Ep 524 - Tricker Treat (feat. Steve Gerben & Chris O'Connor)

wow wow. [Music]. West and we're starting now hello. everybody we're back the three of us I. guess mck couldn't make it no he working. like crazy know yeah busy as hell yeah. he's extreme I don't know how he's doing. what he's doing no he's doing a little. bit of everything there's he's now at.

that point where he can't get to always. somebody that needs something yeah which. that could be trouble cuz then you're. going to have to handle a. lot. oh and then office. Dwight and then Dwight gets his dick. sucked constantly and uh he becomes the. boss and is really cool and everyone. thinks he's. cool I did a cool thing I went and got a. mask made you got a oh [ __ ] yeah for the. show [ __ ] silicone put on yeah nice.

for when I blow your [ __ ] head off. exactly we want to give me that. Terminator eye um how was that that. sucks uh it wasn't it wasn't that bad it. was kind of nice and also my my dad. wound up being like 10 minutes away they. pulled my dad out of retirement what do. you mean yeah my dad retired from. engineering and then oh and he was. working yeah he was working today so you. got to see your father yeah yeah I got. to have a little meal with him which was. nice we ate hot dogs you and your dad. ate hot dogs together yeah yeah we had. shared a hot dog yeah it was nice and.

some cheese. curds talked about Minor League or not. minor league but like youth league. hockey for a little bit talk about kids. and ate hot dogs that's a good day it's. a great day where did you guys eat the. park no we went to this place called. destination dog you went to his hot dog. specific restaurant yeah yeah that's. nice yeah it was great I'm not a big dog. guy oh these are good hot dogs I [ __ ]. hate hot dogs what do you mean I just. hate I obvious say I'm I'm munching yeah.

I'll grow up with the best but hot dog I. just [ __ ] hate hot dogs no good hot. they're disgusting well they are you're. a terrible Ally in this all you. literally you eat [ __ ] chicken. fingers no I which by the way chicken. fingers obviously rule yeah yeah yeah. but uh no it's more grilled chicken and. rice and uh broccoli now my diet affects. how I feel of course yeah yeah yeah so. are you are you bulking up or is there. is strateg okay yeah I did think I.

because I did and I I started to tell. you this yeah and then I stopped but I. think I unlocked a new power source in. the golf is that the where this kept. power swing story was going yeah yeah. there was more to that story no there. wasn't it wasn't I wanted that to be. there could have been that needed to be. done that was one of the worst stories. I've ever heard in my life well I don't. think it was you should tell everybody. on the podt I don't want to everybody. just going to make fun of me no one's. going to make fun of you.

well this is the so we're in the middle. of us filming which is it's long and. then Steve's like oh I got I saw him. smiling he saw me that's all it was by. the way I was literally I I the tiniest. little ring literally looking at the. floor. gone he's imagining how bad the story is. going to go yes but also wanting to say. it yeah yeah desperately wanting to say. it yeah and the story was you did a golf.

ball far well so I I I played both days. played Saturday and Sunday this is. you're [ __ ] so tired when we're. filming no I didn't know it energizes me. no it doesn't don't do that no it. doesn't I need it otherwise I would have. been more tired we are at risk of losing. you to injury you're trying to go for. the long ball you trying to go for the. long ball you were you were barely. making it the other day that yesterday. God damn well we all got sick from from.

one of the one of yeah it spread around. yeah yeah one of the guest stars yeah. maybe it's tough to blame him fair. enough yeah it could have come from. anywhere regardless you're in close. quarters with a bunch of people. breathing it's coming from me I'm we'll. see dude I'm yeah I'm a suspect I had it. yeah yeah I had something going on you. brought it. in but anyway he saw me smile I had to. tell the story which is just that I you.

know had this feel in my back swing. let's also I know you're trying to get. to this incredible story but let's make. sure everyone knows this is out of. [ __ ] nowhere this isn't like we were. talking about golf we were talking about. anything this is just all. right I think about it a lot this is a. silent. room we were pretty quiet yeah but we. were also you know we we we see each. other every day there's a limited amount. of stuff to talk about so I had this. sort thing to talk to you about it's. kind of the Highlight let's here so uh I.

made a few swing changes and then got. this feel that gave me a lot more coil. in my back swing and I hit a bomb like. you know I hit a couple bombs frankly. coming down the home stretch yes and my. playing partner you know was like damn. you cleared the bunker into the wind and. I was. like I never would have done that it's a. good go yeah that's it that's that's the. feeling but see this is the thing I. think it's only most people who don't.

care about golf it's whatever if you. love golf that that feeling of. connecting with the drive and watching. the ball sail it's just it it's whatever. you're supposed to feel when you listen. to Beethoven it's just this thing and I. I got to feel that and I love it it is. great and another we were feeling that a. little bit at Top Golf yeah if you hit. the golf ball far it's fun yeah yeah to. have somebody point it. out you pumped that and I got I did pump. it and then I had 80 yards left I had a.

perfect ADR day fell shot made the putt. birdie it played a you a birdie I did. have a birdie nice thanks that's good. that was my boring ass story that I. thought of and then thought of his. response to it and then of course I have. to tell it so just walk the. plank that was uh I do really want to. get good at. golf be fun golfing would be fun yeah. unless you're golfing with Steve and his. buddies dead clean.

sober buddies enjoying the sport hitting. a [ __ ] 120 sober that [ __ ] blows. dude although you said you hit it in the. 80s right uh 86 on Sund was that the day. with the birdie yeah yeah yeah you're. were feeling it I was feeling it [ __ ]. yeah how'd you feel when you got home. how' you feel when you got home your. girlfriend catch the business bucks what. did your girlfriend get the. business. Inc all right what was that I shouldn't. have asked yeah you carry it over do I.

carry what over the confidence of a good. golf game into the yes but I don't but I. don't carry over the bad stuff do you. don't I don't car with the I don't. believe that. either just [ __ ] lies dude you you. don't take it out on her if you have a. bad day no come here no. but what these golf stories make me. really miss Matt's [ __ ] dream. stories I'll listen to Matt's dream. stories every day.

ick I had some bad dreams last night you. had some dreams some really B I had a. really bad dream Miss dream stories I. cuz we we went out and we had some. dinner last night and I went home but. then in my dream we stayed out and got. [ __ ] up that's fun yeah yeah we got. really [ __ ] up might be the ticket. that might be like you're actually. sleeping in your. head I was I was but then I got so. shitfaced somehow I woke up in my. parents house uh and in a drunken stuper.

I had like started like a a variety of. puzzles all over the floors of my. parents house and I woke up and I was. like I don't know how I'm going to. explain yeah what happened last night. and. like what the [ __ ] were you doing you. kept making puzzles all over the like. what the [ __ ] is wrong with you yeah. sure so how about the golf yeah golf. better than that cuz it happened in.

reality there you go it really [ __ ] me. up I'm not going to lie the puzzle thing. yeah. yeah my imaginary debauch tonight we had. a nice night we did have we had a. wonderful night I stood my ground you. did coward I did I did coward I wanted. to get to sleep so I could get [ __ ] to. dinner with our Our Ladies and we had. nice dinner but we were discussing. Halloween costumes okay of course the. ladies are they want to go as bloody. whatever sure and it's.

like you. know why not not do that yeah it's cool. when I wasn't dating you yeah yeah but. now you know yeah cover it up a little. I'm sitting there I'm in the middle of. I'm battling both girlfriends okay this. one silent Judas really dened me Peter. at Jud that was Peter I I said at the. table I would like to get some sleep. tonight I do not want to open this can. of worms.

