Joe Rogan Experience #2312 - Jeremy Renner

Joe Rogan podcast. Check it out. The Joe. Rogan Experience. Train by day. Joe. Rogan podcast by night. All day. Well, what's happening, man? It's What's. going on? It's great to see you. Yeah. Good to be seen. Boy, what a journey you've been on. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's been I. started listening to your audio book. It. was giving me anxiety. It gets better, right? It takes a. minute, but it there there's a relief.

for the reader. Well, the relief is. seeing you healthy walking around. The. relief is also you kind of know the end. of the story, right, before you go into. it, right? So then you can really kind. of dive into the actual detailed. narrative that I I put out. There's no. other way to do it. But um but yeah, it's it's tough for a minute. It's like. I was like, "Wow, my sister, it took her. a while to read." And anybody that was. kind of involved in the incident takes a. minute, you know. Look, it took took me. a long time to kind of get through it, right? It's it's anxious for me, too. So.

So how long was the actual recovery? Because you don't even walk with a limp. You're Yeah. Yeah. It's quite There's. There's There's a lot Some things are. pretty miraculous. Some things can be. explained. Something And I tried to. figure it out as I was writing the book. You know, a lot of people ask questions. I asked myself questions. Um some things. uh were on my own will. Some things were. of other worldly of some sort. Um, but. yeah, I was given, you know, I was. supposed to walk with a limp because.

pretty much a lot of titanium and then. it was certainly not running and I'm. doing far beyond all those. things. Don't know exactly why. I can. pontificate on why and you know what do. you think of this? I think I I think. it's will is will is a really special. thing and the the the love and fuel to. to to fuel your will um I had in. spades. I I can I feel like I could. pretty much do anything if I set my mind.

to it. When it was my essential part of. my life, my recovery was a 24-hour day. job. when typically I do many many other. things right as we all do in our lives. but when all my focus like even. parenting was out the window until I can. get better so I had to do that first so. that being the central part of every. thought every fiber every cell in my. body is was geared towards a one-way. street of recovery oh I'm getting. [ __ ]. better so I just got better and there's.

no what's the alternative you know I was. I was brought back somehow someway. and it would be a disservice to not do. all the things I'm supposed to be doing. and want to be doing. So, it just took a. lot of effort and it took a lot of. support to heck, dude. I mean, there's. hundreds of people involved in helping. me not die again, you know, but then it. was but at the end of the day, the.

recovery, as you know, you've been. everybody's been injured in some sort of. way. It's it's a lonely road. It's your. it's only you. No matter how much help. you have or PT you have, if you your. tendons go or whatever the heck happens, you still have to put in the work every. day and endure the the pain and manage. the pain and mitigate it. And um it's it. can be quite lonely. But I I always. found that the my my my daughter and my. family as I see their faces when I get. better, I could stand up, let's say, or. not pee in a jar. I could get in a.

wheelchair and go any sort of milestone. I'd see their faces get a little bit. less horrified, even relieved, even. quite joyful even. So, uh, as much. damage as I did to my family and their. their their hearts, um, me getting. better can, um, can relieve them of that. burden. So, it was an easy one-way road. to recover. And that's why I recovered. fast and I I attribute it to my love for. my family. Wow. So, let's bring it back. to the day of the accident. What when.

exactly was it? It was New Year's Day. New Year's Day. New Year's Day 2023. Yeah. And I. host my family at my house up there. Uh. like 25 people every post Christmas to. New Year's all the time. Family, friends, whoever. Um just kind of come. up and we can celebrate the the holidays. together, go skiing, all these type of. things. But we had a big kind of. snowageddon type snow event that you. know shut down the mountain that I live. on at the top of uh Lake Tahoe at about.

8,000 feet elevation and we got just. tons and tons of snow but it happens. often. Maybe not that intense of a storm. but so much so where we were cut off. from anywhere else we're snowed in. Fine. I'm prepared for that stuff. Um 3. days without power prepared for it. It's. fine. We can have fun. It's actually. relief. All the cell phones go off. all. the iPads go away and computers and. everybody's just playing card games with. headlamps on and I mean it's a riot so. we had a good time you know food supply.

was still good but you know it's you. know it's New Year's Day and we're. getting a break in the weather so I. decided need to clear the roads and see. come out for air essentially and um and. in doing so that's when the the accident. sort of transpired and it's not it's. more of a routine type of thing to have. a half a mile long driveway up there and. I have to maintain it myself so I have a. snowcat and a bunch of other snow. removal type. equipment. There's a bunch of vehicles, snowmobiles, even things that got stuck. in the driveway because it it was a lot. of extra snow and it was very some of it.

was very light and then it got very icy. and hard. So, you're sinking down like. three or four feet into it and it was a. hot mess. So, had to try to dig all that. stuff out using the snowcat pulling this. stuff out. This thing of snowcat to. describe it in words is pretty. difficult, but it's like a tank. Um, it's probably I don't know 12 feet wide. the tracks on each side. So it so it. spins like a tank like a skid steer. There it is. Yeah, there we go. Some. that's that's that's a small tiny. version of one. Um, but yeah, it's. something kind of out of Star Wars, you.

know, but this minor or metal track is. more like that one right there. Oh, you. got one like that. That's it. That's. exactly like the one I have. So it's. about like 16,000 lbs or so. And it's. it's very nimble on the snow. On the. snow. just to see it physically. Put it back. up. To see it physically and to know. that that's what ran over your leg. Oh. my whole body. Oh god. Yeah. It was uh. So you have to step on the tracks, you. see, to get into the cab to operate it.

So stepping on the tracks is is a normal. thing to do. You just don't do it while. the thing's you're operating it, right? You on the thing, you drive it and it's. just easy. the thumb go forward, reverse, and you're neutral and that's. it. It's really easy to operate. Um, but. it was just the the accident happened. because you have to get in and out on. the off on those tracks and I hit the. the thumb thing and uh it threw me off. and it was going towards my nephew. So, I had to jump back on and try to stop it. from killing him because it was going to. crush him between the truck and the and. that big blade that I have. But you see.

that thing? Yeah. It's a few thousand. pounds. That thing's gnarly. But so my. instinct was to jump back on it and try. to stop it. Um you know obviously it. didn't work out and it got ran over and. uh there you go. What how much of your. body did it run over? The entire all of. it. Oh my god. I was cuz I went if I the. tracks were here to jump in the cab. I. leap leapt up and over to try to grab. onto it and got sucked under the whole. thing. So the So the whole length of it. just kind of So there's like a set of.

wheels that turn these tracks. you see. and there's like six wheels so it so it. undulates. So I felt all the undulate. The first one was the worst like the. pressure and skull crush and all that. stuff and then it releases cuz then the. undulation of the tire and the the track. and you're awake for that just like like. by the six undulation just like all. right just kind of finish already and. you're just. like most like you know you're like. you're drowning and being struck by. lightning and bleeding out all the.

things all at once man. It's like a. immense pressure and immovable object. and you know my skull kind of lost out. but still survived and um your skull got. run over. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's like it. was like you know Yeah. It's everything. It's like it's 38 broken bones and. eyeballs out. Oh my god. And it's uh. shout out to medical science. I know. right. I mean, and yeah, I mean, all the.

doctors were like, "Dude, I don't know. how your eyes still operating or still. working, but I think because I was on. ice because I did see it." I'm like, "Well, maybe I'm going to put this eye. on ice." And just kind of rolled into. it cuz I saw my eye with my other eye, right? And I'm like, "I'm going to be. able to keep that thing." Because I'm on. like an icy asphalt driveway that's off. of my driveway, right? The top of the. road. So, which wasn't really great for. impact getting ran over. I wish I was on. a snow pack. could have been maybe a. little bit easier. It would push me into. snow, right? But it wasn't. So, I just.

kind of rolled onto it just like maybe I. could kind of put the eye on ice until I. could figure out how to breathe. Oh my. god. You I have to sort of laugh at it. because it's weird to sort of think. about that, you know? Wow. 38 bones. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it was like the ri a. lot of ribs and all my my spiral. fracture and my legs. All my joints were. broken. All my my ankles, my knees, my. none of my spine and I only got a.

laceration of my liver from like one of. the ribs breaking in a couple spots and. it went down and kind of stabbed it, but. it didn't really mess it up too bad. So, that's okay. But all my organs, my. brain, I don't think there's any brain. damage. I'll use an excuse later, I guess. Uh, you know, uh, yeah. And my spine that. that's the miracle. It's like, how did I. break 14 ribs, right? And my crack my.

skull and every arm and leg and finger. and thing. But my spine was spared. Oh. my god. And and all my organs were. spared. My brain. And so like it's kind. of almost no harm, no foul at the end of. the day, even though there's, you know, probably 20% titanium in my body at this. point. it. So, how many pieces of. titanium are in you? Well, the guy that. invented this procedure worked at the. hospital in Reno because there's a lot. of crushing injuries that happen because. all the ski resorts and mines that are. in the area. So, I got really lucky to.

get this doctor. Uh, but it took four. doctors to get to this guy. So, so says. my family. I was out in a coma and but. they once they found this guy who was on. vacation, um, the mayor of Reno actually. called him said, "You got to get back. and help my friend out." And so he. rushed out and he's just like, "This is. what he does for a living." He's like, "Oh, this is easy. I can't wait to do. this for this guy." You know, so. relieved on my family. There was such. relief because they were like, "Oh, he's. going to lose his eye. We're going to. cut off his leg." I mean, all this kind. of tragic sort of prognosis, whatever.

you want to call it, right? So this guy. comes in. No, no, it's fine. We're going. to hammer this thing in. We're going to. do this, do his face plate, do the. thing. We're going to do this. And just. lucky that the orbital bone that broke. and the cheekbone that broke, they only. wanted to do that because um because my. face as as an actor made me want to save. my cheekbone, I guess I not that I cared. about it, but um but yeah, he fixed up. my my all my ribs and they used like. like this mesh and this he has this sort. of weird way to kind of handle if you. fix one or two of the ribs that are all.

broken, the rest will kind of fall into. place. The bone the body's pretty. miraculous. just give it a little. direction and then it heals on itself. and it'll grow the bone. So, um it's not. as much titanium in my ribs as one might. think for all those breaks. It's. only, you know, maybe it's it looks like. rebar, right? You get a scan like my a. lot of my body's like Do you have a an. X-ray of your It's somewhere. Yeah. Yeah. Somewhere. Is it online anywhere? Well, we could see it. I don't know. Do. you have it on your phone or anything?

No, I don't think so. I could I could. ask my sister for it. She's got showing. everybody that thing. It's it's it's pretty it's pretty um. remedial looking, you know. It looks. like, you know, like I had a hammer and. a 2x4 and some nails. And that's what. this looks like. It looks very like is. why is there a nail and two screws? And. you know, it's uh it's carpentry 101. You know, there's nothing like, you. know, I think the guy that cuz I had. like screws in my skull and my my jaw.

cuz that broke in three spots. Oh, and. the guy took it out with something that. he got from Home Depot. They literally. it's like a some, you know, just he just. took it out. I'm like, dude, it's. squeaking like it's in wood. He numb it. or. something. I almost knocked this guy. out. It's just. like it was unbelievable. Unbelievable. And I was always I was. always kind of half in the the bag. mentally just kind of because it takes. so.

much mental um to deal with like pain. management and uh it's emotionally. exhausting to deal with like so many. different things in your body. So I'm. always kind of half paying attention to. things. you know, my it's I'm much. sharper mentally now because I don't. have to mitigate so much inflammation, pain, and all that all the time. So, I. can kind of be here and laugh with you. But back then when this guy was I I.

almost talked this guy so hard, dude. Um. but uh yeah, glad that was I was really. happy to um that was a great milestone. for me to get these screws out of my. skull. Jesus. But um that was uh that. was worse than getting ran over by the. snowcat dude. Really? Yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. In terms of pain or just. discomfort? No, it it wasn't so much the. pain. It's the haunting images of. feeling my. um gums wrap around this screw as he's.

and it's pulling out. It's a lot longer. than I thought it was and then there's. three more to go. It was more the the. visual is in my mind um kind of what. makes it terrible. You know, the visual. because I'm a pretty visual guy. And so. I don't think anything um hurts me so. much in a physical way, but the visual. is a pretty haunting image. Wow. And the. sounds, dude, it vibrates your skull as. he's taking it out. And it's.

like this is what horror films are made. of, right? It's just like saw or. something. Is that the only thing that. they had to take out is the screws that. are in your head or did they take them. out of your body? No. No. You have to. leave those in for the most part because. why risk infection and open you up to. for something. But. um yeah. So all that all the rest of the. stuff stays in until those screws come. loose. At some point they will they. start backing out, right? Yeah. Yeah. You think you'd put in a locking screw,

right? I've had friends that have had. broken arms and starts poking out of the. bar. Yeah. Yeah. And they have to get. another operation and get it removed. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So, how many different. plates do you have? I I think I got. there's only a couple in my face and. they went in like underneath my cheek. A. plate for my uh orbital socket and then. for the cheekbone. They put I think a. plate or two over there to hold that. bone in place. Do you feel it? Um I I.

feel the the lack of um feeling in it. It's still still numbness to that this. whole side because they had to cut all. these nerve endings right to get in. through your mouth. So even the side of. my um face is little slightly little. little numbish. And the rest of them do you feel like. how much do you feel in all your. different bones and joints and all the. different things that got repaired? Yeah. Yeah. That's that's there's lots.

of scar tissue to work through all the. time. Um, it's what's great is like it's. not any one spot. It's like it it moves. around, you know, even if you're not. injured, it's like if you just twist. your leg wrong and then it it goes up. into your hip and then it's in your. shoulder. It moves around your body kind. of it moves it around. So, you just got. to stay on top of it and there's always. something to to work through, you know, in your body, you know, and it's just. look, I already have to do it anyway. I'm 54. I'm going to have to take take. care of my health and I just have to.

make it a very central part of my life. And so now, do you have full range of. motion, full mobility, everything is. back to normal? Yeah. I don't know what. normal is. You know, uh I'm going to be, you know, I feel. like I'm maybe 110%. Just because. spiritually, mentally, um I'm so much. better. I got so many gifts from dying. and coming back that Yeah. I'm 150%. My. body will always be, look, my body's. aging, so I have to fight against age.

