Family Life, Relationships, Bollywood & Kabaddi - Abhishek Bachchan On Figuring Out115 | Raj Shamani
do you feel relationship is a lot more. work it doesn't have to be if you're in. a relationship with the right people. there is a little bit of a work. adjustment in everything but if you're. with the right person that'll be minimal. and if it's a lot of work then you're. with the wrong person. I don't like that okay what's your take. on this uh living with your parents I. cannot think of not living with my.
parents they've taken care of you when. you are not able to take care of. yourself so you need to be around for. them as well why is most of the actors. around the world and celebrities they're. always late. welcome back to another episode of. figuring out episode. and we have tried to understand his take. on how to make money in the movie.
industry plus his relationship with his. father. foreign. today's episode is about maintaining. relationships.
understanding how to make money as a. celebrity and learning about new things. so that you can Inspire the next. generation of people as well. please enjoy today's show and before you. enjoy the show please go subscribe. rajamani clips and rajamani shorts. Channel cookies. um. enjoy the show.
welcome to figuring out thank you you. know there are a lot of similarities. between you and me which I recently. found out like while I was coming here. okay first was this.
I guess so I mean just. sister no I enjoy it I love watches okay. um. I would have loved to be a watchmaker. really yeah I used to work with Omega. watches as the brand ambassador for. almost 15 years. and they introduced me to the world of. watchmaking precision time keeping so. I'm actually intrigued by a lot of the. movements oh and I find it very amazing.
I mean watchmakers the intricacies which. they work with and. um so I just yeah I love my watches. which one of the watch you believe is. one of your best investments. um hard to choose from a babies but. choose one I don't know if it's my best. investment but I have three very special. watches okay one was the watch I wore. when I got married. one was the watch I was wearing when my. daughter was born which is the most. special. and. um.
one was the watch I wore to the premiere. of my first film. wow so for me my watches have to be an. emotion. it can't be I don't I mean I like I said. you can look at watches as a good. investment today I don't. uh for me it's about a memory and that. makes it invaluable for me. so that the value for that is something. a lot more for me for me it's um it's. always an emotion yeah it's an emotion. okay fun thing I hope you remember this. as well one day absolutely man both of.
them both of them yeah okay you've been. surrounded by women in your life yes and. they have had a huge influence yes. absolutely because you've been very. close to your mother your sister your. wife not your daughter and I've had a. similar kind of thing I've been. fortunately or unfortunately I've been. always very close to my mom my sisters. you know always been like that I've had. a luxury in life to understand the. feminine side sure of my own energy as.
well right so I wanted to understand. from you because you've been always seen. as this very very. High ethics code person who always. respect women your your images like that. you it's I I get something for my mom. um. there's certain values. that I see my mother live by. um like honor loyalty. which sadly principles.
which sadly a field of values we we may. be losing. slowly slowly. relationship. I don't like that and that's because. I've seen my mother like that for my. father I get disciplined Duty. a sense of his sense of Duty is immense. and I feel somewhere where we're trading. these values in. to whatever I am today is because of my.
family and the people around it you know. um I could go home one day and be very. cheesed off with you know work this that. and I said to the eshwari and you know. you you vent as you would with your with. your partner. but she just has this amazing calming. effect then she just gives you a unique. perspective she's so Zen about certain. things you know she's on a different. spiritual plane to most other people and. she says something I'm like.
yeah she's right you know why am I. getting so bothered about this there's. so much more important things to be. bothered about. so you know the influence of of women in. my life has been immense and they're. generally more sorted out than we guys. are I mean let's be very honest they are. the superior race they're far better. than us they're better equipped and um. and the more you lean on them on them. the better can you give me an example. where you felt this where you said you. said use three words right now and I.
want to go one by one on all of them I. want to understand an example right one. you said that loyalty and you learned. that from your mother was there a point. where you felt where maybe your mother. told you that hey you gotta be loyal or. you're going to be this or whether. you've seen some things have never done. that you know how did you get this my. father never really disciplined me my. father till date hasn't raised his hands. ever on my sister and me never in a. childhood. never but they always led by example and.
