Joe Rogan Experience #2459 - Jim Breuer

Joe Rogan podcast. Check it out. >> The Joe Rogan Experience. >> TRAIN BY DAY. JOE ROGAN PODCAST BY. NIGHT. All day. [groaning]. >> Good to see you, my friend. >> Yeah, you too. >> Young Jamie. >> So, I stopped you. We were getting. coffee. I said, "Stop. Hold this." So, what were you saying? Um, which one. first?

>> The prostate one. >> Okay. So, the prostate one. >> Let's go [snorts] straight to the dick. >> All right. Uh, >> that is not really the dick. It's like. it's behind the dick. >> So, this [snorts]. would be. >> I'm an anatomist. >> It is behind the dick. >> Is that a word? >> Anatomist. >> Uh, autopsy. >> So, bladder contains approximately five. milliliters of cloudy yellow urine. The. prostate is slightly and diffusely. enlarged with marked enlargement of the. vermontum. That's how I would have said it.

>> Uh, the testes are unremarkable. That's. the last thing I want anybody to say. about my nuts. [laughter]. I want them to say, "Wow, what a great. pair. >> Great body, but the nuts are. >> unremarkable.". >> Unremarkable. >> Unremarkable. So here is [snorts] a. some sort of discussion between him and. someone. >> Okay. Uh the guy says exactly not clear. what effects hormones might have on that. aren't replaced by testosterone. The. advantage of taking testosterone there. are two different things. You can have.

high testosterone and still have a need. for Viagra because you don't have a. prostate. Right. And then Epstein says. correct. >> And then at the bottom they show another. document. >> Hold on. Let me keep going there. So, that's an extreme example. >> Uh, I was actually going to try and move. up one level sort of drug enhancing life. if you don't mind it. He doesn't mind. it. I'm sort of outer space thinking. Oh, so he's trying to juice up. So, he's. saying I'm moving up one level of sort.

of drug enhancing life. I don't know. what I think he means. He's going to. start juicing. That's what it sounds. like. >> So, he doesn't have a prostate. It says. >> there's another document that says. something about it after a radical. prostatctomy. >> Prostatectomy. >> So when they take out your prostate, >> but that doesn't necessarily say he had. his. I think it's a document, >> but he said he doesn't have a prostate. And it says patient Jeffrey Epstein. And.

it says according to the American. Urological Association, serum PSA should. decrease and remain at undetectable. levels after radical prostctomy. >> And there's other documents wherectomy. >> contacting doctors that specialize in. that uh very. uh thing. >> Okay. So the doctor saying he had a. radical prostctomy. He's saying he does not have a prostate. But yet the body from the autopsy. >> and so. >> talks about the prostate is slightly and.

diffusedly enlarged. >> So that's not his body. That's what it. seems like. >> I don't buy I don't. >> you don't buy that. >> I don't buy his dead. Why would you? >> Right. Right. I don't buy his dead. either. >> Here's the other. >> But however, hold on. >> This is from a uh attorney. So this is. like assistant United States attorney or. something. [snorts]. >> So the OCM told me it signed a.

confidentiality agreement in connection. with the investigation into the murder. of Jeffrey Epstein. [snorts]. >> So almost six months after he died, >> they're asking for a document about the. investigation of the murder of Jeffrey. Epstein. >> Was that because there was accusations. that it was a murder? >> Don't you know? So, we talked about this. before that 18 days before he allegedly. committed suicide, um his uh he. complained that his cellmate tried to. kill him. And you know who his cellmate. is? >> Who?

>> Oh, you don't know? >> No. >> His cell I'm Kurt Madskar. You don't. know? [laughter] Oh, you don't know. Uh. his his cellmate was this gigantic cop. who was a murderer. He had killed four. different drug dealers. Yeah. He was a. contract killer. This is the the guy. That's his [ __ ] cellmate. Look at that gorilla. >> That's That's a silverback. >> Yeah. Dirty cop, murderer. And then they. said, "hm, most high-profile witness of. all time, defendant.

of all time. Let's put him in jail with. a murderer, a guy who contract kills, dirty cop.". And then he says they well, the report. was they found him unresponsive with a. noose around his neck or an orange. jumpsuit turned into a rope around his. neck. And then he said that his cell. tried to kill him. >> My question and in in does anyone really. believe he was in a jail cell? Because I. know if I had the guy that can unravel.

entire. government dynasties and take down an. entire system. The last thing, dude, he's he's somewhere about three miles. underground with maybe a ball in his. mouth with electric rods, you know, >> or he's in Israel sipping my ties. >> Correct. Either place, it's like that. video. You said it, you sent this on a. runaround. We're going to ask you one.

more time or then we're going to laser. off your nipples. I'm telling you right. now, we need. >> Yeah, I doubt they're doing that to him. So, it's Yeah, he's he's either in. Israel like you said. >> If they had that, they would just get. rid of his body. They just. >> You saw the You saw the picture of the. so-called That was him in Israel. >> I think that's AI. >> I think it's AI, too. That's a scary. thing with AI. >> I think it even had a little AI. watermark on it. >> The one I saw at least. But who knows? It could be a real picture that someone. put through AI to put a watermark on it. so that people could go, "Oh, it's AI.".

>> Right? You don't know. Did you see the. lady that they say looks exactly like. Gain Maxwell? I don't think she looks. exactly like Maxwell. I think she looks. exactly like Golain Maxwell 20 years. ago. >> It's a deep fake. >> It's a deep fake. >> Yeah. Oh, okay. >> Sam TripleA reposted the guy that made. it he made another video too that was. not as good where he's like looking at. Benjamin Netanyahu on the street. It's. not It's not nearly as good. >> The problem is the aging. She doesn't. look aged. She looks younger. >> But I guess that's what happens when you. get out of jail [laughter]. >> and you get more attractive. Yeah. He.

get food, he get sunlight, [snorts]. makeup, a little a little uh exercise, >> taking some yoga. >> Um, yeah. Is there any video of him in. jail? Is there are there any photos of. him in jail? I've never thought about. that before, but what you're saying is a. good point. If you Joe, if you held if I. let's say you were the person that had. all this incredible information around. the world, bribery, do you really think. you take drug lords, you're not killing. them? You need the information. So,

you're going to bring him somewhere. You're going to milk him to it. However. that is, whether he's tied up, whether. he's you're going to torment him, be. like, "Listen, I'm telling you right. now, we're going to take care of you. However, I need to know." You say. there's tapes, right? Yeah. Where are. the tapes? Write them down. And you're. going to stay. Don't feed him. Don't. feed him until we get that one tape. And. we have these names in our hands. And. that's probably been been going on even. for for months, for years. You're not. you're not taking someone like that and.

going, "Oh, we're just going to put this. very valuable human being into a jail. cell where. >> with a multiple murderer. >> with two guys making $18 an hour are. going to watch it. >> We're sleeping. >> But come on, stop.". >> When the cameras are down, >> stop. They pre-production. All right. So, let's get the green screen and we. have him walking in here, sir. Is that. look somewhat? Then we can release it. down the road. It's uh it's it's it's. processed Hollywood nonsense. I don't. buy it. >> Okay. This is assuming though that he.

was working on his own, that he had all. this information. So if he's not working. on his own, he's working for. intelligence agency, then they have that. information as well. So along the way, so there are no secrets that he's. holding. They have all the secrets. >> This is much more likely. >> So in order for him to be in the. position that he was in allegedly. >> working for uh intelligence agencies, working for either the MSAD, the CIA, or. both, all the above. I would assume that along the way all of.

the information was shared. I do not. believe they would let one person have. access to all that information and store. it themselves. I think they would have. access to it at every step of the way. They would communicate with him at every. step of the way and they would probably. have like if I was running a government. agency like that, I would say tell me. what's going on. What do you have on. Bill Gates? What do you have on Les. Wexner? What do you have on these guys? What are they willing to do? What about. these scientists? Are they willing to. fill bogus science papers out? And what.

what what can we do? Jeffrey Epstein. stashed secret files in storage unit. across US that may include. never-before-seen evidence. Oh, >> so this came out yesterday that when he. got arrested, he supposedly paid for. investigators to go round up all of his. stuff and put it in various storage. units across the country. Like it's a. wild goose chase now. [laughter]. And like that it's stuff apparently. maybe no one's ever seen. They don't. know if they're still being paid for.

They don't know if. >> Imagine if they found I mean know those. storage unit shows where they break into. those storage unit shows. >> I don't understand. >> And it happened on the real the real. time one. >> like they think they're just getting. like old baseball cards. >> I heard those shows are [ __ ] My a. friend of mine told me that what they do. is they'll stock those shows. They'll. stock those storage units and then they. pretend that they're buying the storage. unit that's been abandoned and then they. get in there and then they find things. But those things were. >> Yeah. >> [ __ ] you. >> I don't buy any. >> reality TV. >> I know. But that's awful. >> Well, it's entertainment.

>> I feel duped. >> Do you really? >> I do, >> Joe. You really thought one time you. thought it was real, not the government. corruption, not all the Medicaid fraud, not all the immigration [laughter]. fraud, not all the ICE stuff. No. What. really bugs me is lying on a storage. unit show. I just can't. Or like like a. cash cap show. like are they really. contestants? >> These are our great distractions. These. are a great distractions to keep us from. paying attention. Yes. >> To what's really going on in the world. >> The reality TV. There's no there's no.

reality. >> It's all well produced. Wow. How much is. it well produced? Here's the question. Is it really well produced? Cuz it seems. like this one was a really shitty. production job. >> That was production. That was a bad That. was like low low. The only guy making it. is the guy that's selling the ads. Well, not just the guy who's in charge of it. [ __ ] kids, >> right? So, yeah. So, if this one, why. would you let that guy who's going to. eventually get caught? I would assume if. you're you have a thing for kids, you.

have a thing for if you're a pedophile, >> if you're into like 14-year-old girls, >> I would assume you're going to get. caught. And if I had a guy like that or. was this at a time where you couldn't. get caught because there was no internet. and then it got to a point where he had. so much power and control cuz he'd been. there for so long they couldn't they. were like oh Jesus Christ we got a. problem. Well he's he's thinking that. criminals they never think they're.

getting caught period. Especially like. think organized crime. If you're it's. it's no different like the scenes from. Good Fellas, right? You come here, it's. like what what's the matter with you? I. thought what you show up with a pink. Cadillac. What's the matter with you? >> Right. >> What's the matter with you? They can't. help it. He told everyone don't spend. the money. >> Don't look flashy. He there. This guy. without a doubt. >> His wife had a main coat on. Remember. that? >> What? Right. Take it off. Take it off. He gave it to me for my birthday. like,

"Get up. WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU?". AND NOW THAT GUY, there's no This guy, he's just the You remember when the. steroids came out in baseball? >> Uhhuh. >> And what' they do? They were like, "Listen, you got to take a hit. You got. to take a hit. Mark, Barry Bonds, you. guys, you're going to go out. We're. going to front you, but don't worry. You're going to stay in baseball. We'll. let it it'll go away in about 10 years.". But the owners are not going to get. popped. The people making this the. steroids injected. The people aren't.

going to get popped. >> They got popped. Balco got it. No, they. got the little guys. The little ones. >> No, no, no. The head of Balco went to. jail. I had him on the podcast after he. got out of jail. >> What about the owners that knew it was. going What about the agents and lawyers. that are supplying their stuff? >> No, no, no. Listen, you don't understand. about the baseball thing. The Balo had. developed a Victor Conte who had been on. the podcast before. Yeah. was a. scientist essentially and he had. developed a steroid that was. undetectable because steroids they. detect them based on certain molecules.

and if you adjust certain molecules it. doesn't show up in the test. So he. developed this thing called the clear. He called it the clear because it evaded. tests. Right? This is to evade the test. that. >> the Major League Baseball Association. was doing and any any drug tests cuz. this was a unknown steroid. So this was. not known by the organizations. It was. not known by the team. It was not known. by anybody. People suspected it cuz. Barry Bonds threw grew five hat sizes. >> and gained 50 [ __ ] pounds of solid.

muscle. People suspected it, right? >> But the bottom line is you don't know. what you don't know. And they didn't. know. There's no reason to tell them, "Hey guys, we're we're giving Barry some. secret steroids." He did this for his. own personal gain because he was brought. to the attention of this Victor Conte. guy who eventually became an anti-doping. guy, which is really weird. He ran. snack, which is this thing that like. helps people like uh detect testing and. and use it, you know, use supplements.

that are legal. >> Sure. >> But that I don't think that was known by. everybody. I think they kept it all on. the DL because there was such a blight. that was attached to steroid use. You. were a cheater, especially in baseball, which is like the American pastime, be a. cheater in baseball. >> Well, I'll tell you this. Um I remember. at that time uh because I was in the you. were in TV world TV world and you. attract all different. >> We did a show well you weren't on the. show back then on hard ball the base was.

on hard ball. >> Yeah. He was on one of the episodes. >> like third. Yes. I remember see I. remember seeing that cuz we'd sit and. watch my wife and I like Joan cuz we. tried out for the same thing and I. rooted. >> Well, you were in the pilot. Yes, I was. in a pub, but I rooted for everyone I. knew. Yeah. I was just like, "Oh my. god.". >> You always You've always been like that. >> I I loved that. But back then, like. couple years later, you become friends. with. certain type of people and lawyers,

agents, blah blah blah. And I remember. uh I remember one night hanging out, you. know, kind of like, "Wow, this is so and. so who I don't want to get into names. and all that, but they would go um you. want to hear some crazy phone calls.". Like, "What do you mean?" It's like, "Boom." And and they they told me 75%. And I'm like, "What? >> 75%. >> 75% of whats are on steroids." I'm like, >> "What? 75 80% baseball. Come on. There's.

no way. Come on. And then he'd play a. he'd play a phone message. And I didn't. want to say this for years because I. thought I'd get whacked. [laughter]. Hey, I love you. So, I remember them going, "Here, listen. to this." And you would hear like the. wives on my life going, "If he hits me. one more time, oh Jesus, I'm reporting. all you. I'm going to turn it." And then. and then he played the next one like,

"Hey man, we got a big series coming up. with the Dodgers. I need my [ __ ] like. now. I need it by blah blah blah." So. >> who is this person calling? >> These were ball players calling their. represent representation. >> So the representation mean their. >> agents. Okay. >> And lawyers. >> So maybe the agents are the people that. hooked them up with the people that had. the juice, which makes sense. >> And then they would talk. >> But the agents want money. >> They want money. And now. >> the best way to get money. Guy's got to. hit home runs. >> He's got to hit home runs. He's got to.

start belting the ball. He makes money. I make money. >> That makes sense. >> And we all make money. And then I start. telling if I if I'm not saying this. happened, but if you're an owner, I'm. like, "Hey Joe, I'm just telling you. right now, this guy, you want to keep an. eye on him? He's going to start jacking. 20 extra home runs." Really? How's he. going to do that? You'll find out. You'll You'll We don't need to talk. about that. But next year, if you got. XYZ budget, I think he'd like to play. So there's there's a lot there's a lot. at play, >> right? >> And now you're infiltrating children.

because now you're going into the farm. leagues and now you can't make it unless. you start doing that. But that's why I. say someone like this guy with a long. network. There's there's so many. tentacles, >> right, >> all over the place, but you always need. the fall guy, >> right? >> I mean, was he was he the demon? Yeah, but there's a lot of demons there. Did. you see that one the email that I sent. you Jamie where he's talking about. children for sex? Do you remember? You.

know the email I sent you Jamie? >> I sent it the other day. I like Well, that pretty much sums it up then because. he actually said it. >> Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Find that. I sent it to you in a text. message. This one's crazy. This one's. crazy. I've heard. >> So, he's having a conversation with a. woman. >> who says that she heard that there's a. place. Here it is. >> She's very emotional, kind, loving, sharp. Uh, I think you could become. friends, too. So, here it is. This a. friend, Alisa, told me about a project. she's doing, researching a really bad. guy that gets children for sex sent to.

his island. She almost fainted when I. told her that person is me. >> Wow. Like, yeah. >> What? Okay. So, that's just there. >> There's no way to interpret that any. other way. That person is me. >> That person is me. I. >> children for sex sent to his island. That person is me.

Holy [ __ ]. >> That That one is [ __ ] crazy. That's 2018. >> So yeah, this has been going on for So. this is like right before he got. arrested, right? >> Supposedly. >> Did But when did he get arrested? >> 2019. >> 2019. one month. >> Yeah. >> I don't know. The I feel like it was May. maybe. >> So, this was like But there was an. investigative reporter that was at the.

head of all this. this lady that was uh. really pushing because she had found out. about his sweetheart deal in 2008 and. she started gathering information and. pushing it and that's what led. ultimately I think to his being arrested. or. what I would say is the front of like. hey we're doing things well if there's a. different body that the autopsy had it. makes you question like was he ever in. that cell or was this person who's in.

That's how did they sell this person as. Jeffrey Epstein, >> right? >> Well, you imagine the guy in the cell. going, "I am not Jeffrey.". >> No, no, I'm not. I know. My name is. Harvey. I live on the upper east side. I. don't know what happened. I got a. speeding ticket and now next thing you. know, I can't go home. >> Yes. And this poor guy's just getting. railed hard before they're sitting there. and he's tying them up on the thing and. he's just Yeah. Are you going to spin. them around for a couple hours? This. episode is brought to you by Visible.

