Joe Rogan Experience #2305 - Rich Vos

Joe Rogan podcast. Check it out. The Joe. Rogan Experience. Train by day. Joe. Rogan podcast by night. All day. Let's. go. How are you, fella? Good to see you. Dude, you're [ __ ] dripping with. diamonds, sir. What's going on? The. road's been good to you. Look at you. I'm just so empty inside. This This. fills the hole for like like it's like, you know, you go by, you're like, "Oh.". And then you get home, you go, I hate my.

life. I hate my insides and no. spirituality, but I get to look at my. just emptiness on, you know, with rapper. diamonds. I've ran out of I've ran out. of [ __ ] to buy. So like there's nothing. like What kind of car are you driving? Alex Lexus IS- 350. Oh, those are fun. It's nice. That's a good car. Bulletproof. Never going to break. And. it's so fast and it's, you know, it's. But this is how [ __ ] it. Okay, so the. two Okay, I had the uh Lexus 350, right?

Or whatever. I went and I had it for. seven months, maybe. I went in to get it. serviced and I was kind of depressed, so. I bought a different car. I said, I go, this is not this is [ __ ] up. So, I. bought the IS- 350. I had the other car. for seven [ __ ] months. I go, you know. what? That one looks cool. So, I bought. that and then I went in to get it uh.

that service and it was the exact same. car a year later, but I like the newer. color, the newer gray. Oh, that gray. that whatever weird gray, like a slate. gray. Yeah. It's like it looks good. I. said, "You know what? [ __ ] Give me this. car." So, I He keeps swapping them out. They must love you. Yeah. They [ __ ] I'm. such a mooch. On one one year of my. wife's birthday, I bought myself a new. car. On her birthday, I bought a BM on. her birthday. But happy birthday. We.

could drive around in this. Oh my god. That probably played off well. A. [ __ ] I buy her cars. I just So, you. know, uh. I get bored easy. I get bored easy. And. it's because of, you know, in. life, in. life really, like I see some of my. friends doing arenas, doing this, doing. that, but I have enough. I really have.

enough, but it's not enough. Do you know. what I'm saying? Does that make sense? Yeah. I I one I think for my care, not. for my personal life. My personal life, I got three [ __ ] great daughters. two. uh three grandkids, another one on the. way. My seven-year-old is gonna go to. college, has pick of all kinds of. schools, you know, good schools. I. [ __ ] in 11th grade, I raised my hand.

to go to the bathroom and I never came. back. I just walked out like I'm a. [ __ ] idiot, you know? Uh my past and. my kids all grew up. Okay, the old one. married a black guy, but he's. light-skinned. Anyhow, the prettiest. baby on the planet. So, I have enough. But when it comes to career as a comic. and you. know there's I one more [ __ ] thing. Just one more thing. You know what I'm. saying? I do know what you're saying. Uh.

I don't know. I don't know what it is. You know, I've had specials. Not. Netflix, but it's always the It's like. I'm always doing the other club, right? You know what I'm saying? I'm always and. I'm. very blessed and and I love what I've. achieved in this business, but it seems. like it's always like. uh okay, I got a special on Amazon now, but it's not it wasn't Amazon didn't buy.

it. We placed it on. You know what I'm. saying? So, it's always there's always. one little thing when every pilot my. wife and I have had together or I've had. gets this close to getting picked up. You know, like I've heard some of the. nos I've heard, they almost sounded like. yeses. They were such good nos. I walked. out and go, that was the best no today. That [ __ ] no almost felt like a yes. So, in this business, do you think you. put something in your mind to make all.

these things kind of fall short? Have. you ever thought of that? Yeah. Well, that's what my wife says. Yeah. Do you. ever you ever thought that like maybe. the way you interface with the world is. like your. expectations are tempered like in a way. where you almost want to fail because. it's more comforting that it happened. again rather than this new thing of. success which is going to force you to. really focus and work harder to get more. success. And it's a lot of pressure. And. then you think about all the times you.

[ __ ] up before and you don't want to. hear you don't want to hear no again. You don't want to hear it, but you feel. like it's coming and you almost make it. come. Well, I get that in life growing. up from my childhood through drug. addiction. I became comfortable being. uncomfortable. That was my life. Comfortable being in the skids, being. Yeah. This was what I was used to in. this.

business. I don't I don't really ever. set myself up for failure. I mean, I. produce I come up with albums. I unstate. I'm always coming up with new material. and I got seven albums. I I'll probably. make an eighth album, which is a pretty. It's a lot for a career, I would. imagine. Yeah, it's great. Uh I don't go. into clubs and drink. I don't uh hit on. waitresses, you know, so I don't know. But my wife says the exact same thing.

you're saying. My wife said to me. once, she said, because I have this. power of thinking, like when I think. really hard, it comes to me [ __ ] right? Mhm. And my wife goes, "If you think you. uh deserve a million dollars, this was. you'll get a million dollars.". And I said, "God gives you what you. need, not what you want." And then she. said, "Do you think Chelsea Handler. needed a TV show?" So she kind of like.

debunked my whole need, you know, and. want thing. Uh. I I if you believe in some kind. of power greater than you or spiritual. I'm not religious by any. [ __ ] but I [ __ ] comes to me. I don't. think I uh. [ __ ] uh screw things up. I don't. screw things up like you know in. meetings or when we do pilots or.

whatever. I I do what I'm supposed to. do. So I don't know. I mean in comedy, yeah, for years I might been a little. aggressive on stage or, you know, a. little. whatever, you know, uh I think everything now, especially. now with clubs or whatever, it's all. numbers. They don't give a [ __ ] if you. light the weight staff on fire. If you. sold out the room, they Oh, great. You. were fabulous. You know, I was I was.

working catch years ago. I was at catch. and Bill Hicks. Okay, so David Brener's. on stage and this is they love David. Brener. He's killing killing. It was. during the peak of David. Brener. He gets off Bill W. Bill Hicks. goes up and he says, "Growing up as a. kid, I would see Robert Klein and David. Brener and I figure if Date could do it, I could do it." That was his opening. So. now he's doing his bit about Nancy.

Reagan, a skinny whatever, and calling. her the anti. I mean, people are running. out the door. They're running out the. door. And then he gets off stage and he. he says to me, he goes, "What went. wrong?". But I swear to God, he goes, "What was. he serious?" Yes. Or was he joking. around? No, he was he he was whatever he. was building. I don't know. It's hard to. tell with him. Yeah. But anyhow, the the. manager or Booker now after the said to.

him, you can come to do a spot here. anytime you want because he was Bill. Hicks. Do you see what I'm saying? He. was Bill Hicks. You know, I worked with. him in Texas. So, when I first started and I'm. watching him, you know, uh, and we'll get back on track. I'm sorry. to go off on these things. Go wherever. you want to go. So, we're working in. Texas. He he just breaks up. His. girlfriend breaks up with him at the. time. It's a true story. So, he goes,

"Uh, where can you get a hooker? A. prostitute." And a cab driver. I like. how you got to clarify. Yeah, I know. That's, you know, there's a lot of these. young kids now that listen. Okay. Hooker. A prostitute. Okay. Uh, so the cab driver takes him to one. house because they would take you to the. and and I go with him. He goes, "Take a. ride." So then we go to one house. She. knocks on the door and she opens the.

door and goes, "You're a cop." And. slammed the door on him. Slam. He was. young. Slam the door in his face. He looks like a cop. Then he went, but. he also the next place the cab driver. took him, she opened the door, goes, "You're too young." and slammed the door. on him. Oh my god. The next night he did. 10 minutes or whatever on how he can't. get can't can't pick up a prostitute in. Lick, Texas. And it I go, I'll never be. this funny as long as I [ __ ] live.

Like I've watched people going amazing. uh you know and uh then I was running. then with Bastile. That's when I was. running with Bast Frankie Bastile. Yeah. He So he I'll tell you story. I think I. told you this story. I've told this. story and it's been told, but I don't. know if I told it last years ago when I. did this and then I'll get back to I'm. I'm not uh self-sabotaging. That's what. you were getting to in my head. Am I. self-sabotaging? Not not.

self-sabotaging. I don't think it's a. self-sabotage thing. It's a not. understanding the energy that you're. putting out there and being accustomed. to a certain result. Okay. If you're. accustomed to missing your playing pool, you're accustomed to missing the. nineball, you're going to you're going. to miss that [ __ ] nineball every. time. Well, it happens in golf, too. Yeah, I'm sure it happens. Same thing. You got to. um reset the way you think about things. And if there's something that's eating. away at you, that bothers you, that.

occupies your thoughts, you have to. figure out what that is and clean that. up. Because that's that's a big part of. the problem with a lot of people. A lot. of the problem with a lot of people is. maybe they don't like something about. themselves. They don't like what they've. done. They don't like, you know, choices. they've made. And that's in your head. all the time. like you you're you know. the lack of clarity, the lack of peace. is in your head all the time. And you. know, it's not e this is not an easy. thing. I'm saying I'm not I'm not saying. this is like, okay, here's the real.

formula. Just go out, follow these three. steps, and you're going to be rich and. famous. No, it's not that. It's just. that success generally happens when. you've got as many pieces as possible in. order correctly. And failure generally. happens when you're overwhelmed by too. many things that are not working right. and you your your your attention and. your focus is on them. You're divided.

You know, a lot of times you see it's. like a terrible relationship. I I've. known a lot of really talented people. that sabotage themselves with a terrible. relationship and they think somehow or. another that this is just how. relationships are and this and they're. terrible in that relationship like and. then they can never be who they could. be. They can never reach their full. potential cuz they're always burdened. down by these [ __ ] squables they're. having with their girlfriend or their. boyfriend. You know, it's that's also.

too a a god thing where you think I. could fix this person or I could sure. change him. No one can change. That's. Brian Ken. He went Brian Ken his whole. life. I I would tell him get out now. I. would I would meet his girlfriend. I'd. be like get out now. I met a girl one. girl that he dated. I literally within 5. seconds of saying hello to her. I go. come here. I pulled him aside. Cut to. Okay. He doesn't listen. You know later. that night like she's drinking wine. She's [ __ ] hammered. It's a disaster. Like she winds up living with him.

Eventually figures it out. Gets rid of. her. Couple years later, he's walking. down the street on Sunset and she's. street walking. No. Yes. Girly was. living with at one point in time. This. is Brian Ken. He's he like he felt. abandoned when he was young. And so he I. I believe I'm speaking for him. Um and. so he's try he's a sweet guy and he. tries to reach out and fix people. Well, here's my Brian Ken story. It's very. funny. I was middling for him at uh.

Caroline's, which will never happen. again because Carolines is close. Uh I'm. middling for him. So I get off stage and. I'm single. This [ __ ] smoking hot. girl comes up to me and she goes, "Come. on, let's. leave. right now." I go, "No, I got to sell my. DVDs or C CDs. I have to sell my DVDs or. CDs after the show. I'm sitting there. selling CDs and I see Brian walk out.

with her right past me up the stairs. I. [ __ ] up. But maybe I didn't. Who. knows? Well, you definitely didn't cuz. Bonnie's awesome. No, I wasn't. Worked. out for you in the long run. But it's. Yeah, you definitely should have left. with her. No, I shouldn't have because. that's where that in life is where I was. supposed to be at that time when I was. there. Okay, I see what you're saying. You know what I mean? You're correct. Anything else could happen. What if it. What if she's a nightmare and then you.

miss out on whatever 400 500 bucks you. would have made selling DVDs? Oh, I. didn't make that much. I never. 100 even 100, you know. I went to a nice. restaurant and eat, you know, who knows? Who knows? uh you know it's this whole. negative thing with. my and this isn't ego by any stretch. when I say stuff like this. and.

I've and my wife said I I know I've. earned respect from my peers. I know it. because I've done it from from white to. black comics black comics that most. white comics don't even know. You know. what I mean? You know, well, you did a. lot of those roses back in the day. I. did. Yeah. I And all those TV shows. I. did them all. Yep. You know, uh, please. I started black comedy. So, okay. You. can only hold a white man down so long. So, and and like I think in.

life I'm more about respect than. accomplishment. You see what I'm saying? So, you you're more about the respect. from your peers. Not only my peers, the. industry, too, though. The industry. doesn't know, like say some club owner, let's say a club owner, they're not. sitting in the room watching your shows. All they care about are the [ __ ]. numbers that come in. They don't I had a. club owner once, I said to him, and. you're lucky you're way out of that. But.

I'm still I'm in that. So, I said to a. club owner once, he goes I said, "Look, I'm as funny as I've ever been right now. in life." He goes, "That doesn't [ __ ]. matter. What does that matter?" And it's. all a quick fix, you know, right? They. just want to sell tickets. Sell ticket. And I get it. They got to keep the doors. open. But that's the weird marriage. between the club owner and the comic. You know, I used to tell comics, you know, we're not Every comic feels. like they're battling it with club. owners. Like the club owner's never. giving them enough money. The club. owners [ __ ] them over. Lied about it.

being sold out. It was definitely sold. out. I want my bonus. That kind of [ __ ]. Yeah. You don't want to be a club owner. You don't. You don't. I mean I I I give. that advice then I became one but just. by necessity but I was like this is an. important relationship like you got to. be nice to them and so they respect you. and you should because everybody in the. beginning you feel like you're ignored. by them but that's it's a weird thing. because they're just in the business of. comedy unless you get like like Brian. Dorfman and Zies he really loves comedy.

you know Wendy from from comedy works in. Denver I'll tell my Wendy story in a few. That be a good story. You'll like it. Okay. But but my point is it's like. Well, Cory and Rhode Island's one of the. best [ __ ] nicest guys on the planet. Rhode Islands. What's that one? Uh. Comedy Connection. Oh, yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Mark Mark and Rochester to me. De. James and Governors. The Comedy. Connection in Rhode Island's weird cuz. you're in a bank. It's I know. So they.

turn bank into a comedy bank. That's how. bad the market's doing. Well, that was. in the 80s they did that. That was when. I was a kid. It's such a He fixed the. whole thing up. The whole camera system. It's a great club. It was always a great. club. Plus, there's not a lot in Rhode. Island. So, when you go there, people. are so happy to see you. It's Yeah, it's. my, uh, and I'm not bad mouthing her, Wendy. I don't know her like this. So, uh, I. worked the club twice and the second. time I worked there was Halloween.

weekend. I mean, there was a guy in the. audience in blackface, whatever, you. know. So really? Yeah. This was I don't. know 10 15 years ago. I don't 10 15. years ago. 10 years ago. But wait a. second. So she she wasn't even there the. week. Okay. She tells my manager I did a. lot of crowd work. Whatever. Yeah. Well, so anyhow, this is so uh I'm working at. uh uh Syracuse Funny Bone and my middle.

very funny guy. I think he passed away. He was an older guy, really great show. writer. He's from Denver. He goes, "Oh, I do a podcast with Wendy." And he sees. that I'm closing. And I He goes, "I'll. talk to her." So I email Wendy and I go, "Hey, listen. Why don't we start from. scratch? Let bygones be. bygones. Start over. Whatever. Uh, you. know, I'd love to come back in." And she. doesn't get back to me. So, I write, "By.

your lack of response, it looks like you. want to move forward. Here are some. available dates." Right? And she she. doesn't get back to me again. Shocker. And I write, "Can I bring my own. middle? What do I care? What? It's. funny. I'm trying to be funny." So, she. was just upset that you did crowd work. That's it. No. Well, she was The numbers. were low. Probably it was Halloween. weekend, right? But I listen I work. enough and and you know I'm saying I'm. not bad mouthing any of these people cuz.

you badmouth you're the one who looks. bad. I'm not bad mouthing them. She's. got a business to run whatever she's got. to do just like any of them. They have a. business to run. If this is who they're. going to bring in to keep their doors. open, I'll always find [ __ ] work. I. don't care. You know what I'm saying? Yes. Uh, so and industry-wise, I mean, now it's a whole look, my wife is. killing it because she's a writer and a. comic and you know, she's writing. movies, she's punching out movies, she. wrote for the Golden Globes, you know,

she has different outlets. You want to. go? No. No, that's cool. Uh, ask. yourself this. Who has access to your. medical history? In theory, it's just. you and your doctor. But in reality, hundreds of shady companies called data. brokers are keeping tabs on every. symptom you Google, every treatment you. research, and every pre-existing. condition they think you might have. That's valuable intel for advertisers. and insurance companies who will take.

any excuse to raise your premiums. But. there's a way to get your privacy back, and that is with ExpressVPN. With. ExpressVPN, 100% of your online activity. is rerouted through secure encrypted. servers. This makes it impossible for. third parties to invade your privacy. ExpressVPN also hides your IP address, which is the number used to identify you. on the internet. Without your IP. address, data brokers can't use it to.

track and sell your activity. Plus, ExpressVPN is easy to use. It just takes. one click and it works on all your. devices, phones, tablets, desktops, even. TVs and on up to eight devices at the. same time. This is why ExpressVPN is the. number one rated VPN by the experts at. CNET and The Verge. And the best part, podcast listeners can get four extra. months of ExpressVPN for free at.

expressvpn.com/rogan or by tapping the. banner. And if you're watching on. YouTube, you can get your four free. months by scanning the QR code on screen. or by clicking the link in the. description. God, when I quit. cigarettes, I quit cigars cuz I was. scared I was going to start smoking it. You probably would. I probably would cuz. it would lead, you know. Yeah, you're. puffing on tobacco. You're going to want. to inhale it. That's why, you know, I. can't even put a dick in my mouth. because I'm scared. I understand. You. know that. So,

uh, uh, you know, she has different. outlets as a standup. I'm just a. standup. I'm a club comic. I love, you. know, I do theaters. I do whatever, but. I love doing, uh, I really like doing. clubs. So, it sounds like you're doing. exactly what you want to do. Yes. So, what the [ __ ] the problem? I don't. think there is a problem, but it's I. said just one more thing to put it over. the top. Do you know what I mean? One. more. Uh, you're never totally. satisfied, Rich Fost. Oh, that's a good. point. Yes, I'm a I'm an addict, you.

know. So, look, here's here's my [ __ ]. here's how [ __ ] up I am. How [ __ ] up. are you? I'm going to tell you right. now, son. And this is not in me. In the morning, I. drink my coffee. I sit at the table. Sounds like me. And I put a bird feeder. and I watch the birds feed. And it's. very relaxing watching them all come and. feed. It's very very relaxing. Okay. Now.

