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One year of being intentional got me an. Olympic gold medal. Just one [music]. year. >> Just one year. >> Just one year. So, a lot can happen in a. year. >> What you're about to learn is [music]. going to help you turn your dreams into. reality. I became a mom and I won a. world championship [music]. 2 years after having my son. Time will. honor your greatness. >> Visualization is [music] something that. you use in your training. How do you use. it. >> on a Friday? Yes. When we train, we.

[music] actually train our minds on a. Friday. We call it mental training. Cuz. before you can achieve anything, you. have to see it in your mind first. Visualization [music] is you putting. yourself in a winning position before. you have won. >> Visualization is something that you. don't have to pay for. [music] You don't. need money for it. You just need to sit. with yourself and see it. That. presentation, that hard conversation,

that relationship that you probably need. to [music] end, that friendship that you. need to walk away from and you don't. know how to do it. Do it in your mind. first. It becomes easier after. What has losing and failure taught you. that winning never could? >> Failure tells you how. >> Failure tells you how. >> How? Yeah. Because when you fail, you. realize, okay, then the next thing is I. am so glad you're here. This episode.

with Shellyley and is extraordinary. But. before we jump into it and how you build. an unstoppable mindset, my team was. showing me this. 53% of you who watch. the Mel Robbins podcast here on YouTube. are not subscribers. Here's the deal. If. that subscribe button is lit up, it. means you're not a subscriber. My goal. is to get that number to 50%. If you. love what we're doing here, it would be. amazing for you to just hit subscribe. It's the best way to show us that you. love the show, you love these.

extraordinary experts that we're. bringing on like Shelley today to be. your personal coach and that way you're. not going to miss a thing. So, thank. you, thank you, thank you for hitting. subscribe. Thank you for being here on. YouTube. Now, let's jump in to how you. build an unstoppable mindset with. Shelley Frasier Price. You're going to. love this. >> Thank you. So, thank you so much for. having me. Thank you for saying yes. Thank you for traveling all this way. I. I am so excited to learn from you. You. have this energy.

that is infectious. I feel like I'm in a stadium. Yes. >> Of fans that are celebrating. You have. an effervescence to you that is. contagious. >> Thank you. >> Is that what makes you run so fast? It's. like I don't like I. I wish I wish it was so easy. >> Well, I'm glad you're here because we're. going to be talking a lot about mindset. >> And I have a feeling that.

you're also about to teach us a lot of. wisdom about something deeper than. mindset. >> Yeah. Correct. >> And I'd love to start by having you. speak directly to the person who's with. us right now. and they may be feeling. overwhelmed or full of self-doubt or. feeling like they're too old or too. young or worried about everybody else's. opinion. >> Mhm. >> If they take everything to heart that. you're about to teach us from your. remarkable life so far,

what could there be that could change. about their life? Well, Mel, here's what. I would say for me personally. Growing. up in Kingston in Waterhouse, I had to. decide. And I think that's the most. important thing I would say to to anyone. that's listening is to decide. Is to say. to yourself, I want to move from a place. of average to a place of excellence. I've always been taught that I have to. be and become extraordinary. And in.

order to be and become extraordinary, you have to decide in your mind what is. it that you're going to hold on to? What. is it that you're going to tell. yourself? And you have to really commit. to the positive and encouraging things. that you tell yourself cuz that's the. only way you're going to move from. average to great. So that's what I would. say. Decide who you want to be. Decide. on, you know, just where you want to end. up in next 5 10 years. And every morning.

that you get up, you decide to put one. foot in front of the other and say, I'm. going to be great. I'm going to be. extraordinary. I'm going to be. excellence. Cuz that's the only way. The. minute you change your mindset is the. minute you start to tap into that. unfiltered raw truth, strength, boldness. that we all carry. Okay. My hair is. already standing on end. And as you're. listening to Shellyley and she you're.

speaking with such a level of intention. like you believe this. >> Yeah, I do. And you have to. >> you have to but I can tell that shit's. about to go down in this conversation. The energy is crackly. And I want to. start by asking this question about the. outside versus the inside because people. see all the metals, all the records. We. not only see the confidence, you can. feel it in your body in the way that you. speak. But what's the part of your story. that we do not see? The part of the.

story no one sees is the BTS, the behind. the scenes, the challenges. Sometime. it's the fear, the doubts. It's the. things that we tell oursel in the. moments that will eventually stifle us. And I think for me, I've had to overcome. those moments. I've had to really sit in. those moments and say to myself, well, this is not the end. This is not it. I. have more to give. And I had to talk to. myself. I had to sacrifice because I. think growing up in Waterhouse, dreaming.

is a luxury because we don't get to. dream often when we're in an environment. that seems stifling. It seems, you know, just there's no way out. So dreaming. becomes a luxury. So now you're in this. moment where you're saying, "Okay, then. you're chasing medals, you're chasing. records, you're chasing growth, you're. chasing excellence." But the behind the. scenes that people are not seeing is the. struggle that sometimes you'll have with. your mind because we all have that. People think that the champion mindset.

is just winning. It's not just winning. It's sticking to your purpose. It's. really trusting the promise that you. have already made to yourself and go for. it. So, it's the moments I have to wake. up at 5:00 a.m. to get to practice. It's. the moment I have to sacrifice not going. out because I'm chasing something big. I'm chasing impact. I'm chasing that. young girl who is in Waterhouse who felt. like there's no way out. I'm teaching. the young girls in my community to. understand that excellence does not just.

belong to me, it belongs to them. And. it's important for them to understand. those things. So when I sit with myself. behind the scene, it's the motivation. from my husband, it's my son, it's the. moment when I feel okay, then the doubts. are coming in and I I have to really say. to myself, come on, you can do it. Get. out of it. Get out of it. One foot in. front of the other, keep going. It's the. injuries that we have to overcome as. athletes and as individuals because I. think a lot of persons don't know that.

injuries don't just happen to athletes, it happens to everyday individuals. And. you have to channel that intention in. your mind to say I can overcome. I've. been there. It's the the limitation that. we tell ourselves when people say to. oursel say to us, "Oh, you're too old or. you're too young or you know, you've had. enough. No more." It's those things that. you're battling with behind the scenes. So when someone see you stepping to the. line, you have already conquered so many. things behind the scenes. So when we.

step to the line to compete for a. presentation, when we step to the line. for you know a big job or a presentation. or whatever it is, understand that the. persons who are standing there would. have had to overcome so many things to. get there. >> Okay, you just said so many things that. are. wise and tactical. So I want to stop and. hover here for a second. Dreaming is a. luxury. >> Yeah.

What would you say to the person right. now who's listening who says, "I feel. like I can't even dream right now, that. I can't imagine something that's. possible." You talked about how you. really want to be an example to the. young girls that have big dreams, that. have a sense of purpose, but maybe the. world is telling them, "Oh, well, that's. impossible. That's unrealistic. Somebody. like you doesn't do something like. that." What would you say to the person.

that's so just head down that they. haven't even thought about the dream? That's a luxury. It's also a necessity. I think. >> it is. Um I think what I will say is. stop asking can I stop asking for. permission to be great. Stop asking. people who have no idea what's going on. or what dreams you're trying to chase or. where you're coming from or where you're. heading. You have to start paying. attention and listening to your own.

voice. That's the only voice that's. important, your voice. Because your. voice is the most important voice in the. room. That's the relationship. You want. to focus on the relationship with your. voice. The minute you change that. relationship, you start to understand. that, okay, this is what Shelly wants. This is what, you know, Mel wants, and. this is what you're going to chase. stop. focusing on the the voices that are. external. Those are just white noise.

