Travis' Return, Mama Kelce Renovates & Conan O’Brien on Oscars Prep, Favorite Jokes & More | EP 182
You said you're trying some of these. jokes out in these comedy clubs. Would. you try some of them out with us right. now? We don't have to put it in the. episode. We can cut them. >> I absolutely will not. >> Dang it. It's all right. Fair enough. Fair enough. And I don't trust you. I'm. going to be honest with you. I don't. trust you. >> That is very fair. >> You have a great reputation. You seem. like good guys. You're wholesome Ohio. boys, but I don't I think you're going. to leak these. You're going to [ __ ] me. [laughter] over. And you're going to you're going to. laugh and then you're going to high five. each other.
Gosh, this is going to be such a. lousy show after They ain't going to. really put it in for an hour, dude. >> got some good stuff to talk about, Travis. It's not going to be Conan, but. it'll still be a good show. Yeah, I I. barely ever look at the rundown. I. looked a little bit at Conan's rundown, but Well, I mean, have you been paying. attention? I mean, 87's coming back. How about that? >> Come on now. Come on now. >> Yeah, we're doing it again. It'll be. fun. Get to reunite with my friends. Do. we want to wait for the the intro, or. should we just talk about it now? Well,
at what point did you know for sure you. were coming back? About midway THROUGH THE SEASON. >> [laughter]. >> SO, WHAT WERE YOU WAITING ON THEN? YOU. KNOW, I think uh I was taking Jason. Kelce's advice. I was taking the advice. to take a step back, because you don't. you you got to let the emotions clear, and you got to have a clear head. I've. made decisions based off of emotions, and you know, they haven't always played. out the right way. So, I think uh taking. a step back, letting the emotions settle.
down, the frustrations from the season. Of course, I want to come back. Of. course, I don't want to end my career. not making the playoffs, and not having. one of the best years, and then and you. know, definitely having a down year and. uh and all that. So, I think taking a. step back and like letting it kind of. kind of build and you know, what's my. desire? What's my. what's my you know, what's my body feel. like? How did I feel going into this. year versus coming out of this year and. and where my body was at? And um.
you know, even letting it kind of. settle, it's it still felt like I was. hungry enough to to get back at it and. um obviously there's still a little bit. of that that grit and that emotion that. you know, I I [ __ ] hated the way that. [ __ ] ended last year and um I want to do. this I want to I want to make it right, you know? I don't want to get another. chance in another [ __ ] Super Bowl, man. Yeah, I was about to say, so the. addition of Kenneth Walker and Patrick. Mahomes rehabilitation had nothing to do. with it? >> Uh no. No, I know I knew that Pat was. going to be Pat and he's going to work.
his [ __ ] tail off to get back and be. at his best. I I knew that was a. no-brainer. Um I knew Coach Reid was. going to make adjustments. I knew Veach. is going to do his best to get the best. guys in here. We've got Eric Bieniemy, one of my favorite coaches of all. [ __ ] time, coming back into the. building. But outside of I I I wanted to. take a step back from all of that. because that adds to the emotion of. wanting to play again. Sure. You know, those are all you you you list these. pros and cons and all of a sudden we get.
all these good pieces, but where's my. body at and where is my like mental you. like determination, my focus, my love. for the game, all of that's still there. So once I let that kind of settle and I. uh and the coaches and and and and the. Kansas City Chiefs knew all all that. going into the off-season, so. Well, welcome back. Let's uh let's welcome. back another episode New Heights. How. about that, Trav? You want to start it. off? LET DO IT. YEAH, BUDDY. WELCOME. BACK to New Heights, ladies and. gentlemen, boys and girls. It's a.
Wondery show brought to you by Hill's. Pet Nutrition. We are your hosts. I'm. Travis Kelce. This is my big brother, Jason Kelce, out in Cleveland Heights, Ohio. Shout out to those Tigers. upsetting St. Ignatius the other day, man. Shout out to the men's basketball. team uh making it through to the. regionals. Um we're all rooting for you, baby. Heights Tigers on the basketball. side are back, baby. Shout out to J.R. Bremer, uh, of Heights alum, as well. Made it to. the NBA. He's turned that program.
around, man. Cleveland Heights, baby. The Tigers are back, man. Um, but yeah, shout out to the Tigers. Shout out to. the Heights, uh, for for getting past St. Ignatius, man. St. Ignatius has always been a. powerhouse in all sports. >> But they're not basketball. Like this is. upsetting St. Ignatius, like Cleveland. Heights is somehow like big underdogs. against St. Cleveland Heights basketball. is freaking always one of the best teams. in the state. What are we talking about? Yeah. Notoriously, yeah. I mean, we're. definitely known as a basketball school, for sure. And Ignatius has kind of. always been, you know, a.
>> Shout out to Coach Cappalletti, baby. >> Coach Cap. Come on, Cap. Over 30 decades. built that program. Yeah, he did. Shout. out to Noah Blue for [ __ ] sinking a. shot to win it, uh, or with a dagger. I guess they won. [ __ ] like by 10 or whatever it was, cuz they weren't the underdogs. Nice. Make sure you subscribe on YouTube, uh, or wherever you get your podcast. And. follow the show on all social media at. New Heights Show with one S. Jason, why. don't you tell the people what we have.
coming UP THIS EPISODE. >> 92%ERS, WE'VE GOT another great episode. THE BIG YETI IS BACK FOR YEAR 14, MY. GOODNESS. >> We also have some other major home. renovation news, AND. CONAN O'BRIEN IS HERE! [screaming]. >> [groaning]. >> OH, YEAH. That's right, Bubba. Let's get. into it right now with a little bit of. that new news. >> New news. New news is brought to you by. American Express, and let's talk about. the most important news out of the. Kelsey family this week. Well, you know,
everybody's been waiting to hear about. it. Everybody's on edge of their seat, and we wanted to wait to break this news. on the show, but reports have already. started to leak out. >> Yes, everybody already knows about it, man. We got to talk about it. Yeah. As mentioned, the tweet that. leaked out. has been viewed over 24 million times. DONNA KELCE IS REMODELING HER MODEST. FLORIDA HOME. Let's give it up for. Donna. Mama. >> Give it up for Mama. Mama Kells. Mama. I told her if she. needed me to like screw some door hinges.
in, I could have [ __ ] done it for. her, but I guess she wants to do the. whole remodel. Yeah, I mean I got to say. I got to say modest home. Listen, Donna's changed. Nine windows and six. doors, Mom? Really? We are that spoiled now? You got. to do all your windows in that condo? Mama, I was just there. >> What's next? The golden plated toilet or. the score off speed diamond PLATED. [ __ ]. FAUCETS? I DON'T KNOW. MAMA, those doors.
seemed to work just fine when I was. there last month. What kind of doors is. she installing? I don't know. Maybe. she's got There's like a new like remote. control door you can like you just press. a button and it just opens up by itself. I don't know. Well, congratulations, Mom. >> I can't wait to see how beautiful this. home looks. It was already. it was already cozy. Which HGTV show do. we think is remodeling it? >> [laughter]. >> It was honestly the comments. Oh, it's. hilarious. All time. >> it's a completely absurd 24 million.
It's absolutely ridiculous. I hate to. give it to them, but TMZ, you guys. [ __ ] struck gold with that one. >> [laughter]. >> Really got the people going. >> I just really want to know what the. advertisement is for. Like what are what. are what are we It's got to be an HGTV. show, right? No chance. There's no. chance they're putting out a TMZ article. unless there's some type of like. advertisement of some sort tied to it. Nothing. >> No chance. All right. >> I promise you. This what happens when. your mom turns into.
reality TV. She's done it big time. She's on Traders remodeling her home. now. So proud of her. It is impressive. She's done it with grace. You've. changed, Mom. >> [laughter]. >> Don't you do that, sir. Well, if you need uh. any extra hard working men, we got two. of them sitting here waiting to help you. out. >> Yep, they're. right. over at the Home Depot. They're very. good. >> [laughter]. >> I got them on speed dial.
She doesn't want us replacing it. We're. going to [ __ ] it up. She'll have to. replace nine other windows. Why? Cuz we. >> them all the wrong way. I don't know how. to install a [ __ ] window. Put the. [ __ ] in there. I don't think That's. how You got to like. Nail it down. >> to make that You got to make that thing. airtight, especially the kind of windows. she's getting. >> Yeah, we're going to need a We're going. to need a ruler. The old Kelsey way. I. got I live to video this. >> Have you asked Mom about this? Have you. Have you talked to her about since this. came out? No. I have no idea what this. Should we ask her right now? Yeah, let's. call her. Let's see how baffled she is.
that anybody even knows this. How. [ __ ] good would it be if she isn't. doing this at all? I bet you a thousand. dollars it isn't HGTV. Mom. Yes. We are doing the podcast right now. I'm on with Travis. Mama. >> We said hi to you. We're She Yeah, he's. He's He He just said hi. We. >> are wondering. this tweet that has taken the world by. storm. It's what the heck? >> [laughter]. >> I know. Even TMZ, you know, like sent me.
a text and said, "Can you be on this? It's really funny." I'm like, "It's so. stupid.". >> [laughter]. >> You probably. probably pulled a permit because they're. coming out Monday. They put my windows. and doors in. Is it Is it like an HGTV. show or is this just like a legitimate. random. No, no, all I'm doing they is my my. people are coming to put in my windows. on Monday. Oh, nice. Well, at least. you're not doing it yourself, Mom. Wait, you're doing 16 windows? The article. says nine. It's because you know my.
whole apartment is all windows. It's. windows all the way around the house. do. you. >> What are you replace Are you going. bulletproof? What's happening here? What's What are we replacing the windows. with? Are you going bulletproof is a. banger. This year it got so cold down. here, it was in the 30s. And I literally. had sweat coming down the windows and. pools of water in my living room because. it couldn't handle it. It These are. cheap windows that were put in 20 years. ago. >> These damn Floridians, they don't know.
about the old Midwest windows. >> And I'm like, I'm not doing this again. So, I'm putting in new windows. So, I. called. uh New South and told them I wanted them. to put some windows in and this is the. date they picked. It was Monday, you. know, the 16th. And so, that's next. week, yeah. They'll be here for 3 days. and they're putting windows in. So, That's it, period. Well, I just wanted. to say, Mom, I They said Modest home and. I just It feels like you're turning this. place into a bit of a gilded palace, >> [snorts]. >> if I must say. So,
I think I think you've changed a little. bit. I think you've You You've You've. had a taste of the good life and now all. of the sudden What? [laughter]. Yeah. What? You know me. I'm. >> [cough]. >> so. You You know I am so like logical and. it's like I'm doing something so I can. save money on heating and air. conditioning and to keep my windows from. sweating. That's as simple as it is. I. know. I know. We're just giving you a. We're just We're just We're just having. fun with it, too. It's amazing and it's. hilarious in in a awesome way. We love.
you. And then, you know what Disney did? Disney Parks went out there and said. They took a picture of Cinderella's. castle and they said, "This is not what. Mama Chelsea is going to be renovating. her modest house into.". And so, I tweeted back and said, "That's correct. This is not what I'm. doing, but I. said. Yeah, I spend almost as much time there,
but I said, 'No.' It's not But I. consider it my second home. Well, while. they're remodeling the home, maybe. Disney will let you stay in the palace. as as the queen that you are. >> [laughter]. >> I think it's so funny. It's like doesn't. any Is there terrible things happening. in the world right now? Okay, we don't. need to talk about that. We don't need. to talk about that. We don't need to. talk about I I love you, Mama. Love you, Mom. Bye. Travis is screaming I love. you, too, as well. Oh, tell Travis I'm. so happy he's going back. I'm I'm. thrilled for another year.