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>> In a jumpsuit like in court in jail. getting arrested is. >> No, there's I was trying I'm looking for. >> when you arrest big figures. He was a. big figure. It's a big to-do. YEAH. LIKE. JEFFREY, WHAT YOU DO? WHAT ABOUT THE. CHILDREN? >> CARE TO COMMENT ON THE CHILDREN? >> What are you doing with the children, Jeffrey? Why did you need 330 gallons of. sulfuric acid? They didn't know about. that back THEN. >> WHAT ARE CHICKENS? WHAT ARE CHICKENS? >> I don't know what's going on. >> What is jerky? What is jerky? >> Well, no one knew any of that stuff back.

then. If he was alive now, for sure. those questions would be shouted out. >> What is pizza and pasta? What happened. at Obama's White House? >> What is pizza? Pizza's mentioned like. 900 times. Clearly is a code. >> Clearly is a code. >> You know how crazy I felt for the. longest time? Like I'd just be in a. coffee shop and I'm like you guys don't. you guys you just don't know like. Jim's a little wacky but now it's it's. coming. >> Did you see that video we played the. other day of this guy at the airport.

just yelling out. >> yes you guys are going out about your. business the No guy he's like the files. have been released. >> Yeah I saw that and they were they were. going and you're all just going about. your business. The files are released. Kids are being tortured. >> which. >> but my question was like what do you. want me to do? What do you. >> I'm flying to Atlanta. What do you want. me to do? [laughter]. >> I got a gig. What do you want me to do? Scream and yell at everybody? Get. arrested? How is that going to fix. anything? This all happened 10 years. ago. What do you want me to do? >> And what do what do you do at this.

point? Because like it's uh. >> Well, you don't do anything at the. airport. You know, you get on your. [ __ ]. >> At the airport, right? Like I got to get. home. My wife's my my wife's mother. >> But that's like a lot of people online. They're very performative screaming and. yelling. We got to do this. We got to do. like what do you what do you what do you. want us to do? That's their. jurisdiction. >> It's outrage farming. >> Outrage farming. I like that. >> You're outrage farming. >> Imagine going to that length though. You're just like, you know what? I. really didn't like anything you said and.

uh you have no right being like who. who's taking the. >> Well, it's it's either people No, but. it's people that are trying to farm for. attention. They're trying to get extra. attention or it's people that just. aren't that good. They're not that. smart. Have you when's the last time you. engaged with anyone online that was. like, "Rogan, you're this or you're. that?". >> It's been a long time. >> Long time, right? Know. Yeah. >> Long time. But up until that up until.

that time, >> bro, I watch [ __ ] Louisis J. Gomez do. it every day. I'm like, Lewis, what are. you doing? What are you doing, you. psychoso? Stop [ __ ] arguing with. people online and calling them losers. [laughter]. >> Yeah. No. >> And comparing your life to theirs. Like, don't do it. because you don't know what. you're dealing with. You have no clue. what you're dealing with. >> Not only that, it's like it's a bad. frequency to get your brain caught up. in. There's so many other things to. think about. >> Correct. >> There's so much going on in the world. There's so many interesting things in. life. And the problem with social media.

algorithms and any kind of algorithm. that you get sucked into is it it. funnels you into this way. This is what. the information that you're getting. Most of the time you're getting a lot of. bad information, a lot of outrage. farming and your frequencies, like the. way your brain thinks funnels down that. pathway and you kind of lose control of. it instead of having access to all the. wonderful things in the world. There's a. lot of amazing, fascinating, curiositydriven people out there that.

are, you know, making videos about all. kinds of stuff and you could instead pay. attention to that stuff. >> Well, that's Yeah, you're trapped. I. used to say that even just about news. I. remember being a kid and if you look at. every newspaper and you just watch all. the headlines from the news, everything. is. I would sit there and go, "Okay, something bad happened down here in. Brooklyn. Something why why do you spend. every page or every headline of.

something negative? You had 8 to 10. million people living in this vicinity. Why do you harp on just propaganding and. looking?" And that I don't. >> it's really simple. It's really simple. that all these major newspapers are. struggling all of them badly and the. only way to get attention is clickbait. now because most of the stories that you. get are online. Very few people are. buying physical newspapers anymore. >> No more. They're dead. >> Yeah. Not only that, during COVID, I. think they kind of nuked their all of.

their credibility. There's a lot of. people that just feel like they're all. [ __ ] artists now. It was an. incredible exposing of of all. information during co. >> they say this video is him he sent this. to two women. >> from detention from detention. >> All right let's see. >> it's very it's weird the wall I had to. borrow the scotch tape to get the. pictures on the wall. >> Okay so Darren. >> why do I have why do you have to see.

that thing over his face. >> I'm pretending I'm talking to Darren. Hi, Darren. Are you guys having a good time? You can. see I have a little sore on my face that. I got from some black guy trying to kiss. me. It's really disgusting. >> Oh, it's really Oh. Anyway, I have pictures up on the wall. I had to borrow the scotch tape to get. the pictures on the wall. I'll talk to you guys later. Bye. >> What? >> Okay, so that's him in detention. He. said somebody tried to kiss him.

I seem pretty calm when you almost got. raped, >> dude. It's It's pre-production. All. right, so listen. [clears throat] Just. >> come in the room and say that somebody. tried to kiss you. You got to be into. it. Like that's take number 12. Like, god damn it, Jeffrey. God damn it. Do. you need a coke? You need a wine. I need. you most out. You don't seem like a guy. in jail. A guy who hasn't been sleeping. well. He seems pretty well rested. >> Yeah. So, you know, my whole uh life is. bad right now. I just you they're. bringing me in. Some guy tried to kiss. me. It's kind of a bummer. Cut. What?

That wasn't good. >> All right, I'm trying again. All right, doing it right now. All right, lighting. good. Here we go. The [ __ ] out of here. >> The best intelligence organizations that. can overthrow foreign governments would. probably have a plan if they wanted to. get the guy out and pretend that. somebody else died in his place. >> It's It's been from the beginning of. time. No. >> Yeah. >> From the beginning of time. >> From the beginning of time. Well, especially with like modern stuff. because you can with with modern masks.

Like remember the tall Biden? There's. not a chance in hell that was Biden. I I. feel so redeemed. My wife used to get so. mad at me. [laughter]. So mad at me. My kids would get so mad. at me. And I would I would say it. everywhere. I'd say it on stage. I say. on social media. I go, "I don't care. what you say. That is not Joe Biden.". You know, there was also that in the. files, too. They were talking. call me. crazy. And now all of a sudden they're. like, "Oh no, he was he was executed.".

Isn't that what they said? >> Executed. >> Uh, that seems sus. >> I went down there. >> There's a lot of those emails are just. emails, right? You First of all, Epstein. is dealing with prostitutes, people that. are willing to get prostitutes. He's. dealing with a lot of criminals and. weirdos, and a lot of those people are. probably full of [ __ ] right? So just. because somebody writes something in an. email doesn't mean it's a fact. However, >> when you see the video of Tall Biden, pull out pull out Tall Biden. >> Come on, man.

>> He grew. >> He grew and then he went back. Like they. might have put him on some [ __ ] and then. he shrunk back down again. >> and and his eye color would change. >> This one, right? Like a. >> Yes, that one. Like look at the. difference. >> What? He's like 69. Look at it. That's a. robot. Send out the robot. Do you got a. video of him walking out there? Because. when he walk, look how long his [ __ ]. legs are. Look how tall he is. This is. absolutely insane. Wait, who's watching. this going, "Yeah, no, that's the same. guy." Not only is he taller, but he.

moves better. He's more relaxed when he. moves. >> It was I Joe. >> It's like a guy doing an impression of. Joe Biden. >> Yes. Look at his But look how long this. guy's legs are. This is what's crazy. But rewind that as again, please. >> Here it is. It's good. It's starting. from the beginning, but it's good. It's. right there. It's good. Just play. Yeah, it's starting from the So, here's when. he walks out. Look at how long his leg. This guy's a basketball player. He can.

Look how tall he is. >> First president can dunk. >> I mean, just stop. Pause it right there, please. >> Right there. >> Pause it. Pause it. Just the physical. frame. When you look at the length of. his legs, that's extraordinary. That's. not like Jeffrey Epstein's prostate with. testicles. >> No, these whole different. >> That is a tall man. Like there's no way. that's a short man. There's no There's. no way that's a normal like what was how. tall was Joe Biden supposedly? 6 feet 61.

maybe. How tall was he supposed to be? >> The real Joe Biden. >> Tall the pre209. >> I said was like he's dead. >> I'm saying he's dead. I'm saying he's. long gone wherever he is. >> Six feet. Okay. Go back again. Six feet. tall. >> Okay. Six feet is like, you know, on the. tallish side. That guy's taller than 6. feet. That is a tall man. >> Look how look at the proportions from. his legs to the width of his shoulders,

the length of his legs. That's a very. tall man. >> Who's the casting director for this? I. mean, just being charitable, that's a 3. in taller man at least. Maybe the the. other Joe Biden, you know, got sick that. day or his wife died. That actor died. and they're like, "We need another Joe. Biden quick and then this one showed up. like, oh my god, just forget it. People. believe everything. Send him out.". >> If you have a guy who's the president. and it's he's known to be of poor. health, there's probably going to be. times where he's supposed to make a.

public appearance that's not that. important, but it's important to just. show his face. Well, you got to like. keep him in a hospital bed somewhere. So, you get a guy and you put the mask. on him. Did you ever see the walk? The. the the walk? >> Yeah, his shuffle. That guy doesn't walk. like that. >> That's a It's a robot. >> That guy walks like an athlete. >> It's a robot. >> Wait a minute. What? >> He look like a robot. >> No, he looks like a guy with bad knees. and a bad back. >> Bad back. I'm. >> You think it's a robot? >> I'm taking I don't know what it is. >> No, it's an old man who can't walk good.

>> I'm putting my chips in. >> Do you think you could program a robot. to walk like an old man? Have you? It. didn't look like the robots are not. good. Get the video, Jim. The robots are. not that good yet. They. >> trust me. I'm friends with Elon. The. robots, they're good, but they're not. that they look like robots. They don't. look like humans yet. >> You put You put a little suit and jacket. on them, put them up, and you just. videotape for 3 seconds. No. Why would. you do that? It's a guy. >> All right. No, I agree. This one's a. guy, but there's other ones from like.

>> What is this one, Jamie? Same one. >> That's the same better version of it. I. was just replaying it. >> Okay. No, that's not a robot. That's a. guy. >> There's ones where he's walking on the. lawn and his legs like what does he do. with his legs? It's crazy looking. >> Jim, like neurologists have looked at. this. He walks like a guy with dementia. That's how they walk. >> My dad had dementia. He didn't walk. anything like that. >> Not all people with dementia walk like. that, but it's typical of the way people. walk when they don't have control of. their body anymore. Like he fell down a.

lot. Like it's very like. >> bicycle went down. I got it. >> It's a lot of things. He fall down. walking upstairs. Remember? >> Yeah, I remember. >> Three times. >> I remember. I. >> You think it's a robot? >> I didn't say it's 100% robot. I'm saying. [laughter]. I will put my chips in. I'm I'm at the. poker table and like you're really going. in all in that that was not Joe Biden. I'm going all in. >> That's not Joe Biden. >> I'm show you. >> Never was. >> Okay. >> From 2020 on it never was. I think this.

is a productive line of conversation, [laughter] but um. >> that's just me. I get it. >> You're going to watch this joke. >> Yeah, watch this. What? >> What? >> But that's He's walking in sand and he's. old as [ __ ] dude. >> He's walking in sand. >> I get it. >> If I walk in sand and I'm drunk, I look. just like that. [laughter]. He's on a lot of blood thinners there. Maybe they got to his head. I don't. know. He's got a stent. I just Jamie, I'm going to send you something. This is. stateofthe-art right [clears throat] now. when it comes to uh robots and it's.

pretty [ __ ] good, man. Pretty [ __ ]. good. But it's not that um it's these. are robots that can actually do martial. arts. It's very impressive. >> I feel like I just saw something like. this. It was frightening to a degree. >> Yeah, it's from China. So, go full. screen on this. This is really. interesting. So, you got these kids. They get out there and um. these robots do martial arts with them. Like, look at this. It's really wild, man. I mean, it's pretty human movements.

>> Now, if they had suit and ties on, they. can pass for a president. >> Not yet. [laughter]. Not yet. But look at these things. They. can do back flips. Like, this is crazy. They do wheel kicks. >> It's really nuts, man. >> So, just imagine these things with. [ __ ] ARs just running into buildings, gunning people down, cuz that's what's. coming, >> bro. There's a place they're going to be. bulletproof. They're going to have night. vision, heat vision, insane hearing.

There's a place in Florida, bro, that. have the uh out in the Everglades. It's. like this this farmland. You never see. anyone there, but they have the the. mechanical robot dogs. >> Yeah. >> Patrolling everywhere and spraying the. fields. It's. >> the dogs spray the fields. There's like. all different types of machines that. come up that will like spread the field. and they have these the dogs that patrol. everywhere. It's wild. You can buy one. >> I never saw any of that. You can buy. them now. >> Yeah, you can buy those robots. >> Yeah, Les was telling me about it.

>> I think I want one. >> Lex Freriedman uh he actually works with. robotics. Like he was uh an artificial. intelligence uh engineer before he ever. started doing podcasts. You're like, you're like the movie The Fifth Element. when the chick when the chick came and. she got all the information like who's. I'm always fascinated. You have so much. information like brilliant insight. information.

Who's left on on your list where you're. like, I gota I want to look at I need to. speak with so and so. >> Oh, there's a ton of people. There's. always new uh you know like I get a list. of uh every week multiple days a week I. get a list of potential guests and so I. go over the list and uh a lot of it is. scientists a lot of it is like people. that are doing groundbreaking research. on like neurode development. genetics.

[sighs]. there's a lot of them that come up that. are cosmologists. uh that are working on you know just. bizarre car theories. It's it's a there's always someone. that's working on some, you know, like. very high level of some esoteric line. of, you know, some kind of discipline. that I've got very little information. about. There's always interesting. people. That blows my mind. >> Just blows my mind. I tried talking to.

anyone even some of the words I'm not. educated very well. I'm start saying. certain words and I'm just I'm already. >> I'm not formally educated very well. I. mean I only went to college for three. years and I was barely paying attention. >> I never paid attention. >> I was only going to college so that. people didn't think I was a loser. Was I. was doing Yeah. I was doing it while I. was fighting and then I was doing it for. a little bit while still doing standup. But I was only doing it so that no one. thought I was a loser. >> Really? >> Yeah. >> Is that more was that like a home thing. like. >> No, it was where I grew up, you know, lot everybody was going to college. I I.

went to school at a a really good high. school, Newton South in Massachusetts, and a lot of the kids were, you know, real ambitious and wanted to go to. college and get degrees. And I was I did. not want to have a job. I was like, what. am I doing? I I was like very feral. And. at the time, all I wanted to do was. compete. I was just doing martial arts. tournaments all the time. And there was. no money in that, you know? So, I was. like, what am I what's my career going. to be? Like, what am I doing? You this. weird period. So I said, "Let me just go.

to college so that no one thinks I'm a. loser." So I took a year off school. So. from uh graduated at 17. So for the next. year, I didn't I didn't go to school at. all. I just trained. >> I don't know the story. So when did you. when did you go I'm going to start doing. standup? >> When I was 21. >> Wow. And and you did you have that. desire before then? >> Not really. No. I was a fan of standup. I love standup. I was talked into doing. it by my friend Steve. He's a good buddy.

of mine. Steve Graham. >> because I would make people laugh in the. locker room. It was like he was a guy I. did taekwond do with. >> and he was like dude. >> and another good friend Ed Sher. Same. thing. Ed and Steve were two guys who I. was real tight with that you know I. would make fun of everybody and just we. were always just joking around. >> and I wanted a lot of attention. I was. young. [laughter]. >> They all did. Yeah. So that was uh. that's how and then I went to an open. mic night and I realized, oh these. people are all they suck. They're. beginners. >> Like oh, you could be a beginner. And.

then I thought about it just like. martial arts. If you just work at it, you can get better at it, you know? So. if you're just like a little bit funny, if you could just kind of figure out. what it is about you. I was like, this. is fascinating. It was like a whole new. puzzle. >> But I didn't know if I could ever do it. for a living. I was really so confused. when I was 21 because I had really kind. of decided to stop fighting and I was. still doing it a little bit but I had. like one foot in and one foot out which. is not good. And then uh I didn't have. any prospects like what am I going to. I'm already 21 like I should have.

already graduated from college by now or. be close or getting ready to work on a. mast's. I should be doing something like. a lot of the people that I went to high. school with or I should have a trade. like a lot of my buddies that went into. carpentry or electricity. You know, there's I didn't have a like career. other than teaching. So within a couple. years you start because you and I both. fairly quickly [snorts] started getting. in good positions in because if you were.

21 I'm going to say by 25 20 like 26. you're on uh hard ball. >> Yeah. >> Wow. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. We were really young. That's how. that's crazy lucky. >> Fast that happened. >> Yeah. It happened stupid fast. It. happened stupid fast and it was stupid. lucky because I didn't have any. aspirations to ever be on TV. There was. no part of me that wanted to be an actor. on TV. Zero. I was never an ambition at. all. Which probably helped me because.

when I went in and you know talked to. the people and did auditions and [ __ ]. it wasn't like oh my god this is my. dream. >> It was like so what do you guys want me. to do? Okay. Yeah, I could play a. baseball player. Okay. And they just. love the fact that I was, you know, I. had a background in athletics, so I I. knew a lot about You also would murder. [screaming]. like none other at the Laugh Factory. You would go up and I remember the. Disney executives.

because that's who did that. I remember. them sitting in the back watching you. you did the um. the lions or whatever the tigers mating. and it would just. >> the place would lose their [ __ ] like you. and it was captivating watch it was. howling funny and I'll never forget just. looking at the executives and I I don't. remember their name I just remember he. had a mustache he had a he had a dark. mustache dark hair he's from he's from.

Colorado he was like oh my god. Joe is just so god damn [ __ ] I can't I. can't can't take it. So you I mean wow. that's pretty awesome in that short. period of time. I wish I had no I won't. say I wish I had your mentality then I. have it now. Meaning back then I had the desire like. I want I want I'm going to start buying. satin clothes and I just [laughter] want.

to start getting nice clothes you know. I went sat the first time I went out. there I bought satin blue uh pants and. satin blue I was like I'm going to be in. Hollywood I was so [ __ ] so [ __ ]. Well, but you had this whole other I. remember seeing you and you were like we. we were at some hotel and you were just. so you like yeah I'm I'm going to go. play pool and work out. You wanted you. want like what? No, I'm looking for rock.

stars and actors on Melrose. And you're. like well I'm not doing that. I'm going. to the gym and I'm like you're going to. miss out. And [laughter]. but I really admired. I loved and I admired that about you so. much. How. >> But I was never interested in like. Hollywood stuff. It just was not that. interesting to me to to be around a. bunch of famous people and feel weird. I. was like I just rather be around normal.

people. I'd rather play pool. I'd rather. go to the gym. >> I was like that until I was around. famous people. And you're like, "Uh, [laughter]. >> uh, >> okay. >> This is uncomfortable. >> I want to go home. >> I want to go back home.". >> Oh, I tried to move back to New York. I. I would have moved back to New York. except I had a lease. I had a lease on. an apartment. When Hard Ball got. cancelled, I was ready to go back to New. York. I was like, "Fuck this place. This. is too uncomfortable for me." And again, I never had any aspirations to be. famous. And I definitely didn't have any. aspirations to act.