I think that's the best thing a parent. can do you you a parent doesn't need to. be a good teacher we have teachers in. school they need to be the correct. example for their children. um can you lead your life through. example. um my father has always done that my. mother has always done that I see my. mother's loyalty to her near and dear. ones I see my father's sense of Duty. honor discipline on a daily basis.
you have to practice it so you saw it. yes and that's how it happened. absolutely I still see it okay and then. you said the second thing which was. angry and this which is a very normal. phenomena and your wife told you this. hey why are you worried right is there. any example that you could share that. this happened with you I mean I mean you. can come back and you can be irritated. about anything you know nowadays if. you're in Mumbai you're irritated about.
the traffic you know yeah. and sometimes she's like. what what are you getting so hyper about. calm down you know they're more. important things I mean you've come home. and you have a healthy happy family I. remember once she she said this to me um. and it really hit me I said this was. during um kovid. um. my father my wife my daughter and I were.
all in hospital at the same time. and she said you know. when we slowly we got discharged one by. one and I was the last one to come home. I was in Hospital for almost a month. she said you know we're so lucky that. we're all still here there's so many. families that have been ravaged. um by covert and we're very lucky. and what's more important than that and. how's like you know you're right because. I was thinking. you know guys are we we need to be up.
and about yeah you know because you sit. at home and. and she said you've got a healthy family. what. what more can. you want and I was like wow that's. that's so true you know. um. whenever I'm asking you know oh how's. the family. they're they're healthy I think we it. you know she just puts those priorities. into place and that was I mean I thought. it was amazing for her to say when I. thought about it do you feel that all.
guys are mostly like they're always. thinking about next objective yes of. course we're gold driven no yeah we're. golden we're not the type who can sit by. a brook and enjoy the sound of water and. birds chirping apartment. that's oh historically yes you see we're. wired like that okay when we were. cavemen get up and go get the food and. come back. we're going to sit and chill and say oh. somebody come and Sabertooth tiger come. and bite your head off you know so I.
think men are gold driven we need. something to do every 15 minutes yeah. you're always so guys are like that true. that's true you know I was watching an. interview then he says men usually don't. go out and make plans. let's catch up for tea and we'll talk. yeah talk about what exactly agenda. agenda yeah they always want to know. agenda the agenda can be let's sit meet.
the pop meet for a drink and watch the. football match yeah just meet and do. what yeah so true wow what else did he. say no this this is one of the major. insights there's a whole book about it. guys. foreign.
[Music]. do you work do you feel like. okay talk about relationship a bit more. do you feel relationship is a lot more. work than you ever thought of it doesn't. have to be if you're in a relationship. with the right people okay explain I.
always think that relationship it means. work if you're not interested. thankfully your your oblongata whatever. is there to make sure that but otherwise. you have to be conscious of these things. and to walk all that yeah there is a. little bit of a work adjustment in. everything but if you're with the right. person that'll be minimal and if it's a. lot of work then you're with the wrong. person. some way I think either with time or. just the way you are you getting along.
is also about they understand each other. you know like. I mean I think parents are the wrong. example because I mean. you come from them so obviously but any. relationships apart from your blood. relations that you get into. yeah I mean like with my wife I know. sometimes she just gets it you know I. think a lot of that has to do because. she's also an actor herself so she. understands the pressure of the business. and the lifestyle but a lot of other.
stuff you also get but yes there are. times when you have to make an effort. and and work at it but hopefully that. should be kept at a minimum what's what. do you find the most difficult thing. about your relationship what about you. as a person in a relationship me yeah. apparently I'm very moody is it that's. what I'm told all the time. my mood swings up and down so yeah. sometimes I'm really happy and then. sometimes I'm just like this I don't. know. I think I'm pretty cool guy I'm okay fun. to be around yeah from the fire you look. like you're always cool and calm and.
composed yeah you should you should ask. my manager over there she's the one who. spends maximum time with me and gets all. the firing for no reason she looks at me. like you but what did I do so maybe I. don't know maybe I think actors are all. very erratic child Kiki always. experimenting I don't know I mean maybe. just because of what we do we're just. slightly off. actors are very notoriously known for. one thing okay tell me answers so I. wanna know this why is most of the. actors around the world and celebrities.
they're always late. why do you feel so I don't think so now. I've noticed this so many times you just. meet the wrong people I guess. they're on time usually but my family is. the people I've worked with usually are. and I feel this younger generation today. of actors are very conscientious of time. my father told me when I was a kid if. you don't respect time time's not going. to respect you. um.
and if you're getting delayed for. something which is out of your control. you must inform you can't just take it. for granted don't don't take other. people's time for granted okay what's. your take on this uh living with your. parents because now it's becoming more. of a trend you do do you still live with. your parents yes now it's becoming more. of a trend that you want to move out. live alone I get it and especially the. moody people you're saying that you're. more ideas I get it see um. Society culture values everything.
