like the cultural element too it just  speaks a lot it like there's so much there. man like that it just seems so yeah it seems so  natural yeah that is like that is yemen exactly.

in the [ __ ] markets this whole thing went up  sick like right after that i bought that too. that was like some argument it was like a little  but um but dude i'm just like amazed at the. experience you get the talent and the detail and  it's just it's it's it's incredible like every. time i look at this and the other one is just it's  insane thank you you're able to do that thank you. so yeah i want to put like the actual raw image  of what i sent you on the screen right now yeah.

so that everybody can see so this is the raw image  this is the actual photo that he painted and then. and then this is what he turned it  into it's it's it's amazing dude but. which one did you like painting more dude i like  different elements of each right so the first one. i loved that there were team guys in the  picture i love that there are some kind of.

trade craft elements with the screen um dude  this kind of stuff's fun to paint like these. faces are really cool and i kind of got a bigger  portrait of you so that was really fun to paint. but i have to hand it to the other images i  think it's my favorite like seeing them both. here side by side yeah i think yeah it's  just because like that seems like my group. you know yeah and maybe it's just because this  wasn't my experience in yemen as much like i.

i got to go down to the cop markets in the  weapon market and and dabble a little bit but um. it wasn't as dynamic of a experience for me  yeah as it was for you like miami time was. kind of like not as exciting so i i see this and  i'm like i can relate a lot more with that you. know so it's kind of i could see that this is  this is it's too like it's they're so similar. to careers but so so different it's wild how  just deploying to two separate countries can.

totally change the operation right and  like completely change the dynamic um. of how you work right yeah i think you're  kind of doing the same thing but it's. completely different it's yeah that and then and  then just the difference from being a seal to. working for the agency like  there's a lot of similarities. but you can't even compare the two because they're  they're still so different but dude once again.

i mean amazing work thank you sean that's  incredible it was an absolute pleasure to. do and thanks for trusting me with part of  your history well thank you for for doing it. well justin your art is i'm just blown away  by your raw talent it's i mean it is it's. just [ __ ] incredible uh that that all came  from that that small trident painting and now.

you've got stuff that's i mean there's not a doubt  in my mind you're going to be in a museum but what. so where are you going next what's next for  you um man right now i'm working on my first. real series of paintings and i i kind of hope  to be done with that by the end of next year. i have a couple commissions lined up that  i'm really interested in but uh but really.

i'm trying to kind of take some of that that  warrior archetype that i'm coming from and and. seeing if i can translate that and tell tell a  story through another another medium right and. i think that with paint sometimes it's hard to  like like if i could write it or like if i could.

put a script together or something i i'd  probably do it that way but like pain is. just my medium for storytelling right and  in passing legacy and and telling history. right and so if i can do that for  some of the guys in the community. uh specifically guys that i've worked with  then that's kind of like the direction that i.

that i went ahead with my art and so i'm kind of  working on a series of paintings based loosely off. kind of like what what that looks like and to me  and telling that story if i can i can't wait to. see what you come up with thank you very much your  work is phenomenal and uh and i just you know well. i just want to say your journey just blew  me away the childhood stuff yeah i totally.

i was not expecting any of that and i think that  that could be an entire i think that could be an. entire episode in itself and then to see how  things have kind of come full circle for you. you know you went from that to i mean which  sounds like in your childhood sound it's like. it was the life of a spec ops guy and then  you go into spec ops you become a seal.

your deployments you know especially the one. and mosul where you're a jtac fighting  isis right on the front lines i mean that's. that's some heavy [ __ ] and then to come home get  through that i i've been watching you i interacted. with you and your wife last night your kids  seem really cool and uh i mean you just got a.

great family life and the the art that you're  producing is or that you're painting is just. i'm just really happy for you man thanks so  much you know it's it's really cool to see. i love watching people succeed and and you've  definitely found your passion and thank you so. much man and uh i just you know it's a it's it's  really cool to watch that it's a blessing yeah. how can people find you uh right now i'm  most active on instagram Justin use art.

and i also have a website justinezr.com if you're  interested in commissions you can hit me up on. messenger on instagram messenger or i have  a little page on my website that is probably. like the best section because you can write more  on what you're interested in having painted but. yeah reach out to me connect with me out there  i'm pretty active all right well once again i just. it's it was a real honor to interview you i've  been looking forward to this for a long time and.

that's quite the story thanks so much  sean dude it's an absolute honor to be. here thank you so much for having me an honor  to you know paint these pictures of you and. and create a legacy for your future generations  right your kids and help tell your story. in a different medium those will be passed  down from generation to generation in my family. it's crazy to think about it's cool well  best of luck to you thanks sean cheers.

you.