They're not important, right? Because. they don't understand what it is to be. in the moment chasing something that's. great, chasing something that you want, that you have committed to, that you. have decided to. A champion mindset. doesn't mean that you're not going to. fail. Failure is a part of success, right? So, you have to count on. yourself. Channel the energy in the. voice that is your own and focus on that. voice. Whenever you step into a room,

it's your voice that is important. I've. heard you say that especially in. reflecting about your career. Can you. unpack the power of that statement? A. lot can change in a year. >> One year of being intentional got me an. Olympic gold medal. Just one year. >> Just one year. just one year because. what you did in that year is you changed. your outlook. You changed your approach. So a lot can happen in a year. I've seen.

athletes like myself go from being. nobody to an extraordinary athlete. In. 2007, I was at the World Championship in. Osaka as a reserve. >> What does that mean? >> A reserve mean I came six. I would be. called upon if somebody got hurt or. somebody didn't want to run. That's the. only time they would call on me. I. wasn't the number one, the number two, the number three, or the number four. I.

was number six. It means there are four. persons that run on a relay. I was six. So the chances of me running in that. relay were slim. A year after. being in Osaka, the next year I was. Olympic champion. So it's not it it's not just for me. where one year I went from being sixth. to being first, it belongs to you as.

well. M. >> so if you change your mindset, your. outlook, and you say to yourself, okay, you have to recognize the power of. consistency. Cuz I think that's what. changed the approach for me. I became. consistent at the small things. I said, "Okay, I'm going back to training. I'm. going to make sure that I show up at. 5:00 a.m. because practice is at 5:00. a.m. I wasn't there at 5:30. I was there. in the cold because I refuse.

>> I refuse to lose. And you have to, that's the mindset. You have to refuse. to lose. Somebody will need to drag you. off the field. And I'm not just talking. about the track. I'm talking in life. Somebody has to pull you out. They have. to call the announcers and say, "Oh, take her out." But until then, you're. staying in. So I've seen athletes take. one year and be that year they became. they were humbled in a year because they. didn't put the work in. They changed.

their approach. So when I say a lot can. happen in a year it's the mindset that. you become consistent at what you do and. you work towards it because you now have. a one whole year to decide what you're. doing. Decide how you show up each. morning. put one foot in front of each. other and then you go and you keep going. and you going because for me there is. time. A lot of person say, "Oh, you have. all the time in the world." And you. think one year, for the person who is.

chasing mediocrity, one year is small. For the person who is chasing greatness, one year is a lot. You have a lot of. time. And if you have that time, you. make it count. So, I w to put you in that moment in. 2007 because even though most of us will. never be a reserve on a team like that, right? We're going to be in the stands. watching you. There is an experience. that I think we all have in life where. you find yourself in a situation where.

you are really close to the thing that. you want, but you're kind of on the. outside of it. And I'll share a quick. story. I have my daughter is a singer. songwriter and she was invited to a like. a record release kind of performance by. an artist she really loves and she. walked into the room and it was. incredible. But when she left she had. this feeling of saying I want to be.

doing that. I want to be known in a room. like that. And those moments where you. get close to the thing that you want. You're number six. You want to be number. one, right? >> I think those moments really define you. because you either collapse and say it's. never going to be me. >> or you rise. >> Yes. Or you rise and say it is painful. to want something and not work for it.

And it's painful to work for it and not. get it, but I'm gonna go for it. And so. what changed for you as you were number. six and I take it nobody got injured. >> and so you stayed number six. >> I actually ran. >> You did? >> I did. I was. So let me tell you the. story. I have to tell you this story. >> So in 2007 when I went to Osaka and I. made the relay squad for team Jamaica. My real intention of going to Osaka was.

just to be there small-minded. At that. time my thinking was very small, my. dreams were small, my confidence small. So I get there and they're you know. having all this fit about who runs or. who doesn't run. >> and I'm like and I hope they don't call. on me [laughter]. because for me the weight of the moment. was so big and mentally I think I wasn't. prepared for a moment like this. So, I. was just there for just being there. And.

I remember the coach calling and said, "Oh, you're running?" And I'm like, "I'm. running." And he goes, "Yes, you're. running." I cried because I didn't want. to be responsible for any mishap in a. relay. A relay depends on three other. persons to take the baton home. I didn't. want to be responsible for that. So, I. cried. And I remember I ran the relay. Now I did I carried bottom home first in. the heats but I didn't run the finals.

But you know what changed for me? >> What? I wanted to be responsible for my. own win. >> That changed. I was responsible for. three other people and I was in awe the. moment. I I was crippled in that moment. and I said to myself, I want to stand on. the line and anything that I lose, it's. mine to lose. Anything that I win, it's. mine to win and I want to own it within. my entire being. And I went home from.

Osaka and I changed the way I ate. I. started going gym. I became disciplined. because I wanted to feel like I had the. power and nobody else had that to. choose. >> Because here I was in that moment. running a 4x1 and they were debating if. I should run or if I shouldn't or if I. was going to drop the baton, if I was. going to be good, whatever. But in that. moment, I wanted to make that decision. for me. I wanted to make that decision.

when I stand at the line and I'm. competing. If I win, it's for me. If I. lose, it's for me. And those things are. very important because nobody gets to. take them away from you. Nobody. >> Oh, let's just let that sit for a minute. because a lot can change in a year. >> A lot can change in a year. >> What changed? >> The mindset changed. The cont. >> Yeah, that's so real. Like I left.

going to a world championship thinking I. wasn't worthy of being in that moment to. going to the Olympic Games a year later. and being happy and content and knowing. that I had the power to win even though. when I got there my dream was so small. because I just wanted to make the. finals. >> That was your dream for the Olympics. like, "Okay, I'm going to make the. finals.

>> I'm going to make the finals." And that. was my dream going into the Olympics. I. was going to make the finals. And I. remember, and this is why it's it's. important that the things that you say. to yourself are good things. Be kind to. yourself. When you talk to yourself, your energy should exude positive. It. should be strength. It should be. powerful. And I remember sitting in the. room and I said to one of my teammates, "If I win, I am going to do this. I'm.

going to jump. I'm going to scream.". That was me already setting the stage. for what's to come. So when I got there. and I went to the line, I was happy to. be there. That's an outlook that changed. in a year because this was a a woman who. didn't want to run the year before to a. woman who was happy to be in that moment. because I prepared for that moment. So.

when I say a lot can change in a year, I. didn't go into that moment unprepared. I. was prepared for everything and anyone. And I got to the line and I was happy. I. was smiling. And I was content because I. was about to run the race of my life. And I knew it. My body knew it. My mind. knew it like I heard nobody else in that. moment. And I got to that line. It was. me against nobody. Because if you want it, you'll have to. beat me for it. And I remember going to.