I have seven bird feeders around my. property cuz I figured well this will be. seven times more relaxing watching bird. chaos. No, but they're all over. I I. mean I got ones that I with a video. camera I could see who's coming. The. squirrel. I don't care if the squirrel. eats the, you know, but it's my. addictive personality, right? Where you. always want more. A little more. Yeah. Just a little more new car. Different. color. Same color. Yeah. One more ring. One more ring. I took I took two off.

Uh, you know, so it's and I I work on. myself. I go to meetings two, three a. week, you know. I I still after all. these years. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Do you. still feel the pole after all these. years? No. I have got gambling to fall. back on. I uh What are you gambling on? What am I gambling? Yeah. Well, I mean, once in a while I'll play on my phone at. night. Uh, slots. Oh, boy. Yeah, I did.

real well. Uh, you made money one. Yeah, last year. I I got to say slots on your. phone sounds like the dumbest [ __ ]. idea because there is no way it's not. fixed. At least a slot machine is. random. Well, slots in the casino is the. biggest sucker bet on the planet. The. biggest sucker. I'll play craps. If I'm. going to play, if I'm going to gamble on. a machine, I'm going play craps like a. man. You know what drives me [ __ ]. crazy? When I hear that someone hits the. slots and they won't give out, they. won't give the money cuz there's always.

there was an error with the machine. That's [ __ ] I've heard that many. times. Like, [ __ ] your error. Give that. guy his money. This is what I won last. year on slots. Let me see this. Really? Yeah. Really? Yeah. I got lucky. Two. jackpots. Wow. But now I keep playing. I. think I'll get more. I think I'll hit. the big one. Yeah. Well, that's how they. get you. Yeah. I mean, okay. I have a. friend who's very wealthy and is a. [ __ ] degenerate gamble. Dana White.

from the Oh, I see the videos. Degenerate. He's a nut. I was just. reading an article about Hunter Campbell. who's uh the financial officer was like. trying to talk to him just saying, "You're like, "You're killing me. Like, why are you doing this?" He loves it. Loves it. It's there's there's [ __ ] that goes off. in your head. Even even when you lose, you're like I mean I. makes you feel like you're alive. Something's happening. I was in.

Vegas and I walked to the table with 300. bucks crap table and it's me and the. whole table is I mean I held the dice. for almost an hour. 300 I turned into. 5,000. The table's going nuts. I'm I'm. winning everybody formula and diapers at. the table. They're [ __ ] yelling cat. with a hat. And if it's just such a, you. know, and then for the rest of the week, I didn't gamble again because I go, I.

can't follow that. I'm not going to be. able to do that again. So, it's not. like I'm obsessed with it. Numbers I am. kind of, but you know, I've been to. casinos and worked for three, four days. and not even played. But what but when I. do it's like like me, my wife and I were. in Canada and we went to a casino. I go, "Well, let me go back to the hotel and. put some put my credit cards and money. there." And she goes, "You can't go into.

a casino with all your money and credit. cards." I go, "How does she ask that. question? She knows you." Yeah, I know. She should know you can't. She's [ __ ]. with you. She knows you can't. Yeah, but. she does. She should say, "Good for. you." Yeah, that's a good point. Yeah, she should say good for you. That's. smart. But she didn't know me when I was. an addict. Oh, she never saw me when I. was out there. Yeah, but I Well, I guess. I did. I knew you when you were an. addict. But yeah, but I you But you. cleaned up nice. You really did. You.

figured it out. Well, you really did. So, like she should she should know. that. Yeah. Not to go to the casino. That's what I'm trying to say. How about. that, Bonnie? You know what? That's what. I'm trying to say. I mean, we're now You. guys are one of the funniest couples of. all time, though. There's like a few. like Christina Pazinski and Tom Sigura, uh, Natasha Logger, Mosha Casher. There's a few like, you know, people say. like comics shouldn't date comics. Well, who else? I don't know about that cuz. sometimes it [ __ ] works really well.

What am I going to do? Come home to a. dentist? You know, and for me, you know, we, you know, we really come together. when we find the same enemy and the same. person we could trash. Uh, you know, or. we talk comedy, we make each other. laugh. Yeah. We fight and have all the. [ __ ] you know, or we're a married. couple. And your comics. Yeah. And we're. So to be So you're talking [ __ ] Well, to be to be a male comic, you got to be. [ __ ] up. to be a female comic. That's.

a whole another level of [ __ ] up. because, you know, they go on a road, they gota worry about. everything. Yeah. They got to worry. about fans attacking them, where they're. staying, what it's like, getting. stalked. Oh, yeah. It's horrible. And. thank you for saying we're funny. Yeah, we we're together. You guys are very. funny. It's like, you know, I always use. it as example cuz comics will say all. the time, don't date comics. And I'm. like, I don't know about that. I don't. know about that because like why not? I.

don't think you should never date blur. Although I stopped dating Italians when. I was 21. Oh yeah. Yeah. It's just like. the last one swung at me. I was like, I'm done. Well, I only date. As she was. swinging, I was like, I can't believe. she's swinging at me. That's hilar. Like. while this was happening, her arm was. pulling back. It was coming towards my. face. Like I can't [ __ ] believe this. is happening. Well, I only date Irish. Like, I can't afford a Jew broad. So, I. went I went [ __ ] Irish. I I'd rather.

go to [ __ ] Marshalls than Barney, you. know. Well, also like you probably Well, the thing about Jewish women, the the. stereotype is that they're very. controlling. They're, you know, it's. like a how the mom is. You know, it's. like you take that role of like the mom. of the house, then your wife becomes. your mom. That's the stereotype. Not. saying it's always that way. Very a little naggy. A little naggy, you. know. Yeah. And I mean, look, [ __ ]. Bonnie grew up on a farm killing.

chickens, you know. Perfect. She's. [ __ ] I She's good for the like when. the revelation comes. And not only that, I have running water. Uh, you know, they. had a [ __ ] They slept on the floor. She grew up like I do. Poor poor. And we. started dating. I mean, I was already in. the business for I don't know how many. years. I It's like they say, "Don't date. comics." Yeah. Well, if you're a new. comic and they're a new comic, it's. going to be competition the whole time. There's going to be jealousy. But I was.

already established and she was. established. Yeah. But it it doesn't. have to be. It doesn't have to be. It. could be, but it doesn't like these. these like hardfast rules, they don't. work. It all completely depends on the. individual. I mean, how different are. comics? Like how different are you to. Shane Gillis? How different am I to. Arafir? Like we're all different. Even. though we're all real good friends, we're all there's no hard rules. No, I luckily came up with the one of.

the strongest crews in New York. Oh, you. came up with an amazing [ __ ] Patrice. Patrice, Norton, Billy, Bobby, Colin, you know, Kev, little, you know, Kevin. Hart. It was amazing crew. you know, our. crew and you know them Bonnie Hump. Bro, I knew you back when you had Jerry. Curls. You knew me when I was doing. Robin Gibbons. bits. You knew. That's right. It was You. don't remember. You might remember. We.

were working a one nighter in Seaside, New Jersey. It was my ex-wife and me, you and her took a walk to the. boardwalk. We were in Seaside right on. the boardwalk and it was just me, you, and her. I think you just came down from. Boston and I don't think you were living. in New York. I think you were just doing. some shows, some one nighters and [ __ ]. And we did a one nighter. Uh, okay. I I. probably first it had to be I got 39.

years with her. Probably like 38 years. ago. I That doesn't even make sense. because I've been doing comedy for 30. Well, let me see. 88. 97 37 years. Okay. So then I Okay. I was. with Bonnie. So, yeah. I mean, Kelly. So, I had You're right. I had It had to. be like 1990 then. Yeah. I had like four. years clean. 90 was when I first started. coming to um New York. You were already. clean by then? Yeah. Yeah. So, and I was. already married. So, yeah. I I had 5.

years clean. So, it was maybe like 34. years ago, which could fall or 35. So. yeah, we're working a one nighter and I. I remember walking up the street, me, you and Bonnie. uh to uh to the boardwalk. I mean uh. Kelly Kelly to the boardwalk to the. boardwalk. And it was just some one. nighter and then I don't know if we ever. worked again together. Oh, well. Dangerfields we did some We did. Carolines together too. I remember doing.

Carolines with you. We did Oh, we did a. lot of Dangerfield shows together. You. remember Did we ever do prom shows. together? Yes. Oh, Jesus. And and those people should. know what prom shows are. So, New York. has a very weird thing where they take. kids from like Staten Island and. Brooklyn and they bring them in in. [ __ ] buses to Dangerfields. And the. show would run from like 700 p.m. till 5. in the morning. No break. No break. Just.

you would go one show and you get paid. by the show. It was like It was good. money. I forget what it was, but it was. like you get paid by like you can make a. couple grand in a night if you did the. whole night. So you would do stand up. from 7:00 p.m. to like 500 a.m. But. sometimes some of the shows were the. same some of the same crowd most of the. shows. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They didn't. move the people out. They just pushed. new kids in and they wanted you to do. the same jokes so that the kids would. leave. It's the best time to be a. basketball fan. All the thrills and.

playoff drama done sitting in the. sideline and ready to win some real. cash. Well, check out Pick Six from. DraftKings. When it comes to basketball. playoffs, DraftKings Pick Six posterizes. the competition, including prize picks. When you hit all your picks, you'll. score higher minimum payouts on pick six. than Flex Plays on prize picks. And best. of all, you'll win even more cash if you. outscore the competition. Track your. picks for a shot at huge cash prizes.

That's all there is to it. Pick Six is. available in most states, including. Missouri, California, Texas, Georgia, and more. Don't settle for a smaller. payout. Switch to Pick Six and cash in. your basketball knowledge. New players. get 50 in Pick Six credits instantly on. just a $5 entry. Basketball playoffs are. here. Cash in with Pick Six from. DraftKings. Download the DraftKings Pick. Six app now and use the code Rogan. That's code Rogan for new customers to. play. $5, get $50 in Pick Six credits.

Better payouts, bigger wins. Only with. Pick Six from DraftKings. The crown is. yours. Gambling problem? Call 1800. gambler. Help is available for problem. gambling. Call. 888-789777 or visit ccpg.org in. Connecticut. Must be 18 and over. Age. and eligibility restrictions vary by. jurisdiction. Pick six not available. everywhere including New York and. Ontario. Void were prohibited. One per. new customer. Bonus awarded as.

non-withdrawable Pix credits that expire. in 14 days. Limited time offer. See. terms at pickix.draftkings.com/promos. So we were doing proms at Dangerfields. and this is all young kids in, you know, getting ready to go to college and. Ronnie goes on. He walks on stage in a. robe drunk. He's not doing comedy. He's buming the. crap. He's talking about his divorce or. death. And all these kids are just.

they're all looking at him like the jury. from uh my cousin Vinnie when they were. looking at the stuttering lawyer. Their. eyes were just going, "What is going on. with this man?" Wow. Right. And he just. it was the most depress. And then I. think Brian Rean had to follow him and. and the fact I mean if you look at your. career and some of mine and Brian Rean. we were doing prom shows. Yeah. I did I. did a there was a contest at.

Rascals and I think the. winner got to do comedy on a plane. Right. That was back when they smoked on. planes. Yeah. And I think John Stewart. was one of the contestants. Like I. remember doing I remember doing some or. else it was a Johnny Walker competition. I was there. It was like me, John. Stewart, Jim Gaffigan, you know, to do. some Johnny Walker tour. I don't [ __ ].

know whatever the contest was, but it. was all these contests. But you would. see, look, I worked [ __ ] clubs. Oh, here. I I was working one club once and. after the show, it was in Scranton, PA. at a Holiday in me and another comic. After the show, the owner brings us in. the back room and pulls out a gigantic. bag of Coke and says, "Do you want Coke. or money?" And I took the Coke. And the.

guy who took the money is Adam Sandler. And look where he is. And look where I. am. Adam Sandler took the money. that. old [ __ ] he opened up. He was a. guitar comic and he opened up that was. that was a Nick's comedy stop thing. Coker money. Oh yeah, I worked in. Boston. Did they offer you Coker Money. back then? I don't and I was getting. high cuz when I first started comedy. somehow they uh uh what was his name? Uh. Dominic and Jackie Gateman or something. They liked me for some reason. I stunk.

But they would give me spots at Knicks. and I would get either money or but I. would buy Coke from Mike, the drug. dealer that the Colombians killed. He. was the coke dealer up there. I would. stay behind the connection at the Milner. Hotel, which was all prostitutes and. drug addicts, right? And you know, I. would go up there, Nicks was giving me. shows upstairs, downstairs. So the one. time, the last time I was up in Boston,

I did Springfield, Mass and Westfield, Mass. 252 Elm and some other Norm Leaf. [ __ ] And Norm Lefo, Western. Massachusetts. So then I went to Knicks. I go, I'm not. spending my money on drugs. I'm not this. I'm coming home with [ __ ] money, right? So, I'm working this place called Plums. in Worcester, and this waitress, oh, [ __ ] smoking hot. After the show, uh,

cuz I did some Coke, [ __ ] She goes, "You do Coke?" I go, "Yeah." I go, I go, I go, I go, "Do you do you know where I. can get any Coke?" And we couldn't get. any Coke in Boston. I'm not We drove. from Boston. I went back to New York, bought a bunch of crack. We got a hotel, smoked all night. I We had sex, this and. that. And it was Saturday night. And I'm. 40 minutes from home. And I have one.

more show in Boston on a Sunday. And I. have to drive her all the way back to. Boston. No money left. Maybe $10 or $20. just enough to get back to Boston. Do my. luggage in a [ __ ] paper bag. We stop. on the way up in Hartford. Uh we try to. buy coke or heroin and we got ripped. off. She's crying cuz she's going to. lose her job. [ __ ] blood started.

pouring out of my nose as we're driving. Just pouring out. I'm Oh, she lost. Christ. I swear to God. Right. Right. Well, and then she goes, "My sister. wants an ounce of Coke, so I was going. to set her up and and rip her off and, you know, oh boy, you know, get a free. ounce of Coke." Well, anyhow, two weeks later, I I end up in. rehab. That was my bottom. That [ __ ].

trip to Boston, I end up in rehab. And about a year or two later, I'm. working Fort Lauderdale and her sister's. there with her boyfriend who's the size. of a [ __ ] house. So if I did rip her. off, I would have gotten [ __ ] [ __ ]. killed beaten out of me, you know, what. are the odds? Uh, so that last trip to. Boston and I spent all the money I. wasn't going to spend, but this girl was. [ __ ] hot, you know? Then I I came out.

of. rehab and I think I had like a month or. two months clean and I'm working a. Daytona. Beach [ __ ] wait where I don't know I. was I had bad teeth [ __ ] Jerry curl. and my wife says this she saw videos of. me from R and she goes you're such a. mess but you had so much confidence and. girls like confidence right cuz I would. be on stage [ __ ] rotten teeth and. [ __ ] grease dripping out of my hair.

So, I [ __ ] mess. I look like a. [ __ ] rat. And uh this hot waitress in. Daytona, we go back to her place and I'm. making out with her and something tastes. funny. I go, "What?" And she pulls out a. bag of Coke and I had like a month. clean, two months. I go, "I can't do. that. I I got to get out of here. I. mean, I [ __ ] her, but then I left real. quick, you know." Uh, you know, and it. was scary. So, you never bounced back. You never went back to drugs. No. No. That's amazing. 39 years ago. That's.

incredible. You had one fall off and. you're like, I'm done. Well, I mean, here's for me now. And, you know, as the. years. accumulated, you know, I was I was. working. I was saving money. I was. buying, you know, if I went and got high. now, this watch alone would kill me. I. could porn this watch. It would be. enough money for me to die, right? you. know, money I've hidden around the. house, you know, no one's going to find. it. I uh don't even think, hey, we're.

going to go to Vos's house and find his. money. This [ __ ] is [ __ ] hidden. Well, all right. So, go [ __ ] yourselves. So, anyhow, I'll die. There's no Look, I for. a year and I got to get back on track. I. stopped. eating, not not keto, but cut back on. carbs, sugar, just I did real well for a. year. I mean, I was [ __ ] ripping up. again. And for my age, and it's harder.

to My daughter comes upstairs and goes, "Oh, I made homemade chocolate chip. cookies." I go, "Oh, give me one." Well, the seventh cookie I had to throw in the. garbage. The seventh one. I go, "I. can't. I gotta stop." So, that's how my. [ __ ] mind is. There's no there's no. one time. What the [ __ ] I play golf and. guys are drinking a beer. I go, what the. [ __ ] are you doing? We like the taste. [ __ ] off. Gatorade tastes good. You. drink to get drunk. What are you. drinking a beer? You know, and it's just.

And then on stage, if I quit, someone. goes, "Quit, shut the [ __ ] up. You're. here having wine coolers, [ __ ] Sell. your mother's car to get high. Go [ __ ]. yourself." You don't know anything about. getting high. You're fighting when. people aren't even here. I know. I'm. just telling you. Strange. You're in the shower arguing with these. guys. Do you know how many [ __ ]. arguments I've had? I thought you going. to bring in your whole pro Palestinian. crew that I was going to fight today,

which I have stuff printed out. We'll. read later. Uh, we'll read later. But it's so funny. You're having fights. with You don't ever lay in bed or argue. with have arguments with people that No, you've never had I did when I was young. Yeah, I figured that out when I was. younger. This is stupid. And when the. impulse comes, which it does, I just I. go, "This is stupid." I talk to myself. I just coach myself. Yeah. You got to.

have like another voice in your head. Yeah. But most people have one voice in. their head and that voice is like, "We. should go get high or we should do this, we should do." You have to have a second. voice. And the second voice is like, "What advice would I give me?" And the. advice I'd give me is like, you're. wasting your time arguing in the shower. with someone who doesn't even they don't. even know you're arguing with them. I. know it's true. You're not even there. You're like replaying it out in your. head. So, you could have had a better. thing to say to them. You're they're say. they're living rentree in your head. Yes, that's what it is. Yeah. I don't.

allow anybody in my head. No, I had the. second voice. I do. And I'm not. religious by any, but I'll say, you. know, God get me off. You know, what. should I do? What's my purpose? Or what. can I do in life? You know, look, my. main purpose in life besides being my. main purpose is staying sober because if. I don't, I'm dead easily and everything. I throw away. and my family obviously, you know, and my and my career, you.

know, all the [ __ ] I put about Israel, this and that. That's that's my life is. comedy. But I think in life if you're. not part of the like I say solution. you're part of the problem with what's. going on in this world with in this. mainly in this country the anti-semitism. in this country the anti-semitism in. this country is weird because it popped. up like it was hiding you know after. October 7th it popped up like it was. hiding like what where is this been here.

the whole time it was weird and I think. there's a lot of it in um on Twitter and. um these places that I think is not. human beings and that inspires human. beings to get bold. I think there's a. lot of it that's bots. There's a lot of. it that's bot. I see these I' I've like. when someone says something outrageous. on Twitter, I'll go to the account and. see like what what they're doing and. what and sometimes I go, "Oh, this isn't. a person." Like you you can figure it.

out after like a couple of pages. Like. this is not an actual person. This is a. person that jumps onto every. controversial subject and says something. insightful and they do it over and over. again. And you see it with abortion, you. see it with immigration, you see it with. voting, you see it with the rigged. elections. Like there was an FBI analyst. who uh took a look at Twitter before the. purchase and he said, "I think it's as. much as 80%. bots. I think we're getting played as a. civilization back and forth. I think.

we're getting I think so many people are. vulnerable to like following a. narrative. Well, and and and I I agree. See, and I've said. this and I believe in free speech. You. didn't I when we talked about this, you. didn't agree with it, but I I didn't. agree with free speech. No, no, no. What. I said about the internet that some. people in life use that pla shouldn't. have a platform in life because they're. they're nuts. They're nuts. Like if you.

had a someone in an audience that's. nuts, you're gonna you're gonna take. them out. You're gonna get rid of them, right? But that's the difference between. an audience and the internet is you. don't have to engage with the nuts. Okay? But there's people that are. following these nuts. Okay? You. take whatever's going on in the Middle. East, whatever whether whatever side. you're on, Israel, Palestine, whatever.