changes and adapts I get it in today's. fast-paced life. if you're living in a city like Mumbai. you have very little time for family I. mean I get it. um. I might not do it I. cannot think of not living with my. parents especially at the age at which. they are now my father is going to be 81. my mother 75. so you want to be around. them you want to take care of them if. you can both my parents thankfully are. very active and and independent.
um but still you know when. they've taken care of you when you were. not able to take care of yourself so you. need to be around for them as well. look at all the sacrifices each and. every one of our parents have made for. us and quietly they've never. all they want is to just know the kids. are okay. and I think part of Indian culture is. also.
is a joint family system. and like today I know although come with. yesterday and there could be times when. we don't see each other for days living. under the same roof keep all different. timings but the fact that it is. I like that I like the fact that you. have that one meal where everybody sits. at docks and you know or an evening. where the rare evening. you know. watch something together whatever it's. so nice that I'm I'm so lucky that even.
at the age of 47 I get to enjoy both my. parents yeah you know. um there's so many people so many. friends of mine who don't have both sets. of parents. and um I think very lucky that I'd want. to take care of them and enjoy their. company and. appreciate and learn from them till date. as long as I can you know I want to ask. something very personal. um it's about relationship between a. father and a son G right usually when.
you're growing up. there's a little man ego in you sure. where you want to like I wanna become. better than my father I want to become. bigger than my father I don't want to be. overshadowed I'll have my own story you. know and mostly usually in today's world. where kids have everything when they. have everything they want to get out of. their family and start everything from. scratch because they have this little. ego like memory story you never thought. of it I mean I understand why they would. do that.
I think that comes from the fact for a. son. that the gold standard for any son is. his father They're Your Heroes yeah 100. percent so I I get that it's like this. is the best now I have to be better so I. understand that healthy competition and. every human being is like that that's. fine it shouldn't become unhealthy. for me I've never looked upon it as a. ego tussle key. foreign. for me it's about how can I best try and.
further his legacy. that's the perspective I look at it. um this my surname. is sacred to me. I am whatever I am today because of my. surname. which was. given to me by my grandfather. and then my father did a fantastic job. of furthering that name. and the dignity. associated with it I've always said it's.
my duty as his son to further that. Legacy and not compromise those things. because they've worked very hard to. achieve that so I've never looked at. life in that way. um. AR. um. I hope I pray. it very seldom happens but I hope. that after my father watches it he's. proud. I hope my mother's proud they feel okay.
our son is doing good work he's making a. name for himself and helping the family. name these things matter a lot to me. [Music]. um. you know I see my wife teach that to my. daughter. I mean we don't want to put pressure on. her that oh there's all this pressure. but you must be respectful of what. your father your dadaji and your dadaji. have also done and achieved and you must. respect that.
and you must work. never do anything to deplete that so. that's the way I look at it I've never. had that kind of ego tussle with my dad. how can I help. try and grow what you've done such a. wonderful job of of doing do you think. that that also comes because maybe you. and your father you guys are very vocal. about. complementing each other or appreciating. each other we're not actually we're not.
neighbors. but I think he's just being you know a. proud father yeah but in face to face. we're normal he doesn't come and tell. you hey I love you. does that happen or is like it's very. difficult to have a conversation no no. that way we're emotionally very good. with each other I mean we're hugging. kind of a family and yeah that he does. he's not going to go crazy about it but. um yeah he makes you feel very special.
are you do you feel difficult in showing. the love uh to your parents or not at. all right I'm a very yeah I'm a very. loving kind of. very tactile and I'm like that yeah. because it's a so I. I'll tell you okay my story with my. father my father is a business person. and I built another business together so. sure it's just what happened it I was. always just trying to get his validation. of course like always I told you why.
because there are heroes yeah we might. not admit it but there are heroes and. you want your hero to say job well done. exactly and that never happened until. recently so I always always like wow. that must have been amazing huh I know. right I will never forget. the first time my father appreciated my. work. it's one of my most special and. Treasured Memories of all time. and I mean I I didn't think of it that. way but for any son subconsciously it's. like I said it's yeah it's the greatest.
gift that you can ever get because when. your parent or your father. appreciates what you've done a hundred. percent. on another level I also feel fathers are. the world's worst teachers why they just. pulled rank on you know. you know what I'm saying yeah men are. not very good at explaining. you know I'm telling you to do it just. do it and you're like me but Q don't ask. questions I feel fathers are not good. teachers no they're better examples. that's why I said you know it's.
important that you lead by example a a. parent might I don't think they'll be. very good teachers. damn because we're so close to that. emotion right you're so protective and. possessive. um like so your father must it is. actually so emotional protective and. possessive about you you're his child. you're his next Generation you know. after a while you're not able to you. know you get frustrated because I so I. don't think fathers can be very good. teachers so the best teacher you can be.
as a parent is to just lead by example I. never thought of it yeah it's it's very. true it is because this is what exactly. would happen if my father has to say. something he'll say it a one or two. times I know it for you correct correct. if you ask a question why are you asking. me I've told you something just do it. because it it's not coming from a bad. place I think they you know we just. aren't able to after a while.