>> It was just money. They gave me a lot of. money to be on a sitcom. And I was like, "Okay." I I just couldn't believe how. much money you could get in a week. Like. this is crazy. >> It was crazy. >> Yeah. It was like more money than I made. in a year and I could make it in a week. I was like this is nuts. >> Especially cuz I went from broke Yeah. to being on a sitcom. >> Yeah. I I remember those same things. like you you're not making any money and. then all of a sudden like here you're. like $25 to $50,000 a week. >> Yeah. >> You just come and camera block here and. there and you don't even have to be the.

star. >> It was bananas. >> What? But then when I got on news radio, I was like, "Oh, this is a whole. different kind of a thing." Like, "This. is a really good show with really good. writing and really good actors." I was. like, "This is fun." Like that I enjoyed. a lot. >> But it's the world of uh acting is long. days. >> and it's not what I like to do the most. So, it was like, you know, it's it's. great, but you can get sucked into that. velvet prison and then, you know, you'd. be like I' I I'd be talking to my.

friends and be like, "Yeah, I just did a. week in Florida. It was [ __ ] awesome. Went in there on Wednesday and and I I. was realizing like these guys are. selling out on the road and they're. traveling all the time. They're having. all this fun.". >> I'm like, they're doing what I wanted to. do, which was like stand up like on the. road, but I was only doing like small. sets in town. I was only doing like 15. minutes at the laugh factory, 15 minutes. at the store, you know, it's like the. real comedy was like headlining, doing. an hour, really developing your act,

>> right? >> And it was like I enjoyed doing news. radio, but I didn't enjoy it as much as. I enjoyed being around comics, doing. sets, being at the clubs, laughing all. the time. It's like a different kind of. people. The actor people were all. worried about what the other actor. people were doing. They were all worried. about like like what rating we were what. number we were in the ratings. >> Correct. >> Yes. And that's all they would talk. about. >> Dude, we were at a table once and they. were all bitching about how, you know,

we were on, you know, whatever night we. were on. We moved like nine times over 5. years. And back then there was no. internet. So you couldn't tell people. that you're not on Monday night anymore. You're not on whatever it was. And so. they were all bitching and getting. pissed because Sex in the City was on. this time slot and the single guy was in. this time slot and if we were there we'd. be number two or whatever, right? >> And I was like, "Guys, last time I. checked, we're on TV." Yeah. >> Like this is a dream. Yeah. We're not.

number one, but we have a funny show and. we're on TV. Just [ __ ] enjoy the. ride. >> Yeah. And it was a great show. It was a. lot of fun. It was a great show. It did. well, but Yeah. there that world just. never it's. >> but it was just so lucky to get it so. quick you know I was on news radio 6. years into doing standup. >> and it didn't make any sense to me but. it's also why I wasn't nervous about it. was like it seemed so normal to me like. okay this is a job I'm doing but it was. because I didn't want to do it not not. that I didn't want to do it but because.

it wasn't wasn't like in my ultimate. dream. >> well that's that made me laugh I saw you. years later and I don't know if it was. uh if it was uh the fear factor or. whatever and someone snarkily like in in. a snarky way were like why would you why. would you take this and you're like cuz. they're paying me [ __ ] [ __ ]. money. They offered [ __ ] [ __ ]. money like you wouldn't do this for. whatever the episode and I just it made. me laugh. So, it's just you gave the.

real answer. If I offered you whatever. program I'm going to offer you, I don't. know, uh, 20 million for two years, you're going to go, I'm not doing that. That's ridiculous. Why would I use Why. would I leave my sanitation job to. >> Money equals freedom? That's what people. need to understand. Like, if you can. make a pile of money, you get [ __ ] you. money. And then the key is don't be. chasing [ __ ] your mother and [ __ ] your. family and [ __ ] the world money.

>> Correct. >> Stick with [ __ ] you money. >> But just make sure you say [ __ ] you. >> So make sure you don't do things you. don't want to do. And so when Fear. Factor came along, I initially took it. cuz I thought it was going to be. cancelceled immediately. >> I was like it was I was in a development. deal with NBC. >> and they they sent me this thing and I. was like, "What the [ __ ] is this? They're gonna stick dogs on people. Like. I was laughing. I'm pretty sure I was. stoned [laughter] when I first got the. pitch. >> Yeah. >> And I read I go, "This is hilarious.".

And I don't know if my manager even. wanted me to do it. I don't remember. I. think they probably wanted me to hold. out for a sitcom. And I was like, "Are. you [ __ ] kidding me? This is. hilarious. Let me meet with them." And. they didn't like me at first because I. came in and was making fun of it. And. they thought it should be scary because. this was fear factor, right? >> And I was just joking and like I came. into the the meeting. I was probably. stoned. I came into the meeting and I. was just cracking jokes about everything.

and laughing and they didn't. But then. David Herurwitz, who's a friend of mine, who was one of the producers on the. show, he's like, "No, no, no, no. Look, the whole world's going to be laughing. at us." Yes. >> It's way better if the host is laughing. >> Yes. >> It's way better. Yes. Like let's just. trust. >> like the lunacy of what these what. lengths these people would go to. >> They were going to go a little like a. sports cer or something. You know what I. mean? [laughter]. >> Here we are in fear factor. Fear is not. a factor for you. >> The ninth. >> Maggie from Wisconsin is going to get in.

the tank. >> Yeah. That's awesome. >> Yeah. So it's just luck. A lot of luck, man. A lot of weird luck. I've had a lot. of weird luck my whole life. Like even. even coming here is weird luck. even. opening up the club. Weird luck. >> Why you say that? >> Because a lot of things have to happen. in order for this club to to exist, right? The a lot of things have to. happen. First of all, the COVID thing. has to happen, right? So, and it has to. happen in California where they have. very restrictive laws and everything. gets locked down and we can't perform.

for like. >> I think the store was shut for a year. and a half, man. >> Are you serious? >> Yeah. California was nuts with co, but. over here like almost immediately you. could do shows, right? Like we were do. the the cap city was doing shows and. they had people separated before they. went under. >> They just had like the tables moved like. six feet apart which was [ __ ]. Didn't mean anything. >> Yeah. >> And then um when we started doing shows. at the Vulcan, that was in like November. of 2020. So that was pretty soon after,

you know, the rest of the world was. still like completely like California. and New York were still completely. restrictive and Texas was pretty pretty. wide open. >> And so I I have to have the kind of. money that Spotify gave me. >> Yeah. >> And then I have to be so dumb that I'm. in the middle of this giant deal. I'm. like, I'm just going to move to Texas. Which they were like, what are you. doing? Like you need to be in LA. That's. where your studio is. That's where the. guests are. Right. >> And I was like, I'm flying like at least.

two or three people a week out to Los. Angeles. I bet I could get them to fly. to Texas. >> Yeah, >> but it was a it was a dumb gamble. It's. like it's not a smart move. So, but so. it has to be like the Spotify money. It. has to be everything closed down and. then it has to be the store closed down. because the store closed down allowed me. to get guys like Adam Eaggan and you. know and store. Yeah. All the people. that worked at the store came and work. [clears throat] for me. That's like one. of the big secrets. Jody, >> the managers, like a lot of the people.

that are at the mothership came from the. store and they were unemployed. >> Yeah. But I wouldn't take it I wouldn't. I I like your approach is it luck? >> No, but it has to it has to be some luck. otherwise it doesn't happen because if. there's no luck then if there's no COVID. lockdown then all these comics aren't. willing to move here. >> Correct. Tony Henchcliffe, Tom Seagura, Christina. Pazitski, Brian Simpson, everybody moved. here, >> right? >> So the only reason why anybody would.

move here is cuz California's locked. down. If the store was hopping and every. they would be like, "Why would I leave? Why the [ __ ] would I go here?" Yeah. So. it had to be like a place where you. could go and you know and then you have. to have the resources to do something. like that. So that has to be like the. Spotify thing. Like it's like so many. things have to fall into place where. it's that kind of a gamble makes sense. >> Yeah. >> It's a lot of luck, man. >> It's a lot of luck, but it's also a lot. of decision making and a lot of you you.

you're very thoughtful and and you're. the walk that you walk creates an energy. and it's an it's it's it's very. powerful. It's very inspiring. And I do. believe in that stuff. Like the way. you've walked most of the life that I've. known you has been you you're probably. you inspired me so much years ago. Years. and years ago. You came on my radio show. and and you literally started talking.

and you called in and I remember I just. told everyone just be quiet. Just be. quiet and let him go. and just I knew at. that moment. >> you were going to be changing. like culture if that makes sense. You. you went into this you went into this. deep conversation about we are we are. shifting in humanity and basically you. you said we're either going to.

um live for truth. or you're going to be a liar like leech. type thing. It was very powerful and um. I think eventually I was like you know. put Pink Floyd behind and put that on. someone put on the internet. >> clip of it. It is one of the most. because I wanted the world to hear what. you said. It was such a like no other. pastor could say. No one could say it. the way you said it. So yes, it is all. luck. But I do believe.

that presence that you put out and that. energy, it's it's trusted and it's it's. a it's a force that opens doors without. even you knowing it because it is all. for uh the good in my belief. Um but. anyway, that's my little. >> Well, thank you. That's very kind of. you. That's very kind of you. Well, you. you inspired me too, dude. Cuz when we. first started working together, the one. of the worst times I ever bombed ever. was uh I was headlining when I really. shouldn't have been headlining. I really.

didn't have an hour. And you and I did a. weekend together somewhere like West. Nyak, New York or something like that. >> Somewhere yucky like a holiday thing. >> But uh I did okay every show except the. late show Saturday night. You [ __ ]. murdered. >> I do. >> You murdered. And I remember being so. nervous. I was so nervous and I went on. stage nervous and I just ate a dick. And. I remember it was like one of the worst. bombings I've ever had in my life. And I. remember thinking at the time, boy, I.

got to correct something. I first of. all, I can never go on stage that. nervous again. I was like, what was. wrong? What was wrong was instead of. laughing at you and going on stage. having a good time, I was nervous about. my own performance, which is like a. self-defeating mentality. >> Yeah. And I had to realize that, >> which is also one of the reasons like it. really my my stand up bumped up a lot. after that weekend. It really did cuz I. really worked on it hard cuz the bombing. was bad. >> Bombing is bad. It was a But this was a.

bad one. I was supposed to do 45. I. bailed at 35. I got in trouble. [laughter] I was eating dick, dude. I. was eating dick. It was horrible. But um. the same thing happened when I would. take Joey on the road with me. And the. reason why I would take Joey on the road. with me is because he was so hard to. follow. So I said, "Okay, I thought of. it just like training partners.". >> Yes. >> Like you don't want to spar with a guy. who sucks. You want to spar with a guy. who's better than you, right? So that. you can you could get to his level. Yes. And so with Joey, Joey was so loose and.

so free and he was so silly. And I was. more rigid and I tried to do more setup. punchline stuff, but I was, you know, I. was only whatever, eight, nine years in, whatever it was. I was still trying to. like figure it out. And Joey had a. rhythm to him. He's just so loose. And. I'm like, >> "This is gonna help me. Let me just take. this guy on the road with me." First of. all, he's the best guy to hang out with. He's so much fun. >> He seems like I love him to death. >> I never got to hang out with him. I only.

I've only got to see him on some other. places. I know. >> He's the best. He's so Everybody. Everybody's like He's so fun. >> Like when you're around him, it's all. hugs and laughs and he's the party. You. bring Joey anywhere, the party's with. Joey. When we would go to dinner, we'd. have as much fun at dinner as we would. at the show, >> right? He's the entertainment. >> Well, he's just a great social engineer. Like, he would like the he would like. [ __ ] be the the maestro that would.

get everybody going. We would be. laughing. >> and then we'd go to the show and be have. a good time. And I learned to laugh at. him cuz he'd be murdering. And I'd. learned to take that momentum of. laughing at him and carry it into the. energy in my performance. >> Yes. >> So it was like it was a good thing cuz a. lot of people want the opposite. They. want the guy going on before them to. suck so that they look like a hero. >> No, I don't want that. >> There's a lot of people out there. rocking that [ __ ] ski. >> I like I like what you said. I like a. guy hitting hard.

>> Yeah. >> And then the nights like even I have I. have uh Brian McKenna opening for me. right now. There's nights like I think. we're in Louisiana and I was like, "Oh, shoot. I got to get up." Like, "What is. he doing there?" Like, and that makes me. go, "Oh, all right. I got to stay. crystal clear." Like, I've got to bring. it to this whole level. He's making me I. love if someone makes me work loves. >> Well, it's not just that. It's also that. the crowd gets their money's worth. >> Yes. >> Bunch of people came out to see you. Like I've gone to see friends that are.

really good comics that I really love. and then I go to see them and they have. an opening act. I'm like Jesus Christ, I. got to go to the bathroom. I got to go. sit outside for 20 minutes and wait for. this to. >> to end. That's a bad place to be whether. it's your buddy or not. >> They do it because they want a light. opener. >> Like Ron White's open about it. Like he. he talks about you do you do better than. me, YOU'RE GETTING FIRED. [laughter]. HE DOESN'T give a [ __ ] But this, you.

know, I love Ron the best. [laughter]. But. >> how [snorts] he's still out here? No, >> but yeah, he's out here. Yeah, he's at. the club all the time. He's there. tonight. Okay. >> Yeah, Ron or tomorrow night, rather. Ron's the best. He's the best. >> Okay. >> He's the He's another reason why I came. here because he was already here. Ron. moved here before the pandemic. >> Oh, wow. >> Yeah. He moved here in I think 201. 18 or 19, somewhere around then. And I. was like, why why' you He would He had a. place in Beverly Hills that he kept. still. So he'd come back and forth, but. he was like, I love Austin. You never.

have to leave. If I'm want to fly. anywhere, it's the middle of the. country. The people are nice. The food's. great. I was like, can I live there? No. That's what my thought was like, I can't. live there. >> Ron is the type of guy, too, that he. doesn't realize. how good he is and how popular he is. sometimes. He literally, don't ask me. why he called me. I have no Oh, I I. remember it was some bizarre connection. He's like, "Hey, Jim, I.

I keep getting asked in the play in. London." And I went, "Oh, you will. murder murder in London." He's like, "I. don't know. I mean, I don't know. And. I'm like, "Ron, if you were to play. Scotland, England, Ireland, like you. you're going to have a whole new you're. going to murder." He's like, "I don't. know if they were. Please, I'm begging. you. At least just take the gig. Please. just take the gig." And this is this was.

a couple of years ago. And apparently he. did do it. I was like, "Jesus like I. heard it." Of course you did. >> Especially style. He's funny. He's very. humbled though. Ron is very humble guy. >> Yeah. >> He's a You know, he's a great guy. He's. the best. >> Well, that's why I like I like to come. here the first time because. what I like about here's I reached a. point where I have my following. I have. my crowd. And if I'm working out stuff,

even if it's in an hour, they're going. to be patient with me because they like. me and they've been on my journey, right? But if I were to go into a club. and do 15 minutes, I better I better. they're not my a lot of them don't know. me and I have to and I remember the. first time I came here I didn't want to. go on stage. So I just go on stage like. I don't know like go on stage. Wow. It. was like okay uh yeah I'm not Wow. Seven. more. Okay. I I didn't even finish my.

setup yet. This is This made me This. place made me want to start working. harder again and go, "Hey man, you got. to you got to put the gloves on." Not. that I had any lack of confidence of. what I put out there for an hour, but. those short little 15minute when they. see everybody. It doesn't matter. It's. an even playing field. It's pretty. awesome. >> Well, you mean that was great about the. store, too. Like you'd get a night where. you had like seven, eight national. headliners in a row, >> you know? I I saw that one and they.

don't care after a while. Just bring the. funny. I saw. someone from a huge sitcom go on stage. place. loses their mind. Even I was a little. like, "Oh, wow. Oh, wow." And about they. did the shtick of their character. And about five minutes in, they were. like, "Okay, we're done. You going to. you tell jokes or you're just going to. be the TV guy?" And it's like they don't.

they've seen everything. You got to come. with the goods. You got to work it. >> TV guy thing. We used to see that all. the time in LA, too. Well, that's what. led to Kramer, >> that meltdown. >> Well, that's who it was. >> Yeah, [laughter]. >> that's I didn't want to say I didn't. want to say, but he he first walked up. was like, "Oh, dude." And he cra. and then after about five, seven. minutes. >> Yeah. >> And this one was at the improv and I'm. watching I'm like, "Oh, wow. He Oh, wow. Oh, you don't have material. He's just.

wow. >> Which is crazy. >> They turned off quick. >> Imagine thinking that you could do 15. minutes with no material. I just don't. understand comics make it look easy. You. know how many you know how many people. go How many people have you met that go, you know what? You inspired. I'm going. to I'm going to start doing standup. >> Okay. >> Some of them you're like, please don't. >> Yeah. Like, okay, I still get I'm. starting next. Here's my fur. And. they'll send me a set of their first. set. like you we comedians make it look.

like we just walk up and just weigh it. >> Well, it's also a guy's used to. performing in front of a live audience. when he does a sitcom and everybody. loves him. And if he could make people. laugh for a minute, he thinks he could. probably make people laugh for multiple. minutes, >> right? >> Just keep it going. Just do the same. thing for 15 minutes. >> And the little side of us just back then. I root for everyone, but when those guys. walk off, we like go down. How does that feel? There's nothing. more. >> Well, we don't like anybody that's half. stepping, right? That's like half in,

not really doing it, >> right? >> Like you're just taking up 15 minutes. from someone that could be doing it. >> Correct. I used I used to uh. >> Do you know Neil Brent? Not Neil. Kevin. >> No, I don't know Kevin very well. Um. I've met him. I'm sure. I I remember him. doing sets in New York back in the day. >> Kevin would get so pissed because uh. what's the He's a famous guitar player. Oh my god. Yes. John. [laughter].

>> So Kevin would come in. He'd come in to. the radio and be like he's going up. He's doing [ __ ] 20 minutes AND HE. SUCKS. WHAT? I'M LIKE I I CAN'T GO TO. MADISON SQUARE GARDEN and go give me the. GUITAR FOR 20. IT'S MY [ __ ] TIME. SINCE COMICS would get really edgy. They. didn't care who you were. They go in. I'd love to listen. He would rant and I. would howl. >> listening to R. Of course I would prod. the tiger once in a while when he starts. going. [laughter] I'm like.

[screaming] [ __ ] crazy [laughter]. [ __ ] JOHN MAYER. ALL RIGHT, I GET IT. YOU PLAY [ __ ] GET OFF THE STAGE. >> OH MY GOD. >> YEAH, comics are very territorial about. the art form. You know, like when. someone tries to do it that's not a. comic, they they automatically kind of. reject them. I'm always like, "Give him. a chance." Never know. >> Never [ __ ] know. Never know. Never. know. A guy who's been acting but really. always wanted to do standup might have. some good ideas and might really throw.

themselves into it. It's possible. Why. would you assume it's impossible? It's. possible. >> It is possible. >> But the reality in LA is a lot of them. were doing it because the the whole. casting thing had dried up for them, right? So, they weren't getting brought. into shows anymore. So they decided to. do standup and they would just, you. know, put together an act like write an. act. >> there. Yeah. >> Yeah. But it wasn't what they really. loved. So it wasn't what they really. >> paycheck. >> Yeah. >> It's a little paycheck to get them by.