>> All right, Mom. I love you. Long as Mama. prays I'm doing the right things. Say say bye to Mom. Bye. No, she didn't say bye. >> [laughter]. >> Yeah, can't wait to see what Mom's house. looks like. All golden windows and. bulletproof glass and all that. Yeah. I. mean, the TMZ article got 24 million. views. >> Oh. Insane. In the membrane. Inside of the brain. Sorry. All right, let's get to the actual biggest news. coming out. TRAVIS IS COMING BACK. [screaming] FOR YEAR 14. We talked about.
a little bit up front. Um Yeah. Trav. >> Yeah. What How we feeling? How we. feeling? You know, I'm feeling good. about the decision. I'm feeling excited. Been texting with a few of the guys on. the team. Uh just, you know, ready to get this. thing [ __ ] going, man. It's uh as you. know, it's it's not a just in-season. thing. It's something that I I truly. believe you need an entire off-season to. get the body, the mind ready for. training camp alone, and then training. camp you start to get that wear and tear.
and like you kind of build your own. armor of toughness to like get you. through the season. It's a year-long. thing that that I'm excited to get going. and um I'm excited to be around the guys. when OTAs come around and start to. really mold this team, man, get that get. that mentality back to where it needs to. be. Uh that that determination that that's. that, you know, expectations of. excellence every single day and uh and. doing it in our own way where we show. our personalities as we get this thing. [ __ ] roller, man. Dude, I'm excited. to see it. I'm I'm as a fan of my.
brother and as someone who loves. watching you play, I can't wait to watch. you play for another season. Very. excited also about the Kenneth Walker. signing because that guy is a beast. Can't wait to meet the old Super Bowl. MVP. God. damn, man. That guy is just this [ __ ]. He's unbelievable, man. He was explosive. all year round and. when Charbonnet went down, he really got. the chance to be the featured guy for. the most part. Like up in that carry. load I you cuz you always wonder. sometimes these explosive guys when they.
get the full workload if it's still got. that pop and it still had that pop, baby. >> now. Come on now. I'm not the only guy. excited for you. Uh your teammates are. all posting stuff. Patrick Mahomes. posted a carousel. Um. she's uh. >> [laughter]. >> What is What is this alarm clock in the. plane? What's that mean? Uh. uh that's not a play. That's a it's a. bow and arrow. Ah, typical Travis Kelce. Kansas City Chiefs celebration. Then we. have. Chris Jones on Twitter, we are so back.
A lot of people pumped up. A lot of. people pumped up. >> Man, I'm just as excited to be joining. forces with those two guys, man. Um and I think we all kind of had talks. at the end of the season. Um like I. said, I was always pretty optimistic. that I was coming back. There a lot of. people in the building knew that but. wanted to kind of give it some time and. and refocus it and uh and let the let. the Chiefs make some moves and figure. out a lot of things first uh to make us. an all around better team. Uh but then, you know, we kind of talked about some. of these things as the season ended.
Like, man, when how are we going to. never let it get to this [ __ ] point. again? And um and I think we're we're all three. especially us three right there. um be kind of being at the helm and. being here the longest uh and feeling. like we have the most uh. you know, uh leadership and and. accountability on the team in that. aspect. So, excited excited to get back. in the building with my guys and and and. get this thing cooking. Well, we just. mentioned Kenneth Walker on offense. Obviously, the offense has gotten. better, it would appear through the.
first short stint of free agency, but we. did we have lost some defensive players. Trent McDuffie signs a huge contract. >> a few guys signed some big contracts. Trent McDuffie went to the Rams. My guy. Jaylen Watson, paper cups, went to the. Rams. They got two unbelievable uh. corners and guys that are going to. [ __ ] come into work every single day. and I'm happy both of those guys got. paid and then on top of that, we got. Bryan Cook, B Cook over to Cincinnati. He's back home representing uh. Cincinnati in the hometown for the. Bengals. Uh also got paid and obviously,
you you're happy for these guys, but. man, you hate to see them go cuz of how. much you you love playing with them and. all the blood, sweat, and that you put. into to the off season and during the. season with them. So, it's uh it's it's. tough to see these guys go elsewhere, but um I'm happy these guys are making, you know, lifetime money. It's insane. because I was thinking about this the. other day. The the defense has really. been outstanding for the Chiefs the past. three seasons, right? Like what Spags. and that group has done has been. fantastic. And the backfield is.
completely. overhauled, right? Like you you I did. too with Trent McDuffie leaving. Now. Cooks, like last year Justin Reid. leaves, then your uh the year before. that uh oh my god, Titans. Oh, you're. talking about L'Jarius Sneed? >> Sneed, yep. So, it's. >> Sneed, man. Yeah, it's it's it's had a a. large transformation. Um it'll be interesting to see how they. retool that area. I mean, Spags is as. good as it gets. I don't know. You got. to make choices, right? And offensively, we needed some more firepower. They go. out and get Kenneth Walker.
Um so, it's going to have to have some. young guys step up. You ain't lying and. uh and you know I in Spags we trust, baby. He's uh he's unbelievable. I know. Dave Merritt, our DBs coach, is. unbelievable at getting the guys going. over there and understanding the system. He's been with him since he was in New. York and. he's been with Spags since he was in New. York. So, they're they're quite the duo. and we still got some guys in that room. that can play some ball now. I know they're going to have to step up. but. and become more of.
every down corner but I'm excited to see. it happen man. One being Zech. McPhearson. Well, there's some other. free agency news as well for the Eagles. We extended Jordan Davis 3 years 78. million including 65 million guaranteed. I thought this was an outstanding. extension. Jordan Davis really came on. this last year. Yeah, he was awesome. Very strong. He had an outstanding. season. Was in the best shape of his. career. I'm just so happy for this guy. >> like a great [ __ ] dude man. He's an. awesome dude but he's matured so much.
He came in with this youthful just like. he's a giant kid man and he still has. that enthusiasm and nature to him like. he is a big kid but now he's grown into. it, right? And he's he's accountable. He. He plays and practices hard. He does. everything right and you always love. whenever guys like that get rewarded. So, Hell yeah. Congratulations Jordan. Davis. That is life-changing money quite. literally. Unreal. Eagles, we did lose. unfortunately Jaylon Phillips to the.
Panthers. Signed a 4-year 120 million. contract with 80 guaranteed. God damn. And then what? Dude, the numbers this. year have been astronomical in free. agency. So, we're going to talk about a couple of. times cuz there's some other crazy. numbers I also want to bring up. I think. that there's a reason these numbers are. getting to the level they are. One. because they're really good players but. I think people underestimate how much. the salary cap is going to continue to. go up in the NFL. Let's talk about we.
also lost one of the exciting whites we. are now down to the exciting white on. defense. Reed Blankenship has signed. with the Houston Texans on a 3-year. 24.75. million dollar deal. Congratulations to. Reed. Awesome teammate and was a big. part of our success since he was with. the Philadelphia Eagles for 4 years. Congratulations. And here's some of. these other numbers. Centers are getting. [ __ ] paid. Chargers signed Tyler. Biadasz 3 years 30. Bills signed Connor. McGovern to a 4 year 52 million dollar. deal. But the big one everybody's. talking about is Tyler Linderbaum. 3.
years 81 million. This dude's making. over 25 million a year at the center. position. I don't think people realize. how [ __ ] crazy high that is. He's. just jumped 10 million dollars. The. market was at what? 16, 17? I think. actually I think Reed's. Creed got up to 18, right? >> So when I left the the year Yeah. before. Creed signed his deal at 18, I was. making the most on a per year basis 15. >> at four It was 14 and a half. I had I.
had I had upside to get to 15, I think. >> We're We're a half glass full kind of. family, Jason. There you go. There you. go. Um and even that was pretty high. And I think what is. Creed reset the market at 18 and then. Tyler Linderbaum in just 1 year has. reset that by 9 million dollars. And. one, Tyler Linderbaum's incredible. He. fits the scheme perfectly. Like they're. going to run that Kubiak system down. there. And in order to run that system, having a center that is really really. good makes outside zone systems go. Like. you need that. Like you go back to the.
Denver Broncos with Mike Shanahan, you. have Tom Nalen. Like if you have a guy. at the pivot position that can reach a. nose guard and get to the second level, it makes a big difference in that run. game. But. beside that, all of these numbers that. have been released this year have been. very high. And I think it's a clear. indicator the NFL salary cap is going to. continue to go up. These teams are. banking on the salary cap rising each. and every year. They know the media. contracts are being negotiated right now. between the NFL and all of these uh. media companies. And it's the biggest.
thing that any of these networks can. afford. >> Over the past 2 years it's gone up 40. mil. just these past 2 years. Last year I. think it went up 30, this year it went. up 22. But what I'm saying is most of. the money that dictates the salary cap. are the media contracts. 100%. It's gone. up 40 million the last couple years or. went up 40 million last year. What was. it this year you said? 20 something? So yeah, last year was like 30. something, this year is 22. Yeah, so it did that without redoing the.
media contracts. That's just in revenue. going up across the league. What's going to drastically change it is. the NBA redid their media contracts a. few years ago without the revenue really. going up. Like the the the the. viewership and everything stayed. stagnant, but these networks need sports. to survive. So they they spent huge on. the NBA media contracts. I really do. believe that this is NFL teams knowing. these media contracts for that they're. coming and renegotiating right now are.
going to be astronomically higher than. they are right now. I think we're going. to start seeing absurd number I mean. these are already crazy. >> My god, Duffy is getting 30 a year. You. look 4, 5 years down the line. It's you're going to start seeing close. to I wouldn't be surprised by in the. next 10 years you see a quarterback. getting like a billion dollar contract. I'm not I'm not messing with you. Because look at what Pat signed. Pat. signed a 500 million dollar deal, right? Basically. >> I think it was just under five. I think. you're right. I think it was a a little. bit over five actually. Within 10 years.
