Joe Rogan Experience #1969 - Sam Tallent

Joe Rogan podcast check it out The Joe. Rogan Experience Train by day Joe Rogan. podcast by night all. day running Sam Talent get them. headphones and join the [ __ ] party. get the microphone up about like a fist. from your. face Jamie how's this do I sound. powerful and elegant thank you bro you. are powerful and elegant thanks man you. are enough I appreciate that I'm good.

enough I had a friend of mine and uh she. was asking me something just about. comedy and I go I just you know no one I. don't like my stuff no one likes their. stuff like you see it too much it just. like it gets in your head and you're. like you like got I look at it like a. hater and she goes I just want you to. know no matter what that you are enough. I go what I go no no no that's not what. I'm saying I'm not saying like like I. don't like my stuff like I have a. problem like crazy per no I'm was just.

like that's just the process yeah like I. feel good right like but that thing that. people say to people you are enough I. just want you to know that you are. enough look I don't need validation from. you lady she's a nice lady I'm sure. she's a nice lady she's a very nice lady. but I don't think you're going to her to. be like can you hold my hand through. this difficult period I think some. people do do that to people and they go. fishing for that kind of response yeah. that you are enough I'm like no no I'm. I'm okay it's like look I know look. around lady I kind of uh made Austin a. thing yeah I know I'm okay I mean it's.

sweet of her but no she's awesome I also. hate watching my [ __ ] dude it's that'd. be my Guantanamo is that making me watch. all my old specials yuck God damn it or. like a YouTube clip from like 2007. that's the thing that you have to do too. like um when working on new material I. either watch or listen to it have to. listen to it just have to I got to know. like what makes me grown what makes me. go yuck what's the cringe in there yeah. what's the yuck how do I cut the yuck. out of that yeah it's just like you're.

going to have that you're you got to. look at your act like you're a hater oh. for sure I do luckily I never have any. moments where I'm like oh this is. working out I watch and I'm like why is. your leg like that I can barely hear the. jokes I'm like Jesus Christ look at your. hair when did that. leave look how far that's receding Jesus. yeah have you always how long have you. been shaving your head. um 12 years yeah something like that I'm. going there man yeah it's way better. yeah yeah yeah you don't think about it. anymore it's like oh it's like one less.

thing to think about if you have a. good-shaped head I don't like PE some. people have flat heads like their head's. flat but now you got a new joke about. having a flat head yeah then I have to. turn around or have a mirror behind me. that's fine yeah it's all right give him. a little [ __ ] I'm going to get into. prop little look of the flat yeah no I. don't have a good head it's bumpy I. think if I shaved my head I would go. mutton chops I would leave the chops why. don't you go [ __ ] full Sufi. beard yeah just lower just the lower. beard like dag yeah right here yeah yeah. yeah Amish go underneath.

underneath right I think there's some. kind of like recessive Al where they're. not like God keeps them from having any. hair on their cheeks there's so many. Muslims who fight in the UFC who have. shaved heads and they grow a full ass. beard there's the Amish one that's. ridiculous so he is shaving it that [ __ ]. is not catching on with anybody no yeah. that's a weird middle ground right. because he could eat food with no. problem at all which is like kind of a. cop out you know what he's not eating. [ __ ] I don't think so they're not allow. to eat was he those guys forearms have.

you seen an Amish guy with his shirt off. they jerk off a lot I'm sure but they. have to do it they have to do it to. memory right yeah I think so like they. can't be watching porn no the Amish beer. typically wood. carvings uh what did you say because. Amish men shave their mustaches off you. may be wondering how now if an Amish are. allowed to shave while married men may. shave their mustaches only unmarried men. may shave their beards too the only. prohibition on shaving applies to the. Beards of married men oh okay so it's.

like a wedding ring so once you have a. full beard all the hoes need to leave. you the [ __ ] alone it's like taking Ladi. yeah he's taking [ __ ] that's why he's. growing this gross ass beard yeah God. forbid they see your chin isn't it funny. that you're on the marketplace if you. don't have a beard this guy out there. with no beard yeah you're swinging. you're peacocking yeah imagine the. [ __ ] Mrs Amish and Mr Amish have a. fight and he just watch this [ __ ] just. half of it just shaves his beard off. halfway out the door she starts crying. runs outside makes some butter real.

quick make some butter they don't have. any electricity they make their own. houses I dude those Amish the way they. raise houses so quick oh they're really. good at it yeah and then menites they're. you know they're like rough around the. edges I don't know any metan nightes but. I did meet one with Ari shafir at the. airport and I found out because she he. asked her what are you yeah classic Ari. oh no it wasn't at the airport I'm sorry. it was at a rest stop it was at a rest. stop in Massachusetts I think I think we. between gigs just driving to a gig what.

are. you what did you ask her what are you. yeah what what is that yeah just wearing. an outfit what's what's up with the. Bonnet which one are you it is [ __ ]. weird though man that it's it's you know. what's weird is that when people do a. really shitty job it's a cult when they. do a really good job it's a religion but. it's basically the same system that it. works on in the human brain yeah it. works on the same mechanisms.

like someone has all the answers and. they have a connection to a higher power. that's why you know one the things that. creeps me out about um uh atheism it's. not atheism itself it's that I think. that tendency to just find a group of. ideas that you will wholesale subscribe. to is like built into us I think it's a. cultural thing like war and I think when. people don't have that if if it's not. like if they don't have Christianity or.

Islam or Buddhism or Judaism whatever. they don't have they'll put it into. something else I think that I think it's. a normal part of being a person for some. strange reason well yeah it's we were. trying to find Community all the time. right we're seeking uh ways to like make. whatever our small group is uh be safe. and maybe work with other like-minded. groups and when it comes to like atheism. it's wild when people become fundamental. about that you know like when you're. devout to the idea of atheism it's like. exactly I don't think there's anything.

after this you know but I'm also not. going to like become an apostate from. any other ideas you know I don't know. why anybody would be sure one way or the. other oh I don't know cuz you have to be. I think unless some well it would help. you if you were yeah so the thing about. it like Jordan Peterson says this that. you should live your life as if God is. real and if you live your life as if God. is real you you will definitely live a. better life I was like that's a very. interesting way of thinking about it. because if you're wrong there's no cons. quences just you just die but if you're.

living that way at the very least you'll. have less anxiety oh for sure you'll. have more of a sense of purpose and you. probably do the right thing more often. because you'll be sort of like aiming to. that like looking to do like as a good. Christian like I know a lot of people. that are Christians that are really good. people and it's because they aim towards. that they think about that all the time. they think about what would God want me. to do they think about what does God. teach and they like they're aiming in.

that they're still human they're still. we're all [ __ ] for sure but they're. aiming in that direction let's underline. that we are all [ __ ] let's not forget. that the whole popul I don't like when. people do things uh because they are. trying to cash checks in heaven I do. like it when you're just doing it. because it's the right thing to do like. when a home when you give a homeless guy. five bucks and he's like God bless you. yeah I'm the kind of [ __ ] who's like. there's no God involved in this this is. one man trying to help one man I'm doing. this because I think it's going to. benefit you not because I'm [ __ ] you. know trying to get up to the big man. that's true but maybe he's saying God.

bless you like he's so happy that you. did that for him it's the he knows how. to say he really hopes good things. happen to you as well sure I know it's a. weird thing right because like you you. feel like if you buy into it you're. being a dupe you're getting duped you. know oh they got you they got you with. that nonsense what they get you with. that Mormonism [ __ ] yeah you think. you're going to get your own Planet when. you die stupid which is pretty cool. let's be honest if you're going to pick. one I have a friend in California and. she was a Mormon for a long time and uh.

she decided to stop being a Mormon and. when she decided to stop being a Mormon. one of the craziest things that she said. was she goes I realized that I was way. more vulnerable to like like weird culty. stuff like spirituality and yoga and. that kind she was I felt like because I. had accepted devout Mormonism my whole. life I hadn't questioned anything that. as an adult question like she left I. think she left in her late 30s or 40s so. as an adult like she just became.

vulnerable to like kind of husters. energy healers and you know that kind of. [ __ ] like it seemed like oh that makes. sense like that's that's what I'm. looking like there's a [ __ ] program. in our head where we want to believe. nonsense and whether that program is. attached to the Republican party or. whether it's attached to being a [ __ ]. Buddhist or being a did you see the. dolly Lama sucking on that kid's time. what the [ __ ] oh yeah could you SL a boy. in front of a bunch of people like a.

whole bunch of people what the [ __ ] you. thought you going to get away with this. what what the [ __ ] what the [ __ ] is that. I watched I was like this is wild oh I. remember they tried to cancel him a few. years back because uh he was talking. about marriage and they said you have. you took a vow salesy like how do you. feel about this and he's like I have so. many friends and uh they're married and. uh and then they get divorced and.

they're not happy and then the woman. takes all their money ha and this woman. said something to the tune of well you. know some women uh they make money too. he's like ah good. one five it was something something oh. sure now I've heard everything it was. one of those [ __ ] it was a weird. interview man but it was weird like he's. like paring out these tropes right you. know about uh marriage and divorce and.

it's really funny it's like cuz some of. them fail but this is supposed to be a. spiritual leader right he's supposed to. be like completely ascended and bigger. supposed to be he's supposed to be. saying that some marriages are wonderful. and beautiful cuz they are like for him. to say oh what I heard is they take your. money yeah well it's like your Dad's. friend who doesn't get laid anymore you. ever hang out with him at the bar you. know your Dad's friend who doesn't get. laid anymore doesn't have a video of him. sucking on a kid's tongue like what the. [ __ ] man he's probably a VHS.

he's he's got on laser disc it's what. did they record I don't think laser dis. record I have no idea I don't think they. did that's hilarious DOL Lama also said. at one point he was like we got to keep. uh Europe for Europeans yeah like too. many refugees are coming in that was. crazy I know like what the [ __ ] are you. saying man hey Dolly llama just let the. kids sit on your lap that's enough yeah. hey dude how about don't do that quit. smooching the kids in general yeah don't. tell a kid to suck your tongue yeah is.

there a not on camera that seems like. there should be jail time for something. like that like what is that I don't. think he can get in trouble in Tibet. sticking out one's tongue is known as a. traditional greeting stemming from a 9th. century myth about an unpopular king. with a black tongue his tongue the. Tibetans real revealing their tongues to. show they hadn't become as incarnate. whoa tongue sucking does not to be a. part of the. tradition that's where you crossed the. line if they just stuck tongues at each. other bro you you skated Scott free the.

pr team is working hard spin on that one. hard spin wa till Rachel madow gets a. hold of it she'll kind of win she'll. find a way it happened in February and. it's it came out like a week couple days. ago which is kind of weird so it's a hit. campaign against the Llama yeah it's. like a few weeks old I saw him talk once. sometimes it just takes a while for. something like that to catch sometimes. yeah but today I mean if it was Don. Lemon I would say yeah they're trying to. get rid of him but it was is the dolly. llama. out I have no idea why would have came.

out how do you get out to D doll Lama. was Bor like if it was like I don't even. mean to pick on Don Lemon I'm me saying. like someone who's on television it was. some like but even then it's like people. if they if that information's available. like if someone look how many people. were there yeah that's obviously like a. cell phone footage right is that what it. is well it was a fundraiser for some. kind of like Indian tech company how. Wild yeah how Wild just be kissing a kid. in front of everybody which is already. too much tongue kissing yeah suck on my. tongue what are you talking about I've.

never had a kid that close to my own. face where I could say suck on my tongue. isn't it interesting it's interesting. like what we choose to consider intimate. contact because hands like if he had. that boy's hand in his hand and he put. his hand over it and said I wish you a. wonderful happy life you're a beautiful. human being and just go out there and be. kind to everybody everybody that's cool. sweet gesture yeah sweet gesture when. you like fully hug someone you can hug. them for a couple seconds you got to let.

go uhh you can't like stand there for 10. minutes just like rubbing their back. people go hey hey hey Dolly llama let. the kid go your you violated the time. yeah you broke the time clock there's a. Time clock that goes when someone hugs. you get like a real good friend it's. like you got like a 10c countdown let it. linger 10c countdown 10 seconds is a. long time to be hugging someone oh it's. a lot ready here's 10 seconds and go so. here we are we're we're touching chest. to chest. D our genitals are near each other I can.

smell your neck right now we're still. hugging uh-huh all right now we're done. hugging oh man that's a kind of a hug. that's a long I've done that I've done a. 10-second hug with a good friend sure it. feels good but now with a little boy. that I don't know in the middle of. nowhere also how did that boy get in. there don't shut me this I don't want to. see this. again I don't want to see this that boy. snap back like a like a cobra ready to. [ __ ] strike yeah he's like why why. you making me suck your tongue you old. [ __ ] weirdo it's like when the noodle. hits your lips finally and it like snaps.

like the sound but what I'm getting at. is like it's it's interesting that like. kissing is such an intimate act like it. clearly is but I wonder how that got. even got started like people's breath. must have been horrible back in ter. rotting meat in there oh God no no. dentists your teeth all fell out uhhuh. and they most like they got knocked out. you probably got infections from cracked. teeth from getting hit with a rock you. know I bet a lot of people died from. like mouth infections sh yeah you're. like trying to eat everything you find. yeah you don't even know what's edible. yeah uhhuh and when did they start.

kissing I don't know let's find that out. let's take a guess when do you think. kissing was invented what if it was like. 1900 yeah whenever France became a. country what if like nobody kissed until. like the 1900s it was a revolution I'm. going to guess I'm going to guess it's. like some Mesopotamia [ __ ] for sure yeah. I'm going to guess that it started like. thousands cradle of civilization I'd say. pre pyramids pre who yeah strong yeah. strong gu what else did you have to do. back then you make a toothbrush like why. would you kiss somebody that seems crazy.

figuring out what holes are safe you. know true yeah but you could wash the. body off like eating [ __ ] and [ __ ]. and stuff that kind of makes sense you. just want to get crazy I think [ __ ]. happened before sex did I bet you went. mouth first no there was a fur covered. hole down there you're going to try and. jam up in that thing watch chimps chimps. [ __ ] each other watch all right I bet. you have oh yeah been down that road. let's let's so your guess is pre-. dynastic Egypt so sure 5,000 PID but.

yeah yeah well that's like 5,000 years. ago like supposedly they don't even. really know um what do you think Jamie. I've got two answers I was trying to. figure out which what was your question. you didn't have one no no um the first. answer Google gives back is the first. recorded kiss is 1500 BC which sounds. recent interesting it's very recent. right below that is a link to a longer. piece that says some researchers believe. that kissing began millions of years ago. as a result of mouth to- mouth feeding.

interesting and that's going into like. well why didn't interesting everybody do. it then cuz you had to chew the food for. the child do you know that you can get. syphilis from kissing. people no I didn't either I saw it on a. Tik Tok video must be true how dirty is. that mouth it was a you it was a uh. Instagram re that's what it was um no he. was like having this guy standing there. and all these different girls were. coming by and kissing him and he was. pointing out all the different types of. diseases that you can get from mouth. kissing someone yeah herpes and syphilis.

and gonorrhea all these different things. you get from mouth kissing people I. thought it was just herpes that was my. biggest fear I thought so too this guy I. dodged that bullet this guy figured out. a way to scare the [ __ ] out of everybody. and they're never going to kiss again. I'm going to keep kissing I'm still. smooching my old lady when I get home. well you're married but if you're some. wild dude at the bar you might die. secondly kissing can also transmit. syphilis which may present as an oral. can what is that canker.

canker uh T padium can invade mucous. membranes through abrasion therefore. oral CH Chantry canker it is canker. right can result from kissing with a. syphilis patient therefore kissing with. a oh with a syphilis patient if you're. that horny and you're in the [ __ ]. hospital with them like come on just one. kiss that deleted scene from Patch Adams. he's smooching all the sailors when they. get back from he's like they don't have. much time to live trying to make them. feel better yeah they need this they. give them some love mhm yeah mean what. the [ __ ] you're on a deathbed I would.

smooch someone on the deathbed easy yeah. yeah especially if you love them yeah. worried about a little syphilis they. cure that now also there's no way that. I'm not dying before my wife so you know. that's is your wife healthy oh yeah what. is that supposed to mean Joe not that. healthy Sam I'm okay I think you're a. comedian I Amed very funny guy thank you. most funny guys are out of their [ __ ]. minds yeah and it presents itself in a. bunch of different ways so when you say. something like that it kind of opens the. door for me to say would that be Sam you.

think I'm in here wearing this 4 XL. sweatshirt in the Austin heat because. I'm confident about my body well I think. it's just cuz you don't have a sweet. Brody t-shirt I don't dude positive push. yeah I think if you saw me nude you'd go. huh no I think I'd go I've seen that. before you think so sure I like to think. I have a unique situation under here you. don't no what I'm like average American. at the beach it's normal I'm very good. at the beach water is not a problem for. me dude it's those sailing vessels that. keep trying to Harpoon me when I was a.

kid my buddy Jimmy his dad used to be. able to go to the ocean and he was he. drank a lot of beer and he would float. he literally float dude like this dude. was living the life I was like maybe. it's worth it being fat just for that. I'm so buoyant he would go there and. just get out in the ocean and float and. I would sink like a [ __ ] rock I like. kind of kind of jealous well I'm glad to. hear you're jealous of me Joe you're. kind of jealous that you could just. float you know what a fun move for me. laying on the sand and the waves. crashing me and spinning me like a nude.

egg that's my favorite thing to do in. the world man that's nice do you wear. goggles or you just take it raw I'll. wear some goggles yeah you don't want. that salt water in your eyes right does. that [ __ ] bother you uh I go I go open. eyes I'll go open eyes in a hot tub like. a freak whoa yeah that's how you can. syphilis that's how you get like. chlorine in your eyeballs uhhuh I'm okay. with it yeah yeah chlorine can be good. for you right I have a chlorine pool. like we were talking with David Cho the. other day and he says he's got some new. [ __ ] that does like what it Ed. oxygenated oxygenated water is like okay.

okay yeah I mean whatever works right. it's already oxygen in there but yeah so. you can breathe the. water my pool guy said it's hard to do a. saltwater one out here in Texas though. he said that uh there's something about. the heat and humidity it's like you're. going to be like still dosing it up with. chlorine yeah cuz that algae just grows. a lot of my best moments are aquatic. honestly really I excel on land I'm not. that great but you get me submerged you. ever heard the Aquatic ape Theory oh. yeah yeah that yeah yeah I think I'm.

proof I think I'm a AAL tail there's. like a lot of interesting things that. are attached to it like the idea that. babies come out like so full of fat. whereas other babies of other primates. are like seny and muscular and they they. they can take care of themselves way. quicker than we can yeah we're frail. yeah we're super frail yeah we're just. soft little mus we're super frail but is. that the price you pay for being so. [ __ ] smart I think you need it has to. balance out yeah if we were just apex. predator and also to tie our shes right.

but that's why we associate like Meads. with being stupid right you know yeah. that's no good it's tough when a meat. head is also like uh very well-learned. because then there's just like a bunch. of stuff to be jealous of you know like. the first time we met I don't know if. you remember this we were in front of. your beautiful comedy club and it was. Tim Dylan was there and we went to shake. hands it was my first time I met you and. we shook like this what do we do my. fingers oh my fingers were yeah and I. was like well I just blew it I don't.

even remember it oh I do I've thought. about it a lot Joe yeah no I was like. well that's not how you shake hands as a. human being guess what we just did it. again you want some of that it felt good. what is that marijuana I'm good man you. scared of that [ __ ] I used to smoke it. 24/7 what happened I started having. panic attacks oh yeah it started giving. me like heart attack symptoms those are. fun no I wrote it out too I tried for. like three years after that [ __ ] started. happening I would just be like getting. high in a car and I'd feel like. something flutter in my chest and I'd be. like well this is how I go down waiting. in line at Chick-fil-A maybe it was the.