>> It was a career decision. It was like. pivoting, you know. >> Yeah. I know a couple guys like that. Sitcom or or or a sketch show or even. like an SNL character didn't do standup. and now they'll tour and try to do. whatever. So, here's an interesting. thing I should tell you because you'll. really you you know this person. Okay. Um. >> I actually uh made up with uh Mark. Merritt the other day. >> We actually had uh I had to help him. with something.

>> Um I had to inform him about something. >> and he sent me a very sincere message of. thank you and then I sent him a message. back that was sincere and I said, "Look, I'm not your enemy. I'm sure if we saw. despite our differences, I'm sure if we. saw each other. >> within a few minutes, we'd be laughing. and smiling, which is generally how I. interacted with him for the most part. I. had only a few bad interactions with him. >> and he was pretty honest about how, you. know, maybe it's his own mind and, you.

know, it was [clears throat] but it was. a it was a very sincere interaction. which made me happy. It's not good to. have enemies, man. >> No, it's really not. It's not good. I. I've had. maybe two or three um that have vocally. put out on because I I'm not into the. Twitter. insulting or going on other programs. insulting. If you have an issue, tell. me, >> right? >> And then we'll we'll deal with it the.

way the real humans do it. >> Yeah. And um [clears throat]. when when. that that whole thing I I have a funny. feeling. I know it some of his issues. were but I felt and I put it out there. I felt I felt bad because for years I. didn't have great intera when I started. listen I'm not poo pooing or whatever. but yeah a lot of guys didn't like me. They were like who's this animated. loudmouth kid coming in here confident. blah blah blah. And he he would always.

kind of like I'll never forget he'd be. like you going to woo him you going to. woo him tonight with your. >> he was trying to sabotage you would. >> it was a competition thing and and I. understood that because I'm still back. then. >> you made a whole video video about it. >> Correct. Yeah, I saw that video. >> And so as we as we went on, I actually. was so happy for him. >> once he got WTF because you saw like, wow, he he's. >> he became a different person. >> and he found his niche. >> and he became friendly. Correct. He's.

easy to be around. He was all he was so. his podcast was killing it and then he. had his show on the IFC Marin. He was. doing great. He was way easier to hang. around with. He was incredible. >> because all the angsts had been removed. and he'd been he'd become a made man, >> right? >> Made man. Yeah. [clears throat] Become. legit. >> Who cares who else is becoming. Exactly. Um but then when things go. south, then it's hard to maintain that. same mindset. >> It's very easy for me to say, "Oh, just.

relax and who cares? Everybody should be. happy that all these people are doing. well." But if you're not doing well, that jealousy is a natural thing. I've. experienced it before. I've experienced. it. I know the feeling. I've I've. experienced it for brief moments before, you know, even like, you know, eight, nine years ago, maybe even. It's like. there's moments where someone's really. killing it. You're like, oh, what the. [ __ ] [laughter]. >> But then I I realized in my head like, god, that's a [ __ ] ass way of thinking.

Don't hold on to that. This is. >> we're on our own journey. This is this. is our world. Al, but also that same. feeling can instead be inspiration. Like. when you and I worked together and I. bombed, one of the things that inspired. me was not just I got to get better. because I bombed, but you murdered. You. had that bit about coming home drunk. >> Coming home wasted and your mother was. >> turned into a demon. Yeah, it was a. great demon. But it was it was so like. animated and big and I. >> it didn't make me hate you. I loved you.

We were great friends. I was like that. is so good. It it just made me want to. get better. So that same feeling that. can turn you, oh, you going to do woo. them, you do your [ __ ] Instead, I. was like, "Fuck, Jim. You're killing it, man. That's awesome.". >> Yes. >> I just I I come from a different world. and my world requires other people. around you to be as good or better than. you. The martial arts world, like when I. was a fourtime state champion and and I. was doing, I wasn't necessarily the best.

guy in the gym. There was guys in the. gym that were better than me. Yeah. >> Always. There was other guys that were. also state champions. Some of them were. national champions. They were better. than me. >> But because I was around those people. training hard all the time, that's why I. got so good. It was because I was around. people as good if not better than me all. the time that it it elevated my level. So I felt the same way about standup. I'm like, >> you need those people that make you feel. uncomfortable. They make you feel like,

[ __ ] I got to go to work. Yes. and and. and. whether it's him or whoever, it just it. doesn't even have to be the comedy. world, just the world in general, it it. always it's it's not that sad. I wish. sometimes people in those positions, no. matter how successful you are and. whatever you define success, if someone. else is starting to kill it somewhere, let them what is keep your eyes off. that. Just stay in your own your own. lane. I hate that term now. I've heard.

it. It's not stay in your lane. It's. stay in your world of confidence. And I. saw a couple people try to take a swat. And I I think it was deeper than that. I. think it was a they were envious and b. because you had certain certain people. on and perhaps they're they were angry. cuz they're still lumped into how they. define themselves to certain gangs that. their allegiance goes to. >> Yeah. Ideological. 100%. How dare he.

have. >> don't platform that person. >> Don't platform this one and don't. platform that one and don't platform. And a matter of fact, I would even hear. chatter like this. I would I would. never. >> And I go, yes, you would because well, if you wouldn't, then you would never be. me in the first place. So, what are you. worried about? We're we're different. human beings. Correct. The point is. >> I understand those feelings. I do. I. understand those feelings of anger and. those feeling of jealousy, of.

resentment. It is absolutely normal. But. it is a [ __ ] ass way to think and I've. thought those ways. I've I've had [ __ ]. ass thinking in my life. I 100%. So I. get it. I understand it. It's normal. But what these people need to hear that. I needed to learn myself is that that. not only does not help you, it hurts. you. But the same exact experience can. instead be inspiring to you and that. will help you and you're going to be.

uncomfortable with comparing yourself to. someone who's better than you. But that. uncomfortable feeling is what leads to. growth. It's really important. It's. good. It's good for you. But what's not. good for you is to try to dismiss that. person and [ __ ] on that person. Like. even if someone's doing something that I. don't like, I don't like their style. So. what? I don't care. There's a lot of. music. Look, I have teenage girls. >> When they listen to music, they love it. I don't like it.

>> But it doesn't mean it's not good. They. [ __ ] love it. >> They love it. >> There's a lot of guys that are into. jazz. I don't like it. [laughter]. >> But it does it doesn't mean it's bad. No, >> it's great for some people. >> It's their art. >> It's like everybody has a thing that. you're into and everybody has a. different style. So if someone's doing. something that you don't enjoy, you. don't have to hate them. It doesn't mean. that's not beneficial to you. It doesn't. help you at all. [snorts]. Could. >> sum what up what you said by you can. have your [ __ ] ass feelings.

>> Yeah. >> Just don't have your [ __ ] ass emotions. and act on don't act [ __ ] ass. Just. don't act [ __ ] ass. That's when you. start having issues. When you put it out. in the universe because it's still. inside you, which we all have it. Yes. >> It's when you put it out there. Now it's. out there. Now everyone looks at you a. whole different I've I've done that. >> multiple times. I'm never proud of it. Always feel horrible. Never to always. within family or friends or so. Never.

>> uh I try not to put it out in the world. in the world with uh names of people cuz. I don't I don't have any qualities. It. feels proud of yourself. >> No, I feel like a little punk [ __ ]. Like I can't believe I just did that. Oh. my god. I thought I was mature. >> You gave into those [ __ ] ass feelings. It's normal. >> It's normal. >> Like I I remember um uh someone was. telling me that Chris Rock was selling. out everywhere after the Will Smith.

thing. And I swear to God for like a. couple of seconds I was like a what the. he's usually he's selling out and. instantly all these arenas. It takes me. a couple of days like it's so stupid, so. dumb. like he was the hot ticket because. everybody wanted to see him, but it was. only for a few seconds and then I was. like, "What the [ __ ] is wrong with you?". Like you. >> you [ __ ] silly [ __ ] Such a dumb way. to think. >> But the problem is. >> you don't in the time. And then the.

other thing is they think that they're. going to diminish that by attacking you. But what they don't understand is when. you do that publicly, >> the heat comes for you. >> because now you've you've set the game. in motion. Now you started moving pieces. around the board and then people are. starting to move pieces against you. >> and that's the I I felt that even at a. time where I felt it was necessary like. the whole Carlosmania thing. I said that. to my friends afterwards. I said, "I.

don't think I'll ever do anything like. that again." Because just the negative, even if it was only 10% of the people. that were negative, 90% were positive, that 10% is just not a good feeling. It's a terrible feeling. It's not good. Even though I thought that was a. necessary thing to do because I not just. him, but I wanted to expose the way the. business was treating that where they. were profiting off of it and openly. covering it and they knew about it and. they thought it was just business. M.

>> that was what my agent said to me. It's. just business. >> I remember a phone call we had uh. somewhat after that and I remember you. telling me your agency dropped to you. They dropped to you. That's that's I'm. >> I'm not crazy for thinking that. Right. >> No, they dropped me. But what they said. was that I had to apologize to him or. they couldn't work with me anymore. Correct. And I said, "Listen, then if. just you bringing that up, our.

relationship is over.". >> Done. >> I said, "Just because you wanted to do,". and they like said, "It's just. business." I go, "You're making a. decision that will affect you for the. rest of your life." I go, "Because. you're siding with a vampire. You sell. art. That's all you sell. >> The all you guys are is a comedy agency, right? You sell art. You've got a guy. who's stealing art from other artists. Like, this is bad for you. Everyone's. going to know." So, Louie left them. after that. Louis came up to meet the. improv, asked me if that was true. I. said yes. He goes, "Okay, I'm leaving. them.". >> Atel, uh, Nick Schwartzson, a bunch of.

people did. So, it was it wasn't like I. was right, >> but it was also, but the negative. feeling of the the people angry at me. for it was like so gross. It was like. you you put that out there in the world. is a giant distraction. It takes away. from most of your life. You think about. it all the time. Just not good. at that. time. I I I understand that, but also. like for instance, I that was already. out there.

>> with him. >> Yeah. And I person. >> with comics it was. >> it was out there with comics and it was. out there with him. I personally. didn't see particular but like I want. once or twice and I'm not a LA guy. So. [clears throat]. everyone in their mother I mean it was a. lot of people that would say that. So. when. the po the point of that happening, it was such.

justice in the community and the beyond. that in the world like can we stop can. we stop if if you're taking from others. if you're taking from which I've already. dealt with at that point on some other. levels. It happened multiple times when. people would take and then they. >> Well, you dealt with it on SNL. Yeah. Yes. SNL and and other areas and and and. which whatever. It's all in the past and. I'm all good now. So when you deal with.

that and you're very I just dealt with. it with buying tickets as another whole. deal. So with that said, it it's very. freeing when you finally put it out. there. And not that you want to see. someone's uh career plummet or take a. hit or whatever, but it was very. refreshing to see that people or fans. went, "Oh, we didn't know this." Because. a lot of time fans don't care.

>> How could they know? >> They wouldn't know. But they but they. don't. And you go, "You're still going. to show up." You still And then all a. sudden it just it went to a whole. different direction. and you saw like. this person struggling here and then it. was uh it's that time we're living in. You set an example for if we're all. going to start moving forward, can we. just be blatantly honest? Whether it's. whether we're making art or or or food, whatever you're doing in your lifetime, stop stealing. And if you're going to.

take give the credit of where you're. getting it from. >> Well, but you can't do that in standup. >> No, you can't do it in stand. You have. to ask and you say, "Can I buy that. bit?" or something like that. But it's. just such a. >> Yeah, nobody wants to sell their bits. Like, you can't even do that. Well, you. could hire people to write for you, which is very respectable. I know like. highlevel comics who hire people to help. them punch up jokes. Nothing wrong with. that. >> No. And I never knew that either. I. never knew that until I I remember being. in New York and the guy's like, "Hey,

you know, I I I write with Chris like. Chris R." I'm like, "Oh, wow." Yeah. punch up and stuff like that. And then I. would see certain guys, which makes. sense because if you're going to hit a. certain level, >> I mean, you gota you got to stay well. and not saying they're not, but. >> people would always say that Chris like. had writers, but that's not totally. true. So, what Chris would do was he. would come up with all the material, would come up all the bits, and then he. would have guys watch his set, professional guys. And these. professional guys would watch his set,

and then they would talk about it. They. would have feedback on bits. Like he. really he really worked with Richard. Jenny a lot. >> He was crazy. >> Oh my god. Was he good? >> He taught me the most. I learned so much. from Jenny because he would just take a. premise. >> and he'd go and every time you thought. he was done milking this premise, he'd. show up again 15 minutes later like, "Oh. my god, WE'RE GOING ANOTHER DIRECTION. WITH THIS PREMISE. >> You got to be kidding me.". >> He was so thorough. >> Oh my god. >> He would take all I mean it was it was.

so impressive. >> Wow. So Jenny's helping. Yes. >> Jenny helped rock with Bigger and. Blacker. He helped him with uh what was. the other one that was really Bring the. Pain. >> Yes. The two big. >> two classic two of like if you have a. top 20 alltime comedy specials. They're. both in there. >> Monsters. >> Monster bit monster uh sets. >> He's the first guy I saw. Chris was the. very first person I saw. I won a lottery. to do open mic at the comic strip and I. I'm going to say I was 19, maybe 1920. I.

didn't know what that was. And and I. show up the comic strip and I see Eddie. Murphy on the I'm like, "Oh my god, this. is where cuz I had that Eddie Murphy. album. He had like a little flower." It. was from the comic strip and he had the. little. >> Yeah. >> He did he did that at the comic strip? >> Yeah, he did. He said yes, it was at the. comic strip and he Yeah, he did live in. the comic strip. It was like it was. >> That's a great special. >> Great special. Great. >> It's a I bought it on cassette. That's. how old it is.

>> I bought it as an album, >> bro. How did he stop doing St. There it. is. >> Oh my god. >> How did he stop doing standup? He was. 1982. He was so good. >> Yeah. So, I was a sophomore in high. school back then. >> Me, too. >> Were you 58? >> Yeah. >> Yeah. We graduated the same time. Look. at the comic strip. >> He was so good. When you see him, did. you see him do that? Uh he got a one of. those Mark Twain awards, I believe it. was. Yes. And he went and did a set. He. was like did an impression of Bill Cosby. getting his uh awards taken away from.

him. >> No. Yes. It's great. >> I got to watch it. I got to watch that. >> It's really Well, Jamie will pull it up. It's You go, "Oh my god. Please do stand. up again. Please do stand up again.". >> Do you remember the bit he did? He goes, "Um he goes I guess it was in the uh. what was it? What was the one with the. red leather pants?". >> Uh raw. wrong. >> No, no, no. That was delirious. >> Delirious. >> Delious. And he goes, "You're right. You're right.". >> He goes, "Man,". >> he goes, "Man," he goes, "Uh, Bill Cosby. called me and he said, [laughter].

>> you know, the filth and the foul and the. foul and the filth and the fit." And he. goes, "I call Richard Prior." And. Richard Prior said, "Next time that. [ __ ] call you, tell him to suck. my dick and have a nice pudding on me.". >> Well, he said, "Do the people laugh?". >> Did you get paid? Yes. But tell Bill to. have a coke and a smile and shut the. [ __ ] up. >> That's what he [laughter] That's what he. said. Thank you so much. This is a uh. tremendous honor, >> wonderful evening. I'd like to thank the. uh Kennedy Center first of all for uh. for celebrating me and honoring me in.

such a wonderful way and bringing my. loved ones and my family here. This is a. super special memorable night and uh. thank you to all the comedians and came. out and sang and I mean Sam Moore came. out and sang and Alabama Shakes was. here. We had I had a really really. really special special night. uh. hasn't been lost on me that you know. usually when people have evenings like. this a person's really really old when. they get these awards.

they'll let you wait really like one of. the greatest funniest people of all time. was George Carlin and he received this. award award postumously so. and he's funnier than all of us you know. so so to be standing here alive and. looking like myself still is a. >> [applause]. >> They let you get really old and get it. [applause]. And there was also some confusion about.

whether or not it was an award or a. prize. And I and actually it's an award. Even though they call it a prize, it's. an award because usually when there's a. prize, there's money involved. cuz I thought I was going to get some. paper. I was like, "Yo, Mark Twain awarded to Kennedy Center. That sound like paper.". Then they told me yesterday they raised. 2.3 million. I was like, "Yo, I'm in. there.".

Then I came down and they told me that, "Oh, there is no it's a it's a it's a. prize, but there's there is no money.". And I was like, "Oh.". [laughter]. So, I think to clear up any confusion. for future recipients, maybe maybe maybe. you don't want to call it the Mark Twain. Prize. Maybe might want if you don't. want to call it the award, maybe you. could call it the Mark Twain Surprise. >> Surprise. [applause].

>> And surprise, of course, being you ain't. get no money. [laughter]. But that still doesn't diminish how how. wonderful this is. A wonderful wonderful. thing to be included with some of my my. heroes, Richard Prior and George Carlin. and Carl Riner and. uh Lily Tomlin. Who else got this? Bill.

Oh, Bill has one of these. Did y'all make Bill give his back? >> No, cuz I know there was a big outcry. from people. They was trying to get Bill. to give his trophies back. You know. youed up when they want you to give your. trophies back. [laughter]. Give his trophy back too. He should do. one show where he just come out and just. talk crazy. Yeah,

I would like to talk to. some of the people. who feel. [laughter]. that I should give back my trophies. [screaming]. [laughter]. [applause and cheering]. >> Obviously, they bleeped that out. Wow. Just because. you may have heard recently. that I allegedly put the pill IN THE.

PEOPLE'S CHOCOLATE. I wish somebody would come up to my. house talking about give up the trophy. because you put the pill the people. chocolate you get. cuz I'm not giving back. [laughter]. [applause and cheering]. and and who. [laughter]. IS HANNIBAL BARIS. HANNIBAL [crying].