the media contracts are all going to. double. Now it's going to be a long-term deal. >> His was a 10-year deal, yeah. You're. going to see quarterbacks making close. to 100 million dollars a year, I bet. It. is crazy what these media contracts are. going to. The networks have to have the. sport because the NFL rules all of the. viewership numbers. It's what all the marketers want. It's. how these networks are surviving right. now. They're going to get desperate to have. this content. Fox, CBS, they're all. freaking competing against each other. They know these numbers are going to be.
ridiculous in 4, 5 years. And they're starting to try and. renegotiate them early. So, it might. even happen earlier. I don't know, man. I think this is a clear sign as any that. all of these teams know the salary cap. is going to be outrageous. in 4-5 years. And that's all we've got. for the. this week in NFL free agency. That's been the new news, Jason. We We. got out of the house and hit TGL, man. Yeah, baby. Yeah. How [ __ ] awesome. was that? Well, you Yeah, you had quite.
a blast. You were there what? 3 days in. a row? 3 days. Sunday, Monday, Tuesday. Yep. >> And to be honest, I'm not going to lie. I thought it was fascinating. The stuff. that you were doing where you were going. underneath, you were showing the lockers. with the players have at their disposal. out there. Also, the technology that. goes into all this stuff, the recovery, the. workout rooms and everything. It is a fascinating environment over. there. And that's exactly what they. brought me over to do. I think a lot of. times watching, you know, on TV, you. don't realize the technological like.
kind of thing. >> I'm telling you right now, I was blown away in person seeing that. place in person. Like let alone, you. don't understand what you're what you're. about to say, but seeing that place in. person and being in the arena is a night. and day uh difference than being in. watching on TV. For sure. On TV, it. doesn't I mean, it looks good, but when. you're there in person, you really get. an accurate representation for the scale. of it. I mean, it's an enormous. facility. That screen is gigantic. It's. huge. >> is huge and it moves and changes and the.
technology and you know, the innovation. put into that place is just state of the. art. And. I had an opportunity to go down there uh. and show that off. And I just First of. all, I was excited to see it cuz the. whole golf world has been talking about. this facility down there. And and so. far, so I'm like, dude, I I would love. to go check it out. And got the chance. to see how the green works going. underneath that. Uh got a chance to hit. on the simulator and got a chance to. watch some of the best golfers in the. world hit in front of a grandstand full.
of people. I mean, it was it was sick. >> that ticket every day of the week. 100%. >> honestly, I will buy that ticket to see. my guy. Min Woo absolutely ripping the [ __ ]. ball. Dude, I got a nice little chipping. lesson from Min Woo. Yeah, what did he. tell you cuz you actually look like you. actually kind of took something out of. that. Yeah. >> So, I I feel like when I'm chipping a. lot of times I try to like take my hands. out of it as much as I can and just make. it like a pendulum almost like you're. putting type thing.
And he was like, "Dude, you're too It's. making you too stiff. You got to be more. like you got to have a little bit of. release. It's not like a full swing, but. it's got to be more fluid." So, he was. giving me some great advice. I was like. taking it with one hand and kind of. swinging it. Then he was just kind of. getting me to release the club still. even when I'm chipping and. right away you can see how much more. feel. When my hands aren't involved at. all, I it's hard for me to gauge. the feel of hitting the ball. The moment. for whatever reason when I start to.
incorporate my wrist just a little bit, I feel like I can gauge speed better. chipping and really putting, too. Like. it's there's something about my hands. being involved that I have a better. feel. So, it was great. I would I would I would. love to take more lessons from you, Min. Woo. I don't know if you got time. I. know you're. busy winning all sorts of championships. and what not. >> was top he was top 10 over at Arnie's. place this week or at least. >> There we go. >> last I looked he was. Can I start. putting some money down on Min Woo? And then Tom Kim hitting the hole-in-one. to win.
and claw their way back from a major. deficit. >> TK. and make the playoffs was pretty. freaking epic. >> Dude, it was so [ __ ] lit in that. goddamn arena when he made that, dude. It was so fun, man. Before we were. getting ready to do that show that day, they're like, "Hey Jason, we're thinking. about putting you back up in the lift. for those holes." And I'm like, "Dude, guys, I I I'm happy we did the lifting, but honestly it was terrifying. I don't. want to go back up there. >> That was a one-and-done thing right. there. >> And they said, okay, what if we do some. fun bit where like, hey, you've had a.
long week, we're going to show off the. cold tub, you get in the cold tub to ice. down your legs and recover from a long. week of TGL. I'm like, oh yeah, that. sounds good. So, when that happened, I'm. in the locker room in my bathing suit. about to do a cool bit thing. Trav. didn't even get to see it in person. Damn it. >> Right? I just hear the whole place erupt, and. I'm like, dude, what just happened? And. we pull it up on the like phone, and we. see that Kim hit a hole in one. And. they're like, all right, we're about to. cut to the cold plunge thing at the next. break. I'm like, there's no way THEY'RE. GOING TO COME IN HERE AND DO IT HERE.
>> [laughter]. >> THEY'RE MORONS TO GET IN THE COLD. THERE'S SO MUCH [ __ ] happening out. there. >> Keep it on the guys. Keep it on the. guys. Keep it on the guys. >> But uh the lead producer Jeff gave me a. good ribbing. He's like, yeah, we I bet. you would have liked to have been in the. lift when that happened as opposed to in. the locker room. I'm like, yeah, you're. probably right. It was an epic week. Uh got to, you know, talk to Tiger Woods. It was just It was. so cool uh being down there talking with. Homa and and Min Woo. >> Max. Max is such a good dude. He was.
enjoying himself after that win. >> No doubt. No doubt. Um so, it was it was. a great week. And we got to play golf. together. I got to see you, Trav. Uh it was just it it was. >> [snorts]. >> a very fun 3 days, especially in Florida. out of the bitter snow that we had that. week in Philadelphia. So, [snorts] yeah. >> I'm saying it right now, we got to do a. live event. We got to do it, dude. We. got to do it, man. >> you talking about at TGL? We have to we. I if they let us if they let us around. that much technology.
>> [laughter]. >> And now, I think we could fill this I. think we could fill the seats, man. I. think it's uh it's such a cool. atmosphere. I think there's a way we. could we could have some fun with it. Bring it cuz everybody [ __ ] golfs, man. And don't get me wrong, we're no professionals. But. yeah, but it's it's it's fun to compete. uh and it's fun to [ __ ] be on a live. stage like that in such a unique. atmosphere. And I think I think we could. we could put something together and get. some things brewing. just in the NFL world, let alone if we.
start crossing leagues and bringing. other guys into it. >> Well, I I do got to ask you. You You saw. my golf game. uh for 3 days basically, 2 days. Are you. getting nervous about our Tahoe? No. [laughter]. What? I thought I played pretty good. I. thought I played pretty good. You are. playing pretty good. That doesn't mean. you're going to get in the positives. All right, Trev. Dude, >> [clears throat]. >> 30 you're not 30 strokes better than. what you were. I don't need to be 30. strokes. You're right, he's not 30.
strokes. I'm sorry. Yeah. You're not. You're not You're not not. If you break 80, you'll you're going to. be in the positive in Tahoe. You You think you're breaking 80? I think I'm going to be able to break. 80, yeah. I do. All I got to do is fix up the short. game. I got it. Get rid of that [ __ ]. putter, dude. You get rid of that putter. I might start shaking in my boots. You. get rid of that putter I I might start. shaking in my boots. I'm doing it with. that freaking peanut putter, whatever. you want to call it. That bull's eye is.
staying in the bag. You don't even know. that bull's eye. You don't You don't even know where to. hit it on the club to hit it. consistently. Yes, I do. Yes, I do. I just miss it sometimes. I know where. to hit it. I just don't hit it where I'm. trying to hit it sometimes. It's a small Aim small, miss small type. thing. It's a small sweet spot. You know. what? It's going to be fine. It's going. to be fine. There is no. chance you're breaking 80 with that. putter. All right, we'll we shall see. I have never been more confident. Just. let me put it Let me say that.
>> [laughter]. >> To be fair, breaking 80 one day isn't going to get. you into the positives. Yes, it is. Well, it will for a day. I mean, if you. do it all 3 days, you'll be in the. positive. But, yeah, breaking 80 by that. Stableford. uh scoring will probably be in the po-. will be in the positive. For sure. Cuz. if you're breaking 80, you're only. getting No, no, no. I hear you. But, what you got to do it 3 days in a row. Oh, that's the thing. Yeah, you would. have to break 80 all 3 days to be in the. positive. But, you can do it without. breaking 80, too. Really, if you break.
as long as you eliminate doubles, you. can be in the positive. fairly easily in the Stableford scoring. I don't know, man. Cuz a par is a point. >> Well, I guess yeah. And and yeah, I. guess. bogey's nothing. It's the doubles. The doubles are the. ones. Yeah. >> And the things that get me doubles are. the drives, which I think you'll agree, my drive was on point this week. I got that thing figured out with that. blue shaft. I was I was driving. [laughter]. I was up there [ __ ] living it. Counts. It counts. Yeah, it does. It.
definitely does. Um all right. Well, that does it for new news. Shout-out to. everybody at TGL for making that. absolutely epic. And shout-out to all. the NFL teams making moves in the off. season. New news brought to you by. American Express. Shout-out to American. Express. >> All right. Let's keep this thing moving. before we get to Conan. Night did you. percenters? It's March. And you know. what that means. We are officially. running it back with the New Heights. Reese's March Madness bracket challenge. >> That's right. So, we need all you. [snorts] guys to enter and give your.
best bracket. Jason, have you been. watching any any basketball? I have not. As typical, I am knee-deep in football. stuff all for the most of the basketball. season. So, I just don't see a lot of. college basketball. I would love to. offer my expertise though on who to. pick. So, look for that. Which is usually based on height or. asking I might ask ask expert this year. I might not even I might just go. completely off of somebody else's. opinions. Okay. All right. I got.
somebody that I know that knows a lot. about women's basketball. Ooh. Who do you know? Not saying any names. Not saying any names. Ooh, you're scared. to tell us. He's He's He's lying. I just. don't want to put him on the spot. Don't. want to put him on the spot. All right. Well, I watched a. quite a bit of men's basketball. and I know that Cincinnati is on the. bubble right now. Come on, Bearcats. >> We shall see. I know Miami of Ohio is. undefeated. >> Mhm. And that's about as far as I could. tell Jason if you're going to cheat and.
ask people for opinions. So, Wait, that's a cheating? That's cheating? Doing research is cheating? Yes. Do your. own [ __ ] research. Cite your [ __ ]. sources if you're if you're not going to. [ __ ] tell us your source. >> you. I'll tell you. I'll tell you. I will. I will tell you. >> [laughter]. >> my sources. Jake won the bracket. challenge last year. >> [laughter]. >> Wait a second. Wait a second. And yeah, Jake won it last year, but no.
chance he wins it this year. Zero. Men's. and women's brackets open on Selection. Sunday, March 15th. Next week we will. make our Final Four picks and share the. links to. participate in our bracket challenge. So, this year the winners will get a. swag bag with signed New Heights merch. and Reese's cups. Ooh. You think we ran out of gold cups, Jason? >> We can get some more. Well, I mean they. can make more of them. We can get a gold. cup. I think they at least got to get.
another gold cup. Yeah, we can get more. gold cups. Yeah, get some more gold. cups. I don't know. I still don't have a. gold cup, so that Why don't we get a few. of those? All right, I will get you a. gold cup. I would love Can I get it. embroidered? Travis, I'll pay for it right from the. New Heights account. >> [laughter]. >> I'll put both of our names. Uh yeah, we can definitely we can do it. We can do that. We can get you a cup. We. can get the winner of this a cup. Those. cups are expensive. They do cost over. $10,000. It is gold plated. It is. >> Oh, [ __ ]. It's a big deal. It's a big deal. And. it's a fun thing to take to a party.
uh and chuck beers out of, so. >> I've also used it as a casino chips cup. You put your kids chips in that cup. It. is a good luck I have done very well at. the casino with my gold cup. There's no. question. There you go. All right. Now, once again, thank you to our friends at. Reese's for teaming up for this March. Madness bracket challenge. May the best. 92% or win. Let's get to our. conversation with Conan O'Brien, ladies. and gentlemen. Thanks to our PRESENTING SPONSOR, HILL'S. PET NUTRITION. Life moves fast. You're. up early and you're grinding through the.