wings of angels it could have been yeah. yeah it was that LDS lady that Mormon. lady who loves snake oil so much she. believes in Capricorns in the arms of. the Angels that's what it is that's the. flittering that's the flittering inside. of you I mean when I go down I'm going. to go down in a you think you're. thinking about it of course all the time. how often how old are you now 35 you. look good for 35 come. on come on Joe. what the [ __ ].

man I see through this what AG you. pushing for I would like to hit 70. that'd be sick oh you could do that yeah. yeah well cuz the meat's not marbled the. way you think it is like yes there is. this like top soil of soft doughy fat. but underneath there is some bulk yeah. did you do Sports as a kid oh yeah you. exercise it all now were you all state. and what All State football no [ __ ] yeah. wow yeah me and Shane would have been a. hell of an offensive line why you and. Shane get together and [ __ ] snap each. other in shape Shane's actually gotten.

into shape a lot better yeah he's. starting to look bulky again look big. he's obsessed with his bicep guns CH. guns they're pretty big I know big guy. and like there's this uh there's this. like cage fighter in Arkansas that used. to open for me Chris Pierce and uh he. like made me buy weights during pandemic. because he just like body shamed me to. the point of me being like well it's. either this or a bullet and a gun you. know so I got in there and I've been. like uh you know deadlifting and [ __ ]. and uh everything with my legs it's the.

upper body that I fear because it's so. weak well you get into shape buddy all. I'm trying I want to live okay as I. light a cigar 130 we can help you I know. people in Denver yeah there's a lot of. good gyms in Denver I know I live in for. Collins now oh how far is that an hour. okay I'm also on the road all the time. so it's really hard to be a human being. when you're It's hard out there yeah the. road is tricky like you got to like you. got to treat it like work she's a fickle. [ __ ] the road when you get into that. hotel room you want to take a nap but.

you really can't you really got to go to. the gym well you want a nap after you. whack that too you want a pull PUD and. then you want a nap you I know I need a. nap that's when I'll give me old T Ry I. gave it up gave up eatting off I got to. save it for my wife I got to give her my. Essence I get it yeah trying to make a. kid no you just want good a good volume. well yeah that's what I'm worried about. is heft of load I want it to be a bulky. deposit imagine if that like your your. self-esteem was connected to the size of.

your. load when you're a lad it is dude I mean. but sort of yeah not so crazy like if. it's a big one it's like whoa but if. it's like a regular one it doesn't like. bum you out no in fact I'm excited when. it's little are you really yeah it's. less of a mess a there you go cuz when. you're in a hotel you know where it goes. that's right yeah yeah you got to shower. off immediately immediately yeah you. just glaze the ham and then you go hop. in the shower just do a gator roll in. the sheets. it's up to you it's totally up to you.

make it the Hiatt problem yeah but then. you have that sheet stuck to you and you. look like The Dumpling paper well not. you but my body you know just live in. shame I do just live in shame that's. what we do accept it if I was confident. I wouldn't be funny you know it's the. craziest part of this whole thing well. it's definitely like a motivating factor. right yeah yeah it's interesting like. the different motivating factors that. people get into when they get into. comedy. like what what year were you when you. thought about doing it dude there's like.

uh video of me as like a two or. three-year-old sliding into the kitchen. on my knees saying I just flew in from. Vegas and boy my arms tired it was like. a preconceived like there's no thought. I'd have no memory of not wanting to be. a comedian wow what year were you what. uh how old were you rather when you. first tried it 2005 I was 18 wow that's. a good time yeah I started when I was 21. because I thought you had to wait until. you were 21 to get into the get the bars. then I met a guy there was 19 I was like.

how'd you get in here mhm and he's like. yeah just got to tell him that you know. you're here to just do comedy and they. make sure you don't drink they X your. hands you stand like by the door I did. all that [ __ ] too yeah the Squire Lounge. the Lion's lirer in Denver when I was. starting that's great yeah what a good. time to start dude it was perfect and. also girls were involved now and all of. a sudden I was like you know desirable. cuz you're funny cuz you're funny yeah. yeah yeah and then you're also like. bridee and you just I have this like all.

consuming romance to my life you know. and uh well there's a thing about. someone who's obsessed with a goal it's. very it's very attractive to people. because it's like secretly what. everybody kind of wants to be in some. not everybody but a lot of people want. to be in some ways like really dedicated. to some dream yeah a great video that we. put up on the mothership uh Instagram. site and it's Bill Burr and Bill Burr is. talking about oh yeah you know that. video yeah where so let's play Let's. play it because it's [ __ ] what he.

says is. amazing it it's and it like speaks to. every comic who got through that and. made it and every comic who's in the. middle of it right now it's on mine too. you could find it on mine you don't it. always leads to something better always. reset it because you said don't starving. artist you don't hurt yourself going for. a dream who's when you go after a dream. here it is you don't it always leads to. something better always all right right. starving artist I slept on a futon until.

I was 36 I don't [ __ ] regret any of. it I was dating this woman and I said I. had a spot I had to go do and it paid $8. at the comic strip during the week. Tuesday night I went down there and I. came back I tried on a new bit and I was. doing a and afterwards I was at home in. my apartment and I was doing this silly. dance in the kitchen cuz I had a new bit. and I was psyched because I had gone. through this period where I wasn't. coming up with any new material and she.

was laughing and then she got a sad look. on her face and I said what's the matter. and she said I wish I had a. job where I only got paid $8 yet I came. home and I did a silly dance in the. kitchen the responsible thing to do is. to listen to your. heart it wasn't hard to work at the. shitty job because I was always thinking. about the exciting job I was going to do. afterwards and every night that I just. went up on stage and if it just went. moderately okay I couldn't believe it I. couldn't I I have to be honest with you.

like I I I couldn't [ __ ]. believe that I was actually doing it. that I was actually I had a dream and I. was making it happen and I still. remember the first time I. really went on stage and I actually got. in the zone for what was considered a. zone at the level comic I was and I only. was in the zone for about 8 Seconds. [Music].

um I was at Nick's comedy stop in. Framingham on Route 9 it doesn't even. exist. anymore and. um I just got on this roll of laughter. that I was actually able to. pause and [ __ ] be in the moment and. enjoy it rather than being like Oh my. God what's my next joke what's my next. joke and. um that [ __ ] feeling can carry you. through a [ __ ] shitty job for a week. Freddy Stone excitable boy it's what he.

went by I did a room for him and he gave. me $5 gas money I probably spent 10 to. get there and I couldn't [ __ ] believe. it and I was like I did that and they. gave me this I couldn't [ __ ] believe. it at what point just listen to the. sound of my voice as I'm talking about. this have you ever had that level of. excitement doing any other [ __ ] job. that's what it's like when you you you. go after uh a dream job so. so.

nothing nothing is worse than not going. after it yeeha gets me [ __ ] fired up. dude ye [ __ ] ha yes I had no regrets. I was eating out of dumpsters I was. sleeping on Floors you ate out of. dumpsters hell yeah dude what'd you get. out of a dumpster you'd go to 7-Eleven. and you would get when they threw out. the chicken wings and the pizza would. you like did you time it so as it hit. the the dumpster you can get in there. quick there was a. you know there was about a half hour to. an hour when he knew it was going to hit.

the dumpster what's the best thing you. ever got out of a dumpster croissants. damn and bagels and Upstate in the. package still no they were on trash yeah. oh no yeah oh NOS right but also I. didn't have a job you know what was the. trash that they were on though was were. we talking cardboard boxes some boxes or. we talking food and coffee grounds and. [ __ ] yeah it was every it was all sorts. you know oh boy yeah but I didn't have. to wake up at any time you know it was a. survival mechanism because I was. attacking standups so hard wow yeah. sleeping on the ground taking Greyhounds.

all that [ __ ] now you look back and. you're like that's romantic I remember. the bus days yeah I took I did the bus. to at least two gigs that I can remember. I like oh my god when you're on the bus. man you're on just like who knows how. many cereal killers are with you who. knows how many [ __ ] up people are on. that bus I was the only white boy on a. bus from Houston to Lafayette Louisiana. how was that it was awesome it was a. mobile party dude it was like a cameo. video yeah cuz I was sitting in the back. and then the bus loaded up and uh people. were passing around bottles of gin and I.

had a weed hash pen so as soon as that. gin bottle hit me they all like looked. at me and I was like and then I hit the. weed pen and blew it out and everyone. was like all right and then the pen. circulated by the time I got off that. bus I was blackout drunk but boy was I. invited to a lot of. barbecues yeah that's awesome it was. awesome man that's awesome yeah yeah. they do Church better they do buses. better yeah black folks got a lot of. stuff figured out that white people. haven't figured out yet yeah we're so. uptight man well their church is Def. more fun there's no more fun in America.

than the black churches they they dance. and sing and that's why you I'm sure. you've seen that video of uh Biden at a. black church and just standing there. like not KN everybody's like having a. great [ __ ] time my favorite video. from a black church ever is the I'm not. gay no more dude slam dunk that guy that. guy deserves a goddamn Academy Award for. just for just the entertainment value of. that video and the acting cuz he was. clearly still gay. he's delivered bro I'm not gay no more I.

am. delivered look at him like men no more. look at how he's dancing. wom wom and the my my favorite part is. when everybody dances with them and they. do like one of the gayest things ever. they surround them like a gang bang and. he loves it there's like 30 guys around. him look at his complex bow tie that bow. tie is outrageous for a straight.

man I am. deler it's again what you play think. it's on a loop why why are you lying in. church that's the same way that a. 12-year-old boy that is straight lies. about getting [ __ ] where he's like I've. had [ __ ] women women women women all. kinds bro yeah they they're all dancing. together uhhuh I think he uh came out. recently and was like that was a lie I'm. still very Instagram account good for. him good for him cuz that's what's.

[ __ ] up about that is that like if you. want to get accepted in that religion. they have a a thing about gay people. like in a lot of religions not just that. one not just Christianity but so Andrew. calwell Mr delivered it spelled wrong. that's. hilarious delivered but that's the best. way to say it I am delivered that's good. branding that's not bad now we helped. him give him a little boost it's just. [ __ ] that you can't both religious and. gay like what come on gay guys are super.

fun black guys are super fun gay black. guys oh my God oh my God greatest Church. of all time it's The Great Well church I. think they call that the club that's. true too it's just a foam party yeah. dude when we uh lived in Hollywood right. down the street from The Comedy Store. was boy toown and if you drove there on. the way to the 405 is a [ __ ] it's five. blocks of party and it's going off. they're going off randomly see dudes. with like chaps on cowboy hats with no. shirt just kissing on the street wearing.

sunglasses at 3:00 a.m. yeah I always. joke around about it but it's like five. blocks of no one saying no mhm because. it's all Yang no Yin and no one can get. pregnant suck my tongue it's a lot of. that how okay here's the suck my tongue. thing here's the problem with that video. here's the problem with that the whole. the dolly llama thing cuz the the. tinfoil hat forchan style conspiracy. theory is that there's Elite pedophiles. that run the world right. and I was I'm always reluctant to buy.

into that but then I watch a few. documentaries and then I read a few. cases and then I you you hear about the. Epstein Island thing and then you know. he gets out of it the first the Franklin. Scandal there's a bunch of those and you. go how like does that still exist like. is it happening right now yeah is it and. someone's going to uncover it we the. Catholic Church uhhuh how crazy is that. the dolly l. the dolly llama I mean who knows you. know maybe just yeah I don't want.

to maybe just thinks it's fun it's funny. and silly it was a bit yeah a little. funny thing we've all bombed boy we've. all had a boy suck our tongue yeah if. you thought it was going to get a laugh. yeah if he kill it's a good closer yeah. just a freak shock jock stuff yeah. exactly he's like Bubba the Love Sponge. I like Bubba I got nothing against Bubba. it's a hilarious name Bubba's a good guy. yeah um maybe it's. um I think that it's legit man yeah.

maybe but is it chicken or the egg right. right right did some that's the thing. that people always say about whatever. it's uh child molesters in particular. that someone did it to them right and. that. they're yeah and they're somehow or now. paused in that stage of their emotional. development where they got raped uhhuh. it's like when you hear like an adult. woman who still talks like a 9-year-old. girl you're like oh no ooh what happened. here some girlss do that just to play.

dumb With You Ren uhhuh boy do I fall. for that and then you hear them on the. phone with their account whoa so you. have an accountant where are you [ __ ]. me why how come she can talk so well. when she's around me she play she plays. D that'd be a great move for a girl like. to like you know go after some old. billionaire uhhuh and Cole Smith oh well. I don't think she played I think that. was like a real clear transactional. agreement dude she got me going as a. young but. she was hot as [ __ ] bro there's so much.

woman so much woman so much that was a. big old Texas woman yes that was like. 160 pounder I I'd bet 220 by the end. yeah the end is not what I'm going on. I'm going on the end I'm going on the. thicker days yeah when I could actually. get. her when I had a shot the end if you. just had a bag of pills she'd been yours. oh yeah you just sh that's her in the. early early days yeah look yeah she was. lovely but I'm talking deathbed Anna. Nicole Smith boy that's that's her a. little larger she's punishing that guy's. lap that's what I'm talking about that.

getting hurt yeah when your femur are. sore his thigh he's going to get Nerf. damage from that that's dangerous God. damn dude she was super hot when she was. young I think top to bottom I see no. Faults in her yeah well she's um [ __ ]. genetic specimen and then there's a lot. of uh U you know. intervention thank you for bringing me. back them isn't that fascinating that. like big giant fake tits are so. attractive to men and it's so obvious. it's like the most obvious trick of all. time the most obvious trick yeah like.

you we know 100% of the time when. they're fake and no one cares well we. also love up close magic and we know. that's a ruse yeah but up close magic is. like way more deceptive yeah you know. they're really good I had David you know. what I'm saying like what is he doing. David bla freaked me the [ __ ] out man. because he did Jim's good at spot in. this [ __ ] too and Jamie sat there goes. I'm just going to watch everything he. does I'm going to keep my eyes on him. and I'm going try to Fig out what he's. doing and he could not figure it out and. the dude rolled his sleeves up too to.

show it was wild [ __ ] he he was doing. some wild [ __ ] he was doing some slide. of hand that was like he might he might. know real witchcraft this might be like. one of them comic book Things guy makes. a living like being a magician but he's. actually a wizard uhuh like legitimately. G still had to pay the bills didn't you. feel like that I felt he's a wizard yeah. it's not real he's not a real person I. also didn't want to know cuz then it. ruins it that does dude yeah but then he. made me things that was like totally. real like when I stuck that uh metal rod.

through his skin I'm like I know what. you're doing you just can deal with pain. did you see what happened to him. recently in his show in Vegas no two. accidents happened oh no with Blaine. yeah one the first one was crazy but. then another one happened first one you. know the uh it's an illusion if you will. there's like a spike and then there's. like bags or cups over one of the spikes. and you got to like oh fig out [ __ ] he. pulled someone from the crowd and they. picked the wrong one and his hand went. right through it no a guy in the. audience did it was a woman but yeah oh.

no a woman's hand no no put his hand. through it oh not from the audience. sorry uh and then another one he jumped. off of a very high thing into boxes and. hit the ground and separated his. shoulder and had to have doctors from. the crowd come in and try to like put it. back in place oh no on on like in the. middle of the show it took like an hour. oh no sounds like a work a separated. shoulder that's what it sort of seems. that way cuz I've seen enough of his. show I don't think so man I think he's a. fascinating guy really [ __ ] smart.

dude and really nice guy too and he is. obsessed with like first of all the the. slight of hand [ __ ] it's it's insane. right Jamie oh yeah yeah know for sure. tell me like when you were watching it. tell me you weren't like absolutely. Blown Away there's extra stuff going on. that you can't even you'd have to break. it down for about an hour or two with. someone you have to watch him on. highspeed video and then slow it down to. like a couple frames a second here's the. jumping accident I don't want to watch.

this well you you can barely tell what. happens oh dud dude I can tell what. happens that's a that's Fear Factor bro. that shit's. ridiculous glad he wore a lav mic for. that they they edited together this. video I guess but Jesus Christ he was in. pain there so he's a skilled magician. and he's also like willing to hurt and. he also was willing to like stand on ice. for 3 days what the [ __ ] did he do also.

that's not magic though Nei was standing. on Ice thing yeah he did a lot of those. weird things there's a magic to that. though that's like mind over matter it's. like an ancient kind of magic time. before language if it was real mind over. matter you could do it forever it's not. mind over matter it's just will you just. have to be able to tolerate extreme cold. and just deal with it and you do. breathing exercises to force your body. heat warmer but then there's also like. the contact of your skin versus the cold.

that'll eventually you get a thermal. layer one of the things that happens. when you put ice on something is it. develops a thermal layer your skin gets. really red underneath it if you uh ever. look at your arm when you uh pull the. ice off yeah like it's all red you know. when you get out of an ice bath your. Skin's super red yeah and that's what's. going on you develop a thermal layer I. look like a newborn baby after ni I'm so. pink I think the same thing is probably. uh probably applies to that I think.

you're after a while the parts that are. touching the ice it doesn't bother you. as much anymore like whether it's the. bottom of your feet you could get Frost. be exactly did he have uh anything on. under his feet he when he did the Ice he. was clothed oh okay well that makes more. sense yeah probably have to be so your I. your body doesn't touch the ice it's. just. encased Yeah so basically he went full. and C man if you have like I don't know. what he was wearing right but you can. wear some stuff that's remarkably warm. uh even if it gets wet um like Marino.

wool oh yeah yeah you can wear like a. Marino wool layer he could have like a. thick layer like what is he wearing when. he was in the ice he shirtless right. there yeah he start taking does he go. out to take a leak three days no that's. the only way he warms up buried alive. block of ice for two days so he's in a. block of ice shirtless for two days. seems like he took it off cuz he has uh. so he's like man it's hot as [ __ ] in. here yeah you sure that's not Drake. he's a handsome fellow isn't he oh yeah. look at his body legendary [ __ ] getter.

this guy look at David Blain's body oh. yeah quick look on that like Jesus you. sexy [ __ ] yep super like I said super. nice guy too that's how I see myself in. my head that's that's how I think I look. up top by the way he was doing magic. tricks for everybody yeah he did them. for my daughter came over he did it for. her he was doing it for Security Guys. he's doing it for everybody it was. amazing yeah it's really dope and no one. no one figured out what the [ __ ] he's. doing no but like said you can't look. into it he let you film ruins it. I felt bad I did I he didn't say.

anything I don't think he bitched out he. bitched out that's what he just said I. just heard I bitched out if I got the. video of him [ __ ] from right behind. which like he didn't approve that would. that's true from behind is [ __ ] you. can't but if you can get him from the. front and see the hands moving he was. showing someone else the thing and I. walked up behind him with my camera out. and I was like ah this feels couldn't he. make the footage disappear he can make. Jamie disappear yeah he Island oh yeah. you'd love it down there Jamie yeah. there's something I found there's a.

video recently about this Epstein Island. thing uh I was trying to figure this out. the show without without showing what. they showed I was trying to prove it if. you go back on Google Maps this this pot. right here which used to be a tennis. court let me put on the screen it looks. like there were dungeons the digging of. some kind of multiple small holes little. Graves tiny Graves let me show you the. what let me show you the thing the. picture. wait a minute wait a minute wait a. minute wait a minute no first of all why.

would you do that when you have the. ocean right there that doesn't make any. sense also one of those creeps doesn't. want to eat the kid after he [ __ ] it. but if you drop someone a dead body in. the ocean I would think that would be a. way better way of disposing a dead body. yeah for sure then you have Chum yeah. and but no no one's going to notice it. no God oh it's trans hold on hold on I. like how there's directions no there's. over it's over time see that's how it. used to look right and that's how it. kind of looks now okay like they buried. they put up this weird wall right it's. like a May okay um trying to find the.