I'm never going to think ill for you so. why are you questioning me um. and I think each. newer generation the one thing they all. do is question yeah because that whole. sense of hierarchy is hardly there is. a question what do you mean hierarchy. we're all just saying talk to me like an. equal does that happen does your. daughter question you about things which.
is all the time she's too young no she's. 11 now but they're 11 going on 25 all of. them this generation is amazing no you. can't put rank on her yeah and um on a. certain level that's nice. you can't say I'm your dad just do it. her response is I'm your daughter you do. it. how do you argue that. you know what I'm saying it's so true. that's a fair argument I'll start. playing that card on my dad now yeah. okay so I want to keep it very.
free-flowing about your business Acumen. sure about the business I have no. business Acumen really yeah I studied. economics in in high school and I was. horrible at it I don't think I have any. business Acumen what are you saying all. my business decisions have been. completely counter-intuitive to whatever. I was taught uh business should be like. give me an example what was so countered. intuitive well one of the first Ventures. I did uh on my own was to buy a kabaddi. team.
or jab. um. foreign.
vibrant and fast and. I said yeah this is fantastic and I. believe that people will want to watch. this. it's just you know if an instinct you. have. so there's no data just gut feeling well. the only data I had is when when. we were kind of doing a sort of due. diligence of sorts um.
I told my dear friend Bunty Walia who. runs the team with me I said yeah life. covered. there was one tournament going on yeah. and I went and there was this bit made. stands and there were some 10 000 people. cheering. I said and this energy was unbelievable. so somewhere I felt can you passion.
and you know you're something that. started off on a shoestring budget today. is is valued in hundreds of crores it's. it's it's fantastic what's the multiple. you made on it see that's another thing. I never count my multiples until I. actually offload anything. evaluation. this is for how far we have come.
there actually it's more than 100x right. now sweet and how many years it took you. 10 years not bad not bad not bad that's. insane that's that's how crazy. yeah that's I mean it's it's crazy but. like I said you only realize that once. you sell I I I'm not a big believer in. people in in paper digital money there. has to be in your pocket yeah boy you. know we're Indians how much is in the. bank tell me that. okay you know one thing which I.
really want to understand is about the. movies okay which your recent movie have. you been close to sport right and now. you're becoming this person like. motivator I would rather say oh really. like in a movie is it are you not he's a. coach yeah he's a coach right coach is. technically someone who's yes helping. you realize your own potential. absolutely yeah I mean I guess they're. the ultimate mentors and motivators yeah. so are you inspired or like when you.
were doing this film or when you started. on day one did you have anyone in your. head no he's a very unique personality. uh Paddy which is the character I play. padam Singh sodi he's a very unique. person and his his approach to coaching. is a bit unorthodox okay and very. against what you'd expect it to be and. once you see the film you'll realize. that but. um he's a very candid. Brash harsh rude almost insensitive.
person which you can see it jalak saw. that in the trailer. but actually when you see the film. you'll understand that there's a greater. reason for that. is that what was the most. hard fact for you to take personality. um I mean I enjoyed it he's a great. character to play he's a lot of fun he's. very unpredictable. [Music]. to just just fascinated there was.
nothing specific you're like oh this. happened no I liked I mean it's very. difficult for me to quantify and explain. it to you until you don't see the film. um we talk after you watch the film and. then we can discuss this in detail which. one is your favorite part in the movie. The quite a few tell me one I I wouldn't. want to talk about a particular moment. I'll I'll talk about a certain trait. that Balki my director has okay. but very lightly.
so. there are a lot of themes and. messaging that he's said in the film but. oh it's not made a big deal out of it's. very subtlety and you might just come. out of them say oh gosh actually yeah. that's right for me to give you an. example. 's character has got one arm and he pays. scant respect to the fact that she's got. one arm and what all difficulties she. must be going through just to be able to. say ball um. thank you I'll make you you know a left.