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We're rolling. We're rolling. Guys, meet 6 ft 4 in. of [sighs and gasps] Yeah. 90 lb of PURE IRISH MAGIC. >> [laughter]. >> THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT. >> I wish I was there in person because I. would physically intimidate you both. >> [laughter]. >> I could I wouldn't be able to take it. You just wouldn't be able to. It's too. much. [laughter]. It's a lot of man right here talking to.
you guys, but uh. Ryan, control yourselves. How are you. both? Doing good. Dude, absolutely. fantastic, man. Thank you for the time. Thanks for having me on. You're. preparing for the Oscars. What is How. much of that team overlaps with like. what you do with Team Coco and like late. night? Like is it completely separate? >> No, there's a lot of overlap. Uh a lot. of these are writers that I've used. before. They worked with me for years. I. mean, I've been at this. forever. I have all my favorite writers. come in for this, and we just get a room.
going. Uh it it's not probably unlike. your world, where it's all about. preparation. So, >> Sure. um. So, we get people together, and we start. a couple of months ago, and we just. start working. Uh and we have a room that goes all the. time, and I drop in and out of it. I. usually just WASTE THEIR TIME. >> [laughter]. >> I DO ALL THIS [ __ ] I I get them.
laughing, but it's not in any way. productive for the audience. >> Vibe check. You always get a vibe check. Exactly. That's what it is. It's a lot. of vibe check. So, that's just fun. That's That part uh is probably my. favorite part. The two things I miss the. most when I'm not working on a project. like this or doing a late-night show is. the band and the writers. You're so in. sync with the band, specifically the. drummer. I mean, the intros. to the late night. are some of my favorite.
like showman work of all time. I mean, the hips with the high hats. Yeah. Are. you kidding me? The The The The coat. tails to the Yes. Hip checks. >> Yes. The nipple The nipple twisting. Uh. yeah. [laughter]. You know, this was my version of an end. zone dance, you know? Like, that was my. uh I I always, you know, was thinking if I ever did somehow.
accidentally get thrown into a game and. managed to catch uh a football in the. end zone, it would be the string dance. and then the nipples and then I'd. probably be They'd probably the nipples. would get me tossed, probably, right? [laughter]. I don't think you're allowed to do that. >> It probably gets you a little fine. It'd. be at least 15 yd. All right. Well, uh. you know, it's maybe worth it. Maybe. worth it. >> It is. Hey, if you get in that end zone, you can do whatever you want. >> Exactly. We're going to talk more about. this. We're going to do the intro real. quick, though, and cuz I know we got it. in the show with the all the Oscar prep.
and everything. So, Whatever you guys. want to do. Whatever you want to do. You're the man, dude. >> Here we go. ALL RIGHT. OUR GUEST TODAY IS A 6-FT-4. COMEDIAN, WRITER, AND FELLOW PODCASTER. OUT of Brookline, MASSACHUSETTS. HE. GRADUATED MAGNUM [screaming] [ __ ] LAUDE. FROM A SMALL STATE SCHOOL JUST OUTSIDE. OF BOSTON. HE IS A SIX-TIME EMMY WINNER, WINNER OF THE 2025 MARK TWAIN PRIZE of. for humor. You might know him from his time as the. host of the hit podcast Conan O'Brien. Needs a Friend or as THE HOST OF THE. EMMY AWARD-WINNING travel series Conan.
O'Brien Must Go OR FROM HIS 16-YEAR. STINT AS THE HOST of Late Night with. Conan O'Brien. He is the man that gave. the world COMEDY CLASSICS SUCH AS PIMP. BOT, TRIUMPH THE INSULT COMIC DOG, MASTURBATING BEAR, AND ANDY RICHTER. AND THIS SUNDAY, HE IS BACK FOR HIS. SECOND TIME HOSTING THE ACADEMY AWARDS. 92% IS PLEASE WELCOME THE LARGEST. IRISHMAN I KNOW NOW, CONAN O'BRIEN. MY GOD, I've been waiting for that. intro. Hey,
Jason, are you available to do my intro. for the Oscars? Are you a. >> [laughter]. >> Listen, be careful what you throw out there, Conan, before you get If you did that, first of all, it would be way too long. The Oscar people would be so pissed. The. band's playing. >> [laughter]. >> Kelce nation would be going crazy. There'd be a lot of people would be. tuning in to the Oscars [laughter] for. the first time. Hey, absolute honor to be here, and I do. want to stress if you saw me in person,
you'd have I'd have nothing but mad. respect from both of you because I am. [laughter] a physical. I am a specimen. I'm a physical. specimen. And a lot of people don't know. that because I act like such a fool. That hair is a golden red right now. That. that top piece is looking fantastic, dude. Isn't that beautiful? I have so. many wigs for every occasion. >> [laughter]. >> Don't you envy my wife? She sees this.
orange sherbet lying on the pillow next. to her. It's so thrilling. And also, um, everyone here in my world, Team Coco, is. so excited that I'm doing this that I've. got uh fans sitting in right now, uh. huge Chiefs fans, Tanisha and Buddy. Just jump over here. Can you see them? JUMP OVER. COME ON OVER HERE. They're I. mean, these are fanatics. And get in. here. Get in close, right around me. THERE THEY ARE. >> [laughter]. >> OH, CHECK OUT THE JERSEY.
>> [screaming]. >> ALL THEY DO IS TALK ABOUT the damn. Chiefs. And by the way, What are you. talking about, baby? no offense, I'm a. Patriots guy, born and raised Oh, yeah. Had a feeling. Yeah, sorry about that. Not a terrible. situation to be in as a Patriots fan. Not a terrible situation to be in. And. then, um you know, I wanted to uh get. some Eagles fans in here, but they're. too violent. They're [laughter] just you. know. You got to go down to the courthouse to. find some of those. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
yeah. If we had Eagles fans in here, they would be tearing out the equipment. and throwing it at me. [laughter]. I'm terrified of an Eagles fan. Much. respect, but they frighten me. They're. so intense. >> [laughter]. >> Uh but guys, it's a huge treat. Thanks. for having me on. I appreciate it. >> The treat is all ours. I mean, I can't. tell you how much we watched you all. growing up and we've followed I mean, we. I was I played hockey growing up and we. would go and have sleepovers when we. were younger and we're like I mean, middle middle school at this time. And. we would stay up play video games and. purposely stay up just to watch Late. Night with Conan O'Brien.
>> Every time. And see the Walker, Texas. Ranger lever. Well, the Walker, Texas. Ranger lever was one of my favorite. things ever. >> [laughter]. >> I would ever. And it's one of the things. I'm most happy about, and then they made. us stop doing it because the because. they said that we're playing all these. clips and there's actors in those clips. and they said to me, you know, the. actors are starting to notice you're. playing these clips and you're not. paying them and they're going to come. after you. Boo. And so we got to cut it. down. And I was so I went into a.
depression. Yeah. And then I said to my producer, I want. it to end to my lawyer, I want to take. this to trial. And they're like, "What are you talking. about?" And I said, "I want to show. [laughter] you. These people These actors are are going. to go crazy." And I said, "No, I want to. go to trial and show the clips and then. say, 'Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, THAT IS NOT ACTING.'". >> [laughter]. >> AND THEY SAID, "YOU ARE NOT [laughter]. GOING TO DO THAT. THAT is not happening.
Shut up.". So, that had to go away, but. >> [laughter]. >> You would have won right there. This is. before internet, so I didn't know. we had uh when the show first started, all we had was like reviews to go off. of, and the reviews were. were written by people my age or older, and they didn't under- they just didn't. like what I was doing. And no one told. me that, "No, there's all these.
14-year-olds out there who are staying. up and watching it, and they're like. building a religion around it." And so, I always wish, "Well, why couldn't, you. know, uh. Travis and Jason have got a hold of me. back then and said, 'Hey, MAN, WE LOVE. >> [laughter]. >> YOU'RE CROSSING IT. THERE WAS NO There. was no way, and I Now I meet all these. comics who are huge stars now who are. like, "Oh, no, I grew up watching your. stuff." And I thought, "Well, we didn't. know. No one told us." We didn't have. any idea, so It was a kind of a rough.
start, no? Like the first episode you. came in with high expectations off of. SNL and like like everybody was like, "Man, Conan O'Brien is hilarious. He's. going to kill it." And the only reason I. know this is because I tried my hand at. a late night show this year. One of the. hardest things I've ever done, but I had. uh You had a bunch of my writers. >> All of them. All of them. They were all. former Late Night with Conan O'Brien. Uh. Jon Glaser, Tammy's uh Seger, Andy. Blitz, and uh Kevin Dorff. All those. They were all writing on the show. It. was so hard and daunting. And I They.
knew what a fan I was of your stuff, and. they said like it wasn't easy for Conan. when he just got started. It was it it. took him a while to like really get into. it and everything. So I don't know. I. don't know why I'm bringing this up now, but yeah, go ahead. >> It's like anything else where. again, I think there are probably some. analogies to your guys profession where, you know, you come up, you think about. comedy all the time, you're obsessed. with it, and then finally you get your. show, but I was 29 when I auditioned. I. had never done anything on television.