picture I. saw where is this some 4chan [ __ ] A a. little bit 100% that's why I was that's. why I was trying to find a little bit a. little bit 100% Jamie just went full q. and on that's where all the good stuff. comes from where we go one we go all he. went all. in you're through the Looking Glass. jie there's still I feel like there's. still stuff up with this that we're not. saw a dude recently with a jacket on. like a bomber jacket that said where we.

go when we go all no dude yes you got to. give up man went all in you guys lost I. met some lady I met some lady in um in. Aspen and uh she was with her her. daughters she was like in her probably. early 60s and uh she comes up she I love. you I am so I'm like oh thank you that's. so nice to you she goes and Donald. Trump's our real president I'm like he's. definitely. not and his daughter's her daughter. rather were crying they were laughing so. hard they're like our mom's crazy I'm.

like your mom's. crazy so we call her Qing on Mom all. weekend keep an eye out for queing on. mom when we're on the town it's crazy. that was nice lady very nice lady sounds. sweetheart of a lady yeah that was the. thought she had to communicate to you. she just wanted to let me know I'm a. patriot as well like oh no what if I I. got to like look at some of them Tik Tok. Clips yeah people getting the wrong. impression me he [ __ ] was a Bernie. Sanders supporter I know these people. are so silly yeah people love to [ __ ].

try and make people into what they. aren't oh my God they try to force them. into a narrative well it's for me it's. just cuz first of all it's it looks like. I should be I'm I'm a meat head you know. I'm covered in tattoos and I do cage. fighting commentary and I'm a dirty. comedian there's no way you're. Progressive and offensive. comedy yeah but so you get you get just. lumped in I know but it's fun to be. lumped in it's fun because one thing. that happens is people like severely. underestimate your ability to like have.

a conversation with them about things if. they're cocky and shitty yeah you know. like some some people just say things. they don't even know what they're. talking about they're just like. repeating a narrative and you say. actually that's not true and here's why. it's not true and then you see this like. look of panic when they realize that. they're they're going on assumption so. they went back on the land here and this. was in 2006 that's what it like what the. [ __ ] which is when obviously he was they. were there and stuff was going on still. bro and those aren't just like where.

baby turtle eggs were laid. or way seems like it's pretty high up I. think those that's where the tapes are. buddy that's what T I I wouldn't say. bodies I would say if you're going to. bury bodies you'd bury them in the ocean. or you burn them you take them to the. yeah you could do that you could you. could burn them and take them out to the. ocean like why would you when you have. the best place to get rid of a body ever. why would you put the shittiest place to. get rid of a body Shallow Grave shallow. grave in a very obvious place where. people could photograph it with.

satellites when you're already some sort. of intelligence operation like get the. [ __ ] out of here when you have mad. behind you you're going to do popper. Graves yeah and last you're so cocky. like [ __ ] put them anywhere who gives. a [ __ ] who cares we're Untouchable last. things I remember hearing when he died. was that he had a big giant cement truck. shipped out to the island and before. damning expose was released paying. machine up for machine up front so it. would arrived quicker as experts say he. could have Lally covered up evidence oh. Jesus that is bad branding pedophile.

Island they should have fought for. something different you know that. Island's still for sale yeah yeah we had. we had discussions about purchasing it. for a podcast. Island about doing the podcast in that. big uh mosque what is it what does he. have that temple temple yeah that temple. dude this is the thought you the. Temple's beautiful on the outside it's. like the colors of the Israeli flag. soundproof in there already there's no. way he's. he has a [ __ ] building the color of. the Israeli flag that's like I mean.

that's like if you went to Kid Rock's. house and a [ __ ] a giant billiard. Hall that covered in an American flag. from the roof right that's that like. makes sense this guy literally this is. how much he supports Israel he turned. his [ __ ] Temple into an Israeli flag. it's on the nose so on the nose if you. put that in a script they'd be like yeah. so the knows let's um we would have to. hire a couple Jews for representation. because I mean we want to make sure that. this is appropriate just have Ari live. there yes Ari can Ari will run the.

island Ari needs a podcast studio and he. likes to be away from people so maybe. that's actually a good spot for you're. doing him a favor yeah yeah it's. probably a good idea and it's a write. off but if you if you bought pedophile. Island um you would have to destroy all. the buildings cuz I'm sure they're all. bugged to hell with some high tech [ __ ]. that you you're never going to be able. spot there's a camera in every toilet in. there which would be terrible for. comedians they talk so much [ __ ] try to. be. yeah and if you got audio that but then. again it's one thing if you're on the.

pedophile Island but if you riff and use. the nword it's all over for you and. here's the other thing with um AI today. how would you even know what's real how. the [ __ ] would you even is this it these. guys snuck up there I don't know when oh. my God look at that place yes bro that. place is dope that looks almost Alex gry. style look how beautiful it is it is. it's really just a facade but we don't. know what's underneath it CU that door. is not real right door's not real. the doors painted it could be Jr there's. a window that see JRE yeah JRE so you.

can see there's a window there okay so. inside shitty window yeah and so inside. is that area where we'll set up the. tables and we're going to need elon's. help to get like solid satellite Wi-Fi. out there nice you could just project. Tim Dylan's face on the side of it. that's kind of small for a studio we. might have to expand yeah make some more. window it was built for kids this. is they didn't have adults they didn't. have adults in mind when they built that.

thing no if you think that's small you. should see the cages imagine if you go. in there it's a bouncy house it's a ball. pit son of a [ __ ] I have to take my. shoes off still kids you guys want to go. to the ultimate bouncy house I'm talking. on an island on a private island just a. bouncy house you want to go where Mr. Chuck-E-Cheese lives you know Alex Jones. told me about that place a long time ago. it was one of the things that Alex tells. you stuff and he'll say like all these. things that make and then they'll tell. you one where you go wait a minute this.

was one of the wait a minutes there's an. island they take them they they have. underage girls and they they they. compromise him sexually he like what. it's like he's here these guys hung out. there apparently these guys hung out on. the island I mean this is posted toid. two years ago same video oh wow they're. they just kept going back snooping. around yeah well I bet there's no one. there like who the [ __ ] wants to be the. guy guarding pedophile Island who's the. grounds keeper probably nobody wants to. go there I bet you can go there how come. taggers haven't showed up yet. you guys are really just depressing me. your lack of ambition so easy just tag.

downtown LA get out to pedophile Island. and leave your [ __ ] Mark you think a. moving subway car is cool get out there. tag up the temple imagine if we put that. out there in the world cut. to taggers and [ __ ] speedboats with. like giant sacks of spray paint or. headed towards pedophile Island just. says Bert ker is fat. yeah uh I know guy was a tagger uh in La. he's uh he's an interesting guy and he's.

really good at it he makes cool [ __ ]. like it's cool it's an art form it's. illegal you shouldn't do it you're doing. it to people's houses and [ __ ] and. property well most of them don't do it. to houses and property they do it to. like a banded buildings which is fine. and they do it to like like structures. under the LA River which like who the. [ __ ] is going down there yeah a lot of. bridge pillars and [ __ ] the LA River is. a weird thing Manz it's barely a river. you know what it really is it's an. excuse to pollute the ocean yeah that's. really what it is how so because it runs.

it's covered in cement it's just a big. cement thing and it runs straight into. the ocean so anytime it rains all the. [ __ ] from all the streets gets in that. water all the [ __ ] and then that [ __ ]. goes out into the ocean there was a guy. that I used to take yoga with he was a. yoga instructor from Australia in. Australia he surfed all the time and so. when he came to America that's one of. the reasons why he wanted to teach out. here on the coast or out there on the. coast is that he could surf all the time. and no one told him to not surf after.

the rain oh [ __ ] because apparently when. you surf after like heavy like it's been. raining like now all the pollution from. all the oil and all the cars and all the. [ __ ] bottles and cans and everything. use needles it all just goes out that. big giant cement trough into the ocean. just a bunch of spec scrip see if you. can find what it looks like what the LA. River looks like this this is where they. like the big concrete enclos. all the F the Furious movies exactly a.

lot of times it's dry and sometimes and. people fishing it videos fishing in it. and catching the fish and eating them no. what's in there carp gar I don't know. what's in there probably carp probably. carp and maybe some other like bluegills. or something like that maybe I don't. know I don't know what's in there but. this guy catches them and Cooks them and. eats them and uh it's really disturbing. cuz like I know you're doing this for. the grand buddy but you might from this. like who the [ __ ] knows what's in that. water not me so this is the LA River.

it's really bad god dude look at this. they're just pulling giant chunks of. [ __ ] there's so much trash and so the LA. River when it runs into the ocean this. [ __ ] dude was out there surfing and. he said dude he goes man I got really. really sick yeah like he goes I I just. was really bedridden I felt terrible and. then people told him yeah man you can't. he's like oh great it's after the rain. perfect no out here Great Waves you know. kind of Stormy uhhuh but no buddy you.

got to stay the [ __ ] out of there oh my. god dude it's really weird man Cruz. rescue a man from the rain swollen LA. River oh the guy got trapped he was down. there fishing I wonder what happened he. probably fell in man he probably drunk. that's every time I fall in a river I've. been drunk this is wild so is that the. rescue guy where's the dude oh Jesus so. they got to swing them over that is. crazy imagine rescuing this [ __ ]. going hey bro what the [ __ ] are you. doing you're going to get me killed I. was waiting for my Uber look at this you.

got oh we hit the wall hang on [ __ ]. that guy's not even holding on to that. guy do they have him on a harness oh. they do okay they have him on a. harness look he's got him in full guard. he's got his back Mount the guy better. watch his. neck wow so the LA River is kind of. [ __ ] it's kind of it's kind of not. really a river yeah I mean it is a river. I guess I don't know what it was before. they cemented it up but that's what it. looks like look look at that that's a. car floating down the LA River and that. goes straight into the ocean so all that.

runoff from all those streets and all. those cities and all that pollution I. don't think there's a filter that stops. it when it gets to the ocean there's not. a filter big enough yeah there's not a. filter big enough uh it's kind of crazy. it's not kind of crazy there's a great. song LA River by honey honey okay is a a. friends of mine from uh La yeah it's a. great song but it's about I [ __ ] up. one of one of the lines is thought I saw. a body by the. weeds that's where River Phoenix died he.

died in front of the room Viper Room. right yeah so that's what it looks like. with water and without water show it. again without water so when you go down. there without water people are like. hanging out down there you can. skateboard ride your bike yeah but. there's a lot of like [ __ ] sketchy. people hanging out and if you're. deciding like what do you want to do. today man let's go down the [ __ ] LA. River and start some [ __ ]. I mean you're dealing with the drgs of. society this not iPhone to be found no.

dude it's a lot of flip phones a lot of. Androids those old car phones that AR a. lot of burner 7-Eleven phones a lot of. people just living out of their shopping. cart a lot of like crazy people homeless. people wild have you seen the shopping. carts that are turned into grills no but. that's a good move that's a really good. move solid move yeah yeah I mean. shopping carts you can steal them right. and if you it's the right metal yeah. makes sense he turn it around inside. catch a fish [ __ ] up place in San.

Francisco cuz they pay them they pay. them to be homeless they give them money. every month and guys move there to be. homeless yeah it's a good come up for. the outside people did you see about. that dude the cash app guy who got. stabbed there yeah of course there's a. video apparently of him like trying to. get help oh no collapsing getting back. up trying beging for help trying to get. help I don't I don't know exactly what. it was I didn't want to watch it I don't. want to watch a guy die no that's not my. thing remember fa of death I do you know. I was just talking to uh um the protar.

parks guys today we were talking about. this cuz I'd watched one too many. accident videos for the day I was like. how many accidents are you guys seeing. cuz on Instagram in particular I see so. many car accidents I hate it so many. people getting hit when they're on a. motorcycle so many people on motorcycles. hitting cars and going flying into the. air like I'm seeing so much of that so. much more than I ever saw before you got. to get out of that algorithm man oh it's. too late for that is it yeah my. algorithm's chaos mine's clean what is. yours mine's pretty good man it's you.

got there it's a large saggy breasts and. then cooking videos I have a lot of. cooking videos but I also have a lot of. car accidents yeah I don't have any car. accidents I have a lot of people getting. shot there's a lot of uh people getting. attacked by animals there's a lot of. animals attacking other animals what's. going on over there Joe yeah that's. what's catching your eye uh-huh okay. well mine's all like tours of the. Amsterdam River and [ __ ] today ask about. quite a fit of time quite a bit of time. watching an eagle paralyze a hyena wow.

he had landed on the Hyena's back and. he's pulling the Hyena's spine apart no. I like that and the hyena has his back. legs aren't working so he's trying to. drag himself away from this Eagle. lieuten Dan bouncing around he's. actually incredibly strong he can. actually like suspend his back legs and. move with his front arms cuz hyenas are. that strong but this Eagle's eating his. back it's wild to watch I couldn't escap. an eag Jes Christ Nature's so brutal. yeah you ever see the Mongolians when. they have Eagles on their arms and they. chase them after wolves they let them go.

to kill Wolves yeah and they have those. hoods for the Eagles and the Hawks. that's a beautiful life living on the. Mongolian step just eating horse milk. all the time hunting with a bird back in. the day I mean currently I don't think. those guys do it all the time I think. they have competitions out there there's. another video I saw I was trying to find. with this popped up too there's people. that do like drive by Falcon what the. [ __ ] oh my God so you throw him and he. just jacks a bird what the [ __ ] isn't. that cra crazy because they're not that. much bigger than the birds they're. jacking you know it's like if if.

defensive linemen were running around. there jacking and eating. people you know what I'm saying if. Warren Sap got loose yes they just shove. Warren Sap out of a window and Domin sue. for sure is eating someone Derrick Wolf. was in here the other day oh yeah former. Bronco former Viking former [ __ ] go. back in the little lineage there's not a. doubt in my mind that somewhere in his. ancestry there was a bunch of people on. a [ __ ] boat waiting cut people's. heads off 100% he's a Berserker 100% now.

imagine if guys like him were like that. Falcon just running around jacking. smaller things like how. could not that much different a guy like. him eating a guy like me is not that. much different than a falcon taking out. a crow no I not that much different not. that different I think he would eat me. first he'd eat whoever the [ __ ] he wants. whoever he wants at any time you going. do stop him from eating you lucky if he. ate you yeah that'd be better than what. he else would could do to you yeah I.

used to have a joke about Brock Lesnar. that I'm not worried Brock would rape me. I'm worried he would use me as a condom. to rape something way. bigger like Brock why are we go to the. zoo shut the [ __ ]. up he's just rolling up to the panda. cage with you in a bag he shoots the. locks off there's a video of uh Brock. Lesnar shooting prairie dogs with a 50. caliber rifle how much prairie dog. existed after that very little very. little and I was like why would someone.

do that but then someone informed me of. what prairie dogs do a lot of horses. they fall into their holes and snap. their legs oh my God yeah it's a problem. nature sucks man nature sucks fat dicks. it's no good it's so mean the more I. find out about it the more I want to. know less bro it's so mean yeah yeah. dolphins dolphins just [ __ ] puffer. fish and passing them around getting. high off of them well what what I. watched today is probably the most. ruthless [ __ ] I was I was talking to a. friend of mine today the lady who gives. me the IVs I get an IV uh twice a week.

like a vitamin IV NAD IV and so we're. watching uh we're talking about nature. and I did you ever see the Hornets. killing the bees killing the honey bees. yeah don't they vibrate around them no. no that's how the honey bees kill the. Hornets but most of the time they don't. do that yeah see the thing is if the. Hornets can get into the hive if there's. a crack where they can get into the hive. it's pretty much over they they get in. there and they kill everything and then.

they eat the babies so we were watching. this today I was like what kind of. [ __ ] bizarre life form are insects. yeah what kind of Ruthless [ __ ] that's. going on right outside of our eyes see. they got into this crack and they just. they killed the [ __ ] out of everyone. they killed 30 honeybees or 30 um wasps. killed 30,000. honeybees so they went in there and they. just cut all the heads off of 30,000.

honeybees and then they got to the main. Hive and they ate all their babies and. that's what they were there for they. were there to eat the babies that was. the job at hand yeah so you watch them. do it it's I didn't know how much they. could. swallow cuz I always felt like bees have. a weird like wasps even have a weird. mouth right they have like this like. these big Pinchers but I'm like they. don't have like a big opening but watch. what they do when they get inside when. they get inside and they start pulling. the larvae out of the the Honeycombs.

dude they just swallow those [ __ ]. things they just pull them out like this. here God they pull them out and they. just start slurping them like watch how. easy he eats this whole thing like I. never would have thought they could. swallow that much look how quick it. sucks down just crushing a booger just. just eat just smashing it into little. pieces and engulfing it look at this one. of those larvae is like the size of its. carrus yeah yeah it's and it's eating. the whole thing pretty pretty [ __ ]. quickly and that is how they get. nutrients for their babies right so they.

go back and it helps their their hive. the whole thing is beyond and that's. just happening all the time all the time. what other atrocities are going on out. there well I think those wasps might be. invasive I think there's a part of that. that's going on where there's invasive. um wasps that are killing honeybees let. me see if that's true because I know. that's one of the things that they were. really worried about when those murder. Hornets showed up remember the murder. Hornets uhhuh yeah yeah that was a fun. time what a great name murder horn great. band yeah would be a good band.

especially they [ __ ] rocking really. rock murder on a trash band wear that. T-shirt oh yeah I'd wear a bandana that. had their [ __ ] on it that's how you know. you're into the band when you show up. like Dog the Bounty Hunter right yeah um. I think some of them are invasive but. some but obviously they know what the. [ __ ] they're doing they they go in there. and they murder everybody I mean that's. the definition of invasive is eating. someone's young after you crush them and. eating 30 killing just chopping the. heads off 30,000. invasive murder Hornets are officially. back in the US entered the slaughter.

phase the slau what is this the purge oh. my God so those are the ones man did you. know that Hornets pollinate too uh they. have to do something they all pollinate. I figur they serve some purpose out. there they don't make honey I don't. think I know my grandmother I murder. honey all day I want to get some murder. Hornet honey what about that honey they. had honey yeah I have some you want some. right now yeah we can do it. What's it gonna do to us you're gonna. freak out a little. bit we have those shows this evening.

what are you worried about I know the. guy owns the club we're fine. um Mur honey mad honey it's up there. somewhere is it yeah where did you get. your hands on murder honey mad honey. it's mad honey it's from Nepal it's. those guys that psic honey yeah. yeah psychedelic is a strong word for. what I experienced what do you. experience I didn't take much so I just. experienced like a light Euphoria was. kind of interesting but apparently if.

you go too much it's really rough I love. Euphoria great show great feeling I. haven't watched it but I do enjoy the. feeling you should watch some Snippets. of it I'll send you some clips isn't it. like a bunch of kids banging each other. yeah but they're of age legally oh good. yeah yeah it's not it's not just [ __ ]. deleted scenes from Epstein's disc is. that it let me see from the yeah that's. what the [ __ ] [ __ ] seems like it's. broken up so do you think we shake it. something detura scary apparently I. never [ __ ] with that have you [ __ ]. with that no dude datura is it melts.

people's brains detura is Terence. McKenna swore off of it when he was. talking to a guy in an Open Air Market. yeah and the guy thought that they were. back at his house oh [ __ ] in the living. room and he realized somewhere along the. line of the conversation the guy didn't. know where he was like right now in the. moment in an Open Air Market uhhuh he. thought that he was in his apartment. that sounds like a fun thing to do here. on the podcast come on buddy hey man. you're here let's freak it out you're in. Texas I know they love uh mad honey here.

he got uh stopped at the uh um TSA just. a jar of that [ __ ] no because they they. were like making making sure he wasn't. traveling with this stuff after he did. the podcast that's good do we know the. dosage on this Jamie this is totally. legal by the way good that's what that. was my biggest fear was breaking the law. is is Mt honey legal just take a little. teaspoon just get in there I will take a. little te you go first okay yeah well. you scared. yes that's more than I took the last. time oh good all.

right tastes like honey it is honey yeah. it definitely tastes delicious it tastes. like smells don't take too much I want. to eat a die thank you that's big of you. just like really get the spoon wet and. then suck it suck the spoon all right. I'm like the dolly llama and then think. about all the diseases you could be. getting from. me I don't fear those you got a good eem. zilis and all that stuff no I'm not. worried thank you appreciate it you like.

it right don't go in again don't go for. seconds I'm not going for seconds. [ __ ] do it Sam no Jesus well all. right let's see is this legal what do. you mean let's find out it's just honey. yeah this is a gag ladies and gentlemen. we're faking it tastes bizarre it's just. honey [ __ ] now my tongue is on fire. well wait until it gets to your brain I. can't wait this will be good. water over here I'm going to go full. Credence Clear Water. yeah mad honey it tasted uh bizar the.

label it's legal to purchase in the. United States according to this there we. go it's legal fully legal it helps in. weight management by the way um when. that guy came in here and gave it to me. and said that he he brought it in that. was a lie he lied he got it from someone. who legally purchased it here in America. and he brought it over to me wink wink. yeah that's for sure what happened. that's what I'm saying yes yes no way. was this he's a good dude there's no way. he would do that the rules why the [ __ ]. would he do that the rules are there.

because they're good the rules are only. there always because they're good. they're always valid and uh Jesus loves. you and uh shave your beard if you're. single and that's right what other rules. do we have uh if you're not married you. should wear something to cover your head. M trans women to real women and what. else that honey got a you. quit a. little you see what do you think of this.