I think that's fair what do you think of. that I'm in the trenches doing battle he. even said I appreciate what you're. doing wow which was a mistake so what do. you actually think though it did come. back to haunt. me not in the moment that was a slow. burn that fight yeah yeah so what do you. actually. think um I like when other people's. girlfriends are dressed [ __ ] that's. sure yeah but Chris what do you actually. think do iend yeah and you were saying. no I was saying that we're going to have. a Halloween party and it's going to be a. bunch of [ __ ] people from my.

work and half of them are 40 you know. this is this is not the time yeah I. think it's going to with you so then I'm. saying what what is your opinion yeah I. think it's going to wind up being like a. bunch of just like our friends boozing. and like being dressed super [ __ ] is. going to be a little weird yeah yeah but. that's all yeah yeah I agree so that's. that's what I genuinely think you can't. get in that argument with a woman the. other side of that look like.

what is the other side what is their. argument yeah that you're an insecure. controlling [ __ ]. [ __ ] that's the argument which is which. is tough to you can't break out of it. you got to I don't fine no I think. that's the big missile in Mario I don't. I I I I would disagree with that. argument I would say it's not about. being insecure it's about making my. friends maybe a little uncomfortable cuz. they don't want to look at you sexually. because me their friend is is dating you.

yeah but yet you're sort of forcing. you're going you're going to Sharia. Sharia law on. this you're going You're M you're M. let's cover you up a little no and I. agree no I'm not saying because you're. mine I'm saying enemy is my friend I'm. saying because my yeah my friends it's. like they yeah don't give Brian 6 a. boner at the Halloween. right. right but yeah that's that's never an. argument you can win I've been down this. road obviously we all have well cuz you. get you once you start getting to.

specifically like how long or short a. skirt you're just you're I did that at. the table I was like stop me stop me. where the dress up your knee tell me. where the dress stops and if you know. when you say it like I'm saying right. now it does come off a little bit. controlling and abusive but it was not. it was a fun friendly conversation that. ended up not being friendly but at first. seemed friendly I was trying to suggest. a variety of costumes that may be you. know didn't require I was going to go as.

Frankenstein yeah Bride of Frankenstein. yeah it's like a turtleneck full sleeves. yeah now that was passed upon Princess. Leia Princess Leia was nice you wanted. to Hillary Clinton princess Le yeah I. want Cloud cities Princess Leia slave. Leia was was what was settled upon was. just metal bikini Princess Leia. was that was an idea it was just like no. yeah it's be 40° Don't Miss Frizzle was.

in the mix I was like big that's a big. dress I knew where that was going the. scuba diving episode they editorialized. Miss Frizzle a little. bit yeah and what are you you're you're. still playing on the referee costume no. no because I don't I don't I'm shy and I. know that that doesn't sound I was. thinking about this you're shy man yeah. I am shy and I think to make this. costume funny when the idea behind the. costume was I'd be like uh why are you. laughing uh nothing nothing keep going.

okay we'll come back to that okay uh the. idea behind the costume is of an NFL. referee I do have like a little mini. yeah it's throwing party fils you're. right and I'm hitting people at the flag. and calling party fouls yes now I will. say this has been done it has it's. probably for 30 years okay then it's. original that's it's not it's original. to you but I'm not going to do it. because again I just don't have the. frankly balls to like go around and I. think you do no I don't well this [ __ ]. me me cuz I bought a referee outfit and.

I was going to be wearing it when you. got there no are you serious you're. going to be so funny with it was Chris's. idea to get a white hat so I'd be the. head official for I could tell you what. to. do you thought of. this for a white hat and I was like I. just want a regular one megalomaniac. you're a power hungry Pig Power hungry. pig that's saw you looking at me you. know it's just we were laughing so hard. last night if you showed up in the black. just picking up Flags going there's no.

flag on. the. overruled I literally have it in my. checkout thing I think I'm just going to. come as like uh Ben Franklin or. something that's not bad yeah that's. pretty good yeah it's good it's a good. way to mix in the spectacles oh yeah we. get some glasses on yeah so yeah I. thought of that I thought that there was. a George Washington one on Amazon yeah. but then I felt like that might be kind. of CUNY to invite people to your house. and then wear a [ __ ] General's.

uniform be like welcome to my party I'm. the coolest guy of all time I'm the most. powerful man ever I invented America you. know I like I like the idea of going. all revolutionary yeah all ever. revolutionary clothing I like it too. 1770s what were you laughing at earlier. I was laughing at that. oh picking up the flag would picking up. the flag is so funny in all fairness I I. did I saw that referee it's not like an.

original thought I had I was in Manny. youngk and this was like this is going. back 15 years and you thought of it then. no A guy ran down the street it was like. oh you saw someone do it he heled a guy. in a Spider-Man costume with a flag 15. yards from being an f and it was just so. funny ker yeah it was back when you. could say. it we're bringing those back dude. it's.

coming unless Chris has anything to say. about it 30 days you [ __ ] what are. you talking about you know what I'm. talking about I know what you're going. to do you know we're on the same side of. that issue how many votes are you going. to put in this year um you got about. 20,000 last year yeah yeah I'm going to. request I've requested 20 the whole. downstairs is full of ballot yeah I'm. filling them out cat's name putting one. in for May nice that's funny but hey. that was so crazy at the show yeah oh.

yeah Chris standing up there Chris K the. show was sick show wases show was that. was the coolest thing ever watching you. walk out in that place yep it's. uncomfortable it's too cool if I mean. from our advantage the way that people. saw you moving yeah in the beginning and. just started like rising up yeah that. was crazy it was so. sick yeah I had fun it was real to watch.

you were right you told me that the. round is better. way than a stage cuz all the sound hits. you at the same time yeah sometimes it. can trick you you're like God damn I'm. killing and then you get off stage and. people like that was that was good I. thought how do you think it. went dude that bothers me so much how do. you think it went yeah how did you feel. about it I thought it was the best night. of my life I guess I was. wrong yeah that was awesome that was a. fun [ __ ] night that was great then. little gerby babies I got to meet a.

pitcher yeah that was awesome you guys. got to discuss pitching from the mound. yeah and then one of your buddies sold. him like a gas tank. what you one of your one of your buddies. that was there yeah from home yeah yeah. apparently like um made a business deal. with a picture from the Phillies yeah. yeah nice yeah he was they were talking. like he was they were just talking for a. while and St was talking about going on. some big drive and uh he was like oh. you're going to need a bigger tank for.

that you're going need a bigger T gas. tank I'll hook it. up for oh oh driving truck yeah yeah. yeah yeah yeah he was one of the guys. that was a mechanic at armore Ed nice. yeah it was awesome I don't know if we. should cut that out no that's totally. fine look at that [ __ ] cat dude what. are you looking at yeah that's fired up. fir that's nice yeah oh oh where's your. gay cat at my gay house.

is it doing anything gay May's an outdo. yeah she an Outdoorsman oh she's indoor. outdoor she got like a whole backyard. made our. garden and uh this guy needs to go. outside very badly they keep him in he's. a giant he can't he'd be a [ __ ]. problem out there he he'd get [ __ ] up. by the groundhog outside would decimate. him no he could run away from a. groundhog he thinks he's ready for. outside but he's not you guys are. ruining This Boy's Life No all he has to.

do is he has a chair to play with let. him go outside he's a big dog all day he. wants to go outside he's full just yeah. jamus is the best. ever let him. out I could watch that all day instead. of podcasting I could watch Chris play. with the. cat what time you got to be in early. tomorrow I do what time do you have to. go in tomorrow uh I think 6:45 oh yeah.

that's what time are you 11: dang yes. brother I'm still going to try and go to. the Y T night and work out really yeah. you've been working out during this I I. have yeah yeah occasionally i' did you. work out yesterday you better not have. no all right good no cuz I I that I. would have a problem with that yeah I. was under the weather yesterday sure. yeah thought you were going to die. little dizzy. spell we were laughing so hard last. night cuz your face like you lost all. your blood in your face your face was. ghostly what and you had that [ __ ] on I.

got so scared at one point you looked at. me. like and I was like holy like I was even. watching you during a scene being like. he's going to hate the way this one. comes out he's going to look [ __ ]. terrifying I don't know if anybody's had. this where you're just like your hearing. cuts out and it's like pop and then and. that's normal I've had that happen. before and I was just and typically. standing up it happened when I was. sitting down and then I just got crazy. vertigo and I was like sitting next to. John like squeezing his arm. like scary it was scary yeah no and yeah.

then I then it was well it looked like. you it was because you were upset about. what you were wearing that's what made. it so funny it felt like seemed grp. about like the way you walked in it just. was like yeah yeah well it's a lot of. like uh first of all the wig is very hot. and then uh there it takes a long time. to put it on and a lot of like fussing. about it and you know some does that.

bother you I thought I thought you'd. like getting fussed over you love the. makeup chair bro yeah I'm not a big fan. of like all that cuz it's also like they. put in you know you've had it it's just. not the most comfortable thing but in. your hair it's you're constantly eating. fake hair it's in your mouth no it's not. even fake hair it's real hair yeah yeah. it's another person's hair yeah that. grosses you out. yes yeah it's disgusting what are you. talking about other people's hair in. your mouth of course yeah just it's. never really bothered me how often does.