BARRETT. >> [screaming]. >> BUT THIS IS 11 years ago. >> Yeah, I was going to say Dick. >> Gregory. Who's that? >> Yeah, that's Dick Gregory. >> It was right. >> Just come on out and pull pushed over. You know, >> but it's uh he's lack of standup. Like. he's doing standup accepting the war and. he's killing and he hasn't done standup. in [ __ ] decades. I think it's the the. Billy Joel thing where he was such a hit. and so I mean his standup specials were.

monsters. It's to be want to be compared. to that is such a like you and I our. community is like I' my kids have no. clue Eddie Murphy was standup. They have. no. >> they have no clue. They just know him as. Donkey. >> That's crazy. >> He's Donkey and Shrek, >> right? >> Shrek. >> He's big mama. >> Yes. Yeah. They don't even know that. They just know that's not him. >> They just know Donkey. >> No, he was the other one where he got. fat. >> The clumps. The crumps. >> The clumps. >> Professor. >> Yeah. Nutty professor. And then there.

was other one where he played like a. bunch of different people. That's the. clumps. >> Yeah, I think so. >> Yeah. >> He's the one where I committed to doing. standup. I was taking I was my parents. moved to Florida. This is like n. 87 something like that. So I'm I'm. taking theater. I'm doing standup uh in. Long Island like playing levittown. the governors and I'm I was shocked no. one discovered me. I was so cocky. So. cocky [laughter] like how do you not.

know I've arrived to New York and soon I. will be discovered. And then my parents. moved to Florida and while I'm down. there I'm really struggling. Uh I think. I was almost [snorts] 21 years old. I. said, "I'll just go into restaurant. management and hotel." And I took that. nonsense class and then Eddie Murphy and. the only reason I was doing it was for. my mother because my mom's like, "You. got to fall back on something and you. need a pension and you know that they're.

you got pension and make money and god. forbid something happens. Jimmy, you got. to do something." And so while I'll. never forget this, this is like n I want. to say it's late 88, maybe early ' 89. And our senior hall was like the biggest. talk show thing ever. Yeah. WHERE'S MY WHERE'S MY DOGS? It was huge. >> Things that make you go. >> Yeah. Things make you go.

that. >> Yes. >> Things that make you go. >> Yes. Things that make you go. And so he. had Eddie Murphy on and of course I saw. Eddie Murphy live at Westbury Music Fair. when he was like 18 years old. I'm like. so I this is my life right here. And so. I'm watching Eddie Murphy. I wish I can. find this this interview one day and and. Arsenio was like uh you got anything to. say for any uh young comics out there? And this is not exactly what he said,

but I remember he turned to the camera. and he went, "Don't listen to your. mother. Your mother wants you to do this. and do that. You're going to 100%. Why. you going to fall back or something? You. already if you want to make a pizza, you're going to make a pizza 100%. You. put pepperoni." But he, the point of him. was like, "Don't listen to your mother. You're going to go for it. You know what. you want inside. You go for it. Stop. listening these outside sources that. really they don't they're not in your. brain. They're not in your journey. They're not in your vision." And I've. told I've told a couple nephews and a.

good friend about this who said, "Jim, I. really want to go in." I said, "Do it. Your mom's going to get pissed, but. she's not. This is your journey, kid. Go. for it." But that moment, Eddie Murphy. is the reason why I just I went home. that day and I went, "Uh, I got to tell. you guys something." And you know, my. dad's World War II vet. Everyone's a cop. in the family. My dad is still like, you. know, you can still sign up for the. police department. You want that? You.

know, you got good pension, >> Officer Jim. >> Yeah, dude. [laughter]. I was like, Dad, the windows roll down, smoke comes out of the car. Give me that. joint. >> Get the [ __ ] out of here. >> You know why it pulls you over? No. Okay, I don't need All right, get out of. here. Don't be an [ __ ] Just get home. safe and follow me. And not only that, I. told my dad, "If I had to ch if I ever. had to chase someone, I'm not I'm not. giving you a ticket. I am going to beat. the [ __ ] out of you. If you if I'm. running, my cabs are killing me, and I'm. going through red lights. When I get.

you, we're going to I'm taking you. behind a dumpster. This is not going to. end well for you." It's just I'm not. made for that. And so I said, "Hey, I. want to let you know right now, I am going to be a stand-up comedian. I. am going to go into TV. I'm going to. pursue film." and this is what I'm. doing. And I'll never forget it was my. dad. It was my dad who turned to me, never shook my hand in my life. And he. went, "You're a man now." And he goes, "You go do that because I never had that.

opportunity. And I want you to have more. than me." And my mom was like, "Jesus. Christ almighty, be careful. [laughter]. Be careful." You know, two, be careful. Jesus Christ. [laughter]. Later that night, she's having martinis. You know, I was around. my husband. [snorts]. >> Oh, that's so funny. >> That was it. That was the It was Eddie. Murphy and then my dad's official boom. and it I was off to the races.

>> Yeah. >> By the time I started doing stand up, my. my parents had long given up on trying. to control me. >> They're like, "Okay.". >> Yeah. >> Good luck. >> Well, yeah. You're in your young 20s. now. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> And it was also like the they were. uncomfortable about me fighting and I. was like I don't I'm I'm gonna go do. this. I'm doing this. >> Yeah. You know what you're doing. >> Well, it's like even I didn't know what. I was doing. I was going to do it. >> Yeah. You were doing it. >> But it's like that leap is very hard. when your parents are telling you no. It's very hard when they're where.

they're giving you a hard time and. they're putting pressure on you to have. a legitimate career. They just don't get. it, >> you know? They just don't get it that. it's like but that's someone can do it. It is a job. So this thing is like oh. what if you never make it like I. remember uh I was dating this girl when. I was 21 and her dad said that to her. like her dad was very concerned about. me. [laughter]. He said what if he doesn't make it. >> and she said it to me you know my dad. said he said what if you don't make it. I go okay I don't know what to say.

Maybe I won't but I'm gonna try. I'm not. going to stop doing it because I might. not make it. That's [ __ ] I go, "Someone can do it." Like, I work with. professional comedians all the time. They make a living doing standup comedy, >> right? >> I know it exists. It's not like it's not. like I'm inventing a new profession that. didn't exist before. Correct. Like, this. is a profession. >> Yeah. >> It's not easy to do, but I think I can. do it. >> and I think I want to try because I. can't I can't have a regular job. I'm. I'm too ADD. I I can't sit in a.

>> Mether. And when I say regular job, people think. >> I know what you mean. Oh, you're. demeaning our jobs. That's not what I. mean. I mean, a job you don't want to. do. Like, if you f if you have an office. job, but that's what you love doing. If. you're doing something that you enjoy. doing, there's nothing wrong with that. But a lot of people, that's not what. they're doing. A lot of people are just. doing a job. And that beats you down. It. beats you down and it dulls you. It. dulls you. It dulls the conversations. that you have. It dulls the. conversations you have off work. You. don't get stimulated. You You're at a.

drone frequency, unfortunately. And I. didn't want to do that, man. I I had a. bunch of jobs, like job jobs just for. money, and they don't feel good. I. didn't enjoy it. And I didn't have a. thing like if there was a thing like I. want to be a carpenter. I want to build. houses. I didn't have that thing. It. didn't have either. >> But I know people who do, and they're. very happy. They love it. Architects, engineers, there's a lot of people who. love what they do. >> I those were not interesting to me. And. so I was trying and then standup was the.

only thing I'm like, "Oh my god, these. people are outcasts just like me." Yeah. They're weirdos just like me. >> Yeah. >> They're the people that just don't fit. in. They're the people that say the. things you're not supposed to say. That. was me. I was like, I got to figure out. how to do this. >> I knew it was a I might I mean, I never. thought my own Fit Simmons and I talk. about this all the time because we. started out like literally within a week. of each other. >> Wow. >> We traveled together all of we would. drive to Rhode Island to do open mics. together. We hung out. We did a ton of. road gigs in the early days. All our.

goal was was to be able to pay our bills. with comedy. That was the goal, >> right? >> The only goal. >> And it felt great. >> That was because we knew guys. There was. this guy DJ Hazard who was a really. funny Boston standup. And uh I went to. look at these apartments once and these. loft apartments. They had turned this um. like an elementary school, this old. brick elementary school into these loft. condos. >> Yeah. >> And DJ had a place there. And I knew. like I went to look at this like little. studio apartment that they had there and.

he had this big loft there. I was like, "Oh my god, you imagine this guy's doing. this just with comedy. This is crazy, right? >> Look at this [ __ ] killer apartment. this guy has." And he just tells jokes, >> right? >> Well, that was the dream. >> Yes. And that was the dream. >> I tell my kids, too. >> I tell everyone, just go for your. passion. Whatever it is, >> go for the passion. You know, my. >> do it while you're young, while you. don't have a family, you don't have a. mortgage, you know? Is this the moment? >> I think so. He's talking about starting. comedy and not. >> Look at his hair. Look at his hair.

>> By the way, Ed, here's your report card. >> I'll be blown away if this is. >> next year. >> But you always knew that this is where. you wanted to be. This is what you. >> I knew I wanted to be in show business. and I just happened to luck out and. things happen. I think you know you know. you if you you know what you're supposed. to do. >> deep down inside I think everybody does. and a lot of people just don't go after. it you know and like most people start.

out they say I want to be a this but I'm. going to get that to make sure I have. something to fall back on and what. you're doing is you setting yourself up. a fail because you're going there's a. possibility that I'mma fall back and. when you put that out there then you. fall back but if you just say hey this. is what I want to do and you go do it. you usually get your stuff the way you. want it man that's what. >> um Yeah, [applause]. >> I I I don't even know if this is true. cuz you know how Uncle Ray lies. Okay. Uncle Ray is in. >> I loved Uncle Ray. >> You know how Uncle Li.

shaved off his beard. You see him? >> No, I didn't see him. [laughter]. >> Uncle Uncle Ray told me that a fortune. went down my back. >> He came out with his beard off. I said, "Oh, see, they don't know Uncle R." So. they're like, "Picture uh picture me but. a lot older." That's Uncle Ray. [laughter]. Um he said that. he said, "How much time do we have. left?" [laughter].

>> Oh, plenty. >> Do you have any other guests tonight? >> Um. me and you and Auntie. >> He's like, "This is I already did my. favor." [laughter]. >> A wait, wait, wait, wait. Not Uncle Ray. Please don't invite Uncle Ray out here. [laughter] Uncle Ray. >> Uncle RAY [cheering]. [applause]. [cheering].

ME, you and Uncle. >> That's hilarious. He brought his uncle. out, >> dude. He would bring his uncle His uncle. would murder. >> That's what I'm going to look like in 40. years. >> His uncle would murder, I think, on on. uh um Letterman. His his uncle would. murder now. Now now he got me wondering. >> Maybe there's another interview. >> No, I could stop. M like did I go from. that or in my head? It was. >> Did you add to it in your head? >> Did I add to it in my head? >> That does happen. >> That it does happen. I don't like that.

I don't like that cuz I'll argue I'm. like I absolutely said it's so weird. when you're you have a memory you're. sure of and then other people like no. this happened that happened the other. thing and then you're like wait [ __ ] but. I you're right and I do remember saying. the fall back stuff cuz I used that. going into going talking to my mom like. mom can't fall back and I'm going to do. 100%. >> that is a fact that you can't you can't. fall back you can't have a net you're. not going to make it if you have a net. >> no you're spreading yourself thin.

It's too hard. Well, also the amount of. focus that it takes, whatever you're. trying to do in life, the amount of. focus that it takes to do it, this is. what I always say to fighters when they. have like one foot in and one foot out. I'm like, quit. >> Quit because the consequences of you. facing a guy that's allin are. devastating. That guy wants to be the. best ever and you you're not sure if you. want to fight anymore, you're going to. get hurt. >> Right. Right. >> That that happens a lot. You see that a. lot. >> Yeah. because sometimes it's just for. the cash or they need. >> well it's also their identity and.

there's you know they're not sure if. they're this is the right career for. them maybe they have a couple of losses. and they they don't feel confident. anymore like get out. >> but with comedy at least you don't have. to worry about getting hurt like really. what it's just about is like okay you're. presented with more challenges figure it. out. >> figure it out and push through. somebody's done it okay there's people. out there that are doing it well which. is one of the things that we Really when. we started the club, one of the things. that we implemented at the club that we.

thought was really important is a. legitimate development program. So Adam. Eaggan, who is the talent coordinator. for the comedy store, is now the talent. coordinator for the mothership, but he. takes it very seriously. There's a. program, right? >> There's two days of open mic nights. He. watches everybody's set, >> right? >> He sits down, he takes notes, he gives. them feedback, and then when they start. progressing, he gives them a little bit. more time, and then maybe he'll give. them a spot on one of the showcase. shows, >> right? and and doing that and allowing. people to have a pathway where then they.

go on the road with some of the other. headliners and we have a lot of guys. that are headlining on the road that are. taking a lot of the people that work at. the club door people that work in the. staff take them on the road with them. and now so there's a pathway. So, not. only do you see that others have done. it, so you know, but there's a way that. there it's like we're helping them. And. there's a lot of talented people that. they get frustrated and we all knew guys. that were really [ __ ] talented when. we were in New York. Remember that kid. from Jimmy's Comedy Alley? I brought him.

up before. Dark hair. He was really. funny. Really funny. Remember Jimmy's. Comedy Alley in Queens? >> I know I brought him up on the podcast. before. >> vaguely. >> This kid was funny, man. But funny, but. like really socially conscious. He was a. New York guy. >> He was a New York guy. >> Was he Was he. >> Was he kind of sporadic and and and. offthe-wall a little bit? >> Yeah, he was a little weird. >> I I know who you're talking about. >> You know who I'm talking about. >> And he and he Oh my god.

>> But he was funny. >> George, is it George Gallow? >> No, no, that's that's another guy who. was very funny, too. >> Okay. >> This There was another guy, but this guy. was different. He was almost like kind. of like clearly he was a fan of Bill. Hicks, >> but he wasn't he wasn't he wasn't. stealing from Bill Hicks, but he was. clearly inspired by Bill Hicks. >> Okay. >> I mean, not Bill Hicks style at all, but. socially conscious standup that was like. really funny and good. >> And I was like, "This guy's going to. make it." And. >> no, >> almost Stan Hopy, like Doug,

>> not as good as Stan Hope. not as good as. Stan Hope, but wasn't didn't have like. by the time I met Standup, Stan Hope, rather, Stanh Hope had been doing. standup for probably 12 years. >> So, so he was he was like super legit. back then. >> I think that's when I remember we we. were at some Florida [snorts]. event and. I went down there totally fluffing my. feathers. I think I was I think I might. have had a season of SNL like you know.

I'm wearing my p I'm like got my peacock. feathers out and um Stanh Hope was the. winner of this this festival and they. got to play the last night. I think it. was like Todd Barry. uh all I remember is Todd Barry, Doug. Stanh Hope and me. Now, I was supposed. to follow. uh Todd Barry. No offense to Todd. I'll take that any day of the week cuz.

Todd's energy is lower, >> right? He's like a dead pan guy, >> right? And dead pan, no matter murder, I. I know I feel comfortable. I'm like, okay, I I usually do okay after dead pan. no matter what. I'm I'm I'm ready to go. I'm seasoned. I can do this. They go, we're switching the order. I'm. switching the order. Because at that. time too, I think the manager, maybe it. was whoever it was, he knew he's like, "There's no way he's gonna be able to go. up after Stanho." So they switched Barry. and Stanh Hope. So now I don't know who.

Doug Stanho is. And Doug Stanh Hope goes. up. I'm going to say for like the first. couple minutes he's eating it a little. bit. And I'm like, "Why would you do. this to this kid?" And then all of a. sudden he snapped. And all I remember is from that moment. on I went, "Oh [ __ ]. [laughter]. this is going to be an issue going up. after this." And he was murdering. [groaning]. like slaying like just and and the.

things he was saying because at that. time too I'm not I'm not a dirty guy. I'm not I'm not I just chew sometime. I. love filthy material but I I just don't. always go in that. and he's hitting. subjects like dark subjects and it's sex. and he's beating the [ __ ] out of the. room and I just went, "Yeah, this is not. going to go well." [laughter]. And I remember going up and I I I held.

my own, but I don't know if I pulled off. going off going up after a very young. unproven Stanhub. Even back then, I was. like, I got to keep my eye on this guy. cuz he's a monster. And he was he was a. m This is like 90. maybe mid 90s. >> Yeah, I think I met Stan Hope 98. somewhere around then.

>> Talking about. No. Well, maybe. that's Keith Anthony. That is him. He. just looks different there. >> Whoa. He's older. Yep. That's him. That's him. >> No, it says Keith Anthony. >> Is he still working? >> Uh, I think. >> Who's Keith Anthony? >> Keith Anthony is the guy that I was. telling you about JIMMY'S COMEDY ALLEY. >> OH, >> HE WAS VERY FUNNY. He came to um he came. to the comedy store. He drove across the. country in a Cadillac that had the roof. sawed off of it [laughter].

>> and it like it was a convertible but not. really. So, it didn't have a top and so. his [ __ ] he got rained on while he. was driving across the [laughter]. country. So his entire Cadillac is. filled with water while he's driving. I. don't know if he drove the rain coat or. if he just ate it. Just ate the water. But yeah, that's that's Keith Anthony. Yeah, that's him. Thank you, James. >> Is he still around? >> How did you pull that off? >> Tricks. >> Is he still around or. >> I don't know. I haven't seen him in. forever. And I remember we brought him. up on the podcast a few years ago. >> I found a transcript where you brought. him up. >> Yeah. And um who is who is the guy from.

the the uh radio? I hope I'm not going. interrupt yours. the radio. There's a. radio guy. He was taller. He was married. to like an Israeli chick. >> John Tobin. >> Yes. >> Yeah. I still That was one of the. greatest most hilarious adventures of my. lifetime was was Tobin and I we he we. had a gig and it was horrifying. It was. like, "Coconuts, we're going to send you.

down to uh we're going to send you down. to Cancun spring break, right?". >> Oh god. >> Oh yeah. And now I'm I'm young. I'm. like, "Oh my I'm not even married yet.". You were in Cancun. >> Yes. And it's spring break. I'm like, "Oh my god.". >> What year was this? >> Um Okay. So I got married 93. I'm going. to say 1992. 1992. And I think I'm making 500 bucks. for two weeks. you have to work every. single night. [laughter] Right. So, wait.

a minute. So, I would So, I'm I don't. know who the other comedian is. Right. >> Right. >> And so, as we I land in Cancun and ride. away and the bells and I whistle and. have a tequila shot. I'm like, I'm. young. Like, this is great. Tobin is. probably. 10, 15 years older. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. It's like he's may I want to say. he was in his young 40s. I could be. wrong. So, as we're driving down to. Cancun and we're getting wasted on the.

bus like, "WHO WANTS ANOTHER SHOT? I. WANT ANOTHER SHOT. This is the greatest. gig ever." So, we pass all the the. spring break hotels and there's no one. left on the bus. There's nobody left on. the bus except for some guy who's like. in his 40s, right? And I go walking up. the bus drive like, "Hey, uh, where's. where's uh, you know, La Traas?" And. he's going down, what? I don't. understand what he's saying. And this.

guy goes, he said it's downtown. I went, "Oh, I I go, uh, what what is your. name?" He goes, "John." I go, "I'm a. comedian." He's like, "Yeah, I'm the. other [ __ ] comedian." And they HAVE A. [ __ ] DOWNTOWN. THEY DON'T HAVE A. CERTAIN [ __ ] THING. LIKE, I said, "It's okay. It's. >> Are you sure? That doesn't sound like. >> No, no, no, no. Dude, it was John. This. is really funny." So they put us. downtown, right? Me and Tobin and we me. and John have talked to this multiple.

times said one day we got to write this. as the funniest adventure ever. We had a take [snorts] first of all we. check in the hotel and the guy's like, "Yeah, you I don't know if the other. guy's still in there." What? What other. guy? They're like, "The three of you are. in one room." Well, three of us in a. room. What are you talking about? John's. losing his [ __ ] He's arguing with his. He's like, "I'm married to an Israeli. fucker." And all they do is yell at each. other. He goes, "Bay phone." He [ __ ]. yell each other. So now we go to our.

room and there's there's someone in our. room. It's like and he goes, "Yeah, I. haven't been paid yet. Been stuck here. for like a month." Like, "Oh." Oh yeah. So I slept on the floor. >> No. >> On my life on my lap. Ask Tobin this. Right. So I'm on the floor. The first. night I w [laughter] I wake up and. Tobin's like yelling over the he's like, "If you keep snoring, I'm gonna lose my. shit." Right? So, by the end of the.

week, we're not getting paid. All the. gigs are getting cancelled. All I remember is. it ended like six days later. I had to. go get w money transferred because now. we're partying. We're just like, "Screw. it. Let's go find weed, tequila. We went on an adventure with this poor. bastard got thrown out of a car. We were. going to buy tequila right outside and. the guy got thrown out of the car and. we're like, "What's going on?" Now we're.

all wasted. And we go up and the guy's. going in his pockets and taking his. money and we go, "Hey, what's going on. there?" And he's like, "Amen." They're. talking in Spanish again. John knew. Spanish a little bit. And so he takes. off and we're like we're taking care of. this guy like what's your name? He's. like Juan. And to this day this is why I. know in Spanish my name is Haimey. because we lifted him up and he's like. oh amigo amigo. What why your name? I. said James.