Dylan Moy thing it's fascinating I can't. drink Bud Light. anymore I'm drinking Bud Light more now. no I do because it gets me so hard when. I think about what they. did I can barely get it in my mouth. without coming dude transgender porn is. some wild stuff yeah Derek poston's into. that oh yeah yeah that's his [ __ ] he's a. connoisseur yeah straight man is a s of. trans porn he loves it I met Derek last. night he's hilarious I did his Open Mic.

that was fun he's a fun dude he a fun. dude happy to have him out here very. exciting we got a great great crop of uh. young upand cominging Talent out here. it's really exciting I keep asking your. security over there if I can handle. their guns and they don't think it's. very funny I think it's a good bit but. no yeah dude that club is quite the. Testament it's cool to see someone like. realize their dreams fully cuz that. place rules dude I didn't even have that. dream. I didn't have a dream of I didn't even I. I just knew when I moved here that I had.

to replace the sense of community that. we had in um La if we're going to have. like a real a real scene out here cuz. like I'm I'm living here I love it here. I'm not moving so this is where I'm at. so if this is where I'm at what do I. need there was some places that we were. working out like the Vulcan primarily. which is awesome and shout out to Nick. owns it he's the [ __ ] that's a great. place still a great place I still do. sets I'll still hop back and forth. especially once everything gets like. fully running at the mothership but but.

I realized like we need it set up the. right way for comedy like there's part. of like there's the hang and then. there's also like the ease of getting. onto the stage and there's like the. making it is Optimum for the audience. and then Optimum for the performers and. then making it so that young upand. cominging people have an easy way to get. on stage everything is thought out. perfectly man and also the fact that you. have that open mic and all the door. staff there are comedians which is great.

and they're all very nice and eager and. they're all funny was talking to them. last night they were [ __ ] funny they. all auditioned yeah so they got to see. their act and so it's like you're in a. part of like an apprenticeship program. you're going to be be able to go on. stage during the open mics which are two. nights a week There's kill Tony there's. uh times where the uh door guys can go. up on showcase shows those will run for. hours and hours and you know [ __ ] 10. 15 times talented people that you get a. chance to see someone in the early days. it's like seeing Lou CK in Boston in.

1988 and they go dude I saw that guy. when he was like a year into comedy and. then bam yeah you got that guy Keith you. got Lucas there's a lot of good guys. there a lot of good women there a lot of. good there's a couple non barers yeah we. got at least. one checking all the bo it's a diverse. group we gave him his own Bud Light. after the first week we put his face on. a. can do you have any beer yeah you want a. beer I'd take a light beer okay let's. get get some Bud Lights Let's uh do this. yeah in support of Bud Light in their.

time of be allies by getting a little. day we're going to be allies you know. cuz Kid Rock and Travis trit have put. the [ __ ] hammer down I know they're. really [ __ ] fighting the good fight. man here's my take. okay like what you're what you're doing. what they're doing is just spreading the. brand to a an extra group of people yeah. why if something is good do you give a. [ __ ] who's got it like would we do this.

with cheesecake like you know what I'm. saying like if there was like a bombass. cheesecake and all of a sudden you know. some radical group like antifa really. got into the cheesecake we' be like [ __ ]. this yeah and if the like if the. Cheesecake Factory sent antifa a. cheesecake you know for 10 more years of. chaos you know a. celebratory A celebratory yeah if only. Isis had bearclaw Donuts I'm still. eating those [ __ ] but on the other. hand I loved Kid Rock's video cuz I love.

that I love Cheers Cheers man I love. that kind of. thinking not even that I agree with it I. like wild people yeah I like in hell man. I'd like a dude who takes a machine gun. to a stack of Bud Lights it's like [ __ ]. anheiser. Bush this will show up but I mean. where's he going to go now you going to. go to Kors cuz don't they all support. like uh LBG TQ plus AI whatever the hell. else they're attaching to IT issues they. all do I mean I'm from Colorado and Kors.

has had those rainbow cans forever. [ __ ] Shane Gillis is heartbroken faor. beer I was opening for him last weekend. this is what sucks he drinks Bud Light. every time he does protect our Parks. those things have [ __ ] millions of. views I know where's his can of beer he. did not he was not a he said the exact. same thing he's problematic oh yeah he's. an issue man he's an issue being one of. the funniest [ __ ] human beings alive. Earth and also generous and commity. great guy but for whatever reason they.

won't give him a Bud Light they should. give him some lips if they were smart. they would send Shane a BD light with. his face on it too say we love everybody. well the can's not big enough to fit his. face that's true it's a big round head. you could put like half of his face like. a you know like a like a artsy thing. right yeah then you to put them all. together yeah there you go who did you. get a left side of the face or the right. side Bud Light sponsors the moon so if. you're two. yeah you know mhm no man I think that uh. it's crazy when people get upset about.

that stuff because the people who get. upset about that stuff value Liberty and. freedom so much and they want to live. their lives undeterred by anyone's rules. but they think that the company that. they like is giving into the woke agenda. that's what it is there is no woke. agenda well they think there is in like. uh movies and television and media and. commercials and uh they're worried about. it in universities they're worried about. it in schools and high schools and. grammar Schools they're worried about it. because there is some evidence that some.

people do try to indoctrinate children. into views that maybe don't align with. the parents views right who's right and. who's wrong that's up to interpretation. but the question is like is it. appropriate for someone to be giving. their politics or their cultural values. that may be opposite of the cultural. values of the parents is it appropriate. for this person who spends probably more. time during the day with your kid than. you do right to do that to your kids all. day long what about religion though. because you're indoctrinating your kids. before they have any say in that you.

know maybe your kids are atheists and. they go to school it's still you're. talking about public school right like. everybody like you're going to have kids. that are all sorts of religions in those. public schools and all sorts of non. religions or going to be a bunch of. different flavors of atheism agnostics. or people who just aren't religious at. all they don't those kids are going to. school too and if they're getting. indoctrinated and they don't want to be. that's the question it's not saying that. it happens all the time time there's. just enough evidence of it where there's. plenty of videos of people actually. doing it like project Veritas got a.

bunch of them and there's you know the. libs of Tik Tok got a bunch of them it's. like it's really a thing with some. people that teach school but not most of. them most of them are great people who. are Educators and what they're trying to. do and they they what they get. satisfaction out of if they're good is. they they try to educate kids and they. they want them to have a good experience. so they look back and they remember. remember Mrs Wilson's class she was. [ __ ] awesome like this is one teacher. that I had in high school I wish I could. remember her name but everybody went to. her cuz she would talk to you friendly.

and she was a sweetheart she was a sweet. lady she was a really nice lady and she. was really good at her job but like if. you [ __ ] up and she was like you're. supposed to have it in like what. happened like you felt bad like I'll get. I'll fix it I'll finish it I'm sorry. like you felt bad like you wanted to do. well in that lady yeah cuz she was so. sweet that's the best example the worst. example is some shitty dumb person who. gets a job teaching because a lot of. people don't want to teach and then they. find because it's very low paying and it. doesn't get a lot of reward and praise.

from people also parents are a nightmare. parents are a nightmare and and then. this shitty person is in front of your. kids with their really dumb ideas and. there's a lot of those people there's a. lot of those people and they think what. we're going to do is we're going to. indoctrinate their children we're going. to turn their children against them and. there's there are people like that out. there in the world doesn't mean that's. all of them it's like there are bad cops. out there in the world but the most cops. are great it's not it's not like all. cops are evil it's like the job is. really [ __ ] hard and most people do. their best but some people [ __ ] suck. at it like everything like plumbers like.

everything it's just that with cops the. consequences are so grave and with kids. it's kind of a [ __ ] up situation. because if you're a parent and you're. working all day and your kids at school. all day and they're getting. indoctrinated into a set of ideas that. don't align with your values or don't. align with your sense of the world or. you what you believe reality to be what. you want to teach in your home as well. what do you want to teach in your home. so it's like it's very tricky it's like. what is what is school supposed to do. generally it's supposed to educate. children but it's not necessar supped to.

indoctrinate as well though I mean it's. supposed to put them in a situation. where they understand like regimented. schedules well that's what it was. originally invented for but if you ask. someone what's the. primary reason for Education it's to you. send these kids to school to teach them. about life teach them history teach them. how to do mathematics teach them. language teach them art fractions. fractions all kinds of stuff you're. supposed to be prepar ing them for. college or high school and when you're. doing this but you're instead you're.

spending the entire class talking about. uh different things that you think are. wrong with the world or wrong with. Donald Trump or wrong with uh you know. trans people not being able to compete. in the sport of their gender of choice. like those kind of things are not what. you're supposed to be teaching kids. these are opinion-based things and these. are things that maybe someone if they. were Deb dating you in that moment that. was also an adult might may you make you. look really foolish they would bust your. ass yeah for sure cuz the things you say.

are stupid but these [ __ ] 5-year-olds. don't know they're stupid no cuz kids. are dumb as hell cuz they don't know. anything yet yeah their what people. worried about yeah but I do remember. good teachers you know like the good. teachers are the ones I don't remember. any bad teachers I had a teacher named. Mrs Storch who got me a bunch of cool. books this is not that. good it's just not it'll do for now it's. a thing right it's like a cold thing you. drink yeah it's like you know what I. used to get [ __ ] for Zas oh Zas those.

sodas not Zas that's right I knew it was. wrong Z I like I drink that stuff all. the time I was allegedly conceived on. Zas yeah that's the way to go yeah have. your kid on a delicious fruity sort of. uh bubbly sodal likee alcoholic my mom. and dad split a [ __ ] 24 pack OFA and. made me in Glennwood Springs wasn't too. strong no you know heartb bur though. dude you can't have like eight of them. I've never had eight Zas I have you've. had eight yeah cuz they brought them.

back you know zema's a thing with I'm. not really trying to get drunk you know. like if I'm trying to get drunk I'm. drinking whiskey if I'm drinking I'm. typically trying to get drunk always. yeah don't you just like to have a. little buzz I'll have a little glass of. wine here and there there you go yeah. zema drinks returning to Summer of 2018. for a limited time y they try to bring. it back they brought it back bring it. back come on zema I'm on your side yeah. I liked it I liked them a lot I don't. get it yeah I don't get it [ __ ] white. claw made it but Zas didn't well these. are all sugar though but tell me tell me. how the [ __ ] white claw made it and Zema.

did it is it a timing thing is it like. betamax and the VHS tape the superior. product doesn't make it well zma had. like 20 years head start on white claw. bro I used to get so much [ __ ] for. ordering zema they're like what are you. doing bro well were you at the pool hall. no I a [ __ ] improv on Melrose on your. fun of me Comics were making fun of me. for drinking zema I'm like I'm sorry. it's delicious it looks like a 10 things. about Z what I know bad for you what are. the fun facts about zema there's no fun. facts no The Branding sucks there zema's.

like Blockbuster Video like no one. thought it was going to go away but here. we are in a post zema world it's over. it's weird cuz it was delicious it. didn't taste bad at all it's not a bad. product it was kind of viscous. though it had that kind of Milky look to. it when it was in the bottle for too. long really yeah I thought it was like. Sprite it started clear but then if you. had it on the shelf for a while how long. did you you leave your zema on a show I. remember my I think my dad had like a. couple Zas in his office a little milky. milky yeah look at that yeah but that's.

just a CGI image oh you think that's. computer generated that's the same. bottle over and over again that's what. it looks like it looks like [ __ ]. soda bottle malt delicious clear malt. soda I'd be more surprised if you had. zema in here than that you have mad. honey that would blow my mind even more. get it you probably have to get it on. eBay from your Dad yeah for sure your. dad's got some cases my dad takes the. helicopter in your dad's got some cases.

I but the thing is like about this Dylan. mulany thing it's like it's just someone. who wants a lot of attention and you're. giving that someone a lot of attention. and you're trying to reach another. audience like I saw I was like what the. [ __ ] is this my initial reaction is like. this is silly they but it's also your um. budlight fan your typical budlight fan. is like NASCAR [ __ ] sports like. that's most of the people that are. drinking Bud Light guys like Shane most.

PE if you saw the Bud Light demographics. yeah of who's drinking Bud Light bigots. I saw this [ __ ] guys like. Shane Shane he's joking Shane yeah. Shane's my boy what the [ __ ] was I gonna. say Jesus Christ you threw me off yeah. it wasn't the honey the Honey's in there. though there's like there's a little. current popping around in there it might. be the cigar probably cigar yeah can I. have that lighter again yeah yeah sure. thank you um [ __ ] I lost it you were.

talking about oh yeah just how uh the. Target demographic of Bud Light but it's. like a lot of companies are using this. person there's more than one company. there's like a a bunch of them like Nike. and a bunch of other stuff also she's. pretty I get it no I mean I see nothing. wrong good luck hey man yeah it's it's. one of those things it's like it's funny. what people get like super outraged. about. you know like we're in the middle of uh. you know Tulsa gabard posted up some.

stuff the other day um about the. restrict act and uh you flip the top. here I showed you before pull the top. back there you go thank. you well I did it before you before. that's like one of those teach a man to. fish things yeah it's not going to be. lit no I know I got to get rid of that. as you know like no one's freaking out. about that but they're freaking out. about Bud Light like how you how is that. the big deal I think it's goofy because. I think that person's goofy but if you. want to hire a goofy person like who.

gives a [ __ ] it's kind of hilarious when. someone says 365 days of Womanhood it. was also on April Fool's Day that's true. too but it also was just a can with that. person's face on it that's all it was it. was a it wasn't like something they were. selling yeah they didn't have it in. stores no but it's kind of funny yeah I. like that people get mad I thought what. Kid Rock did was funny I laughed at it I. told him I thought it was funny and. but I. also it doesn't make me mad not at all. it just makes me like what well I think.

I get what they're doing though they're. trying to get people that are popular. they're just they're just looking for. influencers to help them and they're. trying to look more inclusive because of. the uh you know assumptions people make. about Bud Light drinkers but those. assumptions and also look at us we're on. the biggest platform in the world. discussing Bud Light for like 10 minutes. right it's probably good for the brand. yeah for sure yeah Shane loves it I just. I don't care I like Miller Light more I. like Sam Adams I like a dark beer oh I. want a beer I can have like 17 of oh. really yeah I want to be sipping beer.

all night yeah go Stan hope used to like. to do that he's like a light beer yeah. he's sober as [ __ ] except for the. Edibles well yeah but no cigarettes for. Stan hope either he looked good the. other day I saw him I was like dude you. look younger I was hoping he'd still be. here like alive he's the man Oh you mean. he [ __ ] made my book happen dude it. was all him he did tell me about it too. he was the first person to tell me and. he gave me a copy of it he said dude you. got to read this he gave it to Bert he. gave it to everybody I started watching. so I saw that and I said well let me see.

if this guy's funny so I went and watch. some of your Clips I'm like oh all right. man started following you and then. finally met you and you got a chance to. see the club before it ever got I mean. what stage was it in when you visited. that was probably June of last year so. there was no seats was the cement even. poured then no and there was still that. [ __ ] do you remember the swasa swasa. listen to this folks you want hear. [ __ ] story so the club um that I. bought at one point in time it's called. The Ritz Theater the Ritz Theater was a.

theater from 1927 it's been a lot of. things and at one point in time it was a. punk rock Club it was a pool hall at one. point in time it was a a nudie movie. theater back in the day um Stevie Ron. played there like you know that walkway. when you get to the stage there's a big. frame photo of Stevie Ron that photo of. Steve Ron on stage at the Ritz in 1983. wow and so a lot of punk rock bands. played there the Butthole Surfers played. there Misfits played there a lot of. people played there flag and somebody.

painted a swastika on the wall now. here's where it gets stupid I saw it. when we cuz we had to like take down a. lot of stuff and we knocked down like uh. like these uh you know the wall board. and [ __ ] that was covering things and. then underneath all that on the brick. you see a swasa yeah and I was like hey. we should probably take that [ __ ]. swasa down everybody was laughing and so. then no one took it down and I came back. like 2 months later I'm like hey why is. the [ __ ] swastika still here so then. it gets to it gets to like we're almost.

open yeah it's gets to like a month. before we're open I'm like take the. [ __ ] swas every time I come here I'm. like how hard is it to just brush that. down and knocked it off the wall so you. know what someone does they clean it so. they clean it and they made it white. this is what they did because they clean. it with this solvent to take out the. black ink and instead left a white. swasa I was like Jesus [ __ ] Christ do. I have to spell this out that's still a.