the line and the exact same thing I told. myself couple days before I ran that. finals is the exact same thing I did. after the finals. >> What did you say? I jumped. I screamed. I ted. I did so many things. I was on. the floor. I couldn't contain myself. [laughter]. >> Well, I can't contain myself because. I've never seen one of these in person. >> Yes. >> I You brought because we asked you to. >> Yeah. >> Your medal. >> Yeah, that's my medal. In 2008, I became.

the first Caribbean woman to win an. Olympic gold medal in the 100 meters. Holy smokes. I got This thing's heavy. Is it solid gold? >> I hope so. [laughter]. >> Wow. >> It's my retirement plan. >> This is incredible. What is that moment. like, man? >> Does time like slow down? Is it this out. of This thing is really heavy. It is. I. think that moment for me, Mel, was a.

moment that. it told me that it didn't matter where. you come from or how you start. It. matters how you finish. It matters how. you show up. Because here's a a young. girl who's from an inner city, a single. parent, one room with two brothers and. my mom. And it was hard to dream. It was. hard to see beyond, you know, your. current, you know, circumstances. The. environment that you're in was hard to. see beyond that. And when I crossed that.

line, it was it was not just a win for. me. It was a win for a community. A. community of girls who never thought. they would see an Olympic champion. coming from their community. It was a. win for my mom who had me when she was. 17. It was a win for my grandma who. prayed for me the day I left to go to. college because I wasn't supposed to go. to that college. I was supposed to go.

overseas for school. And my grandmother. when I said to her, I remember saying to. her, "Hey, I'm going to stay in Jamaica. and I'm going to go to school at UTK.". And she said, "Go." That was her only. words, "Go." And I went. So for me, crossing that moment, >> it was a win, a huge win for me. Understanding that confidence, dreaming, and believing what you dream is very.

important. It's understanding that. there's nothing wrong with fear, right? Nothing is wrong with it, but we show up. in spite of. So, that's what that moment. was for me. Wow. What do you want the. person listening to know if they're. telling themselves that it's too late or. the dream is too big or it's too. impossible for them? Now. I think what I would say to you guys. listening is time will honor your.

greatness. Time that's all you need. time. For a lot of persons they look at the. clock and they think I don't have enough. time. But for the persons who is chasing. excellence and chasing growth it's never. too late when you look at the clock. It's never too late. I became the oldest. world champion at 35 years old. When. person said, "Oh, she's too old. She. needs to wrap it up. I became a mom and.

I won a world championship two years. after having my son." Time will honor. your greatness. I won my first gold. medal in 2008 when persons thought I was. too young or I was too inexperienced and. I needed to give my spot to somebody. else. So when I say all of that, I say. time. You have time. You have to show. up. Disregard the negative things that. you have said in your darkest moments to. yourself. You need to get that out. Stop.

listening to the people who have never. been in your shoe. You have to start. listening to your voice and decide which. voice is more important. Theirs are. yours. And it has to be yours. Your. voice is the most important voice in any. room. So you have to understand that. whatever it is that you're chasing, time. will honor your greatness. It's never. too late. In fact, you still have so. much more that is inside on top that's.

ready to go out, but you are listening. to the persons who are at the ceiling of. their imagination, not yours. >> I'm dead. Like I'm literally like, "Okay, we're done here." Like I can't. even [laughter] believe. >> amazing you are. You're like channeling. something. No, >> it's true. >> You are there is there is like a. transmission coming through you. >> Yeah. It's the truth. >> I can tell. Yeah.

>> I can tell in the way that you are. speaking. >> Yeah. straight from the heart and with. almost like that. if you're not going to listen to. yourself, you better listen to me. >> Yeah. >> Like borrow Shel's belief in you until. you believe in you. >> That's true. You know what's important. also is. the only dream.

that hasn't been met is the one that you. haven't started. Say that again. >> The only dream that hasn't been met is. the one you haven't started. So once you. have a dream, start it. You have all the. time in the world. Start it. Don't go to. bed thinking, "All right, I'm tired. It's not going to happen." Go to bed. thinking, "It's going to happen. No one. can stop me. I'm going to wake up in the.

morning. I'm gonna all those thoughts. because we've all been there. In the in. our darkest moments, we have told. ourselves things that are not true. In our darkest moments, we have listened. to people who have said things about us. who have no idea who you are. Like how. do you allow people who don't know who. you are, who don't know your gifts, your. talents, who don't know what you're. chasing and what what untapped abilities.

you have. How can you allow them to. determine your future? You can't. Right? The only finish line that you have never. crossed is the one you never walked up. to. So whatever finish line it is or. anything that you're chasing, walk up to. it. >> You know, it's interesting the the. finish line metaphor because that's how. you know the race you're running isn't. over. >> You know, yeah, >> you haven't crossed the finish line yet.

>> You [laughter] haven't crossed the. finish line, so it's not over. And my. coach always said, I remember my coach. said, you cross the finish line, you get. another chance. >> What does that mean? I've always gone to meets and I crossed. the finish line and I and I didn't win. and I thought, man, this is the end of. the world. And my coach was like, no, it's another day. You get another. opportunity. So, nothing is wrong with. showing up and losing. You showed up and.

your approach the next time will be. different. That's the power of getting. to the line and finishing because now. you have something tangible to look at. and evaluate and say okay let me change. my approach. which is just like traffic. We take go to school in the morning and. we drive on one route and we realize. okay I spent 20 minutes in traffic. The. next day you have knowledge now. So you.

change your approach. >> just like you did in 2007. >> and you said I'm going to change my. approach. I got to get consistent. I got. to train harder. I got to change the way. I'm approaching this. Visualization is. something that you use in your training. How do you use it and how can the person. listening apply that same strategy to. their life? >> So Mel, I give you on a Friday. >> Yes. When we train, we actually train.

our minds on a Friday. It's our we call. it mental training because before you. can achieve anything, you have to see it. in your mind first. You have to feel it. And visualization is you putting. yourself in a winning position before. you have all before you have won. >> That's what visualization is. Visualization is you seeing yourself. doing it not perfectly but powerfully.

That's what visualization is. So when I. use visualization, it's important for me. to even smell the the atmosphere, okay, >> to feel it because sometimes our mind. can't distinguish between what reality. is and what's real. We can't, right? We. can't figure out what's real or what's. fake when it comes to our mind because. our mind is that powerful. So it is up. to you to train your mind to see the.

things that you want to achieve. So when. I get to the line, I have ran that race. many times before I get to that line. And I'm not talking about the day before. the race. I'm talking months before the. race. Every time I have an alone time, I'm visualizing. I get to the line. I. hear the starter. I listen to the cues. Do you hear the like all the people. putting their feet in the box? >> I'm going to tell you this. When I'm at. the line, I hear nobody.