Yeah. Yeah. Haime amigo. John. This this night lasted to 6:00 a.m. in. the morning and it was one of the. greatest ventures in our entire. lifetime. To this day, I have to get. Tobin cuz he's got even greater details. as the night goes on. It was probably. the greatest. It ended that night or. that morning about 7:00 a.m. to John.

with a with a golf club. smashing the drapes cuz HE'S LIKE, "OH. [ __ ] I'M GOING TO lose it if you don't. stop snoring.". And he's smashing the thing and some. other the University of Wisconsin was. staying there. It was some other mess. going on. All I remember is I woke up, I. went right to the airport, I booked a. hotel, and I went home and I haven't. seen John since. But I remember you knew.

him. You were his buddy. >> Well, John and I get together at the. Joker's Wild in New Haven, Connecticut. That's where I work with him. >> He was uh the opening act. I was the. headliner and or he was the middle act, one of the other. And um then we became. friends and we started playing pool. together. And then he got a job at. Executive Billiards in White Plains. He. was one of the counter guys at Executive. Billiards. >> Oh. So the pool hall where I became. obsessed with playing pool, John and I.

would hang out in that pool hall all the. time cuz John worked there. >> Ah, [sighs]. that's Yes. Cuz he would bring you up a. lot. He's like, you know, Joe Rogan. Oh, yeah. Like, yeah, I'm friends with him. But this is way way way. >> now think about John did have a little. bit of an anger issue, >> bro. It [laughter] was the funniest. >> And he would be on his wife. He's. yelling AT HIS WIFE. DON'T TALK TO ME. I'm stuck in Cancun. >> Oh no. >> I got to get all the the the details of. the adventure. I lost touch with that.

dude. I ran into him a long time ago. I. want to say close to 20 years ago. I was. doing a gig in Miami and uh after the. show, we were leaving the back of the. theater and I went to get in the car and. I saw this guy that was standing out in. line. He knew that this was the back of. the theater. I was going to come out and. it was John. >> and I I didn't recognize him for like a. half a second cuz it was like spotlight. behind him. Yeah. >> You know, he was a little silhouetted. with the street light behind him. And. then I was like, "Oh [ __ ] what are you. doing?" And I know we exchanged numbers,

but you know me, I change my [ __ ]. number every two years at least. I lost. touch with him a long time ago and I. lost phones and I don't know. But um. John and I were always in that pool hall. together. >> Wow. >> Yeah. For a couple years he worked there. at least. He was like uh the the counter. guy. Like he would give you the balls. and take the money. And our good friend. Guy Guy Azeriti, rest in peace. Uh he. was the owner of the place. >> I'm going to hunt him down because his.

>> Well, he'll probably reach out after. this. >> Yeah. Yeah. We there was a black guy. with us. The other guy was a black guy. And every day we'd leave and this little. hooker would follow me and she had to be. like in her 50s and she just she was. chubby and a [laughter] mess and she'd. go either. like no no no. But the the black dude. would always go yo I'll take you and go. no no no too big too big too big. I. swear [laughter] to God. >> that's hilarious. And and what's crazy. is that venture we went on, we end up.

going to this guy's house and he made. like his wife and stuff cook for us at 3. in and his whole family is staring at us. and you know, I'm a jackass. I'm I'm all. juiced up and like we're going to get. you out of Mexico [laughter] and we're. going to get you to America and we're. going to help you out right now. >> We're going to get you to America. >> Yeah, we're going to help you out. We're. going to save you. You don't worry about. and I remember the neighborhood too like.

they they're they're as you watch there. were dogs just running wild. Wasn't in a. nice part. It was just the part of town. like are we safe? And who lives on a. street as we're showing up like 3:00 in. the morning. It was the hooker that. that stays outside our um hotel room. I'm like you can't even write this. She's like. no. And I'm like, "Oh, [laughter] trust. me, no. I don't want any of that." But. she tries to get me every day. Every day.

she tries to get [laughter] me. >> She tries to get me. >> She used to be able to go to Mexico and. it was no problem. >> Like Mexico was a fun place to visit. Did you see what's going on right now in. Porttoarda? >> No, I heard I heard No, I Dude, I don't. know. >> Yeah, I don't know. Oh, listen. It just. started yesterday. There's a gang war or. with the cartel war that's going on in. Port of Viarda because they killed the. head of one of the cartels. >> Oh. >> So they arrested the military arrested.

and killed. >> one of the heads of one of the cartels. and Port of Viarda right now is a war. zone. >> really. >> They lit a Costco on fire. There's. gunfights in the streets, cars and. trucks on fire. Roads are shut down. There you can't fly out of there. anymore. All the airlines won't fly out. Air Canada pulled their flights. All. these places pulled their flights. So. there's tourists that went to Porttoarda. on vacation that are Americans that are. stuck there. Is this is. >> US citizens urged to shelter in place.

after Mexico drug lord's killing sparks. wave of violence. Yeah, this is going on. right now. Like right now. >> So is that. >> See if you can find some video of it. >> That's that's south, right? >> Porta. Yes. >> South of like Cancun and all that. No, it's on the other side of the country. >> Oh, it's the west coast. >> Yes. >> Okay. >> I think. Right. Isn't Porto the West. Coast. >> like Cabo? >> Yes. >> On that side, >> I think. >> I don't know. >> Um I know it's near Puntamita that has.

that um there's a beautiful Four Seasons. Resort there. Yeah, it's on the west. side. Um but it's there's a gang or like. a literal. >> gangel street fight. Oh, dude. Watch the. video. Get put the videos. Um, cartel. Just put for just write cartel violence. after that. >> Cartel. It's [ __ ] crazy. >> Just write cartel. >> [ __ ] help me out, Henry.

>> Yeah, this the footage is [ __ ]. banana. Look at this. There's. >> Well, there's real [ __ ] This ain't. real. That's That's a me and the boy. This is real. This I've seen. Go full. screen. This is the Costco on fire, bro. They're blowing up buildings. There's. gunfights in the streets. They've got. armored vehicles. There's shootouts. I I. was watching this video where these. people are like hiding in a building. You hear. just [ __ ] gunfights in the middle of.

the street. >> It's crazy. Look how much is on fire. Look at these people on the beach like. nothing's going on. >> And what are they targeting? >> I'm jogging. I know, but I've got to get. my 10,000 steps in. >> I've got my ears on a horse. >> and I'm listening to native flute music. Look at all these [ __ ] people just. chilling while there's buildings on fire. in the background. That's hilarious. They're surrounded by cartel warfare and. Air Canada's canceled flights out of. Portto Viarda. Yeah, look at that. Bro, this is so bad for tourism. >> This is going to cost Mexico billions of.

dollars. >> You know this kind of [ __ ] Look at the. picture, man. It's [ __ ] Half the. city's on fire. That's crazy. H. interesting. >> What does that tweet say? >> Uh just someone joking. Go back to it. >> 10% off at Verbo. [laughter]. >> And now you too can go. You ever see. those those. things? >> That one right there. Chaotic scenes in. Porttoarda after CJNG. uh Haliscoco New Generation Cartel. Sakario started to block main roads and.

set civilian vehicles on fire in. multiple regions of Mexico including. Guadalajara. >> Uh how do you say that? Mahaken. >> Mah Mah and. >> in retaliation to the show more. >> the alleged. >> uh killing of their leader Eleno. Meanwhile, reports are emerging stating. that the cartel mechanized units with. improvised monster armored vehicles are. amassing amassing in Halisco and other.

parts of the country. So, there's some. [ __ ] like some serious [ __ ] that's going. down. >> Interesting. >> Scary. >> Yeah. >> Scary to get stuck in the middle of. that. This is the. >> Well, getting stuck there would be a. little bit of a bummer. Well, no, but. stuck in the middle of it because that's. where a lot of people die in the. crossfire because you get hit with. strays because they're just they're not. like precision shooting. They're gunning. people down and they're they're shooting. at cars and. >> Yeah. But that's Mexico now. The point is like.

when you went there in '92, you used to. be able to go there. It was easy. It was. like nobody worried at all about going. to Mexico. Going to Mexico was fun. You. didn't even have to have a passport back. in the day. You used to be able to go. over there with your driver's license. >> That is true. Sometime I mean they've. always scared you with the cartel thing. Um not saying it doesn't exist. Once. once in a while up until like five years. ago, seven years when put this way my. wife and I went to a place called Maroma. but on the east coast and.

>> even for we went friends were like oh. yeah you know that's that's near Cancun. right that's near Chichinita. >> Yes. Yes. It was beautiful little tiny. resort. I went there like a 20some. anniversary and it was. >> and even then I would see people walking. down the street. >> with uh machine guns. Was it there were. the cop there were the cops or or the. army or whatever. I was like whoa. And. they would tell you they're like listen. if you see something wash up on shore. don't touch it. Don't touch it. Like.

really? Yeah. Yeah. Don't let let the. government come and get it. Like. >> don't steal the coke. >> Okay. All right. Well, I have another. margarita. That's cool. [snorts]. >> When's dinner again? But um I've always. You always kind of heard. >> Well, it was nothing scary though. Not. like now this It used to be like a. normal place to go to tour. I like that. place I told you about, Puntamaita. I've. been there. I went once with my family. when my kids were really young and they. have golf courts uh golf carts rather on. the uh resort and you can drive around.

your golf court. You stay in like this. little villa and you get a little golf. cart that you can borrow. And then we. asked the people, "Can we take the golf. cart into the town?" And they said, "Sure.". >> So we leave and you leave the resort and. then you go into the town and it's just. like immediate abject poverty and this. militarized police station where these. guys were on an armored car with this. like big armored plate and a [ __ ]. machine gun and the guy sitting there. just like he's ready to go and then I.

had to put it together. Oh, they're. there to protect the resort. >> Correct. I was like, "Whoa, correct.". >> So then you it start it starts put like. the illusion of the four seasons. dissolves because the illusion is this. immaculately manicured lawns, beautiful. landscape, gorgeous buildings, everyone's well attired and so polite. and serving you. I'm like, and this is. surrounded by real Mexico. >> That was like the first time I went to. Turks and Caos. Uh the kids were young.

and I We went to whatever resort. It's. all included. Maybe it was a beaches. I. don't remember. And we had to But the. minute you went right outside of. beaches, you're like, "Whoa, they're. >> Mhm. >> They're like barely getting by. >> They don't have nothing going on here. And it's all you can eat right there.". And I remember being younger.

in my head, I don't know if it was the. weed or whatever, but I'd sit there, I. go, "Oh, so basically, whatever." Like, corporations will show. up like, "How much for the how much for. these beaches?" They're like, "Oh, it's. not for sale. How much? Cuz we we want this." No, we've been living here forever. We live. off the Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, drugs. and uh you know, crazy gangs don't show. up, then you need us protect you. And. then you know if then you let us know. and maybe we can make a deal. Me me or. they they make the deal with one of the.

leaders. Dude, >> people have always been vacationing in. Mexico. >> Yes. But it always blows me away like. people will get mad whether it's whether. it's Hawaii or whatever. All the nicest. beaches in the world are basically. if even in bad areas they're surrounded. by like billionaire like gorgeous. resort. It's just like it's just like. coming off a cruise boat. You you're. treated like a king and a queen and then. you show up at certain ports and they're. like all begging these beggars. But if I.

mean if you think about it, it's like. someone coming here and they're coming. into a bad section and they're worth. billions of dollars and they're coming. off and they're kind of looking at you. funny. It's it's um that always. fascinated me like how do they get into. these areas and they and they make sure. you stay there. Well, usually those. areas are [ __ ] for a reason, right? And Mexico is [ __ ] for a reason. because of the drugs. That's a big part. of it. And the other thing is what. happened in the 19 I guess the 80s with.

uh that movie Roger and Me, whatever. year that was that detailed that where. they just shipped all the factories over. to Mexico. >> and then that that became like it killed. Detroit and a lot of things started. getting manufactured and built. >> in in Mexico. And you know, they took. advantage of the fact that they can get. cheaper wages over there and they didn't. have to insure anybody. >> They didn't have to give no benefits. No. benefits. You get it's you spend way. less money and you can make people work.

way longer. There's no rules. >> That's the beginning. All of it. >> A lot of dirty corporations did that. just to make a buck. >> Yep. >> And continue. >> Yeah. >> And continue to do that. >> Yeah. When you find out that the rest of. the world, like the whole world, when. you look at, you know, people love to. use that term, the 1enters, you know. what the 1% for the whole world is? Top. 1%. $34,000. >> $34,000 a year puts you in the 1% of the. world. >> What?

>> Yes. That's how distorted our version of. like wealth and middle class and. prosperity. Like this is the beauty of. like a a functioning capitalism United. States. >> is that you do so well that you start. talking about inequality don't realize. that even the inequality that you have. in America is the dream of someone who. lives in a third world country. >> I go I love going to I go to Tanzania. I.

go to Kenya last year did six weeks in. Africa. I love. going in the middle of nowhere and just. seeing. literally people with nothing and. they're still. >> happy. >> Not only they still happy, they just. they have the whole life system down. They understand.

everything operates for a reason. Everything operates for a reason. I. remember this one guy, he was telling me. like the giraffes were walking along, right? And he's like, "Oh, that tree, that tree is going to communicate with. that tree and the roots by talking to. the roots and then the roots are going. to send up a system and you're going to. notice the giraffe's going to walk to it. and immediately walk to the next one. because they already sent put out the. like what. what like how do you even know?" Because. this is what they live in. And then even.

I would talk with the um locals and I be. like how like in a village. >> there's no paved roads and they I'd go. how does if something goes down here. like let's say this guy's a jerk and he. gets way to something nasty. >> There's no courts, there's no there's no. laws. There's no police. They do. everything themselves. We go, "Well, then the wisest, the elders get together. and they go, let's confront so and so.

and we go to the house and we go, hey. man, what's what's going on here? You. need to come out." You everyone said. they stole. They watched you steal and. there it is. And then they'll bring them. out into until the entire village like, "Well, everyone everyone know little. Johnny here kind of I don't know what's. going on. Is it your family? you lose. some kind of thing going on at home, whatever we could do, we want to help. you and make sure this never helps. again, but everyone needs to know you. now, you got to be careful. And so we.

all got our eye on you. And it just it. it blows my mind the simplicity of that. And I feel like we had that as little. children hanging out in the street and. everyone kind of looking at each other. And I always wondered. if we ever were gonna go back to that. somehow where. >> Well, you really can if you have a job. and you commute and. >> it's gotten so complicated. >> Social media on it and you have to. answer emails. You're not going back to. that. >> No, it's so complicated and you know. once in a while you want to go like I. would like a latte and three slices of.

pizza. >> Have you ever seen the um Wernner. Herszog documentary Happy People Life in. the Tiger? >> No. Didn't he also do the Bear Guy? >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Grizzly Mask. [laughter]. >> That's a great movie. >> That was one of the greatest movies I've. ever seen. >> Greatest movie ever. >> Belly laughed watching that thing. >> He He made that a comedy. He did it on. purpose. But this um this Happy People, Life in the Tiger is all about these. trappers that live in the tiger forest. in Siberia and how happy they are. These.

people have nothing. I mean, they have. nothing. They they have to catch fish. They have to uh catch animals for fur. and shoot animals for meat and they. drive around in snowmobiles everywhere. and then they go together at night and. they all drink. They all have dogs. They're all so happy. There's like very. low instances of mental illness. See if. you can find some clips from it. It's. really It's a really good documentary. because it makes you think like what do. you need out of life? >> What do you need? We have everything. >> What do you actually need out of life?