Why are college campuses. letting this happen on campus where Jews. can't go to class, where they're being. harassed, where they feel threatened? Well, a lot of that stuff is funded. Yeah, it's funded by Qatar or whatever, but or whatever, whoever whoever is. doing it. There's there's most certainly. there's funding and organization. involved. These aren't organic protests. that just pop up. No, of course. everybody wants to think they are. because some people join organically.

They hop in, but it's not. These are all. being organized. Including the anti-Elon. protests, including like, you know, the. the an end to oligarchy rallies that. they have with AOC and Bernie Sanders. All this [ __ ] is getting it's all. getting funded and astroturfed and. they're busting people in. They're. manufacturing a movement, of course. And. I mean, listen, they didn't all go out. and buy the same tents, right? you know, they, you know, it's and there's I don't. know how many that are getting funded.

and then they bring in, you know, it's. just like the tents are crazy. We're. going to camp out for Palestine. Okay. Yeah. It it's just like, you. know, I don't want to get into the 80s. and foreclosures on on farms, you know, well, the when banks were foreclosing on. farms, Jews were going, look, the Jews. are foreclosing on our farm. The Jewish. bankers, and they weren't even the.

bankers doing it. It was the Wasp. bankers. Jews barely worked at Chase. Manhattan in the early 80s or 70s. So, but they blame the Jews. But they blame. because it's easy to go after, you know, that. So throughout the. Midwest or the South, it's easier to. build up hatred or a group to go after a. smaller group going, "Hey, these people. are closing on your farms. These are the. people that are doing it, and these. people don't have the knowledge." And. the hate just grows and grows from.

generation to generation. Does that make. sense? So, you know, same with, you. know, the look, I got [ __ ] I printed out. is, you know, I'll show later maybe. I. don't know. I mean, listen, my I'm a. comic, but I I really, you see what I. post sometimes. I post some [ __ ] and. it's not I'm not anti. uh I'm not. anti I'm just pro is but I'm pro Jew. I'm pro-Jew in this country and I'm not.

religious by any stretch. I don't. [ __ ] It's I think it's a holiday now. Uh it's Passover or something. I don't. [ __ ] know. I'm not religious. My. cousins were. My family wasn't. But you. think about it as a people. I think. about it as Yes. as a people. You know, if what was happening in this world to. black people or gay people, these. colleges would put an end to it. It. would stop. All right. If if people were. ripping down posters of of hostages of. black hostages or gay hostages when that.

was. happening, it wouldn't happen. It. wouldn't. Yeah, that was crazy. You. know, that was crazy where people were. upset that people wanted people to bring. the hostages home. Like these hostages, some of them were aid workers. Yeah. Some of them were people that like lived. there so they could help people in Gaza. The whole thing is so crazy. But I I. wonder like how did they get turned that. way or were they like what I said like. they were in hiding? There was like. anti- see as a person who's not a Jew I.

would hear about all the anti-semitism. like yeah there's always going to be. some but maybe everyone's exaggerating. But then when this after October 7th it. was just like oh Jesus [ __ ]. everywhere. Are you are you what's your. background? Irish. Italian. Yeah. Mostly. one quarter Irish. Okay. If every. surrounding country. right Italy, they're going to fight back. by any means necessary. I 100%. I'm. going to show you. Can I show you some. stuff? Now, we don't have to do We can.

talk. I don't know. I got to do a little. of it. A little. Whatever you want. I. don't care. Do whatever you want. I'm. joking around. But yeah. No, I. understand. And I think that's also one. of the re things that people like my. wife should keep away. Go ahead. when. people get angry about Jews is because. they think that Jews always stick. together and they like Jews above all. else and then it's like [ __ ] those. people. You know, there's like that. walled garden approach, you know, if. what do you got there? You got a manila.

envelope like you're in [ __ ] court. Look at this. Relax. I'm a I come. charts. Yeah. Well, here did you bring. graphs? What's that first page? Is that. a photo of Israel? What is you got a. map? You brought maps. He brought sh He. brought maps for me. Look, look at this. This is the dumbest [ __ ] I've ever seen. from you to look at the dot. Look at the. size of Israel. Yeah, it's very small. Look at who they're surrounded by. Yeah, they're surrounded by a bunch of uh. Muslims. All right. Not a good spot to. be if you're Jew. So would they should.

have probably moved to a different spot. They should. It's like, you know, you. know what I mean? I got other better. stuff. I just start off with the weaker. stuff. If you're you're a black guy, you. move into a KKK neighborhood, that's. like you're gonna have problems. Yeah. I. mean, so it is kind of crazy. Wouldn't. you think by any means necessary they're. going to do what they [ __ ] have to do. to survive? Yes, I totally think they. would and I understand that aspect of. it. Is that your phone? Yeah, I got to. turn it off. Sorry. My wife I don't know.

how she got my number. Start the car. It is crazy when you look. at the map. It's not just that they're. surrounded, but they're surrounded by. everyone. It's all enormous countries. I. mean, look all the way up. It's. interesting. You go down Saudi Arabia, the end of it, you forget, oh, it's. Ethiopia's right there. And then I mean, Turkey hates Israel. [ __ ] Iran, you. know, they're being attacked by four or. five different nations at once. And.

everybody's going, "Well, uh, you know, the they're they're committing. genocide." First of all, those numbers. are coming out of, uh, coming from. Hamas. Where do you think those numbers. are coming from? Okay, but the drone. footage isn't coming from Ham. The drone. footage is real. Like if you you cover. like Gaza with a drone, there's nothing. left. It's pretty nuts. Well, I I bet. you if they released the hostages. October 10th, none of this [ __ ] would. have happened. That's true. None of this.

[ __ ] would have happened. During the. Clinton. administration, Arafat was in the White. House probably six or seven times. this. the head of the CIA during the Clinton. administration visited the White House. twice. Arafat six or seven times and. they offered a two-state solution. Clinton that that would have been. Clinton's legacy to have peace and a two. states but Arafat kept turning it down. because Arafat's a terrorist and if he.

does that what purpose does he serve? What purpose as he's is it that simple? Well, to me it is because I'm not the. smartest, but part of the problem part. of the problem with Israel in Palestine. and I've I've sat down and thought about. this conflict. Not that I'm an expert. either, but um it's almost. insurmountable. because it's been and then now after. October 7th with all the bombings and. what when they leveled Gaza, it's like. how do you fix this? It's like there's.

no there's you've you've created. whatever the numbers are. Yeah. it's. whether it's 70,000 people or 20,000. people that have been killed that are. innocents, you've created so many more. potential terrorists because so many of. the children of those people and the. brothers and sisters and relatives of. those people. So, it's like it's like. reinforced this desire to to fight. against Israel. But we, you know, and.

you could squash that. You could you. just keep pounding them down till. there's nothing left, which is what it. seems to that they're doing. But we and. I I understand it from a tactical. perspective, I guess. Do we have does. does do we have that animosity and. hatred from Japan towards us where we. dropped, you know, and killed 350,000. people? We I mean Well, they did for a. while. Yeah. But they certainly did for. a long while. Yeah. I had friends who'd.

go to Japan in the 70s and they said you. could feel the hatred. Yeah. But now. it's that's it's 55 years. Yeah. They're. not like that at all now. But it's a. totally completely different generation. So you think future generations will. think about Israel the same way we think. about Japan or Japan thinks about us? No. Because future uh generations in the. Middle East, this has been going since. day one. Since the Six Day War, since. the Yam Kippo War, since since day one,

they've been being attacked. So there's. never no they Well, it's also before. Israel was founded, you got to go back. to how they were being persecuted in. Europe. It was insane. There's a this. guy Daryl Cooper's lightning rod for. controversy, unfortunately. But he's a. he's got an amazing podcast and he's got. this series called Fear and Loathing in. the New Jerusalem. And it starts out. with the Jews being persecuted in in. Europe. and he takes you through what it. would been would been would been would. been like for those people and the gangs.

of people roaming down the streets, raping women, beating men to death in. the streets. And it's so crazy because. it's real. It happened. And it was these. people's neighbors. And you know, this. was why they got so many people to move. to Israel in the first place. Yeah. Because when they said, "Look, we're. setting up a state for for just for Jews. from all these Eastern European Jews.". They're like, "Okay, we're in." And they. moved. I mean, you know, and then you. have I mean, and they've also been there.

since Christ. I mean, they've been in. Israel, Jews, even before that, right? Yeah. A couple weeks. Uh, but I think it. it predates I mean, doesn't it predate. Jesus? Yeah. I mean, I I'm not his story. and this isn't my Let's find out. Let's. find out since we can. Um, what is the. earliest? Who were the what when did. Jews first settle the land that's now. known as. Israel? What it was? Judea back then, right? Like what what was it called?

What was it initially called? Miami. But. also like this is like you know this is. one of the reasons why it's this area is. so so contentious is because Christians. really believe that when Jesus comes. back that's where Jerusalem he's going. to come to back Jerusalem like are you. are you [ __ ] sure but here's here's. another thing too this and I'm not. listen I've wor I'm not going to be that. guy oh I had a Muslim for this Jews have. been a history in the land of Israel. their presence dating back to the second.

millennial. BCE. Okay. Settling in the area around. 1,250 BCE. So that's that predates Jesus. by,250 years. It's funny they call it before current. era. Like current era is not 2,000 years. ago. Just say before Jesus, you. [ __ ] That's what I say. Second. millennial B.C.E. the Israelites. considered to be the ancestors of the. Jewish people emerged as an outgrowth of. the southern Canaanites. The Israelites entered canon in 1250.

B.CE. Settling the hill country in the. south. 10th century B.C.E. two Israelite. kingdoms. Northern kingdom of Israel and. the southern kingdom of Judea emerged of. Judah rather emerged. Um the kingdom of. Israel was conquered by the Neo Assyrian. Empire in 722 B.C.E. And in 586 BC the. kingdom of Judah was conquered by the. Neoabylonian Empire. 538 BC the Persu uh. Persian Cyrus the great ended the.

Babylonian exile and the Jews returned. to their homeland. So they've been so. they've been there since 538 B.CE. started in 1250 BC. So they were there. before anybody. Yeah. The Romans destroyed the second. temple of Jerusalem in 70 current era. leading to the Jewish. despora. Wow. Crazy [ __ ] history of. controversy in that one place. 48 the. state of Israel was established. Many. Holocaust survivors welcomed it as a. homeland. Yeah. In 48. And since then.

they've been at war. And so they started. settling. Another wave of Jews started. coming in 1904. From 1904 to 1914. So yeah, before. 538 BCE. Yeah. But the problem is like. there where are Palestinians there? And. like what are they? They don't even have. a country. Let's you if you've got. people that are right next to you that. don't even have a country. They don't. they don't have you know what do they. what do they do if they're ruled by. Hamas how do they fight back right these. they are protesting in the streets now.

they are against Hamas they get executed. did you just see that the big protest I. just saw that thousands and thousands of. courageous people protesting in the. street it's uh they're like we don't. want any more of this stop well well. look what happened they got they they. uh got I mean because of Israel's help. got Assad out of Syria now the rebels. took over. But Assad killed almost. 500,000 of his own people, tortured. 100,000. I mean, those are the numbers I.

read. I don't know if they're exact, but. he's gone. There's a lot of. controversial about Assad in Syria. There's a lot of controversial about. controversy, you know, about what. actually happened and why we were. backing the rebels. We essentially we. essentially backed ISIS, which is crazy. We backed al-Qaeda, which is just nuts. He but he was more dangerous in Syria. according to than to re according well. also according to Israel because Israel.

weakened Iran's military after they were. attacked by Iran who was. supplying Assad with weapons. You know. what's really [ __ ] Before Iran became. a religious state, women were like. wearing minikrts. They were hot. that. the it was like there was freedom. everywhere. People were like chilling. It seemed almost like an like Europe. probably like a like a resort vacation. Like they were beautiful. Oh, they were.

gorgeous women. Iran that Persian women. have incredible jeans. It's like you you. you look at these photos from like see. if you can find some photos of Iran like. early 1970s. I was I was seeing some. things on it this morning actually on. the way over here or before I left uh my. house. I was seen this it's it's so hard. to imagine that a place that was that. had a democratically elected leader you. know it was you know it was kind of. almost European and then now now it's.

just a full religious state and anybody. anybody who protests against the. government gets assassinated like they. they they assassinated an Olympic gold. medalist wrestler because he was. perceived to be protesting I don't even. know if he actually protested It was. like some things that you post online. like if women take off their headscarves. they can get killed. But why? I don't. get it's crazy that a country can fall. like that. I don't get. where gays or women or whatever are.

backing they're basically backing Hamas. Yeah. I don't get [ __ ] That's it. Because they just do the new thing. What's the new thing? Is it climate. change? Why am I yelling climate change? Okay. Climate change. Is it do black. lives matter? Okay. Black Lives Matter. It's all it is. There's a lot of people. out there that are just [ __ ] and. those are the people that you see. getting busted into these rallies and. there's just a lot of dopes that you. could get to agree with almost anything. And there's gay people for Hamas, believe it or not. Trans people for.

Hamas. It's [ __ ]. I know. Blacks for the clan. hard to. tell how many of them are real because. there's a few people that troll online. and they'll pretend I'm a, you know, I'm. a trans woman, but I'm also a Muslim. Like, okay, they will throw you off a. [ __ ] roof, dude. No, there's none. left. Uh, there's no roof left. There's. a couple high points. It's just hard to. get to them. It's here's And obviously, as a comic, I believe in the First.

Amendment. I say [ __ ] that you can't. cancel me. Anyhow, I believe and maybe I'm wrong. and maybe you disagree. I I want to see. your opinion. Look at this. Okay, after. Iran for the 1970s. Look, girls in. miniskirts looking hot. They look That. looks like Europe. Look at this girls. sitting in front of a car. Cute little. out. She'd be [ __ ] killed doing that. now. Yeah. Look at the beaches in Iran. in the 1970s. Isn't that [ __ ] crazy? No litter. Look at these. God, look at. the tits on that one. Hot one lady.

though, that was the future. The. future's in the lower right corner. covered up like. Yoda. It's crazy. It's crazy that that's. that's what happened to that place. Like. look at these people all hanging out. being free. 1979 is when it all went to. [ __ ] And they call it the revolution, but I think it was USbacked son. Okay. What's your opinion? This my. opinion. Free speech. Protest all you.

want at colleges. protest. wherever, but take off the masks. I. think you should take off the masks, period. I don't believe in a society. where people walk around with their. faces covered. We think there's it's too. dangerous. It's a public safety issue. It's too hard to identify criminals. It's too hard to identify someone who. commits a crime. During the during the. Vietnam protest, there was never a mask. Those people were proud to protest. against the Vietnam War, but there also.

wasn't facial recognition. software and. cameras in the sky. It's like, you know, there's a lot ofations. That's true. But. now they're hiding and they're. committing to. me some crimes on campus, I think. Well, they're certainly doing a lot of things. they shouldn't be allowed to do, like. disrupting classes and screaming at. professors and Yes. And it's organized. Yeah. Yeah. It's organized and people. join in because they just join. They. want to be like and there there's.

there's a lot of people in this world. There's leaders and there's followers. and there's a lot of followers. More. followers than leaders than leaders in. the world. Yeah. So, we'll get off of. this because I know it kind of, you. know, but I just want back. No, I have. other things in there. I have others. other good points in there. Okay. It is. it is a good point though, but it's like. when you have people that are bitter. enemies like this, like these kind of. conflicts take thousands of years to. work through. And in in the case of. Israel, it's still it is thousands of.

years old. It's look, how are they going. to win anything through the UN when. there's 22 23 Arab countries in the UN. and Israel? So everything is going to be. voted against. Yeah. Israel. They're 22. 23 [ __ ] hour. Uh I like I said this I I can't solve or. whatever. Is it is.

it unfair? Is it whatever? Uh my concern. is what's going on in this country. That's my main concern. My daughter's. going to college. I don't want her to go. to a college where she feels scared to. go to class, right? where she feels. threatened just to be who she is. Told. her to go to college in Texas. I know. that's what she I I wanted her to go to. So, you know, they have concealed carry.

on college campuses here. You know, it's. so Yeah. This is a a different place. It's it's a different time. This is what. America like is supposed to be in a lot. of ways. You know, it's supposed to be a. lot more free, less law less. laws and but you know, there's a lot of. laws here that are kind of crazy. you. know, the the abortion thing, the six. week thing is most women don't even know. they're pregnant that quickly. I I think. if a woman if a woman if a lady a woman. Okay. Okay. I told you I walked out in.