SW swastika get rid of it I didn't say. enhance the swasa whole it's way easier. to see now well you were saying like I. think I'm going to call the club the. rooms fat man and little boy but I'm a. little worried people are going to be. upset if they lost someone in World War. II and I was like well you know what. else might piss some people off Joe that. [ __ ] huge swasa up there yeah that. should have already been gone the fat. man and little boy thing is in reference. the whole reason for the thing is UFO. themed yeah and in the UFO lore the UFOs. come right after the detonation of fat.

man and little boy that's why it's named. fat man and little boy because I thought. it' be plus one's big one's small makes. sense it was it worked with the theme in. UFO folklore that's like what happened. like that and it makes sense if you look. at the recorded sightings it's obviously. it's like the news before 1947 it's kind. of sketchy anyway like who knows what. was reported but after 1947 there's a. [ __ ] load of sightings a lot of like. there's there's UFOs that flew over the. White House and they were filmed there's.

photographs of them there's uh um the. Roswell crash was in 1947 been down. there a couple times have you been there. my old man loves UFOs oh really yeah and. my grandma's from Northern New Mexico so. we've driven down to Roswell two or. three times and it's just a tourist trap. now I have two brilliant friends that. have two completely opposite views what. do they think one brilliant friend is. convinced they're from another planet or. another di this person is from another. planet or the aliens no no no the UFOs. that these things people are seeing he.

he said if you just look at the size of. the universe and if you look at all of. the possibilities for life and how life. could be Advanced a thousand 100. thousand a million years more than us. especially if they're in some sort of a. stable environment where they're not in. an asteroid belt or anything like that. they don't have super volcanoes on their. Planet whatever it is if they got to a. certain level for sure they'd be able to. visit and if they did get to that level. they would be able to do things that we. would we would think is Magic and that.

they would be able to go into the ocean. they'd be able to fly off in insane. rates of speed and use methods of. propulsion that we can't even understand. and he thinks that's what it is he. thinks that they are just observing and. probably making sure that we don't knock. ourselves back in the Stone Age so. they're protectors no I think it's. probably like an ecobiology that goes. into the jungle and examines species.

darwinian thing yeah like imagine if. like there was a like a type of sloth or. something in the Amazon that was in. danger of dying you know and there was a. lot of funding behind it and they went. there and they wanted to try to rescue. the sloth and figure it out they do. stuff like that right so if we do stuff. like that with limited resources and. people have to donate money to these. things it's hard for them to get funded. imagine if you're some super Advanced. civilization from another galaxy and you. recognize that one planet has come into. nuclear power they have now have nuclear. capabilities this signal goes out. through the universe okay these [ __ ].

are blowing themselves up these Apes. figured out let's go visit yeah let's go. visit and that's the UFO for folklore is. that that that's when they all start. showing up and that's when you get like. the all all the different crazy U like. Betty and Barney Hill the induction. stories all that stuff all that stuff. comes after 1947 crazy story about them. is they were interracial in like the 50s. yeah in I think it was in Maine or. something like that yeah yeah you know I. know um uh one of their granddaughters. Angela Hill she's a fighter she fights.

in the UFC no way yeah she's a top. ranked fighter in the UFC yo what's the. name of that fighter from uh Denver like. the small lady fighter from Colorado. which one I don't know dude she has like. short hair and she whips ass there's. quite a bit Denver's got a good crop of. of Fighters yeah. anyway she's very pretty as well there's. a lot of uh oh oh oh like rose or. something Rose namun yes okay yeah okay. yeah that's right she's Rose is awesome.

yeah I wonder if she's fighting soon I. think she is I don't know I think she's. fighting soon I wrestled in high school. but I never fought did you yeah I had to. my coaches made me wrestle football. coaches did yeah my wrestling coach. tried to get me to play football but. luckily we did when we wrestled there. was a kid named Bobby Baker it was 300. lb and I was like look at him and look. at me I go I'm not letting that guy. chase me and run me over chasing anybody. but if if if I [ __ ] up and I got too. close right you know big paws on you.

he's a bear he was so big he was so much. bigger than everybody else I'm like. that's just not happening man that's. crazy wrestling is brutal I would play. football at 320 and then I had to cut to. 275 oh my God like real quick you know. cuz that's like the cut off for. heavyweights in Colorado how much time. did you have to cut [ __ ] like 6 weeks. two months oh wow it all egg whites and. Clementine oranges and like tobacco it. was. terrible pissed I pissed 8 pounds one. time I retained so much water that I. urinated out 8 pounds wow yeah cuz after.

you make weight then you just eat like a. whole bagette and a bunch of Pop-Tarts. you know oh smart yeah well that's what. you do after you finally make weight you. the [ __ ] up thing about wrestling too. is you have to make weight the day of. the tournament I know dude yeah. wrestling sucks also heavyweight. wrestling is bad because it's just. whoever falls down first wins that's not. always true that's the whole thing that. in my experience if you went down the. guy laid on you and you're just waiting. for the. Bell it was brutal I was so bad on my. feet but then if you're on the bottom.

luckily you can just grab their arm and. like try and roll with them that's all. of heavyweight wrestling how long did. you wrestle for three years oh wow yeah. did you ever think about doing Jiu-Jitsu. or something like that afterwards no I. don't have it in me no I mean I uh I. don't have like the blood lust you know. oh it's not a blood lust thing most of. the people I know do Jiu-Jitsu are nerds. that's true Joe list really smart guys. yeah and Bourdain was really into it you. know it's like a lot of people that are. very intelligent get into it I don't. know I I don't know if I have I love. competition and I have that jock in me.

still but the whole one-on-one man- on-. man thing I don't know if like I would. really not even Excel but really enjoy. it it's not as aggressive as you think. it is especially with a good school a. good school it's really like you kind of. flow and you do it in a sense where. you're not like exploding on each other. you're trying to learn the moves and. execute the moves the other person. trying to defend execute their own moves. it's like and the in the the guy who's. better doesn't want to break you in half. CU there's nothing in it for him when. you're a beginning you're always not I. shouldn't say always most of the time.

you're better off going with someone who. is much better because the people that. are much better can take care of you. they're not going to hurt you but. there's a lawsuit that really recently. um got uh uh this guy was a Jiu-Jitsu. coach I think it's in California and he. um did like a forward roll with a guy to. take his back and the guy's neet got. caught in a bad situation and snapped. his neck and he got nerve damage and. paralysis and he got he just got awarded.

46 million dollar holy [ __ ] yeah it's. not good it's one a bad precedent it. does but it's also it's is a very. unfortunate aspect of jiujitsu that you. occasionally are going to get a bad. injury and I know of people uh in MMA. class that got paralyzed particularly um. when someone goes for a guillotine uh. someone shoots in for a double sometimes. guys will go for a guillotine and if. they catch the neck and the guy who's. shooting the double lands on his head.

yeah as they're falling yeah and it has. happened before and guys have been. paralyzed doing that and in um I was. reading this thing about um uh Judo dojo. in Japan and that uh deaths do happen. where guys get spiked on their head they. get thrown and slammed on their head. like every year someone dies doing Judo. in Japan but that's probably like a. revered way to go out in Japan in you. know probably I don't want to say. honorable cuz that's hacky but there is. like a commitment to craft over there. that is unlike anything we have here.

yeah especially in regards to martial. arts like that that culture really. rewards that commitment C Sumo oh my God. I would I was in Japan at the beginning. of the year and I didn't get to see Sumo. the point is though it's like it's. dangerous just like playing football's. dangerous people die playing football. there's RIS and that the thing is about. that guy they were trying to paint him. that he was a total beginner but the. reality was he had years of wrestling. and he had at least I believe it was at. least two years of Jiu-Jitsu two years.

of Jiu-Jitsu is not I mean it's it's a. beginner in a sense but it's not someone. who doesn't know what they're doing. especially someone who's already done a. couple of years of grappling I think it. was just a freak accident when I saw it. it looked like a freak accident and the. majority of the people that I talked to. that were Jiu-Jitsu guys they also. thought it was a freak accident but 46. million I mean who knows if that's going. to stick and appeals I mean obviously. the guy needs to be compensated somehow. or another insurance or something badly. sign up for it though I know but I think. most. those yeah but there's probably like.

catastrophic injury insurance or. something like that I don't know I don't. know I don't know what I'm talking about. when it comes to that but yeah you do. sign up for it and you know I've. definitely been hurt it happens I've had. multiple surgeries from Jiu-Jitsu yeah. both my knees I had surgeries on because. of Jiu-Jitsu my nose well my nose been. [ __ ] was [ __ ] up for a long time but. like had some real problems with my back. and my neck bulging discs and [ __ ] that. I had to get treated with stem cells and. PRP and stuff like that it's just it's.

one of those things it's like you're. signing up for a dangerous gain I think. sports are very important for Youth and. I loved being on a team I think being an. offensive lineman made me a better host. as a comedian because I was used to like. never touching the ball and never. getting the accolades I literally think. those translated like those two skills. oh that's interesting yeah like so you. could be the guy who brings up the. really good people that everybody's. there to see yeah and also do a good job. setting the table for the show it made. you like selfless in a way you know it's.

also like hosting is a very interesting. job too because one of the things that. it does is it allows you to get. comfortable on stage and comfortable. like with Transitions and it gives you. like reps yeah like another just it's. just different kind of reps almost like. cross training a little bit it's the. easiest way to get a lot of stage time. early cuz you're physically on stage. even if you are doing seven minutes up. front yeah you have to do the gaps in. between mhm you become a good host. that's your way to getting in at any. club where was is you are you uh were. you at The Comedy Works in Denver yeah.

that's my home Club that's the [ __ ] my. company man dude oh yeah that's right I. didn't see it is it 40 years ago yeah 40. years wow 81 wow that's amazing yeah I. don't even know when I first went there. dude I got a story for you there. remember when you tried to move to. Boulder for a while yeah so you came. down and like did I think new Talent. night on Tuesday you just closed their. new Talent night yeah and a lot of us. were were on that show just like. randomly so then open for Joe Rogan went. in like 13 people's bios the day after.

that show cuz we happened to be on a. show that you closed that's funny happy. to help yeah no it was good man that was. fun I wish I could have stayed yeah that. would have been wild if you set up what. you did here in Boulder well I wouldn't. have been able to do it back then. because I didn't even have a podcast. that was pre- podcast PR podcast yeah. one of the reasons why I started the. podcast is I was bummed out that I had. to leave Colorado had to come back to LA. my wife got pregnant and uh back then um. you with if you uh are pregnant at high.

altitude it's uh very rough it's like. having the flu yeah altitude sickness. yeah and when we came back also she. couldn't drive in snow but that's. another story but when we came back it. was like immediate difference in being. at altitude versus like where we were at. was like 8,000 ft above sea level was. very high yeah it was awesome though but. it was you know like I got a dog eaten. by Mountain line up there it's like it. was rough yeah little dog left him in. the yard Jesus Christ it's sketchy. you're you're dealing with like real.

wild [ __ ] up there like you know you see. porcupines and foxes and occasionally. you'll see something crazy like a. mountain line I saw one mountain line in. between the trees once and I was like. whoa could only see it like briefly like. Bigfoot like just moving through the. trees but I saw this four-legged thing. just moving through the trees and I was. like oh [ __ ] I think that's a Mountain. line damn dude and the neighbors all saw. them they saw them all over the place. they used to be around my middle school. all the time we'd have to have indoor.

recess because there was mountain lions. outside in one of the places uh near. where I was staying this guy left uh his. door like either partially a jar or the. bear figured out how to get into his car. and maybe the bear opened the door the. door was unlocked so the bear opened the. door and ate his seats ate his dashboard. ate everything just SU. they just smelled Lea yeah they just. assumed that it was an animal I don't. like that a bear can open a car door.

that doesn't feel good well I think. they're smart man and if they've done it. before that's the thing about bears when. they um when they attack they were. discussing that to us when we move up. there they said if they get your garbage. like is a real problem cuz they never. going to stop coming back yeah once the. Bears find yeah once they find they're. like not you don't scare them off you. scare them off for now that was like me. at that 7-Eleven dumpster man soon as. found out they had the hot and readies. in there I was. like fcking I.

would I was on all. fours it's a funny story now to look. back though right oh yeah I loved it man. that's one of the awesome things about. like pulling it off yeah I know yeah. dude yeah like being here after doing it. so hard for so long like I did it is. this it feels cool when something pays. off in comedy yeah it does like cuz I. did it like gnarly like Joey coko Diaz. when he tells those stories I'm like oh. I did that as well yeah like it's [ __ ]. but it was great that's how everybody. does it you do those Tribble runs those.

weird gigs in the middle of nowhere. entertainment Max everybody has those. stories yeah and I One the fun things. about doing comedy it's the best dude. that's why those YouTube guys are [ __ ]. like if you get famous on YouTube and. then you start doing comedy as an open. micer you're already famous like ah you. already got your own crowds coming to. see you but their crowds are dumb cuz. they're into that kind of humor like. comedy's so big now that it's boots and. you can find exactly what you think is. funny that's true yeah that's true so if. you want to be a YouTube Guys fan and go. to see his shows you don't care that.

he's not competent at comedy because you. just want to get the [ __ ] selfie with. them after the show have you seen the. meet and greets for those YouTube guys. shows no they're so they'll do like 35. minutes and then they'll do a Q&A. typically and then there's like a two. and a half hour meet and greet afterward. where people come on Buy the T-shirt. take the picture that's the whole show. they want the gram they want the gram. that's why people attend oh and those. YouTube guys are printing money wow yeah. and then they get a guy like me hosting. for him and you [ __ ] bury him but. then you look out at the crowd and. you're like oh you guys don't know what.

good comedy is you guys just want to see. you know [ __ ] Lefty razar coming up. next they just happy to see that twitch. guy yeah guy who's really good at. playing video games yeah strange what a. skill dude it's a weird thing but is it. any weirder than like [ __ ] news. anchors you know any weirder than. anybody who becomes famous for no. [ __ ] reason in matters of taste there. is no debate you know so if you're into. that [ __ ] go crazy I think it's good. overall because now people who might not. have gone to comedy clubs are getting. into the comedy club system so they get. that email and then they receive the hey.

you know it's your birthday bring 20. friends type [ __ ] and then it gets more. people to get eyes on Comedy even if it. is through like an ulterior way yeah. that's true what what freaks people out. though is when YouTube guys start doing. weekends at a club they used to work out. and they go hey what the [ __ ] man we're. all pissed yeah it's not even really. comedy I know and then I have to do a. rap date there and it's like what the. [ __ ] what's a rap date it's like a. Wednesday Thursday Sunday you know. oh wrap so you wrap around the weekend. where the YouTubers are there yeah. exactly but that's fun too though I mean. it's fun to be in a comedy club it's fun.

for the crowd it's fun to go from like. the warehouses that I was performing in. to cuz I came at it from like a punk. rock like hardcore DIY Thing where it's. like I'll perform anywhere uh and then. you just live on the road and you would. come home I'd be gone for like three. weeks and come home with like $600 my. wife would be like what is what's why. it's like well I'm getting good you know. one day baby yeah day I'll be on JRE she. got to be happy now she's stucked I mean. when she met me she knew what it was I. was already on the road so you already.

working yeah I was I mean I've been on. the road since like 2008 doing all those. Mountain show gigs opening for people in. like Gillette Wyoming oh really yeah. what are those like terrible dog [ __ ]. what's in Gillette Wyoming mingles. mingles is in Gillette Wy paint a. picture for me you walk in all right. you've got a big disco ball you have a. lenium floor in a bar for some reason. there's all those like terrible chairs. that they brought in from a church like. the hard like metal chairs that. wrestlers would hit each other with you. walk in there's seven TVs you know they.

turn off whatever the local high school. football game is and you have to perform. you go up you do 20 minutes eat your ass. for people who uh you know they don't. they don't know what comedy is they're. not the most like uh they're not into. creative comedy you know they're like. Vegas crowds but they can't afford to go. to Vegas all right and then you see like. the worst hack in the world go on and. kill after you and you're like oh what. am I doing here and then the hack tries. to [ __ ] some old lady and you have to. sleep in the bathtub because you're.

sharing a hotel. room and you get a 100 bucks and you. have to split gats that's those shows. dude oh my God yeah dude one time I did. a show up there with this guy who not. going to say his name but uh after the. show the lady's like are you guys hungry. and I was like yes I'm hungry and he's. like we're okay we're okay and she's. like well we got the best [ __ ]. chicken wings in the world up here and. he's like oh we're good hour goes by. we're drinking uh he's like hey what's. up with those chicken wings and they're. like oh we turned the fryer off like a. half hour ago and the guy's like ah man.

chicken wings sound good right now don't. they Sam and I'm like I guess yeah sure. so he's like what about those chicken. wings and they're like uh we can't we. have to like get the chef back in here. and like get the fryer going again and. he's like yeah we got time you guys want. to do that so they're like okay right on. Sir so they [ __ ] get the fryer going. again the guy who does the chicken wings. comes back he's they're like so how do. you want your chicken wings done and. he's like I want them spicy and they're. like well we got real spicy wings and. he's like that's good so we're there for.

another 45 minutes as the fryer oel is. heating up they finally put the wings in. they come out they give him the wings he. takes a bite he goes oh these are spicy. and they're like yeah you said you want. them spicy and he's like I can't have. these and he [ __ ] left wow and that. guy was like the coolest guy in the. world to me at this time that's the guy. I aspired to be you know what I mean. that's the dude that's the dude who. brought me gave me the shot the that. [ __ ] ascended hand of God came down. and touched me but isn't it also like an. education to like that kind of comic.

yeah cuz you don't know about that kind. of comic until you work with them on the. road and you realize like that's why. we're in the middle of Wyoming doing. this gig and this guy's been doing. comedy for 15 years and he's making 350. bucks tonight yeah and I dropped out of. college to do this gig with him you. know yeah yeah I mean those are the. people don't think about like that kind. of Comedy people for like that's my. [ __ ] book is all about that guy yeah. you know people forget about the dudes. who are out there [ __ ] doing 12. nights in a row a lot of them there's a. shitload and they just are there to sell.

merch that's their whole thing they just. run their sad flea market after the. shows and people come up and they know. their shirt says like I'm was stupid. with an arrow pointing down to their. dick and then it's like a link to like a. [ __ ] you know Angel Fire website on. the back of. it and then their whole thing is like. trying to bang someone's daughter or. like find the worst cocaine in South. Dakota oh and that's they think they're. [ __ ] cool and then you have to share. a room with these guys and they'll be. like all right in the bathtub with you I. got a lady coming over they like throw. you a pillow they're like all right I'll.

knock on the door when I'm done oh my. God yeah I did that for like three years. and I would call home and be like Mom. and Dad I made it you know wow I'm. living my dream right now I did a. college where I had a stand on stage and. the stage was two like lunch tables that. they push together middle of the day you. literally yeah middle of the day so. literally there's a speaker up there. with you and you're standing on these. rickety lunch tables mhm was and then. and these guys were calling me a [ __ ].

yelling out and uh I started tearing. them apart and when I start tearing them. apart then all a sudden everybody starts. laughing yeah and uh they come up to the. side of the stage and said you're not. allowed to swear I go I'm not allowed to. swear like what the [ __ ] are you talking. about I and then then I turned them. against them I'm like listen to this. folks you guys are how many of you are. 18 of course they all start cheering I. go so you guys are old enough to go to. war you're old enough to die for your. country but this [ __ ] guy over here. doesn't think I can swear in front of. you cuz you don't know like I don't want.

to tarnish your pristine little Minds. yeah I'm like [ __ ] this place let's. light this place on fire and everybody. starts screaming and cheering and then. the guy the guy goes fine we'll deal. with the consequences later do whatever. you want I go I was going to do whatever. I wanted anyway he just told me I could. do whatever I want like did you not. understand that I was already doing. whatever I want the [ __ ] out of here. don't give me clearance to do whatever. the [ __ ] I want but sudden became fun. because it became like here's this uh 24. year-old visiting these 18-year-olds. talking [ __ ] with them and you're like.

an old man to I was old as [ __ ] 24 I was. an old man like listen none of these. people know what the [ __ ] is going on. they're all trapped here they're in. allette Michigan okay there's no reason. they don't want to be here this is a. disaster the the directions I got here. so I started talking about the. directions that I got they were so wrong. they couldn't have been more wrong it's. like someone not knowing what the roads. are and just just riding I had to get. directions from someone else that was. unrelated I had to make three or four. different phone calls in the days of no. cell phones so I had to pull over to gas.

stations find a pay phone where the [ __ ]. is your college and these are the people. that were like teaching young people yes. morons molding young minds and when he. had a conversation with me afterwards. when he's writing me a check he's like. I'm going to talk to your agent about. this I go talk to my agent and here's. another thing how about tell the [ __ ]. people they can't yell out obscenities. they. and I'm in the middle of doing comedy. and comedy happens like that's what you. do do you know that's my job when. someone starts yelling [ __ ] at me I go.

what did you say sir and then we're. having fun okay do you understand that. is what you paid me to do if you don't. police the crowd if you didn't ask these. children to be be nice and you know be. be good audience members then then it's. like a regular show yeah and it's going. to be a Regular Show anyway stupid I'm a. comedian also it's the middle of the day. these kids are trying to study and you. just [ __ ] FR me on them Ambush comedy. is a nightmare dude and they were. animals these were all football players. it was one of those yes a lot of them.