that happen not a ton but if I get like. hair in the food I I just take it out. and keep it yeah I take it out I keep. eating it's some people will lose their. minds over that. stuff like the whole thing you would. would you I thought for sure you'd Fu. love the hair and makeup ah. no I don't know you love like the. photographers coming in I might be over. it I don't know I don't know I change I. I change I I didn't used to be a shy. person and you beat that out of me why.

you're great kidding I'm just kidding. I'm trying to make you less shy yeah no. I know you are you are trying my best to. let you I can show you the world you. would how great he would have killed it. well as far no no I don't have it yet. I'm working on. it you would have enjoyed it you would. have really enjoyed had fun yeah I had. fun watching you guys that was so cool. it really was yeah it really was and. even just you know you're like wow you. know we were dve like Julie and I were. driving down and we're just like driving.

that she's like there's like teams of. guys coming to watch us in a van. drinking beers and we we're like this is. all Shane like we are in Shane traffic. yeah yeah I got there and people were. tailgating and I was like oh [ __ ] that. was crowd's going to be [ __ ] out of. control and they weren't they they were. they were good good guys they were great. yeah I've been surprised by all the. shows I mean I haven't been to that many. but the ones that I have been in that. size close to that size everyone's like. in their seats and ready to go yeah it's.

crazy every do like a minor league. hockey arena in some small town dudes. get rally there's some fights up in the. balconies and [ __ ] yeah yeah you see. that that's fun a fight up in the. balcony yeah it's just oldtime hockey. it's fun that was the first first time I. ever saw that I remember when I was in. hockey camp in Toronto going into the. like whatever skating rink we were doing. this whatever at it was like a goalie. camp and there were just dudes fresh off.

of just beer league just and it was like. me and my dad walking in and they were. just they were shping at us and talking. [ __ ] and just crushing beers sitting on. the back of their cars and stuff aw. throwing beer cans at us it was crazy. sense two they can sense the Connecticut. dandies the Connecticut dandies are here. for. hockey that was that was the old Canada. that was a big wake up back the day oh. apparently they're still up there they. Patriots. yeah yeah I found.

him yeah they formed that big Wagon. Train yeah what else is going on. anything. cool unfortunately all the cool stuff is. like the show and that's so much cool. yeah yeah it's like 14 hours a day yeah. and then you're just GNA come home it's. true you've been good though in the show. oh really thank you so much man you been. good you haven't been grumpy on set yet. not really not really it was one day.

that was nothing there's sometimes. though like last year I think we'd be. done by now yeah basically yeah [ __ ] we. should have gone back with that what the. [ __ ] are we do it we had it we just do a. month yeah just get done like we did. last time we' be done with the we could. be. done just Churn it out we still have. [ __ ] forever yeah we do we've got a. long ways to go but I you have been less. grumpy you've been less grumpy hey I. think I don't think I was super grumpy.

last time you're a bit of a power hungry. Pig again power hungry. Pig you stopped saying that everybody's. going to think that's totally true no. one thinks No One Believes okay thank. God no they uh what was I say I mean I'm. not wrong. but oh what was I going to say you were. going to say this year's better no I was. going to yes I you know obviously biased. but we saw uh cut yeah it's I'm so. excited for everybody to see this yeah. yeah I really am I I know that that's.

like a thing that people say but boy is. this fun I think it has your I just like. your enthusiasm it's fun it's I would. never talk that way it's nice to hear. that okay yeah I'm not trying to be you. know I'm GNA get you on a late night TV. show this year I'm gonna pants you on. Jimmy F this that's F you know what I've. decided what I'm gonna do if you do that. I'm just gonna say compliments about you. that's effectively pantsing you I'm. going to be like you don't stop.

stop he put me in this show he's could. have been in any show he wanted trying. to you're going to make me cry. on that would be a good Revenge just. with your pants around your ankles just. complimenting you ever see that uh I. think it's Mark Summers and Bert. Reynolds on a late night show where. they I forget Mark Summers is like a. nickola it's literally you and me on a. okay he's like it starts he's he's. talking about his marriage and B Bert R. is like shut the [ __ ] up and he's like. me and my wife are still together and. the crowd's like oh and he like throws.

his water on him anyway they're getting. a fight I imagine Reynolds throws his. water on Mark Summers yeah and then. they're like all right fellas let's. settle those with the pie contest or. like they turn around and Pie each other. ber Reynolds hooks him in the face like. as hard as he can oh my God yeah it's. pretty crazy anyway that's what's going. to. happen and Mark suers is like a. hypochondriac isn't he probably. terrified of that pie. yeah I think he's like a real neat freak. how do you know about Mark Somers I met.

him once what yeah I tried to shake his. hand where' you oh is that how you came. up with that he blew by and your dad was. like he's he's afraid of germs the guy. from Nickelodeon doesn't hate you I met. him as an adult and I tried to shake his. hand where uh he did a show at good good. once nice actually no it wasn't yeah it. wasn't there it was at some other thing. one yeah yeah that is now a very famous. golf. channel good good oh yeah yeah YouTube. cuz it's yeah that's it I ruined that my.

bad hey gol damn it no we love golf okay. it's good Billy's talking about doing. Billy goes out there yeah I mean that. could really you know youit the. Clans golf's fun we all agree golf's fun. he's got a Cool vibe to him Billy yeah. yeah he's a cool guy cool clothes you. wish you could wear those cool clothes. of course I do you could wear those cool. clothes he's got the amount of necklaces. that I would like to wear I would I.

would like you to wear those necklaces i. s shaning a picture of me wearing the. Jewish one that we talked about last. time and oh I want to see it he was like. I'm going to kill. you you're not even Jewish no I know I. know you're fraud yeah when are you. going to get back into. Judaism like I said maybe deathbed I. don't know really you think you put up a. Hail Mary yes did you you did you got. like did you get the Mitzvah and all. that Stu yeah yeah all right so you've.

done all the things yeah you're in. the Chris is looking at the photo now. damn looks pretty good on you it does it. does make you look actually extremely. Jewish I I never think of you as Jewish. I responded with that. yeah I was like my bad that was a little. too. much yeah that's a good pro Israel like. yeah Twitter biop piic. and you are very proel.

X we're not that's too complicated for. me to have an opinion on I want. everybody to be. safe yep yeah World safety World. safety I'm on for that too yeah so like. how did the rest of uh Friday night. go after the show oh it was good just. kind of hung out yeah went to boners. drank some more Brian ran showed up that.

was sick yeah Brian Regan showed up that. was cool he's fantastic it was an. exciting time and then I realized I was. too drunk I got I got the wobbles a. little and I was like all right I need. to leave but I would still like to argue. with Chris in front of. everyone so I'd be like all right I'm. going to go home I got to go home and i'. be like Chris just admit Russian. collusion just admit collusion was wrong. just say it and I'm also [ __ ] up so I. took a bait line and good battle except. Chris was outnumbered 10 to one yeah wow.