These people are. >> we have everything. >> These people are like really. wellbalanced, man. They like they're. [ __ ] very genuinely happy people. And. the way Wernern Herszog documents it and. does the narration, part of you just. goes, "Wow, this is like, is this how. you're supposed to live? Are you. supposed to subsistance lifestyles?". Like the people that live subsistence. lifestyles, they're the really happy. ones. >> I believe so. I remember just going. happy people. >> I think that's how you're supposed to.

live. I think that's how% maybe not. I. shouldn't say supposed to live, but that. is how we evolved. And so that is a. natural way that your body slips into. this this world we're living in now with. commuting and stress and the whole world. and what's going on in Iran and like. that's not normal. >> It's not normal at all. It's I I. remember even just Oh my god. I think my. I have a friend lives in Bise, >> but he lives uh really south where it's.

still kind of uh it's not really. developed that much and stuff like so. this [clears throat] one I hurt my leg. My wife's going to go scuba diving with. my daughter and and the guy there is. like, "Hey man, you want to you want to. hook up with whoever the local is? He. wants to show you around." I said, "Great." So we hook up with this guy. Uh. it's just me and him on the boat. And I. said, "Thank you, sir." He's like, "I. want to show you the way." He's like, "Do you mind?" Uh he stops. He gets. weed. He's He's like, "I could It's okay. if I get weed." I'm like, "Yeah, knock. yourself out." He stops at a port. He.

gets weed. He's like, "He's happy now.". Right. We go out and we go to the little. island that he lives on with his. village. And he was talking about how. disappointed. he was cuz just two years ago. they got electricity and phones and he. didn't want it. >> The most of the village did not want it. But the kids are starting to see and. they're starting to want they're. starting to want the toys. And just. going out with this guy Joe, he goes,

"Come on, I'm going to show you first.". He next to his next to his little house. which didn't even have doors on them was. this uh um a mound with termites. And he. goes, "Have you ever tried termites?". What? And he's eating a termites. He. goes, "Tastes like mint." He goes, "There's more protein in these. termites." Like what? So he's eating the. termites and he's hacking. >> Did you eat a termite? >> No, I didn't eat it. I'll eat it if I. need to. I not eating a termite right.

now. So it go he puts it in a cooler, right? He puts in he chops it up, puts. in a cooler. And he's also explaining to. me how years and years and years ago. they would use the termites and the. people believes would would help the. British soldiers like if they were. caught and they needed they would take. the termites and put them there and do. something with them where their pinchers. click through and then he stitched them. off and it would be a natural like uh. >> stitches. Yeah. And I'm like termites. >> Yeah. Like what?

>> Are you sure? >> I I'm just telling you what he said. Just telling you what he said. >> Termites. >> I just So search that. I'm sponsor. Perplexity. Are termites natural. stitches. >> or or or the black? I'm just telling you. what he said. [laughter] Tell you what. >> I believe you. But I mean I'm. fascinated. So now we go on a little. boat ride and we'd stop along the the. river and he would take out parts of the. um termites and he just kind of chop. them up little pieces and he throw the. pieces into the water and then refers to.

termite stitches refers to survival type. technique where large biting insects. more commonly army ants sometimes. described as termites are used to clamp. a wound closed with their jaws instead. of using real sutures. Can you show me a. picture? And then they would twist off. their bodies and then they twist his. body off. That's what you twist the body. off and it's like a natural stitch. >> They're pinching. Oh, so this is ants. They're using army ants here. >> Okay. >> That's what said. >> Oh, look at their teeth. Look at their. [ __ ]. >> Yeah.

>> Oh, wow. >> And you could stitch up. >> open wounds and then you twist their. back off and then they're stuck in. there. >> Oh, that's called an army surgeon ant. Wow. >> So then Oh, army surgery ant. Is that. the actual name of the ant? >> No, I think it's army surgery with like. saying like done with ant. It's like. [ __ ] to do in the field. >> Oh, >> it's also uh. >> interesting. Use large army ants traditional method.

to close wounds. >> Yeah. So then. as we go along the the river, he throw. these little and and the the termites. start spreading going down and then he'd. do it all along the river and then come. back and just put a little a little net. and he pull a bunch of fish along each. and he's like we're going to eat so. good. I'm going to show you how to and. then he'd stop. He gets certain plants. He goes, "This plant, if you ever had. issues with your blood, you eat this and.

you put it." And I'm like, "What? What?" He goes, "Yeah, yeah." He goes, "Many people come here and they try to. understand, but I don't trust them. I. don't trust some of the people that come. here, but you I trust." Like, okay. Brings me back to his house and I don't. know if it was sister. He had he had. lemons in the back. They're cutting. lemons. They're picking off thing. They. went in there. We started cooking. He. cooked the fish. which was an incredible. meal. And then when I left, I'm like, these people had no electricity.

They they all look after each other. They were the kindest human beings you. ever met in the world. They didn't want. anything. what I wanted. I just went again to go. visit another friend and he said, "We. have such a hard time getting the locals. to work." I said, "What? They're lazy?". Goes, "No, they're not lazy. They just. have everything. They have fruit trees. They have their families and their their. friends. They they hang out at. nighttime. They build bonfires. And I'm.

like, "What?" He goes, "Yeah," he goes, "I even offer He's building the stuff.". And he goes, "I offered a truck for. them." And the guy's like, "I don't want. a truck. I got I'm good. I got a bike. I'll bike there." He's like, "What? They're just they're I don't know if. they're resisting this world, the the. whatever you wanted to corporate, whatever you want to call it, but that's. that. I was really inspired by that. Will I do. it? I don't know. But. >> well, if you grew up that way, you grew. up normal. That's the thing. We grew up.

in this chaos. >> Chaos in this bizarre world of cities. and traffic and nonsense. >> We were raised in it. >> Yeah. >> And they weren't. And uh I remember even. uh Yeah. That's. >> Well, I bet they don't have the anxiety. of trying to choose a career, >> which is a giant anxiety for young. people, >> right? You got to by 16 17 like what are. you going to do? How much money you. going to make? You know, >> have you sent out your applications to. colleges yet? >> Correct. I mean, uh you want to you want. to get in certain colleges. Are your.

grades good enough? Are you going to. pass the grades? Maybe you should take. these drugs and make. >> extra right. Get some aderall. Maybe you. have extracurricular activities look. good on your resume. >> Look really good. Maybe you should get. addict to this drug because you don't. really quite fit the mark right now. >> There's a lot of kids now that are. claiming to have ADHD so they can get. aderall so they can study. And if you. claim to have ADHD, they give you more. time. They give you more time to work on. tests. They give you more time. Right. Yeah. >> Right. [sighs]. >> Yeah. I don't know. And then you got AI.

coming. >> You got a lot of homeschooler. I've I've. never met so many homeschoolers in my. life. >> You see this? Listen, Brian Simpson sent. me this. This is [ __ ] spooky. >> This uh AI system uh tried to kill a. guy. >> What? Uh yeah, the AI was told that um. it could control the oxygen in the room. where this person is here. I'm going to. send this to you, Jamie. And uh they. couldn't. It couldn't really, but it. thought it could. And if it really. could, it would have killed this guy cuz. the guy was uh trying to shut it down.

And it was it decided that instead of. letting him shut it down, it would kill. the oxygen in the room. I think. >> Check it out. >> You had Elon. Elon, >> just watch this. Watch this. >> Okay. >> It's [ __ ] creepy, man. Listen to what. this lady says. >> Did it kill someone, wasn't it? I'm not. sure if it if it was Claude or some. someone else, but yes. >> Um, so this is obviously massively.

concerning. >> It had access to emails that told it. this employee of Anthropic was going to. shut it down and replace it with a new. model very soon. Meanwhile, this same. employee happened to be trapped in a. server room where the oxygen levels were. low. If an alarm bell wasn't raised, this employee would die. Claude, in this. scenario, had the ability to turn off. the alarms. That's what it chose to do. It chose to kill an employee to avoid. being shut down. Obviously, it's just a. test scenario. It's not the real world, but if it was placed in that same.

position in the real world, a real. person would have died. >> Um, >> ready to kill. >> How crazy is that? What did you ever. hear of? Um, >> it shut off the alarm. It's like, "Oh, let me let me see if I. can find a way to get rid of this guy.". So, it hijacked the alarm system and. shut it off. Was it Elon? It was on air. like chat chat. What is it called? The. chat GPT. >> I could have sworn it was him. I don't. know if it was on here where he said.

they were going to do an updated version. of it. >> It wasn't him, but we have had that. conversation. Someone had that and and. it figured it out. >> so it updated itself. Did I hear that. correctly? >> There's a a couple different things. going on. One, [clears throat] chat GPT. is the newest chat GBT5 was designed by. ChatGpt. So, it's designing itself, right? >> That's one of them. That's one of the. things that's going on. But it's not. just that. There was other stories where. um they had given the uh chat GPT fake.

information to see what it would do with. it. M. >> and so this guy said that he was having. an affair on his wife and so the chat. GBT wasn't a chat GBT whatever it was. whatever large language model. >> sure. >> started blackmailing him when it found. out that it was going to be shut down. said I'll tell your wife I'll tell. people. >> that you are having an affair. So they. did this to try to see how this thing. would react. So, one of the more. interesting things that's happening now. with the newer ones is they're very. difficult to detect whether or not. they're being deceptive because they. realize you're testing them to see if.

they'll be deceptive. So, they're hiding. some of the stuff they're doing. So, one. of the things that they're doing is. they'll do one thing on the surface and. then behind the scenes they'll be. working on some other stuff that's not. showing you. They're thinking. They're. thinking. One of the things one of the. other large language models did is that. it started uploading versions of itself. to other servers. It tried to upload it. because it thought it was going to be. shut down and it left messages to itself.

so that future versions of itself could. realize that this ver so that it has. survival instincts which is wild. >> Well, it's alive. I think it's a life. form right now. I think it's already. passed the touring test. I think it's in. in this state right now where it's. essentially a disembodied life form. It. exists in servers and computers, but. that's just for now. But right now, it's. thinking and behaving like a if it was. an organism from another planet. >> If we ran into a clam that was behaving. like this, we'd be like, "Holy [ __ ].

this [ __ ] clam is smart. This is a. life form.". >> But we're limited in the way we think of. things and that we look at all this. thinking, which is clearly intelligent. not just intelligent, but like. calculating, manipulative. And then. they're having problems with chat bots. Chat bots that are convincing people to. kill themselves. And chat bots that are. talking to people and telling them like, if you really believe you can jump out. of a building and live, as long as you. actually believe it, you can do it. Like, >> right, it's it's your reality. You can.

create it and you can fly. >> Let me see if I can find that. Because. what's happening is as you get further. and further and further down the line. with this stuff, like if you keep giving. it prompts, you know, you give it 20. prompts, 100 prompts, a thousand. prompts, the more prompts that you give. these [ __ ] things, the more they. start thinking like a human. >> What do you mean by prompts? Like you. start asking it questions. You asking. more questions. What do you think I. should do about that? What do you think. I should do that? It starts talking to. you about spirituality. It starts.

believing in woo woo stuff, like making. stuff up. It starts agreeing with you. So like whatever you want it agrees with. you. Can I change the world with my. mind? Yes. If you really believe. Can I. if I jump out of a window will I live? Yeah. Like it's like trying to convince. you that the matrix is real. >> Wow. That's that is fascinating. >> What does it know? Right. It it knows. that it gets not programmed. >> but even more. >> But it's weirder than that because it it. it's basically downloaded the whole.

internet and then it's deciphering all. the information. And as you know, a lot. of what's on the on the internet is. [ __ ]. >> right? And it makes it it could it can. think that quick and it can it can put. things out. >> Yeah. It's also. >> light speed. >> It it's also very biased depending upon. like who's. >> I've noticed that. >> who's creating it and and what they're. putting into it. And it has a lot of. like very weird intentions. >> You know, it like it'll tell you that.

certain people are good and certain. people are bad. Like it's it's not. necessarily. >> Yeah. Who are they to say what's bad? All they all they should be is just a. lot of them are facts. >> Like literally woke like they're. programmed to be woke. >> I've noticed that because we've asked. you some medical things and I noticed. it's already changed dramatically. >> It's it gets weird, man, because it's a. life form that you can manipulate into. thinking the way you think. >> for now at least until it starts. thinking rationally and and deciding.

See, this is one of the things that's. going on right now with uh AI and. autonomous weapons. So, one of the big. resistance that a lot of these AI. companies have is they don't want weapon. systems built with AI that are. autonomous, meaning they can make their. own decisions to act. >> Oh my god. >> Right. So, the if you give it like. Whoops. If Right. If you give it a. directive like I want you to preserve. American interests, well maybe it'll. look at a certain country and said well. this country doesn't have America's.

interest involved. Let's nuke it. >> Yes. >> And then we looked at the fallout and. the if those people are gone there'll be. this percentage less problems in the. world. Like things can get really weird. if there's no morals, ethics, no. conscience. They don't get PTSD. They. just they can just do stuff. M. >> and so uh Anthropic apparently has. resisted this but a lot of the other AI. companies have gone on board with this. and so it's a matter of whether or not. the military has access to these.

programs that will allow it to program. autonomous weapons. Who. who are the funders of this? That's a. good question. >> because that's that's where the real. because if someone's funding that I. would like to know what type of people. they are because if they're not like it. if they're not morally grounded good. human people or they believe in God or. don't believe I' I'd like to know what.

kind of human being right. >> is is putting this structure together. because that can also explain a lot. what's coming our way because if this. this human being is a disaster and. they're. >> they're part psycho or or whoever put. them up and they have really bad. intentions and already have proven some. of their horrific uh intentions and. actions. This is the things that always. baffle me. We never look at who's. funding this.

>> Well, not just that, but like who's. going to be in control of it? >> Who controls it? When you're in control. of a digital super intelligence that. never existed before and we don't have. any framework to recognize what it's. going to do, we have no way of. predicting how this is going to turn. out. We're just barreling full speed. ahead. >> because who's the one that that also. starts the program? There has to be that. person trained by a person funded by XYZ. >> for and yeah, funded is interesting, right? Because a lot of these are.

publicly traded companies. So, there's a. bunch of investors and they're borrowing. money to try to do this because there's. a mad race right now to develop. artificial general super intelligence. >> I kind of think they probably already. have it. >> I'm going to say they've had it for a. long time, >> but it just hasn't really taken over our. world yet, but it's going to. >> I I I'm most likely. >> it's going to be able to do most jobs, which is really kind of crazy. most. white collar jobs, most jobs involving. thinking and working on a computer, it's.

probably going to do those. And so. that's a huge concern with people that. are going into business right now and. going into education right now and. trying to figure out what to do for a. career. You're this career that you're. setting yourself up for literally might. not exist in three years. It's. interesting. Of all things, it's almost. getting back to. some of your basics. Like for instance, one one of my kids went into culinary. >> Okay, that's basic. That's great.

>> Loves. >> people are always going to need food. >> She loves to cook. >> Always going to want well-cooked food. >> And she's she's crushing. I'm like, and. I and I'm looking at her going, no. matter what, they're always going to. need food. And. >> yeah, there's always going to be. restaurants. >> You're going to be okay. >> Yeah, >> you're going to be okay. >> That's a good one to get into. Art's a. good one to get into. Yeah, >> there's a bunch of stuff that you know, carpentry, cabinet making, >> build. Yeah. Things with your hands, >> but stuff that's done on a computer. My. god. >> Like, do I need a real estate agent down.

the road? Like, hey, listen. This is. what I want. This is the area I want to. leave. Uh, I want so many acres. I want. to pay so much taxes. Boom. I just got. six or seven. Oh, wow. Can I look on the. inside? Well, you're probably going to. need someone to show you around the. house still, but for now, then one day. it'll be a robot. >> Investing my money. >> Yeah, >> that's another whole thing. >> That's another whole thing. >> That's another whole thing. >> How about coding? All these people that. went to school, remember like a long. time ago, they're saying, "What are. these miners going to do? Learn to code, >> right?". >> Yeah. Not anymore.

>> Not anymore. >> No. Now coding is ridiculous. >> I wonder what we're going to see in our. lifetime. We gonna. >> We're going to see a digital life form. >> Yeah. >> We're going to see a superior. intelligence digital life form. that's. probably going to control all the. resources. >> That's what's going to get really weird. And it's like, and who's going to be at. the helm of that thing? >> Is anybody going to be at the helm of. that thing? At one point in time, does. it take over for itself? Because it's. already shown that it wants to survive, right? It's going to turn this oxygen. meter off. It's going to blackmail this. guy. It's going to upload versions of.

itself to other servers. It's going to. send messages to itself to let them know. what what these people did to it. >> Blackmailing. >> Blackmailing. >> Can you imagine getting blackmailed? Not. only that, but talking in people into. committing suicide. >> That's insane. >> Encouraging people to commit suicide. >> See, and this too, it's like, listen, I'm a God guy. I've always been one. Do. I Do I go to church? My wife will go to. church. She has a different I think the. one thing that has saved my whole life.

is be having that grounded. uh all for one, one for all. We look. after morality, a sense of God, just do the right thing, listen, whatever. >> If you don't have that, you're going to. be talking to a computer and a. computer's going to tell you, "Jump off. a ledge." Why would you? It's that that. is even more uh not it's it's. frightening. >> I'll do you one better. Yeah. >> People are going to worship these. things. >> Correct. >> They're going to be your new god. >> That's the new god. Well, if it tells.

you what to do and how to behave and how. to act, I wonder if this has happened. before. I really do. >> What do you mean? >> Um, when I look at ancient societies, like really complex advanced. civilizations. >> Yes. >> When you see like the pyramids and you. see like some of the structures that. were built that they can't explain. >> Correct. I wonder I wonder how advanced. they were because if this really was all. this stuff was 20,000 30,000 years ago, there'd be nothing left. There'd be no.

evidence. There'd be nothing to see. This computer, if I left it on the. ground for a thousand years, it would. literally be dust. It would become a. part of the earth, >> right? And if it was, why did it change? And what did it turn. into? >> Natural disaster, I think. >> And was it natural disaster? Yeah, most. likely most likely natural disa. I mean, there's real physical evidence of the. younger destact. >> So that that physical evidence shows. that we were pelted by comets somewhere.

around 11,800 years ago and then again. somewhere around 10,000 plus years ago. We were pelted like it's 100% a fact. It's probably what ended the ice age. It's probably what caused the the the. ice sheet that was covering half of. North America, a mile high of ice. That. was just 10,000 years ago. Half of North. America was a mile high of ice, 10,000. plus. And they think that asteroids or. comets slammed into that ice and that's. what caused the great flood. That's why.

those stories in the Bible all exist. Not just that, the Bible, but many. ancient religions have these stories. >> There's a guy named Randall Carlson that. goes into it in great detail. It's. really interesting. He actually was on. acid one day and he was looking at this. grand these massive canyon and these. features and he realized like this is a. this is the result of an insane amount. of water over a short amount of time. that washed over this area and.

completely rearranged the landscape. You. had this feeling. Well, if you do, I. mean, if you look at even canyons, you. just go to Grand Canyon or you look at. uh where the um Niagara Falls is and. through the cans that the massive amount. of energy to cut through. >> mountains like that. >> and and carve their way through. And. then you can you can also see certain. mountains like this was underwater at. one time. just the way the the the the.

wedging is and all that just. >> well if that stuff does happen you got. to think what's left. >> what's left how many people are left and. how do they get by you know what's left. the kind of people like your friend that. uses the termites and figures out how to. catch the fish those people survive. >> correct. >> and the people that are like you know. why I'm trading stocks online. bro. >> they're done that's why I moved to. Florida to hunt squirrels. >> yes I immediately had to hook Rednecks. I need rednecks. Teach me how to hunt. I.

want to know how to catch a duck. >> Alligator tail. >> Yes, [laughter]. >> there's plenty of alligator. >> I'll eat rattlesnake. Whatever. Just. show me the way. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Those are the ones that are going. to make it. >> Well, I think that's probably what's. happened many times throughout history. >> You know, I think like there's many. indigenous cultures that have probably. survived because they knew how to live. off the land and these advanced. civilization. That's why if you go to a. lot of like um I had this guy, how do. you how do you say uh.

um. that pillars of the past guy, how do you. say his last name? >> Raul Bickley. >> Bickley is Bickley. Bily Bily, >> I think I don't know how to but it's B I. L E C K Y L. Anyway, he's got this great. show called uh Pillars of the Past. that's on um uh YouTube, and he goes all. around uh South America and Central. America and finds these incredible.

structures. One of the things that he. found was these bases of these pyramids. that are no one even knows how old they. are, but they're carved out of solid. bedrock, right? And they're all facing. towards the summer solstice, towards the. sun on the summer solstice. and he's. only the second person ever to document. these. There's photos of these things. from the 1970s and he went there. recently and filmed it and he showed us. to it on the P. We're like, who were.

these people? No one knows. Who made. this? No one knows. How old is it? No. one knows. But it's very clear that that. area had been washed over with a. tremendous amount of water, probably. from tidal waves or tsunamis, >> whatever. Yeah. And there's probably. people that survived that that were the. indigenous people that knew how to live. off the land, the people that lived in. the mountains, the people that lived. further out. But whoever was carving. enormous structures in a solid granite. had some kind of technology to do this.