Well, recovery is age reversing. It's. the same same stuff that people are. doing just to reverse age. I just do it. just because it's my recovery and I have. to for the rest of my life just to. prevent inflammation and discomfort and. swelling, things like that. So, when you. have so many broken bones and so many. broken joints, what is the recovery. like? Like, how did they even get you. moving again? Day by day. Day by day. Yeah. Instantly. As soon as I got home. from the hospital,

um, yeah, PT there and working to just. move, keep things moving. You have to. otherwise you lose it. You lock up or. you lose. Seeing you walk around today. in the studio, I would have no idea. Yeah. You look totally normal. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's great. It's It's takes. a lot of work and it's still working. Look, I was having to stretch in your. studio, you know. I have to have to I. have to move quite a bit so I don't lock. up after after a good night's sleep. It's like you could be a little stiff in.

the morning and I have to do some. stretches and things like that, but I. think if I didn't get in the accident, I'm 54, I'd probably have to do it. anyway, right? So, um, feels good to have to force the. stretching. I think AG1 has been a. longtime partner of the show and I'm. excited to share a great offer they have. going on right now. You can get a free. month supply of AG1's Omega-3 supplement. and a free bottle of D3 K2 with your. first subscription order. The Omega3.

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So you're completely bedridden initially. and how long does it take before you can. sit up? I. don't I don't know. It's pretty it moved. pretty quick the the randomly with the. punctured lung and the all this broke. the shoulder collarbone dislocation all. this stuff that healed pretty quickly. but that doesn't require gravity and. force on your legs like your legs have. to take. Right. So those that took a.

little bit longer and the legs both. ankles right that's those are under. trauma and and plates in those. um you know this is all a pipe. essentially piece of rebar my my whole. lower leg so that took a little bit. longer but the the ribs ironically it. was only painful for I feel like a. couple weeks I also had these like. plastic suitcases for my lungs cuz they. had to let it bleed out and this stuff. was going in I don't know what goop was. in that thing but I had to carry those. things around for a while but once I got. rid of I was kind of sitting up a bit.

more and um I felt good once I was kind. of sitting up but there's still as you. can imagine so much trauma so many. places but I think the longest it was. was really getting up to to stand up to. walk to get all your joints to work. properly again to relearn to walk. relearn to move because you really kind. of have to a lot of atrophy as you can. imagine that happens but I was standing. up um and moving. around uh I got into a chair probably,

you know, by the by by February after. like 3 weeks. Wow. And um the more I can. move, the faster you heal. You're. getting more blood flow. You're getting. you're getting your body to work better. Um help with my my attitude uh and will. to get out and sit up. You all the. things each of these things are like. milestones and I would just like Yeah. And then move forward to the next thing. and set a goal for myself. even if it. was just like to sit up and like turn or. I didn't have to set such big to reach.

too far to keep my confidence high. So. because I keep reaching these goals and. just kept going and going and going and. I I'd find myself again it's 24 hours a. day so what do I have to do today? Well. I don't even have to ask. I just got to. get better and you know it just kept. going and with whatever thing and. there's so many things to attack to get. better. It's like I never got bored. I. always had all these bands and stuff. I. was in I remember being in a wheelchair. and I'd wrap it around like this desk. and I'd be in as like a leg press, you. know, all these like interesting ways. just like to try to strengthen my my my.

body and get better. Whatever wasn't, you know, I anything that would work, I. would do it. Wow. I say no to nothing. Say yes to everything and let's try it. Let's do it. Took took in everything. Took in everything. You know, they say. that is one of the more difficult things. with stroke victims is the will to do. the exercises to force yourself to. recover. Yeah. Because so many people. just they they've never done that. before. They've never pushed themselves.

before. They don't and they there's this. tendency to just kind of give up. Some. people have. Yeah. Yeah. That's it's. part of the reason why I wrote the book. is maybe people because it's a lonely. place when where people are struggling. in in recovery and when it's a lifetime. recovery too, you know. Um I hope they. can find something they can grab on to. like if this guy can get overcome this, I can get out of my own way here and. maybe not maybe think of it a little. differently. The only thing we have. control of ever in life in perpetuity is.

our perspective. So, you know what's my I could easily. just go be victimized and, you know, cry. about it and like, oh, my career is over. and die. I mean, it's not it's not even. part of the narrative. It's part of it's. not even in the conversation. It's like, I'm getting better every day for the. rest of my life. That's it. Wow. There's. only one way to go. What's the. alternative, Joe? Right. What is the. alternative? I kept I keep saying that. to my What's the alternative? I'm not. going to stumble around through life, right? I wasn't brought back here just.

just to suffer. That's not happening. I'd say unplug the machine. I'm done. I'm out of here. It's way better being. dead. You know what I mean? I'm not. going to come back and and and just. waddle my and limp my way through life. It's not going to happen. What's crazy. is you if you didn't approach it like. that, you probably wouldn't be able to. walk. Correct. Correct. Yeah. Because. there have been a lot of people that. have been gravely injured that never. come back. Yeah. Yeah. You have to push. it, right? Anything that's in your life. for excellence, you have to obsess at it.

and risk everything for it. You have to. or it's not going to happen. No one's. going to do it for you. But what else. are you going to do? Yeah. You know what. I mean? Again, like I said, what's the. alternative? Yeah, this sucks, but like. so does a cold plunge and so does this. and so does that and so does that. You. got to really test. We got to test our. bodies, our limits to really have real. growth. And especially in recovery, you. have to What else you going to do, man? you're going to take pills, right? That. was one, again, one of the harder things. worse than the accident as well is. getting off Oxycottton and I got off.

pretty quickly. Like that's gnarly. stuff, man. I'm glad it's it was there. for, you know, the pain for me, but like. I wanted to get off it as soon as. possible. So, because it's highly highly. addictive and coming off that stuff was. gnarly. It's so hard. And you have a. really strong will and some people. don't. They put all people on that. stuff. That's crazy, dude. Is really. Ironically, I was supposed to be doing a. a uh a movie about the Sakra family.

Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That but it was. supposed to happen like literally that. that April or just that that spring. Um. obviously that got cancelled because I. had to take Oxycottton to kind of get. by, but then I had to get off that stuff. real quick. You know, it was really. interesting too how people treated that. drug. You know, everyone like was. monitoring, counting the pills, if it. was a half a thing or this or that. Like. everyone was on it. Like, dude, why? You. treat me like some some sort of drug.

add. Don't give me this stuff. I don't. want it. Jesus Christ, it's terrible. Wow. But it's a pretty powerful powerful. stuff. And I don't I don't ever blame. sort of the drug. I just think sort of. how maybe it's it's free to use and it's. it's even supported in school systems. and, you know, they got that family kind. of got away with a lot of stuff to. promote that stuff to put it mildly. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's a whole. another You've seen Peter Berg's uh. thing on Netflix, Painkiller? Have you. seen that? It's a docu drama. documentary.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Matthew Broad. Yep. Yep. It's gnarly, man. Gnarly. Yeah. That's an evil family. What they. did to people and and just support the. idea that, you know, hey, this you could. just be on this and you don't have any. pain. Don't worry about it. And it's not. even addictive. Yeah. Just Yeah. It's. the knowing. It's the knowing part and. then then double downing and then. selling it getting it really getting it. out there. It's and promoting it as a. thing that you could be on forever. Yeah. Which is just insane. Yeah. So.

you're on it and how long did you have. to be on it for? I again always working. to to get off of it. And I think. maybe it was around because I got home. on. January 13th, Friday the. 13th. And I think it was probably less. than a month, probably like beginning of. February because I had all my mers and. stuff got pushed in. So my mouth's a hot. mess, my jaw's broken, and but I'd have.

night tears as you would. um being awake. through that trauma. So, and I bit down. and the tooth was in just in a certain. spot and just cracked my moler and and. it goes down to the nerve and that I'm. like, "Oh, I feel that pain, but I'm on. all this oxycottton. I don't feel maybe. I don't need to be on that shit." So, I. had to go get that emergency extraction. and get a post put in and on my back. mer. I said, "Well, I'm going to I'll. take it one more time just for the tooth.

pain or whatever even what the dentist. gave me." I think I took the dentist. stuff, whatever that was, and cold. turkey off Oxycottton and Gabby Penton. Cold turkey? Yeah. I didn't know. You didn't know how hard it would be. Oh, no. I was just so. adamant. I don't really listen the. doctors. I don't listen to the doctors, man. Uh, you know. So, yeah. So, I. started crying um for about three and a. half days straight. Uh, even during my.

PT, I'm just like, not that I'm even. sad, but like full crocodile tears. Just. tears. Tears. Wow. 24 hours a day, right? Just going. I couldn't stop. crying. And I was shivering. Um, so this. is all just withdrawal. Withdrawal. Yeah. I wasn't thinking that anything. other than like why am I crying? I I. didn't know it was withdrawal even. though because my mind's not there. I'm. in my mind's in recovery and getting off. this stuff and focusing on holding my.

body up. It it takes just a lot of. mental acuity to to just exist, right? So, I wasn't thinking that. Yeah, of. course. I look back on I was like, of. course, I'm coming off [ __ ] heroin. essentially, right? So, yeah. And then and so I I I. call my sister and thing. I'm like, I. don't know why I'm crying. I can't stop. crying. He said, "Well, let's call the. had these different doctors that we'd. zoom call with when I was at home." And. so we called up the the pain management. doctor and she's like, "Look," is I told. him, he's like, "What are you doing? You. got to taper off that like takes like.

two weeks at least. You can't just cold. turkey. It's no wonder you're feeling. all cold and all this stuff because. that's all nerve stuff." So, I just. started feeling gravity. I started. feeling temperature. I started feeling. everything. It was like on fire, right? So, um, why did you make the decision to. go cold turkey? Because I didn't want I. didn't I don't like the feeling of being. on pain meds. I don't like, you know, I. want to have my mind. I mean, I was. always using the humor to find my. sobriety. If I could land a joke, it.

means I'm reading the room and I'm. hitting the timing right, whatever it. is, you know, right? So, I I wanted my I. needed my mind. If I need my wit, I. needed my will to to recover. I needed. sleep and I needed my brain. And the. drugs kind of numb my brain as they. would, right? As they numb your whole. body. So, I just wanted off of them. And. I don't like how I feel. You feel muddy. Yeah. And I just didn't like the. feeling. So, you know, it came with a. price, but I got the okay to like take a.

little fiber of Oxy to to sleep on if. you needed to mitigate some pain just so. I could sleep. Like, okay, maybe I'll do. that if it happens. And I did once or. twice or three times maybe after that. moment. But I got through it and I got. off it. But I got off it because I. cracked that tooth. And that I felt pain. like that is like that's not going to. let me sleep at all. It's a heartbeat in. my brain. My face is just like. throbbing, right? As you would for. anybody. So I said like, "Oh, that's. then I don't need to take the pain. meds." So like that was my excuse to get.

off the pain meds, right? Because you're. feeling pain and you're on the pain. meds. Yeah. I would have been on that. [ __ ] much longer if I didn't crack that. tooth. Wow. Cuz I wouldn't have the will. to say like, "Oh, let's get off this. stuff, right?" But it took that I'm. like, "Okay, well, I don't need it." I. had knee surgery in 93 and they gave me. something. I don't It was either Percoet. or Vicodin. I don't remember what it. was. And I took it one time and I felt. so bad. I felt so stupid. Yeah. I. remember being in my apartment in New.

York just feeling so dumb and just. thinking, I'd rather be in pain. Yeah. And so one day I took it one day and I'm. like, "That's it. I'm done." Yeah. And. then I sold it. I sold my uh my pills to. this guy Jeff at the pool hall. It's a. dirt bag. He was this dirt bag guy that. I used to hang out with at the pool. hall. He had a bandana and long hair. He. was a hippie. He always sold drugs and I. sold him to him. He's like, "I'll take it. What do you. got?" Yeah. Yeah. What do you got? And. uh then I had surgery again. I've had a.

bunch of different surgeries for. jiu-jitsu injuries and martial arts. injuries. But the second time I had. surgery on my knee. I had a knee. reconstruction again on my other knee in. 2003 and I didn't dig anything. I'm just. I just like I don't want nothing. I'm. just going to just deal with it and it. was okay. Yeah. Maybe anti-inflammatory. or something. Then it's it's really I. didn't even take that stuff because I. don't think that's good for you either. Yeah. Yeah. You know, I mean, it's. you're gonna be in pain no matter what.

It's just going to dull it a little bit. I'd rather feel it all just get cut. I. agree. Accustomed to deal with it. Yeah. That was like back when I even when I. had my wisdom teeth pulled out when I. was like 20 or something, you know, that's pretty gnarly surgery, right? And. they give you like a was a codine or. something, you know? I just puked on. that and said, "No way." Took one pill. and I never took didn't sell it to. anybody. Isn't it astonishing that some. people like it? Yeah. People party on it. and they'll go drink it like too Viking.

and all that stuff. I just It's just the. opposite for me. I just can't. It's just. my body doesn't agree with it. Yeah. Uh. I just uh and I'm glad I don't I don't. like it. You know, I had a friend of. mine who's a musician and he would write. all his music on on Vikings and I was. like, what? How do you do that, man? Like I took it whatever it was that I. took. I can't remember which one it was, but I felt like a [ __ ] I just felt. like I had like 20% of my brain and it. was just this dull like wet cotton.

stuffed in my head. Yeah. But I mean I. guess maybe it's just like different. biology. Maybe different people react to. it differently. For sure. Yeah. It. wasn't for me. Yeah, I agree. So, how. long did it take for the withdrawal to. subside? By the time I got to the uh the that. zoom with the the pain management. doctor, he he said like, "Well, don't do. that. You should taper off." Like, "Well, I'm already o off it now." I'm. like, "I'm I've come off the the.

decrying train." Um especially because. he also made sense of it for me. He's. like, so I was coming, it's like, it's. like day four by the time I talked to. him. And um it just helped me make sense. of like why I was feeling the way I was. feeling cuz it it felt like a setback, right? You know, and because there are. setbacks in recovery, but this felt like. a real setback like I like I I couldn't. grab of why. And I'm pretty in tune with. like my body and my emotions and my. everything. And I just couldn't grab why. I was when it's so obvious.