I was bringing all Billy was there I got. to just summon Billy like Billy handle. this cuz I can't really talk Billy get. him Billy W up going I don't give a [ __ ]. about any of this uh it's interesting. cuz I called him on the way over here. and he was like Chris is a [ __ ] for. that in in your driveway that's what he. was saying about you oh that's so nasty. why would he say that cuz I was like. yeah I I got nothing you got got to give. me something to talk about yeah and he.

was like CEO of abami and Fitch is a. [ __ ] pedophile I like all right nice. I got. that I what else that almost goes. without saying uh yeah I guess it was. what's his name Lex Wexner was his money. guys. the same as Epstein I don't know oh yeah. W is he the Victoria Secret guy or. something. yeah well anyway the next saying that. the other day where is giz Lane Maxwell. no one knows say I was saying it cuz I. was listening to Tim Dylan oh yeah which.

is one of the best Listen to Tim Dylan. he's hilarious so. good I told you like the one thing I. think it was with um but let's go back. to the collusion thing though because. that was the other topic can you just. admit that that was kind of a false. narrative out no I stand by that you. think that was real uh well it depends. which version you think they were. accusing him of but I think everything. in the Muller report I think everything. dossier that ended up getting the. clintons got V for I don't stand by the.

but everything in the M report I stand. by but do you think it's okay for. political candidate to use the. intelligence agencies to accuse another. candidate of being a Russian spy and. then using that putting it in the media. and letting them talk about it for four. years unchecked with almost no edits no. [ __ ] sorry we made a mistakes it. didn't help that uh what's his name the. think that's okay Trump junr trump junr. I'm just wondering if you think that's. okay just you answer the question he.

admitted I actually grew up middle class. that's how you answer. questions you are. Cala no Trump Jr admitted it during the. campaign he said we we are Russ they. were like yeah they were like you guys. tried to meet with Russia to get dirt on. Hillary and he was he released the. emails oh they tried to or they did they. tried do yeah well they wound up not. being they wound up not having the. meeting oh that's good but so they. didn't do it Trump no no no no because. so wait he ended up not killing his wife.

so he is not a. murderer he end up not doing that crime. no no no. he yeah no they we're out of topics we. could just talk. politics or Steve's jacking off the. habits I don't have anything new about. the ja it's all right you don't have to. you can think of something new okay what. do you think about this whole russan. collusion thing here uh I you know don't. know nearly enough about it I think.

somebody was arrested though from hey if. somebody gets arrested then they're. definitely guilty that was another. argument but wasn't the person that was. claiming that there was Russian. collusion was actually colluding with. Russia yeah yeah there was a couple of. those crazy it's ridiculous yeah I don't. know they got yeah to me the most. alarming thing is the. um and not that I know nearly enough. about it but the prosecution of trump in.

New York. for trying to get a loan and claiming. that his building was worth more than. what I guess yeah it was the marago one. and the government was like that's worth. five million yeah marag there was I. guess there was a bun yeah I didn't see. the Maraga even though through my. understanding I don't keep off track. also ran own conveniently stopped paying. attention well how much you're the. little kid that quits when he's losing. in no no no I'm not you turn actually.

you were winning and you go all right. we're done turn it off turn it off Biden. won Trump say Trump's going to jail turn. the game off Biden did win you don't. think Biden won I think he did win yeah. I mean he won yeah you think there was. malfin who. knows do I think no I think there was. some some unrest in the country that. seemed to be beneficial to one side that. you know I will say this about think. about this fir up outwhere.

but I will say this about Trump I do the. thing that I really do like about Trump. is that if he he's kind of doing exactly. what you'd actually want a candidate to. do which. is which is. like. he's his campaign and all the stuff that. he does hasn't been affected At All by. like the like some of the trivial. [ __ ] that can normally nuke.

someone's Co campaign yeah and he is. like in spite of his party hating him. like for the most part just going to the. people and using them to obliterate any. who just disag yeah it's almost like a. democracy where the people the people. just disagree with everything else that. he's doing but it's like it is what you. want a guy it's what a politician I. guess yeah no I feel like I us his votes. I don't know no but it feels like. there's more deal.

making usually and then like the kind of. the powers that be sort of like a line. around a person and like and build them. up and funnel money into them versus. this really does feel like he's the. powers to be just get rid of the current. president and say you're out we're not. even going to have a primary you are the. president a vice president next man up. if the president's dead yeah yeah Welly. close yeah it's pretty close they're.

going to threaten what amendment is it. the 25th 26 what is the amendment where. the the president's. onfit uh 23rd 25th something 25 one they. I guess they apparently they threatened. him with that if he didn't agree to stop. running this year really and let Cala. run I have SE which is interesting. because he's still the President right. so I guess they didn't believe it he's. yeah who knows he's doing yeah I'm just. going to go with whoever Dick Cheney and. Liz channy. with you know yeah they brought us.

through the darkness before yeah they. picked us up out of 911 where are you. coward you going to let me do all this I. was I was on the whole you got there. little you toss one that. Wasing off the I wasn't even done I was. going to go to the hor Shark Tank guy oh. what's the sharkk tank guy he was like. if if we prosecute for people like this. there's New York's going to come to a. total. standstill cuz this is like common. practice Yeah like inflating the value.

of your property for loans and then. deflating them for taxes yeah and the. but the bank also ran their own whatever. you would call it appraisal of that. building so it wasn't even like they. just took what he said it's just what he. was saying yeah and they still gave him. a loan he paid it back and then you're. going to arrest him and that that feels. like maybe a political. persecution I don't know in a like real. scary way it is the hard part that I am.

dumb and don't know anything that's the. hard part that's also the real hard sure. there's somebody that's fun to argue. gives a [ __ ] they don't know anything. either they're listening to. this they're listening to dumb guys that. don't know anything yeah we could be on. some you never know that's just what I. feel like is the push back uh to. Democrats which is like this the idea. that you've got to let smart people just. handle it it's like but then you create. a precedent for or something that you. won't like down the road like for.

instance with Obama sort of the bombing. the indiscriminate bombing I. suppose everybody like there's that. Jewish boming indiscriminate bombings I. suppose yeah I think he's uh violating. laws and it's like well it's Obama it's. like yeah sure okay fine I might trust. him but then you're setting a precedent. that anybody else can be you know yeah. yeah and Kim bambl. C bambl is coming World War III is.

coming that's my those are my favorite. like memes it's like Call of Duty. footage and it's like me and the boys in. the Battle of Beijing. 2027 because Taylor Swift told our. [ __ ] dumb girlfriends to vote for. Kamal in a [ __ ] boat. Taiwan. [ __ ] is he saying K Boma no not he. that's just you that was me there you. like that one stop give stop giving me. credit for average [ __ ] you know what I.

was talking about you today I was like. you know who is incredibly good with. puns and you hide it even though I know. you know I see you smiling it's crazy. you're pun game no cut it out okay G's. cut it out all right how about that. Chris do you acknowledge that do you. know that that happen I think yeah yeah. I've seen it Chris has been around it. Chris has been. around yeah I've been on the receiving. end of quite a few of them um but I I. was about the us being dumb. thing I was uh I was thinking about that.

in the car today where I was I was like. man I I wish people thought I was like. really smart and then I was thinking. about how bad it would be if people. thought I was really smart yeah if. people were coming to me with like real. problems and being like you're the only. one who can solve you got to set up that. you got to set that death R up at my. house I can't set the death ray. up that's the kind of problem on if you. got a death ray I can set it I'm get. over there I'm going to need you on that.

what is a death ray I I bought a 10 foot. tall [ __ ] skeleton robot for the. party yes it's going to be exciting. giant alien that looks around I'm never. going to put that thing together right. so do you need a ladder for it. no pause I'll get on my hands knees. stand on my back we'll be good there's. no way no you got to build it on the. ground and [ __ ] can set it up or it's. like one of those things where you like.

[ __ ] they build the pyramids you can't. even figure out the logistics of the spe. Halloween death. ray people are going to be they're going. to watch this Spirit Halloween deathray. sales are going to go through the. roof I walked into Spirit Halloween I. said I have to have. it and then I got to the register and I. found out how much it cost it was not. worth bringing it. back [ __ ] this is a terrible purchase. dude it makes Galactic uh terrifying. Galactic noise yeah it turns out it's.

more of an alien than. a spooky ghost but that's fine look at. this guy 10 feet tall whoa that's cool. you're going to like it yeah you're. going to like what's going on over at my. house okay that's going to scare the. goats it is I am worried about the goats. they're going to get hit with the. galactic death rat the neighbors goats. are they're going to they're going to. have a oh there's so much to put. together on the [ __ ] death rate dude. look at this. we're ruined oh. man you're going to do great and you.

don't need a ladder it's 10 feet tall. basketball bring my mountain bike over. to your place at one point you told me. this yeah you're not going to be riding. it around on my property all right fine. there's a park across the. street you don't want you don't want to. see that obviously I want them riding. around you don't want to see there's. some H in those no you're right I know I. I was running around on it it it uh ran. up that one Hill and it's there there's. some holes I don't want to hurt myself.

like I would wear a lot of protection. you would make fun of it I it's. something that like again what kind of. protection do you wear when I mountain. bike I wear like knee. and it's a great exercise it's it's like. hockey shin guards yeah cuz if you the. pedals if you have like a petal like if. your foot slides off it slams your shin. it happen once it really hurts what. about upper body uh elbow pads and then. I wear like full face helmet and you. wear the full face yeah I'm bad with the.