And so. you know, it was one of those situations. where I was thrown in, uh, you know, as a rookie, and it was. I'm just getting sacked left and right. It's kind of a disaster. We were doing. the kind of comedy that I wanted to do, which was very strange and stuff that I. really believed in and that my head. writer, Robert Smigel, really believed. in. So we knew we were doing what we wanted. to do, but I had to learn a lot. I had. to kind of learn how to.
you know, in your world it would be like. see the field and figure out how it all. comes together and gels. And the only situation was you're just. out there alone. You're one of just a. few late-night hosts. This is back when. there weren't any, and, uh, I mean, there were very few. And so. >> Yeah. there's a lot of focus. There's an. incredible amount of focus. So yeah, we. barely survived that first year and a. half, 2 years. I always thought I was. going to get canceled and, um, but then it started to gel.
And then it started to click, but I I. think I I mean, I started in September. of '93, and I don't think it really. started to. click with Americans until like. '96. It makes sense too, looking back at. it though, because a lot of the stuff. ended up you're building like this. atmosphere within the show, right? Like. there's like so many pieces and. characters and bits and things that take. time to really take foot for like fans. watching, but once they're in, it's like.
this stuff is gold, man. It is. hilarious, and the fans love it, and I. feel more like and maybe I'm wrong on. this, but it feels like you almost more. than any of the other late-night show. hosts, there's like a level of fandom. that is. like to a die-hard nature. Like people. absolutely love Conan O'Brien with like. an infatuation. >> He's so spot-on. And I've always. actually wondered why why haven't you. done more acting? >> Oh, well. >> [laughter]. >> I've always I've always in my mind like,
"Man, he's he's so good he he could do. all of it. He's got the full gamut." But. I I feel like I feel like you haven't. like. I don't know. Am I Am I Am I off on. that? No, no, you're not off. You're off. about a lot of things, but. >> [laughter]. >> I am I am off. This is, you know, I. mean, Travis, so you're so off on just. about everything, but um and and I'm. getting this from Jason. Um. but. >> [laughter]. >> he's got a lot of complaints. Um no, you're absolutely right. You know,
here's the problem. I can. I just love what I do so much that the. idea of me being in like a buddy cop. movie. I if it's comedy, I would be excited to. do it. Um and I did a serious acting. role this year with Rose Byrne for this. movie If I Had Legs, I'd Kick You, which. did really you know, was it's she's. nominated for an Oscar, and that was. exciting to try. But. I don't think I have it in me. to be in a real acting scene, meaning.
Okay. >> if if I was in a scene and my job was to. tell a woman how much I loved her and. then start crying, I would just be doing. bits the whole time and jokes, and. they'd [laughter] fire me right away. You know, like I couldn't You know what. I mean? If If my job was to say, "I. loved you. I loved YOU SO MUCH. I I THINK I WOULD I MEAN PEOPLE IN the. audiences would just be laughing and. then I'd probably look at the camera and. go, "Well, WHAT DO YOU WANT from me?".
You know, so. No, that makes that makes all the sense. in the world. She's grieving about her. father just dying and you're And I'm. like, "YOU'LL GET ANOTHER FATHER. WHAT'S. THE BIG DEAL? >> [laughter]. >> FATHERS ARE A DIME A DOZEN, YOU KNOW? UH. I'D DO SOME stupid bit. I'd ruin it. Guys, it's for the best. It's for the. best that I stay out of acting. You're. not staying out of the acting world. You. are hosting the Oscars for your second. time coming up this Sunday. Guys, I need. you. I will fly you in. You guys have to.
be backstage with me getting me psyched. up just before I go out. If you did. that, I'd go running out there with way. TOO MUCH ENERGY. >> [laughter]. >> AND IT'D HAVE SHOTS OF LIKE Timothy. Chalamet and, you know, these like. famous actors, Brad Pitt. We'd be like, "What is WRONG WITH HIM?". >> [laughter]. >> WE'RE GOING TO CHEW IT UP AND SPIT IT. OUT. [screaming]. WE'RE GOING TO [ __ ] KILL HIM. >> YEAH, and then doctors would rush in and.
and carry me away. That's right, Trav. We'll get him We'll get him some. pre-workout drinks, some smelling salts, creatine. He'll be juiced to the gills, Conan. If you give him all that, we're. going to you we're going to need to give. him a helmet, too. All those things, you're going to need to put a helmet on. if you're going to do that. That That. That concoction could get crazy. If we. did this, I would totally dis- the. Oscars would be a disaster and. afterwards word would get out. People. would be going like, "What happened? He. did it last year and it was good. What. happened?" Well, did we mention that. Travis and Jason Kelce.
>> [laughter]. >> were backstage with him. They gave him. some stuff to drink. They gave him a helmet. and [laughter] they yelled at him. That. might have had something to do with it. Then Conan went over and speared the. trombonist. IT WAS CRAZY. >> [laughter]. >> YEAH, JUST TAKE HIM OUT. JUST TAKE HIM. OUT. YEAH. ELECTRA, give the people what. they want to see, man. >> Sure, you got to. You got to. Well, have. you seen most of the movies that are up. for awards? How does it When you're. hosting, do you make a point to try and.
watch all of them and. >> Yeah, I really do try to see them all. Um and this was a great year. I mean, this was a year where there's big stars. in the films. There's a lot of great. movies. Um there's, you know, box office. hits. I mean, movies that did really. well. Uh so, I watched them all and I. thought this is a great crop of movies. Um so, it's a good year to host. I was. excited about it. >> You had a Kendrick Lamar joke last last. year that you bet one of your writers on. that whether it was going to work out or.
not. >> I didn't bet him. My producer did. My. one of my writers wrote a joke and um I. think it was I'm trying to think of it. what it was. It was like, well, it we're. halfway through the show and Kendrick. Lamar had He had just done the Super. Bowl halftime show. Yep. >> And um and who was he feuding with at. the. >> Drake. It was Drake, that's right. It. was Drake. >> Drake. And so, uh you know, these feuds. I try and keep up with them. Um. >> [laughter]. >> Uh but. >> Rapper. the rapper. >> Yeah, I said, hey, we're halfway through.
the show, which means it's time for. Kendrick Lamar. to. >> [laughter]. >> call Drake a pedophile. And um. And. uh it destroyed. It destroyed and people. went crazy for it. But just before he. went out, my producer Jeff Ross was. like, that joke's going to bomb. No. one's going to get it. And I'm like, are. you kidding me? And so, he bet the. writer of the joke. And as I walked. backstage, I see my producer handing HIM. LIKE $100.
>> [laughter]. >> HE DID BETTER THAN I THOUGHT. YEAH, but. I was never in doubt about that one. Are. there any jokes you're worried about. this year? How How does How do you go. sussing out which ones make it and which. ones don't? >> Probably one of the best things to do, which I've been doing now for about 2. months, is I go to clubs and I show up. as a surprise and I go to far-flung. clubs, like really clubs that are way. out there. Chase, could you imagine just. sitting there and Conan walks out? What? Let me be the surprise. So cool. It's.
fun and you go to these places where, I. mean, sometimes it literally is like a. little comedy. uh club in the back of a bowling alley. in Covina and there's no like the. bathroom door is busted, so they say. just use the alley. So, I was [laughter]. in an alley in Covina pissing up against. a wall before I did my set and I. thought, I'm hosting [laughter]. I'm hosting the Oscars in like 5 weeks. and I'm pissing in an alley in Covina.
and I and I just thought like this is. amazing. I love this. This is what it. takes to be the best. Yeah, you've got. to go urinate in an alley if you want to. >> [laughter]. >> I'll be probably doing that just before. the Oscars. Minutes before I'll say, "Do. you guys have an alley?". What are you talking about? >> I'm superstitious. Yeah, I'm. superstitious. I need an alley right now. and I need 9 quarts of water. >> [laughter]. >> YOU GO OUT AND YOU TRY JOKES out and you. over time you get a sense of these ones.
seem to consistently do well. This one. doesn't seem to land right and it's just. a lot of again, something you guys can. relate to, prep. I mean, a lot of things in life. are. put in the work and. do the prep. I'm a big believer I I. always thought how much talent I have. isn't my business. I don't even know. It's very hard to know, like am I more. talented than that person or less.
talented than that person? I always. thought I can't control that. That's a. mystical thing that you can never really. know. What I can control is prep. I can. control prep and I can control hard work. and. be honest with yourself. When it didn't. go right, don't tell yourself it went. great. Be honest with yourself. So, those are the principles that I probably. think apply to not just your profession, my profession, but you can apply that. anywhere, you know? There's a lot I. can't control and um and if you do the.
prep. then you if the plan doesn't go right uh. then you you improvise, but you have a. freedom. Well, at least I did the prep, so now I feel free to okay, this this. didn't unfold the way I wanted it to. uh and this prop just broke or something. just went wrong in front of everybody. but now I can make something up. I can. scramble. And I think that again, same.
principles in my business as your. business. It's the same thing. Yeah, you're 100% right. And I I I think two. two of the things you have touched on. are like monikers that we use our whole. career like the. control what you control is something. that is so important in athletics and. really everything, right? So many people. get wound up in their head thinking. about what ifs and things that are. outside what they have control of. And. it's like, "Hey, if you just focus on. these things, this is actually what's. going to allow you to be successful." To. me, I felt like whenever I practice and. really put the time in, I just felt.
confident and. you you you're not as nervous. You don't. worry as much. You're just kind of out. there doing what you just did all week. preparing for. And. um it does free you up and trying new. things out, you know, you're going to. the clubs. We would try things out in. practice. You know, I go out there, "Hey, I'm going to try this technique. out today. Oh, I just got my ass kicked. Okay, let's throw that one away. We're. not going to try that one again." Well, I got my answer. Yeah. And there's also a thing. uh. that I think about a lot.
uh is muscle memory and you'd think um. you can apply that to anything. You can. apply muscle memory obviously to. athletics, which is just thousands and. thousands and thousands of reps. So, you're not thinking. when you, when you. catch the ball, you're not thinking when. you, you know, when you're centering up, you're not thinking about any of that. stuff because it's the muscle memory. It's the same thing that happens. in comedy and it's the same thing that.
happens, I'm sure, in every other. profession where, um, you have that and that can take over, so. you don't have to waste any brain power. thinking about that and it frees up. space to take advantage of, oh wait, this weird thing just happened. I'm. going to go left or I'm going to go. right. It's all the same thing. >> Travolta called that blacking out. He's. talked about that numerous times. >> [laughter]. >> Blacking out, but you do the work so. that you have those natural instincts. ready in your back pocket to play.
>> You know what I mean? >> Yeah. I think I think it's so. fascinating. We all have, uh, we all. have the different, like, the you were. talking about the the work you put in, the prep you put in. We all have that. different, like, world that is our prep. and I think that's where you really make. it unique and you make it you and to. hear that you're going to these kind of. one-off small town comedy spots, that is. so cool to know that you use those to be. on literally the biggest stage that. anybody could ever be on.