Yeah, but then, you know, I don't I'm. not the one really administering this. stuff. My mom's just giving me the pill. and doing peptide injections for me and, you know, rebirthing me, you know, taking care of me. So, what peptides. were you on? Oh, man. If I look back, I. don't know. I was getting three three um. MLS, those three loads, and they're all. mixed up. So, as you would. um uh probably say a lot of the same. ones that I'm on now that I continue and. I rotate in and out of different ones.

for. PPC700. Yeah. All those. Yeah. Yeah. AODD and Matsi and uh I had to do a lot. of blood work. Got my hemoglobin was at. two. Whoa. Yeah. That was what it was. going back to work back to Mayor. Kingtown. Crazy. Yeah. Uh it's like the. blood of a dead man essentially. I just. got no energy. So then I started really. working with. um all my blood panels, big giant wide. 16 vial blood panels. And that started.

to be my new course of recovery of of a. cellular way in a blood way. And that's. where I really started to get strong. I. was moving around. I was mobile. All the. bones are healed. By this time, it's. like a year's gone by. But now I started. working on cellular and blood health. And that's when I that's when I got to. like my skin started to look great and. you know cuz your blood is tells you. what your body's producing and not. producing, right? So that was a great. report card or barometer of where I was.

at, why I'm not, you know, where my. mitochondrial levels are at, anything. was at. So um it was really really great. part of my recovery and that's what I'll. continue to do and still continue to do. today. Boxing's biggest weekend is here. and DraftKings Sportsbook is bringing. the heat. It all kicks off Friday in. Time Square as Ryan Garcia, Devin Haney, and Tapimo Lopez light up New York City. Then on Saturday, The King returns. Canelo Alvarez is back on Don.

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over. Agent eligibility varies by. jurisdiction. Void in Ontario. New. customers only. Bonus bets expire 168. hours after issuance. For additional. terms and responsible gaming resources, see dkg.co/audio. Did you use a hyperbaric chamber? Oh. yeah, that that must have helped a lot. Yeah. What it did for me, it's not. something I don't think there's many. things in my recovery that you do that. feel good. It just doesn't make you feel. as shitty, right? Right. It's like. you're building a mountain one layer of.

pain at a time. Yeah. So, but hyperbaric. is great. It's it helps with lactic acid. when you're working out. It's, you know, it's all the oxygen you you put in your. body is is a great necessity. It's a. again another one of those things that. are even age reversing. It's also. disease preventative. It's amazing this. thing. And it's I got one that was um. you can sit in and do multiple things. I. can not just I can't just sit there for. an hour and a half in in the chamber and. like I'll go crazy. Uh I have a busy. brain, you know, and uh so I get a.

computer, whatever, email, whatever I. can do is a to kind of continue to do it. to make it a part of my life. Oh, that's. cool. Yeah. And then I go into like a a. red light bed, a high powered red light. infrared bed. Then it moves all that. oxygen through my body even more so and. gets deeper into the tissue. It's. amazing. Yeah. I use both of those. things. Yeah. Those are parts of my. life. Yeah. Yeah. But I would imagine. for something like what you went. through, it's imperative. Yeah. Yeah. For tissue recovery and Oh man, huge. huge huge faster for repair. And so from. So a year later, you're walking around.

Yeah. For Yeah. By I was walking by my. daughter's birthday was March 28th. So I. guess a few months later I was walking. but there was assisted very assisted. week walking with cane or a walker. Um. so that had to be amazing. Yeah. Yeah. And then I was by by the summertime I. stopped doing recovery the intense. 24-hour day recovery. I would do like a. 12-h hour day recovery and then go walk. in the sand in Lake Tahoe. Lake Tahoe is.

a big world's biggest cold plunge. It's. a freezing ass lake. So I just go dip my. legs in that lake, walk in the sand. It's great for instability in your. ankles, your joints, your hips. And I. would just do that kind of stuff. Even. ride a jet ski. I was riding a jet ski. in June. Wow. Yeah. Taking it easy. I'm. not doing anything nuts, but just like. just living life. You know how good that. is for your mental acuity, your your. spirit, your emotional body, and all. that stuff. So, I was out in the. sunshine getting vitamin D. I was in, you know, nature. I was with friends. I. could do life stuff like I'm back in.

life stuff, you know. Now that's a great. confidence builder. Yeah. So I kept. trying to do those things and then of. course I have to go back into all the. recovery stuff and you know that I. always do but. just happy I can do it. What does the. cold water feel like with like I mean. you have a rod through your your tibia. Yeah. The cold water is it's that's not. the issue. It's when it's cold weather. Yeah. Like like anybody it's your. stiffer. Your your blood slows and all.

that stuff. So it doesn't help us. I. need circulation in my joints. Tendons. don't get a lot of blood flow. I really. got to work at getting blood flow in. these joints otherwise they'll stiffen. and I'm just slower going. It's. everything just feels a little bit more. robotic. What did they have? But I think. that's and before injury it's that for. anybody, right? Also elevation. I mean. 8,000 feet elevation in Tahoe. So all. those things aren't really kind of. helping to my recovery, but my body will. respond in those oxygen depleted.

environments and all that stuff. So. maybe it did help, maybe it didn't. I. don't know. But I did most of my initial. recovery in LA and then when I could, I. got out to Tahoe to be in my sort of. happy place in in nature. Did they have. to reconstruct your knees? Did you No. No. None of that. They they they was. cracks in my ankles and my foot spun. around a handful of times. It was spiral. fracture in my my leg. So they had to. hit a rod down into my knee and they had. to screw it screw it you know with.

plates and all that stuff. So I didn't. ensure I just move those things. So I. don't know there's not wasn't full like. reconstruction like people get a new. knee or a new hip. It was just a lot of. breaks. My pelvic broke broke in three. spots. My hips all you know but you. don't fix that. Even they even said you. broke your [ __ ] I'm like that is. that what you say as a doctor? Is that. how you say it? Come on. That's I think there's another word for. it.

I think he was trying to make me laugh. and I. did. And Eric makes you laugh. He's. like, "You broke everything, Jeremy. You. even broke your ass." I'm like, "All. right, that's great." Wow. Wow. And so. so you've you've gone through the. 12-hour now you're in like this 12-h. hour day. Yeah. Summer at summertime. Yeah. So I got to do. like just life stuff and that was that. was that was really my first shot.

at allowing myself to think that there's. a future and I'm not going to live a. life of full-time recovery for the rest. of my life. like, "Oh, I can actually go. do it some other things that I enjoy. doing with people in kind of a normal. way." So, I was without a cane, without. anything by the time by June and summer. came around. So, I'm I'm moving around. That's pretty. I'm moving around with. with, you know, inflammation and getting. downstairs very slowly. But as you would. like, as long as you're patient, as I. was, as aggressive I was with my.

recovery, I allowed patients to also. live within that aggressive attack on. each joint or each inflammation or. whatever it was. I do allow patience and. because I allow myself to push hard. hard. I listen to my body. Body says, "Fuck off." I'm like, "All right, I'll. chill out for a second and then, you. know, keep going." So, but I was I got. to live life and and that was so so. rewarding. to my spirit and my my my confidence. which you know you need in that in that.

kind of those kind of dire times and and. I keep going and then like I said when. we got to back getting back to work. because I got so. ready maybe I'm down to like four hours. a day of recovery by the end of that. first year I'm like I'm going to go back. to work. I need to get back out into the. world and use life as as my recovery and. still only spend four hours a day on. hyperbaric chamber, red light, whatever. the heck I could do to I mix it all up. It's a bunch of different stuff. A lot. of heat, a lot of vibration, power plate.

stuff. That was really great for numbing. the the nerve endings, my back of my. knees, back of my um ankles, that kind. of stuff. I don't know if you ever used. that stuff for No. Like what are you. what are you doing? I used to have this. thing, God, what was it called? It was a. thing you stand on it. It's like it. would shake you different vibrations. Yeah. Yeah. And it would slow it down then make it. fast. It's like that. Yeah. And that. really was great for numbing like the. back of my knees that really still ache. and back of my ankles just so it's not.

quite so sensitive. I don't know if it floods the the nerve. endings with blood or whatever the heck. it does, but it just kind of numbs it. out and I can go to sleep on. It's. great. It's beautiful. I used to have. one of those at my house in LA. I don't. even remember what it's called now. It. was just some machine. It had a bunch of. different programs. Yeah. Yeah. It's. power plate. It's probably a power. plate. Well, power plate, I think, is. the one that you work out on. You can. Yeah. Yeah. This one was a little. different. This one was just It would. just shake you at a bunch of different. frequencies. Oh, interesting. You would. stand on it and it was supposed to just.

do a bunch of stuff for your your. hormones and endocrine system and all. sorts of different stuff just by the. vibration. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It helps me. a lot. Interesting. For sure. And um Oh, you doing sauna and stuff like that as. well. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But I use I. usually use just the red light bed like. you sweat like it's shaped like a like a. coffin or like like channing bed one. Yeah. Know it's just as effective I. think as a you go to the sauna. It just.

doesn't take too long to heat up or. anything. Just get in that thing and. cook. It's amazing. And you it's amazing. that even like an LED light like that or. infrared light could could warm you up. so much. But it's intense. I love it. And then after a while, do you start. lifting weights? Yeah. Yeah. I started I. started training um as soon as I got the. when I started doing blood work because. my hormone my my testosterone was at. 200, my hemoglobin was at two. Everything was your body's just wrecked. Oh, it's wrecked. And I'm going back to.

work. So, I had to attack why I was. falling asleep during workouts that I'm. trying to do or whatever. I'm trying. they they only schedule me maybe six. hours a day on set because, you know, I. fall asleep in the middle of a scene. Oh. my god. They're like, "Who's going to. wake that [ __ ] up?". Wow. Oh, man. So, yeah. So, I had to. really work on that. And once I got once. it really I think it was really the. testosterone once I got that level to. like 700 800 constantly then I had more.

energy and that allowed me more energy. in the gym and once I had that that got. me more energy that that so just started. feeding upon itself. I was doing blood. blood panels every. week and I just saw progress, progress, progress and then I just started lifting. and I had so much energy and I felt. better the more I lifted and moved and. stretched and I just get it just kept. compiling just like most things in life. and it got easier like most things um. with oxygen chamber that's better when. you compile on it. Same with red light. stuff. Nothing nothing no one time at.

anything is going to do anything. But if. you do it often enough and make it a. central part of your life, it's like, "Oh, I was on fire. It was great. I. started running." And you can run now. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. For distance. Yeah. I mean, I don't know how where I'm. running to. I was never a distance guy. I was always a sprinter, right? I was a. sprinter from high school and college. and. um um Yeah. So, does it hurt when you. run? It it feels. like if you're. If you have a, you know, if you ever. been in a car, you're on the freeway and.

it has a misalignment or it's a little. shaky. Yeah. Or you got a flat tire. It. feels like I got four flat tires when. I'm running. It looks great. It looks. like, oh, this guy's no problem with. this guy. Just boop boop boop boop boop. And it feels like the wheels are going. to fall off. Wow. Mentally or something. It just it just feels like it's because. there's like it's it's it's a lot of. pressure to put on all these joints, right? Um, I haven't sprinted really much in a. while. I haven't really worked on that. I've been working on other things, you.

know, blood and cells and that kind of. stuff. So, I mean, sprinting is not, you. know, what am I doing? What am I going. to do? Sprint 54 for God's sakes. You. know, maybe like for, you know, like cuz. because you do stunts and movies and. maybe at some point I'll have to sprint. I don't know. Or maybe not. Maybe just. don't do that [ __ ] you know? Yeah. Well, maybe you can though. I mean, sure. I can. I think you can. I already have. I believe it. I just don't know if I. want to make that a central part of, you.

know, the acting experience. Maybe I I. Well, that would be an absolutely. phenomenal turnaround to go from where. you were to going back to action films. Yeah. Yeah. To go play Hawkeye or. something. That's what I'm saying. Yeah. That' be that'd be a good born identity. Yeah. That's that's tough. That would be. a tough one. That would that's I was in. excellent shape for that one. That would. be a challenge. Yeah, I would imagine. I don't know. Do I want to tax my body? I don't know. Probably should. Is it. taxing your body or is it strengthening. your body? The question. I don't know.

Yeah, I don't know. I mean, how many how. many miles can you get on this stuff, right? Titanium. I think it's forever. I. think it's permanent. I mean, what you. everything you have just reinforces the. recovery of the bones, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And then and then you just. have a plate there that just keeps the. bones in order. Yep. And it's I mean all. all the all the titanium in my body is. useless at this point. It did its job. and the bones grown but so it just stays. there now. Is there an argument that the.

titanium hinders you at all? Uh well I. mean it is foreign in foreign metal in. your body. um you're not it's not. rejecting it, but there is a point where. it could, you know, just like allergies, you know, there's sometime you don't get. allergies sometimes for 40 years in your. life and all a sudden I'm allergic to. down. They could reject it. Who knows? You never know. Um I I'll I'll cross that bridge. I'm. worrying about today. I'm here with you. I'll worry about that [ __ ] later. It's. just so impressive. Yeah, it really is.