11th grade. If a lady I think does all. her chores, I think I think once a week. she should be able to wear slacks. I. abortion to. me. I even it's not really I think a man. and may I could be wrong if you're. married or you live with your spouse the. male might have what 20 25% of the. decision maybe 30 but some single guy.

probably never had a girlfriend never. live with a girl shut the [ __ ] up shut. the [ __ ] up you know what you just want. to be part of something well people love. controlling people though they really do. which is why you Oh, those climate. protests drove me [ __ ] crazy where. they would protest for climate change by. blocking the highway. Those [ __ ]. idiots. All they want to do is control. people. That's what they want to do. You're not changing anyone's mind. No, not at all. Holding a flag in the middle.

of the highway. You're just pissing. people off, but you're controlling. people by stopping traffic. And that's. what people like to do. They like to. control people. And they don't know if. somebody's given birth or somebody has. to get to the hospital or for anything. It's all selfcentered. [ __ ] I'm more important than you. My, you know, throwing paint on somebody. with a fur. They should turn around and. [ __ ] beat the daylights out of or the. these [ __ ] climate people walking.

into the Reich Museum or the Van Go and. throwing paint on a [ __ ] on gluing. yourself to the wall. Yeah. What the. crazy and then again, you see what they. did at the Porsche dealership? They they. glued themselves to the floor and the. Porsche dealership, they just shut the. lights off and left them in there. Oh, really? Yeah. [ __ ] you. They came back. the next day. They glued their hands to. the floor like that. They're going to. stop everything and they were like, "Okay, good. We'll just shut the doors.". Porsches. Shut the doors. Leave them in. there to [ __ ] themselves. Good. Porsches. are nice cars. Why would they attack.

Porsches? They're only doing it because. they know it'll get attention. That's. all it is. It's a bunch usually a bunch. of very privileged rich kids, white kids. that come from a family that has a lot. of wealth and to rebel against their. parents or probably [ __ ] investment. bankers or something, they decide. they're going to fight climate change, man. And they don't even understand what. they're fighting. They don't understand. the science. They don't. It's complex. It's multi-layered and nuanced. And. there's a lot of propaganda that's.

attached to what they call the green. agenda. Because the green agenda, like. all things that are big and public, is. profitable. They have a bunch of. companies that if they can get these. laws pushed forward, they can have. industries that emerge and their. industry can can benefit from all these. laws. And so they'll they'll fund. protest. They'll get people to do. things. But it's all 4D chess. There's. all these multiple layers of things. happening. And then there's the. inconvenient actual climate data that.

the Washington Post printed that show. that over the last 50 million years, we're in a decline. The Earth is in a. cooling period. And the the Earth's. never, like you probably know this, but. for people who don't, there's never been. a static temperature on Earth. It's. always gone up and down wildly. It's. unpredictable. It has multiple multiple. factors. Carbon is probably one of them, but it's not the big one. It's not all. of it. There's solar activity that's you.

can't control at all. Solar flares. happen and some of them happen. They've. happened in the early 1800s. They blew. out all the [ __ ] Morse code systems. Like what was like the there was a big. solar flare in the 1800s. that see if you could find that. But. there's they could blow out the power. grid easy. Kill all the satellites easy. What what carbon is is food for plants. It's the dumbest [ __ ] thing to. protest against. Pollution is a giant.

issue. Yeah. Do do we have an impact on. the weather? I'm sure we do. We have an. impact on [ __ ] everything. But CO2, net zero, all this [ __ ] this is. nonsense. Carrington event most intense. geomagnetic storm recorded history. peaking on 1 to two September 1859. during a solar s solar cycle 10 created. strong auroral displays that reported be. glo that reported globally and caused. sparking and even fires in telegraph.

stations. The geomagnetic storm was most. likely the result of a coronal mass. ejection from the sun colliding with. earth's magnetosphere. So, if we have. some of those in the future, it could do. anything. Let's see. A geomagnetic storm. of this magnitude occurring today has. the potential to cause widespread. electrical disruptions, blackouts, and. damage to the electrical power grid. We've got real problems. Real problems. And you're not going to solve it with. electric cars. You're just not. You're.

not going to solve it with windmills. No. Hey, look. If you. drive up to Jersey Turnpike or anywhere. and the factories and the lights and and. all the smoke and all that [ __ ] just. everything. All right. Me turning off my light bulb is not. going to make a [ __ ] difference. compared. Particularly when you look at. the emissions that come from China. Yes, China is an enormous enormous. contributor to uh carbon emissions and.

not just carbon emissions, but. pollutants, particulates. They're not. stopping. They they they built 200 new. coal plants. You know, they they're not. going to stop. No matter what we do, they're going to do what's best for. China financially. Period. End of. discussion. All these conversations. they're having about net zero. Go [ __ ]. yourself. You're not going to stop that. Okay? And and this is what they're. looking out for their best interests. That's what they're doing. Just like. every other [ __ ] country is is.

basically doing. is survival. And that's my point with. Israel. They're looking out for what's. going to keep us from being extinguished. off this [ __ ] planet, right? And you. know, whatever it takes. That's what the. Jews and I'm getting back on this. because you lost me on all that [ __ ]. But uh what the Jews need is a Malcolm X. of Jews. Oh boy. Somebody look at. Malcolm X was great. He didn't.

say hate. He didn't say go after the. white man. He said do what we have to. do. Why don't you do that? Why don't you. be the Malcolm X for the Jews? Maybe. that's your calling. My vocabulary. It's You know what I mean? There's no. way to tighten that up a little bit. But. a little a little with Bonnie's help. I. fired my manager two weeks ago and I had. her write it out for me because I knew I. would have said something [ __ ] up or. mean. Smart, you know. And and another.

thing I go, hey, listen, you know, seven. years, it's it's time to move on and I. hope we still be friends. And he went, "Definitely." Not like, "Are you sure? Maybe we could work this out." It's like. when you [ __ ] leave a girl. She like. Great. Okay. Wait. Whoa. Come on. I I. added something. Fight for me. So, nope. So, yeah, I would love to speak in. colleges or or or maybe that's it. Let.

it cool down. Let it cool. You're right. Give it a year or so. Give it a. year. I probably wouldn't be able to get. to the auditorium. Uh Trump said the. wildest [ __ ] about Gaza. We're going to. turn it into the Mediterranean, the. Middle East. Like, what? We're going to. take it. But he keeps saying and I I. don't follow. uh you know if you don't release the. hostages there's hell to pay. Well what. what has hell what has he done uh to.

help release the hostages? I mean we're. now they're being attacked by [ __ ]. Yemen through the who you know I mean. what I don't know release the [ __ ]. hostages and then maybe are left now. what is it 70. or I don't know cuz they keep dropping a. you know four hostages for a thousand. prisoners or whatever you know I mean. that's is that what they're doing. whatever it's a tradeoff how many. prisoners they got to give them for a.

hostage and you know these. This would have never went on in this. We would not have put up for I mean we. did with Carter with uh the Iranian. hostages. Yeah. 200. They were there for. what two years or Well, they kept them. there until Reagan was in office. Yeah. They kept them there until after the. election. That was part of the deal. Yeah. Part of. the deal was you you'll release these. folks after Reagan takes over so that. Carter can get credit for it. Yeah. I'm.

sure. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That was written. That was imagine you're a [ __ ] You're. in there and you're like Jesus Christ. So I got to be in here for four more. months. Four months. So this guy gets. credit. This is [ __ ] crazy. Well, did. you hear I didn't see it. I only read. what these reporters and journalists. what she said on 60 Minutes. Do you. think the hostages didn't feed you. because they ran out of food? Oh, that Hamas didn't feed the hostages. Leslie Stall said that in an interview. Did she really say that in an interview?

Look it up. She said that to one of the. hostages. Do you think they didn't? And. don't quote me because this is what I. read. I don't want to get sued by Lesie. whoever. Uh but I think she said what I. read. Do you think the uh the captures. didn't feed you cuz they ran out of. food? That's a crazy thing to say to. someone who was a hostage. Yeah. I mean. that's crazy on [ __ ] 60 minutes a. journal. How do you say something like. that? That's a crazy thing to say. But. they're bad. The the problem with these. 60 Minutes journalists is the same.

problem with what they did with the Kla. Harris interview where they took a. bumbling answer and edited it out and. put an answer to she gave to something. else in its place to make it look like. she gave succinct clearcut answers. It's. it's that's not really journalism. They're not they're not doing journal. That's not a question you say to a. hostage. you when you're talking to a. hostage, you want to find out what the. experience was like in in as.

compassionate a way as you can to talk. to this person who's been through hell. You you don't ask them. Do you ever. think that maybe they didn't feed you. because they didn't have any food. themselves? Well, here you go. Look at what their. face looks like and look at the sunken. in faces of the starving to death. hostages. Well, obviously they didn't. they didn't give him any food, so shut. up. It's you. can't watch their news. You can't cuz. you're going to go. It's not news. anymore. No, it's it's clickbait and.

it's [ __ ] It's a business and it's a. shitty business. It's not good at doing. what it does. And it's all bought and. paid for by pharmaceutical drug ads. And. it's just not the news. It's not. you. get some information that you can learn, but it's not like the unbiased this is. what happened, this is what caused it, this is what's being done now. It's not. that. It's like halfway there. They're. they're kind of almost activists. I I. had an argument with somebody close to.

me because I go on Gutfeld. I try to go. on once a month, like I said, and and. she says, "Oh, oh, you're you're. proTrump." I go, "I'm not pro anything. or anti-. anything." I go, I go on, "Where else is. a comic going to sit for an hour? Try to. be funny on TV." Yeah. On TV for an. hour. There's not much left. There's. not. And it's definitely not going to be. on the left because they're not going to. let me say the things that I get away. Yeah. On the Gutfeld show. And it's a.

great show. I mean, it's if you say. something funny, they laugh. It's to me. the closest to tough crowd, right? To. me. I see what you're saying. Not quite, but I know. Not quite, but it's I mean, it's fun and and and it gets whatever. views. And I said to this person, you. work with the pharmaceutical companies. for 30 years, and you're going to tell. me Yeah. and you're gonna go on your. high horse about me doing a show that's.

gonna help my career and build numbers. and Well, it's not the same. No, it's. worse. It's way worse. It's worse. It's. way worse. Pharmaceutical drug companies. are responsible for who knows how many. deaths and injuries. Yeah. Yeah. They do. good, too. Absolutely. Some. pharmaceutical drugs are great, but you. can't be on your high horse. You work. for them. That's crazy. In any other. business, they'd be in jail. They would. [ __ ] jail. If you lied about what. your product does and it kills a bunch.

of people, you're in jail. Can we talk about one of the reasons I'm. here? I don't know if you remember this. I hope you do. Uh, I had this torn. rotator cuff. Mhm. And you said, "Come. down." Yeah. We're going to get you some. stem cells. Now, what's the B the BPC? BPC57. Is that better? Which is better. for the stem cells or the BPC? There's. no one better. They're all very good. BPC57 is it's called body protection. compound 157. It's a peptide that helps.

heal soft tissue damage. So does stem. cells. All all those different things. are good because I'm not getting my. shoulders operated on. It's like a. sixmon. It's rough and it doesn't always. work. So what exactly is wrong with your. shoulder? Well, this is a torn rotator. cuff, right? I have I even brought the. disc, the X-ray. Oh, great. Do you Did. you do any exercises for it? You do any. rehabs for it? Not yet, because I was. waiting to do this to see where this. took me and then how I I would go from.

there. But, you know what I mean? Exercises are always good like bands, like band work where you do these kind. of things where you like you keep your. you keep like a towel pressed to your. body so you hold it in place and do. these like rotations with bands. Like. all those things are good just to keep. everything strong. Anyway, do you do any. of that stuff? Not those yet. I haven't. I tried doing You ever hang from a. chin-up bar? You ever do this? Like, no. For a torn rotator? Yeah. Just to. strengthen and and to release a pressure.

in your shoulders. Oh, really? No. I. could. It's good. It's good for shoulder. health in general to hang from a chin-up. bar. And if you can't hang, what you do. is like get on a box or something that. brings you to the height of the bar and. just hang a little just get some weight. on it until you can hang fully. I mean, look, I could I could still play golf. I. could swing like this. That's good. So, totally [ __ ] Okay. So, when I went to. the doctor, there's a lot of things you. can do, rehabilitation things you can do. that'll help you. Here's here's the only.

thing, and I could be wrong. You'll. you'll know. when they said, you. know, rehab to build up the muscle, but. I'm 67. How much more muscle am I. building? If you're 167, you can build. muscle. That's That's a silly way to. look at it. Oh, really? I Okay. 100%. If. you're alive and that means your body's. recovering. Yeah. So, that means your. body's generating tissue. That means you. could build muscle. Okay. If you can go. play golf, you can build muscle 100%. If.

you're 80 [ __ ] years old and a woman, you can build muscle. I mean, I I work. out still. I just certain exercises I. can't do. Yeah. Just you need to do. exercises that rehabilitate your. shoulder. Yeah. You You can't just. expect it to get better on its own. You're going to have to put it through. some work to strengthen the muscles. around it. Well, I'm going to, like I. said, after I do this. When are you. leaving? When are you flying out? Wednesday. Okay, great. So, we'll get. you in tomorrow morning. No worries. Cool. Get you into Waste Well, and we'll. set it up. Um, did I bring the show to a. dead halt with my map? I thought I.

thought it was a good conversation. Yeah, it's good. It's a good map. You. know, it was I got more stuff. I didn't. want to listen. I printed out a bunch of. stuff. I don't want to go back and have. my [ __ ] dumb Jew friends going, "Hey, you didn't bring anything up." Oh, is. that what they do? Yes. Stop talking to. them. [Music]. Then then my wife, don't say anything. stupid. Is that what she said? She goes, she goes, "Sorry, Bonnie. You know, be funny. That's what you are. I was I was pretty.

funny. I got to say, listen, I'm I'm a. good interview. You're fine. You're. doing fine. You know what? You know. what? Are are the best not your best, what a. great show would be? What? Me, Colin, and Norton in here. Phenomenal. That'd. be phenomenal. Just like Tough Crowd. Yeah. You probably couldn't do it today. unless you did it on the internet, but. you could still do it on the internet. Like Colin should really bring it back. I know. There's plenty of guys that. could still do it. Like Norton would be.

[ __ ] phenomenal at it. We just did. Norton's podcast. Me, Colin, and Norton, whatever podcast. He's got 12 of them. Him. And it was one of the most funniest. things when it comes out you'll ever. hear. Us three together. It's like a. [ __ ] You get back in the old groove. again. Yeah. Because we're just there to. have fun. We're there to have fun. And. Tough Crowd and Opie Anthony were huge. for comedy. huge. cuz Opie and Anthony, one of the things. that they did that was brilliant is they.

just let us just go wild, just be. ourselves. They didn't really try to. control it at all. You know, Anthony. would jump in with some funny [ __ ] but. the the whole show was like, "Bring on a. bunch of comics, have them talk a bunch. of [ __ ] give them give him the reigns.". We I mean, I could I was in there one. day, Anthony was eating a piece of cake. I walked by him and smacked it out of. his. hand. He He he laughed as hard as. anybody on the planet because.

the the times we had in there. I was on. there with uh Were you with me when they. brought in Marian Perry? Were you? No. You weren't there. You weren't there. Marian Barry? Marry and Barry? The. [ __ ] the the mayor? The mayor of. Washington DC that got arrested for. smoking crack. No, you were in there. with him. Oh, that had to be him. We. grabbed I thought you were in there. Norton was in there for sure. He was. next door doing something and doing.

another interview and he was in the. hallway and I think Opie said Marian and. Barry's in the hallway right now. I'm. like let's go get him. And we got him. We brought him in and we started I. started asking him about crack. He's. like well nobody knows what was in that. pipe. I'm like well you know you know. you [ __ ] know. What were you smoking. that wasn't crack? That's almost. crazier. You know you Oh really? He. smoked tobacco out of a glass pipe. One. of my favorites is when he was running. for reelection, which he eventually won. after he got out of jail. Uh they asked.

these people, "Do you have a problem. with the fact that the mayor used to. smoke crack?" They interviewed this guy. on the street. He goes, "Oh, everybody. smoke a little crack every now and. then." I was like, "Oh, this. conversation's over. This conversation's. over." That's. it's I remember the times and I was in. there one. time. Pete Rose, Bobby Kelly, Ricky. Jervis, right? And [ __ ] Pete Rose called me. He goes, "You look like.

some ratfaced soccer player." Whatever. he said. It was very funny. Whatever. Pete Rose said was very [ __ ] funny. So I walk over to. Bobby. Then I walk past Bobby and I walk. past Pete Rose and I sit down and Pete. Rose says, "Why are you out of breath?". I go, "Because I had to walk around you. two, you fat fucks." Right. But and so. they But you could say anything you.

wanted on that show. Yeah. And it didn't. it Yeah. Because I never went on it. until it went to XM, you know. I was. never on it when they were on. terrestrial radio when they got they got. kicked off terrestrial radio and then. they got on XM and when they were on XM. it was wild they were it was like the. first time it's like there was Howard. when Howard got on XM or Sirius I guess. first before they merged and then the OA. show was on XM like this is [ __ ] cra.

this is crazy this was like what ra this. is basically green room talk green room. talk for the whole. world okay So, I brought Patrice into. OA. Did you really? Yeah, I brought him. in. Wow. He [ __ ] smashed me the day I. walked him in cuz we went through the. back. We went through this way that he. goes, "What do you think? This is good, fellas. You walked me through the back. You couldn't take me through the front. door." So, he became a fixture on. So, one day we're in [ __ ] O and I'm.

driving this little Porsche Boxster. He's driving this big Escalade because. you know he's a [ __ ] you know buffet. molester and he's in this. So he's. saying he's trashing one of my Rolexes. going you're a [ __ ] selfish douchebag. driving a Porsche to me going yeah so. you can't have people you know and I'm. not thinking well maybe if you didn't. eat [ __ ] pound cake or whatever you. wouldn't eat a big ass but he's beating. me down bad. I mean [ __ ] killing me.

I'm speechless, right? Speechless. He's. [ __ ] just pounding me. And I I walk. out of there. I'm [ __ ] So, the next day. or two days later, I go online and he's. trashing my car. And I look at the price. of my car new and the price of his car. and I send it to him. I go, "Look, my. shitty car costs more than your car. new." And he calls me. He goes, "You're. still thinking about this?".