arm uh spinner. but he doesn't care about. uh. yeah chill out yeah. you realize who the film is he's. treating her just like a normal athlete. and his attitude is. the greatest service I can do to. somebody who's maybe handicapped is to. treat them normally yeah because they. want to be normal. yeah so he doesn't care if you're a boy.
or a girl you have one hand you have two. hands do the work because there's. somebody else doing the work out there. and they'll do better than you and you. have to do better. so he believes in her in that level he's. you know he sees the potential in her. and he says I'm not going to allow. anything to become either emotional. crutch or a physical crutch for you. foreign.
approach yeah. so whereas initially you think God this. guy is really rude and insensitive. actually he's not he's very sensitive to. what she has he sees the potential and. he's pushing her and actually instilling. with more confidence that start treating. yourself. like just like everyone else. yeah. do you do that in reality in real life. do you have a big softie that way yes.
you can't be harsh just like hold. everybody to excel no I can push but I. do it more of motivation I can't be. strict and uh do you do that for. yourself are you harsh on yourself I'm. very harsh on myself but I think. everybody is. uh with with our first and best judges. you'll be the first one to know whether. you've done a good job or not oh yes you.
might not say it right but you know and. you know that next time I can't do this. every human being is like that we just. we shy away from seeing it publicly do. you look your movies after they've been. released I watch my movies almost every. week try to and I see and I make notes. you can change this you can do this. better if you had this approach you. could have played the scene like this. I do that I review my work a lot. a lot I think it's important it's the.
best way to learn and to improve what's. your approach as it like do. quantity or quality let's say so what do. you believe in like come up with one. project but take a year to do that or. come with like no projects I don't set a. time frame. um I'll I'm enjoying doing I mean when I. first started acting uh we used to do. multiple films at the same time I enjoy. starting a film and finishing it because. it allows me to Deep dive into that. character and and really inhabit that. mind space and then once it's done. you're like okay push that aside snap.
out of it move on to the next one that. can take two months. um. I mean so far this year I've already. finished three films. um last year I just made one film. so each story each film has its own. lifespan. I finished films in 35 days. I finished filmed in in 200 days. so I I don't like to put a time frame. whatever it requires you should give so.
it's quality like until you're satisfied. you were not gonna move to them I'd love. to be able to be that indulgent but. being. a commercial medium and being somebody. else's money I mean you can't just say. shooting I mean there has to be a budget. you have to have those kind of things. within that framework can you do your. best that's also the challenge yeah.
so there are a lot of permutations and. combinations and you hold yourself. accountable for that like forever you. have to you have to if I'm the face of a. product. I have to be accountable for it I have. to have that responsibility on my. shoulders I have to be conscious of that. do you see your art as business it is a. commercial art. because the minute. somebody purchases that ticket I have to.
give them the value of that ticket in. entertainment. so although I'd love to be artistic and. talk about oh my art no no no somebody's. bought my ticket I've asked them to buy. a ticket then I owe them value for that. and you think about it every time you. sign a project you have to but not form. the business there's been so many. stories I hear them and I'm like this is. a beautiful story this is a wonderful. message I love the vision of the. directory pictures so you can't do it um. you can't waste other people's money. like that so Roi is going on in your. head I guess so on a certain level yes.
on a certain level you have to find that. fine balance between art and commerce. but that balance is achievable somewhere. we'll we'll have to do another. conversation on this because I want to. pick on you pick your brains on this. specific thing so I'll Make A Deal you. watch my film yeah. and if you like it then we'll sit down. and perfect if you don't like it then no. okay oh my God there's a lot of pressure. now I don't know but I'm hope I'm very. very sure that'll turn out to be thank. you really good thank you and we'll sit.
down again for sure I'm enjoying. optimism picking your brain thank you so. much thank you for having me no I I. really enjoyed talking to you thank you. I wish that we would have gotten more. time to get deeper in the business. inside because that's what our next one. once you see my film yeah then but. there's always an interaction and. there's a transaction in Everything 100. but for now I wish you all the best at. the movie I look forward to it thank you. so much and thank you for doing this. thank you perfect thanks a lot thank you.
thank you so much for watching this. episode till the end please let us know. in the comments if you like this guest. and you want us to do more of these kind. of guests or no so that we can serve you. better and come up with better content. which helps you achieve your your Indian. dream before you leave the episode like. subscribe comment and share it at least. with one person just because. conversations. one idea is enough to turn around your.
life. your people's life your family's life. and your countries. progression as well. until the next episode keep hearing. [Music]. [Music].