>> Nobody. because I'm not listening to. them. The only person I'm listening for. is the instruction of the starter. When. the starter says on your mark, on your. mark is something that I've already. visualized. So my body knows when the. starter says on your mark, it's go time. My body knows when I get to the line, I've already seen myself in the block. I. see myself crossing the line. I see with.

each step that I take, I feel it because. I've already seen it. So, you have to. use visualization as a a as a map. It's. one of those, you know, maps that you. have in your in your mind. Okay, I'm. going to point B. So, in order to get to. point B, I have to make sure that I'm. successful at A at A. Right? So, you're. seeing it. You going to that. presentation. You want to feel it. You. want to see it. Visualization exists.

long before the vision board. Long. before it. It's a small step. Visualization is something that you. don't have to pay for. You don't need. money for it. You don't need no paper. You don't need no pen. You need nothing. You just need to sit with yourself and. see it. That presentation, that hard. conversation, that relationship that you. probably need to end, that friendship. that you need to walk away from and you. don't know how to do it, do it in your. mind first. it becomes easier after. I.

want to make sure you really heard what. she said that Fridays is not running. day. >> It's not running day. >> Friday we are training a different. muscle. >> as a world champion. You're training. your mind. And what I also love that you. pointed out is this is free. >> It's free. Yeah, >> it is. And you're built to do it. >> You're built to do. We all have the. power to visualize. So use it. Right. Because one thing I know about. visualization is visualization is.

preparation. It's me preparing for the moment. If I. get to the line and I have not even. thought about running the race, then. what purpose does that serve? Right? If. you're going for the presentation and. you're trying to get the promotion, if. you haven't seen yourself in that. position, what sense does it make? You. have to see yourself that big job. You. have to see yourself in it. You have to.

see yourself walking away like in your. head. You're going like, "All right, yeah, girl, you have this. You got. this." So, when you have prepared, because that's what visualization is. You It's a preparedness. >> You have prepared. So, I've seen the. race over and over and over, and I run. it over and over and over in my mind. So, when I get to the line, it's just go. time. It's work time. It's eat time. It's time to eat. That's what happens in. that moment because your body is already. prepared. Yes.

>> Your body knows what we're up against. I. remember there's once I went I went to a. mental training on a Friday and it was. hard at first. And visualization is. practice. Cuz it doesn't come easy the. first time because I'm sitting there in. in in the mental training and my coach. is like, "Close your eyes. See yourself. in the in the stadium." And I'm at KFC. and I'm sometimes I'm drifting to the. beach [laughter].

or somewhere and I have to find a queue. to pull you back. You always should have. a Q. >> What's your Q? My Q is always saying to. myself that greater is he that is in me. than he that is in the world. >> Say that again. >> Greater is he that is in me than he that. is in the world. There is no fear in. love. Cuz perfect love cast out fear. Because with what you love, you cannot. fear. And I love to run. I love to win. So I don't fear it. Instead, I get to.

the line. I'm confident and I'm ready. because I've seen it. This is my moment. This is my passion. This is the. sometimes your promises that you have. that's your purpose. Your purpose is the. promises that you have already set for. yourself. >> So when I get there, I've already. prepared to be in that moment. So when I. stand at the line and I feel like, okay, I'm drifting because now I'm focusing on. who's beside me. I'm focusing on the the. crowd. What's the crowd going to do? They can't help me. What's the next.

person? They also want to win. So, I'm. not helping you win. I'm helping me win. >> Oh, I love that. When you focus on them, you're helping them win. >> You're helping them win. I don't want. them to win. >> Can we Can we unpack that for a minute? Because so many of us are focused on. what everybody else is doing. And when. you do that, you're helping them win. >> You are helping them win. You're not. helping yourself win. Because I'm telling you, they are. probably focused on you and you're. giving your power to them. Like, I'm.

giving you no power. But when I get to. the line, I'm an assassin. I'm there to win. And it means mentally. I'm there to win as well. So when I get. to the line, I'm not concerned who is in. lane five or six or seven or eight or. one or two. The reality is I, which is. the I. In that moment, the I become. selfish. It's about you and how you show. up to win. If I'm there carrying. somebody else's baggage, how am I.

getting to the plane? The plane is going. to leave you. So yeah, don't focus on. who is to the left or to the right. because you're not going to the left and. you're not going to the right. You're. going forward forward cuz that's the. only way you win. I've never seen. anybody win going backwards. I've never. seen it. If it happens, let me know. But. I've never seen it. How do you use. somebody that is ahead of you to help.

you become a better competitor or a. better mom or a better this? Because I. do think that there are those times and. this kind of goes back to when you were. number six. >> and then you got asked to be part of the. team and then you had the realization. that wait, I want to win or lose for me. >> I want to stand on my own here. If I'm. not paying attention to this person, I'm. not paying attention to that person, but. I keep seeing somebody else out in the. world doing something in a way that kind. of makes me jealous, kind of pisses me.

off, and also kind of inspires me. How. do you use somebody else's example. in the right way to activate your own. ability to perform potentially pass. them? You know what I'm saying? I. understand exactly what you're saying. and that's good because guess what? Every single person there is in this. lifetime have learned something from. somebody whether those they're a winner. or they're not. The champion uses every.

experience to gain an advantage. >> That's just the reality. In Jamaica. there's a saying that when somebody. feeds you meat. or chicken, you eat the meat, you leave. the bone. It's not the bone is not going. to help you. The meat is where the. substance is. So if that person that's. in front of you that you think I want to. emulate that person, there's something. that she has that I want, take the meat, leave the bone. Whatever it is that she.

has that benefits you and you think you. can use it, use it. For a lot of us, we. are in a we are in a shell where there's. somebody that we're either jealous of or. somebody that you know, some people. would say, I hate this person. But guess. what? That person that you're jealous of. or probably the person that you hate, there's something that they have that. you want. So instead of hating for no. reason, take the things that they have.

that are going to help you to get to. your destiny. sooner than later. So your friend Usain Bolt said that when. he looks at your career and the fact. that you have been so great for so long. that you make him feel like an. underachiever. What can the person listening learn from. you about holding yourself to such a.

high standard, especially on those days. when you don't feel like it? Here's what I'll say. Motivation can change. Standards don't. >> Oh, motivation can change. >> But standards don't. Cuz standard is. what is who you are. Is what you have. Because sometimes your motivation will. change. You know what motivates you. today may not be the thing that. motivates you tomorrow. But your. standards are who you are. It's it's.

everything. It's, you know, who I am is. not determined by how I feel on any. given day, >> right? So for me, that's your standard. You have to make sure that. you hold your standards on days when. it's hard because you know you're. building something unbreakable. >> That that's what your standard. And. you're saying if Usain says that, you. know, it's coming. You're saying he's.

great in his own way, right? But for me. personally, it's my standards that gives. me longevity. It's the the things that I. hold dear to to me, the things that I'm. chasing and I want to achieve. And I. know I have it, right? So I understand. that on a daily basis, your motivation can change because some. of us are motivated. by probably somebody who wronged us. And. what if you move that person out of the.

way? What motivates you then? You can't have your motivation. be tied to a person. because that person for whatever it work. can leave. They can't change. They go. somewhere else. So you have to have your. standards. Some days I go to training. I. don't want to train. There's no motivation. But you know. what? I have standards, high standards.

So every time I get to training, I. remember the standards that I have. My. standards are excellence. >> I want excellence. How does one achieve. excellence? Consistency. Show up in spite of how does one have. standards? They move from a place of fear to. boldness. Discipline is a resident, right? It it res No, it's not. It's. there. It resides there. That's what.

discipline is. That's the standard. Motivation. comes and goes. It sure does. Comes and. goes. You know, I'm wondering because I. it's so inspiring to listen to you and. there's such a rhythm and truth to. everything that you're sharing and it's. easy especially and even if you're in a. place where you're just feeling a little. beaten down and stuck. >> and as I'm listening I'm like, "Yes, standards. Yes, excellence. Yes, I'm.

with you." And then I go, >> "It's true. >> What are my standards? What what what. does excellence mean in my life?" And. I'd be curious if somebody is feeling. really knocked down and I have a lot of. friends that I've heard them say over. the years, I don't even know who I am. anymore. Do you have any recommendation. for how you could set a standard for. yourself today. that will pull you toward excellence?