He he goes, "Really?" You're thinking. about it right now. Still to this day, you're arguing with him. No, I'm not. I. could have I should have. I. he would I would drive him home one. night. I was driving him back to Jersey. City and I I got to go to the bathroom. and we're walking up to his house and he. says, "Oh man, I don't have a manager, an. agent. Nothing's going on." I go, "I.

can't get work. I don't have an agent. either. Nothing." And we just both. started cracking up and walking. It was. the funniest thing. We [ __ ] I can't. We were We were reading for the head of. a sitcom for ABC. Me and Patrice, we. were going to be the leads of the. sitcom. So, we go into the head of. casting at Marcy. Phillips and he doesn't want to be there. and I can't act. So, basically, I'm not.

a good and at the time so he won't take. his face out of the [ __ ] copy and I'm. trying to read with him the scene and he. won't look at me. And Marcy Phillips is. yelling at me going, "What are you. doing?" I go, "This [ __ ] guy won't. connect with me. How can I act with. somebody that won't look at me?" And she. goes, "Can you two please leave?" We. laughed all the way down the hallway. We.

laughed. We just got kicked out of an. audition as the leads of sitcom and we. just cracked up all the way because it. just to us was the funniest. being funny in the moment. The idea of. you getting a sitcom was so unlikely. It. was always all so unlikely that when it. failed, like if you went on an audition. and it [ __ ] up, you're like, "Yeah, it. wasn't going to happen anyway. You never. thought this is going to be it." Yeah. Never once. No. Never. Never. I walked. out of I walked out of an audition once.

I just got back from Aspen. I had a lot. of heat in Aspen, but I This is when my. anxiety I have I've had anxiety my whole. life. 21. I was hospitalized for anxiety. when I was and they didn't know what it. was. They thought you were just nuts and. gave you thorine and how doll and you. shuffled around like a crazy man. This. is so explain to me what it feels like. What what is this anxiety like that you. Now when I had it when I had it bad well. I felt so disconnected.

that even when I talked it felt felt. like an echo almost like I was outside. of myself, right? Like if I look in a. mirror, I'm going, who am I looking at? It was just so so disconnected. And you. were 21. Yeah, 21. Smoking pot and. stuff, but Oh, well that's it. Well, some of it was probably where am I going. in life? What am I doing? And you're. getting high and I'm getting high, which. is like, you know, if you're freaking. out and you get high, you know. So, do.

you have to pee right now? No. Why do. you? Cuz you said you have to go to the. bathroom. You were talking about your. story then. Okay. cuz I was like. preparing to like cut it off and let you. go to the bathroom. No, no, no. This is. the best day of my life. I uh except for. the [ __ ] map. The map turned out great. It turned out. a good little conversation. I got, you. know, I had to talk. [ __ ] Thank god it's Monday. Uh. Thursday, the Thursday ones are so much. better. I'm Monday. So,

uh, my. anxiety, wait, what was what did it feel. like or what? Yeah. What was like when. you say it overwhelmed you to the point. you had to go to the hospital, was your. heart beating? Yeah. I was just I didn't. know what was going on. It it turned. into panic or whatever. Like I was so. [ __ ] up. My friend, you know, I was. going I I was selling meat and seafood. out of a car, out of a truck, some. businesses back then. I went and this. therapist, I go, "Help me. I'll give you.

some free steaks and seafood." And I was. just out of my [ __ ] mind. And I get. anxiety talking about it. It really. gives you a little. anac. We drove to Florida. I was there. for a day. I said, "I got to get the. [ __ ] out of here. Take me home." And we. drove there and drove back. Then I. checked into the hospital. uh the fifth floor basically for [ __ ]. cuckoo. Cuckoo because they really.

didn't know what anxiety was back then. They Isn't that crazy? Cuz that's not. that long ago in human history. Well, I. mean it was 40 something years ago. Nuts. just like in the last 40 years how much. they've learned. Well, yeah. But also. too, it's easier to say he's that. person's nuts. Give him thorine. Thorine, how whatever anti-csychotic. drugs are and and I swear to God, you. know, my day was and then I would.

shuffle I would shuffle. around the the floor with this girl. We. just me and this one girl, we shuffle. My friends came up to see me and I'm. like, I can't see you today. We're going. for a walk. You know, I was like one flu. of cougar. I was [ __ ] out of my mind. So that could have been you for the rest. of your life. Oh Jesus. So I know. Well, because I did do acid in my day and.

people sometimes do that [ __ ] Never. come back. Never come back. And I saw. that on Dragnet. So uh it's in real. life. Yeah, it is real life. Sterns. talked about that. He did a big dose of. acid once and he was [ __ ] up for a. long time. It'll [ __ ] you up. There's a. guy from Pink Floyd that disappeared. Oh, I hope it's [ __ ] Roger Waters. Oh, it's How dare you? How dare I? How. dare you? The guy, what's his name. again? Shine on you, crazy diamond. Oh, you. mean he did ass and just Yeah, it's not.

just one person. There's been a lot of. people that had an acid trip and just. never came back. My brother did it when. we were doing he was real young and he. was having a bad trip and I had to. babysit him the whole day. Yeah, it's. [ __ ] scary. Yeah, that that's it. David Gilmore show written by David. Gilmore. But it's not it's about who was. it about? Sid Barrett. That's right. Sid. Barrett did acid went crazy. See right. there. Departed from the band in 1968.

after dealing with the mental health. problems and substance abuse. The story. is he never came back. It's crazy how. how that's the most that drug is so. uncontrollable. Well, also you like. what's the dose of an effective dose is. a droplet on your tongue, which is. crazy. Well, we were doing bladder or or. window pain, four-way window pain. Who's. making that? They're not making in the. same labs where they're making Tylenol, you know, they make it in some [ __ ]. grful basement. So, oh, too much goes.

into that draft. Yeah. So, uh, I I got. out of the hospital and. for years, oh, I don't know however long. it took, it passed. Life started getting. better, whatever. Okay. Then, and I would get anxiety, it would. come and go, but back then, well, I. didn't know what it was. It turned into. panic. And so then when I was 40, I would watch.

my kids after I got divorced. I would. have my kids every day. I would work. nights and I watch my. uh I guess four and. sixyear-old. My wife would either drop. them off or I would pick them up then. drop them off. I would have them in a. days. My day was my kids. Whatever. Go. to the park, do this, do that, just. watch my kid. Mhm. So. then they went off to school full-time,

you know, uh nursery, uh uh first grade. So now I'm at 40 years. old, living in some [ __ ] third floor. apartment, divorced from my first. wife, bouncing off of [ __ ] walls. again. I mean, [ __ ] 40 years old. No, just I'm I'm going I got to quit comedy. I got to go into the psych word. I'm. [ __ ] up. This is [ __ ] up. So, I. found this therapist who was also and I.

was already sober. I found this. therapist that was in recovery and he. basically brought me. back, you know, some medication through. his partner who was a psychiatrist. He. was a therapist. Great. I could talk. I. could say anything to him, whatever, you. know. And then it just got better. And then I. realized and.

worked. knowing whatever anxiety I feel, it'll. pass. Nothing lasts forever. It'll pass. Like I had a little anxiety for the last. week thinking about this. I go, "What?". You know, really a little bit because. And we're friends and I've done podcasts. and what? Bonnie goes, "Shut up and be. funny. Be whatever. You. know, a million things went through my. [ __ ] head because I mean, [ __ ]. you've had [ __ ] Trump on Elon. You.

know what I mean? And and that's my low. self-esteem because of course I should. be doing everything in my mind. Do you. see what I'm saying? Does that make. sense? But even when I did Tough Crowd, I was. on 30 times. Every episode I had anxiety. till it started. every special or. everything I've ever done. Anxiety for. the first second, I walk out, boom, gone. All right. It's just Well, that's. because you care. I mean, what you're.

calling anxiety is just nerves. Yeah. But when whenever there's if you're. doing something that's difficult or. something that's important to you, you're going to have nerves. That's. normal. It's healthy. That's that shows. you're challenging yourself, which is. yeah, one of the most important things. you can do in life to to stay vibrant. Yeah, you have to challenge yourself. When I did the Trump when we roasted. Trump, uh this was a friars roast, right? It. wasn't It's when they broke away from.

Comey Central, right? They broke away. So, it's at the Hilton in New York. 2,000 people. anybody that meant. anything in New York from club owners, agents, managers, celebrities, they were all. there. So the first act goes up, this. guy Stewie Stone, oldtime Catkill com, he kills like no one I ever seen kill on. a roast. [ __ ] you, Trump. [ __ ] your.

casinos. [ __ ] you. [ __ ] the just [ __ ]. slaughtered, right? And I'm sitting on. the desk. I'm sitting next to Isaac. Hayes. Opie and Anthony are there. My. father, his wife, Bonnie, before I. married her. And and he I go, I'm going. to end my. career. I go, I'm going to end my career. here. Okay. Then Susie Esman goes. up, slaughterers. Slaughters. I guess Amaros.

wrote her some funny jokes and she wrote. and she's great at roast and I was ready. to sneak off the [ __ ] just leave. I. go it might be better if I leave then go. up. Well then Belure went. up. So took a little wind out of the. room. Took a little, you know. Yeah. So Regis Filman was the host. It was three weeks after Ronnie.

Dangerfield died. Three. weeks they introduced me. I go big hand. for. Regis. Originally they asked Ron to host. but he said he'd rather be. dead. Right. Zero. Almost zero. Right. Oh, really? Right. But I got him. I go, "Don't [ __ ] with me. I'll bring Bellser. back. Right. I had And then Al Sharpton.

was sitting on the deis. I can't believe. I said this, but back then it was okay. He wasn't roasting, but he was on the. deis. And it's when he was running for. president. And I said, "The only way. you'll get on the White House property. is with a lantern in your hand." I said. to him, "So, [ __ ] him." I didn't care. And then I got him back. Three of the jokes that I said were the. ones that were printed in this in in the. newspapers. You know the one I did I go.

Trump the reason Trump puts his names on. his buildings is so the banks know which. ones to take back. And that was 20 years. ago. But it was the most terrifying. moment. wanted next to doing Def Jam as. the first white guy was one of the most. terrifying moments in my I mean I'm. going I'm going to end my career but Dev. Jam you know Dev Jam was on for five. years the number one show on. HBO I go okay we're going to use a white.

guy it's me right so now I got white. comics you better be funny I have black. white comics are saying that to you us. yeah which ones. I 20 years ago, the white comics that. were doing black rooms back then. I see. You know what I mean? Then there was. black comics mad that I'm doing it and. they're not. You know what I mean? So. they're taping in New York every five. nights. This is funny. Five nights. Was.

that when they were filming in Harlem? It was. It could have. I don't know. It. was in New York. Five nights at some. theater. Okay. And it was the year I did. it the fifth year when they had a. different guest host every night. Like. Martin Lawrence wasn't do one night one. show Chris Rock Chappelle Jamie Fox and. uh Steve uh what's his name? Harvey was. my host you know. so I'm going every night. I mean, I went.

in one night and it was so this is so. funny. Like guy Guy Tory would come out. and do the warm-up and he would say, "Listen, this is not the Apollo. There's. no [ __ ] booing here. This is HBO. We. don't boo, right? This is this is a. whole another level that we don't want. to hear any boo." So this comic comes. out. He walks out and with a black audience, if you're wearing the wrong sneakers,

you're in trouble. Believe me, I used to. do a lot of, you know, he comes out like. Reebok. He's wearing a all gold. suit. And his first joke in New York is, "I just want to say I'm not from New. York. I'm from Canada." Right. Oh, no. He's bombing so bad. And when a black. audience can't boo you, all you heard in. the room was m. [Laughter].

child. It was brutal. So I'm on now they. tape five nights, two shows a night. I'm. on the last. night, second show and I go second to. last. Now, all the comics that were still in. town that were the celebrity hosts, all. the we're at the tape and I'm going, "This is one of the scariest moments of. my life." I mean, you know, no white.

guy. Steve Harvey brings me out. He. goes, "Whoa, our next act is something. we haven't seen or special, whatever." And Russell made me wear his. clothing. I got Fat Farm on and these. baggy pants, you know, and I look back on it because it was 25. years, it would be different. I was p I. pandered a lot to some ex, you know what. I mean? I did grow up in that.

neighborhood, but I'm out like this and. all, you know, and it it worked out. luckily, but I look back and go, I would. never do that now from 25 years ago, the. pandering and and you, you know, just. just, you know, talking like I'm [ __ ]. from the hood and [ __ ] you know, and I. had a good set. It worked out. Uh, but. it was the second scariest moment in my.

career. But listen to what you just. said. Both scariest moments of your. career worked out great. Yes. They. always Yeah. So, wouldn't that. eventually build some confidence? Oh, I. have confidence. Okay. It doesn't sound. like it. Oh, no. I'm just talking scary. moments. And listen, you you you always. got to question yourself, right, in this. business because you want to get better. You. wanna and you just I don't know. I. question myself. I.

go I. have not again not an ego. I have a. reputation to live up to of the stuff. I've done in this business. Right. So I. I come out and people are. going, "Look, Bobby Bobby and Keith, we're at the. seller one night. I go, "I got a spot at. the. underground." They go, "We're going to. come over and watch you bomb." That. sounds like Keith. Keith and Bobby.

Right. So, so Nikki Nikki Glazer's on killing. Killing. Not the cleanest, but funny. I. don't give a [ __ ] what somebody else. She's funny and she was killing. So I I went on and my first two. jokes I I I had they killed and I go, "See, Bobby, see Keith, I can follow. anybody." Right. Right. Well, then I.

didn't know this. They went into the. back corners of the. room and after every joke they would go, "Oh, oh.". And they had the whole audience turn on. me going, "What's going on?" I would say. a joke that might have been a little. edgier and they would go, "Oh, real. loud." And so the whole audience is. going, "What's this guy doing up there?

They're groaning him." One table goes, "What's going on here?" And I'm [ __ ]. bombing now because these two [ __ ]. Jamokes are in the back of the room. going, "Oh my. god, it's so. [ __ ] It's so [ __ ] funny." Bobby. and Keith. Well, that was the culture. The culture of comic goes was like. constant busting balls. Constant busting. balls. We Somebody would go on stage and.

we would all go downstairs and sit in. like the front row and watch. That's the There's nothing worse you. could do for a comic than your friends. sit in the front row and stare at you. You're like, "What are you doing, man?". When when Kevin Hart was leaving New. York to go to [ __ ] LA, he threw. himself a little go away [ __ ] show at. Boston Comedy Club. You remember Boston, right? Sure. So, he's on stage pontificating, doing. whatever. And I don't know why, but me,

Keith, and Patrice were in the back of. the room and there was like 10 phone. books back there and he's up and we. started throwing phone books at him. Phone books? Yeah. They were just in the. club from I guess they were delivered. there. Our phone all these phone and. we're throwing phone books at Kevin. Hart. And he. says on interview, he goes, "I knew I. was accepted when they were throwing. phone books at me. I knew I was part of. the crew, you know, but we were just.

heaving phone books out of like [ __ ]. three [ __ ] in the back of the woods. room. I mean, and we would. just It was just fun. It was probably. the most fun I've had in. comedy when we would just stand out, me, Patrice, Keith, and. Norton till 3 and 4 in the morning in. front of Boston just trashing each other. and laughing. Just you.

can't replicate that. It can't happen. again. It was just so funny. Keith is. uh he's fun if you see him around, you. know, or Norton or Bobby. But it was so. much fun. I heard Keith is killing it. now. Even with his strokes, his special, we were at the tape and the. fact that he didn't win an Emmy. It It's. It was so [ __ ] good. His special.

He painted a picture when he was talk. You could see everything he was saying. him in the hospital, him with a stroke, him. It was so good. We walked I walked. out of here going, "This is the best. thing I've ever seen." It was so good. Wow. He was so good. You know, uh I don't know why he didn't. I mean, it's Who gives a [ __ ] about the Emmys? Yeah. Who? [ __ ] off. Everybody knows how. good it was. All those [ __ ] award. award shows for art to me are some of.

the most ridiculous things. Yeah. Really? How many [ __ ] albums? Oh, I. don't even want to say her name, but. they they don't know. They don't know. [ __ ] It doesn't matter. You're right. It doesn't. It's just a industry way. that they can celebrate each other and. then they put on a show and the show. generates money and they make a bunch of. money from the show and then it becomes. a thing they hold over your head. Maybe. you can win a Grammy. Maybe you can win. an Emmy, maybe you can win a this, you. got to be a part of the club. Like look. what happened to Chris. He wanted to be. a part of that group doing the Oscars.

and he gets smacked by Will Smith. They. don't arrest him and then 10 minutes. later or whatever it was, Will Smith's. on stage is receiving the Academy Award. and they give him a standing ovation. It's [ __ ] insanity. That just that is. Hollywood. That that shows you what. these people are. To want their love and. their respect is pointless. It's so. true. They don't even know what they. like. They like what everybody everybody. tells them to like. They don't. understand what their support. They. don't they it's just a bunch of people. wanting to be a part of the group.

That's the inroup. Like what do we have. to do? What do I have to say? What do I. have to agree with? That's all it is. years. ago. And it's true. If that was. Chappelle, he wouldn't have smacked. Chappelle cuz Chappelle's a little cut, a little bigger, you know. Well, I don't. know. The whole thing was crazy. That. poor guy. One move. He does one move. Now everybody remembers nothing but that. forever. But what? [ __ ] I am legend. [ __ ] Ali. All those different things he. did that were awesome. Nobody cares. anymore. He's like, "That's the guy. that's Chris every day." He's going to.

wake up in the morning and go, "Fuck. that one thing. [ __ ] If he hadn't done. that, if he just ate it." And by the. way, not even bad jokes. Like the mo GI. Jane. Like that's the most [ __ ] that. was a powerful movie. It was a great. movie about a strong woman. Like it's. not even really an insult. It was just. silly to smack a guy like that and then. that's your thing forever. People are. going to remember that. crazy crazy. blunders, you know, and that probably. comes from not having anxiety, by the.

way. That comes from having too much. confidence. Confidence. Too much too. much. T too much of a belief in. yourself. Too much of a belie Yes. in. your own importance that you can. interrupt this entire enormous award. show, the biggest award show in the. industry, that you're set up to receive. a [ __ ] Academy Award in about an hour. or whatever it was. You're you're gonna. go up there and smack a guy on TV. Why. would you do that? Because he doesn't. have that anxiety. So your anxiety. shields you from doing stupid [ __ ].