It really is amazing. Yeah, it's in. Yeah, cuz at any other time in history, you're dead. Yeah. Yeah. any other time. in history. 20 years ago, you're dead. Goner. Yeah, you're a goner. 20 years. ago. It's insane, right? It's amazing. It's amazing. What a what a great. blessing to have all those people that. even like the the the EMTs and all the. people that were there that did. life-saving stuff that did all this. stuff that they had to do. Man, there's. so. much, you know, and I'm really known in. that community, especially in the EMTs. and all that sort of stuff. I have a lot.

of firefighter friends and all that. stuff. So, it's just like a there, you. know, you're just getting a little extra. juice and love from these people, you. know, like I knew um one of my best. friends is a firefighter in that area, Jesse, and he just retired and he got. the phone call from his buddy who had to. like stab my chest and release the. pressure from the lung and da da like on. the ice. I'm like, and he's the one that. says, "Look, dude, Jesse, Jeremy's he's. in we did the best we could, dude. You. don't want to get to the hospital." Wow. And that's like code for like gone. He's.

gone. He's gone. Yeah. Yeah. But I mean you But they were like, you. know, I talked to them all later. I saw. every nurse. I saw every doctor. I went. by every ENT, even the pilot that flew. me up there and just had to give. everyone the biggest squeeze and. apologize if I was a pain in the ass or. whatever it was, man. Um it's that uh reminds me of just why. I'm back anyway and and what the only. thing that you take with you and is. love, man. Yeah. The beginning of the.

audio book is your daughter. Yeah. Yeah. And that was the one I had the hardest. time with. Yeah. Yeah. Cuz it's. Can you imagine? Yeah. I can't I can't. imagine, you know, dude, does this I mean it must forever change. your perspective on life because you've. crossed back. Yeah. Yeah. Well, it just. made it easier. It's it's it's ripped away. All the. white noise. Things I gave credence to.

or things I gave value to are just. [ __ ] meaningless. [ __ ] [ __ ]. All the [ __ ] [ __ ] is gone. Yeah. And I just don't. Sadly, I'm. in a spinning rock with, you know, people and capitalism stuff with things. just I just don't I don't feel like I. belong. But I do. Yeah, I just a lot of times I. just don't feel like I fit into. um a certain how things are how things. work or seem to work down here or Yeah.

I just I just I just don't do things I I. I don't give give value to. I only do. things that are valuable in my life. That's it. That is it. I do nothing. else. It is amazing how much time and. energy people put into things that. ultimately at the end of the life. they're not valuable. They don't mean. anything and they occupy most of your. thinking. That's right. Or even your. time or like your career. Uhhuh. Right. I mean people do careers that they. [ __ ] hate. Yeah. Whether in a. marriage they [ __ ] despise. You know.

all this stuff is spending too much time. doing what? Why? Why? Why? Because of. fear because of fear get trapped and. it's too difficult to get out and you. know they get too deep and buried in. into some place they get I don't know. paint themselves on a corner you know. It's it's quite sad. Yeah. You know, it is sad, but it's. also I mean, there's an amazing example. that you you can shine to the rest of. the world, that maybe people don't have to go.

through what you went through to realize. that most of what you're thinking about. all day, especially if you're one of. those people that's wrapped up in social. media, most of the things you're. thinking about all day are just. nonsense. Just total nonsense. that's. stealing your life. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's one one of the reasons why I wrote. the book is I hope there's things that. um that I learned and the gifts that I. received from from passing and coming. back and overcoming, you know, huge. obstacles and a lot of a lot of people. can identify with suffering and.

struggle. Um doesn't have to be a. physical struggle, but you know, there's. it's a certain way to think and. perspective that to work your way. through it because it is a lonely lonely. place. And I think there's something. beautiful about the narrative of an. author to a reader or even just audio. which is even more intense because you. got the 911 call and it's kind of. dramatic in that sense but like it's. it's pretty intimate and you can I think. you can really move the needle for. somebody. Yeah. The more open and honest. and vulnerable I am in sharing the.

narrative, the maybe more I have a. chance at connecting with the reader or. listener. No doubt. You know, there's. the thing is about when when you're in. the middle of a struggle, it never seems. like you're going to get out of it. Yeah. And you're trapped. Yeah. Yeah. You feel it. And it's so difficult for. people to trust the process or to trust. that it will get better. And this is. unfortunately why a lot of people end. their lives because they do not think. it's going to get better. And you you. hear it from so many people that almost.

took their life or failed when they. tried to take their life and now. realize, oh my god, I was so wrong. It. does get better. I am better. Everything's better. And I just didn't. see the light. I didn't see the light at. the end of the tunnel. I thought there. was there was just nothing but this. feeling that I couldn't endure. Yeah. That hopelessness, boy, that's he that. weighs heavy, doesn't it? You can't afford that. You can't you. can't give that power. You can't give. that value. You can't. It's I think.

anybody can sink into that, right? Anybody can sink into that. Anybody can. sink into that. It's just so hard for. people that have never gone through. something before. If your life has been. really easy and then all of a sudden. you're tasked with one of the most. difficult burdens ever. Overcoming the. fear and the the the the feeling of. wanting to end life because you can't. take it. Yeah, I've been there. I mean. Jesus. Um I well look I think um people.

need to. suffer. It is an actual requirement of. life and is is the fiber the DNA of. love. Real love and true love and in. perpetuity can't exist without. suffering. It's impossible. Well, you. don't appreciate it. Yeah. It's you have. to have suffering and suffering doesn't. have to be looked at in a negative. thing. It could be looked as a beautiful. thing. It's where real love comes out. of. Yeah. You know, all my suffering,

there was real love in there. Everyone around me just in this recovery. or in a loss I may have had from an. uncle or a grandparent or whatever. You. know, there's there's real love that. comes in that suffering. You know, even. though it can be a lonely experience, I. mean, I look at it that way and not as a. negative terrible thing because it's. just temporary and it's intuitive. though. What's that? It's. counterintuitive in the negative term of. it, right? But we all have to suffer, right? I mean, it's part of the human.

experience, right? It's the Joe Rogan. experience. I'm not suffering. I'm having a great. time with you. But you know, I don't. think people welcome that or allow that. to happen in their lives and let it be. okay. That the suffering that we suffer. like that at the hard times are the. building blocks to our to who we are. It. builds resilience, builds character, builds all those things. Yeah. I. remember one time, I mean, this is a. minor suffering in comparison, but one. time I went on this uh hunting trip on.

Prince of Wales Island, which rains like. 350 days a year. And so we were up there. for a week just getting drenched and you. know you're camping. So you're in a tent. and you think, "Oh well, I'll be dry in. the tent." And you're not dry in the. tent. There's no dry. There's no such. thing as dry. I remember I turned my. headlamp on in the tent once cuz I had a. pee and I was going to step out of the. tent to go to the bathroom in the rain. And when I pressed the headlamp inside. my tent, all I saw inside the tent was.

water vapor. It was just filled with. moisture. There was just water dot like. droplets all flying around inside the. tent. I'm like, "Oh my god, you're never. going to be dry. There's no dry." And. you know, it was just miserable but fun. I was with good friends and we had a. good time. Then I came back to LA uh you. know a week later and I remember I. called my friend Steve Vanella. I called. because he's the one who took me on the. trip and I said, "Dude, it's sunny out. and I've never appreciated the sun like.

this before. I have I'm I'm like I'm at. a level of happiness that I don't think. I've ever felt before. I'm just sitting. outside with my eyes closed just taking. the sun. It was wonderful. LA's always. sunny. You get so used to it. It's like. you're a trust fund kid, you know, like. who can't appreciate money because. you've always had it. It doesn't mean. anything to you. But now all of a sudden. going just being drenched for seven days. and being in that sun, I was like, "Ah.". Uh and then it made me realize like, oh,

you need to suffer. You need to suffer. You're never going to appreciate this. life. You need and either you. voluntarily suffer or you will suffer. involuntarily because life regular life. will make you suffer. Yeah, very true. It's it's not it seems sort of um. antihuman to want to do something to. make yourself suffer, right? It doesn't. seem very sort of characteristics of we. always want to take the fastest route to. get somewhere, the easy. It's, you know, it's just innate and kind of human. nature to to do that sadly. And it.

doesn't and that that that leads to a. life of complacency and mediocrity. Well, if you look at life today and if. you look at society today, we have. unprecedented levels of depression and. unprecedented levels of anxiety and. unhappiness. Yet, it's probably the. safest time ever. And it's probably the. easiest time ever. It's so easy that. poor people are fat. That's how easy it. is. Like that's never been the case. All. throughout history, poor people were.

starving. Yeah. And poor people are fat. now. Like that's how easy it is to live. just to exist. So I mean not not saying. that being poor is easy. It's certainly. not. This is certainly a struggle. But. it's way easier than starving to death. Like this is like an unprecedented easy. time. And because of that and because. there's this narrative that people have. to constantly seek comfort, to seek. vacation and relaxation and retirement. and all that [ __ ] And so that's in.

your head and there's this softness to. existence. And so everything that comes. your way is overwhelming. Somebody said. this once and it's like a great quote. that I remember. the worst thing that's. ever happened to you is the worst thing. that's ever happened to you, regardless. of how small that is. So, if the worst. thing that's ever happened to you is. like I remember uh my girlfriend broke. up with me when I was 18 and I was like, "Oh, I couldn't believe it. I thought I. was going to be with her forever." I was. so sad. And then I think back like, "Oh.

my god, that was the best thing that. ever happened." She was a nightmare. But. back then I thought I was probably a. nightmare, too. But back then I thought. like life was over, right? which is but. you have to get through that in order to. appreciate life to really appreciate. life but we have this bizarre narrative. in our head that you shouldn't suffer I. know where does that come from I can't. well because it used to be so difficult. to live cuz and so you would try to find.

a time where it wasn't difficult and so. then it became the thing that everybody. focused on focused on chilling relaxing. you know and the people that I know that. don't do anything and don't take any. chances and don't take any risks and. don't exercise and just seek comfort are. the most miserable, anxietyridden people. I know. Well, that's Yeah, they're. pretty much dead inside, right? It's. complacency and it's that's the. definition of complacency. But again, it's counterintuitive, right? Because. you think comfort is easy. It's. relaxing. It's nice, but it's only.

relaxing if you've earned it. Yeah. Yeah. You got to get through something. in order to appreciate just chilling on. the couch. Yeah. Yeah. So that's why I. always do I I have to fight my I have to. trick my own behavior into doing things. I don't want to do all the time. You. know, if I don't want to do it, I'm. like, "Oh, I'm going to do it. Don't. even think about it. Just go do it.". Right? Because I know the lazy mind just. wants to like, "Oh, yeah. This let me. just let me skip the gym today or let me. not do PT today or whatever the heck it. is. And I I don't want to get poked and.

prodded." No, just do it. Just go do it. Right. Right. The thing you don't want. to do is the thing you probably should. be doing almost always. Yeah. And I. That's why I pretty much always just do. that. It It gets me out of my way, out. of complacency, out of just like. laziness. I just It doesn't exist. because I do the opposite of what I want. to do. Well, that's why you're happy. And that's why I'm so full of joy, dude. I'm I'm so happy. I've never been. happier. more connected to humans, more. connected to my daughter, more connected. to myself, more centered in my spirit.

Where I am right now, where I'll go, where I'll be, where I always am and. always have been. is beautiful, man. It's beautiful. You. got to conquer your inner [ __ ] You do, man. That's what it is. There's an inner. [ __ ] inside of everyone that's like, let's just do nothing. You got to go. shut the [ __ ] up. You have to have like. two minds. You have Yeah. Well, you you. got to surround yourself with others too. that can inspire you too, right? To so. then you do things as as a even as you.

and I to go work out, do something. It's. a lot easier than going to the gym by. yourself, right? You try to create. because we are social creatures. So, let's do things that like I'm doing like. I'm building a whole like rehab recovery. center at my house. Like, well, maybe I. kind of open this to the public and like. make this a communal cool thing so. everyone has access to this stuff. And. I'm still considering doing that, but. like just make it a a a place to to be. and hang so it's everyone can do it and. I'm not it's not just me, right? Right.

Separating myself from other people, whatever it might be in my life. There's. there's I try to find ways to make it a. communal thing. So it just makes it. easier to to continue this in in. perpetuity. That's another. counterintuitive thing. It's like you. have to understand how important. community is. It's like a vitamin. Yeah. Big time. It really is. Yeah. Well, that's a shared experience too that. comes with that negative or positive in. the tent with your friends. You know, if. you're alone in doing that, right? It's. [ __ ] you have no one to share that. misery with. But at least you did you.

shared that experience with somebody. You're like, "Dude, never thought I love. the sun so much. Remember we were. [ __ ] eating ass sucking on the rain. water in that tent, you know?" But it's. like even a negative experience can be. but it's shared. is still quite. beautiful and it's a it's a map a. milestone a part of your life that you. use as barometer to change your or. appreciate the sun more or whatever it. might be right so those shared. experiences I think are invaluable it's. the only thing I chase in my life is. that. for people uh that ever want to start a. fire when it's everything's wet Fritos.

you know little Fritos little bags of. Fritos those little [ __ ] are so. toxic that if you light those things. they're like little Fire starters. No. way. Yeah, man. Fritos are crazy. flammable. They stay lit for a long ass. time cuz they're just soaked with oil. Oil. Yeah. Yeah. Like whatever oil, whatever horrible [ __ ] seed oil, whatever [ __ ] industrial lubricant. those [ __ ] things are made out of. But when you light that, they're. essentially some sort of a corn.

byproduct and oil. Right. Right. And so. you if you light those [ __ ] on fire. and then you get some semi dry sticks. and light them, light those. Listen, we. started one fire one day cuz one day it. didn't rain. So that one day it didn't. rain. Me and my friend Brian Ken, we. were determined to start a fire and so. we just found like the driest possible. and nothing was dry but driest possible. sticks and twigs and started it and then. dried some logs out and it was they were. hissing and steam was coming off them as.

we were lighting it. But Fritos Fritos. are an amazing fire starter. Kind of crazy. That's crazy. Makes you. think about eating though. What am I? I. just going to say you guys about to eat. this [ __ ] Yeah. Which brings me to. another question. Like how much did you. alter your diet after all this? Because. I would imagine like anything that. causes inflammation then becomes an. issue. Yeah. I didn't go down so much. that route. I've always eaten pretty. good. Um I I didn't it didn't go into. like things that I haven't gone into.

that even yet to like, oh, what causes. inflammation? What what what am I eating. that does that? I I haven't really. gotten that far into it yet. I'm still. I'm sure I will, but or and there was a. doctor also helping me stuff and I have. people cook prepare some certain things. for me, but I don't couldn't tell you. what causes inflammation that I put in. my mouth. Um could not I mean maybe if I. have wine probably does and alcohol. alcohol does for sure. Yeah. Yeah. Um. but I again I don't do I I I really am.