were the whole football team was there. and they were animals but it was fun as. soon as I turned on that guy and then. then we're having a party right then. they get it and then they were like. you're cool yeah then it was fun I did I. was like your age I did this stage of. life you know these these [ __ ] people. are these are not the people you should. be listening to yeah you turn to the. guy's yelling at you make him Flinch and. they're like yes he's one of ours him. [ __ ] hit him you pant him and shove. him over yeah shoot a Bud Light a. shotgun. it oh dude those College gigs I used to.

do a frat gig in uh in Boulder up at CU. where they would make all the pledges. wear a pink hat and it was just my job. to go in there and like pretty much MK. Ultra them like they would like give me. information on these kids and it was my. job to like roast them to the point of. wanting to quit the [ __ ]. fraternity and it paid like you know. $800 and I was like yes this is the. greatest in the world so then you're. just like Chinese wrong uh look at this. guy clearly gay you know like all the. Frack guys are in the back being like. yes he's doing it.

yes has two moms lesbian parents you. know like how does he know. this clubfoot oh that's hilarious yeah. dude where are my AV Brothers at yes. where's the AV room boys at those are. the original tech people yeah dude. remember the AV room mhm they would not. want you in there no no if you showed up. they'd say please leave sir sir this is. not for you you're like younger than. them and they're calling you sir did. that honey get you a little bit feel.

it's doing something probably we'll see. yeah we'll give it a little more time I. thought I was going to freak out and. like take my shirt off I was a little. worried about. that but I felt like it's worth the. gamble it was dude it's very good if I. [ __ ] it up we'll just do it again. another time yeah we'll just have a. redo I like it tonight's going to be fun. we'll have very excited um I'll be. confused in there CH stano's coming. tonight too sick man right on yeah so be. good time like Christie yeah he's in. town he's doing a gig tomorrow night at. the Paramount I think one of the big.

theaters up here I think I think that's. it that's where I first met egot Adam OT. he's [ __ ] man he's the greatest silly. [ __ ] we've become very good friends we. text each other music like we're dating. oh sweet yeah we have very like old. hardcore and [ __ ] oh look at you guys. maybe you're the one who put that. swastic up on my wall I couldn't get up. a ladder bit. son of a [ __ ] that's why you're so into. that thing I love the swan you're. laughing cuz it was you yes it was me. the whole time Joe it was so ridiculous. looking at it I was like why is it still.

here like I I understand that nobody. here made it but you got just [ __ ]. that should have been the first thing. that yeah you know about the Eiffel. Tower during the German occupation. they'd put a [ __ ] swwa on the top of. the Eiffel Tower like a big flag really. and every day Frenchmen would climb the. tower and they'd get shot down or fall. off until one of them got that [ __ ]. swastic off the tower yeah yeah they. they resisted pretty hard wow but think. about how Majestic that swwa must have. look flapping up there Jesus Christ yeah.

it's sort of like that um thing that. they did with SH Lao when he had that. website oh yeah and for got to the. bottom he not replace or he he would not. divide us yeah and then they use like. flight patterns and [ __ ] it was the most. brilliant thing that anyone's ever done. weaponized autism yeah it was amazing. and then do you know that uh Radio Lab. took the podcast down where they were. describing it no they had a whole. podcast about I heard that podcast why. did they take it down because they were. saying that fort fort Chan is associated.

with uh racism and homophobia and all. sorts of other things and it's just like. to elevate that website and to talk. about the and so they they decided to. delete it but I had already listened to. it by the time they deleted it is it. back up no you can find it I've just. found it but okay so here's what the. radio lab Lab Radio Lab has decided to. take down this episode some listeners. called us out called us out is a that's. so [ __ ] woke speak they called us out. saying that in telling the capture the.

flag story in the way that we did we. essentially condoned some pretty. despicable ideology and behavior no no. you're not you're just talking about a. thing that happened yeah you're just. giving information yeah to all the. listeners who felt that way and to. everyone else please know that we hear. you and that we take these criticisms to. heart I feel awful that the things we. said could be interpreted that way. that's on on us it was certainly not Our. intention and we apologized dude that's. [ __ ] lame that's [ __ ] [ __ ] right. there it's it doesn't make sense because.

if you listen to what it was it was like. they just thought that sha laou how do. you say it lauff lauff I think they just. thought he was being ridiculous yeah. they thought he was being self. aggrandizing and just a silly actor [ __ ]. very pretentious very pretentious and. they were like let's find that. [ __ ] I loved it I loved it I thought. it was hilar. I I mean there's no one connected to. that that's like when you when you're. reading that or seeing that and you're.

listening to that you just have like. internet Wizards figured out a way to. get to a spot where something annoying. was on the internet where dork was. flexing and they. won that's the wasp getting into the. honey peas dude they ate his larva they. ate his larva yeah and then the guy goes. up to the camera goes [ __ ]. sh is that still available can we hear. that see if you can find that cuz that. shit's amazing yeah I remember listening. to that Radio Lab and go that's so.

clever that those guys figure that out. and how did that get connected to. ideology how that just because some of. it exists on a an internet free website. like forchan where basically anything. goes it's just unmoderated free speech. that's what happens sometimes that. doesn't mean that the people who did. that are are in. lock step with any ideolog no they're. not Nazis because they figured out where. shy La boof's art installation was no. one knows like I mean no heard an.

argument I mean maybe there have been. ones about the people that actually did. it it all just like that that website is. bad so don't say that don't talk about. this awesome thing that happened that's. so condescending it's so paternalistic. to be like we can't give you this. information because it might make you. frown [ __ ] a dude kids are being used. to being treated that way that's why. they're demanding it like you should be. able to listen to an actual Nazi talk. because it's educational because you get. to see this like slippery logic they use.

and apply it to human beings how. disgusting it is and how it's always. been like that throughout history people. have othered people for whatever reason. and usually it's because it makes it. easier to subjugate them easier to. dominate them dude Hitler was no good. but he could move a crowd God damn could. he [ __ ] that guy killed that Wy. Austrian we watched a speech of uh his. versus uh who was it that we opposed it. put it opposite of Bernie. Mack I'm not scared of you [ __ ]. set versus that was amazing that was.

amazing that's like one of the best. opening lines ever have you seen Cory. hul at Sha's benefit dude no I haven't a. what you got Jam I was hoping this was. the [ __ ] child buff part but it's not is. this where they figured it out this is. the actual flag so this is the UN. unedited video. the fact that they figured this out is. just amazing rules that's just amazing. location found that's just amazing [ __ ].

shy shows all of the post that they made. going through it oh. man yeah they may put some music behind. this I can't so those the guys that did. it I honestly don't know foran is using. flight plans look at that go back go. back to that forchan is using forchan is. using flight P plans to locate that he. will not divide US flag godspeed Lads. this is what Happ the games begin this. is amazing when you don't get any [ __ ]. for long enough yeah man you're [ __ ].

with Nerds you know these guys are. dangerous yeah dude and they're having a. good time and they won they got his ass. they won so it was all worth it yeah do. you know what that must have felt like. when they got that flag it must have. been like when Isel adagia knocked out. Alex Perera right on about it you know. it's like this thing that you like how. did we do it that's when they got the. flag they put the oh. Fu 4:36 a.m. that's dedication they're. discipline they're up at 436 a.m. yeah.

capturing Flags that's also organic. Anarchy that's people working together. with like-minded ideals you know I'm a. fan yeah hell yeah of that kind of work. yes how did they take that episode down. the episode was really well done too. it's unfortunate because it doesn't. condone anything that's not true and. this whole they called us out like no. they didn't they complained about. something your work should stand for. itself and I thought it did it's silly. also you can't live in this bubble where. you don't know about ulterior modes of. thought you know like if you just found.

out about forchan from that radio L. episode that's on you for not being. engaged in the cultural conversation. that's [ __ ] that's one of the fears. that people have about Twitter oh yeah. when Elon took over yeah the fears they. have about Twitter is it basically. becomes four Chanel on. Wheels it's forchan with advertising. it's forchan owned by the the. biggest bil iaire troll that's ever. existed I mean Elon trolls people yeah. the only difference is there's girls on. Twitter there's none on forchan yeah.

there's probably no girls on for well. there are those uh incels that decide to. go trans you know there's like a word. now no there's a like a word for incels. that specifically decide to go trans. yeah they got like hyp Noe or whatever. what are they called Jamie do you know. how you doing over there with that honey. I'm loving it dude I'm coming alive yeah. it seems to be affecting you having a. nice time seem be different than it's. affecting me I'm wondering why I don't. know dude maybe because I'm a big fat. guy and you're cut from. marel have different metabolisms well I.

just I'm wondering like what is it about. the the honey that like cuz the other. guy that took well he took more than me. trans maxing I'm giggling this is a. subculture of young men who Embrace. trans identities not because they. believe they were born that the wrong. body but because they can't get no P. dude hear dud who ran the Discord cult. where he would uh like if you want to. get in and be able to see photos of. ladies like this you have to send me a. photo of yourself dressed up like a lady. like this that was like a way to prove.

that you were cool and then he was. blackmailing all these dudes being like. look he's transed we got his ass and. like threatening to send these pictures. to their family and then they would have. to send Bitcoin and [ __ ] to this guy the. problem with not being. funny cuz a photo of me and a dress is. worth $0 know dude like yeah okay I put. dress on so big deal yeah look at my. lipstick put some fake eyelashes on. [ __ ] I look like Rosie O'Donnell over. here someone got a photo of me like.

wearing high heels walking around in. girls underwear I'd be like yeah I did. that thought it was funny we're. bulletproof in that way in that way but. man if you're a banker and there's. pictures of you in a dress you're [ __ ]. man you're in [ __ ] deep [ __ ] yeah if. you work at like a college yeah you're. in deep [ __ ] when they're mad at you for. appropriating culture that's one thing. about working for the UFC if they caught. you like wearing a dress somewhere no. one would give a [ __ ] yeah they'd. probably like blow it up and put it in. the locker room they like see we're in.

inclusive exactly yeah we're making. friends all over let's go you in full. Tycoon over there let's go yeah when you. lean back with cigar it's. tycoon [ __ ] lighter dude keep this. thing lit I should have another one but. Ari stole it I keep blowing have two. here but AR should I think a m told him. he could have it though did I tell him. he could have it we were a little lit by. that. time so how many days you in town for Mr.

talent I leave on Thursday man nice I'm. doing your uh your lovely Comedy Club. tomorrow the little boy the fat man's in. the little boy yeah the the little room. is awesome it's such an intimate little. room it's such a cool little room that's. where uh Chappelle did his uh dude he. did the first night there the first show. mhm uh Shane and Chappelle was the show. ever in that room which is what an. amazing show I know I was here for South. by and Chappelle was going on and I had. to run over and do my South by shows and. I was like [ __ ] I want to stay here I.

want to experience it was pretty [ __ ]. dope yeah it was pretty dope it was cool. to have first of all it was cool to have. Louie in early because Louie gave me. some really really good advice and we. fixed some things because of his advice. like right before they were cement was. about to be poured We Shrunk the stage. in the little room it was Louis's advice. yeah and we dropped the ceiling down a. little bit in the little room and that. was also Louis's advice it was already a. pretty small ceiling but he's like drop. it down even more like make it flat like. right here I was like yeah okay yeah I.

can like Palm the ceiling in there yeah. and then um in the big room he had us. drop the main ceiling down as well it's. nice man it's it's nice to have it's. nice to have it set up that way and to. have guys like him and you know his. advice and to have uh Dave come down and. Dave just loved it and Dave's building. his own play place he's building his own. place in yell Springs in Ohio yeah it's. called The Firehouse it used to be an. actual Firehouse w Is there going to be. a pole to the stage I don't know that. would be cool that' be great I don't.

know if it's still there like you know I. mean maybe it's been something since. then but it used to be a firehouse and. um you know I mean having him come out. and checking this out and then he's like. dude now I'm inspired so whatever he's. going to do in yellow spring it's GNA be. very interesting because it's I think. he's doing 120 seats holy [ __ ] I think. he's doing a size size of little boy. damn dude yeah imagine that like you can. go to see Dave Chappelle at any given. night like in his backyard what a great. idea though like he's Dave Chappelle he.

could do that anywhere like why not why. not like build your own club and have. the people come to you because of course. they're going to come to see Dave. Chappelle be a vacation destination like. like your Club is people were from all. over the world last night that kill Tony. but I don't know how many hotels they. have in Yellow Springs probably build a. hotel build a [ __ ] hotel yeah dude. become the Monopoly then the neighbors. going to complain this da kill the. neighbors kill the neigh car I like how. you think immediately with the perfect. answer yeah yeah so his that spot's. going to be it's going to be interesting. to see more if more comics start doing.

this buying and opening. clubs I was with uh damn dude Shane's so. [ __ ] funny I was with Shane last. weekend and he was talking about the. club and just like how if you got a. bunch of like comedians in a room like. monkeys with a typewriter like they. would hammer it out and it would [ __ ]. look like your Club you know what I mean. it's perfect dude well it's it's you. know because it was built just for that. yeah I mean we had all this time you. know already had the employees lined up. you know so it was like there's all this.

time to just just do it right and you. assembled a squad dude you got like The. A Team in there it's pretty awesome yeah. they're awesome people yeah and now I. got to hang out with egot and we get to. sit in the back and say rude things to. each other and the fact that all this. has happening while like a really robust. Open Mic program is happening too dude. you got a farm team dude yeah kind of. like that a way yeah it's fun you should. be proud of yourself I'm excited I'm. excited about I mean it's um it's one of. those things you probably shouldn't. think about too much just just accept it.

I think that's why the honey is working. for me because this whole time I was. sitting here thinking I'm on The Joe. Rogan Experience and then the honey hit. and I'm like oh I'm just like trying to. keep a cigar lit and drinking a beer. with a cool. guy but that's what it really is yeah. that's what's weird about it being this. popular it's just hanging out I know but. you know this is like a really big deal. you know like maybe I'll sell out Cedar. Rapids this weekend well I hope you do. you're funny guy um it's uh it's nice to. be able to do it mhm I mean it's one of.

the cool things about yeah I love it. yeah. dude all these. skulls you know there's not that many of. us buddy out there in the world people. with skulls maybe no oh comedi oh. comedians there might be like a thousand. of us yeah you know yeah not that many I. I don't know dude I've been traveling. the world a a lot doing standup cuz like. that's a real upand cominging thing now. uh like Paris and uh you know like bris. laava and stuff Italy like Barcelona and.

there's a lot of comics out there but. good God American comedians are the best. to ever do it I'll say that it's our. [ __ ] yeah yeah it's like we invented the. timing we invented the whole Rhythm of. the thing it's like rock and about I. don't know what it is there's something. about the way like a lot of Europeans. are raised that it's a hurdle to get to. American stand end up less of a hurdle. for Australians they slide right into it. they're funny people though they're wild. um yeah my boy Monty Franklin's coming.

tonight too nice U but but in terms of. like uh English versus American there's. a few guys like this Ricky Jas and. there's a few guys who could really do. it but it's like it's it's a different. style of communication over there yeah. it doesn't necessarily apply that. directly without completely remapping. how you talk about things it's the whole. storytelling thing they do over there. dude yeah I mean Jim Jeff obviously he. rules that Connelly guy he's [ __ ]. good conell Scotland right but it's like. if you go to a place where it's English.

as a second language and you're the. American comedian you're bodying. everyone it's nuts it's a blood bath in. why do you think the level over here is. so much higher because we've been doing. it longer is that what it is I think so. and also like we value humor than a lot. more than other places do I think I. think also um it's real hard to develop. if you're the funniest guy in the room. oh yeah sure I think you have to have. people you aspire to yeah and that's one. of the more important things about uh. comedy communities and that's one of the. things that I thought a lot about when I.

first got here when I first got here. before I thought about like Jesus Christ. you really want to open up a [ __ ]. comedy is that really what you want to. do with your time you don't have time. already you don't have any time right. how you can do this but then I thought. like that's actually a very valuable. piece of the puzzle and the more I. didn't have it the more I was realizing. like like it's most of my fun at. nighttime is hanging out with comics and. talking most of my fun at nighttime it's. either you know like talking in the. green room or it's uh [ __ ] around.

after the show going and having a drink. or getting something to eat like that's. like some of the most fun times I have. that's why we're the luckiest people. dude cuz everywhere you go you hang out. with the funniest people in that City. yeah but if you don't have that if. you're just in you know whatever some. weird town somewhere and you start an. open mic night it's hard to get good oh. for sure you need like real Comics. around you like really good Comics. around you it's not even enough to be. watching it on YouTube you got to kind. of see it live yeah you got to. experience it live it's like you go on.

the road and then you meet someone. really funny in like South Bend or. Cincinnati and you're like Yo dude you. got to get the [ __ ] out of here you got. to go somewhere else cuz you're really. funny and you're not going to get as. funny as you can here and there's also a. thing that happens when Comics get. established and then they get their own. audience and then they bring the weakest. possible opening act and then they go on. afterwards only in front of their. audience and they look look like a hero. right yeah you know and it's it's it's a. weird thing because your act sort of. deteriorates without you even knowing it. right yeah you know you aify you get.

soft yeah yeah some [ __ ] goes wrong you. you don't you got to be around Killers. you got to be Bill bursted this once he. was talking about somebody and he goes. you got to do the clubs you got to do. the clubs these guys they get to a. certain point they stop doing the clubs. and it they their act falls apart yeah. it's 100% true like you got to do it in. front of five people small crowds medium. crowds and that's why we set up these. two rooms we have small and then a. regular 250 and 120 which is like the.

right numbers you know it's like 300 is. the magic number for a comedy club for. it to be intimate but still big you know. 300's the magic number so anywhere you. can get between like 250 and 300 is like. the sweet Zone it's like Comedy Works. yeah the sweet Zone you get to those big. [ __ ] standup live in Phoenix mhm. that's huge it's impersonal it's so big. it's like a small theater it's fun for. people in the front but it's like a. small theater you watch people do crowd. work in those big rooms and there's. people in back and it's like who's he.

talking to zero idea what see the back. of a head back there yeah they have zero. idea what's going on it's funny when. like when I was opening for Tim like uh. figuring out how to do comedy in front. of like 300 or 30 3600 people or. whatever it is cuz you can't do crowd. work you have to have an act yeah like. that's when I got super strong is I had. like a bulletproof 25 instead of relying. on like riffing or you know talking to. the crowd it's like no here are my jokes. and these are proven I can't imagine. those Arenas you dude those are [ __ ]. crazy dude those are weird but the.

they're actually kind of intimate if. it's in the round yeah I don't. necessarily think that an arena like uh. where the the the back is the stage and. you know the audience is in front of you. like normal is is as intimate as a. theater it's less intimate than a. theater but more people but when you're. in the round there's something about. being in the round that's more intimate. than a theater it's really weird because. you're surrounded by people and the.

people are seeing the other people like. everybody sees everybody and everybody's. enjoying one of the things about. laughter is it's contagious you're. actually seeing looking straight ahead. at people laughing it's kind of more fun. yeah and there's like this weird sort of. sense of like we're all here together. having a good time thing that is less. apparent when behind you is just stage. wall dude remember those Zoom shows you. ever do that [ __ ] no yeah you don't have. to no I wouldn't have done it I did it. it no just cuz it was like oh I'll.

entertain some people in the middle of. the day you know and they're just like. record oh god dude watch people bomb at. the Laugh Factory doing stand up for no. audience yes and it was so weird like. the the steps they were taken to make. sure everyone was. safe they put you in a giant hamster. bubble and [ __ ] roll you up to the. stage they bubble boyed you I would have. done that for sure I would have loved to. been the little imagine they develop a. hamster shoot and just roll out from the. Green Room okay uh Sam Talent ready to.

launch you roll onto the stage I would. have keep rolling dude that would go. right through the door gravity has a. weird effect on a man in my size so. people are on that stage with a. microphone and no audience yeah so weird. you need an audience you can't practice. stand up in a vacuum it doesn't work. that's why it's like the only like pure. way of entertaining look at Tim Dylan. when he does his show he has an audience. of one uhuh the producer yeah but he's a. once in a [ __ ] generation braster. dude yeah he is Tim's the dog he's a man.