Yeah. The fear and the like the. insecurity sometimes is good. Sometimes. it's good for you. Keep like the lack of. insecurity could be the worst thing if. you're too cocky. That it's. Yeah. They say be humble. Be humble. You. know, and I thought Chris handled it as well. as he what what he what can he do other. than like run off the stage? Yeah. Which. he probably should have just walked off.

after he got smacked because try to keep. going. Yeah. He's I worked with him on. both Oscars he hosted and he is the. nicest guy on the planet. If you I guess. if you're work I don't know just from. working with him, you know. Yeah, he's a. very nice guy. He's a nice guy and also. he's harmless. Like you can't smack a. harmless person. That's crazy. Yes. I'll. tell you what, if that was Tony, there. would have been a fight. If that was. Tony Rock, there would have been a. fight. Oh, yeah. Tony. Oh, yeah. Well,

Tony went off on on stage like right. afterwards about it. Yeah. Tony's a. different dude. But Chris like is like. almost if it was anybody but Chris, you. know? I mean, you can't do that to. anybody else. It's crazy. If he did it. to Kevin Hart, Kevin Hart would crack. him. The whole thing is crazy. It was. crazy. It didn't make any sense. It's like the guy's in some sort of a. very bizarre relationship with his wife. And you know, whatever internal. conflicts they have just manifested.

itself in a terrible decision that he. made. If if he would have sm if he would. have said that about my wife, I would. have smacked her and said, "Laugh laugh. What the [ __ ] It's funny. Come on." Yes. But, you know, not being able to take a. joke is one of the worst qualities that. people can have. Do you not want Do you. take yourself so seriously when when. someone says something funny, you can't. laugh as well? That's crazy. You're. missing out on laughs. You're missing. out on your your your own joy. Like, you.

should have joy about someone making fun. of you. And you're great at that. You're. great at that. It's one of the best. things about you on OA is that when they. would crack on you, you would laugh. Yes. just it's so important. They were. good jokes. They were funny. They were. on time. And if I was at times lucky. enough to come back with something, then. I would. If not, then I sucked it. The. last time I did Kill Tony a couple weeks. ago and I told a joke and Tony goes, "That's the oldest joke in history." And.

I go, "Yeah, I wrote it." Right. So, okay. So, shut the [ __ ] up. But it was. going it was a great. episode because he [ __ ] with me and I. took it. Well, Kill Tony is one of the. only places left where that kind of. [ __ ] with people is like openly. encouraged. That kind of [ __ ] with. people is like I mean and Tony's the. best roster on the [ __ ] planet. He's. quick. He's He's like Norton. He's so. quick you think he just like Norton. He's so quick you think he wrote it in.

advance. Yeah. He's and it's off the. cuff. He does it all the time. He does. it in the green room. He does it. everywhere he goes. Well, but here's the. thing, too. He's done that show for. what, 10 years or more? He's built that. muscle in his head where boom. Yep. Quick. It it it's automatic that. something's going to come back. Well, when you host a show like that too, you. understand the rhythm of the show, the. beats of it, you know, like and he's so. good at letting other people shine, you. know? That's what he's really good at.

Like he wants you to do well. He wants. he doesn't feel upstaged if Shane comes. on as Trump or when Kyle was doing Kyle. did RFK Jr. and he also did Elon Musk. And then who Kyle Donigan? Yes. Yeah. He's so good. [ __ ] brilliant. That. guy is [ __ ] brilliant. So good. He's. so funny. He is so [ __ ] funny. Yeah. And then you had Adam Ray who did Dr. Phil was [ __ ] amazing. And Biden. It's crazy. I did show so good. I did. Kill Tony twice with Adam Ray and he.

he's fun to be with one. They love him. Yeah, they love him. But he laughs and. gives you your dude too. Like I've done. radio with Jervis. Jervis is a big. laugher. If you say something funny. Yes. He'll laugh and crack up. You know. what I mean? And you got to have that. Even it's just if it's funny, you know, they don't they don't get jealous or get. mad and go, "I'm gonna outdo that." They. laugh and Well, the people that do suck.

No one no one who does that is any good. What's that? No one who does that is any. good. No one is like, "Oh, I got to get. I got to do better than him." That's. Yeah, it's stupid. You're missing out on. the whole thing. Like, that's not what. we're show. It's a show. It's It's. Whatever. Hey, I got a piss. Let's come. back. We'll come right back. So I heard. you. heard the the stem. cell I can't do stuff for a couple. weeks. You could do things golf. Yeah, for sure. With a stem cell. Yes, of.

course. If it gets shot into me. Wednesday, what's tomorrow? Tuesday. I. could play golf Thursday. Yes. What. about the BPC? Yes. Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You just can't lift. heavy weights. Oh, I'm not going to lift. heavy weights. That's all it is. Just. don't tear it apart while it's building. back up. That's the whole idea. Don't. aggravate it while you Does that hurt. when you do that? No. Then don't worry. about it. You'll be fine. A little. No. Well, you should be doing. rehabilitation. You should have already. I'm looking at your shoulders right now.

They look like they fall apart on their. own. You got to you got to exercise. If. you're having injuries with your. shoulders and the muscles around them. and people are telling you to strengthen. them, you should listen to those people. They're right. Well, no. I listen. I. went to uh physical therapy for my back. and it and it's working. What I So why. would you do it for your shoulder? Because I was waiting to do this [ __ ]. first. All of it would help. The more muscle. you have around your shoulder, the. better it is. It was only two or three. weeks ago he said go to physical.

therapy. I go, well, he wanted to cut my. shoulder. I said, I'm not cutting it. I'm going to try the BPC and the stem. cell. So you can definitely heal soft. tissue injuries without surgery. The the. real issue is when tendons are separated. and they need to be re. reputed. That's the real issue. Well, a. lot of people tore rotator cuffs. Tear. tear rotator cuff. Yeah, I had a torn. torn rotator cuff. I think I did it. I. was doing upright rows with 50 lb kettle. bells and I think that was too heavy or.

too much. So, you got a trainer, Rich? Huh? Get a trainer. I'm I'm doing all right. I mean, I know. how to work out. No, but obviously you. need some help. Nothing wrong with a. little bit of help. Listen. [ __ ] Look, do you want to get better or. not? Yes. Okay. You're saying get a trainer for my. shoulder or for my shoulder for. everything? For all of it. So, someone. show you how to do it right so you're. not hurting yourself? Well, I think I'm.

doing triceps and biceps, right? I know. I am. I'm doing lats, right? Show me the. guns. Well, they're not. Then how you. think you're doing them right? They're. not bad. That's ridiculous. What? Small? It's tiny. Oh, listen. It's there. I mean, I can see it. It's. hard. Is it? My chest is nice. You want me to do my. chest? You want to see my chest? No, I'm. good. I'll take my chest out. No, no, no, no. There's no no reason. My lats. and traps are good. Okay. For look,

for almost 68, I think I look better. than most people I went to school with. That's good. I think I. think Look, I work out all the time, but. I maintain. Okay. I maintain. I'm not I. feel like a therapist. I feel like I'm. helping you through your life. When you. got in here, you are helping I'm helping. to guide you. No. Get a [ __ ]. professional that knows how to work out. and build yourself back up to the point. where you're not having these kind of. injuries.

Yeah. And rehabilitate it like. correctly. Like when they tell you to do. physical therapy in your shoulder, [ __ ] do it. I'm gonna do it. I want. You waited three weeks. You're 68. You. only have a few years left. Fix it. So. then what the [ __ ] You only have a few. years. So Well, do it. You want a few. years left in [ __ ] working order. [ __ ] listen, Bonnie. I mean, you should listen to Bonnie. Uh, you're. right. I'm gonna. [ __ ] try. What? Do you think.

I'm never going to get my arms bigger. than that? That's ridiculous. Of course. you could. At 68, you think your arms. bigger? Yeah. 100%. Yeah. The reason why your arms exist at all is. cuz your tissue is regenerating. Your. tissue is your you're healing and you're. getting better. Yeah, you 100% can get. stronger. 100%. No ifands or buts about it. You. will get stronger. I have knife.

lat. and still get stronger. As long as. you're alive, you can get stronger. because if your heart beats, if your. hormones work, if you can move around, that means your body can repair itself. Well, I I won't do. uh what is it that gets you hard? Uh. violent girl. No, no, the har. Uh no, not the drug that makes you. Yeah. testosterone. What's it called?

Testosterone. You won't do that. Well, because it's it it it makes it it it. leads to prostate cancer. No, it. doesn't. That's what my doctor told me. Your doctor's wrong. He died. It's. incorrectly. Your doctor's an idiot. He's dead. He died two years ago. He's a. dead idiot. He died two years. No, he. doesn't know. He doesn't know the real. studies. Like, there's a guy named. Brigham Beller who runs ways to Well, who could explain the flaws in that. study that showed that it gave people. prostate cancer. Look, people get. prostate cancer. Testosterone is not.

giving you prostate cancer. It's like. across the board, the same percentage of. people that take testosterone or don't. take testosterone get prostate cancer. There's probably a ton of variables. A. lot of it has to do with diet. A lot of. cancer has to do with diet. Fuel of. cancer is sugar. Do you eat a lot of. sugar? I stopped for a year. I'm back. I'm going to get back on. Listen, I eat pretty [ __ ] good. For the last. month and a half, I haven't. for the. last and a lot for a year. Yeah, there's.

environmental factors, there's genetic. factors, there's a lot of different. things, but you know, if you want to. take care of yourself, testosterone will. actually make your body heal better. You'll feel better, you'll have more. energy, your immune system will function. better. Everything will work better. You. should have your hormones balanced. Like, this is we live in a time where. you can get a full blood panel and find. out where your nutrient levels are. And. if you do it with a good doctor, what. they'll do is they'll adjust your diet. and your nutrients first and then see. like in a couple months what your levels.

are then and then find out how much are. you sleeping. Are you sleeping right? Okay. Well, there's a problem there. because then your body's not recovering. So, you've got to figure out a way to. adjust something in your life to make. you sleep better. And then after that, once they get everything all worked into. its optimum r, you're doing all the. right things, they go, "What's what are. your levels now?" Okay. will add a. little add a little bit of testosterone. peptides that'll increase your body's. ability to promote growth hormone. There's stuff called like samoralin that.

makes your body produce more growth. hormone. So like your body repairs. itself better like when you're younger. So there's all rigorous science behind. all this stuff. It's all there's many. I'll get Brigham explain it to you. He'll do a much better job than me. Who's that guy tomorrow? He's the guy. who owns Waste Well. Yeah. He's been on. the podcast. He's testified in front of. Congress. And I bring I'll bring the uh. disc with bring the maps too. He'll love. the maps. Let me tell you something. about these maps. These maps. I printed. this [ __ ] out. I see. I looks like your. printer needs ink.

First pretty dull. Listen to me. Listen. to me. Fix your eyes. Let me know. My. eyes work pretty good. You want to see. some other statistics? I got All right. What else you got? No. I I don't want to. get Did you see the those girls land. today? The Blue Origin. They shot that. metal dick up into space. Yeah. People. were mad they wouldn't let the ladies. drive. Katy Perry and someone else. Katy. Perry, Lawrence Sanchez, Jeff Bezos's. wife. If if that thing blew up and if. Jeff Jeff Bezos's wife blew up with it,

Twitter thinks that the capsule is too. clean. They don't think it was real. Obviously, of course, Twitter Twitter. doesn't think space is real. There's a. whole community out there hashtag space. is fake. Yeah. Oh, yeah. There's really [ __ ]. people that think the earth is flat and. that there there's a firmament. Look at. that. Yeah. They think birds aren't. real. Did they land? Is it over? Yeah, they did it. Yay. Where' they land in. the ocean? No, in the desert. How long. did they go for? Parachutes. They land.

with parachutes. So, the thing lands. with a parachute. I'll show you video. Oh, yeah. Let me see. I want to see the. video. Oh, that's them in the middle of. the desert. Wow. One second. No, it. doesn't. It's got It looks different. than that. That has to be crazy. That. was Would you do that, Rich? Would you. go to space? Uh, probably not. I don't. even You think you'd get anxiety if you. went? I don't even like Ferris wheels. Well, those those things are very. different. Is that it? H You know what? Let's see the landing.

Oh, people get their stuff in there. How. How long did they go for? Very soft soft. landing. Look at this. Here it is. Imagine from space and the only thing we. got to land you is a parachute. Like one. of the oldest technologies. Wow. You can hear them in there. Blue. screaming. Wow. How long How long were they up there? I. don't. know. Not long. Isn't it funny that they. screamed? Do you think the men would.

scream like that? Would you and I scream. like that if we landed? Well, I don't. know about you, but I know me. Look at. that one. Look at they go back. the one. below it. I'll tell you what I'll never do is clap. when a pilot lands. You don't do that. That's his [ __ ] job. It's true. What. if it's a female pilot? You're like, I wouldn't have got on the plane. No, that's there was a bunch of them in a.

row where I was like, Jesus Christ, the. Delta one in Canada where it flipped. upside down. Yeah. Can you imagine? The. lady just started landing planes. recently. Like, yeah, take that one out. in the icy runway. Here's 30,000. No, I'll wait for the lawsuit. Blue Origin. declined to say how much the flight cost. or who paid for it. The trip came two. months before Sanchez and Bejo to marry. in Venice. Oh, they're going to marry in. Venice in two months. Oh, they haven't. married yet. Oh, okay. I thought they. were married. Um, that's hilarious. They're going to do it in Venice. Oh, how beautiful and romantic.

Yeah, quit. You can't tell people how. much it cost cuz then there's going to. be retards like that money could have. housed so many houseless, so many. unhoused could have benefited. How many. poor people? There's like these [ __ ]. retards like if Elon Musk gave a million. dollars to everyone on Earth, he'd have. money left over. There's all these. mathematicians out there that are. [ __ ] constantly want to comment on. other people's money. How convenient.

And and those people would [ __ ] up that. money, too. You know, it's all the rich. people are the problem. Not me. I'm. rich, but I'm not as rich as the richest. people. So, everybody richer than me is. a problem. H [ __ ] house kill. All. these people. All these [ __ ] people. Yes, I own three homes, but I'm a United. States. And they're a lot more worth. millions and millions of dollars, but. everyone richer than me is the problem. It's the rich rich rich people, not the. regular regular rich. Oh, that tour.

There's so many women in AOC wondering. Yeah, tax the rich. Remember she had. that [ __ ] dress she wore? Tax the. rich. How about [ __ ] off. What are you. going to do with the taxes? That's the. problem. When when Doge is uncovering. $250 million that was spent on animal. transgender studies where you're [ __ ]. chopping the dicks of mice and turning. them into [ __ ] [ __ ] off. [ __ ] off. with your tax the rich. How about you. fix the world without taxing the [ __ ]. out of everybody? How about Yeah, get.

rid There's other ways. I can't even. tell you what I sent the other day to. the IRS. It's just [ __ ] And I'm, you. know, just a regular [ __ ] you know, so much money. I'm like, complaining. about Elon. Elon doesn't pay taxes. Elon. paid more taxes last year than any human. being that has ever walked the face of. this nation. That's a fact. So shut the. [ __ ] up. It's like there's never it's. never enough. And people that don't have.

always look at people that do have like. what you could do with that money. Well, you could do with your money, you. [ __ ] One 1% in the world. You know. what it is? If you're a 1enter in the. world, you know what it is? $34,000 a. year. No. Yes. If you make 34,000. American dollars a year, you are in the. top 1% of planet Earth. Get the [ __ ] out. of cuz you're comparing it to the rest. of the world. All of the planet. The.

whole planet. Most people are dirt poor. Most people. So all this [ __ ] about. he could do that money. Well, you're. saying that from your [ __ ] Manhattan. apartment where you're Ubering all over. the place and getting [ __ ] takeout. Shut your mouth. Listen, when I was in. Cabo working there, it was amazing. You. drive to the airport, people are living. in [ __ ] shacks there, this and that. It's It's horrible. It's horrible. But look, and and it's it's this sounds.

narcissistic. I came from a major major drug addict. and I turned my life around. It's it's. all you got to find a way to do what you. can for yourself. I don't give a [ __ ]. where you are. I grew up with. dudes from heroin addicts to people with. five kids at [ __ ] 22 or whatever. And. a lot of people made it out of there and.

found a way to be successful. Yeah, you. can look at it that way. But the point. is like looking at people that are uber. successful and telling them what they. should do with their money is just the. dumbest [ __ ] And that's why they don't. want to give out how much money it costs. to fly this rocket ship into space. Of. course, it's frivolous and gratuitous. Of course, it's a publicity stunt. They. had a bunch of hot ladies. They flew. them off into space and then they. landed. Yay. Now you've been to space. But basically, you're in space for like. 10 minutes. That's what the flight was.

It probably cost a billion dollars to. fly people into space for 10 minutes. Wow. Do you know how many [ __ ] clubs. you could have bought me? Yeah. How many. golf clubs? How many golf clubs? That's. your thing, right? You're just a [ __ ]. infeterate golfer, right? I love golf. Yeah. You and Jamie Jamie should show. you a setup back there. Yeah. He's got a. driving computer with a big screen. I. have I I was hitting in in this morning. into the screen. I I You bring a screen. with you? There's one at the hotel.

Really? Yeah. Oh, that's amazing. Yeah. To Thompson. I went down worked out. twice. Tell people where you're staying. No, I I'm not staying there. I went. walked over there. Oh. And used our. screen. Really? Yeah. No [ __ ] Yeah. I. brought my clubs. Yeah. And plus this. isn't live. You and Jamie should [ __ ]. have a little driving contest. I think I. played before. I played with him and. Tony before. We played together. Yeah. A. couple years ago, like two years ago, maybe. Oh. Me, you, and Tony, right? Yep. Oh, you won. Yeah. How good do you.

played? How good is you, Jamie? I don't. recall. I mean, I'm not good either, so. it probably I shoot anywhere from 82 to. I want to break a club. I don't know. what any of those numbers are. 82 is. pretty good sometimes. I've shot in the. 70s. How is it? Pretty good. Yeah, very. good. Pretty good. I shot I played for. 18 holes. Yeah. When I was a kid, the. guys who golfed all the time were the. guys who weren't paying as much. attention to their career. I remember. thinking like a lot of these guys were. kind of stagnant because they're golfing.

all day. Yeah. They were go all in. Boston. Those guys would golf all. [ __ ] day long. Get hammered that you. grew up. No. Guys that I started out. with. Oh, the golfers all wound up. spending so much time playing golf. I. thought I was like, "Wow, that's a big. distraction. You should have some activities, but do. golf is like how many hours? Four and a. half. That's a lot of hours. That's a. lot of hours. But also too, it makes you. disconnect from the all the [ __ ]. that's going on in life. You know, you.

don't have to deal with whatever, you. know. Do you golf with comics, too? So, you get to talk some com. Yeah, I think. I'm going to. golf if I can after I get these shots. Thursday with uh Aaron Berg. I think I'm. going to golf with Yeah, you definitely. can. You you could golf on Thursday for. sure. It's golfing is not gonna [ __ ] it. up. It'll be sore for a day or two after. you get the injections, but you'll be. fine. Uh we got to clean you up, Rich. Foss. Clean up your life. Thank you. I. We're going to do it.