goggles yeah I have to cuz CU otherwise. my contact dries out it's too much but. you know what I have fun and I I haven't. gotten hurt yet no that's awesome yeah. it's really cool shut up no I. swear when when I go to Harmony Hill I. would like bike there and a lot of times. guys would be like where's the uh where. the where are the jumps and I'm like. there's no jump it's just I'm bad cuz. they full face you're typically going. over TR yeah they think you're catching. air right you just got to tell them go. back you got to go deep in there oh [ __ ].

ohat on your. lap a that's very. adorable yeah have you ever gone likes. the. pillow uh not like not formally oh I've. had a mountain bike and I've gone on. some. Trails got Tito up here yeah hi buddy hi. that's good good to see you run. run I do I do want you to bring that all. right yeah that'd be nice just find I'd. like see in pads riding a bike around my. property did I did I tell you that last.

hallowe that big you going do a lap. pretty quick yeah I guess it'll be very. fun I was uh like I did I likeed to sort. of practicing in my street right outside. my driveway you like I have code set up. set up what what go and set up yeah like. cone set up to do swom to like practice. your weight shift on the bike on your. bike yeah your neighbors see you do this. and so last Halloween I was handing out. candy and then these like kids come like. how's the bike going I'm like good good.

good you're ashamed of it they're trying. to be nice so ashamed they so. embarrassed but yeah I committed so the. kids see it which means them and their. parents sit in the window and laugh yeah. and watch me yeah have you fallen off. the on the not on the con no yeah how. fast are you going pick up feels fast. it's probably incredibly slow I bet. you're flying I bet you're flying I. showed you that picture of me trying to. bunny hop I barely get off the ground. cuz I think you got to go the video yeah.

yeah I don't have the speed I could. never Bunny Hop I could never olly I. could never ol either I could never. figure yeah it was sucked. yeah sucked it really cuz you know you. wanted to bully skater kids and then not. being able to. olly I just wanted to be able to. Oly yeah you didn't bully anyone no. you're a sweetheart thanks I bet. yeah this episode is brought to you by. prize picks the best place to get real.

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yeah more they've given him the green. light yeah more more more than whatever. they're saying yeah whatever they go. with mitchoff from the Flyers more shots. on net yeah and kky more assists yeah. kky mitchoff it's a deadly combo yeah. don't forget about that c the Cs CS CS. isn't on the power play though it's all. right we'll get him in there there going. to be some line changes Chris you don't.

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podcast I at more like what do you got. nothing thinking about this. podcast apologize it's been a long day. yeah I had a long drive and a fight. about Halloween costumes yeah there's. nothing wrong with. that how many more times you think. you'll have that fight before before day. we'll see how Halloween. goes now I I'm I don't I genuinely. actually don't care yeah it's just more.

of a might be weird is the scent is you. might want to have a backup yeah which I. think they're going to cuz it's probably. going to be cold yeah. sweatpants hoodie I'll be there yeah say. here's a. cloak I'll be on quarterback jacket on. the sidelines I get it yeah we'll all go. as. Mages what do you I've got to have. something I got to fun Halloween stories. you go trick-or-treating I told you I. went trick-or-treating the one year um.

when I was a Philadelphia Eagle yeah and. got I saw and then uh I saw it was you. know like a split house you know the way. the stair well whatever I door opens. up guy is coming down the steps he's in. a full gorilla costume and I remember. seeing his hand go into like the glove. of the costume I was just telling myself. like it's a man it's not a real gorilla. it's a man and then he started walking. at me and I just like turned around. start crying and running as fast as I.

could full Eagles. yeah sprinting away yeah how old were. you I don't know that was I was probably. five my brother was Urkel that year who. oh did he go the distance he went the. distance no not the distance no no but. he would he would like perform it you. you had the little UNICEF things and. he'd be like how they put it in be like. do you have any. cheese Carl. did he want the face paint could get it. no that never even came up damn thank.

God cuz that could have easily happened. you could have back then people would. like yeah [ __ ] it of course yeah do the. whole cost I was Dice Man that one year. that was the superhero I created Oh I. thought you meant you went as Dice Clay. I was like sick no no no no you went as. Dice Man that's right I one year went as. a prisoner that was second grade I had a. did you go the distance on the. prisoner cuz then it might be RAC. just I just got that you got to make it.

believable yeah and uh I had a big crush. on my second grade teacher and she was. also dressed as a prisoner so we walked. around the school yeah and that that was. incredible she one. time I came in in the morning she was. like I I drove by your H I guess your. house the other day because I saw you. outside shooting baskets because I was I. like play basketball with my brother. after school and for like a month I just. played basketball every day just waiting. for her just hoping she drive by and see. it's just like total Huck fin stuff you.

know like doing cartwheels in front of. the did you ever have a crush on a. teacher um yeah uh what was her name uh. we had a Australian exchange teacher and. I loved. her fourth fourth grade I spoke with an. Australian accent the entire school year. really I loved her oh my God did you. ever have a like share a moment with her.

I mean we got ice cream that's nice but. there was a couple other [ __ ] [ __ ]. blocks a couple other fourth graders. trying to [ __ ] block me I feel like I. was so bad at school I like knew better. like that a teacher was unattainable for. me I never had a. crush like I always every interaction I. had with a teacher was a fight or just. you know bad news I never like yeah yeah. you were bad in school terrible like. your the whole time the whole time you. were dumb in like fifth grade yeah.

that's tough not even dumb just I just. never did any of the work yeah yeah I. just I like I couldn't do it I couldn't. be in class I couldn't like the whole. [ __ ] up yeah the whole thing would. just bothered me and then every once in. a while I would like really like when I. really got in you know Back Against The. Wall I'd put together like a good. semester or something but it was always. my entire life. was just terrible inter it's kind of.

surprising yeah you're not dumb yeah. yeah but maybe you are dumb this has. been our entire. friendship I'm like Chris is smart and I. hear [ __ ] like this I'm like you dumb in. fourth grade you know how you have to. actually be dumb I just don't it's it's. a lack of dis you have to actually be. dumb that's crazy well I was never like. at risk of failing out or anything like. that being like I'm not doing that yeah. I just couldn't. dude I remember taking just like the. multiplication tests yeah you know what.

I mean where you just do like as many as. you 60 problems do as many as you can in. a minute yeah the mad minute the mad. minute and I like I just remember by. number two I was like you're going too. slow you're never going to get to 60 and. then it would just like it just turn. just it just turned into like I would. just beat the living [ __ ] out of myself. until 15. 20 yeah it was like it was that thing I. feel like I have the same like problem. too when I like when I try to remember.

something and like my if it doesn't come. to me right away I start going like oh. my God you can't remember anything. you're GNA like and all I'm thinking. about is not remembering oh well like. lines in a show yeah yeah that's. impossible but even just people's names. people's Nam s you're like why the [ __ ]. did I get it all right I'm I'm. good. [ __ ] so. embarrassing the worst is when it's. something you think you you're like in.

your head you're like I got that like. walking into a room being like hey yeah. then you have to do it I mean I guess. that's what acting is but I know it's. hard dude you walk in. like start over I'm sorry everybody I'm. sorry everyone I suck yeah and you're. like thinking about how you're going to. be reacting to their line but instead. you're just thinking of what your L is. you're just or you react way too.

early we should put together that. instead of a blue bar real just how bad. we all are at acting there must be. insane [ __ ] Clips I John constantly. would just say slow down wa to hear what. they're saying it's the worst feeling. when like this person's not even done. their line yet and you're looking at the. other person ready for them to talk yeah. that sucks God it's also funny how much. better John is at acting all of us like. John how do I do it again he's like I'm. like all right I'll do it [ __ ] and it's.

the first thing that pops into my head. the moment I [ __ ] up is like I just. imagine John like behind that just. like what the. [ __ ] yeah GES what else is going on. there uh not much again I apologize for. being so boring um we're all. boring it's you know kind of wake up I. go to my trailer oh so oh god well I as. a joke is kind of no a joke to yourself.

by yourself no okay it wasn't a joke I. do like the song big man I put on that. you know the trailer had Bluetooth so. you can put on you can put your you know. music on yeah yeah so I was listening to. uh I haven't figured that out yet I. didn't know that I'm in there eating a. bucket of scrambled eggs D I asked the. guy he was like what do you want for. breakfast I was like scrambled eggs that. was on the menu he gave me every side. was scrambled it was all scrambled EG. there was no like or like I thought it. was a meal right it was he put they put.