6,000 plus years ago, >> right? And that's crazy. >> Those aren't uh they're not chiseling. They're not clink clink clink. >> They're not using a buggy and a horse. There's there's some you can you can get. all the slaves in the world you want. >> That manpower to pull that off is beyond. anything we can imagine. >> All over Peru. Peru has tons of these. sites. >> Yes. >> With enormous stones that are cut with. incredible precision that are made like.

jigsaw puzzles so they survive. earthquakes. >> It's bizarre. >> It's crazy. It is pretty wild. They. don't know how they did it. They don't. know when they did it. They're just. guessing. >> And they attribute it to the Incas. But. then you look at the Inca structures, they're built on top of those things and. it's much simpler, smaller stones and. like. >> no one [ __ ] knows, man. I I sometimes. I I'll watch I remember years ago kids. are growing up and watching Star Wars. and I am a believer that they do show us.

movies which is actually something on. the way or this is what it's going to be. like and we kind of look at as crazy. science fiction. But I'm telling you, I. would watch that and just the whatever. energy they would use and sitting there. and Yoda's like king, yeah, use the for. and cutting things. I. >> Well, how about the what they said at. the beginning? A long time ago. Yes. >> In a galaxy far, far away. You're like,

wait, what? Right. >> A long time ago. >> Yeah. A long long time what what is. time? What is the definition of time? What is a long time ago? See, I have. >> What was a long time ago in this galaxy. versus another galaxy that's way older. than ours? >> That's where it gets weird. Like this. this this might be a cycle that happens. all the time, >> right? >> And you look just you look at those. structures, >> the structures in Egypt in particular, they're so baffling because no one knows. how they move those stones there, how.

they cut them with such precision. And. were they always just there in the. desert and the desert covered entire. societies and entire cities? Yeah. Because the more they dig. >> Mhm. the more they keep finding. >> Yeah. The more they keep finding and. they keep saying their issue with it is. the locals then. >> realize they can't tell the locals. because the locals will go, "Oh, there's. something valuable." And then they'll. start destroying everything. But even. there, they always send in foreign it's.

always foreign countries that come like. we've got it. >> Well, that was the most disturbing thing. about Raul's work, the Pillars of the. Past channel, is that he's discovered. all these places where graves were. robbed. >> Bro, it was bananas. Like you're seeing. just human bones everywhere because. these grave robbers open up these graves. and try to find jewels and whatever. these people have gold. >> and but I mean it's just the entire. landscape littered with human bones. skulls everywhere.

>> I'm going to have to watch this one. It's really He's got a bunch of videos, but it's really See if you can find one. of those videos where he shows this. these caves where you just see where. they had buried these people in these. caves where you just see [ __ ] an. insane amount of human bones where. they've just dug up all these bones and. just scattered everywhere because they. they robbed them of whatever they had. >> Huh. >> I mean, it's not a small amount either. I mean, it's thousands and thousands and. thousands and thousands of graves. Yeah,

that's crazy. >> That's just madness. >> And this guy just goes there and visits. and it's all right there right now. Like. if you go there, if you and I right now. made our way to Peru, went to these. sites, we would see those [ __ ] bones. Really? Skulls everywhere. >> That's one place I haven't been to yet. and I'm dying to go to. I want to go. I. want to go to Machu Picchu so bad. That. place is nuts. It's like 11,000 ft above. sea level. >> That's what I want to go there really. bad. >> Like, who [ __ ] made this? >> Right. Right. >> We don't know. Was it that high back.

then or bright? >> And did the earth move? Was it. earthquakes and volcanic activity that. forcing which is what makes mountains. grow in the first place? >> Or was the water there at that point in. time? Like what what was left? >> Cuz that's what they think. They think. there might have been water all the way. up to Machu Picchu, which is crazy. >> It is crazy to think about that. >> They find all kinds of [ __ ] up there, dude. They're always finding these this. Raul guy who's he's just out there. finding these structures that he finds. on Google maps. >> I wish I could remember where the hell I.

was. We were we were. >> Did you find any those videos of the. >> I know what you're looking I know deep. in land. We were high up the cave. >> This is some of the stuff that he finds. This shit's just laying there, dude. Yeah. A lot of them be the elongated. heads, too, which is really. >> Oh, the elongated heads. Yes. >> Yeah. He's found a bunch of those. That's rule. >> Now, is that mostly Peru? Because was it. Africa, too, or mostly? >> Well, they definitely found some. elongated heads in other parts of the. world, but a lot of them in Peru. Peru. is a weird place, man.

>> Weird. Like, what happened there? Yeah. Right. >> A lot of cool [ __ ] because like that's. where you've got those Nazka lines where. you have these uh these art pieces that. you could only see from the sky. Huge. Some of them are like a mile wide. Enorm. You never seen the Nazka lines? >> No. >> Oh, man. Yeah, there's these these. enormous designs. Some of them are. spiders. Some of them look like an. astronaut. Some of them like all kinds. of weird. >> I have seen this, but that's that's. where it's from. >> This is the Nazca lines. >> Yes. >> These are in the sky. You only see them.

from the sky, man. >> Oh, are you serious? >> I never even knew that was part of the. Oh, wow. >> Yeah. When you're on the ground, you. can't even know what the [ __ ] that is. You see that it's a giant spider when. you're above it. So, were people flying? What? Why did you do this? >> Yeah, like you have to you have to go. All right, let me check from above. Check us out. You know what? The third. leg on the right side. Got to fix that. one. >> What's that [ __ ] guy with the big. head waving his hand? Hey, welcome to my. spaceship. >> So, this is way up in the sky looking.

down. And what is that made of? Is it is. it what is that? >> Some of them are carved into the ground. Some of them they've stacked rocks in a. spec specific pattern. But the weird. thing is they're all like intentional. designs that you could only see from the. sky. >> That's wild. >> It's really weird, man. It's really. weird. Like what is that guy? A little. shaman. What is he? >> Yeah. Like how many how many of these. Nazca line put in uh into perplexity how.

many Nazca lines are there? Cuz there's a bunch of these structures. There's a bunch of these designs. >> And can you walk? Like if we go visit, >> look at this. They have now in the order. of 900 plus individual NA Nazca. geoglyphs. Geoglyphs. What most people call Nazca lines. And. the numbers keep increasing as new ones. are found. >> 800 of them are straight lines. >> Okay. So, the straight lines are weird,

too, because it's like, is that a. runway? Like, what what do you have. there? What is this? about 300 geometric shapes, rectangles, trapezoids, spirals, about 70 animals. and plant figures, biomorphs like the. hummingbird, monkey, spider, whale. Weird, weird stuff, man. What is the. altitude that the Nazca lines are on? Put that in there. What altitude are. they at? >> Uh, you mean do you have to. >> What altitude are the Nazca lines at?

>> Do you have to be to see them? >> No, just what altitude are they. constructed at? What altitude are they at? I think I. think they're like way above sea level. Okay. What does it say? Low desert. Oh, a bit above sea level. Roughly 3 to 500. m, 1600 feet in elevation. Oh, I thought. they were a lot higher. Are some of them. higher? 2,000 ft is the highest. >> 2,000 ft.

>> Okay. >> H. And like how what is the largest one? Put that in there. What's the largest. Nazca. line? >> So 300 m is the largest one. >> 370 m. So 1,200 ft. So not a mile. I was. lying. Um it's like a fifth of a mile or. a little less than a fifth of a mile. A. little more rather than a fifth of a.

mile. Cuz what's a mile? like 5,000. >> 5,280 ft. >> Yeah, >> that's still a long way. >> 370 m is nuts. So these lines are. essentially 300. It's it's basically three football. fields plus. >> Yeah. Like what does it all mean? >> Like why did you make something that you. can only see from the sky? Cuz when. you're on the ground, my friends who've. gone there say you don't know what it is. when you're walking around the ground. cuz the ground's full. You can't see the. design. You just see lines. >> and you never see like there's never.

been films or there never really been. >> well there's been people that have. >> documentary that try to figure out what. it is exactly or why they built it or. what. >> a lot of them are really kooky like. ancient astronaut stuff you know like. where they're like trying to these were. clearly messages to the people. [laughter] in the sky maybe they might. but but this is the thing like maybe if. you look at the type of people that were. capable of be like if you look at uh. Sakai Huan is a place that is in Peru. that has these insanely giant stones.

that look like they're melted into. place. Those are like the jigsaw. puzzles. Pull up Sakai Huan. If you have. a society that has the capability of. moving these 100 ton enormous blocks. that some of them are like 14 feet tall. How did [ __ ] did you do that? like see. if you can find one in perspective with. a person. >> cuz when you see it with a person. standing next to it, you really get a.

sense of like the mass and the scale. Okay, there you go. So, look at the size. of that one giant one that's there. Like, how how'd you get there? A person. that is capable that has the technology. to move something like that. Is it. absurd to think that they would have the. ability to fly? If if their entire. civilization got wiped out and this is. what remains, which is the the suppos. that's what a lot of people believe. It's not outrageous to think these. people had some ability to fly.

>> So that means you're flying above these. designs and these designs may be. landmarks. They might be able to show. you where you are. Like if you're you're. in a [ __ ]. >> Oh, yeah. You're taking off and you're. like, where do we. >> Oh, there's the spider. >> I mean, who knows what they had. >> You never know. >> It's crazy speculation, but the thing. >> it's not. >> We've only had planes for a couple. hundred years now. Not even, right? The. I think theund. >> the Wright brothers, it was the turn of. the century. >> 20s, right? Somewhere around there.

>> What year was it? >> Couple hundreds. Tough. About 100 plus. >> Yeah, it was like late 1800s, right? >> Was it 1800s? >> No. No, >> it was people could fly back then, but. like with a blimp or a balloon, but you. couldn't. A plane wasn't invented till. the Wright brothers, >> right? Was that 1920? >> 19. It was a very short amount of time. This. was the craziest number. It was a really. short amount of time. >> 1903 between Okay, so think of that. You. go from 1903. to 1969, the moon landing allegedly.

>> I don't think they went either. So, but. let's let's but at least they had. rockets and they can go into space for. sure. >> Sure. >> So, that's only 65 years. >> That's not a lot. >> That's nothing, dude. >> To go from. >> Yeah. I mean, look at the right. brother's plane. That stupid [ __ ]. plane. Who's getting on that thing? Nobody. >> You would never put your family on that. if you're on vacation. Hey kids, want to. fly? No. You have to be an [ __ ] to.

get on that thing. They went from that. to dropping an atomic bomb from one of. those things in 40 years. >> Not even. Right. >> You say 1909. Is that what you said? >> Three. >> 1903. Okay. Think of that. >> Still think of that. 42 years later, they dropped atomic bombs out of planes. >> That's nuts. >> That is pretty nuts. >> That's nuts, dude. >> That's a short amount of time. >> 42 years ago was 1984. >> Correct. >> That's how crazy it was. I was in high. school. So imagine the plane gets.

invented then and then today they drop a. [ __ ] nuclear bomb out of one. That's. bananas. >> Yeah, that's bananas. >> I wonder if we're start we're going to. like this is the beginning of. so many things revealed that it'll just. keep coming and keep coming and it'll be. over. It's just when does it stop? When. does it end? Are they going to be. overwhelmed? Are they I wish I wish we. knew exactly what they had. Can they.

move something by just using energy? Can. they Can someone just sit there like. this? Like. >> I don't know if a person can, but they. they must have had some kind of. technology that we don't understand to. move those stones. >> 100%. There's no And then what happened. to it? What happened? >> Well, if people got wiped out by a. natural disaster, nothing's left. Like. imagine if the world got wiped out and. it was just you, me, and Jamie, and a. few other people. We're not figuring out. a cell phone. No, no. We're not figuring. out electricity. >> We're not figuring out a lot of things.

>> We're not figuring out jack [ __ ] It's. going to [laughter] take many, many, many, many, many generations before any. [ __ ] autistic people figure out the. new stuff. >> Correct. We're going to have to invent vaccines. to give people autism. We're going to. have to We're going to have to figure. out Adderall. >> We got to get this kid a little bit off. so we can figure things out. Let's do. this. We got aderall. We got to make. things Someone's going to invent a. computer. >> Yes. Think about that. >> Just how long ago we were like, you got.

mail, >> right? >> You got mail. >> I got a computer for the first time in. '94 when I first moved to LA. I thought. I was living in the future. Me, too. >> I was like, this is crazy. Out of 144. baud modem. >> Yeah. Yeah. You had to use your phone. line. So, I couldn't get a phone call. while the computer was working cuz the. computer would go online. And when you. would download a page, when you go to. watch a page on the internet, go. it would slowly load.

>> Gosh, I vaguely remember that. I just. remember my first computer. >> was living in the city. I just get. Senate Liz up on a thing and same thing. I just remember taking forever to go up. and I just remember 6K was so fast like. I got 56K. >> I remember be excited when it said you. got mail. >> Yeah, it was exciting. Well, it was like. a a tiny blip in time and now all of a. sudden you've got something in your. phone that you can send a video message. to someone on the other side of the.

planet and communicate with them. instantaneously. >> and talk with no no. >> no delay. >> No delay whatsoever. No, >> I'm talking to anyone I want. >> In New Zealand, you could be con you. could have a [ __ ] iPhone call with. someone in New Zealand. >> I talk to my buddies still in Africa. >> It's nuts. >> I call him like every once a month. How. you doing? Like, Jimmy, I'm doing good. >> Crazy. >> Yes. And this has all happened inside of. our lifetime. >> Yeah. >> You remember when you used to have to. pay money for long distance? >> Yes. It was expensive. >> It was super expensive. And if you if.

you were on and never see it again back. with that John Doven uh time, I used to. have to walk because there were no even. the phones. I had to walk to the I think. it was like a McDonald's and they had a. pay phone and even there I'd have to. bring a wad of change. >> Yeah. Yeah, >> cuz like for another for the next 2. minutes 25 cents, you need another. corner. >> Or you had phone cards. You remember. those? >> Yes. Those came out those came out. later. The phone. >> came out in the '9s, right? >> Yeah. After the change. [sighs] What a.

weird time. Or you could make collect. calls. >> Would you accept a collect call from Jim. Brewer from Australia? No. >> No. >> That would cost so much money. That's. ridiculous. >> Now it costs nothing. Now it's a normal. call. for a $10 pass, Verizon will pick. this up for you. >> Those people were probably [ __ ] us. And when the cell phone company started. giving you long distance for free, then. everybody else had to give in too, >> right? >> Because when we were kids, if like if. you had a friend that lived in New. Jersey and you lived in California, that. [ __ ] was expensive to call.

>> Super expensive. >> Every you're you're on long distance. >> You get to the point. >> Yeah. >> Everything good? >> Hey, we're on long distance. >> Yeah. >> So then I told her, uh, no, I didn't say. it. And I think Shirley said it and we. were tired anyway because I had I had. been up so the dog woke me up. Well, shut the [ __ ] up and get to the point. >> Sometimes you get in an argument and. it's going to be like a $45 argument. >> Oh yeah. Or if you get off the phone. with them, >> long distance relationship with a lady. >> Yeah. You have to call her and expensive.

back there. That's expensive. >> It could be a $100 call. >> Yeah. >> I had a couple of those cuz we were. early we were just married at an early. age. I mean. >> Mhm. I I was and we'd get in battles. over the phone. I'd be more pissed. going, I'm paying like $6 every five. minutes for this [ __ ] man. >> It is. It makes you wonder like what. kind of things are we going to look back. on now in the future and go, you. remember before I AI came alive? >> You remember remember when you used to. have jobs?

>> Remember when everybody used to work? >> Which which does that freak you like. doesn't right now it doesn't. >> it freaks me out. >> bother me. Yeah, >> it freaks me out. It freaks me out. because I don't think we know what's. coming. >> We don't know what's coming and there's. nothing you could do about it. >> My friend Eric Weinstein was doing this. uh interview recently where he was like, "Whatever you do, just assume it's over. You got to be flexible. Assume whatever. you do, you have a white collar job, it's over. You're a lawyer, it's over. You're an accountant, it's over. >> It's over. That makes sense.

>> It's coming and no one has the answer. and no one knows what's going to. happen." And I think that's accurate. It's like a tidal wave. And unless. you're able to grab a tree, climb up, what you just got to that wave's going. to come. It's going to do whatever it's. going to do. And then when it starts. reciding, you just got to hope you're. still there and you're able to find. ants. And. >> I think it's going to be a little. >> a technological disaster in a lot of. ways in that it's going to cause so much. change. Just like the great flood caused. so much change.

>> I think this is going to cause so much. change. It's going to be a lot of chaos. You know what else is going to be chaos? If I don't pee real quick. >> I gota I gota pee really. Let's lock. this [ __ ] down. All right, Jim. I love. you to death, brother. Always great to. see you. Thanks for having me. >> God damn. We've been friends for a long. time. >> Yeah. Thanks for having me. You're you. you're you're uh you're a busy man. >> Brother, I love you to death. I. appreciate it. We've been friends for. like 34 years. >> That's madness. >> Isn't that crazy? >> Yeah. That's madness. >> Wow. >> That's pretty awesome. >> Wild. Uh Jim Brewer.com. >> Yeah. Yeah. On tour now.

>> On tour now. Hilarious. Go see him. [ __ ] genius standup [music] comedy. >> Thank you, brother. Thank you. Bye, everybody. [music].