Check in with me. I'll tell you what to. do. I look I'll show you my chest. Don't. do it. I'll show you a picture. I I don't care. So, you're saying from here on? Yeah. You're not saying what what are you. going to you going to impress me with. your chest? That's crazy. Well, you say. I got small arms. I got to say, well, I. got You're telling me they're big. I. never once said they're good. Your. triceps and your biceps are good. That's. crazy. Oh, listen. Let me explain.

something to you. Okay. [ __ ] waffle. neck. Waffle neck. Is that bad? No, I call my. kids that. What does waffle neck mean? I. call him chicken head. Okay, you're right. They're not big, but. they're hard and and they're not flabby. under falling apart. I'm not I'm not. some flabby. Yeah. Congratulations. What the [ __ ] What? You want credit for. being okay? Yeah. Yeah. That's crazy.

Whatever happened to Mr. Pull yourself. up by your bootstraps, get your [ __ ]. together. What about all that talk? That's Hey, you barely doing anything. You're like, you're okay. I work out six. days a week. I lift. Do you? Yes. I have. a nice gym in my basement. Do you think. if I worked out with you, I'd be. impressed at the effort that you put. forward? Not in the least. Not in the least. I could do it. I do. 500 crunches. That's amazing. I do zero.

I don't do any crunches. What do you do? Sit-ups? Yeah, I do a lot of different. stuff for Do you do uh planks? No. I. think planks are nonsense. So do I. And. I They're uncomfortable. It's hard to. do, don't get me wrong, but I think in. terms of an exercise for your core, it's. kind of nonsense. I think uh you should. do things first of all, you should. almost always do things that have a. range of motion. Like when you're you're. I like to do things that make my body. work as a unit. So all the ab exercises. that I do, I do a lot of different.

things for abs. I do reverse squats. You. know what those are? You put your. ankles, strap your ankles to a cable. machine. You lay on your back and you. pull towards you. Oh, I know. I do. those. Well, I got one of those machines. where I put my knees in it and I pull up. to get the bottom. Okay. Yeah, that's. good. Those are good. You know what I'm. saying? Sure. Yeah. Yeah. Those are. good. Anything where you work your whole. core, you And then you got to also do. the opposite side. Back extensions. You. should do that back extension. I do it.

on that thing. I you were showing me. Yeah. Uh I'll do back Uh because and I I. got to lose another 10 pounds again. I. gained it back during but it comes and. go. Uh and because I have. lower disc problems and you know I'm. getting uh sciatica. So whenever I lose. weight, I'm in much better shape. Yeah. I could tell by when you got on that. stretching machine, the uh Dex thing, your body doesn't go all the way down. It's tight. Your lower back is very.

tight. Oh, I'll go in there right now. and go all the way down. I was just. doing it just to No, I'm saying there's. tension. You see how my body hinges? Yeah. My body just hinges. It just goes. down there. There's no tension. Yours is. like You stop like right there. You. probably could go all the way down, but. your body doesn't want to. The point is. there's tension in your lower back. Well, I've never used that machine, too. It was my first time with excuses. Do. you stretch? No. On stage, if they need. me to do an extra. 20 stretch, I've done it two hours. If.

DL Uli and I'm middling and he's coming. four hours. late. Back in the day I was working. Carolines and I opening for deal and you. know I'm doing all my good stuff up. front. Oh no. It's all and then you have. to stretch and they go stretch. I'm. going what am I going to do now? Right. He wasn't there yet. No he wasn't. Oh. that's the worst feeling in the world in. you get all your best material and they. tell you to stretch like I don't have. And you're just scouring your brain. You're scouring your brain. Well,

luckily for you, you could work the. crowd. Yeah. So, I now what was the. question? Am I doing do I stretch? Yeah. Yeah. I do for my back. I have this extra. I lie down. Yeah. And. I pull this back like that. That's good. for my lower back. You know what that. is? Do I know what it is? Do you know. what I'm talking about? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I know what you're doing. My lower. back. And I do that. Just crossing your. legs and leaning forward. Yeah. And I. pull it back. Right. And then when I'm. doing sit up crunches, I'll I'll do it.

either on that machine or I'll pull my. legs this way, too. So, I'm getting my. lower. I watch you move. I'm like, "Oh. my god." First of all, I know the crew. you have come in here, a lot of them. None of them work out at all. All right. A lot of them do. Who doesn't work out. at all? Name one. Uh, no. I don't want Name a guy. Uh, uh, Ariane. Ari doesn't work out at all. Okay, there's one. That's true. Mark. Norman. I don't know if Norman works.

out. Look at him. Mark Norman definitely. works out. Oh, he does. He runs. He can. do a lot of pull-ups and sit-ups from. audiences. He lo You know what I like talking to. Mark? He loves comedy. And he knows the. history of it. But he knows the history. of it. Like he like you'll talk to. comics now and go, "Oh, Steve. Landersburg was funny." Or just who was. that? Or look at him. Come on, man. Of. course. [ __ ] He's ripped. He's ripped. I don't like that. How dare you? That's.

now you feel bad. Now I bad. You feel. bad, right? It hurts me to see that. You're talking [ __ ] And he looks great. Oh, [ __ ] You're talking [ __ ] It looks. like a male model. Show me that again, Jamie. He's not holding up a a. newspaper. We don't know when that was. shot. Who cares when it was shot? You. never looked like that. Show me that. again. What are you going to do? You. take your clothes off? No, I'm going to. take the picture. Look, he looks [ __ ]. good there. Yeah, he does. He looks. good. So does his wife. God damn it. Yeah. Look at that right there. He's got. boxing gloves on and an iPhone. He's in.

shape, man. All right. You're incorrect. All right, relax. Feel bad, right? No, I. don't. Shane works out. He's here all. the time. This is not working out. We. work out. Shane works out. Yeah, he. comes in, uses the gym. Where did I put. We work out together. Well, you put your. glasses. He can find your abs. Let. [Music]. me show you somewhere. All right, listen. to me. [ __ ] You are looking for your. glasses. Are you going to find a photo. of you looking good? Yeah, forget about.

that. That's the past. Let's concentrate. on now. Let's concentrate on put away. the cookies. Put away the sugar. Yeah. Listen to your doctor. He tells you to. rehab your shoulder. Get yourself in. shape. Can't believe we're doing this. You know, people are listening. I can't. see this. I I They couldn't see the. picture of him either. Yeah, but I mean. this you being on your phone here. looking for a photo of back in the day. when you looked reasonable. This was. recently. How long ago? What happened? What happened?

Oh, [ __ ] Oh, Jesus. Look at you. They look good there. There. you go. Oh, not bad. Okay, you look. pretty good right there. What happened? It's not that bad now. How long ago was. this? 2018. Ah, that's pretty recent. That's pretty recent. Yeah. Pre-. pandemic, a lot of people fell apart. during the pandemic. That's what. happened. And then I came back on track. for a year. A whole year. And then and. since January when I was in Canada. Oh, Canada. Did you? Canada [ __ ] me up.

Communism. They got communism. Yeah. It's It was They made you eat poutines. It was Oh, that [ __ ] Oh, it's so good. It's so late night late night poutine. Just it's just pure heart attack. Yeah, they have different delies in Canada. Like we used to go to Montreal those uh. they they call it smoked meat. Yeah. It's basically like going to Caners, right? Or going to cats. I've been to a. couple of those smoked meat. Oh,

phenomenal. But you know, if you I heard. and I don't know if this is true and I. if you eat too much smoked. meat, you can get stomach cancer from. that. From all that smoked meat. Who. [ __ ] told you that? This guy with. stomach cancer. No, not true. Smoked. meat is not what it is. They There is. some connection between burnt meat, like. the carbon in burnt meat and cancer. I. think it's colorectile cancer, but I do. not know how robust those studies are. I.

I mean, people have been cooking over. fire forever. I just don't I don't buy. it. There's a lot of [ __ ] involved. in these studies that tell you that this. causes cancer, that causes cancer. Here's what 100% causes cancer. Herbicides, pesticides, chemicals, forever chemicals. that are in your [ __ ] food. That pl. that paper cup that you're drinking out. of when you drink hot liquids out of a. paper cup. We got to throw those [ __ ]. paper cups. We have you seen what Paul. Saladino did where he dissolved a. Starbucks cup and shows you what's.

really at the base of it. It's basically. a condom inside. See if you can find. Paul Saladino's. Wait, you got all those. paper cups? I'll take them. I know. I. saw them today. I poured my coffee in. this. We're going to get rid of all our. paper cups. I'll take them. Paper cups. for hot liquids are [ __ ] stupid. because the the lining of those paper. cups is plastic. So, you're basically. pouring hot liquid into plastic, which. is the worst. Okay? Like look at see. So, he's dissolving the paper cup and. that's what's inside of it. So, you. think you're drinking out of a paper.

cup, but it's not really paper. It's. plastic. It's there's a plastic lining. and that's the only reason why those. coffee cups from Starbucks hold paper. So hot water to plastic. Give me some. volume on this. Chemicals, PFAS, anything in that plastic is leeching. into your drink and leeching into your. coffee drink. So do not think you're. getting a paper cup. You are getting a. plastic cup and you are putting hot. water into it. That's a horrible, horrible idea. Look at that. Looks like. a condom. What's the solution? Glass.

jar. Get your coffee in a glass jar or a. stainless steel mug. Simple solution. Don't expose hot liquids to plastic like. this. Horrible idea for your hormones. Horrible for your body. Send this to. somebody you know who drinks hot coffee. out of paper cups like this and needs to. get them out of glass or stainless. steel. You think this is Yeah, there you. go. My wife, she won't drink out. She. knows all this [ __ ] She's She's a. reader. You should listen to Bonnie. Just listen. I try to. She meditates. She's really good, you. know. She's smart, which is weird. Two. of you guys together that it works. It.

It's It's crazy. It's like It's like, you know what? I Here's the deal. What. What month? What are we at? Uh April. April. April uh 15th. 14th 14th. April. 14th. So, let's go. April 14th. May June. 30th. I'm back here at the club on my. birthday. Okay. So, you're going to look. good. I'll look I'll look All right. I'm. going to go to June 30th. We'll take a. picture. I'll put it on my Instagram. Take your shirt off. Flex. Not now. No.

June 30th. Okay. We're giving you time. Yeah. I want to give you a goal. June. 30th. Is that enough time, you think? Sure. Absolutely. Two months. Yes. In. two months, you can lose 20 pounds of. fat and look great. Just eat healthy. Just get on a very low. carbohydrate diet. That's what I did. I'm I'm not doing keto. I'm not gay. But. I went gay a little. I When I try to cut. carbs, let me tell you something. It was. easier for me to quit crack than it was.

carbs. Really? Well, I never gave. anybody a hand job for a Kaiser roll. So, uh, part of my act, folks. He's. killing uh June 30th, the week I'm here, right? I don't know how much bigger my arms. will be. I'll just be just just be more. cut up. You look good. But I think I. look okay. Hey, well, we're going to get. you a blood panel tomorrow, too. They'll. find out where your hormone levels are. at and find out what the [ __ ] is wrong. with you. What do you mean? All that.

[ __ ] Blood panel with They'll draw. blood. They'll draw blood and then send. it to a lab. They're not going to tell. me I have cancer. They could if you want. to know. No, you don't want to know. I. already had blood tests at my doctor's. office. They sent me Does your blood Did. your doctor do a comprehensive cancer. scan? Did pro prostate? Yeah. Just looked in. your [ __ ] That's all they did? No. the blood and and I looked at my sugar. levels. They can do this incredibly. comprehensive blood panel. They draw. they dig a lot of blood out and then. they send it to a lab and they find out.

whether or not you have I have zero. cancer. I was super happy because when. they did it I was like woo I have the. same feeling like I don't know if I want. to know this. It's a scing for [ __ ]. start thinking about it and start mind. [ __ ] yourself laying in bed at night. like what if I have it right now? What. if I find out tomorrow I have four weeks. to live? It's [ __ ] too much anxiety. When I. went back in the day, everybody like. went for the AIDS test after you got Oh, I remember that. I remember my first. AIDS test. So, I got my AIDS. I was so.

scared. Okay, this is true. My doctor, whenever I went to my doctor and took. any test, he would call me and say, "Everything's fine." They would call say. everything's fine. It's true. So, I took. an AIDS test. Doctor didn't call you. And I get a call from the doctor and he. said, "Can you come in tomorrow?" I'm. going, "What do you mean come in. tomorrow?" My heart dropped cuz he would. have said everything's fine. I go, "What. do you mean? Why do you want me to come. in tomorrow?" He goes, "Uh, your tooth.

came in and you want to put your tooth.". It was my dentist, but I heard doctor. I. thought it was my real doctor telling me. I have [ __ ] AIDS. You know, cuz. everybody took that test in the in the. 80s. When I first got um insurance, I. had to get a AIDS test in the '9s. And I. remember the doctor, I said, "Boy, I'm. [ __ ] real nervous about this." And. the doctor said, "Are you gay?" I said, "No." He goes, "Do you do drugs?" I go, "No." He goes, "Don't worry about it. You don't have it." I go, "Really?" He. goes, "Yeah." I go, "What about the. [ __ ] news?" Yeah. The news is.

freaking me out where I'm scared to. touch [ __ ] doornobs. Like, how come? How come the news is saying that. everybody's going to get Listen, no. one's getting it other than gay people. and people who are inter intervenous. drug users. Well, people on my block. were dropping. We went to see Peewee in. the hospital and all the nurses were. wearing masks. So, we go, I think he has. that thing. Nobody even knew what the. [ __ ] to, you know. Yeah. They thought it. was contagious. By the way, that was. Fouchy, too.

Fouchy. Yeah. He's responsible for all. that. Fouchi was responsible for people. freaking out about AIDS. Fauci was on TV. back in the 80s telling people that. children could possibly catch it from. people. Yes. Wow. Yeah. Do you know the Dallas. Buyers Club where they were limiting the. medication that gay people could take? That was about. Fouchy. He was responsible for that. He. was the one who pushed ACT on people. back then. Was ACT was that chemotherapy. medication that was killing people. quicker than the cancer was. So they.

stopped using on cancer and they. repurposed it and started using it on. people that had AIDS. It it it didn't. help you dead. They were giving it to. people that didn't even have any [ __ ]. symptoms. They had HIV. They had no. symptoms. They given them ACT. They were. dying in months. It was the only time. ever in medical history where they were. telling you to take a chemotherapy drug. indefinitely. Every time you take. chemotherapy, the idea is that it gets. your body close to death but kills off. the cancer. They were telling you to.

keep taking it. Just keep taking it. It's nuts. What they did is madness. If. you read Robert Kennedy's book, The Real. Anthony Fouchy, it's all about that. And. the beginning of it is all about the. AIDS crisis and all the different things. that they did that mirrors exactly what. they did during the COVID crisis. What. so what drugs are they using now to uh. they started using protease inhibitors. and that really helped like the whole. AIDS thing is very complex. It's very. complex because the vast majority of the. people that got AIDS were were heavy. drug users. heavy drug users or gay guys.

who are experiencing, you know, a lot of. different sexual partners because of. blood being transferred. Yeah, that's. part of it. But it's also part of it, you're destroying your immune system. with [ __ ] drugs. Like these guys were. taking amal nitrate and crystal meth and. partying and not sleeping, just crushing. their immune system. Plus sharing. needles with the blood going from Yep. that too. And then they would get them. on medication that would definitely kill. them. And then it was a crisis. And. then, you know, everybody was running. around scared and I was scared too until. I talked to my doctor. He just looked me.

in the eyes. But no one could say that. back then. So, this is like 90. 91 maybe maybe 91 92 when I whenever and. when I got and my doctor was like, "Don't worry about it." I was like, "What about the news, man?" Like, I. remember talking to this guy. He was a. young guy. I was like, "How about why is. the news telling me I could get?" He. goes, "Heterosexuals aren't getting. this." Well, I unless you're an. intervenous drug user, don't worry about. it. I I I only checked because I shot. dope like maybe three times. What was it.

like? I didn't like it. It was just not, you know, I was more of a up, you know. What did shooting dope do feel like? What did it feel like? Just down. And I. I can't It wasn't I did it with Bastile. and he was a major he was a major one. He was funny though. Frankie was funny. I remember seeing him for the first time. when I was an open micer in ' 88. Yeah. And he was just a wild dude. He was like. one of the first guys I ever saw with. tattoos. All these tattoos and they're.

like he does heroin. Everybody tell you. oh really heroin. When someone did. heroin back there and it was crazy like. what he does heroin. Now how think about. how many people are hooked on opiates. back then it was super rare. Well the. difference between heroin and like. freebase you can function on heroin. There's functioning heroin heroin. addicts for years. Yeah, do it. You. can't function on free base or coke. You. got to keep having it. I had a buddy of. mine who was a long shoreman, and he.

would tell me that this guy he would. work with, and not just one guy, but one. guy that he would work with that he was. a friend on his lunch break, get a bag. of heroin, shoot it up in his car, sit. there for a half an hour, and then go. back to work. Yeah. They crazy. You. can't do that with freebase. It's. non-stop. You got to keep So, is that. your thing? Free basing. Yeah. Freebased. Free crack. When was it? How. old were you when you first freebased? Well, I when I first got high, I was 15, you know, pot. I leaded led my way up to. the coke. Coke. Yeah. Coke. And then so.

snorting coke. I snorted coke probably. when I was started when I was 18 or 19. Right. And then when you worked crack. Crack probably 25 to 28. Do you remember. the first time you did it? I think it. was with my cousin. Yeah. It was like. I go, "This is good. This is I mean I. got there was I'll tell you what I got. so many of them." So my. friend I was on the road. I came back.