scrambled eggs in every pocket of the. that's hilarious tray I got 10 pounds of. scrambled eggs with nothing no ketchup. just anyway that was funny yeah that was. worse than your golf story I a lot of. eggs. once it was a com amount of eggs yeah it. was a crazy amount of eggs and he knew. it was crazy he said it yeah he's like. you said scrambled eggs when I went to. the catering thing everyone was like. that's a ton of eggs you got a for that. guy for Shane he's eating [ __ ] 20. eggs before he films yeah I like the.

idea that he's like screaming at the. runner what the [ __ ] am I supposed to oh. you going to hand him a bucket full of. [ __ ] eggs yeah he'll eat it look at. him he'll eat a box of eggs right. now I was late one day I I I you know I. get a call hold on what were you. listening to in that trailer big. time Big Time by Peter Gabriel yeah yeah. wearing his robe no that's I was not. wearing the robe when they put the robe. in there I said Dan a. little yeah yeah yeah I was you know I.

like that. song I grew up in a small town everybody. has small town ideas not me I'm big time. that was. you my way yeah I just imagine you. sliding around like Tom Cruz in that. trailer that's what I'm saying I kind of. am a little big time right now with you. know Shane and whatever okay so so. anyway uh I get a call and she was like. oh just check to see where you are and. I'm like I'm on my way there I thought I.

was supposed to be there at 8:30 she's. like no or it was like 7:30 she's like. no you're supposed to be there at like 7. like [ __ ] and then I'm just thinking I. hope Shane isn't there you know yeah and. I pull in I see his car I'm like [ __ ] so. then I ran it wasn't like a far away to. run but I ran just to like he can't even. see me walking at this hour everything. got to me and I come into the makeup. hair and makeup trailer and the first. thing allly says she's like oh she was. like yesterday Steve came in here he was.

like I'm having such a good hair day I. was like allly shut. up I have to tell everybody we're having. nothing but private conversations when I. talk to you please don't get relax I. don't like hearing these stories about. you that you're this confident and like. what are you doing I like to have a good. time talking what you hate having a good. time no I like to have different times. of good times than you have you know. what I mean he hates a good time he. hates a crowded good time and I love a.

good time during the day. outside. myself yeah that's fun guys that don't. talk a. lot I I would love to see Steve forcing. you to mountain. bike can't happen I mean a bike could be. I like that'd be fun but I will say I. might I I would like to join I would. like to go out with you and some. strangers in golf and golf I'd love to.

go with you are they hey there is a lady. you could go out with She's So at the at. the Country Club what do you mean at the. Country Club you say there's a terrible. woman there's a there is one terrible. woman everybody's told me this person is. terrible and I had a runin with her yeah. and she was just like really aggressive. and rude there was a there was a frost. delay so everybody was kind of in the. clubhouse and she's like oh you're that. guy from Netflix I saw you in a golf. cart playing too slow parked too close. to the green I was like what are you. talking about really yeah I was like I.

play faster than you and then she and. she's like no you don't and she's just. rude you're getting Country Club fights. you are Mr big time well apparently this. one has been kicked out of previous. country clubs really yeah so anyway it's. that you don't have a permanent record. why why are they acting this one is. corporate owned so the other one was. like owned by its members this one's. corporate owned so it's apparently. harder to remove her but anyway this one. guy was over hearing it and we were. talking and then went up to the driving. range and he comes up and I'm telling. everybody about this woman everybody's.

piping in with their own stories about. her and then he goes yes Steve had that. interaction then he asked for a number. and it just crushed everybody was. laughing just the guys at the Country. Club having a good. laugh but yeah she's something else man. she's a battle axe she is a battle axe. me and her are going to join. forces burn that Country Club to the. ground they're going to be so happy if. you come I'm just going to come and ruin. your let's get a forsome no I don't want.

you to ruin it two strangers who are. your buddies yeah I have two buddies get. your best buddies to come with us okay. I'm going to drink an entire case of. beer puke on Country glub on the green. puke. everywhere that's funny bre did you park. too close to the green. no no not even a little not even she's. just making stuff up now definitely is. making stuff up she just out of nowhere. accused you made up stuff she accuses.

everyone of stuff it doesn't matter no I. don't park too close to the green no I'm. rules. oriented was it paths only that day. Chris was it paths only was it pass only. no I don't know what they got signage. everywhere if it's pass only she's a. crazy person I have no idea what day she. was talking about were you on the. path. again what day I don't know oh yeah she. didn't site a day no she just said she.

saw you the other day parked hey Netflix. I saw you oh she hit you with Mr big. time she said hey Netflix and you. chirped back I did and I regretted it. immediately nice yeah I mean I'm proud. of you for chirping back thank you yeah. you should you should do a staggered. start you start first or she starts. first I don't care just be on her ass. and just yeah and see who play balls at.

see who plays fast try to hit her with a. golf. ball that'll send her a message dust her. off the. play little gin. music you want to go come. on yeah can you do that can you can you. find a particular slot after her and try. to play through her just to demonstrate. that you your pace of play I've never. what's it can she hit the wall I have. never seen her physically good dude.

she's been getting kicked out of country. clubs she obviously plays a lot she just. she's probably nice what' she look like. is she older she is how old guess I I'd. have to guess 60 60 not old not old. enough to be yeah not like I thought. given the stories I thought I was going. to see like a very old demented woman. and it was like 60-ish put together no. damn big dog big dog hell dog the leash.

dude she's going wild yeah I would have. if she was hot this would be nice she. was hot this would have a totally. different vibe yeah you would have gone. yes yes Mommy I'm sorry Mommy yeah you. want to play. together yeah and you're saying the car. girls are ugly you said that car girl I. didn't say they. ugly I didn't say they were ugly. no you told me all the car girls s off. no D you stupid dude I didn't do any of.

that time out this lady wait hold on a. second go ahead you said the C girls. left a lot to be desired and I said what. do you mean you said that they're not. hot oh my. God he said all the guys in the country. club laugh and they say the girls are. ugly I didn't say they said they G why. are you acting like this if you because. did I say it that's I don't know maybe. that's the problem with ownership are. the are the car girls out there I don't. know I don't have you never seen them I.

try not to look too much because you. know I'm 41 now you know I don't want to. I don't like being that guy it's like oh. do you see that Snapper or whatever it. is you know who the [ __ ] calls it. Snapper this guy that used to run. Chuckles Comedy. CL he's like wait you can see her. Snapper if she you know cuz she moves so. you you don't you respect the car girls. yeah I try you don't even look at them I. look at I just I go like this you know. but when you look at them you would tell. pretty quickly if they were attractive. or not yeah are they attractive from I.

don't have great vision I don't. know I really don't going to get out at. the country club no don't do. that hold would love to take this. country club from you you're going to. you to get me into a real nice one. they're going to have a meeting at the. at the club the big dog is going to be. there in the ugly car girls and they're. going to we got to get the big dog out. that's what I was saying it's a country. car full of attorneys we can't get this. person out like IDE that you show. there's a lot of attorneys. there I like the idea that you show up.

on Saturday and all the carart girls are. hot you're like yeah we heard Mr Big. Time doesn't like how attractive the. girls are we're about to lose them. yeah they never have. Uncrustables they don't have. Uncrustables never have you ever had one. you've never had one no they never stock. them at the Country Club at the Country. Club IET saying that. yeah I thought it was all just like nuts. and pretzels and stuff no no they they. have Uncrustables and they never stock.

them oh so the Uncrustables are gone. it's probably the big. dog big dog gets there early I'll tell. you what if we get if you come we get. pair with a big dog I'm drinking with. you yes that I would do how come you. can't drink because I love golf it's. just like I don't want to I love it and. I don't want to be buzzed doing it yeah. you don't want to disrespect the game. it's not even disrespected it's just. like you just want to play your best. yeah and it just I feel like a kid one. or two might loosen you up I know I've.

heard that from a lot of people but uh. lot of [ __ ] alcoholics. gol there's a frost delay and people are. like well I guess I'm having a long is. on iced tea it's like damn yeah well you. got to at at nine at the turn you got to. re-evaluate yeah every time you go this. this thing's not going. anywhere 65 through n you got to mix it. up. yeah she was like hit she was saying. something I forgot no one talked about.