It's like is there something that if you. had to recommend okay if you don't know. what your standards are if you feel like. life has kicked you down one way to. develop standards for yourself because. if you don't stand for something you. stand for nothing. >> nothing at all. >> but is there something that you could. give the person that's listening like. this is where I would start if I were. starting over and thinking about my own. standards. >> Yeah I would say small steps. Small steps. It doesn't have to be big. You have to, everybody has to start with.

small intentional steps. The smaller. steps you make, the more you can go to. the bigger steps eventually because. you're not rushing into it. Because for. a lot of us finding our standards take. time because we have I can tell you this. we have history where because we have. done things a particular way for years. trying to erode those things takes time.

right it takes time to get rid of the. bad habits so I would say start with the. small things if it is getting up early. in the morning and making your bed then. that's the standard. I'm going to get up. in the morning. I'm going to make my. bed. I'm going to have some coffee. I'm. going to visualize for 20 minutes. And. that's how you start with your. standards, right? You write that down. And then who knows a week from that you. add something else to it. And that. becomes a routine. And when you have.

your routine, your build, your routine. becomes consistent. So you're consistent with your routines. and you're consistent with your. standard. So small steps doesn't have to. be big. It has to be yours. Can't be. anybody else's. It has to be yours. So I. don't want my standards for you. Sure, you can use. you can use me. >> I'm going to eat the meat but not the. bone. See, I'm listening. >> You're eating the meat, but you're not.

You're leaving the bone. and you apply. that to your life and you say okay these. are my stand and I can say this your. standards are yours you can't let or. allow anyone else to make you think that. something is wrong with yours there's. nothing wrong because guess what yours. work for you mine works for me but it's. intentional steps that you take daily. and you start small doesn't have to be. that big grand okay I'm going to get up.

it's almost like the New Year. resolution. I'm not a big fan of New. Year resolution, right? I'm being honest. because I think sometimes I make those. because everybody else is making them. and it doesn't work for me because by. the time the second of January come, I. remember nothing. So, you have to make. or tailor your standards to you, to your. dayto-day, to what you can start with, and then you move from there. You know, one of the things that I think we've all.

seen and some of us have experienced is. how easy it is to let your failures. >> block you. Whether it's a failed. relationship or a failed dream that you. tried or maybe you failed at the career. or job that you really went for. What. has losing and failure taught you that. winning never could? Mel, in my years of competing, I like to.

consider myself an expert at track and I. expert at losing because I lost a lot. But failure introduces us to our part of. ourselves that we didn't know was there. >> The part that we need to grow, the part. that we need to approach different. Failure introduces us to things that. winning couldn't show us. Because when. you win, you think you have it all. figured out. You think, "All right, I. won. I don't need to change anything.

I'm good." But failure can introduce you. to a part that you realize that, okay, then my success didn't show me that. But my failure taught me that, hey girl, we need to work at this a little bit. more. >> There's another approach. We can try. another way. We can go through this gate. and we'll end up at the same place. That's what failure does. It for me, some of my greatest wins came after a.

loss. Really? Yes. Some of my greatest win came after a. loss. Remember, I came sixth at the. world championship um national. championship at my at at in Jamaica. And I went back home and I worked hard. and I I came back. In 2016, I had a sesamoidis. >> You had a. So there are two small bones. I'm not a.

doctor. >> That sounds that sounds terrible. A. sesameitis. What is that? like. [laughter]. I had there's two small bones under your. great toe that's responsible to. >> under your big toe or your grade toe. that's responsible for balance. >> Oh no. >> Right. >> What happened? >> So that's where when you're in the. blocks or you're running that becomes. the planting that's responsible for the. power that you generate. >> That's a very important little bone. >> Very important little bone. And I.

fractured it and I couldn't put my foot. in my spike. What? Like we I was in. tears. This is 2016 Olympic Games. I was. chasing becoming the first woman to win. three Olympic games back to back. No, I did not know who I was in that moment. because it was so hard because at that. point I have I won 2008, 2009,

2012, 2013, 2015. and here my face with 2016. and I'm saying to myself, how do I. navigate this space? I didn't know how. I couldn't put my foot in my shoe. I. couldn't do anything in practice. I was. out of practice for a while. But you. know what I did? I found another way. I I said, "Okay, then it's not going to. work the normal way that I did it, but.

I'll find another way." And I had now. had to train my mind more in that. moment. And I got to that 2016 world um. Olympic Games in Rio. I came third. I I. came third. So I didn't become the first. woman to win an Olympic three Olympic. medals back to back. >> Well, you won one. Are you talking gold? >> But gold. I got the bronze medal. >> Okay. Well, I'd be happy with the. bronze. I think. >> I was talking What was the other way?

Like what did you do? Did you learn how. to press on the four other toes and like. lift up the the big toe? >> I had to makeshift putting my toe in my. spike. I had to put cushion in there. And then I realized it wasn't going to. work. So it means I had to train today, not train the next day, miss a week, and. I had to focus on the things that I. could like going into the gym. I could. lift heavier, go to the pool, did work. in the pool, go to my rehab, did my.

rehab. Because here's what. failure tells you how. Failure tells you. how. >> How? Yeah. Because when you fail, you. realize, okay, then the next thing is. you know how you're going to do the next. thing. It tells you how. So you have to. don't look as don't look at failure as. separate. >> It's not the opposite of success. It's.

not. It's actually a part of it. >> Failure is a a success. You can't look at it as separate because. in reality a lot of persons I never. quit. I didn't quit. I lost but I didn't. quit. I failed but I didn't quit. The. persons who. lost are the ones who quit after a. failure. I didn't quit. I went back to. the drawing board and I came back. In.

2017 I had my son. In 2019, I won the. world championship. in Doha. And in 2022, I won the world. championship in in Oregon. In 2022, I became. the third fastest woman in the world. At. 2022, I ran 10 sixes. six or seven time in a season. In 2022, I won the Laurius award. in 2022, I I.

won. So, look at failure as a part of. success. Has to be a part of it because. guess what? I didn't quit. Here's what I. love about what you're just explaining. to us. It's now seems so obvious now that. you've explained your relationship to. failure and the fact that because you. didn't quit and you recognize failure. shows you how how you need to change in.

order to continue forward. >> like failure is actually a sign for how. not to quit. It's a pivot, right? >> It's a pivot. If you change the. approach, you adjust. You come back. again or you don't quit. Well, you know, it's interesting because I often say to. myself, the things that made me. successful in 2024 will not make me. successful in 2025. And there's the. consistency in the standards, but then. you have to understand that often the.

way to win the race that you're playing. or the way to stay in the race that. you're playing is to recognize when the. old way you were doing things, whether. it's how you trained or your attitude or. whatever it may be, isn't going to work. moving forward. >> It's not going to work going forward. Because that's what failure really it. that's what it does. It says, "Okay, that approach that you tried, it didn't. work. Can we try something else? Can we. try a new approach? Because that's what.