good at u moderating all things all. things good and bad. So, um, my body has. a chance to sort of exist and it's not. forced too many supplements, too many. peptides, too many too many anything, right? All good stuff. I sort of just. moderate. So, um, once I got my blood right, because I was. like 205 pounds, I'd never been more. than a buck 65 and it just all this. surgery weight and all this stuff and. it's hard to get off when you have a you.

hemoglobin's two. I just had no energy. So, also you probably have to eat a lot. too because your body needs calories in. order to help you that that and get. proteins too. Yeah. And also it's. difficult to eat because again my mers. got pushed in. It's hard to chew. I look. fine but to chew it on on a nice steak. and asparagus thing it's like this. tough. It's tough for me to get through. still to this day or no? Yeah. Yeah. It'll be forever. I can't fix it. If I. start to move those mers again, they'll. probably fall out. Oh wow. Yeah. And I'd. rather keep them and just be.

uncomfortable. So they just they got. pushed in. Yeah. This side. Um yeah, it's usually sort of like just like an. arc to your thing. So my bite just kind. of arcs and then goes straight back. Oh. wow. Yeah. All these got pushed in and. broke broke the jaw three times here. So. and then in just breaking the jaw. doesn't ever really heal, right? So. biting down is quite it's annoying. It's. a it's full chaos in my mouth, but I. don't [ __ ] about it. I just sort of. accept what it is. And um it could have. been so much worse. Could have been so I. have all my teeth. I have a smile. It's.

great. you know, and I I feel great and. and um I'm walking and breathing and I. have nothing but love and joy in my. life. So, you know, who cares about what. happens in my mouth, man. Right. Right. You know what I mean? Yeah. No, that's. it's it's really kind of an amazing. story and it's it's just amazing how. these stories can be so inspirational. for other people, too, which is why I'm. really glad you wrote your book because. these stories there like. autobiographies, especially of people. that you admire, that you've seen in. movies before. It's like those those.

struggles, they're so real. And when. someone's going through something. themselves and they can turn to your. book, it can give them a lot. It's fuel. for people. It really is. Yeah. And for. me as well, I mean, I'm I resisted. writing it because I still don't know. how or why it can and will inspire. people. I can only make assumptions and. I think it's so particular to the actual. reader and the person, but so I can. never sort of pontificate on how or why. it's important or not. But it is like it. was an achievement for me to get through.

it word by. word that I didn't want to do to relive. it and then because it's in my body and. I talk about it all the time. It is it. is a part of my narrative as a part of. my life. It's just recovery is just it's. just my life and I love it. I enjoy it. I I feel better. I look better and all. that stuff. But it's like the book now. is a tangible sort of this is this is a. a great dialogue that we'll have as long. as we want. But it's just a dialogue. that exists. But now this is a tangible. object with words. The words don't.

change. They stay there, right? Like a. tablet. And something kind of. interesting about that is like a. milestone or a tangible thing that now. it exists in the world, right? And. psychologically that says a lot to me. So like even when I do die, that's still. there. So maybe it can help somebody. even when I can't be there to talk with. them or whatever it might be or even. exist, right? Something exists long. after. Yeah. It's pretty it's pretty. interesting because I do movies and. things like that or music. Those are. like the same thing as a conversation.

They just sort of exist in the moment. Like you know it's great going to a. concert but then it's over, right? And. then that's it. Well, what happened? Well, I can tell you about the concert, but something about something existing. beyond your your your life is something. pretty interesting. What was the process. like of writing? Did you physically sit. down and write things? Did you how did. you initially initially I I have a a. ghost writer who helped me because I've. never written a book. Um I' I've written. a lot but I've never written a book. This is so I wanted to get the format. right. And so we would work through this.

format. It's almost like an outline and. then so we just do interview by each of. the sections of this outline that we put. out. And so then we would just talk like. this and they told let's talk about this. thing. Tell take me moment by moment in. the accident. I'm like all right let's. do that. and we'd meet every day for. like two, three hours, however long I. could sustain going word by word on it. and we'd record it all and things and I. would write on my own because it would. kick up new memories and started writing. about the Lama thing and oh gosh that. came up and let me that became a whole.

chapter in the book uh about breathing. breathing my my my awareness to. breathing and how it became so important. in my life. Um anyway, so I just kept. going and writing and writing and. writing and then I would do talks to to. companies. I would speak to kids at. schools. I would all this is part of the. writing experience because you can ask. me the same question and then but we're. in this environment. But then if I'm. with my family and I tell the answer the. same question, it's a different it's the. same kind of answer but different. So I.

kept learning more and more data and. information was start stored in my brain. and my heart and my spirit and I had to. unearth it and put it down into words. which is which I found to be the most. difficult thing because as we speak like. I'm doing now it's it's it's it's free. to speak as whatever you want but to. write down the words oh wait there's. accountability to the words because. they're written and you didn't have more. you have more word choice. my brain. doesn't operate as fast as I' i'd like. to for my. vocabulary. I'd probably drop way too.

many fbombs instead of like really great. words that I do know, right? You know, so uh it was nice to be able to take the. time and spend the agony to really kind. of express uh word by word through it, you know, in in a very real honest way. It's like it's more like a like a diary, a recounting diary than it was trying to. um be fancy with words and um over. complicate something that's really quite. so simple. What was the process like of. going over the words and deciding what.

to keep and what to edit out and how to. how to format everything and what what. order to talk about things in. The the. order always was working for me from the. beginning. It allowed for flexibility. for what would come up in conversations. in in the writing. It allowed for. fluidity, but there's a beginning, middle, and end to this. We already knew. the end. I knew the beginning. And so it. it was it was the branches off of I. didn't know I was going to talk about.

Lamas in this book. didn't know that was. a huge. um milestone in my life that got me to. understand what conscious breathing was. and mitigate pain because there's this. whole thing about lamas I was taking at. 12 years old my mom was pregnant with my. sister and she said put down this the. cleat son you're not going to soccer. practice grab a pillow you're coming. with me to the class I'm like what class. it was class the YMCA and my stepdad was. out driving a truck or something and so.

my mom. She needed also needed me not to. be alone, but and she needed, you know, whatever. So, she brought me the oldest. and I laid there with a pillow between. her legs and teaching her how to breathe. and short short breasts and then they. pulled down a screen and they showed. this midwife birth at home in a bathtub. and squirting out water this whole thing. like what's going on? I'm 12 years old. I'm like I'm mortified like what. happened? Is that a whale breaching? What was going on? you know, and uh so. that came up in just sort of me and my.

partner talking about it and he's like, "Dude, you don't realize." I'm like, "Yeah, well, this why the book's called. My Next Breath." You know, it's all. about breathing and breathing was. such a essential part of my recovery, my. essential part of my ex, you know, not. dying and to get through each and every. moment. Uh the perspective of of breath. and it is not a conscious thought. It is. right. It just it's just it's reflexive. in our body and when we make it a.

consciousness when we invest into our. breath what you can do with your mind. with your breath right it opens up like. if you the more you breathe the more you. get oxygen in your body it's just. feeding all of us it feeds you it feed. only feeds you right because like yawn. people yawn and I say the example of. like oh you're tired no you're not tired. it's your body letting you know that you. need to breathe get more oxygen in your. in yourself right so it's you're not. tired You just need more O2. That's all. Your body's making that happen. Isn't it. fascinating that everybody breathes? So,

everybody thinks, "Oh, breathing, what's. the big deal?" It's like, have you ever. read James Netor's uh breath? Or it's. actually breathe, I guess. Uh but it's. an amazing book on breathing techniques. and the history of breathing techniques. and all the different things that people. have achieved with breathing techniques. including holotropic breathing which. achieves psychedelic states of. consciousness and all these you know. different feats of incredible physical.

endurance that people have achieved. through breath work. Mhm. It's a pretty. amazing book and he was a guest of mine. on the podcast a few years back. But I I. read his book and started really getting. into it and really trying to practice. different breathing exercises and great, you know, brea there's a bunch of. breathing exercises you can use for. anxiety, for overcoming very stressful. situations. But when you say that to. most people, oh breathing, they're like, oh, you're one of those guys. They're.

like, oh, you're concentrating on your. breathing. What else you concentrating. on? Blinking. You know, it's like. because it's like, you know what I mean? It's like you can minimalize it. Yeah. You could you can you have the. reductionist perspective where you don't. think it's anything big and especially. if you've never practiced it. Yeah. Yeah. But you you know, especially with. like yogic breathing, you can achieve. some bizarre states of relaxation and. consciousness through breathing. Yeah. Big time. Yeah. And you could you could. I I always try whenever I explain it to. somebody it's I I just I say like when I.

use it I just like I don't do it like on. a daily basis. I mean maybe now I do to. um but it's like it's I did it for like. you said for anxiety when I was like. nervous in an audition. Uh how do I get. out of this situation? Like I'm not in. my body. My heart's going like this. I'm. like I'm not how I can't read these. lines and I hear like Sean Penn in the. room and I'm supposed to go there and be. better than this guy. I'm like oh I'm. freaking out. I'm sweating. So I said, "Screw this." I leave the room. I go out. of the building. I go out into the.

street like on Sunset Boulevard. somewhere. Find a tree that's rooted in. this damn earth. I'm, you know, it might. look ridiculous and I don't care. But. the courage to go down on your knees, go. by the root, be in this earth, just take. some deep 10 deep breaths as cars are. honking and da on Sunset Boulevard. I. don't give a [ __ ] I'm back in my body. I'm back on this earth. Here I am. Let's. [ __ ] go. And I went back up in that. room and I smashed that audition and I. don't remember if I got the role or not, but doesn't matter. I was back in my. body. I was back in on Earth, right? I.

wasn't like in the state of hysteria or. nervousness or that, you know, because I. don't like that feeling. So, I found a. way to overcome that feeling. Yeah. Some. people might just live in that feeling. all the time. They might like it. I. don't know. I don't think they like it. I don't think anybody likes it. I think. the problem is you just get trapped in. that feeling and then the moment. something comes up that's very. difficult. Yeah. that causes you to. spiral again. You just you lose control. Yeah. You're out of your head. Yeah. I.

think it's one it's one of the most. difficult things about the this whole. audition process that actors go through. is that, you know, there's this golden. carrot that's at the end of this stick. And if you do a good job, you might be a. [ __ ] movie star. You know what I. mean? Which seems impossible, right? Right. I mean, it must have seemed. impossible before you pulled it off, right? Yeah. Yeah. I know. It's there. was that's never like something I was. ever aiming for. Really? What were you. aiming for? Um, truth and every in.

everything I was doing. Truth. Yeah. Honesty. And truth. How did you Because. if I don't believe it, then how do I. expect someone watching me to believe. it? You know, I have to ensure that. everything I'm doing is truthful and. honest and courageous and bold and, you. know, all the things. So, it was never. to try to be a movie. I just wanted to. work always. I never wanted to be. famous. How did you acquire that. perspective? Oh, I don't know. It's it's. I was clear about what I wanted. Very. clear about what I wanted. I didn't move.

down to LA to be famous. I moved to LA. to be in a movie. Be in a movie that was. big enough that would play in Modesto, California, where I'm from, because they. don't get all the movies there. Right. Right. And being a part in that movie. that I wouldn't have to tell my family, you know, I'm the guy in the red shirt. waving in the background. It's a part. big enough that you would just know I'm. in the movie. Yeah. So, and I got that. all those goals. uh in the first job I ever did on camera. in this national lampoon senior trip. movie. So, then I had to recalibrate now. new goals to also get myself da da da.

and I was working enough. So, I never my. goals were always to like and then I. wanted to be you know the lead and you. know by the time I got like Dmer and. then Hurt Locker and all this kind of. stuff it just kind of made I was ready. for that stuff but I was like 38 by that. time. I was like the new guy in town at. 38, right? So, isn't that crazy? Yeah. I. was just I was just ready and you know I. did my journeyman stuff. Was [ __ ]. amazing. This is one of the most complex. movies about a very bizarre. psychological state that people acquire.

or that people fall into when it comes. to war. Yeah. Yeah. What was it like. getting into that mindset? It's it was. interesting. I got to spend, you know, I. was at Fort Irwin for about a year. learning how to build bombs and render. them safe, you know, for a year. Yeah. Yeah. And got just got to spend time. with the guys and gals off ca off c off. off campus off base.

Um interesting. I love I love the whole. experience, you know, and then got to go. shoot the movie and that was on the. Iraqi border in Jordan during the war. and uh it's 135 degrees and 100 pound. bombsuit, you know, you're just it's not. even hot anymore. It's just sort of like. you let that go. It's just you just are. it's kind of a spiritual sort of place. you have to go in that kind of that kind. of heat, right? Um, and also you're. drinking enough water. Like, you know, how am I drinking all this water? You're.

not even taking a leak and like, "Yo, I'm so dehydrated. Got to be careful.". Um, and that's, you. know, Yeah. pretty pretty interesting. Pretty interesting, um, experience, you. know. What were the conversations like. when you were talking to the people that. actually did that? Well, most of them look like, you know, school teachers. There's like one one or. two guys that one guy was like kind of. built like huge big guy br the rest of. them were like you know the guy I know. did three tours he was he's just looks.

like he's totally out of shape. His. stomach was way bigger than his chest. just kind of kind of this guy did three. tours. This guy's no joke. It's all. mental. It's all such a mental game. because you have to be cool in those. high intense situations because you're. dealing with 155 explosives that'll blow. this building off the block. And. uh the the the the level of intensity is. really interesting. Like they were so. comfortable around C4 and all these.

things and blah blah and you got to be. careful these blasting caps and all. these things that people were getting. injured all the time. They got really. uncomfortable when I took them to a bar. in LA. Why? We were sitting at the bar and I. asked I'm like what's going on? It's the. is the big guy. I can't remember his. name. He's like I don't like where we're. sitting. Like what? What do you mean? He's like I need my back to the wall. and you know where the exit is at and. right and like interesting like because. I sit like that kind of as well. I don't. like to have I don't think it's a trust. issue. I just like to kind of I'd have. my back to somewhere I know where the.

exit is where the bathroom is. I look. for the the most dangerous man in the. room, the hottest girl in the room. It's. just do like a like a Terminator. checklist, right? And that was supported. by how these guys thought. And it's that. same kind of thing. They just notice. everything just data. Okay, now I can go. be here. I assess the room and I feel. safe. Situational awareness. Yeah, sit. awareness. I always had that, but like. really doing that role and spending so. much time with these crew of amazing. people. Um, just heightened that for me.