her game at all like she doesn't about. the game yet but apparently she plays. fast so she can play she can hit if. they're all calling her a piece of [ __ ]. and now one person was like yeah and she. sucks it's probably good you guys have a. tournament yeah when I don't know I. think it's past but yeah we do oh give. me the give me the date I'm going to. turn that into the waste. management bring 2,000 waste management. for anyone know just people getting so. Wast BR 2,000 dudes and scream the whole.

tournament holy sh I keep forgetting how. popular the Pod like yeah you could. bring people out we could have a nice. meeting the dog we could bring we could. have a dog's meet up at your country. club tournament open God is it is it. going to be make it public all right. next year the ugly [ __ ] car CS. serving us they're not ugly I would not. know you don't know about car they're. pretty great I didn't know I didn't know. about that Beautiful Queens I always. thought the pros just handle the. Beautiful Queens I mean very.

young oh yeah high school kids yeah now. that I'm saying I take it back now that. I'm saying it I take it back that's. gross that's as they are like high. school yeah oh man you're calling high. school girls. ugly it's impressive no I'm saying I. don't even know if they're they're you. know attractive we're ugly given yeah Lu. yeah I I nod I say whatever excuse me. crosss go no you. you ugly [ __ ] [ __ ]. you I'm going to tell everyone you guys.

are. ugly [ __ ] doesn't even have it. unrustable oh [ __ ] I shanked. it. great oh man I'd love to see out there. I'd love to go with you cuz I'm going to. [ __ ] it up for you and you're going to. get unreasonably angry I would be. reasonably angry if you [ __ ] it up you. know it's fun to make a score I love. like the tension of it I don't take. gimme putts I love like making. everything yeah yeah I understand the.

the thrill of it yeah you're like oh I. could almost beat my best score when I. was playing with those old ladies I was. about I I was coming if I had parred the. last hole I was going to shoot an 80. that would pretty good and drup two. weeks ago oh really yeah you choked I. choked so hard they I I know I talked. about it briefly but they they know the. St they knew I tell everybody like that. I'm playing with what's going on so. build attention what did they say to you. after you triple quadruple bogey the. last hole oh you couldn't find it cuz.

like you know I obviously I hit one OB. it was just you and old women golfing. yeah you were Charming them weren't you. they were Charming me you were Charming. we were having the. timer that's your type of fun it was so. great they were so nice they would just. like keep poking the ball. forward I love that and then uh just. worm burners the yeah yeah and there's. one this one hole it's like really hard. I got got on the green too and she she. turned me she was like where'd you go I. was like I'm on the green she's like.

woohoo I was like yes they were just. isn't that nice that's wholesome fun. that's wholesome fun yeah and then you. went home and pounded your. [ __ ] smut porn you find on Reddit you. [ __ ] deviant I like porn it's the. duality of man it really is The Duality. you're out there like oh Wahoo I got a. nice score. I found a new genre on [ __ ].

subreddit do you ever look at like. thumbnails and think oh that's for later. yeah hold on I'm trying to think cuz. usually you might have that idea of like. oh that's for later like you're saying. next beat or we're going to keep this. beat going I'm going to start with this. and go to that no I'm saying for later. yeah yeah I but then you come and you're. like I'm never going to jack off again. oh no I was I was saying if well I don't. remember it oh you're saying you see. wait you're looking at porn when you're. not jacking off you're like I'm keeping.

this that's crazy you guys do that the. deal sometimes do you know x videos it's. got to it's rare it's rare but it is. it's all we have down Texas way dude oh. you that right yeah they took a PornHub. well see I'm not a big PornHub guy cuz. to me that's all like you know what. you're getting and X vide wild card in. there x videos throws a wild card and. I'm into all that yeah so sometimes but. uh yeah they they'll have some. some thumbnails that you go that and. you're just when are you doing this what.

do you mean so you're not jacking off. you're just looking at porn correct. where would you be in the world while. you're doing something like that. sometimes it'll be like in my like lawn. chair recliner watching golf or. something on TV just toss some porn on I. don't toss it on I go to the website so. you know and you just you see what's new. yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah sometimes I'm. not you know not in the mood you let it. get you it's not like I'm checking it. like I'm checking for.

messages you know what I mean I know but. I just like the idea of sitting in a. lawn chair like yeah I am going to jack. off later yeah all right we've got that. settled Yeah because sometimes the. search is so frantic when you're in the. midst of it that you want sometimes you. want a a detached objective appraisal of. what's out there you're doing this too. yeah it's almost like a mental J what. what yeah yeah what you remember Matt. was on his joking kick yeah you're.

edging edging is more than you're. thinking more edging okay what's jelking. jelking I think is pulling your dick to. try to make it bigger over like stret. edging it yeah. yeah and you do this definitely yeah. every once in a while where do you do it. just like while you're hanging out on. the couch or something yeah I mean I I. haven't done guys better not be doing. this in public I know I haven't I. haven't done it recently but I used to I.

used to like when I was totally not in. the mood just be like let's see I'm. going to be in the mood yeah yeah and. you would find a video get in the mood. let me look at the menu cuz I got. reservations later. yeah my girlfriend's going to leave the. house for 30 minutes 5 hours that yeah. that is a lot of times when all of. course yep I know she's going to be out. she's G be gone tonight yep no it's me. time I haven't had me time in a while I. had me time in [ __ ] forever this is.

going to be. great that is nice when you're in a. relationship and you get to catch a beat. yeah brings back the fun yeah no. pressure man I remember this yeah you. don't have to watch someone be. disappointed it's. nice God that yeah you don't like when. you disappoint your lover. no what that's just a funny thing to. ask that's all it was just a funny. question to ask yeah no I the way I look.

at she better get hers I'm GNA get. mine that's the Bernie Max head on that. is as funny as it gets he in his Kings. of Comedy said he has like a cuck joke. which I didn't even know they were. making those back then I I don't even he. does it one at one part of the set he's. like he's like y'all [ __ ] for 45. minutes what you got to prove. three minutes yeah that's all it takes. and she better get hers cause I'mma get.

mine crowd's like she's like I'mma go. get a younger man go get a [ __ ] go get. a [ __ ] I'll watch I'll be in the. corner it's like really. good that is hilarious God damn yeah the. Kings of Comedy he's the best Bernie Max. heads theam one no it's K of Comedy yeah. do you remember the one his set from the. AP yeah I'm not afraid of you I ain't. scared of you I scar that could be a fun.

thing to rewatch is just the Bernie Max. show yeah I'm sure it's great. yeah yeah did that come did that come. wait oh man I miss Matt we need Matt. yeah he's so best I wonder what he's up. to I wonder what he's got. going you know he is he's you had a. guess what do you think he's up to he's. up to something. yeah he's always like working on. something he's working on like so. learning instruments is I I can't.

believe how good he is at instruments I. don't know when he picked that up was. that late in life or that yeah time to. get out of the house yeah yeah where do. you find the time and then he's always I. like I was dabbling a little bit I play. guitar yeah oh really like since he was. a kid yeah I was dabbling a little bit. in the uh that youngan psychology stuff. I meant to talk to him about it like the. dark Your Shadow Self yeah I don't I. don't like that stuff you would if you.

read it I like some of the stuff you. read of course I just like the ones that. affirm my beliefs yeah yeah not anything. that questions it no d i i i was I was. reading this book good healthy way to. live nothing challenging yeah but this. it is they're like uh I was reading a. book that I guess young had like put. together with his some of his students. or whatever and it it's just it's just. page after page of it's like locker room. pump up speeches nice about just. battling inner demons it does get you.

fired the [ __ ] up that's good yeah it's. it's fun to that's how you get hooked in. CU they don't really make arguments that. they're right they're just like here's a. thing here's a thing here's a thing this. thing yeah whatever happened with you. too you guys were intellectuals for a. while yeah you guys were like Sam Harris. guys yeah what you guys like space Elon. mus space guys yeah yeah whatever. happened oh you turned on him cuz he. bought Twitter I didn't turn on him. sure sure I still watch the SpaceX.