you do when you lose and you go back to. the drawing board. If you listen to all. the speeches. or after interviews when a a a champion. loses and they get they like, "Oh, I. need to go back to the drawing board.". I've never heard them say, "I quit.". [laughter]. >> They never say that. They say, "You know. what? We have to just go back to the. drawing board. I have to talk to my. coach. I have to go look back at the. videos to kind of see where I went.

wrong. >> Yes. Because the failure and the wrong. is the how you're going to move forward. >> It's how you're going to move forward. >> And you not only move forward, I've got. another heavy freaking medal. Talk to me. about this one. This is a big gold medal. for the 100 meters. And this one's. really important to you. >> This is from 2019. Why is this the medal. that you care about the most? >> 2019 in Doha after I had my son. I. remember when I got pregnant in 2017, I.

was so I was scared. I was nervous. And. here's why I was scared and I was. nervous because here comes those little. critics that think they know everything. that comes and they tell you, "Oh, having a baby will just ruin your. career. Oh, having a baby is not good. for a woman in the sport right now. Oh, having a baby and you're just going to. be turning 30. I think you should pack. it up. But having my son deepened my purpose,

right? My son changed my outlook. because I understood in that moment that. my son didn't need me to sacrifice my. career. He didn't need me to do that. Instead, he needs to see me chasing my. dreams so he knows he has the permission. to chase his. >> So, when I got to the World Championship.

in 2019, I was a mom of a beautiful. 2-year-old boy. Can you put into context. for the person who's listening who may. not really know the world of elite track. and field just like how many other. global champions. have dominated globally after having a. baby? How many women? >> Probably two. >> And you're one of them. >> And I'm one of them. Probably two or. three. Not at all. Well, it is typically.

the norm that once you become a mom, your track and field career, at least. sprinting at this worldrenown level, it's basically hang up. >> It becomes difficult. And so when I it. was important for me to continue because. I knew that the impact that this would. have and just what it would mean for the. sport in general was incredible. But not. just for the sport, but for me because.

this is me now understanding that as. women, we have to learn to evolve. And there's. always a conversation about our age. There's always a conversation about us. having kids. It's there's always a. conversation. See, she's too old. She's. a mom. Oh, she needs There's always a. conversation. But your conversation is. not my reality. So when I went to the. 2019 World Championship, I was ready.

because I knew the world was depending. on me showing them that motherhood. didn't diminish me as an athlete or as a. woman, but instead it elevated me. because now I stood at the line and I. knew I was championing a cause for that. woman who is probably beside me who. wants to have a child but was afraid. because of what it means for her career. And we've all been there where we've.

been told, hey, you can't have a kid. because of your career. You're going to. sacrifice. And I got to that line. And I. remember running. I ran 107. I think it. was 1075. And I screamed. I I was out of it, right? I There was I did a fist like I. was strong. I remember going for my son. who was in the stands and I brought him. on the track and we were celebrating. that moment together because I want my.

son to look back at those videos and. understand that. I in that moment I chose him. >> right I'm walking alongside him he. didn't stop me from chasing my dreams he. helped me to to achieve that dream to, you know, to to to get in that moment. and to understand our greatest comebacks.

are usually born from what people. consider failures. Because many persons thought, I would. just quit and go be a mom, but why can't. I be both? Why can't I be a mom and be a. sprinter and an excellent sprinter? There's not I think as women we have to. learn. to be selfish. There's nothing wrong with wanting to. two things. There's nothing wrong with.

wanting to be a mom and wanting to have. the success of being an athlete. And. that's why that medal is so important to. me because I chose myself and I chose my. son and we're going to figure it out. because balance is harmony and we exist. in the same space. Well, I love that you said that. the outside world has a lot to say about. especially women. >> and what your place is and when you're.

relevant, when you're not, what you can. do, what you can't do. And also this. messaging that if you choose to be two. things or three things at the same time. that somehow it means you're going to be. lousy at all of them. I know. And why is. that? >> I honestly don't know. Because as you're. really eloquently reminding us, you get. to decide. >> I get to decide. >> You get to decide what it means to.

choose being a mom and being a sprinter. at a worldrenowned level. You get to. decide that it is the most powerful. example that you can provide to your son. of what it looks like to go after. something. And that by deciding for. yourself, not listening to the outside. world, not looking around the person. here or the person over there, but. >> right in here, >> right here, >> what is it that I want? What are my. standards? You change the game you're. playing.

>> You change the game. Yes. And that's the. important thing because guess what? Now. you leave an example for the next woman. who is coming who decides, "All right, I'm going to have my baby. I can get. back to sprinting or I can go run here. I can do that because Shelan did it, so. I can do it.". >> Yes. So the 2019 medal really proved, okay, you can be a mom and you can. compete at a global level and win. Talk. to me about the win in 2022. So, this is.

a this is a super cool looking metal. >> Yes, that's 2022. I was 35 years old. >> Now, that seems young to me cuz I'm 57, but that's young. Yes. Like I like I. like you say that like I'm like do do. most. >> in the track world as a woman. People. think 28 is old. >> Really? >> Yeah. >> So, you're like a grandma out there. basically. >> My grandma at the sport. >> Okay. So, so 35 is like you're all you. should be retired kind of situation.

>> And usually a lot of female athletes at. that age did retire. >> Okay. >> A lot of them did because for them they. feel like they had to ask for some, not. all. Y. >> for some they felt like they needed to. ask people permission to chase their. dreams. >> They felt like they needed somebody. else's opinion on when it is that they. should tap out. I needed nobody's. permission but my own. As I said in the.

in before I said greater is he that is. in me than he that is in the world. There is absolutely no fear in love. because perfect love cast out fear. I. love what I do. I don't fear it. I love. it. There's a sense of boldness when I. step to the line and when I'm chasing. something because here's what's going to. happen. It's mine. I'm not taking. anybody's spot. And if you want it, you. have to come for it. If you I This is.

important to hear. If you want it, you. have to come for it. >> Yeah. >> I would love to have you put us at the. line. You're 35. >> Yeah. 35. There are a lot of 20 year. olds in the line. >> Well, you're not looking left or right. is what I understand. >> Listen, I'm not looking left or right. And I get my age is irrelevant at the. line. >> Your age is irrelevant. Your age is. irrelevant at the line. Your age is. irrelevant. in success. Irrelevant.

Nobody when you get to the line to win. is thinking about your age. Nobody's thinking about your age. >> except for the commentators like, "Okay, so there is 35year-old 35year-old. No. man, no woman has ever won a title at. this age. Thank god you're not hearing. me cuz they're like, "Okay, she's her. nails look amazing and she's in the. blocks and I know she's saying the. prayer right now, but no man or woman. has ever won at the age of 35. We're.

watching Shelley and what's the. overunder [laughter] on this bet right. now?" Right. >> Yeah, but you're not hearing that. >> I'm not I'm not hearing. >> See, maybe the problem for a lot of. people is they're listening to the. announcers calling the play versus. actually. >> voice should be the loudest voice in the. room. as I said earlier. So what do you. other than the prayer? What do you say. to yourself though? Because you do know. Jesus that I'm 15 years older than these. people. >> I'm saying to myself, my confidence come from my work.