I got to hang out with Tim so much see. him interact with people [ __ ] rules. he's the [ __ ] man the greatest Ranter. of all time he was. like some lady came in and was super. annoying in Australia and then he like. said some [ __ ] to her and he she left. and I was laughing and he was like. here's what people don't know I'm a new. money homosexual from long Island I'm a. problem people forget people forget. about me cuz I look like this no no I'm. nasty I was just like howling dude. slapping my.

legs he's the man he's the greatest he. put me on dude I [ __ ] loved him he's. so funny and he's such a good person. generous fun he's a fun guy that's the. weird thing about meeting crazy as [ __ ]. too oh sure yeah I love him yeah. undiagnosed you know there's definitely. some [ __ ] going. on but it makes good real estate choices. too dude [ __ ] rant though what what. he's doing is he's developing material. like in a laboratory yeah it's so good. because he's gotten that muscle of doing. that ranting is so strong now because.

he's used to putting them together it. was funny we were talking about it. because he's like all day long now I. can't you know I can't relax because I'm. thinking okay what am I going to [ __ ]. what's my take on this what am I going. to say about that I'm mad about this. what am I mad at you know what am I what. am I getting off about like oh right. because you you have to come up with all. of it yourself so you have to have like. valid things things going to capture. people I want to to see his take on. Dylan mulany I bet it's amazing I bet it. is nuanced and profound and vulgar and. smart I bet it's amazing dude Tim and I.

when we were on the road together he. would just like find a really expensive. house and arrange a viewing of the house. and we'd go in and like waste some. realtor's time for an. hour like she'd be like and these are. the windows and he'd be like very good. Charlotte you know and then she'd turn. and he'd be like dog [ __ ] trash I. wouldn't even kill someone in this room. hell sucks it could be good i' be back. why does he go and look at houses. because it's something to do on the road. that's so weird one time a lady took us. upstairs and it was like the downstairs. was beautiful the upstairs was just like. leftover materials total rush job and.

we're like oh [ __ ] and she like grabs us. and takes us into the bedroom and she. points at the fire alarms and she's like. these are about to be the industry. standard these These are big these are. going to take the World by storm and Tim. turns to me and he goes it's not good. when she's selling the fire. alarms you know the house is bad you. know the house is bad when that's the. selling point upstairs he told me like. he was talking about like what he does. on on the internet like um I like I. watch a lot of YouTube videos mostly. nonsense [ __ ] and he goes I'm on Zillow. he is dude Zill he's looking at houses.

constantly I know but I mean you got to. you mean that's what he his original. thing was subprime mortgages oh yeah he. scammed America part the crisis yeah. yeah he fleeced the nation bro have you. seen when he does Megan. McCain Megan McCain that is one of the. funniest [ __ ] things I've ever seen. in my life yeah apparently she doesn't. like it which. understand I can understand it's not a. slight against you that he does this by. the way that is not you yeah that is a. ridiculous comedic caricature yes he's.

invented a character it's a Lampoon. Megan yeah it's he's invented a. completely different character than you. uh he's just wouldn't it be. funny became was this insane yeah just. like holy [ __ ] also Megan McCain. secretly has huge breasts which Tim. pointed out to me oh are they secret I. don't know she does a good job keeping. them under wraps it's crazy when a gay. guy points out a cool set of Hooters and. you're like I want to see the world. through your eyes interesting yeah. interesting well he studied her yes he.

did yeah he studied her for that piece. like a predator yes like a bobcat. looking like that Falcon getting let. loose out of the window dude. yeah that's how Tim sees the world it's. prey oh yeah he's the man he is the man. I was so excited when he decided to come. out here too oh he's so excited about. being here let me tell you he loves it. in Austin he hates Austin the city know. he loves the club though but he hates. everywhere that's half the fun of Tim. dude Tim will call me and he's like I'm.

gonna get off the road for uh for a. couple months and then like a week later. I see his dates and it's like you were. you're a [ __ ] Gypsy dude he's not. going off the road no he loves it out. there he also keeps houses in a bunch of. different states he likes do he does y. but uh we talked about the week after he. moved here we had a deep freeze where it. [ __ ] rained freezing rain for like 5. days in a row and shut everything down. yeah and I had him on the podcast right. afterwards he goes we were considering. suing. you where the [ __ ] did you move me like.

that never happens dude it happened. again this year yeah it happens Tim will. call you and he's just in the middle of. a conversation he's been having with. himself you know yeah yeah he'll be like. Duncan trussell's got a puppet what's. going on. there that's how you say. hello is that okay are we allowing. puppets now it's good it works but it. could be it could be bad Tim the whole. trick to doing Tim is you say one thing. and then say it could be bad right right. you go the opposite way Bud Light. transgender could be good could be bad.

yeah this is what's stupid about the. world today our conversation about Bud. Light and Dillan Mulaney is going to. make news oh yeah the dumbest thing ever. uhhuh I'm on the side of uh everybody. having a nice cold Bud Light yeah I'm. not into Bud Light at all anyway so for. me can I have that other one yeah you. can nice it's not my thing thanks man I. get it people like a cold Bland drink. hey Tong take the day off I'm light like. AA yeah you like to test the metal of.

your. mouth but I just like I think it's funny. when people oh I saw a really funny one. uh somebody F took uh Travis trit. there's a photo of Travis trit uh and it. said like that Travis trit will no. longer sell uh anheiser Bush because of. Dylan Mulaney and then it said also. Travis trit and he's basically wearing. like the most feminine like Country. Leather outfit like a blue leather. outfit with like strings hanging down.

from it like one of the most unmanly. looking like tight leather pants high. heels yeah let's see if you can find. that dude we're so lucky we're Comics. cuz if we tried that [ __ ] we would get. lit up dude for sure there's so many. Comics who keep me grounded it rules. yeah yeah getting lit up is very very. important yeah the group chat no that's. not it but that's one of them it was he. was wearing like some that kind of [ __ ]. yeah that's it right there but it said. also Travis trit and show this.

outfit Navajo Grandma Trav imagine if. that guy came over he's dating your. daughter and wasn't Travis trit it was. Travis trit he gets a pass obviously. he's a superstar yeah but if it wasn't. Travis trit and this guy came over it's. like where do you work man my what do. you do that you have that outfit I saw. break pads you're going to [ __ ]. Chili's baby back r ribs with that. [ __ ] outfit on yeah what are you. doing buddy there it is that's the. picture that's the picture that's pict. is also Travis trit good for Travis good. for Travis low cut shirt that guy's not.

into transgender stuff but his hair he's. spent so much time in a salon that's. exactly the point yeah that's the point. maybe we hate what we fear we. are it's like that Guns and Roses song. Live and Let Die yeah. that's when I first came to LA right. after the Guns and Roses scene had. busted loose it's like. 1994 that's when I first came to La it.

was so different than man such a weird. place it was like this this like. launching pad for dreams that's what it. felt like when you got there everyone. was just there to pursue a dream there. was like electricity in the air when. you're in your. 20s and you're in LA and you're like. everyone's trying to make it people are. trying to get on sitcoms and yeah can go. out again of course yeah these you got. to they're tightly but they're nice. they're a nice pull but they're a little. tight he see that picture going around. with it too hell yeah so he was drinking.

Bud Light with a transgender person yeah. in 2003 hell yeah well he changed his. views people evolve people change Kid. Rock he got a little tense I mean I. think when it became so prevalent people. start to panic that's what it is you. know it's like what is happening here. like what are we doing. why is it so. prevalent people evolve maybe people. feel safer to come out and be themselves. it could be that it could be that it can. also be um people just like people are.

easily influenced in any way people are. influenced in a way that if if there was. something that came along anything that. came along that gave. you uh a sense of belonging to a group. and then a sense of being praised for. that and then a sense that you are on. you're in part of a new movement like. all those things are very attractive to. people no matter what it is if it. involves religion if it involves gender. if it involves uh whatever ideology if.

you all of a sudden can become a group. you're in a group you're you're praised. for being a part of that group and. praised for your decisions and you get. all this attention now and you also get. this feeling that you are on uh the. right side and you're there's a. righteous element to it this could be. with any and this is how you know people. get sucked into all sorts of stuff it's. and then there's also gender dysphoria. which is absolutely 100% real and it's a.

a psychological condition that's existed. forever they don't understand it because. biology is strange and that's the. reality of being a human being there's. so much variation there's so many. variables there's so many things that. can go right so many things that go. sideways so many things that are odd or. Queer as it were there weird things you. know that's why like like the one like. my number one beef with people that get. like really religious is the gay stuff. like what what do you want them to do. are you are you or are you not pro. Freedom right dude freedom is the big.

thing Liberty Pursuit of Happiness I'm. telling you these guys are happy when. they [ __ ] guys hell yeah good for them I. know a bunch of them they're all being. honest they're happier than me they're. doing great it's again go down Santa. Monica Boulevard there five blocks a. guy's having a great [ __ ] time go to. Tim Dylan's hotel room don't don't don't. go to Tim leave him. alone yeah no dude I just think that. it's really weird you can't unsee oh or. UNS.

smell there's just like people who are. so obsessed with the idea of expressing. themselves and they it mad at other. people for doing the same thing because. it weirds them out dude you know what I. think it is it's one of those things. where if you buy into this side of the. group you have to adopt a bunch of. different ideas and all those ideas like. you can't have very you can't be like. prolife but also think that we need to. take away all the guns oh yeah no one's. going to let you in their group no like. what what side are you on you crazy [ __ ]. you just you're you're a pro-life person.

who thinks that we should take. everyone's guns yeah no no no no. pro-life is over there with the First. Amendment you're carrying a m your mama. with a gun you know yeah you're on the. wrong team also Pro lifee you never. whoopsi in a girl in El Paso whoopsies. exactly what are you talking about yeah. well the conversation about that that. I've had with people is the with. religious people particularly this one. guy was very weird because it was like. his thought was at conception oh so I. was like what if it's the day of what. it's the day of and you can just take.

something and it vanishes we're talking. about like two cells yeah. nope no does two wrongs don't make a. right even under rape they were talking. about raping children being raped and I. was like you're out of your [ __ ] mind. this is crazy talk also it's not. pro-life or anti-life it's pro-choice. anti-choice that's the whole framew but. if I was a conspiracy theorist was a. real tinfoil hat guy I would say if I. wanted to keep everybody fighting. against each other I would my chess move. would make would be conservatives get.

rid of roie Wade let's get rid like. [ __ ] arms in the streets and then. liberals let's start pushing like let's. start pushing the most radical ideas and. try to make them mainstream the the most. radical ideas like exorbitant tax is for. the wealth income inequality like ignore. all the money the same side it's pumping. into the military industrial complex. ignore all the influence of the.

pharmaceutical companies just. concentrate on social ideas and push. them and and get wacky people in your. cabinet even if these people are totally. incompetent if you can say this is the. most diverse cabinet that's ever been. assembled and that's what they do say. yeah yeah and then you got that [ __ ]. crazy dude with the beard who wears a. dress who's non-b steals women's luggage. oh yeah that [ __ ] dude is we in the. White House in charge of like getting. rid of nuclear waste or some [ __ ] yeah. let's get a wig on that guy [ __ ]. amazing though when stuff like that.

happens if I wanted to keep people. divided and not pay attention to. centralized digital currency which. tulsey Gabbert's freaking out about now. that that they're trying to do that if I. wanted to keep people ignorant of that. stuff that's what I would do I would. move the cultural chess pieces in a way. that I have the loudest Fringe people. on this side and the loudest Fring. people on that side so that all the. people that generally agree on most. stuff don't ever get along because. they're either on this side or that side. and that side is represented by a dude.

with a beard and a dress who steals. women's luggage and this side is. represented by that [ __ ] lady who. assaulted me in a in Aspen it's like. Trump's our real president I knew you're. a patriot like oh no it's like who you. don't want to be associated with these. people you don't want to be associated. with these people you don't want to be. associated. antivaxers and you don't want to be. associated with you know whatever. [ __ ] Fillin the blank that this this. side hates there's. no but it's it's almost like it's.

engineered oh it is for sure they tried. to use class war and then people. realized that you know money does move. everything so they saw through that then. they tried to use race against each. other race got together so now it's. ideologies dude that's what they're. doing then they can do whatever they. [ __ ] want behind the curtain because. our eyes have the wool pulled over so. egregiously and then there's this. beautiful component of climate change. oh yeah they throw that in there too and. this is one that people duke it out over. the people on the right say it's not not. that big of a deal and it's like it's. it's it's a natural cycle and it's a.

this and a that and most of these people. are they're pumping out these narratives. without even really paying attention to. the facts and then there's other people. that say we're going to boil in 30 years. the the ocean's going to boil we're all. going to die yeah but the more time goes. on the more we look at this this whole. uh trend of of the weather the more it. occurs to me at least it's never been. stable ever in the history of the world. it's all [ __ ] like this and that and. it goes Ice Age and it gets crazy hot. and it goes cold again it's like it's. always done that it's not like if we.

don't do anything it just stays stable. so let's just say that right away if if. even if we didn't exist this [ __ ]. thing is not stable even if we did not. exist so then the question is how much. do we affect it and we definitely affect. it for sure there's no CH there's no. chance we don't we're pumping gas into. the atmosphere like what kind effect. it's it's having a warming effect like. how bad is that warming effect that's. what we need to know and what do we have. to do to stop that warming effect or at. least slow down that warming effect. that's what we need to know but all this.

[ __ ] panic and hysteria and you need. to get rid of this and get rid of that. we're going to go all electric like what. the [ __ ] are you talking about you what. are you Pro lithium mining in the Congo. is that what you are are are you Pro. child slavery to get cobalt so where are. you getting these batteries how you. getting how are you getting 8 billion. people to move around electric cars. where do you get those minerals you. don't they don't they literally don't. exist no there's not enough there's not. enough but there's also no ethical. consumption under capitalism and all. that [ __ ] Marxist stuff you know. that's like true but also sounds tried.

at this point so it's like I think that. we'll be lucky if we make it to a 100. years to see the Seas boil without some. kind of economic collapse crushing us so. we're out there selling our holes for. bullets and salt well I think we're. going to have an economic collapse but I. don't think the whole world will I think. what happens if Mo on the world though. for now but what happens is what always. happens a new Empire takes over sure. China China's using quantum computers to. hack all of our [ __ ] [ __ ] dude. they're saving all of our information to. the point where they can get quantum.

computers and then they can hack. everyone's PIN codes and bank accounts. and just steal all the money from. America that's the big move whoa yeah so. that's Tik Tok so yeah ex well that's. part of it dud TI Tok is the Trojan. Horse. yeah uh oh I got to put my money in Gold. yeah dude so what you know there's only. enough did you just see this I saw this. the other day the amount of gold in the. world is so small it's crazy the amount. of gold in the world is something like. 75 ft Square what yeah I thought they.

had vaults full of it from floor to. ceiling I thought so too the am the. actual amount of gold in the world they. said was like the size of a cricket. pitch what we got something like that is. that [ __ ] no it goes up we got to. leave here and go get some gold like. it's volume it's not just going to cover. it right but yeah but I don't I mean. like the size but 75 ft square has like. a solid brick that's like it's showing. pictures of it on the W yeah yeah but. it's like it's but it it show can you. show me what it looked like on the.

wheelon for it it's towering okay it's. but still but it's still not that much. that's the whole world yes so it's it's. like half of a twin tower so it's 75 ft. high and how long is it it it's using. very strange ways what is it saying. metric tons okay so it's only it's 28,00. 874 tons of gold has been mined. throughout history of which around 2/3. have been mined since 1950 and since. gold is virtually indestructible this.

means almost all of this metal is still. around in one form or another wow but is. owning gold GNA help you when I'm like. on a Leash from a warlord you know. they're eating off my back you do you. know the most fun conspiracy theory. about gold no it's a really good one um. it's from the uh work of Zechariah sitan. who was one of the guys who uh. translated the ancient Sumerian texts. and he believed that the uh human race. is a product of accelerated Evolution.

and that the Sumerian text depicts these. Godlike beings called the Anunnaki who. come here from a planet called Nibiru. that's on an elliptical orbit every. 3,600 years it comes between us and Mars. and causes cataclysms because of the. gravity and all the chaos and but that. these beings came down here and inserted. their DNA into lowerer primates and. created this this being and one of the. reasons why it came here is because gold. is very difficult to find in the.

universe now if that's the truth about. the Earth only has that much gold. imagine that one of the reasons why. these beings gave us this desire to have. gold why gold was so popular always. early on and it was a useless metal so. what it was pretty why why how come you. could buy a house with bags of gold. shouldn't you have steel for a sword or. for arrowheads or something like that. well anything would be more salt was. very valuable time but this is different. because this is like a form of money. like why has it universally been. regarded as valuable like really early.

on and what he said was that they. realized that they could take these. suspended particles of gold and put them. in their atmosphere and it would protect. them because their atmosphere was. eroding and so this would be like a. reflective like reflective particles. they in the atmosphere like what Bill. Gates wants to do where he like blocks. so this is what's crazy about this this. guy wrote about this in like the 1970s. he wrote this the what is it called the. 12th Planet I think um that was the. first of them he I think he wrote.

multiple books on this uh on the Samaran. text but in I think it was like the. 1970s or somewhere around then they were. having this sort of Symposium on what to. do uh in the sense of uh like ozone. depletion and climate change like is. there a way to suspend reflective. particles in the atmosphere to block out. some of the harmful rays of the Sun so. that was their idea so what this this. book is trying to say is the reason why. humans are obsessed with gold is cu like.

the aliens designed us to mine and get. the gold and then they would use that. gold to protect their atmosphere so they. impregnated us with this idea that gold. has value yeah because they need it to. enhance their ability to keep living. it's a fun idea fun IDE if you're doing. bong and you're like watchic honey and. you hear Joe Rogan saying it in your. head it's it's cool when you see. Zacharias hitchen too because he's this. like very scholarly looking gentleman.

with an awesome name and he's like. pointing out all these different things. like the caducus the sign of uh um. medicine like the universal sign of. medicine he's like that's the double. helix of DNA that's what that is that's. why it snakes around like that and he. says and it it represents medicine in. ancient SU it also like it's present in. these very weird uh stone tablets some. of these stone tablets have images of. this like enormous being with this.

humanlike creature on its lap but the. thing has a tail W it's really weird. it's really weird stuff and it also they. also had a depiction of the entire solar. system all the planets in the solar. system and roughly the same size and. roughly the same place so they had an. idea of what planets were out there in. 6,000 BC yeah or whatever it was 5,000. BC that's [ __ ] insane it doesn't make. any sense based on everything we know. now it's [ __ ] insane and it's wild to. look at like you see this clay tablet it.

has what is like clearly the sun in the. center like look at this thing how Wild. is that are the anunaki the albino ones. are those the albino aliens um I don't. know that I don't know anything about. that I only like familiar with the. Chariots of the Gods type [ __ ] yeah. Chariots of the god is interesting too I. met that guy really yeah Eric Anakin. yeah I went to um a lunch it's very. wealthy guy that I know is interested in. this kind of stuff and I think uh I. think one of his friends was as well and.

so they decided to have this guy come. over and they said you know like do you. know anybody who knows a lot about this. stuff and then my friend called me up. and said you want to come and talk to. Eric Von danin yes I was like. yes this guy was asking him all these. questions I think he's a True Believer. he's a True Believer is a True Believer. that all these things are created by. aliens whether it's the pyramids or all. these other structures that are. impossible to do. today uh I'm a believer that all those.

structures are most likely the evidence. of a super Advanced civilization that. existed that got wiped out by meteors. and also that they like conducted energy. right they did something different than. we're doing no one really knows and. they're all built along the same lines. right like the nasda lines some of them. are I mean there's uh that's that the. nascal lines is different that's um. that's in Peru that's really interesting. stuff cuz there these enormous uh things. that are laid out on the sand or on the. ground that you can't see unless you're.

in the sky it's real weird and some of. them look like Landing strips it's like. what what were they doing I have no idea. yeah no one knows no I think most of. that stuff that they keep finding like. the structures of gockley teepe and all. these other structures they find around. the world they don't really know where. they came from I think a lot of that is. probably evidence of some [ __ ] that. existed a long time ago and they got. wiped out a purpose globally too though. there had to be some kind of like mass. communication to arrange those. structures right well at least in the.

people that in were in that area what's. interesting to me is the most. spectacular ones all came from Africa. and we know human beings all came from. Africa and the most spectacular ever in. the history of humanity still exist in. Egypt and they're like you know the very. most recent they could be is like like. 4,500 years old which is bananas dude. it's bananas it's like what was going on. down then also all those cities like the. one in Peru that's built like Machu.