launches I saw them land the uh super. whole [ __ ] it was [ __ ] awesome. thing on Elon Musk worked a little. people that don't know him at all are. like yeah [ __ ] that guy it worked the hi. piece media they did a good job of. tarnishing his I mean not that he he's. out there doing he Pi side he's out. there got pushed to his side but he. certainly picked his side yeah he's out. there doing some wacky stuff but I still. like the I like when he whenever he. tweets that Tesla's doing well I get.

excited whenever he tweets about the. SpaceX I get pumped you guys are. intellectuals though you're big Sam. Harris man uh yeah it's just yeah if. you're you're asking like what happened. it's the same thing I think with comedy. where you're just like I'm not good at. this honestly like you had to uh to try. and have an actual an opinion on. something like to be educ. it's really hard and not turn. into like a douche who's just like.

that's what you guys were up against you. guys were about to be going Toe to Toe. with that yeah and cuz that's where the. intellectual thing eventually goes yeah. Matt does a good job with it because. Matt's very funny about it yeah but if. you pursue the. intellectual what are you going to give. a [ __ ] speech yeah it's brutal and. and also and yeah you your whole. identity sort of kind of gets wrapped up. in it to where it's really difficult to.

getting focused on trying to change. other people's minds. sucks I think getting worried about yeah. you're basically worrying what's going. on oh worried about like yeah trying to. change someone's mind sucks that's why I. like Matt's Matt's intellectual stuff is. personal is a personal Journey yeah. especially cuz he's telling me me most. of the time and I'm always like yeah I. don't like that and he's like that's. fine if you don't like it well I don't.

just talk about football that's what. people want our podcast they want. football yeah but you do a little bit of. the same. thing what do you mean I feel like you. you're like a historical. intellectual I thought I was till I. opened my [ __ ] mouth on a podcast and. then read comments turns out I don't. know [ __ ] yeah but yeah do they know. anything no yeah they comments on the. internet yeah sometimes you got to read. a story about a guy and then just some. people know yeah yeah every once in a.

while dork will [ __ ] drill you on. YouTube you'll be like [ __ ] they'll put. a link in there they'll be like damn I. was wrong way out of line way out of. line but then you get to be right once. you read the thing yeah oh you change. your mind admit you were wrong yeah you. grow you could. change I'm still waiting for that day. I'm still waiting for that day well I. think we've probably hit a wall on this. one yeah we're deep gerby you got any uh. gross [ __ ] you're up to I don't I do.

like to hear about your sexual ways I. know it's okay if you don't have. anything you've been busy you're. probably tired from work it is that's. why I I feel so bad I you haven't been. able to pleasure your woman as much cuz. you've been tired it's yeah there's just. not a lot do you just lay on the bed. and let her have at. it no. you lay down again I can do some ground. work go ahead do what you.

will. U yeah apologize uh stop dude you're. there's apologize about I feel that you. hit it right on the right on the head. just our whole day is doing something. that we shouldn't be talking about yeah. and then the rest of the day I just I. look a stare vacantly I've been watching. Harry Potter that's it that's fun it is. fun Harry Potter dies and snapes the. [ __ ] man I know that I know that. going into it as soon as STI told me she.

was like we're watching Harry Potter he. Chris has never seen it I was like. [Laughter]. doubled and you actually did not know. that I don't you knew Snape was a good. guy I knew Dumbledore I think it's like. all the stuff I've sort of seen on one. level or another but I haven't like. actually watched the movies they're. pretty po [ __ ] rules yeah they're. really good Order of the Phoenix was. [ __ ] awesome and [ __ ] Dumbledore. [ __ ]. hitting turn just disappearing with the. Phoenix I don't remember which ones are.

which I remember I farted real loud. during a Harry Potter cuz my my friends. loved Harry Potter we would go to like. the midnight showings yeah and in Harry. Potter I hit a nice fart on a silent. moment it became a thing I liked to do. it was fart as loud as I could during. and it was this was back when movie. theaters were packed you know yeah yeah. and yeah it's very fun hilarious silent. moment for it yes did you get a laugh. crushed you get a big. laugh that's one of my favorite videos. ever is a guy you all at risk of.

[ __ ] your pants no you know me you. know how I hit farts bro what were you. saying what you uh my favorite video is. a guy farting during. Oppenheimer the [ __ ] when they press. it it's like three two it's just silent. before the bomb goes off there's a video. a guy farting and like six people are in. the theater there's a guy in the front. all the way by himself like. but it's just it's wonderful CU they. wasted that movie's 90 hours long and. they finally got the most important part.

and guy's like yeah it's. great oh it's fun stuff me and soda went. to a Down syndrome movie theater once. when we were on the road I always. thought those were fiction they exist. everybody everyone working their hat. Downs like popcorn guy oh ticket guy. everybody and uh which was great they. were pumped every you go in they're like. what movie you going to see I forget. what it was they're like [ __ ]. incredible it's going to win best. picture I think but we got in there the. guy farted real loud and we were [ __ ].

dying laughing like for out the whole. movie we were laughing cuz it was just. it was an empty we were we're in like. Albany New York or one of these places. on the road and just during the day saw. a movie so the theater's empty other. than us and like a guy like three rows. behind us and he farted so we were. howling laughing the rest of the movie. we couldn't stop laughing and then at. the very end I looked back up when we. were all getting ready I was like who. did this I can't wait to see this man. and he also was mentally disabled D. zipping up and down his jacket like 10. times I was like shouldn't have been.

making fun of that guy yeah dude I bet. that place ran smoothly it did yeah they. were hyped yeah everybody was happy to. work there yeah it's that's. Heaven Popcorn soda popcorn soda stoked. on every movie they yeah get see go to. every movie for free they kept coming in. to watch the movie guy was just a mop. coming. in he said there for 45 minutes be like. oh. [ __ ] got to go back to work it's a good.

good gig for this CL God. damn well that's good yeah we'll get. some more we'll get fired up we'll get a. daytime one coming up okay where we're a. little more we'll think of something. funny KY on too we could get Kyle on. she's under the weather everyone's. [ __ ] sick yeah there's going to be. some rough takes this. week kylo is sick as [ __ ] there's going. to be some lines in the show where she's. like yeah. this is not. usual um all right well we'll be back.

yeah we'll get it we'll get it next week. we'll get a daytime one maybe a weekend. one weekend one would be nice you threw. a couple brushies couple bruskies in. there yeah so you can have. three I'm out I my guns clanking I don't. know how you guys do it no no no if it's. all right I'll have pretty easy all. right yeah drink and have the best time. of your life every single time then you. take four days off and go what the [ __ ]. being over sucks I'm gonna get [ __ ] up. as soon as Friday is done and then it's.

also a help if politics comes up you. don't look at the floor and go yeah it. is complicated stand Hey listen you're a. [ __ ] dumbass you don't know [ __ ] I. actually no I listen to Tim. Dylan uh no it's I I was jealous before. it's it's almost like uh when you're. single jacking off is kind of sad same. way like drinking when you don't have. really work during the day is kind of. like God damn what am I doing now you. work Monday through Friday you go I got. to be sober Friday is going to [ __ ].

rule yes you know what I mean it's back. the thrill is back and Saturday can rule. Saturday's going to rock dude the. Halloween party yeah I might kill you at. the Halloween yeah you're going to kill. me yeah Sunday is the real that's the. question Sunday I I almost I almost fell. on Sunday I was just sitting by myself. watching the Eagles I had that fridge. full of beer for the night before I was. like I could I could have a couple then.

I got a text that was like 7: a.m. call. time. like I can't have one or I'll quit the. show that's this this yeah the scary. Sunday is the scariest because you you. go I'm so hung. over one would actually help just one. one would actually 11 [ __ ] I'm back two. is going to make me feel even better. we're. rolling all right we got to stop G you. got you got to go to bed I got to go to. the gym nice oh you're jacked this.

season no I'm not jacked getting youro. Taylor you're going to be the most feel. so much better if I I of course I'll. leave you alone all right thank you. Stephen you seem really sad about this I. cuz I I know how like much you're. carrying here and I don't want I'm not. carrying anything yeah this is you know. we'll get we'll get another one going. all right yeah what are you talking. about you carry this with your golf. stuff I got to I got to come prepare. with a. really yeah I got to do better for you I. got to do better for you you'll be able. to think of some stuff all right we'll.

we'll make you and I will make a list. next time all right all right we'll. compare notes thank you everyone see you.