>> Yeah, the other thing that's great about. it is, um, I get a lot of energy from being around, I mean, sometimes these are, you know, people in their 20s are hanging out. trying out their sets there and they. have, um, it's tough to make a living in stand-up. right now because the business structure. of it all has changed, so a lot of these. people that I'm hanging out with before. I go up or after I go up, have two other. jobs. And.
you see that I like anything that. reminds me that the scale of things can. change. You know, you can. you can. you can be in the Super Bowl or you can. be hosting the Oscars. But fundamentally, it's not different. from you. playing in the street, you know, in front of your house. It. There is something that the two are. connected. And to act like there's not a. connection between the two, I think is.
silly because there is. There's a real. fundamental connection and. I think sometimes people forget. They. think, "Well, you know, Super Bowl, that's just going to be a whole new. thing." And you think, "Well, actually, fundamentally, it's the same thing. We've added all these layers of, you. know, money and, you know, prestige and. commercials and, you know, there's going. to be rockets firing in the air and. there's a huge halftime show." But. fundamentally, it's the same thing. And.
that's what I think about is when I go. out there. in a couple of days, it's going to be. the same. thing that I've been trying to do in one. way or another since I was 14 years old. It's really not that different. It's. just now I've got makeup. >> [laughter]. >> Like a really nice touch screen. Exactly. that. We'll see, you know, but yeah. You. said you're trying some of these jokes. out in these comedy clubs. Would you try.
some of them out with us right now? I. absolutely will not. I'm too. superstitious. Absolutely will not. And I And I don't. trust you. I'm going to be honest with. you, I don't trust you. That's fair. That is very fair. You guys are You have. a great reputation. You seem like good. guys. You know, you're wholesome Ohio boys, but I don't I think you're going to leak. these, you're going to [ __ ] me over, [laughter]. and you're going to you're going to. laugh, and then you're going to. high-five each other. That's what's. going to happen. >> That's right.
That's right. You see right through us, Conan. All right. Last Oscar's question, will the Dune sandstorm be making. another appearance? >> You know, I I got to change it up, and. this culture moves so quickly that. the thing that you could joke about last. year, you know, this year if I made a. Dune joke, people would be like, "What's. Dune?" I mean, everyone has such short. attention spans now that they're. thinking about these movies that we're. talking about tonight, and if I talk.
about something that happened 6 weeks. ago, they don't know what I'm talking. about. So, yeah, there'll be no Dune. this year. Well, let's move on to. something we've really been wanting to. ask you since we've. found out that we were going to have the. pleasure having you in front of us. Kind. of already touched a little bit on this, but as someone that's done 4,380. episodes of late-night TV, and now a. fellow podcaster, what is what's the. golden nugget to becoming a better. interviewer? Okay. I do have a strong opinion about this,
which is [snorts]. >> Okay. Yes. Um. It's not a good one, but it's a strong. opinion. No, I [laughter]. I think. that you can do kind of a Jedi mind. trick on yourself. And I I do this. Um. If you're talk If you're interviewing a. lot of people, and over the years, I've been interviewing like three people. a night, five nights a week, you know, 40 46.
weeks a year. I mean, it's just a total. grind. And there'd be people that would come on. the show that I. Yeah. To be honest with you, because you're doing such a volume. business, I wasn't. naturally that interested in that. person. >> That would happen. It's just there's no. way around it. And what I would do is I. would spend some time thinking about. that person and try to find the thing. about either themselves or what they do. that was interesting to me.
And if you think about it, you can. always find that thing. So, you could at. first glance have a guest. and you're thinking, uh you know, we're. talking to. you know, this guy is the was this. former Treasury Secretary. Uh why do I. want to talk to the former Treasury. Secretary? And then, uh. but then if you look at it, you find out. oh, uh he's he loves restoring 1967. Chryslers. And then you're like, oh,
that's kind of cool. Or he uh he likes. Taekwondo. Wait a minute, that's. interesting. If you think about someone. and read a little bit about them, you'll. find things that's your way into that. person. And I think humans listening to any. interview, podcast, late night, they can tell when you're really. interested. Mhm. And you So, all it is. is. finding what's the thing that interests. you about that person. And the second. part is listening. Because believe it or.
not, there are a lot of interviewers out. there who don't listen. They just they. have their question they want to ask, but they're not really listening. And if you're listening, you'll hear the. person say something like, you know, there was that summer that I worked in a. in a coal mine. And you'd be like, wait. a minute, what? You worked in a coal. mine? What's that all about? >> [laughter]. >> And if you're not listening, you let the. you breeze right past that and you you. know, you lose this golden thing. So, those are the tricks. Yeah. I mean, that. makes all the sense in the world. By the.
way, I hear kids in the background. I. hear children. >> That's mine. Yeah, my I I do this in my. basement. No, no, that's. >> [laughter]. >> Big production. Big production. If you. want, uh Jason, I will totally scream at. them for you. >> [laughter]. >> God, which one which which which one's. making noise? The which one's making. noise? >> [laughter]. >> Conan wants to scream at THEM REAL. QUICK.
>> [laughter]. >> I'M GETTING A NO FROM MY WIFE. I'M. GETTING A YEAH, that's okay. [laughter]. I respect her. I respect her. Is that. no? You know what? It's for the best. because your children would be, uh, scarred for life. They'd say, "Why did. that orange-haired woman yell AT US?". AND [laughter]. THAT LADY WAS SO MEAN. >> [laughter]. >> THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSOR, ALLSTATE. >> Checking Allstate first could save you.
hundreds on car insurance. That's smart. >> Not checking, uh, the clocks are reset. after daylight savings time? Rookie. move. To be fair, I was only late. because I have no idea what time zone. I'm in. That's why checking is smart. So, check Allstate first for a quote. that could save you hundreds. You're in. good hands with Allstate. Potential. savings vary, subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate. North American Insurance Company and. affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.
Thank you to our partner, Liquid I.V. Spring is here and, uh, you know what. that means? Spring break travel. Who. doesn't love a good spring break travel? We often times would find ourselves. growing up going down to Florida where. our grandmother lived. Our, uh, uncle. lived down in Marco Island and then we'd. try and time it up in a little Disney. World action. It was the highlight. growing up as a kid. Um, and then I got. into high school and we would go every. spring break, uh, to tour as a jazz. ensemble where I forgot to mention to.
Conan O'Brien that I actually played at. Brookline High School. I competed in. jazz against his alma mater. Anyways, uh. spring break is perhaps the best time of. year for kids and adults who have kids. cuz you get to enjoy some incredible. family memories. All right, you guys. travel bits, we know how important. staying hydrated is on the go. Whether. you're jet-setting to escape somewhere. warm for a few days or taking the kids. to go see the family, long travel days.
take a toll on your body and especially. your hydration. That's why Liquid IV is. a must-have in your carry-on bag. Just. tear one open, pour it into your water. bottle, and you're good to go. With an optimized ratio of electrolytes, essential vitamins, and clinically. tested nutrients, Liquid IV turns. ordinary water into extraordinary. hydration that helps you rehydrate more. than water alone. Plus, there's tons of. hydration multiplier flavors to choose. from like cotton candy, popsicle, firecracker, or. my favorite, pina colada. Or you can try.
sugar-free options with flavors like. white peach, lemon lime, rainbow. sherbet, and more. Wherever you're. heading this spring, travel with. on-the-go hydration from Liquid IV. Tear, pour, live more. Head to. liquidiv.com and get 20% off your first. order with the code newheights at. checkout. That interview advice is great cuz I I. it is often that you find yourself like. you're you get caught in the questions. and you're not listening. And that's. what it's like it doesn't it doesn't. feel like a conversation. It doesn't. feel like it's going anywhere. The other. thing we find that we're often doing is.
we're we're just doing like a bit of. that Chris Farley SNL thing. Do you. remember? Remember? That was great, right? Like. Yes, man, I love that sketch. Uh I love. when he would do that. Did you guys You. guys are huge Farley fans. Is that. correct? >> Oh, man. We are. Yeah, so I was there. um. the day he came in for his interview. to He had to go talk to Lorne Michaels. about uh you know, before you get hired,
you have to have this one last interview. with Lorne Michaels and Lorne had this. office that was right above the studio. We would all write up on the 17th floor, but then the studio was on the 8th floor. and on the 9th floor there's this small. office that Lorne had. And he would you. know, he'd make people wait a long time. And I kept noticing this guy sitting. you know, he was a real young Chris. Farley and he was sitting on this couch. wearing like a a blue like a blue blazer.
and a tie and he's being so Chris, he. was just waiting for his big shot to. talk to Lorne and I'm a writer there and. I noticed after a while like this poor. guy's been waiting a long time and. someone said, "Oh, that's that's Chris. He's probably going to be a cast member, but he has to have his interview with. Lorne." So, I told Chris, "Let's take a. walk, buddy." I'm Conan. He's like, "Oh, hey, hey, how are you?" Oh, you know, you know, bowing. >> [laughter]. >> and like, "Oh, oh." And I'm like, "Hey, let's take a walk. I'll show you. around." So, I walked him around the. studio on eight. And I was doing this.
bit where if a guy was raising, you. know, a boom mic, I would shout out like I was in charge. of him. And I would I would. I would [laughter] shout out like I was. the boss. But if he was already raising the boom. mic, I'd be like, "GET THAT BOOM MIC UP. LET'S GO. GET THAT BOOM MIC UP. >> [laughter]. >> GRAB IT NOW, CHARLIE." AND HIS NAME. WASN'T EVEN CHARLIE. I DIDN'T EVEN know. his name. I'd be like, "COME ON, CHARLIE. HIGHER WITH THE BOOM MIC." AND. Chris was laughing and then Chris. started doing it. And so, we walked. around just doing this bit for about 20.
minutes shouting at people to do the. thing they were already doing. And he ends up having his interview with. Lorne, which obviously went went well. Uh and then, um. you know, he was. just such. he was that guy. He would always. you meet people in comedy who are kind. of serious when they're not doing it and. then they turn it on. And I've always. really related to the people that do it. 24/7. and that was Chris. I mean Chris, you'd.
see him in the hallway and. you could like pretend to hit him in the. stomach and he would double over and. then he'd his go into a character and it. was that all the time. It's really. joyous. You just fed that to my bow to. my heart and my bones. We love Farley, man. We grew up on on on that and I can. only imagine how amazing it was to to. actually be around the guy even off. camera and everything. Yeah. Yeah. Wouldn't it make sense that you two. would click right away cuz I feel like.
both of you are very physical comedians, right? Like there's a lot of like body. motion and like. physicality to the humor. I guess that. probably does lend itself to like if. you're like that, you're probably like. that off air as well. Like it's probably. hard to turn that on, I would assume. I'm one of six kids and I grew up in. environment and we were all born like, you know, practically within months of. each other. >> [laughter]. >> Science. It's the Irish Catholic way. Irish sextuplets. Yeah, exactly. [laughter] And so.
there was a lot of physicality just. growing up. I mean, I have we have dogs. and cats and I just see them on the. floor rolling around. They're playing, but if you didn't know any better, it. looks like they're fighting, but they're. not. They're playing. They're like. soft mouth, but they're like kind of. biting each other and cuffing each other. and rolling around on the floor and. making noise. And that's how I grew up and I'm very. much still that way. I. I. I like to be for better or worse very.
physical around people and I'm. constantly. now that I'm no spring chicken, but for. years I would. I would I immediately want to do any. bit that involves me jumping through. something, you know, like a. >> [laughter]. >> fake glass or taking a fall or making a. leap. I just love that stuff. And now. I'm 62 years old and I still like doing. that stuff. And so I'll come up with an.
idea where I do that and these the. people, the professionals will say, "Well, no, we're going to have to get a. stunt guy." And I I I lose it. I say, "No. I The only reason I want to do this. is I want to jump through the window. I. want to get tackled. [laughter] I want. You know, that's the stuff. >> to go through this table. Yeah, I want. to go through this table and um you. know, uh. I'll figure out the rest later. Meaning, if something breaks, we'll figure it.
out. >> [laughter]. >> Nice. But that is very much the kind of. thing I've always uh liked a lot. And so. I don't seem to be adjusting for age. And that's probably going to go very. badly at some point, but. >> No, no, not if you just keep living. young. You're good. Okay, so the doctors. ARE WRONG. >> [laughter]. >> WE'LL GET YOU some Toradol. You'll be. fine. You'll be good. >> It's all precautionary. >> Jason, what is it called?