Pichu 12,000 ft or whatever how do you. get the [ __ ] Stones up there dude the. [ __ ] did that happen I'm going down. there with my dad in May the wackiest. Theory I heard was that that that used. to be uh at the base of water and that. everything out in front of that at one. point in time many many many many. thousands of years ago was all water. yeah. effectively been substantiated or that. might be just a wacky Theory but if it's. not how did they do that dude and how do. they they made them so they're all like. kind of Jigsaw pieces and they all slide.

right into each other and they're. [ __ ] enormous and they're perfectly. fit together it's not just like random. like fill in with mortar no these guys. are artists and and engineers and. wizards like how the [ __ ] did they do. that yeah it's crazy to be a Mason and. also be able to uh design some kind of. structure that can communicate Andor. create energy to empower people who live. almost 2 miles high that shit's Beyond. any kind of fathoming that I can do well. what's really weird is that a lot of. them have these structures that are.

designed um in Mirror of the cosmos too. so they're very aware of you know they. were very aware of all the stars in the. sky and all the constellations and they. they put that a lot of it in their. design they did it in Mexico the Aztec. did it the Mayans did. it just imagine if there's one time I. could go back and see what the [ __ ] was. life like I think it would be ancient. Egypt okay like what were you guys doing. how the [ __ ] did you do this like what. was what was life like what what what.

kind of people were around back then we. have like some bodies but the bodies a. lot do you know that. Cleopatra she lived closer to the. invention of the iPhone than she did to. the construction of the pyramids No yeah. no that Cleopatra was not that long ago. whoa when was she around I think a. couple thousand years ago holy [ __ ]. yeah see that what time was Cleopatra. though around died somewhere in the. range of 50 to 30 BC yeah so little less.

than 2,000 years ago yeah and then the. pyramids were 2,500 years at least. before that [ __ ] dude and maybe more. what about the maues those dudes who. navigated all the way to Hawaii in. [ __ ] kayaks by by Stars [ __ ] Kayo. I'd go back there I'd see what those. boys were up to hardcore [ __ ] you just. launch off of your Island and you're. like fingers crossed we're going to find. some other [ __ ] out there fingers cross. you caught they knew or someone told.

them there was [ __ ] out there that's. what I'm talking about well I bet they. went on fishing voyages and I bet they. just kept going further and further out. if you do it over time and you figure. out how to get back they probably just I. don't think they did it all one crazy. trip no but I think that they had. Expeditions that they would probably. report back from lesser Islands come. back be like now we have set up over. here right cuz you probably didn't even. know where the islands were no the fu. fingers crossed you're going to find. land imagine finding Hawaii yeah imagine.

you're you're out there in the middle of. the ocean like dude I think we're [ __ ]. we're going to die out here yeah like I. I think we're only in the middle so we. don't have any more water all we have is. coconut milk and then all a sudden you. look and you see waterfalls and [ __ ]. you're. like no wonder why they're so happy. they're stoked yeah it's like always. been a vacation spot yeah and also I. understand why they defended it so hard. [ __ ] yeah yeah it's like you're right to. be mad at the Dole Corporation you know. well it's also weird that that's I mean. I think it deserves all the protection. of America don't get me wrong but it's.

weird that Hawaii is in its Zone country. because it's five hours in a plane over. the ocean you're pretty much in Japan. you're in the middle yeah you're really. it's I think it's the most remote place. you can travel to the most remote large. city is. Honolulu yeah there's a million people. in honolu for sure yeah most of them are. Japanese really oh yeah dude that city. is like all like it's built on like the. Japanese like way of life that's why. they're so efficient and the buses in. Honolulu are always on time no [ __ ] yeah.

and that food they have out there I get. it I get why they're Furious that. they've been ruined by American. capitalism by people with Hawaiian. shirts yeah exactly like big fat guys. like me out there just ruining their. sunsets with my weird nude body just. drinking and get drunk and wanted. where's the [ __ ] Lu out bro why is. there gravy on your. hamburgers they do have gravy in their. hamburgers they call that that's right. molco yeah yeah it's just like guys like.

me chugging those having a bunch of Bud. Lights going down to the water hunting. wild pigs oh dude how about those dudes. who hunt they wear like they have their. dogs wearing bore vests do you know. about that [ __ ] of course you know about. that [ __ ] yeah I know about that [ __ ]. that's wild that in Arkansas they do it. in Hawaii too buddy yeah yeah they the. dogs hold the board down then they stab. it glad those dogs haven't got me yeah. that's a rough way to do it man yeah. Savage by dos yeah but the thing is it's.

like with a lot of those pigs you can't. get to them like they're really smart. they smell you and they take off a. million miles away and like the winds in. Hawaii swirl all over the place it's. very difficult for a person to like do. anything about invasive species without. some help pigs are so smart that's why. they use dogs yeah it's because of the. terrain for the most part it's it's. rough man the dogs like clamp down on. they use Pit Bulls and the pit bulls. clamp down on the uh the boes and hold.

them in place and they get [ __ ] up by. those bores oh they get [ __ ] up they. get [ __ ] up bad I mean bore I'll show. you a boar that I shot in California I. have the skull out here all right the. teeth are [ __ ] bizarre man they're. they're these crazy choppers that come. out like this far like almost like. halfway up his face and they sharpen. each other as they close no yeah oh no. that's um that's another animal that's. um Havalina Havalina their teeth sharpen. each other as they close javalinas have.

crazy sharp teeth so throughout their. life they're just constantly getting. more and more honed well it's just like. keeps it sharp like I don't have it here. but I have one that I shot and I turned. into chizo and you uh when you run your. finger across the the blade of its skull. it's like whoa like that the blade that. comes out of the bottom teeth that's. what they look like w so they close and. they they they actually sharpen each. other they scissor the bottom ones are. [ __ ] crazy look at that that would. destroy your leg that's what it looks.

like see that picture of it with its. mouth open that's what it looks like go. to the one that's actually. alive that's fake that's a real one when. they um do a mount like that that's not. their real teeth or their real tongue. that looks like a little pig bear I know. it's not even a pig it's a cousin of a. pig it's called a Peery oh it's a. different kind of animal they're all. over like Oklahoma on the side of the. road you'll see you could eat them they. taste good if you prepare them correctly. I made chorizo and eggs the other day. with Havalina meat I'd eat that [ __ ].

easy whack they scream look how they. make crazy nois look how aerodynamic it. is yeah look at him go it looks. Regal that's me in the water they make. crazy little demon. noises I was uh pig hunting once and we. were um we were walking down this uh. dirt tra Rail and there was just really. high grass to the to the right of us and. inside the high grass yeah that's the. noises they make going after that pump. that's the. noises get along boys bro I mean they.

sound like little demons yeah they're. mean and they won't share that that. pumpkin but uh we were uh we were. walking down this Trail and to the right. of us it was this High Grass and inside. were wild pigs were fighting and dude it. sounded like demon [ __ ] it sounded like. Lord of the Ring stuff it's. I was like Jesus Christ like moror like. if they if we were hunting demons and. that that's just what they looked like. turn around it'd be terrifying like.

hearing that noise coming out of the. grass I was like what the [ __ ] they will. charge you too yeah that's what's scary. about wild pigs they'll [ __ ] go after. you don't pigs turn pharoh like within. two weeks or something crazy I think. it's like they start to morph within. five or six weeks yeah they grow tusks. like real quick within a year well their. Facey long Gates yeah that's like this. was all explained to me by Steve Rella. he was the guy actually that I was pig. hunting with when we heard him in the. grass like demons it was the craziest. noise dude um so he said that this one.

species you know people say wild bores. and wild he it's all one species it's. called sus scraa and they're all like. interchangeable they just select breed. them for different things but it's one. species which is nuts so so like when. like a domestic Pig gets out like some. of these pigs did they like you ever. heard of Hogzilla yeah Hogzilla was this. giant wild board they caught he said. that's most likely that was a domestic. pig that somebody fattened up and got. real enormous then it broke out and it. just made its way to the woods so your.

classic pink pig became Hogzilla they're. their their hair changes it gets thicker. and darker and they just look totally. different nature it's wild dude because. it's like they're like Gremlins yeah you. like the Gremlins and they feed them. after midnight that's what happens to. the pigs they're like we're cool as long. as you feed us and keep us in a [ __ ]. bar yeah keep us in this like contained. fenced area we're good that's like the. majority of Americans and then as soon. as like you can't get food anymore. they're going to turn and start eating.

each other that's what it is we're going. to be [ __ ] eating each other's kids. and [ __ ] yeah yeah yeah the last of us I. don't think I'll do well in that. situation you might rise to the occasion. buddy dude I'm trying cuz like comedians. will be the first against the wall and. they'll use like my back for leather for. their chariots like my wife doctor so. she's going to be very valuable they're. going to want her right I'll just be. like an ax you know I'll have a yoke in. my mouth pulling the carts maybe your a. football and wrestling experience could. come in handy oh I would I would easily.

I would [ __ ] eat someone real quick. dude how quick easy I soon as I need out. for two months two months four and a. half days and I'm going next door with. my Mossberg being like what do you got. in here who's ripe hand it over I have. no problem with cannibalism for some. reason would you want to kill and eat. the people that were a problem first. just like clean up Society Dexter Style. no I'm still lazy it'd be. proximity it would be whatever was in my. grasp I bet you wouldn't be lazy you'd. probably lose a lot of weight your. joints would feel better oh yeah cuz you.

wouldn't be doing whatever you're doing. now you'd be trying to find food. whatever I'm so you would also like only. be drinking water cuz that's probably. all that's available uhhuh once. everybody like cleans out all the. warehouses of soda M there's going to be. a few people that hoard soda be a thing. like you bust it open for speci special. occasions hey I got a bottle of Dr. Pepper in the in the in the basement I. got some vintage surge over here yeah. they'll bust out a [ __ ] Pepsi he's. got Pepsi he still got bubbles yeah be a.

can this big it' be like eight glasses. yeah dud yeah this is amazing it be. Sacrament at that point right yeah that. would be what would happen Pepsi would. become our sacred beverage that we would. drink on weddings and you know if you. were super rich a new King RC Cola. that's how you know you made it in the. apocalypse no Jones Jones so like Jones. is good yeah that's what I'm saying you. have a case if you have a case of like. some [ __ ] yeah some Artisan soda yeah. yeah it's like we're watching this show. Yellow Jackets me and my wife and.

they're all like upset about having to. eat one of their friends I don't give. Yellow Jackets they eat their friends. there's a bunch of girls who got like. you said that so easily well yeah. it's it's. fictional it's not a documentary but. these girls get like trapped in the. woods on like a they're on like a soccer. team or whatever and their plane goes. down and they have to eat one of the. girls after she dies it's like she's. already dead yeah if she's already dead. it's not that big of a Munch her but. here's the issue with eating someone. after they died if they starve they. don't have any nutrients in their body. so eating them yeah like they've already.

leeched all the nutrients out to go to. their liver and heart what's up what you. hearing this like shipwreck books really. yeah I've read a lot of books about like. uh shipwrecks their meat won't have it's. not yeah it's not valuable if they're. starving to death yeah because they've. like used all of their nutrients to keep. their organs alive. huh yeah it's like eating styrofoam at. that that makes sense because if you eat. healthy things it's probably healthier. that's why Wild game so good for you. right that makes sense like eating. Elkart rules compared to eating just. like a guy who died in the hospital guy.

who got cannibalism It's Perfectly. Natural a new scientific history argues. okay whatever are they that's what. they're trying to normalize next after. they normalize the dolly llama where do. these Libs end is that what they're. doing [ __ ] cannibalism first you want. to indoctrinate my kid. suck on my tongue you want minor what is. it minor attracted people they tried. that one for a little while Fu that [ __ ]. dude [ __ ] out of here that's out of here. I'm eating your ass first 100% dude yeah.

yeah get them while the nutrients are. hot yeah oh give me that give that P me. minor attracted people what the [ __ ] F. you dude yeah I haven't heard of the. medicinal cannibal. what I hadn't heard of the medicinal. cannibalism you described in Europe. starting with ancient Greek physician. gallon of pergamon and continued to the. 20th century that was one thing that. really surprised me what I told you they. used to eat the mummies skulls yeah and. then the mumia stuff so yeah they they.

used to have U mummy unwrapping at like. fancy par yeah so if you went to Tim. Dylan's house hey I'm having a mummy on. rapping come by I'm going to wear a. Rolex on both. wrists I'm going to have a headband it's. a Rolex and he's going to [ __ ] unwrap. mummies take a scoop full and put it in. your tea that was like great adby [ __ ]. right Gilded Age yeah yeah I love that. movie with Leonardo DiCaprio he's the. man I love the fake car like a car that. didn't really exist like there was no.

car that drove that well back then I. never realized that those cars were [ __ ]. huh that movie The Great Gatsby that car. that he has is like aesto mod it's like. a modern version of an old car that. thing was the [ __ ] w i remember watching. that thing going that is so much better. than any car that existed back then like. what is that thing supposed to be huh. like that thing when he drove it around. that thing is amazing look at that hat. like the way that thing drove in that. movie is like literally impossible for. one of those things those things were. dog.

[ __ ] the great gats old one that's older. one those white wall tires so that's a. real one but let me tell you something. if you drove that it drives like dog. [ __ ] but now look at his look at Leonard. Caprio one look at that thing with the. [ __ ] pipes and all that [ __ ] oh yeah. see all that [ __ ] wild action inside. the the engine compartment that's all. fake that didn't exist back then if it. did I'd have one i' be like I need that. [ __ ] thing in my life that thing is. awesome I love old cars but I don't see.

those things drive like dog [ __ ] that's. the problem I like when a car looks like. a snubnosed pistol that looks pretty. dope that's sick that looks pretty dope. but it's like those car like the one. Leonardo Caprio had if you watch see if. you can find him driving in the movie it. behaves in a way that no car from that. era can it moves moves like like a. modern car it moves fast and it's like. it handles it's like no no no no no see. if you can find like some video of him. driving him and Toby it's beautiful.

looking though man they're on the way to. get some. [ __ ] look. at see how it's cornering and [ __ ] all. that like not going to happen that. you're dead that thing spinning out it's. 90% of it weights in the front it's got. zero horsepower what does that [ __ ]. thing have for horsepower like go back. to one of them old ones and to tell me. what they have that old yellow one that. looked like it see what what horsepower. it had I'm going guess I bet it had 100.

horsepower let's guess 100 I'll take the. under yeah it's got to be under it's. probably under yeah I'm probably way. overestimating so oh that's not the. right one okay thank God what year was. it 1928 wow okay I'm under now I'm under. 100 maybe 95 95 horsepower it's crazy he. wrote that book and at the same time. Sherwood Anderson was writing like. weinburg Ohio about people eating dirt.

it's like these were two parallel. thinking in like uh like the modern. novel at that point it was nuts man well. that's happening right now right oh in. Haiti they're eating dirt all the time I. mean you have people in some parts of. the world that are essentially starving. to death and drinking out of Puddles. right for sure and then you have. succession right yeah you know don't. spoil it I'm not spoiling all right it's. great though I know but you know you. have like these [ __ ] spoiled rich. kids and their crazy dad and people get. excited about it 20 horsepower 20 20. yeah that's what I'm saying let me tell.

you something in 20 horsepower you're. not doing any of that fish tailing. you're not doing any of that driving. real fast like all that stuff that that. thing is slow as [ __ ] feel like between. the two of us we have 10 horsepower at. least yeah at least 10 [ __ ] horses. hell yeah dude little miniature. ponies no we probably don't even have a. horse maybe no no way man we could pull. no no no a hor horses carry people for. days I've given some long picky back. rides [ __ ] ass engine whoa 1923 the.

Merlin 23 this has 1,200 horsepower it. says what it's a V12 no that's what it. says maybe that's augmented that's why I. was taking is that but is that an engine. for a plane about to say it might not be. for a car is that for a plane probably. that's crazy that's probably huge right. yeah Arrow Engine list of yeah it's in. Marine variants Jamie yeah yeah okay Al. so that's a marine engine oh they. probably make like crazy yacht engines. too yeah that's why I the first one I. found was bringing this up a $28 million.

yacht inspired Rolls-Royce that had like. 500 horsepower what the Rolls-Royce is. $28 million this thing what the [ __ ]. Jay-Z bought one of course he did I'd. buy one if I was Jay-Z too you kind of. have to have one if you're Jay-Z it's. part package you got to stunt you got to. have a $2 million rishard mle watch what. are those. called rishard mle yeah that's it you. can't have Beyonce pushing around in. like a 2007 Impala.

exactly look at that. thing it's pretty but it's not $20. million pretty I get it it's pretty sick. though the boat tail has Echoes of. something that it went away look at that. twodo removable roof removable Roof oh. the deck lid splits in two that's pretty. sick reveals an AIC picnic camper what. what what look at this there's [ __ ]. glasses and champagne and [ __ ] in the.

back it pops open that's what people. want oh my God what a piece of [ __ ]. you'd have to be to get that car drive. to a picnic the only car on podcast. island is this yes our only car on. podcast Island yes but that's half the. cost of the [ __ ] Island that's what's. crazy yeah the Island's like 40 million. oh you got that lying around we're. thinking yeah think get that Island dude. think should make that podcast Island. would be a hilarious goof would be. hilarious get recorded there only what's. that protect our Island yeah yeah we. only do protect our parks there we're.

here to protect this island we heard it. it's going to be taken over by the. bankers we decided to claim it for [ __ ]. [Laughter]. talking well all right Sam I think we. did at least three hours right yeah man. how many we do three out of three three. um tell everybody your Instagram and all. that jazz your social media my Instagram. is Sam Talent t l l n t is that your. real name yeah really yeah what are the. odds why would I have chosen talent and. spelled it wrong cuz you're talented.

right it's like it's better though it. looks like fake T maybe regular Sam. Talent was already taken so right there. man yeah bu Sam Talent 69 that's what I. would think happen yeah. 420 read the novel running the lights. right here yeah um buy it off my website. by the way [ __ ] Amazon buy it off Sam. talent.com and I'll give you a signed. copy oh there you go ship it out there's. an audio book if you're dumb uh that's. me yeah yeah I love audio books you're.

busy though son of a [ __ ] you're on the. mo did you read it no I had uh Bert ker. Tim Dylan uh I had 15 different Comics. read every chapter the bir One's Gonna. be tough but I'll get through it he did. the first one I got Ari Dan Soder they. David Bor they all did great jobs. beautiful all right fantastic see me on. the road go see Sam Talon and if you. hear this you won't even know that he's. here tonight so because it comes out. tomorrow yeah no it comes out tomorrow. I'm there tomorrow yeah yeah that's me.

4:12 but it's already sold out so tough. [ __ ] oh that's good yeah that's good. news that's it thank you for having me. Joe thank you I really enjoyed it. brother thank you you're very funny guy. and I really appreciate it very fun all. right bye everybody. [Music]. [Applause]. [Music].