When I stand at the line to compete, I. worked. I trained hard. I sacrificed. When I get. there, I'm ready. If you're going to. beat me, you just have to beat me on the. day. I'm not afraid of anybody, right? Because what's the most that's. going to happen? You're going to win or. you're going to lose. What's going to happen? Will the world. end? No. You'll get another chance. And. so what? I'm 35 is a fact. You can't.

change a fact. Why am I debating or. arguing with people that stating fact? They said I'm 35. I am 35. And. >> what And what do you want me to do about. it? I can't do anything about it. So. when I get to the line, I'm not thinking. about my age. I'm thinking about the. work. I'm thinking about the cues I'm. telling myself. I'm thinking about the. visualization. I'm thinking about my. past wins. Because you have to rely. because your past wins tell you in that. moment what you can do.

Those are the experiences and things I'm. telling myself when I get to the line. I'm telling myself lower at the block. I'm telling myself to drive powerful. Stay low. Get to 30. Relax upright. Hit. the ground hard. Stay focused. Breathe. Swing. Get to the line. Don't panic. You think the 100 meter is an hour. It's. not. It's just 10 seconds. But the.

amount of things that you can tell. yourself in that moment, I have no time. to be thinking about the commentator or. what anybody else is thinking. Tell us about that win because that is. like it was probably the happiest moment. of my my entire career. I was just on a. high because I came in running a lot of. 10 sixes. So I was confident. I was. there. I was ready. The atmosphere was. good. was in Eugene and everybody knows.

that track town in Eugene is just crazy. They know what's happening. It's hot and. you know as Jamaicans we love the heat. and it's hot and we're there and I'm. ready and I'm like listen. my moment. You have to seize the moment. You can't let the moment be bigger than. you. >> Okay, let's talk about that. What does. that mean? >> For a lot of persons, they get to their. moment and they start thinking, "Oh my. god, the moment." And it overwhelms them. till it stifles them. >> It stifles their performance. The moment.

is the moment. You're there, but you are. the moment. >> and you have to understand that you are. the moment. The moment is the moment. It. is what it is. It's not going to change. Everybody know it's the world. championship. Everybody know you're. trying to chase a gold medal. But you. can't let that moment be your moment. You are the moment. What you bring to. the table is your moment. the work that. you did a couple months before you got. there. It's your moment. That's what is.

important. So, I wasn't going to be. stifled by the lights because a lot of. persons, they they're crippled by the. lights. The light is the light. I can't move it. I can't move the stands. I can't move. the crowd. But I what I can do is tune. them out. They're not going to help me. I hear you. When they call my name and. they say in lane five, Shelly and FZ. from Jamaica, Shel and Fz a prize, I go, "Yay!" And I'm locked in.

You have to learn. to be locked in to ignore the lights cuz. the lights won't change unless. it suddenly goes dark. It won't change. >> So, I get to the line. I'm happy. I'm. ready. I am just focused on all the. races that I've executed before. That's. why important that you remember at any. moment. Go back to the moments you win. When days are hard, go back to the.

moments that you have won. Rely on those. moments cuz those moments are going to. help you. Those moments are going to. help you be confident. >> So, did you have to put a little padding. under your big toe? at that I'm going to. say [laughter] this in 2022 in 2017 when. I had my son. >> my toe got a 80% better just I was. scheduled to do a surgery the January of. 2018 on my toe until I found out I was.

pregnant and I'm glad that that happened. because here's why if I had done the. surgery there would be no power in my. toe. would be almost like putty or you know. >> glue glue. >> because those two bones are responsible. for power. If you remove them, there's. nothing there. So you're you get no. power from driving out the blocks. So. maybe so I when I say my son saved my.

career, I mean it with my entire being. because I took the time off, >> I got the rest. I was able to recoup. And I'm going to also say this is. important. Rest and recovery is just as. important as the training. Nobody shows up and win on an empty. tank. You have to be refueled and that's. why rest and recovery is also very.

important. What would you say to the person who is. looking at a goal? Maybe they've. leaned in a little as they're listening. and they're, "Okay, I'm going to decide. I'm I'm going to decide. I'm going to. launch that business. I'm going to find. love after divorce. I'm going to go back. to school in my 50s. Um, I'm going to go. to college, but nobody in my family's. gone to college." And then that doubt. starts to creep in and you start saying.

to yourself, "I can't do that. No one's ever. accomplished that. Almost like you. become the commentator. >> doubting yourself. Stop entertaining the voices in your. head that tell you to play small. You. have to stop entertaining those voices. The voices that say, "Oh, girl, this too. big for you. Girl, no. This not worth.

it. Oh, leave that one alone. We can't. go for the next one." And they tell you. the next one. So you have to stop. entertaining the voices in your head. >> that tell you to play small and also. stop negotiating your mornings. >> What do you mean? >> So when you get up in the morning, you. decide, all right, I'm going to attack. the goal. You start to, oh, maybe I'll. do it next year. Oh, maybe I do it next. week. Oh, can I just put it off today. and do it tomorrow? No. Stop. negotiating. Just do it. Literally get.

up, decide, and commit. You have to commit. So that voice in. your head that's telling you, "Oh, girl, this is too big. I can't do it.". Everything changes. downstream when things upstream are done. right. Say it again. Everything changes. downstream when upstream. is done right. So up here your mind.

when you start thinking and stop. negotiating and stop listening to that. small voice that tells you okay you. can't do it it's too big it's impossible. it converts. >> Yes. >> But when you start telling yourself this. is mine. I'm ready. I'm gifted. I'm I have purpose. It's going to work out. I'm strong. I'm. powerful. it trickles down.

>> and everywhere in your body starts to. respond to what you're telling yourself. in your mind. So you have to start. saying to yourself, I can. I will. I must. This is mine. I'm. ready. I'm fit. I'm focused. This will all work. out. This is just a small hiccup. I have. this. You got this. That's how you need.

to start negotiating in the mornings. You know, one of the things about you. that you've really had to deal with in. your career is pressure. >> and managing pressure and showing up. under pressure and not allowing the. pressure to break you. And right now, um, I know that the person listening. probably feels a lot of pressure. You. know, when we asked listeners in 194.

countries basically how they're feeling. right now, what they're struggling with, what their goals are, the number one. word that we heard was actually. exhausted. >> And exhaustion comes because you feel a. lot of pressure. You know what I'm. saying? And so if the person's dealing. with pressure at work or pressure in the. relationship or pressure financially, what how do you handle pressure in your. life? Pressure is a privilege. It means you're. made for more. It means that someone.

believes in you. Somebody thinks that. you have more to give that including. yourself. So pressure is a privilege. I. I'll leave a Jamaican saying where it. says nobody stones green mangoes. >> Nobody stole green. >> Nobody stones green mango. >> Stones green mangoes. They're not ripe. They're not [laughter] ripe. >> Exactly. So look at it that way. Because. you feel that pressure, it means that. you have a gift. You have something.

that's waiting to come out. >> So you're feeling that pressure. And the. only reason why sometimes you feel that. pressure or that pressure expands is. because you are living in the past and. the future at the same time. You can't. go back to tomorrow. There's nothing. there. You have to compete where your feet are. Wherever you stand is where you compete. You cannot allow yourself to be in a.

moment where you're thinking about the. past. Then you're thinking about the. future. Your brain doesn't know what's. happening. You're you're stifling your. brain. the past, the things or the mistakes or. whatever it is that have happened. before. That pressure expands when you feel like. you're trying to control what already. happened. It's gone. So, you need to now look at the future. And how you do things like that is be. intentional.