>> Toradol. It was a big They They used to. inject it and then there was a lawsuit. >> Well, you can still get the injection. So, you're saying that I qualify for an. injection of a drug that uh You're going. to go back to your 40s. >> We would be honored to host you to. Bill's Mafia, Buffalo, New York. We're. going to inject you with some Toradol. and we're going to send you through a. flaming table. I think you'd be. >> [laughter]. >> very excited for this. Guys, I'm not. kidding. I will promise you this right. now on the air. I'll meet you anywhere,
anytime. I want a professional doctor to. inject me with Toradol and then I will. jump through something. I promise you. This is not a bit. I'm here on record. I think that would be so much fun. Let's go. >> Yeah. And then uh my wife will take all. of you all of us to court, ME INCLUDED. >> [laughter]. >> THAT WOULD BE SO MUCH FUN TO DO THAT. THOUGH. I mean I'm giddy just thinking.
about it. This is going to happen. It's. going to happen. We're going to shoot. it. We're going to be video. It's going. to go viral and then you guys can come. visit me in the hospital. >> I'm just going to say the Chiefs do play. in Buffalo next year. >> [laughter]. >> We know we're on borrowed time here. We're going to do our last segment we. got to ask, all right? >> Are you kidding? I will spend I will. spend the week with you. I would rather. do this than any of the hospital stuff. >> [laughter]. >> Seriously. >> me back INTO THE ROOM WITH THEM. THIS IS. THE most fun I've had in a while and I'm.
I'm not. I'm just enjoying this. So I have I'm. very happy. All right. Of all the guests you've had on late. night or the pod, who is your favorite? There are different kinds of guests that. are great in different ways. But I think a. a guy who is a true artist. was uh Norm Macdonald. We we had a little $50 bet going on. ourselves if it was going to be Norm or. not. >> [laughter]. >> And if I mention Norm, I've got to say.
there's also I mean Will Ferrell when he. would come on completely in character um. and and you know, as a leprechaun in a. thong. I mean so it's not that there's. one winner, but the reason I mentioned. Norm is that nobody did what he did and. no one ever can again. I do think he was. uniquely able. he would come out and just tell these. stories that were total [ __ ] and you. knew from the get-go [laughter]. it was total [ __ ] and he'd be like,
you know, I'd say, "Norm, how's it. going?" I'd say, "Yeah, pretty good, Conan. I uh you know, I'm a I got a. farm." And I'd be thinking, he doesn't. have a [ __ ] farm. >> [laughter]. >> But I'd go, you know, cuz you're the. interviewer I'd be like, "Oh, you have a. Yeah, yeah, I got a I got a farm and. I got I got three daughters, Conan." And. I'd be thinking, "What?" And but I go, "Three daughters?" [laughter]. Yeah, yeah, "Each one. Each one prettier than the next." And. one day a a traveling salesman Yeah, yeah, a traveling salesman. And you'd. think, "Oh, he's just telling a joke.
from 1942.". >> [laughter]. >> And he's pretending this really happened. to him, and it's performance art. I'm. telling you, when I walk around in the. world, people. people like come out of the woodwork and. say, "Oh my god, Norm Macdonald, this. time he was on. That time he was on. This other time he was on.". And um. I just think that. there's I think people are going to be. talking about that guy 50 years from. now, you know? He He.
>> He uh and you know, and the way he told. jokes, and he was completely fearless. That's the thing. He was always so. smooth, man. Did you ever have a. underrated guest? Like so like a sneaky. guest that that was kind of your. favorite that nobody would uh I mean, there's so many different guests that. would come on and defy the label, you. know? And there are people that can come. on where. you know, they're known for being you. know, incredibly.
uh good-looking uh and or you think, "Oh, this person's going to be this. type." I'm I shot something once with uh. Tom Cruise in London where we're driving. around together. He was so great. comedically and naturally funny, and I. have to admit I had put him in a little. bit of a box of, "Well, he's an action. star guy, so. um he probably doesn't, you know, he. won't be like the funniest person." And. he was. He was really great, and he. played it perfectly, and he had really.
good ideas, and I thought, "Well, that's. on me. I put him in a box.". I I thought. you know, he's great at hanging on to. the wing of a plane and delivering like. a great [laughter] action line, but. there's no way he can I mean I I I'm not. expecting him to be funny in this way. And he was that. that and more. And I'm sure you guys. have experienced this uh doing the. podcast, which is you. you'll talk to someone and you think, well, this you know, okay, they're going.
to be really fascinating, but they're. not going to be X, Y, or Z, and then. they are a thousand times over. So, we all make we all form biases. We all. form like, okay, I'm going to talk to. these, you know, these guys and this is what we're going. to talk about and. and no, you're completely wrong. There's. people will surprise you every time. I. share that same story ironically in. London with Tom Cruise. He He just He. was one of the funniest down-to-earth. guys and it's just You just don't you.
don't think to put him in really you. don't ever want to put anybody in a. bubble, but it's just like you don't. think of it as that and he really did he. really was just the best guy. Um do you. have do you have like a favorite joke of. all time? Oh, man. No, there's too many. There've been too many. I don't think. there could be one joke that I would say. uh is my. you know, I have bits I've done that I. really love. Uh I once. um. uh.
you know, we found out that there was a. um. we found out that there was a league. that played baseball and they played. with 18. 1875. rules. Like literally the same rules. they. >> bits I've ever seen. They dressed like. it was 1875. and they they called the ball the apple, which is something that [laughter] they. really did in 1875. They'd like, you. know, pitch the apple and they talked in. that So, I showed up and I got into this.
insane costume and a fake like handlebar. mustache and I just became one of those. guys. I literally became one of those. guys and I was such an [ __ ] and I was. taunting the pitcher and saying, "HURL. THE APPLE! HURL THE APPLE!" and making. like weird jokes that were would have. been from the 1870s and the guy got. irritated. So, he whipped one really. close. really close to my head and I ducked and. then I dropped the bat and I come after.
him and I start [laughter]. putting my fists up. It's the only way. somebody fights with a handlebar. mustache. >> When I do fight both of you in a parking. lot, which will happen cuz I'll be. I'll be whacked out on Toradol. >> [laughter]. >> It will be this style and I'll get a few. pops in before you rip my torso into two. pieces and [laughter] candy comes out. He's got good reach, good reach on you. I love those moments. There are moments. where I don't even know I'm doing. comedy. I'm and you guys talk about it.
too. It's when you said. you it's the blackout moments. Those are the moments that the are the. ultimate high for me is when you're. doing your thing and it feels easy and. you're not even thinking about it and. then it's over and people say, "Oh, that. was great." and you go, "I don't even. know what happened." That's that's what. I live for. This isn't in the rundown. but I do want to ask you this cuz I'm. always fascinated with people that are. writers and also just naturally. inherently funny and you can just go. like you're talking about like. blackout they just kind of are riffing.
In football it's very easy like hey like. if you practice running routes versus. specific coverage like yeah, you know. where the open space is, you know. structurally what is. Is there like a. structure that you hone or practice in. the world of comedy that makes you able. to riff and kind of just be like that. all the time? I don't think I've ever. seen them written out but there are. certain structures that get passed on. from time to time and you mostly learn. it through. you grow up, and you look at what's.
making me laugh. Like, you know, I would. I would I took from everything. I mean, I learned from. um you know, really funny movies like. the Clouseau movies with Peter Sellers, but also uh you know, Warner Brothers. cartoons and also. you know, TV shows I really loved, and. you'd pick up on different funny people. you'd see on Johnny Carson, and you. you'd notice a certain rhythm, and it. just kind of gets into your bones. And. so, it's not so much like there's a.
textbook anywhere. I'd be very. suspicious of any book that said, "Make. sure the joke always hits on the three. Make sure that, [laughter] you know, like I would be suspicious of that. But, I do think you pick up on things, and. then. just through trial and error. and I mean, not even in front of people, but so much trial and error happens in. comedy anyway, happens first when you're. a kid around your parents and your. brothers and sisters. Then in school. Then it happens just out in life.
You're constantly seeing and adjusting. and learning on some level, but there's. no book. No one can write it out in chalk on a. board and and at with X's and O's, and. then you cut left or cut right. But, it's one of those things that you. learn just by doing over and over and. over again, and it kind of just sinks in. to your bones. I think that is. that is um. cuz I don't I you know, the minute. someone presents me with a structure, I.
would be it would bum me out, you know? I think uh you always want to be able to. surprise yourself in a moment. >> nuggets of golds here, man. Yeah, and it. makes sense because I think comedy so. much is about be doing and saying the. unexpected. So, the moment you try to. put structure to it, like it's like, okay, you. you're you're taking away the part that. kind of makes it funny is by. setting something up and then. veering a direction that nobody. anticipates you going in. Whenever. people try and analyze comedy, I think.
it just disappears. Like it suddenly. turns into the most boring conversation. cuz. like you're trying to grab smoke, you. know, and you're like, "I've got the. smoke." But then you open your hand and. it's not there. So that's that's a good. analogy. But I mean, that's kind of how. it it feels. It's just there's so many. things that are. mysterious to me and I kind of never. want to know how they work. Well, uh. you've got another stage you're hidden. uh this year and it's in a commencement. speech at Harvard. Yeah.