The I've always been quiet and observer. and this is where I just got. information. I could tell you the color. of the the hinges if they match the. finish on the doorork knobs and places. and it's just that my how my brain works. and always. Yeah. Yeah. Alcohol's. awesome. I'm a home builder and. designer, so I kind of pay attention to. that kind of stuff anyway. Um, but it. sort of just kind of helps me out in. life, I guess. And so when you were. preparing for Hurt Locker, was it your. decision to spend a year doing this? Well, no, it wasn't about the amount of.

time. I think I was maybe to go for. maybe a few months. Katherine Bigalow, the director, um, just sort of. introduced me, said, "All right, they. they're ready for you out the base if. you want to go." So kind of went out and. just kind of did it all on my own and. just waiting for the movie to kind of. get up and get green lit and go. Then. just took a little bit longer. I think. we're waiting for one of the actors that. was doing another job to finish and then. we could. start and then uh and then it wasn't an. easy independent film to kind of get up. and get rolling. But once we did, we. were rocking. But yeah, it it didn't.

meant to be like a year year and a half. It was she just called me and she's. like, "Are you ready to go?" I'm like, "Yeah, like like I'm getting deployed.". Like, "Yeah, let's go. I'm ready.". And then I also like we didn't even have. a like an EOD sort of tech on on the. shoot. I had to be the person that and. I'm I had to call back. I'm like, I. don't know. This doesn't look right. They set up these these 155s and it's. electrical and it should be dead cord. and all these all these things that I. learned, but I wasn't an expert by any. means. I I I just wanted to make it look. authentic in the movie. So, I had to. call back and call me back. Let me take.

a picture of this [ __ ] I don't think. it's right. Oh, wow. And um Yeah. So I. Well, that's fortunate that you had so. much experience then. Yeah, it was. great. It was great because if there's. anything out of in that movie, especially for people that actually did. that that takes you out of it. Yeah. You. know, Yeah. Yeah. And I wouldn't want to. do that cuz we wanted to be very. authentic to what we were doing. We are. still making a movie, but let's live in. this world. And look, the the the. narrative is the the characters that. live in this bizarre world in a very.

relevant time in this this war that. we're in. And and and also the struggles. of, you know, soldier in civilian life. and because they were civilians and now. they became soldiers, they'd be put in. prison for life for doing the [ __ ]. they're getting paid to do now. And. that, you know, and that was a wonderful. sort of outcome of the movie of how it. bridged that sort of gap or the. struggles of with PTSD and coming back. from this harrowing sort of existence. and war and then coming back and like.

like the serial aisle that example of. like oh really like you know or in the. rain and like you appreciate the sun. It. just it's just such a polar opposite and. like this is my existence and it became. such a really a wonderful sort. of starting point for like wives to deal. with their husbands that came back like. they can you kind of understand a little. bit of what they might have gone through. just in general like the the broad. strokes of how hard it is and then to. come back and then like you know change.

diapers and do the thing you know what I. mean it's uh that became such a a. powerful thing in in that narrative that. I found after we did it and we're. showing it to all the military bases and. um it's it's always going to be a. special um experience in my life and. I'll always be connected to a lot of. soldiers because of that. Well, it was a. really well done movie and it was the. way you could well there was a thing. about that movie that made you think in. a way or made me think in a way that I. don't think I ever thought before like.

oh I never considered what this. transition to civilian life is like. after dealing with the unbelievable. stress of being in a war zone diffusing. bombs. and then wanting to go back. Yeah. Like. but it made you understand. It made you. understand like oh [ __ ] he wants to go. back like oh my god like watching a. movie like when a movie can do that to. you when it could take you into that. psychology of the person that would be.

in that state. Yeah. And and make it. make sense like that's that was a great. movie. Yeah. I'm just happy to be part. of it. It was more than just you know it. wasn't just a story. It was like you're. you're documenting a very real. condition. Yeah. that you know through. art you put words to these people's. existence where they don't you know they. don't have anybody representing that. Yeah. You know that's why it means a lot. to me and and they let me know it means. a lot to them and that's the most.

special thing like [ __ ] it the movie. part of it. I think it's it's created a. dialogue for a lot of broken families or. and united families better or there's a. like you said it's a a greater. understanding of like that difference of. soldier civilian life. It's a great. bridge for it. Yeah, I remember very. proud of that. I saw it and then I went. back to the comedy store and uh I I said. uh oh man we saw Hurt Locker last night. and my friend went dude and I went dude. and that was like all we had to say like. [ __ ] man that it's like that it was that.

kind of movie that's just like oh my god. like it just gives you. anxiety and it also it also just makes. you like really reflect and and think. about what war is and the and the. requirement that you're putting on human. beings to try to get them to transition. from this insane chaos back into. civilian life with no real guidance. Yeah. Just you figure this out now.

you're now you're back in this in the. serial aisle. Yeah. Yeah. Starbucks or. you're like ah Yeah. Yeah. It's. interesting. How do you decide like what. roles to pick when you know you're at. this sort of stage in your life where. you're so well known you know you people. come to you with things and you have to. decide whether or not this project is. something that resonates with you. Well. now it's different. Um you know the the.

central part of my life for for so long. was my career and then my daughter came. around and then she's number one. So. then I would. do the job that would allow me still to. be a father because I'm not gonna not be. a father because my job takes me away. for long periods of time and just not. doing that in far places. So I would so. I'm not I'm not working out of the. country anymore once my daughter was. born. So I always had reach and access to my. daughter, you know, as fast as I needed. to be. And then now after the incident,

I it's even tightened up more and. loosened up more because my daughter is. now 12 and she doesn't need me as much. She wants her friends a little bit more, right? A little bit lower on the tonal. pole just temporarily, I know. But um. and also I can I can travel like I just. worked last summer on a job. There's a. movie called Knives Out. Um and then. they got I got brought my whole family. with me. Knives Out was great. Yeah, it's awesome. Yeah. So this is going to. be a really good one, too. But I was.

able to bring my entire family out. Like. 15 15 people came out because they a lot. of them not well traveled and I got to. see a lot of Europe. Took my mom and my. daughter to the Olympics in in Paris. Dope. Got to spend a couple weeks in. Italy and just kind of celebrate. Yeah. So we can do that kind of stuff now. So. I did the job essentially just to have a. summer vacation with my family. Oh, nice. So that's kind of how I decide and. also I did love the character. I did. love I mean come on. All that has to. line in there too. I'm not just going to. do a job for a job but it just lined up. But my family has to be involved. My.

daughter has to be involved. Um, uh, friends have to be involved. Otherwise, I'm not going to remove myself from all. those shared experience with people in. my life just so I can go do a movie. I. don't want to do any movie that bad. So, um, that's my limitation. Well, that's. that limitation is real success, too. Do. you really choose things that you're. actually passionate about that fit. within these parameters and allow you to. live your life the way you want to? Yeah. And work with people that inspire. me. and think, you know, I'm just not. going to do a job like you can't pay me.

I mean, you could put trillion dollars. in front of me. Go do this. You only. need you for two weeks. I'm like, it. doesn't fit. Doesn't check all the boxes. that have real value, the shared. experience, the joy with my daughter, my. family, my friends, and you know, then. it's just not worth it to me. You know, I I don't need to go. act for to do a job. I don't. Right. You. know, you do it because you want to. Yeah. Yeah. And that's that's to me what. retirement is. and I'm doing what I want. to do with who I want to do it with and. I'm still always gonna be busy and work.

all my life I'll do that. Yeah, but stop. retired. But am I Yeah, but it is my. life. Well, it is in my mind. I'm a busy. guy and I like I like to I like to I. like to contribute. I'm very busy doing. the renovation foundation, right? which. is a huge big central part of my life. with my family that runs this this uh. charitable foundation in my community in. Lake Tahoe for foster youth and. disadvantaged youth and giving them. opportunities that they don't have these. poor kids u and that's great and I love. that I love I get but is that retirement.

like you know it's it's going to keep me. busy for till I die it's weird that you. have to frame things in a ter like. career or retirement it's really just. life life and passions yeah exactly But. I don't think a lot of people are doing. what they want to do in their life. anyway. Um, but yeah, I I'll always. always work, always do the things I love. to do, and I'm still continuing to do. the things I love to do just on my own. terms, right? I wouldn't be able to start this. foundation if I wasn't living life on my. own terms. I am satiated beyond.

satiated. I don't need. anything. I require a shared experience. on this earth and that is it. Is this. more so now since the accident? Uh, well, it's always been that, but there. was a lot of things in the way or things. I allowed to be in the way or things I. put in the way. Allowed to be in the. way. Yeah, I allowed to be in the way. And now I do not. I refute it. I push it. away. I I'm certainly clear when I put. obstacles on my own way, when I get my. own way. We all do that [ __ ] too. But,

uh, so I I'm just very very very clear. and I keep I oversimplify. life because life is just that simple. If we complicate it, then you're going. to have an over complicated life and. it's just not as valuable. I think I. live both. Yeah. And the wonderful over. oversimplification has allowed me to. again use the word retirement in my. mind. I'm just living a life that I want. to live, right? that I deserve to live, that I choose to live and not be limited. or rabbit holed or victimized by society.

or the country I'm living in or the. neighborhood I'm living in or the job I. have or you know and just not I don't. have any limitations because I'm do I'm. making manifest everything that I have. in my. life and it feels great and you know I'm. the captain of the ship. That's right. It might take a minute to turn this. [ __ ] around, right? But I'm the captain. of this damn ship. but it's called my. life and I think everybody has a. capacity to do so. Well, that's another. beautiful thing of living life by. example that can inspire people because.

that's really what people want to do. They want to live a life where they feel. like this is great like what I'm doing. is what I want to do. They don't most. people they don't live like that. Most. people they have this dream in the. future one day I will be able to live. the way I want to but I'm not doing it. right now. Right. Right. I think I think. that's a trap. Personally, I think. you're doing it already. The journey is. there. There's no end result besides. Yeah. You I know, but there's so many. narratives that people adhere to.

There's so many narratives out there in. culture where they tell you you should. be doing this and you should be doing. that and yeah, this is a concentrate on. your 401k and your this and that. What. are your investments? Yeah. And you [ __ ] the end of the night you. need a pill to go to sleep. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean that's it's even crazier. now with social media and all that. All. the that's poison. That's just white. noise. Garbage. I've been off it lately.

for like the last few weeks where I I. literally just check it when I'm taking. a [ __ ] and that's it. Yeah. And I look I. look to see if there's anything crazy. going on in the world just so I know. what's what's happening. Yeah. But I. don't ever get involved. I don't ever. like argue with people or post things. and I just see people doing it and I'm. like, you're losing your [ __ ] mind. And I've had conversations with friends. and they're like, you know, you know. what? [ __ ] this and that and that and. this. I'm like, why? Why are you paying.

attention? This is like, let's go. outside. Look, look at all the birds. Yeah. Look, it's beautiful. Look at the. clouds. What a lovely day. Like, you're. you're alive in America in 2025 is like. a magical time to be alive. When you're. concentrating on some [ __ ] that. literally has no effect on your life and. you're making it your primary focus, that is the definition of madness. Yeah. I mean, it really is. Yeah. You're. freaking out about things that aren't. even here. Yeah. Well, that's where you. get in your way. You're giving that. value. You don't have to, you know?

Yeah. But, you know, it's just like. perspective is a very difficult thing to. earn. And so, it is. It is. Well, right. What how do we get it? How do we get it? Experience, right? Experience. overcoming adversity, developing. character, shared experience, that's a big part of. it, you know, like with people that you. love and you you really connect with who. you surround yourself with. So. important, right? That's most of the key. to life. Yeah. Like if you surround.

yourself with really great people, you're forced to become a really great. person. It's like you have to keep up. with it. Yep. This foundation, tell me. how you started that. uh initially. started with a a show that I produced. and put on Disney Plus which is called. Renovations and it was taking I didn't. like to see a lot of uh vehicles go to. waste um like purpose-built vehicles. like a city bus or a fire truck and all. these things that supposed to go a long. long long ways but they just replace.

them even though they're perfectly good. vehicles. So I wanted to repurpose those. and help them and help u you know. communities in need and like so it's. taking like I built one which to be a. water truck like a box truck to be a. water water uh treatment plant to give. um kids uh in villages with terrible. water and be able to you know reverse. osmosis their water give them drinkable. water their school or take a there's. a took a city bus and turned it into. like a dance studio mobile dance studio. for these kids in in Mexico and just.

these creative sort of things and it's. kind of like Pit My Ride but with like. real valuable things, you know, just. take these really cool purpose-built. trucks and staying and make it something. really spectacular for these kids, all. kids driven to give them um what their. what their needs are. And then it just. went into like I didn't want to make it. about just vehicles when I wanted to. start the foundation. It became a. wonderful calling card. And then I so I. started the foundation and my sister. works for DCFS was child protective. services in Los Angeles County and one. of my best girlfriends in in Reno, she.

also works for CPS Child Protective. Services there. So I've been working. with foster youth for many many many. years uh privately and now I just wanted. to really get invested into the. community. I started small in northern. greater northern Nevada. and it's and then my sister now is. running it and Shane is running it as. well with me and the whole family's now. gotten involved and it's been really. wonderful to come back from the. incident. Have this be a. central goal for uh us to celebrate our.

time together as a family and to give. back to these kids that are in great. need. And it is it is a been a dream of. mine that I've been wanting to do for a. long time and now do it publicly. I've. been doing it privately for a long time. and to really make a big big splash and. and make a lot of movement um for these. kids. And it's I think it's one of the. reasons why I was brought back outside. of all the other things. But I think. there's something working in my favor to.

to come back outside just you know my. family and and I think it is my reach to. kids and my ability to have a great. effect for them and it's been uh a. couple years now and it's already been. moved move moved the mountains for kids. already and will continue to do so. This. is like me breathing. This is easy. I. love this. This is a part of my fiber in. my body. I'm the oldest of seven in my. family. I've been changing diapers and. living as the oldest. It's sort of my. birthright to be able to do. What makes. it even cooler is that I'm I'm a Marvel.

superhero, so I have like a reach and. access to these kids that they even. listen to, right? They're like, "Oh, cool. Let's go to camp with Hawkeye. That's just dope." And they all show up. with plastic sacks, right? And this is. like all their valuables in their life. And it makes me weep, right? And this is. all they're worth. And they show up with. Hefty bags, all of them. So we give them. rollers with their names on and a. passport is a journal. And they can I'm. going to change the narrative of this of. their of their tra you're a traveler. now. You're a world traveler. You're not. you're not carrying your trash around.