You have to learn to breathe. Center yourself. Find your center. Go. back to your why. Go back to the the reason you started. cuz those are the things you can. control. You can't control what anybody. else is say or what happened a year ago. or 7 months ago. You can't control that. So why are you there? Why are you living. there? It's gone. You know what's coming the future and.

you have to prepare for that. So you. can't add any pressure to yourself by. living in the past and the future at the. same time. That's when you're going to. be feeling pressure. But look at. pressure as a privilege. It means that. you have something. You have a gift. You. have more. Cuz nobody who is chasing. nothing. I've never heard anybody say. that's doing anything that says or no. absolutely nothing says I feel. pressured.

Have you ever heard it? If somebody sits. in this room. doing nothing every day just doing. nothing, they can't feel pressured. Are. you doing anything to feel pressured? No. But for the person who's chasing. something and wants to start something. and that person who sits you know in. their room or in their car who knows. that listen I have this gift. I have. this purpose and I want it to be. realized but you are the one that's.

holding yourself back. That's the. pressure. You have to get rid of it. >> I needed you in 2008. I know you were. busy winning gold medals, >> but in 2008 I was under such devastating. financial pressure. and. what you just laid out explains why I. was stuck for so long. >> Mhm. Because when you cannot put food on. the table or gas in the tank of the car. and you have three kids and leans on the.

house and you're pissed off at your. husband and you've lost your job, you. spend a lot of time thinking about all. the mistakes in the past, which makes. the financial pressure in the moment. bigger. And you said you have to stop. looking backwards. You've got to compete. where your feet are. >> and you've got to look to the future. And what's interesting is I suffered and. I. just oh my god I I was I I said I was.

about to say I verbally abused my. husband for a year because I was so. scared and angry that all I did was. scream at that poor man. And. it wasn't until I did the first thing. you told us to in this conversation. today. I decided I decided that I needed. to make a change. I decided that I. needed to stop looking around at. everybody else and I needed to stop.

looking at my husband to fix this. And I. decided my purpose was to make money. My. purpose was to save the house. My. purpose was to figure out how the heck. we were going to pay off this debt. And. once I decided and I locked into a. future where I felt like I could be. proud of myself and I could pay my. bills, >> now I have a race to run. >> Now you have a race to run. >> And the second you do that, yeah, the. pressure is still there, but it feels.

different. It feels like it almost is. behind you pushing you versus pressure. around you consuming. you. consuming just pressing in and you. feel like you're being stifled. >> But that pressure behind you is a fuel. >> Yes. >> That pressure behind you becomes a push. >> Yes. >> Because that pressure tells you that. okay, I'm on the right path. >> and somebody somewhere, whether it's the.

kids, believes in me. >> and depending on me to get there. They. see more in me. They see a future with. me. >> Yes. And then you start to understand. that, okay, I'm on the right path. Pressure is good. >> when it's behind you. I didn't like it. when it was in my face cuz [laughter] it. was in my face for a while. >> When it's behind you, but that pressure. can expand if you're fighting two wars, one in the past and one in the future. I. don't want to fight the one in the past. cuz you can't go back.

>> It's gone. You can learn from it, >> but it's gone. And there are a lot of. persons who are stuck where they are. because they are still feeling that. pressure from whether past mistakes, past failures, past relationships. They're still there, but you're not. there. You're already here in the. future. So, you have to compete here. You can't go back there.

You right here. When we get to the line, the starting line, that's where we. compete there. >> Oh my god. Do you know how many people, and I would put myself in this bucket, spend so much of their lives rerunning. races they lost in the past, >> running, running, running, running, running, running, and you can't get it. back. >> Versus understanding there's a new race. to run. There's a new line to step up. to. >> Every day there's a new race. Every day.

you just have to show up for it. Every day there is a new race. You have. to show up for it. Shellanne, if the person listening. takes just one action out of all of the. wisdom that you've poured into us, as. soon as they're done listening to this, what do you think the most important. thing to do is? >> I think the most important thing to do, Mel, is what you said earlier. Decide.

You have to decide because we can. And. in that decision, the reason why we are. here and you are here is because you're. still seeking. >> You're still listening because you're. still seeking. You still want something. So you have to decide and commit to your. greatest life yet. You have to decide. You can listen to everything. You can. write down everything and you can have. the vision board and you can have the. book that you're writing your goals, but.

until you make that decision to start or. to do something different, you're wasting time. You're wasting. time. You have to decide. Like there's. just no two way about it. There are a. lot of persons who are sitting at home. and they have written down that business. plan and I'm going to start this. business. I'm going to do this. I'm. going to, you know, end this friendship. or this relationship that's not going.

anywhere. It's eating me. And they have. yet to make the decision or fully a lot. of them make half decision. I'm going to. do it tomorrow. I'm going to do it next. year. Decide now. Commit now. Shellanne, what are your parting words? My parting words would have to be you. and I, we're not built for average. We're built for extraordinary.

extraordinary things. I've said earlier, you have to be and. become extraordinary. Extraordinary now and extraordinary to. come. [clears throat]. So all those things that you have told. yourself, the unhealthy things that you. have told yourself before, get rid of. it. We're not made to play small. You. have to expand your mind, expand, you. know, your your territory. You have to. see yourself being big, not average, not.

small, but big. Somebody who have more a. lot more untapped potential that's. waiting to expand. And I and not only me. but you have to give yourself. permission. You have to give yourself permission to. chase the dream. You have to give. yourself permission to understand that. you carry excellence. You carry we all carry cuz we are.

created with it. We have purpose. We. have plans. We have all of it. And you. have to mold those things together and. create a life that ex that is. extraordinary. Shelley, you are extraordinary. Thank you. >> You literally blew me away. And there's. something about being in your presence. that I just want to sprint out of here. I don't even really know where I'm. [laughter] going right now, but I just. feel like I Okay, let's run a race.

>> Let's win. Let's win. >> Let's win. >> No, thank you. Thank you. Thank you for. being you, for taking the time to come. here and to pour into me and to the. person that is listening. I know this. conversation is going to ripple around. the world and is going to be shared in. family group chats and among friends and. coaches are going to send it to teams. You are such a gift. >> Thank you. I appreciate that, Mel. This.

was great. >> Thank you. Well, you're great. >> Thank you. And I also want to thank you. as you heard Shell Anne say to you, you. are not average. You are extraordinary. And everything that she poured into you, you can feel it in your bones. Even. those two little bones in your big toe, you could feel it that she believes in. you. She believes you're extraordinary. But you got to decide. You got the tools. and the encouragement and the road map.

today for crying out loud. decide to do. something with it. Step up to the line. and run that race. And in case no one. else tells you today as your friend, I. am going to tell you that I love you and. I believe in you and I believe in your. ability to create a better life and just. follow everything you just heard and you. will build an extraordinary one. All. right, I'll see you in the very next. episode. I'll welcome you in the moment. you [music] hit play. And thank you for. watching all the way to the end. I love.

being here with you on YouTube and I. know you're thinking, "Okay, what should. I watch next?" You are going to love. this [music] video and I will welcome. you in the moment you hit play.