>> How how how do you feeling about that? How did How did that come about? >> I get a lot of. uh. energy and. inspiration from young people. So, that's the thing that's exciting to me. about it. Uh is I. I always feel like I'm a little bit like. a vampire in that I like being around. young people that are optimistic. um because. it's really easy to. get cynical or to start, you know,
feeling like you've seen it all and. um what you know, you can just enter a. phase of your life where it's easy to go. down that road and to me the antidote is. um be around young people. And uh a lot of times. you you talk to them and you think, "Oh, wow, these people are really smart. They they seem to get it. They've got a. lot of energy. I think we're in good. shape going forward." You know, it's. easy people get very, you know, dour.
about the future. Uh especially uh. adults and older adults. And when you're. around younger people, you can kind of. feel. like the world is in good hands. Oh, yeah. Well, you've been blessed by you've been. blessed with great length, Conan. You're. 6'4". We've talked about your imposing. physical stature. Have you ever. attempted to dunk a basketball? >> [laughter]. >> Yes. Yes, I have. How did it go? Well, the. ensuing surgeries took 6 years. [laughter].
There was a total reconstruction of my. my my arms. Had to be completely rebuilt. from [laughter] the ground up. Well, your arms look great. I was one of. those late bloomers, so it's like late. high school I start to shoot up, and I'm. still growing I think when I go to. college. And I'm 6'4. And people would see me and go, "Wow, you must you must be a great" People are. always throwing me a basketball and. saying, "Let's go. You know, I bet. you're amazing." And I would have to.
explain to them that height is one of. the things that helps in basketball. There are some other ones. Uh natural. ability, coordination. [laughter]. Caring Caring about where the ball is. >> [laughter]. >> Focus. And um when I would play. basketball, which I liked to do and uh I. would always do bits the whole time I. was playing basketball. That's all I'm. thinking of in my head right now. And. yeah, and uh when I'd play stickball,
too, if we would go to There was a place. that had a wall and we spray-painted. like a you know, rectangle on it for the. strike zone and you'd use a you'd use a. really thin bat and a and tennis balls, and I would always announce who my. character was. And explain my character. before I got up to to the plate, and. they'd be I mean, there'd be people that. were laughing and there'd be other. people that were like, "Jesus Christ. What are we" And I'd be like, "Okay, this next guy just got out of prison. He.
went for This is a real guy. I had a. character whose name was Nicky Fist, who. was the most hated man in baseball." And. I'd say, "Now, Nicky Fist is up at the. plate. He just got out of prison. He did. 2 years for manslaughter because in a. rage he threw his bat into the stands. killing an old woman. Fans hate him, you. know, he's been banned from the sport, but he's back tonight. Nicky Fist. And. then they'd be like, "Can't you just. play the game?" This is the game. Thank. you. This is the much more important. game. That's the game I was obsessed. with and Bob Odenkirk and I lived in.
Chicago and we did a comedy show there. once years and years ago when we were in. our early 20s and. he and I would go to shoot baskets and I. would pull my shirt up and put it over. my face. so that you couldn't I couldn't see and. I had my shirt over my face. and I would say, "I'm the phantom." A. guy who magically shows up at a. basketball court and I'm the phantom and. then I would try to play with my shirt. over my face and. >> [laughter].
>> And of course Bob would go into, "Ah, phantom, maybe if you took the mask off. no one can KNOW MY IDENTITY.". >> [laughter]. >> PEOPLE WOULD PASS THIS IN Chicago on the. north side. People would pass this idiot. with his. >> [laughter]. >> And I'd be I'd be missing not just the. rim, but I would be missing I wouldn't. even I mean I'd just be throwing the. ball up into the. the street because I can't see, but that. was more interesting to me than actually. trying to get the ball in the hoop.
>> [laughter]. >> That's [ __ ] good, man. If I played. for like the Eagles or the Chiefs for. one day, the coaches would have blood coming OUT. THEIR EARS. >> [laughter]. [screaming]. >> CUZ THEY'D SAY, "ALL RIGHT, GUYS, LET'S. GO. We're going to run this formation.". I'D SAY, "HOLD ON. HOLD ON. My name IS. GIUSEPPE ALDALDO.". >> [laughter]. >> I'M FROM ITALY. AND they'd be like, "What the hell?
What's he doing?" You know. It's [ __ ] gold though, man. To be. honest though, that's you need some of. that in every. in every like building, every workplace. Like you need that ability to just be. let everybody be themselves and as long. as you're being productive, but I I. I would have [ __ ] died if to be a. part of any of those [ __ ] games. Keep. it in mind cuz I know, you know, you. just signed up again, Travis. So. >> Oh, yeah, baby. I'll come into the. locker room. If you guys are getting.
your asses kicked, I'll come into the. locker room, you know, at halftime and. I'll I'll you know, I'll be a character. Boy, will people get pissed. You'll be. laughing. But everyone else will be get him THE. [ __ ] OUT OF HERE. OH, I CAN'T WAIT TO BRING THAT TO COACH. REED. YEAH, YEAH, tell him. Oh, I bet. he's going to be all over that. >> [laughter]. >> We got one last question. Uh do you have. a welcome to Hollywood moment, Conan? Um.
that's a good question. Um let's see. A. welcome to Hollywood mo uh yeah. Um I'm going to say. >> [laughter]. >> that's a great I came out. I grew up in Boston, went to school in. Boston. uh and then went right to LA in 1985. I'm 22 years old. and. I thought. cuz I didn't know anything. I mean. you know, I I was such a rube. I was.
such a naive guy. And so. my writing partner and I, this guy Greg. Daniels, we were like, "Hey, let's go Hollywood." We'll we rented a. um hotel a hotel room cuz we needed a. place to stay and when you when you. know, when we got started. So we rented. a really cheap hotel in Hollywood. because I thought Hollywood was where. all the stars lived and it was going to. be really fancy and I couldn't believe.
how cheap this hotel room was. So Greg and I fly out on this really. cheap flight. It was called People's. Express. This is [laughter] before your. You guys aren't even born yet, but. >> Still Still Still ripping cigs on the. plane or what? Oh, my It was JUST I'M. >> [laughter]. >> IT WAS JUST. LITERALLY THIS IS IN THE day where you. don't need a reservation. You barely. have to show your ID. You show up, you. give them like $60, and they throw you.
in this cattle car that's an airplane, and you you fly across the country. And we land, and we go, and the sun is. setting, and we get to our little tiny. place in Hollywood like with a Bunsen. burner, you know, and. and then we go out. We should get. something to eat, and we start walking. around, and we're walking down Hollywood. Boulevard on like a Saturday night. And. um it is not what I thought. It is, you.
know, strip. I mean, it's strip clubs. It's a really. depressing, cheesy. There's It's just It. is It is the most And And we're walking. around, and when I said I'm a young 22, I was 22, but I was 6'4". I was 158 lb. Oh my god. >> I was so skinny. And I was at that age. where anything I ate just dissolved into.
just became nervous energy and hair. So, I'm walking around, and I'm getting. propositioned by men, women. Uh there's. like neon blinking. Uh there's trash everywhere. There's. needles on the sidewalk. And I was like, you know, where is. Harrison Ford? >> [laughter]. >> WHERE IS HALLE. WHERE IS HALLE BERRY? This is. >> [laughter]. >> frightening. So, yeah, I had a real quick education.
that. that no, I I'm not going to. not going to be hanging out on Hollywood. and Vine at night unless I become a male. prostitute which. >> [laughter]. >> is still is still a goal of mine. A. future still still there for the taking. Conan, this is this has been. outstanding. We can't thank you enough. >> my face [ __ ] hurts, man. You are the. you're the best, brother. We can't thank. you for the time. The stories are epic. um and wishing you nothing but the best, man. I want to thank you because I've.
never appeared cooler to my staff than. uh and I've [laughter] got. I've got two fans over here who are. losing their [ __ ]. uh and um and also I'll say this on a. sincere note, you're both really funny, really nice people and that comes. through and that's huge and so I'm just. overjoyed to get to talk to both of you, seriously. And uh you know, stay. healthy, be good and anytime. Jason, you need your kids to be screamed.
at, you know, wait till your wife's out. of town. >> [laughter]. >> Wait till the wife is out of town. >> Yes. >> [laughter]. >> Yeah. All right, this has been a joy, guys. The best, dude. Conan O'Brien, ladies. and gentlemen. Let's go. >> Bye. You're the best, Conan. All right, that does it for Conan. Did not disappoint. Did not disappoint. >> Just [ __ ] electric, man. We've been. trying to make that episode happen for a. long time and you know, he's just like a.
legend in our eyes from growing up. watching him. The fact that he's still freaking just. like Dude, it's so cool. >> man. In every way. He's going to host. the Oscars and that we're going to get. to see him jump through a table at. Bill's Mafia, it sounds like on tour at. all. Jason, you going to. >> be more thrilled with. I'm definitely doing tour at all. I'm. jumping through another table. I want to. see it. All righty, that wraps up. another episode of New Heights. Thank. you, Conan O'Brien, for being here. You. can watch Conan host the Oscars this.
Sunday. Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend. releases every Monday and Thursday. Oh, and make sure you subscribe to the New. Heights channel on YouTube and wherever. you get your podcasts. That's right. Once again, New Heights, a Wondery show. brought to you by Hill's Pet Nutrition. Get those little furry friends of yours, or non-furry friends of yours, uh the. healthiest food that they can get so. they can live to be big, strong boys, uh or girls. Uh follow the show on all. social media at New Heights Show with. one S, and thanks to our production. team. Our New Heights production team.
And uh all the 92%ers out there, we uh. wouldn't do this without you, I promise. See you guys next week. >> [music]. >> I do got to say, the moment you said the. thing about cats growing up, I knew you. were going to be a Will Ferrell fan. That That audition for SNL, where he's. playing with the make-believe cat, one. of my favorite things of all time. That's a guy who, and talk about a guy. who's doing it 24/7, he and I were on a.
flight once, cross-country, like, you. know, with they sat us next to each. other on a on a on a red-eye. I can only. imagine. We did a bit the whole time. I. never once asked him how are you, how's. your wife, how's your life. He never. once asked me. We did a bit that lasted. 6 hours. >> [laughter]. >> Let's go. >> How does that start? You just like. immediately go and they just and and. Will just knows you're doing a bit? >> I see Will's dead eyes. He's got the.
eyes of a doll, the shark's eyes. >> [laughter]. >> He's got. uh right out of Jaws. He's just got. those dead eyes, and he's looking at me, and I started to talk to him about my. love of books. And I cuz I had a book in. my lap, and we both went into these. characters who talked for 6 hours. uh as if they love books but neither one. of them could read. THAT WAS THE JOKE. [laughter]. FLIGHT ATTENDANTS ARE COMING AND we're. like waving them off. And like I could. have just had a fatal diagnosis, but I. wouldn't have told him cuz we're in this.
>> [laughter]. >> now, you know WHAT I MEAN? SO STUPID.