We're all your your worth in it. Your. worth is much bigger than that. We're. going to just planting seeds like that. in their head and then creating. community for them. Creating. opportunities for them, safe places for. them, giving them more educated stuff, giving we g we brought in recording. studio bus for them to touch all these. instruments they'd never have access to. Who knows what that does? I don't care. Let it let it have access to things, right? Give these kids opportunities. that they deserve. This is the future of. our [ __ ] planet. Why aren't we giving. more time and effort to that? It's the.

future of our world, man. Just give them. just give them all the tools. We need. another uh Elon. We need other super. smart, amazing people, man. We need. that. We need other leaders. And you. know, what do we give in our youth, especially our foster youth, man? It's. not a good look. They've gone through a. lot of struggles, these kids, man. and. they're not going to struggle. Not on my. dime, not on my time. That's amazing. So, it's easy for thing for me to do. I. love it's a great focus for me that's um. outside of.

uh it's things I enjoy, right? I still. do things that I enjoyed. I just get to. do it with these kids and have they. teach me so much. I learned so much. They keep me in a. really youthful spirit. I It's It's. harrowing to hear what they've been. through. Joe, I don't like to know. My. sister knows all about it. Shaya knows. all about it because they get the phone. calls. They have relationships with a. lot of these kids. They know, dude. I. mean, I'd flip you. You You'd probably.

react like I would. You want to flip a. table. You want to go hurt some people, you know, and it's so I'd prefer not to. know how they got touched and who did it. and da da, you know, this kind of stuff. I just choose to focus on let's give. these kids a plant some seeds of hope. And I'm good at that [ __ ] That's. awesome. And I love it. So, we're on jet. skis. They're talking about they've. never even been to this lake and so. whatever the heck it is, new. experiences, new joy, new friends. They're all crying at the end of this. camp because they had such a good damn. time. One of them was getting adopted. and she was crying because like I can't.

come back because I'm not a foster kid. anymore. I got adopted. Like, no, you. can come back. You know, you know, you. did good then. When she didn't want to. get adopted, like ah, it means we're. doing something right for these kids and. we're going to continue doing it. And. we're doing it not only just as a camp, but we're doing like lots of programs. throughout the year to keep the. community of the foster youth community. together. A lot of these kids are. brothers and sisters that never get to. see each other because they're in. separate homes, separate cities. One's. in Vegas, one's in Reno, right? This. that's dude, you can't do that. You.

can't do that. So, we're doing our best. to unite community, right? Unite. You. need We need each other. These kids need. each other even beyond they they don't. need me. They need access and reasons to. be together. So, it's it's helping the. the foster parents. It's helping the. kids. It's whatever we can do. We're. going to start building um youth centers. as well. We'll be building homes as well. in the future uh with the foundation. But we're starting um step by step, breath at a time, uh brick at brick by. brick and um building camps and and uh.

activities and education for them. And. it's I love it. You can see how much I. love it. I can talk about this for days, man. You're you lit up when you're. talking about Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I feel I. love it, man. I can't. We have these. camps coming up here in June and July. So, uh I'm pumped. Can't wait to finish. this job and go uh go go go go go back. home. That's incredible. Yeah, it's kind. of shocking that it takes individuals to. be inspired to do something like this. because society doesn't put any emphasis. on this. Well, it's like look, there's a.

there's fost states have fostered. programs, right? There's that's why but. there's gaps in the system, man. It's. like kids forgotten kids are forgotten. and then some are it's you know it's. it's it's tragic. It's but um you put a. spotlight on something um put energy. into something um it builds and I got a. loud voice and a big heart and I'm very. actionable what I do and that's why the. foundation's growing and and and making. the the moves and and making the um.

paving ways for for these kids. So I'll. keep doing it, man. And it's like it's. easy to me. How long have you been doing. this now? Um publicly only a couple. years. It's just just started out. So, you know, then it's like learning about. oh god, the nonprofit stuff. It's like, oh man, it's like going out and asking. for money. So, I don't do that. I'll go. do like voiceover jobs and like put. money in the account for I I hate asking. for money for for foundation stuff, you. know? I'll let somebody else kind of.

bother that. I I I do I stay in my lane. I work with the kids and work with the. the ideas and the programs and I let my. sister and uh those guys and the board. deal with like having to raise money and. all those kind of things. It's just not. my wheelhouse. Well, unfortunately, when. people hear nonprofit, they always. think, "Okay, well, where's the money. really going?" Well, that's what it is. And that's why we operate at 8%. I think. 8%. Yeah. Nobody. Incredible. That's the. opposite of how they're usually done. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. So, I mean, even if. we got to because no one's no one takes. anything except just basic operating.

costs and if we're operating at 8% I. think maybe 13%. It's like all the money. is going to the kids, man. All of it. All of it. All of it. So, so I'm trying. to get to the bank account to be full so. we only operate off uh the uh interest. Once we're there, then we can really. start to start start to move needle for. for building things and doing some stuff. in the future. So, I'm excited for that. Are you going to expand this? Yeah, it'll grow. It'll grow. Uh I'm again I.

think that to keep effective for me is. staying in in the home area or just the. state of Nevada at least and not not. going too far. So because I still I'm. very very hands-on and it's important. for me to to be the voice for the. foundation and and for these kids and an. advocate for them and uh so I I Nevada. is kind of the goal for the next maybe. the next five years for sure. And. there's still a ton of kids that I have. not reached and need to reach.

So I I I focused on that. That's. amazing. Yeah. Then there's a then. there's you then there's like getting. the that these youth that they age out. but getting back into being counselors. back in the camp. Um there's a great. thing with UNR with they get a free ride. at the at the the university and a lot. of them are going back into sociology. and psychology and want to go help kids. in foster like this is so great. I want. to give them opportunities to come back. and and help uh the youth and maybe give. them guidance. God, this is awesome.

Self-healing and cathartic in its own. way. Whatever we can do, man. It's a. it's it's a it's a it's a wonderful. wonderful life. It's amazing because you. light up when you talk about that like. nothing else we've talked about. Yeah, it's Yeah, it is. Uh it's. everything. It's it's again I'm focusing. my energy on all the positive stuff, you. know, because and I because I can't I'm. too sensitive to deal with the the the. hardships that they go through. So, let.

me just be a a a guide a guiding light. for them or or someone to laugh on. They. sign my t-shirts, whatever they want to. do. I don't care. I'm their I'm their. playground. Um I I love it, man. Again, I think it's it's I think it's the. reason why I came back, Joe. That's. incredible. Well, you could see that it. means so much to you. Yeah. And that's. just if you could find something like. that in life, you're a winner. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, just that you'll think of. the the amount of positive energy you.

put out there in the world. Yeah. That's. it's pretty exponential to also it. cascades. Yeah. Yeah. The ripple effect. of that Yeah. is insane. Change their. life. They'll change other people's. lives. Yeah. And then comes back. It's. it's it's pretty what you put out in the. world is what you get back, you know. Yeah. I I see it every day and it's. exponential, especially now since the. incident. Yeah. The ripple effect of. just Dude, this happened in my driveway. It's a private experience. I woke up and.

it was a global thing. I didn't ask for. that. I'm so kind of glad it did. It. allowed people to see me as the man that. I am and not the guy that slings an. arrow, right? You know what I mean? It's a fake era because it's CGI, right? You know, so that so I'm glad it became. a a big public thing, but you know, the. ripple effect of of just that this. narrative of the recovery. is like you said, it can affect a lot of. people and it's a beautiful thing. It's.

a positive thing and um like the. foundation and I see it and feel it. every day. You really lead an exemplary. life, my friend. Well, you really do. What's what's the alternative? I know. But I mean, it's interesting. that you have this perspective. Like I'm. I'm always curious that people that have. such an amazing perspective like how did. you gain it? Like how did you get to. this place? Yeah. Well, I mean you have. to I think you have to life and review, right? Yeah. You know, it's a life in.

review. I think there's I think you know. there's birth order, right? is also. being in the 70s in the small town where. I was a Latchki kid, right? You didn't I. I had free reign. I was seven years old. and a key to the house and didn't have. to come home to the street lights came. on. Right. Me, too. No, I Yeah, I made. mistakes. Yeah. I broke windows and. slingshots and stole [ __ ] and light up. the cigarette butt and my my mom's and. all this stuff and I got caught and. sometimes I learned I reprimand myself.

I self-p policed myself. Um, I was a. very honest kid. Uh, you know, I had. there's a lot lot of lot of things, you. know, I had I had a bicycle and then. that was like freedom. That's what I I. be like, "Oh, I have real freedom." I. grabbed a fishing pole, got on my bike, and just went off into another county. Yeah. Like that wouldn't happen today. I. would never allow my daughter. walk across the street. I had similar. life. I was a Latchki kid, too. And I. just think the whole Where was this?

Well, I lived all over the place, but I. lived when I was 7 to 11, I lived in San. Francisco. From 11 to 13, I lived in. Florida. From 13 till 24, I lived in. Boston. Oh, wow. Then New York and out. here. Oh, wow. And well, LA, rather, and. then out here last five years. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I lived all over the place. Yeah, that's a good mix, right? Well, the good thing about living in a bunch. of different places, the bad thing is I. never really developed roots, right? And. but I had to form my own opinions.

because I couldn't count on the opinions. of all the people around me. I didn't I. didn't have like a core group of. friends. So I always had to like sort of. see the world for what it was. Yeah. Did. that make you an introvert or an. extrovert or both? I think I was an. introvert initially. I don't think I. ever even though I talk for a living and. I'm a public figure, I'm not really an. extrovert which is really odd. Like I. don't really like attention, which. sounds crazy for someone who gets a lot.

of attention. I don't need it, you know, which is probably why I get it for in. some strange Yeah. some strange like I. was very socially anxious when I was a. kid. Like I I would get super nervous. when I had to talk to a bank teller. I. remember one time I had to deposit money. in a bank and I was like, why am I. freaking out like this? This is so. weird, right? you know, um, but. eventually overcame all that stuff and. then, you know, through martial arts. through traveling around all throughout.

my youth from the time I was 15 till I. was 22. It's all I did was travel around. the country and competing. So, I had a. very bizarre life in that. I didn't have. like the normal high school life of. partying and hanging out. No, I was, you. know, flying to California to fight, right? And it was weird. It was a very. weird life, you know. So, I, you know, I did, I still wasn't an. extrovert. Like, I didn't really learn.

how to talk in groups of people till I. started teaching. So, I started teaching. martial arts and then that's how I. learned how to public speak, but I was. publicly speaking about something that I. was very good at. So it was like I. commanded sort of attention just by. because I would demonstrate to them. things that I was doing and then in in. demonstrating and talking it made sense. that I was able to talk about something. you knew very well and you're. comfortable in. Yeah. You know it's like.

I was really good at it so I could show. them like I'm going to demonstrate. something to you and then I' I'd do it. and they'd be like holy [ __ ] I'd be. like I'm going to show you how to do. this. Yeah. And then if you listen to. me, like I I taught at Boston University. and um when I was 19 and it was a real. counted towards your GPA, it was like. pass fail A. And I'd say all you have to. do is show up and try and you get an A. And if you can't show up, call me, tell. me you can't make it and you'll be fine. If you [ __ ] off, I'm going to fail you.

But if you just try, you get an A. And. then it counts towards your GPA. This is. like a legit thing. Yeah. I go all I. want you to do is like this can help. your life and I'm not thinking you're. going to go and fight and compete but I. can teach you something here. Yeah. And. it's difficult but you'll get better at. it. And through getting better at it. you'll learn how to get better at other. things. The discipline and Yeah. It's. great. So that's like how I got into. comedy in the oddest way like learning. how to talk to people like because I. wasn't comfortable talking to people. I.

always felt like a loser and a weirdo. and I always felt like an outcast. Yeah. So for to learn how to talk publicly. like that's how I did you know but all. that traveling around just gave me this. very bizarre like rootless sense of who. I was as a person. Is there anything. that you grab that from from that. experience that you hold on to? I mean. like to you know from there some. positive things that kind of come out. from that. Right. Like I I like I went to a different.

school every year of my life, at least. until I got to high school. But I was in. the same town. I didn't move around a. lot. Maybe just in the town I did. divorce and all that sort of stuff or. schools were full or whatever it was. So. I had to either engage with people all. brand new people each grade, new school, new grade. Yeah. And then you know, you're growing up. I I was I was more. shy and I think more like you, like an. introvert. And so either I either was. very gregarious or I just was an. observer and Right. I just watched. So. you just make choices and um that's why.