He goes, "Look, I'm going to buy an. eighth of Coke, cut it into five. halves." Five half grams. That's okay. And uh we'll do two half grams and I'll. sell uh the other three. I know where. this is going. Well, we did one or. two and then he went to sleep and so. this is [ __ ]. up. I find I found where he hid it. Oh,

so he didn't hide it as good as you hide. your money. No, I went in and I steal. one at a time. I drove to the. convenience store. I cooked it with. ammonia, right? Ammonia? Yeah, clear. ammonia. Wait a minute. You actually. cooked the coke and turned it into. crack. Yeah. With a Yeah. Why is Why. would you do that? Is it better that. way? Oh, that's how you get freebased. crack. You got to You got to process it. You could do it with baking soda. You. could do it in a boil it in a Who taught.

you how to do this? I Are you a chemist? Like how do I was a crack addict? But. like other crack addicts were like. giving you the recipe. This really I. There's three ways to do it. So I did it. with or four with ether which you could. blow up your house, right? So. I would steal a half a gram from them. Uhhuh. I would go to the convenience. store. I'd cook it, smoke it, and pour. out the ammonia. I said, "I can't do. Well, how do you do it? I Yeah, I don't. want to help. You put it in. It's the.

internet. Chat GPT will tell you how to. make Ask Chat GPT right now. I'll tell. you. How do you take cocaine and turn it. into free base?" You co You put in a. teaspoon and you light it and it turns. into a rock. Okay. And then you squeeze. it. You squeeze and try to get the. ammonia out as much as you can in the. rock. So I would pour I would get the. ammonia, steal a half a gram from him. Uhhuh. Go to the bright early in the. morning, come back, cook it, pour the.

ammonia out. Well, now I would CBT the. chemistry behind it, how it's made for. educational purposes only, not intended. to encourage illegal activity. Bacon. soda. I said you could do it. Cocaine. hydrochloride powder with baking soda. and water. Sometimes ammonia is used. instead of baking soda, but baking soda. is more common for crack. Heat the. mixture. As it's heated, the cocaine. bases separate from the hydrochloride. and form solid rocks that float to the. top. Cool and dry. This is like a.

recipe. Solid pieces. The crack rocks. are cooled and hardened, then dried. So there you go. I emptied out the first. bottle. Mhm. Then there was two or three. more half grams. Oh yeah. I went and. stole another one. Went back to the. convenience store, bought more ammonia. After the fourth trip to the convenience. store, I go, "Hey, listen. I got a. cleaning business. We need a lot of. ammonia.". Well, I smoked all his coke. And I all. of a sudden I hear somebody yell, "Fuck." He woke up and saw his coke was.

gone. Right. How many hours had passed? Probably four. How many trips to the. convenience store? Four. And I was just. drinking straight vodka. Right. Whoa. And I'm walking home now. I'm $250 in. debt. I have And it was towards the end. of my career, but as a crack addict. As. a drug addict. Crack. Yeah. You call it. a career. It was a crack career. Well, I. think I told the story years ago, but.

I'll tell it. And he doesn't care. because he told it in his book. So, me. and Frankie are doing a one-niter. And. back. then, I had the car. you would pick up. an act at the improv and then go do the. one nighter in Jersey, right? So, we. pick up this comic, little white guy, whatever. We go do our one nighter and. we're supposed to drop him off at the. improv and I go, "Hold on. I got to make. a stop and we go up to Spanish Harlem.".

He goes, "What are you doing?" I go, "My. sister lives here. She's not doing. well." You know, there's there's people. chasing there's people chasing people. with knives up and down the street. And. I go up and. buy crack freebase, right? And the kids. like, "Get me home. Take me back to the. improv. What the [ __ ] is going on?". Right. Well, relax. So now we go down to. the Lower East Side and Frankie gets. heroin and the kid now Frankie's in the.

back seat tying up shooting heroin while. you're driving. Well, I'm driving. He's. in the back. God. And the kid is [ __ ]. scared to death. He was a little white. kid. He wanted to be Jerry Seinfeld. It. was David Spade. Was it really? Oh my. god. That's He was a little white kid. from Arizona. Do you remember when he. first started? He tells the story in his. book and I apologize to him. He goes, "Oh, don't worry. It's a good story.".

Right. But we kept him hostage as I'm. smoking crack and Frankie's banging dope. in the car. Oh my god. I heard an Otto. and George story once. He uh he's. working at a club in in Jersey. I don't. need to name the club. And he leaves the. club with the uh owner's daughter and. they're headed into New York and there's. another guy driving the car. He stops. off at Washington Square Park, picks up. a bag of crack, and starts smoking it in. the car. And the girl freaks out. And.

the And he he says, the classic guy. goes, "What? I thought the broad wanted. a. party." I just I just did a documentary. about him. They interview me. They're. doing a documentary on Otto and George. Well, we did uh a lot of those uh shows, those prom shows with Otto and George. Oh, he was he would he was genius. I. would Yeah. But I'd drive with him to a. gig and he would go, "Do you know what. George thought of today? What? You.

[ __ ] psychopath. You're Well, he. would make people pull over so he could. go check on George. George is in the. trunk. He He would pull over and check. on George. I think there's something to. that. I think that that dummy had a mind. of its own and he it might have been he. had some weird personality disorder. where he put a a personality to that. dummy. But that dummy when that dummy. would say things, you knew it was. George. Yeah. Like it didn't even feel. like it was. It felt like George had his.

own thoughts on things. I worked with. Vanrolus once and I go into his room on. the road and he's putting away the. dumy's clothes in another dresser drawer. than his. He's like putting away the. clothes of the dummy. Folding the. clothes. Yes. Of the of his. Here's a. bit I kind of want to. do. You know, back in the day, you know, when there was bank robbers, outlaws, they would wear a handkerchief and go. rob a bank. Well, I want to be the.

outlaw of ventriloquist where I go up a. little dummy and put a handkerchief. This way they can't see my lips move. But I could say I'm the outlaw of. ventriloquist and I could do a whole. five minutes and everybody's going, he. must be great. I can't see his lips. move. That's good. But you're supposed. to talk too. Like the po part of the fun. of being a ventrilicus like he would say. Otto would say, I can't believe you're. saying that, George. Yeah. How do you. shut the [ __ ] up? The eyebrows would pop.

up and he'd get crazy like is the banter. back and forth. I'll talk behind the. mask. I'm not going to do it, but it was. going to work. How come? Terrible idea. Okay, so I threw it out. Uh, how come. there's no ventriloquist on this planet. that gets along with their dummies? Well, there's not even very many. ventriloquist acts anymore. There used. to be a bunch of ventriloquist acts. There was Willie Tyler and Lester who. was in LA. There was a few. There was. Vince Antono in George from Long Island. You know what I think it was? It's like. when one guy becomes really big like.

Jeff Dunham. He became the man when it. came to ventrilas and then he's so. popular that nobody touches it anymore. Sort of like Keratop did that to Propax. Yeah. Like Propax used to be Remember. when we were we started out the [ __ ]. wood. Did you ever work with it? He was. great. He pulled it in [ __ ] diaper I. mean laundry uh basket shoots with. [ __ ] props. Oh, he had so much [ __ ]. Yeah, he had like a whole trunk full of. stuff that he would have to carry to the. club, but there's they don't have them. anymore because Keratop became so famous.

as a prop act that everybody's like, "Oh, it's a Keratop thing." They just. abandoned it. Like musical acts, there's. no [ __ ] musical acts anymore. There's. there was G they're on ships. Gary. Delano was a musical act, but guys. who've been around for a long time. They're legacy acts. There's no upcoming. people right now that are musical. comedians. Well, there's no magicians. Farino was a magician. Uh there was a. couple of magic acts like when I did one. nighters you worked there was jugglers. juggling Jack Schwarzy uh a couple magic.

acts. There's a few magic acts still. that work in California because because. of the comedy and magic club. Oh okay. Herosa Beach. But he used to have it. where you'd have a magician mixed in. with the comedy last time I worked. there. Okay. Well when I started working. there I was like I do you ever remember. uh Chips Cooney where he did the fake. magic act? No. He it was really funny. He would just do stupid stuff. Lenny. Schultz was a prop actor. Crazy Lenny. He just died. Oh, like about a month. ago, three weeks ago. Oh man, more pigs,

Lenny. There we go. More pigs. And he. was just He was so ridiculous. He was. nuts. He was so funny though. And the. the nicest guy in the world. Yeah. I. remember he had a he pulled out like a. Smokeoky the bear doll and he's like. only you can prevent forest fires. Shut. the [ __ ] up. And he punched the bear. It. was so ridiculous. and they'd move on to. something else like it never happened. It's like it was what he would kill. kill. And it made no sense. No sense. No. sense. It was just maniacal. It was just. crazy. His crazy face and crazy eyes,

but it was really funny. Like Keratop is. a good prop act. If you like prop acts, he's the best prop act. I mean, Rip. Taylor didn't like him, but you know, Rip Taylor's from how many [ __ ] years. ago? Rip Taylor. Yeah. Remember the gay. with the mustache? Yeah. And throw this. Yeah. the glitter and stuff. How come. they didn't like Carrot Top? Cuz Carrot. Top was getting real famous at the time. And Rip Taylor was a hater. Yeah. Was. the uh the prop actor. But it's like. most comics today are just comics. They.

just they just do standup. Very little. like all the variety stuff is gone. Well, Frankie Pace was a prop act and he. killed Yeah, he killed killed. Uh you're. right. There was it's there was more. variety in the one nighters in the. clubs. Oh yeah. Than there is just like. Well, in the 80s comedy was anything it. could there was no definition of it back. then. Like guys had like pieces of paper. they'd bring on stage and hold up signs. There was all kinds of weird [ __ ] And.

now it's just people talking. Oh, the. guy from uh Boston I work with him. He. was so angry. We did a one nighter. He. said, "Fuck this." at a pool hall. Bob. something bach uh he had paper signs he. would pull up and do a thing on signs or. whatever. He was just from Boston. Uh. well there was the guy from the blue. collar tour Bill Ingval. He had signs. Did he? Yeah. None of them said quit.

I don't. know what I uh what do you call it? what's his name? S kills on stage. Uh. Josh Adam Myers. Yeah, he does kills. Well, he does that uh goddamn comedy jam. where he does music, too. But that's a. little different. But we had him on our. show, would you bang him? We Me and. Bonnie do the show. It's [ __ ] Do you. know the show we do? No. We What we do. is Bonnie and I host it and we have like.

five comics and they do like eight or 10. minutes a piece. Then we have three. female judges and a gay and a gay judge. And after they're set, they discuss. whether they would [ __ ] him or not. Oh, banger. Interesting. And the gay judge. is always the funniest. He's always the. funniest. But some some of these female, they're just so funny, you know. Uh so. he came out. We did it a couple We do it. at a lot of festivals and we did it at. in New York and Josh Adam Myers came out.

and he sang the whole time. just. [ __ ] all over the stage. I'm going, he's got to close every show in the. comedy club cuz nobody's following that, right? There's no way seller that you're. going to go up after that, you know. Uh, and I'm not What he does is great. What. he does is, you know, Yeah. If you were. on the road and you had a middle act and. the middle act was brought to you by the. club, like they assigned a middle act. and the middle act was doing music, you.

were [ __ ] Yeah. You were [ __ ] Oh. yeah. Okay. [ __ ] guitar. I worked. Vegas once following a guy with a guitar. and I had and he's [ __ ] closing with. Springsteen and the bandana on his head. I'm going, "What the fuck?" It's a. totally different thing, you know? But. it's weird that that's not more popular. because it used to be so effective. That's what I'm saying. It's like, why. isn't there more of those acts like that. out there because it was so effective? Well, some of them got older and went to. cruise ships that do guitar. I know. But.

why didn't the younger ones Why Why. didn't How come no younger ones emerged? That's what's weird. It is kind of. weird. No impressionist either. Part of. that do impressions. Yeah. And everyone. that they would turn around, fix their. hair, and then do their impression. They. always turned around. Right. You know, right. Imagine if Jack Nicholson, you. know, I I'd be scared to turn around and. the audience left. Uh but they turn. around. There was so many imp Jeff. Deart, he did Rod Sterling perfectly. Uh.

it is interesting. There's not a lot of. just impressionists, right? Yeah. Danny Stone, Randy. Kredico. Uh. very Frank Caliendo does. Yeah. Yeah. But he he's like the only one. You don't. really see him in Well, I don't know if. he's still in clubs. He does a lot. Uh I. think he does theaters mostly. Uh yeah, he was on the virus tour on the Opian. Anthony tour. Yeah, I did it with him. Yeah. Oh, you did the virus tour? Yeah,

I did. I hosted every show. Yeah, I did. one of them in Vegas. Oh, yeah. Yeah, the Vegas one. That was like the last. time I saw Patrice. Wow. Yeah. We're doing the benefit. Uh. we do it I host it every year and Billy. closes it. We're doing it uh I think in. May this year. Oh yeah. Yeah. Okay. So. it's next month. Do you know the dates? Yeah, I'll tell you. Right. Tell. everybody so they can go buy tickets. Bust out those glasses out. These first, these are dollar store glasses. Okay. Why do you buy them at the dollar store?

Cuz my good ones are at the hotel. I. don't want to lose them. You don't want. to waste them. I don't want to lose. them. Yeah. I mean, I would have worn the good ones on. Theo's podcast. Jesus Christ. I'm. looking at your face when you turn. sideways so I can see how much. magnification you got. What are those? How many How many X you got? 250. That's. it. Yeah. Oh, okay. They're uh It looks. like I'm seeing a double the size of. your [ __ ] It look like you got stung. by a bee. Listen to me. Listen. Listen to me. You.

So it's already sold out. So people. can't buy tickets. It'll I'm sure it. sells out every year. That is beautiful. that you guys do that every year. The. Patrice benefit. Yeah, it's very cool. You talk about a guy that like touched. so many people because he was so. brilliant. Why? How could it be on a. Sunday? the Patrice B. It says May 18th. in my calendar. Maybe because Billy's. doing. uh 12 Angry Men, he's playing every. [ __ ] character. Uh no, he's in Glen. Gary Glenn Ross. Oh, is he? Yeah. And in.

Yeah, him and is he for closers? Is he. that guy? I don't know. Please go see. it. I'd rather [ __ ] walk through. Lebanon wearing wearing a [ __ ] Yamaka. and go see that [ __ ] angry hack. [ __ ] off, Billy. Shut the [ __ ] up. Send. me your stupid pro Palestinian [ __ ]. Shut up. Oh, does he have a lot of pro. Palestinian? Oh, we fight all the time. on He sends it to you. I Well, we on. text. We back and forth. You go, you and.

Bill Burr go back and forth about. Palestine for real. Sometimes. Yeah, sometimes. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. But I'm, you. know, look, I'm friends with them for. years. I mean, forever, you know. Yeah. [ __ ] Billy. You know, [ __ ] when. comedians get political and to the point. where they they distance themselves with. people that don't agree with them, that. to me is hilarious. Hilarious in how. stupid it is. Like, what are you doing? Like, what what are you doing? Like, this is this is where you're going to. [ __ ] draw the line on some [ __ ] that.

barely affects your personal life. I've. I've. not any of my friends that are like. that, I'm still friends with them. I. don't agree with a lot of the [ __ ] and. they're they're stupid. Yeah. You know, I mean, one or two people I think are. say really vile stuff and I just mute. them. I don't deal with them, you know? They're not friend friends, right? You. know, I mean, [ __ ] me and Norton don't. agree on everything, you know? How can.

you? I mean, his [ __ ] How can you. agree on everything? His wife is so much. hotter than my wife. She's got a better dick. She was the. best man at his wedding. [Laughter]. [ __ ] Norton is so quick and funny. It's He was the best man at my wedding. He's so [ __ ] funny. He's great on. Kill Tony. Oh my god. He's one of the. best guests. I mean, uh, you know who. else is [ __ ] Colin is so funny. He's. so quick. Colin's amazing. He's the He's.

There's a bunch of guys, and I think I. put you in there, too, that just never. really promoted themselves on social. media. Yeah. So, it's like you're really. good, but like even like Atel for the. level of comedy that he is, he should be. selling out stadiums every night. But he. just doesn't promote himself at all. All. he does is just like all of his. following is just word of mouth. Yeah. And other comics saying how great he is. And like people who have seen him. before, they've come to see him again.

Well, he's So, one of my videos now is. up to up to almost 5 million views. Is. that good? Yeah, it's good. That's good. It's really funny. I believe it. I. believe you're funny. If you want to. play it, I will. No, we don't have to do. that. Let's wrap this up. Um, so you're. going to be at the mothership. What What. are the dates again? June what? Uh, June, I think 27th, 28th, and 20. I do. it every week on my birthday. Take. pictures of you with your shirt off. It's going to be So, prepare for that. Get ready. Yeah. Get yourself in shape.

Tomorrow, I'm going to bring you to. Waste Well, get you on the peptides and. Oh, okay. Okay. Get your blood work and. find out what the [ __ ] going on with. your shoulder and shoot you up with stem. cells. I do have a special on Amazon. called Rich Voss Anonymous. It's pretty. funny. Why is it called Anonymous? Cuz I. taped it at NA convention. Oh, that's. hilarious. And the backdrop Bonnie. directed the beginning. The backdrop is. [ __ ] so cool. Here it is. Look at. you. Force Anonymous. You look good. there. You look dangerous man. You look.

dangerous. Can you play the trailer? No, we're not going to play a trailer. Okay, good. Uh, we're going to leave. Okay, we're gonna wrap this up. No, we don't. need to play a trailer. Okay, you're. funny. I was doing it for you. No, I. don't care about me. For you. I'm gonna. not do it. It's better. This. this uh I've done this podcast three. times and this is the most fun I had. It. was fun. It was fun. We had a good time. I I I had a good time. Um come to the. club tomorrow, too. We'll hang out. You.

got any sets tomorrow? You going. anywhere? All right. Come to the club. do bottom of the barrel, too. There's a. a whiskey barrel on stage with notes in. it from the audience. You pull them out. and you just riff. Oh, really? Yeah. You. love it. It's so much fun. It's like a. premise factory. So, what am I going to. do about this thing tomorrow? As soon as. we wrap, I'll I'll set it up as soon as. we get done here. All right. This was. fun. Thank you for having Rich Voss, ladies and gentlemen. Bye, everybody. [Music].