I became an observer. But with that uh I. don't know I I like I like that part of. me and I can be extroverted like I'm an. actor in a thing but I'm still more. insular and quiet and. even though the two quiet guys are. yapping their jaws off for hours. Well I. mean you it was hard but I wouldn't have. wanted it any other way. Yeah, because I. think it made me different, you know, and I think there's unfortunately if you.

are in like a small town and you you. grow up in that town and you never leave. that town, your perspective is very. limited. Yeah. Yeah. And I moved around. a lot and I think that was very. uncomfortable. I hated it when I was a. kid. Like, [ __ ] we're moving again to. another state. Like, this is crazy. But. that made me who I am. It and it again. it made me form my own opinions instead. of adopting a conglomeration of opinions. that everybody around me had, you know,

and I I went from very liberal and. progressive San Francisco in the 1970s. during the Vietnam War to living in. Florida where it was like completely the. opposite, like super conservative and. kind of [ __ ] And I remember just. being around people like why do they. even why do they even think like this? Like this is crazy. It was so strange to. me to have this like complete. juxtiposition almost like a cultural. 180. But it also made me realize like. wow there's a lot of different ways to. think. There's a lot of different ways.

to engage with life. Yeah. you know. Well, is it don't we like especially. growing up right because you're saying. like seven 8 13 14 all those years we. those we look to our friends and. friendship groups to sort of like kind. of help develop ourselves and right kind. of be a reflection upon ourselves and if. you don't have it you have other things. that you you know you turn to but you. know there could like you said it could. have been a terrible thing if you stayed. in the same place and you had the same. core four dudes and then how limited.

your life would have been to staying in. San Fran or you know so it could it's. Like you said, there's a real good. positive thing to take from being. removed from stability, removed from. right that's all anxietyinducing and or. it could be perspective, right? The. perspective could be if it's a positive. perspective, you know, to lean on Yeah. Like you said, I like how I came in a. thing and it drove you into all the the. things that you probably like about. yourself today. I think it's pretty. interesting. Yeah. And it also like I. got picked on a lot too, which that's.

what drove me into martial arts. Yeah. Boston. Yeah. I was like, I hate being. scared of people. It just drove me nuts. I didn't have friends. So, like a group. of guys would [ __ ] with me and I didn't. know what to do. So, I was like, "Okay, I got to fix this." And so, I became. obsessed with martial arts. And then. once I started doing that, it was like. the first thing that I ever did. I was. like, "Hey, I don't think I'm a loser. I. just think I never figured out how to. get good at something." And now that I'm. really good at this one thing, I'm like. the opposite of a loser. And then I.

became obsessed with winning, you know? And then that was like my whole life. until I was like, I don't think I want. to do this anymore. And then I, you. know, transitioned to other things. But. that period of time wouldn't have. happened if I lived in a comfortable. environment where I wasn't [ __ ] with. where I didn't get bullied. You know, I. wouldn't have that desire to like do. something that was completely terrifying. because I was scared of physical. confrontation. So what do I do? spend my.

whole life gv involved in like voluntary. physical confrontation with trained. fighters, right? Which is way more. terrifying, right? The most terrifying. thing, you know, was, you know, but that. Well, what's the alternative? Oh, just. be scared and be bullied and beat the. [ __ ] up or That's why I had to decide, you know, take the reigns. I had to. decide that. I just had to make this. change, you know. Yeah. Fortunately, it. worked out. Yeah. It's very bizarre the.

turns that life takes and when you look. back you're like what if that hadn't. happened? What if I hadn't done this? What if I hadn't What if I hadn't turned. left instead? Yeah. The crossroads are. so so instrumental in who we become, right? And what and in control of that. like we're not steering any ship at that. point, right? No. So much of it is luck. or whatever it is or fate. Whatever fate. means. Yeah. You know what I mean? Fate. is kind of assumed once an outcome has. been achieved. Oh, it was fate. Yeah. In. hindsight. Was it really? In hindsight,

you could say that. Yeah. I'm not sure. To say that in the moment, right? I do. think there's there's a certain power to. following instincts, which I've always. done for whatever reason. You know, there's a there's a pull that you have. towards a certain direction, even if. it's like massively uncomfortable. Like. sometimes you have to realize. like, okay, let's go. Like this is what. I'm supposed to do. And that that is. very hard to do. But once you do it a. few times and then you start saying. there, there's a little voice in your.

head like that motherfucker's never let. me down. I'm gonna keep serving that. voice. Whatever that voice is, I'm gonna. I'm keep listening. Even though people. are like, "What are you doing?" And I'm. like, "H. I'm not gonna listen to you." I hear. that a lot. Yeah. I think so do a lot of people that have. accomplished great things. Yeah. I don't. think anybody who listens to the advice. of everyone around them ever steps out. of line. Yeah. You know, I think you I. don't think you ever really try anything. crazy. Yeah. Exactly. cuz most people aren't going to want to.

support you when you're trying something. that seems insane. Whether it's trying. to be a movie star or whatever it is, trying to be a martial artist or a rock. star or anything in life that's hard to. do. Most people are going to tell you. don't do that. Especially people that. are conservative in conservative in a. sense of like do something that is going. to give you a a good chance of success. Yeah. Because the more fun things are. very open-ended. They don't really have. a lot of su like what are the what's.

what are the numbers of people that. become successful actors? Oh, I mean. it's is it like a tenth of a percent? Is. it that? It's probably not even that. Yeah, probably not even that. It's. probably less than that. I mean, if you. could like get a chart of like how many. people move to Los Angeles to try to. make it in show business and how many. make it? It's got to be an astronaut. And the numbers The numbers are not. good. Insane. Those numbers have to be insane. Yeah, but my thought was like, [ __ ]. somebody's doing it. Like, somebody did.

it. Like, why can't I do it? And then. people would say, you're not, you know, with the odds you're going to make it. Like, I don't know. Why am I thinking. about that? Someone, it can be done. People have done it. Like, you got to. But you have to be willing to just. really [ __ ] throw yourself into. something. Yeah. and know that. especially in the beginning, there's no. time to [ __ ] off here. If you really. want to do something that's really hard. to do, like you got to be all in cuz.

there's too many people that are all in. and you're competing with them. You're. not competing with these like half. steppers, these people that are kind of. dipping in and dipping out. They're. they're there as an example for you to. not live your life. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, isn't there like a kind of a. selective hearing that kind of has to. happen in in anything for anyone? We. have to listen and really listen to. engage and really listen to. learn and grow. Yeah. But then we have. to have selective listening to like how. many times I was told no or told I was. told I was crazy or told like what are.

you doing? You out of your mind? I'm. like now I was on I knew I'm on the. right track when I hear that. Because. that's that's the that's the words of a. fearful person. Those those are those. are those are the words uttered from. someone who's scared and not courageous. and a lot of stuff's in their way. I'm. on the right track. You know, there are those people that. would try to sabotage you because they. don't want you to be successful because. they haven't taken a chance in their. life. So, they don't want anybody who. does who's courageous to they want you. to fail. There's people out there that.

want people that are courageous to fall. apart because then it makes them feel. better for their own choices. Yeah. It's. okay. That's they got they got to live. with that. I I don't. Right. Right. They. got to swim in that. I don't. Again, I I. think that those things are just like. you need the rain to appreciate the sun. Yeah. You know, you need to struggle to. appreciate. They they have to coexist. otherwise they don't exist. Right. It's. like a truth and a lie. They both have. to exist otherwise everything's just. [ __ ] true. Right. Right. Right. So. that you have to coexist together.

otherwise you don't. That's the hardest. part of life to truly understand. Like. why is there evil? Because you need. love. You need good. Like why why do why. can't everything be love? Well, it. can't. It can't. There has to be evil. people for you to appreciate loving. people, you know. There really has to be. kind people for you to, you know, to. appreciate. Oh, okay. Life is not just. all cruelty. And but you have to know. that cruelty exists for you to.

appreciate kindness. Yeah. Yeah. Weird. Yeah. It's a weird dance. And it's it's. it's strange. Yeah. Like if God is real, like what a strange game he's playing, but you can kind of when it all works. out, you see wisdom in it, you know? You. like I kind of get it. Yeah. Like the. life is not just utopia. It's a strange. mix of good and evil. Yeah. And and and. love and hate and and all these things.

that are in the way that those tests, man, those tests, don't they suck? They. do. all the all the tests we have in our. lives and everybody has them. Everybody, there's nobody that's exempt from it. No, how much money, how successful, no h. you are all we're all susceptible to. great test and great suffering. Yeah. It's how well you overcome that. suffering uh will determine how well you. love and deeply you love in your life. And also the people that have overcome. the most are the most fascinating and. interesting and complex people, aren't.

they? Aren't they? Have you ever met. Amanda Knox? Do you know who she is? Yeah, I know she is. She's that woman. that was uh accused wrongly of a murder. in Italy. Yeah, I remember that. She. spent years in prison and in Italy and. she is so fascinating. She's so strong. and so interesting. And I asked her. about this. I was like, "Do you ever. think like you are this really unusual. person with this. like [ __ ] cast iron integrity and. character? Would you be this person if.

you hadn't been wrongly accused and. spent years in prison and publicly. persecuted and then eventually absolved? Like, who would you be? I mean, would. you want it any other way? I mean, I. don't Right. I wouldn't wish that on. anybody, but yet here you meet her. She's so incredible. It's like life is. very very odd. Yeah. And there's choices. that she could have made right in in. that. She could have been like.

resentful. I don't know how she is, so I. don't know. She's not at all. Yeah. But. like, you know, there's and she could. have been valid in any really kind of. feeling she has about things cuz that's. all sounds pretty shitty, right? You got. to and uh but you know, again, what's. the alternative? You you want to hold on. to resentment and that kind of is that. the life you want to live because it's. your choice, right? Or how I'd like [ __ ]. sounds like an interesting person to. talk about. But um you know is it a. choice? Is it a choice for her? Did she. feel like it was a choice? Like you know. certainly wasn't. Yeah. Did she feel.

like that that made her who she is and. she's content with that or I mean she's. she's certainly resigned to what it is. But she's very happy now, right? But not. just happy like complex like a complex. compassionate charitable thinker. What's. the What's the conversation if she's. still in the in the joint, you know? Oh. yeah. You know, I mean, she's still in. the clank and there's no hope of her. getting out. Well, she learned a lot in. there, too. I bet people like what the. the terrible choices that people make.

cuz most of the people that were in. there were guilty, you know, and that. and the terrible choices that these. people make and like what happened to. you when you were young like why did you. become a person who murdered your. husband? Why did you become a person. who, you know, robbed a bank? Why did. you what what what went wrong? You used. to be a baby. You know, this is just. something that I really um changed one. being a parent really changed my. perspecting of human beings in a very. profound way in many many profound ways,

but one of the biggest ones is I stopped. looking at people as being static. I. stopped looking at, oh, Jeremy's 54. He's always been 54. This is how I know. it. Now I look at everybody like, oh, you were a baby. You were a baby. Like. I, you know what I mean? Like, you know, I I love my daughters. dearly and they're very extraordinary. people, but it's been fascinating to. watch them as little babies become these. really complex human beings and have. conversations with them and talk to them. and see how they interface with life and.

and then I, you know, meet people who. are all [ __ ] up and, you know, angry. and [ __ ] hateful and res godamn what. happened? What what went wrong? Yeah. you know what are the things that and. how do you get out of this you know. it's interesting. it's you know well I mean it's. there's so many trials and tribulations. in this wonderful existence that we all. share and I think we learn a lot through.

other people's not just your own but. other people's yeah yeah for sure well. that's the hope anyway we can right. well I think a lot of people are going. to learn a lot through you and without. having to do it in a fearful way or. scare tactics or you know what I mean. that doesn't really work. Yeah. Yeah. But it's used everywhere in media and. right advertising and all that kind of. stuff, right? But like to do it in a in. an honest way or it's like I hope I. still learn by talking about my. experience, right? I still learn by.

looking through the book or listening to. the audio. I'll be listening to the. audio soon when I have my daughter and. all my nieces and nephews around. They're going to listen to it. We're all. going to listen to it together. because. I'm not going to have him go off reading. this thing. It's too harrowing to do it. alone. But like I'll be listening to it. and I'm going to learn through it and. but and with that experience and that. exchange with these beautiful young. creatures. Yeah. You know, um so you'll. be learning for so long. It's only been. a couple of years, which is really. crazy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I I'll keep.

keep trying and testing the the limits. of of my body and and my mind and my. spirit and what I can pass on to others, what I can give on to others, what they. they give me. I mean, it is a vibrant. high vi high high vibration that I'm. living right now and I. uh I'm so blessed to have it and so much. gratitude at every. breath. I almost feel like I don't have. to walk anymore. I sort of live it. I. just feel so.

lucky. And um I think it's has to do. with. uh all the love and all the all the the. the goodness that this world has to. offer. I think that's it's gotten me. through and the the attitude of it that. perspective of that because it can be a. very bleak dark place. Yeah. You know, but I I choose to I choose love. I. choose action. I choose.

um my perspective. It is my choice. And. um I I've been I've been in dark places. where it wasn't quite so positive and so. lovely. It's well before the accident, you know, where it's just like, you. know, just kind of grumbly and grumpy. and don't want to leave my house and, you know, I don't want to go sign. autograph. I don't want to be around. people or, you know, I'm just kind of. whatever, you know, not a really great. happy place perhaps, you know, like. everybody has the right to be, but if.

that doesn't exist this point, you know, I don't get any more bad days, Joe. That's amazing, right? You're like, "Fuck, I want that.". Isn't that incredible? I can gas up the. snow before you want. I can make it. happen for you. Isn't that incredible? No more bad days, brother. Right. Wow. It's a it's a perspective that is mine. and a truth and a reality that is mine. because I have a barometer to like yeah. I know what a bad day is actually like. and I was tested to my limits and I got. through it luckily somehow someway and.

uh it's it's a it's just a almost. science at this point. It's a factual. that it's just not going to happen. I. can't no matter if I tried so hard to. have a bad day. It's just not going to. happen. Yeah, I can have a bad moment. I. can have, you know, frustrating times, but it's not I'm just not going to have. a bad day and for the rest of my. experience here on Earth. That's. amazing. And I think that experience, this this perspective that you're. sharing is contagious. I think so too, dude. Yeah, I know. Actually, I know. So, I know so. Yeah. For too. For a. fact. It's it's it's a it's sort of make.

manifestation of what your existence is. You want it to be. Yeah. And you can do. it. Yeah. But you got to believe it. You. got to do it. Yeah. both those things. And I think that's why it's beautiful. that you wrote this book. Yeah. My next breath. Yes, sir. Um, thank you, Jeremy. It was awesome. I. really Yeah, I really appreciate you. Appreciate talking. Likewise, brother. You uh you make me happy, man. You bring. out a lot of good stuff in me. You. reaffirm a lot of of of good things in. me in a really really meaningful way and.

I appreciate you. I appreciate you, too. Thank you. This is a lot of fun. Yes, sir. Thank you. I'll see you at the. UFC's too, man. Absolutely. Okay. Go buy. this book, folks. Yes, sir. Bye, brother. Bye-bye. [Applause]. [Music].